#they're worse in high school
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btw it's really hard writing romance for st sg from highschool with... any oc. the two of them truly are unbearable. I straight up knew boys like them just (thank god) with no magic obv. i think the only reason i can write any kind of situationship/romantic curiosity involving these two is, again, i knew and liked people like this. they're fun people to orbit, things are always happening between them. they create drama if there's none to be found and they look like they experience secret things but don't think others are important enough to even show off for. shoko has the right idea - running away, because if they notice you watching their two man guildenstern and rosencrantz bit like one might watch a german car crash, there's every chance they pull you into it and... leave you out to dry when they inevitably entangle back with one another.
#yes I know it's high school drama#they're worse in high school#so much worse#high school st sg truly treat other people like chew toys#they'll go back to ones they like#but you're not a fully fleshed out person#not until after riko when they're both supremely messed up#and leaning hard into other bad coping mechanisms#suguru is way more condescending#satoru is way angrier “righteousness i hate that stuff”#someone tried to teach him responsibility and he hated that#vs suguru whose life has been that of a commoner living a literal nightmare with no one to help#so he has to make that suffering mean something#jjk#jjk meta#io shitposts#gojo satoru#getou suguru#ieri shoko#io.myy#from the margins
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what i like about movies like Heathers is they ask "what if teenage girls committed atrocities?" and then they take a good hard look at teenage girls and conclude that what's already going on is worse
#murder and terrorism? not ideal but somehow LESS gruesome than the Actual Everyday Crimes of High School Bullies#and the thing is they're not Wrong#i mean yes the former is *technically* worse than the latter#but it just doesn't capture that CHILL FACTOR u know#(also just a sidenote but i feel like Mean Girls very much definitely deserves to be included in the category 'if u enjoyed Heathers')#like Mean Girls is not TECHNICALLY a psychological thriller. but also it Completely Is
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Starting to slowly realise I'm really not doing well mentally and it's. concerning. I feel like I should take a break from tumblr bc it takes some of what little energy I have but it's also my source of joy with friends so idk what to do, like I'd miss y'all more than I'd feel good about being away. But if you notice me talking less/not responding in days it's bc I just cannot. I leave your message notifs up so I don't forget tho <3
#Personal#Feeling dreadful bc so many friends have shared with me things they wrote that I SO GENUINELY AM EXCITED TO READ#I've just had literally no time nor energy for ANYTHING I enjoy in like a month#And I'm also literally not sleeping. I'm either not sleeping or I have recurring nightmares that wake me up. It's god-awful#Therapy isn't helping either cause atp I already know everything they're advising me about it's just not working#Nothing's changed either which ofc makes me feel worse. No meds changed no habits changed nothing crazy happened#I'm just suddenly worse than I've been in years which is Not Good#I feel awful for not being able to read my friends' things if I could let y'all see my mind you'd know I want to read what you write so bad#I just can't right now. I'm sorry#Not to mention work and school have been especially more demanding recently and I literally get home after 8 every single night#Don't even eat dinner til past 10pm#Doing hw until 3am etc etc#It's like high-school all over again but I'm an adult with more responsibilities than ever
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Okay hear me out. What if Hornblower and Lady Barbara but they're high school math olympians and also have a crazy psychosexual rivalry with each other
#the vibes here are mean girls btw#high school academic competitions bring out insane behaviors and olympiads are even worse. and i want them to have that#lady barbara 'comes from a dynasty of math olympians and has 50x harvard legacy' wellesley#vs. horatia 'public school kid whose school has never even won a math competition but she's gonna win the fields medal' hornblower#(yeah she's trans. she's always trans she has to be trans in that book i'm sorry)#the rivalry never actually comes to anything. or they have like A Single Kiss and then are like what if we never talked about that again#it needs to be extremely early 00s teen girl movie coded. everything is subtext but they're both insane#anyways if anyone wants to write this go wild i have like 60 pages of final papers to get through first :(#perce rambles#percy yells at cecil scott#disclaimer: i did not do any olympiads. i know a couple of people who know people who did#i did however do trivia which does bring out similar behaviors i think#also sorry for making them american i just knew i'd make a hash of the british school system ://#tbh i think this would also just make a fun movie in general i think it's what the general public needs
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giving myself an idea for a new fic and trying to stealthily open a blank word document but the tiny edna mode that i installed in my brain for exactly this reason immediately wakes up from a dead sleep and begins smacking me over the head with a rolled-up newspaper
#she doesn't know about tumblr tags though!#anyway. leonard finally accepting that mick is right and he's obsessed with the flash#but obviously just the idea of him#so to cure himself of this he starts shadowing barry around his daily non-flash life#and breaks into his apartment and goes through everything in minute detail#because surely this will put len's temporary insanity to rest#by proving to his own brain that barry allen is just Some Guy. he's boring. even worse: he's twenty-six.#but obviously it backfires#and len finds himself scowling at the salt-and-pepper shakers that iris west made for barry in a high school ceramics class#and they're totally mishappen and leaking salt and pepper from the bottoms but barry still has them loyally out on his table#he finds a box of milkbones in the pantry and hopes it's some puppy play kink that len can mock him for#but no it's because his elderly neighbor's dogs gets loose once a week and barry always helps her go round them up#when len DOES find the kinky things they're expensive and well-researched and depressingly right up len's alley#and len ends up just as obsessed with barry allen as he is the flash#he gives up and steals the salt and pepper shakers and swaps them for a cardboard set from the grocery store#with a note inside the salt shaker that gives barry an address and a time for that saturday night#and a p.s. that says to bring the silk rope
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Omg...... Like Mother, Like Daughter is doomed Yuri (half yuri? One sided yuri?). TT0TT Sol doesn't feel the same way I'm pretty sure (sadly), but Som is DEF down bad. TT0TT And Som's not exactly the most mentally stable jakfjdksalfj (I think she has a bit of a "Sol's my pet" vibe going on as well. Som means well but she is NOT healthy either jfakslfj oh this is just going to be a fucking wreck I'm ready let's GO!)
