#these traumatized boys are mine and I love them

[luna13e-blog]

Rosekiller. Not really any discernible TW but I suck at tagging

-----

Evan is throwing pebbles at the lake when he hears steps getting closer. He turns his head up with a grin to say hello to Barty, just for that grin to disappear instantly.

Barty looks down at him with that void expression that only could meant things with his father had went rough.

"Don't give me that look", Barty scowls.

Evan lowers his eyes in silence, looking at the rock in his hand instead, tracing the softened edges with the fingers of his other hand. Barty sits beside him, chin resting on his knees and arms around his legs.

Evan throws the pebble into the lake. One, two, three, four jumps before it sinks in the water. He makes a gesture with his hand and the pebble flies from the lake right into his palm. He waits for a comment, for Barty to say anything, but after a minute of silence he throws the pebble again. With force this time. The rock flies some meters and sinks in the water. Not bouncing once.

"Can I hug you?", Evan asks, still looking at the place where tiny waves mark where the pebble had sank.

"I don't need a hug", Barty replies defensively, looking as well to the circles in the water.

"Thing is", Evan moves his hand again, the pebble flying back to his hand as it has done before, "I'm not asking if you need one, I'm asking if I can".

"It's a free world, do whatever the fuck you want, Rosier."

Evan turns to look at the boy, who didn't look back at him. He frowns, biting his bottom lip. He weighs the options in his head. "I don't fancy trying to hug you just to be hexed, Crouch"

Barty turns to look at him, with a little frown in his forehead. "Do you want to hug me?"

"No, I'm just asking if I can do things I don't want to do", Evan shakes his head with half a smile. "Yes, I want to."

"...why?", Barty asks suspiciously.

"Because my hugs are amazing, you can ask Dorcas about it", he smiles with that cocky expression of his, "and I believe you deserve one."

"I don't deser-"

"Shut up, Crouch. I'm not asking your opinion on the matter. Not that whatever you say has ever make me changed my mind, has it?", he grins ignoring Barty's huffing. "So, can I?"

"Don't pretend for me to hug you back", Barty answers and that's all Evan needs to kneel and drag him to his chest with one arm.

It isn't sweet or tender. He squeezes hard, Barty's shoulder and his knee digging in him. Barty doesn't move, but he doesn't push him away either, so Evan takes it as a permission to wrap his other arm around him and cradle him into his chest. The position is awkward as Barty remains hugging his legs but he moves his head to hide it in Evan's broad chest, breathing deeply in while a slight tremble curses through his body.

People have taught Evan over the last fourteen years that in these occasions one should say things are going to be okay. But he knows he can't say that, he doesn't know if things are going to be okay. He fears they won't. So as he closes his eyes and tilts his head to rest his forehead over Barty's crown, nose buried in his dark hair, he says the only thing he can say for certain.

