#the dedication to the work is dedication to each other

[sabrinahawthorne]

Let’s Grow the RPG Hobby

Inspired by this post and the conversation surrounding it.

So the RPG world is facing a multitude of interconnected problems. Let’s talk about them, shall we?

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1: The Problem(s)

Writing this, I find it hard to pinpoint a way to frame the subject of this post as a single thing. But it’s also impossible to treat it as it it’s a collection of separate problems. In reality, the issues facing the indie RPG world are A Hydra; a many-headed conglomeration of related issues, which each require organized, dedicated work to solve. A few examples:

The Normie-Indie Divide

A problem close to my heart, The Normie-Indie Divide describes the gradient between the mainstream of an artistic hobby and the really independent stuff. I compare this to movies a lot, but the more apt analogy is video games. The N-I-D in the videogame industry is so small as to be virtually nonexistent.

We can see this via a number of factors – one example being that the same outlets which cover massive blockbusters & sequels like Assassin’s Creed and God of War, also cover popular indie titles like Celeste and Hollow Knight. Then, freelance journalists who write for those publications (Jacob Geller is an example) go on to cover much smaller games on their own time, and so on. There’s a smooth gradient between the media coverage of the huge stuff, all the way down to a thriving (if still underserved) super-independant industry.

The N-I-D in RPGs feels uncrossable. The most well known RPG is so big it’s currenly riding the high of its second major hollywood adaptation in 20 years, and the second most popular – Vampire the Masquerade – is an unknown even to some indie RPG fans.* This hobby is shockingly impenetrable, even to those of us who spend our days swimming in the deepest end of the pool.

The Supply & Demand Problem

This one’s simple: People are pumping out RPGs by the truckload, and there are just too many! Not only does this make it hard to sift through everything to find the thing you want to read, play, or review, it also makes it nearly impossible to get anyone’s eyeballs on the cool thing you just released!

As others have pointed out, this problem is exacerbated by the fact that relative to some other art media, it’s pretty quick and painless to whip up your own zine or one-pager and publish it on itch. This disincentivises even the most invested of us from looking at a ton of new games, and means that sharing your work can feel like you’re being ignored by a huge crowd.

A Road To Solutions

If all of that is making you feel pretty bad for the future of this medium, you’re not alone. It can feel pretty hopeless facing all of these problems as an indie designer when all the tools you have at your disposal are a tumblr account and a few indie friends to complain to.

But the truth is, I think that this Hydra is eminently slayable. I just don’t think we can do it alone. That in mind, I’ve spent a large portion of my day putting together…

The Call to Action

I think there needs to be organized, persistent effort put into the future of this hobby and this industry, and I think it needs to start the way all good movements do: with a lot of petty, semantic argumentation over definitions and implementation. And to kick things off, here’s my step zero: If you’re reading this post because I’ve tagged you in it (or because I’ve sent you a link to it), my Dms are open. I want to put together a discord group chat† of my peers within RPG tumblr who are invested in tackling The Hydra, such that we can start brainstorming plans of attack to disseminate into the wider community.

The issues I wish to address are these:

The Normie-Indie Divide: How do we go about cultivating a casual audience of indie RPG fans who can bring sustainability and longevity to the industry?

The Supply & Demand Problem: How do we minimize the cognitive load of sorting through the huge volume of work extant in this medium, and more generally encourage peer-to-peer interaction within the community, like news coverage, reviews, and marketing?

The Cognitive Frontload Problem: How do we make it easier to actually engage with a given RPG, considering the amount of cognitive & temporal investment needed? Further, how do we make RPGs, both general and specific, more accessible to readers with a wide variety of abilities, preferences, and available time?

The Insular Community Problem: How do we better connect this hobby with itself, such that it feels a little less like several dozen cliques across 4-6 platforms, and more like the growing, evolving single hobbyist community that it is? Further, how do we make this hobby more accessible to newbies outside the influence of The Hegemons of the Coast?

And more. I’m positive I haven’t thought of everything, and that’s exactly why this needs to be a group effort.

As a last note: Please tag other people! The folks I’ve mentioned here are just those who I personally feel I know well enough to tag; let’s get the rest of the community involved! If you know someone who would be interested who isn’t on tumblr, they can email me: sabrinahawthornegames@proton.me.

*I’m not kidding. Multiple times within the last four months, I’ve introduced VtM to people who I would consider pretty in the sauce of RPGs. I’m talking folks who’ve played Heart: The City Beneath or Wanderhome. It’s bizarre.

†I need to stress that this is only a start. I’m not looking to start a big public discord unless that’s what a group of folks decide is the right call. By “group chat,” I mean “a chat which exists for long enough to hold 1-3 group voice calls to discuss and hash things out, before it’s dissolved in favor of the execution of whatever plans we devise.”

