#they got a variety of ppl with different stuff on it but

[coderiderr]

Mom bought me a calming app that’s actually working :)

[waywardsalt]

tag rant but man i fuckin hate the new direction for loz

[protectingtulpas]

So I just got sent that pretty iconic "anti-tulpa" document and I think it's pretty damn funny that a lot of those sources, if you actually READ them, are neutral or even supportive lmfao.

Like for this one? This is straight up pro-, and is just explaining that "tulpamancy" isn't the original concept and that it's based on other practices. Congrats, you're making our fucking point for us!

This next one is pretty interesting also. I wanna highlight some stuff from it, from both the op and comments.

Let's talk about my existence in contrast to some of these statements. The first one is "The biggest, most dangerous form of evil in Buddhist thought is "ego" or self-grasping. If ANY mental phenomena increases your self-cherishing attitudes (self importance, grandiosity, jealousness, craving, hatred, self-loathing, self-absorption etc) it's evil. IF a mental phenomena causes greater flexibility, less attachment, more tranquil emotions, less mental chatter/discursive thinking, increased generosity and compassion toward others, higher mental clarity etc.--that's good." And the second one is "If it increases negative emotions, it's not Dharma. If it decreases negative emotions, it's Dharma." So these are great for some people, but that mentality of not allowing "self-cherishing attitudes" can be EXTREMELY HARMFUL FOR SYSTEMS and ANYONE with self worth issues. A lot of this is contradictory for a lot of people. Something can both decrease negative emotions and make you feel connected to yourself. Nobody has the right to make us feel any less like ourselves - normally you can believe whatever you want for yourself, obviously, but pushing it onto other ppls' lives aint cool. The implication that we're straight up DANGEROUS just for existing is insulting to created systems regardless of whether you're using the word tulpa or not.

The reply to that by @/eeveecraft is great, and this part describes how weird that is in the context of headmates' identities here. "Furthermore, really don't like how you downplayed tulpas as property there, buddy. Tulpas are not property, they are people in every sense of the word, and I don't [give a] flying fuck about whatever complications that for your beliefs. My systemmates are people, full stop. I was already able to tell since you refer to your own systemmates as "imaginary friends," which a lot of tulpas aren't okay with being called that because that implies that they're fake. They are NOT lesser because they're not created by ancient monks or whatever.

"Like, seriously: "They would be considered "as real as you and me," with their own likes and dislikes etc," because apparently, modern tulpas don't have likes and dislikes and their hosts just see them as delusions? Say that to my tulpa, Arcanus who adores coffee while the smell makes me nauseous, say that to my systemmates who switch with me and have their own hobbies. Also, tulpas are more than just personalities. They have their own experiences, skills, preferences, dreams, memories, thoughts, a person is more than just their personality, and I thought a "licensed psychotherapist" would know that, especially if they have systemmates of their own." Make sure to read the full comment tho cuz it's a good takedown, it's not just about that it goes thru the entire thing.

SO! If anybody actually wants a well-studied paper outlining everything, check out Tracking the Tulpa: Exploring the "Tibetan" Origins of a Contemporary Paranormal Idea by Natasha L. Mikles and Joseph P. Laycock. It goes into a lot more of an accurate and in-depth history on the subject, and the bibliography ACTUALLY shows where things come from.

All that document showed us was that Buddhists are a wide community with a variety of different people with different skill levels, understandings, and opinions. And that we need to ditch the fantastical, impossible representation of the tulpa in supernatural media because that's ACTIVELY harming people. Which is what we want to show people! So congrats!

[dnpbeats]

I would be interested in a post about their management! I find that stuff interesting but I don’t know much about it

hi!!! firstly sorry it's taken me so long to get to this! 😭 also going to put this under the cut bc it got long lol :3 also this is more about their talent agents, idk if they have a dedicated manager doing what marianne used to do or if her job is now spread between different ppl/agencies

okay, so currently dan, phil, and danandphil are signed with InterTalent which is a talent agency. (dan is also signed w/ united talent agency, im assuming he's signed to two agencies bc UTA based in the US and intertalent is based in the UK? but his contact email on his yt channel goes to intertalent.)

dan's under the comedy division of intertalent which you can see on their website:

bc he's under comedy he's represented by hannah layton who is head of the comedy division. but if you go to her profile, she's assisted by someone named izzy whitaker, so I wouldn't be surprised if she's also worked with dan. and then as you can see on dan's profile his events are handled by olivia bertolotti. so already with just dan there's three ppl dealing with his stuff 😂

phil is signed under the digital creators division:

he's represented by meisha kelly, who according to the website is the head of the sports division so lmao 💀 she only has one other digital creator client besides phil. and then his events are handled by the same person as dan (she's head of events so im assuming she handles a lot of people's events?)

dan and phil together, as dapg, are also signed, under the gaming division:

so dapg is represented by a different person (toby dobson) than dan and phil because they're in the gaming division. also side note im cracking up at the cat pic being the photo of choice for dapg?? 💀

so basically there's just a lot going on since all three d&p entities are in different divisions and therefore have different agents representing them

so on top of all that, there's audiencly which is an "influencer marketing agency," from what I can tell from their website they essentially just hook up content creators with brands for brand deals. they also do influencer management. dan and phil (again, as dapg) are listed as one of their "exclusive creators" so I'm assuming that their services don't overlap w/ intertalent much at all, but regardless they are also signed with audiencly. (also in case anyone is curious, they're listed under "variety" (not gaming))

from what I can see there isn't an extensive list of brands that work with them, so I don't know if all of dan and phil's spons are through them or just some of them. but from their case study page we at least know that socialpoint (aka dragon city) and nordvpn work with them. we also know that evony (the knight game) works with them because the giveaway info is hosted on audiencly's website (this is actually how I found out about audiencly lmao 😭)

also if you care, their business managers/accounts are dales evans & co which you can find from their company information lol. they also do tour financial management which is im assuming why d&p chose them!!

so yeah that's pretty much it, or at least everything I know! :) also bc TIT is happening rn you also have AEG thrown in the mix, which is the tour producer/promoter (but obviously that won't last past the tour)

[weaverpop]

Can I offer a situation?

