#they're so goddamn funny
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THE RICKROLLING?? THE NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP REFERENCE?? HELP??????
#I absolutely fucking love this game's references#they're so goddamn funny#they were so fucking real for this#I'm never gonna get over it this is so so amazing#my lord#I love whoever decided to do this so much#honkai Star Rail#honkaiposting#hsr#sparkle#sparkle hsr#honkai
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I FORGOT JAX JUMPING OFF A BUILDING
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horror being very specific with table manners and he berates people (dust and killer) for eating like fucking pigs
i think it'd be morbidly funny that because there was no food in horrortale but the cutlery and stuff was all there that maybe he would pretend to eat with no food on the plate. it was in a satirical way that he would joke maybe around horror paps or alone where he would pretend to eat and have really good table manners but then the satire joke became REAL and now horror is incredibly specific about how to eat food
you MUST hold the fork in the left and knife in right says horror. no killer you can't duel wield the fucking knives this is a table not a slaughterhouse. dust pick up your elbows off the table. actually how about you get your entire upper body off the table tf why are you SLEEPING ON THE FOOD??? killer's sitting fetal position in the chair because of course he wouldn't sit normally like the idiot he is. dust is forced to put his hood down and reveal his face no more mysterious shadow style because it puts horror at ease. they cannot have a single peaceful meal because once they get past the table manners phase it then becomes a completion to see who can eat the least (because they suck at everything including eating)
#hey guys. every time i don't post it feels like i'm abandoning my own children#NOOO im sorry i'll come back home... i wont abandon you chat PLEASE DONT MAKE ME PAY MORE CHILD SUPPORT#i've been a busy little bee i snicker out. and by busy i mean playing. and by playing i mean hi3#i'm sorry my brain literally cannot handle having more than one interest. once i get into something else the other thing becomes ignored#IT MAKE ME SO UPSET BECAUSE WHY CAN'T I DO BOTH OF THESE THINGS I LIKE EQUALLY ☹️☹️☹️☹️ is this a me problem#anyways none of these tags were related to the post. i usually do little extra tidbits adding onto the post when i tag huh#i just recently learned (2 years ago) that youre supposed to put the fork and knife in that order. i still mess it up#i've been drawing on this notebook from the same brand from what i drew on in 2019 AND GODDAMN 🤤🤤🤤#this notebook is SO FUCKING SMOOTH I LOVE IT 🤤🤤 drawing on this paper is like drawing on fucking BUTTER it's delectable#a shame nobody likes traditional art i cry out (i'm not particularly skilled in either traditional or digital)#you could call me a jack of no trades master of none#got this idea bcs i was listening to binomi (HARDCORE MARETU FAN SINCE I GOT A PHONE. WHAT YALL KNOW ABOUT MARETU‼️‼️‼️)#and i was like omg food theme.... horror. so i drew it in earlier mentioned notebook#and i was like hmm what positions should i put the fork and knife. and then i got this idea#i KNOW cannibalism songs aren't exactly horror themed. but let me be delusional i wanna give my boy a cool theme and cannibalism is soo coo#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#tricule hc#bad sanses#bad sans gang#nightmare's gang#this is funny but in a sad way because i added context to it. as is with all my mtt content#it's comedic because i think they're all stupid fucking idiots but i also make them do this dumb shit bc theyre traumatized
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Hey, I was wondering why you think Roxy was destined to end up with Eridan? I get the shared wizard interest and the quirk foreshadowing I guess, but that still seems like a large stretch. It's kinda like saying that Equius and Dirk are going to end up together because they both like robots and horses. It's just seems like the sort of character remixing that Hussie uses a lot in Homestuck. But what do you think?
