#then i get sad when I miss things that happen

[euthymiya]

You believe in soulmates. Alhaitham does not. It’s not as though he loves you any less for his beliefs, but he certainly doesn’t entertain your baseless theories.

You’re determined to change his mind.

“What would you do if we never met?” You ask, staring up at him with your cheek pressed against his chest.

He glances down at you, sighing as he shakes his head. Here we go, he thinks silently. “I probably wouldn’t do anything, considering I wouldn’t know you existed.”

“You wouldn’t be sad?” You frown.

“How can I be sad about something that I don’t know exists?”

“Well, you could know of me,” you insist, “just because you don’t know me doesn’t mean you don’t know I exist.”

“In that case, I probably would not do anything,” he snorts. You don’t like that answer, glaring up at him as he adds, “I wouldn’t know what I’m missing if we never met.”

“You’re a real romantic, has anyone ever told you that?” You grumble. There’s a vibration of his chuckle through his chest, right under your cheek in a soft, rhythmic feeling that you’re so used to, you think it might be familiar from another life.

Over the course of the Akademiya’s years, there have been two prominent theories that have been debunked about soulmates:

1. The law of conservation of mass-energy states that matter and energy cannot be created or destroyed—but only transformed. When a person dies, their body decomposes, breaking down into atoms that return to the earth, air, and water. These atoms then get recycled by nature, eventually becoming part of other living organisms, thus reincarnating from their previous life forms. It is possible, then, that two individuals could fundamentally be linked to reincarnate together from the same set of atoms in every lifetime.

It was later debunked by a scholar named Lamiya. Atoms themselves don’t retain information about where they’ve been or what they’ve been part of. They are interchangeable at a fundamental level, which means there is no difference between an atom in a human and a rock.

2. The heart and brain generate electromagnetic fields that extend outward from the body, with the heart’s field reaching several feet. Studies suggest these fields may be sensed by others nearby, subtly shaping feelings of comfort, attraction, and connection. It is possible that certain individuals’ frequencies may naturally align, creating a sense of harmony between electromagnetic fields, thus indicating that two individuals are naturally connected and could be labeled soulmates.

This theory was later disproven by a scholar named Dharmakirti. While human bodies do generate electromagnetic fields, there is no evidence that these fields influence interpersonal attractions or emotional resonance. Fields produced by the heart and brain are exceptionally weak and rapidly diminish with distance, making it unlikely they could be sensed or create harmony between individuals in measurable ways.

They fascinate you enough that Alhaitham pulls strings to allow you access to the archived files, but it doesn’t go unnoticed by you how he scrunches his nose in distaste as he sifts through them himself.

Soulmates have no plausible evidence of existing, he argues.

Lots of things have no plausible evidence, yet they exist, you always argue back.

You like to think despite all the differences, you and Alhaitham are soulmates—that some form of you, outside of your physical bodies, exists for each other and each other alone.

You think it must be the case when your eyes seem to find his in a crowd without even trying. What are the odds that in a sea of people, they always happen to come across his by chance? And what other explanation would there be for the way he always seems to just know you’re staring at him while he sleeps every morning, waking up not too long after your eyes fall on his face in admiration? And how else would you rationalize the fact that you could tell his presence apart from anyone. You’re certain that if two bodies were standing behind you from a distance, your heart would know which one belonged to him.

Soulmates, you argue. That has to be the answer.

“I think we were always meant to meet,” you murmur quietly, tracing a finger along the pale skin of his chest. “Don’t you?”

“We’ve shared numerous classes together and have offices within within the same hall,” he states blandly, “I think the chances of not meeting would be rather improbable.”

“Or maybe,” you huff, “we were always meant to meet because we’re soulmates.”

“I think that theory has been sufficiently disproven—”

“You never know! We believe in the divine even if we’ve never seen them, haven’t we? Who’s to say Celestia aren’t fake—”

“The Archons have spoken of them multiple times, and The Gods, in fact, do exist for us to see, so I think we can trust—”

“Maybe Celestia decide soulmates,” you reason, raising a pointed brow at him, “how will you disprove that? There’s no evidence that they haven’t, and you can’t collect much evidence about them, so I think it’s safe to say that it’s possible.”

“But then it’s equally as safe to say it’s not possible by that logic, as well,” he says smugly.

“Fine,” you huff, glowering up at him through puffed cheeks, “I guess you’re just too stubborn to convince.”

“I’m not stubborn,” he argues (which he does quite stubbornly, you want to say), “I apply logic and reasoning to my theories. Which is why they are hardly disproven.”

“Do you at least think we’d be soulmates in another world if they did exist?” You ask hopefully.

He looks like he wants to argue about the likelihood of another world existing altogether—it irritates you enough that it pulls a frown on your face before you grumble a quiet forget it, shuffling out of his arms and turning away to face your back at him.

He chuckles, shaking his head. Something fond blooms in his chest, like a fresh padisarah in May.

“If,” he emphasizes as his arms wrap around you from behind, pulling you flush against his chest once more, “if in another world we existed where soulmates were real, then yes. I do think it would be you and I.”

“Really?” You ask quietly.

“Yes,” he whispers. Suddenly, he sounds rather sure about a theory he never even believed in the first place.

“I wonder what we’re doing in that other world,” you hum thoughtfully.

He sighs, bringing the blanket back up to cover both of your bodies and mumbles, “I would hope we’d be sleeping at a reasonable hour before a work day.”

—————

Stay tuned for them being soulmates after all in another world *wink wink* ;)

[clos-posts]

Okay so, hear me out:

I've been on a bit of a Merlin fanfic hyperfocuse and came across another "I'm Emrys" where Merlin has to perform magic for Arthur to believe him, in front of the entire round table council, and I had a thought.

So, we all know that Merlin is magic itself, spells that seemed powerful to other sorcerers are not that powerful to Merlin and my hc is that these spells barely make his eyes turn gold, like maybe a flicker so fast the average person will miss it.

So I imagine Merlin saying he's Emrys and Arthur being all 'well then prove it' and Merlin makes a fireball (cliche I know but bear with me). Now Arthur has seen this spell and though he has a merger knowledge of magic, knows that it's quite a powerful spell and that most sorcerers eyes are practically a blinding gold, but Merlins eyes don't change. That and Merlin doesn't even speak and therefore didn't cast a spell.

Arthur, thinking that some other sorcerer helped Merlin with his self-sacrificing, kind-hearted, not wanting anyone to die personality, appear as if Merlin is this 'Emrys' and in a patience but patronizing tone tells Merlin that's is honorable to try and protect this Emrys, but his eyes didn't even change colour and therefore can not be a sorcerer.

Merlin, in a very Merlin way, huffs and proceeds to say something like 'Well duh, that was a very simple spell. Doesn't even require that much magic to perform' and the entire room goes silent.

(meanwhile Guise blood pressure has skyrocketed and is on the verge of either killing Merlin himself or having a heart attack. He hasn't decided yet.)

Arthur, absolutely baffled (and a little turn on at the casual display of apparently immense power), asks: 'What will make your eyes gold then? If you even are a sorcerer?'

Merlin, never one to back down from a challenge and already too deep into this, shrugs and says 'We would need to be outside'

And that's how the whole council ends up on the training grounds opposite Merlin waiting in anticipation as to what he will do.

There's silence so thick that no one dares break until Merlin starts to chant. At first nothing happens and Arthur is relieved (and a little disappointed), but then clouds start to gather, think dark clouds above them, and Merlin starts to get louder. Thunder claps across the sky and there electricity in the air making Arthur's hair stand on end and a shiver works its way down his spine. He looks at Merlin and though it's subtle at first, his eyes are glowing gold.

The tension builds and builds and with one final shout from Merlin, his eyes, a brilliant gold, as lightning falls all around him, clashing to the ground destroying the train field in its wake.

Arthur can do nothing but stare. Breath caught, heart hammer, and a sudden hot arousal catching him off guard. He can do nothing but stare at Merlin, his loyal manservant, standing amidst the lighting with his head thrown back and a look of contentment on his face, as if performing magic of this magnitude is comfortable, relaxing, an everyday occurrence.

When Merlins eyes meet Arthur's, there's a, small, sad smile on his lips, and then quicker then it had started the lightning stops and the clouds disappear, and the only thing that can be heard is the birds beginning to sing again.

Arthur can't think of anything to say and stupidly say 'you destroyed the training grounds'. Merlin at this point blushes, stammers out an apology before waving his hand with a few muttered words and the training field is in perfect condition once again.

Arthur and the entire council are baffled.