One of mk's ex's has been harassing him

I would think mk would of apologized to the partners that broke things off cause of how he was acting in the past and for most they forgave him. But there could always be the one who didn't want to forgive or acknowledge his sincere efforts to grow. And then theres of course the ones from relationships where the partner was the problem.

Said ex more maybe two got bitter seeing him happy in a new relationship and with a prince no less, and they start spamming him with abusive messages from a variety of different accounts.

Mk is of course alarmed and pretty distressed but doesn't want to alarm nezha so he does his best to hide it. But it quickly goes from abusive language and attacking his insecurities to straight up threatening to bash him publicly as an abusive partner; sighting his past problematic behavior with some exaggerating details and even straight up making crap up.

It sends mk into an intense depressive episode because he's starting to believe and misremember details. He wants to tell nezha but wants to try to resolve it first and goes to mei first since she's scary good when it comes to find ppl via social media sleuthing skills.

Nezha ends up find out anyway though because the ex got bold and decided to uphold there threat and contacted him directly.

Oh man, why you gotta hurt my heart anon?! (Tw angst, sensitive topics, and bad languages)

Poor Mk. I would imagine this happening early on in the therapy era, where Mk and Nezha are still struggling to get their feet back under them and establish a new (more healthy) normal. Mk be trying to just live his life, until said ex’s contact him. I don’t think it would be the ones where Mk was the toxic one, those are the ones who generally just want to move on. But one of HIS bad exes would def do something drastic.

They would see him rise in the public view already (hero stuff), so to see him so open and public with Nezha, a PRINCE, has them seething. Messaging, spamming, the works. MK’s mental health would take a big hit, and he actually talks either Sandy in therapy about it first.

Sandy is the one to suggest going to Mei, and def about telling the others just in case. Mk does, but wants to maybe tell Nezha after the whole things blown over so as not to worry him. Until said exes contact Nezha.

Nezha, of course, ain’t buying shit. In fact, it only serves to piss him off. Nobody in the mortal realm was really aware of the JE’s passing until Nezha decides to find these exes. You know why they find out?

Because Nezha has them dragged into the streets via guards, and publicly demands to know why they would dare threaten the lover of the next Jade emperor (aka him). Mei has all the evidence against the two, and the mortal police have to beg the prince not to cause an international crisis. The two exes have, at this point, realized the grave miscalculation they’ve made and are panicking just a a tad.

Thankfully Mk shows up and convinces Nezha to let the police handle it. The exes are arrested, and reporters and paparazzi catch Mk soothing Nezha’s anger. Their approval ratings in the public eye EXPLODES after this.

Of course it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Mk still gets stuck it a bit of a rut because of them, and while no other exes have come forth after Nezha’s public display, it doesn’t stop the paranoia. Poor baby’s got a date with more therapy after this. But at least things are smooth sailing right? Not like Nezha’s got any exes to dig up.

Oops, did I say that? I meant Ao Bing has an absolute fit. :)

[officialclangen]

Hya! Do any of the ppl in charge of coding have any recommendations for people who wanna learn? Looking to make my own game but not sure where to start 😅😅 ty!!

I don't work on Clangen as a coding dev, but I am working to become a programmer as a career, so maybe some of my advice might be helpful?

One thing is, What programming language are you working in? Games use a variety of programming languages depending on what they need. Clangen itself is built on Pygame, which runs on the programming language Python. Python's a more "beginner-friendly" language, due to it being written in more regular English. Lots of game engines use stuff like C# or C++ for their memory efficiency though. Choose what you need!

Either way, you'll need to learn the basics of programming before you start going nuts. I'd look up tutorials online for learning that, and make a bunch of small bad programs. You've got to practice it to do it! Also, you're going to break stuff. Don't be afraid of it. Whenever you're doing anything different, stuff is going to be slightly broken at first. You've just got to take another look and the answer might be way more obvious than you think!

✦ Chibi ✦

[our-trans-punk-experience]

What does it really mean to be a "punk?" Is it a subculture? An ideology? Both? Something else?

It seems very interesting to me but I'm afraid that it'll turn into something where I have to sacrifice myself for the cause/scene/group or something. I'm not doing that. Period. I want to do stuff, you know? I want to fight. I want to make music. But I don't want to worship an idol of rigid Marxist analysis that asserts itself as the one true way of understanding our world as well as the one true moral framework. Not that I'm a big fan of morality anyways. I'm not joining The Christian Church 2.0. I'm not hanging with the bougie college kids who worship labor and workers.

I like anarchism because I want to do whatever I want. Period. It is a distinctly egoistic affair for me- think max stirner. That's not to say that I'm going to ignore critical theory stuff entirely (as I myself am a neurodivergent queer). I want to learn about the struggles of POC, queer people, neurodivergent people, et cetera so that I can resist against society and government. However, I don't want to be some kind of liberal politically-correct type that brings up their own identity in unrelated topics because they want to feel important. I'm not a twitter user.

I already know that I can do with concepts whatever I like. If I don't want to be "punk" then that's not going to stop me from being anarchist. People who feel the need to attach themselves to subcultures because they wanna feel correct and agreeable are fuckin' dweebs. What I want to know is what's in it for me. Why should I be "punk?"

OkOk tysm for being so engaged i love when ppl rlly are not afraid to grill me for information

1: Punk is a subculture, with a variety of politics in the scene, united by non-conformity and being anti-establishment / anti-authority.

2: You should in no way have to sacrifice anything about yourself, your style, or your politics to be punk. The whole idea is non-conformity so you do not have to meet any sort of criteria for style, music, or politics except the aforementioned [on a separate note i just answered an ask on punk politics, but could make another more in depth punk politics post on request].