@theresattrpgforthat; @omophagic-beast; @ladytabletop; @rowansender; @monsterfactoryfanfic; @arsene-inc; @toyourstations

[the-cosmic-cauldron]

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 18+ How Filthy Are You: Raw & Naked ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

💌Welcome to 7 Days, 7 Posts! In honor of Valentine’s Day on February 14th, I’m releasing seven blog posts dedicated to love, intimacy, passion, and everything that ignites the flames. Join me on this journey as I share my insights on astrological placements that spark attraction, create chemistry, and merge souls.

If you enjoy my content, be sure to follow me, explore my other posts, and check out my paid services! 💌

Aries Venus: Tongue kissing, aggressive neck grabs, smacking, biting, pulling hair, aggressive fingering, gagging on it, talking extremely dirty, throwing the other person down, standing up while the other is on their knees, spanking, and ordering the other person around.

Aries Mars: Aggressively pulling your lover closer to you, so close their breath creates steam. Not in it for your lover's pleasure, purely in it for yours. Every stroke is closer to your orgasm. You slow it down, so you can build your orgasm, then faster, faster, faster. Until the orgasm comes, then you lie down, “I’m not finished,” you utter. You catch your breath, then get back up. Now it’s all your lover's pleasure. You start off slow, building your stamina, then faster, faster, faster; every moan they give you inspires a harder and more powerful move, until they’re shaking, begging you to stop, and you do your final move and they orgasm.

Taurus Venus: Watching porn, putting on lingerie, putting on makeup, taking a shower, slow lip kisses, massaging the most intimate parts of the body, putting oil on, lighting a candle, dry humping, licking the body in a trance, eye contact until the other folds, long session of head, extending time just cuddling and kissing.

Taurus Mars: Whispering in your lover's ear, “You ready?”, teasing them, putting it in then pulling it out, licking their pussy then kissing their thighs, playing with their nipples, then back to thrusting, back to licking. Slow and steady, no rush; the more they moan louder, the less you do. You’re trying to work them to their orgasm, not get them there immediately. Thrusting more and more with your fingers on her clit, pushing your body so close to theirs that every movement is felt. At the last minute, doing that one thing that turns them on so much, then watching them orgasm as you kiss them gently while they shake.

Gemini Venus: Watching porn, masturbating and making the other watch, dressing up, using sex toys, creating a plot, feeding your ego (telling you what you want to hear), teasing you with their words, fingering you, grabbing your neck, spanking, playing porn on the TV while getting or giving head.

Gemini Mars: A mixture of slow and fast-paced. One minute you’re making out, teasing the other playfully. Pause; you have a long make-out session again, telling the other person how good they look, how good their body looks, how much you crave and want them. Then you wait until they say they want it or are begging you for it before you slowly and carefully move towards them. Every thrust and lick comes with eye contact, then back to being preoccupied with pleasing. Each movement devours the other person; their moans are like long passive screams. The Gemini Mars can’t get enough; they want to finish in the naughtiest place they can and ask how they did afterward.

Cancer Venus: Cuddling, deep eye contact, holding hands and intimate kisses, long finger strokes across the most sensitive areas of the body, telling the other how much you love them, how special they are, the amount of care you have for them, kisses in places to mark one's territory, long sessions of head, licking and sucking nipples, playful teasing.

Cancer Mars: Relaxing, scented candle in the background with warm, freshly cleaned sheets, sitting in front of a TV as the movie plays in the background, a romance movie. Not wanting to do anything because you’re nervous, but glancing at the other over and over again, seductively. Slowly taking off clothes, leaning in for kisses, and grabbing on the most intimate parts of the other’s body. Backing up, taking a break and returning to the movie, then your lover becomes insanely horny and pushes you down on the bed from behind. You like this aggression; it makes you sweat, it makes you wild. Getting closer to your lover and kissing, tongue kissing, kissing all over their body, slowly working your way to the main session. Slow strokes, caressing their body while pleasing their spot. Saying I love you, I want you, I crave you, whispering in their ear all the way until they finish. Afterwards, you lie in the bed, sleepy, while you cuddle your lover.

Leo Venus: Playful teasing, playing a sex playlist, tongue kissing, complimenting the other, making them beg for it, making the other as horny as possible, slapping their ass, biting on their nipples, staring intensely, dominating the other, praising the other, using sex toys, pole dancing, stripping, giving head like there is no tomorrow.

Leo Mars: Having a good conversation, laughing, teasing, being overall playful. Staring at the other with a smirk, knowing what’s about to go down. The other person can’t stop touching you; you push them away, you make them earn it. This is not something you’re just going to give up easily; the person has to crave you, not superficially, but crave your dominance, crave your kind of pleasure. You let their eyes wander, you let them touch you where you want. You tell them what to do, and they do it. When you say more, they give more; when you say louder, they moan louder. They follow your commands, and they make you feel powerful. When you say, "say my name," they say it. Hot, sweaty, like a workout, you do what you need to make the person fully satisfied.

Virgo Venus: Taking a hot, steamy shower, drinking water or tea, or an energy drink, cuddling in bed, long, deep conversations, holding hands, tracing circles on their body, massaging their body, playing with the other person's hair, playing soft music in the background, slow, soft kisses, licking all over the other's body, slow and methodical head.

