#i had high honors after all back in gr8 n i think it was just the subjects in filipino that pulled my grades down in middle school
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noxtivagus · 2 years ago
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oh my god it's 9 am
#🌙.rambles#i'm not rlly sleepy.. n i'm busy 😭😭 so much to do fr#i'm being productive at least but i think i'm. i'm using this productivity too as a distraction#from my loneliness. from my thoughts n my burdens n regrets. my regrets.. they're so burdening fr oh my god#my regrets.. they're so burdening fr oh my god#i try to take my mind off being too. meticulous ig or really just placing too much importance on my school performance#generally i've always been doing well.#i had high honors after all back in gr8 n i think it was just the subjects in filipino that pulled my grades down in middle school#i am.. not the best w filipino but my grammar is good. i'm good w systems n idk generally just acads#but my proficiency in the language itself makes me perform worse :/#other than that i do great w everything else#back when we had exams (my school took them away now ever since the pandemic) i would always do well#always one of the top of my class. never quite the best ig but perhaps second.#if i was.. born in another country in the first place i think i'd be even better than i am right now#without filipino fuck that i have nothing but hatred for it#it's useless to me. all my life everything's just proved it's worthlessness#i don't want to stay in this country at all. i hate it here.#i've tried to love my country before but.. it's so lonely here. so much of it has given me pain#n though there r things dear to me like my friends n family here n wtvr#i wouldn't trade that at all. those r rlly just the things i hold on to#it's so. infuriating thinking of if i had education from a more developed country.. i'm naturally intelligent.#it's in my genes fr n i've always worked hard. my curiosity is insatiable and has brought me far#this country is a hindrance to me and my hatred for it is honestly just unfathomable.#loneliness; most of my life i grew up not having friends sharing my interests. now it's better though at least. i'm v grateful for that#but the environment as a whole is so. different i guess. imagining na n europe n australia.. their cons n all have stuff i'm actually#interested in. yk it feels like a miracle just seeing something other than genshin in this country. it's too simple n boring here. it hurts#careers i want to pursue are far from ideal here. they're too difficult. career choices r v limited n i don't think education is enough#there's rlly just so much hinderances in my life here. not to mention the humiliation i faced by my peers w. my accent when speaking filo..#i've always been good at grammar but. w the influence of my interests i do have a bit of an accent.#no one ever intentionally meant to hurt me but.. i can't deny it yk? even if it was just for fun.. being laughed at really hurt.
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princelee-chang · 4 years ago
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chang for the character meme ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Why I like them there’d been no one on his side since he was a lonely scared boy in the palace but it didnt stop him from being there for his people over and over again. he  saved his kingdom by listening to his people, the commoners, whom he respected and valued, those lower than him in status, who’d been forgotten, used, ignored and written off. he kicked down nobles to the ground and called them / o u t  / in broad daylight left and right. he refused for Anyone to die for his sake regardless of their social status. he was inexperienced, sheltered and unprepared to lead and protect and didnt always have all the answers, yet did what he Could do in the circumstances and Grew into his role of king even if he had to learn the hard way. also l i s t e n hes a handsome noble prince, a skilled swordsman a hero whos all heart and a lil bit of a mischievous shit honestly not only up my alley but down my driveway all the way up to the front DOOR i never a CHANCE your h o n or this was never a fair fight i - 
Why I don’t not to be a copy cat but theres also nothing i dont like about chang. even his ~flaws~  only serve to make me love him more. hes naive, idealisitc and emotional. even when he was being a spoiled lil shit in the beginning had its Charms and also added to him as a whole bec i think without that starting point in the beginning of s1, you wouldnt have fully appreciated how much he grew and how far we went at the end of s2. and it made him human. most prince archetypes are either like too campy in their rogueish and r E b e L L i O u S behavior or too Good and Altruistic and Perfect to the point where theyre like too distant and difficult to relate too. i like that chang wasnt always selfless and that he gives in so readily to his emotions. also i love how hes still so clueless and awkward and so Young in the ways of the outside world and so sheltered he knows how to navigate the world of politics and snakes and can cut down zombies left and right but he cant fish hes hopeless outside the palace walls skdhfalsk
Favorite episode (scene if movie) his crowning moment imho is s2ep6 where he specifically told them to choose mu yeongs son over him, told the historians to erase everything he did from the history books. he was willing to let go of what could have been his legacy all to ensure the safety, peace and stability of his kingdom and his people by taking himself out of the narrative, by sparing a life and not wanting power for himself. the haewon cho clan was so obsessed with legacy and power and lineage that they stole a child, murdered women and children, caused a famine and a plague,used the sick and dying to win a war and resurrected and demoralized the kings and innocents bodies and lied and did horrible selfish things in the name of the kingdom to ensure their bloodline. and here comes lee chang who didnt want the throne which is what he was told would be the only thing that wouldve ensured his life and he gave all that up HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Favorite season/movie SEASON 2 hands DOWN. even though it’s also the most cruel season to chang losing all the people he loved one after the other, it was SUCH a sight to see him slowly but surely step UP and fully embrace his role as King. plus so much sword action i just - [ s c  r e a m ]
Favorite line  my man is always delivering dramatic ass speeches and spirit stirring monologues like his life Depends on it and i honestly i love him for it but like where do i even B E G I N. if you can, then strike me down / because i wanted to liv e/  you said i was lucky. no. i was chosen / you are not only incompetent but endlessly v i l e / im different from those who abandoned these people. i will never abandon these people / who are you to decide whom to sacrifice? / i cannt let everyone die because of an incompetent official [by what right?] i am the crown prince  - 
Favorite outfit the one where chang and his squad were wearing all black and he had his sword slung across his back i -  😳
OTP chang/yeong shin, chang/seo bi, chang/sleep. (also i am Looking at the possibility of him and witch lady at the end of s2 >:) )
Brotp seo bi and yeong shin <3
Head Canon my man is Intelligent. my man is a Dumbass. no i will not elaborate <3
Unpopular opinion poppular consensus wanted him to be king and i did too but actually it would have been a nice way to further his arc and make it all come full circle if he had stayed in hanyang with mu yeongs son since chang was a boy all alone in the palace with three failed father figures/mentors and he’d be the mentor he wished he had. plus the idea of chang, yeong sin and seo bi raising their boy king together is T_T 
A wish for him to get some sleep, some rest, to be happy pls T_T
An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen CAN THE PEOPLE HE LOVES STOP DYING IN HIS ARMS OR LEAVINIG HIM THAT WOULD BE GR8 THX
5 words to best describe them compassionate. benevolent. honorable. idealistic. Handsome ™
My nickname for them everyone on the show calls him Your Highness or Your Majesty so its special to me just calling him chang <3
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