#they get divorced every other week
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i love how charles and erik’s relationship trope is strangers to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers
#they get divorced every other week#atp everyone just goes “again?”#it’s a constant cycle#cherik#xmen first class#x men#magneto#charles xavier#erik x charles#charles x erik#xmen#xmen movies#x men first class#x men movies#x men memes#professor x#first class#marvel#mcu#mcu memes#mcu fandom#marvel cinematic universe#marvel memes#marvel xmen#fox xmen
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"You saved me so I can kill you", "my wretch of a wife", and "30 seconds" all happened in this series, yet y'all cry divorce on the ranchers.
#and i dont mean this in a 'theyre secretly cuddling between sessions uwu' way#i mean all their interactions have been at most silly at least completely neutral#yall act like theyre bitterly trying to murder each other in every scene theyve been in together#like the one time they ever dealt damage to the other wasnt immediately followed by an apology#the fh people are still out here even after the entirety of dl and 24l so far and yall are here acting like ranchers is made of sugar glass#team rancher#if you like angst thats fine but theres so many post crying that its all over#or acting like its a struggle#you dont need copium when they havent even done anything#sorry but every other duo gets a dramatic devastating moment to point to for why theyre divorced#and the worst ranchers get is 'if we ever 1v1 i could totally beat you anyways running away now' for people to act just as devastated#sorry im super salty this week#and just tired of rancher tags being walls of 'the world is ending and theres no recovery'
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A lot of you guys in the replies had really good/funny things to say about the concept of a "subaru being technically under house arrest in the felt camp route" tags and I'd love to talk about it w you too but I feel kinda bad taking over ops post 😭
#someone did say that rein does the lap pillow emotional breakdown scene in this route though which is great 👍 but what i wanted to say was#well does the seemingly-inevitable-in-every-route reinbaru divorce still happen????#they're already good friends in the main route but we're proposing one here where they're far closer if not just due to proximity#but like just going through more shit together instead of reinhard being MIA most of the time bc him being around makes the group too strong#so#but actually it would be kinda funny if it happens in a similar way to his falling out with emilia in arc 3 but this time#he ends up staying at the roswaal estate instead of with the crusch camp#it'll let him get closer with the others before they're all attacked by the witch cult#and then stuff can go down similarly but differently. I'm sure there's some way to rope in the ana and crusch camps though#''ferris julius i have some important business i need to tend to can you guys go check on my idiot for me?#yes the one you beat up last week please just go.''#''he's not signing the papers'' LOL#re:zero
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#negativity cw#mother mention cw#also something else about my mom & therapy vent#on Dec 22 and 23 2022#both days she spent hours screaming at me#about many many many things#but key standouts were that she was gifting my father divorce papers for Christmas and it would be my fault#(she never did do it lmao and a year later they’re celebrating 30 years together)#that I had looked like a clown and a grandma at my college graduation a couple of weeks prior#(a few weeks later she asked if I could order the professional photos taken at the ceremony)#she also has never expressed any remorse for the 2022 winter screamfest#which just further highlights to me why I don’t care about her experience in therapy#and it is also the reason why I will never acknowledge any of my parents’ anniversaries again with anything other than#a one line no punctuation ‘Congrats’ in the family group chat#you don’t get to blame me for your adult problems in your adult union every year since I was 14#and then expect me to celebrate that union
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having a group of gay friends where this is their first group of gay friends apparently means they don’t find my “our one token straight friend is like a little gay” jokes funny apparently aksjsjs or when i bitch specifically about the gay dating scene near chicago being dominated by annoying white ex theater gays, they immediately get into like “well there are messy gay poc” yeah i’m aware of that, i’m talking about a really specific issue with the gays in this area pls keep up
#it is a well accepted fact that the gay scene in chicago has a large annoying white gay section who are the Messiest & Cringiest bitches#that have ever lived and every gay scene has A Group that annoys the shit out of everyone else in the scene okay aksjsns#all the lesbians in my area are either married with kids or constantly at a club and i know this bc i have dated lesbians in this area#half the stereotypes about gay people in illinois are about the ex theater gays or party gays in boystown like aksjdjdj come on#i cannot be the only one in tune with the Community here#also if u don’t agree that our straight friend who is always mentioning female celebs she’d go gay for wouldn’t fall in love with some#lady version of sam heughan when she wears an outlander mask to work every day u r just factually incorrect okay#rani makes text posts no one will read#but we were talking about these really specific messy white gay people we know & it’s like yeah so one of them already having a committed#partner 2 weeks after filing for divorce & all of them being like high powered lawyers that spend their free time taking their kids to see#wicked at the oriental theater is just a really specific type of gay person that i’ve dated a lot aksksjsj#and also they’ve been in my friend groups. they’re the only ones with cars everyone else takes the train everywhere & they refuse to go on#dates outside of chicago city limits like they’re gonna get hate crimed the moment they step off the el#which is double funny bc like do u think i live in fucking waukegan do i look like i make that much money no ur not gonna get hate crimes in#this democratic stronghold area like every other person that walks in has a pride pin or pink hair ur good buddy.
