#the dumpster firework

[lengthofropes]

okay here’s something very important:

[octaviandoherty]

How's your relationship with your brother (Devlin)?

🖤anon

xtra close super bros + always have been

🌍 👨‍🚀🔫👈👨‍🚀

ain't that rite @devlindoherty ? 😆

[flannelepicurean]

Point of clarity: Cobra Kai is not the worst show you'll ever watch.

It's just the most show to ever TV.

[dogda]

the fun thing about having an anxiety disorder and living in a city is that at any moment you really might hear the loudest explosion you've ever heard before and there's no way to predict it, so in a way the anxiety is the right response

[happy74827]

Bittersweet Blunders

[Mike Schmidt x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: In what was supposed to be the "perfect date" turns into an absolute dumpster fire of a night. Fortunately for Mike, you couldn't care at all about it.

WC: 4295

Category: Mega Fluff

So it seems that a lot of people like my Mike fics (yay), so I wrote another one because why not. At this point, my entire masterlist will just consist of this man, and I'm 100% here for it. Also, I don't know why fluff is the hardest for me to write, but this is my attempt at a full-on cuteness overload without a drop of angst (I apparently live for the drama), so we'll see how this goes.

『••✎••』

You were a very bubbly, cheerful person. You always thought that it was one of the best qualities that someone could have, and while it wasn't always the case, it always helped you in the past to brighten up anyone's day, as well as the other way around. You were always the life of the party, and you'd always make sure that everyone had a great time whenever you were with them.

It was probably one of the reasons Mike had liked you so much, though it had taken him quite some time to admit it to himself. He didn't want to believe it at first; after all, Mike was usually the guy who kept his feelings in, but as time went on, he couldn't keep denying the fact that he liked your presence and always wanted to be around you.

For him, you were a ray of sunshine in his otherwise very dull life. Sure, Abby had been a joy, and still is, but you... you were just special in a way that Mike couldn't explain. You had a certain quality about you that he couldn't describe, and he's never been able to figure out what it is that made you stand out so much to him. You were the complete opposite of him. His black clothes, your bright smile. His gloominess, your cheerfulness. His silence, your bubbly voice. His abrasive demeanor, your kind words.

Even though you were completely opposite of him in personality, there was one thing that you both shared in common. You were both attracted to each other in a way that you couldn't explain, even to yourself. But it was a feeling that you were sure of, and the fact that you're finally together made you realize why.

When he had started dating you, it had been like the clouds parted for him. The sky cleared up, and everything felt right again. He felt like his life was finally stitching itself back together, and suddenly, he and Abby were a lot closer, too. It was almost like a weight was lifted off of his chest, and he was finally able to breathe again.

Your relationship was very new to him, as you were the first relationship he'd ever had. But now that you were with him, he wouldn't have it any other way. You were just... you. You made him happy in a way that no one else had, and he was determined to make sure that you felt the same way.

Of course, you felt the same way.

For you, Mike was your best friend. He had been the one person who'd been able to make you smile in your worst moments. He was always there when you needed him, and you'd always made sure to do the same thing for him. He was your ray of sunshine despite him not acting much like one. You loved the little things that made him tick, like his strange fascination with coffee and the fact that he always had a blanket in the car with him, just in case he was tired or cold. It made him feel like home to you.

And it was exactly how Mike felt with you, too, obviously for different reasons, of course, but all the same. He loved every single thing about you, no matter what. Your personality, your voice, even the way you walk, he loved every single bit of it. The first time you two had kissed, it was almost as though fireworks were going off all around you both, and Mike could've sworn he heard angels sing as well.

You were a ray of sunshine to him, and now that you were in his life, he couldn't see himself without you. He loved you more than he could say, and he was determined to show that to you, always.

That's why he decided he would take the day off of work to plan out the perfect date for you two. He didn't know exactly what you were into; you always seemed to be good with anything, but he knew he had to try and do something nice. After all, you were worth it. You were the most special person in his life, second to Abby, of course, but special just the same.

So he set off to find you a nice place to have dinner, a thing neither one of you had done since the start of the relationship. You had usually just eaten at his place or gone somewhere that served coffee (somewhere more in Mike's price range), but he wanted something a bit fancier; after all, today was special, and he saved up enough to make it happen. He wanted you to have a nice day out, just like you always did for him whenever he had a bad day.

He eventually found you a place, a fancy Italian restaurant that he thought you would like, and made reservations for a place with a nice view of the sunset, just so you could watch it with him. It was going to be a great night.

Of course, it had been the complete opposite of what Mike had thought it would be. Two hours before the planned evening, the person covering his job for him just had to cancel on him at the last minute, leaving him to panic. He hadn't told you the surprise for the evening at all, so he had to make several, several calls just to find a replacement for his job and then to find a babysitter for Abby. Max... Well, Max wasn't around much anymore, and since you were the usual babysitter for Abby, it took Mike a while to find someone who was available, and even when he did, it took nearly twenty minutes for them to show up.

But he got it fixed and done in good time. His car was a little bit messy, and his "nice" shirt might have been a little wrinkly for the occasion, but to see the smile on your face when you got to his car made it worth it.

"You're wearing a tie," you commented, your face full of surprise as you hopped inside

"What can I say? It was a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing," Mike replied, turning the ignition and starting the car. He looked back at you, the smile on your face making his heart flutter just as much as it had the first time he'd laid his eyes on you. "Did I, um... You look great."

You were wearing a very nice dress, something that Mike had always loved on you, and it fit you very well. It was a light pink color, with a flowy skirt and a short-sleeved top, but it complimented you so well that he wondered why he hadn't seen it on you before. It made you look stunning, in his opinion.

"Thanks," you replied. "You look pretty handsome yourself, Mikey."

Oh, how he loved that nickname. It was one of the few things that Mike loved hearing you call him, even if it was in a joking matter. It made him feel special when he heard it, like you were just so happy to be around him that it was just another way of saying so. He smiled as he pulled out of the driveway, the engine rumbling below his feet. "So, you hungry?"

"Oh, yeah," you said, "I could totally eat."

Mike smiled. "Good ‘cause I found us the most amazing Italian restaurant, and I think you'll love it,"

Mike was right, of course. You did love it. The atmosphere was perfect, and the scenery was divine, with the sun setting in the distance and the colors it created splashed across the sky. Mike had even thought ahead to get a table right next to the window to give you the perfect view. Unfortunately, the sight from the entrance was the only view you got to see.

When it got to the hostess, it turned out that they had accidentally given his reservation to a family with four kids, and you and Mike were now stuck in between a large family with several children and the bathroom. The food had already been ordered and delivered to your table, but you didn't even get a chance to start your meal before you heard the sounds of a crying baby. And when you looked up, you were faced with a crying child who seemed to be a year or so younger than Abby, sitting on the table in front of you.

You tried to ignore it at first, hoping that they would fall asleep and stop crying, but the baby didn't seem to be willing to stop any time soon, and it seemed you weren't the only one who was annoyed by it. You glanced over at Mike and you realized that he looked about one second away from punching the baby and throwing it across the restaurant.

You decided to take action before he could do that.

"How's... uh, work going?" You asked, trying to make conversation as you sat up a little bit straighter and began to wipe your fingers clean, preparing yourself for whatever came next.

Mike didn't answer, instead choosing to grunt.

You decided to try and lighten the mood just a little bit. "It can't be that bad. You're still alive."

Just as the words left your mouth, the baby started crying even louder. You looked over at the family that was sitting in front of you and noticed that none of them looked like they were planning to do anything about it. Great parenting

"That baby might not be," he grumbled, not even bothering to keep his voice down anymore. "Even Abby and her tantrums don't make me want to run into traffic, and they're on a whole other level,"

"A crying child is not going to make you run into traffic, Mike," you replied.

"It might," he argued. "I might."

You laughed, shaking your head at the man sitting in front of you. "Have you always been this dramatic?"

