#they are so unbelievably special to me
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Watching hopel scenes at 2am and crying blood sweat and tears
#id talk about them in the tags but I genuinely can’t#I need season 5 I need them I need them I need them#they are so unbelievably special to me#season 2 beloved because of their scenes#that is THEIR SEASON#he protected her and did what he could to keep her safe#and he loves her a disgusting amount im gonna vomit#that’s her FATHER#THEYRE A FAMILY 😭🤮🤮😭😭😭🤮😭🤮😭🤮🤮😭#MY FAMILY#no I’m not ok#my neck is soaked in tears and my head hurts#stranger things#jim hopper#jane hopper
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Holy fucking shit my quote made it into the video, I'm shaking rn.
#had to pause the video and run around the room screeching for a second#i love the incorrect quotes videos so much#sanders sides#sanders sides incorrect quotes#this series is seriously so special to me this made me so unbelievably happy
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forgive me father for i have made memes again
#nhl#nhl memes#hockey textposts#mason marchment#jake oettinger#cole caufield#alex turcotte#trevor zegras#jack hughes#clayton keller#logan cooley#my first meme of these two i think#joel farabee#scott laughton#joel is so unbelievably special to me#and really just special in general#brock boeser#elias pettersson#brad marchand#patrice bergeron#jamie drysdale#owen power#kent johnson#i will somehow make you all as obsessed with them as i am#chris kreider#mika zibanejad#my favorite gay bfs
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I forgot to make a post about this last week (or maybe I needed time to process what I saw), but addressing my fellow Tolkien fans out there: Did anyone else feel the urge to scoop their own eyes out with a spoon after the whole 'sympathetic and misunderstood orcs who just want to stay with their families and don't want to go to war' debacle?
Misunderstood orcs. Misunderstood. Orcs. Who don't want to go to war. ORCS. They actually showed an orc baby being held by its orc parent.
Once again... ORCS.
I am so glad Christopher Tolkien died in 2020.
#anti rings of power#anti trop#ropgarbage#my GOD#I mean#every time I think to myself:#'ok this is it... they can't possibly get any worse'#the rings of power somehow manages?#I mean... it IS impressive in a way#but MY. GOD.#and there are still people out there#who defend this show's writing#and they do it in a VERY weird way#it's truly unbelievable.#like once I criticised the writing in a website that shall not be named#and I was ranting about the way they portrayed one of my fav characters: galadriel#and how they changed everything that made her so special in the lore#and they called me racist#.... because I said they butchered galadriel's character#OK.#what I'm hearing from this is#you actually KNOW the writing sucks#but calling people names is easier... and a cope
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✨🖤 Family Portrait 🖤 @grimreapersbutt 🖤✨
And it was hard, but you were brave, you are splendid And we will never be alone in this world No matter what they say We're going to be okay We were safe inside And our new son cried
Commission Info | Ko-Fi | My Links
#heheheheh my late mother's day gift to miss iris!!#of her and her darling cybill and their family!! 💖🥹💖#everyone better say hi to june and lil baby henry or I will explode!!!!#they are so so sosososo special to me and I've been wanting to draw this forever so I AM going to be unbelievably annoying abt this one#sweeties my beloved sweeties my loves my darlings waaaaahhh#everyone is legally obligated to look at them at all times idc#how can u not adore them they literally INVENTED love#they INVENTED making out sloppy style and fucking raw#if u need me I'm gonna go astral project into the sun now#barking barking bitint growling shaking the bars of my cage gnawing gnawing gnawing ripping out the drywall and eating it#LOOK AT OUR SWEET BABIESSSSSS THEY ARE EVERY THEY ARE THE MOMENT I'M GONNA CRYYYYYY#can u tell I'm happy to be home#and drawing again for the first time in weeks#sighs dreamily#cybill x iris#my art#fallout#sole survivor#friend oc
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I've been holding it in but god I've decided to relisten to Taz: Suffering Game and Reunion tour after getting the graphic novel and god, the amount of titular moments they cut are just devastating, like some of them I get, but god, they should have just made them 2 seperate books, the fact they cut 2 of my absolute favorite scenes, scenes that still hit me today relistening the same way they did when I was 13, listening to this story for the first time, really hurts, they removed the whole argument in Fantasy Costco over Magnus returning to his body, the "those are the arms that have held my wife" that scene made me cry when I first heard it, and it makes me cry now, and I'm not sure if that's because it hurts, or because knowing the loss of such a beautiful story in adaptation, they should have made them 2 seperate books, I don't care if I have to pay extra for another book, I just wanted this story I love so much to feel right, and im terrified for the next book, what's the point of adapting this story if its at the cost of what makes it beautiful