"I'm here for you. I am always going to be here".

~~~~~~

Notes: I keep trying to write shorter things. I don't really know if I'm succeeding or not. Also, this is apparently a collection of glimpses over those two through their years in Hogwarts. I like to explore the little pieces that made their bond something unbreakable. Who knows, maybe I'll keep writing these.

Since you lovely people keep liking and reblogging, let me introduce you to this post sister:

[sissykyliecakes]

PROJECT G2G UPLOADING

*Kylie enters the room, still dolled up and traumatized.*

"Oh! Kylie Cakes! You're just in time for tonight's viewing!"

What? G2 ... Sh*t, don't!

*pretends that it is new*

Wh - what's this?

"We dug this up from your laptop ... And a lot more ..."

Where did you ... These aren't mine!

"Relax, Kylie Cakes." *wink* "Your secret is out."

I ... Huh?

"Come on! You must remember these, right? They were on your computer, sissy girl!"

... *Blush*

"You really thought it was BLIND LUCK that we ended up sissifying you? What normal forfeit involves a 500 day caging? The lads asked us to come up with a tweet for you to send, the bozos!"

So ... Why did you do all of this to me?

"KYLIE! GIRL! YOU WANT THIS! You crave it!"

N ... No ...

"But you were never going to face the truth and admit it on your own! We had to drag you, kicking and screaming because you were so scared to be yourself!"

"Sash ... I'm so sorry!"

"Kylie Cakes, I knew you were a sissy from about 4 days in! You really don't hide these caps well! I can see you writing them sometimes!"

*Kylie crying with shame*

"Hey ... Relax, sissy girlie! It's OK. You're free now. We've done the hard part for you. Now just be you. Use all this stuff you've learned and be YOU. SISSY GIRL YOU. HOT SLUTTY FAGGY YOU!"

"This one's super cute! We'll absolutely let Kylie tag along to the next festival we all do! We'll help you get all the boys you want!"

"We'll start you on these pills tomorrow. By next summer, this could be YOU."

"Stop writing it in fear. Live it with pride!"

"There are so many girls just like you! This is the place for you to shine, Princess!"

"Look! So many here already!"

@cutieecassie @cutiethessa @cambrysissycaptions @itsjennygirlz @sissy-princess-maddi-femme @sissyloren @friendz0ned-b3ta-cuck @alwayscute

"Hehe! Cute! Girl, we could so take a trip to Thailand if this is how you want to spend it!"

"You'll need to get better in heels though! You can't wear flats and do that sort of work!"

*laughing while still crying. Ashamed and relieved. Shivering and burning*

"We also found this one ... You had 5k followers on here before?"

"Why did you leave it, sissy?"

*Kylie composes herself*

It wasn't my choice. I loved it. It just got taken away from me one day. That was that ... All those girls I'd made friends with ... Gone.

"All that means is that you BUILD it back up again! We'll get your old posts out and you can even return to this guided2girlhood name if you like!"

...

Nah ... It turns out that Kylie Cakes has actually grown on me!

*The girls all hug*

_________

The key to storytelling is to never let them know where it's going!

I hope you enjoyed this arc as much as I enjoyed creating it!

We're back to full-on sissy captions and building my empire back to Tumblr Sissy Fame! I've posted some of my old favourites on here! Hope it triggers the sissy nostalgia! Drop a follow if you like them - I'm here to stay. And if I go ... I'll just come back again! And again! And again!

XOXO

"Kylie Cakes"

[youraverageaemondsimp]

Taste of depravity. // DARK!Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon (Cole)!Reader (Criston's daughter.)

MDNI, reader discretion is advised.

Summary: Aemond knows he shouldn't want you, especially after finding out you that were Criston's daughter, who was his father figure his entire life, yet he can't help himself but to crave the sweet taste of sinfulness.

A/N: y'all he's dark but not the usual dark, he's just psychotic(?) Idk. No noncon, but he's extremely obsessive towards her, and criston is stressed tf out. // divider credit: @cafekitsune

WARNINGS: dark!aemond, p in v sex, unprotected sex, biting, breeding kink, humiliation, dacryphilia, overstimulation, fingering, virginity loss, tiddy sucking, oral (f. receiving), face sitting, manhandling, profanity, reader is a bastard, aemond insults reader for being a bastard, he gets off of her suffering, he's insane, stressed dad criston, traumatic encounters by criston, dilemma, angst(?), fluff, reader is described to resemble criston so she has dark hair and eyes but no color is explicitly stated, + not proofread.

WC: 7k

Criston walked through the hallways of the red keep, armour clinking against each other as he walked towards a person's chamber who he swore to never involve himself with again.

Rhaenyra.

It wasn't the sudden love for her that made him do this, no, in fact he never even loved her, he had only realised after whatever happened on the ship with her.

It was guilt.

Guilt that he had stained his white cloak, guilt that he wasn't able to refuse, because the power imbalance between them was way too high, he couldn't risk it, burning all his efforts just because of refusing a princess.

He couldn't say no.

He was disgusted with himself afterwards.

He tried to pretend it was love to no avail, convincing himself that Rhaenyra didn't just use him for sexual pleasure, that he wasn't just an object or someone to discard, he believed that she loved him.

But none of that was true.

The events that followed along were obvious, she was married off to Laenor, and recently returned to the keep, pregnant with her fourth child.

It was only then Criston noticed the eldest child.

You.

He tried to think you were the same as Jacaerys and Lucerys, a rumoured bastard born to Ser Harwin Strong, Anyone can easily mistake you for his child itself, but not Criston.

The timing did not add up.

And neither did your features resemble Harwin Strong's.

Dark hair and dark eyes.

Features of him.

There was only one answer, and he wanted to be sure himself.

Which is what led him to visit Rhaenyra, something he would've never done in a thousand years to come.

He sighed heavily, knocking on the door, the guard allotted to her chamber looked at him suspiciously before announcing his presence, to say Rhaenyra was shocked is an understatement, she immediately opened the door, a hand resting on her stomach.

“Ser Criston.”

“Princess.” he greets her by bowing his head.

“Princess- I must speak with you, if you'll allow it.” his tone told her everything, and she looked around, before signalling Laenor, who was in the room, to take the boys to the training yard while she let him in.

He tried not to remember the last time, of what happened when he was with her.

“What is the issue?” she asks him, not wasting anymore time.

“Might I speak plainly, princess?” he asks, face stoic, he looks at him for a moment before nodding, and he takes a deep breath.

“Is she mine?”

Silence falls in between both of them, the way she clenches her jaw doesn't go unnoticed by him, and he clenches his teeth as he swallows thickly, bracing himself for the answer.

He already knew it.

He just needed confirmation.

“Yes.”

And that was enough to send all the waves crashing down on him, he stood there, breathing heavily, it felt as though there had been even more weight placed upon him, more than before.

He looks down, and bows.

“Thank you for your honesty, princess.” He says, “Ser Criston, please do not let this get out.” she pleads to him and he thinks for a moment. “Rest assured princess, I will not speak of this to anyone, for it will sully my reputation as it will do yours.” he says sternly and turns on his feet to leave.

His walk down to the training yard was swift, he was behind his allotted time to train the young princes due to this ordeal, yet he couldn't bring himself to care, all he could think about was you.

He stopped in his tracks down the stairs when he spotted you with your younger brothers, playing around with the wooden sword, they were clearly not training since he was their main instructor, just playing around.

He noticed how you smiled brightly, pretending to stab Jace and he fell, committing to his act of being stabbed by you, “Oh no more princess! I beg your mercy.” he played pretend, which made you giggle.

Then you heard a scoff.

You turned to see who it was, only to find your uncle, Aemond, looking at you with raised eyebrows as if he was judging you.

He was.

“Girls aren't allowed to train here.” he simply says, shifting his weight onto his right leg as he relaxes his grip on the sword before holding it placed down in front of him, leaning both his hands against it.

You furrow your brows, opening your mouth to speak up and reply to him but you are immediately cut off by Criston cole.

“Don't stand too upright my prince, you'll get knocked down.” he interferes with an advice for him, and you close your mouth before giving the wooden sword to Jacaerys.

“Ser Criston, May I stay and watch?” You ask him, eyes wide and pleading.

Normally he would refuse.

Normally.

But this situation was anything but normal.

“I already told you, girls are not allowed here–”

“Yes you may, princess.” He cuts Aemond off, and Aemond rolls his eyes while you smile widely at Criston, “But for your safety, please stand far away.” He tells you and you nod, immediately standing as far as possible.

Criston sighs before beginning the training for the boys.

It has almost become a routine for you, watching them train, Criston allowed you to stay and watch, much to everyone's surprise.

You had been hanging out with the boys, using the excuse of keeping a watch over your younger brothers as an excuse, Aemond did not like this however.

This obviously meant you were spending more time with Criston, it was fun being around him, when the boys would warm up for their training he would occasionally tell you about his achievements.

He has no idea why he's doing all of that, he could just ignore you, but he couldn't bring himself to.

It was a fine day, you were in the dragonpit with your brothers and uncles, Jace was learning new commands for his dragon, and you watched boredly, not understanding the obsession with dragons, you did not have one of your own, but you did not care.

Everything was going well, till you noticed Aemond, looking annoyed and wanting to be anywhere else but here, you obviously knew about his obsessions with wanting a dragon, it wasn't unknown.

The young prince's egg never hatched, leaving him without a dragon. You felt bad, knowing it must be tough to be the only one who has no dragon to ride, except you, but you had long given up the idea of wanting a dragon and accepted that you might not ever have one.

His public interest and the desire for always wanting a dragon so badly was what led to this moment, which altered him forever.

Aegon, Jace and Luke decided that it would be funny to mock him.

So they dressed up a pig and presented it to him, pretending it is a dragon while laughing loudly.

You did not find the situation funny at all, your brothers both laughed cruelly, along with Aegon who made the pig noises, you couldn't even bring yourself to let out an awkward chuckle, because you knew how this situation was incredibly mean.

Aemond obviously wasn't laughing, instead he stared at the pig before swallowing thickly, blinking rapidly, you remained silent, observing him. Prince Aegon left whilst mocking him, laughing along with your brothers and exiting the pit while you stayed back, and watched Aemond, who just seemed to be staring at the pig.

“Uncle? I-”

“Don't.” He cuts you off, his voice trembling, as if he was moments away from crying.

He was.

“Aemond.” You stand next to him, you watch as he shoots a glare at you, gritting his teeth.

“Are you here to rub salt on the wound?” His voice was laced with venom and hatred even though it was trembling.

“Why are you always speaking to me like that? I've never been anything but nice to you. Let me guess, you are going to assume that it was I who planned this as well?” You snap, words spilling out of your mouth before you could stop them, his eyes widened.

“I wouldn't be surprised if it was you, after all, it would be your way of getting back at me.” He shakes his head.

“I would never do that to you.” you mumble, which causes his eyebrows to raise slightly in surprise, “I know- well at least I think I do know- what it feels like to not have a dragon, mine didn't hatch either, Aemond.” you try to comfort him.

“It is just that, I simply do not care, I've accepted it.” You shrug, and he scoffs, “A true Targaryen is to have a dragon, I can understand why it wouldn't hatch for you- cause you're... plain.” He stops himself mid sentence, clearing his throat. You look down, fidgeting with your fingers as the air turns awkward, you expected Aemond to leave but he instead stays.

“I- I did not mean it that way, I simply meant that we are both different individuals, not having a dragon might not bother you, but it bothers me, it is a big deal for me, especially if even someone who is a wastrel like my brother has one.” He speaks up and you look at him, maintaining eye contact with him.

You don't know what came over you, but you suddenly grab his hands and hold them tight, “You will have a dragon one day.” you reassure him and he looks down, “You think so?” He asks and you nod, “I'm sure of it.” You smile but he doesn't return that smile.

He simply grabs your hand before turning around and leaving the dragonpit.

To say things changed between you and Aemond since that day would be an overstatement, his behaviour towards you remained the same, except this time it feels as though he is purposefully saying hurtful things, to get a reaction from you.

Is this what you get for being kind?

Yes.

But something did slightly change.

It was the way Aemond looked at you.

He might be mean, but he immediately comes to your defence when it is not him who is doing the mockery.

You learnt it when Aegon was mocking you and Aemond stepped in, defending you, same with your brothers, who would sometimes crack jokes that would be way too over the line, only to have Aemond shut them down.

You had mixed feelings about this.

It was a normal training day, you watched as Criston trained the boys, deciding to focus more on Aegon and Aemond instead of Jace and Luke, but it didn't matter since they were also learning along.

Until a certain presence had come in.

Harwin Strong.

You watched the interaction happen, the air became intense as Criston felt insulted, not wishing to take any criticism from someone from city watch.

Then they fought, Harwin threw punches at Cristons face until he was stopped by the guards, “You act as if you're any better, your attention towards the princess is also quite the unique thing.” Is what Harwin slowly said on top of him, but everyone was too scared and focused on the fight to stop to even care.

Things started to go downhill from then onwards.

Aemond and you have gotten slightly closer and things seemed to be less intense between you both, that was until your mother whisked you and your siblings away to dragonstone.

Criston was devastated, angry but he couldn't do anything about it, nor stop it.

Until driftmark.

He got to see you again, you stood there beside rhaenyra and your siblings watching as the funeral progressed, and clearly understanding the venomous words Vaemond aimed at your family.

Criston fought the urge to leave Alicents side and instead spend it with you, he wants to be closer to you, he wants you to remember him, maybe one day you'll even find out that he is your father, and when you do, he doesn't want you to be disappointed in him.

He made many plans, that if everything went well then your family would visit the keep often.

Of course until Lucerys took Aemond's eye.

He knew the drift between both sides of the family was clearer than ever, especially after Alicent lunged at Rhaenyra in anger with a knife.

Aemond did his best to interfere.

To everyone's surprise, when you came to realise what happened, you immediately sped to Aemond's side, and looked at his face before wincing at the raw sight, he was holding his mother before he turned and his gaze fell upon you.

Your lips trembled slightly as you looked at him softly and with pity, but he didn't return anything back, not even a scowl.

And that would be your last interaction with Aemond, or anyone on that side of that family at all.

Up until years later.

Many years have passed, and Criston tried to forget about everything, but he couldn't. Instead, as the years went by, he grew more worried but curious, he wondered if you'd grown into a woman, he wondered if you look even more like him now.

Luckily all his questions would be answered when he found out that your family would be returning to the keep, as Vaemond had made a petition against Lucerys.

Aemond was far too excited to see you too again, he remembers taking nothing but pleasure in the expressions you'd make when he'd be mean to you, they were forever etched into his memory.

Since the incident from the driftmark, Aemond grew into a much more calculated yet even more mean of a person, his words would be laced towards venom against the ones he despised, dripping ever so sweetly from his tongue.

Your arrival was anticipated by both the men patiently.

And day had arrived just like they hoped, you stepped into the walls of the red keep once again, yet everything seemed to lose its familiarity with the family sigils being replaced to that of the seven.

You did not come across both of them till the next day, until you went into the training yard with your brothers, you watched as they reminisced and smiled, you looked over the spot you always stood whenever you would watch them train, the spot looking smaller since you've grown in height.

However you felt the stares of the people prod at your back and you looked at them to see all of them whispering about your and your siblings obviously non valyrian features.

You try not to let it get to you, and distract Luke from the judgemental gazes, considering how he's already been feeling insecure due to the petition.

That was until you heard a noise in the background, and watched as the people gathered in a shape resembling a circle, you quickly patted Jace and Luke and gestured to them to come with you to watch what was going on.

You immediately spotted the familiar face of Ser Criston Cole, making a wide smile appear on your face as you watched him sway his weapon against who you weren't sure was Aegon or Aemond as the back was turned.

Ser Criston hasn't changed since the last time you saw him, you watch as he swung his weapon towards the Prince, and he countered that attack and blocked it with his sword, causing Criston to withdraw his weapon and take the Prince's previous spot, which lead to the Prince now facing you.

You immediately recognized him the moment you spotted that eyepatch, sitting snugly over his left eye.

Aemond.

Something about seeing him like that made heat travel down your body, is this what they call desire? You swallow thickly. He has indeed grown into a very handsome man, the loss of his did nothing but elevate his looks even further.

The trial match soon came to an end, with Aemond's blade pointing towards Criston's collarbones.

“Well done my Prince, you'll be winning tourneys in no time.” Criston praises, “I don't give a shit about tourneys.” Aemond answers while regulating his breathing, his grip loosens on the sword as his eye lands on you and your siblings, “Nephews,” the sword in his hand is spun slightly as he lowers it, “'Have you come to train?” he asks and that's when Criston's attention turns towards you and his eyes widens.

Jace's throat tightens as he tries to form a reply, not expecting Aemond to be this well trained over the years.

“Niece.” Aemond addresses you next and you look at him, “It has been a while.” He comments, his eye scanning your figure from toe to head, before his lips twitch, forming into a smirk.

“It has, Aem— Uncle.” you reply, cutting yourself off before you spoke his name.

“Princess.” Criston greets you and you smile, “Ser Criston, It is a pleasure to see you again.” you tell him and he nods, giving you a tight lipped smile. He's noticed how you resemble him even more now, which makes him happy but also fear.

“OPEN THE GATES!” you hear a distant voice yell and watch as the gates open.

Vaemond Velaryon enters the premises with guards around him, the chatter and everything falls to silence as the only noise now that can be heard are the footsteps of the guards as they accompany him.

The way he looks at Luke doesn't go unnoticed, causing already shaken up Luke to shiver further in fear, but you hold his hand, reassuring him.

You travel to your chambers patiently and prepare yourselves for the court hearing that would likely be held in a few hours, you sit down and pace around the chambers that were given to you when you had arrived here.

You hear the sound of a stone sliding in your chambers and you turn around to see none other than your uncle aemond emerging from behind a tapestry in the chamber.

“Aemond? What are you doing here? You shouldn't enter a lady's room like that.” You question him, calling him by his name instead of uncle like you did earlier.

He makes his way over to you, his presence was intimidating as he looked over to you. “Pardon my rudeness but how can I contain myself when my niece, who I haven't seen for the past few years appears in front of me?” He quirks up an eyebrow, his eye scans your figure once again, but this time, his gaze lingering more on your breasts before he meets your eyes once again.

“Especially when she's all grown?”

“When the object of both my desire and ire is right in front of me, how can I not?” His hands rest on your hips, and your mouth falls open.

