#there was nothing inevitable about it.
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1,000 days of war in Ukraine captured in images
#russia is a terrorist state#war in ukraine#tw: war crimes#russia#ukraine#fuck everyone who voted for trump and is cronies#absolutely unbelievable#for every single one of those 1000 days#there was nothing inevitable about it.#putin had 1000 occassions to choose to stop and withdraw.#1000 time he has chosen to continue#and the majority of us americans are helping him
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sad: falling out of a hyperfixation
tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it
#oughhhhhhh#this is about the dca fandom but also about every other strong fixation ive had over the years lol#i know it's normal and inevitable esp for less popular works or minor characters with little canon content#and there's nothing wrong with smaller communities of course those rock#but there’s just something special about getting into something at the same time as a lot of other people all at once#and existing in this chaotic fandom space that's just bursting with creativity and passion#i've been in fandom spaces for as long as some of you have been alive and i've only come across that sort of unbridled joy like#a handful of times at best#it's just a heartbreaking feeling to see real lightning in a jar fandoms like that wither away as people drift away#(understandably so!)#anyway don't mind me i'm just having thoughts#musing about fandoms past as well#that i too eventually moved on from but remember fondly even if im not active in anymore#also my music just aint hitting right so im just sitting in silence which makes me more Contemplative(tm)
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the fact that irving canonically survives through the end of asunder to be at wynne's funeral is so fucking funny to me. nothing but love and respect for MY unstoppable cockroach morally grey machiavellian mage dad!!! he's survived in his position through multiple attempted rites of annulment and blood mage plots popping up left right and center around him. the chantry keeps trying to stamp him out but his dodge game is simply out of this world, divine. civil wars, political machinations and minefields, chantry atrocities, this wily old motherfucker is dodging and weaving his way through it all, not-quite-no-hits-taken-running-it-but-honestly-close-enough-under-the-circumstances style. if solas does succeed in tearing down the veil I would fully believe that one of the like three people still alive at the end of it all would be a very weary 90 year old first enchanter irving going 'oh this shit again huh'. the maker has cursed him for his hubris and his paperwork is never finished (affectionate, it's fine he canonically loves paperwork)
#we should have had the option to leave him in the fade instead of hawke or a warden#he would've just annoyedly shuffled his way back out of there a week later#dragon age#dragon age origins#first enchanter irving#he must be SO annoying to the chantry because it's heavily implied he's made his playground#out of tirelessly finding technicalities and loopholes to exploit that they can't *quite* call him on without domino effects going off#I think first enchanter in the circle system at origins times is a position that invariably and inevitably leaves you morally compromised#but I feel he really does his best within the rules he's given to play with and personally i love him a bit for that. and also#for being an unkillable lil shit. insufferable. inconquerable in his 'I'm about to be such an annoyance to you' impish spirit.#the I'm going to suffer but guess what. so are you of it all. traumatize the chantry back#I just imagine sophia sending letters home right before the vote for independence like '...dad I am hearing some INSANE rumours out here#what the actual fuck is going on back home???'#and he's like 'nothing that you need to worry about sweetie just keep living your best life and have fun killing darkspawn <3'#(there's something that makes me feel So much about how consistently his stance is like... 'you'll always be welcome here#but the circle doesn't *need* you; go be a warden and live your life'. he managed to fineagle freedom for you somehow and won't let you#turn and glance back. not even once. I feel somehow both so abandoned and so incredibly loved it's wild)#oc: sophia amell
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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"Can you see us in every timeline?" you ask.
Barbatos smiles down at you, meeting your bright and curious gaze. Your head is in his lap, both of you stretched out on a soft blanket in the castle garden. Barbatos is leaning back against a tree, a cup of tea held in his gloved hands. The sky drips with stars.
"I see many possibilities," he says, his voice eternally gentle, forever content to answer your endless questions.
You reach up and brush your fingers through his strand of bright hair. "It's just that I wouldn't be the same person without you," you say. "And the thought of there being other mes in other timelines that aren't with you… well, it makes me sad."
You blush a little at this admission because it sounds silly when you say it out loud.
Barbatos chuckles softly, but he puts down his teacup. He takes your hand, even as your fingers are still entangled in his hair. He puts his other hand against your cheek.
"We may not find each other in every timeline," he says. "But I have found that the echoes of each timeline ripple through the others. You are inevitably linked to every other you."
"But they won't feel what I feel," you say.