2a: If someone on the scene gives you shit for enjoying showtunes and britpop alongside black flag and x-ray spex then that person is a wanker

2b: If someone in the scene gives you shit for wearing a battle vest with an mcr patch or a logo from a tv show you like alongside your eat the rich stitch-on then that person is a wanker

2c: if someone in the scene gives you shit for being punk in the "wrong way" then they are the one who doesn't understand what it means to be punk. they are, say it with me, a wanker

3: yeah dw, punk is not in any way synonymous w champagne socialist theory purists like you fear, its about action and small acts of resistance and mutual aid more than holding out on doing anything helpful bc it isnt a great communist revolution. we are the revolution

4: I like that you've done your reading. just as an aside.

5: yes I'd say esp nowadays (less so in the 70s) punk is a scene that has a strong focus on queer rights movement. The original punk focuses were more about class and race tensions, but as the subculture has evolved, the fight has become about standing up for anyone getting screwed over by the fuckers on top. you are in the right place for learning about the struggles facing multiple groups and how you can help them for sure

6: fear not, becoming a punk does not mean you have to join twitter

7: "I already know that I can do with concepts whatever I like." Good. You've got the hard part down already.

8: Your final point, on why you should be punk, has a bunch of different answers. Be punk bc its a great gender neutral term of address. Be punk because it'll make it easier for you to find cool ppl u get on with. Be punk bc we have good music. Be punk because DIYing your clothes is very rewarding. Be punk because it's an amazing community. Be punk bc tbfh you seem pretty punk already. You've sort of gone in reverse order to a lot of punks. You really have a good grasp on your own politics and philosophies, and you're clearly anti-conformist. If you want you can now work back into the music, the style, and immersing yourself in the subculture. We would love to have you

Do whatever you like, hope this was helpful

in solidarity :]

[thedawningofthehour]

thanks for answering my ask! man, being trafficked sucks major ass. free lou

do you think being attracted to/courting humans is normalized among the yokai or is it more of a niche thing (like the how most ppl are weirded out by furries or foot fetishists)? like that pink cat yokai spectator finding lou hot would be worthy of a hear-me-out cake? big Mama straight up says she finds lou more beautiful as a rat

i guess it'd be hard for a yokai romance a human w/o keeping their real species a secret. can yokai and humans naturally interbreed?

I'm assuming there was some Yokai who got up and screamed "LEAVE LOU JITSU ALOOOOONE" in the middle of a town square at some point. There were probably tons of weird assumptions and conspiracy theories, and everyone debated on whether he was there willingly or if they should call the human president. "Of course he doesn't want to be there, he's a human fighting monsters six times his size!" "He loves that shit though, haven't you seen his human movies? He's constantly fighting stuff!" "Uh, you know humans don't like...actually hit each other in their movies, right?" "...For real?" "Yeah, they pull their punches and edit it to make it look like they did." "...Oh." "Did...did you think he actually killed those guys in Punch Chowder?"

I don't think it's that weird, just considering the sheer variety of Yokai appearances and body types. Not to mention there's plenty of human-shaped Yokai, those would be seen as more akin to Neanderthals to their Homo Sapiens in that they're not exactly like them, but close enough. (oh, for people not in the know-we fucked the Neanderthals out of existence. They didn't go extinct so much as they bred with us so much that there were eventually no pure Neanderthals left. We found them extremely hot and just kept fucking them. A lot of people today, primarily Europeans, have trace amounts of Neanderthal DNA)

The bigger issue would be the lifespans. Humans on average live like 70-80 years. Yokai can easily live to be a thousand. And Yokai ages are socialized very differently. A hundred-year-old Yokai is still very young, basically just crossing the threshold into true adulthood. A hundred-year-old human is evading the reaper. So this means that for a Yokai to meet and settle down with a human that's not a fraction of their age, they would have to do it in their young adult years-and most of them aren't doing that, because Yokai aren't pressured to get married and have kids young the same way humans are.

Like. I don't have a concrete age for Draxum, but I've been assuming he's 600-800 years old. His sister was the same age. Her husband was in his forties when Bella was born forty-five years ago.

It works because like-mentally and socially, the Draxum sibs were the equivalent of 50 or so in Yokai years, but that's still a lot of years and experience she had on him.

Plus then even if you find someone and you're able to get over the age gap-you have, what, fifty years with them? At most?

There are laws in the Hidden City that allow humans to be mutated legally, and as the spouse of a Yokai Draxum's brother-in-law would have been pretty much automatically approved. And he had applied, but the paperwork takes a few years to push through. And unfortunately we know what happened before that.

At least in my canon, Yokai and humans aren't reproductively compatible. Splinter actually got a vasectomy when he was young (generational trauma+Hollywood manwhore lifestyle, he did not want any surprises) and Big Mama just let him do that without telling him that he couldn't get her pregnant. Because she's an asshole like that. Bella and Pax are technically half-human and half-Yokai, though in practice they're really just Yokai with more obvious human characteristics, and Draxum had to make them by basically doing IVF and combining it with his ooze nonsense. And Pax has a lot of health issues stemming from his origins and unhealthy genes, which is the reason he still lives in a house owned by Draxum and does odd jobs for his uncle instead of working. The procedure was technically successful but it was deemed too costly and unreliable to serve as a solution to the Yokai's issue of an imminent genetic diversity crisis. Especially since the children it produced were sterile themselves.

[andros-paidophonoio]

My other controversial trait is I don't care for but I also don't hate Lore Olympus lmfao. I think it's frustrating to me for various reasons but all of them are completely different from the main reasons I see people hate it and I rarely see MY complaints and critiques come up which is pretty funny. Not that some critiques don't have merit, but a lot especially I remember from several years ago were ur run of the mill "sexualizing fetishizing & the young women r being led astray" from the same people also being nostalgic about their effervescent Twilight phases and problematic cartoon husbandos and it's like, let's be fucking real

I understand the being concerned about it giving the Wrong Impression of the mythological characters etc but it's just visually and stylistically SO different and distinct and basically looks and comes across like Teenybopper Inside Out. I feel like thinking it represents anything realistic to the irl material feels a little idk.....losing chess to a dog-ish. Losing chess to an archie comic. Personally I get more concerned about adapations that have an appearance and sheen of being "accurate" or educational and serious while peddling more misinformation XD So that in mind, most of my evaluation of the story is a bit separate from that aspect, which has already been discussed and analyzed a lot–i generally try to evaluate based on the internal world that a story creates and how it comes across to ME.

