#theyre both terrible people but they make me SO soft

[narriose]

Thoughts on Veilguard so far:

Preface: I’m ~50 hours in with a handful of endgame spoilers.

My general values are: Story > Characters > Gameplay > Romance > Rep > Visuals.

My rating of the previous games: DA2 > DAO > DAI

Spoilers under Cut:

What I expected: Having to deal with an unappealing art style and clunky gameplay with leftover multiplayer and live service era elements that they couldn’t get rid of for the sake of the story and characters.

What I got: Well…

Let’s Start with the negatives:

-Dialogue: I want to know what happened there. Ik for a fact they had veteran BioWare writers on the team and it feels like there was a decision to dumb everything down to the point of me immediately having a line in my head that would sound better in universe every time someone spoke. It proved especially grating once I heard Morrigan speak. And when people compare the writing to MCU I cannot really protest. “Dragon Age has always been unserious” yes but like. Not every other line was a joke or relatable™️ millennial awkwardness . When jokes did happen they became memorable moments for the fandom. It’s often very difficult to listen to. Especially when Rook talks. It is getting marginally better though.

-Tone: Dragon Age has been compelling to me because it wrote conflict and trauma and corruption in a way that felt developed enough to feel grounded and believably horrific. Even with all its faults. DATV mellowed out the horrors and seems to gloss over a lot of sociopolitical dynamics and lore. Stuff like portraying crows as vigilantes and not showing the evils of Tevinter slavery. The tone itself just feels like theyre trying to make an easily marketable sanitized IP out of it to cater to a wider audience.

-Character Writing: A lot of characterization has been “Tell not show” because I’m disappointed in Lucanis and Neve. The story says one is a serious killer and the other is a cynic but both have only been friendly soft and positive which is like??? I feel like a lot of their intro has been cut out or something where they establish those traits on screen. Another thing is: there don’t appear to be actually detestable and controversial traits in characters or even internal conflict they need to overcome. They’re just dealing with some kind of external thing thrust onto them and that is very shallow to me personally.

-Intro: I know we’re not getting Origins style personalized intros again but it felt like too much is handwaived into people making their own OCs and forming headcanons when the game doesn’t let us RP much at all outside identity stuff anyway. Like how do we know Varric? Why should any of the pep talks he gives us mean anything when we haven’t experienced anything to warrant the complements he gives us?

-Villains: possibly the worst part of the story: they lit act like theyre in a preschool cartoon down to body language. No nuance no controversy no actual horror to them when in previous games the evil felt so much more pronounced because some of the villains felt human enough to be a shitty person irl.

-Rep: Sigh. Even as a transmasc I might be a little too internally transphobic for the rep in the game. It feels like so many steps ahead of what the story should be handling. Like fix the slavery problem in a meaningful way then start philosophical gender discussions about what a gender binary even is. And it’s very cringe to me when it’s spoken about in game. Like yeah I love that there’s no way to dispute what the characters are but it also feels so entirely uncreative using modern day terminology for this stuff. And I don’t mean “replace it with ambiguous sad baby talk” but something more. Like is it terrible to want that? Even if you were planning on using the word nonbinary, at least tell us what a binary even is and how it was instituted as an idea into this world. Like I do adore Taash, I just wish the gender stuff wasn’t so clumsy.

-Visuals: It’s hard man. As an artist who sees human bodies as proportion reference points, the bodies still look off to me. Like it was worse and I’m getting used to it but it’s still painful. And I’m all for trying to stylize but this particular heroforge direction was not something I would have picked.

-OST: At first I couldn’t tell Zimmer/Balfe’s stuff apart from Morris’s but yeah, the new stuff is more boring(Sans the Rivain part)

-The 3 choice thing: yeah not a fan of that. I feel like perhaps it was a part of the multiplayer era where they would not be able to import much if everyone had a massively different world state so they limited it to the tiny MC choices. Still sad that the romance thing only really matters if you romanced Solas because the Dorian cameo wasn’t anything to write home about. Kinda feels like they added him in last minute because someone pointed out how much Solas-skewed the choices were. Idk. I so expected Josie in Antiva but alas.

Now Onto the Positives:

-Codices: The very way-too modern simplified conversational dialogue style carries over to the codices. And while I despise that as a creative, I do find myself actually reading them as they come because they are so easy to absorb. I feel like a lot of people would benefit from not skipping them because there are some references and plot reveals worth checking out.

-Story: If you deafen the dialogue style, the story itself is top. Gets way better as you play and from the spoilers I’ve heard, yeah. It’s good. Can’t wait to find out more.

-Gameplay: Listen I have a massive preference for DA style combat even if most ppl call it a slog. The turn based element, the pause button, the hoarding skills I never use. It’s like coming home to me. I hated DAI combat for the amount of anxiety it induced and I usually hate fast-paced action combat in most other games. DATV made me eat my boots. Its combat is insanely fun and engaging and often times I’m looking forward to fights more than quests themselves. Very colorful, very flashy, and very effective. The pause button gives less freedom but it’s there. The combos are fun. It is like Mass Effect except I did not find commanding the companions in Mass Effect as intuitive. Tho I wish non mages had less magicey feeling attacks.

-The CC: Yeah it wowed me with the options. I like how much can be done with the facial sliders and how good the hair looks.

-Puzzles: Listen the puzzles are extremely stupid in this game. But I also am very stupid and lazy when it comes to solving them. I have looked up the vast majority of puzzle solutions for DA games. No more DA2 Fade Barrels and no more trying to circumnavigate the ad infested Fandom Wiki to get to the Kitty’s prison solution. Crafted specifically for me.

-Mechanical Things: The game is optimized insanely well. Both when It comes to your PC and the gameplay. I’m amazed how well it runs on my PC when games like BG3 and Cyberpunk make my CPU scream. Love that. As far as gameplay goes: everything is super streamlined and designed to be as un-annoying as possible. No carry weight, no collectibles as annoying and unrewarding as the shards and mosaics. The maps are easy to parse. The game does not bombard you with useless NPCs, banter can’t be interrupted and characters catch up on banter at the Lighthouse if you’ve been avoiding certain party comps by accident. The quest locator is actually helpful. Skill points can be refunded. Looting is easy and finding shit feels rewarding.

-Characters: Honestly they do have some interesting things going on and while most characters feel a little hollow so far, I was pleasantly surprised by Davrin and Bellara. Davrin is the one I’m romancing and while the actual romance isn’t groundbreaking I’m glad I chose him. Yes, his character has a lot to do with Assan and his arc, but he does have stuff going on of his own. He’s very refreshing because some of the things he says low key both makes you think and also worry about him. He’s also not your usual preppy jock type. He can be a little mean sometimes. He’s artistic and principled. He has some remnants of “opinions I don’t agree with” that I love early DA for. When it comes to Bellara, she absolutely breaks the sort of Manic Pixie/Quirky Awkward young coded girl mold. It is the fact that there is self awareness and hints of history of failure and isolation in her words. There is also masking and over-clarification that I can relate to personally. I hope there is stuff like that to other companions when I get to know them better.

Visuals: the UI and Locations are stunning. The outfits the best the game has had so far(tho wish the overall look was less stylized) The blighted stuff(sans the ogres) and the Crossroads. Beautiful.

-Dwarf Lore: started out as fucking cheesy but I just finished meeting Valta and I’m seated.

-Solas Stuff: Hated the man for a while. Caved and made a solavellan to import to get more story stuff. NGL he is actually tolerable/interesting to me in this game.

Overall: A sickly sweet combo of Disappointed and Impressed. And I’m still gonna be playing. I am used to not liking something about every DA game. That’s part of the fun for me. But damn is this one testing me. Am I having a lot of fun playing it? Absolutely. Am I finding it difficult to get through a concerning amount of dialogue…yeah. It does still feel like a DA game but also like if someone made a pg-13 live action of Inquisition and then made a supplementary game based off that. If I forget that it’s supposed to be a sequel and just treat it like an action game with plot then it’s easier. And like I’m sure at least half of what I listed as a negative can be attributed to EA meddling or prev iterations of the game being inseparable. Anyway. Can’t wait to see the ending and I will add more thoughts when I’m done.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Father, Cuppa Joe, and Spankulot x reader with animal mutations

Something something, was thinking about fibb and wink then had a brain blast something something

Notes: reader is GN, animal parts change for each character, established relationship, the mutations were caused by the KND through unknown means

CWs: none

father

if anything it makes him hate the knd even more than he already did before- ESPECIALLY if you receive your animal traits after meeting/beginning to date father

you get cat traits, which.. isnt terrible but hes still angry

sometimes loosely holds your tail in his hands and runs his fingers through the fur, more likely to do this if you purposefully brush it against him while he's trying to do something

subconsciously scritches your ears when you're both sitting together doing... anything, really. reading, watching a movie or show, or just simply sitting next to one another- he does it when you two cuddle as well

if the fur you gained is soft, he finds himself running his hands through it, its almost like a stress reliever for him... lord knows he needs it given his temper

cuppa joe

okay hear me out, ferret reader! every time i see ferrets, theyre always so high energy! so if you mirror that you can keep up with joe! whether it be from you being you, or from your mutations.. it comes in handy when interacting with your boyfriend when hes up and active

loves messing with your ears, sometimes gently smooshes your face with his hands when he gets to see you after a long and hard day or working

does this count as cuteness aggression?

if you want to find a way to change yourself back hes going to work up the funds to find and hire someone who can, definitely seeks out fellow villains to make it happen

sucks because he thinks you look so cute, but he understands if this isnt something you want

spankulot

it should come as a shock to absolutely no one that im choosing a bat reader for the count!

sleeps upside down with you, you each have your own spaces on the ceiling to sleep!

loves wrapping his cloak around you whenever the opportunity comes up, but he would go absolutely insane if you wrapped your wing around him

it doesnt take him long to realize that you werent simply born with your traits- rest assured if he finds the specific people responsible for it hes going to make sure justice is served

he thinks your fangs are cute, they match his

[intertexts]

OKAY NHW THOUGHTS. SUFFER WITH ME !!!!

having a lot of thoughts and feelings as always about how virion sees himself as the one who has to be strong, who has to be the one to protect the other two . dakota may have had his powers for longer, but virion has more field experience. he's been trained how to fight his whole life. his family prepared him for this since the day he could stand on his own two feet. it's so deeply ingrained into him, he knows the ins and outs of cape politics, and while he may be an outsider in new haven he had plenty of experience in fauna and how much different can the two cities really be? I feel like he's faaaar less trustful of the heroes, can kind of see through their bullshit when it happens, but he doesn't make a move because now he has a team, now he has people he loves again, and he would do anything to keep them safe even if that means putting up with bureaucratic nonsense. he's got that vigilante blood in him!!! idk how long he was on his own but even if it was as short as a few months that's still PLENTY of time to pick up terrible habits in the name of keeping on his toes, keeping himself safe. gotta keep moving constantly. can't sleep for more than a few hours at a time, and the sleep he does get is VERY light. only ever wearing dark clothes and covering his face even out of costume. constantly keeping at least one concealed weapon on him. being SO hyperaware of any sound or sudden movement in the general vicinity. when hes with the other two he always places himself in the middle between them so he can easily grab both of them if he needs to. maybe walking a half step behind them to watch their backs. always situates himself with clear view of any doors/windows whenever theyre in an enclosed space. etc etc you see my vision!!!!!

im just thinking abt like... the first time william and dakota see him Without All That Tension. he probably looks like a totally different person! the whole time they've known him he's been this stoic quiet intimidating presence, he always stays awake longer than either of them so they've never seen him sleep. after one too many all-nighter volunteer patrols he passes on pizza for dinner and gets home before either of them. when they walk in later (leftover pizza for him ofc) and see him passed out fast asleep on the couch it almost takes them a second to recognize him . who is this.. soft faced *boy* curled up in a loose ball facing the door in their living room!! what if this is where williams crush really kicks in and becomes Real- he desperately wants to be able to make virion comfortable enough around him to make him look like that again. william is just frozen in the doorway staring at him, studying him, trying to commit the whole scene to memory, so dakota is the one who steps forward to put a blanket over him. virion wakes up IMMEDIATELY at this and the moment is kind of broken and he thanks them for the pizza and everything's back to normal but now they KNOW. do you SEE my vision here.

