#the shortest engagement ever

[bobbie-robron]

Now, close your eyes and imagine us here in two years. (Part 1)

Robert takes Katie to a field, a field where Robert hopes to build a home for them. It is at this time he proposes to Katie and she enthusiastically says yes! Gifs will be posted separately (these two are just a tease).

08-May-2005

[foldingfittedsheets]

I’d like to entertain and enliven you now with the saga of my Slut Era.

I’ve always been a serial monogamist and my shortest long term relationships clocked in at three years. So perhaps that’s why when I finally broke it off with my ex I went insane on dating. Part of it was definitely just that between anxiety and loneliness I wanted to fill up my time.

This happened when I was living alone for the first time, no roommates, just me and my little cat Leeloo. I didn’t want to come home to an empty house so instead I set up dates.

Most of these were disastrous. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I had a lot more first dates than second because they’d seen enough, including the one where people aggressively complimented me.

But after a few months I had four people I was seeing simultaneously. I was up front with all of them that things were not exclusive, and they all agreed, so no infidelity took place here, just a lot of hijinks.

Here’s who was on the dating roster:

• An apprentice woodworker that we’ll call Jill. I honestly thought at 26 years old that her being 21 wasn’t a problem age gap and I quickly learned that there was a vast gulf of both maturity and life experience between us. Jill described herself as “heteroflexible” and had just dumped her first boyfriend to flirt it up with me.

• A married woman looking for a friends with benefits. We’ll call her Alice. I insisted on meeting her husband first to be sure I wasn’t part of a cheating mess and he gave me his blessing when I stayed over at her house. Years later when he and Alice had divorced I would go on to sell him and his new fiancée an engagement ring and we both realized at the end how we knew each other and it was wildly awkward. Alice was nice, but a hardcore vegan who insisted I brush my teeth if I so much as ate string cheese before I could kiss her. She was also unhappy in her marriage and was feeling out if I’d want to get serious.

• A bartender dubbed Snakebites, so called because of her signature piercings. She cooked me a steak so raw it was still mooing and some of the best asparagus I’d ever had. In our singular sexy encounter she bit my nipple and I never got over it. Really don't bite someone if you don't know their preference and work up in pressure. We weren’t terribly compatible but neither of us were willing to admit it yet. Truthfully I considered still dating her solely because I desperately wanted her bathroom. It had all black tile, black toilet, black sink, a rain shower in the corner and a jacuzzi tub. I may not have loved her but god I loved that bathroom.

And finally,

• My beloved, who I would go on to marry, who was dealing with a lot of personal stuff at the time. Obviously that meant I liked them the best of all the people I was seeing because we were both disasters at the time.

So that’s the cast of this little misadventure. Now, our story begins with Jill.

Jill was someone who heightened my anxiety. Each of the three times she came to my home she brought and left more stuff. A self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans collection of DVDs. It was like she was trying to move in. She also liked to deride my taste in things, frequently calling me a pleb when I mentioned a band or show I liked.

She was working on a gorgeous little decorative table in her woodworking program. The main wood for the top had a beautiful dapple of knots like jaguar spots, and when she showed me a picture I exclaimed how pretty it was.

“Do you want it?”

“Oh- I mean it’s lovely, I wouldn’t mind having it, but you should sell it and make some money!”

But she was adamant. She’d give me the little side table. At about this time, Alice was starting to get awfully lovey for a FWB. I knew she wasn’t happy with her husband but I also knew we were not a good fit. Fun fact: Alice and her husband were step siblings with a pretty hefty age gap. They got together when he stumbled upon a kink photo shoot she’d done with vegetables. None of their family was happy about the relationship but they weren’t related by blood so it was fine.

So I was fending off more overt romantic advances from Alice, and feeling increasingly like I needed to break things off with Jill. Snakebites wasn’t ever initiating communication and I decided to pull a lot of plugs at once.

I ghosted Snakebites, told Alice that I thought we should cool it, and in a move worthy of a rom-com I asked my beloved if I could pretend we were exclusive to put off Jill. They agreed and I texted Jill to let her know that I was no longer single.

I was not prepared for Jill’s response. She. Was. Devastated. She flew off the handle. She’d just been waiting for the right time to tell me how she felt about me! How dare I do this to her!

What about the table?!

“You should keep the table, it’s gorgeous, you’ll be able to sell it, but I don’t expect a free table.”

Silence met me after that text. I worried and fretted and eventually headed home.

There on my doorstep. The table.

It was a small little end table, reeking of oil and polish, but very beautiful. I brought it inside. The little drawer didn’t even have a knob or guide rails. But it did have a handwritten bill proclaiming that it was costing me $500.

“I can’t afford a $500 table, Jill!” I texted.

“Well you kept saying how nice it was. I spent a lot of time on it.”

“I’m not saying it’s not worth $500” (it wasn’t, it was a tiny side table made by an apprentice) “but I can’t buy a $500 table.”

“Make me an offer.”

I stared at the little table. I did actually like it, but I worried about the repercussions of entering into this deal. Hesitantly I typed back, “$300.” I didn’t think it was worth that much but I didn’t want to insult her too badly.

This suited her for the night. But the next day she informed me she needed a new bed, and that she’d take her $300 in credit toward a new mattress. I spent the whole next day basically wrangling with her over what she wanted and eventually she spiked back up to demanding $500 for the damn table.

“Let me just give it back,” I begged. It was not the first, second, or even third time I’d asked to return the thing but this time she finally relented and gave me her address. Since she lived with her parents still I’d never been over.

I called up my beloved and said, “Hey, I need moral support, can you run an errand with me?”

They agreed which is how we loaded up a self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans DVD collection, and the table from hell into my little car together. Jill had said to meet her at one o'clock. I intended to drop everything off at noon and be done with this madness.

But while my beloved and I were on the doorstep leaving everything I heard, “Jill? You’re home early,” through the door. Her mom opened it to peer at us in confusion.

“I was just bringing Jill’s stuff back!” I chirped in alarm.

With little tact and a lot of speed we left her with Jill’s collection of things and then I sped out of there like my tail was on fire. I handed my phone to my beloved as I zoomed away instructing them to block Jill’s number. I was free. The tabletross around my neck had been returned.

It was about a month after that when my beloved and I officially began dating exclusively. I had wrapped up all my messy dating threads and it was a relief to be in a relationship again. They went on a trip to Mexico shortly after we made it official.

So I knew they were out of town. But next morning I walked out to my car and beheld a lipstick kiss pressed to the drivers side window.

I was petrified. I had just dumped three girls at once and had an extremely messy back and forth with one of them. Did I have a stalker?!

Of the girls, Alice seemed like likeliest candidate, being of a stronger lipstick variety girl than Jill or Snakebites. We had ended things a bit stiffly, but still cordial. She just laughed when I asked if she knew anything about it. “Nope,” she said, “but good luck.”

I’d rather have walked over broken glass then text Jill, and I’d firmly ghosted Snakebites so I was scared to reopen communication to ask if she was stalking me. I had to drop it. But it haunted me, that lipstick kiss.

For months I was jumpy, wondering which of my spurned lovers had done it. And why. Was it a threat? A goodbye? I lay awake thinking about it, worrying about how everyone I’d dated knew where I lived, which car was mine.

Finally, nothing else happened and I moved on. The kiss would remain a mystery and I had to be content with that.

It was a year later when I finally started filling my mom in on my dating escapades that I finally got closure. She was hooting and laughing as I went over the table debacle. Then I paused and added, “And then this kiss showed up on my car.”

“Did you like it?”

“What? No! I’m pretty sure one of them was stalking me! Who else would leave a kiss on my car?”

My mom started bellowing with laughter. “I did!” She wheezed.

Apparently. My mother had been driving by my place. And decided that a cute little gesture would be to leave me a kiss. And then decided to never mention it to me even though she’s never done anything like that previously.

“It scared the crap out of me!” I yelled while she collapsed with helpless laughter. “I thought I had a stalker! How could I possibly have known that was you?!”

“How could I have known you’d just broken up with three girls at once?” She wheezed in rejoinder and like. Fair play.

So that’s how my mom convinced me I had a stalker and I got out of buying a $500 table.

[papercutsunset]

fucking nerd.

[cherry-leclerc]

fucked-up little thrill ☆ cl16

genre: pwp but also porn with plot (the best of both worlds!), humor, she truly is a maneater in disguiseee

word count: 8.3K

There’s a difference between warning and danger - you happen to be both. Though, Charles only sees the green light, go. Well, we can all imagine how this will already go.

nsfw warnings under the cut!

18+...oral (m and f receiving), fingering, handjob, penetrative sex, riding, slight cry, unprotected sex

inspired by this and this !

“She’ll mess with your head, man. You’re going to wish she had never looked your way.” 

“I told my mom about her. Crap, I bought her an engagement ring after a few days of knowing her.”

“Four words: Get. The. Fuck. Out.”

“Do you know how fucked in the head you have to be in order to willingly go after her? Fucking pathetic. Sure, I did the same, but hear me out-”

Despite the warnings, he didn’t pay them any attention. He thought he was going crazy for sure when he saw two guys on their knees, begging:  Run, just do it. And whatever you do, don’t look back.

Charles wasn’t even listening. 

-

The nights were beginning to get warmer, yet there was still a slight breeze. Spring was rolling in. What an innocent season to meet the wildest card Charles has ever dealt. 

“...then she laughed so hard that, Jesus Mary and Joseph, my heart went bananas! Y’know what I did next? I asked her, ‘You want a slice?’ I meant the tiramisu, guys! She thought I was talking about myself! T’was the most embarrassing thing. Made me look like a bloody narcissist.” Lando whined as he leaned onto the table to hide his face.

George snorts. “Ah don’t worry mate, I would gladly take a slice.” Lando groans, further rubbing his forehead onto the table. So much so, that it began to squeak.

“Alright, calm down before you shed your skin off. It wasn’t that bad.” Alex voices, as he pops a curly fry into his mouth. 

“Easy for you to say! You basically have the person you’re going to get married to! You’re safe.” The Brit pouts. He then lifts his head up and wipes away a single tear. Everyone explodes into laughter.

“Muppet, c’mon we were kidding! Weren’t we just fooling around, Charles?” Carlos wiggles his eyebrows at the Monegasque. Charles rolled his eyes playfully.

“Yes, of course we were joking,” he starts. Lando looks up, seemingly feeling better as everyone began to agree. We were just playing around!

“Then again, how did you even fall for a girl like that?” Charles finishes his sentence. 

“Argh. You don’t get itttt,” Lando wails in defeat. “When you meet a girl like that, you don’t question it. You just thank God for sending her your way and then BAM! She just walks out of your life.”

Hm - Charles thinks to himself as he takes a sip of Martini - naive, naive little Lando. 

-

Charles met you that same night he was out for dinner with the boys. He was waiting for his car from the valet; shooting Joris a quick text.

"Sorry," he overhears a soft voice, but still didn’t pay much attention.

"Sorry? You’re sorry? We both know goddamn well that you’re sorry about nothing. Nada. Zeeerrrooo," a man's voice angrily shouts back, voice slurring. 

Charles turns and sees a man running his hands through his blonde hair, walking back and forth in despair. Then, his eyes move to find you.

Standing tall in the tightest, shortest, black dress he's ever seen. So, the little black dress truly does exist. Glowy skin shining through from the lights decorating the outside of the restaurant. Your legs appear miles long, feet paired with your nicest set of heels, Joli Queen Glitter. Red fucking bottoms. Christian Louboutin at its finest. Rich jewelry sits on your wrists, fingers, and neck. 

Even with all that in the way, all he notices is just how drop-dead gorgeous you are. Suddenly, his fingers get clammy. What the hell? His jaw was clenched. Literally, why? His pants were growing tight because oh God he was already har- Alright, now that’s just crazy, Charles. Get it together.

“Yes. Whether you believe me or not, I’m sorry. Maybe you just shouldn’t have set high expectations,” you spoke, looking down.

“Are you being fucking serious right now? You’re smiling? You think this is funny! Oh God, what the fuck is wrong with you, you crazyyyy bitch!” The man continues, sharply pointing his finger at you accusingly. He genuinely looks like he’s about to start crying for his mommy.

“Okay mate, I think that’s enough. Why don’t I call you a cab?” Charles speaks up from where he’s standing. You and the mysterious guy turn to look at him. 

You shoot a smile as the man's eye starts twitching.

“Oh great! Great, great, great,” the man chants. “What an idiotic thing to believe that you hadn't gotten rid of me already! How could I not see it coming?” He drops to his knees and starts rocking back and forth. “On my dead hamster's birthday!” Levi, Charles later finds out, cries out to the sky. “Couldn’t this have happened any other day?” Charles cringes. “Call me that shitty ass cab, dude.”

So, you stand close by as Charles helps plop Levi inside with the help of the cab driver. They buckle him up and off they go. 

Not before Levi pokes his out the window. “I swear I’m not being bitter when I tell you to fucking save yourself!”

Both of you are left there standing quietly. You pout your red lips as you pull out your phone to call a cab for yourself. 

“Need a lift?”

-

Glancing around silently, you sneak a look at Charles. Handsome, you ponder, just a tiny bit. Outrageous lie. You quickly scold yourself for being so untruthful. This man was the most beautiful kind you’ve seen in your entire life. 

“Take it that was your boyfriend back there?” He taps his fingers against the wheel.

“Mmm. Hardly. No, he isn’t - wasn’t - my boyfriend by any means. Some guys just instantly assume stuff over any girl that pays them any ounce of attention.” You lazily trace shapes onto your thigh. You tug your dress down a bit, licking your lips. “Thanks for helping me out back there. It was really sweet.”

He notices the way you never look up from your lap as you’re speaking. It’s kind of endearing, just how soft you can be. “Don’t mention it…it was…no problem.”

He walks you from his car to your house. It's small, pastel yellow with a mailbox that reads; No more love letters. Seriously. “Cute,” he comments. You blush.

