#they still live in my brain truly
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Tumblr was attacked by a cross-site scripting worm deployed by the Internet troll group GNAA on Dec 3, 2012.
Text
here’s another bonus more serious jesstra edit I made a bit ago as super apology to all you wonderful tumblr people who stuck around !!!!! even though I Dipped off the face of the earth after Halloween LMFAOO
#I’ll be back from my slumber in due time I promise#(when I get over the hurdle of hating my artsyle atm LMFAOD)#they still live in my brain truly#minecraft story mode#mcsm#minecraft#mcsm petra#petra mcsm#jesse mcsm#mcsm jesse#mcsm f!jesse#mcsm jesstra#jesstra#mcsm edit
65 notes
·
View notes
Text
KILL!!!!!!!!!
#my post#this is so mean. why did i make this#but also....... the gun is in your hands now#i'll admit that it's my fault for putting the gun in your hand... however i've no say in what you choose to do with it#will you pull the trigger and accept whatever happens from now on? will you give yourself into the role forced upon you?#no one will know anything if you don't say anything. there will be no consequences or repercussions to this choice#but you will know. and you will need to live with that knowledge for the rest of your life#a gun not fired is like an itch not stratched#in the end i have no control over what you do... but free will is a funny thing#the brain is very susceptible to suggestion... everything we see and experience will remain with us in some way#if that's the case then how much control do we really have in our lives? how do we separate what we really want vs what we're told to want?#things like hunger... desire... they're all things the body asks for. but are they things that we truly want?#or are they merely a mechanism built into us for the sake of survival?#everything blends into everything. your past actions will inform your current actions. you're the only one who's ever lived your life#you're the only one who will ever live your life#little variables and experiences we all share... but the order varies greatly from person to person. everything is just a series of events#the way i see the world is different than the way you see it regardless of how similar they are#what choice will you make now? and how does it differ from the choice you would've made a week ago? a month? a year? does it differ at all?#does free will truly exist? i think it does... but not in the way most people think it exists#you and i... we might differ on that thought. or we might not.#regardless of whatever i've been rambling about right now... refusing to make a choice is still a choice you make. life is ironic like that#does one of them really have to go? that's for you to decide now#i've merely chosen to put the gun in your hand. to make you aware of the possibilities#so i hope you realize what power your choices have#dca fandom#daycare attendant#yeah sometimes i just say things that i think are deep but they're really not#i hope the choices i make have an effect on others. even if it's just one person...#if i can make even just one person think about something they wouldn't have normally thought about then isn't that a win?#life is a series of choices... ''it'd be great if you could see a figure of light by the time you die'' ♡
49 notes
·
View notes
Text
Using a salvaged jar of paint and the brush from a nail polish to refurbish the logo on this INCREDIBLE old shirt that I thrifted.
[ID: A green t-shirt with a white wind turbine printed on it. Around the turbine is written, "Renewable energy? I'm a big fan!" End ID.]
#solarpunk#diy#still debating what to do with this#I could wear it as a shirt but I truly never wear colors like this that show sweat.#it would be a GORGEOUS backpatch for my vest#and then the rest of the shirt would be scrap fabric for mending#or possibly part of the Scrap Hodgepodge Shorts that live in my brain
118 notes
·
View notes
Text
the boy-but-not-that-way-ism of riz gukgak send tweet
#not art#have been chipping away at a more... proper? so to say. piece of the kids for keepsake. and since its of them at the beach Im rotating#gender stuff in brain again. riz and gorgug ping a lot of the like funny gender stuff in my brain#very specifically adjacent to cultural understanding of it all... like I did say I do think riz has a gender and it can be#translated to ''man'' in solesian understanding but also that boy has close to no self awareness nor does he want to#he grew up as ''goblin'' before ''boy'' and it's kinda how he perceives himself. got a gender but doesn't wanna do much with it#kinda imagining him seeing his grandparents again and realizing that there's a gap there between himself and his grandpa too#and sitting with that for a bit. not for long that kid doesnt do that but for just a little bit#man I truly really do love that riz is aroace. my boy of the unquantifiable unimportant margins....#gorgug though is 100% trans lmao. there's a kinda distance to his own body in how he acts#that's kinda common in ''mad scientist'' characters? (or maybe my perspective's just skewed due to willow jenkins lmao)#kid spent the first two seasons fitting himself in places he Should be able to fit. and s3 is pretty much all about him Making New Spaces#thing is despite looking ardently for like. the reason Why he can't fit in in the first season I think gorgug really does#love his gnome parents and love being their child. and its confusing and tough to have to learn why something you love still hurts you#he wants it to not. he wants to make sense. and then it does and it changes nothing really#until he actively makes choices based on what he's learned. like. damn idk how to word it but#just like the ability to say ''actually this Is my life what are u gonna do? stop me from living it?'' is a powerful force#its rly fun to look at these two guys in these contexts thats like#they will never win the gender game just by virtue of being who they are. it's not designed for folks like them to win#but riz would simply not play and gorgug would design his Own game he's the champion of. and I think that rules
29 notes
·
View notes
Note
“because he never accepts that it's never been about righteousness--it's about repentance.” except javert killing himself IS repentance.