I hope ur malaise is a little better sorry this took me like an hour and a half to type i had 2 keep pausing bc I was getting emotional thinking about them auaghaguyghh

ohh having so many emotions about him.... yeah..... yeah..... the cape world is all he's ever known! of course he's more experienced, cynical, knows the procedures and conventions and lies better than they do. he's maybe the only one of them who's killed before. i think it fucks him UP to realize he loves william & dakota. how can he trust them? he does, he can't choose not to, but i think he's very scared for a very long time that they're going to betray him like his father betrayed his friends. "they sound like they really mean it" yeah well. so did his dad!! honestly i think it's a kind of let it happen situation. he thinks about it for a while and goes well. it's not like i have anything else. this, right now, is nice, so if i end up dead in my sleep about it? whatever. i like them. they're allowed. he's constantly waiting in the back of his mind for the cold gun to the back of his head while theyre hugging or a knife to his throat on the couch during a movie or for them to detour into a dark alley while they're walking somewhere. and it takes a very long time for him to lose this mindset. it would fuck the other two UP if they knew but he's very good at hiding it, both the fear & the decision to just let them do it, if they want to. virion sol willing vulnerability looks like anyone else's efficient dangerous capability and hypervigilance. (i think they Should find out that their best friend is always waiting for them to kill him. that would be a lot.)

anyway. distracted!! in my mind he was a rogue for at least, like, around a year. so much time for bad habits to sink in! the thing ive been thinking about is like, he never really had to be subtle? he's so good at disappearing into nowhere & being a sneaky ass creep on the job, he's alright at lying and social engineering if there was a situation where it was necessary, but he never like... had a civilian life! to him it was fine if he was mostly perceived as a thug or a contractor or just as suspicious as "deftly moving masked figure in black checking all the entrances to the coffee shop as he sits down or buying zip ties and gorilla tape and kerosene at lowes" implies. so like i think their manager or boss or handler has to go "hey dude you need to like. Not be walking exactly a step behind your friends checking your surroundings wherever u go. please stop moving like you're getting ready for a fight. it directs so much attention to u u are in high school ur supposed to be a kid ur setting off so many red flags!"& he doesn't really get it. and it's a thing.

ill over everything ur saying here btw!!!! actually fucked up over them seeing him without all those walls and facades & constant tension!! oh christ!! he's so intimidating even when he's not trying and knows so much and is so good at what they do-- he's. actually their age? he's really just some teenager like them? the crackling anxiety and hypervigilance aren't, just, like, part of him? all the tense lines and angles of him soften into just-- something normal and loose and comfortable?? that fic when???

[crimeronan]

'women just make me feel safe and happy for some reason even when theyre terrible murderers :)' is killing me. She's not even like, 'Wow, women are so soft and gentle and don't do anything wrong,' she is FULLY 'I just think they're neat :)'

SCREAM. YEAH

(about this post)

ruby has literally WATCHED both devin and sol kill people. she has watched UNSPEAKABLE ACTS OF VIOLENCE AND TORTURE she has NOOOOO REASON TO FEEL SAFE WHATSOEVER around EITHER of these transparently fucking crazy people

sol is out here like "my unquenchable bloodlust drives me to hunt real actual living breathing people for real actual sport" devin's chillin' like "my gay-ass magic powers can and will rip people limb from fucking limb on my behalf and i'm gonna do exactly zero things to stop it" and ruby's like "wow...... these are my wives who i feel so safe and warm around :) neither of them have ever done anything wrong in their entire lives :)" like GIRL. GIRL YOUR TASTE IN PARTNERS. GIRL YOU NEED HELPPP

[skinmite]

stede and ed are in their own little world

theyre both terrible captains. and that makes their relationship with the crew completely fucked. the captain is responsible for ensuring the safety and wellbeing of the crew and neither of them are being shown to give a shit.

eds relationship with his crew hasnt evolved at all from when we first meet him. izzy tells him several crew members died carrying out eds orders to find stede. and eds like “well thats thats their job” then “edward if you dont do something were all were ALL gonna die” “hm theres an idea”. hes very experienced and intelligent but that doesnt help when youre reckless and working as an individual while still taking the title of leader. & not keeping people alive. i kept waiting for him to have any growth there but there was nothing. i wanted it so bad but nah. he said sorry to izzy only. cares about him but hasnt had anything with the rest of the crew. he needed moments individually to make amends i think

stedes relationship with his crew got way worse than it was in s1. he was always captaining when he shouldnt have been and responsible for their lives while leading them into danger beyond his ability to ensure their safety but at least he seemed like he cared about their happiness and saying “talk it through”. like there was room for improvement but he went the other way. with s2 its all become so hollow now. he just doesnt care about their feelings if ed is responsible for hurting them. stede not caring At All about lucius being alive was interesting to me. hes kinda just selfish. he sees only ed on an equal level to him and out of the whole crew only izzy really its true. he hasnt had much one-on-one with anyone else.

and then after ed tried to kill half the crew/kill people the other half of the crew love. and all decided their Feelings are “kick him off”. stede still chose ed. they always choose eachother over the crew. and Yeah it makes sense theyre in love. but theyre captains of a pirate ship with a huge target on all of them. but only looking out for the other one. the crew sees how theyre treated. theyre dissatisfied but resigned to their fates. the whole “eh whatever. the captains always get away with it and we just deal with what they put us through” conversation. and really Dont see those two as family at this point lets be real. ed and stede are too focused on each other to be a family to anyone except ed and stede. its true izzy is the only other family member you had it accurate the first time.

they could have changed that if any effort was put in at all but they havent gotten to that point. “oh these people love you oh theyre your family” you cant just write that in and have the crews actions this whole time leading up to that contradict it. just untrue. maybe it being the dying wish of someone who they did actually consider family helped their relationship? a little bit? izzy still picking up eds slack. but then in the end the crew just seem happier without ed and stede. those two arent team players they act as individuals. lone wolf

and thats FINE but not on a ship. having stede give them that push at the beginning of the show was great. to crack their shell a little bit is what started the crews overall growth and im sure they care a little bit about stede for that. and theyre soft people i know they have a lingering connection to them. but they have Not “talked it through” theyre literally “bottling it up” it sucks. theres hope but ed and stede have to reach out but they simply havent. really the way the show is written was the crew-minus-captains becoming family together and ed & stede going off on their own. unfortunate but its just the content of the show. i have a lot of thoughts about this im probably missing something. but the captains/crew relationship was so disappointingly lacking

[mithliya]

Same Anon re: butch rep or lack thereof in queer love ultimatum:

Do you have a link/tag for your posts about the show? I didn’t see the butch rep post and I’d love read what other radfems think. I scrolled back but couldn’t find it.

And yeah I agree pretty much everyone except Xander, yoly (although she’s not 100% innocent,) and Sam suck to varying degrees, I only singled Vanessa out because the ask was about gender identities and Vanessa identifies as pansexual instead of lesbian. I felt bad for the other lesbians because they were to my knowledge, lesbians attracted to women, but technically dating self admitted non-women. Toxicity/drama wise, I pretty much agree with the general consensus on Mildred/Lexi/Rae/Aussie/tiff/Vanessa so I’m not going to add anything abt them.

My only unpopular opinion is about mal. Mal doesn’t necessarily suck per say, I think she’s a decent person and she’s super fine. but like Vanessa, her sudden reversal into wanting to propose seems motivated by wanting to “win,” instead of a genuine desire to commit to yoly. The fact that she suddenly started picking up after herself around the house shows she was capable of doing it all along but was content to let yoly pick up after her. The way she is motivated by wanting to win is a lot less obvious and less malicious than Vanessa, because she does care about yoly to some degree and she might not even consciously realize her motives. But I don’t think her intentions are genuine, I think she’s a real smooth talker towards both Lexi, yoly, and the camera/audience. I empathize with her a lot because I’m a poc lesbian (femme Indonesian though, not black butch,) and if a white woman showed up with a real chance of taking my girlfriend away I’d be feeling all types of old insecurities and might feel the overwhelming urge to win. I might be reading into it, but I just think if everyone wants to call Vanessa out for her sudden change of heart, it might be good to acknowledge that Mal is kind of doing something similar, but a lot less clumsily. I know she said she eventually wanted to get married after her finances were taken care of, but after the finance conversation w/yoly, I’m a bit suspicious about whether she was actually taking concrete steps to make that reality happen, or if she was using that as a delaying excuse. I would hate for her and her bestie to spin the narrative that yoly was some sort of gold digger who abandoned Mal to fall in love with Xander’s financial statements, because it kind of looked like they were implying that in the last episode. I had a soft spot for Mal, but I think I if the threat of xander were to go away, Mal would go back to her old, not-picking-up, marriage and kids delaying self.

this was my post about it. no one besides me rly shared their thoughts on that tho, to me i just thought it was concerning and indicative of a larger trend & commonly held idea nowadays that gnc = u must be non-binary or trans somehow. it all goes back to "cis = you identify as the gender you were born as" and gender simply being the societally & culturally ascribed roles based on ur sex... based on that logic ofc butch lesbians would not fit in and ofc many gnc people dont "feel" like theyre women (if female) or men (if male) but rather simply exist in the body that theyre in and dont conform to the gender roles pushed onto them.

i actually rly thought tiff was terrible at first but surprisingly, out of the bunch shes not the worst. definitely aussie (big disappointment. was into her at first), vanessa (also disappointment. shes rly beautiful too), mildred, and lexie are the ones i really didnt like. i loved mal, xander, & rae the most. im at a stage where im not 100% sure about yoly i mean she seems really lovely but the fact that mal expressed these insecurities holding her back from marriage & yoly basically confirmed every single one of them was like. really sad to see. and seeing mal cry so much was heartbreaking too ? like poor baby mal i want to just hug her and find a way to cheer her up.

i do agree w u tho that mal wanting to get married doesnt make much sense. i mean yoly basically confirmed every fear mal had that was keeping her from getting married to begin with!! if that were me id be like hell no im not proposing to u, if my main concerns were 1. im not financially ready and 2. my partner falls in love with everyone quickly and in the same way so why would *i* be the one, and then my partner went and proved she wants someone with more money + falls in love so fast (2 WEEKS!?!??) then id just say no way maam! we'll get married when u address my concerns! BUT that said, u made some decent points. i also was skeptical of the sudden flip to wanting to get married to yoly & the sudden meeting all of yoly's desires, like when someone is acting that way u rly dont know if theyre genuinely that way or if theyre just doing it to win. im skeptical of those things being consistent things too.

i got a similar sense to u there but also i generally just dont believe anyone is 100% genuine on the show, maybe the most genuine has been rae or even yoly bc yoly has been pretty direct & open w her feelings despite the issues it was causing. xander seems sweet but i definitely thought it was odd that she told yoly shes in love w her and then when vanessa asked she said she doesnt love yoly .. oh also sam is just amazing. i loved seeing her grow enough to stand up for herself and speak up unapologetically. i was super disappointed by aussie tbh she was like one of the women i was rly rooting for bc idk asian butches just have my heart bc they make me think of my lovely gf yanno but she rly let me down and was imo the absolutely worst of the bunch, even tho the one who would get shit on all the time is vanessa (who i think is not even as bad)

also lexie is annoying as hell and i think rae should dump her bc i was just getting some red flags from how lexie was acting ngl

[mercurypyrite]

ok so i finished book 6 last night so this is a bit belated but whatever. longass masterpost of my thoughts on everything post 6-81 incoming

i felt awful for vil (3hrs of crying, he’s gotta be dehydrated) but it was lowkey kinda funny how malleus just popped up and was like “i’m in your debt (according to lilia) (pretty sure this was just for their own amusement?? idk man they’re fae) so i’ll help 👍” and just kinda poofed him back to normal.

i think this is the… third time we’ve seen him do smth like that? first at VDC, then during endless halloween night, and finally now. (though EHN came first canonically.) he seems to be making a habit of it. and that joyful squeal? love that. (vil’s normally so poised, though — goes to show how deeply book 6, and being rudely confronted by his fear of aging, rattled him)

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leona: i’ve been fighting all night and i’m dead on my feet

ruggie & jack: sorry what. PLEASE elaborate

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once i saw adeuce the only thought left in my head was “MY BOYS THEYRE HERE” i’m so glad they’re okay like damn. it feels like everyone’s been gone longer than 2 days lmao

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“Human lives are as ethereal as silk thread on a spinning wheel — and just as easily cut short. But their fragility can be a boon. Interweaving and layering those threads creates the strong, resilient tapestry of their history. Such is the creature called man — neighbor to we creatures of the night.”

so so tempted to make part of this my blog quote but it sounds so pretentious. not like the current one isn’t i guess. also sleeping beauty ref goes brrr

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ortho (lovingly) dragging idia is one of my new favorite things i think

“You don’t have any close friends who can keep you in line yet, and I don’t know if you ever will. Not to put too fine a point on it, but leaving you to your own devices is a terrible idea. So… I want to stay with you. Is that asking too much?”

