#the doctor isn’t turned
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still pondering the spy/doc/clara vampire lord AU I’ve been spinning around my head since 2022.
#it’s mostly built on canon#the doctor isn’t turned#but the master and clara are#doctor who#thirteenth doctor#the master#dhawan master#clara oswald#spydoc#thoschei#spyclara#thirteenclara#soufflaker
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It is interesting how fandom understands that Rose influenced the Doctor to heal after the Time War and that she changed him for the better, but when it comes to how Rose shouldered the trauma of a veteran who came out of an incomprehensibly horrific war and how the first place that veteran takes her is to see her own planet get destroyed and how later she stands between that veteran holding a gun and a Dalek (she even has dialogue explicitly pointing out that the Doctor is the one who is pointing a gun at her), nobody in the fandom thinks about how any of that would have influenced and changed Rose.
It’s all why is s2 Rose different from s1 Rose? instead. And I think there’s an answer for why she’s different right in front of you.
#doctor who#rose tyler#it’s like fandom expects companions to never be changed by the doctor#everything is about how everything and everyone influences and changes the doctor#while companions aren’t recognized as having character arcs of their own unless it’s to talk about how they’ve turned into the doctor#rose isn’t the only one by far when it comes to this#it seems to be a tendency of dw fandom to expect companions to just be static#in a show that is about change it’s rather telling that fandom thinks the only one who’s allowed to change is the doctor
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#everytime i listen to this song i just see them so i figured why not edit it#doctor who#dw#twelfth doctor#twelveclara#whoffaldi#clara oswald#mine#edits#clara#twelve#clara oswin oswald#hozier#yada yada#clara says people turn into songs#orpheus spent the rest of his time without her turning eurydice into songs to try and feel her again#hm… just like a certain doctor…#there are so many parallels it kills me#12clara#doctorwho#green mythology#greek myth#tbh name a hozier song that isn’t them coded#work song? francesca? jackie and wilson?#all twelveclara coded#12th doctor#clara oswin#peter capaldi#jenna coleman#twelve and clara
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every new episode makes the headcannon that 14 and Donna are just chilling somewhere so much funnier.
Donna and 14 being suspiciously absent for years when everybody abandoned Ruby just thinking “not my problem” is funny
Now just imagine Donna and the Doctor sipping mojitos on a beach whilst Rose, Donna’s teenage daughter, is getting into all sorts of alien shenanigans with a freaking god of death at UNIT
#I know Donna also probably works at unit but where is she#Is 14 the deadbeat doctor#Just kidding he needs all that time for therapy#Just to be clear I’m glad 14 isn’t turning up in this season but the best explanation we have for his absence is so fucking funny#Not implying that Donna doesn’t care for her daughter#It’s just really funny how 14 is just parked there#I like to imagine they are just so hilariously oblivious to all these going ons#doctor who#dw spoilers#14th doctor#15th doctor#donna noble#ruby sunday#rose noble
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Random TGCF AU of two days ago actually but it won’t leave me alone
Beefleaf AU where HX accidentally gets SQX pregnant… and revenge has to be put on hold because Shi Wudu loves his nibling a lot and is doing 90% of the childcare
#tgcf#random tgcf thoughts#shi qingxuan#shi wudu#he xuan#I can’t see any scenario where swd would trust sqx with a child#so he steps in to help and doesn’t take no for an answer#unfortunately this au also has him think hx is the scum of the earth#because hx (on account of being dead) initially did not believe he could have gotten sqx pregnant#and inadvertently accused her of cheating#which went over very predicatably oops#they make up eventually but swd isn’t the forgive and forget type#beefleaf#technically. if i wrote this it would be very much focused on swd’s relationships haha#swd looking after sqx when she’s pregnant and scared and has just been dumped#scheming with pm & lw on how to explain this child in a way that doesn’t harm sqx’s reputation#being a very present mother in law that hx would complain about on aita if it existed#teaching hx how to do childcare things because he’d better know these things even if swd is around#nagging and lecturing beefleaf nonstop and then being extremely soft when it’s his turn with the baby#kidnapping a doctor from the mortal realm with promises of wealth to look after sqx to make sure nothing goes wrong
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do you ever think about how in journey’s end donna thought she had nothing else to live for, but in the star beast she had something (someone) to die for