Virgo Mars: Eating a hearty meal together, having a talk about the day, unwinding, making small jokes, staring at the other, being nervous, playful hits, giving compliments to your lover as you make your way to the bedroom. Washing your hands, putting on some sounds to block out noise, then getting serious, pulling out the toys, the lotion, the oil, the sweet smell of the candle that you light while teasing your lover. Building intensity, slowly and methodically starting at one point of the body, moving all over slowly, taking time, making sure to please one spot before moving on to the other. Getting intensely pleasured at how much your lover is moaning, feeling satisfied. Having the stamina and lasting a long time, even your partner begins to beg for you to stop. You give in, then push back and give more until they finish. You finish off with taking a hot, steamy shower and putting on some fresh clothes.

Libra Venus: Wine and dine, soft kisses, playing in the other's hair, words of affirmation, gazing into each other's eyes, playful teasing, creating the ambiance, passionate holding of the other's body, warm embraces, fingering, giving head, staring into the other's eyes.

Libra Mars: Gazing into your lover's eyes, surveying their entire body, small kisses, soft strokes, deep analyzing of where you want to begin and what will build the most tension. Slow, taking it all in, heavy breathing, soft moans, building up momentum slower than fast, discerning the pace based on your lover's satisfaction, different positions, using toys, intensity as the orgasm builds, and holding onto the orgasm until the person can’t do it anymore, then holding your lover afterward.

Scorpio Venus: Intense staring, whispers, moments of silence, dark settings, candlelight only, under the covers, in lingerie, sex toys, whips, chains, handcuffs, blindfolds, gags, paddles, hot wax, aggressive play, pulling on the other's hair, dominating foreplay, gagging, intense head

Scorpio Mars: Intensely staring into each other's eyes, lip biting and caressing your tongue into your lover's mouth, spitting in their mouth, then smacking them intensely, pulling on their hair while you pin them down. Once pinned down, honing in and focusing first on their most intimate and scared areas of pleasure, slow and precise, licking, teasing, caressing, kissing. Then back to kissing and pulling your lover closer, so close into your body. You want to feel every ounce of them on you, and you thrust every ounce of you onto them: long strokes, powerful blows, intense movements, consistently until your lover gives in to orgasm, only to continue afterwards—continue to thrust, hold them, bite their ear, and make sure their pleasure extends beyond the orgasm.

Sagittarius Venus: Having a good time, drinking wine or liquor, getting high, free and anywhere, outside in nature, in public in a corner, at someone else’s house, fully naked and free, wild and untamed, licking nipples, playing with balls, giving soul-sucking head, playful teasing, filming, masturbating in front of one another, eating ass, using sex toys.

Sagittarius Mars: Having a blast, hazy feelings, laughing, teasing one another, trying to dominate your lover while your lover tries to dominate you, a power play game. Starting off with full intense thrusting, rapid pounding, fast, then faster, slow it down, then back to pounding, thrusting hard. First orgasm. Moving back into giving phenomenal head, the kind that doesn’t stop lick after lick, suck after suck, non-stop, barely breathing, second orgasm. Then it's time to switch up to asshole play; the third orgasm is the knock-out. And then fall asleep.

Capricorn Venus: Intense staring, silence, reading body language, inching closer, holding hands, kissing on the cheek, then moving to the chest, then moving to the genitalia, hair pulling, nipple biting, ass smacking, hand on the other's neck, telling them you want to fuck, feeling on their body, aggressive and long session of head, tongue kissing.

Capricorn Mars: Smirking while you rip off your lover's clothing, straight into it, heavy breathing and moaning, pressing hard against them, having them feel your body parts, your wetness, your hardness. Starting from the head, finishing at the feet. Kissing, forcing your dick into your lover's mouth, sitting on their face, nipple play, biting then licking your lover's boobs, intense sessions of head staring into your lover's eyes, strong thrusts, booty recoils, digging deeper and deeper into your lover. Ultimately waiting and waiting through the moans and screams for the ultimate orgasm. Acting completely normal after an hour of being nasty.

Aquarius Venus: Threesomes, orgies, watching others have sex, masturbating in front of the other, anal play, using sex toys, golden showers, choking, vibrators, lingerie, role play, bondage, cuckold, outdoor sex, gagging during oral sex, squirting, fingering, fisting, spitting in each other's mouth, pegging.

Aquarius Mars: Dedicating an ample amount of time to your love to explore all that you desire. Restraining yourself prior so that you can be extra horny and prepared. Watching your lover masturbate while you play with yourself. Teasing your lover, you walk to them and bend them over, anal play, eating their ass, fingering their ass, fingering their pussy then their ass, using all the holes available, mouth on pussy, mouth on dick, fingers in pussy, giving the dick a handjob while sucking on the balls, getting down and dirty, filthy, clothes ripped off. Going from aggressive head to small strokes on the clit for an orgasm. Going from gagging on the dick to riding your lover's face. Mixing different moves, pulling out the sex toys, trying different positions. Restraining from orgasm, as it inches closer you pull back, then start again. Sticking it in the asshole, then in the mouth. Fingering the pussy while eating it. On and on, slowing down when the orgasm inches closer then going back to it until both you and your lover orgasm.