Then, before anyone could say anything, Arthur blurts out a command for Merlin to go to Arthur's chambers and he does. Without question. Just a shrug, and walks off. Arthur is wheeling. This powerful sorcerer, who just showed them a feat that no mortal man will ever replicate just listens to his command with nothing but a shrug!

Anyway, once Arthur has calmed the council somewhat he makes his way to his chambers. Once he enters Merlin is speaking so fast it's hard to keep up, something about coins, destiny and then shockingly how Arthur is the only person that can kill him if he uses Excalibur. What. The. Fuck.

Arthur: I'm not going to kill you Merlin!! Why would I kill you?!?

Merlin: Well, I mean, umm, I'm a sorcerer? Emery's? The strongest warlock to ever walk the Earth?

Arthur: I'm not going to kill you Merlin. However! If you do not take me to bed and absolutely ravish me in the next 10 minutes, I may have to resort to drastic measures!

Merlin, absolutely gobsmacked, face red: Wh- what measures..?

Arthur, absolutely confident, turned on beyond belief, practically gagging for it: I'll start begging.

And before he knows it Merlin pounces, and the rest is history.

That was not meant to be as long as it was... 😂

BUT!! If someone who writes fics could take this and write a fully fleshed version on this and then tag me in it I would be forever grateful. ADHD and dyslexia does not make a good writer for me unfortunately 🥲🥲🥲

OH! One last thing! I have a hc that cold iron had a natural negative field which repels energy which is why those that have learned magic have it cut off when chained in cold iron. They can't draw upon their magic from the energy around them. However, with Merlin being magic it's a little different for him.

So, I had this image of a knight, without prompting thinking he's doing what the king would want, walks up to Merlin at some point during his light show and slaps cold iron shackles on him. But, instead of the magic stopping, Merlins eyes grow brighter and bright, and the shackles start to shake and groan, because whilst cold iron does repel energy, it's a little hard to do that from both sides and can't take the pressure. At some point the shackles start to glow as the negative properties of the iron are being overwhelmed and forced into itself. Merlin looks down, looks back at the now terrified knight and says: You should probably duck. And no soon has the knight hit the ground the shackles explode, for lack of a better word. No harm done to Merlin tho.

[dilf-docs]

X Si Volvemos

ex older bf!logan x younger fem!reader

summary: there are many things you and logan disagree in; but not when it comes to things in bed.

warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (phew), smut, ex!logan, exes to ????, p in v, creampie, reader's in her early to middle twenties so her frontal lobe hasn't developed yet; don't expect any reasonable thinking on her side, logan is on his middle to late 40s, angst (duh), this happens in an AU where mutants don't exist bc i don't wanna complicate myself with timelines lol hence time isn't really important but it's contemporary, the vibes i bring to the function are more sad than horny and i'm sorry, toxic too! may build a series around it?

word count: 1,925 words

side note: the incredible @bpmiranda's got me with a very bad case of ex!logan fever :( plus after listening to karol G's album mañana será bonito and seeing i may or may not be obssesed with romeo santos, i got the song in the title on loop: as you can see, it's all very fitting ++ don't forget to check out her stories, they're so good istg!!!!

You shouldn't call.

"Logan" you speak. His name burns in the tip of your tongue, like a secret you're not supposed to tell.

He shouldn't answer.

It's quiet at first on the other line, until a rough voice says I'm here, appearing to be distant, but who is he trying to fool? As soon as he saw the number pop on the screen, his fingers moved with a learned urgency.

You shouldn't keep calling.

"I need you" three words to cover those you actually mean; hanging in the spaces between the silence.

I miss you. I love you.

Your hear a heavy sigh on the other end.

He shouldn't keep answering.

"Princess..." Logan pleads, "don't do this"

You know better than that, he wants to say, but keeps his mouth shut. Just to hear your voice, just to-

"Please, Lo" you whine out. Logan grabs his jeans with force, the fabric strained under his white-knuckled grip. It takes him a lot not to run to you right there and now.

"Don't" but his voice cracks as much as his resistance.

"I've got the house" you whisper the prayer; a routine so sacred none of you seem to break it, "just for us"

"Y/n" even saying your name is painful; like the most addicting and damaging drug to ever exist, "stop"

Logan loved your stubborn heart, but there are times where he wishes you weren't like this.

"I'm sorry" and then he hangs up.

I'm sorry for not being who you needed. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I keep on coming back after I said I would leave you alone. I'm sorry I can't keep my promises.

You feel it around your neck―bruises in the vocals your voice has failed to scream; it chokes you with rage.

"Are you stupid?" you ask yourself in the mirror.

What are you doing? Why are you doing this to yourself? Do you love him more than you love you?

You dial again, but this time, it's a girl who picks up.

"Yeah?"

"Hi. Wanna go out?"

Logan feels so out of place, but this used to be your favorite bar, and he's desperate for a drink.

Listening to your voice has always made him weak, but after you broke up, it drives him crazy.

He empties another glass, feeling pathetic. This is how bad it's gotten: you've got him scouring the places you used to go, chasing your ghost, trying to get a glimpse of your silhouette or a whiff of the phantom of your scent, the lavender haunting him; getting under his skin.

A song beggins playing, and it's the same vinyl set from two years ago. The night he met you: a pretty young thing so out of place in an old bar like that, playing hard to get, only to end the night moaning over him, fogging his car's windows, saying his name in a way no one else had before. He still remembers the way your legs trembled but he held you, beads of sweat confusing themselves with the glitter on your skin. Logan doesn't know what that is, but he's marveled, so in awe of you, everything of you: young, new, exciting.

But every new thing wears out, and the gap he swore wouldn't matter came crashing in years that built a distance between him and you.

So he did what he did best: ruin it. Deny the feelings bubbling inside; let them consume his reasoning, pushing you like he had done with everyone who cared about him before.

When he broke your heart, he took a part with him. So you keep coming back, looking for it; trying to piece yourself together. And he let's you: because God knows you have a part of himself too.

He's so drunk he probably imagines the hint of lavender in the whiskey tinted air. He's so desperate to see you again, he's seeing your face among the crowd. He's definitely gone insane: hearing that laugh he misses every day.

"Y/n..."

The music pauses: all you can hear is your name being said in that way like it belongs to him.

"...Logan"

He walks in autopilot over to the table you and a group of girls are sitting. They're all beautiful―beautiful people attract beautiful people, but he's only got eyes for you.

"What are you doing here?"

He raises a glass he didn't know he was carrying, "having a drink".

Your lips purse, and Logan doesn't know if it's because you're laughing at him or sad.

"I see" but you divert your gaze, looking at your shirt's neck. The outfit you chose: a black dress that pushes your tits on top. They are on display, and Logan feels played by you―his eyes trained on the strained fabric, tongue watering like it did when he would lick your sensitive nipples.

"I see too" he says in automatic, and one of your friends laughs. He looks away, thanking the low lights, or you'd see the red embarrassment on his face.

You stand up and walk over to him, and your friends sense it's time to leave the two of you alone.

"Why did you hang up?" you throw the question so casually; the nerve you have.

"What do you mean?" it's the only thing that comes to his mind. Very stupid, indeed.

You scoff, "delete my number, then"

"You keep on calling" he bites back.

"And you keep answering"

You never shut up. He hates that.

"I may have to stop"

You get closer, way too closer. So much, your hot breathe clouds his judgment.

"Try to" you dare.

And he tries, he really tries. But not today.

Not today when he takes you home, finally looking complete with you in it again. You had moved out after your last discussion, saying you'll never be back.

"You haven't changed a thing" you murmur in between kisses, and he can sense a bit of melodrama in his voice that makes him roll his eyes despite the dull ache on his chest.

He picks up your body swiftly, carrying you up to the bedroom.

"Why would I?" he asks, voice so low and small you almost miss it.

"Because you hate me" you avoid his eyes, even if your faces are too close, loosing all that corageous character of yours, "said you would get rid of it; of everything that reminded you of me"

But when he drops you softly on the matress, there's still that lamp you got him in the night table.

"I couldn't" he confesses.

I couldn't, he means, because I couldn't let you go.

But you both know it won't work out, something you knew right from the start: because toxic loves only fulfill basic needs. This isn't healthy, but he forgets it all as soon as you're moaning his name. Still, he promises himself he will say goodbye to you this time, even if it's inside of you.

"Shut up and kiss me, then" you're always pushing him around, making him do the things he desires to but doesn't want to do.

So he obliges, leaning in, the lavender so strong all over your sweet skin, poisoning his mouth on every kiss he leaves. He feels you squirm under him, goosebumps along your skin, prickling against his, so visible he can see and feel it even in the dim lit room.