well, it’s like 12 different things, because bro had gone days without sleeping and very little food and water and he already had low self-worth and kept asking the amis to kill him and just assumed he was going to die AND THEN valjean upended his understanding of the world and morality. he was really going through it & there are a lot of overlapping reasons for why he jumps into the seine.
but javert is like Number One Most Responsible guy in the whole story. taking responsibility is his Thing (forever bitter the musical doesn’t include the punish me monsieur le maire scene). how else, in his derailment, could he atone for his conceived misdeeds other than by handing in his resignation to god? in the brick he had already left a note urging his superiors to treat convicts at toulon better, which is another step in his repentance (and another crime the musical commits by not including it). jumping into the seine was another step.
honestly a lot of ppl who like the book think the musical was dead wrong to exclude him from the big heaven group sing, because it COMPLETELY undermines the themes of forgiveness and compassion threaded throughout les mis. like the musical was simply wrong lol.
This is helpful context! I am still finishing the brick, although I have fully read the abridged version, and that detail about the letter wasn't included, so I didn't know that occurred! (And thank you for the message--this is a long response but I'd love to hear more of your thoughts!)
I agree that Javert is certainly deeply distraught and remorseful; like you mentioned, his worldview is literally falling apart, and his actions reflect his mental state. But his death isn't really repentance--in the sense that it's not what God would have wanted. To me it reads like a Judas situation: a desperate realization of a huge mistake, and doing the only thing you think can make it right, namely, ending it all. That's the just punishment for someone so wrong, isn't it?
But true repentance, meaning the repentance that the Lord desires, is about changing your ways, not "paying a price." Had Javert really understood the beauty of Valjean's mercy (an image of Christ's, just as the bishop's undeserved mercy was to Valjean himself), rather than killing himself, he would have lived to also become "an honest man"--in heart. One who could forgive and understand forgiveness, for himself as well as others. One who could recognize that he is not The Law, that he can fall, but that he can also be "brought to the light." One who could accept that men like Valjean, and men like himself, CAN change, and be changed.
It's tragic to me because so much of "Stars," and his character in the book as well as the musical, is about wanting to be righteous, to rise above his birth and the sinfulness he associates it with. It's about wanting to please the Lord by his actions. But in his end, he shows he never understood what God really wanted from him, and that's where my original phrase comes in: not righteousness, but repentance. To live, and face the man you were, knowing it's no longer the man you are. That it's never been about what you've done or can do, but about what's been done for you. That's the Gospel that he could never fully accept.
To use another example you mentioned, that misunderstanding drives why he asks the Mayor (Valjean) to punish him--in his worldview, mercy is unjust, or at the very least, unfair. Evil must be punished; "those who fall like Lucifer fell" receive "the sword." But "as it is written," God "desires mercy, not sacrifice" (Matthew 9:13). God would have wanted Javert to live, and Javert couldn't see that, and that's why it's devastating to me. In his misunderstanding of the heart of God, he misses what would have set him free from the chains of sin he's always been trying to escape.