Mike was quiet for a moment before shrugging and letting out a sigh. His annoyance allowed you to take a look at his features for a moment, something you hadn't really done for a while. Usually, when you two hung out, he was always so busy that you didn't really get to notice the difference in expression and stance he would usually have, but now that you were finally able to look at him, you noticed a slight change in him. He looked... tired, you'd say. Tired, but at the same time, happier than he usually was. You couldn't exactly tell how he was feeling at the time, probably complete annoyance because of the crying baby, but he did look like he was smiling just a bit more than usual.

And you loved seeing it. You loved seeing him happy, even if it wasn't the happiest situation that you two could've been in. You still wanted to see his smile, and you couldn't help but smile yourself at how happy he looked when he was around you, even with all the surrounding annoyance.

"Do you remember," you began, "when we first started dating? You were so nervous, and you were scared that you were gonna mess it up, and I said to you that there was no way you could ever do that, right?"

"I mean, it's not like you were lying," he shrugged, leaning back against his chair, picking up a glass of water, and taking a small sip. "I was a mess."

"Well, you still are a mess, a hot one but still... you got over it, didn't you?" You smiled.

Mike paused for a moment, placing his glass down on the table again. He was silent before he glanced up at you. His eyes were wide, and he almost looked... stunned. He was definitely surprised.

"It's not rhetorical, Mikey, but I'm going to take that as a yes," you continued.

"That was... that was different," he said.

"Well, yeah, of course it was," you replied. "That was a few months ago. Now it's a crying baby who you believe is ruining your life,"

He rolled his eyes and sighed, clearly annoyed by the whole thing. You knew that he wasn't actually upset; however, if he were, you'd have felt him shift in his seat like he always did when he felt uncomfortable or uncomfortable. But he hadn't moved a single bit. He wasn't even fidgeting. He just sat there and kept staring at you.

Mike never said anything, though, and neither did you. You just kept staring at each other, even when the baby eventually stopped crying. For a moment, there was peace, a sort of silent bliss that you couldn't exactly explain, and then the peace was suddenly ruined again.

Mike had wanted a refill of his drink, and when the waiter returned with a pitcher and many other drinks from various tables, the serving plate somehow made its way down Mike's shirt and all over his clothes, the various liquids from water to alcohol all splattered on his clothes. And Mike? Mike didn't even flinch. He closed his eyes and sighed, gritting his teeth and tensing up a bit, and you saw that he was clenching the sides of his chair with his hands, but otherwise, he didn't make any other movements, no reaction at all. Then, to make matters worse, the baby started crying again.

Mike and you both stared at each other again, your eyes wide and your mouths slightly parted. You knew exactly how Mike was feeling, and you wanted nothing more than to do something about it, but you didn't know what to do.

"Mike, do you—" you began, feeling really bad for him.

"I need to... go to the bathroom," he interrupted you, and you nodded in response. He stood up from his seat, walked around you and the other family, and then headed towards the bathroom. You were left to sit in your seat, staring at the family in front of you as they ate and chatted amongst themselves. You didn't say anything, but you weren't exactly happy with what was happening, either.

You glanced over to the bathroom door, hoping that Mike would come out of there soon so you could ask him if he was okay, but you were unable to leave. The waiter came back a few minutes later with a towel to help Mike clean off the liquid from his clothes, and once he had it in hand, you found the strength to leave your seat and follow Mike into the bathroom.

You didn't step inside, however, instead choosing to lean against the wall by the entrance. The bathroom was a lot emptier than the restaurant was, and it seemed a lot quieter, too, the only sound that you could hear coming from the faucet by the sinks. You stared at the door for a moment, just a moment, before calling out to the man inside.

"Mike, are you okay in there?"

It took Mike a moment to respond to you. "Uh... Yeah. I'm fine."

"You don't sound fine," you replied.

"Well, I am," he replied. He sounded annoyed.

"You don't sound like it," you commented.

"Well, what do you want me to say?"

You paused for a moment, glancing around the room as you thought of a response. You decided to just tell him what was on your mind. "Do you want to leave? We can go."

You heard the bathroom door open, and Mike stepped out from it, standing in front of you, his eyes staring straight at your own. He was soaked despite all the paper towels he must've used to dry himself off. You handed him the small towel you'd been handed, and he took it from you with a small nod. He ran it through his shirt and thighs for a moment before looking at you.

"You sure?" He asked with a pinch of hesitation in his voice. He looked nervous. No, he didn't look nervous. He looked... guilty. His eyes were sad, and he seemed worried about something. He looked like he wanted to say something, but he couldn't find the right words.

You had a feeling what was going on in his mind, so you just took the lead for him. With a smile, you both returned to your seat momentarily to pay the bill and tip the waiter before making your way out to the parking lot. You climbed into the car, and Mike started the engine. He still had a very noticeable frown on his face as he turned to you.

"It looks like it's going to be a great night," he sighed, letting out a heavy sigh. His eyes shifted upwards to the clouds, and you noticed the very visible storm that was brewing in them. "Sorry. I guess I just... It didn't go the way I thought it would."

"It's still early," you replied, placing your hand over his. He looked back at you with wide eyes, clearly not expecting you to be as calm as you were. You smiled at him, squeezing his hand gently. "And I have the perfect idea of what we could do."

He raised a brow at you, his eyes suddenly looking curious. The frown was gone now and replaced with a small, barely visible smile. You had to resist the urge to hug him right then and there.

"Yeah? What is it?"

"You'll find out when we get there," you whispered and smiled, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. "Just listen to my directions. I'll be your personal navigator."

Your navigator skills were definitely off the charts that night, and even you were surprised you didn't get lost. You made some accidental wrong turns and had to double back once or twice, but other than that, you were able to get you and Mike to your destination just fine. The night sky was still covered with clouds, and there was a very faint sound of thunder in the distance, but you figured you had at least a good hour or so.

The view, though. You couldn't have picked a better spot to have. There was a tree right next to a small, grassy hill that you sat at, the only place where Mike and you could be comfortable while you stared up at the sky. You had Mike's emergency blanket, and he had his hoodie (that might have smelt like utter hell, but he refused to wear anything else after the incident earlier that night), and the stars. It was like the clouds had separated just to show you the beauty of the night sky, and the two of you were lucky enough to witness it. The sun was long gone, and the moon was peeking out from behind the clouds, its bright glow casting a shimmering reflection onto the grass below. It was a moment that you'd never forget.

"How's the date going so far now?" You asked Mike with a smile as you sat next to him. "Think this is an improvement?"

Mike shrugged. "Maybe I should stop planning the dates, and let you plan them from now on."

You smiled at him. "I like it when you plan the dates, Mike."

He frowned for a moment, but the look on his face suggested otherwise. "Really? Because there had been not one good one in the past... I dunno, two years? Even when we were still trying to work out the friendship to the relationship thing."

You shrugged, moving closer to him. "What can I say? I like the surprises, and you never were that spontaneous on your own."

"Is that what you like about me?" He asked. "My non-spontaneity?"

You glanced up at him, smiling as you took in his features again. You loved looking at him. He was handsome. And you loved the look in his eyes. They were filled with adoration, and they were looking straight into yours. He leaned down a bit and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"You have other qualities, too," you replied. “Good ones.”

"Like what?" He asked, his lips ghosting over your skin as he spoke.

"You make a great cup of coffee," you began, letting out a small giggle as he continued to kiss your forehead, moving slowly down towards your jaw. "And you're good at taking care of Abby. You can be funny if you try hard enough, and you're really cute when you smile."

Mike moved down towards your ear, gently nibbling on the lobe. His breath fanned over your skin, and you couldn't help but lean into him just a little. His hand slipped under your chin and gently pulled your head up, forcing your lips to meet with his in a soft kiss.

The first kiss was always special, in Mike's opinion. You were always so soft, so gentle, but also so firm, so loving. It was one of his favorite feelings, and he was so lucky to have you in his life, he couldn't believe it.

When you pulled away from the kiss, you didn't move too far away from him, resting your head against his shoulder instead. You closed your eyes and let out a sigh of contentment, and he leaned his head against yours, his hand resting gently on your knee as you both gazed at the moonlit sky.