“You’ve been my real brother for a long time now, Ortho.”

“Let’s go back to Night Raven College. You’ve got people waiting for you there.”

“…Yeah, I do, huh.”

LIKE GOD. THEM. i want to stay with you. you don’t have to act like my little brother but you’ve been my real brother for a while now. you don’t have close friends but you DO have people waiting for you. they won’t forget. (and then he ends up gaming with vdc gang and bantering with ortho around them, slowly coming out of his shell if only temporarily, and i’m so soft over that)

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refurbished ramshackle was nice to see but… not really surprising, lol. looks directly at the guest room feature. twsten rlly likes doing things out of order huh.

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also yuu spent “a few weeks” at pomefiore?? honorary heartslabyul student yuu is out, honorary pomefiore student yuu is in. they even got a uniform!!

jk they can coexist

(i will make them coexist. i love them both sm)

(i wanna see riddle and vil fighting over yuu /hj)

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“I was called before parliament in the Land of Dawning. Bigwigs from STYX, the Department of Education, AND the Department of Magic all bombarded me with questions and glared daggers at me… ‘Why are so many consecutive overblots happening on your watch?! How do you explain this?!’

“That’s what I want to know! What have I done, except run this school as diligently as I could?! Night Raven College has resident counselors and medical mages appointed by the Department of Education as it is!

“Since the assembly saw no major issues with the school’s leadership, the inquiry came to a close… But I certainly didn’t expect one of our students to bring about an off-campus catastrophe even as we convened!”

crowley actually getting in legal trouble (or at least being threatened with legal trouble) actually surprised me a lot??? i’m so used to thinking stuff like this would more or less get covered up for plot convenience or wtv that it’s nice to see crowley get smacked with it. rip headmage

ALSO rip therapist yuu memes bc NRC HAS THERAPISTS (tho theyre not rlly dead bc. no one SEES the therapists. probably. stubborn kids.)

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seeing ortho again = no thoughts left in my head redux, “BABY BOY” edition!! he looks so nice!! i love the lil buttons!! rlly i love all the details, looking like an NRC uniform while still being undeniably ortho

“‘I don’t get it’ is a perfect encapsulation of my current state!”

LOL. he’s not wrong though.

=

…of course crowley took a bribe. i dunno why i’m surprised to hear that.

though in vil’s words, “It’s hardly our place to interject if it’s a win-win for both parties, I suppose.”

crowley’s inquiry about grim’s health makes me side-eye him more strongly the more i think about it. yes i know why (grim attacked yuu, was more strongly affected by the blot, etc) but i’m still suspicious, i wanna know if there’s more to it.

“I’m truly glad that you — ah, that is, ALL of you — made it back to the school safe and sound.”

the way he added “all of you” made it seem to me like they were an afterthought compared to grim…

=

twst rlly put aaaall the fluff at the end huh. not like i’m complaining though!! it’s like a reward for getting through all the angst. idia’s gift is very him (lol) and idia and ortho playing video games with everyone is adorable

“We should probably make Idia play holding the controller backwards or something, though. He’s super good.”

“I see what you’re doing, Ortho. Trying to skate by without any handicaps for yourself, huh? YOU’RE the one who needs extra restrictions, like no items allowed.”

=

play for a crowd! is also up there on my list of favorite twistunes but i can’t play it while sleep deprived or my score goes down the toilet. ask me how i know. half the time normal mode is harder than hard mode.

also i haven’t said it anywhere yet but idia’s battle theme is a banger too. ignihyde osts killed it

=

and rook and vil’s discussion of ortho’s soul!! screams!!

“He — or rather, they — chose to try and boost their brother up from the depths below to the skies above. What do you call such love and affection, if not a soul?”

=

the “dream” sequence was so interesting!! yuu and mickey can’t see anything but each other. grim can’t see mickey either, and vice versa.

but. mickey could see silver. why was silver at ramshackle at night? a reasonable assumption is that silver went to ramshackle to find malleus, couldn’t, and left, but really…

why could mickey see silver at all?

i’ve heard (though i haven’t got a source for this unfortunately) that silver says — somewhere — that he’s seen yuu before, or that they look familiar, or something along those lines. i wanna know if this is connected to that. also, silver’s curse. that too. sleep/dreams vs reality etc.

=

and last but not least, lilia is dropping death flags left and right and malleus is Concerned. to be fair, so am i. what’s going on, dude?

(sidenote: damn it riddle’s hair went back to normal. i was hoping he’d just have white hair now 😭)

(also, eagerly awaiting the “gloomurai is idia and muscle red is lilia” reveal in book 7. yana pls.)

(i… may have gotten spoiled a bit. unintentionally. so now i know that in book 7, [REDACTED].)

[unionizedwizard]

like first of all i had never seen so much pink in one room <- love pink it's not a negative thing. but it was Really Obvious. they've got this whole powdery pink/soft gold/black color scheme going on, every single accessory or furnishing/decorative item is pink, even the walls are a kind of cream color with a mix of gold, black and pink sparkles (?). the hairdresser usually takes her small dog (iirc it's a yorkshire terrier) to work and she (the dog. not the hairdresser) has a pink satin bow in her hair and a special little dog bed (which is, as you probably guessed: pink), but she wasnt there today because it's too cold. (the hairdresser—a lovely woman—also has pinkish maroon hair). a long-time customer showed up to give her flowers for her birthday (SO cute honestly) and she put them in a PINK glass vase (also love the fact she does have spare vases sitting around?). her colleague was also wearing a bright pink sweater

but what was truly fascinating was the conversation. 4 middle aged to elderly women. it went like:

Food. A tentative joke about heavy, cheese-based winter dishes from one of the customers ("my son can't have enough of it, so i made some yesterday"), obviously gauging the general opinion. Immediate backlash: "oh, but that's really bad for cholesterol" "and so rich!". Hasty reassurance from the customer: "oh, i know, i only make it once a year. Anyway, i like vegetables more than meat". Chorus of approval followed by the second customer saying she "had to stop at a motorway service station mcdonalds on her way back home during the holidays" and had to ask her [husband? son?] to eat her fries because she could "barely" eat her burger to begin with. "And would you believe it, the restaurant was packed! people really like it!". Sighs and exclamations ("it's hard to believe it, but people do actually enjoy junk food. I don't know how they do it")

This foundation of understanding having been established ("we are all of us performing womanhood to a satisfactory degree"), the conversation went on to cover a few family matters and eventually the question of rape allegations against famous men. General derision: "well, we can be sure she's in for the money", "i really don't know that these allegations are true. i mean, he does look like a nice, good-natured young man, doesn't he?", "of course, some allegations may be true, but in this case, i really don't see how it can be...". and finally, the hairdresser had the last word: (laughing) "well, i'm going to start saying that brad pitt raped me—either brad pitt or david beckham!"

they went on to talk about US politics, namely the elections: "so terrible that trump won, although it was only to be expected" "yes, remember how hillary clinton lost? they would never have elected a woman. these americans, they're far too traditionalist" "he is crazy, isnt he? nobody knows what he'll do" "all the same, he did say he would care for his own country and not the others', so there may be some wisdom to be found here!"

and then they were done with the 2 customers and other people showed up for their appointments so the general conversation died down

There was something really interesting here, about the values of petit-bourgeois/working to middle class womanhood as a class. It's very blatant that theyre protecting both their status in society and men as a whole but are still vaguely aware of (white, liberal) feminism (on a very shaky ideological ground); both establishing camaraderie and performing scrutiny/surveillance wrt diet culture (making sure everyone is on the same page here, at least verbally). You get to be part of the in-group by signalling your own virtue (liking vegetables better than meat) and disgust (how can people enjoy eating junk food?) around the #1 femininity control test (managing your own caloric intake). Which leads to more abstract and wider societal questions re: rape culture. Etc etc

went to have my hair cut this morning and honestly, hairdresser salons are such a fascinating insight into The_FeminineTM, i'm hooked

[scover-va]

Do you have Reggie and Jeremiah hc If what type of stuff they do together.

Hiiii sorry this took me a bit to get to, I was on a small trip and ive been pretty exhausted all day. And now here I lie awake at 2am bc all my exhaustion went away at like. 9pm or some shit. But I got my Reggie/Jeremiah playlist going so I figured now would be a good time to get to this! Hcs under the cut :-)

- I touched on this in one of my fics (Memories) but before the ‘Lionel Wants This’ incident, they liked slow dancing together! Reggie always had his gramophone playing and they, more often than not, finish cleaning pretty quickly once the original, small inn closed for the night, which always left them with plenty of time. They struggled a bit considering the height difference, but it got especially difficult after that incident. They couldn’t do anything of the sort for a while, between having to hand build the wheelchair, the immense pain Reggie hadn’t adjusted to yet, and just overall shitty moods. Especially Reggie. So, that past time faded away, but if they were to give it another go, they’d find a way to make it work. They’re both incredibly stubborn.

- Following up with another post-incident past time, since most of the books on Reggie’s bookshelf have hidden/blank labels, I’d like to imagine a few of them are storybooks. Reggie would read them out loud to serve as a distraction from life, but if he was tired but unable to fall asleep Jeremiah would read to him until he did fall asleep. Jeremiah had to replace the books often due to how many years passed, but that was MUCH safer than intruding games to collect game characters. So, it was fine. Reggie gets some weird sense of deja vu from it, but can never quite place why.

- Similarly, board games and card games! Jeremiah lets Reggie win most of the time, and Reggie pretends not to know, because he knows Jeremiah’s more than happy to let him win. How does Reggie know? Well Jeremiah’s considerably happier with losing than winning, so, y’know.

- Just simply drinking some root beer together! Reggie may not be able to move as quickly, but Jeremiah doesn’t mind the slow pace, being patient with him. They chat, somehow finding topics despite the lack of change in their lives. They always somehow find something to talk about, and even if they don’t, the silences are never awkward

- Murder planning /hj

- And finally, totally platonic, friendly, heterosexual, non-gay, buddily, straight, non-romantic, cuddling and snuggling very close to one another while they nap. Yep, just a couple of besties, nothing to see here (/s). Jeremiah has a habit of laying on Reggie’s chest or stomach which he adamantly denies for the sake of his own dignity

[mokutone]

OMG ok so sorry for the spam but ur ART!!!,!!,!:&: yamato n kakashi r two of my fav characters and i NEVER see any yamatos fans like this 😭 u draw yama so fuckin well ima cry yo

but like seriously ur art is SO GOOD and so so so cute i LOVE the way u draw all the characters so much! i havent stalked ur whole blog yet (doin that after i submit this Lmfaooo) but i hope to see iruka in ur style sumtime!

idk who u ship in naruto yet lol so im curious do u ship yamakaka or kakaruka?? ima cry if u do cus that means ur beautiful style is gonna draw those beautiful babiessshdksk but obviously no worries if not LOL my bad for this super weird message tho im sleep deprived but also so so happy over ur art. thank u for existing :,-) <3

thank you!!! i’m glad you like my art so much! i’ve drawn a couple irukas then that you might like! (and i plan to draw more, he’s very fun to draw, and i’ve got a strong vision of him sdkghdskgh, the only reason he doesn’t come up much is bc this is mostly a yamato centric blog and he and iruka haven’t interacted much yet) I’m honestly not a very shippy person! Most of the stuff I have on my blog is very platonic and focused on friendship and/or found family dynamics, because that’s the kind of content I like and am interested in creating! That said, i don’t dislike those ships, they can be very well done! I’m just incredibly picky about what kinds of content I consume and how the relationships within it are portrayed. A lot of romantic content tends to drop the platonic bonds, or relegate them to lesser importance, and i don’t care for that much—my ideal content is honestly “casefic” or mission-fic. i want the drama...the intrigue...the bonding, but with professionalism and difficult decisions...also i like plots that feel dangerous and high stakes...