“Oh, that. Sorry, I live with my two best friends and they wrote that as a joke,” you ramble as you click your heel shyly. “They said it would help out with my, and I quote, ‘secret admirers.’” You let out a tired laugh as you finally build up the courage to look at the man standing right in front of you.

“To be honest, that makes sense.” He tilts his head a bit, analyzing your eyes. “Beautiful girls should receive beautiful letters.”

Tongue tied, you stare back with a pleased smile. 

“This is so unlike me, but would you like to go out some time?”

Easiest question ever asked.

-

A few nights later, he finally decides it would be a good day to take you out to dinner. Testing went well and the car was finally on the right track. He took this as a good omen.

“How long have you lived in Italy now?” you quiz, as you bring your Shirley Temple closer to your lips.

“Oh, um, for quite a while now. I mean it’s really only for work. I go home any chance I get.”

“Sweet. Where are you from?”

“Monaco.”

Your eyes grow wide with excitement. “Really! Monaco is so beautiful!” Your childlike squeal makes him smile brightly.

“Have you ever been?” You sadly shake your head, hair bouncing back and forth. Soft floral fills the air.

“Nope, but I wish to one day. I just know I’ll love it so much…” You trail off. “It’s just that growing up my favorite movie was Monte Carlo. Would beg my mom to play it any chance I could.” Maroon coats your cheekbones. He furrows his dark brows in confusion.

“Monte Carlo? You know, starring Selena Gomez?” His soft features pinch together. “...Leighton Meester? Katie Cassidy?” You desperatelyspit your words, trying to assist. He continues shaking his head. Never heard of it.

Your mood grows sulky as you pout. Leaning back, you finally take a sip of your drink. Oh, well now I really want something stronger than this.

“I would love to watch it some time though!” Charles tries as his voice cracks. He winces.

“Sure!” Though, you're not looking at him anymore. Your eyes are trained behind him. He’s about to turn around and ask if you’re fine, when you finally speak up. “I think I’ll go to the bar for another drink. Be right back!” He huffs. 

You weren’t back for almost too long. Finally, deciding to go look for you, he stands and takes long strides all around the dark restaurant. When he finds you he sees you’re not alone. 

A man in an all black suit seems to be your new company. You giggle as he appears to slide some type of business card to you. Just as you're about to grab it Charles strolls over to you both.

“Is your drink finally ready?” he asks as he wraps a protective arm around your waist. You flinch. You hadn’t even seen him walk over.

“Charles!” you shriek, as you crumble the piece of paper into the palm of your hard, hurriedly. You pray that he hadn’t noticed, but he had. Something inside of him told him not to ask. “I was actually on my way back. Did you need anything? A drink?” you ask, furrowing your brows attentively. 

“No, thank you, amour,” Charles warmly replies, looking into your glossy eyes. You truly were the best thing he’s ever laid eyes on.

“My apologies for getting in the way.” The man extends his hand out to Charles. “Aiden Quinn, pleasure to meet you.”

Charles may be upset that Aiden ruined his date, but he wasn’t keen on being rude, so begrudgingly, he shook his hand. “Charles Leclerc.” See, normally Charles isn’t the type to throw his name out like that expectantly, but he felt as if he had a point to make. He did, though. I was here first. 

The man grins ear to ear, nodding. “Yes, that’s where I know you from. I knew you looked familiar. Formula 1 driver, right? Ferrari?” He points with a knowing smile. 

“Scuderia’s number one driver, yes.” His grip around your waist stays secure. Meanwhile, your eyes are open to their fullest. Surprisingly, you had no idea. 

“Certainly. I’m one of the team's ambassadors, actually,” Aiden challenges. Charles clenches his jaw. “When you have million dollar businesses all around the world, you try to find a place to help. Ferrari really needs it at the moment.” You’re equally as shocked with Aiden as you are with Charles.

“Well then, I’ll make sure to dedicate my next podium to you I suppose." You shift uncomfortably. This reminds him you’re there. With him. Ha! Take that, Quinn! “Anyhow, I would love to chit chat with fellow fans, but I must say we have to get going.” He holds your hand firmly as he leads you out.

“Goodbye, Aiden!” you beam as you depart ways. 

-

“Formula 1 driver now, is it?” you curiously ask as you look over where he has one hand over the steering wheel and running the other calmly through his hair. 

“Thought you knew.”

“I had no clue! Zip!” you shriek as fling your arms through the air. He laughs as he pulls into an abandoned parking lot. 

“In the mood for something sweet?”

-

“Grazie mille,” the Monegasque says as he's handed cones of freshly made gelato. Smiling, he makes his way back to you. Hands you per requested raspberry, as he keeps his lemon one. 

“Molto gentile.” You inspect and nod your head in approval. Just hearing your tongue curl in Italian has him swooning. You take a lick and release a soft moan. “So sweet. Best I’ve ever had,” you declare as you continue enjoying your treat innocently.

Charles gulps, trying to cool down. “I told you it was the best.” He shoots a wink over to Luca, the owner, for keeping the shop open for a few more minutes. 

“You scared me a bit back there.”

“Pfft. With that Aiden guy…I’m sorry about that–”

“God no. Honestly, I completely forgot about that,” you mutter. “I meant with that whole, ‘In the mood for something sweet?’. Thought you were like the rest.”

The 25 year old keeps quiet for a minute. He gathers his thoughts before settling with, “I promise I’m not.”

“Keeping my fingers crossed you aren’t.” You look around with twinkling eyes. “You know, a date I once had asked me-”

You want a slice?

No.

“It shocked me how straight forward he was being. It wasn’t even our second date! I barely even knew the guy.” You frown at the memory. “Then he blamed it on the tiramisu.”

I meant the tiramisu, guys!

God no. 

“Never saw him again,” you finish as you finally focus back on him. A pale Charles is all you find.

“Woah, are you okay?” 

“Yes! I’m so good! You look lovely! Did I mention it already cause if I didn’t then call me the worst date ever!” He begins nervously laughing. His gelato dripping all over his arm.

“I think you did.” You smile as you hand him a few napkins. He returns the gesture, thanking you. “And don’t worry about it, leave that spot for Lando. Now he might take the crown.”

Charles let out a groan.

-

Charles went back and forth deciding whether he should reach out to you. He liked you. A lot. Nonetheless, he was hesitating because he just couldn’t do something like that to Lando. The Brit was as bummed out as one could get. So, it's settled. Bye bye baby.

“Of course. Tonight at 8,” your voice confirms on the other side of the line. Charles celebrates with a quick dance.

“See you then.”

-

He decides today that he wants to switch things up. Do something that would make him stand out from anyone that came before him. 

“Monaco?” Leaning on the hood of Charles' car, you feel you have to be dreaming. He nods his head lively.

“I could show you around, y’know be your personal tour guide.”

“You should have warned me! I don’t have anything ready!” you yelp as you hold your hands over your heart, frantically. He would be more worried if it weren’t for you smiling like the Cheshire Cat.

“We still have time. Come on, I’ll help you pack.”

-

When you make it to Monaco you’re greeted by a young guy wearing glasses, driving a Ferrari Pista. Charles and him fit in a quick embrace before they turn their attention back to you.

“Ah yes, this is Joris. He’s one of my closest friends,” Charles states as you warmly reach for a handshake. 

Reciprocating, Joris says, “Very nice to meet you.” You smile, returning the greeting. “Must say, you are just as beautiful as Cha had mentioned, if not more.” You blush as Charles clears his throat awkwardly.

“D'accord, mec. Pas besoin de le dire au monde entier,” Charles mutters. “Thank you for picking us up.” Joris nods, carrying your luggages. You share a quick goodbye before he finally makes his way to another car. “That’s also one of my very good friends, Marta.” You smile and wave as they drive off. 

Monaco definitely met your expectations. Everything just captivated your attention so much that you wouldn’t be surprised if you started to drool. 

“Holy shit. Your home is absolutely stunning!” you gasp. He wheels your bags in as he exhales.

“Merci. Make yourself at home.”

-

Thankfully, the flight was quick so you both have plenty of energy to go out for a late night snack. He takes you to his; Favorite place in the world! You’ll see.

A little stand sits in the corner of the street. 

“Lou makes one of the best crepes. Trust me, I’ve been a loyal customer since my school days.”

A little old lady is attending to customers, but stops as soon as she spots Charles. “Charlie! Chérie, je ne savais pas que tu étais de retour!” She makes her way around to hug him.

“Des projets de dernière minute, mais j'ai juste envie de manger une de tes incroyables crêpes,” he replies, as they pull away.

“And who is this pretty girl?” she questions as she looks at you, standing there patiently.

“Oop, hello. I’m a friend of Charles.” Lou smiles teasingly.

“Charlie, tu es là pour me dire que tu vas te marier?” Lou suddenly looks over the moon.

“Non!” he quickly shouts, so suddenly, you and Lou both jump a bit. Tight lipped, he apologizes.

“Like she said, we’re just friends."

-

The next morning after breakfast he recommends you bring something you can swim with. Skipping your way to his room, which he is kindly sacrificing for you, you roam through your luggage until you find a baby blue bikini. 

“You don’t get sea sick by any means, right?” He looks over at you with scrunched brows underneath a pair of glossy black Ray Bans. You shake your head.

“Great.”

You make your way to a tiny boat before he helps you settle in. You grab his hand softly as you step into it. A single touch of electricity seems to link your fingertips. It catches you both so off guard that he lets go of you so swiftly, you don’t even notice as you plunge into the water.

You let out a quick yelp before you go underwater and his hands fly to his head in embarrassment. You resurface with wet hair covering your face.

“Oh my God, I am so sorry!” he apologizes before extending his arm out for you to grab. Pushing your hair out of your face, you giggle. 

“It’s okay, I got it.”

Once you independently get on the boat, he unties the rope off the deck and takes a seat himself to drive you both to the unknown destination.

“Pretty please, can I know now where we’re going?” you squeal with puppy eyes. 

Lord help me, he thinks before replying. “We’re going to a little island I love. Îles de Lérins.” You look ahead, nodding patiently. “It’s beautiful, you’ll see.”

-

When you arrive it’s easy to understand that there doesn’t seem to be that many people. You basically have the place to yourselves.

He helps you off, not dropping you this time. There’s a small trail you both begin to take. It’s something peaceful, the moment you’re in. You almost wish to fit it into a snow globe. 

“My parents would always bring my brothers and I here all the time during summer when we were younger,” Charles confesses.

“You have brothers?” 

He turns to look at you, then continues ahead. “Yes. Two.” He kicks a rock out of his way, but something you didn’t know was just how clumsy this man child could be.

“Ouch!” you groan in pain as your hand flies up to your nose.

“Jesus! What’s wrong with me today? Are you okay? I’m so sorry!” He runs to you all panicky now.

You take it back. Break the goddamn snow globe.

You try tilting your head back to ease the blood pouring out your nose before he gently grips your face to gain your attention. You scrunch your eyes, sun suddenly blinding you. Quickly, he takes off his glasses and places them over your eyes. As you open them you notice he’s shirtless. He places his shirt on your nose to clean you up. You flinch a bit.

Instantly, you’re thankful for the sunglasses because wondering eyes were all you could give him. His lean muscles were just begging to be praised. 

You shake your head before taking the Puma shirt from him. “Thanks,” you mutter as you focus on a nearby tree. “Starting to think you might hate me or something.”

“Of course not... I could never hate you!” His voice cracks in nervousness. You snicker.

After a bit more wiping, you are as good as new. You both decide to take a dip while the water feels good. You strip from your Levi shorts and t-shirt. Dipping a toe to test the temperature, you shoot him two thumbs up. 

The ocean feels so fresh and silky against your skin. You can’t seem to remember the last time you’ve enjoyed someone’s company like this, even if they almost ruled you to the ends of Earth. Two fingers press against your neck. You spring one eye open and you see Charles biting down on his thumb. He relaxes.

“Sorry, I thought you crossed the line to the afterlife.”

You tread water to stretch your legs out. “I’m fine.”

He takes this time to note things he hadn’t paid attention to before. Like how your lashes pin against your skin since they’re wet. Or how a tiny bit of freckles are sprinkled on your nose. He curses himself for not having seen it any sooner. Pretty was an understatement. You were extraordinary. 

A few hours later you guys are back at his house sharing a pizza. Pepperoni, you both loved a classic.

“There’s no bruise,” he points out almost proudly. You shoot a playful scowl. He walks over to the T.V. and clicks the remote. “Monte Carlo?”

He loved it, the way you said he would. He especially enjoyed watching how much you loved it. 

“This movie was too ahead of its time,” you confirm as you dig your feet under the blanket you had curled into. 

“Well at least Grace and Theo got their happily ever after,” he pronounces. You shoot an impressed look. “What? I was listening.” You crawl up next to him and pat his cheek. His dimples pop out from how hard he’s smiling. 

He can’t help it the moment he reaches to cradle your face to press your lips together. He can’t help but let a moan slip out when you finally kiss him back. 

Finally, he picks you up to adjust you on his lap, which you comfortably settle into. You feel him underneath you so clearly you can’t help but move your hips. He feels so good.

The heated moment continues as he wraps his hands around the curve of your ass. You pull away as your lips move down to his neck. He almost gasps the moment you lick down his throat. It doesn’t help that you’ve been keeping your hips in motion. 

He almost passes out the moment your lips move to his ear and ask, no, beg; Let me taste you, please. How could he ever deny such offer?

Making your way down to your knees, he adjusts himself on the couch. He thinks to himself that if he were standing he would’ve made a fool out of himself because just the sight of you in front of him has him choking on his own breath. You just look so pretty.

You tug his shorts down, along with his boxers, and bite down on your lip as you grab his cock, softly. He has to stop himself from jerking into your hand. Precum sprouting from his tip. You can’t wait as you take kitten licks. Fuck, he whimpers. The sound of his voice makes you squeeze your thighs together.