"Mikey?" You asked after a moment, your voice soft and gentle as you spoke. You felt his head move in response, and you felt him take in a deep breath.

"Yeah?" He asked.

You looked up at him, smiling as you did. "I think this is our best one yet."

He didn't say anything for a moment. He stared down at you with his usual blank expression, but after a few seconds, the corners of his lips quirked up, and he was finally able to break out into a smile, one that was so much brighter than the one that he had earlier.

He kissed you again, and you couldn't help but melt into the kiss. Your hands went to his shoulders, and his hands wrapped themselves around your waist as he pulled you closer to him. You never wanted to leave his side.

You loss track of time from there. You both were lost in the moment, in the stars, in the blanket, in each other, and before either of you knew it, you felt the slight raindrops pelt against your skin, and the wind was growing stronger. Your hair whipped in front of your face, and smacked Mike in the cheek, but he didn't seem to care much, too caught up in kissing you.

You eventually pulled away, looking at the man in front of you. "We should... we should get going. You brought the umbrella, right?”

“Yeah, it’s right here," Mike nodded, grabbing it from the other end of the blanket and placing it above the two of you as the raindrops grew heavier. The thunder was louder now, but you and Mike were far too engrossed with each other to really notice it.

At least, not until tragedy struck when he went to pull up the blanket. One big strum of thunder and a burst of wind from above caused Mike to lose his grip on the umbrella, which went flying through the air and out of his grasp. You both watched it as it soared in the air, almost like you were in a daze, and then you realized the horrible thing that had happened.

The umbrella was gone. You and Mike were in the rain, and there was nothing around you to provide you any sort of protection from the downpour. The blanket was soaked within seconds, as were the two of you.

Well, technically, Mike already was.

Mike's smile had disappeared from his face when the umbrella had flown away, and now his frown had returned, only this time, it was quite humorous. He was absolutely dumbstruck, and he was just staring at the umbrella as it flew away into the night. You tried to hold back your laughter, but it was difficult, especially with the look on Mike's face.

“Great. Just great," he grumbled, grabbing your arm while making his way back towards the car. "That's just the icing on the cake."

“It’s like we’re in a rom-com," you commented as you followed him, laughing even more. "You're the oblivious man, I'm the funny girl who helps you figure out your feelings. It’s the climax of the movie, we're both drenched, and then we kiss in the rain,"

Mike glared at you, but the look was not genuine. You could tell, and it only made you laugh even more. "Yeah, yeah, let's just get to the car."

The two of you ran towards the car, and Mike jumped inside the driver's seat. You quickly got into the passenger's side before the door shut closed, and you let out a sigh of relief. You took a moment to catch your breath, and then you turned to Mike, a smile playing on your lips.

“Just so you know, those are my favorite type of rom-coms.”

Mike rolled his eyes. "And just so you know, I hate rom-coms."

You leaned over to kiss his cheek, letting out a soft giggle. "Better buckle up then, Romeo. After we find a towel and get home, we're watching the best rom-com of all time."

He rolled his eyes again, but you could tell that the small smile on his lips was genuine this time. "Let's just go before the car floods,"

You smiled, leaning back in your seat. "Sounds good, honey.”

[seat-safety-switch]

Most folks are haters. It's not their fault. A long life of being beaten down by the worst civilization has to offer has taught them to not question authority. To get in the way of anyone who might stir things up a bit. Let's just keep things calm for a while right now, and absolutely do not launch that bathtub into low earth orbit I don't care how much of a deal you got on fireworks.

When I was a kid, my mom taught me never to listen to bullies. They just want to insult things you can't change about yourself, like the way you look or how you want to start your own homemade space program. I took that to heart, which has led to all the great success we have enjoyed over the years. And now here we are, about fifty miles from the nearest urban centre, getting ready to light the fuse on several hundred pounds of low-yield explosives we looted out of that gas station dumpster, and you're getting cold feet? Maybe Mom was right about you.

Look, I did all the math. This is a stainless steel bathtub. It's not going to explode into a million flesh-shredding chunks of razor-sharp ceramic, like the normal kind. What it's going to do is launch our space probe (a Samsung Galaxy S5 with a dicky battery) directly into low earth orbit, where it will take a cool picture of some nebula or something before slowly travelling away from Earth and out of our solar system forever. Its experiences in the stellar sea will outlive us. It will be our true crowning achievement in this life. Now push the fucking button.

Damn. That was a pretty cool explosion. Absolutely no part of what I just said is going to happen. Okay, get in the Jeep®, we're going home. No, leave all this stuff. The cops are gonna be here any minute. If you thought regular folks were trying to hold us back from our goals, wait until the federales figure out we just sent a chunk of red-hot metal through the side of Old Man Wilkinson's barn. You wore gloves, right?

[anoddrock]

I feel like Rasey is really just ‘what if a dumpster fire fell in love with some really shitty fireworks’ and honestly that’s great

[incorrectbatfam]

Okay, I really wanna see the batfam's reactions to meeting Blaise

Blaise: *lights a firecracker*

Dick: Got a permit for that?

Blaise: Yeah.

Blaise: *flips him the bird*

Dick: How original.

———————

Blaise: *pours gasoline around a warehouse*

Jason: Funny, I don't remember hiring any new arsonists lately.

Blaise: Stay back or I'll blow you up with the rest of this joint.

Jason: Been dead, done that.

———————

Blaise, throwing kindling in a pile: And done.

Tim: Nice pile you got there. But how are you gonna light it up?

Blaise: With my lighter, of course!

Blaise, patting their pockets: Wait.

Tim, pulling out the lighter: Looking for this?

———————

Blaise: *buying fireworks illegally*

Damian: *also buying fireworks illegally*

Blaise and Damian: *make eye contact*

Damian: I won't tell Batman if you don't.

Blaise: Deal.

———————

Blaise, into their comms: Charges are set. Waiting for the signal.

Duke: You called?

Blaise: Oh come on! You're not even on the night shift!

Duke: I couldn't sleep. By the looks of it, neither could you. What say we grab some Batburgers and talk about it.

Blaise: Fine, but only if you pay.

———————

Blaise: *holding a handful of gunpowder*

Cullen: *walks by and sneezes*

———————

Steph, into her comms, holding a beam over her shoulder: I cleared the civilians and secured the area. I'm just removing this huge beam so Gordon can get in.

Blaise: *sneaks behind her with a lighter*

Steph, turning around and hitting them: She's helping some kids find their parents.

Blaise: *stands back up*

Steph, turning around and hitting them again: I'll stick around to gather witness statements.

———————

Blaise: *grilling hot dogs on their balcony*

Cass: *drops in*

Blaise: Woah, I don't want any trouble. I'm just making dinner.

Cass: *stands there*

Blaise: You want one?

Cass: *nods*

Blaise: *hands her a hot dog*

———————

Blaise: Excuse me, I need help finding a book.

Barbara: Sure, what's it called?

Blaise: Advanced Arson and Fire-Related Crimes.

Barbara: Is it for school?

Blaise: ...Sure.

———————

Blaise: *plants a time bomb*

Harper: *swaps it out*

Harper: *puts the real one in their bag*

Blaise: *puts the bag in their car and drives away*

———————

Blaise: *lights a candle*

Carrie: Happy birthday to me!

Carrie: *blows it out*

———————

Blaise: *kicks a flaming dumpster can at Kate*

Kate: *kicks it back*

*dumpster runs over and flattens them*

———————

Blaise: *fighting Helena*

Helena: *takes his lighter*

Helena: *lights an arrow on fire*

Helena: I'll give you a three-second head start.

Blaise: *sighs and starts running*

———————

Blaise: With this lightning rod extension, I'll ignite Wayne Tower and burn it to the ground!

Luke: That's assuming lightning even hits.

Blaise: This is the tallest thing in the city.

Luke: Yeah, but the forecast only calls for a ten percent chance of thunderstorms tonight.

Blaise: Oh. I'll just be taking this down then...

Luke: You do that.

———————

Blaise: Well, Flamebird, let's see how you do against this!

Blaise: *throws a Molotov cocktail*

Bette: *catches it*

Bette: Dude, you didn't even light it.