[prisonguards]

@astronomical-bagel

I am. SO terribly sorry about how long this took to reply to, my brain wanted to sit down and write an Essay for u but Ive been. SO BUSY. But seriously Ive been treasuring and hoarding this ask :) its SOOOO so so nice that other people enjoy them as much as I do and Im so happy I could help collect us a little with the tag ^--^ we are all friends now <3 EDIT ALSO TUMBLR ATE THE FUCKING ASK???? I did have screenshot of ur ask thankfully, Im soooo pissed tho idk where it went

So Im gonna go into my history with them a bit cause I kinda got into them backwards ig augshsg. Or at least different from how most ppl in the tag/posting abt them rn are. I was primarily a Traffic and Emp S1 smallidarity guy for the longest time! Funnily enough I was a late adopter of Emp S2 smallidarity (enemies to lovers usually isnt my thing) but the way the community latched onto it and got everyone talking about them really, really got me invested (also getting kin feels helped /shot. Who said that.) I think the other funny thing is that smallidarity is a dynamic where I like the platonic version (almost) equally as much as the romantic—I push for the romantic just because its easiest to collect ppl with a shiptag (although I did intend Smallidarity to be both a platonic and a romantic tag, ftr. Post both! Any! All!) and because I enjoy Complicated dynamics that are easier caught/categorized under a “romantic” lens sometimes even if they arent Necessarily that. But I just love when theyre important to eachother in general.

I actually have Such delusions abt their Traffic dynamic. Im so insane abt it. I think theyre good friends with Joel having slowly building romantic feelings for Jimmy throughout the seasons, which Jimmy is… pretty much aware of and would reciprocate—if Joel would ever ask (he never will). The Last Life dynamic in particular is one that haunts me, because it. Feels like their most amicable Traffic dynamic, at least in my memory, and in no small part of that is Joel pledging to avenge Jimmy (and Mumbo but this is a Smallidarity post isnt it). That small comment profoundly impacts my Traffic Joel characterization and Im planning to incorporate little objects of remembrance for Jimmy into my late game Joel designs. Traffic smallidarity… like many Traffic dynamics that captivate me… its about the missed opportunities, its about the lack of time, its about Tragedy… I just have such bad Last Life brainrot on the mind rn so this has been whats living with me Daily rn.

I also think their 100 Hours is one of the most funny and most OBVIOUSLY flirty dynamics, though I may get into that a bit more with another ask that I got recently, and, well. My Sorry Sir compilation covers a lot of it.

Double Life is what actually converted me but I cannot think of what the Exact moment was. I went back to my messages from when the eps were coming out and.

They immediately got me.

Theres so many good Traffic moments. One day I will make that clip compilation. I swear.

EMPIRES S1……… theyre best friends… I think it would be funny if Joel is independently dating both him and Lizzie and Then they all find out Jimmy and Lizzie are siblings and Joel is like. Oh jesus Christ my type is Even More specific than I thought. Fishkisser boy. Joel making the joke romantic montage of Jimmy before declaring hes gonna be proposing to Lizzie made me. Drop dead. This dynamic is Everything I craved out of them, watching this directly after Double Life and during Emp S2, when theyre most antagonistic, made me fully insane. I LOVE when theyre nice to eachother. So much. Best friends who kiss. Little design headcanon for them is like. Joel is Fully embellished by pearls he gets from Jimmy and Lizzie. I should give Jimmy n Lizzie azaleas to wear in exchange too auughh..

Okay finally circling back to Where We Are Now. Emp S2. These fuckers.

So Im delusional and like it best when theyre Soft right? So even though S2 lends itself So well to toxicity (and dont get me wrong. Sometimes I Gotta indulge) I rlly like making it cutesy as fuck. Joels obsession and complete infatuation and cute aggression is everything. Hes so infatuated with this guy he doesnt know what to do with himself and just is Relentless. schoolyard “hes bullying you because he likes you” type beats. Hes my moron hes my annoying king. I cannot remember if Ive talked abt my design headcanons fully but Im big on the Jimmy Was Human but Joels god powers are Changing That. I think its subconscious, hes not doing it maliciously, reality just bends to his will too much.

Also. Found my decision moments… these are from July 3rd.

I think. Overall the most enthralling thing about them is the care that underlies everything. That despite the endless teasing and bullying, Joel really genuinely care about Jimmy in a way he struggles to express sometimes. I think its really special and charming and compelling. I just have illnesses about them

[surpriserose]

Chris can u fancast how Hollywood would cast RGU

Jesus christ is this payback for boyfriends posting im sorry ill never do it again

God okay rgu has a pretty big cast and im gonna be ignoring some characters but only like people from the black rose arc sorry mikage and ljke all the minor characters </3 but still this is gonna be long and terrible and ouughhhh >:(

Okay first things first this is Hollywood this shit takes place in LA now and everyones been whitewashed to hell and back since im going the ghost in the shell slash death note light *TURNER* route im so sorry

Utena tenjou, now utena Turner (no relation to light) is gonna be fucking haliee steinfeld because oughhhh it causes me the most amount of pain and i honestly feel like you couldnt pay her to kiss another woman

Anthy himemiya, now called annie hemingway to not confuse american audiences, is played by priyanka Chopra because they remember anthy is indian but not that shes you know dark skinned

Touga kiryuu, now called tony kerrigan, has to be god whats that dude from to all the boys ive loved before? Noah centineo who is painfully miscast because no one understands touga who is now just genuinely utenas love interest probably

Nanami Kiryuu, now fuckinggggg ouuygghh nancy kerrigan or something, is played by jojo siwa who honestly could probably pull it off i believe in her but not with the script and director who probably make nanami unrecognizable. Because its jojo siwa she gets some new original character to have a blink and you miss it gay kiss with

Saionji kyouichi, now god fucking sean cooper or some shit, is now entirely comic relief so anthy and utena can have #girlpower moments that dont work AT ALL so hes probably like fuckign idk one of the jonas brothers the one who was in jumanji he was pretty good actually

Miki kaoru, now mickey kelly i guess, idk hes like tom holland in a bad wig being his best uwu soft boi

Juri Arisugawa, now julie armstrong, is fucking ahhhhh im running out of hip young actors im gonna have to start looking up the euphoria cast list juris uhhh dove Cameron i think that fits in that it doesnt. Juris also straight shiori doesnt exist her new love interest is ruka/ryan played by uhhhh cole sprouse lets dip into riverdale

Hmmm i think thats everyone except akio? Im gonna be vague on akio since you dont know who he is but

Akio is now aaron Hemingway annies brother and hes played but rahul kohli who is the dude whos way too good for this project and honestly i think he could do it but again akio is unrecognizable hes just anthys supportive but hilarously overbearing older brother

Other things that cause me pain aside from casting:

Utena isnt butch anymore she dresses like a Hollywood tomboy and probably gets a feminine makeover at some point and sticks with it

No one is lgbt except nanami and even then plus they probably make a few jokes about anthy and utena looking like a couple and its really homophobic

Idk the rose bride is now the equivalent of a prom queen and everyones competing to get anthy as their date or something but then anthy and utena start competing to be the rose bride

And because its unrecognizable as rgu utena and anthy both become rose brides and its the climax of the movie where theyre like ...women...dont have..to fight each other....we're all rose brides probably with some mean girls references

It closes on utena and touga kissing and probably idk anthy and saionji kissing and the rest of the couples

Olivia rodrigo makes a cameo as like the prom singer or something and does an english pop cover of rinbu revolution that is also unrecognizable

People online get mad if you ship this version of anthy and utena because theyre straight

[ikusayu-no-hana]

kiden!! act ii

LETS GO THIS IS MY MOST FAVOURITE SCENE IN THE HISTORY OF TKRB EVER

genuinely fully in love with the idea of kasen narrating events like theyre a story. because thats such a rare glimpse of his vulnerability. and.......this is the first time we see him open up about his past and describe what really made him who he is, apart from the sanjuurokkasen incident.

he’s so full of love isn’t he? burdenless, still innocent, pure happiness. what we’re being shown is his time as a tsukumogami, several decades before tadaoki baptized kasen in blood. but as of now, where gracia is singing her child to sleep, kasen’s heart is, dare i say, the purest it’s ever been, because the tragedy comes in way later. it almost hurts to see what kasen used to be in the past.

(ofc the part of him being a tsukumogami at this point is just speculation and how i choose to interpret it)

oh yougknow i cried. i cried so hard when the camera switched to him mouthing the lullaby and tapping his finger on his sword to the rhythm. how many times had he heard that song before? he’s got it completely memorized . its about the tenderness its about the fondness its about the soft feelings . he’s had all these stories stored away in him with no one to tell them to and its so sad. its so so sad.

the way kasen adds his own little interjections in their conversations even though they cant hear him? love

nodding his head as his parents (thats what they are, arent they?) happily discuss their child’s future. this is the happiest scene in the entirety of kiden.

whenever kasen switches to narrating again he’s the present kasen, more somber, pained. it gives me whiplash.

i’ll mention it here for the sake of perspective: in the first scene, tama and tadaoki were 17 years old, and that baby was the future hosokawa tadataka. the honnouji incident would happen in 1582, when they were both just 19 years old (holy shit thats nearly how old im gonna be.............anyway). and kasen, at that point, was ofc a relatively young tsukumogami, having been forged in 1505.

he looks at his hand like he’s surprised it moved on its own.........

i find it so infinitely profound that it’s kasen himself who gives gracia that name. ‘the grace/blessing of god’

tadaoki’s terrible temper and jealousy were the real cracks in their relationship werent they.

FUCK FUCK FUCK EVERYTIME KASEN TURNS AWAY FROM THE VIOLENCE I CANT HELP DOING THE SAME. its such a human thing to turn away from something so morally terrible and kasen cant bear watching it. if he turned away from just this one murder, imagine how he mustve felt when tadaoki used him to end 36 innocent lives at once. its one thing to kill that many people in battle, because obviously the purpose of a sword is to be a weapon of war, but quite another to be used to end innocent lives as a means to set a mere example. kasen’s first kills ever broke the samurai code. no wonder he says the others dont know what kind of face to make around him.

there it is. she calls tadaoki a demon. an oni.

when you grow up in distrustful, toxic environment like that you learn to shut yourself up because you dont feel safe in it anymore and internalize it all as a method of coping, and thats exactly what happened to kasen. as the scenes go on and on he talks to them less (+ the fact that one by one, most of the hosokawa swords left the family, and kasen was left mostly alone for the next centuries, but i digress) the sanjuurokkasen incident just solidified that permanently . and as we’ve seen in the past sutes, that + tadaoki’s temperament affects the way he interacts with others, most notably ookurikara. and him absolutely coddling sayo, keeping him to himself, not letting him mingle with the Date swords.

