#another big fic lmao in less than a week
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seventh-district ¡ 8 months ago
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several days and 15 thousand words later, i am relieved to report that the suffocating urge to Write Something has been sated and no longer has me in a chokehold
#Seven.txt#writing stuff#thinking of that post that’s like ‘u Have To make art or all the ideas stay stuck in ur brain and make u sick’ bc yeah thats been the vibe#wish i wasn’t so all or nothing about it tho. but alas. i’m that way with everything in my life#i either expect 10k in a day from myself or i don’t write at all for weeks. or months :)#and my average pace is about 500 words per hour. so u can see. how that might be a problem. given how many hours are in a day.#and that’s obviously not sustainable. but idk if it’s adhd or what but it’s So hard to quickly start and stop tasks just Whenever#i struggle to be one of those ppl that can consistently write like. 500 words a day every day and then wow! soon you have a whole novel#nah. once i get myself in the Zone then i’m Goin’ and i can’t stop until i’m Done or i collapse from ignoring my body’s needs lmao#it’s something i should make an effort to do though bc i’d love to be consistently chipping away at things instead of working in bursts#anyways this is a lotta negative self-commentary for what is actually a Positive post! bc yay!! i wrote a thing!! Two things actually!!! 🎉#i got the follow-up to last year’s Matt oneshot done And i wrote the next chapter of Heaven in Hiding after uh. a year and some months#i wanted to blow the dust off the ol’ keyboard by starting with writing some less. uh. high-stakes(?) stuff#not that i didn’t put my all into writing them. i always do. just that ik they’ll have less of an audience so ill cringe less if they suck#so then i can hopefully do justice to the [N]MbD stuff that i’ll be putting out next! ehehe *rubbing my hands together* Finally#the next two [N]MbD fics r already written but the first little one needs a final edit#and then the Big one for. uh. someone (u kno who u r) needs a bit of rewriting i think. i wanna make it Better#so release schedule will be 1. Matt • 2. HiH Ch.3 • 3. [N]MbD small fic • 4. [N]MbD Big fic#then i’m gonna write a lil Boothill comfort oneshot. then i’ll edit/maybe rewrite and post that Dew (Ghost) OCD comfort oneshot#i ​also wanna keep writing the last couple chapters of HiH before i unintentionally abandon it again#and after/amidst all that maybe i’ll manage to get ES Ch.6 written and posted before the end of the year 😭#anyways ik i’ve made posts like this before. talking abt all these Plans of mine. and most of those things r Still stuck in the pipeline#so don’t put too much stock into this plan. i could have another Bad couple of months and get None of it done#but god i sure fucking hope not. i’d really like to cling to my creativity. if for no other reason than that it makes me happy
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sugarbbgrl ¡ 6 months ago
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She (Price x OC)
I officially have an idea for a fic I'd been wanting to write for a while now, I really hope it goes the way I want it to. It's inspired by 'She' by Harry Styles. I've been listening to it on repeat, trying to figure out a way to format it into a story. Feedback is greatly encouraged and appreciated <33
John is in a broken marriage. Candace is his younger daughter's homeroom teacher.
wc: 1414
cw: mentions of infidelity (wife), angst, heartbreak, children (LMAO), mentions of divorce
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John couldn’t exactly pinpoint when things changed. He’d always been a loving father and husband. He and his wife have been together for ten years, meeting through a friend and almost immediately hit it off. They share two lovely daughters together and a beautiful home. He may have been physically absent sometimes, work having been the culprit, but he never missed a daily call with his family. But there’s been a heavy shift in his marriage, he could feel it almost immediately walking into their home.
While John’s kids are more than elated, sharing tight hugs and a few shed tears, John’s wife is distant, nothing more than a tight lipped smile sent his way. He knows it can take a toll on people when their partner isn’t around, but they’d made a promise to each other: for better or for worse.
She barely said a word to him, her back turned to him when they slept, barely even touching him or even looking at him. It’s never been this tense around each other, but now you could cut the tension with a butter knife. She didn’t say goodbye to him once she left for her own job, leaving the task of taking his teenage daughters to school himself, which he didn’t mind, but just leaving like she did wasn’t adding up.
Then it did. He could smell another man’s cologne and her lipstick smeared every so lightly around her lips. His heart shattered, tears welling up in his eyes. He couldn’t even fathom the woman he’s been so in love with committing the sinful act of adultery. Every question swarmed in his mind, the ‘why’s’ and ‘how’s’ coming together in one big jumbled mess. But his wife couldn’t care less, just sneering at John and heading to their shared bedroom, making sure to lock the door behind her.
John slept on the couch that night, getting little to no sleep. He was restless all night, silent sobbing and tossing around on a couch not fit for a man of his stature. Those questions and the sight of his wife in the state she was in plaguing his mind all night. How could she do this to me? He thought to himself. I’ve given her everything and more.
It happened again the next morning; she left without a word. John sniffled and made himself some coffee, hoping the bitter beverage would liven him up some for the sake of his children. He would fake a smile while being home with them, not wanting to worry them more than they must be. He quietly washed himself and changed, barely even taking a peek around the room that was once filled with so much love.
Everything was completely different.
John had been home for a few weeks now, still keeping his bed on the couch, sleep coming only slightly easier. He hadn’t even wanted to discuss what he’d bared witness to. He’d seen more signs since the first night. Missing pieces of clothing, small marks he knew for a fact he didn’t give his wife, and even more avoidance on her part. He knew the conversation would come soon, he just didn’t know how to approach the conversation.
But then one day everything changed. He’d woken up to take his kids to school, the usual routine since he’d been home. He’d take his time getting ready, waiting on his girls to finish getting ready before heading out. It never occurred to him that he hadn’t met their teachers, so he took it upon himself to do so that day, making sure to look his best for the rare occasion.
His oldest daughter’s teacher was an elderly woman, smelling of chanel and lilac. She had a warm smile and wide framed glasses perched on her nose. She spoke in a light tone and welcomed John in a warm, grandmotherly hug. He made sure to explain his work situation and why he’d been absent to meetings, but avoided the brutal details. She understood and sent him off with her contact information.
But then he saw her. His younger daughter’s teacher was drastically different from the previous. About ten years John’s junior, she was radiant. Her hair was midway down her back, bright red with striking hazel eyes, seemingly staring into his soul and learning all of his darkest secrets. She wore a long sundress, the wind picking up the bottom lightly to show a pair of flats on her feet. She smelled warm, like vanilla and jasmine and lips painted a light pink. She was radiant, like sunshine on a cloudy day.
“Oh, you must be Mr. Price!” Her smile was wide when she laid eyes on him, greeting him. “Jenny talks so highly of you! I’m Candace White, her homeroom.”
John looked down at her extended hand, small and delicate like a flower in the meadow. His heart raced as his hand connected with her, his rough palms almost swallowing her soft ones. He was speechless, he hadn’t felt this attracted to someone since he’d first met his wife. His wife. The thought of her soured his tongue and dried his throat, he hadn’t even thought of her all day, deciding all together it'd be better not to think of her under another man.
“Pleasure to meet you, Mrs. White.” John returned the smile, dropping her hand lightly and stuffing his own back into his jean pocket. 
“Miss, I’m not married.” Candace chuckled and clasped her hand together at her front, correcting John’s misuse of the honorific.
“Ah, yes, my apologies Miss Candace.” John brought his hand up to nervously rub the back of his hand on his neck, emphasizing her correction. When did my palms start sweating? He thought to himself, failing to realize his skin had gone so clammy. I hope she hadn’t felt them when she shook my hand.
The sound of the morning bell rang through the school, indicating the start of the school day. Teachers and students alike swarmed to the front doors, doing their best to not be late.
“Well, it was lovely to finally meet you, Mr Price. I’d best get going.” She smiled once more and went to turn away, beginning her journey to the school.
“Wait,” John called out, his hand flying up to grasp her forearm. Her skin was warm, small specs of freckles dotted along her pale skin. “Can I get your number?” John asked, his hand firm against her arm.
Candace’s cheeks warmed, red spreading to her face and a nervous smile toyed at her lips. “Mr. Price-”
“I meant, can I have your contact information in regards to my daughter?” Now it was his turn for his face to flush, not realizing how forward his question was without context.
“Oh, of course.” She beamed, pulling out her phone. “Just give me your number and I’ll shoot you a quick text with my work phone number and email.”
John gave her his number, watching her intently, studying her movements as she typed away at her phone. He watched the way her eyebrows furrowed in slight concentration and the way her teeth pulled at her plump, painted lips.
“There we go.” Candace smiled at John after looking up from her phone, a light ‘ding’ sounding from John’s phone. “Don’t hesitate to contact me with any questions or concerns regarding Jenny! Bye, now!” She turned to walk away with a small wave, making her way up the stairs. 
John stared at the new message in his phone for a beat, admiring the new contact he has yet to officially add to his list. He knew it was going to be strictly professional, parent-teacher conversations, but the man couldn’t help but let his mind wander. Sweet good morning texts and dates set, his imagination leading himself into the deep end.
He needed to have that conversation with his wife, he wanted a divorce. He couldn’t stand being left out of dry, waiting around for her to finally change her mind. His interaction with another woman has opened his eyes wide, he didn’t deserve this kind of treatment from the woman he loved for ten years. He’d been the best father and husband he knew how to be, she betrayed his and their children’s trust. 
He wanted out, he didn’t care to be second any longer. She gets to have her cake and eat it too, just like John deserves as well. He gets to finally have fun.
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monpalace ¡ 2 years ago
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ships .. (ocarina of time/majora's mask) link/reader, (linked universe) time/reader.
content .. it's only natural you search for your nephew after he enters the lost woods on a dare. you can't have a problem with the hand dealt to you when the beast who gives you shelter is so kind.
warnings .. no beta, we die like the promise i made to finish this before the summer after my junior year ended (i started this in april, it's august). i didn't know where i was going with this after a certain point and i think that's obvious. reader uses she/her pronouns. large, legal age gap (reader is in her 30's - 40's, time is a few hundred years old). less of a fic and more snippets, but it's almost 7.5k+ words. i don't think i explicitly say which link it is, so i guess it's ambiguous? nephew is named because this would be a pain to write otherwise.
notes .. prompted (not inspired!!) by beauty and the beast, but also the batb fanfic i found after my friend showed my an nsfw ao3 tag account on twitter. beelzebub / lord of the flies from fear and hunger was a huge inspo for link / time's physical description but there is leeway for how he can be envisioned. he's still large as shit though lmao. the layout of the manor was this, only because i wouldn't be able to write this without knowing.
supposedly there's gonna be a second part. supposedly.
idk. i might hate this enough to just. not.
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The Lost Woods wasn't as intimidating as everyone talked it up to be.
Yes, it felt like the trees moved when you turned your back to them, and, granted, there were a few mobs of monsters that could get the jump on you if you weren't paying attention, but you had managed to get away with a few scrapes the few times it had happened.
The only thing to keep you company was the howling winds that grew in intensity and your own thoughts that were sprawling into whatever corners they could reach, but that was fine. You'd gratefully take decades-old gossip from the next town over instead of the creeping paranoia of what was behind you.
Of course, you would willingly go through this, that, and whatever else one thousand times over if it meant finding your nephew— and to keep yourself from reprimanding yourself from reprimanding the teens that had dared him out into the woods, but that was another thing.
Along your investigation, you'd found a broken trail of breadcrumbs that led to nothing when you followed them. They were torn pieces of fabric from his clothes, just big enough to be noticeable but small enough to keep himself protected from the elements.
(You'll forever be thankful that a younger your drilled the idea into his head.)
You'd long since discovered calling his name was useless. The only thing you've managed to do was draw the attention of a few wandering stalfos dressed in clothes from centuries ago.
The ones that had managed to find weapons were always the most painful to deal with.
If your determination weren't so established, you would've lost your sanity within the first day.
Food and water were no issue, you were smart enough to pack more than a week's worth of both. There were non-perishable options and several choices for your nephew when you found him; he'd no doubt have his fair share of cravings after being lost for so long.
(Three days was an eternity to you.)
Just before the sun had reached its crest in the sky, you'd realized that there were more empty clearings than trees. Wildlife had become scarce as well.
Where deers and wolves previously ran abundant, birds and squirrels that ran from the smallest of noises replaced them.
The wind had calmed, at least. It no longer wanted to push and shove you in whatever direction it pleased or steal the bag full of items you brought along. You didn't have to hug your sweater to your chest in fear of it being ripped from your arms either.
Instead, it was still.
Admittedly, the clearing gives you more paranoia than anything else.
When your mind starts to wander to places you'd rather it not reach, you begin to hum a quiet tune to yourself— your nephew's favorite— and allow it to ground you.
You were here for a reason. You wouldn't leave until you found him. You'll be fine until you find him, and you'll find some way to live in the forest that refuses to let its inhabitants go peacefully.
It's hours later when you hear the first sound of life (or suspended death) that doesn't feel like a threat— though, in hindsight, you should've been smarter and more suspicious of it when you first heard it.
A high-pitched instrument repeats each croon you let out, eventually taking over and silencing you. You follow the tune without much of a thought. If it were some sort of elaborate trap to lure you in, you couldn't be mad at yourself if you fell for it.
Clusters of trees become less and less as you follow the instrument and its recreation of your nephew's song. You call his name and are met with nothing but the music (from an ocarina, you quickly recognize) growing louder as time passes.
To say you're shocked when a large and, admittedly, well-kept manor enters your field of view would be an understatement. It's covered in vines, invasive arrowroots, and spreading flowers, but looks lived in if the smoldering smoke slowly dissipating in the afternoon air was anything to go by.
You couldn't begin to imagine who lived inside before the woods took it over (or what lived in it now). The architecture says it predates the Hero split in four, but you doubted the inhabitants of the floating sky built something so elaborate when they returned to the surface.
Your eyes jump past the crumbling pillars and dilapidated statues to the half-glass double doors that seemed to open on their own.
The music was coming from inside the manor now.
Steeling your nerves and squaring your shoulders, your hand grips tight on the strap of your satchel as you walk up the stone stairs covered in moss. You have to hold onto the guardrail installed next to it just as tight. Looking down, you find the carvings of it sorely separating it from the older antiquity of the manor.
Taking in smaller details (for future escapes or weapons against whatever lived inside, you'd figure out later), you find that the small pools of water that came from the sides of the manor and ran and fell alongside the stairs you climbed held small clumps of straw-colored fur. Some caused the surrounding water to turn into a pink hue that reminded you of fairies you've seen in childrens' books.
(Your hand reaches into the satchel to make sure you brought all of your nephew's well-loved books as well as a novel or two for yourself.)
(You did, thankfully.)
There's a smell filled with musk that permeates the air the closer you get to the manor, thick with amber and ginger and it reminds you of the times you come across a pack of wolves during your childhood.
Upon entering the manor, you find it was strongest in the wing of the manor to your right. It took over almost the entirety of your senses, but it wasn't an unwelcome or overwhelming sensation. If you paid close enough attention, you could sense the homely feeling underneath the ferality of it.
You prayed you'd be able to tell when the beast returned; if it was gone in the first place.
You take close note of how the foyer wasn't truly a foyer with how it was filled with windows rather than walls that led to a courtyard and how the only way to enter the wings of the manor was the winded stairs that connected via the terrace.
You don't fail to notice how the wing coated in the musky scent is coated entirely in shadows despite all the sources of light.
You couldn't decide if you were thankful or filled with loathing at the idea of what roamed on that side of the manor.
It's a struggle to turn your eyes away from the darkened wing of the manor, but you do manage when the music picks up once more from the left wing. It's significantly brighter and doesn't fill you with a sense of dread as the right one does.
Trap be damned, your nephew was here, you knew it— you felt it.
Reaching the top of the stairs, you find that you're inside a parlor room that leads to three other pathways. One was a library, another was a dining room, and the last was a small hallway.
In any other situation, you'd explore some more. The supposed beast that possibly lived in the manor kept everything in better shape than what you'd expect— or hopefully it was the forest spirits that lived throughout the forest.
Hopefully, those same spirits kept your nephew safe.
You have to close your eyes to better determine where the music is coming from, the only thing you can hear beside it and your own breathing being the manor settling. Your ears guide you inside the hall and you find it branches into a corridor, a bathroom, and two bedrooms.
Common sense seems to leave you when you spot the back of your nephew's head. Your breath quickens as you watch him clap along with the ocarina, you force your eyes to keep their clarity when you hear him hum each note just as you remember.
"''ire," you call in a weaker voice than you intended or thought you had. The nickname he claimed he hated so much tumbled from your lips so easily as you rushed inside the room, one arm rushing to remove your satchel while the other reached out to almost check if he was real.
The Lost Woods were known for their tricks, after all.
When he turns to face you, he's scrambling over himself in the bed. You're able to see how he limps on his right ankle and knee, how the entirety of his limbs were wrapped in bandage wrap as though done by a child. There was no blood, so you hold off on checking him over.
(The bandages were stained, thankfully not with blood. It was mostly dust and grime.)
(You'd have to sanitize whatever was wrong.)
You meet him more than halfway when you catch the way he winces and hisses with each movement.
"Auntie— Auntie— Titi!" His voice is airy as he speaks, emotion causing his words to come out as chokes. His arms reciprocated the tight hug you had on him, forcibly keeping his arms from trembling due to either nerves or injuries. "Titi, Titi, Titi!"
The way he says the word makes him sound like some chittering bug. If you listened hard enough, you could tell how his teeth clattered together, but you couldn't decipher if it was from a chill or emotion.
All you wanted to do was keep his head against the crook of your shoulder and neck while you pressed kisses to the crown of his head and kept him as close to you as you could, but you knew better.
Pulling away, you reach back for the satchel that you previously discarded. "What's wrong? What happened?" You force your voice to even out when you speak, hands already reaching for his arms after you sit the bag against your hip.
He shakes his head, but you've known him long enough to know there was something wrong. "They're from when I first went in the forest," he answers, voice quivering. "It's all healed. I think."
He doesn't push your hands away or pull his arms back when you skillfully unravel the bandages, carefully pulling and prodding the scars that littered the skin, and he was telling the truth despite the coloring.
"Did you forage like I taught you? Why are most of them green?"
"The spirits."
"The spirits?"
"And the soldier." He looks over your shoulder as though searching for their figures. "I haven't seen him yet, though."
Your eyes squint as one of your hands rubs over the strange texture of the scar, the other reaching for the antiseptic and clean fabric in your bag. "Are these spirits children or small trees with masks?"
You'd heard of both in legend. No one's ever seen them.
You're not sure which you'd rather watch over your nephew.
His eyes drift to his side before peering back over your shoulder once again. His brows furrow as he thinks of how to answer, head tilting as his pupils dilate.
"Both," he answers, "and ones that look like scarecrows. I asked them to bring you."
You force your gaze to keep itself on your nephew. You wouldn't let it wander to spirits you couldn't even see. "The ocarina?" You instead ask another question jumping around your mind, sucking your tongue in appreciation when he nods. "Smart boy."
An airy laugh leaves him, his face lighting up with a smile. "Learned from the best," he snorts.
You risk pressing kisses to the apples of his cheeks and forehead at his flattery, hands cupping themselves on the nape of his neck to bring him closer.
A younger him would push you away without a second thought, whining on about how you were embarrassing him in front of his friends.
He lets you do so now regardless of the spirits that surround you both.
"What've you been eating?" Your hands drop to his biceps when you pull away. They weren't thin like you'd expect them to be after three days in the forest; they were fatter than they had been before he left. "Who's been feeding you?"
His answer of "the Soldier," is quicker than you would've liked. "He goes out and hunts. He always brings back meat. I think it's deer.. it tastes.. bland."
"He.. cooks it, right?"
Another laugh wracks through your nephew's body. He knows you're only being cautious, but he can't help it.
"All the way through," he hums, flexing his arms when they start feeling stiff. "I think I don't like it because it's not your cooking."
He knows what your response is going to be before he finishes speaking, years of having lived under your guidance making him attuned to the smallest of your movements.
When your expression shifts from being relieved to disappointment with a twitch of your eye, he can tell you're not pleased with his statement.
Dousing the fabric in the antiseptic, you take his arm in your hand and begin wiping it down. "Don't be rude." Your voice takes on a less-than-pleased rasp, speaking lowly as if you knew the Soldier was near; but you still apologize when the sting sets in. "Have you thanked him?"
(You're sure you would continue to speak quietly regardless of the context of the conversation. You didn't want to risk "the Soldier," doing anything unfavorable.)
(Your nephew's words of praise did little to ease your stressed heart.)
"I never know when he's here. He drops the food off while I'm asleep. He brings books and carvings too." He watches as you wrap his arm in another roll of (cleaner) bandages, undoing the old one on his other arm while you prepare another piece of fabric. "The Spirits say I'm the most excitement he's had in a while, so he doesn't mind."
His voice was beginning to grow hoarse from speaking so quietly. You tap his throat to tell him to relax.
"They say he's nice," he continues, doing as told. Tapping the fingers of his now free hand against your shin, he tries to recall what all they've told him.
"I think they said he used to live in another part of the woods when he was a kid?—" His eyes glance back over your shoulder, suddenly becoming sure of himself. "— Ah. They did. They said he left and came back when he was older."
You raise a brow but don't speak your question.
Your nephew takes hold of your retreating hands in both of his.
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A clatter and snippy huff outside the bedroom door rouses you from your light sleep.
Nearing a week into your stay at the manor, you'd think you'd be more accustomed to the noise, but you aren't.
You carefully remove your nephew's head from your arm, using even more caution when trying to remove the conjoined weight of several spirits from your legs as you slip out of the bed.
It's hard, but you manage to do so without waking any of them— you hope.
(You still couldn't see any of the Spirits, but over time you could feel when they crowded around you and when the wind moved as they rushed past you.)
The floorboards creak beneath your feet.
You hear the sound of claws scratching against the floor on the other side of the door.
Pressing the crown of your head against the door, you tap your fingers along the handle to give the Soldier a warning and wait a few moments.
If you listened hard enough, you swear you could hear him scurrying into one of the other rooms before he shut the door behind him.
It reminded you of a dog.
Smiling to yourself, you're careful opening the door, keeping your head to it and your eyes on the floor. You turn to the other side of it to close it, waiting for the click of the lockset to speak.