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Sorry about giving you brain damage
It will happen again
I FORGOT MY HUSBAND BECAUSE OF YOU NOW WERE PROBABLY GETTING DIVORCED AGAIN!!
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Enoch is like "I hate this bald ass bitch" about secondo and then ten minutes later he's pegging him. Love wins.
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when I was little, alternating weekends and holidays read to me like a 50/50 deal between my parents, which was probably because mom was a workaholic and never spent a second of time at home that she didn't have to on weekdays anyway. and then as I got older I spent a lot of weekday afternoons at dad's anyway because his house was much closer to my school and all my friends, but he was working nights so he was usually asleep most of that time and I still had to go back to mom's in the evenings. (I tried using this convenience of proximity as weight to negotiate to move in with him instead once. she had a screaming crying meltdown about how I don't love her and I never asked again.)
but being court-allotted 96 hours out of every 672 (14%) with a handful of bonus days throughout the year is uh. not half. it's very not half. even if we subtract school and sleeping that becomes 64 of 288 (22%). he really got fucked over trying to reach escape velocity huh.
#and yet he still managed to do more for me than she could even in her wildest shitty fantasies.#ask to tag#relevant context: prior to the divorce he was a stay at home parent#he did the cooking and cleaning#and the driving us everywhere#and the keeping us company/supervised outside of school#he even coached my soccer team#if the genders had been reversed and literally nothing else had changed#that custody arrangement would've been viewed as outright criminal#or even if we lived in topsy turvy world and same sex marriage was legal before I was born!#if they'd both been the same gender it would've been Unhinged to give the 'breadwinner' parent primary custody!#instead of the one who had actually been raising the kids!#and of course no one ever asked me or my brother what we wanted#granted I was 8 (albeit already 'mature for my age')#but my brother was 12 - definitely old enough to have a valuable opinion on his own housing#(although she was perfectly happy to do whatever I wanted to my room structure-wise when we moved into a literally-new house the next year)#(so apparently I was old enough to be allowed to have *some* opinions)#(just not ones that might affect her)#a character in a fanfic had a custody arrangement that's 2 nights every week in addition to every other weekend#which even if you pretend it doesn't matter where you sleep would literally double the amount of time you get with the kid#compared to dad's allotment.
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#the heat index is 101F and our ac has been broken for the past three weeks at work#I worked an 8 hour shift I’m exhuasted + I’m sure I have heat exhaustion (again 🙃)#and like my cheap asshole father comes to pick me up with no ac on in the car 🫠#he argues all the goddamn time that the ac uses up so much gas and that wastes money and okay whatever that’s stupid#like do you want me to just fucking pass out in the passenger seat?#and he’s mad at me cause I may have snapped#but like again 101F outside no ac at work and I’ve had heat exhaustion every day for the past three fucking weeks#it’s literally a two minute drive home#but yeah I’m not worth two mins of ac#he has been extra nasty and having extra attitude and I’m fucking done#when I’m home I literally don’t leave my room anymore#dad’s also treating mom like shit which is like#I have issues with her too but idk what his fucking problem is anymore#and then she makes her problems everyone’s problems#so they’re acting like I need to fix how they treat each other#they should’ve got fucking divorced years ago#I keep telling them to go to fucking marriage counseling or something but nope#the thing is despite being shitty they are both still my parents and it is hard to hear them talk about each other that way#hence why I’m like begging them to either divorce or get counseling#but nah then they just turn it back on me and I’m terrible cause I don’t want to help them work through their problems 🫠#sometimes I think they literally had a kid so they could just blame everything wrong with them/their lives on me#I leave for vacation in like a week-ish and oh boy I cannot tell you how relieved I am to be getting away from them for a bit#I’m sure it’ll be a shit show when I get back but that’s a problem for later me#I just need a fucking break from the shit I put up with at work and the shit I put up with at home
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if i decided to start writing about firth and charles like their lives throughout the years together and apart...would ya eat that up or ?