#the adventure zone#the adventure zone graphic novel#taz graphic novel#taz balance#taz reunion tour#taz graphic novel spoilers#god it makes me so unbelievably mad im actually so upset#this is also like my actual extreme special interest#it came into my life at such a tumultuous time and its so unbelievably important to me#its also 3am so maybe thats particularly why im so upset but goddamn i need a hug rn#might delete later#depending on the reception from yall
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just saw someone posted this on twitter erm. theyre so scary
#thru investigating it seems like this and the wells fargo arena next door are like Connected so. very much giving tour teaser vibes still#but also its a convention center so maybe it could end up being smthin like the mania experience IDK!!!!!!!!!!#fob makes me feel such a special type of anxiety it is unbelievable i need it to be tomorrow now so i can Know#txt#fob#p: 100
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Chapter Thirty (Part 2)
“Fucking hell,” He twists away and grabs the front of his hair. The rain has eased to a mist now but the clouds still shield the sky and block the light out like an early dusk. His limbs become a bit stilted and stiff as though he’s forgotten how to control them. “Fuck,” he says hoarsely, and he drops onto the wet sand and shoves the heels of his hands into the sockets of his eyes “This is it then, isn’t it? Things are over with us.”
I hesitate for a moment before sitting next to him, and the seat of my dress immediately soaks through and I don’t care about it. “Yeah,” I say gently, “They have to be, don’t they?”
“There’s nothing I can do.”
“I want you to go and be happy.”
He lets out an agonised, strangled noise, and it takes me a second to realise that he has begun to sob into his hands, and it’s the strangest thing, but I think I can feel my heart physically breaking inside my chest, tearing apart, ripping right down the centre. I didn’t know that when people spoke about heartbreak that this is what they meant all along. The ache inside me feels unbearable, and I want so badly to reach for him and tell him that I don’t mean any of it, and yes, I’ll take that Green Card and yes, I’ll come and live in Los Angeles, but instead I cram my wrist to my nose and I cry with him because it seems like the only sensible thing I can do.
And once I’ve started I cannot stop, and the tears come, and they come, and they fill my eyes until I can’t see a thing but the greys and blues of the sea blurring together like watercolour bleeding down the page, and then I wipe them and I look to my right where Jude’s head is bowed and his shoulders are shaking, and I tell him that I’m sorry. He says something I can’t understand because he is crying too hard, but I don’t know that it really matters what it was, because on some level I know what he’s saying. Just like I do, he simply hurts.
He sniffs and drags the heel of his hand up across his nose. He shakes his head as tears roll off the end of his spiky lashes, “God,” He says eventually, “I just really thought- I think I took it for granted that I’d get to be with you forever, or something, like we were perpetual-” and he bares his teeth and heaves a shuddering sigh into his lungs, eyes fixed on his feet, embarrassed, like he can’t bear to look at me and see what I think of him crying on the ground. “I wanted everything,” he chokes out, “All of the stupid stuff, you know? Christmases and New Years, I wanted to get you birthday presents and anniversary presents and travel with you and just- just wake up with you and make you breakfast and-” he squeezes his eyes shut, “But like, I can’t have any of it and now I just have to live without you, and it’s so horrible-”
I comb my fingers through the back of his hair and I whisper, again, that I’m sorry.
“I love you,” He says, though he knows that it’s not enough, and I know it too, because loving Jude Turner is like loving a memory, the dream, the idea of a man that my seventeen year old self believed would solve me, would prove that I am worthy of happiness only because he loves me back. And perhaps it’s an idea that he loves too, a girl who would make him feel young and careless and reckless, who would expect nothing, ask nothing from him but to be free.