"Are you decent?"
His confused "huh," sounds more akin to a gasp than any other noise.
You rap your fingers against the handle again. "Can I look up?"
"Oh—" he sounds choked. "Yeah— Yes. Yes. You can. Sorry."
"Thank you," you hum, leaning down to pick up the tray of food. It consisted of almost entirely meat with a few vegetables you figure are exclusive to the woods. "For both the food and taking care of my nephew."
There was a thumping noise behind the door, the frequency of it was like a tail beating excitedly.
The Soldier lets out a croaking noise and you know his mouth started moving before his mind was able to catch up. "No, I should thank you for looking for him— and for telling him not to use his name."
You let out an airy laugh. "It's common knowledge where I'm from. I wouldn't be a good parental figure if I didn't."
Another noise leaves the Soldier as you fix yourself to open the door. You can't discern what this one means. "I don't know when they started calling me the Soldier, but it's not— uhm.. A favorite.. of mine."
"Oh?"
"Soldier," he sounds more confident in himself and you don't have the heart to tell him you heard him the first time, "it's a nickname. I don't know where the kids got it, but I don't like it."
Readjusting the tray to rest against your hip and forearm rather than in both your hands, you hum curiously. "So what should we be calling you?"
He pauses longer than you'd think it'd take to remember your own name, but you wait.
"Link."
"Link?"
"Yes."
"Like in a chain?"
".. Yes."
You nod even though you're sure he can't see you. "I'll be sure to tell 'ire."
"Thank you." There's more thumping from behind the door.
"And thank you."
There's another noise from Link you struggle to understand, but you figure it's because he starves for conversation. "I heard what your nephew said about the food, too. I'll try to find something to flavor it with next time I'm out."
"Thank you," you repeat. Your eyes curve with your smile. "He'll greatly appreciate it."
Link raps his fingers against the door in response, but he doesn't say anything. You take that as your queue to reenter the bedroom.
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"How come your side of the house is always dark?"
You gently pinch your nephew's elbow and he swats your hand away, leaning impossibly close to the door that separates him and Link.
There are a few moments of silence from the man that 'ire filled with bated breath. Link takes an audible, steadying breath before knocking what you think is his nail against the door.
"I wouldn't want to scare you both off."
It was an answer you expected, but you were disappointed nonetheless.
"Boo," your nephew groans. You're sure Link could hear the pout in his voice if the quiet chuckle he lets out was anything to go by. "You can't be worse than what I've seen out there."
There's genuine intrigue in the noise Link lets out. "Oh? What exactly have you seen then?"
Pure excitement fills your nephew's expression when he turns to look at you from over his shoulder. His fingers tap against the floor restlessly, tongue already listing off whatever monsters he's encountered (read: come up with) in his twelve years of life.
"— but their teeth are the worst! They're poisonous and there isn't a cure for it!"
You have no clue as to what creature he was talking of now. There were at least fifteen of them who injected poison through their teeth, eight of which had no cure.
(You don't have to strain as hard to see the Spirits as you did two weeks ago. The shadows and light shift around then as they move to sit around your nephew, seemingly hooked on your nephew's every word.)
(You remember when he would crowd himself around you similarly whenever you would tell him a story.)
You close the book that sat in your lap more for decoration than entertainment at that point and place a hand over your heart.
"I drew a lot of them too! My aunt brought them with her!" He pushes himself through the motions of standing up before immediately stopping and returning to his seat in front of the door. "I'll show them to you if you eat dinner with us!"
There are a few stammering noises from the other side of the door and yet you can't bring yourself to apologize for your nephew's bargaining.
Your own curiosity was quickly starting to get the better of you against your wishes.
The noise he had made several nights before makes itself heard again. His claws (you discovered those a few nights ago) scratch against the wooden flooring as he moves to sit against the other wall rather than the door, his voice moving with him.
"I don't want to— I wouldn't want— want to disturb you— either of you." His words are muffled by the door and his growing quietness, a  regretful lilt stuck in his throat. "But thank you for the offer."
If he truly didn't want to join you and your nephew (and the spirits) for dinner, he was terrible at showing it.
"I know I wouldn't mind," you hum, standing to put away the book. A loud thumping makes the floor vibrate and 'ire has to stifle a laugh. "I wouldn't mind picking up a pot and pan again either."
"No!" Link quickly apologizes for his tone after realizing his outburst. "You don't have to. I wouldn't be a good host if I made you do that."
"Are you scared I'll poison you?"
Your nephew's voice drops to a whisper he swears you won't be able to hear. "She can't. She's the best cook ever."
You're not sure how the two correlate, but you'd take thew compliment.
"She won't?" Link's voice drops to entertain your nephew despite his earlier convictions. It takes on a playful direction, fur rubbing against the wood-tiled floors in excitement (based on prior interactions). "You've never gotten sick? Not once?"
'ire begins to shake his head but quickly stops. "Only from eating too much— which you will do, by the way. Best cook around," he reiterates.
Link chuckles, tapping his fingers against the floor restlessly. It takes him a moment to come up with something to say and neither of you push him to hurry.
You were both too hooked on his every word to do so anyway.
"I'll.." He's shy for all the attention. You wonder when the last time he got so much focus on him outside of the spirits. ".. I'll be sure to think about your offer. Why don't you tell me about a few of your monsters so I have more of an incentive?"
Your nephew jumps on the opportunity while you think over the plethora of recipes in your mind.
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It wasn't rare for one of the imps to accompany you outside when you went foraging.
You never strayed too far from the manor— the last time you had been dragged outside of the area you had designated for yourself (and your nephew) by the children, Link had to come and rescue to lot of you before the sun had gotten too low.
Suffice to say, it was a rather humbling experience.
Kneeling, squatting, or sitting on the ground had never been easy on your knees or back, but the grass below you had felt as though it were a pillow hailing from the Heavens itself.
Your body works on picking herbs from the ground before placing them in your bag repurposed for your (new) everyday tasks while your mind wanders elsewhere.
You're humming to yourself when a twig snapping breaks your focus.
It was a nice reminder that the imps hadn't, in fact, accompanied you that day.
Your head lifts to survey the surrounding woods. Your entire body was still, mimicking a deer caught on a hunting trip.
There was nothing immediately in your line of sight that could be seen as a threat, but you had lived a long enough life to know that wasn't enough reason to let your guard down.
You're slow to rise to your feet and your ears are strained as you listen for whatever had made the noise.
"I'm sorry!"
You can feel your body relax when you hear Link's voice call out from behind a tree. You sink back to your knees without much thought, clutching the fabric of your top to calm your battering heart.
You weren't sure what you were going to do if it were an actual danger anyway.
"I didn't mean to scare you," he continues. His arms move and you can see one drop against the side of a tree while the other tightens around the corpse of an animal. "You were so still, I wasn't sure if you were okay."
A quiet, breathless noise leaves you. You're not sure if he could hear it, but you can see his shoulders relax when you do. "You're— You're fine! I just.. didn't know that you'd be out and about at this time."
When the hand not occupied with that week's dinner (barely) lifts to grab ahold of a tree branch, you're shocked to just now find out how tall he is.
"It's not your fault. I didn't know you were out here," he grunts while gently tugging at the branch. "Are you alone?"
Your eyes drop to the flora that surrounds you to not feel so invasive. Your fingers rub against the blades of grass idly when a restless feeling overtakes you. "A few of the kids said they'd join me later, but I'm not too sure when that's supposed to be." A short, genuine laugh leaves you. "I wouldn't be surprised if they forgot."
Link lets out his own, quiet laughter that you can only clue together when you see the entire tree shake in your peripheral. "I wouldn't take it to heart. They say they'll join me in hunting all the time but never do."
"Have you ever given them a stern talking to? I've heard that usually works with spirits."
"They barely listen to me as is. I think you'd have more luck than me."
"Is that an offer?"
"Are you headed home now?"
A strange vice tightens around your heart at his wording while you look through your bag. "Mhm," you hum, standing now that your legs aren't like that of a newborn. "You'll have to remind me of the way, though."
"I can guide you," he hums in reply. "You just can't look back."
Turning your back to him, you're surprised you don't jump when a sharp claw gives a ghostly touch to the center of your back.
You're shocked that you disregard the urge to check over your shoulder every step back to the manor.
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You were no stranger to 'ire's night terrors.
They'd gotten better over the past few years as he aged, but all that progress had been undone during the near month you'd been in the forest.
Wiping away the tears that had managed to slip out, you ignore the prickly and uncomfortable feeling that comes with keeping your lulling head up so you can watch him.
You'd done it a thousand times before and would do it one thousand and one more if it meant he felt better.
You don't miss how his grip on your arm tightens when you start humming his favorite song. Your hand trails up to his hairline, nails (claws?) tracing the paint on his face that refused to fade.
You'd spent so long trying to scrub them and the green marks off, you hadn't even realized his skin had started to pale into a sickly grey in patches while darkening into (what looked like) a necrotic black in others.
You didn't even want to think about the changes that had started coming to your body.
You were, however, thankful you weren't thinning into a stalfos.
"You're not as sneaky as you'd like to think."
"How'd you know?"
"I have a young nephew. You learn quickly."
A brief laugh leaves Link from behind the cracked door. Though you didn't face him, you could see the way his eyes illuminated the wall in front of you, even managed to catch on some of 'ire's face.
It was a pretty blue color.
You don't comment on it.
"What's wrong?" Your voice has a deep rasp to it, your hand continuing to stroke your nephew's face even after he begins to calm down.
He'd slowly begun dropping more and more barriers (physical and mental) when it came to communicating with you both, having taken up shadows in their stead. He had gotten more confident in conversation as well, stammering and stuttering less the longer your nephew forced him to talk.
It makes you wonder how long it'd take for him to finally make true on those dinner plans.
"I heard him," Link hums just as quietly, the glow of his eyes moving to instead look over the sleeping spirits that crowded themselves around the space not occupied on the bed. "I was worried. Do you want help with them?"
A soft laugh leaves you when one of the imps buries their head onto your calf as though it were a pillow. "They've been like this since we first got here. 'ire," you press a kiss to his forehead when he rouses, waiting for him to settle before speaking again, "says they like to cling."
"You don't mind?"
"He's not too far off from them nowadays."
"Does he miss anything?"
Laying on your back, you being 'ire's head to rest against your shoulder. Your gaze is finally able to see how he'd take up all of the doorway (and then some) through the crack of the door.
You'd be shocked he hadn't flinched away if it hadn't been for the way his hand reached out to clasp it.
The tips of his fingers reached well past the frame of the door, his claws further, and you could only imagine just how much space he was taking up in the small hallway.
You were confident he could fit five or six of you in his hand without trying.
Your eyes jump back to the three (possibly four?) eyes before he can become self-conscious.
"Almost everything," you answer after pulling yourself from your thoughts. "His clothes, his dolls.. He could go without his friends, though."
His eyes jump from your face to the window as he huffs out a nervous laugh. It makes you wonder if he knows something you don't, but you don't push. "And you?"
"Hmm?"
"And yourself," he clarifies, "what do you miss?"
You're silent.
What exactly did you miss?
The feeling of your village's grass between your toes after the rain, the baker's treats that no other could replicate, being a part of such a tight-knit community, the sun after a particularly muggy morning—
There wasn't any need to be a sap.
"I'm not sure," you finally say after a long period of silence. You hadn't realized your eyes had left Link, yet when you force your gaze back to him, he holds it without issue. "I struggled with becoming attached to things unlike 'ire."
"Hm."
"What?"
"I can't remember the last time someone said something like that."
"You have visitors like us often?"
"More than you'd think."
"And what's become of them?"
The glow of his eyes drops to the sleeping spirits that litter before looking to the window again and you quickly understand.
The hum that leaves your throat is more lackluster than you intended it to be, but given how quickly the topic had changed, you give yourself the grace.
"Well," you start after clearing your throat, "what's something that you miss?"
The manor creaks when Link leans against a wall and his confidence in the movement tells you more than you'd expected.
You don't think you'd ever have the same amount of trust he held in it.
There's a playful tone in his voice when he speaks, one of his hands raised to scratch against his chin. "You'd have to promise not to be dramatic when I say."
"Is it my fault you use such outdated terms thousands of years behind my time?"
Link turns away to stifle his laughter, shrouding the room in darkness and forcing your eyes to strain with it.
"I can't say I've had the easiest experience understanding you or your nephew's sayings," he hums, drowning you in the light of his eye when he turns back, "the kids have to keep filling me in."
"Shame, and here I thought you'd been closer to my age. Have you been leading me on this entire time?"
Link's claws knock against the wall, his tail wagging against the floor while he huffs his amusement. "Have I? When I don't even know your name?"
If the weight of 'ire wasn't on your shoulder, you're sure you would've had a physical reaction of some sort.
"It'd do you good to not forget it," he hums, the movement of his tail slowing until it stops entirely. "Titi and Auntie, as much as I hate to say it, won't do much good."
Another lackluster noise leaves you as the arm trapped underneath your nephew lifts to rub your thumb during his forehead. "How fun."
"The kids are too attached to do anything now." The door slowly creaks open before stopping. It shuts so there's only a crack instead. "You'll be fine to share your name now."
"You never answered my question."
"Which one?"
"I haven't asked a lot," you huff before taking a softer tone, eyes rolling closed. "What is it that you miss?"
Link quietly snorts, muffling it by pressing his face to the door. He takes a steadying breath before saying a quiet, "a lot, I suppose. I can't name just a few things." A low noise leaves him, it's similar to a growl. "My friends? Playing music as well— my hands aren't good for much but skewering these days. My horse, Epona, too. She was the prettiest mare."
"Is she red with a white mane?"
"You saw the kids' drawings?"
"I've seen her before, I think— or maybe it was a hallucination?" The hand stroking 'ire's forehead stops as you scrounge your memories. "When I saw her outside the forest, I knew it was real. Another fated hero was mounting her."
You'd like to think yourself a master of figuring out what each noise he makes is meant to mean, but the one Link lets out once you finish speaking is short and of a higher pitch than normal.
When he begins to stammer over his words as he had when you first interacted with him, it feels like years' worth of progress has been undone.
"I— uhm— You— I don't— err— Thank—"
His tail thumps three times before he knocks his head against the door with a heavy groan. He lets out a quiet "Hylia, be damned," you couldn't help but think he hoped you wouldn't hear to go along with his frustration.
"It's been a long night," you finally prompt. "You'd best get some shut-eye before 'ire bombards you with more from his imagination, yeah?"
"Yeah," Link answers in a weak voice. "Yeah," he repeats to himself more than anything, "of course. Good night," he steps away from the door. "Sleep well."
"Same for you."
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The night Link finally takes you and 'ire up on your offer for dinner, your nephew and the spirits had taken to floating around the east wing's dining room to prepare it for such a grand event.
"Titi, titi!" One of the Kokiri exclaims, tugging at the fabric of your skirt (that Link had made out of a spare bedsheet). Her voice had a strange echo to it— all of them, really— and had given you migraines up until you'd finally become accustomed to it. "'ire says that you'll make your world-famous pudding! Will you? Will you?"
You ignore her exaggeration in favor of forcing yourself to wrench your eyes away unless you wanted her puppy dog face to work on you. "Should I? I.. I can't say any of you have been acting well enough to deserve it.."
Even in your peripheral, it's not hard to miss the absolutely crushed look on her face. Her eyes were wide and her bottom lip wobbling like she was about to cry despite your joking tone.
"But why—y," she whines, dragging the last syllable on while hiccuping on her breath as she went on. You know the tears pooling in her eyes are just as fake as your rejection of her request— but you know just as well who'll win the battle at the end of the day.
"I—" hiccup. "Want—" hiccup. "Cake—" hiccup.
You raise a brow. "Pudding or cake, sweetheart? I can't make both."
The girl begins to climb your back while you return to sautéing the vegetables, arms wrapping around your neck so she can press her cheek against yours. "Cake! No, pudding! No! Cake! No—"
"I'll tell you what," you interrupt, taking the pan from over the open flame once the food is charred to your liking. Your skin thanks you when you step away and douse the fire, the arid air leaving through the open window. "Why don't you ask a few of the others which they want then we can try and get Link to bake it after dinner?"
The girl jumps off your back with stars practically filling her eyes. She cries out for several names while she runs off, hands clapping excitedly as she shouts out the change in plans.
You're left in peace until your nephew enters with his journals clutched between his arms, bouncing between his feet while he watches you finish plating each food item on dishes you could only dream of owning where you're from.
"D'you think he'll come?" 'ire's voice is low, almost as though scared Link will hear. You know he does if the night of his nightmares a few months ago were anything to go by— but he didn't need to know that.
"He'd better," you answer in an equally low tone. "I didn't spend so long slaving away at this just for him not to."
"Is that a threat?"
The plates in your hands aren't spared by the flinch that wracks through your body. Your reflexes are quick to catch them before any of the food can hit the floor.
'ire, on the other hand, has no issue with voicing his shock in the form of a scream, scurrying from the doorway while dropping his journals. He jumps behind you, hands clutching the fabric of your skirt while he hides himself behind your hip.
"Well?"
Placing a hand over your racing heart after putting the plates down, your other hand comes down to rest on 'ire's head. "It's rude to sneak up on people, you know."
The blond fur of his chest rustles with his laughter. It was difficult to see much else other than that, what with the way he hid himself behind the wall connecting the kitchen to the pantry.
You hadn't even heard his footsteps or creaking floorboards when he first approached. Had he been there the entire time and 'ire hadn't seen him, or had he only walked in after 'ire entered?
You wondered if he was naturally quiet or if he just learned which floorboards were loose.
"Is it sneaking when you were expecting me?" Link's voice is lighter than it usually is, a slight tremble could even be heard if you focused on it enough. He rocks on his feet and briefly leans forward, a less organic-looking side profile coming into view before leaving right after. "If I knew I would be this unwelcomed, I—"
"That's a joke, right?" 'ire stomps away from your side while he speaks, stepping over his discarded compilations of works to stare up at Link with wide eyes. Your nephew ignores the way Link's hands raise to cover his face and how he backs away as soon as he pivots in his foot to face him. "You're not actually gonna pansy out, right?"
Your feet lead you to the two before you can have much of a thought. "Zaire," you say in a terse voice, taking hold of his shoulder and bringing him against your front so you can stop him from interrogating the poor man. "Don't be rude."                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         
Whatever argument he has dies on his tongue when he takes a good, long look at Link. His mouth gaped open like a fish, one of his fingers lifting so he could push it into the fur of his stomach, watching the skin beneath sink with the force of it as though it were the most interesting thing in the world.
"Woah."
If you had any less sense of dignity, you'd let yourself have the same reaction.
"Don't be rude," you reiterate, pushing Zaire's hand down until it finally reaches its rightful place at his side.
"No," Link breathes into his palms, clearing his voice to try and rid it of the anxiety (and, possibly, humiliation). "He's— he's fine. This wouldn't be the first time someone responded like that. I'd be more concerned if he did any other way."
Zaire shrugs your hands from your shoulders, stepping until he is toe-to-claw with Link. "Then why are you hiding your face? It can't be that bad," he says, tugging at the fur of Link's elbows, rubbing them between his fingers so he could better be accustomed to the texture.
Spreading his fingers enough so you both could see the four holes in the inorganic material, Link lets out another heavy breath. "I'm self-conscious," he can tell the answer doesn't please Zaire and continues speaking, "It's been.. too long.. since I've shown anyone either of my faces."
"A mask is.." Your voice falters off when you finally find the words to speak, losing them again when you fail to find a proper way to articulate your thoughts.
"It's mostly you and the kids, no?" You try again when you figure out a way to better word it. "Is a mask not.. Is it.. necessary?"
When the blue light that emits from his eyes lifts to look at you, an unidentifiable emotion shoots through you. He holds your gaze for a few, silent moments before turning his head and dropping his hands.
"It's like a second skin," he simply offers.
"Sad," Zaire sighs, backing away and turning until he stood in the center of the kitchen. "Can you still eat with it? Like I said, Auntie is the best cook in all the realms and you have to taste it to believe it."
Curse your nephew's skill of lightening a mood.
Rather than let his insecurities keep him from looking at either of you for the duration of the night, Link looks down at Zaire with a playful jolt of his shoulders. "It's not fused with my face."
Zaire's eyes curl into crescents while he grabs two of the plates from the counter. "Good!" His tail (a terrifying new addition when he first started changing) wraps around the third dish, walking himself past the two of you in the pantry so he could place each one on the dining table. "You'll love this then! Auntie," you don't miss the way he adds your name causally, "always makes this on a big day!"
Link repeats your name under his breath before doing the same with Zaire's. He lets out a thoughtful nod as each one rolls off his tongue, one pair of eyes looking at you while the other continues to follow your nephew.
He wrings his hands together when he catches the way you examined him oh-so-carefully, arms crossed with your head tilted.
"It's nice," he gulps as though every inch of nervousness had reentered his body. "It's a nice name. I like it. It suits you."
You don't know if you were teasing him prior, but you decide to do so now.
"I'd hope so." You pat a hand against his arm as you walk into the kitchen, ignoring the oily feel of his fur. You ignore the feeling of him watching and instead focus on searching through the cupboards for the drink you had foraged around to make just days before. "I could say the exact same for you, thankfully."
"Now, why don't you have a seat so I can play host this time?"
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mildlyannoyedscoundrel-blog ¡ 2 months ago
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Fan Fic Writer Interview
I’ve wanted to do this ever since I saw it on @hollow-lime-green’s blog but I have my phone set up so that I can only be on social media for 5 minutes at a time and it is hard to do something like this 5 minutes at a time so I’ll probably be chipping away at it for another couple of months lol
How many works do you have on AO3?
17! But I think there’s one that I orphaned when I myself was 17 so I guess technically 18.
Your top 5 stories by kudos:
1) Fuckery - JJK, Satosugu, 14.3K which is insane now that I look at it, Rated E
This fic is the bane of my existence istg (lh). I wrote it on a dare from my irl friends, slapped it out in like a month and a half and it became my most popular fic by far within less than a week. Sex sells ig.
Seriously though, there are some parts of it that I am genuinely proud of and even if my repressed ass wants to die of embarrassment and Catholic guilt every time I think about it I do think it’s a good fic. There may or may not even be a sequel in the works who knows.
