#things get really weird from now on :)
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secret wars secret love you will ALWAYS be famous
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#snap sketches#//draws eriks weird reindeer thing differently to make this pose work// vjELAKVJEALKJV#maybe ill stick to this but i kinda like the 'barricade' vibe of the other option but anyway#mom said its MY turn to reference the famous bridal carry panel#this was supposed to be a quick warm up but as i was lining things my hand started to tremble really bad#i dont know why ??????????????? thats never happened before and my hand's perfectly fine and normal now#like my hands tremble a little from time to time but nothing ever detrimental#the trembling i had today was ACTUALLY crazy bad. had me concerned but i was also able to still draw so not that bad ig#ANYWAYS. yeah <3 i wanted to reference tha panel we all love ......#i draw this mfer carrying his mfer so much i fear i cant be stopped. charles is a princess who needs to be princess carried#i usually draw it like. An Actual Block or whatever but its flatter ... so charles may rest his weary head ...#i did draw charles getting a handful. its what he deserves. its also what i deserve but i cant have that now can i#erik living my dream too tho ..... life is so unfair i wanna carry charles xavier and kiss his head this life SUCKS#slowly being able to feed my cherik fix again we're Semi back. once i finish my work for once THEN we'll be so fuckin back jWRKLJLAKF#ok thats all from me bye bye
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"yandere evil cycle Clara" this "yandere evil cycle Clara" that, yes i agree, its drawn very well and is very Aesthetic and im so excited to see where this is going but i have a Question-
why is Iruma blushing through most of this chapter-
either Clara's subtly put a charm spell on him (though wouldn't it affect Azz too in that case?) or, he's somehow kinda into this.
i know the first option is more likely but the idea of Iruma thinking the evil cycles are hot is so fucking funny. could you imagine.
#mairimashita! iruma kun#like that'd be CRAZY#...would kind of explain why Iruma's fake evil cycle acts a lil flirty though#like. its a ''hes doing what he thinks is attractive'' kind of thing#would he have reacted like this to Azz's evil cycle too is the question... now im thinking maybe there's a reason Iruma didn't get to see i#THINKING ABOUT IT. ISN'T THIS THE FIRST TIME HE'S /REALLY/ SEEN SOMEONE IN AN EVIL CYCLE#im not counting those who returned to origins in that#cause the difference in those situations was Iruma was actually in danger around Origins people. he trusts Clara and Azz#the thing that's killing me is that it wouldn't even be out of character for Iruma to think its attractive#especially since the story's been making Iruma more ''demonic'' in making him more greedy#since he started off as way too selfless and all that#and the whole underlying arc for Iruma specifically is that like. ''sometimes indulging and being selfish is a good thing''#so it wouldn't even be that WEIRD for this to be a Thing#...also i just really want a Love Trio Polyam development please upgrade from soulmates to ''soulmates who are lovers'' RIGHT NOW
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A Message from Sleep Token ☼ The Heavy Music Awards 2021 — the message | background footage | font | sleep token logo | all messages
#stm_edits#user copia all tag#sleep token#flashing gifs#yeah why not make an obnoxiously long edit of incomprehensible automated voice stuff from 2021#using sleep token's own weird stock footage content (cheers to fields of elation)#do i not have a single better thing to do#i feel like i can't survive the wait until november so i'm replicating the experience of hearing this opening in person lmao#also. taking analysis suggesions on this because ngl vessel i love you but sometimes i don't really get you#posting this now is such a bad idea but if i don't i'll just keep editing until i can't look at it#user copia edits
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin charlie#charlie magne#hazbin edit#requested#hazbin hotel pilot#that's entertainment#charlie#my gifs#god ain't she the cutest little thing!#not gonna lie i get a bit emotional seeing her do The Pose during ''wonderful fantastic new hotel''#it's the same pose she does in the S1 poster :')#okay actually im back here to say some things in the tags:#holy almighty LORD these gave me so much grief to color in a way i thought looked nice#specifically the one of her in the news chair. sorry i was NOT gonna let that hideous highlighter green color assault all your eyeballs.#did i lose nearly two hours of sleep getting it right because i still have no idea what i'm doing? yes. worth it? YES. ohh yes.#i liked the seafoam look so i made the cloud sequence match :] or at least tried to#there WAS supposed to be another one of her in the news room but i just hated how it kept turning out so i scrapped it.