I swipe at my damp cheek, “Yeah but one day you won’t. Someday when I’m long gone you’ll look back on this time and you’ll think about how glad you were that you never compromised or let yourself be held back by some girl. And then-” I sniffle, “-when you’re living this amazing life, and you’re happy and you’re successful and surrounded by people who love you you’ll think ‘oh yeah, her, God, you know, I don’t even remember what her name was anymore.’”
“No,” he shakes his head firmly, “No, I’m going to love you for my whole life.”
And then I make the loneliest sound I’ve ever made, somewhere between a gasp and a sob as I relent and throw myself into his chest so that I can let him hold me. He kisses my hair so gently and rests his cheek upon my head and says simply, “I’ll miss you.”
“And I’ll miss you,” I reply, “And don’t think I’ll ever forget you either. You know that you’re going to be everywhere, you’ll be the ghost that follows me around. Every time I wake up and you aren’t there, or get home and you aren’t waiting at the door, and every time my feet touch this coastline, and I get into the sea, or see the roof of that beach house poking over the dunes I’ll think, you know, I really wish he was here, because everything I did was better when he did it with me,” I exhale thickly, “But then I’ll think of you somewhere else in the world where I know that you’ll be happy and I’ll just be happy to, because I want that for you, I really do, even if I don’t get to be a part of it.”
There’s a long pause while we cry together, and he reaches down to brush fresh tears from my cheekbones, “I feel lucky to have known you when I did,” He says, “When I- When I go to LA, you know, I doubt I’ll be back again for a very long time, and- God, -and by then who knows where your talent will have taken you and what you’ll be doing. To know you now feels like the greatest privilege, and I know that you’re telling yourself that I won’t remember you years from now, but actually I’ll be saying, yeah, I knew that girl once and she was incredible, I caught her in a moment in time and you should have seen her, when talent just radiated off her like the heat from a sunburn and she didn’t even know it yet.”
I turn to face him and look him dead in the eyes, because I don’t know the next time I’ll get to really look at them, “You’ll be happy,” I insist. If I mean it I can make it so.
“You too,” He says , “And maybe when we both are we’ll find our way back to each other again.”
“Yeah, I hope so,” I say, and in that moment the sun finally breaks through the clouds, just a sliver of it, and it hits the side of his beautiful face, glows on his cheek and his hair and through his brown eyes to turn them golden, the colour and warmth of flames.
That’s how I’ll always remember him.
And when our story is over and the edges of the clouds turn pink and amber, I get up to walk away. I turn to look at him one more time though I can hardly bear to. Standing there in the sunlight he simply raises his hand. “I’ll see you, Evie,” He says.
“Yes,” I say, “someday.”
THE END To my Tumblr readers, thank you so much for reading along. It's been a pleasure to share this story with you.
For a very long time I knew that I wanted to tell a story like this. I felt like I had so many things to say, about growing up, about this country, about the way it feels to inhabit it, how it felt to be young and bored with no money to spend during the recession era – the uniqueness of that particular moment in time and the feelings, places and people that have changed in the years since, but I just never got around to it.
One evening in July of 2022 my mother, who has become an avid wild swimmer since her retirement, took me down to the beach to take a dip in the sea. It’s a beach I’ve been on a thousand times having grown up just a few kilometers away from it. I’d swum in it, walked it, even worked on it for three summers during my early twenties but for some reason on that day I felt overwhelmingly nostalgic about it. This is not a very exciting beach, I thought, but isn’t it a bit beautiful in it’s own way. From my place, neck deep in the water I looked at the way the marram grass shimmered in the wind and bits of old fishing nets and driftwood littered the coarse sand. A line of identical holiday homes peeped up over a low stone wall, and a little corrugated iron summer house sat right in the middle of the dunes, flat roof, wooden deck. I’ve always wondered who owned it.
Later on I got home and typed a few paragraphs of a story on my computer. I hadn’t written a thing in years. Then I just didn’t stop.