The cherry on top of this scene is how kasen comes forward, saying the same lines from giden, ‘a bloodstained kimono isn’t elegant…not elegant at all’ while looking at his right sleeve, paralleling gracia’s own bloodstained right sleeve. He’s horrified, but at the same time, looks at it with resignation. The pure, untainted kasen of the past is………..no more. Love is pain, is the lesson tadaoki carved into him.

the sword tadaoki used for stabbing the gardener wasnt kasen. its obvious that kasen identifies himself with gracia, as a horrified witness, a victim even. him looking at his sleeve and being dyed red as well is proof of that.

on the other hand, if we discount the tsukumogami theory, it becomes like this: kasen is reliving the story inside him, right from the beginning of their marriage, and somewhere deep, deep inside, he’s still capable of being as kind and tender as we saw. full of love and trust. he’s just built so many walls around himself that it doesnt come out as open display after all.

im not sure which interpretation hurts more.

The next scene is like a bandaid over a gunshot wound lol

>Nikkari and kotegiri look at each other like ‘ah, there he is, let's do our thing’

I really like how the two wakizashi (sasuga wakizashi, always there to support you <3) have their own unique ways of comforting kasen. nikkari offers to have a bath together, an indirect way of offering concern, while kotegiri straight out asks him what happened. Im . you can see the concern they have for him, to approach him like that. im so glad kasen has friends that notice and look after him (<- sounding like a parent)

I know kasen says theyre not his memories but rather tadaoki’s story inside of him, but, in essence….arent they the same? Everything kasen narrated felt like his own experiences, the story he lived through, and the will he inherited.

>nikkari kneeling next to a lantern is such subtle nod to his story

awwwww its so cute how nikkari and kasen explain the battle tactics to kotegiri, he feels like their little brother wwww i love these three

kasen is right to be concerned about chougi taking kokin out for a ‘stroll’

I love how nikkari is honest without being overbearing thats literally  what kasen needs and i will scream about it from the rooftops. I really really like him so much and I hope hes involved in future plays as well  Please god  !

oh he’s so perceptive. literally leaves kasen, the poet, speechless. nikkari is amazing.

Kotegiri is so ????????? considerate?????????????????? he didnt want kasen to meet tadaoki in that state bc he thought he’d be disillusioned??!?!!?! im. thats so fucking sweet of kotegiri. to think of sparing kasen more pain. urhgrhghdghdfjnjdknfjdn going to cry wait. (kasen gives him a little smile at this. ueeeeueeueueeeee)

'utsukushisa wa, tokaku hito wo kuruwaseru' is such an abstract, raw, line. what the fuck kasen. it reminds me of this one paradigm i came across: beauty is terror. and what could be more terrifying and beautiful, to souls like the greeks or our own, than to lose control completely? its important to note kasen says beauty (美しさ), and not love.

kasen's implicitly wondering if tadaoki's madness came from his perfect, married bliss. you could actually write an entire thesis paper on this scene alone.

btw just a thought but i think these screencaps should be framed and hung up at the Louvr–*gunshots* im totally biased when i say he's the most beautiful character in touken ranbu. in all its adaptations. forever and ever. ok just had to get that out lets continue.

im counting this little uta-gumi-interaction as the canon altered one after his kiwame. our kasen knows kotegiri well enough, and accepts the other forms of ‘uta’ that the other honmaru’s kasen couldnt. bless sute for drawing from original game content and somehow coming up w an even better interaction. viva la moonwalk !!!!!!!!!!!!!

(yay lets go on to the next scene while im still reeling about the hosokawa family!)

chougi hiding the fact that he's an inspector is an intentional plot point isnt it. i think he's going to be a central character in piecing together all the hints and clues from all the altered timelines to solve the Great Mikazuki Mystery. thats why he asked for the other honmaru's report from kasen at the end of kahakugeki.

oh my god that means no one recognized even his voice? i mean he was disguised and had a mask and everything in jurakutei's investigation so understandably they wouldnt know what he looked like, but his voice, surely???? i think manba will come back and surely surprise us with the fact that he knows. im counting on that.

kokin is SO perplexed and his face screams ??????? but he's being so nice about it. to be fair it WAS chougi that derailed their conversation anyway so kokin's justified .

man. kokin-sama is so beautiful. tsukaryo is so beautiful.

i like this chougi way more. the guy from the other honmaru in kahakugeki was more...stoic and brutal, suggesting theyd kill jizou if it came to that. but our chougi (<3) doesnt comment further on kokin's wish, just apologizes for suspecting him.

>kokin's senses r apparently sharper than chougi's bc he picked up on kikkou and shishiou eavesdropping on them

I LAUGHED THEYRE SO ADORABLEEEEE

here! chougi's interest is peaked as soon as shishiou mentions the troublesome bunkyu tosa-han inv. it must be this that sets chougi's sirens off, along w kuroda kanbei.

yeah, theyre not humans but stories.....fictionalised, romanticized accounts from unreliable memories, all mixed up and messy.

seifu.......

just occurred to me that once they got back to their inn (?) they mustve found kasen nikkari kote relaxing in the bath jdsnjsdnvkjnjkzsn. chougi, to kokin kikkou shishiou: saa, guzuguzu suru na! *finds the wakizashi and their captain in the ofuro after a traumatic event*

why make promises no one can ever hope to keep......😭😭😭😭

the way this timeline operates is completely different from the one in tosa worked. its actually terrifying how connected it is to gracia's will. like its completely living. (imagine if the city in this one started moving randomly tho. they wouldve never gotten out the dark passage). while ryouma is the last person to transform into his.....alternate form, gracia is the first, and only when she has transformed do all the other daimyo also transform

yea i lost count of how many times theyve said chichi naru deus rip. (would their god really wish for such a thing to happen to the natural world though? such an ...... unworldly thing. just saying . if i was a christian i wouldve immediately known the history revisionists were the devil's minions. but then again i cant imagine how terrible it mutsve been for them as a religious minority to be persecuted and hiding their entire lives in fear of death. they wanted to live. its different from the bunkyu-tosa humans where they wished for the future of the country as a whole. here, the christians make their own country for their own benefit.)

i love how everyone’s instantaneous reaction to being surrounded by enemies is to gather around kasen in position.

i remember being tired out in the second half of kahakugeki bc there were a lot of fights but they werent fights with real actors. kiden fortunately doesnt bore me because all the swordfights are so much cooler, and with real enemies too :)

i was just thinking 'wouldnt it be too crowded to fight so many people in such a narrow tunnel?' and then kikkou and nikkari literally save the day by chipping in!

i love the fact that sute emphasizes the 'aoe' instead of nikkari. i think kotegiri is the only one who calls him 'nikkari-san', everyone else calls him by his smith name, creating this sense of formal distance.

'bokutachi wa kigai sou da na' in many ways, aoe and kikkou are the same; werent they both shortened? aren't they both a little strange?

KURAGIRI TSUURO MY BELOVED

the way kokin says he found something is so funny like. they mustve been groping around in the dark for some kind of clue as to where theyre going and kokin just finds something that very coincidentally happens to be just what they need and kote and shishiou r like OHHHHH. and then they start dancing. i was surprised but i loved it. esp the lighting.......the overhead dark blue complementing their lanterns’ orange glow was a palette artists (me) would go crazy over . kasen looks beautiful btw.

🤡🤡🤡 besties how could you get lost you were LITERALLY DANCING TOGETHER A SECOND EARLIER.

noooo jizou dont run awayysydyfhdsajsf youre hurting kokinnnn

HOW is jizou stronger than kokin despite being there for the same amount of time. but its true that kokins bad at fighting (said so himself) and has been in lesser fights than jizou has been in. so.

what a pair they make. a traitor’s daughter and a traitor touken danshi.

i like this interpretation of the game’s lantern mechanics.

badass gracia badass gracia BADASS GRACIA BADASS GRACIA. tousute women are such strong characters but they come at a heavy mental cost tho

in kahakugeki jizou literally screamed kokin’s name like he hated him, but in kiden our jizou sounds apologetic, and seconds later he does apologize.....;-;

actually they do it twice dont they. at first its ‘jizou yukihira!’ ‘kokindenjunotachi!’ but when theyre leaving its ‘jizou...’ ‘kokin...’ softer

if kasen said 無粋 な 真似は やめて もら お う か to my face i’d kill myself

they still have their lanterns in hand and its insane to think about how all this is happening under a castle in a narrow dark passage where they can possibly hear each other’s fights and yells and basically th entirety of the characters r fighting in the kuragari tsuuro. like all 19 of them + the TRA. it mustve been chaotic

ARIMA HARUNOBU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

his existential crisis strikes me the most....in reality he was ordered by hideyoshi to commit seppuku BUT since suicide is a sin in christianity, he requested to be executed. his wife reportedly kissed his severed head after his execution.

but this harunobu doesnt know how he died because hes a mix of reality and rumours and. its painful not to know who you are

pls sute can we have kotegiri dancing with kikkou shishiou and nikkari some time in the future pleaseeeeeee. you already mentioned in muden that they do but i also wanna see it

second time kasen says ‘katsute no aruji ga aishita’

chougi chougi CHOUGI BELOVED

i had to wipe a tear bc chougi and kasen fighting together so in sync was too beautiful. you dont get that type of synchronicity at random. they mustve practiced a lot at the honmaru.

a moment to reflect on how killing even these fake humans is painful

and of fuckng course nikkari would be concerned about where their souls would go ...... if they would even be counted as souls

‘do not pity the enemy you cut’            ........

FUCK kote had a nosebleed accident

the absolute sarcasm in chougi’s voice when he asks kokin if this is the Time to be reciting poetry. bestie let him be, poetry is his coping mechanism.

‘have you forgotten the poem?’ implying kasen has recited it to him in the past ok ok ok

very interesting how kasen addresses everyone else by either ‘kimi’ or ‘kiden’ but kokin by ‘anata’ but in his kiwame it remains ‘kimi’. this may mean nothing at all. or it may mean everything.

kasen......the kindness kasen knows is different. its brutal. it has an undercurrent of violence to it. he’s actually ready to cut down jizou for this mission, even says so in a later scene, telling him to defend gracia with his life. with kasen it’s always extremes.

yeah, and kokin does struggle with too much kindness

LETS GO LETS GO KASEN KANESADA NO UTA O

she calls kasen ‘ano hito’.......like he’s a person. actually he is, since he carries tadaoki’s heart, which ties in to gracia calling him a demonic husband. a demonic person’s sword will also be a demon. or the devil himself.

oh boy shinken hissatsu sequences!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im so happy they had ALL of them battered bc in iden only tosa-gumi were hissatsu’d and it was kind of disappointing (<- she wanted to see izuminokami’s awakening)

YESSSSSSSSSSSS kikkous inner.........restraints!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sute did that. sute REALLY DID that

KOTEGIRI . he’s so fierce

you can really hear the italian/spanish (sorry idk what that instrument is but its def european!) influences. manzo did say they put a lot of effort into adding christian influences into the soundtrack . and by god did they succeed.