That's why he's contrasted with Valjean, who (though he carries guilt about his past till the end of his life) is eventually able to face it and confess what he had done to those he loves. He knew there was mercy to be found, if only it was asked for. Javert was too blinded by pride and shame to realize it, and so, while broken, he never was able to truly repent.
For that, you must go on.
#i have a lot more thoughts on this specifically as it relates to pride as javert's fatal flaw. that's what kept him from grasping it all#because fundamentally he believes what he does is what sets him apart as righteous. that's the symbolism of the brand: your deeds define you#so if it's actually been about mercy all along then he has been needlessly cruel when he thought it was righteousness#and all of his actions that he thought made him better have been for nothing. he's carried shame for nothing. been a slave for nothing#les miserables#les mis#inspector javert#responses aka the ramblings of my brain#my meta posts#meta#kay can i just catch my breath for a second#no actually i'm still not done just needed to interrupt for the search tags etc.#shame is only possible where pride is present#that's my hot take. if javert had been truly totally humble he would not have killed himself. he would have accepted the gift of life#which is the same gift we are given in christ!! and that's honestly why it isn't repentance because the whole thing is a christian allegory#his suicide shows that he still regards himself as judge. he determines the punishment#and in his song the lyrics are full of things like 'damned if i'll live in the debt of a thief' 'i'll spit his pity right back in his face'#he is too prideful to accept the gift that christ has given: salvation UTTERLY unearned and undeserved. through grace alone#narratively he represents the Law (old covenant) in christianity and those who still choose to live under it#romans 3:20 says 'therefore by the deeds of the law shall no flesh be justified in His sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin'#but valjean represents one saved by the new covenant. who can see that his 'righteousness is as filthy rags' (isaiah 64:6) and is redeemed#and that is why ultimately from a narrative perspective valjean has salvation and javert does not#not that javert did not see his wrongdoing but that he could not look past his own 'righteousness'#anyway this was all very christian-info-dump but the book is too so i feel it was justified 😂 but that's my interpretation#would love to hear more thoughts if you have them!! i truly hope this didn't come off as combative bc i mean it super genuinely!#kay has a party in the tags#kay is a musical theater nerd#kay is a classical literature nerd
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
...because any moment may be our last. everything is more beautiful because we're doomed.
#looking through my drafts and seeing this post unfinished and knowing in my core I'll probably never actually finish it .#but strangley enough i don't hate the way it looks with only those 2 panels ? beauty in simplicity or something idk#woe unfinished post be upon ye#honestly probably wouldnt even bother posting it were it not for the fact i was hit by a sudden wave of sadness#by being reminded out of the blue that alex really does just . lose nigel that night#enough deep level analysis my brain is all out i think . but just the simple fact that nigel dies that night#and alex has to go on for the rest of his life post-ending carrying that grief and loss with him#i know we talk about how nigel isn't truly 'gone' in the sense that they're one now and jack is supposed to be an amalgamation of the two#a product of their union and 'consummation' that night at the yard#but he's still gone . no matter how much alex might try and follow in nigel's footsteps#no matter how hard alex tries to tread that same path nigel did to feel close to him#he's gone . they will never have that moment beneath the house ever again . and alex has to go on living with that#anyway . normal again . imagine dropping a song rec like i used to. aha . go listen to sick like me by in this moment.#like minds#murderous intent#nigel colbie#alex forbes#nigel colbie x alex forbes#edit : THEY'LL NEVER HAVE THE MOMENT UNDER THE HOUSE AGAIN !!!!!#thinking about the moment where nigel sits across from alex after he shoots john#and the contrast to the scene in the crawlspace . nigel is trying to connect he is trying to get alex to see to understand#but now alex is closed off. something may be irreparable broken between them#do you think it was the moment where nigel starts to despair . to plead . realise that he needs to find a way to make alex truly see#i need to get some sleep
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
Those replies just made me remember this:
youtube
Anxiety really thinks we live in a world that works this way lmao
———————
i really enjoy that you could have just submitted the normal john mulaney delta airlines bit but you instead went out of your way to send me an sdr2 version. thank you