"Take it" Logan doesn't look at you, but when he does, you feel him stare deep into your soul, "I know you want it"

He's sliding his dick inside you as soon as the sentence is over, the permission to take you and use you implicit. He robs a drawn-out groan out of you.

"So tight for me" he murmurs against your shoulder, sharp breaths and soft groans flooding your ears. His cock hits deep within you, hard thrust no one has ever been able to replicate, making you gasp for air, burying your face in the plush pillows now drenched in your sweat.

"You're so deep" you hiss, hot and overwhelmed, waves of pleasure hitting like water against cliffside rocks. "So big, Lo" you whine, dizzy at the way your pussy stretches for him.

"Just for you" he grunts out, and it's the truth. No matter how dark the room is or how many faces he avoids, he always looks into the eyes of the other women he fucks, his heart sinking when he can no longer pretend it's you, "fuck, squeeze a bit more".

Hearing his deep voice, rough when you fuck, always making you soak, coating his dick in your juices. You grip tight, as tight as the nails that hold onto his shoulders, making him moan at the pain.

"Like that, princess. Good girl" you moan at the praise, "I know you could take me, all of me"

He grunts and pants, holding you tighter as his cock pumps faster, in sync with your now closer to happening orgasm.

Before it, he slows down his thrusts, "where do you want me to cum, princess?"

He wants to, inside of you, but he can't do so, not when he promised he wouldn't ruin your life. But making you his, marking you as only his, makes his dick inside you twitch. Fuck, he's so balls deep inside you all he can think is filling you up silly.

"Inside me, Lo" like you read his thoughts, and it always amazes and scares him; how deep inside his mind you are. Never happened, not in his four decades of life. And that's part of the problem: he's closer to death than you are but it's only with you, young―blossoming with life, that he feels truly alive.

So how can he say no, when you plead and beg with those pretty doe eyes of yours? Who could imagine such a sweet thing to be so needy. He feels like you could ask for his heart, and he'd carved a whole in his body for you―bleeding out of love; dying with a smile.

"Such a greedy little thing, princess" he mocks, but his tone betrays him―dripping in adoration, "want me to fill you up all nice?"

A broken wail is what he takes as your answer, your mind in blank.

He finds himself letting go, way faster than he should; he just misses you and your needy dripping pussy that much. You can't hold back longer either, rush flowing through your veins, much more satisfying than the alcohol you had drank an hour ago.

Logan paints your insides with layers of his hot cum, mumbling a soft:

"Anything for my princess" he keeps going, panting as he's milked entirely dry, "anything you want, my girl"

Your vision is still spotty, mind fogged: you're sure that's the reason the hurt hasn't settled in your heart yet.

Then the silence comes, like it always does now.

"Y/n" you always love when he calls you by your name, but you hate the way he's saying it now. Like a goodbye.

"Don't-" you plead, begging he shuts up. But he pulls out, and says:

"It's for the best"

You don't want what's best. You want him.

"Can't believe you wore this dress" he traces the pattern of the tight clothes, damped in sweat, "you know it's my favorite. Why?"

You fail to supress a smile, even if it's tired and almost sad, "I knew you couldn't say no".

The truth is, you know many things: like how this is never going to stop until it's destroyed you both.

[akutasoda]

Hiii :)

Please can i request Boothill with a Reader who is insecure about their personality so they always act emotionless/stoic around others.

true personalities

synopsis - what happens when boothill meets someone who is insecure of their personality

includes - boothill

warnings - gn!reader, fluff, slight angst, wc - 479

a/n: hi hi ^^

↪at first, boothill thought you were just the type of person who wasn't expressive and preferred to keep to yourself. something he could understand, some folks could definitely get too much and sometimes solidarity was much cozier.

↪it definitely made you an easy person to be around. in boothill's opinion, he had spent many a day traveling on his own and so he found that certain eccentrics or more expressive people could be harder to be around on some days - not that it was a bad thing or anything.

↪it would only be until he was closer with you that he'd start noticing. he could note how occasionally your facade started cracking, how small bursts of personality or emotion in general seeped through. and that made him curious.

↪quite naturally, he started assuming that you were the kind of person who only showed proper emotion to those who you trusted - something boothill would've taken in honor. but something was clearly different. it wasn't as simple as that.

↪because if that was the case, then surely by now he would've seen more of your “true” side per say. that clearly wasn't the case. and boothill wasn't particularly one to pry, but there was something about you that made him want to, as if he knew it was because of a less “pleasant” reason.

↪whether or not he found out on his own or if you ended up telling him, he'd find out eventually. upon learning that your stoicism around pretty much everyone you knew was attributed down to an insecurity of your own personality, boothill felt two things.

↪one, confusion. how could somebody hate their own personality? now he was very far from being any kind of philosopher, but your personality was what made you, you. hating your own self seemed dumb to him.

↪two, empathy. now he couldn't exactly see it from your perspective so it wasn't really empathy but boothill couldn't even begin to fathom how you ended up hating your own personality, but it was a sad thought for him.

↪in a way, when boothill adapted his new life, that could be seen as some form of hatred towards his past self. going to the very lengths of destroying his body to have it rebuilt anew.

↪but now, boothill was determined to draw that side of you back out. subtly but consistently he would try and break out small parts of your actual personality. encouraging you to actually be yourself.

↪boothill wanted to know the real you. the one that didn't wish to become robotic in a way by hiding their own personality. hiding away one of the main points that made you, you.

↪and he was determined to break you out of that shell.

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn

[bi-bi-buckleys]

Here’s a quick fic I wrote when I was meant to be working. I refuse to accept this new version of Maddie the writers are trying to sell us. Posting before the episode airs so I can live in denial a little longer ❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maddie had just walked out of her favorite local cafe with a modified version of her favorite latte (decafe, low fat sugar free vanilla, ugh) when she sees someone familiar sitting at one of the outdoor tables to her right.

“Tommy!”

Maddie forgot. Just for a second. Just for the split second it took her to say his name. Oh right. You’re not dating my brother anymore.

Oops.

Tommy looks at her like a deer in headlights. He recovers quickly enough and stands from the table.

“Hey, Maddie! How are you?” He’s trying to sound chipper, but after he hugs her she sees the sadness haunting his eyes.

“I’m doing well, how are you?”

“I’m….I’m ok.”

It’s a lie and they both know it.

“How’s Ev-Buck?”

“Heartbroken. Baking every time he thinks to call you. His fridge is packed.”

Tommy smiles sadly and Maddie feels a stab of guilt for telling her brother to move on. She thought Tommy left because he didn’t love Buck, but that’s not the feeling she’s getting right now.

“He asked me to move in with him. But he never said he loved me. He said he admired me.” Tommy blurts out like he hasn’t had a chance to really talk about it.

“Oh.” She didn’t know that part.

“Yeah. And the thing is, I love him. So much. I would love him to be my forever. He’s sweet, and funny, and smart, and ridiculous, and even covered in boils he’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen. He’s everything to me. But how can I commit to moving in with a man who asks me to move in because he admires me? Because what happens when he realizes he doesn’t love me the same way I love him? It wouldn’t just break my heart, Maddie: it would destroy it.”

Maddie can’t see through the tears in her eyes. She’s never heard anyone talk so earnestly about loving her little brother before. She can tell Tommy really means it. He broke both of their hearts that night.

“Sometimes my brother thinks that by saying one thing, the other thing is implied. He gets ahead of himself. I’m sure you’ve noticed that, for as smart as he is, his train of thought can be kinda all over the place.”

Tommy laughs, but it's sad and full of just how much he misses Buck.

“He says he can see a future with you, and I’ve never heard him say that before. He also said your happiness is as important to him as his own. Tommy, he wants to call you so bad but he’s terrified of you turning him down again. He’s been hurt before, but I’ve never seen him this miserable. You should talk to him. I’m not saying move in with him, but I think you should hear what he has to say. And I think you should believe him.”

“Is he working right now?”

“Nope. Last I heard he was making a pineapple upside down bundt cake.”

“Wow.”

“I know. Seriously, his fridge is packed. It’s concerning.”

“Thanks, Maddie. I’m gonna go talk to him.”