Pisces Venus: Romanticism, cuddles, soft kisses, long gazes, expressing feelings, tight hugs, warm embraces, tracing circles on the other’s skin, a warm bath, a soft bed, compliments, nipple sucking, slow, deep breaths, a good playlist in the background, slowly removing clothes, whispering, toe sucking.

Pisces Mars: A cosmic dance with your lover, nothing harsh, simply a merging of the two of you closer to each other. Quiet glances, looking up and down, small gestures to emphasize that you crave your lover, a hand on their thigh, gripping it, a smirk as they grab a part of your body. Staring but then looking away, your lover comes to you. Holding their hands, kissing them slowly, soft kisses on the neck, down the back, near the spine, soft moans that one cannot hear loud, but it’s there, intense breathing. Merging closer and closer, on top of each other, feeling the other's breath. Caressing their dick, massaging their pussy, licking and sucking with ease and calm, back and forth with a rhythm. Getting into your favorite position, staring at your lover in awe, moaning, looking away, taking your time, not so fast, not so slow, but sometimes faster when it feels so good. Right there, right there you say as you continue to feel the intensity of the build-up of an orgasm. Letting the orgasm build until you can’t take it anymore and orgasm, then fall over for a nap, or sleep.

[girl-lostconnection]

Hello!!!

I’ve been reading your works for a while and I’m hyperfixating adore you’re writings! So I saw this Red Bull ad during the Super Bowl and the penguin reminded me of Soap. Could I please humbly request hybridpenguin!Soap x reader fluff/comfort/romance/head canons anything really. I think you can bring this idea to life :3

It’s your lucky day cause I’ve been watching “Good luck Chuck” and there are some penguins that caught my eye. So I’ve been thinking about it whole day, googling penguins because I honestly don’t know much about them.

I chose Adelie Penguin for Soap because the blue-eyed stare this birds have is perfectly uncanny (I urge you to google them, they stare right in your soul) and also, they have very interesting courting rituals.

Also the wiki page for them said, I quote: “Despite their size, Adélie penguins are known for their bold and boisterous personality and will challenge other animals, including predators far larger than them.” And that reads like canonical Soap, because yeah, he would. Bold personality is right up this man’s alley.

But imagine hybrid Adelie Penguin!Soap and human Reader where he tries so fucking hard to court you properly but you don’t know jackshit about courting methods.

Male Adelie Penguins offer female penguin the perfect stone, polished to perfection, they spend quite some time looking for the best one and once found — they present it as a courting gift. It depends purely on the female penguin whether to accept courtship or not.

But if she does they can start mutual courting involving leaning closer to each other, grooming each other, familiarising with how each other sound — it helps them later to find the mate in the big crowd.

So Soap knows that maybe it would have been better to go with flower or something more conventional but he likes you, god, he really does. So there’s no harm in looking for a pretty stone for a pretty you, right?

Right?

Man spends his whole leave on Scotland’s shores, practically on all fours as he picks up decent stones, washes and polishes them at home before throw them all out because no. All wrong. Not prettty enough, not smooth enough, not shiny enough.

No mate would accept a shite like that, why would he even bring this ugly thing to your attention? What kind of potential mate would he be?

He returns to his searches even more determined. Soap will be damned if he comes back and he still doesn’t have a perfect stone for you.

And finally, luck smiles at him and dedication pays off — the perfect prettiest little stone he has ever seen. Smooth from cold waves, shiny in a way that makes you want it touch again and again, perfectly round. No ridges or bumps, no sharp edges or cracks.

Perfect stone for perfect you.

He returns feeling victorious and on top of the world and presents you with a stone without a second word. Quite literally he just extends his hand and there lies the stone. He doesn’t say anything, he’s just waiting for your reaction

And you have no fucking idea what’s going on, because the man is staring you in the eyes with his ungodly blue eyes and a little stone on his palm and you’re like…okay?:,) alright?🥹

So you take the stone to look closer (Soap tenses up like you have his heart in your hands, eyes hungry on you, still waiting for your reaction) and truth be told, it is a really nice stone. Shiny and smooth and perfectly polished. The kind of stone you’d want to fumble with all day, just rolling through the palm, massaging the center of your palm with it as you work.

It is a bloody lovely stone. You really like it.

But Johnny is not saying it, still watching you with the same hungry look, it’s just that now his grin is widening slowly because you look like you really like the stone. He did a good job, right? There’s no way you found his courting gift lacking.

And it is a perfect stone but the thing is…you don’t know if it’s a gift to you or if penguin part of Soap is simply showing off (crow!Simon does similar things when he brings you shiny stuff). So you don’t know if you are at liberty to keep the shiny pebble.

And Johnny is still completely fucking silent watching you with bated breath.

You carefully place the stone back in his palm, murmuring softly that it’s a very lovely stone, it looks incredible and you think it is absolutely gorgeous.

