#these questions make me big think
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Will we see more erlang later in the comic? Since wukong and erlang are close friends in the book? Plus wukong takes up erlangs nephew as a disciple after jttw
Yes we will see more of Erlang in the future, to what capacity I'm still not sure, but he'll be thereš
So about Chenxiang, I had to first look him up since I was like whoa a disciple of Wukong I gotta see this! And based on his origin story, I don't think he'll be in my story as Wukong's disciple (maybe? Hell make cameos probs)
Why? Well based on how he became a disciple of Wukong was (very simple summary moment):
1) His mom, Erlang's sister, fell in love with a mortal man and had Chenxiang with him.
2) Mom gave mortal man the Lotus Lantern which is like a big important artifact and the Jade Emperor was like Hey! You can't do that! Go Erlang beat them up or somethin
3) Erlang killed guy and sealed Mom under mountain, and kidnapped Chenxiang
4) Chenxiang escaped and stole back the Lotus Lantern and began his journey to his mom
5) Sun Wukong finds him and is like Yo this kid kinda cool lemme help him, and trains him for a few years before taking him to the mountain his mom is at and giving him(?) a weapon able to split the mountain open
6) Erlang pops up and him and Chenxiang fight each other
7) Chenxiang wins
8) He frees his mom and they're happily ever after me thinksš
So now that we have this summary,,
If we take out the Jade Emperor because Wukong nerfed that guy...a big part of Chenxiang just doesn't happen because Erlang doesn't have a reason to go after his parents (based on the interpretation) and so he doesn't have to go through a journey.
He can still meet Wukong though so there's a possibility he might still become a disciple of him but idk right now, he'd have to decide to go to the celestial realm firstš¤š¤
#lmk#sunset!au#ttm!au#time traveling monkey au#lmk sun wukong#lmk erlang#lmk chenxiang#these questions make me big think#i love them#chenxiang is most likely gonna make a cameo but i might add him as someone who follows Erlang and learns from him#have an actual positive relationship with the guy#or he could become and assistant to Wukong as the Emperor#so many choices#me info dumping really makes me seem like a liar from the previous post#but i just read a summary like an hour agošš
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So, a few days ago I found this post on Reddit from 2 years ago (that sadly barely got any attention at the time) that sheds a ton of light on the separation scene between Gon and Killua, and my mind is blown! I've known for years that there was some sort of Togashi "coding" in the dialogue and it was always like I could get halfway to understanding, but this post gives the rest of the puzzle pieces that I was missing, and ties into other scenes that I was uncertain about the meaning of as well. It's heartbreaking, but also hopeful for their future! I had to share it with you all. Please read it!
The original Reddit post has been deleted, but here is a link to the author's Reddit profile. (I received permission from the original author to post this here.)
In-Depth analysis on the Hidden Reasons behind Gon & Killua's separation scene (ep 147) Why Gon is 'Number 2'
The translations across the separation scene in both manga (chp 338) and the anime (ep 147, 2011) have some shortfalls. These dialogues are vital for understanding even the first layer of reasons behind this separation.
REASONS FOR KILLUA'S DELICATELY PLANNED SEPARATIONĀ
1. WHEN -
There are very important reasons why Killua picked a specific timing to tell Gon about Alluka. It was Killua's plan all along, to only tell Gon at a moment's notice, to make sure Gon wonāt get time to ask any DETAILS. He is deliberately downplaying the seriousness of everything heās been through to heal Gon, so it will have less impact on Gon, and at the same time, avoid Gon asking details.Ā Prior to healing Gon, Killua specifically asked Morel and Leorio to promise not to tell Gon that he saved him. After Gon was healed, there was a scene in the anime (ep 148) which showed the three spent a night together before reaching the World Tree. During that time, Killua still haven't said anything. It wasn't until the moment when they were literally saying the last goodbye, Killua casually brought up:
āOh, by the way, this guy healed you."
I want to emphasis the word Killua used to address Alluka was āććć¤ā. This is a very light and overly casual word used to address someone you know, and usually a playful guy friend (e.g. āThis guy used to be my neighbour.ā type of feeling). The manga and anime translation, āSheās the one that healed you,ā did not clearly depict the intentional casualness.
2. WHAT was SAID -
If Killua just doesnāt want to burden Gon with guilt and responsibility, then why not just keep his mouth shut and say nothing? Thatās because Killua found a better option than not telling Gon anything. Killua shifted the āpriority of reasonsā a bit, so the VERSION OF EVENTS he told Gon, was PRIORITIZED on Allukaās rescue rather than healing Gon. This way, they will also get to THANK Gon, and put an emphasis on thanking Gon because Killua make it SEEMED like it was more important to rescue Alluka, that the INITIAL REASON for Killua to go home, was to rescue Alluka. Only AFTER Alluka was freed, they came to the hospital to heal Gon, out of convenience, since only Alluka has the ability to do so, and since sheās now outside. The MAIN motive for these past events has been delicately swapped around by Killua, so the focus switched to the rescue of Alluka, rather than healing Gon. Hence Alluka is āNo. 1ā, Gon is āNo. 2ā. Downplaying it so healing Gon was just a bonus convenience (ep 147, 19:12 to 19:51).