Wrapping your lips around him, your hands reach to balance yourself against his thighs. You moan at the feeling of having him inside your mouth, drooling all over his lap.

This itself, is too much for Charles and thinks he’ll barely even be able to survive as his head turns against the couch' pillow with closed lids. You start bobbing your head and one hand flings down to jerk off what you can’t reach. He groans at the feeling. 

You start off slow but suddenly start picking up your pace. He opens his eyes, dazed, to catch a glimpse of you on your knees and this sight is something he won’t be able to forget even if he tried. With glassy eyes, you look up at him. You make a show of releasing your lips from his cock as you lap your tongue along it. Before going back at it, you twirl your tongue a couple of times around his tip before giving it a quick suck, then deep throat him. 

He grits his teeth as if to help deal with any of this but when you start toying with yourself he lets out the loudest whine he’s ever produced. You look up smiling, grazing your teeth lightly along him and he hisses at the feeling. Proudly, you fit him back into your mouth. 

“God, your mouth feels so fucking good,” he manages to get out before you solely start jerking him off.

“What about my hands?” you seductively tease. The sounds coming from both your hands and his cock should be considered a sin itself. He groans as he looks back to make eye contact with you.

“Your hands too, baby.”

He knows he’s close the moment you twist your wrist perfectly. So so good. You know he’s close when he begins to twitch underneath your fingertips. 

“I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum,” he chants as you continue your dirty movements. He makes sure to look at you, focused, eyes drawn to his cock.

“Cum for me, Charles,” you coo as he finally bucks his hips into your hands and hot cum shoots all over your face. You wickedly smile as your lips reach his cock to continue swallowing the rest that is being released. He grabs you face to pull you off him and hauls you once again onto his lap. He’s about to kiss you before you pull away and point at the mess on your face. 

You wipe two fingers along your face and bring them to your mouth to clean them off. A pop is released when you let go. He shudders. 

This is the moment, Charles realizes, he’s so screwed.

-

When you make it back to Italy you realize that all you’ll have are a few fleeting moments together. With Charles going back to racing and you continuing your online classes, you’re both bound to be booked.

Though, Charles just isn’t ready to let you go. And a fucked up man will make fucked up choices when due.

So, he strings you along with him to the Miami GP. He realizes there’s a strong chance you might bump shoulders with Lando, but to be completely honest, he was past caring. He was completely smitten with you.

-

You wear your white summer dress as you are sprawled on his hotel bed. You’re a mess.

“Shit, shit, shit,” you whimper as Charles fingers slip in and out of you. He’s feverishly kissing down the side of your thighs, bites left in between. You groan in slight pain as you tug on his soft hair. This man has brought out the moon and stars, for you.

“C’mon baby, look at me,” he whispers as he paints you with hickeys in between your legs. Somewhere no one else will ever be able to catch a glimpse of. You nod your head as you look down to find him gripping your dress over your thighs, eating you out like a starved man. You shut your eyes as you release a few soft pants, the heels of your feet press deeper against his Ferrari polo.

“Open you’re eyes.”

You shake your head. You wish you could look at him, you really wanted to, but it’s just too much take in. You wanted to make this last.

But Charles was greedy. He wanted to taste you. He stops everything all at once. You let out a cry. Fuck him.

You bring your arms around his neck, loosely, as he kisses your shoulder. “Why’d you stop?”

“You weren’t looking at me.”

With all your strength you open your glittered eyelids. 

“That’s a good girl,” he coos as he picks you up and sits you at the edge of the bed. You look down at him confused as he gets on his knees in front of you.

“If you can’t look at me, then you’re going to have to look at yourself,” he directs as he begins to push your dress back up your waist. You lean against your elbows as you realize what other than Charles is in front of you.

A shiny glass mirror.

With a slightly open mouth you’re about to protest before Charles picks up right where he left off. He spits on your clit before rubbing it. You bite down on your bottom lip so hard, you draw blood. 

“Don’t tell me I have to get you to moan now?” Charles stares at you with furrowed brows. You shake your head no before he kisses your knee. “Good.”

He makes sure you look straight at your reflection before he curls his fingers inside of you. You mewl at the touch. Your legs beg to bring him closer.

He lets out a light chuckle before repeating his motion. With sleepy eyes, you stare at the way your legs rest against his shoulders. You had painted your nails bloody mary a few nights before, in support of him and his team. Your face all fucked up singly by Charles’ long fingers and delicate touch, red lipstick all over your mouth from how heavy your make out with Charles had been.

To him, you looked like an angel. 

You squeal as he presses his nose against your pussy. You grind against his face. He pulls away and you whine, looking at him desperately.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re okay,” he reassures you as he moves up to kiss your cheek and then your pouty lips. 

“Cha, please,” you beg hopelessly. He grins as he pushes your hair out of your face and runs his thumb across your lips trying to clean you up a bit.

You take a chance and wrap your lips around his finger, and you begin to suck. Expertly, you swirl your tongue. Eyes look back at him, almost challenging. He lets out a strained groan.

With all the willpower he has left, he removes his finger from your mouth. Nicely wet, he presses it back where you needed him the most.

“Thank you, baby, you shouldn’t have.” You cry out at the sudden size of his thumb now being inside of you. He switches out his thumb for his middle and ring finger. You throw your head back. All the back and forth almost has you blacking out a few times. Charles gives you a quick peck, fingers building speed, as he pulls your dress down a bit to release your plump tits.

Now he’s at a loss for words. Quickly, he regains his composure and starts sucking on your left nipple, legs squeezing around his waist as a reflex. One hand flies to the back of his head as one makes its way to cup his cheek adoringly.

He moans against you, sucking hard before moving his attention to your right nipple. The way you’re wailing against him has him painfully hard against his jeans.

“Yes, God yes right there, Charlie,” you let out as you grind against his hand. He detaches his lips from your chest as he smiles up at you. 

“I’m right here, baby. Cum for me, yeah?” You let out the most pornographic moan as you finish around his hand. Tears make their way down your cheeks. Cleans his fingers, he shuts his eyes satisfied, before he towers over your body, pressing kisses all over.

You giggle. “That tickles." The 25 year old’s heart doubles in size at the sound of your fucked out voice. 

“Why don’t we get you cleaned up before the race?”

-

The race results weren't the best Charles has had, that’s for sure. Head hung, he makes his way to his motorhome. There he finds you on the tiny little bed, curled up, watching the rest of the ongoing interviews. As soon as you notice him you jump up to your feet and walk to him.

It's almost as if you knew how down he was feeling when you wrap your arms around his waist and pressing your face against his chest. He instantly feels better as his arms swaddle over your shoulders, chin atop your pretty hair.

“You did good,” you mumble. You press a faint kiss on his suit before looking up.

���I fucked up. I got P7.”

You frown at him before holding his face between your soft palms. “P7 is good, what do you mean?” He just shakes his head. “You’ve never heard of seven being a lucky number?”

He scoffs, but not at you, never you. More at himself. “Lucky?”

You pull away and sit back on his bed. “Oh yeah, seven bring all the luck in the world!” you squeal, as you plop on the bed. He laughs lightly as he lies beside you.

“Guess I’ll just take your word for it.” He hums with his eyes closed.

You turn on your side as you try to memorize his face. Like the small mole that sits on the left side of his face that makes him even more handsome, if anyone asks for your opinion. You scold yourself for not having noticed it before. As if to fix things, you name it one of your favorite things about him.

“You should. Things will get better, you’ll see.”

For once, he really believes it.

-

You both are walking out of the Ferrari home when you're suddenly stopped by someone calling Charles’ name. 

“Hey, Charles! Great race man!” A familiar voice rings through the air before you both have a chance to turn around. Both you and Charles, unknowingly of one another, want to make a run for it.

“Thanks, Lando,” Charles replies as he prays he might not notice you. But a girl as beautiful as you can’t go forgotten.

“Holy shit it’s you!” Lando wails as he instantly recognizes you from dinner a few months ago. You cringe. What the chances?

“Hi,” you squeak as you hide behind Charles a bit. You had no idea Lando was a Formula 1 driver too. You ought to do your research better next time.

“Mate! This is the chick I was telling you about over dinner last time!” Lando says, eyes almost popping out of his face from the shock he’s in.

“You don’t sayyyy.” Charles tries to hide it, though inside he’s freaking out as if he’s broken every FIA rule in the book.

“Hey, I want to say sorry for that night, I should have been more clear,” Lando begins to spill his apologies, as all you can do is silently stand there, accepting them all.

“Of course. Long forgotten,” you comfort the Brit. He’s actually a pretty sweet guy. 

“Charles, I’ll wait for you outside, alright?” you utter as he nods. Once you walk out, he turns to Lando frantically.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that was the same girl you were upset about!” he tells him. Liar. “You must be mad at me and I get it-”

“Nope.”

Charles stares back, caught off guard by Lando’s response. 

“You’re not?” 

Lando rolls his eyes. “I’m not. I just hope you realize what she’s capable of.” He leans in closer to Charles’ ear and Charles leans in too, expectantly. “I’ve heard stories, man…”

Charles immediately pulls away. “Okay, we’re done here. Bye mate!”

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you!”

But Charles knew you better. He saw the way you looked at him. The way you felt. You were different. Fuck your following reputation.

“Ready?” 

-

When you got back from Miami, something had shifted. He couldn’t quite name the moment it had, but he was sure of it. He didn’t care though. He would put up with just about anything as long as that meant having you around.

“And then he told me to test the car again, said it was fixed. Fixed my ass!” Charles tells you over FaceTime. You were sitting in your bedroom, painting nonsense on a canvas. You wore some old overalls with loose space buns. Strands of hair would hit the paint from how messy it was.

“No way,” you say, not looking up. Charles smiles fondly.

“You look lovely by the way.” Though, you don’t seem to catch his affirmation for you. Your eyes are focused on something out of frame, in front of you. A quick smirk appears on your face but slips so fast that he almost begins to think he’s imagined it.

“Thank you, Charles,” you reply with a much bigger smile now. “Hey, how about I meet you at your house at 9? I’ll cook you a nice meal, promise.”

Like always, he knows he shouldn’t ask and also knows he can’t say no to you.

“I’ll be waiting.”

-

That night when you step into his house he notices things he wishes weren’t there. Like how your hair was a tad bit messy or how there were light bruises on your neck. He knows those didn’t come from him. He’d always been mindful to mark you in places no one else could admire, just him. Something bugs him knowing someone has seen them already.

“I’m so sorry I’m late." You rush in with bags from the nearby market, the one just around the corner from his flat.

“No worries. So, what will we be cooking, my little chef?”

That night you seem so infatuated by him, he truly thinks this all was his imagination. Maybe the wind blew your hair on your way here; he should have offered to pick you up. Maybe he forgot he had also marked your neck; he’ll make sure to be more careful next time.

He wraps his arms around your waist as you cut pieces of basil. Giggling, you turn around to peck his lips. Craving more from you, he lifts you up onto the kitchen island. He stands in between your legs as you stare up at him, ever a vixen.

As you lock lips, he picks you up, you yelp all giddy. He makes his way over to his bedroom, your lips lingering on his neck, he almost drops you from how good it feels.

“Careful, don’t need another wack in the face,” you mumble from his neck, light spirited. He rolls his eyes at your comment, but yeah, he should probably focus. 

Finally reaching his room, he kicks the door open so hard, it flies and instantly makes a hole through the wall. You gasp as he groans.

“Fuck it, it’s fine,” he murmurs as he takes you to his bed where he drops you. You giggle as your hair covers your face, he makes his way to hover over you and brush it away.

“You know I would do anything for you?” he asks, tenderness lacing his voice.

You stare back at him with bright and eager eyes. “Yeah. I know.”

He smiles as he leans down to kiss you and you instantly melt into the mattress beneath you. He kisses you so fast, so hot, that it has you feeling lightheaded. I’ve been kissed before but never, ever, like this, you think as he slips his tongue as a quick trick. You moan with pleasure. He smiles into the kiss. 

He picks his head up to get a good look at the angel the universe had ever so nicely sent his way. He caresses you gingerly. “Are you sure, chérie?”

You nod up and down eagerly, ready for more he’s willing to give. You are so desperate you would gladly take anything as long as it's from him. A flash of sadness strikes your face before it’s replaced with a warm smile. 

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to,” he comforts you as he begins to take a step back. You quickly hold onto his veiny arm. 

“I want to,” you confirm. You bring him back to you as you kiss him for the millionth time that night. Even that would never be enough. 

His hands make their way to slip your dress off. Once you're left in your matching lingerie, you push him on his back and straddle him.

“Holy shit,” he nervously laughs as you started to unbutton his linen shirt. He pulls his arm out as you sloppily brush your lips down his smooth chest, fingers tracing his firm abs. Then, as you’re about to pull his pants down, he grabs your hands firmly. You glance at him, confusion written all over your face.

“Ladies first,” he teases. You roll your eyes, but still slip out a quick, okay, before settling under him once again. He kisses down your neck gently as you hum out, finding peace with his lips hovering your body. Every new kiss he places on your soft skin makes you feel thousands of butterflies. You’d never experienced something like this before, you’ve never felt so flawless. 

Clumsy fingers roam your back as he unclips your bra then strips you from your panties. Seeing you completely bare has his dumbstruck. This is something he could easily get used to. 

His hands make their way to squeeze your tits, your head digs deeper into the mattress as you release a soft whimpers. Charles grows harder by the second, already getting rid of the rest of his clothes as quickly as he can.

He tugs you closer to him by your legs. A laugh rolls past your lips. Resting both arms by either side of your head, he pushes into you. Synchronously, you both let out a moan. You dig your nails into his shoulder as he grips onto the sheets. 

You feel so tight around him that it takes all of him not to lose control. You throw your arm over your face, face scrunched.

Putting his feelings aside, Charles leans down and plants a kiss on your arm. “C’mon baby, not again. Look at me.”

“I can’t…,” you cry out weakly, “...too big.”