More of my thoughts (playing defense AND personal haterisms)

I personally find the main Fantasy of the comic to be extremely vanilla LMAO and Fine...its basically "what if I was a super hot and pretty girl but ALSO sort of underdog-ish but ALSO I had sexy older BF who was kind and listens to me and wants to worship the ground inwalk on and we have cute little fluffy conversations and dates and ALSO I'm super sexy and evil and powerful but ALSO Good and Innocent and Blameless--" it's kind of an incoherent mess, but it's trying to appeal to a variety of fantasies all at once, and I think the desires that are expressed are pretty basic ones lol. I know there's also the rumor (?) of the Hades basically being authors self insert Mads Mikkelsen au crush or whatever which ppl made fun of but like genuinely What is Wrong With That. It's a bit silly but how is that problematic or my business.

I actually liked Perse's character and parts of her arc, I think the strongest parts of the comic was parts like the gentle romance portions where characters got to "be themselves" and just hang out in more slice of life style stuff (before it weirdly delved into therapist talking). There are some really great expressions of emotion and nervousness around sex and desire and shame. And the fantasy of having an understanding person to be a friend and talk to and open up to and speak in a respectful way was pretty sweet, and a lot MORE gentle than tbh a lot of Edgy Romance where theove interest is just Mean and Insulting for a while. So while I find aspects of maybe the characters getting flat, I found that personally kind of more positive in terms of "lessons and takeaways." So it's funny to me when ppl talk about the comic as The Most Evil Fetishizing Ever when so much of it honestly feels sanded down to Niceness lmfao. I also weirdly found that it felt at times very sexually or sensually restrained–like I get it's for more younger audience, but the kind of coy dancing around stuff at times (I wonder from webtoon meddling) felt weirder than maybe being more open about it. In a weird way, the rape scene from earlier on in the story felt more explored in how it had an impact than later parts. I wonder if that's because it was before it became so popular and also started getting more attention and criticisms that then seem to have subsumed into the work in weird ways.

I guess it's overall, in the end, one of those stories that is very much speaking to the modern age and the modern (straight ig) young women; where the OG Story and hymn was about grief of losing child to a marriage out of ur control (and includes the comfort of other mothers or matriarchs), I feel this (clumsily) speaks to a kind of different struggle. Aka the issue of wanting to express and enjoy sexuality freely but being faced with the prospect of interpersonal sexual violence, or people seeking to control said sexuality either out of protection or their own gain, the idea that you become seen as "evil" once u express ur sexual desires or become "tainted" by association with a man in a way that isn't a Socially Sanctioned way. It's clumsy, but it's real, and a lot of stories I see in this subject are grappling with this a lot. Esp for an era where many women do have a lot more freedom to pursue and find partners by choice than in ancient times, but the journey to that kind of happiness can be held up by such adverse experiences and subsequent emotional states/expectations.

I think my problem with a lot of romantic stuff, including this, that wants to balance these twin fantasies–one of being Very Powerful and Dangerous, but also of being Blameless and Good, are often kind of at odds and can result in some pretty Bad Storytelling that often ends up kind of trying to backtrack and do apologism for the Bad Actions in a way that just feels weak And noncommittal (if ur gonna be evil girl BE EVIL), and also kind of gets weird because The Protagonist, and the Couple(tm) must Always Be Good, and this cannot always be the case!!! In fact, it can make characters end up looking worse lol. Solomon's Crown does this too and that I am offended by for the same reasons!!!

Anyways, I haven't finished the whole comic, although I found a lot of the later arcs very intriguing although it took too fucking long to get to it because of the other problems that irritated me which consist of the following in no particular order:

THE VERY UNFUNNY HUMOR. I hated the jokes so much. I feel this is a problem with a lot of serials where they try to stay topical but boy I do not give a shit. That and when characters started speaking more like therapists, it brings the Drama to a screeching halt. And we are supposed to be HERE for drama!!! This is the main reason it always takes me so long to read like there will be an interesting serious scene and then the jokes will be so bad and deflating the impact. Sad!

Minthe. Treatment of her character left a bad taste in my mouth; last I left off I kind of liked more time spent on her, but in general i just felt really weird about the role her character played

Generally disinterested in all the other characters aside from the main couple. Perse is really fun and I feel there's the most "real" experience poured into her mixed with fantasy.

The opening episodes are indeed extremely off-putting to me so I don't blame people for not getting into it bc it starts off with some bro-y behavior that is corny. And it never quite feels "established" in its setting which is an issue to me with a lot of webtoons but for here especially it feels very like I said earlier like Teenybopper Inside Out. These characters are fantastical concepts, but only at times do they feel real as People

Anyways it's one of those things where I can genuinely see the charm in it--i can see exactly why it blew up how it did, but also like most webtoon it invites the most simplified types of comments ever where every single character has to be Good or Bad and if anyone does anything complex everyone throws a riot. So I don't doubt that the environment in which the story was produced affected the way that it is formatted and created. In this sense it's an interesting work to consider culturally and sociplogically. I think it is part of the greater conversation of why such works connect to people for greater or ill at all. Still, the Bad Jokes will keep me from probably having the true knowledge and I definitely will continue going my own way

(I do have a few AU concepts tho I'd like to think about sometimes....infeel like some aspects of the story I think a transmasc perse is interesting to think about, especially the whole weird definitions of the "fertility goddess" and "pure maiden" aspect, and the desire for LO!Apollo to want them to embody kind of an Ideal Wifepartner to gain power and prestige...more disturbing but also interesting implications and stakes to think about. canon LO I see seems to be about moving from maiden to the fertility goddess aspect but what if there were other identity avenues to be explored? Also I was thinking that a lot of the LO haters I get it we don't like cringe heteros that's fair but I know a lot of y'all r reading BL that use the EXACT SAME TROPES but even more corny and it's like.....sometimes humans crave corniness I get it. It would be too many layers of gender for the original to even be considering lmfao but since a lot of the story is about finding the Self and also facing resistance for it, I don't think it would be unthinkable....the fantasy worldbuilding going on is like ??? But sometimes it produces some stuff I think more deeply about)