Roxy
- fucking LOVES WIZARDS
- is a hipster and literally wears a colorswapped version of eridans scarf
- is pink and bubbly
- uses riflekind
- has a perfectly opposite powerset to eridan (can create anything by stealing its void away vs. can destroy anything with pure belief) and are connected to each other through the matriorb
- has a crush on a troubled, eccentric prince so you know that's her type
- quirk cameo with momlonde
Eridan
- Is a wizard
- Is a hipster and literally wears a colorswapped version of roxy's scarf
- Uses riflekind
- Had a huge crush on Feferi, a bubbly pink girl whom he (wrongly) believed to be so nice she might not even be capable of pitch, so we know that's his type
- The equal and opposite powerset & quirk cameo
At the end of the day I can't tell you what to ship, nor am I interested in making anyone ship anything, but I'm kind of just saying, the things that make Roxy predisposed to liking Eridan are, like, the biggest parts of her character, and Eridan is very easy & would pretty much say yes to anybody, but Roxy is also definitely His Type and Eridan is a simp who thrives under any sort of positive attention & would do anything someone asked if they were giving him positive feedback. or attention at all. case in point kanaya fucking hates him but at least she talks to him and he's constantly praising the shit out of her
Jane and Jake also have their introductions IMMEDIATELY followed by talking about how they've got a thing for "cobalt" hunks and "cerulean babes" respectively, so setting up roxy with eridan also fits into a pattern of the b2 kids being set up to date a dead troll. still rereading this part of the comic, but it really jumped out to me how blatant it was for jake and jane
#ship what you want to ship idc but#imo the foreshadowing is pretty blatant#which also fits with eridan because pale erikar was one of the most heavily foreshadowed things in the comic#and imo pitch calliope/eridan was also in the cards though less blatantly#calliope has 'biologically compelled to spades guys that remind her of her brother“ disease (moment of silence)#and eridan has literally been described as a proto-caliborn and also kind of is that#an evil wizard boy obsessed with murder and genocide who has zero social skills#the angel killer and the cherub whose adult form is a snake with wings#the destroyer of hope and the cherub whose adult form features white wings that look like the hope symbol#im just saying they're 50/50 at winning in chess bc theyre that one meme thats like#'my gf who doesnt know how shes losing' 'me whos eating the pieces when she isnt looking'#'BELIEVING IN YOUR PIECES IS NOT A VIABLE CHESS STRATEGY!!!!' like can you imagine#it'd be so goddamn funny if theres anyone capable of hating calliope itd be eridan#eridan (idiot) (mentally ill) (zero social skills) (derogatory)#erirox#eriroxy
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christ alive I love my parents and I'm glad I got to see them but they are just. so fucking exhausting
#i've identified something about them#which is this#they genuinely do not grasp that other people have Real Experiences that don't map to their view of the world#like it's not that they don't view those experiences as valid or whatever#it's that they genuinely and truly do not grok that other people have experiences they don't approve of#like that the experiences actually happen and aren't made up#“why do you insist on referring to X with they/them pronouns?”#“because they don't identify with a gender”#“well you're either one or the other”#“well they don't feel that way and they don't identify with a gender”#“well you're one or the other”#“okay but literally they do not feel that way and you not liking that doesn't change it like wtf and also sex and gender aren't the same”#etc etc etc ad fucking nauseum#fucks sake#also this is always my mom who drops this shit#my dad just pretends like nothing is happening and ignores the conversation like the wuss he is lol#to be fair i get it because i would not go up against my mom either if i was him because he has to live with her stubborn ass#it's probably obvious but they blithely misgendered me the whole goddamn time they were here#UNLESS THEY WERE IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE IN PUBLIC LOLOLOLOLOLOL#HMMMMMMMMM#FUNNY HOW THAT WORKS#anyway fuck them and i hope they get home safe because they're old as fuck and probably going to die in the next 5-10 years#and when they do it will be terrible and also part of me will be relieved and idk how to feel about that tbh#so like#yeah#:/#covington-shenanigans gets personal#(to be clear they just didn't use pronouns for me at all in public)#(they have never once gendered me correctly and probably never will)
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just curious
#one piece#sanuso#usopp#sanji#doodley doots#soul eater au#they're so goddamn funny to think about in this au#also i keep drawing/writing stuff down about sanji being mad at usopp but i just#dont find the appeal in drawing them being neutral with each other lmao#something is being experienced at all times#yknow what i mean
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clint mcelroy creating a dnd character: oh yeah, this bad boy can fit so much simple zest for life in him
#eliot posts#taz#the adventure zone#merle highchurch#zoox anthellae#ive not listened to graduation yet (and idk if i ever will) so idk if this applies to argo or not#i remember so little of amnesty and am only 10 eps into steeplechase so i can't speak for the non dnd campaigns either#it's funny how a lot of people's ttrpg characters often have common themes in them#me and my friend john from our irl dnd group were talking about that and it's like#alicia plays the most Friend Shaped girls imaginable. caleb's Cause Problems On Purpose. julia's are sassy and tend to do their own thing#john's are edgy in theory but extremely friend shaped and caring in practice. and i tend to play The Mom Friend.#not ALWAYS but pretty often. and basically always they're just really looking for human connection (whether they know/accept it or not)#even my goddamned PISS WIZARD is quickly careening towards mom friend territory??? somehow???#very few people tolerate him so he's protective of those who do. even if it's mostly just a coworkers situation in the party#and most of the party is So Fucking Stupid#it's a very hilarious party composition overall. just 5 guys all thinking ''wow. what a bunch of freaks. good thing i'm normal :)''#and the only one who is REMOTELY accurate in that assessment is the cleric whose catchphrase has quickly become#''hey. don't look at me. i just work with them.''