———————

Blaise: *steeps his tea for too long*

Alfred, halfway across the city: *wakes up in cold sweat and grabs his rifle*

———————

Blaise: *dips a bedsheet in an oil drum*

Selina: You know, black's really not your color. I see you as more of a dark brown and evergreen kind of person.

Blaise: I'm going to destroy the fashion district and take everything they have.

Selina: Cool, bring me a Versace bag.

———————

Blaise: *blows up the Batmobile*

Bruce: *pulls out adoption papers*

Blaise, who is 26 and has a family: ...

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana Mini-HCs: How the M6 adventure at midnight (Vesuvia Weekly)

Julian: truthfully, falling asleep before midnight is highly unlikely for this sleep-deprived doctor. midnight adventures consist of you crashing his study when you can't sleep to try to win him back to bed, and somehow winding up exploring the aqueducts together with a picnic basket of some cheap wine, cheese, and leftover bread

Asra: midnight is one of the few consistent parts of their schedule, being the moment when they pop awake with the munchies. and hey, if you're awake, why don't you join him? and if you're eating together, why not do it somewhere interesting? like the roof? or the Palace's roof? or floating in the middle of a lake full of the star's reflections?

Nadia: midnight is for sneaking out. as a child, it was always the hour that little children ran away from home, and as such, she believes it's the only appropriate one to make serious mischief during. you want to sneak into the field beyond the garden and set off the firework prototypes you built together? she'll put it in her planner for midnight

Muriel: he's asleep. no, seriously, he is out. he might wake up briefly if you need him for something practical, but he does not enjoy adrenaline or that feeling of being almost-in-trouble or venturing into the unknown. unless it's because the forest is doing something special. the will-o-wisps are having a ball? he might watch. a little.

Portia: this depends on three things: first, how tired she is from the day she just had, second, what she's staying up this late for, and third, what time tomorrow she has to be awake. if her energy cycles align, then you're on. she's packing a bag and going back into the catacombs to do some thousand-year-old dumpster diving, let's go!

Lucio: with life as it is right now, what part of it isn't an adventure? in this case, it looks like Lucio in an especially playful mood, you in an especially enabling mood, the dogs off chasing some poor rodent where they can't stop either of you, a tree, the pieces of his metal arm, an empty cookie jar, and an old cheesy romance novel. 'nuff said

[apoemaday]

Heart

by Dorianne Laux

The heart shifts shape of its own accord— from bird to ax, from pinwheel to budded branch. It rolls over in the chest, a brown bear groggy with winter, skips like a child at the fair, stopping in the shade of the fireworks booth, the fat lady's tent, the corn dog stand. Or the heart is an empty room where the ghosts of the dead wait, paging through magazines, licking their skinless thumbs. One gets up, walks through a door into a maze of hallways. Behind one door a roomful of orchids, behind another, the smell of burned toast. The rooms go on and on: sewing room with its squeaky treadle, its bright needles, room full of file cabinets and torn curtains, room buzzing with a thousand black flies. Or the heart closes its doors, becomes smoke, a wispy lie, curls like a worm and forgets its life, burrows into the fleshy dirt. Heart makes a wrong turn. Heart locked in its gate of thorns. Heart with its hands folded in its lap. Heart a blue skiff parting the silk of the lake. It does what it wants, takes what it needs, eats when it's hungry, sleeps when the soul shuts down. Bored, it watches movies deep into the night, stands by the window counting the streetlamps squinting out one by one. Heart with its hundred mouths open. Heart with its hundred eyes closed. Harmonica heart, heart of tinsel, heart of cement, broken teeth, redwood fence. Heart of bricks and boards, books stacked in devoted rows, their dusty spines unreadable. Heart with its hands full. Hieroglyph heart, etched deep with history's lists, things to do. Near-sighted heart. Club-footed heart. Hard-headed heart. Heart of gold, coal. Bad juju heart, singing the low down blues. Choir boy heart. Heart in a frumpy robe. Heart with its feet up reading the scores. Homeless heart, dozing, its back against the Dumpster. Cop-on-the-beat heart with its black billy club, banging on the lid.

[ronancexists]

Chaggie/Starmoth Week of Firsts

These will also be posted on my AO3 account which is the same as my Tumblr username, ronancexists :) Day 1: First Meet

Charlie had thought it to be like any other Extermination Day. She watched the portal to Heaven close from her bedroom window, set off fireworks to indicate the Extermination was officially over, and tucked some basic medical supplies into the many pockets of her red suit while the countdown on the clock tower in Pentagram City reset itself.

She politely declined Razzle and Dazzle’s offer to help her in scouring the city, searching for sinners who had been injured during the Extermination. She rarely found anybody alive, but she continued going out there, year after year. And those she did find still alive, they never actually accepted her assistance.

Despite the fact that they didn’t want her help, they were still her people, and she knew somewhere, deep inside all of them, were people who cared, who were kind, who wanted to accept her help, but wouldn’t because they were too prideful or too ashamed.

Whatever the case was, Charlie wanted to do this. She was tired of seeing sinners perish due to the Exorcists that came down to “cleanse” Hell in order to deal with the realm’s overpopulation problem.

Charlie knew there had to be another way, a more humane way, to deal with the overpopulation of Hell. She had an idea, but she didn’t exactly have a lot of support when it came to said idea. Her own father didn’t believe in her, her mother had disappeared almost four years ago and hadn’t returned any of Charlie’s calls or responded to any of her messages, and anybody she tried to explain it to laughed in her face and told her it was never going to work and that she should quit while she was ahead.

But she wasn’t going to let any of that stop her. This idea she had, a hotel to redeem sinners, was something she was passionate about and something she believed in with every fiber of her being. There were still a lot of kinks she had to work out in terms of making the hotel a reality, but Charlie was nothing if not determined. She’d open the hotel, recruit sinners to stay and work there, and they would be redeemed to Heaven, where everyone would live happily ever after.

Charlie was brought of her thoughts when she heard someone groaning. She looked around the street she had been walking on, confused as to where that noise could have come from. All the people around her were occupied with trying to find their family members or friends, stealing, picking fights for territory, all the usual things.

She heard it again, and this time, Charlie focused on that noise and that noise alone. She walked further down the street, pausing when she noticed a darkened alleyway. She cautiously entered the alleyway, only to throw it out the window when she saw a figure propped up against the dumpster.

Charlie raced over, a hand hovering over her mouth as she gasped in surprise at the woman, who by the looks of it was about to pass out until Charlie had approached. She was squinting up at Charlie through a singular eye as the Princess approached her.

Charlie hastily crouched down on the brimstone in front of her, digging through her pocket until she found a roll of gauze.

The woman stared at Charlie in apprehension, bracing herself against the dumpster she was leaning against as Charlie reached for her face.

Charlie wrapped the gauze around the woman’s head and empty eye socket, pulling her hands away the instant she was done so as not to frighten her anymore than she already was.

A fuzzy feeling spread through Charlie as the white-haired woman stared at her in surprise before she gave her a grateful, albeit hesitant and small, smile. Charlie tucked her hair behind her ear self-consciously, looking back at the woman with her own, slightly flustered, smile.

“Thank you,” the woman said, still looking at Charlie, with an expression the Princess couldn’t quite read.

“Of course! I’m so sorry this happened to you,” Charlie replied, a saddened expression gracing her face as she studied the woman.

“It’s…it was my fault, really.”

Charlie shook her head viciously. “Don’t say that! This is absolutely not your fault. Nobody deserves this, no matter what they’ve done in their previous life.”

The woman bit her lip and went to shift positions, only to cry out when the motion caused pain to shoot up and down her back from the rubbing of her wounds between the material of her dress and the surface of the dumpster.

“Oh my gosh! I didn’t realize you were hurt elsewhere! Here, let me help you,” Charlie said, leaning down to wrap an arm around the woman’s waist, assisting her to her feet and holding onto her waist to support her, seeing as she was hurt and could barely stand on her own. She then noticed the woman was shivering, and without a thought, shrugged off her suit jacket and draped it across the other woman’s shoulders, amusement sparkling in her eyes as the article of clothing practically swallowed the shorter woman whole. “What else did they do to you?”