#i literally created so much lore already#i will draw cousin holly too bc shes very cool and i want more women in mtl#Holly always gets mistaken for Charles sister since they look so much alike#Holly is an airhead but all offdensens and the respective families related to them have jobs in high places#nobody knows exactly what she does but she has a lot of friends so shes always got a guy somewhere#which is her running gag#charles parents are divorced and he lives with his father (he visits mother for two weeks out of every month as a child)#Charles dad hates firth bc firth is far less pent up and straight laced#he was always encouraging charles more artistic side#I have so much lore about baby charles and why he is the way he is#some of it is undiagnosed autism and the other half is his father and mother being strict on WHO charles SHOULD be vs who he actually is#Charles actually has a lot of respect for his parents but especially his father even#charles doesnt like to grapple with his own abuse as a child nor does he like when firth points out like HOW abusive they were#charles mom unfortunately becomes a boy mom and charles does end up cutting her off#yeah i have so much lore ahhh
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hello, i am in need of personal advice, preferably from a transfemme person and/or parent, who isn't siobhan because she is Too Close to the situation and i don't want to do anything brash like she does
#cis friend amy fakename and her wife betty fakename got divorced after betty came out and began to transition#they have remained EXTREMELY good friends and everything and coparent really well#amy came over tonight to talk to me about betty's behavior at present#theyve been seperated for just about three years now and betty began transitioning almost five years ago#and everything has been good between them#except amy found out from their seven y/o daughter cassie that bettys (married poly) gf stays over during her week with cassie#the kind of thing that wouldve been fine except that its out of the blue and amy had to hear it from a seven yo child#same with cassie going to a sleepover with a friend and finding out —again from cassie—that betty also stayed the night#and slept with one of cassie's friends moms#and apparently numerous other things that amy didnt want to get into so i get the feeling i would be even more pissed#but every time amy tries to discuss any kind of groundrules about strangers around cassie#especially ones that 1) any doesnt know anything about amd 2) are likely not permanent#betty says that she is being transphobic for asking that she doesn't just sleep with people while cassie is there and aware#i do not know how to like#help them#siobhan is firmly on amy's side and i am too#but i dont know what i can actually do thats helpful or actionable that wont hurt either of them#cuz i do believe that betty needs to have some boundaries when there is a CHILD involved#and a child tasked with keeping secrets at that#i just dont know how to support or how to talk to betty or if i even SHOULD cuz this is a new one for all of us#we created a lil family at the shop but somehow amy and betty are the only ones with kids#none of us know how to handle this cuz they dont know when to even ask us to do#if there is anything
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𝐃𝐈𝐋𝐅 𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝐃𝐎𝐎𝐑 𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩
—in which toji is constantly fucking women and disturbing your peace. your complaints lead to you becoming one of them.
pairing: toji fushiguro x fem! college reader
cw: smut, breeding, daddy kink, size kink, age gap, toji being a cocky prick, unsafe sex, ass slapping, mentions of cervix touching
Ever since you heard about your next door neighbor Mr. Fushiguro going through a divorce, things have been hell. For you.
From the day he first moved into the apartment, constantly arguing on the phone with his ex wife about whose turn it was to watch his son, Megumi.
When Megumi is over, everything’s quiet, and you finally get a chance to rest your head and relax in peace. Doing some studying and cleaning in the quiet atmosphere.
You wished the black haired boy would stay for just a day longer, because Toji is back to his usual self hours later. Bringing in young college girls one after the other. Fucking them hard against his headboard as they let out loud cries of daddy. It was annoying. You could even stay inside anymore to get work done.
At every hour of the day he seemed to be active, fucking through all sorts of women, the shaking of your thin bedroom wall never coming to an end as high pitched moans echoed through.
It was getting to the point where you couldn’t take it. You were so fed up. Didn’t he ever get tired? Tired of promising these young desperate girls to call them back only to throw away their numbers and fuck their friends the next day.
Weeks go by and nothing changes, Megumi coming over for a silent three days then leaving again. Giving his father enough time to fuck any feelings for his ex wife out of his system.
You swore you couldn’t take it, you had barely been able to study, occasionally spending an hour or two in a nearby café between classes. When you noticed your grades slipping, your eyes having prominent bags at the lack of sleep, you groan loudly in frustration. Finding your legs moving before you could even process it.