"They will have impressions of your feelings," Barbatos says. "Have you ever had an inexplicable feeling of hope or despair wash over you? That is a reverberation from yourself in another timeline."
You consider what he's saying. That somehow, you in your present time and space can impact the lives of other yous, if even briefly.
"What do you think they feel from me?" you ask.
"I cannot predict it," Barbatos says. He smiles and the way it lights up his face is so entrancing, you lose yourself in it. "I can only hope they receive soft moments where they feel my love, every time I see you, every time I touch you, every time I kiss you."
Your fingers squeeze around the hand that's holding yours and you lift yourself up to kiss him. His arm moves behind your back to lend you support as he returns the kiss - soft and sweet and with the lingering taste of hellfire rose tea. In another timeline, an unexpected warmth floods through you.
masterlist | Thank you for reading!
#nothing just me daydreaming about having my head in Barb's lap#and inevitably talking to him about timelines#I kinda wanna write a Barb soulmate au#I think it'd be interesting#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me barbatos#obey me barbatos x reader#obey me barbatos x mc#om barbatos#om barbatos x reader#om barbatos x mc#obey me x reader#x reader#misc writes
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“What happened to the young boy who came into my chambers just a few years ago?”
Well, I mean, everyone he’s ever loved is either dead or about to die, so I’d wager on that. I mean, I could be wrong, but.
#bbc merlin#merlin#merlin spoilers#honestly Merlin is so fucking traumatised#it’s such a fun show#but then you think about it#and you realise just how tragic the whole thing is#he did everything he could#but there was nothing that could change the inevitable#but he tried so hard to defy fate anyway#even knowing the outcome#great now I’m sad
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okay, but, like, THAT'S how you do a villain story. in the FIRST scene, you watch him shoot a man in cold blood. the show tells you right away "this man is not a good man".
but then it gets you to sympathize - look at how much the world has stepped on him. look at how terrible the whole of gotham is. and even when he kills more people, does more terrible things, you still root for him. because it's fun to watch someone be terrible to terrible people. you root for sofia too, because if anyone deserves revenge its her, but you're rooting for both of them somehow.
and then the show tells you "when he was a boy he killed his brothers". but even still, you want to see what he'll do. the show is called the penguin, you want to see the penguin rise. when he lets his mother's finger almost get cut off, you pity him. he's a sad, broken thing. how could he be anything but bad? but he loves, so there must be something else there.
but then. but THEN
the show always told you: "this is the devil". but you thought, maybe the devil can make hell a little more bearable for some people. the devil is so often nuanced, sympathetic, complex. maybe he's like that.
you're wrong. there's nothing good within him and YOU rooted for him to succeed. you wanted to watch the destruction. and now you have to live with the consequences of thinking, even for a second, that he could be redeemed.
#lauren feels things#penguin spoilers#the penguin#the penguin spoilers#network execs are always talking about how they want something#'surprising but inevitable'#which is NOTHING that's a nothing phrase#eXCEPT THIS WAS EXACTLY THAT#don't even get me started on everything else#the performances the COSTUMES!!!#the story they told with sofia's costumes!!!!!!!!!!!!!#but god#the thing that got me so good#was seeing the scratches on oz's hands as he strangled vic#just like carmine and sofia's mom#i hope sofia murders oz so bad#oh and DEF don't get me started on the POWER DYNAMICS#the conversation the show was having about power#and being a woman and being a man and being rich and being poor and being white and being disabled#and how the systems of power and oppression are not at all neat#oz is a white man born poor with a disability#but he ultimately has more privilege than sofia#sofia was born on third base and inherited her kingdom but is still a woman they called crazy#who went down for a man's crime#oz is STILL right when he calls her out for her relative privilege#they both have more power over the other depending on circumstance#and then VIC#poor non-white disabled#he gets crushed under everyone#and yet has the power of LABOR ORGANIZING!!!!!!!!!!!!