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you know what I take back my vegeta schitts creek headcanon, I think he's david around goku and alexis around everyone else
in my most comedic soul though he is just masc gina linetti
#but the truth is that bulma is the gina linetti to launch's rosa diaz#and vegeta is the rosa diaz to piccolo's captain holt#and piccolo is the captain holt to gohan's amy santiago#and goku is simultaneously peralta boyle and scully#silly hours#dbtag#the gag that EVERYONE in the cast knows Vegeta has a Whole Personality except Goku will never not be funny to me#“Goku he doesn't like you” “aw man :<” just call him an ambulance next time piccolo goddamn asldjalskj#my sibling dynamic hc about them is very 'you're you around your friends but you revert to being Annoyed when your little brother shows up'#but everyone finds your little brother adorable and funny and you're like this is so embarrassing I don't know how he got in here#and he's not all bad he's really not but the problem see is that he's seen you cry so he has to be dead or never speak to anyone you know#they're not Brothers(tm) but that's the dynamic I love between them ksjda That Guy Who Knew Your Season One Self Cannot Be At This Party#That's why he killed Nappa and the rest of Freeza's top brass. No one left to tell embarrassing childhood stories.
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sorry im coping with aus again oopsie daisy. anyway here's my take on a fantasy au
it all started with me rewatching the D&D movie and thinking "hm. what (broad) classes would the neighbors have?"
and after much thinking i came to the conclusion: Barnaby = Bard / Eddie = Paladin / Sally = Sorcerer / Julie = fighter / Frank = monk / Howdy = Artificer / Poppy = Healer / Wally = 'Wizard'
those seem fitting! BUT i don't like restrictions or rules so in this very light worldbuilding for a casual (strongly glaring at myself here) CASUAL au, it's only dnd-esque. not actually dnd yk yk
in my head, they're not technically puppets for this au. they're flesh and blood, they've got bones, etc. they're actual Creatures, though they still look like Them! Julie's still pink w/ candy-corn-horns! Frank is still a gray tube! Barnaby is a big blue dog! they're just... not puppets. it's the same for the other beings in this fantasy world - they all keep the style, but they're all flesh n' blood if that makes sense. a cartoony fantasy world
so they have their little found family adventuring group titled, of course, The Neighborhood. because when they were first forming, Wally went "oh! are we a neighborhood? i've always wanted neighbors!" and it Stuck. so they all lovingly refer to each other as neighbors, even though the closest they get to being actual neighbors is pitching their tents next to each other & staying at an Inn in neighboring rooms
like your classic group of adventurers, they're almost constantly on the move. the longest they stay in one place is a couple of months - the rest of the time they're wandering! they take quests, get roped into general Shenanigans, etc. they adventure! and get into a lot of battles of varying severity
so Barnaby is still kiiiiind of a bard? best i can describe him is jack-of-all-trades moral support! he provides battle music, keeps the mood light, and stands off to the side to offer quips and tips. he prefers not to fight, and only Gets Involved when the others need Backup. even then, he usually takes the role of defending his neighbors. he has a good eye for whether or not physical support is needed - he never needs to be asked when there's a legitimate need for him! unless he's thoroughly distracted from the goings-on. he does have magic, but it's more for show / defense-based
Eddie's still pretty classically a paladin. healing powers, armor, there to be on the front lines and Protect! the group's sword and shield! he technically serves a god but he forgot who <3 he just makes the occasional general offering and mumbles some vague prayer. he's super friendly! super helpful! super willing to dive into the line of fire! Will disregard his own safety without a second thought! his magic is pretty much restricted to healing, and it's weak healing at that (maybe because he can't properly serve his god...), so it's mostly good for quick mid-battle heals and little wounds. temporary fixes!