The two of them were now making their way down the street, the other woman glaring at any sinner who dared to look at them despite being as injured as she was. It made her feel better, less exposed, to the world of Hell and its denizens. Charlie’s jacket was also helping with that, and she fought the urge to press her nose against it and take in a deeper whiff of Charlie’s pleasant apple scent that was radiating warmth and comfort and safety.

“They, uhh, well, they wanted to make sure I couldn’t run from them,” she replied.

Charlie growled, a sound that surprised both women, and she unconsciously tightened the hold she had on the mysterious woman’s waist. “I’m really sorry they did that. They aren’t normally that cruel. I’m surprised you’re still alive, if I’m being honest.”

She let out a humorless chuckle. “I am too. Guess they thought I’d die quickly with the injuries. I didn’t count on anyone finding me, and I suppose they didn’t either.”

Charlie hummed in acknowledgement. “That makes a lot of sense, actually. I certainly wouldn’t have found you if I hadn’t heard you making noise.”

“Well, I’m glad you did.”

Charlie did her best to ignore the blush rising to her cheeks. She had just found this woman, terribly injured, and she was already making her feel butterflies? No, Charlie refused. Now was a very bad time for her to be developing a crush, thank you very much. Plus, she didn’t even know her name! Wait, what? “Ohhhhhhh, I’m so so so sorry! I didn’t even think to ask what your name was! I was so worried about your injuries I forgot to ask the most basic question ever! I promise I’m not usually this forgetful, I just—”

“It’s fine, really,” the woman interrupted, trying to placate the demon who looked so crushed at the idea of having forgotten to ask her name. “It’s Vaggie. My name is Vaggie.”

A blinding smile overcame Charlie’s face. “It’s nice to meet you, Vaggie, despite the circumstances. I’ve never heard a name like that. It’s pretty.”

“It’s nice to meet you too, Charlie. Thanks again, for helping me. I know a lot of people down here would have just left me there to die,” Vaggie answered with a light blush, though that quickly gave way to her wincing in pain and discomfort with every step they took.

“You don’t have to thank me. You’re actually the first person to accept my help. I come out here after every Extermination, and nobody ever wants to take me up on my offer. I try to do what I can, but I guess when you’re the Princess of Hell, people sort of resent you for being excluded from the Exterminations.”

Vaggie blinked. And blinked again. And again. “...you’re—you’re the—you’re Lucifer’s daughter?!”

Charlie shrugged, a sheepish expression on her face. “Ummm, surprise…?”

Vaggie shook her head in disbelief, instantly regretting the decision as it worsened the steady aching in her head. “I can’t believe the Princess of Hell is helping me.”

“I’m helping a fellow citizen of Pentagram City who needs it. That’s all I want to do. I want to help my people, and this is one of the only ways I know how,” Charlie revealed, looking down at Vaggie nervously. She wanted to impress Vaggie, despite having just met the woman.

“I think that’s real noble of you, Charlie,” Vaggie said, picking her head up to meet the blonde’s gaze head on. Her heart was fluttering like a butterfly in her chest and her stomach felt like it was in knots, and she liked the feeling of Charlie’s arm around her waist and the warmth that seeped from her palm into her own skin. She did her best to shove those feelings deep down inside.

Charlie had just saved her, and from the looks of it, she’d be staying with the demon for an indefinite amount of time based on her injuries. Vaggie had time to get to know her. For now, she was just going to focus on her recovery. Everything else could be figured out later.

“Thank you. Nobody really has faith in me or what I want to do. I can tell you more about it later, if you want. For now, I’d like to welcome you to my humble abode,” Charlie announced, gesturing to the building that was resting atop the hill.

“It’s a palace,” Vaggie said in awe, only to wonder why she was acting surprised in the first place if she already knew Charlie was the Princess of Hell.

“Yeah,” Charlie said, scratching the back of her neck with her unoccupied hand rather abashedly. “I know it’s a lot. It can even be a lot for me, at times. You don’t have to worry about running into my dad, considering all he does is stay in his room all day, everyday. He’s been a wreck and in a slump ever since my mom left a couple of years ago. It was hard, for both of us, but he practically gave up on everything when she left. On being the King of Hell, on running his businesses, on living. Even on me.”

Vaggie took note of the way Charlie spoke about her dad, a mix of resentment, sadness, and fear, most likely for his livelihood.

“Sorry, I tend to ramble a lot. Feel free to stop me whenever it gets to be too much.”

“It’s ok, I like the rambling. It’s cute.”

Vaggie squeezed her eye shut as she wondered what possessed her to say such a thing. Especially to Charlie, the literal Princess and someone she had met not that long ago. And by shutting her eye and mentally berating herself, she missed the pleased smile and red flush Charlie was sporting.

“So, umm, this is my home!” Charlie squeaked out when she managed to regain some sort of motor function. “I’ll give you a tour later. I want to check on your wounds, make sure there’s no infection or anything of the sort.”

“Yeah, ok,” Vaggie agreed, allowing Charlie to take the lead seeing as she had no fucking clue about anything. All she knew was that the pain was becoming harder and harder to breathe through, and it was getting harder and harder to keep her eye open.

“Woah,” Charlie said as Vaggie unexpectedly began leaning heavily into her side. She looked over at her, and seeing that Vaggie was struggling to keep herself awake, Charlie scooped Vaggie up and began carrying her down the hall bridal style.

They reached Charlie’s bedroom a few short moments later, and Charlie burst into the room, startling Razzle and Dazzle, who had been napping on the bottom of her bed. The two goats went over to greet Charlie, only to stop in their tracks at the sight of the battered woman in Charlie’s arms.

Exchanging nods with one another, they set off. Dazzle grabbed a bowl of warm water mixed with soap and the first aid kit from the bathroom while Razzle searched for some washcloths to use for Vaggie’s wounds, along with spare towels to place on the bed so Charlie’s sheets wouldn’t get dirty.

“Thanks, boys,” Charlie said as they approached with the supplies. “Vaggie, I’m gonna set you down now,” the blonde warned once Razzle and Dazzle had finished placing the towels down.

“Mmhmm,” Vaggie murmured, whimpering and trying to clutch onto Charlie as the other woman set her down.

“I know, I’m sorry,” Charlie whispered. “I need to take your clothes off to get to your back. Is that ok?”

Vaggie gave a jerky nod, so Charlie reached forward and made quick work of disposing Vaggie of her own suit jacket and the dress, blushing when she realized Vaggie was now sporting nothing but a tiny pair of shorts, socks, and a bra. She shook her head to rid herself of those thoughts. Now is not the time, Charlie, she scolded herself.

Charlie finally got a good look at Vaggie’s back, and the anger from before came back even stronger. She could clearly see where the Exorcists had dug their blades into Vaggie’s back by the two large, vertical, symmetrical gashes. She couldn’t spot any blood, which was a good sign. What she could spot, however, was a lot of red, slightly inflamed skin, which wasn’t so good. “Ok, umm, I’m going to need to clean these and it’s probably going to hurt. I can give you something to numb the area, but it’s going to take a bit to set in.”

Vaggie sucked in a deep breath, groaning when that made the muscles in her back shift and made what felt like fire shoot through her body. “Do what you need to do. Just, make it quick.”

“Alright.”

Charlie took a couple of breaths to steady her slightly shaky hands. She’s seen a lot of things in Hell, but somehow, this was more gruesome than all of those combined. She gently rubbed some numbing cream around Vaggie’s back, apologizing and murmuring words of comfort with every pained noise that escaped Vaggie. She wiped her hands off with a towel and waited for a few minutes to give it some time to set in. Once that was done, she dunked a washcloth into the combination of soap and water, wringing it out as best she could. Before she could think too much about it, Charlie brought it to the scar on the left and began cleaning.

“Fuck!” Vaggie screamed, voice muffled due to the fact her face was buried in a mountain of pillows, fists clenching the sheets to keep herself from grabbing Charlie and begging her to stop, stars dancing in front of her eyes as she fought the urge to pass out right there on the spot.