I’d spent the entire pandemic overanalysing my teenage traumas, reliving the things I’d done in college and into the first years of my twenties. A lot of weird things happened to me. Very dramatic things, honestly. I think I am the sort of person that draws highly erratic types to me or perhaps is just inclined to stir up emotionally intense situations, and as a result my life had felt like a whirlwind, some sort of strange carousel until I was forced to step off it in 2020. There’s no point getting into it, really. You’ve read Lucky Girl, so you get the gist.
I have to say thank you to my wonderful friends for being my biggest cheerleaders during this process. They hyped me up and listened to my every thought, proof read, problem solved and helped me to understand that it’s not embarrassing to do this, in fact it’s actually pretty cool to publish a story in this way. Grace & Sarah, thanks for letting me borrow from your lives as much as I borrowed from my own, and for talking in circles with me about everything and anything that came into our heads. I love you to bits ❤
Also to my partner, who never read this story, but tells his friends that his girlfriend wrote a book!! Who brought me tea and cooked me food while I was in a whirlwind of inspiration. He really just wanted me to come into the living room so that we could watch Succession, or White Lotus, or X Files, or whatever else we were binging during the last 15 months, but he never complained. “Ah, sims.” He’d say, and shut the office door.
To my first love and my teenage friends, who I think of all the time. Who embodied a time and a space that I’ll never inhabit again, but I’ll never forget any of it. I remember all of the places or the people who were around me while I lived out the end of my childhood, and when I revisit the places we used to go there are a thousand tiny snapshots of memory everywhere. Of these teenagers that don’t exist anymore, who are all entering their thirties now, of the time we had, the person I used to be and the inexplicable importance of those few short years. Nowadays when I’m there, on those beaches and in those woods I swear it’s like there’s a ghost there with me, and it’s me, the person I used to be. I’m reminded of the incredible distance I’ve come since fifteen.
To my readers most of all, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You really kept me going when it got tough and when it all felt too close to the bone, and I was a bit too freaked out to write. Your comments made this story such a wonderful experience and I’m so glad that I got to share it with you all. I still kind of can’t believe that so many people have read this thing – it’s bizarre. I really didn’t think a single person would care, but here we are. You’re all angels.
All my love,
Hannah.
Beginning // Prev // Epilogue
#lucky girl part 3#it's over waaaaah#thank you all for reading along#this project was so unbelievably special and healing for me#i'm grateful for anyone who gave it time#now go read lucky boy!!!
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Update this is how my bag looks like now yipeee 🥳
Closer look onto the badgeeees \>∆</ !! (android camera quality is total ass so sorry if uc snt see much 3:)
(Uhh credits to the awesome tfota and soc artists for this amazing fansrts 🤯 idk theres like too many fansrts form diffrent artidt on this back so yh 🗣️ )
#six of crows#soc#crooked kingdom#jesper fahey#inej ghafa#kaz brekker#nina zenik#wylan van eck#matthias helvar#kanej#wesper#helnik#the cruel prince#the folk of the air#jude duarte#cardan greenbriar#madoc duarte (hes actually there if u squint a bit :3)#mindless self indulgence#<- i dont support msi bte judt their music is awesome sauce 🤯#this looks so unbelievably overwhelming ☹️ /pos#like not a single inch of the surface being seen oml 😭😭#anwyays it kinda took me liek two hours to do this but thats ookk#thank you so much six of crows and tfota artists#once again they serve with this delicious fanart!!!#i love this backpack it like brings character depth 😜#now everytimy i look at it i cna just see kanej doing eye contact and thats rlly special to me#ok bye
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Ah nectar, the drink of the Gods
Also known as potion of burn your fingers because you're bad at using lighters and refuse to turn your ceiling fan off
(Full process under the cut)
[Skull pauldron] [Belt] [Greaves] [Toga + sash] [Wig + Laurels] [Armbands] [Flaming feet] [Satyr Sack] [Stygius v1] [Stygius v2] [Nectar]
I really love being able to give out in-character items while in cosplay, and I figured nectar, as a semi-common friendship leveling item, would be perfect. Originally I was going to try sculpting them out of sculpy or something and then I realised I would be unsatisfied with the end result so I bought bought 50 tiny glass bottles off aliexpress