Killua then goes on another level to make this version of events seem even more realistic, by saying āā¦.You owe me a lot now,ā in a teasing and playful tone of voice. This is to again, downplay the seriousness of everything heās been through, to comfort Gon that "Yes you owe me one now, but donāt you worry! I will make sure you pay it back okay?! Hehe!ā
3. WHY -
The fight with Pitou allowed Killua to witness Gon's ultimately immature mind set when it comes to ārepaying someone, and redeeming himself.ā Kite lost an arm and his life to protect him. So Gon gave his life and was even more happy when Pitou took his arm too. Gon will always want to āmatchā what was sacrificed by another, by throwing away AT LEAST the same. Not āsacrificingā, but THROWING AWAY. Itās so immature, so dangerous, no one will be able to keep up with him. Killua was very confident with how much he could take, but even Killua himself is at limit. This ultimate baka!! (ep 136, 17:50 - 20:17)
If this is how far Gon will go for Kite, he can only imagine what Gon would go recklessly into if he knew the DETAILS. This is when Killua decided on a way to part with Gon the way they did, and to PROVIDE him a particular REASON.
āIām prepared to spent the rest of my life protecting her.āĀ
This is the reason Killua wants Gon to know, but NOT what he actually wants to do with his life. Although itās true he feels responsible and genuinely wish to protect Alluka and Nanika, but itās not what he ultimately WANTS to do. He NEEDS to protect Alluka, but he WANTS to spent his entire life by the side of a certain bakaā¦
After the previous events, Killua was traumatized, especially when he saw Gon's twisted decaying arm. That was a breaking point for him, after that, the only thing that matters THE MOST for him is for Gon to be safe. He also realized that in order to protect this baka... itās better if he keeps a distance for now, until he finds a solution to keep Alluka safe from Illumi and his family.
4. THE PARTING -
By planning this parting with Gon, Killua hopes Gon will become detached from him. And that time and distance will slowly render him less important to Gon. So if he was to die... (because Illumi is hunting them down) he did for Alluka, he did it for the vow to protect Alluka, not Gon. We knew Killua always plans ahead, and here, he plants this reason for Gon in the future so he wonāt need to feel responsible if he was to die protecting Alluka (or die with Alluka while Illumi is hunting them). This is whatās going through Killuaās head:
āIf I die, youāre not responsible for anything. You donāt owe me anything, so NEVER throw your life away again. My only one wish, is for you to be safe. So here I am. Iām parting ways with you... Because I SAID you are only ... No. 2 ... I SAID you are not the most important to me.. So donāt think of me as the most important to you tooā¦.ā
This, is Killuaās eternal Devotion.Ā
5. THE RESULT -
As a result of this deliberate planning by Killua,
Gon was made to believe:
While I was recovering in hospital Killua had to go home and rescue his sisterĀ
Alluka is such a cute sister and she can grant Killua any wish?!!! Wowā¦thatās one cool sisterā¦
Wellā¦ no wonder Killua thinks his cool sister is more important than me, itās only natural.Ā
Looks like Killua finally found what he wants to do. He will enjoy traveling the world with such a cool sister, it will be so much fun. I should be happy for him, I canāt hold him here... I have to let him goā¦
VS
The DETAILS omitted:
Gon was not recovering at all in the hospital. Killua RESORTED to USE Alluka in order to heal Gon.Ā
Allukaās blood stained dark past and the risks and uncertainty that still involves.
Baka Gon is always No. 1 !
Killua and Alluka are desperately trying to find a way to out of Illumiās grasp. Illumi is hunting them down and trying to make Killua his puppet again. And this time it's not going to be just a needle in the head... Killua can feel it. And if things doesnāt work out, he will just kill Alluka.
These Reasons are the core of the separation. We have a song named āReasonāā¦ arenāt the lyrics shedding a new layer of light now?
6. IMPORTANT WORDS ALLUKA USED TO FACILITATE A BETTER RELATIONSHIP AFTER REUNION -
Killua promised to āalways be togetherā with Alluka.
But to this promise, Allukaās response was always silent (episode 145, 3:32 to 4:19). She looked at Killua with deep thought. Because even in such a short amount of time, she realized Killua is doing all this to ALSO or MORE SO protect Gon. It was never just for her, it will never be just for her, and there will never be anyone more important than Gon for Killua. Sheās moved by Killuaās devotion and resolve, and she can also feel his sadnessā¦Ā Ā
If, the situation was different, if Gon was never there to begin with, and Killua just happened to solely come to Allukaās rescue, and then make a promise to stay together with her forever, Allukaās natural reaction will be melting with happiness, sheād be crying tears of joy, and hugging Killua. But in this instance, she was composed, she sensed her brotherās deep seriousness and sadness. Thatās why later on, she reassured the two at parting, that they will see each other again, without disclosing Killuaās true REASONS.Ā
The Exacted words Alluka used (Manga chpt 338, 2011 anime epi 147)
a. Manga translation: āIām going to HUG my brother for a while and then I will LET HIM GO.āĀ Ā
b. Better translation: āIām going to have my brother all to myself for a while and then I will let him free.āĀ Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā
c. The exacted phrase: āIām going to Monopolise my brother Exclusively for a period of time, then I will Release him.ā
ē¬ćå Ā (Monopolise Exclusively)Ā
Very strong characters with Explicit meaning. Have it all to oneself. Same characters and meaning used in Chinese as well.Ā ļ¼ē¬å ļ¼
č§£ę¾Ā (Release)Ā
This is much more formal and serious than ālet goā. It implies the subject was initially bound/locked/restricted. Also the same characters and meaning used in Chinese.