Your fist raising to knock on the man’s door once, then twice, with no answer. You huffed, going in to knock a third time before the door swung open. A tall, muscular man towering over you with a scowl. “What?”
Your eyes widened as you scanned over his body, his perfectly sculpted face, broad shoulders, defined abs, and the very distinct outline in his sweats.
The man cleared his throat, a smirk gracing his face when he startled you out of your intense drooling. “Now, what do we have here?” he chuckled deeply, tilting his head to the side with crossed arms as he rested against the door’s frame. “Here to get your turn doll?”
You gulped, finding it harder to spit out your words as the Fushiguro man stared you down. “I.. I’m here to ask you to keep the noise down, some people have actual work to do.”
Toji whistled, “Oh? A bold one huh? I like it,” His hand reaching under your chin to make you look fully up at him. “you’re a pretty little thing you know,” he spoke, running his thumb along your bottom lip, “wonder what you’d look like ruined underneath me.”
You ignored the flutter that went off in your pussy, clenching your thighs discreetly as you glared. “Just keep the noise down okay old man? I'm trying to study.”
Toji could feel his cock grow harder, you were just what he needed. “So i’m an old man now? That’s a first, usually girls like you just call me daddy.” he shrugged, “but it’s okay, you’ll get there.”
You rolled your eyes as you walked away from him, annoyance written all over your face to mask the arousal swirling in your stomach. He’d probably fucked the entire neighborhood by now, including the campus, so you weren’t gonna fall for his sick charms. You just hoped he complied and kept the place quiet, you didn’t need that usual noise the day before your big test.
Toji had surprisingly did as you asked, and you sighed in content as you read through the pages of your notes. Your pen in your hand finding itself in between your teeth as you bit down softly. You got what you wanted, so why was your mind running wild with thoughts of the Fushiguro man’s hands on your body as he fucked you like all of those other girls.
You shifted in your seat, one leg over the other to bring stimulation to your needy clit making you whimper softly. You couldn’t let yourself give in.
Another week passed and you once again found yourself in the same noisy predicament. Your mind couldn’t help but wander to the man more than twice your age. Way too old for you yet just so.. hot. Toji Fushiguro had become your fantasy.
And it was unbearable.
Hearing all these moans day and night. Hearing Toji’s loud grunts and groans as he no doubt left them with the best fuck of their lives.
It was Thursday, and Megumi would be coming tomorrow per routine, so you’d finally get a break then. But, you couldn’t deny the fact that you wanted an excuse to go over there. Your face serious as you banged on his door.
You waited a minute, a shirtless Toji emerging into the door frame as it flew open. Toji smirked, “Ah, you again.” His sweatpants hung dangerously low beneath the start of his v line, black hair messy as his tongue darted out to swipe across his lips. “Finally came to your senses?”
His last fuck had left right before you came, coincidentally of course.
“N-no.” you objected sternly. “I’m here to ask you again to just be.. what are yo-“
You swallowed hard when he began stalking towards you, a sinister grin on his face as you were backed up against a wall. His breath fanned your head as he bent his neck. Hands on the walls near each side of your face. “Your face says otherwise, doll.”
“No it d-doesn’t.. you’re just a cocky old man preventing me from getting things done.”
Toji’s brow raised with a deep hearty chuckle, “Back to that nickname i see,” His hand grabbing hold of your cheeks and squeezing them together. “Gonna have to clean that mouth of yours, teach you how to be a good girl.”
You whimpered lowly, feeling wetness pool between your legs as you looked up through your lashes. Toji’s eyes trailing to your glossy lips as he inhaled sharply. “Don’t worry, this dirty old man’s lips are clean”
Pressing his lips roughly to yours, your eyes widening as you gripped the edge of your skirt with a moan. Toji smirked against your lips, his hands hooking beneath your legs as he lifted you up. Your frame so much smaller in comparison to his larger one.
Toji was quick to bring you inside. And you found yourself sitting on the man’s lap, your skirt bunched up at your hips as he hammered up into your wet cunt with brute force. His hands kneading into the flesh of your ass each time you ground your hips onto him.
You let out a loud mewl, his thick cock stretching you out and grazing against your gummy walls as he fucked you deep. Feeling him within your stomach when you cried out. “Fushiguro-san— ah, so- ngh g-ood.”