2) Glycerin - BNHA, Kiribaku, Rated M, 130K
My baby. My pride and joy. The fic I always keep coming back to. I’ve been writing this fic since I was 16 and genuinely it has been one of the most valuable experiences of my life. It’s still holding on by a thread as my most popular hits wise (damn you Fuckery), but it definitely has the most dedicated and supportive readership of anything I’ve written. Even if it’s not #1 in my kudos it will always be #1 in my heart.
3) hug me, love me, protect me - BNHA, Krbk, Rated T, ~8K
Kind of a sleeper agent tbh. I wrote it for a Christmas exchange and it was kinda out of my comfort zone cause I never write AU stuff but I think it turned out pretty cute! (Though very goofy)
4) Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss - BNHA, Krbk, Rated M, 5K
It’s angsty, it’s cheesy, what more could you want. I should reread it tbh
5) Something In Between - BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 6.9K
Another fic that is super important to me. Straight up this fic and the zine it was a part of may very well have changed the course of my life (got me to break up with my girlfriend/childhood best friend of 11 years). I still get comments from aromantic people saying that it’s so nice to have a fic that makes them feel seen and even though my sexuality is once again massively up in the air it’s definitely one of the fics that I’ve poured the most of myself into.
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to! Though admittedly I’ve been lacking recently 😬
Comments are always such a big motivator for me and I think that 1) it encourages people to keep commenting and 2) since they’ve taken the time to comment it’s nice to take the time to thank them. I should really get caught up on my comments lmao
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Uhhhhh probably either The Thing He Wants or What kind of gift? though tbh I don’t even know if I would count those as full on fics cause they’re both less than 1000 words and were more just ideas that I posted on Twitter and decided to cross post onto ao3 cause why not. I don’t really do full fics with angst endings. I’m a happy endings only kind of person
What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
It hasn’t happened yet but Glycerin is gonna have such a happy ending I promise. I actually wrote the epilogue several years ago and sometimes when my motivation is low I go back and read it cause I’m like after all the shit I’ve put him through I need Kat to get to that point.
Insofar as happy endings that have already been published, probably either Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss or Something In Between
Do you write crossovers?
Nope
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Nope again
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Well as previously mentioned I tend to be a bit repressed so for a long time I didn’t, but I’ve started to a little bit within the past year thanks to the previously mentioned dare and Ykw it’s pretty fun I can’t lie. It’s nice to get out of my comfort zone a lot a little bit and according to my comments I’m pretty good at it so that’s always fun. So far my smut has been exclusive to Satosugu for the simple reason that it’s one of the few ships I have where I genuinely think the characters are attractive
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not yet, but oh man that would be the biggest compliment ever.
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
Oof this one is hard. The one I’ve loved for the longest is definitely Sokeefe, but that series is so genuinely bad idk if I can in good conscience call it my all time favorite. Maybe it would be if the characters didn’t still have the personalities of badly written 11 year olds.
Im gonna say my OTP is probably Kiribaku cause I just love how caring and supportive they are of each other while also being very goofy and fun but with plenty of angst potential too, but that being said Satosugu has absolutely consumed me for the past year and a half and I don’t see that disappearing any time soon
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
Hands Like Mine, Heart Like His (BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 8.8K)
It’s a really sweet story but it’s another one that I planned to be long and I’m such a slow writer that I had to choose one long fic to focus on and Glycerin is way too important to me to give up. I still day dream about Hand and Hearts though so maybe someday I’ll add another chapter or two
What are your writing weaknesses?
Speed for sure. I am so abysmally slow it’s awful. The absolute best I can do is maybe 500 words in an hour and that is super rare, like genuinely maybe once or twice a year rare, which especially sucks cause I like writing super long stuff that ends up taking me literal years. I have such an insane amount of respect for writers who can consistently get chapters out every couple of weeks or even days.
What are your writing strengths?
One common thing I get complimented on a lot is making my characters feel human/well rounded which makes me really happy.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I think it’s super fun! Unfortunately I only speak English and a little bit of Spanish so I don’t do it often, but I do have a chapter of Two Weeks where a majority of the dialogue is in Spanish and it was a really fun challenge (though idk how accurate the translation is lol). If the POV character speaks the language then usually I’ll provide a translation, but if they don’t I think it’s fun to just have it as is and either have the reader experience the confusion along with the POV character or try to write it in a way where the reader and character can both kind of understand what’s going on even without knowing what’s being said.
What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
Beiguang, CaitVi, GELPHIE. Basically any F/F ship because I am unfortunately cursed with being completely unable to write Sapphic ships despite the fact that I myself am a woman who has exclusively dated other women. I’m hoping Gelphie will save me though. Please.
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Glycerin and Something In Between are definitely the ones that are the most important to me, but I’ve already talked about those so honerable mention goes to In The Garden (JJK, Stsg, Rated G, 2.8K). It’s definitely short and sweet but idk I just think the writing is really good and I’m so proud of how the formatting in that one scene turned out. It genuinely was like a month of me brainstorming ways of visually portraying what I wanted to portray and I think it turned out really well!
Okay wow I actually managed to finish this within the day! (Though it did take me all day). I don’t really have anyone to @ since all in all I’m still relatively new to tumblr so I’ll just do what Hana did and say anyone who wants to go for it!
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ao3-oner ¡ 4 months ago
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hi oner!
im a really big fan of your writing, thank you for posting so much!
quick question just for fun: if someone could only read five of your fics and no more, and you got to pick which ones, which five would you want them to read? you can include wips if you want
im just curious lol, happy writing and hope you post soon
Hi there, anon! Thank you so much for reading my stuff. I hope I post soon too LMAO, life can be busy sometimes but hopefully I'll be able to find time to write more in the upcoming weeks. I'm glad you're enjoying my fics so far :)
Man, your question is really hard to answer, though - asking a writer to pick their favorite pieces is like asking a parent to choose a favorite child. That said, I never claimed to be a good fic-parent, so ofc I have my faves. If someone, for whatever reason, could only read five of my fics, the ones I would recommend are:
1. Metro Lines and Their Prismatic Tears - 10,000 words, Rated T, minor background ships, Peyz-centric
I've said it before and I'll say it again: I think Metro Lines is my best-written fic so far. I also think it's unique in that none of my other fics really capture what it does - like if I wanted to include a GuKe fic on my list I would have a handful to choose from, but this fic is truly one-of-a-kind. I like the AU, I like the characterizations, and overall I'm really proud of my work on this fic.
2. Mad Scientist Incorrigible - 30,000 words, Rated E for lots of sex, multi-ship (Lehends x Everyone) but RuLehends-focused, Lehends-centric
Even though I think Metro Lines is better-written, I still see M.S.I. as my magnum opus and likely the coolest fic I'll ever write. Writing this fic as the tournament was going on was such a fun experience and I'm still shocked that it all came together so well narratively. I really enjoy all the drama of the piece and I think no list of ArchiveofOurOner fics would be complete without it.
I think those two very cleanly take the top spots on my list. From here on out, things get a little more debatable, but for number 3, I'll add the one other fic that I've referred to as "my favorite one" before:
3. The Man Who Talked Shit About Choi Wooje - 4,000 words, Rated T/M for violence, One2eus, shifting POV
I love this fic because it defines "crack treated seriously". Every part of it is just so ridiculous and it was super fun to write. I think part of why I consider it one of my favorites is because I had such a blast writing it, but it also shows a different tone of fic than the other two, so I think it's a good inclusion. I also sorely need to include more of my T1 boys on this list, which brings me to my next entry:
4. Facecheck - 14,000 words, Rated E for some smut, One2eus with background GuKe, Zeus-centric
As my first and most popular fic, I feel like Facecheck is another requirement for the AO3 Oner list. That's not to suggest that I don't love it - I do, but I definitely think that I've grown in my writing since then. It would still be a good include to show that growth, plus it's a fun read even if I personally consider it to be more middle-of-the-pack in terms of my work quality.
For the final slot... damn, okay, this is actually really hard. See, if the question was simply which other of my fics do I like the most, then I'd probably go with 04.11.2023, but that feels way too similar to Mad Scientist Incorrigible (since it's literally just an extension of that fic). I would also consider including my Spider-Oner AU, Strand By Silken Strand, which I'm quite proud/fond of, but let's be real - I haven't included any CanMaker on the list yet and that's a complete sin. So, with that in mind:
5. Flash-Ult - 2,000 words, Rated T, CanMaker, Canyon-centric
It was a really close call between this and Heartbreaker, but I think Flash-Ult won out for me primarily because it's much sweeter and a good deal less angsty (though there is still a bit of angst at the end). All in all, Flash-Ult is a classic, feel-good hurt/comfort fic that I think suits my dynamic of CanMaker very well and is therefore a good representation of how I write the ship. I think between M.S.I. and Facecheck, there's already enough smut on the list, but if I were to include a CanMaker smut fic instead... maybe Unleashed Power, tbh? Ig that would also allow for a taste of my Omegaverse AU...
But yeah, that's my list of 5, plus a few bonus ones tossed around in between. They aren't my best fics, they certainly aren't my most popular fics, but I think they make up the best representation of my total LoL RPF corpus so far. If someone could only read a small portion of my writing, then I think this selection would give them a pretty good taste of what my fics are like. Hopefully, they'd enjoy them as much as you have, anon!
Thanks for the ask - it was certainly an interesting one - and have a great day, wherever you are!
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michameinmicha ¡ 3 months ago
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Hi Micha,
Re: your post about the two people gifting each other fics for the same pairing continuously - I suppose it's possible the time frame and number of fics might fit another set of fandom friends, but I have a suspicion I'm one half of that. A regular reader nudged this post my way, actually. If so, I'd just like to thank you very much for not naming the fandom, pairing or usernames! It's the kind of ship that leads to us getting harassment on a semi-regular basis anyway (hence the locked posting of fics), and we don't need more of that.
As for the true love thing - we started gifting each other in exchanges because we both realised we've been madly in love with the same character in that fandom since we were children. So FWIW, you're right about the true love, but in the wrong way. :D
Hello! (I saw you sent this last night? (Well where i live it was night) and i wanted to take some time to write a proper answer (although now it got super long sorry))
(Edit: You know what, im putting this under a read more, its not gonna be interesting to most people who aren't the anon anyway lmao)
Im happy to hear from you (and if you wanna chat off-anon feel free to dm me) and just judging from your message i also think you might be right! (Ive seen a handful of pairings mentioned in the notes who might fit but arent the one i talked about, ...i cant explain it but i have a feeling it might be you)
At first when i made the post i didnt expect it to get this big but when it did and some people started to ask or make guesses about the pairing i was curious if anyone would guess right (and really didnt believe it could happen tbh) but then it kept getting bigger and people took it as a challenge and i finally i decided i didnt want to say it anyway. Im glad your little corner of the internet stays calm and nice <3
I hope you dont mind the post, it really touched me to see your works and i just wanted to share that experience and make others feel a bit of this emotion too.
i was too shy to comment on the fics i read (sorry im working on getting better at it) but im hoping you'll read this answer so i want to use this opportunity to say some of my thoughts (I would have liked to send you some friendly anons to say this back then😅 but you didnt have tumblrs linked in your ao3 profiles) i enjoyed reading your stories a lot! I had some really stressful weeks when i came across the pairing tag and even though im not really in the fandom myself (besides enjoying what i knew of the source material years ago) i was happy to find it! it was such a nice little treasure, this collection of stories to read when i was feeling down and they cheered me up a lot! So yeah im sorry to hear you get harrassment for it but i for one am glad you post the fics despite that, because then i could find and appreciate them! (this all sounds very sappy but i mean it!)
Im happy that you two found each other! I gotta say 'true love' to me is just as much platonic as romantic (like, the relationship i have with my best friend isnt anything less than true love to me) but i also think its wonderful that you share that love for your character!
I hope you two are doing great, please tell your friend that i appreciate their work (and yours of course!) And i wish you that you can keep doing this for as long as it makes you happy!
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pochapal ¡ 1 year ago
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How's the writeup coming along? (Not meaning to pressure, just wondering)
full transparency i've not had the chance to work on it for almost two weeks now on account of a number of really big and pressing deadlines coming up - i really overestimated my ability to juggle numerous large projects at the same time lmao.
writeup stats as of today are 7300 words done with 1.5 sections left to go. this is frustrating because that is maybe two days' worth of work max left but i keep not having the time to do that. i know exactly what i want to say and how to say it but there are just so many other things screaming for my more immediate attention at all times.
to give a loose timeline, my most pressing deadline is coming up on the 18th (this is the first part of my thesis to be submitted in advance of my pre-transfer review upon which my phd candidacy depends, so Highly Important). after that my christmas break is from december 22nd until january 15th. in terms of writeup timelines, once this first submission is done i'll probably either get it up some point between the 19th and the 22nd, or at some point a few days after the christmas period itself (from either the 27th or the 28th onwards maybe?). i'm also hoping to read through another chapter during this break too - this'll probably be early on in the new year looking at what i have on my plate. after that i have a second deadline coming up on january 12th (this is a much smaller project so it probably shouldn't take up more than a week), and then tentatively nothing until mid-february. subject to change of course but this is what i'm working around.
so i'm hoping to get the writeup done before the year's end and at the very least read another chapter before my break ends. i also wanna sneak in a couple pickle route updates during this time if i can as well, but i'm not as worried there since there's less planning and arranging with my fic beyond a couple free days and the right vibes. no hard dates because everything is up in the air forever, but this is what we're working with here. in the more immediate-term i should be more confident about the chapter 14 writeup as soon as this first thesis submission is behind me!
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myloveforhergoeson ¡ 8 months ago
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Yeah, uh, sorry not sorry for that comment I just left on your AO3...
hii omg sorry this took me so long to respond to i had like the most shit day at work yesterday but seeing your comment made my day so much better 😭 had to take a moments rest before i responded lol but here i go!!!!!!!!
" I love how Roxy was able to translate Logan's love science into something the rest of the group would understand. And Roxy's reaction to James dressed as a robber was great."
love science my beloved. literally my fav running gag on the show + im not bringing it up in my fic enough i think... and yeahh! it's also love science: elevated heartrate --> experiencing a high stress situation w someone --> you love them is basically what it boils down to LMAO though it's much more scientific i swear. i had a social psychology professor in college who brought this concept up like once a week (he talked about his ex literally every class period if he could) and how he took his ex extreme mountain biking on their first date to use this concept or smth. dan if you're reading this this chapter is dedicated to you <3
"Yikes. Still trying to deal with the James/Camille saga, eh?"
she said she's over it!!! but is she ever really over it!!! roxy...
"Oh my God. I can tell that the typical teenage communication problems are going to happen again. Although, I understand Roxy's hesitation about dating in the limelight. Who wants to live in a fishbowl?"
ah... not me giving them communication problems again... whoopsies.... 💀 looks like they were able to avoid media attention tonight tho - it's a problem for another day now! now that it's on her mind she'll be able to process her feelings a bit more thoroughly!
"Gotta admit. Katie played the right ploy to get Roxy alone for advice."
if anyone told me shit was scratching in my walls i would also have a similar reaction lmao. thank god the palm woods isn't rat infested!
"(Seriously. I sometimes find it amusing he acts more like a big brother to Katie than Kendall does.)"
i also think this was a bit of a strange move by the writers honestly, but i have no idea what it's like to have brothers? so maybe kendall is just oblivious (likely) or he doesn't care at all because he knows katie can take care of herself (less likely) or he's hoping his mom will just take all of that on from her daughter (most likely)
"Oh my God! Roxy really does know her boyfriend well, doesn't he? Suppose that's one way to get an overprotective big brother off Katie's back, even if it's only temporary. And the way you described James being so tender and mindful of her comfort even in their more heated make-out sessions just... oof. I'm a puddle, mate. I'm a puddle."
i like it when oc x canon kiss :) and james needs to be good to her or i'll literally kill him off in the story idc
"Oh Roxy, Roxy, Roxy. You had to know trying to intervene with an overprotective James wasn't going to end well. (Scratch that. She'd never seen him like this, so...) But seriously. Lord help any future daughter(s) James has."
maam said 'i can fix him' and proceeded to fuel the fire lit under him WHOOPS. she's so funny sometimes like 'omg no this is why i like him he cares about his friends so much... i should be supportive, but in my own way...' girl katie needs your help!!!! and very true, she's never seen him like this and she knows how much he commits to his plans! it was certainly a strange night for them
"Flexing jawline? Hello! (Seriously. There are some moments in the show where James has no right to look so good.) And poor Roxy constantly having her food taken away because James was so freaked out over Katie and Kyle. Let the girl have her burger, damn it. (Seriously, though. James better make up for it.)"
BWAHAHA i saw this tiktok the other day about how guys pose for pictures by kissing their partners on the cheek just so they can show off their jawline so that subconsciously made it's way into the story. i supposeeee james can get weird about Katie and kyle as long as roxy has something nice to look at... poor roxy and her burger 😭 she's hungry james!
"I feel like James trying to be all blase about Keaton being scared off by her dad is to cover the fact that he was momentarily scared of her dad."
he is so scared of declan <3
"Okay. With that cliffhanger at the end, I could hear the 'Oh oh oh-oh oh...' playing in my head. Because you know it would be playing if this happened in the actual episode. (Wait. How did Brand New Day manage to schedule Big Time Rush?) Are we going to get a protective Big Time Rush next chapter because of Roxy's history with those douchebags?"
IM SO SORRY ABOUT THE CLIFFHANGER i always feel so bad ending on one 😭 but next chapter will be worth it i promise! next time i'll have the radio switch on and play the theme song or something lmaooooo. sidenote: do you think they wrote big time rush and it already had the oh oh oh-oh oh in it and they were like 'oh wow this is PERFECT for the show lets use it all the time' or they wrote the oh oh oh-oh oh in specifically to be used in the show? idk
THANK YOU SO MUCH AS ALWAYS MY FRIEND you are my #1 rames rant enabler and i appreciate it so so so much. i totally forgot to leave comments on your stories from this week im SORRY they'll be flying into your inbox asap <3
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jackals-ships ¡ 13 days ago
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Every odd number for ziir
SLAPPIN this baby down i kept wandering off <3 and also forgot how to count so this is like. probably them HF
under a cut bc it's a good amount of questions and also everyone knows Ramble Hours tm
1: What is your OC's favourite way to recieve pleasure from another person? (sexual or non-sexual)
non-sexually; rub and massage the base of her ears. she has a LOT of jaw tension that radiates up and it'll get her boneless (same for the base of her tail)
sexually; vampires get to be weird as a treat to me and thus have venom in their fangs that help facilitate easier feeding And the release of it works as a positive feedback loop via endorphin release. so what im sayin is let her nibble as a treat Or y'know how they milk snake venom? that
3: How often do they cry?
she has cried a grand total of three times that she'll admit to. once when losing Martin to the Dragon, once when killing her Family, and once when she failed to get to Lucien in time
otherwise it's a very rare thing, usually happens if she gets drunker than she meant on the anniversaries of their deaths
5: What's their relationship like with their parents?
ziir voice what are parents (thats just about the saddest thing i ever heard get said)
in this case it would be the Eight And One and Well. if they weren't already ‘dead’ she'd be throwing down in a heartbeat
7: Do they believe in soulmates?
she thought Martin was hers. it's a little hard not to when you're told “in your face I behold the sun’s companion” by a man who swore he got dreams from the gods. she doesn't anymore
9: Are they a top or bottom?
top, prrobably stone top if she had the terminology
11: What would it take to break them?
losing more people she cares about. that's part of why she's so closed off, because people just keep Dying around her and she's already about lost every marble she has tyvm
13: What is their deepest, darkest fear and how did it come about?
dying alone. dying in general scares the fuck out of her (i have a fic somewhere that's old as hell that explores vampirism being inherently traumatic Because you're dying) but it's specifically being by herself that does it
[15: answered here! <3]
17: What phrase would a loved one have to say to immediately crush them?
“You really are a monster.” or "You really can't change, can you?"
19: Are they sexually active? What are their thoughts on sex?
i think she is to some degree both as a distraction And an easy way to feed. people are less likely to notice her biting if she's already been nipping at their neck/tits/thighs/etc
but generally she's very. neutral on it. very “that is something people do yes and I sometimes engage. why are you making it to be A Big Production,”
21: Describe their mental state in one word.
penitent
23: What would it take to break their trust?
lying to her, it brings up unpleasant memories and is the fastest way to end up on her shit list (if it's small enough the trust can be regained, bigger ones are more likely to result in a vanishing act on Someone's end)
25: Have they ever acted on their intrusive thoughts before? What was the outcome?
YEAH ACTUALLY LMAO it's how she got recruited into the brotherhood. after Martin died she wasn't doing. well. to put it lightly. we're talking “we gotta keep the Champion of Cyrodiil from killing herself by jumping off the White-Gold Tower because that is Bad PR” not doing well
so one night she just kinda. snapped. it was technically an accident (she didn't mean to act on the thought that said he was being so loud and she wanted some quiet and snapping his neck would be faster)
and the guilt was almost overwhelming, even more so when Lucien showed up a week later offering her a “gift” of a new family (not enough evidently though, to stop her when she finally accepted)
27: What is their opinion on kids? Would they like to have them someday?
oh she does NOT. know what to do with them. there's no memories to pull from so she's 🧍‍♂️ that sure is. a small guy why. why is it so fragile. btw-
an even when she gets over her gestures at all of her she doesn't want kids. she's effectively immortal. she'll outlive them
29: Do they kink shame often? If so, over what?
looking at ziir like girl you have no legs to stand on HMFJ nah she doesn't like. Care what anyone's up to she's got bigger things to deal with
31: What's stopping them from functioning to the best of their abilities?
guilt. it's why the ziir as sheo cut out the mortal part because holy FUCK she needs to learn to let go and move on
33: What words do they desperately need to hear, even if they don't realise it?
you couldn't have changed anything. his fate was written before you were even made and spending a few hundred years beating yourself up isn't gonna bring him back. it's not gonna bring anyone back. so moving on isn't a betrayal of their memories (and besides you know ocheeva at the least would be flicking your muzzle telling you to stop moping, everyone dies sometime)
35: What turns them off?
hm hm. being grabby and Pushy. while she is amused by partners who are demanding/needy the moment they start grabbing at her more than like. her shoulders/back she starts getting Annoyed
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m1ckeyb3rry ¡ 4 months ago
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Your new song/header text thing (idk what that area is called lowk) was fr actually just me this past week or two
Pause this is not in our convo but EXCUSE ME KARASU SERIES??? I SEE THAT HEADER GAME TOO HELLO WHAF IS THAT I need to hear the inspiration behind that idea….