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so I finished side order recently
#splatoon#pearl houzuki#agent 8#marina ida#acht mizuta#my stuff#inktober piece 2 :)#shoutout to my brother who reminded me i could replay the credits whenever because i had to get some extra refs for eight's model#and saved me from having to slog up the tower again#now if only splatoon could do that for every cutscene eh. please#i want to relive a lot of cutscenes and youre killing me for it splatoon#anyway did you know splatoon's official art has. well it wildly varies from piece to piece#they all follow like a very loose guidelines but also they all split off into their own things half the time#me with seven tabs of art trying to figure out if i want to do lines to separate pearl's fingers: so this one has lines but this one doesnt#'this one isnt relevant to this issue all fingers are splayed'#so in the end i just did whatever i wanted. i think that's a core tenet of art. do whatever you want. forever#also spent an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out what was etched into marina's headphones#im 98% sure it is the off the hook logo. but nothing save from booting up splatoon and checking myself would say for sure#and i didnt wanna boot up splatoon cause if i did then id inevitably be down a couple hours because 'oh well im here already. one run maybe'#but regardless!! im proud of how this came out even if i was supposed to have finished two days ago to keep with my schedule#especially the bg :) i think i did really good on that.#and eight's little smile i think thats the charm point of the whole piece and it took me about ten drafts to get it properly#i think i did good on that too.#im so enamored with splatoon rn help
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<✨🐏🌙>
#sonic fanart#sth#ariem#sonic dream team#aries the rem wishes bad dreams and nightmare teams to all android users#i always dread drawing characters i know Nothing about but this was inevitable#big fan of the liquid trans swirls in the stage bgs#gender the fluid
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One of my biggest pet peeves is the assumption that something has to be sad for it to be tragic.
I've always been a big believer of the 'Apollo has an awful love life'/'Apollo is plain unlucky with love' line of thinking but it does bother me that the general reasoning for that statement is given to the concept of 'Apollo is somehow undesireable and thus rejected' (Cassandra/Daphne/Marpessa) or 'his lovers die young and thus their love is unfulfilled' (Cyparissus/Hyacinthus/Coronis). I personally think that's a very unfortunate way of looking at things - not only because it neglects the many perfectly cordial entanglements and affairs Apollo has had, both mortal and divine - but because it presents a very shallow interpretation of the concepts of love and loss and how loss affects people.
Apollo can still grieve lovers that have a long, healthy life. The inherent tragedy of an immortal who knows his lovers and children will die and cannot stop it does not stop being tragic simply because those lovers and children live long, fulfilled lives. The inherent tragedy of loss does not stop being tragic simply because someone knows better than to mourn something that was always going to end.
What is tragic is not that Apollo loves and loses but that loss itself follows him. Apollo does not love with the distance of an immortal, he does not have affairs and then leaves never to listen to their prayers again. He does not have offspring and then abandon them to their trials only to appear when it is time to lead them to their destinies. He raises his young, he protects the mothers of his children, he blesses the households that have his favour and multiplies their flocks that they may never go hungry. He educates his sons, he adorns his daughters and even in wrath he is quick to come to his senses and regret the punishments he doles out.
Apollo loves. And like mortals, there will always be some part of him that wishes to protect the objects of his affections. Apollo, however, is also an emissary of Fate. He knows that the fate of all mortal things is death. He knows that to love a mortal is to accept that eventually he will have to bury them. There is no illusion of forever, there is no fantasy where he fights against the nature of living things and shields his beloveds from death. Apollo loves and because of that love, he also accepts.
And that, while beautiful, is also tragic.