BUT THE BIGGEST SURPRISE WAS NUE WHAT THE FUCK NUE I KNEW YOU WERE ALIVE BUT SUTE MADE YOU EVEN MORE ALIVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I LOVE IT HES BITING THEM shishiou has abs KILL KILL KILL BITE KICK ASS YEAHHHHH THEYRE SO COOL

im just going to say it: nikkari is sexy as fuck. just the right amount of exposed skin. cursed red eye free from hair curtain. unhinged laugh. sensual action sequences. disheveled hair moving like water. my image of pure soft mashiro is shattered by those abs. and perfect bgm btw it feels like im ascending

chougi walks onto the battlefield like god sent him. like he’s the hecking reincarnation of death. which he is. (umechan’s growling is spot on.)

oh this silence after chougi leaves.  i know whats going to happen but it still makes my hair stand on end. here we go

FUCK

FUCK FUCK FUCK

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

FUCKING HELL

that opera wants me dead.

kasen emerging like he’s a statue made from marble, looking like that??? all ruffled up???? the shadow of anger on his face? with THOSE muscles? i think its my bias speaking. but that exposed shoulder is the single most sexual thing ive ever seen. i mean that in the most respectful way possible. and wadakuma has literally bulked up for this so his hissatsu in hiden pales in comparison to this.............

and his voice comes out like its being dragged out from him. like he can barely get the words out due to anger. he’s super fucking mad

THIS. this is the most spirited fight he’s ever had. its so obvious he’s on a completely different level from his teammates (he’s lv99 isnt he) with the way he’s slicing and controlling an entire crowd . he’s grown so strong....................... 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

i forgot to breathe

how does kasen still look like the most beautiful being in the universe despite being injured.

just like gracia, kasen feels the pull of fate trying to bring them to each other. there is literally no other explanation. their stories are just that strongly connected to each other.

he’s being honest for a second and admitting he had doubts. also the third time he says ‘katsute no aruji ga aishita’ like its drilled into him.

taken aback by being called an oni......maybe he thought gracia hated him, was looking at him with the same hatred she felt for tadaoki

kokin isnt supposed to cry please nooooooooooooooo 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 we all wish honnouji hadnt happened but seeing kokin finally lose his composureeeeeeeeee

otomo sourin is..........undeniably one of the most sincerest christians in this. he wanted to genuinely let all the christians born there live their lives, but in the end, this place he thought would be better became engulfed in the same ‘blood and war’ he wanted to escape from. its so heartening to see the touken danshi respond to him with that same sincerity. ‘we’ll certainly carve it into our chest’

here lies jesus betrayed by most of his disciples. the last supper lived up to its name

‘the presence i feel from you is one im very familiar with.’ is a strong (and the first) confirmation of the fact that chougi and manba are directly Connected to each other. fused and attuned to each other. i mean chougi hadnt even met manba for very long, with the latter leaving for his kiwame journey on the same day that chougi arrived. because no one other than chougi himself seems to feel that kuroda kanbei is.......different from the others. in any case, we can safely conclude that a piece of manba is lodged in chougi, just like a piece of chougi is lodged in manba. theyre the same but different, destined to have this indivisable connection.

in the same vein, i wonder if those from the same smith schools also feel the presence of their fellow crafted swords? perhaps those who’ve spent a long time together? or replicas and originals? would kasen be able to uniquely perceive izumi? would horikawa and yamabushi too, like chougi, be able to discern manba’s presence from a sea of swords? its an interesting idea with countless possibilities, so i’ll wager yes.

(chougi senses manba, kasen senses gracia, their connections run parallel)

kokin’s first human kill is ukon. its a shame the camera didnt switch to a closeup of kokin bc right after he stabs him, kokin strokes his sword and looks at his hand....

im not completely sure about this, but kasen is fearful, or at least very wary, of ukon. in kahakugeki when ukon yelled at him in his altered form, kasen flinched terribly. and now, when ukon is requesting kasen for something, kasen is suddenly on his guard, eyes widening. honestly idk why? maybe he thought he’d transform into something else? scared of what ukon might say??

about the bell tolling after ukon dies: its a death knell. ‘the ringing of a church bell immediately after a death to announce it.’ also symbolizes the end of something, or something that will end soon. in this context, the last of the christians has fallen. harunobu, sumitada, yukinaga, sourin, ukon, and then the tensho embassy. kuroda kanbei has essentially deserted them, and now only gracia remains. (when i typed this out i realized how bleak that sounds)

their roles were brief but.......the tensho boys did leave their mark behind. and their last words were haunting. and otomo sourin’s last few words as well.......

(i think nikkari may be subtly suggesting they all were spirits?)

‘surely someone somewhere within this sky is watching over you. kotegiriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii im going to shake you so hard

FUCK THEY SHOW KIKKOU NIKKARI SHISHIOU KOTE LOOKING ABSOLUTELY REMORSEFUL AND STUNNED WTFFFFFFFF

i mean i know thats manba, in some fucked up way, but i cant help not feeling attached to him (it?). and he is definitely acting on his own will, even fighting against the tra whenever it suits his own purposes, but its simply not our manba. theres this theory that that’s what manba is reduced to after his kiwame training goes wrong or something but i dont buy that. our manba is strong enough. he wouldnt be reduced to a time-hopping masterless sword like that.

this time chougi wins. you know how stupendous that is? just in his last appearance on stage, chougi had his ass handed to him in front of everyone by manba. now he fucking breaks manba’s fake with his own two hands. fucked up but also amazing narrative.

and he’s SO hell bent on protecting manba’s legacy. He’s so mad on manba’s behalf. AND HE DOESNT CALL OUR MANBA NISEMONOKUN HE CALLS HIM YAMANBAGIRI KUNIHIROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DELICIOUS DELICIOUS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

‘yamanbagiri kunihiro. until you come home, i’ll protect this honmaru’ FUCKED ME UPPPPPPPPP he’s one of them now he’s one of them he has companions and he’s become less prickly than he used to be he’s HE’S BECOME A SUTE SWORD!!!!!!!!! that loss and uguisumaru’s lecture mustve made him introspect what his ideals and attitude entailed for the first time . that scene at the end of jiden where he’s standing at the top looking at everyone go about their daily chores? that was the start of his turning point. he realized he still had so much to learn about this honmaru before signing it off as merely pitiful. they tamed him <3

it all ties back to fucking oda nobunaga at the end im going to tear my hair out

pain pain all i know is pain . all kasen and jizou and kokin know is pain

be ready to protect her with your life because kasen knew a man who couldnt and regretted it till his dying day . he’s literally threatening to kill jizou i havent seen a sword wanting to destroy another ever since hiden. the hosokawa swords r fucked up

organs in the bgm are taken directly from the game ost

when gracia makes the slightest movement kasen and kokin r immediately on their guards . cryyyyyyyyyyying

um UM???? KAI-CHAN’S LINE DELIVERY????????????????????

‘anata wa inferno ni itte naranai. jizou bosatsu no michibiku ni shitegainasai. mada modoreru.’ english cant do these words justice. she’s choosing to give jizou up bc not only are they not supposed to be together, and she wants jizou to follow his own path rather than force himself to follow hers, which would be an irreedemable sin in both their faiths.

there we go. she cut their connection.

THE WAY kasen puts himself between jizou and graciadknsdkjnesjknfnsfkjnfkjneakfnueihnivasndkvwniugniufvnsfdjkanvuancuiasnkjcdsnvjkarnuesnkfjfnskdjvniuafnjesniuwenifunewanfiuwnfiu keysmashing isnt enough i need to jump on my keyboard

he tells kokin to take care of jizou not because kokin needed to be told or ordered to do so, but rather because kasen needs confirmation they’ll be safe and okay till he comes back. bc despite threatening jizou, he cares. and this line isnt even in the game event btw.

i hate and love this part. hate it bc it makes me cry.

(puts on my tinfoil hat) ave maria as a choice is actually so interesting because:

loved one's death I wonder who that could be djsdjdbcnsgshdodhdjfjdbdjdbfbd 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 KASEN’S BELOVED GRACIA OF FUCKING COURSE

note: ‘full of grace’ in latin is literally gratia plena (as in gracia, get it?)

of course, this bgm has drawn inspiration from the last boss bgm in the game’s keichou kumamoto event itself, so the ave maria bit comes in from there, but sute (full of absolutely insane people) have extended ave maria’s duration so that it perfectly lasts for the entirety of kasen’s and gracia’s fight.

oh btw this is the actual wall painting inside kumamoto castle’s honmaru goten! 

they changed the original painting to that of a couple which, 99.9%, is supposed to be gracia and tadaoki ;-; stabbed me in the heartdfghjk

(side note: the game has this change as well, but only on the first time you defeat the last boss. all subequent times you defeat the boss, the wall retains its original form, implying history has been corrected)

and thats not all the significance this painting has!!!!!!!!!!! according to the official kumamoto castle website, the original painting depicts wang zhaojun, one of the famous ‘four beauties’ of china. you can read a more comprehensive version of her story here, but the most important thing is that she, too, despite being hailed as virtuous and intelligent, was denied her rights to return home because of men in power, and died by suicide. like gracia, she also was a symbolic political figure (whereas wang zhaojun is said to represent the ties between the han dynasty and the mongolians, gracia’s death served to drive tadaoki to ieyasu’s side and arguably aided in winning sekigahara). what kind of coincidence is that.

theres a moment where he simply gazes at her. i cant emphasize how much him just looking at her means so much.

its like kasens body moves on its own but his mind is still clouded and the reality and hasnt caught up with the reality of what he is about to do.

for those two seconds she was saying nikukute nikukute nikukute, kasen must’ve thought she was talking about him, but then she adds that very soft ‘itoshii’ and his eyes cant go wide enough, like he’s woken for the first time, realizing the severity of the kill. ill never forget that face.

and tama sinks to her knees, fallen, just like she did when begging tadaoki to kill her.....time is a flat circle

my eyes popped out when tadaoki appeared like he was some kind of angel sent by the heavens. or some kind of ghost.

 theres nothing but love theres nothing but pure love in his eyes as he looks at gracia.

i once read somewhere that home is the first place you learn to run from. kasen’s been trying to outrun a lot of his past but this scene is like coming back home after a long time out in the rain. his parents finally notice him and are proud of him, for being as he is, painful stories and all. i cant stop looking and choking up at his bewildered face when tadaoki says those words. genuinely. this was his divine salvation, the first time we ever see him cry.

unlike cain and abel, kokin is his brother’s keeper. he nearly lost him once and he’s not letting him go ever again.

‘jizou yukihira [...] i will pray for your flower to bloom....’ says gracia as she disappears..............a play on the title. you knwo what that means? it means gracia has transferred the title of flower over to jizou. (kasen later also reaffirms this, saying ‘it is not the time for you to scatter yet’ to jizou when he asks kasen to kill him. wait now that i typed it out thats so dark)

isnt it quite ironic that he chases them after they’ve disappeared and gone? there’s a limit to how much a heart can restrict itself.

(the arm which kahakugeki kasen and kiden kasen wipe tama’s blood on r different. in kiden, he does it to his right forearm, which takes me back to the time he was looking at his own sleeve after tadaoki bloodied tama’s sleeve. that right forearm is like a sort of landmark for emotional pain. red blood on a blue kimono makes purple.....)

the first time he ever offers a smile to kokin and i break down. i

to some swords their master’s feelings come easily enough, and everyone else recognizes them (like mutsu in iden) but kasen and jizou, because they were part of a cosmically complex story about something that to most swords is indecipherable (love) they dont know how to understand or know sansai-sama and tama-sama’s heart.

‘what are you thinking of right now? what am i thinking of right now?’

there’s so much of kasen in this dialogue. and. i dont have any words left. like kasen said it isnt something to be described by such everyday, ordinary words. but what remains is that even if he thinks he’s far away from being elegant, he hasn’t lost his poetic spirit in all this violence. that integrity, he has kept.

compared to kahakugeki, his voice is less brash and abrasive when telling jizou to stand. these small differences actually make a whole world of difference.

the absolute look of heartbreak jizou gives him

and its almost imperceptible, but kasen nods at him. and im not 100% sure but he offers him a small smile as well.

there it is. the amatsukaze. the heavenly wind that with it hopefully took away with it the souls of those that died. (since the wind is representative of kokin it feels like he’s wrapping up the events of this investigation, bringing it all to an end.) (i read a repo by someone that wondered if what kasen glimpsed at those last moments was actually paraiso, heaven, and thats why he was so shocked. its left up to our interpretation)

these lines of dialogue feel like kasen wrote them down in his own diary. in kahakugeki this was the exact dialogue given to the kodanshi. i wonder if kasen simply handed the script he made to him so he could tell a story from it.