Maddie gives him a hug and watches as he practically runs to his car. She laughs and wipes the tears from her eyes. She starts to think that maybe the universe did give her brother his special person after all.

~~~

Later she gets a call

“So you talked to Tommy?” Buck whispers.

“I did. I told him to talk to you.”

“What happened to ‘move on’?”

“That was before he told me all the things he loves about you and that ‘even covered in boils, he’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.”

Buck gives a small laugh, and she can tell he’s blushing. “He uh, h-he really said that?”

“Yes he did. Word for word. So, did you talk?”

“Yeah we uh- we talked. For a long time. About everything.” His voice was even quieter now, but she could hear his happiness.

She knows the answer before she asks, “Why are you whispering?”

“Because Tommy’s asleep next to me.” Maddie can practically see the smile on his face.

“I’ll let you get some sleep, too then.”

“Yeah, I think I probably should,” Buck laughs and Maddie rolls her eyes at the wink wink tone of his voice.

“Goodnight, Evan.”

“Night, Maddie. Oh, uh hey…thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

After they hang up, Maddie can’t stop smiling. Knowing her brother is happy and loved by someone who was willing to put his heart on the line for him. Someone who loves him so much it scares him. Someone who realizes what he walked away from, and went back despite knowing it could end in pain.

Yeah. She’s pretty certain Tommy is Buck’s special person.

[lovetaroandtaemin]

Think About Us

Bang Chan x Reader

Word Count: 4,609 Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff Rating: Explicit, MINORS DNI!

Summary: Y/N struggles with the fact that she almost cheated on Chan before he left for Australia. When he comes back, their relationship goes through a series of ups and downs, forcing them to confront whether they're actually compatible.

Content Warnings: Arguments, toxic relationship, Chan lowkey uses Y/N for sex near the end, mentions of cheating, angst with a bittersweet ending, smut (unprotected sex, creampie, slight daddy kink, breeding kink if you really squint), some alcohol consumption. If you think I missed a warning, please let me know! A/N: This is part 3 to "Start of Something New?" and "Doing This Again!" If you haven't read parts 1 and 2, I definitely recommend doing that first. There will not be a part four.

Fic is under the cut.

The morning after your outing with Felix, you decided to call Chan. Sure, it was partially because you missed him, but it was also because you wanted to ease your guilty conscience by reiterating to your boyfriend how much you loved him. The second he picked up; he started apologizing profusely for losing track of time when the two of you were supposed to be on a date. When you got an opportunity to talk, you apologized too. Initially, he assumed that it was because you didn’t respond to his texts and calls and said, “Honey, I promise you that it’s ok. You were understandably mad at me.”

You decided not to correct his assumption by telling him what you almost did, instead saying, “But that’s not why I didn’t answer. I didn’t answer because I went out with Felix, and I didn’t hear my phone ring.”

“Oh, ok. Where did you go?”

“We went to a club.”

Immediately, Chan was both confused and suspicious. You had never shown an interest in clubs before, so why were you there last night? And without even telling him? He had a feeling that there was something more to what you said, but he decided not to push. Instead, he told you that he loved you before getting ready to board his long flight home.

You spent the entire time that Chan was in Australia thinking about your relationship with him. It had hurt you that he blew you off for the studio so soon after you started to see each other again. However, it was immature and petty to flirt with another guy while he was busy, and you knew that. That doesn’t mean you didn’t still go out with Felix regularly to forget about how much you missed Chan. After what happened the first time, however, you made a conscious effort to behave yourself instead of doing something you would later regret.

Chan’s time in Australia was filled with both joy and sadness. Seeing his family was a blessing, of course, and he was grateful that he had a bit of time to spend with them instead of the usual routine of being stuck on another continent working. At the same time, however, he missed you and the boys a lot. His family’s constant interest in talking about you when he told them the news didn’t exactly help matters.

Hannah was especially pleased to hear that the two of you were back together, threatening to hurt Chan if he didn’t treat you better this time. On top of his sister’s threats, his parents asked him at least once a day when you they would get to see you again. Each time they asked, he promised to talk to you about coming with him for his next visit. He could only hope for his own sake that you’d say yes.

When Chan finally came home, one of the first things he did was ask you to spend the night at the dorm with him. You happily agreed and made your way there after you got done work. Upon arriving at the dorms, however, instead of being greeted by your boyfriend, you were greeted by a concerned Felix. Before you could say a word, he pulled you into a hug and asked, “How are you doing? Is everything ok?”

“I’m alright, Lix. I’m excited to finally see Chan.”

“Are you sure that you’re alright? You’ve been acting different lately.”

“I’m ok, I promise. Thank you for checking on me, though.”

“Any time,” he said, letting you go.

You made your way through the dorm, greeting the rest of the group as you did. Changbin and Jisung smiled when they saw you, relieved that you and Chan hadn’t split up. When you saw Minho, he told you that everyone else would be leaving soon before giving you a knowing smile. You made a mental note of that as you knocked on Chan’s door.

The moment his door was open, Chan pulled you into his room and kissed you. You let out a small sigh at the feeling, ecstatic to have his lips on yours again. When he pulled away from the kiss, he held you so tightly you could barely breathe, a tranquil silence filling the room as the two of you just took in each other’s presence. You stayed that way for what felt like hours before he finally spoke, choosing to break the silence by saying, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Channie.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more.”

“I love you most,” he said before kissing you again. The kiss he greeted you with was soft and gentle, but this one was different. It was more desperate. That’s when you remembered that the two of you hadn’t had sex since before he left, and you couldn’t help but hope that the two of you could change that now that he was home.

Chan had been desperate to feel you the entire time he was gone, but his desperation only intensified when he came back to Korea. Now that you were back in his arms, he could hardly contain himself. As his lips moved against yours, his hands slowly made their way down to your ass. When you felt him squeeze, you let out a soft moan. God, he loved your moans. Hearing you again made it even harder to control himself. As badly as he wanted to be inside you, however he also wanted to take his time with you today. His goal was to make you want him as much as he wanted you.

Little did he know, you already did. You had been thinking about how good he would feel inside of you for weeks, and now that there was a chance to actually feel him, you could barely contain your excitement and arousal. When the feeling of need between your legs was too much to bear, you pulled away from the kiss and said, “Please fuck me, daddy.”

Before you knew it, both of you were naked, and your clothes were in a pile on the floor. Seeing all of you made the last little bit of self-control that he had fly out the window as he dragged you over to his bed. Next thing you knew, he was on top of you, carefully aligning his tip with your entrance. He slowly pushed his hips forward with a groan, and you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding as his cock made its way into you.

Chan waited to move until he was certain you were ready and comfortable. Even when you gave him the green light to start thrusting, he started slowly. He had missed you a lot, and he wanted to savor the moment because for just a little while, nothing mattered except for you underneath him. It was one of his favorite feelings in the world, and one of the many reasons that he loved intimacy with you.

You felt like you were on cloud nine as you felt Chan start to increase the speed of his movements. He knew exactly how you liked to be touched, teased, and fucked; and every time the two of you had sex, he used his knowledge to his advantage. It honestly amazed you how well he still knew your body, especially when you spent such a long time away from each other.

“Fuck, baby girl. You feel so good,” Chan said with a groan.

“Feels so good, daddy. Love how it feels you fuck me.”

Chan let out a loud moan at your words and started fucking into you harder. You held onto him so tightly he was certain that there would be marks when the two of you were done. He wasn’t complaining, of course. He loved it when the two of you got rough. You loved it just as much as he did, if not more.

It didn’t take much longer for Chan to ask, “I’m close, baby. Where do you want it?”

“Inside, please, please, please. Want you to fill me up, daddy.”

That was all Chan needed to hear to still inside of you, his release hitting him like a truck. Feeling him cum inside of you was all you needed to reach your own orgasm, and you came undone around him with a loud moan of his name. As you rode out your highs together, he held you close and told you what a good girl you’d been for him. After you both caught your breath, Chan carefully climbed off of you to help you clean yourself up and get dressed.

Once you were cleaned up and fully clothed, Chan grabbed your hand and pulled you back to his bed to lie down. Then he got up just long enough to get you each a glass of water. He carefully brought the two glasses back to his room, making sure you drank the entire glass before he even considered touching his. Once you did, he finished his own drink and set the glasses aside before and getting back into bed with you. Immediately after he found a comfortable position, he held you like you were going to disappear any second.

“I love you so much, you know that right?” Chan asked before kissing your head.