Omfg it’s not even near Halloween anymore ok but puss in boots Karasu would be so hot….losing my mind reading this is making me realize how long it’s been wtf glad you didn’t get piled with work on halloweekend though!! I guess on the flip side this means 2-3 weeks away from winter hibernation era LOL
Been so long I barely remember what happened in the episode but now that I think yes I do mad we didn’t get a full day before the match interaction compilation BUT ANALYST KARASU LOOKED SOOOOO GOOD barousagi rivalry on top though they’re dynamic is so much more uhh what’s the word enriching…? That’s not the one I was looking for but growth promoting I can’t find the synonym I need right now wait speaking of the itoshi brother beef being one sided is actually insane I’m ngl it makes rin seem so pathetic LMFAOOOO
LMAAOA it feels like it’s been a millennia since I’ve seen the acronym oaeu forced tumblr cleanse was not on my bucket list but omg that’s right can’t wait to see wingman chigiri too!!
LMAOA our chemical reaction actually cannot be topped Isagi get out of the way we’re the new egoists here (this lowk sounds kinda cringe but whatever)
OK BUT AT LEAST YOU FINISHED PI!! Like you let the quality work marinate and stew and then you cooked by finishing it ofc no hate to writers who cliffhanger stories because I’m sure they don’t mean to and things happen but you came back stronger than ever fr
But FRRRR the tags are always filled with those short blurb mass character things that we talked about ykw is actually hilarious though I was about to be like wait there’s some for nagi and peregrine came to mind and I was like lmao wait you wrote that nvm Kaiser and sae dominating the tags actually my villain origin story I still can’t believe people like sae that much considering we also don’t really see him THAT much like
The name inheritance has such aura omg wait the nature vs nurture idea for the fic is so cool though like having that as an underlying theme goes hard…also if Tullia got with Karasu id end up swerving still lowk but anyways current pursuit with Nagi >>>>>
FRRRR ITS ABOUT TO BE SIX KINDA SOON TOO?? Actually insane can’t imagine the past several months without our convos!!! LMAO THE VELOCITY EDIT COMPARISON so true though id rather have less things but with more substance
Ok merging into a mega post because I don’t want to scroll all the way again oops
Spontaneous late night hangouts are the best that’s where all the good convos happen LMAOO
Sadly have yet to locate the ds I definitely did not throw it but lowk might be buried within storage somewhere from my last big cleanup session so maybe that’s a winter clean out activity…
LAMAOAO ME the last resort option fr when there was nothing left honestly the concept of the platform was pretty good though it just got ruined by the recent paywalls/premium etc and then well. The people. LMAO
OMG YEAH wait i remember i read part of it but got distracted by pursuit and oaeu and bfb im pretty certain i got to the part where she runs across the ocean?? Definitely got past the point where her whole ct is explained and whatnot though that’s actually such a cool concept though another Mira big brain idea
Your brain is actually too big I fear wait also the whole innuendo of them wanting to fight each other for them being in love is actually genius like I need more words for the word genius I also love the way you did it so like eloquently in a way that it doesn’t feel weird or awkward too??? Like also considering (iirc) neither of us are really into the freaky (imagine this in the really bold real italic goofy ass font) side of things I think this was executed so well honestly maybe a writing side hustle is something you should consider LOL
Oaeu so canon at this point it’s hilarious we need an oaeu moment in additional time fr also YEAH USGHS I CANT believe they skipped over that and so many scenes generally no wonder I was like this third selection arc felt REALLY short yeah now we know why UGHHH CHIPMUNK KARASU YOU WILL MEVER BE FORGOTTEN
Wait speaking of your recent nagi drawing with that meme LMAO SO TRUE he also looks so cute i love his hair in your style but yeahhhh given how dubs also sound really stiff generally i figured the southern accent dubs weren’t much better….lmao……
Shidou Karasu dynamic so true I totally forgot to mention in pwc they have some interactions too and Shidous always like “Karasu chan!!” he really thinks Karasu is his bestie so I guess we know why they teamed up within PxG???
APSHDISS YEAH ok maybe it’s a specific demographic subsection of blue lock fans but yeahhh ok wait also the recent ep also did him even dirtier LMFAOA if ykwim that one panel/scene where his face is kinda fucked up SHSHSHSH
NOOO UGH where are the karasus and yukis of society surely fiction has to be based on some truth…right…..
I literally pull out that argument everytime I talk to a Kaiser fan (which granted is very very occasional) but literally like he got psychology books to read to learn to manipulate people wtaf….Kaiser fans have no rights slandering other favs like you like THE opp BFFR
TABIEITA EDIT MY LOVES also omg I remember when this song had a chokehold on everyone it’s giving me flashbacks
Also IVE SEEN THAT ARTIST BEFORE KARASU HAIR DOWN PSLSLSLSLSL SHIDOU COME SAVE US
Ok now more general catch up I guess LOL HOWVE YOU BEEN???? Hope your midterms all went well!!!
- Karasu anon
HELPPP LMAOAOA not me syncing up w you subconsciously…black out days (by phantogram) was fr the soundtrack of my 2021 fall life i listened to it sooo much i heard it the other day and was like forcibly thrown back to that period of my life KSDJHF i felt like it fit with the theme though…because like the background is black…so it’s like black out days…haha…also it’s just like an aesthetic title (?? i think that’s the official name for that particular bit of text ?? no idea though) and i didn’t feel like digging for another song so this is what it is for this theme HAHA
ISN’T THE HEADER FIREEEEE UGHHHHHH sighing dreamily i think that’s one of the prettiest headers i’ve made like ever…so visually pleasing…so thematically appropriate (not that crows really have anything to do with the story but yk. karasu) KSJHFS okay so ngl it’s the header for my vague thoughts about repurposing my megumi royal au (which i already took down jic) where he’s the royal guard but for karasu LMAOO i know we discussed yukimiya for it hence my post about karasu or yukimiya but a) i will always pick karasu and b) look at these lines from the very first version of the royal au (technically the version i took down was the second version because i attempted a rewrite but the first version is what people remember most fondly) and tell me megumi doesn’t give HEAVY karasu vibes in them…like he actually feels more like karasu than himself KSJDHFHK (also these are in no particular order in terms of chronology LMAOO i just took random screenshots…there’s way more karasu-esque moments but image limit + trying to give you less to read so i picked a few highlights that show why karasu is actually lowkey the perf option) unfortunately royal aus are hard for me to stay motivated for so i was like “okay i’ll be responsible and not do this to myself” however i AM rewatching reign rn (kind of…one episode a week pace sadly) so that might get me in the headspace to work on it?? idk
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PUSS IN BOOTS KARASU SIGHHHH ugh he’s so handsome in literally everything but yeah him with the hat and the sword and everything LKDFJHW omg i need him…YES WE ARE APPROACHING THE END OF THE FALL SLUMP (hopefully) i am literally counting down the days i miss being motivated i literally haven’t posted any writing since the kaiser request i wrote a MONTH ago it’s disgusting
KARASU LOOKED SO GOOD LAST EP they’ve really been putting in the WORK to make him gorgeous they know what we the people want fr and we love them for it!! HELP i know what you mean the barousagi rivalry helps them grow and learn and whatnot ngl i don’t remember what the right word would be there either but it’s fine i got the concept FHKJSDLHK and yeah omg the itoshi bros continue to be unserious like i can definitely see why rin would be hurt in the moment because sae was admittedly very brutal but also like that’s the first time they’ve ever fought?? idk obviously you can’t expect a lot of emotional maturity out of kids but you’d think he’d at least think to himself “wow i wonder why my visibly unhealthy and traumatized looking brother is saying mean things to me after being alone in a foreign country for months” if not at that moment than at least later on since he’s constantly reflecting on that moment??? like again i acknowledge that sae was saying some CRAZY stuff and jokes aside i wouldn’t be THAT mean to my younger brother but at the same time rin had like 0 empathy for sae when he got back and my interpretation of sae in that moment is that rin basically kept poking at an obviously sore spot until sae snapped if that makes sense 🧐 but also blue lock insults are generally insane so idek if what sae was saying was actually that insane but anyways rin hanging onto it for years upon years and deciding he needs to crush and destroy sae is like next level hilarious to me BROOO it was not that deep ok but ngl this might be smth like how i don’t gaf abt the whole nagireo break up thing like i’ve said before the angst in bllk is just nonexistent to me except very select cases (cough snuffy cough) so i’m just like ok whatever about all of it
OAEUUU HELP I HAVEN’T THOUGHT ABT IT IN SO LONG i miss them…seeing aiku and niko on screen but never togehter is making my oaeu stan heart hurt #aikuniko(platonic)forever no because i always liked niko but oaeu has made me love him sm which is great because he’s really getting some moments in s2 and now i can rlly appreciate them
omg let’s replace all of the core four OPPS while we’re at it…no more itoshi bros + isagi + kaiser the only chemical reaction egoists we need are us two!!
LMAOAOA I DID FINISH!! i think part of it too was just me realizing i needed to give up on gege and accept that i had to come up with my own ending because honestly i finished around when shinjuku started becoming that weird repetitive cycle of fights and that gave me the courage to stop waiting for him to give me a satisfying ending and just become canon divergent…i can’t write a story if i don’t know the end beforehand which is why part 1 of pi was super quick for me — the “end” was planned in terms of the end of vol0 and her bringing yuta back to life!! but then i didn’t know where part 2 and everything with tullia that i set up was going to go until i had the vision of her dying to kill sukuna (also fun fact the way the title connects at the end with the blood like pomegranates was not in fact foreshadowed it just came to me as i was writing the epilogue…i don’t even remember where i got the idea for the title for atp but it was well before i even had the idea for the blood pact and all of that LMAOAO pi was one of those stories that genuinely wrote itself and came together perfectly as i went which made me seem like a foreshadowing genius but in fact it was just happy coincidence)
PLS omg i forget i wrote peregrine too sometimes so dw…i saw a screenshot on my camera roll of my peregrine era and i felt so nostalgic omg things were simpler back then i had like 300 followers or smth when i started it 😭 but yeah nagi really doesn’t have as much as you’d expect tbh!! and since this is such a long ask that likely no one will read i’ll admit that i think most people write him super ooc 😓 i can only stand MY version of nagi no one else has gotten that right balance of nagi vibes that make me like him in the first place so i end up lowkey annoyed because either he’s acting like an infant, a jackass, or a player and he really just is neither of those things…my complex is that i’m convinced no one understands my favs like i do but ESPECIALLY nagi like i think karasu is pretty well characterized for the most part?? people will make him more outgoing and flirty than i’d like but there’s some canon basis for it so i won’t complain but NAGIIII UGH nobody knows or loves him the way i know and love him #real #canon
INHERITANCE KINDA EATS RIGHT?? it gives a bit more horror movie vibes though (i think there’s actually a horror movie called inheritance maybe that’s why) but yeah tullia with karasu would’ve made me emo like wdym she gets my perfect handsome amazing man as a bf and i get shrek ninja 😭💔 okay wait speaking of tullia i was on tik tok earlier and i saw an edit of some anime idek the name but it’s like something something yamada level 9999 idfk (edit: my love story with yamada-lun at lv999…okay i was lowkey close) anyways i was like RIN AND TULLIA??????? it kinda opened my third eye because wait…not in pursuit but in another story why could i lowkey see it…
I MISS EDITS BEING MAJESTIC luckily i think people are starting to really put their souls into editing again which is really exciting OMG YES IT ALMOST IS SIX MONTHS THAT’S CRAZY we have had our ups and downs (aka grass touching and chronically online moments) in turn but truly there is no one i would yap more with and i do always miss you when one of us must vanish from the tumblr-verse briefly HAHA
SDKLJFHSD I’M SORRY THIS IS A VERY LONG RESPONSE TO YOUR ASK YOU WILL BE SCROLLING AND READING FOR SO LONG consider it like all of my thoughts for the past while that you were gone or smth idk I’M SORRY IN ADVANCE LMAOAO I’LL TRY NOT TO RAMBLE AS MUCH (we all know that’s like never happening though i am nothing if not a rambler)
i think my ds is in my armoire somewhere i’d have to look too HKSJFH but yes late night hangouts >>>
yeahhh ads and paywalls and monetization and whatnot really were the death of wattpad as well as the audience it inadvertently attracted 😩 being on wp is def a core memory but i will never go back (although i do miss the nice comments i used to get but it’s not worth it tbh)
I LOVE H / H READER’S TECHNIQUE i mean yk how it is in the miraverse with bird symbolism…h / h reader and karasu need to do a bird theme character meetup or smth (wait side note idk if you saw but apparently kaiser’s is supposed to be based on a tropical bird BRO STFU he doesn’t deserve the bird theme designation!!) HAHA but also YESSS THAT’S LIKE MY FAVORITE THING like the words i love you are never said in that story but it’s so so obvious because every single time they’re like “i want to kill you” “i want you to kill me” yeah…they’re obsessed!! and yeah you’re right i don’t really like writing smut or reading it that much nothing against people who do it’s just not my preferred genre!! but i LOVE writing metaphors for sex idk if that makes sense but like in hurricanes / hummingbirds with the whole dreams of fighting = sex dreams thing idk something about it feels so much more intimate than just outright saying she dreamt of getting railed especially given the dynamic between the two characters where it’s meant to be more figurative…like am i implying something more here or is she literally just dreaming of actually fighting him?? HAHAH something about writing romance in a non physical way will always do it for me when i was younger (think early high school) i read this random bit of writing advice that if your characters need to kiss to prove to the audience that they’re in love then you failed at writing two characters that are in love with each other and i INTERNALIZED that SKLFJHS like look at h / h there are 0 kiss scenes but they’re so clearly in love?? or even either version of bfb there’s one kiss in karasu’s version and i’m p sure none in otoya’s…same with the first part of fwtkac…and all of cherry tree/the sequel…as well as the kaiser request i just posted…also probably all of my work i just don’t really like writing love physically imo love in metaphors >>>>
actually fun fact i do want to be an author!! maybe some day LMAOOO rn i’m on my fanfic grind though but if i ever write a book or smth i’ll let you know
okay this is so unrelated but angry chipmunk karasu is just making me think and like…tabieitaken + alvin and the chipmunks trio costume LMAOOOOOO yuki is obviously simon otoya is theodore (because green) and ig karasu is alvin?? actually i think i’ve seen a fan art on here of karasu shidou and tokimitsu as alvin and the chipmunks with shidou as alvin karasu as simon and toki as theodore but i like the tabieitaken version better because idrc abt tokimitsu (although admittedly karasu in glasses is a beautiful sight)
HAHAHA OMG MY SILLY NAGI SKETCH one of my mutuals had posted one of yuta and was like “i encourage everyone to make shitty drawings of their favs” and i was like wait now i have to do one of nagi LMAOAOA also the way you phrased “your style” is cracking me up fsr it sounds like i’m an official fanartist with an actual style and shit…nagi’s hair is kinda annoying to draw ngl but it’s also fun at the same time?? he’s so silly i love him sm (if you couldn’t tell by now)
LMAOO I KNEW ITTTT shidou and karasu are real to ME and also IN CANON no because idk if you saw my post about them but i am so convinced that shidou thinks they are THE bestie duo of all time meanwhile karasu is like ugh this freak again but he secretly thinks shidou is kinda funny so he’s just like wtvr and lets the guy hang around with him 😭 rn i’m being overwhelmed by this intense love for nagi and rin as a duo actually like it’s genuinely driving me insane how perfectly they go together and NOBODY recognizes that somehow??? like first of all look at their visuals they’re literally gorgeous in a very opposite way but also let’s talk about how rin is very emotional whereas nagi is very detached. how rin exclusively likes horror and nagi likes lighthearted children’s cartoons and dramas and romcoms. rin who seems like he’ll be mean but is nice in his own rude little way and nagi who looks like a sweetheart but consistently says the most foul things with his expression like 🙂. rin who is SO LOVED by his family (specifically sae because we don’t know much abt his parents) but is furious over his perceived abandonment and nagi who was ACTUALLY abandoned but doesn’t even care and thinks it’s normal and that his parents do treat him well. the dark slimy destroyer aura that rin has and the shimmery mystical light death aura that nagi has. the way rin is called a monster and nagi is called a god. how rin is associated with saliva and blood and nagi is associated with bones and graves. how rin wants to be a genius and is always trying to live up to someone else’s expectations and how nagi never wanted to be a genius and is actively trying to escape everyone’s expectations. LKSDFHSLDKF JBSDLFKHBLDKJF LIKE SHUT UPPPPP WHY WOULD I CARE ABOUT NAGIREO AND RINSAGI WHEN THE MOST INSANE PARALLELS ARE STARING ME IN THE FACE???? not that i ship them or anything yk i don’t ship but I NEED a nagi + rin duo or something in the future or else i’m going to have to start another nagi series and make tullia end up with rin just so i can use it as an excuse to write about this further because i could literally go on about it for many more paragraphs and i see NO posts about it?? anyways this is like my fifth rant in this response omg this is going to take you so long to read i’m sorry 😩
bro idk what the animation team is cooking with aiku but honestly idrc about him so i’m happy LMAOOO like they’re doing karasu JUSTICE yukimiya JUSTICE barou JUSTICE nagi KIND OF JUSTICE (he looks better in the manga at this point but he’s also not had his best moments yet so i think we’ll be good also they’re making him rlly cute in the additional times so i can forgive the occasionally weird proportions)
WE WILL FIND THE IRL KARASUS AND YUKIS SOON #TRUST they definitely exist but (at least in my case) they’re not exactly the type of people you meet while wandering the streets at 2am on halloween ykwim 😭
okay but honestly i wouldn’t even mind them liking kaiser because okay go off problematic fav it’s whatever i liked mahito at one point so i get it but they are ALWAYS the ones with the weirdest most ridiculous morality police-type takes it’s CRAZY like bro your own favorite character would probably hate you!! also he is literally the epitome of everything you claim to hate in a character who doesn’t even have those characteristics?? like i can only speak to the nagi hate i see because i don’t really see karasu or barou hate (everyone loves them because they’re perfect) and idrc if people slander characters who aren’t my favs (otoya does get slander but it’s lowkey deserved and yuki gets slander from dude bros but they’re kinda right sometimes so i can’t be too mad like yeah yuki DID kinda fall off in the nel 😭) but it’s ALWAYS the kaiser fans having the most insane out of pocket literally incorrect takes and being proud of them and then being like “yeah kaiser is my fav” MICHAEL KAISER???? YOU HATE NAGI FOR BEING “MANIPULATIVE” AND SAE FOR BEING “UNEMOTIONAL” AND YOUR BLOG THEME IS MICHAEL KAISER??? actually idc abt sae slander that’s #funny but it’s the principle yk…enemy of my enemy is friend and whatnot…anyways it’s rough being a nagi stan nowadays sometimes it feels like i’m the only one 😩 i predict he’ll have a brief resurgence in fans depending on how well his goal is animated but it’ll be forgotten within like a week or two because then rin will score and THEN shidou will come on field and everyone will be talking about sae and shidou leaving nagi to only be relevant in my heart 💔
I WILL KEEP THIS SHORT GIVEN HOW MUCH I’VE BEEN CHATTING buttttt i’ve been pretty good!! just relaxing mostly HAHA my midterms went well thankfully!! i was sick when i took them and hardly studied but still slayed #nagicore now i have like a week and a half until thanksgiving break and then another week or two before my long ass winter break so i will be even more chronically online than i already am after the first week or two of december is over!! that’s about when i locked in with pi last year so maybe something will have a comeback or i’ll start something new or something who knows…hmm i feel like that’s about everything i’ve been up to OH actually i did drive to meet with one of my tumblr mutuals irl because they only live like an hour away from me?? that was fun we hung out for a bit and went out for food together it was kinda funny to meet them irl…we had been insta mutuals for a while as well so it wasn’t like we didn’t know each other whatsoever like they knew my govt name and what i looked like and vice versa before i pulled up so it wasn’t like a jump scare or anything but it was still like omg…you’re a real person…LMAOOOO but yeah other than that i’ve been spending my free time sleeping, occasionally watching tv or reading a book, and trying to write but failing miserably 😓 what about you??? besides the obvious tumblr struggles 😭
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minkdelovely ¡ 5 months ago
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ANOTHER INCREDIBLE CHAPTER BUT ARE WE REALLY SURPRISED??
I loved getting to know Edward — I don’t know if we’ll see him again, but he really took me by surprise. How do I have such fondness for a detective we just met? Maybe because he’s just so even keeled compared to KENNETH lmao (the day I call him Brady call the FBI or something cuz it means aliens took over my body)
The suspense just keeps building in such a delicious way! I know every week we get closer to the end but I’m honestly having too much fun living in the now even I can’t wait to go see our darling at the Golden Dish next week 😩✨
(Kenneth the whole chapter)
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✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧     ✧     ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧
Okay, I have paused reading to provide some fresh thoughts…
I don’t have a breakdown for the beginning of this fic, because I was just so caught up in how we’re exploring this new character, Edward Freeman. I think it’s no secret that I am a BIG FAN of exposition, and the opening of this chapter is such a fantastic example of it.
We immediately get a sense of who this man is and where he stands, how he views the world and the people around him. The mention of real-world events will get me every time, and The Crash and its impact has always fascinated me, so seeing how it’s being used here to bolster Edward’s worldview was just SOOOO satisfying.
Also the description of Tommy’s mom?? Watery eyed and shaking? I can see this poor woman so clearly, and I feel for her, even with all the context we have as the reader: that Tommy sucked and our collective Deer Husband killed him (and then we proceeded to fuck said husband as Tommy went cold on the floor). I guess I’m just trying to say that I’m constantly surprised at where we’re finding sympathy for characters as this story progresses, whether it’s toward someone established or brand new.