“I’m sorry,” Charlie said, eyes laser-focused on the task at hand so she could get it done as thoroughly and quickly as possible. “I know, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

Vaggie hated this. She hated herself for getting caught by Lute. She hated Lute for doing this for her. She hated Adam for standing by and doing nothing. She hated how weak and vulnerable she was right now. She hated that she was in the place she had been fighting against for so long. She hated that she was almost going to start crying in front of a complete stranger. In front of a demon.

And not just any demon.

The Princess of Hell.

Daughter of Lilith and Lucifer.

The two most hated beings in Heaven.

Though it was mainly Lucifer. After all, he had been an Angel. He had been one of them.

He was used as an example to keep all other Angels in line. To keep them from going against Heaven, to keep them from questioning.

Yet Vaggie, despite all the warnings and all the teachings, had.

She had questioned.

She had hesitated.

And she ended up exactly like Lucifer.

Fallen.

She no longer had a place in Heaven.

These thoughts, combined with the sheer agony wracking her body with everything Charlie was doing, to try and help her, only made her pain feel worse.

Because Charlie was a demon.

She was the heir to the throne.

She should be the worst of them all.

But she wasn’t.

She was sweet. Polite. Kind.

She was kinder to Vaggie than anybody in Heaven had ever been.

Due to the fact that Vaggie was an Exorcist, she never got much of a chance to explore Heaven, and in turn, meet other people that resided in Heaven. Only the Exorcists were allowed to know about the Exterminations, which meant most of the time, they were kept separate lest somebody find out about their training.

When they did have a chance to interact with the other citizens of Heaven, it was never something Vaggie was interested in. She already had trouble fitting in with her fellow Exorcists, so she didn’t really bother trying to fit in with the rest of Heaven.

The guilt, the shame, that she wasn’t supposed to feel about being an Exterminator, made her feel like she wasn’t worthy of hanging out with Angels. Like she wasn’t worthy of being in Heaven.

Nobody ever tried to reach out to Vaggie either, so after a while, she began keeping to herself. She slept, she woke, she trained, she ate, she went home, she showered, she slept, then did it all again the next day, and the next, and the next, and the next, all the while feeling like she was an outcast.

Now, she actually was an outcast. And the idea that she was no longer an Angel, no longer worthy of Heaven, stung, much deeper than Vaggie was willing to admit at the moment.

Because if she wasn’t worthy of Heaven, then what was the point of her?

“I’m almost done. You’re doing really good, Vaggie. Just a little while longer and you’ll be good to rest for the night,” Charlie said, having moved on from cleaning with the soap and water washcloth to applying a healing salve to the wounds. That didn’t take too long, which meant she could get to work on covering them up with some non-stick gauze and medical tape.

“What’s with the goats?” Vaggie asked, her voice raspy from misuse.

“That’s Razzle and Dazzle. I’ve had them since I was a kid. We’ve been inseparable ever since. They’re a part of our family,” Charlie explained.

Hearing their names, the two goats flew over to Charlie’s side, and when she waved her hand at them, they moved up the side of the bed until Vaggie could see them.

“Ummm, hi?”

Razzle looked at Dazzle, and Dazzle shrugged at his brother. They looked at Vaggie with slightly narrowed eyes, as if they were unsure of whether or not they could trust her.

“It’s, uhhh, nice to meet you guys, I guess.”

Charlie giggled at how awkward Vaggie was being around the two. “They don’t bite.”

“I dunno, I just, I’ve never really been around animals,” Vaggie muttered.

Charlie frowned. She couldn’t even begin to fathom how she’d survive without either of them by her side.

Sensing her rising distress, Razzle and Dazzle went back over to Charlie, Razzle headbutting her affectionately while Dazzle nuzzled himself under her arm. She grinned at them, pressing a couple kisses each to the tops of their heads.

“So, am I good?”

Charlie jumped in surprise, blushing at Vaggie’s small smirk. “Yes, yeah, totally! I’m all done.”

Vaggie slowly lifted herself up off the bed, groaning with every movement of her back. When she finally managed to sit herself up, legs dangling off the bed, she looked over at Charlie, who had clearly been fighting against the urge to help Vaggie sit herself up if her hands hovering in mid-air were any indication. “Thank you, again, Charlie. Really, I can’t thank you enough for all this.”

Charlie blushed, waving off Vaggie’s gratitude. “It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. Not to me,” Vaggie argued, her singular white eye locking with Charlie’s two brilliant red eyes.

Razzle and Dazzle looked between the two of them, then at each other, then between the two of them, wondering who was going to be the first to break the tension simmering in the air.

The answer was Vaggie’s stomach.

Charlie giggled again, hand covering her mouth as her eyes widened in surprise at herself even as she continued giggling.

Vaggie smiled even as she crossed her arms over her stomach self-consciously, belatedly realizing she wasn’t wearing anything on her upper body except for her gray bra. “Uhhh, Charlie?”

“Hmmm?”

“You wouldn’t happen to have a shirt or something I could borrow, do you?”

Charlie looked at Vaggie in confusion, eyes traveling down her body, swallowing thickly at how well the slate-gray bra suited Vaggie. Realizing she was staring, she snapped her eyes back up to Vaggie’s face, breathing a quiet sigh of relief as Vaggie’s attention wasn’t on her, but on Razzle and Dazzle, who she was petting with a look of awe.

That fuzzy feeling washed over Charlie again, making her dizzy and breathless and her heart flip and her mouth dry and her stomach tie itself up in knots. She watched with a fond, soft smile as the boys flew around Vaggie in circles, headbutting her and bleating at her.

“What are they saying?” Vaggie inquired, looking at Charlie with an expression so earnest and childlike Charlie wanted nothing more than to hug her and never let go.

Instead, she cleared her throat and answered Vaggie’s question. “They want to know if they can help you with anything.”

Vaggie’s stomach growled again, making Vaggie blush and Charlie sway as she stood up.

“Right!” she squeaked out. “I’m gonna gayyyago! Goooo grab you a shirt! Out of the closet! Yes siree, that’s where I’ll be!”

“Ok, thanks,” Vaggie said, watching in poorly hidden amusement as Charlie kept tripping over her feet as she raced over to her closet. “Is she always like this?”

Razzle and Dazzle both looked at her with raised eyebrows and tilted heads. What do you think?, they were asking without any actual words.

“Got it,” Vaggie said to herself, taking the opportunity to look around the room.

The bed itself was massive and took up a good chunk of the room, stacked with more pillows and blankets than one person could ever need. Curtains were draped across either side to give a modicum of privacy, though they were tied back at the moment.

The side of the bed Vaggie was on had a nightstand, filled to the brim with little knickknacks, including a rubber duck with a white tophat and vest, and three photos. One was of a very little, abundantly excited Charlie as she hugged Razzle and Dazzle, who didn’t look to be much smaller than they currently were. Another was of Charlie at her birthday party, surrounded by what Vaggie vaguely recognized were all of the Sins. The last was of Charlie, who looked to be around the age she was now, situated between a man and a woman, clearly her parents by how much Vaggie could identify Charlie in both of them.

So that’s Lucifer and Lilith, Vaggie thought, chuckling to herself as she realized how short he was in comparison to both Lilith and Charlie. He had the same skin tone as Charlie, sported the same two red circles on his face, and emanated the same excitement and passion Charlie possessed just through his large, sharp-toothed smile.

Lilith gave off a much more regal and demonic vibe than Lucifer. She wasn’t smiling so much as she was smirking, the crown atop her head mimicking the shape of her horns. Charlie inherited those same black lips, and despite both Lucifer and Lilith having blonde hair, Vaggie suspected it came from Lilith. She could tell because both Lilith and Charlie had multiple lighter streaks of blonde with the regular blonde, and Lucifer had streaks, but he only had one streak of lighter blonde at the front.