[just-a-carrot]

carrot bestie pal chum I gotta know……who drew the backgrounds in our wonderland bc they are STUNNING???????????????? like every time I play it with someone they comment on how good the backgrounds look at least once.

also I wanna know some of your inspirations for your art style, especially how you draw characters :3

HELP they are photos???? they are all either free stock photos I got from unsplash or pixabay or photos I took myself that I ran through my secret (lol) series of four different filters all at different transparencies

finding the right photos took me literally hours sometimes because you are pretty limited when it comes to the free stuff and finding the exact vibe or setting I had pictured in my mind was sometimes impossible so I'd just be scrolling through 100s of photos and would finally sometimes just have to choose the best one I could find. some in particular were especially hard: do you know how hard it is to find interior house/room photos that don't look like they come out of catalogues??? 🤣

also some photos were kinda pieced together or had additional edits or tweaks made before the filters because there are a lot of OW settings that aren't exactly realistic... (the cauldron shot was a photo I took inside some salt mines that I pasted I think iron smelting cauldrons over the top of and then did a bunch of edits and lighting and coloring stuff)

I'm glad ppl like them tho!! 🤣 I was really at a loss what to do for BGs because I'm not skilled enough drawing BGs and didn't have money to pay for them either (especially so many!!!). I like how they ended up and the look of them in the game a lot. Tho I do sometimes fantasize about having custom drawn BGs that could match everything more exactly. also I've been practicing a lot more with BG drawing and gotten a lot better so probably in the future my games I'll try to draw all the BGs myself

regarding style inspiration hmmm... it's hard to say any one specific thing. I remember the turning point for me starting down the road towards this style was a piece of art for the band creature feature I really liked, and I started drawing some macabre pen sketches kinda pulling some of the style elements. When I look at my art that's the first time I see my noses start to look more like my current noses. And the ears started to grow in size, even as I look at fanart after that for various stuff they all started to have larger ears and the round noses even as I was drawing a variety of different things haha but overall besides that I can't remember a specific thing that inspired the style, I feel like it kinda evolved once I started drawing the more cartoony stuff and I realized I liked the look of the oversized elements and the exaggerated fluidity so over the years I kept amping those parts I liked up more and more

[destinyc1020]

Tom's fans are different, but they speak the facts. It's absolutely normal to want a successful project for your favorite actor because his work and talent should be recognized. It's also normal when you want to see activity on Tom's part. Sometimes some of Tom's fans are negative, but in many ways they are honest, to me they are much better than some hypocritical TZ fans who claim to be equally staned Tom and Zendaya, but in fact they are Zendaya's fans first and foremost. By the way, your theory is very interesting and I think to some extent I can agree with it. But at the same time, it amuses me how sometimes you are too optimistic or do not notice serious problems with some things related to Tom

I mean, I don't mind if fans are honest about their faves. I've always said that I'm 100% honest here on my blog about how I feel about a variety of people and topics. 🤷🏾‍♀️

But to me, it seems as though some fans of Tom (notice I said SOME) can be a bit harsh on him, or complain about things that in the grand scheme of things, really aren't big deals in the long run. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Or, they'll make blanket negative statements that aren't even true, like, "it's normal to want a successful project for your favorite actor" (as if Tom hasn't had MULTIPLE successful projects already?? 🥴🤔), or, you"want to see activity on his part" (as if, we don't get Tom content either through himself, friends, and or family on a REGULAR basis). Look, some actors out here don't even have social media at all, or never post, or don't have their parents posting content about them. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Yet, ppl are still their fans.

I've already made peace with the fact that we're not going to get the same social media happy Tom that we got in 2017. I've made peace with that with both Tom AND Zendaya tbh. If smthg harms my fave and their mental and emotional health, I'm not going to be upset if they're not posting on social media.

I will agree with you that a lot of Tom's fans are actually fans of him by extention of Zendaya, his gf. But he can't help that. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Their stars happened to rise at the same time due to their Spiderman movie that they were in together. Many fans of Z were fans of her BEFORE she got to the level that she is today though, but it's not a bad thing imo?

But at the same time, it amuses me how sometimes you are too optimistic or do not notice serious problems with some things related to Tom

I just feel like Tom's fans are a bit hard on him, and undermine his success already in the industry all the time (his R&J PLAY sold out in like 2 hours!!!) Like, c'mon. 😏

And what "serious problems" are there related to Tom exactly? Is he on drugs? Is he wilding out? Does he look depressed? Is he looking homeless? Has he lost a ton of weight in a short amount of time? Is he acting crazy out in these streets? To me, those are "serious problems" and signs that an actor is going through smthg. All the other stuff you've mentioned aren't "serious problems" imo Anon.

Yes, we all want great things for our fave actors, and of course we wish them the best! 😃 But unless there are some serious issues going on in that actor's life, we need to know our place as FANS, and let an actor live his (or her) life! Actors usually only film about 1 or 2 films a year (if THAT), and the rest of the time, they're working bts, negotiating other future projects, promoting current projects, or simply just taking a break. When you're at Tom's level of success, you can afford to take longer breaks if needed. He's been working and going non-stop for over 7 years. If the man wants to take a break, his fans should be okay with that. Jmho 🤷🏾‍♀️

[kuromi-hoemie]

Hey Cinna, I've been looking into making my own accessories, especially chokers, but trying to figure out where and how to start has been extremely overwhelming to figure out what tools I need and where to even begin figuring out what supplies I would need to start.