#ginger rambles#ginger chats about greek myths#greek mythology#apollo#Listen man#I think there's something extremely beautiful about Apollo's affairs#Yes I know that Ares also loves and cares for his daughters but this isn't about him#There's just something about the way that Apollo put his all into it every single time#To the point that even when he does know better he still fights because of the strength of his love#The Iliad to me will always be a love story#Yes Achilles' wrath is said to come from his overwhelming feelings towards Patroclus#but what Achilles does has nothing to do with grief or love#By the end of everything Achilles forsook that love which ought to have defined his actions based on what he was saying#and warped it into a weapon meant to satisfy the void left by his loss#Apollo though - I am always taken aback by the sheer weight of his love#towards not only Hektor but towards all of Troy in the Iliad#And how he is very careful to balance that love and all the ways he wishes he could fight against their inevitably end#with his duties as one who is both aware of the impending end and whose position in the war#has put him in opposition with his elders#That delicate balance between a love so powerful that he is willing to take on the full weight of Athena and Hera's wrath#and an understanding that the battle he fights is not for victory but simply because for love's sake#How could you not think of that as beautiful and awesome and so achingly tragic#I feel the same about both Asclepius' and Actaeon's deaths#Apollo loved BOTH of his sons - Asclepius and Aristaeus - so so SO much#He was so incredibly proud of them both and delighted immensely in the both of their victories and talents#And so when Asclepius dies and it is by his own father's hand - I have always found his act of wrath so fascinating#Honestly this could be its own separate post - but the fact that Apollo does not beg Zeus to reconsider or to bring Asclepius back#when Apollo has made cases for lenience on things like that before speaks of a level of understanding from Apollo that Asclepius was always#going to die because of his pushing of the boundary between life and death#so he doesn't bother trying to reason with Zeus or plea his grief - instead going directly to destroying something important to Zeus
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PARKOUR VILLAIN 🗣️‼️
#parkour civilization#parkour villain#clownpierce#clownpierce fanart#mcyt#!art#guys idk nothing about mr clownpierce but i'm definitely intrigued by him#the brain worms.... the brain worms are worming.......#the inevitable happened i am so sure of my fixation that i changed up my blog a bit... sorry not sorry!#i'll post more prkr civ soon btw. beware
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in like the second to last episode when taub was like why dont u respect wilsons wishes to die
house yells at him about how hard it has been to choose to live
and then we cut to other doctors and nurses and patients who hear him yelling this taboo thing, looking at him like hes weird and wrong and making a ruckus
ugh. houses reaction to it hurts me. its just such a clear reminder of how alone he feels/is.
#house md#gregory house#its just like. he doesnt understand that sometimes social nicities have a real function when it comes to building trust and relationships#but its a double edged sword bc he is right in that those nicities and the baggage along with them box out a lot od actual meaning#we see this theme many times of house valuing the patients life above all else#the question to him isnt the ends jsutifying the means#even though that is the problem we are tackling#its that if the ends dont justify the means then how can the ends mean anything#he tries to justify suffering jn this way#its why the question is most of the time not framed as dont you understand you are making people suffer#house is like yeah i suffer greatly all the time in every direction for no reason and i cant do anything about it#maybe suffering is inevitable but maybe it can mean something#the dr code Do No Harm is flawed because it is impossible to inflict nothing
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She para on my humans till I [GRUESOME SOUNDS OF BUG FUELED VIOLENCE]
Redraw of a skitter design I did a little over a year ago, comparison under the read more
And the sketch. As a little treat. Just for you.
#taylor Herbert#parahumans#parahumans worm#worm#my art#I’m sorry it’s so dark her hair being black and her suit also being black is so irritating to me#eyes changed to red to mimic a fly. face mask had a minor change to mimic the head of an ant better#antennae got a little extra prong to mimic ant pincers and also bc hollow knight fan#boots got a steel toe for maximum violence potential#suit padding was actually referenced off of motorcycle armor instead of just winging it#no skirt or belt because I don’t think the former looked good and I didn’t want to draw the latter#even if it’s not canonically accurate she needs some form of armor. Taylor your vital organs. they’re in danger.#iirc she DID put knee pads and stuff on when she first started out. and yet she refuses to wear a helmet. inevitable TBI moment.#in terms of general art stuff the posing looks so much better. look who learned about contrapposto.#and improved (a little) at anatomy. not really on costume design but we’re taking baby steps.#I’d like to thank the wormblr fans for recirculating the og post every three months or so for getting me out of my art block#nothing will make you draw faster than seeing your old art go around.#i promise I’ll finish worm one day 🫡#end of patch notes/ted talk/etc
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An observation:
Nahyuta has spent so many years unthinkingly and unquestioningly doing other people's bidding that he has become completely out of touch with his own wants and needs, straight up ignoring his feelings and overworking himself because he's used to it, and others don't realise his behaviour is a cry for help because he's so stoic and expressionless
When Athena was younger she had trouble identifying and expressing her emotions, so she was given Widget as a means to understand her feelings and convey them to those around her, allowing her to deal with her trauma in a healthier manner and get help from others when she needed it
Conclusion:
Nahyuta with a widget. please. it would be so freaking funny. please
#i've been thinking about this for so long i should probably just make the post already#ace attorney#aa6 spoilers#nahyuta sahdmadhi#athena cykes#random stuff#may or may not have been making up an entire khura'in sitcom in my head based on this premise#that i will inevitably do absolutely nothing with#maybe 2025 will be kinder to me than 2024 has been and i'll be able to like. exist again as a person
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scoundrel?? what scoundrel???? the magnificent mr cards (who ironically has more of a flower aesthetic going on) is completely unrelated to any "bandaged scoundrels" running around the neath. in fact it's never heard of the word scoundrel ever in its entire definitely long definitely ancient life. but yknow, hypothetically, if it did know the scoundrel, it's confident that they're really really really handsome and cool and epic and they're almost just as amazing as it is and you should totally donate all your valuables to them and stuff
aaand because i like them too much, have a transparent version. the Creachure. the Thing, even.
