#these bitches are gay!!

[chirpsythismorning]

S3 is underrated bc it comes off so meaningless the entire time, when in reality it’s the opposite. The jokes in particular were top notch and it’s because most of them went over everyone’s heads. Like, do people even know that they hinted at Robin being lesbian right at the start of s3???

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[sharlinefreire]

canon mlm rep be like "i like a boy..but im!?!? also a boy!? >-<??" meanwhile queerbaiting "if you die i'm alone".

[sweatynutqueen]

LIKE AND REBLOG IF YOU LOVE STRAP ON

[swiftsharkness]

me during wandavision: wow they really just tease us with having agnes flirt with wanda and for what reason??

me during agatha all along: oh she’s just gay, that’s the reason

[froglover7789]

finally watching house md in order instead of whatever random episodes my friends force me to watch and. wow. the mouse bites meme is. so accurate? why is wilson just Always There. "I too am in this episode!" YES DIVA WE KNOW WHY DO YOU KEEP SHOWING UP DONT YOU HAVE THINGS TO DO????

[jay-wasstuff]

Bitches be like "this is my comfort character" and it's Logan the Worst Wolverine who hasn't had a day of happiness until Wade came in and gave him purpose, family and a new home.

[socvincjpeg]

No bc if i fumbled ford as badly as bill did i'd be on the news

Edit for clarity: The text says ‘I Grow Maddened’!!

(No bg+ close-up— click for better quality)

[harrowedsoup]

I refuse to change my headcanon that most of the other people at Canaan House probably thought Gideon was Harrow’s pretty boy toy until she showed them she could actually fight because she acted exactly nothing like a real Cav in anyway. A teenage ruler shows up with a hot butch that clearly isn’t trained to be a ninth Cav or even a normal-ish one? Come on. They probably thought griddlehark were over compensating trying to hide by staying away from each other. ��

[lovegrahams]

“i decided when i heard his voice” was actually one of the most insane things will graham has ever said imo and the implications are actually devastating to my mental state. he called hannibal, and the very second he heard his voice he decided that that was enough for him to not go through with his betrayal. just a simple “hello” made up his mind. a simple “hello” told him he didn’t have the heart to hurt him anymore.

[fiasco95]

Barty, barging into the Gryffindor common room: What’s up losers!

Sirius: Wh—

Barty: I actually don’t care, don’t answer that!

Remus: That—

Barty: Anywhoo! Am just here to collect my bitches!

James: Hey—!

Barty, looking at Pandora & Dorcas: Respectfully.

Barty, turning to Regulus: Disrespectfully.

Marauders & Friends:

Barty: Alright, great talk! Let’s go bitches!

Pandora, Regulus & Dorcas kissing their respective partners and following Barty out of the common room.

Marlene: …What the fuck just happened?

Lily: No fucking clue.

[verysadlesbian]

Sky practically called Viktor a fruitcake and then faded away. That is queen behaviour.

[churroach]

Still figuring out how to paint feathers

[twitchylittlelamb]

okay let's go

1. Intimate stabbing

2. Outright obsession

I feel like I don't really have to prove this one, this is literally the whole show.

3. Confused pining

4. No one knows me like you do

"I've never known myself as well as I know myself when I'm with him"

"You wanted to be seen" "By you"

"He knew where to find me"

Again, literally the whole show.

5. Lifelong promises that always sound suspiciously like wedding vows

Case closed.

[rambrandt-the-painter]

I hired this alligator to guilt you into giving trans people money this june

[wishfulsketching]

AU zaundads feeling younger