Alluka employed these words to imply a forceful lead in this ādealā of owning Killua exclusively. These words have an underlying tone of enslavement.Ā
Why? Because Alluka knows, the harder she IMPOSES herself on Killua during their time together, the more effective it would be on the easing of Killuaās own guilt.Ā
Killua felt immensely guilty.
No one will enjoy a relationship bound by guilt.Ā
Alluka knows clearly that part of her brotherās promise, was formed with guilt, from using her and Nanika, that he was having fun with Gon while Alluka was literally forgotten. Although it's true that this was largely due to Illumi's manipulation, but the fact that he did just left her in the basement all this time was both unacceptable and unforgivable to Killua himself (episode 138, 13:28).
Therefore apart from protecting Gon, this was the other important reason for this separation. Almost as if Killua has accepted this as a befitting price to pay in order to redeem himself as a brother.
Alluka and Nanika have no condition nor demand in return for Killuaās requests. But Killua imposed a price on himself for having Gon healed. Out of guilt. Alluka knows, Nanika knows. Thatās why Alluka usedĀ the word č§£ę¾ (release), because it will make Killua feel better, that he has complied with her āenslavementā, so when the time comes, Killua will be able to release HIMSELF from guilt, and go back to Gon, properly. Alluka loves her brother, and sheās prepared to help him towards a better relationship with Gon in the future, by helping him to eliminating this chain of guilt.
lol Alluka totally ships Gon and Killua ! XD
Thank you for reading.
#hunter x hunter#hxh#killugon#gonkillu#gon#killua#alluka#meta#PLEASE read this post if you have lingering questions and confusion about the separation!#like most of us do!#I think it's incredibly helpful and explains so much#having this makes a big difference to me in how I interpret the meaning and reasons for the separation#and what Togashi did and did not tell us with it
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what an incredibly normal and not at all autistic thing to say! (lying)
#truly this is SO funny#casually questioning his bestie's religious beliefs and then genuinely being like āwhat?? did i say something??ā#and then he KEEPS GOING with that train of thought#not because hes an asshole. in his head he is genuinely just making conversation. theres just something so autistic about him#also complete tangent but is it just me or is that glass of water between hotch and jj massive. is it the communal water cup or something#why is it so big#full disclosure these images are slightly out of order. the last image here is before hotch and jj's reactions#but it was funnier to order them like this#reid: hmm morgan do you think the reason youve never feared satan is because youve never actually believed in god?#everyone: ...#reid: :)#spencer reid#autistic spencer reid#not fic#criminal minds#criminal minds rewatch#criminal minds s03e08#lucky#this is NOT a hate post by the way. pre-diagnosis i absolutely would have done this.#even now knowing people consider it offensive i could see myself saying something like this#shoutout to offputting autistic people!!#criminal minds 3x8
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If somebody in your life offers to knit or crochet or, really, create anything for you, please be an active participant in the creation of the piece they are making. I adore making and gifting things, but nothing bums me out quicker than a person who passively just goes "okay," to my ideas about what I'm making them - it can send the message that they won't like it, or that they don't care, even if they're happy about my offering. The back-and-forth feedback is a great way to make sure that you are being gifted something that was truly worth the time, effort, expertise, and money that will inevitably go into the gift!
I know it's really hard to be an active participant, believe me, I'm an anxious ball of horror, but it will only do good for both parties to interact in this situation. It is a big deal to be offered a hand-crafted gift, but it's also something we want you to love and use, and that can only happen if you tell us what would make you fall in love with what we create.
#advice#relationships#art#fiber art#knitting#crochet#i always try to remember that some people's responses to something big is to clam up and become more passive...#..i just want to remind you that you aren't in danger of Ruining Everything by suggesting things or asking questions or saying what YOU wan#like i asked my dad specifically how he would feel if i made him items SPECIFICALLY so i could gauge if he would like them for instance#i don't just want to create something i want the recipient to actually LIKE it#which is why i typically (not always) ask how somebody would feel about me giving them a specific gift#i know some people genuinely don't care in the sense that they would appreciate ANYTHING but sometimes that doesn't always translate i gues#im crocheting a set of coasters for my dad and i really hope hell truly like them because i'm not sure based on how he responded to my ideas#it makes me so happy to gift things but it's with the caveat that the recipient will think it is An Amazing Gift That Is SO Good And Useful
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just sitting here giggling at the idea of loki seeing mobius shirtless for the first time, seeing his top surgery scars, not really understanding where they came from since theyāre a god shapeshifter and just use magic to alter their body
they trace them with their thumbs and just look at mobius, serious concern on their face, and they just ask, āwho did this to you?ā
and mobius bursts out laughing like, āme, girl.ā
#lokius#loki laufeyson#mobius m mobius#gjdjfhshd the power went out at my place and iām at my sisters#thinking about trans masc mobius#my beloved#and his gender-fluid shape shifting god partner who means well#this heat is making the brainrot worse tbh#t4t lokius save me#trans masc mobius#this is gonna need a tag of its own now i know it#season 1 mobius not really questioning why he had chest scars and not really caring#because the big picture and the sacred timeline and time keepers blah blah blah#oh no now iām having Trans Mobius Thoughts post him finding out about being a variant#iām a huge fan of mobiusā crisis of faith in s2 and now i need to add Gender Stuff to it jfjshfjhsd#please help me
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Do you ever think about how, even before this generation of fairytales, it was a well known fact that if you dont follow your destiny you will case to exist and die?