#like!!!! in JE she chose death because there was truly no reason for her to live#(ofc the doctor did not let her die and he wiped her mind against her wishes to die as the doctordonna)#and then in the star beast she chose death because of rose. because of shaun. because of sylvia and wilf and all of london#ofc tsb isn’t the first case of donna agreeing to risk her life/sacrifice herself for someone else#she jumped in front of ten when the racnoss empress ordered to shoot him#‘never mind us’ in fires of pompeii#the suicide in turn left (and she didn’t even know the doctor in that universe and still gave her own life for him)#ANYWAYS back to my point#the difference between her choosing death because her old life is so depressing vs her in TSB choosing death bc her old life needs saving#you can say she was pretty much suicidal in JE#and fifteen years later she got her own family. a husband. a daughter that she loves more than anything. a mother who actually appreciates-#-her.#maybe i’m connecting random dots but i think it’s a beautiful example of why you should always keep going. things WILL get better.#my posts#donna noble
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i can’t gif but the way the doctor literally starts SHIELDING rose with his body (and frankly everyone else’s body he literally pushes her in the middle of the crowd) is making me feral
#this entire sequence actually#he’s like i can’t save any of these people but if there is one thing i’m gonna do#it’s get rose out alive#like even before they break into the house he comes downstairs#with one intention and one concern and it is rose#and then he never lets go of her hand#until pete turns up and like…we don’t have time to unpack All of That#but in an AU where rose isn’t so emotional over her parents and mickey#and they are already shagging. the doctor is ripping that waitress outfit off with his teeth when they’re back in the tardis#and whispering that he can’t lose her#i am just saying#these episodes are the actual turning point in ten's arc to me#the most human doctor repressing his emotions going up against humans with no emotions#and saying fuck it i choose PAIN i choose GRIEF. that is his turning point#that's why idiot's lantern is a straight up date and he loses it when she's not safe#but that is another post lol my bad#timepetals#doctor who#tenrose
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i have no impulse control and this sound was a vocal stim for like. way too long last(?) year and boom this is happening.
#kwazii: it’s not a real bomb#OR WAIT NO WHAT IF#peso: OH FUDRUCKER-#WHY IS THERE A BOMB IN THE ROOM WHY IS THERE A BOMB IN THE ROOM WHY IS THERE A BOMB IN THE ROOM#barna: it’s not a *real* bomb#peso: SHJDSH WE WENT THRU ALL THIS AND NOW WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH A *B O M B*#kwazii: omg it’s a bomb! :D#the idea being that like#barna is casually chilling in the med bay waiting for peso with a knife or sword or smth still stabbed in his arm#and peso walks in#looks up#and is just like FFS#he is so done with everything#and barna is like peso cub bestie boo coworker doctor son silly my little guy#it’s literally just a stab wound to the bicep#i’m literally fine i just need it sterilized and stitched up it isn’t even that deep#and peso is soooo done with this bs fhjgdghhf#and then kwazii walks past the open medbay door and is like ‘oh my god it’s a knife/sword! :DD’#i’m actually really enjoying this tho#i did something on accident and turns out it was what i needed to do to make my poses less stiff#so i call this an art exercise#plus it’s good for expressions and dramaticized stylization#slay#octonauts#octonauts fandom#captain barnacles#octonauts kwazii#octonauts barnacles#octonauts peso#coral’s silly art
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Absolutely wild to me that some human guy was just messing around with experimental medicine and invented what is essentially a vampiric blood disease & that’s how we have Muzan! 👀
#don’t flay me for this; but I’m not sure what I was expecting for the demon backstory but it certainly wasn’t that??#a guy just messing around with medicine because some dude had a life threatening disease#and then somehow that turned into occult abilities out of nowhere#it almost feels anti-climactic??? but I still like it!#don’t ask what I would change because I have no idea it just really caught me off guard that it was something like that#that demons are basically a vampiric blood mutation of a guy giving you his condition#still not sure why Muzan is petty about doctors not having a cure??? like bro they’re trying their best and the technology isn’t that good#yet that long ago like bro please that’s not a reason to hate all of humanity and put that on them#demon slayer spoilers#kimetsu no yaiba#demon slayer anime#demon slayer#muzan demon slayer#demon slayer muzan#mine#OP
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Throughout this upcoming year I’d really like to sort out what exactly is going on with my weird little body. Because I have a funny feeling the EDS and unusual hormone balances aren’t conveniently unrelated.