“That’s not my name doll, try again.” he growled deeply, landing his palm onto your ass in a hard slap. And you whimpered tearfully at the sting. “T-toji—” Another harsh smack burning through your flesh making you let out a cry. “Last chance.”
You moaned loudly, your back arching as Toji slammed into you. “D-daddy, ahh daddy, o-oh fuckk—,”
Toji hummed in satisfaction, “Look at you, thought i was a dirty old man hmm?” His teeth biting softly at the delicate skin of your neck, his pelvis hitting your red puffy folds relentlessly. “Moaning for me like a little slut, so fucking pretty.”
You let out a shaky cry, “Haah— F-fushiguro-san,” Your pussy clenched down on his girth, his rough hand making its way around your throat, squeezing the sides and forcing you to look at him. “Not gonna fucking tell you again.”
You mewled, “‘M sorry— nngh,” Your back arching when Toji bullied his cock deeper into you.
“Still waiting doll.” he grunted, eyes dark as his grip on your throat tightened, your moans and whimpers loud as his thighs noisily met your sticky cunt. “D-addy— ahh- so good,” you cried, feeling his angry tip forcing its way to your cervix, kissing the entrance with each harsh thrust.
“Good fucking girl, you’re getting there” he grinned with a groan. A creamy ring formed around the base of his cock, your pussy gushing messily onto him as loud squelching sounds filled the room. “Pussy’s so fucking tight— better be on the pill cause i’m botta cum in that pretty pussy, shit.”
“Ah— nngh daddy, ‘m close- gonna cum.” you whimpered, your eyes rolling back and your lips parting in a string of incoherent babbles, Toji’s thrusts sloppy as he groaned.
“Gonna cum on this old man’s dick yeah?” He teased cockily, “Had so much talk for someone who’s falling apart on my cock.” Toji grunted, “Bet ya sat there listening like a lil perv, your hand down your panties hmm?”
You shook your head no with a cry, “Uh uh- ahh— wasn’t.”
“Sure about that? Sure you didn’t sit there and fantasize about me fucking you like a little slut?” His hand reached down to rub at your clit, a loud moan escaping your mouth.
Your breathing sped up as you felt a coil buildup in your stomach. Your body shaking with pure ecstasy. You let out a high pitched scream, the stimulation to your g spot making your head go fuzzy. Vision turning white as you clenched down tightly on Toji’s cock.
“O-oh fuck— ‘m cumming— ah, cumming daddy.” Toji’s hand pressed down harder on your throat, the pressure restricting your air flow making you let out a choked mewl. Tears welling in your eyes as his heavy balls smacked against your ass.
“Nngh—” The ring of white thickened at his base as you let out whiny cries. Toji’s hand working small circles on the sensitive bud before he brought his lips to your ear. His voice deep and gruff as he groaned. “Fuck doll- squeezing me so tight, come on and scream for me.” He breathed, “make a mess on my cock.”
Toji’s mean pace became too much, a tight pull in your stomach as your mouth fell open, legs trembling with loud cries as an unfamiliar feeling washed over you.
It was heavenly, your brain going dumb and your pupils disappearing behind heavy lids as you screamed loudly, head falling back and nails digging into his shoulders as you fell off the edge.
Toji never slowing the movement of his hips, still hammering up into you despite the mess you were making on his thighs. Your pussy spraying streams after streams of clear liquid as you arched your hips, grinding back and forth to ride out your squirting orgasm.
“Even fucking louder than any of my previous fucks.” he laughed, “Wonder what the neighbors would say, went from being a whiny little bitch to being the same thing you complained about.”
You let out a whine, Toji flipping you abruptly onto your back, his hand still around your neck as the position allowing him to hit even deeper. “Fuck,” he grunted, his words in between each thrust. “gonna fucking breed that pussy so deep.” Letting out a low groan at the last thrust, his lips meeting yours in a sloppy kiss as he bottomed out.
A whimper fell past your lips into his when you felt him fill you up, his cum shooting in hot thick spurts along the walls of your cunt.
He smirked as he pulled away, watching you pant heavily. “Would make such a good breeding bunny.” Dipping his fingers past your lips and resting them on the back of your tongue. “Might have to keep you around, can’t be disturbed if you’re the one making the noise now can you?”
You shook your head tiredly, forcing your eyes to stay open as Toji pulled out of you. His sticky cum seeping out of your fluttering pussy slowly. Your brain was still so clouded, blinking in and out of blurry vision.