Do you ever think that knowing this Red and Wolf still went against their destiny ? Knowing that loving each other means that they are putting themselfs in a deadly danger?
Do you ever think about how two teenagers loved each other more then they feared death?
Do you think that after highschool they lived thinking any moment could be their last? Did they thought that if they are going to die becouse of their love at least they can die married?
Maybe after they got married and nothing happend to them , only then did they started living like they had time and dared to imagine them growing old together.
#oh well#that was enough from me for tonight#dont you think?#JUST SO I MAKE IT CLEAR#ASHLYNN AND HUNTER STARTED DATHING AFTER RAVEN QUESTIOND DESTINY#BECOUSE OF RAVEN THEY HAD COUREG FOR GOING AGAINST DESTINY#RED AND WOLF DIDNT HAVE ANYONE TO QUESTION DESTINY#class of classic has a maraders effect on me#you know#like when at start you are obsessed with the main characters#and then with thier parents#i just might start a side blog just for class of classic memes and incorecct quotes#mmm#still thinking about it thou#ever after high#class of classics#red riding hood#big bad wolf#eah badwolf#eah parents#eah
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#i am... redesigning some of my buggies#specifically me bee#my bumble beast in combo with the bee sona i made last year...#reblog for sample size if u want this isnt an important question#i am thinking abt the logistics of including support for itty bitty anthros that would be really Small#(like rodents and small lizards and bugs)#in an average to way above average anthro society#OR to just make it simple and make em all human range sizes#but#thats BORING#i need.... little houses for little beasts... and BIG houses for BIG beasts... and everyone is very casual abt it all because thats just#the way it is#anyways#im done rambling 4 now catch u all on the furry world building 2 electric boogaloo#this poll prolly wont effect what i do personally but it did make me curious what other ppl think
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I have some major gripes with the premise of 'Day of the Diesels' and honestly think it could be fixed if, for once, the stale 'Steamies vs Diesels' plotline had been disregarded and the movie actually showcased the diesels in a more sympathetic light.
I'm not here to say characters like Diesel, Arry & Bert, and Diesel 10 are completely blameless in their acquired bad rep. Lets face the fact, they're deceitful, have a rather aggressive approach to things, and more often than not they are out to cause trouble for others because they think it's funny.
But come on man... Going for the same kind of storyline where Steam Engines and Diesel Engines are at each other's buffers just for the fact they're different types of engine is kind of lazy at this point (especially considering the fact this was done before in 'Calling All Engines').
Wouldn't it be much more compelling if, for once, the diesels actually do have a rightful reason to be causing a ruckus (their home is decrepit, unsafe and lacks basic amenities for maintaining them) and (because they feel like they can't be upfront about their concerns due to their past misbehavior), they end up making this grand convoluted scheme that goes terribly sideways, but that ultimately gives way for some actual exploration of why Sir Topham Hatt's management of the diesels feels so underwhelming in comparison with the great care he takes in tending to his steam engines?
It could even be that the fat controller doesn't realize he's neglecting them a bit because he's so focused on trying to keep the steam engines from ever wanting for more (I mean, the time of steam has come to an end in the mainland, so of course he'd be worried about the future of his beloved steam engines he's had for so much longer!).
On a logical standpoint, it's considerably easier to get diesels and new parts for diesels nowadays, so Sir Topham Hatt would postpone something he feels like can be done in the snap of a finger versus something that might potentially take much too long... And that's the mistake here.
The fact the diesels can get new stuff so easily but don't, could be the crux of the issue. Prioritization, procrastination and perhaps a bit of forgetfulness and obliviousness to the mess one has made...
#Thomas and Friends#TTTE#Day of the Diesels#I wouldn't mind a rewrite of the movie where Diesel 10 is the protagonist and it dawns on him that his behavior is impacting the others#So he tries to fix things in the only way he knows how to and screws up anyway#but in doing so he actually manages to point out a glaring issue in the fat controller's management of the railway#it's so easy to think the fat controller treats all engines equally#but the state of the dieselworks put that into question for me#and the plot of big world big adventures does prove thomas is his favourite#I'm not saying he's the villain here just that he's human and humans make mistakes through poor handling of many tasks and a bit of bias#he grew up with steam engines it's only normal he's trying to adjust to handling diesel engines and not being as aware of their needs#also thomas is straight up an asshole in this movie and not the funny cheeky little shit we love#they mishandled his character so badly#(cameo from milfcutlawquane in this she had to suffer through this movie with me)
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even after all these years the gang learning about noahs ghostliness is so funny to me. like obviously they are freaked out that their friend is dead and was murdered. but no one is having a revelation about ghosts being real its not even mentioned. its like yea yea we all accept the existence of ghosts. back to the one living in our apartment.