(spoilers under cut, also under cut cause length and pictures)
Like she saw the boy Sol is hanging out with and was just ">:("
*sobbing* She is SO DONE when she finds out they are dating TT0TT
*sobs* ahhhh! klasjfdk OhmyGOAD SHE is tREMBLING as Sol tells her how she got with the guy TT0TT
She is literally SULLEN that Sol and guy have been dating FOR A MONTH! she looks os SICK TT0TT
My poor girl is literally doing the Arthur fist clench with her fist TT0TT
Som! Som! Girlie! I don't think this is just a friendship for you anymore.
LKFJDASKLFJKLAJFKL WAIT
"Anyone can see at first glance that he's good for nothing. But how does she not see that?"
OHHHHH MY GOD SHE'S LIEK 'HE SMELLY. HE STANK. HE POOR. HE BROKE. HE TOO NORMAL FOR HER." GURL! GET OFF THE FLOOOOOR!
"To be honest, I wish they'd break up" NO YOU DON'T SAY???? nEVER WOULD'VE GUESS!
Oh I was just here for the matricide but I've been blessed with more angst! Let's goooooo!!!!!!!!!
#“i'm sorry silly.... what's this about matricide?” Her moms a killer and killed her brother and she's just an absolute controlling pscyho-#-to the point som thought SHE was going to die before she got to high school if she didn't get perfect grades#lady deserves it but this isn't about her atm#like mother like daughter#like mother like daughter webtoon#like mother like daughter spoilers#i need to yap about this i'm sorry TT0TT#i had a feeling when she said 'life partner' in the other episode#the korean word can mean like an actual romantic partner buuuuut one of the words has been associated with pets#and she did compare sol to a pet in a sense#Somyung Gil#Look-Alike Daughter#똑 닮은 딸#webtoon#oh wait i never posted the other thing kafjdlksajflk TT0TT#som sweetie let's not call your crush a “stray dog”#the term you are looking for is “girlfriend”#now go listen to “i wanna ruin our friendship” and “good luck babe” you'll feel better#ugh I skipped a head a few chapters and the author is pushing some guys on som TT0TT#(I don't mind the boys they're cute but ahfkljsaklf you got me ATTACHED to Sol don't switch up on me now???)#For real tho Som needs therapy not a partner. Get her away from her mom and let her recover#I love how it's showing her slowly spiral into a villain arc and yesss I saw her becoming way too obsessed with Sol but oof there's some#def romantic tension in there and that's juicy#But right now things are just going to get worse if Som stays near her mom TT0TT#hopefully this thriller isn't a tragedy I need my girl to win!
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how the HECK do I explain to my parents that I do not want bass guitar lessons from my dad, I want to teach myself from the books and videos that I have. I will literally throw away every plan I have to learn this instrument if I have to learn this way I'm not even kidding. this is why I quit guitar after two months my freshman year of high school.