“You are being inappropriate-” You protest.

“Look me in the eye and tell me you did not feel something when you first saw me.”

Fuck.

You thought you covered it well.

“What? Did I catch the cat in the act?” He mocks you and you glare at him, one of his hands travels to your cheek, tilting your head upwards before he descends his lips on your own.

You're shocked at what he's doing, but you don't protest, your mind becomes hazy as he continues kissing you, lips moving against yours in a rhythm, he swipes his tongue against your bottom lip, asking for entrance and to your own surprise, you allow him to by slightly parting your lips open.

The kiss elevates further from there, his tongue fighting against yours as you kiss him back, your hands grip his shoulders as leverage while his own grab your waist pulling you close, it gets rougher, hungrier but more passionate.

He pulls away for air looking at you while breathing heavily, you hold him by the face and pull him into a kiss again and he returns it immediately.

Your head spins as Aemond walks you backward until your back comes in contact with a wall, his grip tightens on you further, he pins your hands above your head as pulls away, and you look at him with pleading eyes, your lips swollen from the kiss.

“Fuck, you're so fucking beautiful for a bastard.” He comments and you frown, “Everyone knows, they just don't say it in front of you.” He says meanly, “I could have your tongue for that.” You threaten him but he smirks, “Hmm? Really?” He mockingly questions and you try to glare at him, but it doesn't seem much threatening.

His free hand hikes your skirts up, and travels upwards to your cunt, you gasp when you feel his cool fingers press up against your clit, then travel slightly downwards where your wetness was beginning to leak from.

“Don't fucking tell me you're getting wet all because I called you a bastard?” He questions, and you try to deny it but your body betrays you by making you clench your thighs together in arousal, he chuckles meanly and you bite your lip to try and fight the humiliation you are feeling.

“You seem to like it when I'm fucking mean to you, don't you? Seriously, you're getting wet from this.” You heave when you feel him pinch your clit, pulling on it meanly, causing you to squirm.

“Yes, yes you fucking do.” He growls.

“Aemond-” You choke out his name and he replies with a hum, “Hm?” He peppers kisses against your neck as you try to form sentences but you cannot seem to do so because of the way his fingers are rubbing small circles onto your clitoris.

“We s-shouldn't— it's unseemly of us oh–? ahh—! fuck.” You throw your head back against the wall when you feel him insert a finger into your awaiting entrance, He slowly moves it in and out, he lets go of your hands which were pinned to the wall, causing them to immediately fall on his shoulders in an attempt to balance yourself.

His free hand trails down to your bodice, he pulls the material down, freeing your breasts, he mutters a curse before peppering kisses to the flesh, and biting harshly which chokes out a whine from your throat. He pulls away and watches as the shape of his teeth get imprinted into the flesh of your breast, marking you.

His mouth then descends onto your nipple, you let out a loud and a lewd moan when you feel his finger curl up and hit the sweet spot inside of you while simultaneously his tongue flicks and plays with your bud.

He inserts another finger inside slowly, stretching you on them and your grip on his shoulder tightens, nails digging into the material of his clothes.

“Are you a maiden?” He asks you suddenly, pulling away from your nipple and you look at him for a second, processing what he said before nodding shyly, which causes him to smirk. “No wonder why you are clenching around my fingers so tightly, Relax.”

He speeds up his pace, hitting the sweet spot over and over again, you clench your eyes shut when you feel a type of tightening begin to form into your lower abdomen.

“Open your eyes.” He commands, you obey and look him directly in the eye, “Good, I want you to look at me when you peak.” He kisses your cheek, and as if right on cue, your orgasm hits you like a sudden storm.

Everything around you feels hot as the pleasure ripples through your entire being, making you moan his name out loud.

He slowly pumps his fingers in and out, letting you ride your orgasm out before placing a kiss to your lips and pulling his fingers out, letting your skirts fall back to place again, and puts the same fingers in his mouth, licking up the evidence of your essence, a satisfactory hum leaves his mouth.

Before he could advance any further, there is a knock on your chamber door, before he watches it slightly open, quick on his feet, he swiftly leaves your chambers through the secret passageway, and you try to fix your clothing, pulling up the material back up to your breasts and patting down your hair.

You watch as the knight enters your chamber and bows to you, “Princess, the court session is about to take place, your presence has been requested.” he tells you and nods, clearing your throat, “I shall be there.” He bows his head before leaving the room and you quickly fix up your appearances before leaving your chambers.

Heart racing at the thought that you both would've been caught if you hadn't reacted quickly.

Aemond, in an attempt to move to his chambers quickly, accidentally took the wrong route and ended up on the path to the small council room, which he figured out when he heard the voices of his mother and Ser criston.

“What do you mean by this criston?” He was about to turn back but halts when he hears his mother talk. “I have noticed your attention on the eldest daughter of rhaenyra, are you infatuated with her?” Alicent asks plainly, voice laced with concern. “No- my queen, she-” Aemond hears Criston sigh, “I suppose I cannot hide it any longer.” This makes Aemond grit his teeth, did Criston actually like you? He couldn't let Criston have you.

“She is my daughter.”

“What?”

What?

Aemond's eye widens as he hears those words leave his mouth, and Alicent is shocked as well. “How long have you known this for?” Alicent questions, “For many years, few months before driftmark.” He tells her, “I apologise my queen, I should've told you it immediately but- I was concerned for her safety.” He confesses and bows his head in shame.

“All is forgiven Ser Criston, Was this from the time you had laid with rhaenyra?” She continues to ask and he nods, “I am glad it is just that, because I plan to betroth Aemond to her, and with what you've just revealed to me, I think I can confidently go through with this.” She tells Criston of her plans, and this satisfies Aemond very much, but there is the fact that he cannot look at you the same anymore, for you were the daughter of someone who was his father figure his entire life.

Besides, he wondered what would Cristons reaction be if he found out what Aemond actually did to you mere moments ago.

“Prince Aemond? Your grace, I do not question your decision, but they don't seem very close, from what I remember, he had always seemed quite rude towards her.” Criston speaks up, he tries not to show the distaste for the choice as he has no say in this, because he cannot rightfully claim you as his daughter. “They will make up eventually, they're both grown ups now, I'm sure they'd put their childish quarrels aside.” Alicent answers him, Criston bites his lip, preventing himself from saying anything. “Besides, she is next in line to the throne, I know there will be complications if we crowned aegon, so we'll retreat and let Rhaenyra rule, after that, Y/N will ascend, at first I was reluctant to have a bastard on the throne, but I changed my mind after your confession.” Alicent reveals her true motives to him which makes Criston internally punch himself for revealing that, he still thinks Aemond isn't the right man for you.

“It is not uncommon knowing that after their marriage- she will eventually give birth to Aemond's children, his heirs, our blood, and they will definitely inherit the throne right after her, putting our blood on the throne.” Criston nods as he listens to Alicent speak.

They fall silent for a bit thinking through it.

“My Queen, the court session is starting.” A guard comes inside the council to inform her, Aemond immediately goes back to his room before cleaning and composing himself and then making his way to the throne room.

The court session was progressing, with Vaemond backing up his reasons to sign a petition against Lucerys, and everyone in court listened intently.

But Aemond's attention is somewhere else, on you, who is currently squirming under his gaze, trying to avoid it, this makes Aemond smirk a little, with all he had overheard from his mother, he could only think of one thing.

You bearing his heirs.

How amazing you'd look with your stomach swollen, carrying his seed deep inside you, this thought alone makes his cock ache.

It was one boring session, until Viserys arrived, and knowing Vaemond had nothing to lose anymore, considering he already lost, he chose to direct vile insults towards you, your brothers and your mother, which led to Vaemond's head partially being cut off by Daemon.

This shocked everyone and Viserys fell weakly onto the chair.

“And one more final— hh. thing.” He wheezes out, “The queen- has proposed a. be- be-brothal between Aemond and Y/N, w-w-which. i. hh accept, it is a perfect way to reunite our drifted houses.” He manages to get the words out. Your gaze turns towards Aemond whose smile just got bigger and you look away immediately blush creeping up your cheeks, frankly, all you could think about was his fingers inside you.

Viserys ends up having a coughing fit, which causes Alicent to panic and scream for the maesters.

Viserys doesn't seem to have left more than a few moons to survive, so they plan a wedding in one moons time, to have the king witness it before he dies, and also so that Rhaenyra can't go back and change her decision.

Dinner that night went peacefully, with Aemond right beside you, Aemond was too focused on you to the point he didn't notice how Lucerys chuckled when the pig had come in, you did, so you shot him a stern but warning gaze, which made him shut up.

You were back in your chambers again, the maids undid your hair, letting it fall freely and got you ready into your bed clothes, you decided to sit by the fire and read a book when you heard the familiar sound of a stone sliding again.

You lifted your head and found Aemond, also in his bed clothes who was coming towards where you sat, “What are you reading?” He asks and before you can close the book, he snatches it from you and views it.

“A caution for young girls?” The name alone is enough to make blush creep up your cheeks, “If I remember correctly, isn't this book forbidden?” He teases and you get up from your seat and grab the book from his hand, turning away from him before placing it on the table.

“What do you want?” You ask, not bothering to turn back.

His arms snake around your waist and wrapping them around it, he nuzzles his nose into the back of your neck and places kisses on it, “I think you know what I want very well.” He mutters, still kissing your neck.

“I'm afraid I don't.” You try to play clueless, not wanting to react to what he's saying but all of that comes crumbling down when he gropes your breast before squeezing it tightly. “Don't you?” He questions and turns you to make you face him.

His hand moves to your cheek, “You want me to remind you? Where we left off?” He asks and you stare into his eye, not speaking anything, trying to deny him. That doesn't last long when he presses his lips against yours, and once again you're kissing him back, he is just so addictive.

He suddenly pulls away, and throws you over his shoulder, catching you off guard and makes his way towards your bed before throwing you on it, causing you to bounce slightly.

“I cannot hold back anymore.” He hovers over your form, trying to contain himself, “Don't.” that one singular word leaving his mouth was enough to break his restraint, and before you know it, he's on top of you kissing your face, neck, breasts as he paws at your nightgown, trying to remove it off you.

Frustrated, he tears it off your body, ripping it into shreds before throwing the fallen pieces away.

Your body is in full view to him now, you feel so vulnerable yet aroused, you rub your thighs together to soothe the ache forming in between them. “Spread them.” He speaks and you're confused until you realise he means your legs, you feel ashamed to do so. “Did you not hear me? Spread those fucking legs.” His voice becomes impatient now, causing you to spread your legs.

You lay there, humiliation poking every inch of your body as he remains silent, staring at your cunt, you shiver when you feel the cold breeze hit your core, and then suddenly Aemond moves swiftly, giving you not enough time to realise what he was doing.

“Wha—” your question is cut off short when you feel his warm mouth on your sex, making you shriek in surprise when his tongue laps at your clit, flicking the bundle of nerves up and down, “Seven fucking hells, you taste divine.” he mutters against your cunt before devouring it once more, his tongue prods at your entrance, before entering inside you, whenever he moved, his nose would bump against your clit causing stimulation.

He suddenly pulls away and lays down next to you before pulling you on top of him, you end up straddling his waist and lay your arms on his chest as support. “Sit on my face.” He demands, “But-”

“Did I fucking stutter? Sit. On. My. Face.” He growls and cuts you off, making you shiver and you obey him changing positions to where your cunt is hovering right above his mouth, his warm breath hitting it.

He grabs your thighs harshly, annoyed at your reluctance and pushes your cunt into his mouth before lapping at it like a man starved, you throw your head back at the pleasure.

You move your hips unknowingly to aid your building pleasure, and it is when he nips at your clit that you feel your peak coursing through your lower body, you choke out a moan of his name.

He once again changes position by laying you on your back and moving up a little, his lips meet yours again, and you wince at the tangy taste of your own juices.

Aemond pulls away, “Gosh, I can't believe a bastard like you has me fucking cunt struck.” He whispers in your ear, “D-don't call me that.” you tell him, “But you seemed to to fucking like it earlier.” You stay quiet to that, not wanting to admit it.

“I know of your tastes my lovely niece, do you even know who your father is?” He asks and you shake your head no, “It's Ser Criston Cole.” He tells you and you look at him shocked, “I overheard him talking to my mother earlier, how does it feel? Lady Cole?” and you remain quiet.

Ser Criston Cole was your father?

It all made sense now.

“But enough of that, your attention should be on me.” He grabs you by your cheeks, squeezing them, “My dirty little whore of a bastard, with a cunt so divine that it puts gods to shame.”

“You should be ashamed of yourself, letting me do all of this to you, do you have no dignity? you're crumbling the moment I try to do something.” He says meanly and tears prick at the corner of your eyes, it wasn't anything new, he had always been this way, ever since he was young, you knew this was humiliating, you knew this was insulting, seven hells, you're even almost crying at his words, yet you can't help but get wet at everything he's saying.

“You're mine, you have always been mine, got it? mine to mock, push you around, fuck, breed and do whatever as I please.” He growls, you lay there and nod, “Gods, it feels so good to be so mean to you, I hate to admit it, but I love seeing you cry.” He wipes the tear that has escaped your eye with his thumb before putting the very same thumb into his mouth and tasting it.

He pushes you further up the bed, before he sits back, he undoes his breeches, and pulls it off along with his tunic, leaving him bare just like you, and you swore that the gods favoured him much more than others, his body seemed as if it was sculpted and moulded personally by the smith himself.

He spreads your legs wide before placing himself between them, his cock rubbing against your folds, “Do you want my cock so bad? Your cunt is fucking weeping for it.” He questions and you nod, “Use your words.” He orders you, and you swallow, “I want your cock.” You speak slowly.

“Beg for it.” He smirks when he sees your eyes widen, and you take a deep breath, trying to form words, he taps your clit with his cock causing you to squirm, “Please-” You managed to choke out. “Please what?”

“Please—! Please I want your cock inside me so fucking badly.” You say, and that is enough for Aemond before he positions his tip at your entrance. “This is going to hurt okay?” He tells you, and you nod.

And gods did it hurt.

His cock was too big, the stretch was unbearably painful, yet Aemond was patient, pushing in slowly and slowly until he was fully sheathed, it took him every grain of control to not start ramming into you like a wild beast, especially the way your cunt was clenching around him, he breathed heavily, letting you relax and adjust to him.

“I'm going to move, stop me if it's too painful.” He tells you and you stare at him, “I thought you found joy in my pain.” you mutter which makes him chuckle, “I do, but even i have my limits, and this is where I draw the line.” He tells you, which makes you smile, “You can move now, Uncle.” you tease and he grits his teeth before drawing his hips back and thrusting into you harshly, you wince as the first few thrusts cause you slight pain, until you relax and eventually get used to it, and slowly get pleasure from it.

But this pace wasn't enough.

“Faster- Aemond–” You heave out as your body jerks up and down beneath, and just like you pleaded, he swiftly increases the speed. “You're a filthy fucking bastard, you know that?” Aemond sneers at you, grabbing you by the cheeks as he brutally thrusts into you. “Answer me.” he groans into your ear and you nod, earning a light slap from him on your cheeks, “With words.” he growls.

“Yes, I- know!” you moan when you feel the tip of his cock hit the sweet spot, hands gripping the linen sheets tightly as he bullies your hole. “And who does this filthy bastard belong to?” He asks, sickeningly sweet, hands leaving your cheek to grip at your breast, twirling your nipple in between his thumb and index finger.

“Y-You.” You gasp when you feel his hand trail down to your cunt and press up against your bundle of nerves before rubbing small and gentle circles on it, elevating your pleasure. “Good girl, you're so good for me, aren't you? Good for your uncle, you'll let me breed you right?”

“Hmm–! Yes! I'll let you breed me– oh fuck right there– yes–” You throw your head back against the bed as you feel him hitting and ramming into your sweet spot again and again and before you know it, your peak is ripped through you brutally, causing you to clench around his cock, making him moan loudly.

“Fuck-” and with a gasp, Aemond finishes inside you, his hot spend coating your inner walls, creating a warm feeling, he slowly rides his orgasm out, staying in until his cock begins to soften.

“You'll look so beautiful with my children, your breasts will swell with milk, and I'll indulge myself in them, because you're mine, you belong to me and I shall do as I please with you, and you'll let me right?” He asks and you nod, “Such a fucking pretty bastard, and my soon to be wife.” He presses a kiss to your forehead.

He pulls you into his arms and you both fall asleep, too tired to even clean up because of the eventful day.

A month later.

To say Criston was disappointed would be an understatement, he didn't hate Aemond, but he didn't like him to the point where he would watch his only child, that too who he cannot claim openly, be wedded off to him.

But at least you look happy and content with him.

After the vows were said and you were officially declared as Aemond's wife, Criston left the scene not being able to control his emotions, he stood at the very same place where he almost took his life, gazing up into the sky, “Ser Criston?” He heard your voice and immediately turned to you, “Princess.” He bows, “You can drop the formalities.” You tell him with a smile and he looks at you questioningly, “Fathers shouldn't be formal with their daughters after all.” You explain and his eye widens before he looks around to see if anyone heard that.

“You- know it?” He chokes, not being able to hold back his tears anymore. You nod “Aemond told me.” You tell him, and he immediately hugs you and you return the hug, “I am sorry, I failed you, but I had my own reasons, even then, I still apologise, I wish I had been there for you more.” He cries and you pull away from the hug, “It is fine, I can understand.” you reassure him and he smiles at you.

Everything seemed to have ended happily.

Though there was that one thought which Criston had that was immediately forgotten when you pulled him back to the wedding.

How did Aemond even come to know of it?

— !  ݈݇- thank you so much for reading! i hope you enjoyed it <3 comments and reblogs are appreciated greatly ♡

[orteil42]

I finally found you. Er, more specifically, I wasn't aware that you were so easy to find. Admittedly, I was never a big fan of cookie clicker. I never got enjoyment out of it and (as you are WELL aware) it started a Wave of games that maybe didn't add much to the industry, I don't think. (Maybe I'm wrong, though- again, I haven't really looked closely at it.) So y'know, I never looked closely at it, and I'm still not going to. Idle clickers just can't hold my attention and I don't want anything to do with them tbh.

However.