All of your chokers have looked incredible, so I was wondering if you have any resources you could share for starting out and learning how to make chokers and other accessories?

i think the simplest way to start would be buying a standard choker from somewhere, and replacing and/or adding new spikes.

going into it u wanna look at how they've made their choker to get a good feel for what goes into it.

after you get it enough to try making your own, you can go buy leather strips from a crafting store; Leathercrafting or Leatherworking is what you'd wanna look up more generally depending on how deep you wanna go (and assuming u mean my style of chokers which r usually leather)

For changing a choker then making my own, tools i would start with are:

a hole punch for leather, lots of kits will come with the one you use a mallet with. this is quieter and faster, i prefer this :3

spikes, tree cone spikes if ur feeling a lil specific. note their measurements and buy whatever speaks to u or meets ur needs. i love having a variety to experiment with.

a little screwdriver for the back of ur spikes. they come with most kits or sets i think

rivets and snaps, watch how to set one and look at how they are used on the choker you got. get some buckles if you wanna try recreating that instead.

O rings and D rings. it's obvious what these are when you say it, but it wasn't at first 🧍🏾‍♀️they come in a variety of sizes and colors

jump rings which are used to connect D and O rings together, or for more stylistic purposes.

also some jewelry making kit from a craft store. specifically you just want a set of pliers, the flat one and needle nose tips are particularly helpful

some round cutters if you wanna use leather strips from a craft store or whatever to make a new choker

and then this one is very optional but i have this kit that comes with different detachable heads u can set or punch with. u don't have to know what they all do at first, but they will come in handy!

starting with just modifying an existing choker is a good way to observe and learn about the basics, once u start making ur own it's pretty easy to start experimenting and mixing things up.

if u need inspiration on what's possible, u can look at existing work. there are my chokers I've posted; one site whose work i love is NastyGem. their stuff is pricy but it's beautiful and inspiring to me.

for more help u should join crafting/art discord servers, and more generally try to keep an eye out for ppl familiar w ur craft. i am still learning too and i like to watch the processes be done on youtube or read an article abt the semantics of something. there's also me (❁´◡`❁) i am happy to share whatever i know if you have specific questions.

[stacksattack]

how would you define bi-gay in your experience?? asking bc it might be something im interested in as far as defining myself but idk bc i havent seen many ppl actually talk abt their experience and how it feels bc theyre usually just having to deal with assholes who are freaking out over someones identity that has literally nothing to do w them,, srry if youve answered smthn like this b4 btw

i havent gotten an ask abt it before its fine ^_^ i will say though that labels like mine can mean wildly different things between people and my reasonings for labeling myself this way . there is a LOT of variety within "mspec gay" communities as people have dubbed them and my experience may be completely different from someone else's. as someone who also went thru the same struggle of not knowing if it fit my only advice is to try it and see how you feel, because thats how i got here and i just in general hold the belief that if youre thinking abt a label theres probably a good reason behind it, even if you dont end up sticking with it in the end

anyways im putting my ramble under tha cut becaus it might be long. i like talking. yayy frolic

if something here does not make sense please be nice i am just generally Not very good at speaking, especially when it comes to explaining shit like feelings on stuff, and also i have a headache

my label as a bi gay man specifically stems from the fact that the way i experience attraction to men feels distinctly different from the way i experience attraction to women, but also not distinct enough to define it in a more concrete way like aesthetic or romantic attraction (the latter of which i do not experience). it's a very weird feeling and something i just kind of know rather than something i can explain. its also partially that i dont experience attraction towards those groups in equal amounts, and that feels significant enough for me to not feel completely comfortable calling myself only bi, because i feel as though that frames my attraction to both groups as the same amount, i guess? and that also ties back to feeling as though the way i experience attraction to those two groups is different

i briefly considered calling myself both gay and straight because i think its extremely funny (shoutout to people who do that. you're so real) but i like the label of bi more. i couldnt really give a reason for this other than it just feels more accurate

im still figuring out this specific aspect of my identity and how exactly things feel "different" outside of a weird nebulous feeling of them being different for no apparent reason but for right now this is what i've settled on calling myself and its helped a lot. but again a lot of people will have many different experiences with these sorts of labels

[pooklet]

Get to know you: Sims Style

I was tagged by @pockethamster and @furbyq-sims so here we goooo.

What’s your favorite Sims death?

In general: the satellite, cuz of the piano replacement that I have. It is also one of the most efficient ways to cull townies.

Specific deaths that have happened to my sims: Tiara dying in a toddler potty. No death in my game has ever/will ever be funnier.

Alpha CC Semi-realism or Maxis Match?

Semi-realism. Maybe it's cuz I started playing when that was the common style, but maxis match just looks very ... flat to me? Very papery. I've seen it done in a really fun, cartoon-y style by some creators, but that seems to be the minority and most of it seems to hew very neutral/natural toned and I am not about that lol. Even IRL, I like to surround myself with bright, colorful stuff.

Do you cheat your sims weight?

Like, keep them thin? lmao no. I let their personality determine whether they exercise, but that has nothing to do with them being fat, as far as I'm concerned. I use a lot of fat bodyshapes because I'm fat myself and I like to have a lot of variety in my game. I don't have any system for deciding whether I use the maxis default body or a custom shape, I just go with what looks right to me.

Do you move objects?

Are there people who don't?

Favorite Mod?

Hm, either ACR v2 or Walk Through Blocks. I like my sims to be able to make as many autonomous decisions as possible, and navigate the spaces that I cram full of clutter.

First Expansion/Game Pack/Stuff Pack?

In the Sims 1 the first expansion I got was Hot Date. I played TS2 from release, so my first expansion was University.

Do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?

Alive.

Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

I mean, it has to be Mawreen, right? If only for the chaos that she's sown.

Have you made a simself?

Yeah a few throughout the years, and I haven't played them in ages. Mostly I just use them for silly little pics with @skulldilocks's selfsim.

Which is your favorite EA hair color?

One of the custom ones, I guess! I don't remember, I have all the EA hairs hidden lol.

Favorite EA hair?

I don't have one, really. Maybe some of the natural black hairstyles converted from TS4 but I couldn't name specific meshes.

Favorite life stage?