It’s the marker of a great author who really cares about everyone involved here, and I suppose I need to get real comfortable staying down here on the floor to worship at Hazel’s altar.
Brady’s bright blue eyes only get clearer and darker with every ounce of anger you inspired in him. An angry sea churning up violently behind his mean mug. He was practically sneering at you. 
AHHHH THERE YOU ARE, KENNETH
You remembered his hair well from that first meeting in front of the cafe. It clearly had become oily and weighed down from less frequent washing. The skin under his eyes was looking dark and thin. “You look like shit, by the way. Should sleep instead of bothering honest performers.”
AUTUMN!! This is a true “reader insert” moment right here
“Ha, there you are. True colors shining through finally.”
Kenneth you can’t say that, cuz I said it first??
“How was my mom? Not much of a talker.”
HA!!
His head turned with a crawl, weighted down with a steel ball of apprehensive horror, to look at Brady. He was leaning on the table with both elbows, staring at you like you’d busted out his car window and shot his dog. 
DAMNNN EDDIE IS SHOOK THE HOUSE DOWN BOOTS
Freeman looked at Brady with dead eyes, the shutdown of his feelings was an automatic attempt by his body to try and keep from grabbing Brady by the shirt in a fit rage, and turned the paper to reveal the name written to Brady. 
Am I… Edward Freeman…?
“What crime?”
“The one with the guy and the girl. It’s all in there.”
OHHH KENNETH. THIS IS NOT GOOD 😬
“What does that matter! It’s an illegal hooch den! Naked dancers! Race mixing! She admitted she-,” Brady was pacing a small three foot by three foot square in front of the desk. Freeman had his arms crossed while seated.
KENNETH “CLUTCHING MY PEARLS” BRADY
Freeman sighed, long and heavy. A huff of breath that somehow conveyed his disappointment better than words.
THE WAY I CAN HEAR THIS. Edward is so tired 😩
“I know she’s involved. I know her guy did it. And I know someone’s killing people. Lots of people.” He said it confidently into the corner of the office.
I just… hate how fucking right he is though
“One complaint about you and you’re being chained to a desk. Cut her loose, apologize, and go home. I don’t wanna see you anymore tonight. Your freaky little eyes are getting under my skin.” His captain removed his small rounded glasses and rubbed his hands down his face, exasperated his life had come to telling men to stop doing their jobs.
YOUR FREAKY LITTLE EYES ARE GETTING UNDER MY SKIN — I’M SCREAMING 😂🙈
With a scoff and a shake of your head, you found yourself, “No,  but I wish he had. What’s the point of being good if people assume the worst of you anyway?” Reaching out for his hand again, you held his large one in both of your smaller ones, “At least if he’d killed him I’d be sure Tommy’s never coming back to keep his promise.”
GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS
The paralysis set in as soon as the door was shut. You could hear Alastor’s name echoing around in your head, the sound so sharp it made fresh tears well. Brady had heard it, of course. It was for nothing. You worked so hard, kept his name off of your tongue despite the way it always felt so good there. 
UGHHHHH MY HEARTT
Brady wasn’t crazy, he was smart and lucky.
ain’t it the fucking truth 😩
Brady smiled, and for a moment you forgot how scary that should be. “No. You’re a liar and you’re aiding a criminal. But you work in a place I’m not supposed to bother. Luckily for me, Alastor’s work surely isn’t one.” Your eyes rolled. Hearing him say the name was like hearing a dog sing opera. Unsettling and unnatural. Perhaps a little impressive from a distance. Unfortunately you were front row and center.
KENNETH YOUR VITRIOL I SWEAR TO GODDD
Briefly he entertained grabbing you and violently shaking you until you confessed. He managed to find the strength to bury that down, mouth opening instead in preparation for words he didn’t have yet.
I SEE YOUR TRUE COLORS SHINING THROUGHHH🎶
Brady motioned with his thumb down the hall and said, “Your guy isn’t here to pick you up. Funny name by the way. I got a complaint for an Alastor last week. Socked some man for no good reason. Sounds like a violent fella, kinda guy with a temper when someone speaks I’ll of his lady, or fiancé, I’m told…Anyway, dropped the case since the guy wouldn’t give any more information but maybe I should follow up.”
WILLIAM. I knew I needed to remember you for a reason… I was wrong the last time, but I KNEW YOU WERE A SNAKE AND A BITCH
He didn’t move. He couldn’t let you take this moment from him. He’d made a massive victory in this personal war and your nonchalant attitude was making something in the back of his skull itch. Somewhere beneath his bone. A new sensation.
MY LORD THIS MAN IS PISSED 😰
A man unable to control his face was often a man unable to control his hands.
OH MY GOD
“This won’t end like you think it will.” He said it too loudly for how close he was to you, “It never does for the women.” He stopped at the station’s front desk and leaned into the glossy wooden counter, “Oh! I almost forgot! Congrats on the engagement.”
Kenny you can’t be cunt… don’t make me like you because you’re cunt 😩
Like a leak in the hull of your iron-sided ship, it seemed the second Ruth so sweetly dripped that name into Brady’s waiting maw the ocean was spilling in. Every time you heard it fall from another person’s mouth the breach in your metal barriers tore wider. If the Titanic could sink in calm weather what luck did Alastor and you have in the tempest of Brady’s fervor?
Words do not exist to articulate what this whole paragraph means to me… but you know Hazel 🥺♥️
He shook his head and handed you the card, “He said,” a pause as his eyes rolled up to search for the exact words, “to tell the host you’re there for him. Called it the Golden Dish, but the card doesn’t mention anything like that…. Sorry, I didn’t think to ask more questions. Like I said, he seemed out of sorts.”
I NEED TO HUG HIM IMMEDIATELY
What was the Golden Dish? And who was kissing Alastor’s business cards?
AAHHHH!! I THINK I KNOW WHO IT IS 👀✨
A Doe in Fall (Part 12)
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⟢HumanAlastor x FemaleBurlesquerReader - A Doe in Fall
A burlesquer with a penchant for conning men, you find your latest game interrupted when your next mark saves you from an aggressive fan— by killing him. The chance encounter left you curious, still half convinced you could complete your normal chase. Unbeknownst to you, you were the one being tracked.
Part 1 - Pretty in Red smut💦 Part 2 - Liar smut💦 Part 3 - A Tragedy smut💦 Part 4 - Enough Part 5 - Too Much Part 6 - Learning smut💦 Part 7 - Recognition smut💦 Part 8 - Trust sexual 🥵 Part 9 - Shiny Things Part 10 - Good Deeds Part 11 - Caught Part 12 - Eddie📍
Part 12 Eddie
Brady tried to cut some corners to bring you and Alastor down but ends up just hurting himself.
「Warnings/Promises: Human Alastor x Fem!Reader, still not smut cuz we’re waiting for the special moment, po-po, 5-0, down at the gun club, not an accurate portrayal of 1930s New Orleans Leadership, mystery kisses, brief thoughts of violence, illiteracy, @minkdelovely」
MDNI 👮 🚓
Edward Freeman met Kenneth Brady when the younger man was partnered with him. He was bright eyed, and had a sense of justice Freeman appreciated. He was already tired of the rigamarole of police work, so the fresh energy reinvigorated his early days and long nights. It was rather pointless though, police work, given the people in charge weren’t fans of cracking down on the illegal booze business. It was making too much money under the tables and in handshakes.
The nation was still reeling from the crash of the market nearly two years prior. Any way to get ahead, to stay with your chin above the rising waters, well… what harm is there really in feeding your family? The end justifies the means, right? And Brady didn’t seem to disagree too much with that sentiment. 
So when the typically stringent, but otherwise soft spoken and relaxed, Brady began to…devolve into someone a little too myopic, Freeman wasn’t quite sure how to handle him. They’d been rather laissez-faire about the morality of things for so long. They tried to keep violence at a minimum so their fellow citizens could enjoy their city. That was the extent of it. But, Brady was becoming obsessed. 
It started normally enough. Brady bringing up a missing husband. Later on, a missing bartender. Soon he was snooping on to other’s cases, convinced something was connecting them. 
But, given the times and the character of such people, well, Freeman couldn’t quite understand Brady’s fervor. Sure. Some of them probably ended up under backyards and in the water. Hell, quite a few of them he’d have helped do away once he got the real dirt on them. A conspiracy? Or a mass killer? That seemed implausible at best. There was simply no indication of a grande scheme. 
Brady kept pushing. Walking the streets at night with ears open and eyes peeled, for any inkling of what was going on. 
He just couldn’t accept that sometimes people leave town or jobs. Very few of them were actually reported by loved ones, even the ones that had them.
Then came along the widow Dupre, watery eyed and shaking about her missing adult son. Who, from what they’d uncovered, was a real piece of work.
Freeman let Brady start his investigation, but as it became clear he was adding it to his pile of random disappearances, Freeman had to step away. He could see the obsession ruining his friend. 
At a rare dinner with the families, the stress on Brady’s wife’s face was visible for all to see. She cornered Freeman in the kitchen when he went for more coffee, asking if Brady was stepping out on her or if he truly had been working so hard on something big. 
He hardly knew what to say. Neither were true. He’d been working late, but on a wild goose chase. 
When he dragged a clean cut and confused woman into the station, Freeman knew he’d really lost the fucking plot. 
“She’s his accomplice. I know it. Her fella is the man. I’ve got him fingered.” Brady pointed at you through the closed door. You weren’t listening to their voices in the hall, the name still ringing in your head. The name you'd both sacrificed to keep secret. 
Alastor.
Freeman hissed, “You can’t arrest people for knowing a guy! A boogie man at that, Kenny. Come on.” 
“I have her confession for prostitution. It’s all clean and by the book. And, I have a witness.” Brady tapped Freeman’s arm with the back of his hand and led him down the hall to another room, “He saw her and her guy throw a body in the river.”
Well, shit.
“You found a body? The Dupre son?” Freeman considered what he’d said. The river? Why the river? Bodies didn’t always make it to the sea. It’d be a sloppy misstep for this supposed murderous mastermind.
Brady sighed, his parade a little rained on. “...No, but I have a witness right there. And, I got the name of her fella. I just need to find which station he’s at and I’m off to the races. I bet you my house this guy’s good for it.”
Ah, so. He had next to nothing. Freeman just nodded and took a calming breath. “Alright, are we starting with the woman or this guy?”
“Oh, for sure her.” Bready turned to open the door, but Freeman shot his hand out to stop him. 
“And this is the one who gave you the runaround?” Freeman had heard so much about you already, he wanted to prepare himself for whatever tricky shrew was waiting for him. He followed his partner through the door and took you in fully. Your stare was distant and glassy. You’d been crying and you seemed to be shaking slightly from the cold of the room as fall’s night air slipped in through the window. 
You could, reasonably, be his daughter. A similar age for sure, similar build, same hair color. Same penchant for the wrong kinda guy, apparently.
He recalled all of the ways Brady had spoken about you. The image in his head was a bird faced woman with sharp eagle eyes and tight lips. Someone decidedly ugly with a permanent scowl and mischief behind quick glances.
And here was a woman, vulnerable and quite nice to look at it. Hair obviously groomed well when not manhandled by cops, and a rather handsome dress which indicated a good personality by the current standards. The shoulders had flat bows that let their ribbons fall onto your bare shoulders. Feminine. Suitable. Not much skin showing. otherwise. A burlesquer seemed to the kind who didn’t wear clothes often, but he supposed everyone has a work uniform after all. Even the nude dancers. Who was he to judge you for your professional clothing requirements? You were here and modest and that’s what mattered.
He took a seat, sliding the folder Brady had set down into the space in front of him. “I hear you’re not too fond of disclosing your personal information.”
It had been several hours since you’d arrived, and now they chose to grace you with their presence? You’d been tossed into a room and left alone for so long, it seemed more like punishment than bureaucracy.
Brady’s bright blue eyes only get clearer and darker with every ounce of anger you inspired in him. An angry sea churning up violently behind his mean mug. He was practically sneering at you. 
“Can you blame me? The men in this city are certifiable. Case in point, this hound you call a cop.” You had the forethought to keep your shoulders pulled inward, gesturing with your chin.
“Detective.” Brady corrected. 
“Same thing, jackass.” Eyes rolling, you pushed back against the chair causing the front legs to lift for a second. Returning your glare to him, you honed in on the messy details. You remembered his hair well from that first meeting in front of the cafe. It clearly had become oily and weighed down from less frequent washing. The skin under his eyes was looking dark and thin. “You look like shit, by the way. Should sleep instead of bothering honest performers.”
“Ha, there you are. True colors shining through finally.”
“How was my mom? Not much of a talker.”
“Fu-,” Brady flinched forward, chair squeaking against the linoleum floor. It took a tensing of your arms to keep from openly reacting.
“Ya’ll, enough. Now, don’t be too sour with us. We’re just working off your own words,” Freeman opened the folder to find your confession. It had been typed nice and neat and labeled DOE, JANE. He turned it to you briefly, eyebrows hitching as if to ask if you remembered it. You glanced at it long enough to see the conversation and names and nodded. Yes, you’d had that conversation. Brady must have typed it mostly from memory, you thought, or he had some quick shorthand. He brought it back to face him and as his eyes roamed the sheet, his shoulders stiffened. He wasn’t seeing what he was expecting. “Could you-?,” he motioned for Brady to point out the part of your last conversation that constituted a confession. Brady tapped a line of text. 
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BRADY - Tell me about the dates Tommy arranged. DOE, JANE - Apparently many of the dancers agreed, got a cut. I had no idea about it until he introduced me to a man who was very forward. I insulted him and ran off. Lost Tommy good money, apparently. BRADY - And who was that? DOE, JANE - S something. Mister Stein? I honestly wasn’t listening much after I realized what was happening. BRADY - And then he knocked you around? DOE, JANE - Yeah. Got me good. BRADY - And… the next date. Last time anyone saw Tommy. Tell me about that. DOE, JANE - Tommy said he’d kill me if I didn’t go. So I did. Promised me he’d stay with me for protection. But as soon as he got his money he left.
Freeman’s head lifted slowly from the paper to look at you over the folder, across the table. Your arms were crossed, makeup smeared and running with long dried tears. Your hair mussed. His head turned with a crawl, weighted down with a steel ball of apprehensive horror, to look at Brady. He was leaning on the table with both elbows, staring at you like you’d busted out his car window and shot his dog. 
“Can I speak to you for a moment?” He pushed back, resting his hand on Brady’s shoulder and walking out. In the small room that looked into the interrogation room where the male witness fidgeted, he set the folder and your words down. 
He motioned for Brady to close the door behind him. As soon as the latch clicked into place, he smacked the table. 
“That isn’t a confession! It’s a fucking victim statement, Kenny.” He looked through the one way glass at the man seated, “And he wrote a witness report?” He gestured with his head, the man Brady called Joseph sat quietly waiting for their return. His clothes were pulling at the seams, his fingernails crusted with dirt. 
Brady nodded, “Yeah. He came in yesterday and after he told me what he saw he wrote it down there and signed.” He was pointing to a piece of paper he’d left on the same table Kenny was now trying to use for stability. Trying was the keyword. His disbelief was dizzying. 
A small laugh, petulant and bordering annoyed, left his lips. He grabbed a pen, wrote something down, and brushed past him. Freeman marched into the witness room, Brady closely following behind.
“Sir, do me a favor and check I’ve spelt your name properly on this paperwork please.” He held it up. The man looked, found where Freeman's finger was pointing, and nodded.
Freeman looked at Brady with dead eyes, the shutdown of his feelings was an automatic attempt by his body to try and keep from grabbing Brady by the shirt in a fit rage, and turned the paper to reveal the name written to Brady. 
Josanna. Written neatly in block letters. 
Without breaking eye contact with Brady, “And just refresh my memory, sir, what was your statement in regards to again?”
Joseph cleared his throat, “I saw it happen. Down by the river.”
“Saw what happen?”
“The crime.”
“What crime?”
“The one with the guy and the girl. It’s all in there.”
Freeman shoved the written statement into Brady’s chest, “You have half a second to get to the captain’s office before I do.” 
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“That man can’t even read his own name let alone write. From what I can tell he’s a random homeless you plied with confiscated booze. What is going on with you?” The gray haired man bellowed from his chair, hands resting on a large pot belly. 
“What does that matter! It’s an illegal hooch den! Naked dancers! Race mixing! She admitted she-,” Brady was pacing a small three foot by three foot square in front of the desk. Freeman had his arms crossed while seated.
“A victim told you she was assaulted. And I-,” the captain leaned back in his chair, “You know exactly how we feel about the wet spots in this city. The, uh, race thing is another issue but— Kenny, you’re one more rogue act from losing your beat. Do you not get that?”
“Rogue? I’m doing legitimate police work. I’m investigating crime! What the fuck is happening here?!” He stopped pacing long enough wave an apology to his boss for the language. 
Freeman sighed, long and heavy. A huff of breath that somehow conveyed his disappointment better than words.
“I decide what constitutes police work and this is not that.” His boss shook his chair side to side, thinking about how to get Brady in line. “It comes straight from the commissioner and the mayor above him. We aren’t to hound the bars under our purview.”
‘I’m not!” He started up pacing again, hands up and open in genuine confused frustration. 
“You’re harassing their dancers! Stalking around their establishments at night freaking people out!” He laughed in disbelief, “Her manager is outside now. Had to shut down for the night because of your little show.”
Brady put his hands on his hips and faced away from the captain. His face enough alone to have him dismissed. 
“I know she’s involved. I know her guy did it. And I know someone’s killing people. Lots of people.” He said it confidently into the corner of the office.
“Kenny. Enough.” Freeman shook his head and stood to leave. 
“One complaint about you and you’re being chained to a desk. Cut her loose, apologize, and go home. I don’t wanna see you anymore tonight. Your freaky little eyes are getting under my skin.” His captain removed his small rounded glasses and rubbed his hands down his face, exasperated his life had come to telling men to stop doing their jobs.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
While you were here anyway, and Brady shooed off Joseph, Freeman decided to speak with you again. He offered you a nod and took Brady’s seat.
It was hard to be friendly, you found. Every minute or so you had to sniffle, nose running long after the tears dried up. Your eyelashes stuck together when you blinked.
“I’m afraid I didn’t get your name, sir.” You sniffled again, hands warming your arms.
Freeman leaned over and offered you his hand, “Detective Eddie Freeman.” You shook it, keeping your hand rather limp to give the appearance of weakness.
“I just-,” he laughed as he set his hand on the table, clicking his ring twice out of habit, “I gotta ask. Did your fella kill Tommy? Are you in some kinda trouble?”
With a scoff and a shake of your head, you found yourself, “No,  but I wish he had. What’s the point of being good if people assume the worst of you anyway?” Reaching out for his hand again, you held his large one in both of your smaller ones, “At least if he��d killed him I’d be sure Tommy’s never coming back to keep his promise.”
Your mother always taught you to make yourself small. Remind the people you needed to believe you that you were not a threat. Play the part they always pigeon holed you into. It was easier than fighting the assumptions. There was power in deception. 
“Your pal is really ruining my life. Even more than Tommy.” You squeezed, 30% strength.  
When you looked up at him, he could only find you to be the image of pitiful girl, “Let me check some things and I’ll have Kenny sending you on your way, miss-?”
“Doe.”
“Right.” His ring rapped against the bright wooden door frame, two times, and your brief time knowing Freeman ended. 
The paralysis set in as soon as the door was shut. You could hear Alastor’s name echoing around in your head, the sound so sharp it made fresh tears well. Brady had heard it, of course. It was for nothing. You worked so hard, kept his name off of your tongue despite the way it always felt so good there. 
Conjured images of Alastor barging into the police station haunted you. What would he say in anger? Brady wasn’t crazy, he was smart and lucky. Nothing could be worse. Alastor could say anything while mad, and Brady could make conclusions he had no business jumping to.
And then he was there in the room with you, and you had to return to the moment and try to calibrate yourself. Who were you now? He already knew you weren’t the damsel in distress, he knew you weren’t weak and frail. Right?
Maybe you’d just be yourself, like you’d let slipped earlier. Your mouth opened and his hand flew up, “Don’t. Shut it.”
“Excu-”
“I’ve been told to apologize and send you home.”
“Oh? And are you?”
Brady smiled, and for a moment you forgot how scary that should be. “No. You’re a liar and you’re aiding a criminal. But you work in a place I’m not supposed to bother. Luckily for me, Alastor’s work surely isn’t one.” Your eyes rolled. Hearing him say the name was like hearing a dog sing opera. Unsettling and unnatural. Perhaps a little impressive from a distance. Unfortunately you were front row and center.
Time with you felt so rare, he wanted to keep you a little longer but couldn’t think of what to say or do. Briefly he entertained grabbing you and violently shaking you until you confessed. He managed to find the strength to bury that down, mouth opening instead in preparation for words he didn’t have yet. 
“Can I go home now?” Rubbing your arms to make it clear how uncomfortable you were, you cut him off like he had you. Not that he had anything to say. 
Brady motioned with his thumb down the hall and said, “Your guy isn’t here to pick you up. Funny name by the way. I got a complaint for an Alastor last week. Socked some man for no good reason. Sounds like a violent fella, kinda guy with a temper when someone speaks I’ll of his lady, or fiancé, I’m told…Anyway, dropped the case since the guy wouldn’t give any more information but maybe I should follow up.”
“Are you so sure I have one, a guy that is?” You simply couldn’t admit Alastor was yours. Never. Not for Brady. “No one’s coming for me. No one’s punched anyone for me either. Though, I’m flattered you think I’m worth the charge. Am I free to leave?” The little tug of your lips into a halfhearted grin warmed you. It was thrilling, lying to his face when you both knew the truth.
He didn’t move. He couldn’t let you take this moment from him. He’d made a massive victory in this personal war and your nonchalant attitude was making something in the back of his skull itch. Somewhere beneath his bone. A new sensation.
A brief and violent flash of knocking the smirk off your tear stained face startled him. You noticed him swallow hard, expression shifting from amused to bewildered. From the outside, all you could read was a frightened widening of his eyes.
“Brady…? If you’re waiting for some man to collect me, I’ll be here all night.” Your voice was softer now, while you couldn’t uncover what was happening in his head, you could tell he was in some kind of turmoil.