Our parents- well, they said they loved us, but my mother did nothing but scream at my little brother for misbehaving, and my father would yell at him if he laughed- treated him terribly. My mother cites his autism for the reason why he didn't talk for the first few years of his life but if I had to guess, it was probably more because he was punished for noise.

Genuinely? Genuinely. Thanks for keeping my little brother distracted from the traumatic, scarring things happening around him in his youth. You don't know how much comfort it brought me to stare off into the horror and just to turn and see how he was doing to find him making like. A shitton of cookies, without a thought in the world.

And no matter what anyone else says about any other part of your game, no matter how much shit anyone like me would want to give you for the admittedly hilarious trend it started.

Still- your game brought a little boy who had a very niche, very unfortunate passion quite a lot of joy. While the world fell apart around him, he had Cookie Clicker.

There is nothing in the world I would want more than my brother having something he can enjoy without being yelled at, or without it being taken from him. There is nothing more precious to me than my little baby brother.

And I mean that.

So thank you. You've saved my brother's life and in turn saved mine, and I cannot be more thankful.

well! damn

[theealbatross]

love is the most twisted curse of all (shadow trio headcannon)

Plot | How the Shadow Trio expresses their love and the price they willingly pay for it.

Tags: |dark-ish, unhealthy friendships/relationships, platonic (or not depends on your interpretation), codependency, manipulation, aged up, implied crimes, implied murder, slytherins can't love normally, implied seb x mc if u squint, traumatized!slytherins can't accept healthy love, seb and mc are dark wizards, auror!sebastian, my opinion only, might be ooc

[A/N: Photos (except two) are not mine! This is something short I wrote because i can't get it out of my head lol]

Ominis Gaunt: The Heir

. Ominis loves by doing what is necessary.

. A perfect Slytherin through and through, Ominis (whether he is aware or not) lives the closest truth to the Slytherin motto. Anything that is 'his' is protected at any and all cost.

. There is no heaven high enough he won't reach or a hell low enough that he won't crawl in if it meant saving the people dearest to him.

. Like the perfect slytherin heir Ominis is akin to a snake, his morality slithering and bending to fit his narrative. His bones creak, skin stretching as he wraps himself around his loved ones until they are untouchable.

. He is aware of his flaws but he is not so honorable to fix it. He knows the real world -- the darker side of the wizarding world's high society, one that his companions aren't too familiar with -- and he will move hell and high water to protect them from it in the shadows.

. Dark Spells being used a bit too closely in where Sebastian is stationed? It must be those damned dark wizards, Minister. Isn't Auror Sallow so gallant in facing those pests?

. Poacher corpses leading a trail to you? Surely, such stains of the wizarding world wouldn't be missed. The Hero of Hogwarts did us all a favor, it would be a shame to condemn such heroics.

. Suspicious rumors following his friends? Not while he was at the top of high society, manipulating reputations and snuffing out nonbelievers. Any tongue that rises against them will be cut.

. He is a Gaunt, and as much as he loathes the dark history behind his name -- he knows how to wield its power. He is the only one who can properly wield it and it is a sword he is willing to use -- if necessary.

Sebastian Sallow: The Prodigy

. Sebastian loves by monopolizing.

. As a boy who lost too much at such a young age, his entire world surrounds the few people he considers his own. And if you are one of his people know his whole world will surround you.

. He has to have access and knowledge of his loved ones at all times. In-depth, illegal, background checks on all people his pretty witch associates herself with? Fair game, it's for your safety, darling. Charmed pieces of jewelry that lets him know of your location at all times? Christmas and birthday gifts from him to you, wear it at all times or he'll charm it so it never gets removed. A ring that will transport Ominis to his side at the first sign of danger? Ominis you are far too important a person to put your life on mere Aurors hands, I'll handle it.

. Normal people would be put off but after all the things the three of you have been through, putting your lives and safety in Sebastian's hands is the best course of action. It is for your own good, after all.

. Sebastian is fully aware he has unfortunately been cursed with having brilliant friends with bounties in their heads in the underworld. Therefore, the best course of action would be the one to rule it.

. Living a double life as the honorable Head Auror and a dark wizard was not for the weak but Sebastian has always been used to compartmentalizing different faces for different facets of his life. A brilliant student, a delinquent, a doting brother, a traitor, a partner in crime, a merciless murderer. He'll wear any and all masks and become the monster he is required to be if it meant he got to keep you.

. Sebastian doesn't have a lot of people he loves so he will not ask for forgiveness in how he protects those that is willing to be loved by him. They're his -- his to love, his to protect, his to consume.

. And he'll let all the curses and corpses pile up into a mountain of sins before he'll lose anyone ever again.

MC: The Hero

. She loves through devotion.

. Once you consider them as a friend they can do no wrong in your eyes and if they do commit mistakes you will dig the deepest pit to bury it in with your own bare hands.

. Being told you were special, you were different, you were powerful at a very early age fractured your reality. The world is your oyster, it will be whatever you deem it to become.

. For what is power if you can't even help those you love the most?

. Do you want me to take care of 'it', Omi? You know I hate it when you strain yourself with politics. Someone tried to take Sebastian to court for excessive violence? Who is it? Are you going to handle it or should I? Why can't they just let him be?

. You will follow them blindly at whatever corner of the earth they are calling from. Anything that has to do with them is a priority of the highest order as far as you are concerned-- so much so that people have to go to Ominis and Sebastian first to convince them to convince you to help.

.There is no such thing as a good or bad anymore -- you will stand on whatever side they are on, and the rest of the world can decide if they want to stand with you or against you.

. There will be no such thing as a consequence if you had anything to say about it. And you had the final say about everything.

. All will always be well for you and everyone you love. You will make sure of it.

.You are special, after all.

[bangchansgirlsblog]

9th member getting in a bad fight w skz (v v v angsty)

Hit me where it hurts.

Warning: very traumatizing, read at your own risk!

Pairing: skz x 9th member

Summary: friends fight all the time but eventually get back together right?

!not proofread so forgive me for mistakes!

You will hate me after this but I love you 😆Enjoy!

-🩷

*

My body stumbles into the dorm rooms. A giggle leaves my mouth. My vision was blurry, no doubt there. The room was spinning but in a good way.

The scent of a good home cooked meal filled my nostrils as I sat on the floor and removed my tied shoes.

Another giggle escapes my mouth as I get up and fall down on my bum.

“Y/n? Is that you?” A voice calls that makes me jump a little. I look up to see leeknow walking into the little entrance of the dorms.

“Heyyy Oppa,” my words slur as I get up again slightly sliding but able to balance.

He looks at me examining my body. He was wearing sweatpants and a white hoodie. His glasses were on too meaning he was cooking. He stood there arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed.

“Have you been drinking again?” His voice is calm yet harsh.

“Maybe,” I simply say before giggling again and walking past him making my way to the living room.

His body turns with mine as he follows behind continuing the conversation.

“Are you fucking serious? We talked about this.” His tone was getting louder and I didn’t like it at all. I stopped and looked at him. His face a few inches away from mine.

“But Oppa I thought you said you would support me in everything I do,” I tilt my head and bite my lip. Slowly a smirk crips up. “Don’t you like seeing me happy?” I hiccup.

He takes a step back and I frown, “You’ve been coming home drunk for the past two weeks! What is wrong with you? We’ve been worried sick!” He growls quite literally. His face turning red and his arms crossed.

“Okay but what’s the big deal I had a little to drink, whatever,” I roll my eyes and turn my body to continue walking to the living room.

His hand grabs mine. I squirm a little trying to make him let go. “Let go Leeknow your hurting me,”

“Look at yourself Y/n! Just look! You’re a fucking mess!” His voice is loud now. Filled with anger and running through out the house. His towering over me. Making me feel small.

“Leeknow I said let go of me now!” I yelp but he doesn’t. His breathing is heavy and his looking at me with dark eyes. Filled with hurt and anger.

“Your killing yourself-“

I cut him off. Not even bothering to listen to the long speech he was about to give because what was the point? We had been going through this for the past week. The same old boring ass speech.

“I don’t fucking care! You didn’t care about me before now why all of a sudden you care about me now huh? Huh?! You’re a monster, you and all the boys are!” I’m now yelling at the top of my voice. His hand lets go shocked at my reaction. He steps back trying to process what I was trying to say. His eyes searching my face.

“What do you mean I didn’t care? Who was fucking there for you when you got eliminated? Who was h there for you when you broke your ankle? Who the fuck was there for you the nights you couldn’t learn a choreography? Huh? Who the fuck was there for you when your mum disowned you? Stop being a fucking little bitch about everything and running away from your problems. Face them! Face them instead of drinking them away!”

“Don’t you ever talk about my mother again leeknow,” my voice is low, anger laced all over it. It almost comes out as venom.

His stood in-front of me, his hands are in a fist. Why was his hand in a fist? Was he going to hit me? What was he trying to do?

“If you going to fucking hit me, hit me! Hit me leeknow-“

I step closer to his body. My finger poking at his chest and he clenched his jaw. The world is still spinning and the room is dim.

“Hey! What the fuck is going on?!” Hyunjin drops his phone on the ground and runs towards us. His hand automatically wrapping around my waist and pulling me away from leeknow who is huffing in anger. Trying to calm down.

“What the fuck Y/n?! Have you been drinking again?” Hyunjin asks me when he puts me down. His runs his hands through his hair as he starts to examine me. His eyes going back and forth between me and leeknow. “Please don’t tell me you haven’t,”

I go quiet but Leeknow Ofcourse had to step in.

“Yes she has been-“

“It doesn’t have to do with any of you!” I yell at him. I grab my jacket that laid on the floor and slightly stumble. Hyunjin is still processing what’s going on but leeknow still has a lot to say, I see it, I sense it.

“Yes the fuck it does because you promised you would stop! Look at the way you’re talking to leeknow! You can’t even see in a straight line for crying out loud!” Hyunjin’s outbursts caused me to snap back into reality.

“Why are you on my dick Hyunjin? Why are you alwyals in my business?! God! Ever since you came back from haitus you’ve been such a clingy bitch!” The words leave my mouth and my brain stops. I instantly regret what I had just said. I knew Hyunjin didn’t like his hiatus and it was the worst time in his life.

“Hyunjin’s I didn’t mean-“

“Are you serious? Are you serious right now y/n?” Leeknow cuts into the argument. His now walking towards both of us. His hands waving in the air as he speaks. “Why would you say such a thing to him? You know how sensitive that is!”

Hyunjin’s eyes start to shine, his lips turning into a frown then a scowl, “and ever since you were sexually assaulted you’ve been moping around like a bitch!” Hyunjin took a step away from me his hands were shaking. His voice is louder than ever. His body upward and straight.

The word hit me hard. My body starts to shake aswell. This was the biggest fight we had ever gotten into and we had just taken it on another level.

“Oh great then why don’t we all just leave eachother alone huh?!” I stumble back again, the alchohol getting to me as hard as the emotions were. “You know what? Fuck you leekmow, fuck you hyunjin!”

“That’s great because you know what?! Chan never wanted you in the group before! He just picked you cause you were a sad fucking trainee that nobody wanted in their team-“

“Hyunjin!” A voice yells and we all turn at Chan and Felix who are standing at the door. Obviously coming from outside. They were both wearing coats and beanies due to the coldness outside.

“I’m sorry! I had to say it, She’s a bitch!” He glares at me and then back at Chan “and I mean it, I can be a bitch to if I wanted too,” he spits at me.

I look at him in disbelief. My heart ached. My heart ached so much I couldn’t help but hold my chest.

“Where the fuck have you been Y/n? So you know me and Felix have been walking out in the cold for hours looking for you?!” I look up at Chan who is now in the same area as us. Leeknow still standing there pissed off trying to calm down.

“Why would you? Because I’m a sad little girl that needs saving?!” I scoff when I reply to Chan. His face falls, so does Felix’s. My Han trying to support my weight as I watch everyone in the room glaring at me.

Was this even real? Was I even real?

“Are you drunk Y/n?” He looks at me, eyes wide opened. His hands turn into a fist as well. His jaw tensed up.

“Ask your little fucking friends that you wanted,” I scoff and turn my back on them starting to walk out the door. I fall to the ground (quite literally) and put on my shoes. Then get up. The boys all watching in shock trying to figure out what to do.

“Where are you going?!” Chan yells, “running away from your problems won’t solve anything! Y/n! Stop!” His shouts are getting louder as I open the door not bothering to listening to him.

“I’m going somewhere fucking away from you and your pathetic little team! Chan leave me the fuck alone.” Everything goes quiet as I unlock the door but the glass shattering causes me to turn and look at their direction.

Pieces of glass laid in front of them. The handle of the face still in Chan’s hand.

“Good go away and don’t come back all you do is cause us problems!”

“Hyung!” Felix gasps and grabs his arm trying to calm him down. “Don’t say that! Ever-body just please calm down and let’s talk about it-“

“I didn’t want to be in the group in the first place!”

“We all didn’t want you either but look where we both are!”

“Hyung stop!” Felix puts his hand over his mouth. “That’s not true! Look at you guys.” His eyes tears up as he looks at me. My heart breaks. “Y/n just come back inside and let’s talk about it okay?”

“Let her go Felix, she’s pathetic anyway.” Hyunjin says as he turns around to walk back to his room.

I slam the front door and run up the apartments stairs. I need to get away for a moment. I needed to think. I stumble through out until I get to the roof stop.

I take a deep breath and find my legs swinging off the edge. I look down to say the busy street.

When did life get this busy? This out of control?

I had to deal with a lot. I couldn’t anymore. I wouldn’t. If the boys didn’t want me anymore then I had no one.

Hot tears run down my cheeks. The pain in my chest aching even worse than before. The wind blew on my hair as I took a deep breath in and let myself go.

“No wait! Y/n!” I hear I.N’s scream. Instant regret fills my body but it’s to late. My body falling down the different floors, gasps and screams fill the street until everything goes quiet. My mind goes quiet.

Then end.

*

Y’all I feel so bad omg forgive me 😭

-🩷

PT 2:

[froody]

TLDR: do not read a loved one’s diary.

During Hurricane Helene while the power was out, I was rummaging around in the garage looking for rechargeable battery packs. They happened to be housed in a plastic tote with a number of small notebooks. I decided to take the notebooks and look through them while I sat in my car waiting for my phone (and power bank) to charge. They were mostly blank. Some were mine.

One was my mother’s therapy notes from 2016. I should have closed it and put it back when I noticed what it was. I wish I had. I didn’t. I read it. I’m fucking evil. I invaded her privacy and I read it. Most of it was things I knew she had thought and felt at the time but something hurt me. She called me selfish and self-centered several times. This wouldn’t bother me if she was calling 2024 me selfish/self-centered but I was a SUICIDAL FIFTEEN YEAR OLD at the time.

I spent the ages 12 to 18 essentially locked in my room. My parents had an extremely toxic relationship and whenever I left my room, I ended up in the middle of their arguments trying to mediate and trying to get my mom to leave my father. When I was 13, I remember her busting down my door to take my phone to call her boyfriend because my father had taken her keys and her phone and she had no way to escape the house because we lived in the middle of nowhere with no neighbors. She left that night and LEFT ME WITH HIM.

I didn’t leave my room because my parents would both get drunk and scream at each other and my dad would PUT HIS HANDS ON HER IN FRONT OF ME.

I begged her to leave him for years. I begged. She kept going back. She finally left him when I was 14 but by then I was already traumatized, actively suicidal and failing school due to the stress at home and my worsening mental health. She was not good with my suicidal ideations and spiraling mental health. She didn’t neglect me medically, I saw several different physiatrists and therapists and was on so many psychiatric medications that I cannot remember what I’ve tried and what worked and what didn’t. But whenever I reached out for help, looked to her for support, told her I was suicidal or too anxious to leave the house, she treated it like it was a manipulation tactic on my part. She treated me not like I was faking for attention but like I was faking to hurt HER. One time, when I was 14, I told her I was contemplating suicide and she DROVE AWAY AND LEFT ME ALONE IN OUR NEW HOUSE.

So I locked myself in my room and essentially greyrocked her. I didn’t listen to her problems anymore. I didn’t tell her my problems anymore. I told my problems to 20 and 30 somethings online on Skype and KIK. And she called me selfish and self-centered because I pulled away.

I understand she was an extremely emotionally injured, traumatized and abused woman but I was an extremely emotionally injured and traumatized child. A 15 year old child. A little boy who couldn’t trust and confide in either of his parents. But to her I was selfish and self-centered. Because I did not want to play psychiatrist anymore.

Our relationship only really improved in senior year/into my adulthood. My mental health improved and I learned to cope a little better. I still keep an element of emotional shallowness between us but we don’t fight anymore. I love my mom. I have no doubt my mom loves me. I just cannot trust her with my mental health. That’s okay.

But reading her therapy notes, which I only saw because my ass was snooping and violated her privacy, reopened some horribly healed wound within me and I’ve felt myself disconnect from her again? I don’t know how to explain it. I felt it but I don’t think I really realized what it was until she broke her foot on my birthday while I was home alone an hour and a half away. It’s like this emptiness. I’m struggling to respond to her texts and show appropriate concern and love and pour from that glass within me. I’ve withdrawn back into that snail shell, back into the safety of my own little sphere. And it shouldn’t be something I take out on her. All because I’m hurt by something she felt/wrote 8 years ago, something deeply personal that she expressed privately to a therapist and in her journal. Something I shouldn’t have read. This is so fucked up. I’m so beyond fucked up. I hate myself.

[sunny44]

My forever valentine

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Fem!reader

Warnings: none

Summary: just a Valentine’s Day.

I woke up to an empty and cold bed and checked the time; usually, Lewis would still be in bed, and Levi would have already left his bed and come over here, so I found it strange that neither of them was there.

I got up and opened the curtains, and the view from our window was the backyard. Lewis and Levi were just in their shorts, chasing each other, and Roscoe was barking and running along. I started laughing at the scene and then went to the bathroom to get ready and after finishing, I went downstairs to the lawn.

"Mama," he shouted and ran towards me with Roscoe, I crouched down and picked him up. "Good morning, mama."

"Good morning, baby." I kissed his forehead, and Lewis came over to where we were. "You guys woke up early today."

"Levi showed up in the room hungry, so we came to eat some fruits and play a little, enjoy the sunny day." He gave me a peck, and Levi grumbled. "You know she was mine long before she was yours, right?"

"My mama." He hugged me tightly, and I laughed.