#coloring the main series was one thing to learn but the PILOT? never has it been so obvious to me just how much more bright and vibrant#the colors got during the progression of the world design. also. if by any chance one of those cool and experienced#gif makers happens to see these tags and wants a good laugh: i've been doing this for how many months now? and just last NIGHT figured out#how to use the fucking eraser in photoshop....... thing is... i also draw. i KNOW what program tools look like. i KNOW ppl draw in PS.#i'm just a really silly fuckin goose!! TEEHEE FUCKING HEE I GUESS!#so for months i've been like ''god i wish i could just erase this part from the layer'' and looking at the eraser tool and just being like#''nah it's probably different and weird i'll just stick to what i know'' -> said boo boo the FOOL#see i could be in the club but i'd rather be aggressively neurodivergent about the silly queer demon cartoon that altered my brain chemical
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For the ask game: AU where during Tim's search for Bruce, Ra's agrees to help him on one condition: Tim will sleep with him. (It's probably some kind of scheme on Ra's part.) How their dynamic would change with more overt sexual undertone underlying their interactions...
for the ask game!
UGH i love this type of thing so much. in my heart, this is canon. to me. Ra'sTim my fucked up beloveds you two are so terrible for each other.
so what i think is fun and often misunderstood in fanon is that Tim didn't go to Ra's, Ra's went to Tim. so it's even more fun if Ra's goes to Tim, and has that condition he holds over Tim's head. offering all of Ra's' resources, full access to his computers, someone just genuinely believing Tim and working with him. i think, a lot of it would be a mind game for Ra's. sure he wants to fuck Tim, but more than that, he wants to see Tim's reaction. he expects an immediate no, in the way Tim is so hesitant to work with Ra's in the first place. he's pushing Tim's buttons and basically treating Tim like a rat in a maze. so when Tim says yes, and doesn't seem to hesitate too much. *that's* intriguing. because in a perfect world for Ra's, Tim says yes because of a genuine returned attraction. but Ra's isn't quite sure if that's the reason. it could just be because of Tim's search for Bruce. so Ra's would really push it, see how far he could take the sex. it's simple sex first, but Ra's gets more and more interesting each time. slowly working in kinks just to see where Tim draws the line in the sand, and if Ra's can convince Tim to cross that line.
on Tim's side, i think it's fun if you play with Tim being so deep in the closet he doesn't even realize he's bisexual, yet. so to him, sex with Ra's doesn't *really* count as sex. he knows Ra's is weirdly obsessed with him, and Tim wants to play that to his advantage. he likes the power that obsession gives him, within the League. so, if it takes some sex to satiate Ra's, Tim mentally views it as like, a training session. no worse than those unpleasant endurance trainings Bruce used to make them all do. and i like the accidental catch-22 of it. where at first, the sex does very little for Tim. but the more Ra's gets creative and kinky about it, the more Tim *actually* starts to enjoy it. Tim's bisexual crisis except it's over a centuries-old man showing him the joys of sadomasochism in an agreement that was supposed to be totally normal for Tim bc he just gets himself into these situations.
i think one of the biggest changes would be Tim's sheer amount of power and immunity in the League would be even higher. *everyone* can tell Ra's is fucking Tim, he's not really trying to hide it with the way he looks at Tim and touches him in front of everyone. Tim tries to stay clinical and professional, but you can only look so respected working when Ra's is basically stroking your chest as you work. there are whispers, people keep tellin Ra's not to trust this random son of the Bat, but no one will say it to Tim's face. it'd give Tim more power over Ra's' operation outside of the Bruce search. sure, Tim can't change the nature of the League of Assassins, but he can. tip the scales a bit. pull Ra's back from being lethal in certain situations, convince Ra's not to engage in other places. Tim is careful not to overextend this power so he doesn't lose it, but everyone else sees just how much power Tim has. he even start working on taking people out from under Ra's, when Tim goes nuclear and leaves. like how Tim basically steals Prudence, he steals some other younger Assassins he thinks he can convince to come to his side. because he's with Ra's, he starts to command a level of respect so it's not a difficult thing to do. sure, Tim's just the kid keeping Ra's' bed warm. but also, he's the kid *Ra's* deemed worthy enough to be involved with, so it's a double-edged sword of both disgust and respect held for Tim.