Adult! I made a custom aging mod so I can go through the other stages relatively quickly. The way my game is set up, they unlock all their traits and wants once they're an adult, and I like to see who they are as a fully realized person, so that's the most fun for me.

Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

Gameplay. I have a lot of fun making houses based on real floorplans that I find, but it's mostly just stage dressing for the little freaks that inhabit them.

Are you a CC creator?

Yeh.

Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?

I mean, @skulldilocks obvs. People don't approach me much so there's only a few ppl that I talk to regularly like @furbyq-sims and @lilithpleasant. I am not really the "squad" type.

Do you have any sims merch?

This is a real thing?

Do you have a YouTube for sims?

Nope! I would never stream gameplay, the way I play isn't interesting. Lots of pausing and carefully adjusting angles to take pictures, getting distracted by other stuff, random crashes, etc. And editing that footage into something watachable would take ages. My play style lends itself better to picture entries, so I use Dreamwidth.

How has your “Sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?

More colors, more aliens, more [[JAM FACTORY]] lore.

Who’s your favorite CC creator?

@skulldilocks no question! I love watching her create anything for any game or craft. She's so talented. It doesn't matter if she's making sims cc or custom houses for Skyrim or doll clothes or anything else, she's my biggest inspiration.

How long have you had Simblr?

2010, babeyyyy.

How do you edit your pictures?

I have a tutorial here. I need to update it because I use different actions now, but most of the actual information there is still accurate.

What expansion/gamepack is your favorite?

I want to say pets because I love cats so very much, but in terms of actual content, probablyyyy FreeTime? I like anything that makes sims more unique and the hobby system is a lot of fun!

I tag: @skulldilocks, @lilithpleasant, @krabbysims, @monilisasims, @goatskickin and @simmer-until-tender

[meadowmousey]

hi im gonna vent about my non existent sex life to my 3 followers now.

I’m in a ltr with an older man (i know) and it’s pretty cool for the most part except for the fact that i never get fucked lmao. it was pretty frequent and fun for the first like 8 months and now I’m lucky to get any like once a month. We got sick in winter 2022/2023, he had a terrible reaction psychologically. At first I understood bc like. We were REALLY sick. And then we got better. And I would try to initiate something and he would just give me the “maybe later” or “another day” stuff, and I wouldn’t ask again for like a week or so. And then I started doing a little amateur adult content as a side hustle, and he would take the pictures and stuff for me. So I would try to get a lil spicy. And he would turn me down. And I don’t know how to describe how absolutely shit it feels to have someone taking lewd pictures of you and them be completely turned off. Ouch. I started doing the pictures/videos alone and I would send him the best ones. He’d sometimes save them but usually I would get some half assed response. So I just stopped bc it made me feel gross. I’m like terminally horny as a person. I could fuck like 3x a day and still go again. I haven’t been able to get a “round two” since like August of 2022. He also presented himself when we first getting to know each other as super kinky and experimental. And he was at first. But it’s so vanilla since we got sick. Like, two positions and barely any variety. We bought some toys and rope and stuff. One of them we haven’t even used. Well, I have but it was alone. He told me, when I was first starting to really have my feelings hurt about his lack of sexual interest, that he has a hard time seeing me as both his life partner and as someone he can do kink with. And that really hurt. Like really bad. Like sure, the ppl he dated before he didn’t love (or the 1 night stands) the way he loves me. So how does it make sense that he gave them all the vulnerability and trust that kink involves but I can’t have that?? And then he says that we’re different, we’re better than most people because we don’t need to have a relationship based off sex. Homeboy if we did, the relationship would have withered and died ages ago. I’m a human being in my 20’s, I’m fucking horny!! I don’t understand why he thinks that it’s fair for him to have gotten to hook up and do all the fun stuff with other people, and now it’s just over for him forever. What about me? What about what I need? Like, I already feel like the once a month boring ass 30 minutes I get is a chore for him. I don’t want him to do anything he doesn’t feel comfortable with. It’s just really hurtful and unfair. I know he doesn’t wanna do an open relationship and I don’t either, but at this point I am so sexually frustrated. I feel embarrassed for wanting sex. I feel like he sees me as some kind of pure and untouchable thing, which makes no sense. I’ve always been up front about being really sexual, and kinky , and open, and unconventional. It’s like he refuses to see a whole entire side of me, except very superficially when we do get sexual. And even then I can tell he’s not really that enthusiastic, it seems like he’s on a mission to make both of us cum as quickly as possible. It’s not even fun anymore and I just feel so self conscious and shitty. It really fucking sucks not even being 25 with a dead bedroom. I’ve been trying to curb my sexual appetite as much as I can but at this point I’m gonna start chewing my fucking fingers off. The worst part is I know I’m not ugly. I know if most people had the chance they would happily get into bed with me. So why is it that the person who DOES get to, doesn’t even want it anymore?? I know he could have his pick of anybody as well. We were so compatible and so much happier when we were having sex more. Now I’m so full of resentment that I have a hard time connecting with him at all. I hate that I feel like this but I’m having to squash such big feelings 24/7. Ugh. Anyway.

[sharpth1ng]

I hope it's okay to ask you that. I realised I'm trans about a year ago. I usually say I'm a transman so ppl don't get confused but I'd say I'm more non-binary, just very far on the masc spectrum. I was just wondering if you also had like a honeymoon phase? The euphoria I felt was quite intense and my body disphoria wasn't too bad I thought I could handle it. But now the euphoria died down a little and I'm constantly questioning myself and tze dysphoria hit me hard too this week. I think it's the backlash of my family tho that made my excitement die down... I thought After the honeymoon phase it would settle in more comfortably and not make me more anxious. Sorry, now I'm rambling... You don't have to answer this ofc, but idk, in case you wanna share

Hey, I think what you're going through is super normal (as much as it's not fun).

In my experience dysphoria can be something that fluctuates for a wide variety of reasons. I'll talk about it and maybe you'll relate, but don't take this as an exhaustive list it's just based on my experience and I can't speak for everyone.