“You just have to adjust,” he reassures you as he begins to move in and out of you. Your arms fly up to his neck and you grab on tight, as if he’s keeping you ashore. You moan loudly.

“That’s it, baby,” he whispers as he thrusts deep inside of you. Your velvety walls feel like home to him and he never wants to leave. 

You squirm when his cock hits your sweet spot. You yell into the nothingness and your grip on his hair tightens so much, he groans at the sensation. His hips pick up speed, and suddenly, he’s kissing you again. You whine into his lips, needy for more. Harder. 

As if he could read your mind, that's exactly what he does. Your lips form a silent O as you stare at him with eyebrows drawn together. He just feel so fucking good.

“Fuck baby,” he groans, voice deep. You shiver at the sound. “God, you feel so good, you’re doing so good,” he praises you as he now looks into your eyes. You wail in response, too fucked up to form any kind of sentence.

“I love you so much,” he announces so suddenly, you almost push him away. He keeps moving rapidly as he makes out with you eagerly.

As you kiss him back you realize something scary; you love Charles Leclerc. You think you’ve loved him for a while now, but having never been in love, you didn’t seem to notice the feeling. But you do now.

“I love you, too,” you murmur against his lips. When he pulls away you notice you’ve never seen him smile so big. You like being the reason behind it.

He immediately pounds into you harder, not holding back anymore and you’re both a mess. You moan so loud, you’re almost embarrassed but Charles seems to love it.

“If you love me,” he pants, “then tell me his name.”

He continues normally, but you swear you feel your heart stop. There’s no way.

“What are you talking about?” you manage to spit out, but the way he’s handling your body has you seeing stars.

“Please,” a desperate look flashes across his face, “just tell me his name.” His watch covered hand makes its way to your clit and he pushes his finger against it. God, his fingers are so-

“There’s no one.” Liar. “There’s just you.”

With that, you flip him over so now you’re on top of him. Hastily, you start to ride him, making sure to move your hips just the way he likes it. His head falls back against the bed frame as his fingers dig into your hips. You bite your swollen lips in slight pain, but also, just by looking at his current state.

Cheeks slightly pink with sweaty hair covering his face. Long disheveled hair that you pressed him not to trim quite yet. What a sight for sore eyes.

“Please,” he chokes out, “just tell me his name and I swear I’ll never bring it up again.” He opens his eyes to look up at you. His voice hitches when he sees you hopping on his dick, tits bouncing up and down. You throw your head back and circle your hips much harder.

“Fuck.” Charles gasps as he reaches up to attach his lips to your chest. He licks before softly biting down against your bud. You exhale sharply. He then lays back and holds onto your hips harder before helping you move on top of him. Wrapped around him, the motion between both of you picks up so fast you start shaking your head no.

“Yes, amour, say it. Please just tell me before I lose my fucking mind,” he grunts as he stares down at your juices as they make the filthiest sound against his own. 

“I swear Charles, I promise, that I have never loved anyone the way I do you,” you confess as you sink your nails against his chest, red marks instantly mapping themselves down.

“Beautiful fucking liar.” Charles smirks as he moves his fingers against your clit rapidly. With that, your walls clench around him as you cum so hard around him he can’t help but follow. You moan loudly as you fall against his chest as he groans lowly. 

Trying to even your breathing, you grab onto his hand. Instantly, he brings it up against his lips. Just the touch of his makes you want to ride him until you can’t no more. 

You meant what you said that night. Though you both should have known better. Being naive can’t always last forever.

-

“Then she left a note saying it’s best we just remain friends,” Charles reveals a few nights later over dinner. Everyone shares glances of empathy to the distraught Monegasque. Even Lando.

“It’s alright man, you’ll be over her before you know it,” Lando states as he shares a knowing smile. Charles bites down on his tongue knowing all this pent of anger wasn’t towards Lando. Not even for you. 

He would like to say that he learned his lesson and that he should have listened to everyone, all the warning signs that glowed above his head. But he knows damn well he would do it all over again if given the chance. He would say, do anything, to change your mind. To make you stay, but people like you never settled. 

Moping, Charles changes the topic as he begins asking how everyone’s break was. He didn’t really care, but he tried to pretend. 

Out of breath, Oscar rushes over to the table. “Sorry I’m late,” he says as he sits down in between Lando and Charles.

“No worries, mate, Charles was just filling us in on his expired love life,” Daniel fills in, nonchalantly. Charles immediately shoots a dry frown. Daniel shares an apologetic shrug.

“Oh. That sucks man,” the young Australian replies as he gulps down some water. “Speaking of love lives, you guys won’t believe it! I just met the prettiest girl of my entire life just now outside of the restaurant!”

[mnemosyne-nyx]

✨ Bruce Wayne Headcanons that haunt me but I refuse to elaborate on even if they're utterly wrong ✨

1. Bruce can cook, but only when he's 100% focused. If there is anything going on around him like a feral child or he's going over some case in his head then something's catching fire.

2. He definitely was a theatre kid for the shortest span when a teenager. Have you met this man? Are you telling me he's never engaged in a single drama piece in his life? He was raised by literal-Shakespeare-actor Alfred pennyworth? My man Bruce can ACT. All his personas rely on it. So does his undercover work. I like to think he was in a amateur Shakespeare production one time just to surprise and make Alfred happy.

3. Tying in with the acting - Bruce is a master of disguise. With all the languages he speaks, identity shenanigans, cases that need inside info. Bruce can just morph into another person. But his abilities in disguise also means he can mimic people's mannerisms and accents easily. The idea of Bruce confusing the shit out of Clark by just perfectly emulating his country accent and then pretending nothing happened tickles me very much.

4. This idiot tilts his head ever so slightly like a confused dog when being bamboozled. Only People who know him closely recognise this but it's such a minute movement it's easy to miss. Any confusing story, perplexing stupidity or a little sprinkle of disbelief - boom head tilt. God help you if you get the head tilt and batglare combined. You've said the most ungodly, sinful, idiotic, offensive, seizure-inducing idea known to man.

5. He and Diana 100% gossip in other languages when on the watchtower . Both are polylinguals. It's also a learning space. Diana 100% teaches him Ancient Greek, Latin and forgotten languages while Bruce 100% teaches her alien dialects he's mastered.

6. My guy can sing. Ever since that silly lil' justice league episode I can't get this silly lil' headcanon out my head and it makes my lil' toesies curl. Gotham, though a hell scape, is a melting pot of culture and music. Opera, jazz, blues but also a strong underground Punk and techno scene. You'd be hard pressed to avoid music in Gotham. My guy just learned to sing through osmosis. Only a small handful of people know he can sing, though none have admitted that to Bruce.

7. Since this man is a sponge of knowledge, he just drops some of the most jaw-dropping, disturbing and unprompted facts then refuses to elaborate. Oliver Queen is just enjoying his ham sandwich only for "You know studies about cannibals say that human meat tastes very similar to pork." and Oliver is just !?!?!?!!?. The batfam are watching The Matrix and Bruce suddenly "The codes in this film are actually just Sushi recipes." and everyone does a perfect slow swivel to face this engima of a man.

Thank you for attending my tedtalk :)

[temnurus]

Draco Falls First Fic Recs

I made this rec list when someone in a server asked for fics in which Draco falls in love with Harry first. I love pining, & this scenario is the perfect setup for it. As a result, I had rather a lot to choose from, but here are ten that made the cut this time.

The Unbearable Burden of Caring & it's sequel Sins and Scars and Shattered Things by Tessa Crowley (E, 22,189)

Thoughts: These fics both ruined me. They were so damn good that I could have wept from the sheer beauty of the prose alone. I swear I must've spent half of them clutching a tissue in anticipation of breaking into ugly sobs every five minutes. They were romantic & beautifully poignant; even the smut was so emotionally charged that I was left spellbound. I highly, highly recommend them both.

you've got the antidote for me by Kandakicksass (E, 20,730)

Thoughts: My heart was breaking for Draco before I even got through the summary. This soulmate fic is recced a lot & with good reason. It's still one of my favorites, & I reread it quite often.

Dragon Heartstrings by JET_Playin (E, 23,825)

Thoughts: Admittedly I'm a sucker for soulmate fics, so here's another for you. I liked how the author covered Draco's experience with seeing the red strings that indicated soulmate bonds throughout the years, briefly touching on his early childhood & skipping through his years at Hogwarts before settling into the meat of the story during his & Harry's eighth year at school. This is another one that I've reread several times because I just enjoy it so much each time.

Beating Out of Time by Moss_Man_Writes (E, 73,574)

Thoughts: I was sucked in from the very beginning, & I loved Draco's POV the most. The pining on Draco's part was perfect, & watching Harry fall in love with him was just enchanting.

The Butterfly Kiss by triggerlil (T, 1,998)

Thoughts: This is the shortest of all my recs, but it's by no means less engaging. The ethereal atmosphere of the whole thing left me breathless. Draco as a butterfly was something I'd never seen before, & even though I knew fairies were sometimes viewed as butterflies by unsuspecting mortals, I never would've thought of it as a premise. It was such a gorgeous soulmate AU (couldn't help myself). Draco's pining for Harry throughout was heart-achingly beautiful, too.

The Shape of the World by bixgirl1 (E, 48,276)

Thoughts: Memory loss fics often guarantee a healthy dose of angst, & this is no exception. Harry being the one afflicted did provide the perfect setup for Draco to fall for him first, though. He was probably already a bit in love with him before he ran back into him, to be honest, haha. This is by my favorite Drarry author, & rarely is there ever a time one of her fics doesn't make it onto a rec list of mine.

The Light More Beautiful by firethesound (E, 81,255)

Thoughts: Draco was so clever & creative in this, & the way he felt about Harry took my breath away. He appreciated the exact things about him that make me love Harry so much as a character, & it was probably my favorite thing about this fic. The pining was achingly lovely, the banter & teasing were fun, & the smut was scorching hot. firethesound is one of the most popular Drarry authors to date, & this is probably my favorite fic of hers.

The Lily Spell by pickledghost (E, 86,512)

Thoughts: Okay, fair warning, this is an Omegaverse fic & the author is up front about the fact that Draco's characterization isn't standard to canon or even most of fanon. He was so sweet that I just couldn't get enough of him. It's also an AU in which there was no second war with Voldemort, & I think it had a very believable interpretation of how Harry might've turned out under those circumstances. He was still very much himself at his core, just more confident & self-assured, in my opinion. The slow burn was so well done that I didn't even notice the passage of time while I was glued to the story. It hooked me in & kept me invested from start to finish.

Pop Up Pals by bambimoss (E, 62,447)

Thoughts: I cannot believe I almost forgot to add this fic. I read it twice in a row. That's how much I enjoyed the story. Draco being so lonely broke my fucking heart. Seriously, I think someone would have to be a sociopath if they couldn't empathize with Draco's experiences here. Surprisingly, I laughed a lot at this, & I also cried like a baby at one point. The characterizations were amazing, & the fic was jam-packed with emotion. It was absolutely stunning, & nothing has managed to knock it off of my top ten favorite Drarry fics list despite some very close contenders since the first time I read it.

[vivalas-vega]

new perspectives // part ten // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

howdy !! I think this is the shortest chapter in this series yet, but kind of a heavy one nonetheless. I'm getting back into the swing of writing and am hoping to bring this series to it's close within the next 3-5 parts! as always, please let me know what you think!

new perspectives // part ten // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

prologue - one - two - three - four - five - six - seven - eight - nine

add yourself to my taglist

word count: 2.5k

warnings: we are diving into jupiter's deployment so mentions of warzones and guns but nothing too graphic or in depth

The Hard Deck was thrumming just as it always was on a Friday night but lately Jake had lost the desire for after-work hangouts at the bar… darts and pool didn’t feel the same anymore, and he was having a hard time enjoying anything because he knew wherever you were you weren’t having fun. He tried to tell himself that maybe in the quiet moments, when the sky wasn’t falling and people weren’t relying on you to save their life, you and your team were able to unwind. Maybe kick around a soccer ball or play card games to pass the time and provide some sense of normalcy but he knew even if that was the case it didn’t change anything. You were in a warzone, and he was here at the bar. 

But, that didn’t stop him from trying. Your deployment was hard on everyone, not just him, and he knew that if he pulled away it would only make your friends feel it more deeply, he was the only tether to you and he also knew he needed to be here. If he wasn’t he’d be at home staring off into space and making himself sick with worry. It was better for him to be preoccupied, which was why he had taken on more responsibility at Top Gun, and why he was currently engaged in a game of darts with Coyote, trying to distract himself from the fact that he hadn’t heard from you in a month.

You two had discussed this going into it, and he knew communication would be infrequent. You had real life or death problems on your hands day in and day out, in a foreign country in the middle of an active warzone. Just because you didn’t call, or didn’t answer any of his, didn’t mean that something had happened to you, or that you didn’t want to. It just meant you were doing your job, and trying to stay safe in the process… but knowing that didn’t make it any easier of a pill to swallow. 

He also knew there was an order, and it wasn’t his turn. You two were no strangers to infrequent communication and you were adamant that your marriage could handle it. His turn had been first, and then your parents, and the next time you had the opportunity to call home it would be Rooster’s. He wasn’t angry about that, not at all… Rooster had quickly become your closest friend and confidant outside of him and he knew that you missed him just as much as everyone else, that in your darkest moments he would be one of the people you needed to see. He was grateful for it, to know that you had multiple people in your life you loved so deeply, trusted so implicitly… but that didn’t make it fun to know that the next time someone heard from you it would be the goofy guy across the bar laughing loudly with his arm slung around his new girlfriend’s waist and not him, that the next time he got an update on you it would come from him. 

He was endlessly proud of you, for how strong you had been and how devoted you were to your life’s calling. Putting yourself into such imminent danger to help others was just about the most you think he could think of, and he knew you could handle yourself. When you left you were off to a very condensed boot camp where you learned basic survival skills outside of medicine, you received a crash course in all the things you would need to know, and received training if god forbid you ever found yourself in the position of needing to defend yourself. He knew you were well equipped to take care of yourself, but he also knew that you likely had seen things and done things that would leave a lasting mark… but that was all he knew.