#obviously the fact that the realization is adams perspective is wonderful especially w him being the biggest skeptic#and i have a post w that already#but even hes like not at all surprised ghosts are real#and its so interesting that other than the corpse road spirits noah is the only real ghost we hear about in trc#parsifal is a possible ghost but to me itās ambiguous whether carmen was inserting him into her life bc he was such a big influence that he#comtimues to do so beyond grave in her mind bc her decision making is still so influemced by him and his death#or she just doesnt have the sight but can tell hes interacting w her world#of course that brings in the question of what are ghosts but i literally had yall fill out a survey on that soooo beyond the current point#what do you guys think? is parsifal a real ghost? are there other ghosts in series?
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itās the sound that tips him off.
itās late, half-past hell by his last count, and mactavish knows there shouldnāt be a single soul in the showers this time of night. though heās sure if he asked, heād be told a soul isnāt in there.
just a ghost.
he almost chokes on the thick steam filling the locker room; humid and hazy and the perfect cover. or it would be, if the man collapsed in the far stall cared about hiding.
mactavish hates himself a little for the low sigh that falls from his lips. he wishes he wasn't so disappointed; that the promises he's heard over and over and watched be broken as many times hadn't wedged their way into his heart and convinced him that maybe, maybe this could be the time it sticks.
he doesn't know what's worse; the disappointment or the lack of surprise.
he holds his breath through the steam and leans over the limp body; stinging hot water hitting his back, instantly soaking through his clothes and already starting to burn. he flicks the tap enough to take the bulk of the heat out and straightens; a groan startling out of the man beneath him at the sudden lash of tepid water.
mactavish crouches, knees clicking and hooks a hand under his bicep to pull him up straight against the wall. if there was any vomit on his skin, it's been washed away by the pelting stream and he supposes he can count himself lucky for that. he tilts his limp head back and slips his fingers into his mouth; holding down his tongue and ignores the way it lazily jolts under his fingers to check his airway.
clear.
another small victory.
mactavish pulls his fingers out and cups his chin, keeping him tilted up and moves in the way of the water again so he can pull at his eyelid.
the eye he's met with is cloudy, so dilated there's hardly a ring of blue left.
he sighs again; hand falling away and letting his eye fall shut. "god damnit, riley."
riley moans, all his weight resting on the hand holding his jaw.
"aye, 'm talking ābout you," he grunts tiredly.
he lets riley's head fall forward to grab his arm, pulling him away from the wall to sit behind him; propping his body up against his chest. he leans his head back over his shoulder, keeping his face out of the water and his airway open just in case he hasn't actually finished throwing up.
he takes the rag riley'd half-managed to soap up and mechanically runs it over him; cataloguing new bruises and cuts and checking if the old ones are healing. sickly yellow fingerprints ring his hips, red splotches paint his ribs; too new to have settled into the deep purple he knows theyāll become.
riley slowly makes more noise as he rubs life into his body; still lying limp against his front but his head's starting to roll restlessly on his shoulder. he swipes between his legs and carefully doesn't think a single thing about what he finds.
"sean?" he rasps and mactavish's hand stills; eyes falling shut. he bites his check, hand clenching around the rag tight enough to shake and breathes hard out his nose.
he doesn't say a word, just forces himself to go back to cleaning.
he's not sure what would come out of his mouth if he did.
riley isn't conscious enough to hear him anyway.
he runs his fingers over his inner elbows for tracks and manages to muster some relief when he doesn't find any. seems to be a pill and booze night; far from the worst condition he's found him in.
he rinses him off, running a curtesy hand over his shaved head only for it to fall back to his jaw; his thumb stroking over the thick scar carved into his cheek.
"you gotta stop doin' this," he whispers.
he isnāt sure if heās talking to riley or himself.
mactavish gathers up riley's too-light body into his arms and turns off the shower. his head lolls into his throat and he throws a towel over his dripping body and another over his shoulder. it doesn't stop him from tracking water all the way to his quarters but he'd like to see someone try to put in a complaint about it.
he lays out the other towel on the bed and sets riley down; moving his body into the recovery position in an all-too familiar routine. he dries him enough that he won't soak the covers as he pulls them up to his chest and kicks the waste bin within grabbing distance of the bed.
he goes to pull off his sodden clothes when a different noise makes him freeze.
a low sniffle.
mactavish slowly turns back to the bed to find riley's eyes squinting open; glazed with tears as he kneads at the covers.
he stares at him for a moment as he looks around the room and those hazy eyes lock on him for the first time. "cap'n?"
he swallows. "aye; s'just me, riley."
his hand pokes out from under the covers and for all the promises he's made himself - all the ānever againās and āthis is the last timeās - at the end of the day, he's weak.
he sits on the side of the bed and takes riley's hand in his; already so cold after nearly boiling himself alive.
"y' mad a' me?" he sniffs.
mactavish runs his tongue over his lip and slowly shakes his head. "no, i'm not mad at you."
"prom'se?" he pushes.
he reaches out and caresses his temple with his thumb. his hand almost covers his head and it cuts like a knife to remember just how small riley is. "aye," he says, hushed. "i promise."
riley's eyes fall shut, voicelessly murmuring 'promiseā to himself over and over.