it's so funny to me if Tim starts to catch feelings. Ra's of course has feelings, but Tim has never noticed his feelings for a man before so he's fucking panicking internally. and worse, he's not doing a good job of hiding it. Ra's is perceptive and has centuries of experience on Tim. so he can tell. he sees the look on Tim's face when Ra's does a genuine romantic gesture with no strings attached. and that's when Ra's really leans into it. the sex is one thing, but now it's courting. gifts, pet names, kisses, praise, the whole nine yards. and Tim doesn't outwardly deny any of it because he just... doesn't know what to do with it. he could handle stupidly good sex. but this?? this is new territory. he's constantly reminding himself Ra's isn't a good person. which isn't hard to do but still, Tim's just a little torn internally. also. i think Ra's would at least try to kill Captain Boomerang, if not outright succeed, as a courting present for Tim. and Tim is *horrified*, but then again, in canon, he almost personally killed Boomerang. so maybe. there's something nice about having Boomerang dead, while escaping culpability. Ra's thinks his corruption crusade is working on Tim and is absolutely gloating about it. they even go on a proper date.
but, in the end, Tim still backstab Ra's. i think Ra's would still try to go for control of WI, but would be convinced Tim would be totally okay with it and offers to share control with Tim. that's how Tim betrays him, he's allowed to handle so much of the paperwork, Ra's has no idea until it all goes through that he actually has no control. it's The betrayal. because Tim will always betray his love for what he thinks is the right thing to do. the infamous scene, where Ra's kicks Tim out of a window would go a lot differently. instead of a dramatic fight, it's deeply wounded betrayal. in canon Ra's always knew Tim was never in his pocket, but in this AU, he was naive enough to fall for it. and he's angry. he's angry at Tim, angry at himself. i think he'd straight up try to kidnap Tim. less "kick Tim out a window" and more "intimately hold a knife to Tim's throat" vibes. they part ways, but there's still. something lingering. the bridge isn't fully burned and Ra's is still going to seek out Tim when he needs help, and Tim will seek out Ra's. they'll never trust each other again. but they also can't seem to stop loving each other. Tim hides it from the Batfamily and Ra's never gives Tim that level of control in the League again but. the "i didn't know who else to got to." moments are inevitable and there are whispers in the villain community about how you better be careful around Red Robin because if you're not, you'll piss off the Demon Head. unspoken, deadly protection while still sort of trying to kill each other.
#necrotic festerings#ask game#rastim#ra'stim#ra's al ghul x tim drake#nsft#nonnie i'm so sorry i took a day to get to this#i got wiped the fuck out by life kjhgjhkj#i was purposefully vague with how kinky the kinky sex gets for the sake of it still being appealing to everyone#but if it were me writing it i *would* get into some really weird niche kinks.#go balls to the walls with it#also i need everyone to know that rolling in the deep by adele is THE rastim song to me.#like that song is just. exactly the red robin (2009) arc. the way tim betrays ra's and ra's' anger.#“you're gonna wish you never had met me” come on now#it makes me ill#if i wrote this fic the title WOULD be a lyric from the song idc if it's cringe#it just makes me feral aaaa#love these two so dearly i need to write a real fic for them#i've got some stuff knocking around the drafts but nothing with bite.#and this idea could be the thing with bite#i just have SO many things to work on send fucking help
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Ink October day 29.5: Heir (version 2)
One who receives or is expected to receive a heritage, as of ideas, from a predecessor.
A person who succeeds or is in line to succeed to a hereditary rank, title, or office.