#submission#Youtube#windcarvedlyre#also YEAH anxiety brain truly does believe the world works like this#if i go to the pharmacy and ask for the medication that i need to live they’ll.hate me forever#and when i go get my vaccinations there and i have to ask for a special pneumonia vaccine#bc i’m immunosuppressed#they will call me a lying liar who lies to try to get extra vaccine#and when i show them the name of the vaccine that my rheumatologist wrote in my last report#so that i would be able to know exactly what to ask for (bc she’s chill like that)#they will say i made it up. and they will ban me from pharmacy forever. and then what#ignore that my entire family has been using this pharmacy for years with very little issue#(save for my father but that was more a failure of the us medical system than that pharmacy. hooray opiates)#ignore that i’ve been getting my vaccinations at that pharmacy for years with no issues#that’s… unimportant. don’t matter . bc The World Is Out To Get Me You See#god i’m still really impressed with how well that coping strategy works. turn ur doomspirals into an improv game. free comedy#AND it makes you feel better
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
finished the show!! 10/10, better than I expected, yum! definitely wanna draw something about that, but it seems polite to tag spoilers - so blacklist b7spoiler if you're in the shoes of me an hour ago xD
#blakes 7#b7spoiler#spoilers ensue here too#god what a tasty gut stabbing#my brain is already racing making blake-anna parallels#avon shot her too on instinct on the first thought of betrayal#and then the suiside??? the episode was made for me personally#from the spoilers i assumed that blake truly was the betrayer who was working with federation#but learning that he still was with them? that is so ironic i lovvvve it#also can't not make the parallel with rorschach begging for death when he realized all was lost#also also i'm thinking that this time avon didn't rush to blake as soon as he learned where he was was because he just couldn'r re-live#the lost hope again......#also also also i'm assuming that orac was looking for clues allllll the time they were separated so avon was hoping against all odds#that it will find something#just waiting and hoping and telling himself that there's no chance and still hoping and hating himself for it and still hoping....#and then shooting the hope himself!!!!!!
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Even if the sky cracks in mourning / And the heavens just won't open up for me" A Series of Small Offerings - II/12 - day20
#a series of small offerings#sleep token fanart#elaboration on this piece further down in the tags because this one may confuse people i think#(also please note that i firmly believe that the from the room below version of this song is the superior one)#(so the art was made with that version in mind because that is the version that lives rent free in my brain for reasons)#i've been thinking so much how to approach this one.. i knew pretty much since i've made the challenge that i will go with this line#specifically because i refuse to hear it as the lyrics sites and spotify tells me to hear it (as it appears in the post) but instead#i don't hear the 'the' in any version of the song i'm sorry that is just not there#so i'm convinced it is 'as the sky cracks in mourning'#(sky cracking-lightning;sky mourning-rain)#which is also exactly how the song feels to me#being a sad wet cat of a person standing bare feet in a strom and just crying 'why i was i so blind to my own hubris'#specifically in relation of finally (and far too late) understanding you fucked up a relationship so bad it still hurts years after#if you've ever felt anything remotely similar you know what i'm talking about#and you get why i refuse it being 'in the morning' instead of 'in mourning'#vessel i#vessel#vessel sleep token#vessel fanart#sleep token band#sleeptoken#levynn tries to draw#sleep token#edit: i don't mean to offend those who stand behind the line being 'in the morning' btw i just don't hear it#and i don't think i'm correct. i'm correct for me. not in your stead. half the lyrics can be heard at least two ways#edit2: appearently i'm actually right about something for a change.. a truly unusual turn of events#see comments for referrence pls#also edited this post to the correct lyrics#but leaving the tags for context 'cause thw original version of the post has been rb-d before editing i think
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
impaled
#nathan being impaled on that tetanus inducing loose steel pipe. tho tetanus is the least of his worries on account of. well u know 🕳#nathan can be a body horror fans best friend if u let him into ur heart. living human crash dummy#i really cant believe he gets impaled. twice.#hole moment!#love turning nathans immortality round in my head. but healing factor....?