#met up with a new endocrinologist in my new town#and so far every HRT specialist who I’ve met with has not believed me at face value that my T dosage is as low as it is#I’ve been taking .25ml since I started. every time i do a blood panel they opt not to raise it because my T levels are good#But. my testosterone levels were above average before i ever started HRT#and less than a year into being on .25ml IM a week i have dark facial hair and a deep voice#among other things but doctors seem the most surprised by those factors because they’re the most aesthetically noticable#the voice more so than anything else I would suspect#there are just… a lot of funny things about my body that as I’ve gotten older i wonder if are connected#I used to think the EDS symptoms were somehow my fault from years of being in the anorexia sauce#turns out the disability isn’t my fault funny how that works huh#edit the new doctor was very nice lol and she was very polite in how she went about it#I can understand wanting verification on my dose if it’s unusual and she doesn’t know me personally yet
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my sister’s trying to finish doctor who before november 25th right and she’s fucking power watching, like she was literally on s10 LAST WEEK and tonight she’s just started s13. she’s been getting up at 6:30 everyday to watch it before school and then stealing the tv from the moment she gets home to the moment she goes to sleep. i haven’t seen her or the sofa in months
#i am enthusiastically encouraging her ofc#she expressed to me today how she doesn’t know what she’s going to do once she’s finished. she doesn’t know how to return to a normal life#where every waking moment isn’t consumed with doctor who#i’ll have to introduce her to the spin-offs and eu content#is 10 too young to watch torchwood? i’ll set her off on sja#actaully she turns 11 the day after the last special airs#she asked my mum if we had plans on the 9th and my mum was like NO you can’t have friends to sleep for ur birthday and we were just no no m#ther ofc that’s not what she’s asking we need that night free for the 60th you fiend#it’s been really convenient for me too bcs i’ve got a nice little recap#sooo lucky for her tho thats she’s timed it just right so she can finish it the day new content comes out#we watched the timeless children tonight and she was all ‘>:( the masters so evil’ while i was kicking my feet and going aww arent they so#cute so in love hehehe la la la#she’s deeply invested in thasmin#i cant wait for her to watch s13 cus damn she’s gonna love the thasmin-ness of it all#really just typed this all out on tumblr bcs i have no dw friends irl :( apart from her#i’ve really got her with dw she’s forcing her friends to watch it and for world book day they’re going as rose and the doctor#they’ve started a role play where they write letters as rose and ten to each other across universes#she made tea stained paper and everything#anyways stopping myself here goodnight 🫡#doctor who#kori shitposts#loubatania
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i’m just
there must be so many gaps in jieum’s memory
she was the girl of many trades but can she remember how she learnt any of those skills? No they were all from her past lives so they’re gone. Can she remember leaving her neglectful family to live with ae-gyeong? No because she was from a past life, so where does ji-eum think she grew up? She remembers being good at school and her awards but not if anybody was there in the audience for her. She says in her phone call to her superior that she remembers switching departments before, but she doesn’t remember working in the hotel. She cooks meals the exact way as ae-gyeong taught her and she taught ae-gyeong, but she doesn’t remember having learnt them. if she can’t remember anything to do with her past lives, she wouldn’t be able to remember anything that had happened in the past few months the drama is set over.
that must be such an odd and confusing existence, to only remember small dots and flashes of your life, and a giant gap in recent memory, and she doesn’t even seem to be affected by it either? Did she go to the hospital after coming to consciousness standing on a bridge with no idea how she got there? Did they run tests on her brain to see if something had gone wrong? Does she think she suffered a mental breakdown?