#the scoundrel's flower theme vs the 'canon' cards gambler theme. the latter lost this round im afraid#i do really like how they came out though#yin art#fallen london#sorry for posting cringe (my art) in the maintag it will probably inevitably happen again#while im here: design notes!#in my head their robe is like. Heavy. very thick velvet probably getting very dirty dragged around on the floor everywhere#the little drapes around their body are probably gold of some kind. the bangles and rings definitely are#the flowers here are almost certainly fake compared to their usual ones.#do you know how much tax must happen on surface flowers going neathward.#the scoundrel probably spends half of their rent budget keeping their stupid aesthetic alive#their glasses stand out like their eyes while wearing the robe mostly due to cartoon logic#they probably mostly have their normal look on underneath. aka still have their bandages#the ones on their hands are fraying bc bat claws grow sharp and grow large. they're a bit fraught over it.#they dont like looking at any part of themself including the hands#it DOES help their mastersona seem authentic though. so that's a hashtag bonus#they mainly trade in luck and debts. and hijinks. they dont officially trade in hijinks but they definitely sure do get up to it#word is probably already starting to spread about how much mr cards hates boats.#surely this has nothing to do with the scoundrel's famed dislike of the exact same thing.#surely.#scoundrelventures
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Thinking about the symbolic weight of smoking in the TLT universe that comes to the fore in The Unwanted Guest -- the way it moves through from person to person: Pyrrha smoked, and Augustine wanted to impress her in all her stone cold fox MILF James Bond glory (and tbf who wouldn't) so he started too. and even though as far as he knows she's been gone for a myriad and is never coming back, he keeps the habit. Ianthe sees something in the hollowed-out Faberge eggshell of Augustine that resonates with her, all that gilded eloquent emptiness and disdain through the ages, so she picked it up from him to try to emulate it. She picked it up so hard that Palamedes -- the exact spiritual antithesis of the 'smoking! on a space station! what a powermove' ennui Ianthe so admired -- spontaneously unnerded enough to even known how to, simply from a sort of contact contamination of the soul.
G1deon and Augustine sharing a jittery smoke after their near-Harrow experience during soup night, and it's the closest thing to any real sense of brotherhood that remains between them. Pyrrha going ten thousand years dying both literally and for a smoke (and then Camilla sold her fucking cigarettes (for a third of what they were worth, probably Pyrrha's own good, and also more importantly grocery money). what an entirely haunted time to be alive etc.). Augustine and Mercy trading a cigarette back and forth in the middle of their collusion over the love and murder of god.
An act of small and measured self-destruction in the name of something a little bit like connection when you're stuck somewhere in yourself where love itself dares not or cannot tread (ritualized, transmissible)..........
#the unwanted guest#the unwanted guest spoilers#the locked tomb#ianthe tridentarius#augustine the first#pyrrha dve#palamedes sextus#this series is going to make me lose my mind completely one day (affectionate)#the locked tomb meta#the fact that ianthe seems to have had some genuine admiration for augustine makes my head spin. of course though.#of course she sees the person who looks the most like he's successfully made himself impervious to the world#utterly untouchable and impossible to hurt because he isn't even really there#and she believes it! even after seeing the john mercy augustine mess at the end! because it's such a seductive idea#when you've stuck yourself in an inevitable ocean of pain to think you could make yourself numb enough that it doesn't matter#it's the emotional equivalent of 'oh there's water all around? well I just won't breathe in then. easy lmao get on my level'#she holds on to that thing from him even when it's been proved to be both impossible and ultimately untrue even in him#because uh. oh I'm about to be kind of sad for ianthe what the fuck is going on. he might actually have been the closest thing#to parental and especially paternal affection she's ever known. certainly known enough to try to model herself after#IMAGINE how fucked up the nine houses must be when augustine the first registers for anyone as a model of psychological survival#ianthe do you really want to be yourself completely so much that you're willing to be nothing. I mean yeah probably but. oh my god#gaining nothing at the cost of everything
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