#and I live in their house and pay pretty much no bills so it's not like I can make my own decision on this#like lol. I have no agency to choose to do things I want to do because my parents foot all my bills and unfortunately#they're actually really good parents despite the fact that I get frustrated with them so I actually do respect them#this would be much easier if they sucked.#I don't DO WELL with music lessons!!! I'm a self-learner I thought we learned this when I was in HIGH SCHOOL#I'm too much of a perfectionist to do ''proper'' lessons bc I get so stressed out and embarrassed whenever I do stuff wrong#that it completely shuts my brain down!! and it's WORSE with my DAD because I ESPECIALLY want to do well with him#like... this is why learning hobbies from my parents DOESN'T work for me!! I want it to be FUN not a fucking... class#and now I'm ticked off and about to cry when we were supposed to be having a fun family holiday outing. yay
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this is LITERALLY how my teachers talked about me when i was in school and then they're surprised when i dropped out (none of them were actually. they didnt care lmao)
#“how can you be in seventh grade and not have your basic multiplication tables memorized”#GIRL YOU TELL ME????#tbf my entire year was stupid as hell couldnt name a single canadian province other than the one we live in when we were in high school#couldnt do multiplication or basic french sentences. saying this w/ love bcuz i also couldnt do those things <3#you're angry at students for being so stupid but what are they supposed to do?? they can't magically go inside their own head#and fix whatever is wrong with their brain. you're angry bcuz they dont understand but why is that THEIR FAULT#i got a lot of this esp when I was in math class. teachers angry i didnt get what they were teaching after the 1000th time#as if it wasn't worse for me being unable to understand no matter what they did. at least they get to go home at the end of the day#knowing they're smarter and better than I am#txt
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In the Chapter 6 trial, Bates references a note left alongside the bucket. Since we never get to see what the note read, I was sort of wondering what it actually said.
Probably something along the lines of "we all hate your ass kys". Honestly though, looking back on how communication in Japan generally works, I think there probably wouldn't have been a note at all and the "we all hate your ass kys" is implicit. (Or it's 50/50, a quarter of the cast is from the US and would probably take the time to write it out?)
#like have you ever met a pissed off teenager#lately ive been thinking these teenagers should have been brattier about being doxxed to millions#nothing in this story should be justified and they all should get worse. ive decided#also how did this high school even get dorms tbh#hpa could get away with it bc they're huge and famous#how did this school's founder (one guy) get away with buying out tokyo real estate#this is the crow post aslh arc btw. gettin real into worldbuilding#ask and you shall receive#not aslh
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nervous bc i've lost so much fkn weight and i keep losing more faster & faster. food doesn't seem to absorb it just hurts my guts. my doctors are trying to figure it out but it takes time and i've already lost 2kg in a single month (11 kg since i was diagnosed at the start of the year)
#i haven't been this thin since high school and i honestly do not want to be i feel so weak#and i can't have any treats any more :(( i miss pancakes..#ate salmon today (maybe a bad idea) just unseasoned and steamed and nearly cried bc it had actual flavour#it's a known side effect of my immunossupressants but it could be other stuff too who knows. they're lowering my dose tho to see if it help#but it will probably make my other symptoms worse#ką sako lapė
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if one more person says to take an anti-inflammatory pain killer when you have a concussion i'm going to Lose It
#you should be cautious with pain killers in general for concussions because you want to be able to feel if it gets worse#so you can go to the hospital#but anti inflammatory meds could potentially increase internal bleeding depending on the person and could slow the healing process#i got a really bad concussion in my sophmore year of high school and my doctor ran me through so much stuff like this#sometimes it shocks me how laid back people are about concussions#they're BRAIN DAMAGE#THEY"RE DANGEROUS#THEY MAKE YOU MORE SUSEPTABLE TO FUTURE BRAIN INJURIES#anyway#on today's episode of shor no one asked
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//mr & mrs tweak are my favorite sicko4sicko ship
#misc :: ( ooc )#//THEY'RE FREAKS!!!!#//richard is absolutely a Wife Guy#//he adores his wife and constantly talks about how great being married is#//(his wife is just as severely fucked in the head as he is)#//they each found somebody who suits their level of morality and every single day they make each other worse 💖#//THAT'S REAL LOVE BABEY!!!#//i just knoooowww their sex is insane too#//would love to be sandwiched in the middle of them tbh#//getting mildly more confident in my grasp on the tweaks & the tuckers - the tweaks especially#//they're so in love they're soooooo in love#//gaslight gatekeep girlboss / mansplain manipulate manwhore solidarity#//i'm laughing at that jacked football player who had a crush on mrs tweak in high school who was gonna try to fight richard for her#//sorry dude you're not evil enough for her#//homie never stood a SLIVER of a chance#//i know the show makes it out like ''oh he just moved away'' like... nothing happened; it's very anticlimatic#//but in my heart and my mind's eye richard fucked him up so bad psychologically and emotionally that he HAD to disappear#//and mrs tweak was like THAT WAS SO GODDAMN SEXY and threw herself at him#//LKFDJSALKJFSKDJF
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How do you deal with the loneliness? And I don't mean a 'do it alone' kind of way. I do things alone all the time, I have no problem with doing things alone. I mean, I have one friend (I think we're friends), and he lives in another state. My sister only likes me because I drive her places and pay for things for her and has told me that if I wasn't her brother, she'd hate me. And not even for anything I've done, just because the way I dress and the music I listen to isn't punk enough for her. I try meeting new people and making friends, but no one will talk to me, and when I try to initiate a conversation, they cut me off and ignore me. Strangers make fun of fun of me for just existing.