What is going on in ji-eum’s brain in those final scenes i want to dissect her thoughts like a grape
#see you in my 19th life#did she move back into her old job on the suggestion of a therapist who is helping her with her sudden memory loss?#she was living with ae-gyeong where did she think she lived?#does she have monthly visits to a group of doctors that are fascinated by her oddly specific memory loss?#in those first few days after losing all her memories. did people she knew try to approach her and she freaked?#if she’d gone to the hospital ae-gyeong would be her emergency contact. maybe it just slipped through the cracks because she was also in#hospital recovering from surgery at the time.#there is a large set of contacts in ji-eum’s phone that she doesn’t recognise at all - not just numbers from her loved ones#but contacts for her job at the hotel as well and anybody she’d met during the show’s run#imagine with me if you will if there had been one final episode instead of those few scenes#ji-eum recovering from what she can only assume is some kind of mental breakdown from stress and her childhood#ae-gyeong coming to visit her in hospital and this deliciously heart-wrenching scene that mirrors ji-eum by her bedside when she was ill#and ji-eum doesn’t recognise her at all and only feels a base level of concern knowing ae-gyeong had surgery not long before#ae-gyeong promising to take care of ji-eum but turns her down because her head and heart hurt from being near her so she rents out an#apartment. she has no recollection of working at the hotel and seo-ha isn’t ready to see her yet it’s too soon so doyun has to handle her#transition back to the engineering track. and in her phone she deletes all the contacts she doesn’t know but when she looks at the photos#and icr if she took one with seo-ha but she must have but defo the one with her ae-gyeong and cho-won. she can’t bear to delete them#even though she doesn’t know them or remember why they were taking this photo. but bc it’s a romance she has to have a few photos of seo-ha#and she sort of ponders over them like. who are you. who were you to me. but it hurts her head so she puts down her phone#and there can be a bunch of times throughout the episode where she just misses him like. she’s asleep in hospital and he brings her flowers#and she wakes up just in time to see the back of his head leaving the room. she could visit ae-gyeong to try to rebuild this#parental relationship she doesn’t remember but has all the proof that this is the lady who raised her. and like in the show seo-ha could be#sat right behind her but he doesn’t interact with her directly they just do the napkin bit and then he leaves w/o looking at her#and the meet-up with cho-won could stay the same with the difference that ji-eum recognises her from their photo and says something like#’we know each other don’t we.’ and cho-won gets so excited and maybe even calls them sisters but then she realises what she’s doing and is#like. ‘that’s how it felt for me. we worked together just a few months ago. i’m cho-won’ and then ji-eum can do that#gorgeous reach for her memories from the show where she rolls the name around her mouth because it’s just so familiar#and ofc i’d change nothinf about the scene where she finally re-unites with seo-ha that was delicious af#but i feel like there were just too many gaps in her memories for it to have been smoothed over y’know?#disclaimer i read the webtoon first and loved it but think it had to change for the adaptation
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having a normal one over here
#i think the meds overcorrected#i cannot sleep and i am bubbling with Emotions#can i tell what most of them are? No#but there’s a lot of them#and they’re not actually super shitty??#they’d be nice if they could just dial it down a notch#also this isn’t vague posting to be clear i’m not having Emotions because anything happened#this is run-of-the-mill confusion posting#kinda nervous for the comedown after these like. several consecutive pretty great days in a row???#other than the late night panic attacks i was giving myself by reading the news#my doctor literally made me go into my settings and turn off notifs for my news apps#while telling me ‘at least you’re self aware’#(bc i knew it was the news fucking me up i just wasn’t Allowed to turn off notifs)#anyway i’ve gone on a tangent#tumblr is back to being my journal#which means i’m gonna get like. at least 3x more annoying with my posting.#anyway i’m also thinking about Women but like. what’s new right?#also it’s Pride Month if there was ever a time to be gay over women it is NOW#someone’s gonna have to talk me out of dating apps again soon#(i hate dating apps and i don’t even want to date)#(but like maybe there are other cool queer people who wanna have queer movie nights and be casually gay together)#(you never know unless you try!)#anyway i’m not gonna be embarrassed for those tags bc if you’ve read this far that’s on you#personal
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.