“I know, I love you too,” you whispered before drifting off to sleep, your boyfriend not far behind you.

When you woke up the next morning, Chan was nowhere to be found. You briefly wondered where he was, but before you could worry too much, he came back into the room with two plates filled with food. He smiled when he saw that you were awake and said, “Good morning, sleepyhead.”

“Good morning, Channie. What’s that?”

“Breakfast. Minho cooked for everyone this morning.”

“Tell him I said thank you, please.”

“I will. Here you go,” he said, handing you one of the plates. The two of you ate in silence, choosing to just enjoy the food as well as each other’s company as you mentally prepared yourselves for the day ahead. Once you were done eating, Chan decided to ask you about what you did while he was away. You told him about all of the times that you went to the club with Felix.

“I thought you didn’t like going to clubs,” Chan said, his suspicions growing.

“So did I, but Felix suggested it and I enjoyed it more than I thought that I would.”

Chan had to admit that he was a bit jealous of your closeness with Felix. He tried not to be the possessive boyfriend that didn’t let his partner have male friends, but he couldn’t help but wonder sometimes if your bond was strictly platonic. If he had taken the time to just ask you or Felix about it, he would have immediately been reassured, and a conversation about boundaries and trust would have happened. However, Chan’s pride prevented him from telling you about how he was feeling, so he said nothing about it. Choosing to ignore his suspicions, he just said, “Hey, by the way, I do need to go to the studio in a little bit.”

“Ok, I need to leave soon for work anyway. I love you.”

“I love you too, princess.”

The two of you got ready together to go about the rest of your day. When it was time for you to go, Chan gave you a kiss on your forehead before leaving for a studio session with Changbin and Jisung. You left shortly after to go to work. Your day was long and boring, and you texted Chan about it to complain several times. He didn’t respond to your texts, but you assumed that he was busy. When you tried to call after work, however, he still didn’t answer. You hoped that he wasn’t still at the studio, but you wouldn’t have been surprised if he was. So, you sent one more text telling him that you loved him and went about your evening at your apartment.

Three days passed without hearing from Chan. Even when you dated the first time, you never went more than 24 hours without at least a text telling you that he was ok. At this point you were worried sick, so you decided to call one of the guys to make sure that nothing bad had happened. In the end you chose to call Minho because you knew that if something had gone wrong, he would be the one most likely to be handling everything in Chan’s place.

When your name flashed on Minho’s phone as it rang, he was surprised to say the least. The two of you had never been close, so he wondered why you were calling him as opposed to Chan or Felix. Still, he picked up his phone and said, “Hello?”

“Hey, Min. Is Chan ok?”

“Yeah, he’s sitting right next to me, actually. Why?”

“I haven’t heard from him in three days.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Minho asked, the sudden anger obvious in his voice.

“I’m not trying to start a problem, I just wanted to make sure that he’s safe. We’ve never gone more than a day without talking before.”

“He is safe, and you’re not starting a problem. I’ll handle it, I promise.”

“Please don’t–”

Minho hung up before you could finish speaking and turned to Chan. Even before Minho spoke, Chan was nervous. He had heard part of the phone call, and he knew that he was going to be in trouble from the tone in his friend’s voice.

“Hey, Chan, why did (Y/N) just call me and tell me that she hasn’t heard from you in three days?”

“It has not been 3 days,” Chan mumbled as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Oh my god, it’s been 3 days.”

“Make it right, Chan.” The tone in Minho’s voice as he spoke made it clear that although Chan was the leader of the group, he needed to listen to his friend.

Chan quickly called you and apologized, telling you that he had lost track of time and forgotten to reply to your texts. You didn’t really believe him, but you chose not to press the issue. After all, he was safe, and that was what mattered. He also promised to make it up to you and asked you to accompany him to your favorite restaurant for dinner that night, which significantly brightened your spirits. After you accepted his apology and his invitation, you hung up and got ready to go.

The date went better than you expected it to, if you were being honest with yourself. The entire time you were at the restaurant, Chan’s sole focus was you. It was selfish, and you knew it, but that was all that you wanted. You wanted your boyfriend to treat you like a priority instead of an option. The success of your date gave you hope that your relationship would improve.

Chan regretted not taking you on a date like this sooner after the two of you got back together. Seeing you excited was one of his favorite things, and he loved giving you excuses to get dressed up because he loved to show you off. And he would certainly be showing you off at the restaurant. You’d done your makeup in a style that was simple, but still flattered your features. Your hair was styled in an elegant updo. Sure, that was done so you could avoid looking like a mess if you left your hair down, but he didn’t need to know that. Chan’s favorite part of your look was your dress. It was a navy-blue cocktail dress that accentuated your curves perfectly. Frankly, he was in awe when you got into his car.

The date at the restaurant mostly went the way you expected, with one exception. At the end of your meal, Chan apologized to you for not texting or calling you after you left the dorm a few days before, and in general for how he’d treated you since the two of you got back together. He explained that he’d been busier than usual with Stray Kids’ upcoming comeback, and he truly did not realize how much time had passed. You wanted to be angry with him, you really did, but you really couldn’t stay mad when you saw the look of pure guilt on his face.

When Chan dropped you off at your apartment after your date, he promised you that he would treat you better. He swore to put in more effort when it came to your relationship, and he swore to prioritize you more often. You would have been lying if you’d said that you weren’t hopeful that your relationship could actually be better this time. Hearing Chan promise to be different was the exact reassurance that you needed that he still loved you.

The hope that you had when you left the restaurant barely lasted a week. To be fair, Chan did start putting in more effort when it came to your relationship. However, did that effort last? No, it did not. It took a concerningly short amount of time for him to fall back into his new habit of not responding to you for days at a time. Each time, you tried to have a conversation with him about how much it worried you when you didn’t hear from him, but he would just say that he was trying. At the end of each conversation, you found that you had less and less faith in his apparently empty promises.

The exception to that, of course, was that Chan texted you every single time he was in the mood to fuck. Whenever he was stressed about the new album or a fight with one of the other members, you were the first person he called to blow off some steam. At first, you didn’t necessarily mind it. You liked being able to help your boyfriend take his mind off of the things that bothered him, and he was good in bed after all. As the pattern continued, however, you found yourself feeling used and worthless.

You realized that something had to give on a random night when he called you to ask if he could come over. He’d been stressed about work deadlines, and he of course wanted to fuck the stress away. You told him that he could come to your apartment, and the two of you did what you always did.

The sex was mediocre this time, probably because of the increasing disconnect between the two of you, but the aftercare was incredible. You had no idea why, but he was more attentive than he’d ever been whenever he gently coaxed you out of subspace and helped you feel more like yourself. That was always the case. It was strange, really. Even if the sex wasn’t good, you could count on the aftercare being great. If you were being honest with yourself, it was probably the main reason you let the games continue as long as they did.

The feeling that Chan still loved you started to fade when he quietly asked, “Will you be ok if I go back to the dorms for tonight instead of sleeping here? Jisung just texted me and asked me to help him with a song.”

You badly wanted to say no and beg him to stay just for the night, but you knew better than to get in the way of his work at this point. Instead of begging for attention from your boyfriend, you just replied, “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Go ahead.”

“Ok, I love you. I’ll text you when I get home.”

You waited for the rest of the night, but he never texted you. Instead, he went right to the studio with Jisung and went back to writing what was going to be Stray Kids’ new album. You knew that it would happen. In your mind this was just another example of what really seemed like his lack of care for you. He was incredibly loving when he wanted to be, like after sex or when he was apologizing to you when something he did hurt you. The problem was, he frequently acted like you either didn’t exist or like you were just a toy to him. You desperately wanted to hold on to the relationship because of how much you loved the good parts, but in the end, you decided that enough was enough.

The opportunity to have the conversation that you knew needed to happen presented itself about a week later when Felix invited you to yet another movie night at the dorm. This time Jisung wanted to watch “Spirited Away.” To tell the truth, you were conflicted. On the one hand, you loved spending time with the guys and didn’t want to ruin the night by arguing with Chan. On the other hand, you didn’t know when you would see Chan again in person to have the conversation that you knew you needed to have. In the end, you decided that this conversation was too important to not happen, though you were upset that you wouldn’t be able to enjoy the movie night with your friends.