"Iāll geā bett'r," he slurs and between one breath and the next, he's out.
mactavish sighs, running his hand in a final pass over his head and stares at a face that looks so much younger in sleep; bruised and sallow skin hidden in the shadows. "i know you will."
he presses a slow kiss to his forehead, shutting his eyes against the grief that wells in his heart and gets up to pull a chair over to the bed; settling in for another long night's vigil of watching his broken lieutenant sleep, ready to tilt him over if he throws up, eyes locked on the slow rise and fall of his chest fearing tonight may finally be the time it stops.
#drug use#tw drugs#guess whos back on her 09 shit#its me bb!!!#anyway 09 ghost whoās just completely messy#if heās not on an op then heās at clubs drinking & taking anything he can get his hands on#mactavish knows what he gets up to and hates it#hates watching him destroy himself stumbling back to base with no memory of what - or who - heās done#hates seeing him prod at bruises knowing he has no idea where they came from#mactavish is more pissed that whoever riley was with just left him like that and that riley is totally fine with it happening#more than once he's found him almost od'ing half passed out in his room or the showers#and every time riley will slur out apologies and promises mactavish knows better to believe#riley knows how much it hurts mactavish to see him like this but its just so painful to live in his head#he canāt help but try and get out of it the only way he knows how#this is pre relationship btw just to make it all hurt a little more#ghost never remembers how he ends up back in his own bed after a bender#the whole point of them is to forget#heāll end up missing days at a time and never question what happened to him in the meantime#if he thinks hard enough sometimes he can pick up flashes of a familiar voice rasping in his ear and big hands moving his body#but itās hard for him to believe theyāre anymore than drug induced hallucinations of what he really wants#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#talk to me ghost#weāre a team. ghost team#09 soapghost#09 ghoap#soapghost#john soap mactavish#soap cod#simon ghost riley#ghost cod
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Hello! I just discovered your blog and I immediately became captivated by your webcomic, but I'm unsure where to read all of it. I know it's on Webtoons, but I can see it hasn't been updated for a while, and you still post about it.
Are your physical novels just prints of the webcomic? Are they a continuation? Is the story complete? Thanks in advance!
Hi there!
Glad you found me and are enjoying my comic!
It's only on webtoons, and the story is not complete yet! We're 2/3 of the way through right now. It's currently on hiatus, and it's scheduled to come back in about 2 months!
I'll explain why it's been so long if you're curious, but also for my followers who might also be wondering about it under the cut. Sorry, it's pretty much just me complaining haha
I took a month off I took 2 months to get the books printed I took a month to prepare my next comic and I took 2 months to write the rest of the series (I knew the character arcs I wanted, but not the time periods or mysteries!!!) I've been working on actual episodes since then
I had to take some time off because of some pretty extreme burnout due to the sheer amount of work it was to draw over 800 pages and write 6 complete stories in a year and a half... I was getting sick almost weekly due to the overwork, it was really really bad honestly. I was having to work 60+ hours every week just to keep up...
The nature of the comic itself is also difficult... Each of the arcs is a complete, self contained story which can be read (ideally) without context, and my arcs need to be about 10-13 episodes each... And since I have an exact number of episodes to work with, it's even harder.
It takes a ton of planning and a ton of refinement, and working week to week with no breaks I was forced to put out second or even first drafts, so I just wasn't happy with the work I was doing... And to do that for the rest of the series? I wouldn't be proud of the work I did.
Plus... To be entirely honest, webtoon has treated me quite badly IN MY OPINION... They deprioritized me before I launched (I had to beg for more promotion, I'm not exaggerating), they outright denied me the opportunity to even ask for a raise, I don't make any money on fast pass and they pay me less than my partner makes working at trader joes. My first editor left me completely hanging, my second editor (who I loved) was fired... And they told me I wouldn't get a third season before my first season even finished. So it was just repeatedly completely demoralizing.
I'm sorry it has taken so long, it'll have been 10 months by the time I come back. But I realized... I won't get promotion either way. I won't get more episodes either way. I won't get more money either way. So to finish everything, to make it feel good, to make it something I'm proud of, I chose to take longer to make it better.
I am fully aware I will lose a significant amount of my readership for this and it might genuinely affect my career moving forward. But it's what I had to do! So I'm sticking to my guns on it, and I'm confident long term it'll be worth it. It never could have been this good if I didn't take this much time.