Soap stares at the stone for a few very long moments, his grin slowly fading because…don’t- don’t you like the stone, hen? You just said it’s gorgeous, but you are giving it back. Why are you giving it back?

He stares at the stone, absolutely crest-fallen in the face because he was so sure you’d like it. He was so proud of it and so excited to give it to you and of course there is no pressure for you to take it, after all it’s gift for you and you shouldn’t just settle for things.

But still.

What was wrong with it? Was there a crack he didn’t notice or is the texture of it not to your liking? Maybe you prefer sharper stones, maybe you like some roughness to them?

He looks back at you, feeling upset and anxious, stone still in hand while you try to gauge what the hell caused the reaction. Because Johnny is looking at you like you just kicked him in the stomach and you don’t know why.

“Ye didnae like it, hen?”, he swallows his pride and asks because obviously, you didn’t, what kind of fucking question is that. Mate just returned his gift back to him, means that gift is not up to standards.

You blink at him slowly, because what is he even talking about.

“I liked it. It’s really pretty. Where did you get it?”, you try to steer conversation away, since maybe there’s something you don’t seem to get about the stone.

“Why- ye didnae take it”, Soap’s voice is unusually soft, as he tilts his head to the side, stone clutched in his hand as some anxiety bleeds out of him.

Maybe he can still salvage it.

“Was it for me?”, the question leaves him now being the one who gives you a slow blink, before his gears kick in, realisations slowly creeping up his head. So that’s what was wrong.

“Aye”, stone returns to your palm, gets pressed into it by Johnny’s — warm and smooth — your heart skipping a beat. “If ye like it, Ah’d be happy if ye took it. But ainlie if ye like it, hen”

There’s a weight to this moment that you aren’t sure you capture fully but there’s something in Soap’s eyes that makes your fingers intertwine with his, head leaning closer to him. You are so close you can see the tiniest freckles on his cheeks.

Pretty.

“I really like it”, admitting it feels like you are ten again and sharing a silly secret with a boy you like, but Johnny looks at you like he couldn’t be happier.

His throat bobbing when you lean in closer, small shiver going down his spine because it’s really happening. His gift is accepted, his mate is accepting him — holding his hand, leaning into him, looking at him like that.

Best day of his life, truly.

So he presses a short tight kiss to your temple and nods at you like there is a shared understanding between you two now. Like you are partners in crime.

Soap practically jogs away, excitement evident in every step, shoulders spread out proudly. He fucking did it. He got the perfect stone for perfect you and you accepted it.

Now, the courting can really begin.

(It will take you an evening of google searches before you understand the meaning of the stone and why the hell, Soap is helping with your hair routine/skin care routine/nail polishing and even offers to “wash with the penguin, save the water, hen”)

[celerydays]

long time no see…

Hey, hi, hello~

I don't know if anyone is still around this little blog o' mine or if I'm just showing up suddenly on the dash and whoever is seeing this might not recall ever even following me lol.

But – whether you remember me or not – I'm just dropping by to say that...I've missed you and that I truly hope you're doing well 🫂💗

I...have not been doing so well. But I've been working on it.

In a way, it's been healing to reshape my approach to things like journaling and capturing photos. I've been taking the time to develop a practice in documenting daily life – the people I care about, the places we visit, and all the random little moments in between – with more intentionality and care than I have in recent years.

(tw: grief and loss/death under cut)

We lost my mother very suddenly last November – and things have been unbearably hard the last few months.

In a lot of ways, 2024 was one of the best years: my partner and I traveled to Japan for the first time ever, my family had a small reunion in our hometown to watch the total solar eclipse together, my best friends got married, and we went on so many amazing trips and had the type of outings that made me so inspired, optimistic, and excited about life and the future.

But in so many other ways, it was also one of the worst years I've had in a long time: starting with a hard-learned (but perhaps overdue) firsthand lesson and reminder on how scary and mean the internet can be, followed by losing both my grandfather in the spring and then my mother just before the winter holidays.

I'm not particularly good when it comes to emotions– forget about even processing grief or putting into any sort of meaningful words how it all feels. But I guess all of this has made me shift my mindset when it comes to wanting to just...remember. To not forget.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

On documenting life through journaling...

I had always journaled in some way or another all my life, but I only really started considering it a serious practice and hobby sometime around 2020. But I had lost my way with it in recent years, treating it solely as some kind of aesthetic-only venture, and only dedicating the time if I knew that I could make it "pretty" and "palatable for sharing".

And so, many entries were missed; days and weeks lost to fuzzy recollection, months bled into each other, and little moments only existed as vague and passing snapshots on my phone gallery (if I even remembered to take a photo).

But I now wish I had just written it down; whatever it was – big, small, angry, funny, sad, happy – just wrote it all down. It didn't have to be an aesthetically collaged spread or artful doodle or drawing. I wish I had documented some of the last times I had seen or spoken with my mother; what she had said, did, or how she reacted to silly news or quips I told her. I barely remember anything even just from the last year.