A man unable to control his face was often a man unable to control his hands.
His legs lifted his body up and dragged him over to the door.  He opened it, slowly, before leaning against the wall beside it to ensure you passed him in close quarters. He knew he couldn’t keep you there forever.
Maybe this Alastor was a real rough fellow. So cruel he wouldn’t even care if his dame was in a bind. The kind of man to abandon his closest allies when cornered. Maybe he really wasn’t coming for you. Which was fine, he told himself. He’d be seeing him soon.
Following you out, he took the walk as an opportunity to warn you again.
“This won’t end like you think it will.” He said it too loudly for how close he was to you, “It never does for the women.” He stopped at the station’s front desk and leaned into the glossy wooden counter, “Oh! I almost forgot! Congrats on the engagement.”
Turning to say a harsh good night, you caught yourself and turned back, exiting through the station doors without another word to him. No need for polite pleasantries anymore. The game was well and truly over for you. 
“Oh thank god,” Johnny was sitting on the steps of the station and jumped to his feet when you came out, a sight you weren’t expecting. You stopped, confused. He smiled seeing your brows knit and eyes wander past him in search of someone else, “I was going to bail you out but they said there wasn’t any need. Alastor is waiting for you.” 
Like a leak in the hull of your iron-sided ship, it seemed the second Ruth so sweetly dripped that name into Brady’s waiting maw the ocean was spilling in. Every time you heard it fall from another person’s mouth the breach in your metal barriers tore wider. If the Titanic could sink in calm weather what luck did Alastor and you have in the tempest of Brady’s fervor?
“Oh…,” you tried to hide the dejection. He sent Johnny? That was smart, but, why did it sting?
Perhaps it was his six sisters, or maybe he was genuinely a good man, but Johnny’s heart ached at the pitiful tone. He leapt up two steps, “He wanted to come! But I told him it was a bad idea. Tempers and all that. Don’t need any more issues for you tonight. Though admittedly he didn’t seem mad, necessarily.”
A slow nod. Johnny told Alastor what to do? Your eyes looked to the left, that was an odd mental image.
“Thanks, Johnny. I need to return to the theater first.” Your hand reached out for his arm and gave it a squeeze, “I appreciate you.”
“Dont mention it. And your bag is with Alastor.” He let his hand come to yours, “He’s kind of a mess, that one.”
You tensed, accidentally pinching his arm in a flit of panic before drawing it back, “Did he drive home like that?”
He shook his head and handed you the card, “He said,” a pause as his eyes rolled up to search for the exact words, “to tell the host you’re there for him. Called it the Golden Dish, but the card doesn’t mention anything like that…. Sorry, I didn’t think to ask more questions. Like I said, he seemed out of sorts.”
You looked down to inspect it, nervous at the sudden introduction of a paper trail. Nodding, you finally took it with both hands. The face was rather plain: an address in the corner with just the number and street, and an interlocked G and D in the center. Turning it over, you found a pink lipstick kiss stained haphazardly across the back and a small squiggle. Your thumb ran over the clipped right bottom corner. 
What was the Golden Dish? And who was kissing Alastor’s business cards?
⋅˚₊‧ ଳ⋆Masterlist.ೃ࿔*:・
˖ ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖
@eris-norwega @reath-solia @catticora , @angelicribbons , @xalygatorx
@cxrsedwxrlds , @nonetheartist , @tsunaki , @janchei , @moonmark98
, @readergirlstuff , @berry-demon , @chirimeimei , @fairyv-ice , @olive-frog ,
@thonethatflies620 , @tiredkiwiii , @ilikemyteawithmilk , @whateverlololo , @psipies
@howabouticallyou , @roxxie-wolf , @fizzled-phoenix , @star-kujo-platinum
, @a-case-of-attachment, @multifandomfanatic02 @watereddownmilk , @bontensbabygirl @smoky000
@hoebihoeshi , @pansexual-opera-house , @polytheatrix , @lorddiabigmommymilkers , @backinthefkingbuildingagain
@harley2223-blog , @poinappel , @midnightnoiserose , @spookieroz , @missmidorima ,
@ivebeenthearchersstuff , @downbadforfictionalppl , @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx , @sleepylittledemon , @aether-th3-enby
@dontfuckbutimfab @breathlessaura , @aperfectidiot , @certainlygay , @jth12
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bayalexison ¡ 2 years ago
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗
Hey, thanks for the ask itsmoonpeaches! So I think I'm gonna rec my more recent-ish fics (ones I actively worked no more than 7 years ago). In no particular order:
-Foul Play: My Grimsley and Nanu become bros Pokemon fic. There were some pacing issues at the beginning few chapters, but I enjoyed writing the heck of them and also I think I did good with Pokemon battles. I'll return to it when Fire Emblem hasn't taken a chokehold of me lmao.
-Dancing With Butterflies and Dragons: My Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice fic. After playing the game, I got interested how Amara and Dhurke got back together briefly and that was how the fic was made. I remember really paying attention to the emotional descriptions and it paid off as I was surprised at some of the comments I got!
-Thunder Without Rain: I wrote this for the Dimileth Big Bang and it's pregnancy fic with politics thrown in. My big love letter to Dimileth and as I like to call it, "a big baby boy" fic lol. Sometimes I get upset my fic didn't get as much engagement or recs as the other Dimileth Big Bang fics (just two kudos to 100 yoooo), but there are folks that quite enjoyed it and I need to remember that including the artist I was partnered with.
-Counting Stars: Another Dimileth fic I wrote for the Dimileth Winter Exchange. Dimitri and Byleth take a romantic getaway and then have a special surprise when they get back. ; ) Perhaps one of my fluffest Dimileth fics there.
-Big Joys: FE Engage F!Alear/Alfred fic. The premise is Alfred and Alear are trying to start a family but have been struggling and that causes Alfred to be very anxious. Challenged mysef to write a bit of Alfred angst and oh my gosh I'm so sorry Alfred. Somehow I wrote 10K of the draft in less than a week. I actually got a lovely unexpected comment from a reader who relates Alfred and is expecting (or maybe they already had their baby lol). Plus there's not much F!Alear/Alfred fanworks compare to M!Alear/Alfred, so spreading the F!Alear/Alfred agenda lol
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maaaxx ¡ 2 years ago
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how do you feel about fanart?
If anyone ever makes fanart of any of my fics ill marry them on the spot.
I'm usually really weird about fanart and turn down people who ask about it because of the whole situation with 'my' oc's )iykyk) but we got that sorted out so now I'm okay with it.
There was another anon a while back who asked about fanart but Tumblr ate like half my asks a few weeks ago and i lost that ask. but if i remember correctly that ask was asking for descriptions and stuff so I'm just going to tag that onto here too.
ALL of the 'ocs' listed are originally from the art of burning by hella 1975 (just letting yall know).
I just have my own twist on them but the names and general ideas belong to hella :)
Tomkin <3333 (my fav)
if some of these turn into a tangent because their appearances are reflective of their personalities just ignore that.
Tomkins described vaguely in chapter 2 as this:
"He was skinny.  Like far more than the rest of the people he had seen.  But he seemed to have a lot of lean muscle.  He was maybe half a foot taller than Zuko and had a huge smile plastered on his face.  That seemed to be permanent though, as he was smiling every time he saw him.  He also seemed to be the only one without beads in his hair, which was tied half up, with a strand on each side braided back.  He was slightly darker skinned than the rest of the people, and his eyes were the deepest blue.  They were the exact same color as the ocean."
Tomkins 16 at this time, 17 currently. So he's shaped a bit awkwardly, longish limbs. Hes also tall for his age. almost the same height as Nanook (who is 2 years older) and Nanook is only a few inches from Hakodas height (I think) so do with that what you will.
Something that I developed since writing the above description is that Tomkin has multitextured hair. Its about medium brown and is all over the place and its mostly like very wavy but it curls at a few random places. He also switches between having his hair like halfway up and in like a ponytail.
I also dont know how youd incorporate this into fanart but Tomkins pretty.
Thats consistent with most people we're going to see describing Tomkin is that he's attractive but not in your typical like, masculine, handsome, way but instead hes attractive in a pretty way,,, idk. but that comes up a lot eventually (because of a certain topic thats going to come up a lot) so i thought it might be worth mentioning.
His clothes are also usually slightly too short for him because my dude is still growing.
Nanook <33 my other fav.
I dont think Nanook is described anywhere.
He has like pin point straight and its also very messy but unlike Tomkin its more so in a way of he doesnt put an effort into keeping it tied back right. like when you tie a ponytail back and dont fix it for the rest of the day. He has two braids one on each side of his face. his right side braid has one beed on it, left side has two. these are also lazily tied back with the rest of his hair.
Nanook has a scar right at his hairline on the right side of his face too.
besides that, Nanooks just like your average dude. Hes not skinny but hes not overly broad, like i said, hes a few inches shorter than Hakoda.
I think it's mentioned somewhere that he has big eyes. So idk what to do with that.
He's not that interesting to look at lmao.
Chena
Chenas about Chitsangs height and a little less broad.
idk how good of a reference 'chitsangs height' is but he's pretty tall.
his hair is about to the top of his back and has two braids on one side of his head. the rest of his hair is like half tied up in a wolfs tail.
ummmmm idk what else is that important for him.
moving on
Kanuk
Kanuk is a tad bit older than hakoda, so he has a few gray hairs. He has a really skruffy beard which also has some grays in it.
Something to remember about Kanuk is that he's originally from the nwt so his clothes reflect that. the color is a lot more of that bold purply ish color.
Kanuk, like hakoda, is a short king and is about the same height as hakoda.
he constantly looks tired and kind of has that worn look to him. zuko puts him through a lot lol.
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baekhvuns ¡ 2 years ago
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Omg I'm sorry you had to answer me on your laptop, I don't know why my message is cursed, hopefully this one is normal - BUT WHY CAN'T I LINK SHIT ANYMORE 🔫
Well PSG tried, but didn't not succeed, Bayern defeating more of your faves. Bayern outsold lmaooo. Also Tottenham is out (so sad 🥰), Chelsea is doing something...? Liverpool went insane mode, maybe we shouldn't have mocked them before, I feel bad for MU, but also can't stop laughing at the score. HOWEVER Liverpool better be doing better in PL only, they're playing RM soon and I need them to be shit <3
Premier League has always been more interesting to me than La Liga, but CL is still the most interesting and unpredictable
Fake ass fans, even I know his full name even though I'm a hater https://twitter.com/Kindinzin/status/1633433110657265671?t=rIRz46_drH7z_WfwdcxMoA&s=19 I'm gonna start calling him Ricardo from now on
I think kpop is at its peak of popularity rn, because the amount of random kpop and kpop stans spotting I've had in the past 3 years is crazy! However, kpop is not mainstream at all, sure most people understand what kpop means, may have heard of BTS or BP, but that's about it. And that's fine! Hybe thinks they're the heroes, but they're actually acting like villains, honestly the whole back and forth between both companies is childish as hell, I hate SM, but Hybe is really ruining shit.
Yunho Parisian??? I'm awful cause my first thought was "you should be happy you're leaving Paris, don't cry" https://twitter.com/atzxmxxshx/status/1633617809732419584?t=NHmFuJloyP26WzTNSlOJhw&s=19 btw Paris I blew my Korean friends' minds, they had no idea Paris was that small. It's ridiculous how small it is compared to other big cities in Europe. I haven't eaten spotted dick cause I've been vegetarian for ages before going vegan and even if I still consumed meat you wouldn't catch me eating that shit! I've seen the Jolly x HongSan video, but HJ and his hatred for veggies is so pathetic... is he 10? Maybe that's why he didn't grow
Omg I can imagine Canadians treated you badly when you first arrived :( how old were you?
I'm suddenly more interested in hockey player Hwa! But not as interested as I am in villain Y/N 🥰
DO YOU SEE THE SPRING SUMMER 2023 IN THE 2ND PHOTO?! https://twitter.com/hwaupdates/status/1634105059675107328?t=PxicAWQT-l-xL-U7HrFw6w&s=19 MODEL!
Saikers sounds like Psychos lol, I'm worried about their fandom name now 😬
https://twitter.com/byeonbang_tiny/status/1631929720517574662?t=_6tbRTRi5sEmWHO_oPz7tg&s=19 OP claimed Atz won't last long then said some bullshit to save face. They perform more overseas? No shit, there are so many countries djwjssjjsjdnsnnajss do they want 5 Seoul stops or a whole ass Korean tour?! Plus what about music shows, award shows, festivals... so entitled. And apparently Ktinys are hated by security. Hmmm I wonder why https://twitter.com/allabout_atz/status/1634115890634719234?t=oyCp3k9polmr4pGb89c4Fg&s=19 imo they're not hated enough. Shame I didn't show up with a baseball bat, but I'm in Busan right now. And KQ management is ignoring Korean fans?! 😭 miss you're a weirdo who doesn't respect their privacy, sit down
Finally the tour is over, worst weeks of my life!!! We're safe until they announce another one... apparently they're going to perform in SEA, I can't be mad, cause they're often omitted. They'll probably have a cb as well, which is bad for me, since I should focus on work, but I need to perceive Seonghwa 😭
SICK https://twitter.com/finelineateez/status/1633011361335894021?t=LqLhP52C4_s6MiShNhwAEw&s=19 the binders the pcs came with cost less than $20 so let that sink in 💀
And I took all of these photos https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1633804911778598912?t=JI5pKD-zPWaNdXh-jBSfAA&s=19 - thinking of traveller Hwa fic...
The JK stalker wtf?! Why tf do people like this exist and why aren't they separated from the society
Lmao some of the early lighstick designs were crazy and ugly, but fun. We still have some funny ones now, but there's little to no creativity. I'm still sad the new Lightiny is bald, and not the best quality. And all the white sticks may look neat, but soooooo boring - DV 💖
hello!!!
Omg I'm sorry you had to answer me on your laptop, I don't know why my message is cursed, hopefully this one is normal - BUT WHY CAN'T I LINK SHIT ANYMORE 🔫 /// Well PSG tried, but didn't not succeed, Bayern defeating more of your faves. Bayern outsold lmaooo. Also Tottenham is out (so sad 🥰), Chelsea is doing something…? Liverpool went insane mode, maybe we shouldn't have mocked them before, I feel bad for MU, but also can't stop laughing at the score. HOWEVER Liverpool better be doing better in PL only, they're playing RM soon and I need them to be shit &lt;3
omg no don’t apologize it’s not u iTS TUMBLR 😭😭 ever since tumblr had it’s new update i can’t seem to access certain asks and all so whenever i try to copy paste my answers on the app it just doesn’t post if i don’t do it on the laptop 🔫🔫🔫
i can always count on bayern to absolute demolish my favourites <33 but tbh, idk if u noticed but hasn’t this season’s bayern has been a little weak,,, as in it’s quite easy to get into their heads and defence and borussia is actually on it’s way to win bundesliga 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ tottenham, are we surprised </3 the memes about the score are so funny 😭😭😭 ten hag waking the players up at 8 in the morning for training LMFAOOOOO what a day i can’t believe how easily they did it???? lIKE WERE MU PLAYING AT ALL?? OOOO UR RIGHT THE RM V LIVAPOOL that’ll be fun to watch, either a disappointment or a surprise fhwjdhjd
Premier League has always been more interesting to me than La Liga, but CL is still the most interesting and unpredictable //// Fake ass fans, even I know his full name even though I'm a hater https://twitter.com/Kindinzin/status/1633433110657265671?t=rIRz46_drH7z_WfwdcxMoA&s=19 I'm gonna start calling him Ricardo from now on
la liga is going downhill, and has been ever since r7 and messi left,,, la liga is full of benzema being a drama queen, PL is so funny they’re just randomly fighting on the field and ligue un….tragic, there is no privacy at that finished club, EVERYTHING IS REVEALED even the shit in the locker rooms 😭😭😭 NAHHHHHH EVEN FAKE FANS KNOW HIS HAME HOW TF THEY GOT RICARDO OUT OF THAT 😭😭😭 i like what the japanese fans call neymar they call him “neymaru!!” 😭😭
I think kpop is at its peak of popularity rn, because the amount of random kpop and kpop stans spotting I've had in the past 3 years is crazy! However, kpop is not mainstream at all, sure most people understand what kpop means, may have heard of BTS or BP, but that's about it. And that's fine! Hybe thinks they're the heroes, but they're actually acting like villains, honestly the whole back and forth between both companies is childish as hell, I hate SM, but Hybe is really ruining shit.
UR RIGHT UR RIGHT “However, kpop is not mainstream at all” BUT THIS >>>>>> kpop is still seen as a niche, western artistsjust be trying to expand into the asia market thru them, like anime for japan and kpop for korea and tbh it’s nice like that! with the more kpop fans the worse it gets on twt tbh,, the sm hybe community seems a little too silent these past 4 days i wonder what tf they’re cooking and we know it’ll be something stupid too 😭😭 BUT SM???? DOING THIS???? THATS SO COOL??
Yunho Parisian??? I'm awful cause my first thought was "you should be happy you're leaving Paris, don't cry" https://twitter.com/atzxmxxshx/status/1633617809732419584?t=NHmFuJloyP26WzTNSlOJhw&s=19 btw Paris I blew my Korean friends' minds, they had no idea Paris was that small. It's ridiculous how small it is compared to other big cities in Europe. I haven't eaten spotted dick cause I've been vegetarian for ages before going vegan and even if I still consumed meat you wouldn't catch me eating that shit! I've seen the Jolly x HongSan video, but HJ and his hatred for veggies is so pathetic… is he 10? Maybe that's why he didn't grow
LMFAOOOO FBWMFBWMFBEK THE HATRED FOR PARIS FBWMBDKSJCJC yes yunho rich parisian who doesn’t like it there so i guess ur half right 😭😭 no bc how is paris almost the same size as texas 🤨🤨 EVERY TIME I READ SPOTTED DICK I SCREAAAAM 😭😭😭 ok hot take, do u prefer being a vegan or a vegetarian more, in ur humble opinion <3 i told my mom what vegan was and she’s like “so what are u eating??? grass?? no no that’s too much” context we were watching gordon ramsay cook wild rabbit LMFAOOO WHY NOT! EAT THE SPOTTED DICK FOR THE SAKE OF BEING BRITISH DBSNDBMSJCK no seriously how is this guy not eating veggies, like most, if not all the kr food for them so wHATS HIS EXCUSE,, 😯😯😯 ANON 😳 THE WAY I SCREAMED AT THE LAST PART
Omg I can imagine Canadians treated you badly when you first arrived :( how old were you? //// I'm suddenly more interested in hockey player Hwa! But not as interested as I am in villain Y/N 🥰
it be YOUR OWN PEOPLE! NOT EVEN ANYONE ELSE IT WAS JUST BROWN PEOPLE <3 i was 10 when i came here! but u best believe i talked back 🔫🔫 was not gonna let them off the hook 🔫🔫 it was also a change bc i went to an all girls school and then the day i came here and go to class and i see the buffoons 🤚🏻nasty i tell u, nasty
oH YOU ARE NOW??? 🔫🔫 villian yn hehe <3 made the outline fo rit!
DO YOU SEE THE SPRING SUMMER 2023 IN THE 2ND PHOTO?! https://twitter.com/hwaupdates/status/1634105059675107328?t=PxicAWQT-l-xL-U7HrFw6w&s=19 MODEL! //// Saikers sounds like Psychos lol, I'm worried about their fandom name now 😬
THE OUTFIT!!!!! THE OUTFIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE’S A MODEL, it looks like a photo from the 90’s, like looking at an album of ur parents travelling and boom, u see a this,,, oh to be his kids looking at his photos and flexing them 😭 5$ the fandom name is gonna be shakerz 😭😭
https://twitter.com/byeonbang_tiny/status/1631929720517574662?t=_6tbRTRi5sEmWHO_oPz7tg&s=19 OP claimed Atz won't last long then said some bullshit to save face. They perform more overseas? No shit, there are so many countries djwjssjjsjdnsnnajss do they want 5 Seoul stops or a whole ass Korean tour?! Plus what about music shows, award shows, festivals… so entitled. And apparently Ktinys are hated by security. Hmmm I wonder why https://twitter.com/allabout_atz/status/1634115890634719234?t=oyCp3k9polmr4pGb89c4Fg&s=19 imo they're not hated enough. Shame I didn't show up with a baseball bat, but I'm in Busan right now. And KQ management is ignoring Korean fans?! 😭 miss you're a weirdo who doesn't respect their privacy, sit down
omg the security even saying they dislike kr fans???? damnn 😯🤚🏻 no ur right! where will they perform in korea if not seoul??? like im sure there’s multiple stadiums but like they’re usually busy??? and they did like 2 days at seoul 😭😭😭 they live in korea WHY U WANT A KOREA TOUR 😭😭😭 anon, u need to pull up to the airport,, throw hands, do EVERYTHING! if u see them at the seoul concert, u know what to do 🤚🏻OOOOO IN BUSAN?? how’s that going!
Finally the tour is over, worst weeks of my life!!! We're safe until they announce another one… apparently they're going to perform in SEA, I can't be mad, cause they're often omitted. They'll probably have a cb as well, which is bad for me, since I should focus on work, but I need to perceive Seonghwa 😭/// SICK https://twitter.com/finelineateez/status/1633011361335894021?t=LqLhP52C4_s6MiShNhwAEw&s=19 the binders the pcs came with cost less than $20 so let that sink in 💀
LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 tbh i did not even look at the concert very extensively but just as i was about to, this mf right here🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ sea fans finally getting their share! hopefully fans there are not like the sk ones esp w what happened with nct 😭😭 IM SORRY????? 73$???? HELLO????