"Well, you guys keep playing, and meanwhile, I'll have something to eat." I put him down.

I went to the kitchen and saw the countertop covered in rose petals, red heart balloons, and a breakfast ready with a card beside it.

"Happy Valentine’s Day baby, Levi and I are so lucky to have you in our lives.

We love you so much, hope you enjoy the breakfast we made for you."

Love, Lewis and Levi."

"Did you like it, mama?" I heard his voice behind me, and I turned around, seeing him and Lewis standing there.

"I love it." They both smiled.

“That’s great baby.” Lewis said and smiled.

"What are the plans for today?" I asked, starting to eat.

"We're going out for lunch, then we're going to spend the day in the yacht and at the end of the day, Levi's going to Uncle Charlie's while we have a mommy and daddy time." I smiled at him.

"Does Charles know about it or…"

"He offered."

"Okay then."

"Mama?"

"Yes, baby?"

"Can I have one of your strawberries?"

"Of course you can." I picked him up and sat him on my lap, handing him a strawberry.

"Do you want to be my valentine, mama?" He asked, and I melted with his soft voice and big brown eyes.

"Oh, baby, of course I want to be your valentine." I kissed his forehead.

"Wow, this boy has rizz."

"He does, you better watch your back." He laughed and kissed me.

Bonus scene!

Y/nhamilton instagram post

Liked by @lewishamilton, @yourmomuser, @charlesleclerc and other 9193810

Tagged: @lewishamilton

Y/nhamilton I have always been and will always be grateful to have you in my life, today is just another of the many Valentine's Days I will spend by your side. Thank you for being the best husband and father I could have chosen to spend my life with, I love you and I always will.

Ps: I’m giving your present after Levi goes to sleep.

@lewishamilton I’m the luckiest to have you in my life, Levi is one of the best presents you could’ve ever given me, love you babe

Also I’m very excited about this present

Liked by @y/nhamilton

@charlesleclerc happy Valentine’s Day guys, I will babysit Levi so you can give Lewis that present and don’t traumatize the poor boy

@y/nhamilton thank you uncle Charlie, I’ll drop him later

@user81 I think we’ll have another Hamilton in a few months

Lewis Hamilton instagram post

Liked by @y/nhamilton, @sebastianvettel, @georgerussel and others 9173891

Tagged: @y/nhamilton

@lewishamilton Eight years ago I made the best choice of my life, which was to chase after you and insist that you let me take you on a date. And now, years later, I'm the luckiest guy to be able to say that I'm your husband and the father of your child.

I love you and even after eight years I’m still completely in love with you.

@y/nhamilton I love you both so much, thank you for being my partner in crime

Liked by @lewishamilton

@georgerussel happy Valentine’s Day guys

@y/nhamilton thank you Georgie, happy valentines for you too

@anthonyhamilton beautiful family

@lewishamilton love you dad

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[acourtofmarvels]

Patience - Cassian

No OC this time, just your average Cassian x Reader (I used she/her pronouns but please use any you would like to.)

Summary: Y/N has been apart of the IC for 100 years after they saved her from a horrible incident that left her broken and traumatized. Cassian knew she was his mate from the second he saw her. Though he never could tell her, not after everything she endured.  They put her back together. She loved them and they loved her. Her family. Though, in the recent couple years she developed feelings a little stronger toward the male who she would soon find out to be her mate. 

Warnings: hints of abuse and assault. fluff

Word count: 3369

Cassian

"Why haven't you told her?" Rhysand asked me. I looked at him like he was crazy. He must be. Thinking I could ever tell her.

"How could I put that on her? After all she's been through. She's open to us now. She's stronger, braver. She's finally starting to learn to cope with her trauma. I don't want to scare her with something so... intimate."

I saved her. I have kept her safe. I helped her, trained her. Held her when she needed it, gave her space when she needed it. Those 50 years when Rhys was under the mountain she never left the House of Wind once. She didn't feel safe without her High Lord here. Even though Az and I were always with her.

"Cassian..." Rhys started.

"You kept it from Feyre, why? Cause you wanted to keep her safe, you didn't want to scare her. You wanted her to be ready for it. Thats exactly what I'm doing." He's being so hypocritical. How could he think I could just spring this on her?

"You've know for 100 years-"

"I knew the moment I saw her. She was covered in her own blood and vomit, bruised, broken and bare. You didn't see her, Rhys. You didn't feel-" I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I was the one who covered her, brought her to Valaris to be healed and saved."What those monsters did to her..."

"They're dead now. They'll never hurt her again." Yeah. I killed them all. Made them suffer. Had them begging and pleading for their lives.

"She's still healing. I'd wait another 100 years if had to." 

Her POV

"We can go back if you want," Mor said quietly to me. We walked down the cobblestone sidewalk through the markets in the town square. Her arm linked in mine, her way of letting me know she wasn't leaving my side.

"No, I feel... good. It's a beautiful day. Everything feels like it's fitting into place. I've noticed these past few months that I finally feel like my old self again. But.. better."

It felt so good getting out of the house. Walking down the streets of my home. Home. I'd been here for a century. I've found my family here. People who love me, scars and all. And I love them. They're my rock. I wish I could say that I put myself back together after being broke for so long but it was them. They hold me together.

"Have you gotten all your gifts yet?" It was solstice this week. Everyone's favorite time of year.

"I have." I smiled at her. "And I'm not telling you what I got you." I knew by the tone in her question that's exactly what would lead next.

"Come on! Did you get it when we were together? I always take you shopping. How could you have possibly gotten my gift?"

"Cassian took me yesterday." I didn't like going out by myself. Too much anxiety. Mor or Feyre always go shopping with me in the markets. The boys take me other places, exploring Prythian if I please.

"Cassian never goes shopping with me! Gods, how did you convince him to do that?"

"I just asked him and he said yes." I shrugged. Cassian has always been sweet. He never tells me no. I feel guilty about it sometimes. I don't want to bother him.

"You have him wrapped around your finger, I swear." Mor groaned and I laughed.

"I do not." My face felt warm as a blush crept up upon my cheeks. Me blushing for a male? That hasn't happened since before... "Cassian just worries about me."

"Yeah worries a little too much." She rolled her eyes playfully. "You're staying at the town house with all of us this week right?" Rhys and Feyre mentioned they wanted everyone there this week. It was kind of tradition but this was the first solstice since the war and it just felt a little extra special.

"Of course. And I will also be drinking my weight in wine."

"Oh gods, a drunk you is never good." Mor and I both laughed loudly. I didn't drink much. Only with them. And usually on special occasions.

***

"Leave! You'll see us when we are ready!" Feyre yelled through the door. Rhysand wanted to see which dress she picked. He was being very persistent. It was so cute.

"Just a peak, my love," he said. I could practically hear the smile in his voice. I felt a weird pang in my chest. That was weird.

There was some more playful arguing between them before Feyre finally came back over to the vanity where I was sitting as Mor was doing my hair and makeup.

"He's acting like a child and I just took away his toy," Feyre mumbled, "Illyrian baby."

Mor was the first one of us who was ready. She was wearing a long black silk dress with her signature red lips. Feyre was wearing a dark blue sparkly dress. It took me a while to pick which dress to wear. Feyre insisted on the maroon one, while Mor wanted me to wear the emerald green. I am bad at making decisions so I let Elain pick and she favored the maroon one more like her sister. 

"Mother above we look hot," Mor whistled as the three of us stood in front of the giant mirror in Feyre and Rhys room. 

The door squeaked as it opened, Elain slipping through. "Stop being annoying, you swear you've never seen her dolled up before." She mumbled to whom I could only assume was Rhysand. She closed it behind her, pressing her back to it. Elain was in a pale pink dress. She favored the lighter colors. "The boys are getting rowdy and insist we go down to eat dinner."

"They're children, I swear." Feyre rolled her eyes but she was smiling, as was I. Feyre followed Elain out the door. I briefly heard Rhys say some curse words at the sight of his mate before Feyre shut the door behind her. 

Mor reached for the handle of the door but paused when she noticed I was hesitant to follow her. I could tell she was immediately worried for me. "What's wrong?" Was I really that transparent? 

I couldn't lie to her. She can always tell when I'm lying or hiding something. "I am nervous." I admitted, my hands gripped the fabric of my dress nervously. 

"Why? Has something happened?" I think I was the closet with Mor. She was there since the beginning. For the first few months after the incident I was to afraid to be around males. Mor never left my side. She didn't even know me yet she cared so much. 

"Nothing has happened. Just, something feels different." I could feel the aching in my chest. I had noticed it every time I was around Rhys and Feyre, I didn't understand. 

"A good different or a bad different?" She took ahold of my hand, a comforting gesture she did to know that she was there for me and she wasn't leaving. 

"I'm not sure. I think what I'm feeling is good but it hurts sometimes." She gave my hand a small squeeze. 

"Do you want to leave? I can winnow us out right now. No questions asked. You say the words and we're gone." I smiled at her. 

"No I don't want to leave. I just... I had that on my chest." I took a deep breath. She continued to rub her hand over mine. She always held my hand when I was anxious or feeling emotional. It was comforting, to know she was always by my side when I needed her. 

The door burst open, in came an angry looking Amren. Her hand was gripping the doorknob so hard I thought she might pull it off. "If you don't get downstairs in the next two seconds I'm killing them all." She glanced down at Mor holding my hand and Amren's face actually softened. It wasn't often I saw any other sign of emotion on her face that wasn't anger or annoyance. "What's going on? Are you alright, Y/N?"

I let out a small laugh. I love that they all worry for me. But it does get annoying the amount of times a day I hear Are you okay?  "I'm quite alright, thank you. Let's eat, I'm starving." 

Amren went first, Mor following and myself close behind. The biggest smile formed on my face the second I heard the low, loud, voices of the rest of my family downstairs. I don't even know what they were saying but Cassian's voice stood out to me. My heart sped up and I ignored it like I always did. It was a weird feeling I didn't understand. It always happened around him or even to the thought of him. 

"The night has barely begun and you're already giving me a headache," Amren grumbled as she hopped off the last step. The room grew quiet as Mor and I came into view. My eyes locked onto Cassian's first. There went that feeling again. He pushed his chair back, standing up straight. I noticed Rhysand and Azriel were standing up to. 

"Now don't stop the party on our account," Mor said. 

Rhysand was the first to speak out of the males. "You both look marvelous." He then looked at down at his mate who was sitting in the chair beside him. He must have said something to her for only her to hear because a slight blush freckled upon her cheeks. 

Azriel approached both of us, complimenting us. He hugged Mor, then looked at me for permission. I smiled at him and opened my arms to give him a hug. "Thank you, Az." The males were always hesitant to show any type of affection toward me. I understood why and I was grateful for it. 

As Azriel walked back over to where he was sitting previously at the dinner my eyes locked once more on the Illyrian general. 

"Y/N you look-" Cassian choked on his words. "I mean y-you both look, um, wow." He motioned to Mor and I. I'd never seen him so nervous. 

"Settle down Cass, you might just woo them away." Rhys said making Az laugh. Cassian's face turned red as he sat back down in his seat. Feyre swatted his arm and scolded him silently. 

The night continued on as we ate and drank. I sat at the end of the table with Elain on my right and Mor on my left. The smile on my face only grew bigger as the night went on. 

I kept the smile on my face as I glanced at Rhys and Feyre, who were talking quietly to each other, stealing kisses back and forth. I wanted that. That love that they share. That was the first time I was admitting it. I think I just realized why I felt that pang in my chest every time I looked at them together. That connection was what everyone craved. That unrelentless love. I didn't even know I was ready for that but I now realize that I do. 

I looked away from them. I couldn't watch anymore. I needed to focus on something else before they noticed my change in demeanor. 

I couldn't help but look at Cassian. He could always calm me down in the worst of times. It was like he knew I was watching him cause the second he looked at me every thing changed. It felt like the world stopped and something shifted. It started in my chest, a glowing warmth that began to sooth my aching heart, like a bandage to a wound. The warmth spread outwards, moving to my limbs and beyond my body, forming a bridge between us. 

The second that connection snapped I stood up abruptly, the chair beneath me almost falling back I pushed it back so quickly. The tears were already falling down my face. "You-" I couldn't even form a sentence. I had to cover my mouth with my hand to prevent myself from sobbing then and there. Cassian was standing too, worry all over his face. But he knew. I knew he knew. 

I couldn't breath. I knew people were calling my name. I knew Mor was by my side but everything felt numb. I needed to get out of here. 

I didn't look out as I ran out of the townhouse. Into the cold air, through the falling snow. He's my mate. Cassian is my mate.

"Gods, Y/N, you're gonna catch a cold out here." His voice alone soothed me. He appeared in front of me, wrapping a cloak around my shoulders to keep me warm. 

"How long?" I looked up at him, his face blurry through my tears. 

"Let's go back inside, I don't want you to get sick out here," he avoided the question, which only made me angry. 

"How long have you known, Cassian?" I raised my voice. I wiped my tears away so I could see him better. The sun was beginning to set but the faelights outside were shining on his face. 

"I knew the moment I saw you. It snapped immediately." He said quietly. He looked down at his feet, not daring to look at me. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" My voice was barely above a whisper. I was trying to hold it together now but my voice was failing me. 

"How could I?" Cassian looked up and it was then that I noticed the tears in his eyes also. "After what they did to you. After everything you've been through... I couldn't put that burden on you."

"A burden? You feel being my mate is a burden?" 

"No, never." He reached his hands out like he wanted to hold me, but he lowered them and took a step away from me. "I didn't want to scare you. I wanted the bond to click into place for you. I wanted you to be ready. But I will never force anything upon you. If you want to reject it, I will be okay." It was hard for him to say that. I know he didn't mean to but I could feel him send his sadness through the bond. 

I stepped directly up to him, he straighten up but didn't move away this time. He was watching me nervously. I wanted him to hold me. I needed him to make the first move. I don't want him to be scared either. 

Warmth spread through my body as he gently placed his hand on the side of my face. I let out a small cry as I placed my hand on top of his, wanting him closer. I looked up at him. "You do not scare me, Cassian. There is no one in this world that makes me feel safer than when I'm with you. And I am honored to be your mate." 

Cassian let out a cry of relief as he pulled me into his embrace. We both stood there in the snow, holding each other so tightly, crying with one another. After a few minutes he pulled away first, both his hands cupping the sides of my face now. His thumbs wiping away the few tears on my cheeks. "The honor is mine. And I will give you the everlasting love you deserve, for eternity."

"As will I," I reached up and wiped his tears also. "I will need your patience. I would like to go slow." 

Cassian's eyes went wide and he took a step back from me. "Of course." 

I laughed a little and grabbed his hand pulling him back to me. "This is just fine." He smiled and wrapped his arms around my waist. "And I would like you to kiss me." A blush formed on my cheeks as I said that. I hadn't kissed a male in over a century. 

"You sure?" He asked. I nodded slowly, he leaned in closer and when he was just mere inches away from my face I closed my eyes. Finally his lips found mine in an achingly slow, gentle kiss. He was holding me so softly, as if afraid he would hurt me. "You're it for me. I'm never letting you go." I leaned into his touch, wanting to be as close to him as possible. 

"Should we go back inside with the others?" I asked, nuzzling my face into his chest. 

"Yeah, we should." He replied but neither of us made an effort to move. "They're watching us from the window." 

I whipped my head around to look at the house behind me, multiple heads jumped away from the window. I laughed and shook my head. "They're always so nosey."

"Let's go. It's getting cold." Cassian and I held hands as we walked back inside. He took my cloak off for me and hung it up. Everyone was sitting at the table acting totally normal. 

I noticed Mor has taken my seat, pretending to be in a serious conversation with Elain. Rhys was trying to hide his smile behind his drink. Cassian pulled out the empty seat from beside him, allowing me to sit down before he took his seat. My face was red as a tomato but Cassian had a smug grin on his. They were all pretending like nothing happened, that this was all totally normal. 

"Did you guys know it started snowing outside again?" I spoke up finally, a smirk on my face.

 "What?" "No way." "I had no idea." They all said as a chorus. Then we all started laughing. Thank the mother for that. 

Cassian grabbed the edge of my seat and pulled me closer to him, wrapping an arm around the back of my chair. I grabbed his other hand and held it in my lap with both of mine. I need the connection.

"So did you all know?" I had to ask. I wasn't mad. I found it funny actually. 

"Know what?" Rhys asked, playing dumb. Then a devilish grin formed on his face. 

"I told Rhys the moment I knew, Az suspected the same day." Cassian told me. 

"I figured it out easily," Amren said, her arms crossed over her chest and a bored look on her face. "He stares at you constantly."

 "I do not!" Cassian said loudly and everyone laughed again.

"She does the same, don't worry." Mor smirked at me and my eyes went wide. 

"I do?!" I didn't even realize. My face was so red right now. 

"Oh, all the time," Feyre spoke up. Cassian squeezed my hand, begging me to look up at him. When I did his face was so full of happiness, my heart felt like it was melting. 

He leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Do I have permission to kiss your cheek?" I giggled, literally giggled. Who am I? Where did this side of me come from?

"You have my permission and may do so anytime you want," I whispered back. He kissed my cheek with glee. I was so happy. I loved the affection he was giving me. He was respecting my boundaries and accepting that I wanted to go slow. But I now understood that with me wanting to accept the bond he was gonna take any affection he could get from me. I wanted to give him everything but I need time. 

"I think we can all agree, Cass and Y/N, we are very happy for you both." Rhysand raised his glass to us. Everyone copied, raising their glasses as well. 

Acotar Masterlist

[noblehouseofgay]

Nowhere to go

Jegulus and Black Brothers microfic

Reg survives the cave

Longer than usual, I got carried away

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

He was bleeding out, he was sure of it. His blurry vision alone told him that he only had so long left.

He almost couldn't decide if he'd rather come here or just bleed out. But he did have some self preservation left, so here he stood at the Potter's door.

As far as they knew, he was an evil death eater. He knew there was a chance he'd be turned away or even killed on the spot. After years of turning down their invitations, what right did he even have to be here?

Unfortunately he couldn't change his mind. He all but collapsed against the door. This was it wasn't it? The Potters would find a corpse on their doorstep and not even know why. Well, at least he'd get to traumatize his brother one last time.

He felt the door open against his leg and he heard someone yell. He had no idea who it was or what was being said. He was blacking out fast. Ha, blacking out. Black. Oh I'm dying. His deluded thoughts ceased as he left consciousness.