#Standing Unions au#khux#khux Ventus#kh skuld#kh ephemer#kh lauriam#kh brain#kh strelitzia#kh sora#kingdom hearts#kh#kh au#kh ventus#blue boi draws#ink october#ink october 2024#ink October 2024 day 29#standing unions au my beloved!!! basically digital daybreak town survives and the dandelion leaders stay and are immortal also#Ventus never got split BUT there was a situation where his heart got pretty badly damaged and he ended up in Destiny Islands#where baby Sora still reaches out to help! The gang find Ventus and bring him back to daybreak and no one figures out what happened#until after Ventus is healed enough to wake up. they bring him on a vacation to Destiny Islands because he’s not all there yet and they run#into bby Sora who recognises Ventus somehow and they put two and two together and figure this kid had something to do with Ven’s miraculous#recovery. they get permission from his parents to bring him back to DBT to scan his heart to confirm it and yup. they were right.#Sora grows up bopping between Destiny and Daybreak,as they insist on him having checkups because this has never happened before and they#want to monitor it. Sora grows up with the whole Dandelion leader gang as sorta Aunts and Uncles to him and doesn’t really get how weird#this whole thing is. Ventus is the one who’s basically his guardian when he’s in daybreak and so is seen with him a lot and it low key#starts a rumor that Sora is his kid. this both is and isn’t true Ventus isn’t his parent but Sora is Ventus’ kid in a loving familial way#you know how it is. don’t worry about it that’s his little guy#Sora is the closest thing to a ‘kid’ any of the Leaders have at this point in time so they all spoil him rotten lol. Your kid? our kid now.#this is not the first time this has happened and it will not be the last. honestly this au has so much to it this is just some Sora stuff
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#stardom#stardom wrestling#hazuki#maika#joshi puroresu#stardomedit#wrestlingedit#5star grand prix#5star gp#5star grand prix 2024#ogifs#owrestling#them having the same nail polish coming into this match..........women.#maika was having soooo much fun in the 5star like shes cheesing her way through each match#and so did hazuki! but she'd go from taunting and cocky and belittling in matches with people she deemed beneath her#to this like desperate manic thing when she really wanted it#ie vs konami maika and natsupoi#that natsupoi match was so good too omg..#i really hope hazuki gets a big build SOON 😑. get the white belt on her NOW.#but with the goddess league coming up and fwc doing some other tag match in another promotion soon#hazuki might be focused on tag team stuff for the next bit#i do want her to get her licks in against h.a.t.e. i looove that she's so pissed off at konami for it#auggh and if it bubbles into some interactions with tora. <33333#god their dream tag from a couple years ago was SO fascinating....... i love them sm what a weird juicy dynamic#id in alt btw mwah
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So there was a post a while back about Ben Solo always being told "don't do (x), that's how uncle luke lost his hand" when he was a kid - and I raise you: Elrond and Elros being told "don't do (x), that's how Maedhros lost his hand"??
Like, at Amon Ereb when the twins were newly acquired and refusing to eat their vegetables and Maglor is Mag-mothering them until Erestor, feral half-sane clinically depressed anarchist Avari hostage/patient/infiltrator and Certified Little Shit, hits em with:
"I would listen to the Lord Maglor, winyamor, he well knows the dangers that come to young elflings who don't eat enough vegetables - after all, that's how his brother lost his hand."
Elrond looks conflicted. Elros squints suspiciously. "Truly?"
Erestor, practically comatose since the massacre but ultimately saved from Fading by the biological compulsion to fuck with you, lays a hand over his heart. "I would never lie about such a thing! Just what do you take me for? This is a true tale and a grave warning - the Lord Maedhros' hand was tragically lost in the days of his youth, whilst he was still growing as you are. He refused to eat his vegetables and so, cruelly deprived of the strength it needed to grow strong, his body started to fall apart! First his fingers, then his thumb, and then his palm and wrist - all turned blue and dropped off!"
"No!" Elrond gasps. Elros looks both terrified and impressed. Maglor's face is scrunched up into something that the twins probably interpret as pained - at reminder of the horrors of limbs falling off! - but is actually just him busting a rib trying not to laugh.