Vaggie finally tore her gaze away, humming as she studied the rest of the room. There wasn’t much else. A few more pictures of Charlie throughout her childhood were scattered on the walls, a dresser and vanity mirror across from the bed. On the same side of the room as the nightstand was the door Charlie disappeared into, meaning that was her closet. A few feet down was another door that Vaggie suspected was the bathroom.

The entire room was in different shades of red, violet, and pink. And everything, from the floor to the furniture to the ceiling, had some sort of emblem on it. The most common patterns she could spot were apples, snakes, and ducks. An odd combination, but Vaggie had seen weirder.

“I’ve got it!” Charlie proclaimed as she finally emerged from the closet. It hadn’t taken her long to find the shirt she had in mind at all, but she’d needed some time to cool the fuck down after what had happened. Mainly, her blatant staring from Vaggie’s delectable throat, her sharp collarbones, the tops of her breasts, her nipples poking through the fabric of the bra, all the way down to the vast, smooth expanse of her stomach. She frantically fought the blush that was forming at the image that was now imprinted in her mind, thrusting the shirt out in Vaggie’s direction. “Here ya go! One shirt, as promised!”

Vaggie slowly rose to her feet, grabbing the shirt from Charlie’s outstretched hand. She put it on carefully, every move she made aggravating her injuries further. She bit her lip to stifle her groans of pain, dropping her arms to her sides in relief once she’d managed to get the shirt over her head. She tugged on the hem to pull it outwards, tilting her head at the little red spots that decorated the black shirt. “Apples?”

Charlie smiled sheepishly at Vaggie, tucking her hair behind her ear. “It’s kind of a family thing.”

Vaggie snorted when she realized what Charlie meant.

“Sooooo, now that we’ve got that out of the way, would you care for some food? Something to drink? A painkiller?”

“Is all of the above an option?”

“Sure thing. Wait here, I’ll be back in a jiff,” Charlie instructed, jogging out of the room and into the hall, leaving Vaggie with Razzle and Dazzle.

Vaggie took a step, only to stumble as soon as she did so, thanking Razzle and Dazzle breathlessly as they caught her, Razzle on her left and Dazzle on her right. “Thank you. Do you mind helping me to the bathroom? “I want to—I want to look at my eye—where it used…” she trailed off, swallowing past the lump in her throat.

Vaggie couldn’t bring herself to finish her sentence. Luckily for her, the two goat demons didn’t need any more of an explanation. They assisted her to the bathroom, and once Vaggie had settled in there, they exited and shut the door behind them.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Clenching her teeth, she reached up and unwrapped the gauze Charlie had delicately applied. She let it fall off and into the sink, knuckles white from how hard she was gripping the edges of the counter as she stared at herself.

Vaggie didn’t know what she was expecting, but an empty eye socket, a black void, was somehow worse. It meant her eye was really gone, that there was no hope of her ever going back to the way she was.

Despite the rising anger, the sadness bubbling up inside of her, the fear that was festering from being in the very place she’d been warned about and fighting against, she refused to let the dam break. She closed her eye, took deep, slow breaths, and exhaled until the tension finally began to seep.

Once she had calmed herself down, she turned the water on in the sink and let it warm up a bit before carefully washing her face to get rid of the dirt and grime, dabbing it clean with the hand towel before wrapping her eye—where her eye used to be back up with the gauze. She then washed her hands, and rummaged through the cabinets for a brush. It didn’t take long for her to neaten her hair back up, and when that was done, she slowly made her way over the door, leaning against it for support as she opened it.

“There you are! I was worried the soup was going to get cold with how long you were taking in there,” Charlie teased as she walked over to Vaggie, offering her support to the woman, which she accepted with a grateful nod.

There was a tray being balanced between Razzle and Dazzle, filled with two bowls of soup, two glasses of water, silverware, napkins, and painkillers. Charlie helped Vaggie get settled on the bed, then clambered on in next to her, thanking the boys as they placed the try between the two of them.

“Thank you,” Vaggie said quietly, hand trembling as she lifted her first spoonful of soup to her mouth.

“I’m going to make it my personal mission to get you to stop thanking me, but for now, you’re welcome,” Charlie said, watching Vaggie as she ate her own soup to ensure she didn’t need any help. Despite how injured she was, she seemed to be doing alright as she could be, which made Charlie feel a bit better about everything. “What do you say we have a movie night after we’re done? Movies and ice cream with friends always makes things better. At least it does in my opinion.”

Vaggie blinked confusedly. “Friends?”

Charlie nodded, tucking her hair behind her ear self-consciously. “I mean, unless you don’t want to be. I’m sorry for assuming, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable or anything.”

“No, I, uhh, it’s fine, really. I’d like to. Be friends, I mean.”

Charlie grinned a wide grin. “Awesome! So, what kind of movies do you like? I like all kinds, but especially musicals! The songs are always so fun to sing along to and the plots are—"

Vaggie felt herself becoming more and more relaxed as Charlie babbled about musicals and which ones were her favorites. And as she watched Charlie, a warm, fuzzy feeling swept through her.

Friends, she thought to herself. Yeah, I think I can do that.

Thank you for reading! P.S.: here's the AO3 link

[mintyisms]

Call Me Kevin Starters

taken from various youtube videos

"Would I take candy from a child? No, but only because I don't like candy."

"I can either trade them or rob them. Probably both."

"We're neighbors. We're going to have to learn to respect each other."

"My fear of the dark outweighs my fear of prickly things."

"This is the second scariest stage play I've ever seen, the first being Shrek: The Musical."

"I just thought I'd start running to see if you followed me or not."

"So this is what it feels like to be at the top. Funny enough, it feels just like being at the bottom."

"We're not really here to do a cool fireworks show. We're here to commit acts of terrorism."

"I think I just committed insurance fraud."

"I can't promise I'll come back for you."

"I'm definitely burning this place down."

"I can't read maps. I can barely read in general."

"It's nice to meet you. I like your fashion sense."

"I'm not an arsonist. I'm a property developer."

"So many buildings on fire, and I didn't even start them this time."

"Looks like something out of High School Musical, not that I would know."

"I hate when large corporations suffer copyright infringement. It pisses me off!"

"Who's screaming? Is it me? It might be me."

"I'm just going to try pressing all the buttons and see if that works."

"The secret to victory is falling over at the starting line."

"That's going right into the old repressed memories folder."

"Being clothes-less and hairless pays off."

"I don't like wet food and soup is the wettest of foods."

"I need to bash your head in, if you don't mind."

"They don't have a bathroom tv? What peasants!"

"Don't tell on me or otherwise I WILL steal your television."

"Why are you not laughing? Humor is all I bring to the table."

"Don't worry, my favorite dumpster is nearby."

"When the government comes for me, I'll just launch a coup."

"He's called 'The Werewolf'. Why would I trust him for financial advice?"

"The wall growled at me and I got scared."

"I think something traumatic is about to happen to me."

[pulim-v]

Mist hair tie symbolism? I vaguely remember hair ties being mentioned but don't remember the post (I'll probably remember it completely if I find the post so I'll know what you mean then but I can't find it through Tumblr search because Tumblr search esp on mobile is a dumpster fire mascaurading as a fireworks show)

Also there's rambling involved? Then I MUST hear

I don't *think* I've laid it out explicitly yet, but basically:

Mist's hair can't be too long without being tied, because that's a safety hazard

He would prefer to have it short, but he doesn't have the time to go get a haircut, so he just keeps it in a bun

As time goes on, and as he allows himself less and less time for rest, his hair gets so tangled that he physically cannot remove his hair tie

At a later point in the story, he, after actual physical pain, manages to either cut or at least untie his hair (haven't fully decided on which it is)

So that's the literal way the events go, but imo this is just a bit of a synopsis of Mist's character: he's so wrapped up in the concept of being perfect 100% of the time, and always giving it his all, and always working, that he has no time for self-care, and actually resting becomes difficult, if not straight-up painful for him. Only through being forcibly removed from his work and being told to rest by several different people can he slowly and painstakingly untangle the mess he created for himself, but it's only so painful because he didn't do so earlier.