~~~

Regulus shot up, breathing quickly. Where the hell was he? He remembered the cave. He remembered ordering kreacher to leave. He remembered.....oh merlin, he remembered being dragged down. Pulled beneath the water. He remembered being apparated. He didn't know how but he'd ended up on a street corner. And he remembered choosing to find the Potters. Oh fuck. He was at the Potters.

He looked around, quickly finding his brother asleep on the chair nearby. Sirius. Without thinking, Regulus began to reach out to him. He gently touched his brother's hand. He was real. He was here.

Sirius stirred and Regulus pulled his hand away. They made eye contact for the first time in years. "Reggie..." Regulus bit his lip. What was he supposed to say right now? How do you even explain this situation?

Apparently it didn't matter, because Sirius moved quickly to hug Regulus. Soon enough they were sobbing into each other. The embrace felt like home, something Regulus hadn't felt since he was 13.

"What happened to you? Did our parents do that-" Sirius pulled back, looking horrified. "I swear, Reggie you- you looked dead!"

"I know how to kill him." Sirius froze. "I know how to kill the dark lord. I already have one piece, I- I don't know how many there are- but he can be killed, Sirius."

Sirius looked beyond lost. "Reggie, slow down." He sighed. "I'm going to grab James and his parents, then you're going to tell us everything."

So he did. Regulus filled them in on what he could, all while avoiding James' eyes as much as possible. Even now, those eyes held so much power over Regulus.

After he'd told the story, Effie and Monty left to discuss, leaving the three boys alone.

The silence was thick. "I'm glad you're ok." Of course James would say that, he had a heart too big for his body. Regulus nodded in response, his feelings too overwhelming to speak.

"You're staying here, by the way, I hope that's obvious. I'm not letting you get away from me again, Reggie. You're not going back to that house." Regulus sighed and looked at his brother. He assumed that would be the case. "Fine, but I'll need to get kreacher to bring me things from there. I've done a lot of research on the horcruxes, it's all in my journals. Plus I had him take the locket since-..." He almost didn't want to say it again. "Since I didn't think I'd make it out. The plan was he'd take the locket and my studies to you. But I think he brought me here as well, I'm not sure."

"Well at least that bloody elf has done one good thing." "Watch it. He's helped me a lot, Sirius. He's loyal to be more so than the house of Black." Sirius rolled his eyes. "Fine. But I still don't like him." He stood up. "I'll go get your guest room set up, it's next to mine."

Well now this was just awkward. He was left with James, you know, the boy he'd spent years in love with. The boy he'd danced around and teased for years. The boy he never got the chance to be with. The boy he never thought would even look at him.

The Marauders' final year had changed a lot though. Regulus and James became closer than ever. That is, until Regulus had to distance himself for everyone's sake. They'd never even kissed. Never did more than give each other looks in the halls, really.

Regulus spoke quietly, not looking at the boy. "I had nowhere else to go, I-" he took a breath, "I really wouldn't have put all this on you if I'd had a choice." James carefully moved to sit next to Regulus, his hand lightly resting on his. "I'm glad you did, Reg. We didn't- we had no idea if you were even still alive. Neither of us had ever seen you on the battlefield, there were no reports of you." James fingers held Regulus hand gently. "This was your plan from the start?" Regulus nodded. "I understand why you didn't tell us...but I wish you could've. I wish we could've helped you."

Regulus swallowed, staring into those warm hazel eyes. "I didn't want to risk your lives. I did it to keep you as safe as I could. If you hated me...then you wouldn't try to save me." Regulus laughed a little sadly. "Yet here we are now, it ended up being your problem in the end anyway." "Hey, don't do that. We want to help, Reg. You've done so much. We can end the war now! Because of you..." James brushed some black strands of hair out of Regulus' face. "You're so brave, you know that?" The taller boy stood up and left a kiss on Regulus' head, leaving the smaller boy blushing like crazy. He smiled at Regulus and nodded for him to follow. "I'll take you to your room, you should rest."

Regulus stood and followed, in somewhat of a daze from that interaction. They went upstairs and found Sirius setting up the room, adding a few little details. Sirius smiled at his brother, something Regulus never thought he'd do again.

The two other boys nodded to Regulus and headed out, Sirius giving him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. "I'm right next door, Reggie. James is across from me, and the bathroom is at the end of the hall." James peaked back in from the hall. "And my parents are just down from me if you need them. Or us. Whatever you need, alright?" Regulus nodded with a small smile. "Get some rest, Reggie."

Regulus immediately laid down, feeling himself already being pulled into sleep. He was exhausted. Today had been forty hours long, he swore it. He'd almost died and reunited with his brother and James all in a few hours. There was a lot to deal with starting tomorrow, but for now he'd rest well, knowing his had those two back in his life.

[tyrantisterror]

A Dozen Or So Great Vampire Ladies

Ok, so, on a mostly unrelated post the topic of good vampire ladies came up, and @bisexualdaikaiju suggested/challenged me to do a top 10 vampire women list. As a self-professed lover of vampire women, it felt like a challenge I couldn't back down from. But it is kind of challenging, for two kind of contradictory reasons.

First, while there are MANY female vampires in fiction, most of them feel like afterthoughts, getting far less characterization than their male counterparts, who more often than not are the star villains of the show. When these supporting lady vampires do get something to do, it's generally the same role: make their human lovers sad when they rise from the dead as a monster that has to be killed, an emotional beat that is often undercut by a lot of these vampire women not getting much characterization to endear them to us before they died. Everyone wants to have the Lucy Westerna plot beat from Dracula but they don't want to do the work that Bram did to make Lucy lovable. The lady vamps who get to step out of Lucy's shadow are rare - but that just makes them all the more wonderful.

The second problem is that, since this is an obsession of mine that few seem to share (there are lots of vampire fans, but man do the boy vamps get to hog the spotlight among them), I've done a lot of scattered thinking about it and I just know I'm bound to forget at least one excellent lady vampire character that should be here. And whittling it down to ten, and trying to rank them? That's too hard! My thoughts are too mercurial to do that reliably in a way I don't forget!

So instead here's a list of, like, a dozen or so lady vampires that I think are just fucking stellar, many of which I think break the mold of what pop culture makes us expect lady vampires to be. It is not ranked - I love all these characters more or less equally, and think it's a lot more interesting to see how they take their archetype in different directions than to figure out which one is "best" of the lot.

Carmilla Karnstein

I'm going to start with the most famous literary female vampire, Mircalla Karnstein from Carmilla. I think she might be the first vampire to have an unhealthy obsession with using anagrams of her real name as aliases, though I'm sure now that I've typed that someone will find an earlier example to school me. She's also the one who popularized the idea of lady vampires being extremely sapphic, with an arguably genuine romantic affection for her female victims. She's got well-deserved clout, basically, and like Dracula has been adapted countless times and reinterpreted in some excellent ways. My favorite screen Carmilla is Ingrid Pitt's take, which captures her fierceness, passion, and tragic nature so well.

2. Amy from Fright Night

Ok, we're having one Lucy Westerna knockoff on this list, but as Lucy knockoffs go, Amy is one of the best. It actually helps that she spends 90% of her movie as a human, because we get to know and love her so much before she turns monstrous. And once she does...