"Yes!" Erestor cries with relish. "And it never grew back. All because he didn't eat his vegetables. Isn't that right, Lord Maedhros?"
Maedhros, a looming terror at the head of the table, scarred and solemn and impenetrable as his fortresses, narrows his eyes consideringly at the unfolding shenanigans and the rascal behind it. His conclusion? Fuck it. He gives a slow, solemn nod. Completely deadpan and exaggeratedly formal, because it may have been centuries since he last had his brothers smothering laughter at political dinners but the Finwëan sense of humour, once caught, is not an ailment easily cured.
Maglor conceals his wheezes behind his goblet as Erestor nods sagely to the wide-eyed twins, who suddenly seem a sight more interested in their vegetables.
#it helps that maedhros also has a metric fuck ton of scars so he can make up so much shit#know how i lost my eye? didnt go to bed on time and it shrivelled up#why do i have to wear a shoulder brace sometimes? didn't practice my letters and the bones all fell apart#where'd my fingernails go? didnt wash my hands before eating and they ran away#why is my back all stripy with criss-cross lines? didnt use my cutlery and they attacked me#why are some of my teeth metal? cause i didnt clean em properly for two minutes with mint ointment and i accidentally ate them in my sleep#whys there grey bits in my hair? didnt bathe after running around in the woods and the cobwebs got stuck and never came out#what happened to my ears? ducked underneath a horse and it spooked and bit them off so never ever do that again elros its very dangerous ok#i dont care your ears are smaller because youre peredhel elros the horse will get you#whys my hair so short? didnt comb it so it was stolen by orcs now hand me the brush and get over here elrond your head's a birdnest#for all that the kid's questions sometimes make maedhros a lil uncomfortable its actually really healing for him#sure sauron whipped him until his spine broke but now he uses those marks to get his kids to eat with cutlery like civilised people#and he cut his hair in a depressive spiral after fingon died but his kids think it was so tangled the orcs stole it to make scruffy orc wig#and his shoulders fucked from hanging on thangondrim for decades but if you kids dont sit down and do your lessons then so help me -#his beloved fingon always kissed his scars when he was allowed but it was witty irreverent half insane erestor who helped him laugh at them#i kind of ship it in a 'secret third thing' kinda way u feel me? not sex not friends but they bring a lot out of eachother its weird#erestor#maedhros#kidnap fam#elrond and elros#maglor#there is a fic that goes with this who wants it
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it doesnt need to be said but its genuinely so funny how at-the-hip charles and erik are in krakoa like they really had the green light- the OBLIGATION- to be as obnoxiously close to each other as possible and abused that right to the fullest extent
#xmen#xmen comic#krakoa#cherik#snap chats#until the divorce of course but until then its actually so funny#how you really couldnt go a page or two without one or the other and the other one was close behind#ice climber ass duo over here. the delightful children from down the lane kind of proximity what the fuck was their PROBLEM#i feel like if one of them was teleported the other would just materialize right next to them thats how close they were#fuuuck what was the issue where sabretooth and co are in like. Brain Prison or something#and victor imagines charles but everyones like 'wait its weird if its just him where's magneto'#ITS SO FUCKING FUNNY and i NEED to know what issue that was .... to add it to my collection ....#also killed me how in immoral x-men issue 1 charles was yappin bout erik bein gone#and- God Bless Who i forget i think it was hope- was just 'can you please shut up about your dead boyfriend im begging you'#moira stronger than me if i had to deal with thing 1 and thing 2 on a daily basis i woulda snapped sooner frankly#ig when you live ten times through The Most Bullshit ever youre numb to most things but still. my god theyre so obnoxious#sorry im cackling at the bit in HoX where charles is about to announce krakoa to the world and erik's putting his hand on his shoulder#and you justs see moira in the back like dawgggg right in front of her .... can you two get a room#GENUINELY no im GENUINELY surprised they dont share a bedroom#im not even talking sharing a bed im taking my shipper goggles off im actually baffled they dont sleep in the same building#obvi id be lyin if i said i didnt love it tho To Be Real .. genuinely love seein them work together as a team .. until they werent </3#in every timeline they WILL divorce each other that's just the rule. actual canon event it cannot be changed or stopped its integral#ok ramble over. but not really not in spirit cause ill never be over this ill die before i am#im gonna go eat now i think i think thats something i As A Human has to do at least once a day