Sally has innate fire/light magic, and she's very showy with it! she puts Flair and Pizazz into all of her casts and is very dramatic on the battlefield - she manages to turn her fights into a performance. She tag-teams keeping the Neighborhood entertained with Barnaby. he handles the humor/lightheartedness, she handles the escapism/encouragement. she writes scripts & stories in her off-time, and often reads them (or spins a new one) after dinner. when they have weeks / month breaks in one spot, sometimes she'll recruit local thespians to create a play
Frank is all about that hand-to-hand combat babey! he wants to feel bones break under his fists! he wants those split knuckles! he very often starts fights, and even more often finishes them - what he lacks in raw power he makes up for in vicious tenacity. he just Keeps On Going! he seconds as the group's Knowledge Guy. while his hobby is studying insects, he also catalogues/studies monsters and enemies and terrain so that the Neighborhood can always be prepared. the only time he stays out of fights is when he's researching or note-taking. he tries to micromanage the battle from afar anyway
Julie is like... put a druid, a fighter, and a barbarian in a blender. she's got a big sword! she's got seemingly endless energy in battle! she can talk to plants, especially flowers! her flora magic is very minor, so it's not like she's making giant roots burst out of the ground and strangle people. but plants can give her information, and if she asks nicely and they feel like it, sometimes they'll help her out. in battle she's a force to be reckoned with! nothing will stop her and her sword! she's usually the second (closely following Frank, with Eddie hot on her heels) Neighbor charging into battle - but she's the one with the stellar war cry! & where Sally and Barnaby tend to the Neighborhood's emotional wellbeing & entertainment, Julie keeps things fresh with Physical Activities during their downtime!
Poppy is a powerful healer! she draws on an individual's energy (often taps into her own as well) to convert it into healing power. it's draining but it's damn good healing! she also takes the role of the Neighborhood's cook (the others still like to help, especially Frank who is essentially her sous-chef) and makes sure they're all healthy. she hangs back during battles, waiting to (and hoping that she doesn't have to) heal a wounded Neighbor. if one of them is badly hit, she forces herself to run into battle and drag them to safety before working on their injury. she has a tiny bit of illusion magic, which she'll cast from afar to assist her Neighbors. she tries not to use it outside of emergencies - it takes a lot of energy, which she tries to conserve just in case.
Howdy has Zero Magic! none! four hands and none of them are magical! however, he's a damn good inventor & a whiz at potion making. he can Use magical items like there's no tomorrow - he just can't wield it himself. he supplies the group with potions, helpful items, all sorts of goodies - given that they can trade for it with anything he'd accept in-canon. the only exception is when they're mid-battle - he hands stuff out when needed without haggle. he supplies the group with their cash when they're not getting it from looting/quests - he has a magic backpack that can unfold into a fully-stocked merchant stall! he sells at towns, on the road, anywhere he can! In battle he hangs back with Poppy and, yes, supplies items, but he also uses ranged attacks - magical weapons that cast for him, magic 'bombs', that sort of thing! but there's a little secret - he's the Neighborhood's secret weapon. he invented fantasy guns! four magic revolvers that, when the 'second safety' is turned off, multiply into a giant clusterfuck of guns (with ammo ranging from magic 'bullets' to essentially rocket launchers). unfortunately he can only use this setting once & for a limited time before the guns overload & have to be manually repaired. so he either uses them off of the first safety (i.e, they're 'normal'), or not at all. you know shit is Really hitting the fan when he joins a fight
and Wally! Wally Wally Wally... you may have noticed that i put his class 'wizard' in quotes. that's because he says he's a wizard, but he's not! he just says he's one due to the automatic stigma and fear of what he really is - a Warlock! his patron is Home, an eldritch horror that many would classify as a demon. they have a very special, codependent pact that neither of them can live without - Wally wears their 'seal' as a house-shaped pendant on a choker (necklace) hidden under his clothes. Home is extraordinarily powerful, but Wally barely taps into that power. he has a grimoire that Home inscribed with a bunch of sigils that convert into spells when drawn & then cast in the air. the only other powers he uses are seeing-in-the-dark, seeing-magic, and opening teleportation doors! Wally can't sleep, but he can doze - though he's never fully unaware of his surroundings (its kind of like how dolphins only sleep with one half of their brain). he still eats with his eyes, which both feeds him & acts as a form of providing daily energy to Home, since Home can't exactly consume souls every day. If Wally uses too much magic, he has to rest inside of Home's house-form, which is the only time he actually fully sleeps. no one knows about Home, or that Wally is lying about his wizard status.