When you got to the dorm, it was Chan that greeted you outside instead of Felix. He hugged you and tried to kiss your cheek, but you moved out of the way and told him that the two of you needed to talk. Your frustrated tone caught him by surprise, but he agreed. Once he let you into the dorm, quickly greeted the rest of the group and followed Chan to his room.

“What do you wanna talk about?” he asked, nervous about what was about to happen.

“Since you’ve gotten home, you’ve only talked to me for sex or when Minho yells at you. Why?”

To say that Chan was surprised by your question was an understatement. He knew that he had been distant, anyone would be with how he had been feeling, but he hadn’t realized the extent of it. It was wrong to ignore you, and he knew it, but he also didn’t think that he wanted to continue the relationship anymore. Still, he tried to give a flimsy excuse by saying, “I didn’t do it on purpose. I’ve just been so busy since the album, and- “

“Are you serious? Stop blaming it on work, Chan. I know there’s more to it than that. You’ve been busy with work before, but you’ve never gone days at a time without so much as a text to let me know you were safe. You’ve been busy with work before, but you’ve never treated me like I was nothing to you but a sex doll.”

“Do not accuse me of treating you that way.”

“Is it an accusation if it’s true? We only talk when you wanna fuck because you’re stressed.”

With a deep sigh, Chan said, “Fine, do you want me to tell you why I’ve been distant?”

“Yes! That’s why we’re having this conversation!”

“Felix told me that something happened at the club the night before I left.”

“What the fuck did he tell you?”

“He said that he saw you dancing a guy, and that you were crying when you left.”

“I met this guy, and we talked and danced. Nothing beyond that.”

“Then why were you crying?” You were quiet for a moment, and he added, “That’s what I thought. It was guilt, wasn’t it? You never cry unless you feel guilty. Even if nothing else happened, you probably wanted it to, right? To get back at me for forgetting about our date?”

The argument only continued to escalate as the two of you tore apart each other’s flaws and threw your own insecurities in each other’s faces. You still wanted to try to work everything out until he accused you of sleeping with Felix. That was when you said, “I am not fucking Felix. He’s my friend, and he always has been. It is not his fucking fault that you’re so worried about what I do when you’re not around you can’t bring yourself to give a fuck about me when you are.”

“Get out,” Chan spat in response.

“Gladly.”

You stormed out of Chan’s room, gave hasty goodbyes to the rest of the guys, and drove back to your apartment. When you got there, you blocked Chan on as many apps as you could and sent Felix a quick text explaining that you and Chan were done. Then, you shut your phone off and sobbed, hating yourself for getting back into a relationship with someone that you knew from the start would only hurt you in the end.

A few months after you left the Stray Kids dorm for the last time, you found yourself at a familiar nightclub. Even when you and Chan were together, it was one of your favorite places to go when you needed to distract yourself from difficult emotions. Tonight, you were missing your ex, which meant you badly needed a distraction.

The distraction that you needed ended up coming in the form of Hongjoong, the guy that you’d met during your first visit to this particular establishment. He flashed you a smile when he saw you and asked how you had been, excited to be dancing with you again. You kept your answers brief, choosing to flirt shamelessly instead of getting overly personal. He was amused by your boldness, but he still matched your energy. The two of you danced while you talked, and it made you feel better for a little while.  Maybe your relationship with Chan had ended, but that didn’t mean that you had to be sad forever.

Chan hated going to clubs. He always had. They were far louder than he liked, and he hated crowded spaces. When Changbin and Jisung asked him to go out to celebrate the group’s latest comeback, he wanted to say no. However, he knew that they were only asking because they thought he needed to get out more, so he reluctantly agreed. He would soon regret his decision, wishing he’d stayed home instead.

Almost immediately after walking into the club, he spotted you. You were laughing and dancing with a guy that wasn’t him, and it hurt to see another man be the reason you were smiling. It had been months, but he still loved you and wanted you to be his. However, when he considered all that had happened between you, he knew it wasn’t meant to be. While he still loved you, the two of you were far too toxic together. So, he went right to the bar and ordered a drink in an attempt to ignore the fact that you were across the room. As he sat at the bar, he found himself unable to stop thinking about you. At least, he couldn’t stop thinking about you until Ryujin sat on the stool next to him.

Whether it was the desire to get over you, the desire to get back at you, or some combination of the two, Chan would never know. However, when he saw your former best friend sitting next to him, he decided to strike up a conversation. She looked gorgeous, after all, and he had been desperate for a distraction from you. As they sat at the bar and caught up, he started to feel just a little bit better. Maybe he couldn’t have you, but that didn’t mean that he couldn’t have anyone.

Thank you so much to everyone that has shown continued support for this accidental mini-series! It was so much fun for me to write. I can only hope that y'all enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. If you like what you read, please consider liking, reblogging, and checking out my masterlist! If nothing there catches your attention, or you want to see something specific, feel free to send a request via my asks or dms!

Once again, thank you for reading!

[mae-i-scribble]

So I'm not really that into Arcane fandom or anything like that but is anyone else a little worried for how season 2 is progressing thus far? I'm not talking about the apparent Caitlyn vitriol that some people are falling into- god forbid you have complex characters am I right. But watching the first act of season 2 it's all so terribly rushed and not in the same way season 1 had fast pacing but with tight writing to make up for it.

Spoilers for the first 3 episodes ahead but the fact that we barely even get to know the new enforcer characters that come to Zaun annoys me. The most we have is the girl introducing herself to Vi. The other two aren't even named in the show let alone have any sort of personality. For the big shield guy why is he even allowed to be an enforcer???? Sir you were seemingly living on the streets drinking away your problems last I checked with no indication you were or wanted to be an enforcer. The kid that follows Jinx around doesn't even have any sort of lines until episode 3- which would be fine if it was clearly a deliberate choice for her character but considering that the show is trying to juggle so much it just feels like she fell to the wayside.

I'm also very much not a fan of how the 2nd season is structuring its storylines thus far- certain scenes loose their tension because they're so intercut with other scenes happening simultaneously- take the vi and jinx fight for example. Like I get it you wanted to show how them interacting with the run was actively interfering with the fight but the constant cuts back and forth leave a bad taste in my mouth. The structure they use for the various sections with music overplaying them are hit or miss to me- some I love, some I think should have been actual scenes with dialogue.

I'm also really sad to see them seemingly rush over bits of character development we really need to see. Like take Vi- her not wanting to be an enforcer is 200% justifiable and believable, we haven't been shown anything about how the enforcers work that would give Vi a reason to want to join. And then after the attack in episode 1 she silently comes to a decision to join which fine, I can buy her wanting to help now that Zaun is conducting terrorist attacks. But she just agreed to the plan to use the gray against the people of Zaun???? Really???? Vi did??? Shouldn't Vi, someone who is only joining the enforcers out of desperate necessity, be way more critical of any use of force in the undercity? There's even little things like when Caitlyn arrests the henchman I was expecting Vi to stand up for him because almost *everyone* in the undercity is some sort of criminal so that they can survive. But no it just turns into Vi asking them to ditch the side characters we know absolutely nothing about.

Speaking of Vi- for the record the cait/vi kiss in my opinion was stupidly forced in. I would have liked to see their relationship develop this season because in season 1 I could see the beginning of something there. I really loved the moment in the first episode where it's only when seeing Vi that Caitlyn breaks down a little because Vi is someone she can trust to be open with. Great stuff to further develop- oh no they're kissing after no development just to make the immediately following break up more dramatic? Great yay yippee representation -_- Don't get me wrong I would have loved to see it develop into a romance but not in episode 3 with no buildup (1st season does not count as buildup to me for an actual romantic relationship).

This is also somewhat petty but I do hate the fact that Ambessa is revealed to be behind the memorial attack in episode 3- I much would have preferred for that information to be revealed to the audience alongside whatever character discovers it. Revealing it like that is dramatic, sure, but I feel like it ruins the mystery of Ambessa's morality in a way that is not satisfying.

All in all I'm not the happiest with these first 3 episodes but we'll have to see how the other 2 arcs go before making any judgement calls overall.

[atangledfate]

Stop Saving People, sometimes he wanted to do just that to, just leave it all behind. But Surge was right he could never do that. not just because of a promise he made to her, but he couldn't bare the thought of someone else dying when he had the power to stop it. Surge and he were different, built different, and he didn't want to be like his father. He was already to much like him with all the drifting from place to place. But if he just stopped being the good person then who would he even be? He still felt so much anger deep down at himself for being so damn weak.

He sighed

" Guess you got me there, i couldn't sit and watch knowing i could do something. Guess we are just built different... "