#thinkin today about how the video game guy tim threatens to cut one of them in half with a chainsaw and simon is like:#[😐nathan u obviously have to volunteer]#but what woulda actually happened if that followed through [probably why it didnt lol]#would the others have had to drag each severed bit of him back to the community centre and let his guts re fuse#fucking hold him together with gaffer tape and plasters. cause i doubt he coulda regrown a whole half#his 'healing factor' only comes into play when he dies. fresh canvas etch a sketch reboot and all that. hes not fuckin wolverine#all the deaths r: impaled on fence. impaled on pipe. beaten to death. blows his own brains out. falls and snaps his neck#but chainsaw... ? one can ponder. fingers to head i can imagine anything image#readin his wiki rn 'his body will never get sick. rot. age. or truly grow old'#may not get sick but he can still shit his guts out. hashtag oblivious lactose intolerant king hashtag milk drinker#forever the worlds most annoying twenty yr old#and then the wiki goes 'the user does not need to eat drink or breathe' ....hello#ive rotated him not aging any further cause it lines up with the whole stuck in his ways. never changing [kelly voice: its just who u are]#but eatin and drinking and breathing??? we know he still experiences hunger [<-kebab]#and he dunks his head in a bucket of water when hes testin for powers with simon. gaspin for air afterwards right#firm believer in the. he suffocated to death several times in the coffin before they dug him up#oh waaait. is it stating this like. he doesnt need foodwaterair. cause it doesnt matter if he dies.. ohhhhhh..... Oh..😃#staring at nathan sleeping in the community centre surviving on bags of crisps from the vendies so hard i burn holes through my monitor#this got away from me. uh. living crash dummy. oil pastel guts and water colour jumpsuit yessir#having fun doin art. expect more hole art. sorryfor putting this in the misfits tag hehe. not really#gore#blood#misfits#my art#chewtoy
51 notes
·
View notes
Text
so what that i slept in for the exam. my voice teacher just called to talk about yesterdays concert and said some truly insane shit that made me cry again (but like. in a good way lol) so who even gives a shit lol
#she can singlehandedly fix me#she said so many insanely beautiful things. about ME. i am still reeling from it.#also she said we 'clearly have the exact same vision when it comes to this aria' and im sooooo normal about it uwu#yes queen ill be your little bitch ill sing it exactly as you want it (except i WILL use chest voice sorry thats not optional)#anyway i hate this because see this is what my brain does now. i got so many insane compliments that now all i can think about is#“when will i lose it”. now im gonna live in fear that one day ill wake up and ill forget how to act.#that i will suddenly just lose all my idk stage presence and all my musicality. because i just cant have nice things#and i cant have things to actually be. if not exactly proud of. then at least happy about. im not allowed.#the moment i let myself believe it and truly appreciate and value myself and consider myself objectively good at something - ill lose it all#or rather - it shall be taken away from me to teach me a lesson. see for a person who doesnt believe in god#i sure do live in a constant conviction that he's just waiting for the opportune moment to lure me into a fake sense of safety and happiness#just to snatch it away at the peak of it if only to prove to me that i dont get to have nice things and i shouldnt dare to even want them#gotta love being normal
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
i fear the 'surely someone's gonna save me' in sunshine baby has an incredible chokehold on me
#this Can't be the energy going into 2025 sighs#sabs speaks#lowkey had like four different meltdowns today over plans being changed and its like. can we be normal#and then my brain had the audacity to be like ur lying.#like girl what the fuck?? in what world are we doing this for fun#and then do u guys know the horror story of like vampire slumbering just have my headphones on genuinely vampire like and out of NOWHERE my#sister is just above me like Hi.#can u fix this dress for me#like in what world do u wake me up like that girl#i fixed the dress but still like. let me live#times like these im considering dropping out truly having that moment over u need to chill out before the stress kills you before the thing#that's supposed to has a chance#if this all seems disconjointed its because it is and is not hope this helps <3#i also want nothing more than to write about my blorbos but i saw people being wrong about them and now im like shit. maybe im wrong about#them#so i cant do it without feeling insane for that reason and for the second reason that i have other obligations#i think it should be illegal for education to give u things to do over the holidays they dont understand how much guilt i will feel not#getting things done and instead feeling horrific and not resting#i also think learning too much about my health has caused me to spiral a lot like the dr's being so chill about it whilst im in debilitatin#pain is not good for me actually. and has triggered the disability grief all over again#having my pmdd and my menstruation at the same time genuinely i felt like female hysteria and im scared for the next one#its a wonder i did Not do It#a little morbid i guess but i have Morbid hormone disorder shrugs#anyways. 2025 be better i hope#so scared to pull my cards for the year#less actually scared and more like. i dont knowww how much i have it in me to be brave anymore#congrats if u made it this far but mostly sorry to my scorpio rising
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
✨️ !!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! ✨️
‼️ I HOPE IT TURNS AROUND TO BE A GOOD ONE AFTER ALL ‼️
You are such a nice mutual to have, especially with a username as great as yours. Bound together by the power of TIT Berlin!