To get the golden-orange filling I experimented with a few things - while the one I was happiest with was a clear PVA glue mixed with watercolour paint pigment for colour and gold pearlescent pigment for shine, it wouldn't set, and I didn't want to deal with a liquid considering I have a long history of just bashing the shit out of things if I'm not very careful, and I don't want to spend my whole con day taking special care of tiny glass bottles. So, I ended up using resin! Coloured the same way as the glue, this was my first time using resin and while I would have liked less bubbles it turned out well
To get the weird blobby looking cork the ends were dipped in wax by my sister, who mixed a few colours together and let the bottles dry upside down to get the right shape
I used two types of ribbon for my two lots of bottles (nearly 100 bottles have been made up to this point), but both were a purple satin. After trying the bow in a way that would let it sit in the right direction and burning the ends with a lighter to seal them and prevent them from fraying, I used clear PVA glue to stiffen the ribbon and secure it. While drying I used a bit of blutack to get the ends to dry straight down rather than to the sides
Then, because small trinkets are nice but can be difficult to carry around all day at a con, I attached some string which is just purple embroidery thread I had lying around. Unfortunately I did too much of a good job tying the ribbon tightly for some of them since I had to use wire and pliers to actually get it under the ribbon to tie it on
But all the finicky work is worth it, they're very cute when complete
(Psst - if you're an Australian con-goer (specifically Supanova) keep an eye out for me on the floor - I give these out to the hades fans I meet!)
#my cosplay#cosplay process#hades game#zagreus cosplay#cosplay props#nectar#a few people have asked me why I don't sell these and why I go to so much effort and spend money on something I'm giving out for free#and the answer is because its fun it makes me happy and it makes the recipients happy#who cares if I'm 'losing money' when I can make someone's day#and still be in character to make my cosplay even better#I don't roleplay and I'm a shit actor but it's about having fun and making connections and keeping up that sense of community#bc we're choosing to be at the convention and be enthusiastic about the things we love#and that is so unbelievably special to me#anyway that's it for the tag rant and these damn process posts thanks to anyone that actually reads all this word vomit
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alecto carrow?
ALECTO!!!!
favorite thing about them
nasty & mean radfem dyke .. 🤍🤍
least favorite thing about them
that she's not my nasty & mean girlfriend 😞
brotp
alecto & barty (saint's version)
otp
alectolily........ 👩❤️💋👩
notp
i was gonna say alecto with any man but im not immune to the carrowcest propaganda i fear :/
song i associate with them
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Replayed Modern Warfare 3 2011 on Veteran tonight and goooooooood night. Blood Brothers never gets any easier to watch no matter how many times you've done it and the ending really never misses huh
I apologize for the amount of yapping in the tags I reread it all on mobile and started giggling because it went on for so long but eh. Blessed are those who won't shut the freak up and all that
#call of duty#modern warfare 3 2011#i just. wow. wow wow wow wow wow#i've played these three games so many times over the last several years and i just.#they literally. never get old.#loose ends and blood brothers will never not make me cry and endgame and dust to dust will never not make me smile so hard#ending it with price smoking the cigar like he did in the first mission in the first game wHEN HE FIRST MET SOAP JUST UGHHHHHH.#i know y'all don't care but i don't care that y'all don't care i could literally yap about this until i shrivel up and die#i have never ever ever in my LIFE seen poetic justice played out so beautifully like it is at the very end#JUST. WOW. WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. WOW WOW. WOW#they do not frickin make games like that anymore DADGUM#i also forgot how frickin sad down the rabbit hole is?? like jeez louise they didn't have much screen time but gosh#i also have never in my life heard such gut-wrenching anguish from a grown man in my life like price in that one scene#I KNOW Y'ALL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT MAN MAKES ME FULL ON S O B IN THAT PART HE HAD NO BUSINESS#anyway i'll keep cutely living in denial and pretending literally any of the main