So now I write it all down, day after day: I'll write what's on my mind, what we did before, what I'm doing currently, what I'm planning to do. If someone calls or my partner walks in to my studio while I'm working and tells me something that has me reacting in the moment I'll jot down a little "omg!!" or "lol" or "holy shit" next to whatever they said or did.

If I get little scraps from the day – receipts, tags, tickets, wrappers – I'll paste it in wherever it happens to fit in my journal, with a little note of the date or what the outing was. And every so often, I'll print out photos to paste in with notes relating back to past entries or junk journal spreads.

Is always pretty? No, but it's pretty in its chaos. Is it always even chronological? Not at all. Does it always make sense? Not really. But I love every page so, so much more than anything I had carefully curated before in my previous journals.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

On documenting life through photos...

I had once carried a camera with me everywhere before phone cameras became decent enough that I didn't feel the need to have a dedicated tool for just taking pictures anymore.

It wasn't until we were all looking through our collective family photos to use for my mother's memorial service and headstone that it hit me that I just don't take as many pictures as I used to– and even when I did, they just don't compare to the ones that I took years ago when I did carry a camera with me on every outing and trip.

We ended up choosing a photo of her that I had taken on my once-beloved dSLR camera I used to haul around with me almost 10 years ago; she was smiling, strong, radiant, beautiful– and it was just a random moment I took my camera out in a Taiwan hair salon while she was waiting for me and my sister to get our hair done for our cousin's wedding.

A bit indescribable – and not even something I realized was missing – but there's something about having an actual camera on hand that pushes me to take more photos, and somehow better and more mindful photos at that.

And so I made the decision to invest in a new camera. An absolute necessity to take photos? No, of course not; I do still have my phone camera after all. But they say (apparently) that "the best camera is the one that you actually use"– and I was most definitely not using my phone as much as I could have been.

This new camera though? Only time will truly tell, but the past has shown that I've worked better with a dedicated camera on hand and already I can't begin to explain the difference it's made in the last week alone since I picked up the habit of carrying a camera around with me again.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

This was a crazy long post that sort of got away from me. Not sure where I want to go from here – I guess I just want to say that if you ever felt called to document your life in some way, it's never too late to start; you'll only wish that you had begun sooner.

If you're still here– I love you. I hope you're taking care of yourself.

And thank you for reading along with my incredibly longwinded life update of what was essentially just "I'm grieving so I started journaling more and also bought a camera" lol.

💗

[cosmicjoke]

I saw @acmeangel's analysis post on this scene, which is fantastic and which everyone should read, and I was going to add my thoughts to their post, but then it got too long (as usual), and I didn't want to hijack their analysis, so I decided to just make my own, haha. This really is an important scene which essentially encapsulates the difference between Levi and Erwin and which I think ultimately showcases what makes Levi such a genuine hero.

One of the overarching messages of AoT is that we shouldn't give up our humanity in pursuit of an ideological goal. I've talked a lot about how Levi puts his trust in Erwin and admires him so much because he sees Erwin's ability to set aside his personal feelings for the greater good as a virtuous quality, one which Levi hopes to be able to one day emulate. Levi sees Erwin as superior to himself for this ability, because Levi, no matter how hard he tries, isn't ever able to do the same. He's never able to set emotion aside. He's never able to make decisions detached from emotion. He's never able to send soldiers to their deaths without it tearing him apart and creating in him a sense of conflict. He's never quite able to convince himself that the thing these soldiers are dying for, which they choose to die for, is actually worth it, which is also why he works so hard to bring their goal to fruition. He can't accept that those lives were given in vain, but the only way to ensure that they weren't is to make their dream comes true. Because to Levi, it's their lives that have value, not the cause itself.

One of Levi's most defining traits, one which makes him stand out from basically every other character in the story, is that he has no dream of his own. Rather, he carries the dreams of others, makes himself the custodian of those dreams, and dedicates himself to their realization.

When he says in this scene that a pointless death doesn't suit anyone, what he's saying is that the cause Erwin is sacrificing soldiers for has to prove itself worthy of their lives, that it has to amount to something equal in value to those lives. Because that's the thing, Levi values life above all else. He sees each, individual life as being as important as the whole of humanity, and I think that aspect of Levi's character is demonstrated fully during the RtS arc, when he makes the choice to end Erwin's suffering. People argue and claim that Levi made the wrong choice here because they don't understand the thematic significance of it, getting caught up in speculation about whether Erwin would have been able to prevent the war between Paradis and Marley, whether Erwin would have been able to stop the Rumbling, etc... By getting caught up in that, they completely miss the point of how the story wants the audience to understand the importance of not giving up our humanity for any cause. It's trying to show us, through Levi's choice, why we can't let any cause or ideological movement turn us cruel. Levi's refusal to be cruel, his refusal to throw away his humanity, is meant to be seen as a good thing, and ultimately, ironically, it's Levi's humanity and compassion that makes him a superior man to Erwin.