Wishing you many Dan and Phil related and non Dan and Phil related happy days in your new year! Health and prosperity and happiness and security ! And all other nice things one can want and have ! 🎉✨️
awww thank youu <333
im okay now - turns out socialising can actually help you out of a bad mood! who would’ve thought lol
very happy you’re my mutual and yes tit berlin will always be famous <33
#btw I know we met at tit but I’m still not sure I’m connecting you with the right person in my brain#I think so but I’m not sure 🙈#anyway long live dan and phil for bringing me so much joy especially in whatever this crazy last year was#and for making me get to know soo many lovely phannies#you guys are truly the best#sorry for the rambling I’m slightly high off of mulled wine and being around people haha
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
gOSH I can't stop thinking about how cool it is that my friend is seeing Eric perform today....... GETTING TO SEE ALAN AND ERIC WITHIN SIX MONTHS OF ONE ANOTHER.... agGGghghG gotta add her experience to my essay 🙏 certified price-burdon moment!!!!!!!
#the fact that both alan and eric acknowledged and thanked me for my art this year also means a lot to me 🥹🥹🥹#they're both so kind despite everything and you can tell that above all else the music and its impact on people still means the most to the#i am still not over meeting alan either.......that night replays in my head every single day 😭😭💙#i'm afraid i have a counter argument to the phrase 'never meet your heroes'#as long as the hero-worship doesn't get to your head and you consider them flawless human beings#meeting the people who created art that changed your life for the better and seeing them perform live is truly an experience like no other#making plans to meet my 'hero' did wonders for my mental health... didn't cure anything of course because i have a Bad Brain but#having goals seriously makes the day a whole lot easier to tackle#hence why i want to see him again <3#ALAN..... THANK YOU FOR ACCEPTING MY BOOK#ERIC..... THANK YOU FOR BEING SO NICE TO ME AND LIKING MY ART#jOHN TOO!!!!! JOHN LIKES MY ART TOO!!!!!!!#aNIMALS ARE MY FRIENDS.... THEY LIKE ME#aaAAAAA ANIMALS okay i really need a dr pepper#preparing myself for a big animal art post tomorrow#things i said today
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
ik this is my aesthetic sideblog but i just need to be vulnerable and Not On Main for a moment thank u
#i have been seeing someone lately and it is going so well like. truly So Well. and naturally part of me is like 'well why don't we sabotage#that' because 1) obviously i do not deserve good things and 2) i still am So Fucking Hung Up on h. like it has been YEARS the time we dated#is literally a BLIP in the timeline like it does not count. BARELY dated we hooked up ONCE like why does she still have this stupid fucking#control over me still. so much so that i am fully thinking i should call this off bc i cannot date someone when i'm still not over her#again! it has been YEARS!! like as in ten since we dated! eight since we hooked up!! five since we saw each other in person last!!!#and the person i'm seeing is so fucking cute and sweet and i love talking to them and spending time with them and they are also like. So Ho#and also Not my ex best friend!!!!!#i just. h and i live in the same city now. it's not out of the realm of possibility that we run into each other. and i don't know what i'd#do if we did. but i need to accept that facebook friends is all we will ever be and that i will never get the 'closure' i want so bad#trying to make myself believe and accept the last meeting theory but i just. idk#this is stupid i'm a wreck i'm so sorry i will be deleting this later i just need to get it out of my stupid fucking brain
2 notes
·
View notes