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do you think the reason agatha’s trial felt weird is because she was the only one who did not actually buy into the mythos of the road since she knew the truth? like that was why no perspective change and all the other reasons why people thought it was a fake trial
#agatha all along#aaa spoilers#txt#i really liked the idea behind how the witches road came to be#like showing her and nicky coming up with the lyrics and everything#but i felt like there was a lot of these last two episodes that felt weird or jarring#i think that’s partly the fault of it being such a short run time for the whole show in general (tbh that’s probably like most of it)#but there were just also weird choices? idk#like jen’s big declaration about protecting them in honor of Lilia or w.e and then just.. flying off to nowhere??#or the way Both billy and agatha kept switching how they felt about each other with like every sentence#I did really like her thing where she helped him get tommy a body though#and her and rios vibes were off too. like it felt like there should have been a little more build up before they fought after the road?#like when they were still talking on the road it felt like they could have done more with it#just like jen getting her powers back could have been more#or billy standing up for agatha could have been more#billy’s homecoming and attempting to banish agatha too#I liked that his parents were there but it was so quick and then he just.. leaves again?? no problem?? and I guess they’re fine with it now#like it felt like the things they did well. they did really well#while everything else felt.. idk.. kinda flat?#which honestly was the same feeling I had after watching agatha’s trial episode#honestly this show need at least another 3 or 4 episodes if not more#and I know people are going to make this all about agatha and rio but i really don’t think that’s the issue#i do think the story could have benefited more from showing more of their actual backstory or a few more interactions with them or just#like i said earlier done more with what they had. again that scene on the road before rio dips could have been used way more effectively#and I don’t mean in like having them be soft or lovey like I know a lot of people wanted (never be against that) but I don’t think it was#needed.. but Something was??#i feel like overall what everyone went through on the road didn’t actually truly effect them or change them?#like jen left. agatha and rio were like back to liek the road never happened. everyone else but billy is dead#i think the only person who was truly changed was maybe billy?#which makes the whole journey feel so unsatisfying? like things could still have ended the same while still showing them changed? idk
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very annoying getting into a fandom where most of the audience seems to be on the younger side. there are so many concepts that are completely normal that just seem outside the realm of possibility for a teenager to even comprehend
I see SO much "how could anyone like this character, you know he's like 40-50 right?" and "how could anyone like this character, he's fat!" and "how could you like this character, he's a villain!" and so on so forth. Like, are you new here? I can only assume yes
#ramblings#sorry for another weird vent (?) post#haha vent like (checks my notes) like amongus. right?#anyway#I promised myself I wouldn't become one of those disconnected adults that condescends to teenagers and adopts an us vs them mentality#but it's getting harder when it feels like they're making our own spaces hostile against us#I dunno I'm tired. it's like. I turned 20 and never got tiktok and now I'm completely disconnected from teenagers I feel#not really a bad thing. just annoying in certain situations. like this one#YES liking ''problematic'' characters is fine. yes liking fat characters is fine. yes liking older characters is fine. it dodsn't mattor#i thought it was bad on the internet when I was a teenager but now it's like y'all are just too comfortable straight up insulting others#(takes a long drag of a cigarette like I'm not recently 24)#(the cigarette is fake)#(i exhale but instead of smoke i just disintegrate into ashes)
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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2023 Brazilian Grand Prix - Podium - Fernando Alonso
#HE IS SO RADIANT ON THIS PODIUM I LOVUUUU HIMMMMMMMM#once all the pics get released on all the websites i think ill have mental breakdown pt 2#my roman empire is hoping someone took a pic of him holding the hat in his mouth#real ones will know about my weird obsession with confetti....fufilled today#im so annoyed they cut away when he did his jumpy mario thing#he does it every single time they should know this!!#so thank you to aston's insta for the clips#not my best quality gifs which is annoying but uhhhh i am under duress from myself LMAO#i need to make a brazil 2023 moodboard just from my deranged liveblogs cause my god#see you in Vegas!!! what a way to end a triple header wow. it really made the suffering in cota and mexico worth it#now old man better keep up this performance istg#but like seriously i could wax poetic about his defneding and overtaking in this race#it was actually unbelievable the level of skill he has#to defend against the superior rb19 for like 30~ laps and then to be able to overtake it with his much slower car??? chills.#has anyone gifed his overtake bcs my god i fell down#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#2023 brazilian gp#we do a little bit of f1