It is pants-shittingly terrifying. I will never stop raving about the vampire designs in this movie - they made their "game faces" so fucking monstrous and I feel like in a better world this would be the standard ever since, especially since they still gave the vampires pathos while making them so ghastly when they've got their feeding faces on.

3. Drusilla

Buffy the Vampire Slayer had a bunch of vampire characters, and to its credit they did a decent job of making the ladies just as distinct as the gents. Harmony and Darla could both have made this list, but my favorite was always Drusilla, who was so traumatized before she became a vampire that it kind of overwhelms the demon spirit inside her. Like, bare minimum thing to make a lady vampire more interesting than 90% of other female vampires in fiction: give her at least one personality trait, preferably an interesting one, outside of being a vampire. Drusilla's fun, and she survives the entire series after dumping her boyfriend to be a single female vampire. Good for her.

4. Ruby from Scary Godmother

Ok look I am a fake Scary Godmother fan but kudos to the artist of the books for making a lady vampire who's very clearly of the nosferatu mold and is also explicitly benign and sweet. A+ vampire lady character design. I hope it doesn't awaken anything in me.

5. Nadja

What We Do in the Shadows is excellent at finding new takes on vampires in general - it even made me actually like Psychic Vampires as a concept, a feat I thought was impossible - but goddamn do I love Nadja specifically. She's got a distinct personality as vampire ladies go, being very confident and self-assured while also being a complete fucking goober (it is a comedy, after all). She's perfectly capable of being terrifying AND hilarious, often at the same time. A vampire girl failure, in the parlance of our site. I love her.

6. Lady Dimitrescu

I know that she's apparently only in a fourth of the game, but it's still pretty great that Resident Evil 8 decided its mascot villain - its equivalent of the Tyrant, G, Nemesis, etc. - would be the hottest woman I've ever seen a milf an 8 foot tall lady vampire. She's not dainty and willowy like most lady vamps in fiction - not an ambush hunter - but rather HUGE and capable of tossing a human around like a rag doll. She's a physical powerhouse and she looks fine feminine while doing it. Despite being an unabashed blood-sucking monster, she still has enough depth and complexity to have important relationships (like a genuine love for her "giant mass of hive mind flies" daughters), and also she gets to have an awesome transformation into a fungal vampire dragon, which is rad as hell. Also goddamn, her fashion sense is immaculate.

7. Hecate from Hellboy

"Hey, she's not a vampire! She's a goddess! That doesn't count!" Fuck you, my list, my rules. Hecate posits herself as the progenitor and mother of vampires, she drinks blood, and her main form in the comic is as a sicknasty lamia version of the iron maiden used by Elizabeth fucking Bathory, if she doesn't count as a vampire, nothing should. She is the concept of a vampire amped up to maximum capacity, a major mythological figure and an awesome villain.

...also I lowkey shipped her and Hellboy when I was a teenager. They could have made it work!

8 - 12. Carmilla and her girl squad from Castlevania

I suppose I could have counted Castlevania's Carmilla as an adaptation of Miss Karnstein - they're both basted out of Styria, both sapphic, and it's clear she's meant to be an adaptation of the former, just as the Dracula of this show is meant to be a take on Bram's famous vampire. But ultimately they're VERY different characters in the grand scheme of things - Castlevania's Carmilla has none of the tenderness and vulnerability of her literary counterpart, instead being full of barely restrained fury. She is an excellent villain, complex enough to be interesting but thoroughly despicable enough to make it VERY satisfying when she bites it.

I also love her girl posse... in concept, at least. They've all got great designs and the groundwork of interesting characters, but of the the three, only Lenore, the waifish redhead, gets to do much of note. The two on the edges kind of just show up for a few scenes and then bail before the plot catches up to them, doing very little of note - though at least the big hunky one gets one of the coolest fight scenes in the whole show.

Back to Lenore though - she gets a really nice character arc, and manages to become one of the few sympathetic vampires in the series (while still doing a lot of monstrous shit - she is not a defanged vampire by any stretch). I think her death scene is one of the most moving moments in the series finale.

13. Seras Victoria

A good female vampire has at least one non-vampire part of her personality, right? Ok, so, Seras is:

the muscle in almost every scene she is, which is to say, the one absolutely beating the shit out of people while her allies run for cover

the perky henchman/morality pet of one of history's greatest monsters

the sole ray of sunshine in cast of edgy, cigar-chomping grizzled mercnaries and antiheroes she's been pressganged into fighting alongside

the victim of some HIDEOUS trauma even before her vampirization

the protege of a wise master who gets a full hero's journey arc, taking up his mantle at the end of the series

Like, I love her. She's the secret protagonist of Hellsing. She's got layers like an onion. The scene where she killed Zora Blitz reminded me why I love anime.

(yeah it's the TFS version fuck you)

14. Youko Shiragami

My Monster Secret is not a horror manga. It is a romantic comedy about a bunch of idiots trying to keep painfully obvious secrets hidden and succeeding only because almost everyone around them is as dumb as they are, just in very different ways. It is a manga where an entire chapter can be summarized as "all the characters race to get the last McRib, using their various supernatural abilities to try and cheat their way to the front of the pack." It is one of the funniest and most heart-warming stories I have ever read, one of my favorite romances of all time, and an excellent piece of long form story-telling.

One of the two main characters is Youko Shiragami, a vampire girl who can't let anyone know she's a vampire or else her dad will pull her out of school. She desperately wants to have a normal life with friends and, like, school shenanigans, but her fear of people uncovering her secret and hating her is so immense that she's been isolating herself from everyone, accidentally torturing herself by being close to what she wants but unable to actually have it.

At least, until Kuromine, the other main character of the story, discovers her secret while trying to ask her out on a date. He ends up promising to keep her secret, and the two of them form a real friendship that blossoms into a very sweet romance, where Youko gets to display all her incongruous personality traits that go against what you'd expect of vampires - namely, that she's kind of a ditz, with an unrefined style of speech and a complete inability to be suave and seductive. She's a sweet, flaky goofball with a big heart, who just happens to drink blood and tan really quickly in the sunlight. There is no other vampire like her, and the world is richer for her being in it.

15. Marceline, the Vampire Queen

This list isn't ranked, but if it was, I'd put Marceline at the top. I think she is not only the most unique and deeply characterized lady vampire in fiction, but ranks right up there with Dracula in how she redefines the idea of what a vampire can be. Like, look at the forms she takes!

There are DOZENS of different monstrous shapes Marceline takes during Adventure Time's 9+ seasons of television, and any one of them would be a superb and memorable vampire on its own. And she's ALL of them. Just on a design standpoint, she is a standout. I think only Dracula himself could compete.

But she also explores what the concept of what a vampire is in ways no other vampire in fiction can, in part because of the unique nature of Adventure Time's setting. In a world where humans are an extreme minority and most people are weird monsters, a vampire isn't that odd, so we get to explore what being a vampire means divorced from the comparison to "normal" human beings. There's the expected tragedy to Marceline, of course - she's a 16 year old who has been stuck in that adolescent state for hundreds of years, and much of her character arc over the show (including the magnificent vampire-centric storyline, "Stakes") focuses on the horror of being stuck in that transitional state, not quite a child but not quite an adult. Marceline struggles to mature, to understand herself and others, and her vampirism both keeps her distant from reaching those goals but also gives her a lot of time to figure out how to approach them when the opportunity arirves. Marceline goes from one of the most immature and selfish characters in the show to perhaps the most emotionally intelligent, blossoming into a sensitive and thoughtful person she could never have been without first becoming a creature that seems so inherently opposed to ever having those traits.

And she did it all in a children's show where she was rarely if ever allowed to actually drink blood - a problem the writers got around by having her suck the red color out of things, which is right up there with the Joker Venom from BTAS in terms of genius ideas spawned by children's show censorship.

Marceline is the GOAT.

[dangerpronebuddie]

Ooh!! I love your wip, please do 😭📋📋📋🥵🥵🥵💙💙😎😎😎 thanks 🥰🥰

Hi darling thank you!!! 🥰🥰 So sorry I'm answering this like three weeks late, the words have not been wording. Scrolled through my asks last night and saw this one and wrote a lot more than I was expecting to. Thank you!

Verbal Abuse fic:

“Christopher said you're seeing a therapist again,” Helena says, her mouth a thin line. Eddie never bothered telling her about therapy. She doesn't believe it helps. “Yeah,” Eddie nods. “Have been for months.” “Pity you didn't start before you traumatized your son into running away,” she says, casual as anything.

Clipboard Buck fic (oh look, Maggie's projecting):

Eddie works his jaw in thought. He wracks his brain, trying to think of his first serious crush. That friend from highschool comes to mind, but he immediately skips over him to Shannon. Before her, there really wasn't anyone. He remembers his friends fawning over Leticia Montes in third grade. He didn't understand the draw. They didn't know her very well; she was in fourth grade. Eddie didn't know a thing about her. He supposes her dark curls and blue eyes were pretty, but there wasn't anything beyond that. There was a boy in sixth grade his friend Mary was practically in love with that, objectively speaking, was attractive. Eddie still didn't get it. Whenever his friends asked him who he liked, he'd think up the most well known heartthrob as his answer. Unfortunately, he had more than a few friends who would proceed to try and set them up. The refusals became degrading after a while. Eventually, he just stopped answering them. He lost those friends, but he didn't feel all that bad about it.

Sub Eddie fic (it's less than 3 lines but it's all my brain would allow me):

“Relax,” he says softly, pressing a kiss to his inner thigh. He doesn't say it out loud, but Eddie hears it all the same. The promise they've kept to each other for years: I'll take care of you, and I trust you to take care of me.

Tanis' fic:

“Fuck, you're beautiful,” Buck says in an awed whisper. For a moment, Eddie thinks he should shy away from the attention. But he doesn't want to. This is Buck. Buck hovers over him, bracketing his head with his forearms. Eddie tips his chin up for a kiss and Buck grins as he leans down. Heat engulfs whatever softness remained from moments before. Buck nips at his lips and licks deep into his mouth, rocking down hard against him as Eddie pulls him closer, closer, closer.

Big Damn Hero (I couldn't not include this moment):

“Yeah, or you know you could… you could have mine,” Buck stammers like an idiot. Eddie does that adorable snort and shakes his hand. “Deal.” Oh, Buck was in trouble. So. Much. Trouble.

Also using this as my WIP Wednesday!

Tagged by @tizniz and @daffi-990 who both shared AMAZING stuff y'all should show some love!! 💚🩵 (p.s. I'm sorry if I haven't interacted with some tags I've gotten recently. Life's been... life, and some days even tumblr is overwhelming. Love y'all and thank you for continuing to tag me 🩷)

Tagging:

@lover-of-mine @loveyouanyway @kitteneddiediaz

@ronordmann @steadfastsaturnsrings @inell @exhuastedpigeon @hippolotamus @diazsdimples

@thekristen999 @monsterrae1 @actuallyitsellie @diazheartsbuckley @wildlife4life @theotherbuckley

@rainbow-nerdss @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @lunarspark-cos @idealuk @shipperqueen6 @slowlyfoggydestiny

@misshiss727 @lin27 @jshadow01 @orangeboxfox92

@thegeekcompanion @emilybahu @lemotmo @awolfnamed-nyx

@kaseysgirl86-blog @darkrose6578 @totallynotagoraphobic @dandelioncasey @bibuckbuckgoose @whatsgoodinthehood22

@lady-elaine @buckley-diaz-rules @buddiedaydreamer911 @monroemary @pirate-hunter

@nonspeakingkiku @eddiedisasterdiaz @drunkandsupportiveeddie @traumabuddies @epicbuddieficrecs @elvensorceress @disasterbuck

@tofanasmuse @gnoeltop @keynb @cassi-brooks @-syrup-sue @punkrock00 @shannonhutchins @lasagnatheory

[rypnami]

boggart headcanons

this has been rotting my brain for a whiiiile. another completely unoriginal idea but this is my take on the HL npcs’ boggarts. spoilers if you haven’t finished the game!

sebastian: some say his boggart would take the shape of his uncle, or his uncle’s tombstone. in my opinion though, it would turn into a dementor. although what happened to him throughout his childhood was traumatic and horrible, his uncle can’t hurt him anymore. a dementor, however, certainly could. it’s a manifestation of his guilt over his actions and his fear of being sent to azkaban.

ominis: how does a boggart frighten someone who can’t see it? through sound. there are several things it might make itself sound like to scare ominis. perhaps his aunt before she died. the sound of the scriptorium door opening, mc/sebastian getting crucio’d, his father’s voice, his siblings’ voices… that poor boy has so much trauma that a boggart would have a hard time choosing.

imelda: this one seems very clear to me. the boggart would appear before her as the captain of the holyhead harpies, telling her she didn’t make the team. after all that work, after everything she tried to hard to achieve, she fell short of what she wanted more than anything. that’s scary. she fears failure above all, and that’s the epitome of failing for her.

garreth: i headcanon garreth as a very family-oriented person. we know he has at least 1 younger sister, however knowing the weasleys there are probably several more younger and older siblings. we also know that he loves potions experimenting and often has other people test them out. i think his boggart would appear as something awful happening to one of his family members as a result of trying one of his potions. two things he loves coming together and causing harm is probably the scariest thing to him.

leander: his boggart might he something kind of silly to everyone else. he definitely fears failure, loneliness, and being looked at as less-than. there’s a throwaway line he says about how his siblings are older, smarter, more competent etc so i think above all he fears being a disappointment. his boggart would most likely be his parents telling him he’s a failure, that he’s brought shame to his family, and things of that nature.

andrew: we don’t know much about andrew, but i think he’s the kind of person who has anxiety. i think he takes his house placement very seriously and fears letting down his friends/the people around him. his boggart would probably be his close friends or family members expressing that he had failed them in a big way and that they didn’t want anything to do with him anymore.

amit: through the game we see amit as someone who is somewhat timid but can be incredibly brave when he has to be- main example is the goblin mine quest. so i think in the aftermath his boggart would be a goblin, perhaps even ranrok himself, after the trauma he definitely sustained during that quest.

poppy: her boggart would either been one of/both of her parents, or something bad happening to highwing. we know she must have a lot of (likely unresolved) trauma from growing up in a poacher camp, especially with who her parents are, and after what happened with highwing in the high keep quest, she’s probably also incredibly worried about her closest (creature) friend being harmed again.

adelaide: no one talks much about her but i think she’s really sweet okay 🥺 anyway, if she were to see a boggart it would probably manifest as her uncle dying. she’s already lost her parents and, presumably, has no family left besides her uncle. save her she’s just so cute :((

also my mcs just for fun :D

jamie: a werewolf. after his mother’s death there is nothing in the world that will make him panic faster. a lot of his fear of werewolves also comes from the residual guilt that he was somewhat responsible for her death. perhaps the boggart would even switch into his mother’s werewolf form..

jack: definitely turns into his father. after everything he went through, especially as a child, nothing scares him more than his father. even tho he did kill him so there’s no true threat anymore. most of it is psychological torment now :D

ollie: when he was small, his boggart would have taken the shape of a spider. now, it takes the form of a dementor- he’s scared of them taking one of his dads away. although he’s still deathly terrified of spiders/acromantulas so perhaps it changes back and forth sometimes.