And I took all of these photos https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1633804911778598912?t=JI5pKD-zPWaNdXh-jBSfAA&s=19 - thinking of traveller Hwa fic… //// The JK stalker wtf?! Why tf do people like this exist and why aren't they separated from the society
pov : ur going thru model y/n’s photo gallery,, OHHHH U DID NOT JUST BRING REWRITE THE STARS IN THIS, would u mind a model hwa pt2
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jk stalker is so scary??? living that close to him and wanting to GO INSIDE OF HIS HOUSE??? oh my god,, id die in embarrassment tbh
Lmao some of the early lighstick designs were crazy and ugly, but fun. We still have some funny ones now, but there's little to no creativity. I'm still sad the new Lightiny is bald, and not the best quality. And all the white sticks may look neat, but soooooo boring - DV 💖
do u rmr ikon’s bat 😭😭 a whole weapon,, the new lesserafim light stick looks like a garden light stick 😭😭😭 lightiny going bald was a terrible choice,,, im wondering if the hybe sm thing happens, and if they end up changing their light sicks 😭😭
6 years ago…
we’re, we’re getting the RAUNCHY ROMCOMS BACK 😭😭😭😭     i can’t believe she hasn’t done a full on comedy, this is gold, AND THIS???? we won, we won big time, now we need henry cavill doing a action romcom
anon, what the heck 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️
the middle one is seonghwa.
0 notes
moondustis ¡ 6 years ago
Text
the louvre (m)
pairing: jung jaehyun + reader genre: angst, smut, fluff word count: 9k warnings: unhealthy behavior, discussion of depression and anxiety.  summary: “On the nights you spend alone the feeling of loneliness is not as comfortable as it used to be. It’s like Jaehyun has engraved himself in every part of your life, trying to fit in inside every empty spot you had.” song rec: are you bored yet? - wallows / tardes que nunca acabam - baco exu do blues
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'Cause we could stay at home and watch the sunset But I can't help from asking, "Are you bored yet?" And if you're feeling lonely you should tell me Before this ends up as another memory Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie? Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie?
If there is one thing that’s familiar to you is loneliness. You’ve known it for ages and have known it in its rawest and cruelest forms.
At sixteen your parents get a divorce. You saw it coming, of course, all the fights you grew up listening to had to come to an end at some point. You move in with your mother and when you come home from school she has already left work. by the time she arrived you’re already fast asleep.
It gets lonely pretty fast and you find out that you’re not the best at dealing with it. It starts slow, you’re crying for no apparent reason and there’s a sadness in the bottom of your stomach that wants to claw its way up. Then it’s hard waking up in the morning so you just skip class, one day then another, then a whole week. It’s hard finding things that excite you and you stop talking to all of your friends because why bother.
Loneliness eats you alive and you let it. spending most of the time asleep or dozing off from medication you shouldn’t be taking, you waste your teen years just like that, barely graduating. Barely making it.
At nineteen you don’t really know what to do with your life, applying to colleges you are sure you won’t pass and still sleeping more than you should. You fight a lot with your mother and you want desperately to get away. You’re still lonely but now it doesn’t bother you that much anymore.
At twenty you get into college to study art, the only thing that seemed to spark something inside of you. You move away to a dorm room that’s so tiny you can’t share it with anyone. You prefer it that way.
You got so used to being alone that anything other than that makes you antsy, makes you want to cry and hide and never leave your bedroom again. You make few friends and go out very rarely and when the therapeut you attend once asks if you’re okay you cry until you feel empty again.
At twenty you meet Jung Jaehyun.
You feel out of place at the party you are, can of beer feeling cold in your hand and music too loud. You wish you were drunk. Your friend, Taeyong, had abandoned you just a minute ago with the excuse of finding the person he was interested in and telling you to have a good time.
You should have left, of course. but you don’t and Jaehyun finds you by yourself on a couch. He introduces himself with his dimples in your face and offers to keep you company. You shouldn’t have let him.
One drink and you’re laughing at something he says. Another and his hand moves to your thigh. Another and he’s kissing you and then, as if you’ve lost all the control in your body, you let him take your virginity on a stranger’s bed.
That’s problem number one. Problem number two is that jaehyun is too sweet, too gentle. He treats you with a care that you don’t think you deserve. He calls you baby and swallows your moans with his tongue and you feel out of breath. It’s too much and all you need at the same time. You hate it.
Problem number three is that he texts you the next morning. You can’t even remember how he got your number in the first place, deciding to ignore it. You like being alone, it’s better like this.
☞
Winter hits hard this year and you curse yourself for not buying gloves as you walk down campus, your hands stuffed around your pockets. You try to walk as fast as you can, wanting to reach the heat of the classroom for surrealism and finally be able to feel your freezing hands again.
It hasn’t snowed yet, just low temperatures for now, making everyone wish that when it finally comes it’s so devastating that finals have to be cancelled. You pass a girl that you had class with last semester, avoiding her eyes and the possibility of a boring conversation about the weather.
Your phone vibrates in your pocket and you don’t have to see to know it’s Taeyong wanting to make sure you are not still in your bed. You didn’t really want to attend class today but if you skipped another time he would come beat at your door and force you outside. You take it off your pocket, your hand freezing just a little bit more, and text him a quick okay.
What happens next could’ve probably been avoided if you were paying attention to where you were going. But you’re not, so you bump right into the poor person that had the misfortune of being in your way.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry…” You start saying, cutting yourself short when you see who it is. With a little surprised look on his face, Jaehyun stands there looking at you and you pray to all the gods that he doesn’t remember just exactly who you are.
He does, of course. “_________.” He says, almost excitedly and smiles at you while fixing the beanie in his head. He looks like you remember him from last time, with the dimples and soft eyes.  
“Hi.” Is your clever response because you have no idea what you should be saying to the boy that took your virginity. Who you then proceeded to ignore for a whole month. “It’s been a while.”
“Yeah…” You wonder if this is as awkward for him as it is for you. You feel a cold breeze hit you and soon you’ll probably not feel your nose anymore. “You never replied to my texts, I kept wondering if I did something wrong.”
He looks nervous, biting on his bottom lip and shifting the weight from his legs from one foot to the other. You feel something in the pit of your stomach that is probably guilty. “You didn’t!” You say a little too loudly, hands moving as you speak. “I mean, I just got busy with projects, that’s why I never replied. I’m really sorry, you really didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Oh, okay then. That’s a relief.” He says, still looking nervous but more relieved now. “Did you manage to finish all of the projects?”
“Yes.” Why didn’t you lie, that’s what you should’ve done. Tell him that you would be busy for the rest of your life. “Just waiting for finals week.”
There’s a pause, like he’s pondering if he should say what he wants and you wait for the ground to swallow you whole, to end your suffering. Your phone vibrates again in your pocket, probably Taeyong cursing you for being late. You keep your eyes to the ground, avoiding his.
“I… we… maybe we can go out sometime, if you would like.” He tumbles over with his words, in a cute manner. “ I mean, since you’re not busy anymore.”
You’re stupid, that’s what you are. And you can’t say no to people, not when they have puppy eyes and are cute like Jung Jaehyun. So you say yes, promising you’ll reply to his texts this time when he sends you a day and place for the date.
You curse yourself and stupid Jung Jaehyun when you get to class, twenty minutes late, to the door already closed. You get in and try to walk in as silent as you can, keeping your head low until you get to your sit besides a very angry looking Taeyong.
“Why are you late?” He half whispers, half shouts, getting looks from the people sitting next to you but thankfully not the teacher, that continues to talk about René Magritte and his influences.
“Can you please keep quiet?” you whisper back, voice annoyed. “It’s not my fault Jung Jaehyun made me late.”
Taeyong looks at you like you just said the most scandalous thing in the world, ever the overreacter. “Jaehyun? As in that Jaehyun you completely ignored for a whole month?” The urge you have to hit your head on the table is overwhelming.
“Yes, exactly him.” You sigh, trying to focus on the teacher but you know for a fact you won’t be able until you spill out every single detail to your best friend.
“And?”
“I gave him a stupid excuse to why I never replied and guess what? He believed me and had the nerve to ask me on a date.” You get the words out as quickly and low as possible. “So now you have to help me get out of this mess without hurting the poor man.”
There’s a look in his eyes that you can’t quite pinpoint, maybe pity. Whatever it is, it irritates you a bit. “My sweet dear, _____. I’m not gonna help you ruin your chance of getting boned again.” He whispers, reaching out to hold your hands affectionately. “ And your chance of getting to know someone besides me.”
You met Taeyong on your freshman year at one of the introductory classes you had and from the moment he said something nice to you, you stuck to him like glue. He was sweet and caring enough to let you build yourself a little home of sorts inside his life and became your closest friend ever. You had made other friends of course but it was never that meaningful or that lasting.
“What? I know plenty of people beside you. I just talked to Jungwoo and Sicheng yesterd-.” You mutter under your breath.
“They don’t matter.” Taeyong cuts you off, dropping your hands from his hold. “You’re going to this date, even if I have to drag you there.”
All you can do is roll your eyes, muttering a “whatever” before you are turning to face the teacher and finally pay attention in class.
But it’s not like you can pay much attention to it, the numerous slides of surreal paintings and confusing european names forgotten by your overthinking of what will happen on friday.
Later, when you get a text from an unknown number with stupid emojis, the butterflies in your stomach go mad. You ignore them but reply to the text.
“Yeah, friday sounds great :-)”
☞
Friday comes in a blink.
You don’t see the time pass, with your many classes and finals studies keeping you busy. You could have said that you completely forgot about the date but Jaehyun kept texting you all week, keeping a nice conversation about anything that came to mind. He was nice, pleasant to talk to and funny in a lame way that entertained you to no end. It was unusual for you to be interested, almost excited, about talking to someone.
That doesn’t stop the dread that sets in your heart when friday night comes and Taeyong annoyingly texts you asking if you are already ready for the date. You are in fact, standing in front of your mirror with a frown with your face, the skirt feeling too alien and the makeup on your face feeling like too much, even though it’s barely nothing. You don’t know why exactly you’re putting so much effort in this, why you want so hard to impress Jaehyun when there’s no clear goal in your mind.
You’re late and your heart beats like crazy in your chest when you arrive at the café Jaehyun suggested. It’s a small thing that feels even smaller in the midst of your almost anxiety attack, it smells like coffee and something vanilla. You go cold when he spots you and waves for you to come over to the booth he got, you notice that there’s already two drinks on the table.
Your heart doesn’t calm down when you sit in front of him, or when he smiles at you, but you think you do a good job at hiding it when you mutter a low hello, sitting down in front of him. “I’m really sorry I’m late.”
“Oh, it’s okay! I didn’t wait for long.” He says, smiling bashfully and you feel the weight leave your shoulders a little. “I already ordered us drinks, I hope you like mochas. If not it’s totally okay, I can order something el-.”
“I like mochas, Jaehyun.” You interrupt him, smiling at the way he seems nervous. Almost as much as you are. You take the thought of how adorable he looks with his ears turning pink to the back of your head.
The date goes well, better than your overthinking self let you thought it would be. Jaehyun is nice and the talking go as easily as it did on texting, making your nerves calm down easily. You find out he’s getting a degree on chemistry, his eyes shining when he talks passionately about what he likes about it. He also says he’s a big fan of art too, naming all the mainstream artists and making you fond on how he’s trying to impress you even when he doesn’t have to.  
The date goes so well that you accept to go on a second one, to watch a stupid horror movie that’s playing on the cinema near campus. When Jaehyun pretends he’s scared just to hold your hand, you let him. When he kisses you on the back of the empty theater, because according to him the movie is too boring, you let him.
On the third date, to a simple ice cream store, things go so well that he invites you over to his dorm room. You accept, for some reason, and when he presses you against his door the minute he shuts it close, you let him kiss you again.
Maybe this isn’t something you should be doing, but you couldn’t care less. You feel on cloud nine with the way Jaehyun is kissing you, with just the smallest desperation in it, like he’s been waiting a while to do this.
You move your hands to his neck when he deepens the kiss, his own hands holding you by the waist as close as possible to him. The low whine you let out when his tongue finally moves against yours is embarrassing but he doesn’t seem to mind a bit.
It’s nice, so nice that you don’t think much of it when he moves you around, his lips still on yours, until the back of your legs are hitting something hard and then you’re falling down on the softness of his mattress. Oh, your mind smartly provides but you don’t have the time now to overthink, not with Jaehyun kissing you. Now, with his body on top of yours, you get a lot warmer and the pace of the kiss slows down, Jaehyun sucking on your bottom lips and his hand lazily tracing patterns on your exposed hip.
When he breaks the kiss his breath is heavy and lips all swollen, a look that you probably mimic. He smiles at you in a way that’s too sweet for what you are doing, and, out of all things, that makes you blush slightly, smiling back at him. He looks beautiful like this, your mind dazedly provides, and you wish you could keep the image in your brain forever.
Not even a minute passes before he’s moving his head down to press small kisses on your exposed neck, innocent at first and then with more purpose. You shiver when his slight cold hand dips inside the warmth of your sweater, moan a little when he sucks on a spot that’s a little too sensitive, teeth grazing your skin in a way that’s too sinful.
Again, you don’t think much when he hikes your sweater up, letting it bunch just underneath your chest. Or when he presses kisses on your stomach, on the skin just below your belly button. You let your legs rub together, trying to get at least a bit of friction, hoping he won’t notice.
“Can i take these off?” He asks, hand already on the button of your jeans and all you do is dumbly nod. maybe you’re a bit naive, too inexperienced at this. He removes the pants with a little raise from your hips, throwing it gently somewhere in the room. You think what a sight you must be, with your sweater bunched on your chest and pink panties with cherries on it. There’s definitely a blush on your face now.
You try to press your legs together on instinct when he presses a kiss just inside your thigh but he doesn’t let you, hands gripping at them and making you keep them open. He continues doing as he pleases, sucking on the soft skin and biting little marks on your thighs. It isn’t until he moves to remove your panties that your hearts starts beating a little more fast. “W-What are you doing?” You ask dumbly.
“Huh?” He looks up at you, a confused look on his eyes and both lips and ears a cute pink shade. “Gonna eat you out, is that okay?”
“I, what? Why?” You mumble, words getting lost together on how nervous you suddenly are. You didn’t expect jaehyun to eat you out on your third date. Or ever. The mere thought of it making yours cheeks warm. You always thought of it as something too intimate, even too dirty, definitely not something a boy would be offering you so willingly. “You don’t have to, Jaehyun.”
He looks at you like you’re talking nonsense. “I want to.” Is what he simply replies with, thumb playing with the hem of the infamous panties. “Can i?”
You think you’re going to explode from how embarrassed you are. You nod bashfully, taking a deep breath and turning your face to the side so you don’t have to face him when you say the quietest yes ever. You miss the silly smile on his lips but not the way he whispers a little “cute”, making your cheeks heat impossibly more.
He removes your panties then, placing them neatly on the side of the bed before he’s moving between your legs again. Just the proximity of him is enough to have your heart racing with anticipation.
In an almost lovingly way he kisses your clit, making you shift a little. He holds your legs open, fingers drawing soothing patterns on your thigh. You have no time to overthink it because in no time his tongue is licking you in a kitten like way before he let’s his tongue fall flat on your entrance, gathering the wetness there and dragging it up to your clit. He eats you out like he has done this many time before and it turns you into a mess very quickly.
You moan out his name loudly when he sucks on just right, your hands gripping at the sheets. You don’t even feel embarrassed by the noises you’re makings, too overwhelmed by the heat that pools in your lower abdomen.
You feel his hand move against where your is gripping the sheets and for a moment you think he wants to hold hands. But he takes your hand in his and brings it to his head and oh, you finally realize it, he wants you to grip hair. So you do, and the way he hums approvingly sends waves of pleasure all through your body.
You come easily, your whole body shaking and he doesn’t stop his movements until you’re whining from the over stimulation. When he looks up you almost die from the way his lips are shiny and how your wetness smears his chin. It’s sinful and dirty but you still let him kiss you senseless.
You must be feeling brave after your orgasm because you move your arm in between your bodies until you’re palming him through his pants. He breaks the kiss, moaning lowly against your lips and it has to be the hottest thing you have ever experienced in your life. You want to hear it again and again.
You move uncertainty, stroking him over the thick fabric of his jeans and watching as his eyes flutter close. “Baby…” He almost whines. “Please.”
“I-I’ve never done this before.” You mumble, seeking for his eyes and he laughs softly. ”You gotta teach me.”
Your words seem to affect him a bit and he quickly moves to undo his zipper, pushing his pants and boxers down in one swift motions. His shirt goes next.
You don’t remember much from the night jaehyun took your virginity, but you do remember that he had a pretty dick. If such a thing even exists. You keep your eyes on it until he’s back on top of you, lips meeting yours briefly before he’s taking your hand and moving it on top of his on his erection.
He shows you how he likes it, stroking his length in quick motions and when you get the grip of it he lets his hand fall to the sides of your head, supporting himself. It’s mesmerizing the way he groans when you run your thumb on his head, spreading pre come on his length so the slide of your hand is easier. “Faster, baby.” He says, pressing a kiss to the side of your face, and you obligate.
Maybe it’s the confidence the sounds he makes gives you. Or the impulsiveness you’re feeling rushing through your body. But you stop your motions and start moving around until you’re positioned between his legs, your face so close to his dick you are sure he can feel your deep breaths. “I want to try something.” You simply say.
“No, baby. You don’t have to.” He says gently bringing his hand to your cheek, thumb caressing it. You pout.
“But i want to.” Is what you reply with and he doesn’t have the strength to counterpoint that, hand moving to your hair still gently and bringing your face so close to his dick that your lips touch it slightly.
You try to remember what you saw on porn and let spit gather on your mouth before you’re letting in fall on him, hand moving quickly to spread it. “Oh fuck.” His voice is raspy and you’re sure you’re clenching around nothing right now. “You’re so dirty, where did you learn this?”
You just blush, looking at him with a look that will be forever engraved in his mind. He looks at you like he wants to ruin you. You would let him, of course.
You try to get as much of him in your mouth without gagging, which is not much, using your hands on the parts you can’t. It’s probably far from the best head he ever received, you’re too messy and uncoordinated, but he seems to enjoy it. He moans the way you like so much and praises you in ways that make your cheeks heat and your heart flutter. He moves your head when he starts to come, letting it fall on your face and just a bit on your open mouth, the taste making your eyebrows furrow.
He’s sweet after, cleaning your face and still showering you with praise you don’t think you deserve.
You don’t overthink it when he cuddles you and asks you to stay the night. Or when you wake up the next morning and think that you wouldn’t mind waking up to his parted lips and messy hair everyday.
☞
You assume it’s the natural thing to happen, there’s no discussion to it and it makes you feel a bit of anxiety pool in the pit of your stomach. You’re confused and freaking out because maybe you’re not ready for this and maybe you’re not ready. It always scares you when things move too fast and now you’re seeing Jaehyun almost everyday. And when he kisses it’s not as meaningless as it used to be. You feel on the verge of panic.
Taeyong assures you it’s going to be okay, that you can’t have control of things all the time like you want. Sometimes you should let it happen as it goes. So you do that and when Jaehyun kisses you, you kiss him back with as many meaning as you can give it.
Weekend dates turn into nights spent at his dorm, then you’re doing everyday things with him. There’s something strangely comfortably and personal about going grocery shopping with someone while they hold your hand.
After one month of something that it’s quite undefined, Jaehyun introduces you to his friends and calls you his girlfriend in front of all of them. One of them, Johnny smiles and says it’s nice to finally meet the girl Jaehyun talks about for hours non ending. The flowers in your stomach bloom so uncontrollably that the fear of how big this whole thing is for you is forgotten for a moment.
You’re not good with relationships, of any sort. Being alone has taught you a lot of things but how to be with another person is not one of them. You move uncertain, scared of doing the wrong thing and getting hurt. Or the last thing you would want in this world, to hurt Jaehyun.
He’s so patient, asking you all the time if there’s something wrong and holding your hand tightly when you seem nervous about something. He kisses your worries away, not even bothering when you sometimes get a bit distant, take too long to reply. You don’t feel like you deserve any of that.
On the nights you spend alone the feeling of loneliness is not as comfortable as it used to be. It’s like Jaehyun has engraved himself in every part of your life, trying to fit in inside every empty spot you had. When you close your eyes he’s right there behind your eyelids and his perfume is everywhere. You let yourself melt into it.
You don’t know if it’s normal to feel like this, the only other romantic experience being a puppy love years ago. You wonder if the thoughts of Jaehyun that roam your mind and warm your heart are normal, wonder if you’re supposed to feel butterflies in your stomach everytime you see him even after months of dating. For a minute you let yourself think that maybe, if soulmates were real, then Jaehyun was yours. Something meant to happen, that’s how you feel when he looks at you.
You hope he feels the same way. There’s no way your heart can take it if he doesn’t.
☞
On one normal saturday morning, when you and Jaehyun are out buying groceries, he asks you to dye his hair for him.
He has stopped in the beauty aisle, eyeing all the products, examining the different boxes and colors,  when he throws the proposition at you. “You’re an artist.” he reasons, when you look at him like he’s crazy. “So that makes you the only person I trust to do this.”
You sigh, standing in your tip toes so you can look at the products too over his shoulders. “I’m not a hair artist.” You mutter. “What if I fuck your hair up and you end up bald?”
He finally decides on the brand he thinks is more trustable, throwing the box in the small shopping cart. “I wouldn’t mind being bald that much.” There’s a playful smile on his lips when he turns to look at you and it makes you snort. “Would you?”
“Would I mind you being bald? Yeah, probably.” He has the nerve to pout, arms pulling you closer in a hug. Deciding to entertain him you press a quick peck to his lips, blushing when notice there’s an old lady just walking in the aisle you are.
He notices you embarrassament, not letting you get out from his embrace when you try to and moving his face close to yours in attempts to kiss you again. The lady looks like she finds the scene adorable. “Maybe I’ll make you bald on purpose.” You bite at him and that just makes him laugh out loud.
Later Jaehyun sits patiently on a chair in the middle of your tiny dorm room, rolling through his instagram as you apply the bleaching powder on his hair. The smell is awful even with the bit of your window open. “Does it burn?” You ask him. “I read somewhere online it’s supposed to.”
“A little, yeah.” He replies, looking up at you and throwing a cute smile. You show him your tongue. “But it’s not like, unbearable. Don’t worry, baby.”
You hum, examining his hair to see if you didn’t miss any parts. You’re sure he’s trying to show you a brave façade because there’s no way something this white and smelling this bad is not burning his scalp to hell. “Now we only gotta wait like 20 minutes, I think.” It’s late afternoon now, you notice when you check your phone after removing the protective gloves and throwing it in the ground.