1. Experiencing transphobia, even indirectly or in microaggressions can trigger dysphoria.

This could be something like watching transphobic content online, or even something like coming out to someone and having them respond with confusion or what I can only describe as disappointment (yk that thing when cis people say they need to mourn the gender you had before). It could also be something much more malicious and dangerous than that, but I'm not going to get into that here.

It's an othering experience, it highlights your identity in a negative way, and it's easy to have old patterns of internalized transphobia wake up in response to that. Even now that I've completed all the medical transition that I ever will that kind of experience that can trigger older dysphoria.

Especially having to deal with family that doesn't understand or people who question you, that kind of stuff can really get in your head and turn you against yourself.

A big contributor to this lately is people fear mongering about how HRT will irreversibly destroy your body (it wont), and make you unattractive based on cis standards (it often doesn't, but why should we care about that?). It presents a medically transitioning body as horrific, and shames those who don't transition medically for not being 'real' (which is also bullshit).

Early in my transition i was confronted with so many people questioning how i really know, and it freaked me out, made me question myself constantly. It made me forget that I know because I feel it. Thats the only evidence you can have for your own gender identity. No one else, not even the most qualified psychiatrist, is able to figure that out for you.

2. Sometimes when you treat one kind of dysphoria you realize that it was drowning out another kind of dysphoria.

This happened to me a few times, like when I got people to start using he/him pronouns and my physical dysphoria got a lot more noticeable. It happened again when I finally got top surgery and my bottom dysphoria decided to get a lot worse.

This obviously isn't going to happen to everyone, but for me it felt like once I was happy with my pronouns and my chest, then my brain had time to focus on something that had always been lurking in the background.

I had always had a level of bottom dysphoria, but I think there's sort of different stages. Like early on you just feel sort of disconnected from a body part, then maybe you start to associate it with confusion and anxiety, and then once you realize that its something you can maybe change is when it really feels the worst, at least consciously.

Its not a new kind of dysphoria materializing out of nowhere, it's just that sometimes one type of pain can hide another type of pain, and when that first type is cured you notice the second.

I wouldn't go back on any of my transition. Before my dysphoria was hurting me in much more harmful and hidden ways, but there's a unique kind of pain that comes from allowing yourself to fully feel something for the first time. You can ride it out, it will fade, you'll find a way to treat it or you'll find a way to manage it if you can't. But it does really suck to get blindsided by that.

3. When you aren't binary or when you're fluid in either gender or presentation, there's a kind of dysphoria from being forced into an arbitrarily binary world that is hard to escape.

Im having a hard time figuring out exactly how to explain this one so I'm going to start in talking about my own experience.

I feel a need to have a masculinized body, and medical transition was absolutely necessary for me. I'd much rather be referred to with he pronouns than she pronouns, and the natural way I emote and carry my body is often perceived as more masculine than feminine.

All of that is true but I also don't know how to understand myself as a man the way other men are (this is just me, i know for a fact other trans men feel like men in the exact same way other men do). He pronouns are better than she, but it/its pronouns are the only ones that make me happy.

I don't really identify with colonial conceptions of gender in general. My understanding of gender means that I just don't think any of our pre-made categories are particularly useful because the traits we use to define them are mostly arbitrary. I don't like dissecting my identity along lines drawn by a system that doesn't represent me.

I tell most people I'm a trans man. I did used to identify that way but over time I've realized the language that feels like it actually captures me is 2spirit. A lot of people don't know what that is though, and I often don't have the energy for an explanation of the fact that our gender and sexuality categories are a colonial construct. When I do, it opens me up to hearing a bunch of anti-indigenous bullshit.

(Everytime I see a post of passing tips for trans men, theres a point about cutting your hair, like braids aren't of massive cultural significance for a lot of native men. And people will just act like the binary is innate. Natural. It's exhausting.)

All that is to say that most of the time I feel like I'm telling half-truths about my gender, and doing that can put you in a weird mental space. It makes you feel like you're fake, or some kind of imposter.

And all of that comes before even thinking about gender presentation.

If I dress in a way thats more binary or masculine I get treated like a binary man in a way that makes me uncomfortable. In particular women and visibly queer people seem less open around me, which makes me feel horribly sad. As a result I often intentionally dress in a more visibly queer way than I would otherwise.

On the other hand, on the rare occasion that I dress in a way that leans more feminine, the I get she/her pronouns (which makes me uncomfortable) or people notice my masculinized body and treat me with what I can only assume is misplaced transmisogyny.

None of these shifts in presentation correspond to a change in my gender. If anything my gender has always been the same and Im more accurately described as a transsexual, in that my sex needed to change, but that doesn't really have anything to do with affirming my gender.

All of this is fucking confusing. Depending on how I present on any given day I can have different weird kinds of dysphoria get triggered, simply because when you're gender non-conforming at all you get othered. Even when i'm in a more binary masculine outfit I feel out of place because I know my internal experience doesn't match what people see when they look at me.

All of that is really long winded, and I don't even know if I'm expressing it properly, but the point I'm trying to illustrate is that the mere experience of being measured up to a binary gender when you aren't binary can be confusing and dysphoria inducing.

Its also important to remember that cis people experience gender dysphoria too.

Cis women who are insecure about having a small chest, being too tall, having facial hair- those women are experiencing dysphoria. Its the same for cis men who are insecure about penis size, the width of their hips, not being muscular enough, ect.

When society has defined a narrow range of biological realities as "correct" the majority of people are not going to fit in, and when you don't fit in it causes you to feel like your body isn't the way its supposed to be, whether or not you're trans. Even worse we don't acknowledge the ways in which constructed gender is mostly only accessible to people can at least seem to have a white, cis, hetero, perisex, thin, abled body.

Because of that, dysphoria doesn't necessarily go away fully when we transition, and thats ok. Its probably going to come and go for you, it will change over time, and most likely it will fade, A LOT as you settle into yourself. The euphoria will come and go too. Thats all a normal part of having a human body.

As long as transition moves us closer to a place that feels comfortable then it's worth it. It doesn't have to fix us or make us perfect. We only have to prefer it to the alternative.