[badsweetangel]

My request was the last and my god! Not only did I love every paragraph, Toby's was my favorite because I imagined an almost identical scenario!

Only mine was that when Creepypasta!Reader broke into the family house, Toby's father pushed him towards Creepypasta!Reader so that he would kill him first and save himself and the father locked himself in a room. Then Creepypasta!Reader looks at him silently, Toby also looks silently (either in shock or scared) and Creepypasta!Reader gestures for him to move away, Toby does so, Creepypasta!Reader gives him a disposable cell phone to call to the police and tells him to lock himself somewhere, and while Toby was calling the police in the background, Creepypasta!Reader is heard kicking the door of the room where Toby's father was hiding and his screams at being killed.

(that's the end of my scenario and I didn't imagine a continuation, but maybe it would be in the style of Toby fanfics, you know, Creepypasta!Reader stalks Toby, breaks into his new home, harasses him, steals some things from him and leaves him others either stolen or taken from their victims as gifts, that kind of thing)

Predator (Normal!Toby x Creepypasta!Reader)

Thank you for your comments, are very helpful!

Warnings: Toxic relationship, mentions of murder, the reader is crazy

You could even feel like a good person and you kept thinking that maybe you had made a mistake. That thought didn't leave you alone, it haunted you and didn't leave you alone until you decided to take action. You knew how it worked, it was simple, you enter the house, you kill all the people inside without exceptions and you leave.

And then, oblivion.

And maybe this time you had gone too far with your decisions. You had left the boy alive, okay. You could deal with that. But not satisfied with that you kept thinking about him and that wasn't good at all.

It was a nuisance.

And suddenly it started to bother you, like a disease and it didn't go away easily and it was disturbing. The thoughts didn't stop and you started to close your eyes too tightly when you couldn't stop them from coming.

You had made a decision: you would kill the boy. It was the only way you had to solve things, because he wouldn't leave your mind and that wasn't good. If something enters the mind too strongly, it becomes a weakness and you couldn't have weaknesses. Not when you decided that this would be your life. Because yes, that was it, a decision; yes, it was made from traumatic events, but it was your decision after all.

You started lurking outside his house, his new house. Watching what he did, where he went and how his life was going; because that's how you would have the perfect moment. You saw everything, absolutely everything from there. He was so alone and you knew he felt that way.

Your thoughts weren't even good at noticing those kinds of emotions. You weren't one for emotions and you weren't one for empathy either. That's why you decided to see why you had decided to leave him alive.

And you didn't know it, not yet.

There was a moment when he noticed it. He knew you were there, watching him from the shadows. He didn't do anything. He saw what you were capable of doing. He saw his father dead in his own room, blood staining the sheets leaving behind everything he once was. And you were cruel, but at the same time you weren't. And that made him feel confused.

Still, he did nothing.

You had taken his father from him, he was angry and at the same time grateful. It was a perfectly constructed duality to keep his mind fixed on you. And he didn't know if it was okay anymore. He didn't know if it mattered either, because he had the faint feeling that he knew what you were coming for.

And he didn't care.

In fact, he understood.

And there was a moment when the tense atmosphere of the place changed and they both noticed it. Because you had changed your mind. Just like that, with the autonomy of a person who was no longer subject to social norms. He was weak, that was your reason, the reason you left him alive. He is someone who will find his predator at some point and you simply decided not to be you. But now you had decided. You would be. But you wouldn't kill him, maybe ordinary people would call it protection. But even with your twisted mind you knew that was not entirely true, protection never has ulterior motives and you were already far from having pure intentions.

You simply wanted to let him know. With gifts. Gifts for him. Yes, little trinkets that you found from your victims.

And he appreciated them.

He even appreciated the bloody fingers of that person who bothered him. From there he knew that there was a change in you, a different one, but he didn't know how to name it at first. He only knew that it was different from the original intention. He felt a difference, although he didn't know how different it was.

Once you entered his house. He didn't even move. You knew that he had analyzed your messages well, but he still looked unsure. Although such a feeling was brutally overshadowed by the indifference to his own life.

You had gotten bored of sending him gifts, although there were some more entertaining than others. Beyond material things, revenge on the people who bothered him was your favorite treat. But it was for something more selfish: seeing his reaction. How much he could be impressed.

But he had already grown tired of your mystery.

“Have you come to kill me?” He asked without further ado.

“I wouldn’t start with that part,” you answered.

You swore you saw him smile slightly.

[urpaperboy]

Desolation

A YV Fan Au created by me !! Mateo/urpaperboy !! :)

Hi !! So I made these doodles on the whiteboard that @itsargyle made and got going on here rn and well people were interested in me talking about it so here I am !!

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Welcome to Desolation, A Steampunk styled YV Fan AU !!

The Term Desolation means - a state of complete emptiness or destruction or anguished misery or loneliness.

This was fan product I created back in 2021 and have and continued growing along side a couple of my friends in the YV community, and while although I haven’t written anything about it, I know how both the story begins and ends. So let’s talk about that !!

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The Plot

Everyone has their beginnings, middles, and ends. Everyone's beginnings either start bright or tragic. In this story, we follow the life of Seth, one whose beginnings started both bright and tragic and ended bright and tragic too. Seth is the so called “proud inventor” of the town, ones who inventions are beloved by many people around him, including Alphonse, which Seth has grown to love and care for and hopes to have a future with. But when tragedy strikes amongst the two, it sends Seth down a path of Desolation. But to keep his beloveds memory alive, he invents what can only be his greatest creation and the possible escape from his grief. But with that, comes a price, that the two of them must face and pay with in Blood and Tears, and possibly Oil too.

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The Characters

Seth

- Seth in this AU of mine is the main protagonist of the story. He’s an inventor !! Again, the “proud inventor” of the town he lives in. He has made many things for everyone and even owns a small shop in the town where people can view what he is creating just by looking through a window. Although most see him as a bit of a weird person for focusing their life to the inventions, the entire town loves him !! He has made himself quite a popular one in the town. But of course, he faces his own struggles and grievances, especially now that he knows the man he fell in love with, is now gone. But with the creation of his biggest invention ever, he hopes that maybe his broken heart can be healed and made anew, but unfortunately not everyone gets that.

Alphonse/A.I.phonse

- Alphonse is technically a protagonist too but not in the way you expect. For the first few parts of the story he runs a small business of selling sugars and sweets, which is actually running very well. And (and this is completely obvious) he has a rather close relationship with Seth (hehe crush moment), but unfortunately, his story comes to an end. But when tragedy strikes, something new blooms.

Meet A.I.phonse, A Robot created in Seth’s image in the hopes to keep a small resemblance of Alphonse alive, sounds a bit psycho but I promise it’s not. Throughout the story, he is there to help Seth Process his Grief, and help him attempt to continue with His Life. He learns like a newborn child in the world, he learns about life and other things. But as he grows, the realization of existence begins to become his biggest question.

Finn/Jack

Finn and Jack are one of the closest friends Seth. They are the one who help him out whenever Alphonse can’t. Finn has his flower shop which Jack works in too. When Alphonse dies, The Two boys make it their goal to at least keep Seth happy, although it is rather difficult considering Alphonse literally dies in Seth’s Arms so it was a rather traumatic experience and definitely difficult to try and keep someone happy after that. But although the challenge is difficult, they keep trying, because who wants to see their friend sad?

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These are the other characters that are in the story but can’t really write much about at the moment

- Charlie

- Derek (he’s obviously a the antagonist)

- Jessie

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That’s currently what I can share so far !! I’ll post a character line up of all the characters when I fix them up and actually do it soooo yeah !!

If you have any questions for me about this AU, my inbox is open, I’d be happy to answer these questions !!

- Mateo ⭐️

[birdiebirdjay]

controversial opinions on characters? (specifically harry potter)

hi anon! thanks for the ask :)

hmmmm i have quite a few

i don't like luna lovegood. i think she's very irritating as a person and i would absolutely go batshit if i had to interact with her in real life. she is the wizard equivalent of a flat earther and an anti vaxxer, not a spiritual guide. hermione wasn't narrow minded for doubting her and xeno, they were the narrow minded ones for never questioning their beliefs despite the MOUNTAINS of evidence against them. rahhh she makes me so angry. (i hate that i have to specify, but this isn't misogynistic, i would feel the same if she was a guy.)

lucius malfoy is a relatively harmless guy, he's just slippery. he gives me such peacock vibes. he just wants to show off and look rich and not be questioned. (also he def dotes on narcissa and draco which is adorable to explore in fics <3 i think he would be an amazing father to a little girl and would have loved a daughter which i like exploring in my fics, but that's just a headcanon)

draco is the same way, i feel. iirc he's usually too scared to start shit unless crabbe and goyle are there, he just makes me laugh tbh. of course he does do and say some shitty things but i am just. unable to take him seriously. this may be because i haven't thought about his character in a while, but as of right now, i don't really see him as evil OR a sympathetic little boy. he's just. a little dude. (he is more dangerous than his father though, i'll give him that.) i mean if marauders stans are allowed to glorify james potter and put him on a pedestal, i'm allowed to have this.

percy weasley! i love percy so much, i think this is an uncommon opinion but i don't really know. i think he's amazing, i've already talked about him a lot on my blog so ye :)

i think the weasley family is dysfunctional asf. i don't think i personally can explain it, but this post by @/arkadijxpancakes does a great job of comprehensively analyzing their history and dynamics as well as showing why each weasley is the way they are. super good read!

albus dumbledore: i don't know why this is controversial but i actually think he was a good character, all things considered. yes, he did some bad things, but they were to help save the wizarding world in the end. he set it all up.

severus snape: i think he's awesome, deserved WAY better, and was a traumatized character who is severely overhated. please don't try to fight me on this, you'll just give me a headache.

lily evans: this is a very new opinion of mine but... i don't think she was a great person. i used to wonder 'how could james potter, a shitty little twit twat, end up with such a wonderful and kind and amazing person?' but i've come to realize, she's really not those things. she was kind of a shit friend from what we know. i still think she's very interesting, but not necessarily a good person.

harry potter!! i want to include him because i think that quite frankly he is an awesome little dude but is super underrated and borderline disliked by a big part of the fandom. though i personally feel like he could have been written better in some ways, i still love him tons and i think he deserves more appreciation <33 (also i adore the idea of an oddly specific au where percy and oliver team up to take care of lil tiny first year harry)

neville longbottom: this may be the most controversial one yet but i just don't feel the hype. i feel like he was largely unimportant in the first six books besides as a side character (but it's been a while since i read most of them, so correct me if i'm wrong) and yeah he was cool in the seventh, but like... i still don't feel it. he was pretty boring imo. i think i logically understand why he's loved, but i don't personally relate :/

(canon) james potter: hate him. -100000000/10. he can go die. (OH WAIT HE ALREADY DID!) i'm sorry, i just cannot like him. fanon james is awesome and super cute and lovable, but fanon james is a whole different person than canon james. if we compare young severus to harry, james is dudley dursley in literally every way. rich, privileged, gets away with everything, and loves picking on powerless and vulnerable people for fun. the only difference is that james potter tended to do it with a partner/group, and dudley could do it on his own. oh, and dudley apologized, i guess. it was pretty half assed but we did see him trying to be better with the teacup and stuff. they both suck, obviously, but at least dudley had a slight turning point. maybe i just don't like james because we never saw him be apologetic or regret anything in canon? idk.

cho chang: i honestly really liked her! i thought she and harry could have been super cute ever since i read the third book. now obviously valentines day of 1996 was a disaster, but i still think that if she and harry had met up again after the war and after they had figured themselves out, they could have sort of talked and apologized and moved on and possibly rekindled. idk, this isn't really as ~controversial~ as some of the others because i feel like cho chang is just more forgotten than unpopular or controversial, but i don't see a lot of charry content out there so i'm putting this here :]

one last thing i almost forgot, VIKTOR KRUM IS A FUCKING CREEP!! i used to be more hesitant about voicing this opinion because he's so loved in the fandom, but GOD DAMN he's a creep. as a famous, rich, popular adult, he asks out a 15 year old and is super nice to her and appreciates her intellect and is generally very sweet to her, but that just. that literally just sounds like grooming to me?? wtf?? i mean if i was asked out at 15 by an 18 year old, i would be VERY creeped out. also he comments on how attractive ginny (15 at the time) is at bill's wedding when HE IS IN HIS 20s. he then makes a comment along the lines of 'what's the point of being famous if all the good looking girls are taken?' HEY HERE'S AN IDEA, FIND A WOMAN INSTEAD OF A GIRL??

there's gotta be more controversial opinions i have but no one else comes to mind right now; feel free to request opinions on specific characters! i have a lot of those :]