#asks#steakandpeanutbuttersandwiches#I'm SO sorry youre new and you asked me such a benign question and I responded with... this... LMAO#I swear to god I tried to make it as short as possible#theres just a lot auauuaghkhgjk#basically. way too much work. not enough money.#so it either is gonna be good and take longer or be worse but come back faster#and I chose to take longer#so.#I'm really sorry and I wish that this decision didn't also come with the... pretty much guarantee that it will negatively impact my career.#I will lose readers. I will lose potential readers for my future work. it looks bad on me as a creator to take such a big break. etc. etc.#but it's good. it's so good. you have to trust me it's like the best stuff Ive ever written#it. ok well to be honest#it'll probably feel extremely simple and extremely natural#but it's been SO much work LMAO#I am not exaggerating I have written over 200 pages of scapped ideas to get to where it is#I'm sure it won't make sense why it took so long while reading but you gotta trust me LMAO#ideally it doesnt even 'feel' different right. cause its gotta be cohesive with the whole thing#but there is SO MUCH TO WRAP UP#THERES SO MUCH#and to make that feel natural in this little space oh my GOD it is so hard#ok omfg I'm doing it again I'm going on way too long again IM SO SORRY#YOURE NEW HERE AND IM DOING THIS IMMEDIATELy#this is like 90% for my followers who I know are curious about this and I'm just using you as a jumping off point to talk about it#cause I don't really like to make standalone posts very often#I likely will make some kind of official announcement about it when the date is extremely set in stone#right now I think it's still only tentatively scheduled so it could still change#and I'll say something more... refined and restrained... then.#but for now this is like. actually everything. I think#I'm sure I forgot something but whatever lmfao
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āWhyās he call you Darlinā?ā
on my knees begging my brain to stop trying to associate this song with Sam
#(itās too late guys iāve already added it to a couple playlists. i canāt help it)#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redacted sam#redacted darlin#rp audio stuff#Sevenās Blorbo Songs#music stuff#i fell down a rabbit hole of music videos on YT last night and decided to give this song a chance based on the title obviously#skipped through all the exposition just to quickly find out if i liked the song or not#and as soon as the first line came in i went head-in-hands at my desk bc i just Knew it was over for me#i hate that i like it#itās very repetitive and giving strong Modern/Mainstream Pop-Rap-Country vibes#but iām not too proud to admit that i eat that shit up on occasion#āYouāve been beatinā āround the bush so much youāre knockinā off the leaves.ā goes kinda hard tho iām ngl#āole boy in a Ridgeline and i drive a Chevyā would Sam be a truck elitist? hmm#i doubt it. i see him as too practical-minded to care about brand names and shit like that#like irl i think itās very silly. and perhaps a little questionable to hate on a āforeignā vehicle. but i donāt even like trucks at all so#insecure country boys and their obsession with big trucks are ruining the road for us regular people that just want a normal ass car#but iāll stop before i go off on a rant about americaās transportation problems#anyways. i can separate reality from fiction and i love the image of Sam in a beat up beloved old truck. clichĆ© as it may be#getting back on track. my POINT was that the song doesnāt even necessarily fit Samās vibes i just. canāt undo the association#been trying to think of a way for it to fit him but that would require Darlinā to be cheating on him and i donāt like that thought#like i love some types of angst but cheating isnāt one of them#i could view it through the context of being directed at Alexis bc i already hate her lmao but once again it doesnāt fit in canon#and i donāt know how i feel about the thought that he used to call her Darlinā too. though itās very possible. mmm angst#not that it has to fit with canon for me to attach a song to a character. certainly not! but i need to make it work in my mind Somehow#and i canāt even come up with a good HC to make this fit. the idea of Jealous!Sam is fun in theory but idk if iād like it practice anyways#tldr: does this really fit canon Sam? meh. Is it forever tied to him in my mind anyways due to the use of the petname Darlinā? absolutely.#anywho. one of these days iāll open this app to do something other than vent post or yap abt rp audio blorbos. but that day is not today!
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You said that if you dated Peter or Wade it would make you miserable. Whichā Okay fair, Wade does have a history of purposely hurting the people he loves.
But what about Peter? Why do you think dating him would make you miserable?
because Iāll always know I had the option to climb a 6ā8 cyborg and I passed that up for a sweaty little twunk that I perpetually have to remind to bathe (sorry peter)
#I donāt know. I donāt think peter is good boyfriend material. I think his insecurities would get exhausting.#Wade has bottomless patience. meā¦ I donāt know. I donāt think I could. Iāve got my own stuff going on. I donāt want a Project.#peter is definitely a project. and he needs someone with shed loads of patience and perseverance.#me I just. I wanna have a good time. so. come to me my big beautiful time traveller. whisk me away.#take me to the beach. you can disappear after I donāt mind Iām not needy. just spend a beautiful romantic week with me.#sci speaks#I donāt really know what kind of person Iām compatible with really actually.#all my relationships have been. pretty short.#and I donāt think itās any fault of my own really. and I donāt feel any loss over them at all. like at all. I wish I did. but I donāt.#a sci has so very thankfully never felt heartbreak.#but it makes me kind of question what kind of person I am when it comes to this sort of thing.#because I really donāt know.#I donāt know if I want commitment. I donāt even know if I want sex these days.#I ā¦ weirdlyā¦ am so devoid of yearning these days. like I feel content right now on my own. I donāt even feel lonely.#I used to yearn but I think Iāve moved past it. and I kind of just want to have a good time.#and that doesnāt even . involve a relationship or anything anymore. like I donāt think I want one actually. it feels like Iām Over it.#itās kind of great because Iāve never felt so calm in a long time. all because I decided that I donāt. actually Need anything.#I donāt need anything more than what I have. and thatās brought me rest after So Long being restless.#but if a massive time traveller came and whisked me away on sexy adventures how could I say no
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from this thing on twt