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A very normal scientist doing very normal gene splicing experiments (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Handplates#Gaster#Wobbledogs#Sometimes media flooding bleeds over into other interests at the same time and yes that is my only justification for this lol#I'm always most amused by the sequence of things lol - I'd already started in on Handplates again but then got very diverted by Wobbledogs#Which is especially weird to me because I was introduced to the game like half a year ago and it didn't really grab me#It's cute but eh it's fine - and then I watched a proper lightly edited playlist not like jumpcut-jumpcut-jumpcut#That can make for a very punchy one-off but it doesn't really reflect the gameplay loop#So actually getting to see it properly made the difference and I kinda Get It now and also kinda want to own the game lol#MeanWhile - Ghoster's been hanging out as my desktop buddy literally /while/ watching and I was getting new ideas on that front#They smushed together lol#Having him onscreen is just a good excuse to do a quick once-over style of study and follow some silly ideas haha#What would Gaster think of a progressive mutation type game ♪ Watching them grow watching them struggle to walk#Only uses the scold feature - or the worse option that he treats the dogs better than the skelebros noooo haha#Pretty much all of the creatures in Undertale are sentient to some degree aren't they :0 Wobbledogs are just dogs#They're not monsters but they're not humans but they're not exactly just dogs either - just little creachurs haha#It's fun to imagine him nurturing anyone or anything haha ♪ Goes from ''???'' to ''How can I help this reach their full potential''#Whatever ''potential'' means in his own context hehe#It's cute in its own way
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And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.
The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-
And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.
Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.
Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.
It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.
Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-
It made a bargain.
A bargain Caeru didn't take.
Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-
But. He couldn't.
Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.
Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.
So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.
And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-
Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.
Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.
And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?
All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-
-And grief.
#yin-thoughts#fallen london#fallen london spoilers#nemesis spoilers#so! nemesis huh!#i have. a lot of thoughts#overall i think heart's desire remains closest to my heart#but that's almost certainly bc of the obvious ''you always remember your first'' bias#there's a lot of problems with nemesis that have been talked to death by other people way more eloquently than i could ever express#(the big notable stopgates littered throughout. the weird pacing at the end. the fact you never meet your actual nemesis til the finale)#but overall i still liked it a lot!! i loved it actually!!! it singlehandedly made me like cups as a master!!!!#not because of anything nemesis actually DID mind you. i just really liked making up things about it#in place of nemesis. actually featuring it.#which could either be a plus or a minus against the ambition depending on what angle you look at it from#but. yeah. i'd say i enjoyed it. i enjoyed it a whole bunch#and now that ive played 2 out of the 4 ambitions and my FL hyperfixation evidently isnt letting up#it's safe to say we're all here for the long haul#tune in (insert miscellaneous time in the future) for when i finally after like a year and a quarter#get to find out what the fuck truly goes down in light fingers#and also keep an eye out for that caeru-centric fic ive been unsubtly alluding to and still need to write.#ive got a whole outline for it and it's. well#you'll all see when (if?) i finish it#i have some ideas abt how i wanna play around with the nemesis endings + what they mean to caeru#(and i do mean endings as in both of them)#and it all may seem. insane. when we get there#but i swear i have a direction plotted in my head#i swear#scoundrelventures#<- the scoundrel isnt mentioned At All in this post but that works as a general FL oc lore tag
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