Toji hid the smile threatening to creep up onto his face, his face neutral as he plopped down onto the couch next to you. “Rest if you need to, then leave.” He said nonchalantly, trying to seem like his usual self despite the fact that he had not kicked you out yet. Which was something he never did, let a girl stay any longer than a second after sex.
The man would never admit it, but there was just something about you.
He wanted to make you his pretty little doll.
#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk#jjk x reader smut#toji x reader smut#toji smut#toji x reader#toji fushiguro#toji x you#jujutsu toji#jjk toji#toji fushigro x reader#toji fushiguro smut
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Apparently one of my new year's resolutions is to stop putting Faz in the bath so maybe I'll pivot and write Faz fanfics under the "foursome F/F/F/M" tag on AO3
#Fast forward to next year when I'm told to stop writing about faz and his three wives#he's rostered them all to cook dinner twice a week and then on Sundays he ubereats pizza for them all#lets them take it in turns to pick the movie every night#The third wife keeps picking encanto and the other two wives plot to get Faz to divorce her#I'm joking the third wife is still watching mean girls on repeat#The third wife picks the all four hunger Games movies#five including the prequel#faz navigates life when all his wives get on the same cycle#he falls in that cycle as well#one of them has synced their period to their 67 year old boss so she's even moodier that week#her nights of cooking are just baked beans on toast#all women compete with each other who can get pregnant fastest#'ladies it's okay you can all have a baby we have a four bedroom house'#'fivesome F/F/F/F/M' when Mel joins the group#me and Shae and the other one are all at the wedding of Faz and Mel just plotting Mel's death#finally all in agreeance for once#I'm so sorry
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#negativity cw#my parents’ anniversary is next week and they are not getting anything other than a 1 line ‘congrats’ in the whatsapp group chat#no gift no party no surprise trip no nothing#I’m the eldest child and now earning so I’m half certain they’ll side-eye me for not doing anything#idfc#it might seem petty and childish but after the Dec 2022 fights with my mom#where for two days in a row she screamed at me for hours#about how I was responsible for their marriage being on the rocks and verge of divorce#as well as a host of other fucked up things#on top of similar such threats/emotional blackmail every year since I was 13#I am never doing anything again to celebrate their Union#I still get them bday gifts and Father’s Day/Mother’s Day stuff#we still have a good relationship (ik it seems odd but despite everything we do)#but you don’t get to spend a decade blaming me for your adult inability to maintain your adult relationship#and expect me to celebrate it once I’m an adult#also my mom has repeatedly and very candidly refused to apologize for any of the above so this isn’t a case of#silently fuming and childishly refusing to communicate
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#playing the Sims in the living room while my parents argue in their room#I can't stand them#i wish they got divorced but at the same time they are both insufferable so I'd rather stay at my home every day of the week#i mean my f*ther brought it up in the start of the summer and it only went downhill from there#i can't even take anyone's side bc they both suck#she keeps starting fights without any reason#and he is a shity dad#but it isn't his fault entirely#and i know that I'm the problem#every time i try to make them stop fighting she always tells me about something he did (or didn't do actually) that has to do with me#he didn't feed me when i was little and there was something not normal neurological with me#and she got mad at him#then i was in need of support in school and he didn't want me to get it so i could be normal#and now i said that i wasn't well mentally#he tried to avoid reality by going to the computer and forgot to go pick up my sister#and they fought so badly i had to cover my ears#and all the the things she hates about him are the exact same characteristics i have#she will never admit it but it's true#and there are a million other things that's my fault it's not worth mentioning up#every pivotal negative moment in their relationship is almost always my fault#i thought that i would be a good parent but I'm no longer sure#cw divorce#idk i don't want anyone to get triggered bc i like to scream into the void
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ExHusband!Simon x Reader
You Want a Divorce? (One)
Note: I'm having the WORST writer's block now so pls excuse my lack of proper writing... I'm currently sitting in front of a beach writing in hopes that ill gain inspo
CW: Angst, mentions of sex, jealous/possessive Simon, PLS DONT LEAVE YOUR KIDS IN THE CAR !!! Or break into someone’s house
Inspired by: Ex!Husband Simon
PART TWO
Simon stared at you. The shades of his eyes simmering into endless voids of obsidian, blonde lashes moulded against his greased lids, the residue of the perpetual torture his body had succumbed to during deployment.
“You want a divorce?” He spoke, voice deep as he flickered between your shaking heads, sweat soiling into the papers gripped firmly and your swollen face, cheeks feverish with a red hue, eyes even more so.