Home is a lovecraftian being with three forms. the first is the lowest power level - a cute one-room house with Eyes! i.e: Home Classic! Wally's pendant unfolds into it, and it's the main way Wally and Home physically interact & communicate. the second is possession - if Wally explicitly allows it, Home can completely take over his body and kind of 'tuck him away' to have a nice deep nap while Home takes the reins (Home can technically force this, but it's very difficult and would not go over well w/ Wally - it would also be an unstable possession). the third is Home's true form - a massive shadowy eldritch monster made of writhing darkness and nightmares that no one in their right mind would look at, let alone fight. Home has very complicated feelings about Wally & the Neighborhood. they are also, quite literally, Wally's heart - which is part of their pact.
i have some scene ideas & little Plot Concepts (most notably the times the Neighborhood learns two Very Big Secrets about Wally, one of which being the warlock/Home reveal).
but yeah that's moooostly it. basic stuff yk, not very in depth! just fun things to feed my maladaptive daydreaming & escapism
#warlock-masquerading-as-a-wizard wally is fun#cause youve got this funny little guy! in his little wizard outfit and his staff and classic wizard eccentricities!#but he has a lovecraftian horror curled up in his chest excited for its next opportunity to consume souls#home when making wally's body: ah fuck how do people eat again??? with their eyes right??? that sounds right... thats how i eat...#home a week later: shitshitshit their MOUTHS they eat with this Mouths goddamn it.... too late to fix it now#cut to wally internally panicking while watching other people drink/eat normally#hm i Realized that like... half the Neighborhood more often than not doesn't outright fight#poppy hangs back. howdy hangs back. barnaby rarely joins. frank is often busy researching#and then you've got eddie & julie going full-tilt nonstop absolutely mowing down enemies like there's no tomorrow. sword besties <3#wally and Sally casting from the middle ground...#wh fantasy au#maybe the howdy enthusiast in me is jumping out lately but hes soooo good in this au i swear#he's out here bargaining over a potion with his own neighbor mid-battle#bc he Will be funny about it when the stakes aren't high#forcing them to go through transactions even though he'd give the goods to em anyway#him vibing with poppy & barnaby while explosions go off in the background#and then when shit hits the fan he gets to be a Certified Badass and whips out the big guns with the cockiest grin you've ever seen#hes fun. i love him.#they're all fun. i love them.#home & wally make me especially Ough in this au. their relationship is so messy and you literally cannot have one without the other
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I love that they bring out the noise boys to bookend a season and remind everyone why it the concept was deemed hysterially funny enough to get a spinoff. brennan wasn't lying when he said the energy in the studio was crackling, it was just top to bottom a really good episode, and one that could have only been so almost abstract at times because these guys have done this so many times together
#make some noise#every prompt was a goddamn joy and the ones that weren't graduated into something unexpectedly funny#they're just really good comedians ok#perfect at knowing how far to take something and be creative#even when a bit doesn't end neatly or just kind of fizzles out it's still so fun!!!
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Fun fact! You could still get tickets to see Käärijä, Kuumaa, Erika Vikman X Benjamin, and Bess shows at Allas Sea Pool this summer!
Other fun fact! What the fuck do you mean Erika Vikman And Benjamin coheadliner show back to back with Käärijä? How is anyone supposed to survive both or choose just one? And how is Kuumaa the only one out of these that has sold out a show and gotten an additional date, when they had 2 to start out with and the most expensive tickets out of this group?
#käärijä#erika vikman#benjamin peltonen#bess#essi launimo#kuumaa#unless you're under 18 in which case either bess or just that one Kuumaa show out of the 3 they have lined back to back#I would be spending all my nonexistent money on concert tickets right about now if I could. But nope. fuckkkkk#also Kuumaa getting that bag goddamn#they're not the most expensive act there this summer but they do cost nearly double the cheapest allas sea pool tickets#which makes sense cause they do sell out stadiums and arena tours right now so yeah. good for them honestly.#also I still find the name allas sea pool funny. pool sea pool. it sure is a pool. why is is also a concert venue huh?
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okay so uhhh. definitely wasn't expecting this any time soon. or ever. but unless my tumblr has been lying to me for 3 days straight then i guess it happened.
uhhhhh. thanks for 700 followers bros 👁👁💧
like. i didn't even see my tumblr get to 400. unless i've been hallucinating that it's been at 300 for the last month. am i going insane? maybe. but uhhh. that's a lot of people looking at me. kinda freaking me out a little. but thanks regardless i guys, it does mean a lot to me ✨❤❤❤✨
anyways. i die. nervous. some various rambling under the cut and in the tags but here's an artistic rendition of how i feel right now. enjoy.
so yeah. i don't know how the hell my follower count has doubled in like, two months. maybe it's the Fake Peppino Hugs? a lot of people have been wanting hugs after all. it uhhhh kinda makes me feel weird knowing there's this many of you. but i'll try to manage.
speaking of hugs, yes i've seen the new asks and requests in my inbox i promise!! i will get to them when i can, but for now i'm gonna try to focus on getting a couple other big important things done. mainly, a large Fake Peppino headcanon-related post i've been planning, and getting a few more characters up on Artfight before July.