#like I’m sorry#I love my best friend so so so much and she’s perfect and kind and has gone above and beyond to be rational and to be there for me#and I get it she’s an autistic woman and has faced adversity and has had to go on medical leave and that’s hard#and I’m not being dismissive of her struggles#but it makes me so angry because her parents unconditionally love her and her siblings and have always made her feel that way#and has never worried about money as a kid#and yeah her relationship with her parents isn’t perfect of course#but she literally cannot understand domestic violence beyond just reading about it in a book#like she did everything she can to understand and relate#but sometimes I want to scream because I feel so alone#because no one in my life fucking understands why I’m the way I am#and I’ve been struggling the past two months really badly with coping#I’ve had to go to the doctor to ask about PTSD and not like the tik tok OWO kind#but the I was in a car crash as a kid with my dad as a drunk driver and I keep getting flashbacks in my daily life to being a small child#that are impacting by daily life and interactions#and like I feel so fucking alone#and to hear from my friends ‘your right this is horrible and toxic but lots of people go through this’ ISNT FUCKING HELPING#I don’t want to hear that it’s normal I want to feel fucking safe in my bedroom without my mother blowing up my phone or calling the cops#I am unwell and I’m so stressed and I’m so sick and I can’t cope with this and none of the therapists I’ve tried to find handle ptsd#especially not therapists of color#I’m angry and I’ve been getting worse over the past two months#and not that it matters but due to ^^^ reasons my birthday has always been insanely fucking bad for me#like depression watch bad. when I turned twenty I was vividly hallucinating while walking around campus for a week straight having#flashbacks in class and I had to be taken out of the auditorium because I was physically unwell and couldn’t stop crying and shaking#and I told my friend I didn’t want to celebrate I just wanted to sit on her couch and not be alone and she fucking ditched me#because an emergency with a different friend came up the night before#like I have a history of suicidal ideation traumatic flashbacks eating disorders and self harm and I’m asking you to be with me on a very#upsetting day and you call me the night before telling me we have to cancel because another friend is having a bigger crisis#and like you don’t even feel a little bad about it??#I’m just upset and scared and I’ve got a doctors appointment tomorrow and I’m not in reality right now and that’s scary
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selkies… chameleon arched time lords…. same story.
#we’ve seen the master chameleon arched around the doctor we need it the other way around now#rtd im in your house i have an idea of how the master can show up again. stop screaming. listen to me.#fobwatched doctor and this guy who he doesn’t know who is looking out for him. in turns friendly and vaguely ominous.#and ending with the reveal that it is the master. and he turns the doctor back. doesn’t steal the watch and leave him helpless. because.#what’s the point of it all if it isn’t *the doctor* who sees them. you know?
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The Bentley is a Tardis. I know this because it told me so
#this is more of a joke than a theory but I’m still going to explain my reasoning because this is my post and I can do what I want#so first of all it can change appearance as we see in season two#and it’s also sentient it listens to Aziraphale when he talks to it and chooses to make everything queen#also Crowley has some sort of phsychic connection to it because he can feel when Aziraphale has turned it yellow or is going below the speed#limit even though he’s no where near it#also gallifrey exists within the good omens universe so it’s not entirely impossible#though my personal interpretation is that it is a Bentley that’s also kind of a Tardis#like not a full Tardis in the same way that river isn’t really a timelord#good omemes#go2#go2 spoilers#doctor who
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