That was the hardest part for him… not knowing what you were going through. Even in your spottiest bouts of communication over the course of school and deployments he always knew what was going on with you, and his worst case scenarios he’d concoct when he worried were you stressing yourself into exhaustion. Now, his worst case scenarios were something he couldn’t even dare to verbalize, something if he thought about even a second too long would send him careening towards a ledge. 

“I’m sure she’s fine,” he heard from beside him suddenly, jumping slightly as he turned to see Coyote and he gave him a soft smile. 

“I know,” he replied and Coyote just nodded.

“She’s tough. Like, scary tough, my shoulder still makes a weird creaking sound from when she tackled me during dogfight football,” he said and this made Jake laugh, something that was pretty infrequent now.

“I still can’t believe she took you down like that,” he replied.

“Yeah, that one fights dirty, man… so I’m sure she’s holding her own just fine.” This provided Jake just enough reassurance in the moment that he was able to shift his focus somewhere else entirely, so much so that he didn’t notice the way Rooster pulled out his phone and quickly ran out of the bar.

“J?” he asked, the video on his phone taking its sweet time connecting and he heard his second-favorite laugh on the other end.

“Hey Roo, sorry, the video is super spotty here,” you said just as it fully connected and he finally got to see you for the first time since your wedding night. His first thought was that you looked different, almost unrecognizable if it weren’t for those few characteristics that were so completely you. You were thinner, primarily in your face and he couldn’t ignore the way your eyes lacked their usual warmth, it sent an ache through his chest to see you look so… hollow. 

“How are you? Are you okay? What’s going on over there?” he fired off in rapid succession and this pulled another soft laugh from your lips. You hadn’t realized how much you needed to see that stupid porn stache until it was staring back at you through the screen of a tablet. 

“Don’t worry about me, I don’t have long so tell me everything… what have I missed?” you asked and briefly he wanted to press, try to get you to open up about what you were going through over there but he realized that probably wasn’t what you needed right now. You needed a distraction, reminders of home, and you didn’t have much time to get it.

“Well, Eliza and I made things official a few days ago,” he said and you smiled, a real one that almost fully reached your eyes.

“Oh my god, that’s amazing! I’m so happy for you, Roo. Where did you take her for your first date?”

“Well, our unofficial first date was your wedding, but the real first date was mini golf… where she completely smoked me by the way,” he said and you chuckled. “She’s… incredible, JJ, I’ve never met a woman like her before.”

“Well I’ll be damned, Bradley Bradshaw is serious about someone? I leave for two months and suddenly the world turns upside down.”

“Shut up, I’ll have you know I’ve been serious about people before,” he protested before adding, “but not like this. I think this is it, J.”

“You keep that to yourself for a while longer, don’t spook her too soon,” you teased. “How is he?” you asked suddenly, getting serious and he knew what you meant without further clarification.

“He’s… good,” he replied and you furrowed your brows. “He’s just worried, is all. Just wants to know if you’re okay, we all do.” 

You nodded, “I don’t know if I am, Roo… and you can’t tell that to him, okay? I just… I don’t want him worrying anymore than he already is.”

“I won’t, but… talk to me? What’s going on over there?”

You sighed, “I don’t have enough hands, or supplies, or time… I’m picking and choosing who lives and who dies based on a twenty second evaluation and I just… never know if I’m making the right choices, never know if I’m actually making a damn difference out here.”

“Hey, you are. If I know you like I think I do, I know you are.”

You nodded but it didn’t really do anything to make you feel better. “I know this is our turn, but-”

“I texted him a few minutes ago, he should be out any second,” Rooster cut you off and you just smiled softly. 

“Thank you. I miss you way more than I thought I would, Roo,” you said and he let out a shocked laugh.

“What the hell does that mean?” he asked but he was interrupted by the door to the patio opening.

“Come outside in two minutes, alone? What kind of cryptic bullshit is that, Chicken?” you heard distantly and couldn’t help but laugh, warmth filling your chest at hearing your husband's voice after so long. “Is that- give me that,” he said, snatching the phone from Rooster’s hand and confirming for himself it was really you.

“Hey you,” you said and you thought his face might split open from how wide he was grinning. “Might want to not be so hard on Rooster, seeing as he gave up some of his phone time for you.” 

“God, I miss you, are you okay?” 

You nodded, forcing yourself to smile and Jake saw right through it, saw the way it didn’t fully reach your eyes. “I’m okay.”

“I’ll give you guys space,” Rooster said from beside Jake, “I love you, JJ, stay safe, okay?”

“Love you too, Roo,” you replied and suddenly there was a commotion from outside your tent that made him stop in his tracks as Jake’s eyes widened in concern.

“Jupiter, what’s going on?” he asked, trying to pinpoint the sounds he was hearing. The visual was blocked by you pressing the tablet against your chest as you poked your head outside the tent and the sound became clear as day on their end. Gunfire. 

“I have to go.”

“Jupiter, talk to me,” Jake tried but you’d barely heard it, barely registered.

“I can’t- I’m sorry, I love you,” was all you said before the call disconnected and Jake stood there frozen, staring at a black screen as he tried to process what had just happened. 

“Was that…?” Rooster started, not entirely sure of what to say. He knew whatever he was feeling was magnified in Jake tenfold, but that didn’t make it any easier to push through to try and be there for him. 

“I think so,” Jake said after clearing his throat. Logically he knew you’d face situations like this, it was the biggest thing he was struggling to come to terms with, but actually hearing it was a completely different beast. Right now he was standing here with your best friend on the patio overlooking the ocean at sunset… it was peaceful, yet somewhere halfway across the world you were under fire, undoubtedly under stress as you were probably assessing wounded soldiers and civilians, trying to do your job the best you could. 

Rooster noticed the slight tremble in Jake’s hands, noticed the way he was currently retreating into himself and trying to not spin out and he gently pulled the phone away and put a hand on his shoulder. “Hey man, come on, let’s go sit for a minute,” he said, and Jake followed him almost mindlessly out onto the beach where they both sat down. “I know this might not sound helpful, but she’s been out there two months already, I’m sure this isn’t the first time… she knows how to handle herself.”

Jake let out a humorless laugh, “you’re right, it’s not.” He knew what Rooster’s intentions were behind the sentiment, you’d gone through this before and made it out the other side, and you’d do it again now, but all it served as was a reminder that this was your life right now. He was focused on the fact that you didn’t sound worried at all, you’d said you had to go and that you loved him as simply as you used to when you’d call him in between patients. He was sitting here, mind spinning with the possibilities of what could be happening and you’d sounded as calm as ever. That should have proved reassuring, in some small way, you weren’t fazed… you weren’t scared, but it wasn’t. If anything, it made his chest ache more. 

“She’s gonna be okay, man. It’s Jupiter, she can handle anything,” Rooster said, even though he might not have fully meant it. He saw you, heard the unsure tone as you spoke to him and saw those hollow eyes, you were different. You weren’t the Jupiter you left as, weren’t the Jupiter they knew like the back of their hands… and Rooster knew it would happen, had told you as much sitting right here in this same spot just a few months ago. 

“I don’t know… I should have told her no, told her not to do it, anything to get her to stay put,” Jake sighed and Rooster chuckled.

“We are talking about Jupiter right?” he asked and Jake couldn’t help but laugh too. “She knew what she was signing up for. We talked about it, you know... what she'd see, what she'd do, briefly, but she knew. She never bites off more than she can chew.”

“Yeah, I think this time is different,” Jake said and Rooster nodded.

“Maybe… but she’s got you, and she’s got the rest of us. We’ve all got her, no matter how she is when she comes home.”

“If she comes home,” Jake nearly whispered and this took Rooster aback. It felt like a weight off his back to finally say his biggest fear out loud, but only seconds later that weight came crashing down as he fully realized it was a genuine possibility. It wasn’t some hypothetical worst case scenario he’d concocted, hearing that gunfire proved that, it was simply how things were. If you came home. 

“You can’t think like that right now. Her tour is over in just a few weeks, she’ll pull through.” 

Jake sighed again, “I just need to know that she’s safe.”

“She’ll call when she can. That much I know for certain, I’m sure she didn’t want to leave things like that. She’ll call, or she’ll email just as soon as she’s able.” 

“I think I get it now,” Jake said and Rooster gave him a confused look, “why she likes you so much,” he practically mumbled and Rooster laughed. 

“Come on, man. There’s nothing either of us can do except wait, and she wouldn’t want you spinning out over this. Let’s go back inside,” he said as he stood and dusted the sand from his pants, and Jake followed reluctantly. He was right after all, he couldn’t do anything right now except go back inside, nurse his beer and hope you were okay.

taglist: @mamaskillerqueen @clancycucumber230 @the-romanian-is-bae @alldaysdreamers @zzsloth @emma8895eb @novagreen04 @classyunknownlover @purplevortexx @mamachasesmayhem @ohgodnotagainn @smoothdogsgirl @swiftsgirlfriend @memoriesat30 @the-fandom-ness @midnightmagpiemama @shanimallina87 @charles11700 @angelbabyange @wildxwidow @sp1rit-realm @alluringshawn @taytaylala12 @starcatcher48 @buck-nasty @misshoneypaper @4evinlovewithfictionalmen @devil-angel-winchester @callsignspirit @thegodessc @failuretothrivestuff @olliepig @cruelmissdior @underaveragefangirl @grxcieluvr @amatswimming @camilaricci @nolita-fairytale @dempy @pinkpantheris @aviatorobsessed @tiredqueen73 @pono-pura-vida @binnieslove @nik2blog @waklman @abaker74 @halstead-severide-fan @percysaidnever @memeorydotcom @eli2447 @dumb-fawkin-bitch @toobouquet @a-v-a123 @rae-you-gotta-be-kidding-me @86laura11 @justenoughmadnesss @yoonbutterfly @djs8891 @mamamaystbr

[radfemsiren]

Hey, I'm an ex Muslim (closeted ). i have a Muslim roommate we're in college, and she's a religious fanatic/apologist. and constantly defends mohamed even though he's a pedophile. and fully supports how Muslim countries treat women, i.e., Afghanistan. How do I change her mind without blowing my cover? This is my first taste of independence away from my family, and I don't want to go back (sorry for the bad grammar)

Hello, thanks for this ask ❤️ Honestly, if you fear your independence might be threatened by challenging this person, don’t engage with them. There’s a lot of Muslims I’ve deprogrammed successfully, and every single one of them took years to ever admit to me that they were wrong. The shortest time was a full year, pride is a funny thing lol. So even if you change this person’s mindset, there’s a high chance they will remain hostile to you… and if you are risking your safety and independence, then it’s not worth it.

If you are completely safe, and want to engage, then I always recommend the method of playing dumb and asking questions… when they have to come up with the answers themselves, it always helps them reach the conclusions you need them to with less resistance.

Don’t say, “Muhammad was a pedophile, why do you support that?!”

Ask:

“What do you think of the age of Aisha?”

“Do you think that’s ok?”

“If you had a daughter, would you let a 60 year old man marry her when she’s that age?”

“What do you think of gay people? Do they deserve to go to hell?”

“Why is Christianity not the truth, and Islam is? What makes us different, when we both say we are the truth?”

“Why are there no female prophets?”

“Why must women pray behind the man?”

“Why are we dirty when we are on our period? Why can’t we pray or fast?”

“Why do we have to wear hijab and men don’t?”

Frame every problem and logical inconsistency with Islam as a question.

This gives you 2 benefits:

1. It doesn’t tire you out. They do the majority of the talking and fighting, with themselves now instead of you.

2. They are not on guard. They don’t perceive you as an outsider on the attack. Brainwashed people in high control religions automatically shut down critical thought when they feel threatened. Play like you genuinely want to understand, and they won’t feel like you are on a different team.

You can have strong Hadiths and clear ayahs on hand, but most religious people are religious because they don’t like to investigate or look for evidence.

Showing them clear evidence in a straightforward way and treating them like adults is surprisingly way less effective than gentle parenting them, and treating them like babies lol

[ithinkdogshouldvote2]

Dndads Headcanons, season 2 kiddads and teens (appearance based)

the order of the kiddads from tallest to shortest is: terry jr, sparrow (by like half an inch), lark, grant, nick (but none of them are really all that short)

Lark, sparrow, and nick all have their ears pierced but sparrows holes closed up and he didn't wanna relive the traumatic experience of re-piercing them, while larks have gotten infected so many times he just stopped trying.

Terry dresses like a substitute teacher literally every day of this fucking life.

Sparrow is almost always wearing a bathrobe or a comfy cardigan. He dresses like a mixture of a female therapist and a deranged housewife.

Lark dresses like he's in the walking dead

Nick has a frankly absurd amount of Christmas sweaters and it's VERY obvious which ones are from Glenn.

Grant has curly hair.

both lark and sparrow need glasses. sparrow wears his when he needs them, but Lark never wears them because they make him look like henry.

terry jr also wears glasses and started wearing rons after he died.

scary was born with blonde hair, but it's gotten darker as she got older. right now, it's a light brown/sandy blonde. when her mom and terry Jr. got engaged, he tried to bond with scary by pointing out that their hair was almost the same color. she dyed it black the next day.

on the topic of hair dye, taylor tried to dye his hair electric blue when he was in middle school and had to buzz it all off cause he destroyed it with bleach. he cried for 2 weeks.

both scary and taylor regularly paint their nails. normal TRIES to paint his nails but then gets annoyed that now they taste gross and ends up picking off all the nail polish before its even finished drying

btw normals nails are so fucked up. just absolutely destroyed. theyre so bad. he has never cut them hes only ever bitten them off.

on the other hand Lincolns nails are really well kept. he pushes back his cuticles and everything.

the only non-sportswear type clothing that lincoln owns are garfield t-shirts. he has alot of them

Scary is taller than Taylor, but only when she's wearing her combat boots, which add like 2 inches to her height.