After his character arc, I think he still has his hair on a bun when he's Doing Lab Stuff, but I also think he lets his hair down most of the time outside of it, he lets himself not be in Work Mode at least for some time

This is also contrasted with Spark, who has similarly long hair, but they instead always have it down because they can't care about the same regulations Mist is obsessed with (and later on they learn to tie their hair sometimes because they start to be more strict with themself)

[seat-safety-switch]

My house is on the migratory route for ducks. Every fall, and every spring, there's a bunch of noisy ducks flapping over my home, quacking their nightmare noises. There's poop, sure, but the bigger problem is all the lost sleep. Quack, quack, quack, all night long.

At first, I figured I would be a good global citizen about it. We're all part of the same ecosystem, and ducks have just as much of a right to be here as anyone else. As you have been trained to do with so many other things in today's world, I put up with it. I bought noise-cancelling headphones, I set up a noise-cancelling fan, and I hired a guy to play the cymbals all night in my backyard to scare them away. Nothing doing: it turns out the sound of cymbals crashing makes ducks extremely horny, and I had to find a new cymbal player, plus also settle with the old one in court for his (valid, but disgusting) workman's injury claims.

The next tactic was simple redirection. I put a kiddie pool in the dog park down the hill, filled it with water, and left a few loaves of dumpster-dove bread out to attract the fowl. This seemed like it would work great, until I remembered that the ducks are generally bright enough not to fall for a trap that involves getting eaten by dozens of hungry Schnauzers. Two-nothing, then.

Ultimately, I hit upon the right solution while doing something else entirely. There's a very expensive lake community a few minutes away from my house, and while I was there raiding their dumpsters, I noticed that there was a perfectly good pedal-driven swan boat in the trash. Some kids had set off some fireworks in it, so it was a little singed in places and melted in others, and surely no longer watertight. What it did have, though, was duckness.

With help from a gas-powered go-kart frame, a GPS unit from one of the self-driving delivery robots that I "accidentally" struck with my car to receive free burritos from, and about four nights of banging on it with a wrench, I soon had a duck decoy of a whole new kind. It worked better than I ever could have imagined, luring the ducks away from their prescribed flight path and directly onto the highway.

There's just one flaw: the go-kart ran out of gas about an hour into the trip. I went to go get it back, because I'll need it for the fall, but a protective swarm of vicious waterfowl surround their wounded-but-huge brethren at all times. It just goes to show you that electric cars are the future. If I had solar-powered this sucker instead, I bet I could have run it on the interstate for like a day or two before the accumulated poop blocked out the light.

[world-of-wales]

I was looking into where COP is going it be hosted because it can tie in to earthshot, and of course Brazil is next year. COP31 (2026) is likely to be in Australia which is also a strong contender for earthshot, India is bidding for COP33 in 2028….

My reasoning on a potential Indian Earthshot is below this.

India better stay away from cop33 & Earthshot, especially after their latest 'achievements' in the conservation sector. The govt is fantastic in making bold claims but in reality, can't do shit. And I for one don't want william anywhere near that dumpster fire of hypocrites.

There's so many examples of their sheer incompetence, there's a polluted river in india - yamuna. Between 2017 - 2021 (or 22) I believe more than ₹6,800 crores of taxpayer money was spent on cleaning that death trap and it still is as dirty as it was when all this first began. There's actual toxic foam of ammonia and phosphates that floats around it 24/7.

Then just this week news came out that 25 Tigers, (which are an endangered species btw and also part of a very ambitious conservation project 'Project Tiger' started in 1973) have been untraceable from a state run national park for the past year. The only reason this came out was because another tiger was found dead from that forest.

And just yesterday, it came out that 10 elephants died in another state run park last month because they were fed...fungal infected millets.

Heck, Delhi? The capital? It's consistently been one of the most polluted cities of the world for years. It's a literal gas chamber, which gets the worst around the current time coz of various issues. Now diwali falls around this time and because of the air quality, the Indian supreme court banned any sort of crackers/fireworks to be burnt in the area? Sounds amazing right? But guess what since crackers have come to be associated with Diwali which is a hindu festival. So the members of the ruling party within their agenda have turned this ban into an attack on religion and consistently provoke their supporters on this ground urging them to burn crackers and make delhi insufferable for all.

This is just 4 examples, there's so many that if I start listing them, we'll be here for a long time.

Moreover, the current ruling party will only twist the visit to fill into their own agenda of hate mongering & political capital as they have been known to do with every such visit.

Also the govt quite literally cordoned off low income neighborhoods that fell on route of the attendees in Delhi with plastic barriers and police personnel during the G20 in 2023, to make sure no world leader saw anything other than the rosy picture they were putting out.

Now imagine what would happen in case of something like COP33. Ofc they would do similar repulsive things then also and imagine how harmful being attached to something like this with a potential Earthshot will be for William and his public image!

I would love for him to come here, Earthshot is such a fabulous initiative, and there's such a booming environmental startup sector in India like Phool (I personally am aware of their situation. My mum's cousin runs a marketing firm and she's the one who handles everything for them, and she's told me so much about how Earthshot has helped them since 2022 with linking them to investors, other similar businesses, exposure etc) or Kheyti etc etc which deserve to be highlighted.

But in the past 10 years buisness and government have become so intrinsically linked in india that no matter what the ruling party will hijack the contributions of these organizations like they do.

So yeah maybe I'm being a narrow minded idiot but Earthshot in India rn? Will only lead to credibility issues.

Now let's hope I don't go to jail for putting all this here by exercising my fundamental right under Article 19(1)(a).

[catindabag]

Can you make oc’s based off your Au? :)

Well, sure! That’s not an issue. Besides, there’s already a lot of original characters running around and causing havoc/chaos in my crazy TBOSAS on Crack!AU.

I mean, we already have:

Peacekeeper Joe (AKA: Officer Jovilius who wants to quit his job because of the Mentors’ nonstop shenanigans)

The poor pizza delivery guy (AKA: Pizza Pertinax of the Pizza Palace)

Mad Uncle Achilles Ravinstill (He’s the youngest son of President Ravinstill who got arrested for smuggling illegal fireworks)

The “sacred” Bichon Frisé puppies (AKA: the real leaders of Panem)

Mama Monty and her deadly apple pies (She’s a real nightmare national treasure and an infamous “war hero” of Panem)

Mama Cardew (AKA: The Capitol’s scariest and deadliest entity to ever exist)

Mommy Anderson (She’s the one who blackmails people for a living)

Mommy Anderson’s underpaid camera crew (No comment)

Vice President Aurelia Ravinstill (She’s Felix Ravinstill’s mom who’s allergic to charity, poor people, and homeless Hilari)

Elmer Coin (the current Mole President of District 13)

Poor Aeneas Crane (The unfortunate older brother of Arachne Crane who sleeps in a tiny doghouse)

Little Plotinus Heavensbee (the favored and “perfect” younger brother of homeless Hilarius Heavensbee)

Creepy Mr. Heavensbee Sr. (No comment)

Freaky Mrs. Heavensbee (No comment)

Festus Creed’s mom (The current ✨Queen of Neglect✨)

Festus Creed’s dumpster (Darling Demeter the Dumpster)

Festus Creed’s freaky pet rats (Odysseus and Penelope)

Tigris Snow’s cheese fairies

Coryo Snow’s cabbage deities

Coryo Snow’s lima bean elves

Clemensia’s hamster (Hercules)

Gaius Breen’s possum (Patroclus)

Domitia’s emotional support cow (Lady Claudia)

Dean Casca Highbottom’s goldfish (Venus)

Hilarius Heavensbee’s crusty chihuahua (Caracalla)

Domitia’s father’s emotional support cow (Lord Claudius/the real Mayor of D10)

Dennis Fling’s doctor (Quack Dr. Majorian who works at the Capitol Black Market)

Great great grandfather Vipsanius Cornelius Felix Ravinstill (He’s the man who married off his 24 beautiful daughters and 16 sons to every single Capitol Noble House in order to make the ultimate/craziest/most complicated ✨Royal Family Tree✨)

Don’t worry. There will be more weird original characters popping here and there as the story continues. Lol.