And now I have to move somewhere where its not even safe for me to leave the house on my own. And I have to live my parents who are "fine" with me being trans as long as they "don't have to change the way they refer" to me, in terms of name and pronouns. And they're requiring that I quit school and acting for good.
When is it just time to give up?
#this was my moms first Halloween in the town they're living in#and they said they stopped giving out candy after 20 minutes#because over half the kids in the neighborhood were dressed up as the kkk#and singing out joining it when they grow up#and thats where im going to have to live for at least 6 months#as a visibly trans person#and even after that 6 months it's not like I can afford to go anywhere else#the only option id have for getting out#would be to do what my mom wants and go to trade school and become and electrician#and then hope i could get a job somewhere else#i should have just killed myself in high school#everythings just gotten worse and worse from there#and it was already bad then#but now i dont want to kill myself#so im just stuck miserable and broken#op
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Can we talk about how middle school/high school staff always encourage students to reach out to school counselors "if you ever need help" but then when you actually need help the only fucking thing they're good for is being trigger happy with a psych ward visit or are we not ready to talk about that yet
#why are we encouraged to reach out to them if they're only equipped to handle basic school stress and anxiety#some kids have fucked up shit happen to them and come to an adult they're told they can trust and it makes it worse#no wonder depression and withdrawl is so fucking common in youth#im high and angry like wtf#especially if you need help with a family situation they pull the “my hands are tied” and its like BRO who tf else are they supposed to#reach out to#fuck the American school system dear god
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oooo lovely (/sar), I'm having a hard time reading the captions/titles/words on the TV now
#probably gonna wear my contacts for a few days to try to make up for how little I've been wearing them#not that it's really gonna do much but kinda slow down my eyes getting worse#i already had a hard time reading things on school white boards n shit last school year#gonna be way fuckin worse this next year#not excited to have to put this shit onto my 504#cause knowing some of my teachers they're just gonna ignore it because i go to an advanced studies school#which obviously means i can't have disabilities because... i take all honors classes??#anyways ableism in my school is very high and I'm not excited to have to work around this shit with ableist teachers#tw vent
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oh my god it's 9 am
#🌙.rambles#i'm not rlly sleepy.. n i'm busy 😭😭 so much to do fr#i'm being productive at least but i think i'm. i'm using this productivity too as a distraction#from my loneliness. from my thoughts n my burdens n regrets. my regrets.. they're so burdening fr oh my god#my regrets.. they're so burdening fr oh my god#i try to take my mind off being too. meticulous ig or really just placing too much importance on my school performance#generally i've always been doing well.#i had high honors after all back in gr8 n i think it was just the subjects in filipino that pulled my grades down in middle school#i am.. not the best w filipino but my grammar is good. i'm good w systems n idk generally just acads#but my proficiency in the language itself makes me perform worse :/#other than that i do great w everything else#back when we had exams (my school took them away now ever since the pandemic) i would always do well#always one of the top of my class. never quite the best ig but perhaps second.#if i was.. born in another country in the first place i think i'd be even better than i am right now#without filipino fuck that i have nothing but hatred for it#it's useless to me. all my life everything's just proved it's worthlessness#i don't want to stay in this country at all. i hate it here.#i've tried to love my country before but.. it's so lonely here. so much of it has given me pain#n though there r things dear to me like my friends n family here n wtvr#i wouldn't trade that at all. those r rlly just the things i hold on to#it's so. infuriating thinking of if i had education from a more developed country.. i'm naturally intelligent.#it's in my genes fr n i've always worked hard. my curiosity is insatiable and has brought me far#this country is a hindrance to me and my hatred for it is honestly just unfathomable.#loneliness; most of my life i grew up not having friends sharing my interests. now it's better though at least. i'm v grateful for that#but the environment as a whole is so. different i guess. imagining na n europe n australia.. their cons n all have stuff i'm actually#interested in. yk it feels like a miracle just seeing something other than genshin in this country. it's too simple n boring here. it hurts#careers i want to pursue are far from ideal here. they're too difficult. career choices r v limited n i don't think education is enough#there's rlly just so much hinderances in my life here. not to mention the humiliation i faced by my peers w. my accent when speaking filo..#i've always been good at grammar but. w the influence of my interests i do have a bit of an accent.#no one ever intentionally meant to hurt me but.. i can't deny it yk? even if it was just for fun.. being laughed at really hurt.
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