He snorted at Surge as he stretched his arms behind his back

" You do know the locked me up before right? didn't stop them then... guess things are a bit different now... but you are right, let's motor... i dun wanna think about it anymore. Let's just cross that road when we get there..."

He gave surge a glance considering Kit and he felt like she missed his point entirely. Kit seemed so attached to her. Could he even exist with out her? He remembered how he acted when he thought she died... it was sad to watch.

" Surge... all i know is... When he thought you bought the big one. He broke ya know... he couldn't function. I hope he's better now i hope he's grown. But i don't think he'll handle this as well as you are hoping... i'm just--- worried about you two ok? its just--- who i am i guess..."

He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck

" Eh what ever, i'll keep my word so let's go before i say anything else stupid..."

===============================================

Back then, when Kit thought that Surge was gone. It almost felt like he and Tails could have been friends then. But fate wasn't so kind and, the shock of Surge being alive had only drove a wedge between them again. He couldn't expect Kit to set aside his personal feelings though but it would have been nice wouldn't it? Just to have someone brainy to talk to. It was always hard knowing you couldn't win someone over. But it wasn't the first time he'd felt this way--- it happened to often in the orphanage.

" No... it's fair... i get it. Let's just focus on the task at hand yea... "

Deep down though it did kind of hurt that Kit wasn't interested in being a friend or a comrade. Though it did feel better knowing there wasn't any hate there anymore. Maybe it was a s good a step forward as he could hope for.

" I doubt he'll be ok with closing the doors entirely. Though making a check point with some defensive features sounds good. Yea... i wonder what her limit is... were at least ten or so at a glance...that's alot of back up if we had to. Though... i have zero clue how good she'd be in a fight. "

" Hmm though maybe she doesn't need to fight... just look like she can fight. If enemy sees enough units they won't be so keen on busting in all willy nilly. Let's head back inside and see what we can work out with the doc and his nurses... besides, keeping the injured safe should also be a priority "

"Then stop saving people and you'll get that wish real fucking quick. Though we both know you aren't going to do that, so you're stuck with it." Surge was sure Sonic could easily focus on only bashing Eggman's bots, though he always went out of his way to save people. "They don't got to like you to admit you're considered a hero on Mobius. At this point if they lock you up then entire planet will be up in arms." The tenrec was sure that's the last thing GUN needs to deal with.

"No, though I'm sure a lot of people would see it has a start. Besides, I'm sure it's better than when I was staying in run down Eggman base's." Surge then rolled her eyes with Sonic bringing up they'd want to use her. "Of course they'd want to use me, though telling them to bite me is easy enough. Whenever they ask for my help it'll be on my terms, not there's." The tenrec wasn't going to be used by GUN or anyone else ever again.

"And you can cut the crap on trying to guilt trip me with Drippy. Use you're head a little bit. Do you really think I'd ask you to take him home if I wasn't sure someone would be there for him. I ain't going into detail, though you'll see what I mean." Surge was clearly trying to keep hush hush about it. The tenrec's attention went to the Mother Wisp now over the base and then to hearing Lanolin's orders from her comm.

"Well, guess everyone is coming back to the base so GUN is about to have more fucking problems. Let's just go to the checkpoint already. I'm sure between us and the giant fucking Wisp whoever is in charge might actually come down and talk to us." Surge was guessing on that, though two people moving at the speed of sound and a Wisp that big should hopefully motivate them to talk.

===========================================================

"Then we can stop talking about it, and you can hopefully accept the fact I don't want to be your friend." Kitsunami couldn't say they were enemies anymore, and was sure they'd be more times down the road when they'd form an alliance once again. "If this is about the time I called you and Sonic a liar I'm sure he was convinced that Surge was actually gone. I was also too shocked to see Surge still alive to even consider the device was hurting her." The fennec was willing to admit his mistakes.

"We would if Lanolin would've approved my plans for secret bunkers that didn't show up on the blueprints. The only place would be the sewers, though Belle Bot would then be too far underground." Kitsunami's main reason for wanting the bunkers was pure paranoia, though it looked like they would've come in handy. "It's a mute point, though maybe here is the best. A few people are battle ready, and we're also here. Not ideal, though it's the best plan I got."

"With all that said, it might be wise to start barricading the door. Assuming the head doctor wouldn't have a problem with it. I recall them mentioning the nurse's ability, though that can only go so far." Kitsunami was clearly assuming the worse which would be a fire fight breaking out.

[beauty-and-passion]

CCCC Vol.1 - Concord: end and beginning (2/2)

Hello and welcome to the final part of this analysis.

Oh boy, what a long ride it has been! But now, it’s time for the last recap, so we can finally wrap the loop - and connect it to the beginning, as Chonny intended.

So, what happened until now?

We know the story is a loop. The starting point of this loop is an event, a calamity, that leads to a split in Chonny’s mind between Heart, Mind and Soul: a failed romance (probably)

At first, the three sides tried to cooperate as one, but then Mind started to point out the flaws in Chonny’s plan to confess to his crush

Scared by Mind’s influence, Heart intervenes, tries to subdue him (the Juno Incident) and pushes Chonny to confess. Chonny doesn’t: he misses his shot and so does Heart

Overwhelmed by apathy, Heart leaves full control to Mind

Mind tries everything to get a reaction out of Heart

When he fails, Soul intervenes and they get reunited again

The joy of being whole again gives Chonny a rush of optimism and enough confidence to revisit his memories of the failed romance.

And now, here we are. Chonny remembered what happened. What will he do now? What did he already do in all of the previous loops?

<- Previous post - First post

_______________________________

Greener: declaration of intent

Right after the end of this failed romance, Chonny does the most human thing ever: he wants to talk about it. And since he’s an artist, what better way to do it, if not by using the artform he knows?

This song is a declaration of intent: Chonny wants to talk about his experience - but not just that. His mind is dark, twisted and chaotic, so why just talk about one experience, when he can let out some of this internal turmoil too? As he said in the Q&A, he wanted to talk about duality and logic vs emotions, so why not add them to the story he wanted to tell? Why just talk about a failed romance, when he can expand it by showing the contrasts in his own mind through Heart, Mind and Soul’s characters?

Chonny starts to think about this. He wants to do it and he states it with these words:

Wherever this goes, whatever ensues These songs are my own, these songs aren't for you But still, I'm so glad you're listening

Chonny reconfirms what he said since Mucka Blucka: he’s not writing these songs for the public but for himself. To better understand himself, his own mind and that duality of logic/emotions he’s (rightfully) fascinated about.

That also confirms he’s a real artist, because artists don’t make art for others: they make it primarily for themselves. Not because they’re heartless, but because making art is a need. When I write, it’s because I’m pushed to do it. It’s because I have a weight on my chest or words in my head or images that keep repeating - and the only way to calm them down (and calm myself) is by putting them on paper. It’s like breathing: you just have to do it, to feel better, more satisfied and more complete.

Even though the public isn’t the primary reason behind art, every artist wants a public and every artist is immensely grateful a public exists. Even if the art is personal, knowing that someone else got something from your work, experienced, lived it… it makes everything even more important. You’re sharing a part of yourself and someone else, no matter if it’s next door or on the other side of the ocean, accept it and react to it.

And I want to focus a bit on the last point, because art is all about human connection. You’re reaching people you will never reach nor meet and with something you created, you touched them. You made them happy, sad, angry, it doesn’t matter: you still influenced them and they reacted to it. You made a connection and I can assure you, 90% of the artists need it to feel less alone.

This is what makes art so precious: it’s not just a way for us to express ourselves, but also to get a connection with another being. To not just be in our place, alone, but find others, talk to them, talk with them.

If Chonny hadn’t made this album, cj-anon would’ve never told me about that. I wouldn’t make these posts. You wouldn’t interact with them. We wouldn’t talk, connect, have fun together. We would be alone. If we’re not, it’s only thanks to art.

_______________________________

Special: inner fears

Chonny has a plan, a story he wants to tell, things he want to talk about. So, what’s the first feeling he get right after this planning?

Asking himself if he’s special or not.

Mood.

Seriously, when has anyone started doing anything, by thinking “Man, I’m so great and this will go as smoothly as I planned it”? Of course Chonny questions himself, of course he’s full of doubts. And it’s even worse in his case, considering he’s full of dark thoughts and recently came out of a failed romance - failed because he didn’t give it a try, because why should his crush stay with him? He’s not special at all.

So, again, very understandable.

But while in the past (and in the future of the loop), Chonny would’ve surrendered to these thoughts, now he thinks he can find a way to cheer, by switching perspective (aka “the key change”).

And it works:

So maybe I'm unique and maybe not But I might as well deliver all I've got