Erwin tries to assuage his own guilt by telling himself that the lives given were for a cause greater than any, individual life. The cause of humanity. This is a narrative he clings to until he's forced to admit to himself that what he really was after in sending all these soldiers to their deaths was his personal pursuit of knowledge, in another attempt to assuage his guilt for the death of his father. Erwin sacrifices his humanity for a goal which is self-serving, and as he's forced to contend with that reality, his guilt grows tenfold, fracturing his psyche and self-identity. But even if his every decision had been for the so-called greater good, even if he'd been 100% dedicated to his duty as Commander, he still would have been left with a sense of guilt and self-loathing for sacrificing lives to this nebulous cause, just like Hange ultimately was, because the whole point of the contrast between Levi and Erwin is to show that, in the end, Levi is the one whom the audience should strive to emulate, not Erwin.

This moment in the story is driving home the point of choosing compassion over ideology, or even duty. Levi's choice is imperative in demonstrating to us that if we sacrifice our own, personal humanity, if we give into becoming cruel and unfeeling, if we lose sight of the very thing that drove us to wanting the world to be a better place to begin with, that being our compassion and desire to end the suffering of others, no matter how justified the cause may seem, we're essentially sacrificing humanity itself. Because it's when you start becoming cruel, for any cause, that everything turns to shit, both for ourselves and the world around us. It's cruelty that leads into justification of more cruelty, which leads into justification of atrocities. Bringing Erwin back, forcing him back into that role which was tearing him apart, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, would have been purely an act of cruelty. But Levi isn't a cruel man. He's exactly the opposite. He's a man defined by his compassion and kindness. And what is AoT advocating for if not greater compassion and kindness in the face of a cruel world? It's telling us that the kind of compassion that Levi showed to Erwin in his dying moments is how we should choose to fight against the world's injustices and cruelties.

Because all the bad things that happen in AoT, essentially, happen because of a willingness to sacrifice ones humanity for ideology or for personal, selfish desires, and because it's those of us who retain our humanity and compassion, despite the cruelty of the world, and despite any supposed duty to any professed cause, that end up being able to live, as Levi says, with no regrets. This idea of sacrificing what we know is right for some abstract, nebulous goal of a better tomorrow is what leads to the destruction and corruption of our inner selves, and that, ironically, makes a better tomorrow impossible. If we become corrupted, if we allow ourselves to be lost to this idea of the greater good, in the end, it will only continue on the cycle of destruction.

Levi never sacrifices what he believes is right, never acts in any way which goes against his conscience. He never betrays his humanity. He maintains his compassion from beginning to end, and he never wavers in what he's fighting for, which, again, is every, individual life. That's what makes Levi a hero. His inability and refusal to set his personal feelings aside is, in the end, meant to be seen as the correct course. Because Levi's personal feelings have nothing to do with a dream or a goal. They have nothing to do with an ideology or movement. They aren't rooted in self-gain or greed. His sense of duty isn't to a cause, not to a country or an empire, or a sense of retribution or revenge. His duty, his obligation, is to doing what he feels, in his heart, is the right thing, what his personal feelings tell him is the right thing, no matter the situation or circumstances, no matter, even, if it turns out to have been the right choice or not. And that ties back into Levi's extraordinary compassion and empathy. It's his compassion and empathy which dictate his personal feelings of right and wrong, and his dedication to not betraying that sense is what ultimately dictates all his choices.

Levi thought of himself as a lesser man than Erwin because of this. Because of the way he wasn't able to set his personal feelings aside in the choices he made. It's why he chose to follow Erwin, because he thought it made Erwin superior to himself. But in truth, it's that quality of Levi's, that deep seated empathy, that makes him the better man. He can't detach himself from his compassion, he can't make choices without considering the consequences and impact of those choices on others, or even without making that consideration the principle factor in his choices, and that's a good thing. That's humanity. That's what makes the world a better place. By caring about how our choices affect others. That's not meant to be seen as a bad thing. Levi's kindness and empathy isn't meant to be seen as wrong.

Levi never betrays who he is, and he never betrays what he believes in, even as everyone around him does, at one point or another. That's true strength, that's true courage, that's true heroism. Someone who cares so much about people that he can't make a choice without factoring in the thoughts, feelings and desires of those people. Levi is meant to be the audience's role model, the character we're meant to want to be more like. Not Erwin. Because no matter how noble the goal we pursue, if we stop caring about each other in that pursuit, it all becomes for naught.

[maretinelli]

Oiiioii vidoca, vim te pedir algo bem foffinho com o Ollie

To meio pra baixo esses dias pq não consegui entrar na faculdade e eu só queria o Ollie aqui me consolando, mas como não temos, eu me contento lendo o que você escreve perfeitamente

Beijocas❤️

Oii, querida!!! Sinto muito por não ter conseguido, espero que essa história conforte seu coraçãozinho❤️

DAWN WITH SNACKS

Ollie Bearman X Academic!fem!reader

Summary: When they are both exhausted from the day and forget to eat dinner, what makes Ollie take his girlfriend for a late-night stroll with snacks.