You held back a rough sob, throat stripped of all moisture evident in your hoarse voice as you spoke, “Yes, Simon. I think it would be best for our family… for us.”
He scoffed. “You think the best thing for our family is to separate?”
“We already pretty much are. You’re away for days, weeks, months at a time. We’re hardly a family and it’s difficult to explain to the children why I’m crying.”
“Ok then.”
That was it. You would admit, it stung. His lacklustre tone felt like a stab in the gut, the blade drenched with anthrax as it reared blistering sores internally, the effects having shown through your putrid complexion. Your skin was dull, practically lifeless, the only living form of you grew day by day through the darkening of eyebags that almost made you look apocalyptic.
It had been 12 months of separation, officially 8 being legally divorced. You kept his last name, the permanent burn of hearing Mrs Riley still searing through you with every syllable, yet you feel it would only hurt you more if they said Ms.
Simon was often away now, and the minimal family time he used to get felt pointless as the shabby apartment he moved into after the sudden interference of your mind-boggling news barely fit the two kids you shared. His body felt more relentless on him, the taunting of his mind fulgurated the inoperative reality that he would come home to you, to his family.
His voice, almost like it dropped an octave had grown richer in aggression, tormenting those he deemed suitable, both with his tongue and with his bruised knuckles, an oil painting of blue and purple hues radiating across the pale flesh as he shrugged it off to his team as “pushing himself and others to do better”.
Couldn’t you realise your mistake? Wouldn’t you prefer crying in his arms about his absence than never having it fulfilled again?
As he looked around the bleak environment, tan stained walls revolting the creaking mattress he had brought someone home to, someone who wasn’t you. It made him feel sick like a viral infection had slunk its way into his bloodstream as he laid next to a woman that failed to make his cock throb, endless images of you sprawled out under him flickering. No wonder he called out your name instead.
You felt the familiar shake of your hands every time your phone dinged; Simon’s dreary tone was evident through his dry “On the way” text. You ushered a day of your children’s life into their cartoon-themed backpacks, innocent smiles adorning their skin, doe-like eyes of brown, far too familiar to Simon’s staring up at you.
The sound of his car scraping into your paved driveway almost made you feel like throwing up, the nerves of seeing him combined with the already present pit of anxiety due to your date later turning you into one big shaky mess as you brushed it off as “too much caffeine”.
The echo of his car door slamming shut rung through your ears, staining you with the reiteration that your ex-husband was now at your door, heavy fists knocking upon the wood. The image you saw of him in your mind morphed back to reality as you stared at him, a blank expression on your face.
“Hi, love.”
“Hi, Simon.”
Your frown was clear, the pet name you were so used to becoming a distant memory in the past few months. It was a hole you were attempting to fill, to clear yourself away from his teasing tongue and faux impression of a healthy relationship. You were divorced for a reason, you knew that, but as you gazed upon the lack of life in his skin, it was almost like he was holding a mirror up to you.
“Daddy!” You watched as your 5-year-old, Ella, practically leapt into his hefty frame, his hands coiling around her like second nature. You could feel his warmth, the heat that would build in your stomach when you felt those same digits touch you.
“Hi sweetheart,” his voice gruff, yet tone lighter as he placed a delicate kiss on the skin of her forehead, “You miss me?”
She nodded, her face buried in the hem of his neck as your other child cooed from the bouncy chair, tubby legs attempting to wheel himself to the door.
“There’s my boy,” Simon practically cooed as he placed Ella down, bounding inside as he lifted the toddler out, grabby arms reaching out to pull at Simon’s locks, gentle tugs causing you to laugh.
Your voice cut through the scene like glass. Why would you want to destroy such a happy moment? Weren’t you supposed to be reuniting? Just say it, tell Simon you want him to come home, that you need him.
“This is Ella’s bag,” you speak, holding up the pink Minnie Mouse bag, “And this is Toby’s.” Your son giggled as he muffled out the words, “Transformers”.
Simon nodded, “Are you doing anything tonight?”
Ella practically screeched, “Mummy’s going on a date!” The thrill of her laughter that followed only seemed to make the situation more awkward.
“A date?” Simon’s voice was deadly, the hair raising on your arms as you shook your head, a tight smile on your suddenly dry lips.
“No, no, nothing like that. Just catching up with an old colleague of mine.”