“If we finish before it gets dark we could go get ice cream.” He suggests, making you nod enthusiastically. Your weekends usually went like this, going out to eat something together, sometimes watching a movie and then coming back to either of your dorms. You liked it.
While you wait for the minutes to pass you decide to put on music to play, something from an r&b playlist that Jaehyun likes, and you smile when he sings along. He shows you random videos on his phone every now and then but besides that it’s just comfortable silence or talking about how your week went. He pretends to understand when you go on about a new painting technique and you pretend to understand when he talks about the experiment he did on class.
Your alarm goes off, signalling that the 20 minutes have passed. “Do you think it’s done already?” Jaehyun uses the small mirror on your wall to examine the hair, it’s considerably more light and it doesn’t seem to be falling off.
“Yeah. It doesn’t have to be like, stark white.” You grab a towel from you drawer, moving to your bathroom with Jaehyun following behind.
Washing his hair in the sink proves to be a difficult job, even more because your bathroom was definitely not made to fit more than one person inside. But you make do, with water splashing everywhere because he keeps giggling and moving around too much. When all the bleaching is removed Jaehyun stares at you with very blonde hair that for some weird reason looks really good on him. “Maybe I should just keep it like this.” He says, bending his knees down just a little so you can reach his head to dry it.
“It wouldn’t be that bad.” You reply, admiring how cute he looks with his hair sticking up everywhere. “But the hair dye was too expensive.”
He hums, moving back to normal now that you’ve finished drying his hair. He circles his arms around your waist and keeps staring at you for longer than necessary. “What?” You hit his chest playfully, feeling shy from his stare.
“You’re just too pretty, is all.” His words make your cheeks heat up. It’s like he has the special power of always turning you into an embarrassed mess with just a few words. “And I love you.”
The butterflies in your stomach go wild, your chest feeling like there’s no space for breathing. It’s almost painful and you could cry, but you don’t. It’s the first time he has ever said it out loud like this, and so sincere. You had figured, of course, by the way he looks at you and how he makes love to you oh, so gently.
The only reply you can give him is the press of your lips to his, sweet and slow, and it seems to do. He sighs into the kiss, trying to deepen it but you don’t let him, breaking it and smiling at the way his eyes have stars on it. “Come on, we have to dye your hair pink.”
It takes another hour for you to get the dye on every part of Jaehyun hair, getting distracted here and there because he keeps cracking stupid jokes and trying to convince you to dye yours green so you two could be like Cosmo and Wanda. Afterwards, when you stare at Jaehyun in all his glory with the pastel pink hair you feel your heart swoons. It suits him perfectly, like the color pink was invented for him and no one else. The way he blushes when you tell him just how pretty he looks just makes the whole thing better.  
You finish just in time to watch the sunset as you two make your way to the small and cozy ice cream shop down the street. You feel content with Jaehyun’s hand in yours, even if the way your coat matches his hair makes people that pass by you stare weirdly.
“Here you go, baby.” He says, handing you your ice cream and sitting down at the table you got inside of the store. “Cookies and dark chocolate, your favorite.”
You thank him, a smile on your face. It’s such a small thing, to remember someone’s favorite ice cream flavors, but it makes your heart jump happily in your chest. You watch as he takes a spoonful of his own choice, pistachio and vanilla, and it dawns on you that you love him. You had thought about it before, of course, but right now you’re so filled with infatuation for the man before you that you would like to scream to him the words that he said earlier.
He gets you out of your little daze by moving to wipe your hand with a napkin. “Stop staring at me, your ice cream is melting.” He scolds but with no harshness to his voice. “You’re like a little baby I have to take care of.”
You show him your tongue playfully. “Still, you love me.” Your next words are impulsive, something unlike you in many ways, but they just fall out your lips like they can’t be unsaid anymore. “And… I love you too.”
He smiles, lips slightly smeared with ice cream and leans in on the table to kiss you, almost getting ice cream all over his sweater. His lips taste like pistachio and it’s perfect.
Later when you two are walking back to his dorm you ask him if he believes in souls.
He looks at you a little confused. “Maybe?” Is his reply. “I don’t know, why?”
You swing your connected hands a little, pondering on how you should say what you want to, not wanting him to think you’re weird or delusional. “Because I have this feeling that… well, that our souls are somehow connected?” You say stumbling a little over your words, voice uncertain. “Like maybe we were supposed to meet, you know?”
He smiles like he finds the whole thing amusing. “Are you trying to say we are soulmates?”
You blush, nodding and he stops midway, making you stop too. “You’re probably right.” Is the only thing he says before spinning you in his arms and kissing you lovingly. You can’t hide the smile that spreads on your face.
☞
Jaehyun is always gentle, even when he doesn’t have to be.
You two had a nice date, something fancy for once at an italian restaurant that opened recently. By the end of the night you’re tipsy from the wine you shared and a little too touchy towards him.
You think the lingerie with shyly put on for him would stir something, make him lose control but it’s the same as always. He eats you out, like it’s his favorite thing in the world, and after he has made you come he enters you with a little moan coming from his mouth. He fucks you slowly and with care, vanilla almost. And you love it, you do, the way he bites your neck a little as he thrusts into you in a pace that drives you crazy. But you want more, want him to fuck you like he’s desperate and crazy for it. Wants him to hurt you in ways that make your eyes roll.
“Jae, please” You whine against his mouth. You don’t want to feel delicate, don’t want to feel like this means something to him. You want him to fuck you so fast that you forget that you feel something, you want numbness and complete bliss.You want to forget the way your heart blooms in your chest when he looks at you like he is right now. “Y-You can fuck me harder.”
He makes a little sounds that it’s half a groan and half a confused noise. “Yeah?” He asks like he wants to be sure and when you nod he presses his lips to your in a bruising kiss. He thrusts one more time slowly and then he’s picking up the pace, fucking into you fast and deep like you had wanted so many times.
It makes you scream, hands grabbing at his shoulders with the same force he’s gripping at your thighs. “Yes, yes.” He seems just as affected, grunting and groaning just beside your ears. “Want you to ruin me.”
It does something to him, his hips snapping with as much force as possible and he moans so pretty you clench around him. “You’re going to fucking kill me, baby.” He whispers, thumb coming to your lower lips and you let your mouth fall open, letting him press it flat on your tongue and you suck it like you’re trying to put on a show for him. “You’re so dirty for me, aren’t you? You look like an angel but you’ll let me fuck you like this.”
You never thought he could say things like this. Your eyes flutter close and all you can do is nod, lips still around his finger as he fucks you so deep you’re seeing stars.
It’s very easy to fall into a delirious headspace, with the way Jaehyun is doing exactly what you asked him to. It’s exciting to see him lose control like this. “You like it, baby?” He asks, removing his finger from your mouth so you can finally speak. “Hmm? Like being fucked like this?”
Just then he thrusts in a spot that has you clenching around him and throwing your head back in the pillow. “Y-Yes, please.” You moan desperately, feeling your orgasm closer with each of his thrusts. “I’m so close, oh my god.”
You can feel the sweet relief in the pit of your stomach and when Jaehyun presses his thumb on your clit, circling in pace with his thrusts, you explode. It’s heaven and heat thrumming to your veins as you clench so hard around him that his hips stutter and he grips your thighs harder.
“Fuck, fuck.” He curses, closing his eyes as you ride the last waves of your orgasm. “I’m gonna fill you up so well, Baby, you want that?”
You can even reply properly, giving him a weak nod and clenching around him again so he’s moaning your name loudly, hips stuttering as he comes inside of you.
Afterwards he’s back to he’s delicate self, treating you with so much care that’s it’s like he feels he has tainted something precious. He cleans the come that starts to drip off you and you tell him how much you liked the whole thing. His ears turn red when he says he liked it as well.
☞
You don’t like parties, never had. too loud and too many people but Jaehyun seems to love all that.
Every friday he tried his best to convince you to attend one of his friend’s get together, telling you how fun it would be and that he would be by your side the whole time. You say yes, more because of the second reason than the first one.
The party it’s not that bad, not at all. There’s not too many people and Jaehyun’s friends are nice, so nice that you even dance a little with some of them. After many and many shots of the red liquid they keep giving you, it’s sweet enough that you don’t think much when you down all of them.
Once upon a time, on your first ever college party, Taeyong had introduced you to a thing called pure vodka. You were never much of a drinker before so you don’t know exactly why you get so carried on with it, ignoring the burning on your throat as you down shot after shot.
Knowing you would drink that night you had decided to not take your anxiety medication, mistake number two. It all happened very slowly, like in a movie almost. You began getting tipsy and too happy, dragging Taeyong around and laughing with him. Next thing you knew your heart felt like it was trying to escape your chest with how fast it started beating. It was the worst panic attack you ever had, crying you little heart out because no one knew how to help you. You don’t remember how the night ended.
You should’ve remembered that occurrence as you take your fifth shot,Jaehyun keeping you close with a hand around your waist. “Slow down, baby.” He says, moving your hair out of your face.
You kiss him once, twice and then you’re giggling stupidly. He seems amused by it all. “I’m okay, Jaejae.” He laughs at the silly nickname.
You have a good time, you really do. Dancing with Jaehyun and laughing with his friends until you feel the tightness on your chest. Like you had suddenly gotten the soul sucked out of your body, you feel an emptiness that you’re too familiar with. Your eyes start welling up as the world around you spins and spins. Jaehyun is beside you, talking excitedly to one of his friends and you grip tightly at his shirt. You really don’t want to bother him, not when he seems to be so happy, but you feel it getting worse and worse and the panic settling in the pit of your heart.
“Jaehyun, can you please take me home?” You say quietly so no one else will hear it. The knot in your stomach keeps getting tighter and the last thing you want is to cry in front of a whole party.
His face changes immediately, worry all over his features and he searches your eyes for any signs. “Why? What’s wrong, baby?”
You just whine, childish and pathetic. “Please, can we just go?” You wish with all your body that you weren’t doing this right now, ruining his night like this.
He just nods, guiding you outside the party and into his car. It doesn’t take long for the tears to come, Jaehyun glancing at you every few seconds and it just makes you cry even more. “Baby, you gotta tell me what’s wrong.” He coos, hand coming to massage your thigh in a soothing way. You just shake your head, lowering it so you hair hides your face from his view. “Did something happen?” His voice is filled with worry.
You shake your head again, feeling the dizziness from the alcohol when you do.
When you get to his dorm you immediately try to move to his bed, want to hide there forever and feel safe in the warmth of it, but he doesn’t let you. He wraps you in his arms, hand stroking your hair and it only makes you cry more, hiding your face in his chest and probably getting his shirt all dirty. “Come on, baby.” He whispers as if to not disturb you. “After we clean you up you can lay down.”
He takes you to the bathroom, turning on the shower on a hot temperature and then starts undressing you with all the patient in this world. It’s not weird and he doesn’t seem bothered to be nursing you like you can’t possibly take care of yourself. You probably look a mess, makeup smeared and face swollen from all the crying. The world around you still spins a little.
You whine when the water hits your body and Jaehyun only sushes you, removing his smeared t-shirt so he can get inside the box with you. You fall putty in his arms as he tries his best to wash you, massaging your hair with care. You feel awful for doing this to him, when you don’t deserve half of it. You don’t deserve the way he cares for you or how treats you with such delicacy. You just ruined his whole night. “I’m… I’m so sorry.” You mumble incoherently, tears forming in your eyes again.
“No, no, baby. Don’t cry.” He says but it’s useless, the tears are already mixing with the water as they fall down your cheeks. “Tell me what’s wrong, please.”
You start talking about how you’re a mess and awful,  that you doesn’t deserve him and how you’re going to ruin his life because that’s what you do with everything around your life. Your words are slurred and you can’t stop crying anymore, weeping sounds coming out of your mouth and Jaehyun just holds you like the perfect man he is. “Shh, ___.” His hand rubs your back soothingly, getting himself all wet but he couldn't care less. “You’re none of these things and you’re not going to ruin anything.”
“I am!” You want to argue but he doesn’t let you, just hugs you tighter and whispers calming words until you stop moving around.
Afterwards, when he dries you both up and puts you on comfortable clothes, he takes you to bed and cuddles you. “I love you, ___. There’s nothing wrong with you.” He says and if you weren’t too numb now you would cry again. Your head starts to ache and you can feel yourself drifting off asleep.
☞
Things go downhill from there.
You get as distant as possible from everyone around you and there are days that you wake up and not a single part of your body wants to be alive. You skip class and don’t even mind when Taeyong sends angry texts scolding you.
You spend your days sleeping and painting, making good use of the strange inspiration you get whenever you have bad days. You’re used to this, have experienced it many times before, and that’s probably a bad sign. But even if it’s normal you’re still not the best at dealing with with, acting like it’s the end of the world whenever it gets bad.
Jaehyun texts you and you try to your best to reply and make up excuses to why he can’t come see you. He probably knows something is wrong but you don’t want to tell him that some days you wake up and you don’t find the strength to even wash your own hair. Don’t want to tell you that sometimes you close your eyes and think that the world would probably be better off without you. You don’t wanna upset him, not more than you already are.
Taeyong visits on a rainy day, almost slamming your door with how much he knocks. He looks angry when you open the door but his eyes often as he sees you, hair messy and wearing a hoodie that has too many paint splashes. You’re not feeling as empty as the start of the week, your heart warming up when you see him.
He hugs you for a good minute, before he’s looking at you with a furrow between his brows. “Let’s wash this hair, okay?” He says and you can’t help but smile a little.
You let him wash your hair in your tiny shower while you’re only on your underwear. It’s not weird or uncomfortable, never is with Taeyong. He massages your scalp while he tells you what you missed from class, you don’t pay so much attention to the artist names but his voice feels comfortable.
“Jaehyun has been asking about you like crazy.” He says with care when he’s drying your hair afterwards. You feel a pang of guilty in your chest and your eyes get glossy from unshed tears. “He’s very worried.”
“I have texted him that I was not feeling very well.” You say, voice small and Taeyong just tsks.
“You can’t just text your boyfriend that and expect him to not be worried sick about you.”
You bite your lips, your thoughts going a mess and you just want to hide in the safety of your bed again. “Maybe I should just break up with him.” You say, heart heavy in your chest. That’s not what you want. Taeyong knows that and he raises one eyebrow. As much as you try to pretend you would be okay if it happened, leaving Jaehyun would destroy you completely.
“You keep acting like you’re not worthy things as simple as a boys attention. You didn’t force Jaehyun into your life, he’s into it because he wants to, because he loves you.” Taeyong says and each words stabs a wound deeper in your chest. “You got so comfortable being lonely that you can get your head around the fact you don’t have to be alone for the rest of your life.”
You don’t notice that you start crying, never dealing too well with the truth being told directly to your face. Everyone was always so hesitant around you, being extra careful with their words as if to not hurt you. Taeyong doesn’t care about that, he tells you things how they are and he will gladly hurt your feelings if it means it’ll snap you out of whatever daze you got yourself in.
“One day you will wake up feeling miserable because you let a good thing go. Jaehyun knows you’re not perfect, he has seen you in some pretty fucked up days and he decided to stay. Give up control for once and let him decide if you’re not good for him like you think so.”
When he leaves you lay down and think of Jaehyun. Simply, you think of him, without you. You think of how his ears turn red when gets shy, how his dimples get so deep when he smiles. You think of how happy he got on his birthday because of the surprise party you threw for him with his friends. You think about the look in his eyes whenever he’s talking about or doing something he’s passionate about. You think about the time you both saw an abandoned kitten at the street and he almost cried because he couldn’t take it home.
Then you think about him with you. How he will go out of his way when you’re on your period and craving something sweet. How he looks at you like you put the stars in the sky and how he kisses you with so much care that it makes you feel like floating. You think of the time he spent hours in the phone with your mom talking about her flowers like he knew or cared a lot about the subject, just because he wanted to impress her. Of the times he’ll watch you paint in silence just because, in his words, it’s so mesmerizing. Think of every time he has made you feel special and every little thing he does everyday to show you he loves you, the little emojis and texts, the random kisses. Everything.
You try to think of living a life where Jaehyun is not by your side and when you do your heart feels like it shatters. You could live without him of course, but the thing is, you don’t want to.
You get up suddenly, changing as quickly as possible as walking until you’re on Jaehyun’s dorm front door. It’s a little stupid because you don’t even know if he’s home right now and you stand there, your heart beating a little fast after you knock.
“Hi.” Is what you smartly says and he smiles sadly at you. “Can I come inside?”
He steps outside and lets you in, there’s a few books opened on his bed and you realize that you probably just disturbed his studying. “I’m sorry, were you busy?”
He shakes his head, pushing the books aside and sitting on his bed, patting the empty spot beside him so you’ll sit too. You bask in the warmth of being close to him. “Not really.” Is all he says.
You hum, eyeing him and feeling your heartbeat go a little faster. You hate talking about your feelings, can feel your cheeks heat up from just the thought of it and you really hope you don’t end up crying in front of Jaehyun again.” I just came to apologize for isolating myself and not giving you an explanation.” You murmur eyes not meeting his. “And I know i’ve said that I don’t think I deserve you, and I really don’t, but I want you. So bad it scares me.”
When he doesn’t reply right away you start saying that you would completely understand if he wanted to breakup, your heart breaking a little, until he starts laughing. When you look up he’s staring at you like you’re crazy but there’s still fondness in his eyes. “You’re so silly. You really think I would want to breakup?” He grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a hug that almost suffocates you. Still, you let yourself fall into his arm and enjoy the feeling of being safe. “I love you so much, but you can’t just disappear and not tell me what’s going on. Do you know how many Frank Ocean songs I listened to while thinking of you?”
You scoff, hiding deeper into his chest and loving the way it vibrates when he laughs. “I’m really sorry.” Your words are muffled by his sweater.
“It’s okay, baby.” He pats your head sweetly. “But you need to realize that I don’t care that you are a little messed up, I am too. And I’m here when you feel like life is not going very well. I want to be here and take care of you.”
You look up to his face, examining the slight stubble that’s forming on his chin. “Are you sure? I can be a lot to deal with.”
He smiles, with his dimples showing. “I’m aware, and I think I can handle it.”
When he kisses you it’s like a weight leaves your shoulders. You’ll embrace loneliness when it decides to come again but for now you let Jaehyun fill the empty spaces like he was made just for it.
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prsfphone ¡ 3 years ago
Text
stalker | t.r. x reader
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word count: 801
warnings: nsfw, smut, dark, penetrative sex, cnc/dubcon (only in the beginning), dirty talk, very light nipple play
a/n: inspired in part by haunting adeline and also by tana mongeau’s newest stalker storytime LMAO. also. new draco fic coming next week.
“please,” you begged. the word should have been a plea for him to stop - instead, it was a desperate gasp for more as this man - your stalker - fucked you so hard you were sure you’d be bedridden for days.
his hands were everywhere; holding your hips down to the mattress, telling you fuck, take it so good for me, sweetheart. knew you would. thought - fuck - thought about it for weeks. they were on your tits, rolling your nipples between long, pale fingers, promising i’ll come on these too, sweetheart. show you who you belong to. when ‘m done with you, you’ll be ruined for any other man. they were around your throat, avowing i’ll kill anyone who touches you, understand? every breath you take is mine, see? with a pointed squeeze hard enough to bruise. and they were on your clit, provoking, give me another one, sweetheart. show me how much you hate me as i make your pretty little cunt sob for my cock.
you’d lost count of how many times he’d made you come now. you felt used up and messed, yet absolutely wired with unspent energy; a wind-up toy on its last legs and desperate to be spun out.
the only light in the room came from the open terrace doors, the moonlight washing onto his alabaster skin, none reflecting in his dark, greedy eyes. shadows crawled on his skin as he grabbed at your waist and maneuvered you around again, his own personal fuck toy. but he’d lifted you off his cock and was settling against your headboard, hands behind his head, staring at you voraciously. “ride me, sweetheart.”
the pet name made you chafe and he seemed to know it - he knew just about everything else about you, so why not this too?
you’d been so close to another orgasm when he shifted positions but now that he was doing this, forcing you to show him much you wanted him without his hands there as a scapegoat for you to blame for the way you cried for his touch, his cock, your chest went cold. your stomach was a pit of burning coals and you were nothing short of a mess between your thighs but still, you merely sat against his ribbed abdomen motionlessly.
“did i fuck you brain dead, sweetheart? hmm?” he reached up to stroke your cheek, touch feather-light and sending electric jolts through your body. the hand fell, suddenly, to your throat and he squeezed. hard. harder than he ever had before. adrenaline surged and your hands scrabbled against his big one to no avail. he didn’t let up an inch. “that wasn’t a rhetorical question.” your cheeks grew hot and black encroached on your vision, little spots dancing in your line of sight.
“n-no,” you choked out.
he smiled indulgently, but there was no hint of it in his eyes. “then i suggest you do as you’re told.” he relaxed his grip and you gulped down oxygen, but he left his hand there, a reminder that made your pulse flutter against your skin. with his hand resting there, he could feel it. “sit on my cock and make yourself come.”
this time, you did as you were told and seated yourself slowly, oh so slowly, on his cock. by the time he was fully sheathed in you, you were panting, trying to find some hidden space that might accommodate him better, might make you feel less like you were splitting apart at the seams. there was a sadistic sort of glint to his eyes, a certain tilt to his mouth and he thrust up into you from below just to hear the whimper that tumbled from your parted lips. “move,” he advised.
you could only shake your head, trying to catch your breath. “can’t,” you finally managed.
he pouted, mocking you. “don’t you want to show me who that pretty pussy belongs to, sweetheart?” he gave another shallow, halfhearted thrust. “i could tell you but i want to hear it from your pretty mouth.”
you began moving your hips, exploratory, in small motions. circling, not yet fucking him. your head fell back on your neck when he grew impatient with your motions and, hands on your hips, began doing the work for you. “you,” you moaned, tits bouncing.
“mmm, that’s not my name, sweetheart.”
you fought for purchase anywhere, something to hold on to as he disrupted your entire nervous system with his cock - you settled on his hands, his wrists, holding them tight and digging your nails in as he lifted you up and down. “i don’t know your name,” you panted.
“tom,” he supplied and you almost laughed. what an ordinary name. what an absolutely plain name. “now let me hear you scream it as i make you come, sweetheart.”
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