and also.... i might be getting commissions up soon too?? i don't know how soon, but it'd be a way for me to get income right now since i don't have a job. or, if you don't wanna commission me but still wanna show support, i have a link to me Ko-Fi on my intro post as well! really any support is welcome, but i'm trying to figure out how to do commissions and pricing and stuff since it'll be the first time i *officially* do them. i hope you'll think about it though!!
but yeah, i've got a good few things i've gotta get done with, i'm trying to take things a liiiiittle slow right now though so i don't burn myself out fully. i will try to get stuff done soon though! expect that big Fakey post in maybe a week or so, and i'll update you all on other things that happen as well!
thanks for reading if you have, love ya's ❤❤💗💗💗❤❤
#Local Weirdo wondering how the fuck this many people have decided they like his art of Frogs and Cats.#but ye. i will be a little slow responding to asks for the next while but. i will get to them eventually i promise!!!#i just really wanna get some of the stuff i've been wanting to do for a while done#there is only so many Hugs one man can draw at a time but goddamn will i try to draw them when i can!!#uhhh. feels weird though. like i still don't feel like that number's real but. how would it not be?? unless tumblr glitched real weird#i am glad you all like my Frogs though i guess?? i also enjoy this funny frog as well so i mean i can't judge 👀💧#i am. excited to share my headcanons soon though. and nervous. they're. kinda weird. but fuck it. we're all weirdos here.#you gotta be kinda weird to be a Fake Peppino fan i think. it's the law.#my art#pizza tower fake peppino#okay anyways. i die now. goodbye. ✨
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today's keiji is: absolute misery
#it's always so goddamn funny to me whenever nankidai draws keiji like this. he doesn't do it often but i wish he would i'm obsessed#he's so fucked up.........#your turn to die#yttd#keiji shinogi#sara chidouin#alice yabusame#if you're wondering why they all look so distressed here it's because they're all standing on one tatami mat.#they're so squished..... get them OUTTA there#daily keiji
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Scrimbly Jacqueline 29/52: adult supervision does NOT go according to plan...
✨🧪🔥😴💚🧡✨
"Right. Okay. So. Let me get this straight." Jacqueline took a brief, long deep breath in. "You think you've finally managed to perfect your sleeping elixir and Ken's going to test it for you."
"Yep."
"That about sums it up, yes."
"And you decided it'd be best to have an adult on hand, despite both of you being adults."
"I mean...is nineteen hundred really adulty?"
"YES."
"I dunno, Jacqueline. I don't feel very adulty. Ken's way more mature than me."
"Not nearly as such."
"You're too hard on yourself, dude! You're super mature."
Ken blushed. "Oh! Well. Thank you, Fino."
Fino grinned. "Of course!"
"Right. Okay. So you both decided an adult would be wise, despite being mature," she enunciated the T, her voice popping up an octave. "but are still going through with this despite, y'know, all the red flags."
"Yep!"
"Correct."
"And you can't like, test it on like, a mote, because?"
"Motes have a very different physiology from magibeans, Jacqueline."
"And it already works on them! So Ken said he'd give it a try!"
"Us orcs have very high constitution, after all."
"It's true! I've seen him nearly poison himself four times this week alone and seventy-five percent of the time he had zero side effects! Didn't even know he'd ingested poison! The worst thing that happened was a gnarly case of diarr—"
"We don't need to give your sister all the details."
"He's just being a supportive partner!"
"I know how much it means to you to master all facets of magic. I can make sacrifices."
"Right. So. Why me? Why not Mom or Dad? Jack? Lucy?! I mean, she's a MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, Fino."
"Yeah, and would probably tell us to not do this."
"Debatable. Woman loves her science. She'd MAYBE protest in case, you know, the side effect to sleeping potion is DEATH. But she'd probably stay on site and be able to, y'know, HEAL you BOTH if anything untoward happened."
Fino squinted. "You turn more into mom every day."
"I can't tell if that's an insult or a compliment."
"Just an observation."
"Compliment," Ken clarified.
"Right. Okay. So you decided, quite idiotically, that Lucy was a no. Mom and Dad?"
"Didn't want them to worry!"
"Jack?!"
"Didn't feel right!"
"So you settled on me."
"Yeah! I dunno, I guess I just thought, y'know, out of all the more adulty adults in my life that aren't Ken—"
"We're the same age, Fino."
"Yeah, but maturity! Anyway, the niblets do crazier things—"
"—goddess above, don't remind me."
"So I figured that for something like this, you'd be ideal! You've got the experience, Jacqueline. So? What do you say?"