characters besides price and nikolai are fine <3#foley and dunn and their team seemed just fine at the end of modern warfare 2 so i will accept that small mercy#at this point these games have taken everything else i love away from me so#y'all probably think i'm wild for how insane i get over these games but the nostalgia bit is a big part of it as well#like they're honestly in my opinion genuinely the greatest video games of all time#but the fact that i have that connection with my dad makes it so special#crazy cause he said he also cried in blood brothers and my dad is 54 and i have seen him cry one (1) other time in my entire life#heck infinity ward but also bless them i hope the devs live long beautiful wonderful prosperous delightful exciting fulfilling lives#Lord bless them and their entire bloodline for the contributions they have made to humanity not even joking#AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FREAKING SOUNDTRACKS DO NOT GO THERE OAUSYDJAKAKDN#MW2 AND MW3 CREDITS. EXTRACTION POINT. COUP DE GRACE. RETREAT AND REVEILLE. CONTINGENCY. PARIS SIEGE. PRAGUE HOSTILITIES. RUSSIAN WARFARE.#UGHHHHHHHGHHHH everything about these games is so unbelievably perfect and immaculate#i have got to get over my art block NOWWWWWWWWWW#makarov is also the best villain i've ever seen idc bro he's frickin awesome#i mean obviously he's horrible and a disgustingly evil human being but as a character he's stupidly well-written
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just fully played tgogm. i still want to marry elias just like i thought i would
{spoilers in tags}
#he#him#elias gallagher#he is so#augh#i love him so much its unbelieveable#like duuuuuuuuuude hes so sweet im gonna get a sugar crash#tgogm#the groom of gallagher mansion#of course the first ending i got was polyamory :) love all around man#also with the zinnias i was like 'oh dip i love orange!'#then realized 'oh wait that probably meant taylor'#oh and!! the fact that the player could pick violets bouquet!! neatorino!#i should go back through everything with one of the special names#see if it does anything else different#i want to ballroom dance with elias#waltz or some shit {i only barely remember how to waltz}#and! flower language my beloved! he knows a lot more actual useful stuff than me lol#also taylor is the resident dork#i wanna bully him in a friendly way#and the fact the ending where you 'marry' taylor the player just. pulls him into two kisses#hilarious#shut up effective immediately lmao#OH I FORGOT TO ADD#elias fucking killed me AND taylor#if it was actually me i would've held a grudge far longer than being able to date them after like seven months#i am a bastard about grudges#he KILLED me#AND MY FRIEND!!!#also there is a secret for finishing the whole game
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Honestly my dreams are the best
#All hail hydroxyzine#First fifteen years of my life sleep was lowkeyhell and two lil green pills and I get bonus content for all my special interests every nigh#brilliant#last dream closed out with Kahmunrah halfway to insanity screeching “WHY ARE YOUR EVEN EYES BLUE-“ while ahk was like☕️🫤#And I laughed so hard I woke up#”everyone just LOVES you and your PERFECT holier than though face- oh GOD don’t you want to kill him??? Don’t you???”#Headcannon that Kahmunrah just finds ahkmenrahs unshakable commitment to unbothered-ness unbelievably infuriating#Murdering him didn’t even stop it he’s still like 😊#Yeah I do think about Rami Malek’s eyes a lot can you blame me. Can you possibly blame me. In any universe could you even remotely blame me
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Nico and Jason are so Pikachu and Mimikyu coded no I will not elaborate
#pjo#nico di angelo#jason grace#I disappeared for like 3 months now I’m back with this lmao get rekt#I didn’t mean that ily#I was Jk bbg#anyways#time to elaborate!#Jason is a son of Zeus yea lightning shop#he’s also a perfect little poster child#Nico is trying his best to fit in but still unbelievable different in an unmistakable way#also shadow powers and isolation whoooo#they’re so special to me and me alone#jasico
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It’s Halloween and I’m an elementary school teacher so pray for me
#I am not even attempting to teach today#we have a half day so specials will be 25 minutes#they have their parties and are just in general off the walls so we will be coloring#in later news tho I think my costume will go over well#my team is being inside out characters and I’m being anxiety#tm will be hell tho#day after Halloween on a Friday????#unbelievable#so pray for me more for tm I guess#personal#julianne speaks#happy halloween
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