Lincoln is only taller than Terry jr by an inch (and 6 feet lmaooo)

Everyone's taller than normal.

Lark and sparrow both have a dimple on one of their cheeks but it's the opposite side of the others.

Normal has dimples on both cheeks!

Taylor only has horns when he's using magic or really angry and they're very small. When he saw them for the first time he got pissed cause they're nothing like his trollsonas.

Taylor totally has an ahegao hoodie.

Taylor has a t-shirt that's just a written apology to women for his ahegao hoodie

Normal has a lot of nasa hoodies that he keeps stealing from hero to piss her off

Scary stole one of Terry jr cardigans, dyed it back, and ripped it up to make it goth cause she THOUGHT it would piss him off. But it backfired, and terry started wearing it around the house to be supportive.

Scary also secretly stole one of Terry Jr's old band t-shirts for herself cause she thought it was cool. Terry knows she has it but will not say a goddamn word cause he thinks it's so sweet.

Grant has a picture of baby Lincolns face on a t-shirt next to the titanic that says "I survived the titanic and all I got was this stupid baby" given to him by nick that he has never worn because it's mean but it's collecting dust in a closet somewhere in the house. Lincoln found it once but didn't understand it cause he never saw the titanic, so he just didn't say anything.

[mopeylopey1]

hello I am writing something for the first time ever and it is about mr bilbo baggins

the shortest way I can explain it is if u took a traditional cultural misunderstanding fic set in post-botfa erebor and swapped it so bilbo thought thorin was courting him bc everyone keeps saying that’s what he’s doing (cue the mithril shirt) except he’s not he’s just trying to engage more in hobbit culture so bilbo feels less lonely (bc he is in love with him) (they are in love with each other)

[theravenchild]

7, 11 and 15 for the ask game, please 💙

Diana! Thank you for sending these asks! ☺️ I'm so sorry it took so long to finish the reply, but I just kept adding to it and researching! Some of it was just loosely established lore and I had to delve deeper.

7. Describe your MC’s family.

Hellendil comes from a family of mixed background. His father is a muggle blacksmith/metal worker with Lenape ancestry and his mother a Welsh witch who found her calling as a metal charmer and jewelry maker. She was a world traveler after Hogwarts, frequenting worlds fairs and expos in search of materials and new techniques to use in her craft. She met her future husband at one such expo showcasing new technology and techniques as well as suppliers from around the world. With the industrial revolution underway, he needed to find new avenues for his own profession to stay relevant and these fairs were an excellent place to learn.

The two hit it off during one of the panels and continued writing to one another after returning home. He eventually sent a letter to her father asking for her hand with an engagement gift of raw garnets and amethysts he'd collected for use in her craft. When they married, he moved to Wales and worked under another smith until the proprietor eventually retired and sold him the business and property. The pair raised their four children in the house next to the smithy with help from her parents.

Hellendil's older sister is about 5'11" with dark brown hair. She is a more stern and straightlaced individual than her older brother, but also did not inherit any magical ability. As with all of the siblings, she was taught the arts of blacksmithing and jewelry making by their parents. She is a strong and dedicated individual and chose to follow the blacksmith path to a career. She apprenticed to another smith to learn more before she would eventually take over her father's business. With the rapid changes in metal working and technology at the time, she also frequently travels to attend technology fairs as her father did to learn new techniques and be prepared to adjust her work and the business to those changes.

Hellendil is the youngest of four children in the family. His eldest sibling, his brother, is 6'4" and wears his black hair long as well. He is a squib and a bit of a trouble maker in his youth in quest to be the center of attention. He wished to pursue a career as a dragonologist when he was growing up. Out of concern for his safety, the family talked him into an archaeology career instead, a career he is quite happy with after all. He currently assists with archeological digs in Egypt and frequently writes to his little brother about the finds and traces of magical history they are uncovering. He's constantly telling Hellendil to pursue a career as a curse breaker and come work with him.

His youngest sister is three years older and also possessed magical talent. She is the shortest sibling at around 5'7". She has black hair and likes to wear it in cute styles. She attended Hogwarts as well and was sorted into Hufflepuff. She is fun and vibrant, and a hopeless romantic, frequently reading romance novels (and passing them down to her little brother). She is currently working with her mother at the jewelry shop since she is undecided as to what she truly wants to do with her life.

11. What are your MC’s fears?

Ever since the confrontation with Rookwood, Hellendil's greatest fear is the darkness he is capable of when he becomes infuriated. So much anger and hate fueled powerful magic that helped him easily overpower his enemies, but once it was over he was a wreck over what he had done. Yes, he'd avenged Anne and Sebastian and numerous others that Rookwood had cursed or killed, but at what cost? The memory haunts him, especially at times when he's alone and unoccupied.

He also certainly fears loss, especially of those he cares about. He's seen so much loss during fifth year, it's one of those things that will show up in nightmares, and jostle him awake. It keeps him up at night, worrying.

15. What is your MC’s ideal first date?

I did answer this one earlier so I will link it here rather than retyping. ☺️

[hanafubukki]

Hey, Hana, here's Q; You get to marry Lilia but in exchange you can only eat the food he makes for the rest of your life. Would you do it? (This includes snacks as well.)

….Violet do you want me dead? Lmao 🤣😆

I think it would be the shortest marriage ever…unless Malleus blessed me against Lilia’s food or some type of invincibility. 🤔

If I don’t get that blessing or it doesn’t work 🧐 I don’t mind being in the “engaged” status forever lolol hey I want to live happily with him okay? Not traumatize him with my death. 😆

Got to think like a fae and find loopholes lolol

[sunflowervoltwentyeight]

Happy 28th! Here's my September 2023 fic rec, organized by word count, from longest to shortest. Enjoy!

Save Me (From Myself) by imogenlee / @imogenleewriter (159k)

The problem with being friends with Liam Payne was that he had a lot of friends... and forced them to be around each other. When they finished high school, both Louis and Harry were equally relieved that they wouldn't have to tolerate each other constantly or whatever it was that they did.

For five years, it worked out perfectly. They'd only had to see each other a handful of times.

Unfortunately, Liam had to go and get engaged, ask them to both be groomsmen, and then go full groomzilla on their arses. With just twelve weeks to plan the 'perfect' destination wedding and throw every ridiculous pre-wedding celebration Liam and his fiancée stumble across, it was safe to say they were firmly back in each other's lives.

And no one could have predicted that was exactly what they needed.

We Are Only Just the Beginning by afirecannotdie (129k)

In the dim light of a dorm kitchen, Harry Styles meets a boy who flips his life upside down. Three years later, he's a senior in college, ready to take on the world with the love of his life by his side. And then Louis Tomlinson admits he doesn't know what he wants to do after college after all, and Harry's world flips again, this time not so pleasantly. He can't imagine his life without Louis, but he's starting to worry he might have to.

A college AU featuring lots of domestic sappiness, waffles, tattoos, late nights and early mornings, and above all, Louis and Harry against the world.

Been Together Since Way Back When by alivingfire / @alivingfire (95k)

Louis Tomlinson is a law student with a simple but effective four step plan: 1. Finish law school. 2. Get hired somewhere awesome. 3. Marry his best friend and boyfriend of two years, Harry. 4. Live happily ever after.

Harry Styles doesn't know what he wants to do with his life, where he wants to go, who he wants to be, or if he even wants the college degree he's almost completed. All he does know is who he’ll be with forever, as long as Louis wants to keep him around.

Or: the painfully realistic college au where everyone's poor, lovesick, tired of school, terrified of the future, and still having the greatest times of their lives.

Such Good Luck by casuallyhl / @casuallyhl (66k)

Louis smiles at Harry’s words, leaning into his touch. “Tell me again.”

Smiling, Harry takes Louis into his arms. Pressing gentle kisses to his face, Harry murmurs, “In six months’ time, I will have my twenty-fifth birthday. On that day, my portion of the inheritance will become legally mine. And I plan that very day to announce to my family that I have found love.” Harry chuckles as he runs his lips lightly along Louis’ cheekbone. “That, in fact, I found love when I was twenty-one years old, and that I have loved and been loved every day since.”

Or, an Edwardian AU where Harry is a young aristocratic lord and Louis is a working class dairy farmer. Secrets are a necessary part of their relationship, but Louis has one that could topple their whole world.

I'll Crash Until You Notice Me by stylinsoncity / @stylinsoncity

Louis sets off to Barbados to oversee the massive resort his family owns known as Sandy Hill. For years, he's been looking for a change in the monotony of his life, seeking adventure and perhaps love too. What he doesn't expect is the bright eyed boy who spills a milkshake on his shoes.

Cue the summer loving.

You Were In My Dream by staybeautiful / @harruandlou (59k)

“I had a sex dream about Harry.” Louis slapped his free hand over his mouth after the words slipped out.

Zayn paused, his hand freezing as he was about to take a bite, his head snapping up to look at Louis. Louis could relate, it’s how he’d felt that morning after he’d woken up. He’d laid in bed for fifteen minutes trying to figure out what had happened, why it had turned him on so much, and then patiently waiting for his erection to go down.

“Like… my Niall’s Harry? Harry Styles?” Zayn clarified, his face bewildered as if trying to comprehend what had just happened. “Do you even like Harry?”

“His last name is Styles?”

or Louis woke up after having a sexy dream about his best friend’s boyfriend’s best friend resolved to never think about it again. He hardly knew Harry, so what difference would it make? But when they are thrown together only a few days later, Louis had to admit, his subconscious might have been onto something.

Lost In the Silver Sea by you_explode / @nobodymoves (42k)

Harry’s felt powerless for so long now. They took away his voice last year and it feels like every day they somehow take away more of it. It feels impossible to ever get some power back, to ever speak. Every day he feels more like a puppet, like a marionette, a ventriloquist’s dummy. Like the price he has to pay to live his dream is to sacrifice his voice, his own self, and become a shell of whoever they want him to be.

But he has Louis. Thank god he has Louis.

*

Non-AU. From MSG 2012 to MSG 2018; or, Harry and Louis keep having their voices silenced, and they keep finding ways to speak.

Player by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom (28k)

Louis’ job should be simple. Harry Styles, one of the top ranking tennis players in the world, is every publicist's perfect client. He’s charismatic, enigmatic, and fit as fuck. The darling of the media, a national treasure, and a sponsor's wet dream. He’s also a goofball with the kindest heart, sweet, and polite, and singularly focused on achieving his goals.

There are just two minor problems. Firstly, Louis' debilitating crush on said client. And secondly, Harry has just accidentally Instagrammed a picture of his dick to his 18 million followers. So no, Louis’ job is anything but simple.

OR the one where Louis is Harry’s highly strung publicist and has a thing for his client, Harry is an international sports star and has a thing for his publicist, Liam and Zayn have a thing for each other, and Niall wishes everyone would just get their shit together.

[sephirothsplaything]

DNA| Sec.80 high power-chapter 6.1

A/N: Me when this is the shortest chapter i've ever written. Yes this is filler but I promise some of the stuff in here will be important later on.

also, young rhaella flashback with her mommy TT

Kings Landing, Aemond’s 12th name day, Pre the death of Lady Laena Velyeron.

“ I wish to ride with father!” A young Baela exclaimed. The family was preparing to set off towards King’s landing for Aemond Targayen’s twelfth name day.

Laena smiled fondly at her daughter. She glanced at her youngest, Rhaella. With her large, violet eyes and her silver curls piled into an updo on her head, the girl was only one and ten years of age.

“Would you like to ride on Caraxes, Rhaella?” Laena asked. Rhaella shook her head furiously. Her father’s red dragon was much too fast for her liking. Instead, she turned towards her mother’s own dragon, Vhagar.

Baela pulled Rhaena by Caraxes, sticking her tongue out to Rhaella childishly.

“Rhaena and I shall have all the fun!” Baela said. Rhaella clutched the wrapped gift in her hand, intended for her cousin Aemond.

“Baela, be nice.” Laena reminded. Daemon looked on at his children in amusement. He couldn’t understand where Rhaella’s quiet nature came from.

Daemon helped his two twins onto Caraxes, before hiking himself to mount. Rhaella watched the dragon take off into the sky in envy.

One day, she’d hope. One day she too will be in the skies.

“Come, my love, let us be off,” Laena said. Rhaella’s tiny brown hand brushed against Vhagar’s hardened scales. The mighty she-dragon allowed it, even softly chuffing at the action.

Laena picked up her daughter, mounting Vhagar. The dragon was slow to leave the ground as Laena tightened her grip on the reigns.

“Vhagar, sōvēs.” She said. Rhaella held onto her mother’s waist as the weight shifted and the dragon took to the sky.

“Are you excited to see your cousins, Rhaella?” Laena asked. Rhaella hummed thoughtfully. Her older cousin, Helaena, was three and ten years old and was always nice to her. Rhaella had been eager to speak with her again. She hated Aegon, his sleazy gazes made her want to hide.

“I took one of Father’s books, for Aemond,” Rhaella said. Laena couldn’t fight the smile. Daemon would be deeply annoyed at the discovery.

“I’m sure Aemond will appreciate it, dear,” Laena said.

After a while, the pair flew over Kings Landing. Laena landed Vhagar a ways away from the city. Laena jumped down from her dragon, helping Rhaella off as well.

Rhaella adjusted the blush-colored fabrics of her dress. The matching headband was off-centered due to the wind. Chuckling, Laena adjusted it on Rhaella’s head.

“There, and how pretty you look!” Laena gushed. She glanced at the book in her daughter’s hands with a playful smile.

“I’m sure Aemond will agree as well,” Laena said. Rhaella looked away from her mother bashfully. She was always saying things like that. Rhaella supposed her mother liked to jest.

Mother and daughter walk to the gates of the Red Keep. In the outer courts, the festivities had long since begun.