Fino grinned. His eyes got very, very big and for a brief moment Jacqueline was reminded of when he was much littler and asking for her to pretty please keep the cat, he really likes your room—
She sighed. Rubbed a spot on her temple. "Okay. Fine. But I do NOT approve."
"Don't even worry about it, Jacqueline!"
"There's a very good chance it doesn't work on magibeans yet, after all. Potions and witchcraft aren't Fino's strong suit."
"A fact you will never let me live down," Fino teased, scooping the sunset reminiscent liquid out of the cauldron and pouring it into an uncorked jar. He swirled it; the pinks and oranges gave way to purples and blues, the mixture sparkling.
"I got the colouration right! Yes!"
"Hmm. Perhaps I stand corrected. Well, bottoms up, eh Fin?" Ken took the flask from Fino, lifted it into the air, and chugged it in one go. Placing it down on the counter, he swallowed the last droplet, smacking his lips. "Tastes like gobstoppers."
"Unexpected but delightful result! And how are you feeling?"
Ken licked his lips. "Fine for the most part, though my tusks are a little bit tingly—" his eyes snapped shut and he fell down, face hitting the corner of the island as he plummeted to the floor and landed on his knees, tilting forward until his chin landed on the dirt floor, arms alongside him, ass in the air.
Jacqueline gasped, gently stepping back. Fino lifted the flask. He flushed, looked down at his partner, then up at Jacqueline through the empty vial. He chuckled, embarrassed, and scratched the back of his neck, his fiery locks warm on his skin.
"So, uh. Heh. I guess it worked?"
Ken began to snore.
"Yeah! Maybe a little too well!"
Ken snored louder, the dishes in the sink behind them rattling gently.
"That's probably not a comfortable sleeping position."
"Not unless you're like, five."
"I have a levitation spell for this—"
"Absolutely not! I think he's had MORE than enough magic for the day. I'm calling Donnie. She can lift him easy."
Fino placed the flask down and cleared his throat. "Good call."
✨🧪🔥😴💚🧡✨
hehehe huehuehue hahaha. Meet orc friend! And 1900 year old ish Fino, FULLY REALIZED! And the RETURN of MILF JACQUELINE. FEATURING STOCKING GARTERS. She's only getting Milfier, guys.
Anyway I love Orc Friend (Kenothy, aka, Ken,) sooo much you guys. You don't even KNOW. Today I decided he has the most luscious, wavy, L'Oreal shampoo commercial hair. One day I'll draw him in cleaned UP scrimbly format! But for now, BEHOLD! A BUTT.
Design Notes:
I really did give Fino a goddamn mullet. He's working it.
He alternates between vest and no vest. Since he's at home practising potions, it's a no vest day. This is deffs NOT code for "I forgot he wears a lil vest sometimes. a lil waistcoat, if you will"
Milfline's bun is poofier because it is closer to the end of the day. That thing is five seconds from pulling a Mrs. Claus up-do explosion, and Ken being KO'd by a sleeping potion certainly doesn't help!
K and I were talking about garters and stays and such today and adding them to Jacqueline's fit hit me so hard my desk chair wheeled back on me! More on this next week.
I got a really cool pair of boots in Dreamlight Valley and if I don't adapt them to Milfline I may die about it, more on that next week too!
I RIPPED the PAPER bc I originally had Ken drawn like. Across the page? But I was picturing him butt in the air the way kids pass out. I got home from work, looked at it, and went no wait. this is how it should be doodled, and voila! Orc Friend Butt
Orc Friend Deets, if you're curiouse :3 (under the read more)
Post Colouring Thoughts:
I forgot how. In theory. Fino's patterned dress shirts and rainbow lined cloak are cool as FUCK. But in PRACTISE. Make him look like a bowling alley carpet.
You know what tho? It matches the mullet >:)
Which I am wildly proud of tbh!
Decided that orc friend DOES dress fancy! hence the (matching) green coat with golden buttons >:3
His hair is SO luscious and I put the gold in just to see the lines bc after I coloured it it didn't really show, but now I'm like. idk! I kinda like it!
His right hand got eaten? I sketched it. And now it is gone. I think it's under all that hair.