#vargas#edgar vargas#vargas zarla#zarla s#sunny's art#jthm#shitpost#johnny c#didn't like this one that much so i didn't even post it on twt lolz#i was like " hmmm who should be the big-eyed one#at first i thought nny would be the one asking but i recently read this sidefic where edgar is trying to make things#less awkward by filling the silence with questions#so i was like lol imagine edgar just asking nervously#brusk also told me the same thing and mmmyes#i wanted to wait to do another sketchdump so i could post this one but i didn't want to wait till the trend was ove#also it's not like have anything else to post . i just have some stupid crossover i did of vargas and code lyoko#really poorly made sketches too so i don't think i'll post them they're also in spanish#the only one in english is this one of jeremie taking edgar to the factory#and edgar's like ā a supercomputer ? while jeremie's thinking something like ā i need to launch a return to the past#why would edgar even know about the supercomputer in the first place though#idk all of those doodles were so pointless but fun to do#i have those and some drawings of edgar bleeding to death but i'm NOT posting those#lol i drew nny's boots he looks so silly#i'm currently working on the askblog ( just setting answers together so i can work on them later#idk if i'm happy or if this is just a manic episode but I FEEL GREAT bye#won't schedule this one like the others bc this is just a silly thing
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Hey wait hang on a second
So when Optimus got kicked out of the Autobot Academy 1000 years ago in TFA, he got reassigned I assume right after to the space bridge repair crew, and from what I recall, Bulkhead and Bumblebee were already there, with Optimus and then Prowl being the last additions to the team
So in the grand scheme of things, the Archa Seven (itās apparently not Arachna like I thought it was) incident wasnāt really that long ago. Like I was personally under the impression that this happened a long time ago and that 1000 years was our best estimate at how old Optimus was. But it really wasnāt that long ago, and also means itās closer to being Bulkhead and Bumblebeeās standard of age, considering theyāre the youngest and this was after their reassignment. I donāt know if that all made sense there, but what I mean is that 1000 years probably wasnāt that much of Optimusā lifespan, heās probably at least 1 million or so if weāre being real. 1000 years is how long the space bridge crew has been working together, minus Prowl
But also, doesnāt this mean that at the time Sentinel was Sentinel Minor and Bumblebee and Bulkheadās drill sergeant, Optimus and Elita were still around? Like this means this was pre super-jerkification of Sentinel. Also does this mean Optimus and Elita were Minors at this time too? Were they drill sergeants for their own recruits? What rank did these three have when they went on the Archa Seven mission?
Iāve been under the impression that they were relative newbies when they did that, but looking at the timeline, they were probably relatively high ranking at the time. Though I mean I guess it better explains why Ultra Magnus let Optimus have the rank of Prime, because if he had done that while they were newbies, itād be kind of a dick move to Sentinel, who has to actually work up at least two ranks for that (the Wiki tells me thereās Major in between Minor and Prime)
If Iām incorrect in this observation of mine, then my bad, Iām very stupid. But if this is the case, it changes a lot of how I view the timeline of this story; I thought the Archa Seven incident was way further back in the timeline relatively speaking
#just an observation I had while thinking about TFA#I donāt remember why anymore#but I was and now this information is messing with me#so if Iām wrong please tell me#because I will be pretty embarrassed if Iām making a big deal out of nothing#but will accept that I just misremembered and my original interpretation is the correct one#transformers#transformers animated#optimus prime#sentinel prime#tfa sentinel prime#random stuff#questions
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"makotolookinass"
the intersection of nu: carnival and free! fans that are all here because of our favorite green haired hunks (himbos?) is so funny
but it kinda makes sense given that both nu: carnival and free! are both at their core about caring about the people closest to you and prevailing internal struggles
dang , anonn, you really cut thru all the glamours of distraction
in brief contrast, i feel like a simple creature. one who was dragged into the intersection simply because i saw some dudes with Unlikely Physiques
#feesh answer#i mean... it started out that way for most of us huh?#then they heckimfk. GOT US#with the char development and lasting bonds an whatevr#it's abou t thte grioup dynamics and how they're all little freaks but they're little freaks who can rely on each other#and bring each other the Happiness#i say Unlikely Physiques because WHAT HIGHSHOOLCHOLERS HAVE BODIES LIKE THAT. WOSHOMST????#makes me think back to that thing i saw. which was probably a post on tumblr#where ppl had the same reaction and someone went ā actuallY! it's not out of the realm of possibility to have well-trained swimmers#at this age. lookin like this!! for example. look at xyz(figures and pictures of Likely Physiques under Conditions)#me squinting at makoto's back the entire time like.....i still find it difficult to believe.#i WANT to believe. but i find it difficult to do so. high schoolers the size of a car...#i think i got into a debate with a friend over Free! wives AHAHA#they were big on Rin and i was like girl i aint about that attitude . emotional constipation. i'm gonna hang out with Tall Mom#then they offered sousuke as a counter#and i repeated myself like GIRL I JUST SAID I WAS NOT ABOUT THAT EMOTIONAL DISTRESS. I AM GOING WITH THE (EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE) TALL MOM#and they went on about how makoto was insufferably boring compared to rin and sousuke#and i shrugged because we EVIDENTLY are looking for different traits in our wives. what? emotional stability is boring now??!?!#tho... makoto emotional stability is questionable. i didn't follow the series after the 1st season so i prob missed out on a lot#the mans got a yandere streak and probably other issues. but i didn't get as deep into free! as i did with nuca#so...lemme just enjoy my green swimming wife at a superficial level... ok [rin and sousuke] friend?#we shook hands in camaraderie at the end. we may wife Different Tropes but the world needs All Types#idk i guess the tropes wormed their way into my brain#i saw those droopy anime eyes with the smile and the green theme and concluded 'i am safe here'#stupid cartoon patterns crafting schema all up in my psychology
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