He’s still full of doubts, he still don’t know if he’s special or not. But he’s an artist and making songs is “what I can do” (The Whole World & You). So he will do it.

_______________________________

Taken for a Ride: a perfect conclusion

I have two possible interpretations for this song.

1) This song is meta from the real Chonny

The real Chonny (not the character) takes center stage to talk about his whole album: he explains the thinking process behind the writing of every song, his goals, the problems he faced. He emphasizes how personal this whole album is, because he poured a lot of himself inside it (“my blood, my sweat, my open doors”).

And now, the story is over. He’s aware of the missing parts/explanations, but there wasn’t a beginning either. And why shouldn’t there be a beginning or an ending? He’s still young, he still has a lot of years ahead. Maybe his story hasn’t begun yet. Maybe the real obstacles will come in the future.

For now, all he knows is that he’s whole again. He told the story he wanted to tell, he reached Concord and now his artistic need is satisfied. He doesn’t need to write more, at least for now.

And yet, his public asks for more.

However, Chonny doesn’t give a straight answer. By mentioning his public, he acknowledges people want more. He’s aware of that - and who knows? Maybe this will push him to write more in the future.

For now, he knows people want more from him. Maybe, when the artistic need wakes up again, he will make more songs and tell another story.

2) This song is still part of the storyline

In Special, Chonny said he would “deliver all I’ve got” and so he did. He made an entire album, to talk about his failed romance and all the themes he wanted to explore.

So, he talks/remembers the process behind the writing, his goals, his difficulties. He makes it clear he poured all of himself in it, as he promised (“my blood, my sweat, my open doors”).

Now the album is done, the story is told.

And the public’s reactions is strong. Stronger than he expected. They want more songs, more covers, more of him.

So... what happened? Well, we can guess from the previous hints scattered throughout the album:

Chonny is a man with dark thoughts, anxiety and low self-esteem

In The Heart Acoustic, Heart said “as complacency settles, anxieties will rise/And part this Soul as Jekyll parted Hyde”

Over and over Chonny will point out all he does are covers

And this part of Time Machine:

So, look Oh God, look at what you've done now to me Locked into eternity I'll be back here one day, so they say Rumors have that I will write a different song Trying to get it right all afternoon

I believe Chonny’s mind started to spiral. What if people liked his songs, only because they were covers? What if all they wanted wasn’t him, but to listen to songs made by others? Was he even able to write anything by himself?

His anxiety rose, while his self-esteem sank: he was stuck in a loop, always making the same covers. He wasn’t able to get out, not while his mind kept spiraling down. The “me left on the shelf” (aka Mind) was put aside, while Heart and his chaotic feelings were taking control.

Therefore, this song becomes the starting point of Time Machine: a man with a confused, fractured mind. A man who wasn’t believing in himself. A man who was stuck always doing the same thing. A man closed in a loop, in which he doesn’t feel like he will go out and is forced to relive the failure that started the loop in the first place.

That makes CCCC a loop that keeps repeating over memories of what happened. The first time, Chonny failed his romance, wrote the album, anxiety took over, made him feel he wasn’t able to achieve anything by himself, and started the loop. The loop is a constant reminder of how much of a failure he is, only to cheer himself up, to fall again into a new depressive cycle.

I don’t know if this second interpretation is correct and Chonny said it’s up to us to interpret his album as we want. But from someone this skilled and clever, I like to think he played a lot with metaphors and tragedy, so I prefer this second interpretation too. Also because it connects extremely well to Time Machine and what kind of loop would it be, if the beginning and end don’t coincide?

_______________________________

In conclusion

It took me an eternity to make this analysis of the whole CCCC album - and I was trying to restrain myself. Just imagine the endless pages if I let myself ramble about every little stupid thing XD

But I really, really wanted to talk about this album. It has been a wonderful surprise and I enjoyed it a lot. It was clever, it was interesting, it was funny. And Chonny really has a way with words. Good for you, mate, I wish you a great career.

Also, there were you all. You, with your kind replies, reblogs and your incredible affection. I've been in several fandoms and, despite being small, this is one of the nicest I've ever seen.

So, for you all who stayed with me until the end: thank you. Thank you for all the time you spent here, with me, listening and appreciating my ramblings. I hope those posts have been a good reading and you enjoyed yourself as much as I did by writing them <3

If Chonny makes something else, maybe we will meet again in the future to talk about him and CCCC again. Or maybe, we will meet in some other posts soon. Who knows? If the future can still hold a lot for him, why not for us too? ;)

Thank you for your time and always take care of yourself <3

(How about a coffee? ☕)

_______________________________

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[skunkes]

[sysig]

Ah, childhood memories (Patreon)

[ts-janus-rp-blog]

Charles frowned and shook his head, he instead pointed at his chest hoping he would get it. Though...he doubts he would. When the door suddenly opened and Logan came over to hug Virgil, he blinked, and he simply watched the family with a wide eyes. Huh... He sorta wished he could have that one of these days... Someone who...truly cared about him and if he was okay. Cause, yeah, he has Logan but... Logan has other things to worry about, so does Virgil, so he's not sure if they count. And... He moved to slide on the bed with Virgils help, and as he sat there he continued to watch the family...an almost sad look in his eyes.

"I know! I'm sure it did happen fast but it freaked me out when I woke up and you were gone! Honestly, I didn't know what to think at first! It's okay! I just... I was just blindly panicking. It's not your fault. I'm sorry." Logan rambled off as he handed the screaming Poe over to Virgil.

Almost the moment that Poe was handed over to Virgil... He went quiet. His dark eyes looked up to take Virgil in and his wings reached up to touch Virgils face. It's really Virgil... It's really him... It seemed like nothing that Virgil was saying was really comprehending in Poe's mind, but as he started touching Virgil's face more... He let out a soft giggle. He continued giggling until he was being nuzzled and kissed on, then he squealed and kicked his legs. Aw, there's the happy boy again.

"Oh, thank fucking God you were able to shut him up!! Fuck!! I thought he would never shut up!" Sarah praised, "Now that that's done I'm gonna go take a long fucking nap. You guys are too exhausting to deal with!" And...with that she left. Alrighty.

"Oh, thanks, Sarah for bringing them back! That was nice of you and-" Logan was cut off by the deep kiss, which he happily leaned into. Once they broke it off, Logan's face was bright red. He giggled shyly and looked away, "I... I... I..." Aw, and there's happy Logan again! He blushed even more at the nose nuzzle, his wide eyes staring at Virgil. Finally, he let out another high pitched giggle. "I missed you too... Now um... I'll take Poe back and you get cleaned up? Cause like..." He grimaced as he took in that outfit again, "No offense, Hun, but that outfit looks awful on you. You do not look good in Janus' work outfit, ugh."

HazbinSidesRP-P27-HazbinSidesRP

TW: Rape. Misgendering. Swearing. Blood. Demons. Janus is Valentino.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

↣P1-P20, P21, P22, P23, P24, P25, P26↢

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@ts-janus-rp-blog

[PREVIOUS REPLY]

Charles paused again when he heard their gasp, but his gaze went up to him just as they opened their legs. Guess that means they're not upset with him. He went back to kissing their nipple, but, his body started moving further and further down their body, kissing the entire way down. He paused when he met their booty shorts. He fiddled with it to unhook it, then he opened up the package. His face went in to kiss between their legs. All the while he leaned into Remys fingers.

Janus snickered, "Just wait, she'll throw away this opportunity."

"oh, yeah, baby~ Right there~" the wolf purred as Virgil started kissing his neck. And then he gasped when he felt the nibble, and Virgils sharp fangs. "Oh~ Were getting kinky here now?" He purred out, enjoying every little bit of nibbles and kisses. He moaned into the kiss once they got there and he eagerly kissed him back. He stuck his tongue deep into Virgils mouth. As his tongue explored his mouth His arms wrapped around Virgils small body to pull him closer so his tongue could enter his mouth further. One of his hands reached up to play with Virgils messed up hair. His hard cock was now against Virgil's lower stomach and Virgil would be able to feel his cock twitching with their kiss. Gross.

Finally, he pulled away and he smiled to Virgil. "See? That wasn't so hard, now was it? That was all I wanted, just a simple kiss." He hummed, "Now my lollipop feels a bit lonely... Why not give it some attention, Hun?"

[phoenixcatch7]

Loz fandom stop being angsty and give the daydreaming kids on big fun adventures with a cool glowing sword some actual whimsy and joy challenge

[curioscurio]

not to be a freak but I think when Trump loses he will either kill himself or Putin will let loose the real assasins. it's just the smart move like he knows too much and he's losing all the power he used to have lol. like if I were putin I'd be worried about what kind of information a desperate man like Trump is willing to surrender once he's caught 👀

[fear-no-mort]

i cant get over the whole time in the real world rick just sat there watching over morty and when he woke up finally rick sounded SO happy the way he just yelled his name excitedly the second he woke up,,,

[chiimeramanticore]

I think tumblr underestimated how fervently we would all start booping each other. I genuinely don't think they expected people to have their meters maxing out this quickly