He also has a BUTT TON of earrings, ya girl just got sleeby and forgot to add them in! But he has like. 5 on each ear and one of the earrings is two studs linked by a chain bc it's NEAT
Maybe I'll do like a proper scrimble of him! I really like Orc Friend you guys :3
#dani speaks#scrimbly jacquelines#fino#orc friend#jacqueline frost#fino frost#smile shots#dani writes#dani doodles#crystal springs#cs posting#guys i love kenothy and fino so fucking much it's not even funny#they are aro ace life partners and i would DIE FOR THEM#they're so fun and ken is just so calm and cool and collected#and down to clown at any given time see: him happily testing a sleeping potion#he has a gr8 night's rest. Dite carrying him to bed doesn't even wake him#in the morning he wakes up well rested#and fino already has a nice cup of his preferred blend of tea waiting#ken doesn't say anything. takes a seat at the island. sips the tea. enjoys it for a moment. adjusts his specs#clears his throat#it was perfect but too strong#yeah. says fino. i thought as much. but we're getting there!#can i treat you to breaki please i feel bad about you passing out#and he agrees and off they go#jacquie lectures fino. so does dite who is slaying in her donnie era#later he gets a text from lucy like BRUH#it is one word but he understands#and as for fiera? she thinks it's all goddamn hilarious and has volunteered to be the next tester#Ken does not like this. she is so small fino he says. your potions may kill her#Fino leans in and is like 'i actually think it is physically impossible for fiera to die'
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you ever have a fic get you in such a chokehold you start pacing your room and talking to yourself
#THIS FIC WAS WRITTEN FOR ME SPECIFICALLY#BURN IT ALL DOWN BY DOROTHYCANFLY ON AO3 THIS IS GENUINELY ONE OF MY TOP 5 FICS OF ALL TIME EVER#IT'S GOT THE BEST DABI CHARACTERISATION IVE EVER COME ACROSS IT'S GOT REALLY WELL WRITTEN DABIHAWKS#THAT FITS BOTH OF THEM LIKE THEY'RE MEAN AS HELL ABOUT IT AT FIRST#IT'S GOT STUPIDLY DEVOTED TOUYA-SHOUTO IT'S GOT PROTECTIVE BIG BROTHER TOUYA#IT'S GOT MENTAL ANGST WRITTEN LIKE A DREAM THE WRITING IN GENERAL IS INSANE#IT'S ACTION PACKED BUT DONE WELL SO THAT IT'S NOT TEDIOUS IT'S FUNNY IT'S GOT TWISTS#IT'S KEEPING ME ON MY TOES I NEVER KNOW WHAT'S COMING OR HOW FAR THE AUTHOR IS WILLING TO GO#IVE LITERALLY READ 300K WORDS IN TWO DAYS AT THIS POINT LIKE I AM ABSOLUTELY FINISHING THIS TONIGHT#WHAT THE FUCK EVEN AM I GONNA DO WITH MYSELF AFTER THIS#EVERY NEW THING THAT HAPPENS LITERALLY HAS ME GETTING UP TO PACE ABOUT#I CLOCKED OUT OF MY MUM TELLING ME OFF EARLIER BC I WAS THINKING ABOUT THIS FIC#DO U KNOW HOW DANGEROUS THAT IS BASO JUST SIGNED MY DEATH WARRANT BUT I DIDNT CARE#losing my goddamn mind respectfully <3 if anyone has read this pls yell with me about it#and if anyone knows mha and wants a fic rec PLEASE let it be this one it's my fav mha fic ever and ive read A LOT#it gets quite smutty in the middle but if that's not ur thing the author tws very well and u can kinda just scroll#so that u still get the important character developments without it being just pure smut lol#god this FIC. holding it in my fucking fist and squeezing the everloving life out of it im going INSANE#i cant remember the last time a fic got me this way im literally giggling about it all#HE FOUND A REASON TO LIVE AGAIN THEY TOOK THIS MANGLED BLOODY BOY AND SAID WE LOVE YOU#YOU ARE GOOD YOU CAN STAY YOU CAN REST NOW WE'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU AND HE CHOSE THEM! HE CHOSE THEM!#OVER HIS REVENGE AND HIS RAGE HE CHOSE THEM! IM GOING TO BE VIOLENTLY SICK#like the author LETS DABI BE A CUNT. the first chunk of the fic he's actively not a good person#and his coping mechanisms are shot to shit and we WATCH HIM GROW FROM THAT i have cried several times over the most mundane shit#goddddddddDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAKSJFJKAGSFIUAHGJKAKG#mha#fic rec
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Every time I see someone use my caps or memes or anything else to illustrate something or even just to admire, I melt into the happiest puddle~
#i'm so glad they're being used#i saw like five of them in different uses today and it made me feel very pleased#like god why was this cast so beautiful what was the reason#why are they so goddamn funny and why is the show so fucking good#i am flat on the floor and recovering now#my ramblings
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