Rhaella could see her two sisters already in conversation with their cousins, Jace and Luke. 

“Laena, I see you’ve made it.” A voice rang. Princess Rhaenyra approached the two, smiling eagerly. Rhaella watched the two women embrace as she stood awkwardly to the side.

Pulling back from Laena, Rhaenyra smiled at the small girl by her side.

“ Aren’t you just a proper lady!” Rhaenyra said. Rhaella gave a shy smile to the princess.

Leaving the women to catch up, Rhaella walked over to the long table. Baela was engaged in a spirited conversation with Jace while Rhaena and Luke watched on.

“Where is Aemond?” Rhaella asked. She had noticed that the boy was nowhere to be seen, and on his name day no less.

“I don’t much care,” Baela said. Rhaella’s eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. She had thought her sister would have the courtesy of being a little softer on this day.

Rhaella abandoned the group, wandering far from the party. The bright sun was beaming down on her face, temporarily obscuring her vision.

Then, she saw him. Propped up in front of a Weirwood tree, there sat Aemond.

Rhaella sighed out, glad her walking efforts we not in vain. She took a seat in the grass opposite to him.

Aemond glanced up in surprise. Rhaella and her quiet footsteps had startled him.

“I suppose everyone is missing me if they sent you here,” Aemond said. Rhaella toyed with the book’s wrapped parchment.

“ In truth, no one much cares,” Rhaella said, rather bluntly. Despite her tone, her eyes met his, clear with mirth. 

“I thought as much,” Aemond said, sullen look deepening. His attention was pulled to the present in the girls’ hands.

“What’s that?” Aemond asked. Rhaella passed the book to him.

“It’s for you,” Rhaella said. Aemond eagerly ripped apart the covering, revealing the book.

‘ Dragons and Histories’ 

“ Father will be cross with me for taking it, but we have plenty of others,” Rhaella said.

“Thank you, Rhaella,” Aemond said gratefully. Rhaella shrugged. She had read through the same book many times herself. She knew her cousin shared the same hunger to learn.

Scooting closer to him, Rhaella flipped to a page she knew well. Sketches of Balerion, the Black Dread filled the page. Among all the dragons, Rhaella favored him above all else. 

“Father told me he was named after the Old Valyrian God of death,” Rhaella said. Aemond looked at her in awe. His cousin always seemed to know much and more than he ever could. 

“I want a dragon like that,” Aemond said. He longed for something undeniable in power. Something that the realm would have no choice but to acknowledge.

“I think I would too.” Rhaella agreed. Aemond gave her a side glance.

“ Balerion was ridden by Aegon the Conqueror, he would be best suited for a man.” 

Rhaella scoffed at the absurdity of the comment. “ Princess Aerea rode him, you should know that if the maesters have taught you anything at all.” She said.

Aemond fell silent at Rhaella’s scolding. Rhaella’s eyes soften. Perhaps she had been too harsh, it was his name day after all.

“One day, you and I will fly all over the realm together,” Rhaella said. 

“I want to see the ruins of Old Valyria,” Aemond said. Rhaella pulled a face. Old Valyria was a dangerous place but she declined to add the fact in for Aemond’s sake.

“I’d much rather see Dorne,” Rhaella said. It was the only place their ancestors couldn’t overtake. Her curiosities regarding the place always bubbled over.

“Dorne, why?” Aemond asked. Rhaella closed the book, pushing it to the side.

“It’s warm and the women are fair,” Rhaella said. Aemond glanced at her in confusion.

“Perhaps I’d marry a Dornish prince as well. Rhaella added. Aemond grimaced. Why she would venture to Dorne for a husband? It was beyond him.

“They’re all right, you are quite strange,” Aemond said. Rolling her eyes, Rhaella stood up in a huff, dusting off her dress.

Aemond stood as well, placing the book under his arm. 

“I don’t much like being called that,” Rhaella said. The two began walking to the festivities. Rhaella was fixed on not missing the cake.

Suddenly, Rhaella halted in place, a sly smile dancing across her face. Turning to Aemond, she places a peck on his cheek, causing the boy to freeze.

A furious blush makes its way to Aemond’s cheek, much to Rhaella’s enjoyment.

“What was that for?” Aemond asked, fumbling his words.

Rhaella stared at him in bemusement. She turned to continue walking, Aemond quick on her heels. 

“You should cheer up, cousin,” Rhaella said.

“I’m here for you, after all.” 

[purgemarchlockdown]

Milgram and The Prince

(A Companion to my Rose Bride post you can read here, not necessary to read as I reestablish all the necessary points I made there here but it be nice to see another person read it) (CWs: Unhealthy Power Dynamics, Sexism, Discussions of Ownership in the context of Marriage, allusions to sexual abuse)

(Spoilers for Utena!)

So, as I discussed in the post linked above. In Revolutionary Girl Utena, There is a dichotemy between a Prince and Princess, with Princesses being (in the shortest way I can explain it) an unrealistic and unhealthy expectation for women to fit into a role that Lacks Autonomy and Power, and if they don't they get demonized and branded as a Witch, and Princes is an unrealistic and unhealthy expectation for men to have Complete Power, Autonomy and Control over Princess.

When we get into the Rose Bride we delve into the ideas of ownership, abuse and demonization, as the Rose Bride should Obey Whatever Their Betrothed Tells Them To Do. This Prince is who we are focusing on for this post.

"She looks gallant in a guy's uniform, but she looks perfect in a dress, too!"

Let's start off with Mikoto and John, as they're the best jumping off point when talking about the dynamic of the Prince and the Rose Bride.

Now, while the Rose Bride (and princesses) as a Role is very traditionally feminine and rooted in gender and well, misogyny. Mikoto actually has been heavily Associated with traditionally feminine characteristics and stereotypes. (Mikoto Interrogations)

T1Q4: Do you pay attention to fashion? A: Of course. No one would want to request something from a designer with no fashion sense, right?

T1Q10: Have you ever gotten angry at other people? A: I don't think I've gotten angry before. Isn't it kind of disgraceful to get angry?

Me, the newborn other you

In Isolation, these characteristics don't hint at anything, however when them put together, plus idea that John was "born" from Mikoto and how he even gets tied into with the rest of the girls by how he repeats his T1 Title and is the Only Guy that does so creates a interesting association with Mikoto and Femininity.

Not only that but Mikoto is Heavily Sexualized In MeMe.

A detail that's strange when even Yuno, who Wears Lingerie in Teardrop. Doesn't get sexualized in the same way Mikoto does. When Mikoto is on screen in MeMe the camera is Gazing at him. Watching him take off his shirt and bathe.

(Utena Scripts)

Anthy:  The one I'm engaged to can do as he pleases with me.

People haven noted that MeMe and Mikoto references a lot of classic horror and I'd like to mention that, not only is dying in a shower a common trope, especially in horror. It's a death that commonly happens to Women. To the point where, the TVTropes Page for Deadly Bath comments on it.

Whenever it's a killer or monster that's the cause of death, the victim is always a woman for some reason.

MeMe seems to be mainly referencing the 1960s Alfred Hitchcock film Psycho, and the most well known scene from the film is the murder of a woman in the shower.

Plus, said murderer, a character with a Very Demonized and Inaccurate Portrayal of DID, is also a transphobic stereotype who kills his mom and then dresses up as her to pretend that she's Still There.

Stepping aside the Many Issues with Psycho's Portrayal of DID and transphobia for a bit, these are More Examples of Mikoto being associated with Femininity.

But it doesn't even end there! Mikoto feels like a bystander in his own life, he's on a train going nowhere in Double. He's predicting his own fate in MeMe. He has no clue where his life is going and part of it is in the hand of someone he knows Nothing About. It's scary and terrifying and his agency is minimal and he doesn't even know who he really is at this point.

Why am I here? It must be a mistake? Take a good look at me Until you find me Why, hey why, I’m nowhere to be found So I will NEVER forgive you if this is happening to me even though I’m right Why, hey why, please let me out of here Please tell me it’s a mistake, that’s it’s a lie

I'd like to mention before I continue that Rypirotes actually pointed out this Exact Thing before! That Mikoto is the Damsel in Distress and John is his Heroic Knight. Or in my case, Mikoto is the Rose Bride, and John is the Prince.

Miki:  Her eyes are telling me... Miki:  that she wants to be set free. Miki:  I will protect you... Miki:  I will protect your beautiful sound, Himemiya-san!

Now the thing about the Princess/Prince dynamic in Utena is that it actually mirrors a dynamic present in Milgram, the Victim/Savior one. I mention this a bit in my Rose Bride post but I'm going to expand on it a bit more here.

We, the audience are very familiar with John positioning himself as Mikoto's savior, it's one of the first lines of Double we ever Heard.

Cling to me, hoist me up as your “savior”

Of course as we know Mikoto has been very Distressed about John and his presence. The loss of time and memory and control and the fear of not being the real "him" haunting him. Making him portray John in a more villainous and evil light.

John is pretty upset about this, but less because he's being portrayed as a villain (though that frustration of trying so hard and yet being feared is a part of it) and more because he feels like he Ruined Mikoto's Life in his attempts to save him.

If only I were never born, if only Why, why I’m so sorry.

Utena:  Instead, I just kept on pretending to be the Prince who could save you. Utena:  I was just being conceited about protecting you.

As we know, John's statements in Neoplasma are Unreliable, as he seemingly tries to shift all the blame of the murders to him in an effort to protect Mikoto since he was Born to Do That.

(Neoplasma)

John: That’s right. I’ll have to disappear eventually, anyway… Disappear, and take all of it with me. I… was born to protect Boku, after all.

The problem is not John wanting to protect Mikoto. It's that John in the attempt to protect Mikoto, harms him. It's not out of malice or some inherent flaw in his birth or anything like that. It's because John treats Mikoto as powerless.

John: It’s true that I was the one who wanted to destroy everything… and the weakness of Boku, who couldn’t stand up for himself all alone, might have been the origin of that. But… that’s all there is to it. Is that a sin?

While John puts Mikoto on a pedestal he also believes Mikoto to be weaker and needing protection, and no matter how True that statement may be, the way he helps Mikoto makes him feel powerless, confused and like a bystander in his own life.

Anthy:  Because I'm the Rose Bride...because I'm a doll with no heart... Anthy:  I thought that no matter what befell my body, my heart wouldn't feel the pain.

Welcome home, another day, another day with that hardly barely there of a smile You’re overdoing it, you’re already broken

John doesn't want to hurt Mikoto, he really doesn't. He just doesn't know what else he could Possibly do, he was made to take all of this on. That's what a Prince does.

Saionji:  So you want to be the prince who saves the helpless princess?

So he pushes people away, hides things from Mikoto, and so on. Because even though he doesn't really know what Mikoto wants from him, he believes this is the only way to help him. (Thank you Laniemae for drawing his paranoia in particular to my attention!)

Utena:  When you were suffering so much...when I had said we should save each other... Utena:  I'M the one who's unfair. I'm the one who's dirty. Utena:  I'm the one who betrayed you.

Hey, I just wanted to save you So why did it come to this?

Which just makes Mikoto's feelings of powerless worse and causes him confusion, worry and stress. And when that reaches a breaking point, John will need to clean up whatever mess gets left behind and the cycle starts again.

The dynamic of the Rose Bride and the Prince is one built on a Horrific Power Imbalance. You don't want to be The Rose Bride, and you don't want to be The Prince either.

"Instead of a princess to be protected, I want to become a dashing prince."

It might be strange to have Kotoko here when the Prince as an archetype both in and out of Utena is associated with men, however the thing about Kotoko is that she idealizes The Prince.

Voice:  but because of the strength of her admiration for the prince, Voice:  the princess made up her mind to become a prince herself! Voice:  But is that really good for her?

Now let's get something out of the way before I start this section, Kotoko has gone On Record saying she isn't exactly attached to the concept of femininity. (Kotoko Interrogations)

T1Q10: What do you think about the word 'feminimity'? A: It's one of the means you can take. It's something you can freely choose depending on the scene, so it's not something to cling onto.

This is Perfectly Fine Actually, as is Utena wearing the boys uniform and having "masculine" interests. Every time we see Utena in girl's clothes in RGU it is when she's at her lowest point and being denied who she is.

The problem is not that they present outside of the gender binary/aren't attached to it, but that they idolize Unhealthy Ideals that Reinforce a hierarchy of power.

Anyways, as established with John, The Prince as a role is one built on having power over someone. By positioning yourself as someone's "savior" you hold power over them and, even if you don't want to, harm them as a result.

Kotoko has seen the world to be cruel and unfair and the systems in place to not be enough to keep law in order. She's frustrated by how powerless she is and acts to make the world "better."

Utena:  You don't see Himemiya as anything but the Rose Bride either, do you? Touga:  Is that wrong? Utena:  It is wrong! Utena:  Cut it out with that "Rose Bride" or "possession" nonsense.

(Task)

Kotoko: Yes. I hate evil. Hurting innocent people with violence, taking away from others, killing people… I hate all this evil behaviour! The law being unable to judge some sins, there's too many of these cases in this world. Having clearly bullied and torturing the weak, but exploiting loopholes in laws, there's so many sinners who still live in such a carefree manner!

It seems like Kotoko might have some unresolved and buried trauma here, as while Kotoko herself says she wasn't bullied. She also stated that when she was already the person she was now back when she was around Amane's age.

T1Q18: Have you ever been bullied in the past? A: No. Are people who've had such pasts the only ones who're allowed to hate evil?

20/6/18

Amane: I see…… You look scary at first impression, but I quite like the way you treat everyone equally regardless of whether they’re older or younger than you. You don’t just treat me like a child or anything like that. Kotoko: Treat you like a child? Hah, you’ve got to be kidding. Back when I was your age, I was already the person I am today.

1moremilgramfan's analysis on Kotoko's clothing in Harrow over here is a fantastic dissection of Kotoko's character design and this aspect of it in particular but my point is that Kotoko tries her best to look strong and powerful, even when she's in emotional distress. She must look strong and powerful and not Weak.