‘the year after gracia’s death, the christianity ban wasn’t lifted, but tadaoki established a church. at the mass, it was said he lamented gracia. even now, tadaoki’s and gracia’s two graves, lie side by side in the hosokawa clan’s cemetary.’

kokin’s incoming call, again, is: 来ぬ人を　待つ夕暮れの秋風は　いかに吹けばかわびしかるらむ [What is the nature / of the autumn wind’s blowing / that it brings such grief / when in the dusk I await / someone who fails to appear? (from the tkrb wiki)

summarises all the longing and pain wholly.

also, its coincidental he mentioned  秋 here because the kikyou flower, symbol of the akechi clan, is one of japan’s ‘seven flowers of autumn’. despite all the association kiden and kasen have with spring (new creation, blossoming ideas etc) the seasonal and character developmental journey has left us at autumn, with kasen coming back to us with a kikyou replacing his peony.

i suppose some would call it sute wanting to quickly end kasen’s character arc, but him departing for his kiwame journey goes to show how frantic and eager he was to really achieve his full potential. and you know what? fucking good for him. he deserves it. i was fully happy with it. more than happy in fact. ecstatic.

but also, its funny how he left right before the incoming call came in again. i mean surely he didnt know when exactly it’d come right? in the game, kokin literally says ‘to wait or to keep one waiting, im not very good at that’ and kasen, absolute mad lad, does exactly that omg.

apparently, only kikkou and nikkari knew of kasen leaving.

nikkari’s smileeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. he’s happy for kasen.!!!!!!!!!!!

kasens smile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! his pure, genuinely delightfully rare smile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! while he’s off !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so happy i was alive to witness it

church choir in the bgm!

them. kidengumi. dear dear dear kidengumi. rode out this hard mission together. high fiving each other. i dont even have words

KASEN MAKES THE SAME POSE AS THE TIME HE EMERGED IN HIS SHINKEN HISSATSUUUUU

as far as i’m concerned, this is what divinity looks like in mortal form . i could wax poetic about the composition of this scene, his costume, which solidified completely my love for his kiwame, the little butterfly accessories, wadakuma’s constant dimple..... (i say this very calmly for a person who went into hysterics for the rest of the day after seeing it live. all that emotion nearly made me throw up. im so so so so so, so proud of him.) i don’t think i’ll ever stop getting goosebumps from his shinken hissatsu and kiwame. even though i’d been spoiled since the start of april i cant believe that it really happened. kuma’s triumphant smile right as he struck all the tra at once.....i wonder how it mustve felt like. being so powerful, the centre of this story, and that being the last performance too.....man hold on i need to cry

The first words he says to us, after returning, are  literally tadaoki's death poem (despite his nonchalance about  sansai-sama's death in his kiwame letters, it must've hung heavy on  him):  皆共が忠義 戦場が恋しきぞ いづれも稀な者どもぞ (sorry idk how to translate this without  it sounding incomplete but the gist of it is that he misses the battlefield,  and all the rare people that left him) . and kasen adds in his own  little line as well: やがて 僕たちもそうな るのだろうか？でもその時までは. will we eventually become thus as well? but, until then...

(kasen’s understood and seen mortality right in its closest proximity. he’s contemplating the possibility of them one day becoming nothing.....having to leave the battlefield for good. which ties into something ive been wondering as well: when they finally defeat the tra, save mikazuki etc, when there wont be any enemy left, what would their purpose be? kasen’s answer is simply, we won’t know until we reach that point. until then, they will keep fighting. that is all.)

kasen left reciting gracias death poem and came back to us with tadaoki's death poem on his tongue.

its like he’s casting off who he used to be and, like a butterfly, has reinvented himself by letting his old self go. I'm not a christian, and haven't witnessed any christian rituals, so I say this with secondhand knowledge only: kasen's kiwame reveal felt  like a Baptism. an interesting commentary on one of the bible passages comes to mind: "O merciful God, grant that the old Adam in this child may be so buried, that the new man may be raised up in him." what is metamorphosis if not a temporary death? he buried the old tadaoki in him. i mean buried as in come to terms with. he’s no longer fighting and struggling against him. acceptance, like kasen mentions seeking in his kiwame letters, becomes him.

i can’t get over how in the curtain call bows, wadakuma cant stop looking and smiling at the audience. you cen literally feel his happiness radiating everywhere. no more crying like in kahakugeki’s daisenshuuraku, they made it out the dark tunnel. just. god. im so full of emotions whenevr kiden is brought up. kuma loves kasen so much.

im glad suemitsu-san spent so much effort on making kiden as faithful and true and sensitive to everyone’s characters. im so so glad that we got two keichou kumamoto adaptations. im terribly happy that they could tell us the story of our sute honmaru’s investigation, without compromising a single thing. i’ll carry this happiness within me for a long, long time, even if i wasn’t there in person. if anyone has managed to get done reading both of my silly posts and made it till here, i hope you’ve felt the same gratitude and bewilderment and all the various mixture of emotions kiden threw at us. kasen is my favourite character, and i hope this beautiful tale has left a mark on everyone who saw it, just like kuma said.

(thoughts on the ed here)

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

I need to share soft sign language buddies ninogami headcanon because they’re taking over my brain always:

(This got so long, so youre welcome if youre also starved for ninogami content)

Nino’s mom is Deaf , so he grew up signing as much as speaking. When he was younger he always signed as he talked.

It turned out he’s also Hard of Hearing, so sign language is way easier for him to understand most of the time.

However, though he’s great at making friends, he’s very awkward when it comes to talking about himself. So never comes up in conversation.

It’s not a self-deprication issue. It’s just a “thinking of things to say is hard and I’d rather have someone else do the talking” thing. He’d rather talk about anyone except himself.

Additionally! He’s great at helping other people, but he’s terrible at asking for help. He does not EVER want to be like “hey i cant understand what you’re saying, my ears dont work great,” its his worst nightmare

And it doesnt help that there have been a few cases of people being rude about it when he doesnt hear them after they repeat themselves. And possibly worse, there have been even more cases of people giving over-the-top apologies instead of just,, telling him what they said. So it’s not worth the trouble in his mind

with his few close friends who still dont know, it feels like its too late and it’d be awkward to bring it up, so he just… doesnt. He’s procrastinating on telling them he cant hear them

He stopped signing as much as he talked in middle school because strangers would always be like “woah thats so cool, how do you know sign language” and he’d just panic because he was an awkward tween, and he didnt know if he was comfortable telling them he was HoH, but ALSO just saying his mom was Deaf and not mentioning himself felt like directly lying by hiding information, so he just took the “lazy” way out and signed less in public.

Sometimes fighting the anxiety was not worth it so he just let it win in that case.

Nino is so nice and energetic and loves people, but he is way more introverted and anxious than his friends think.

But when they start to get closer, Kagami who is ever-observant, notices him signing a little bit, (not ever to her, not ever on purpose, but he’d sometimes sign a word he needed to remember while speaking or sign along to emphasize something)

and she luckily for his anxiety, she doesnt know how to have a normal conversation either.

Her (platonic as well as romantic) love language is studying and research, and Nino seems very cool and she likes him, even if she is awful at holding a conversation with him or doing anything to show it.

She thinks he’s so cool and such an amazing talented kind friend. She has so much love for him that she doesnt know what to do with it. So she channels that energy into learning to sign through the internet and whatever tools she can find

And then after a while of this, she’s like “oh no, he’s gonna think that’s so creepy, I cant tell him I know sign language or he’ll be so uncomfortable”

So, like a whole idiot, she hides that she’s learning sign language from anyone. Because OBVIOUSLY if word got back to Nino, he’d assume it was because of him and that she was a weirdo he shouldn’t be friends with

But also Kagami accidentally falls in love with sign language because she has undiagnosed autism. She always assumed that communicating was just going to be impossible no matter what, but as she gets proficient in sign language she’s like,,, oh,,, OH,, this is very nice

Even just signing while she talks makes it so much easier to keep words and sentances straight, but she only does it when she’s alone with her mother, who is literally blind and would never know.

They become closer friends in late high school, and by that time a lot of Nino’s anxiety has worn off and he’s become completely comfortable letting teachers know when he needs to hear somthing, and middle school feels like a distant dream

At some point, Nino invites Kagami to his house a few times, and he signs with his mom. Nino is like “I can interpret for you,” and Kagami is like “wow thanks, I’m so lucky, because I obviously do not know any sign language, why would I have learned it, and also for the record it is brand new information to me that you can sign,” and Nino is like “cool? Its not a secret but im glad i told you if you somehow didnt already know,” and Kagami is like, “yep :)”

But then eventually as they become really close, they are texting one night, (Kagami can still barely get out of her house, so they need to communicate remotely. And both of then HATE phone calls bc its so hard to understand whats happening, but neither of them have admitted this to anyone)

Nino admits that he likes using sign language better than talking, and he wishes he could use it with his friends, but he’d feel so guilty asking them to learn an entire language just to make him slightly more comfortable. He can talk and hear OKAY so he shouldnt put the pressure on them.

and Kagami is like “you could always ask, worst case scenerio they say no, and i dont think thats an unreasonable demand” and nino is like “it is though,” and kagami’s like “ok so haha funny story, please dont hate me” and nino is like, “…what.” And kagami confesses everything and nino is like “why… why would i hate you for that?” And Kagami is like “oh wait youre right im stupid,”

And then Nino’s also like “hey if YOURE more comfortable signing too, then why dont YOU ask your friends to sign for you. Do you see what i mean? It’s hard to ask-” and kagami is like, “as your friend i will prove it is not.”

So then Kagami ends up confronting Adrien and Marinette the next day and is like “Hi. This is a sign language dictionary. Learn from it.” And they’re both like “what?” And she’s like “oh wait sorry. Backing up. I’m autistic. I decided like three years ago. Forgot to tell you. And I need you to learn to sign a little bit so you can understand if i sign something at you. If you want, of course. Please :D.” And theyre like “ok sure yeah i can do that.”

(Theyve already learned and accepted that shes extremely direct in asking for things)

So then she texts nino and is like “i did it. Youre welcome.”

But anyway both of them are uncomfortable in crowds and parties: Nino cant hear anyone and Kagami tends to get sensory overload, so they start signing mostly in those situations, and then it starts to sink in that they’re allowed to sign whenever and that the other really IS also comfortable with it.

(Both of them are much more willing to make sacrifices for others than to try something new and intimidating for themself, so this is the perfect situation to trick them into getting out of their comfort zone, ironically by trying to be more comfortable in the long run)

so they will just sit together and hang out and have long conversations while just chilling somewhere in a park or at cafes or whatever. Both of them become chattier than they’ve ever been because talking and understanding is so much easier, and its addicting

And their close friends all become proficient enough in sign language to have simple conversations.

But also Nino and Kagami start sitting together automatically even in group hangouts, and they start hanging out more with just the two of them, and soon neither of them feel bad about asking to hang out in quieter places, because they can justify it knowing that it will also help the other one, and together that makes both of them also more comfortable asking for little accomodations from other friends, if only to prove to the other that they can do it too.