“But he’s a boy, Mummy,” Ella giggled. Who was raising your daughter to be such a big mouth? Your face formed an annoyed look, eyebrows raising as a line of wrinkles crinkled against your forehead, your pointer fingers massaging your temples.
“An old colleague?” Simon practically gasped. Had he met him at your old work Xmas parties?
“Let’s get you guys in the car.” You fumbled with Toby’s car seat as you strapped him in, your nimble fingers shaking with anxiety before you shut the door, pressing a kiss against the window before wiping away the minimal residue of dirt. Gross.
“Who is he?” His tone was acerbic like he was looking for an argument. How dare you try and replace him? He was your husband, the father of your two kids? Have you seen this random man before? Had he fucked you?
“God, Simon-“
“Who is he?” Simon was relentless, bullying his way into getting the answers as his arms folded across his chest, tattoos practically screaming at you too.
“His name’s Andrew. I ran into him at a coffee shop a few weeks back and he just wanted to catch up. That’s it.”
A loud scoff sounded in the air. “You mean that geezer from that corporate job you hated? The one who didn’t know it was weird to blatantly stare down your dress when you were standing next to your fucking husband?”
“He didn’t stare down my dress! You’re not my husband anymore, Simon. I can see who I want.”
“I don’t want our children to grow up thinking they have multiple dads.”
You’ll admit, that stung.
“Multiple dads? You’re out of your mind. The only reason they would ever believe they have multiple dads is if their real one stopped showing up. And where have you been, Simon? When have you shown up?”
Simon held his tongue, the warmth of the metallic taste gashing through his teeth as he practically snarled past you. “I’ll bring them back tomorrow.”
The dress you wore was practically suffocating you as you tucked your stomach in. Simon never minded the change in your figure after motherhood, he found himself liking it even more. He loved knowing that his seed put you through that, that he made you swell with his children, and he brought out the glow in your cheeks and the delicate stretch marks that laced your hips.
Andrew was nice. His tone was comforting as he walked to your door, ushering you to his car as he insisted you could order whatever you wanted. He was handsome, the salt and pepper hues of his hair settling your insecurity.
“We’ll take the Pinot Noir,” he spoke, looking at you with an almost arrogant sheer in his blue eyes. You only liked white. Simon knew that just like he knew everything about y-
You’re not with Simon anymore. You had to realise that. Maybe that’s why you brought Andrew home, let him shove his cock (that was a lot smaller than what you were used to) inside your heat, as you let out moans you had mimicked from the porn you watched with the actor that resembled far too much of your ex-husband.
Simon's fingers gripped the steering wheel early the next morning, your two children snuggled up in the backseat as he drove back to his old house, your old home. He wasn’t a man who gave up easy, he would show you, prove to you that you made a mistake. You needed each other.
Hold on. You don’t drive a red car?
His car lurched into the entrance of your home, nearly ramming into the garage as he shoved it in park, rolling down the two back windows slightly for air as he dug around in the small side compartment of his car.
The familiar gold key he had stolen from you the night he packed up all his stuff stared back at him, practically egging him on. Go on Simon, march in there. So he did. His hand rattled against the door knob, glancing back to peak into the car for a second before he slammed the door shut.
Your body froze. Were you being robbed? No. It was only Simon. A very angry-looking Simon. You stood, the white sheet barely shielding your naked body as he took in the sight of the man next to you, his hands wrapping around his shoulders as he practically ripped him out of bed, flinging him onto the floor as he grunted, eyes reared with hatred.
“Simon, what the fuck are you doing? WHERE ARE THE KIDS?”
Andrew groaned, on the floor, covering his groin as Simon chucked the masculine clothes at his head, the thin boxers soiled across the man’s scalp as he trembled.
“Our kids are asleep in the car, waiting for their Mummy to come to the zoo with them.” Simon’s words were despicable, laced with an acrimonious tone, small particles of spit seething through his lips as stared at you.
He turned to the man, a giant frame staggering over the top of him. “Get the fuck out, and if you wake up our kids when you go past, I will personally put a bullet straight in the middle of your skull,” he said, pushing a thick digit against his forehead as Andrew rushed out, clothes barely on before you felt the front door shut, a cry of apologises leaving your lips as you tried to assist him but Simon only held you back, a tight grip coiling around your arm.
“What the fuck was that? How’d you get in?” You couldn’t even place the words to say, humiliation roaring through you as you snuggled the sheet closer to you, away from his peering eyes.
“It’s time to be a family again, don’t you think love?”
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