I wonder what that reminds me of.

Kotoko idealizes the idea of there being some quick and easy way to save the whole world. Even if it isn't her that does it in the end.

I've chosen the awaited hero

But for now, if the system in place can't do it then She Will. She will the dashing prince that saves the helpless princess. She'll be the savior of the weak.

Let’s end this! “HARROW” “HARROW” I can’t forgive the evil hurting the weak It’s unforgivable, I won’t allow it, I sweared

But as I said, by positioning yourself as someone's Prince you begin to hold power over them and it's easy to start dehumanizing them and putting your wants and ideals above what they want. Their safety is reliant on yours after all. They can't fight back if you do something that harms them.

Utena:  That's right, I've got to protect Himemiya. Utena:  If anyone can return her to being a normal girl, it's me. Utena:  I can't let anyone else have her. Utena:  Not even my own prince.

Kotoko: From the begin I've never asked for your understanding! My actions, one by one, are bringing earth closer to peace. Useless Weaklings should just shut up and let me protect them!

And Kotoko seems to take a lot of joy and gratification in protecting people. She doesn't care as much about the victims as much as what she Gets Out of Saving them. Their wants are not as important as hers.

...Fufu... This feels so good.

Touga:  While she was engaged to you, the Code required her to obey you. Utena:  You're lying... Touga:  The Rose Bride answered the wishes of her master. Touga:  To make her an ordinary girl was merely what you wished.

By doing so, she perpetuates the cycle of violence she hated so much in the first place. You can see this in T2, by persecuting the guilty voters and physically harming them because she believes she's justified. Exerting power from them in a physical way and wanting to vote more people not forgiven so she can continue handing out righteous judgement.

Kotoko: I handed out retribution to the prisoners you chose to not forgive. Following MILGRAM’s system, I didn’t finish them off right away. You still need time to think, after all. …What’s with that face…? Aside from following your will, I’m deciding to leave the rest up to you. But… You’re too soft-hearted. I would have chosen to not forgive more prisoners. It’d be better if I were the prison guard… Well, just one thing is missing, I guess… I’ll stay put for now. I’ll wait until your next judgement is over, and then I’ll take action. Don’t worry, I’m on your side. Let’s bring judgement to the unforgivable evildoers.

These actions are harmful and dehumanizing, the victims are not people but a means to an end. It doesn't matter what Happens to them or even to Herself, as long as righteous judgement is brought upon those who "deserve it" for whatever reason she can come up with.

Kotoko idealized the idea of being a savior, and in the process, turned herself into a tool to harm.

Akio:  I've taken enough risks to buy the power to change the world. Akio:  That's how the world works-

"It's alright now. Please go on playing make-believe "Prince" in this comfortable little coffin forever."

Now, again you don't want to be the prince. as The Prince is an unachievable ideal that harms everyone and perpetuates cycles of violence.

However unlike the Rose Bride, the Prince Has More Power and Agency. Whoever is engaged to the Rose Bride has power over her. So, if your worldview can only perceive the roles of Prince and Princess, Savior and Victim, then of course you would want to be The Prince.

Let's talk Shidou Kirasaki.

Now, similar disclaimer to Amane's in the previous analysis. Since I've delving into the abuse the Prince perpetuates in a bit more detail. I am once again stating that while I Will Not discuss csa and sa in general here since we have no proof of Shidou doing that and for the sake of tact. However it will be Alluded to vaguely in the dialogue, especially since I'm focusing on the perpetrators of that abuse.

Once again, do what is good for your health and stay safe.

Now, unlike most of the princes in Utena, Shidou isn't doing this necessarily out of malice, he is not as bad as Akio Othori and I'm not going to pretend he is.

However even if his actions aren't necessarily done out of Malice it doesn't mean he doesn't benefit from it nor does it mean he doesn't harm anyone.

Now I talked a lot about Amane in my Rose Bride analysis but as I mentioned their, people are always constantly presenting themselves to Amane as "her prince," and are frustrated and upset when Amane shows that she can't be the victim they want her to be and Shidou is no exception to this.

22/10/24 (Shidou’s Birthday)

Amane: I warned you. I can no longer turn a blind eye to this wickedness taking place right in front of us. You’re bringing ruin unto yourself. Do you understand? Shidou: No, I don’t understand. It’s my job as an adult to teach you that throwing a temper tantrum isn’t going to make everything go your way.

In fact Shidou parallels her abusive parents a lot in his behavior by constantly ignoring and outright dismissing Amane's feelings and thoughts because he believes that Amane is "just a child."

20/06/13

Amane: ……*sigh*. Is that right. I don’t think I’m going to get along with you, Shidou-san. I don’t agree with the fact you refuse to acknowledge that I have my own free will, and that I should be held accountable for my actions, just because I’m a child. I may have only been alive for 12 years, but all the choices I’ve made, even if they weren’t the best ones, were entirely my own. What point is there in you getting sad when I have no regrets myself? ……please give me back my test. It seems you don’t have the concentration levels required to be my teacher. I’m going to get Kotoko-san to teach me instead. Shidou: Amane…… I don’t think that’s true. However smart you may be…… you’re still just a child.

Shidou doesn't see Amane as a person, he sees her as "child" and thus has less agency than Him. He's the one who should be making decisions for her because he's an adult. Whenever she reacts in a way he doesn't like he dismisses it, she's having one of the Worst Periods of Her Life right in front of him and he's dismissing it as just throwing a tantrum, something silly and childish.

Akio:  A child like you can't appreciate my ideals.

This isn't the only person he does this to, as Es also experiences his belittling and patronizing way of treating children. (Molech)

Shidou: Ah, well… I was just thinking about how despite being a child, you’ve really done your research on this. Es: Hey. [footsteps] You trying to make fun of me, is that it?  Shidou: What? Oh, no. I wasn’t trying to do anything like that. Es: You were. Something’s been on my mind ever since the very beginning… “Es, this. Es, that.” It’s the belittling way you refer to me…  I’m the prison guard, you know that? Shidou: Oh, I’m completely aware of that. But, you’re still a child in actuality. Coming from me, who’s almost twice the age as you are, I just…  Es: What is it? Shidou: For a child like you to be entrusted with this sort of role… My heart goes out to you. 

In a way he's exerting power over the both of them through this, he's an adult, more responsible and powerful than the both of them. It's, frankly, dehumanizing.

If the Rose Bride is an object to be projected on, the Prince is the one doing the projecting.

And as explained in the Rose Bride post, coffins in Utena represent cycles and eternity and to grow you need to break out of it. Shidou is stuck in his own coffin, keeps on trying to return to a life that Doesn't Exist Anymore and when he's faced with that knowledge and the way he's harmed the people around him because of that he continues to spiral.

He wants to die but he can't do it himself so he pushes the responsibility onto someone he doesn't consider as a person.

Shidou: I feel sorry that you had to be given this role. And, I truly apologise for being so insistent about sentencing me to death as well…  But, you’re perfect. You’ll give me the ending I’m most suited for. 

He wants to make up for his mistakes as a parent and pushes that onto someone he can project onto, even though that person has made it very clear how unwelcome and even painful it is for him to do that.

Shidou: Yeah. I’ll do what I can. I can’t have a child making a face like that.

He wants to live but he can only live if someone else is in pain because that means he has a reason to continue existing.

But there are lives that need safeguarding So hey, prolong my life, I’m indispensable

Shidou has fully admitted that he thinks his crime is a selfish one, he did it for himself. No matter How or Why he killed, we know he didn't value the people he killed that much.

“Throw down”, someone’s value Cannot be the same as another

You're in my way, hurry up and die.

The value comes from what they give to him, and in the end, their death was much more valuable to him than their life.

"The One Who Will Revolutionize the World"

Frankly, it's kinda pathetic to be a Prince.

It's is a coffin that one can stay in forever if they don't do anything. Something that harms you and everyone else...mostly everyone else. It's a role that brings about stagnation and immaturity. You can never revolutionize the world by being a Prince, all your doing is just perpetuating a cycle of harm.

Maybe Kotoko and Shidou will stay in their coffins, who knows really with them. They don't seem particularly in a hurry to get out, they don't even seem to notice their trapped in the first place.

Mikoto though...well...John really does want to understand, and Mikoto really does want to know what's happening.

And maybe that's enough.

Anthy:  But, you're a... Utena:  I came here to meet you. Utena:  So don't be afraid of this world where we'll meet. Utena:  ...Himemiya...Himemiya...Himemiya! Utena:  Himemiya! Anthy:  Utena...sama...? Utena:  Himemiya...we finally...meet.

END NOTES: I don't usually put these but since I plan to make this two part series one post minus the utena I might as well talk a bit.

I end this and the Rose Bride one so sappily but that's mostly cause I always need to remind myself after writing these that it's a Breakable Cycle. You write 2k+ words about characters being trapped in coffins and it Gets To You.

I'm so sorry to Fuuta for leaving him out of this...Mikoto and Kotoko kinda took your place...I know your literally a hero in your MV but I could not find a way to put you here without bloating it too much.

Funnily enough while the Rose Bride post had a lot to talk about The Prince is weirdly easy to summarize, the longest part here is when I talk about the themes of the Rose Bride and how that intersects with Mikoto. Though maybe that's just me. Another reason to write the compilation I guess.

I Swear there was more quotes about children and adults in Utena- I suppose it's a lot of its themes on adulthood are communicated visually and/or involve sex so like...yknow. Plus I'd have to explain the cars and it would take me all my effort to not put the Shiori car quote.

[witchofthesouls]

tfp idea, or in which the autobots find starscream with a hissy, squrimy beastformer sparklings (preferably a dromeosaurs of some kind), and get shock that starscream is actually very soft and good with babies.

(Okay, this is the initial scene where a few 'bots + Miko meets Starscream and his dinos. Do they agree with his methods? No. Is it effective and far less traumatizing than it could go? Definitely.

So the babies are babies to Cybertronians. Weird ones but still babies. But absolutely huge compared to humans. )

"Hey, guys, you're not going to believe what I found!"

______

Miko was perched upon Bulkhead’s shoulder, watching the epic battle between two metal mini-behemoths. A crocodilian and a raptor circled each other in the dirt. The raptor’s tail twitched, the long panels lining it and along its arms rippled and fanned in a strange amalgamation between feathers and scales. The crocodile rumbled in response, slower than its nimble opponent but far heavier as they were engaged in the ancient art of tug-of-war.

The oil drum between them groaned in protest, bending out of shape from the pressure.

"Scree!" Even across the empty field, the cry was absolutely ear-piercing as the reluctantly coaxed patient squirmed in Starscream’s grip and upon the makeshift medical station of a flattened boulder.

“Hush now. It’s a check-up. It won’t hurt.” It was hard to believe that not only Starscream went rogue, but somehow, someway became a daddy to dinos, but even as a witness, she never thought the Decepticon could have an almost gentle tone.

“Scree!”

“Must you hover us?” Ratchet was curt, hands trying to reach over.

“My hovering, as you put it, is the only thing keeping your servos whole and not a chew toy.” Starscream snapped. Despite the warnings of Decepticon lies, Miko absolutely believed him. That may be the shortest Cybertronian she’d seen, limbs rounded and armor far more simple than the others, even the horns were stubby upon the small helm with the longer set curving over a chubby face, but in the distance, Miko could spot the jutted and jagged fangs out of that mouth and the intense, slitted stare on Ratchet’s hands.

At that point, the barrel gave up and tore apart, bleeding chunks of Energon crystals, which the metal dinosaur babies, Miko had no other way to detail them, began to wolf down.

Ratchet immediately pressed his advantage when the dragon kid’s gaze turned away.

This, Miko firmly thought, was the coolest student exchange ever.

___________

Ratchet found the ports along the sparkling’s neck, digits jacking into them, and her struggles died as he used medical overrides to access everything.

If she didn’t like him before, then this cemented it.

“Sta-scree!” Her mouth was crowded by denta and it caused a lisp, but that word was definitely understandable as she utterly tried to reject Ratchet and dug deep into Starscream’s EM field, frightened and angry.

The other two sparklings heard the fear and immediately abandoned the treats, but partway through the charge, their energy flagged as they both dropped to the ground.

“Right on schedule,” Starscream commented.

“You drugged them!?” Ratchet hounded, even as he brought up the sparkling’s firewalls and anti-virals and scanned her entire systems, looking for damage from the insistent diet of raw crystals and ores. Surprisingly, nothing.

“I wasn’t going to let your troops bumble into my hideout, and you weren’t going let me into your base.” Starscream hissed back, wingspan flaring, even as his field twanged and curled over the distressed sparkling, trying to soothe her from the first medical check up- a real one, at least. “This was the compromise I could come up with at short notice. Tempest understands. The other two? Not so much. So they can have a full tank and a short nap or reinforced muzzles and inhibitor collars, and only one of those options is acceptable to me.”

As much as it galled him, the flyer was right. These three were unlike any sparklings Ratchet had treated: highly mobile in their alt-modes and capable of using their provided weaponry. It may not be transformative systems of blasters and swords, but Bulkhead could testify to the crocodile’s powerful bite force as it tried to wrestle the toy away and they’ve seen the raptor’s use of its large, deadly talon on its strange pede as it gouged trees, rockfaces, and steel.

The sparklings he was used to were far more dependent on caretakers and slow to develop their systems and frames.

Tempest sniffled between them, and their standoff was interrupted by the all-clear and completed updates he received. 

“With the limitations you had, she needed only minor updates and is fully functional.” It wasn’t an apology, but it was close enough and Starscream tensely nodded.

“Get ready to step away when you disengage.”

The moment he released her systems, Ratchet immediately backed up, just in time for that serrated denta to miss him. Tempest hissed and transformed back into her Predacon alt-mode, darting to Starscream’s side with her wingspan raised high and wide, pink optics blazing.

First visits were always the worst. Hopefully, the other two would stay asleep.