And Kagami has the lesser-known autism side effect where she makes WAY TOO MUCH eye contact. She’s aware of it but that doesnt make it go away. Normally she feels so awkward about it, and overthinks her gaze because she doesnt want to scare people away. But when signing, you literally HAVE to be watching the other person constantly, so she has an excuse to just be herself, and its so relieving

(and also its kind of fun to look at Nino anyway because he can get so animated and his smile is really nice and oh no she is in love a little bit)

And Nino always struggles because he emotionally ALWAYS needs to be the nice polite one. His anxiety sometimes gets the better of him and he’s constantly worried about sending the wrong signals to his friends and coming off as rude somehow. But with Kagami, he can literally just ask?? And she will tell him her honest opinion without making it weird. And its so comfy and so good and he really loves hearing her unfiltered opinions on so many things because she sees the world in such a unique way and she gets so passionate about such little things and then oh no, he is fallen for her before he can realize it

And they also learn that they’re both artists, they both love to just observe the world because even if they;re awkward, people are actually pretty great most of the time, and its fun to observe them and try to capture the world, and they just sit together and sketch, or they watch each other sketch, and the thing is, both of them draw ONLY FOR THEMSELVES, its not a ‘skill,’ and they don;t want it to be, its just private art for relaxation. Somehow, though, its okay if they share their art with each other. They can just sit in comfortable silence for hours while one of them sketches something and the other watches patiently

And they start to get more comfortable with one of their heads resting on the other’s shoulder as they watch them doodle, and sitting so close their legs press together, and soon enough their hands start brushing against each other’s as they walk next to each other and then all of a sudden they’re casually holding hands whenever they’re not signing because it’s nice

They try to share headphones so Nino can share some of his favorite songs and his compositions with Kagami. But try as she might, Kagami can not handle the sensory of only having one earbud in. Nino knows her tells by that point, and he’s not about to let her suffer for a stupid reason, but she REALLY does want to hear his music. They somehow end up with Kagami putting a pair of headphones around her neck and turning up the volume a little bit so she can hear, while Nino rests his head on her shoulder so he can hear just enough to know where she is in the song

And then he has to sit up and scootch away just enough to see her hands so they can talk about it, and they both pretend not to notice how nice it was to snuggle as they sign. Its fine, though, because now they get the excuse to just look at each other again and sign overdramatically with exaggerated facial expressions, and no one else around can overhear their conversation, and Nino likes to go a little over the top when signing onomatopoeia and acting out particular parts of the song rhythm that he likes, and Kagami laughs, and they both mentally save the image of each other in this moment the same way that they look at reference images for artwork, memorizing the lines of each movement and the things that make each smile unique,

and Nino also shows up at every single one of her fencing tournaments, and he sits as close as he can and signs encouraging messages to her from the crowd whenever she’s not actively competing, (that her blind mom can never catch, which is somewhat of a bonus to Kagami, because every element of their friendship that her mother cant interact with makes this more personal and special and HERS). Every little sign she sends back at him, even a simple thank you, always feels so good and rebellious and free because shes supposed to be focusing on fencing but shes deciding to care more about friendship. And even if she’s expected to leave immediately afterword, she’ll find every excuse possible to find him and give him a hug, which he’ll always accept even though she jokingly warns him shes sweaty and gross

And eventually they are special best friends and it brings them instant joy to see each other and theyre able to interact for no reason other than that they want to and like each other

(And then they kiss)

[scoupssolo]

moots with seventeen members?

ok i will try but also im terrible at this stuff so be warned. this is so all over the place... i just typed stuff so i apologize.

@dongkwan with Cheol. first of all because i trust mare to compliment him at all moments about everything like he deserves 🤧 and also because i think that they would be cute and giggly soft beans together and they could go for walks and take pictures together and i would cry (in support)

@hwiyoungies and Wonu. they both remind me of that feeling of being in a warm, quiet little coffee shop on a cold day. Very safe and easy to talk with. also wonu i very head empty and needs someone to make sure hes doing ok and i trust belle to make sure of that lol

@heartgyus with Mingyu. he spends too much time away from her to be with Cheol ( i get it but pls gyu stop neglecting Rhys do you have any idea how many ppl are in love w her???) he needs to take her to a tiny bakery and buy her something pink and hearshaped and be cute w her ffs

@jihooned and hannie. both a little evil, theyre very unafraid to tell you their opinions, but also wants to help and cares very much. wants you to be better, and will tease you to help get you there

@reyofseokshine and Josh. looks can be deceiving. seems very soft and sweet and innocent then BAM actually insanely chaotic. would love to see how much they could get away with together. prtending they have no IDEA what you're talking about....

@coupsnim with Minghao. i think Izzie and Hao could paint together and it would be somewhere outside and calm and hao would make some tea and theyd be painting flowers and it would be beautiful.

@soonwnu with DK. theyre two of the most genuinely sweet and supportive people. and i think theyd be very adorable and happy and they both deserve to be supported the way the support everyone else

@000png and woozi. lots of head bitch in charge energy but also very willing to be helpful and kind when someone needs it. both insanely creative and absolute geniuses. I bet if Hoon showed zero how music prgrams work zero would accidentally become crazy good at it asdghjk

@seohoshi and Hosh. Hoshi is the literal sun and nele is the moon. they're opposite energy would go so perfectly together. plus hoshi would love having someone to go along with his bs and nele is always willing to humor the ppl she cares about and their (read: my) insanity <3

@soonhoonsol and Vernon. I think Chey would do well to be with Vernon and his more laid back approach. he doesnt over think and i think that would be good for Chey who is amazing and wonderful and talented as heck and Vernon would be good at reminding her of that.

@merry-kwanmas and boo. Seungkwan is bursting with energy and drama and very much needs love and attention all the time and a safe space from hoshi. he needs that too, and i think mars would be perfect.

@woozi with Dino. I think Yza's absolute Lee Chan brain rot would please Chan and that hed do so much just to purposefully torture her. but also theyre both incrediably giving and hard working ppl who would do anything for the ppl they care about. also could bond over being clowed by their friends. ya know cute things asfgx

and for fun @redberetjisung and jun. both actually the funny friend. very creative and talented but also if not doing the thing is an option they will simply judge from the sideline.

[knee615]

911LS 2x12

after watching 2x12 multiple times, i have some unpopular opinions about that scene that i want to bring up. i’ve seen a lot of anger, and while i understand and i am not going to justify it (at all... it wasn’t okay), i wanted to put my thoughts out there. 

tw: addiction, overdose, abuse, emotional abuse, toxic family dynamics, brief (very brief) mentions of suicide scene in 2x11, gun violence, anxiety/depression (if i’m missing anything please please please let me know so i can add it)

this will be broken down roughly into the following sections

family dynamics

mental health

addiction

terrible parenting

work

final thoughts

~~~~~~~~~~~

family dynamics

tk: its very clear that tk has a lot of issues when it comes to his father, especially when his father is being put at risk. his family, especially him and his dad, have a weirdly close relationship (example: when owen came in after getting the hair treatment and tk asked if he got laid, when he woke up from the coma and they immediately started talking about zoe/carlos like they were best friends not a father/son). they talk about things (read: tk talks about things and owen acts like he does). they’ve struggled but they're typically open about a lot of things most parents wouldn't be with their kids. 

carlos: carlos was raised in a very traditonal household where his father was, in a lot of senses, emotionally stunting carlos. he taught him that he wasnt allowed to cry and that he was too soft to be a police officer. he was scared to lose his parents, but they werent the best role models when it came to sharing emotions with them. he wasnt ever allowed to show emotions and he always had to be strong and protect those who he cared about. (this is what makes me, and a lot of other fans, think carlos has siblings, particularly sisters)

mental health

its obvious that both boys are struggling with mental health. tk has separation anxiety with people he loves because he thinks theyre going to leave him, he struggles with depression (”everything is gray”) and he has a lot of trauma that he hasnt ever worked through. not to mention the tension between his parents, him constantly being in terrifying near-death experiences at work, the pandemic, and his entire life changing. tk has shown this kind of aggression in the past, and people ignoring that and saying its out of character for him to do this is just a way to excuse this as shitty writing and infantilizing tk. he has shown this type of aggression in the past. he got in a bar fight, he shoved judd, he stormed out of owen’s intervention. when tk feels threatened, he pushes people away (physically and emotionally) carlos also clearly has unresolved trauma from his childhood and struggles with anxiety. this is clear by him not wanting to tell his parents he has a boyfriend, seeking his fathers approval and getting emotional/doubting himself when he doesnt get it, etc. 

addiction

as someone who has grown up around every type of addiction possible and seen people overcome it and people being destroyed by it, tk’s reaction was normal. his father was being threatened, he feels like his sobriety and his life (owen saved him) is because of owen. he constantly seeks his fathers approval and love because he never got it as a child. 

in the past year+ (the timeline of the show is relatively unclear) tk has 

-proposed to his “soulmate”

-gotten rejected

-found out his boyfriend was cheating on him

-relapsed after years of sobriety

-almost died

-was saved (again) by his father

-moved across the country from NYC to texas (a big culture shock)

-tried to have a casual fwb situation that turned into more

-found out his dad has cancer (and told other people before him)

-fought with judd

-got shot (by a child)

-was in a coma

-didnt know if he wanted to be a firefighter anymore

-decided he wanted to save people

-almost died (again) in the bus

-tore his stitches

-got in a new relationship

-his parents were fwb

-the pandemic hit

-his parents were pregnant 

-his parents were together again

-”im gonna be a father” (genuinely fuck owen for that)

-his parents fought and involved him

-carlos told his parents they were friends

-the baby wasnt owens

-a year of sobriety

-he got kidnapped/pistol whipped

-his parents broke up and his mom was moving back to nyc

-his dad is depressed

-judd and grace car accident

-owen playing amateur detective

-owens surgery

-he moved in with carlos

-owen got “arrested”

idk about you, but i felt anxious just writing that list. now imagine tk, fresh off a year of sobriety after almost dying, and going through all of that. its a lot. tk is clearly stressed and is dealing with a lot of emotional turmoil. theyre clearly setting up for a storyline about tk’s addiction, so instead of just having his addiction reappear one day, theyre setting it up. as someone who has been around addiction their whole life, these stressors and triggers are going to limit tk’s emotional control. (i’m not DEFENDING tk’s actions, just explaining why they make sense). 

as a police officer, carlos has obviously dealt with addiction before, and knowing the kind of person carlos is, the night tk got in the bar fight and ended up in the police station and telling carlos he was an addict, carlos absolutely went home and did the most research he could to ensure tk was comfortable around him. (he probably even sneakily asked michelle what he could do to make an addict more comfortable). he and tk have probably dealt with tk having cravings/talking about his addiction/etc in the past. carlos knows how he gets. 

terrible parenting

we knew owen sucked as a father, we knew gabriel wasnt the greatest (though i was rooting for a redemption arc for him tbh), but this was irredeemable. they both put their jobs above their sons and their relationship. owen especially, as hes aware of tk’s addiction and his lack of emotional control when it comes to his father. (can we please talk about how it took billy saying he thought raymond was talking to gabriel when he said hed take the most important thing from him for his to realize he was talking about tk and not the firehouse because what?????????) ((also can we talk about owen, billy, tommy, and judd fucking around and joking in the back of the ambulance while tk and carlos were outside traumatized because no ones talking about that and it makes me so beyond angry???)

i have a feeling andrea gave owen and gabriel a piece of her mind after this because genuinely wtf. 

work

the situation ultimately sucked. but its important to note the setting and their jobs. when carlos walked in to the firehouse, he walked in as a police officer when tk approached him as his boyfriend. you can tell by their posture and their tones. yeah it sucked that judd told carlos to leave and he was left alone, but they were at work. they couldnt just turn it into a couples therapy session and the firefam couldnt just stand up for carlos. im willing to bet judd ripped into tk when he was calm enough, but they had to maintain the peace because they were at work. 

final thoughts 

obviously tk shouldnt have pushed carlos. you should never put your hands on someone else (especially in a romantic relationship) and it was wrong. yes, tk should've apologized and the show shouldn't have brushed over it. but, i firmly believe they had a conversation about it. 

also, going back to mental health: tk has anxiety. carlos shut down the conversation when tk tried to apologize before dinner. carlos shut it down. he probably shut it down during the original conversation as well. this probably has to do with his upbringing and his hesitancy to show emotion. it also makes sense that tk would back down when carlos shut it down because he doesnt want to annoy carlos and make him angry. thats how anxiety works, it manifests as your worst fears and causes you to react accordingly. 

to make it clear, im not justifying tk’s actions and think it was wrong. but people saying its out of character is just excusing the behavior as bad writing and, again, infantilizing tk. infantilizing grown men, especially gay men, is a very common occurrence and its not okay. tk is not a child, hes not some perfect baby golden retriever. hes flawed, he struggles with addiction every day (even if hes sober at the moment) and dismissing his past actions and struggles and saying this is out of character is wrong. 

he was wrong. and its okay that he did something wrong. hes human. the writers need to do a better job at taking these serious topics and their possible outcomes into consideration when theyre approving the episodes (the suicide scene without a content/trigger warning), but the fans need to be better at understanding the nuances of mental health and addiction. i understand its frustrating but its NOT out of character for tk to act like this. 

~~~~~

tl;dr: tk was wrong to shove carlos, but it makes sense in terms of his character and his past. also carlos doesnt know how to talk about emotions so he shut tk’s apology down.