Words: 2.8K+

Warnings: Mentions of fast food stores, cute couple, childhood best friends to lovers, mentions of songs and romantic.

Author: English is not my first language, so apologies for any spelling, grammar and slang mistakes that may be in the story. And you can request stories on my profile. ❤️🇧🇷

MASTERLIST

The day had been tiring for both of them. Y/n spent hours at college, dealing with tests, activities and demanding practical training for the Physical Education course. Every muscle in her body seemed to protest with every step she took towards the apartment.

On the other hand, Ollie had an equally exhausting day, spending hours with his fitness trainer, dedicating himself to the maximum to be ready for the return of racing.

When Y/n finally opened the front door, it was already night. The apartment was silent, lit only by the soft light of the television. Ollie was already on the couch, showered, wearing a comfortable sweatshirt. As soon as he saw her, he gave a tired smile.

"Finally home." He commented, extending his hand to her.

Yin dropped her backpack near the door and walked over to him, throwing herself onto the couch and laying on her boyfriend's lap, letting out a long sigh. Ollie chuckled softly, running his hand through her hair, giving it a light caress.

"Tough day?" He asked, his voice calm.

"You have no idea." Y/n murmured, closing her eyes as she enjoyed the affection. "Biomechanics test first thing in the morning, then a group project that almost made me pull my hair out, and to top it off, practical weightlifting training. I swear my arms will never work again."

Ollie let out a low chuckle, his fingers sliding gently across her scalp.

"So at least now you understand how I feel after resistance training." He joked.

"I don't know... I think I'd still rather run than lift weights for hours." Y/n grumbled, snuggling deeper into his lap. "What about you? How was your day?"

"Basically being tortured by my fitness coach," Ollie said, feigning drama. "Sprints, weight training, reaction drills... and all this with him saying, 'You'll thank me for this at the next race.'"

Y/n opened one eye, looking at him with a lazy smile. "And you will?"

"Maybe." Ollie laughed. "But right now I just want to be like this with you."

They stayed there for a while, talking and enjoying each other's company. Ollie's caress of her hair almost made her fall asleep right there. But eventually, Y/n forced herself to get up.

"I'm going to take a shower before I fall asleep here." She said, stretching.

"Good idea." Ollie agreed, though his expression made it clear he didn't want her to leave his side.

Y/n chuckled softly and headed to her room, grabbing a comfortable pair of sweatpants before heading to the shower. The hot water helped relax her tired muscles, and when she returned to the living room, with her hair down and dressed in her sweatsuit, she found Ollie still on the couch, now holding the TV remote.

"Come here." He called, making room beside him and pulling back the blanket.

Y/n smiled and settled next to her boyfriend, laying her head on his chest and hugging his waist. He wrapped one arm around her, while his other hand browsed through the movies on the screen.

"How about The Princess Diaries?" He suggested, already knowing the answer.

"Again?" Y/n looked up at him with an arched eyebrow, but a smile played on her lips.

"It's your favorite." Ollie shrugged. "And I like seeing you happy."

She laughed, squeezing him into a hug. "You're such a cute boyfriend, Bearman."

"I know." He replied, smugly, which made Y/n roll her eyes.

The film began, and at first, they watched it attentively, commenting on the scenes they already knew by heart. But as time passed, the story on the screen took a back seat and the conversation between them took over.

"So, what are we going to do the weekend before the race?" Y/n asked, playing with the hem of his hoodie.

"We could go out to dinner somewhere special," Ollie suggested. "Or maybe we could make it a day just for us, no commitments, no schedules... just relaxing."

"I like that idea." She murmured. "Maybe a picnic? I'll bring the snacks, you bring your date."

"Deal." He smiled. "But only if you promise not to complain when I steal your dessert."

"No way!" Y/n laughed. "If you touch my chocolate, I revoke your right to pet me."

Ollie feigned a shocked look. "That would be cruel."

"Exactly." She said, smiling mischievously.

He chuckled, pulling her closer and kissing the top of her head. "Okay, no stealing your chocolate. But only because I like you so much."

"Great choice." Y/n replied, snuggling closer to him.

Hours had passed, and they were still on the couch, snuggled up against each other, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. The movie had already ended minutes ago, but neither of them bothered to turn off the TV.

"Did you know that otters hold hands while they sleep so they don't get lost in the water?" Ollie suddenly said, his voice calm as his fingers gently slid through Y/n's hair.

Y/n lifted her head to look at him with a smile. "Really? That's so cute."

"Yes," he confirmed. "And if an otter loses its mate, it grieves much like humans do."

She frowned, feigning a hurt look. "Why do you tell me such sad things before bed?"

Ollie laughed. "You're the one who started asking random trivia questions!"

She rolled her eyes, but smiled and snuggled back into him. A comfortable silence filled the room until Y/n murmured,

"I am hungry."

Ollie sighed, seeming to realize that he was too. "Now that you mention it... me too."

Y/n stood up slowly, grabbing her cell phone from the coffee table in the living room. "We can order something, like pizza or a burger."

Ollie raised an eyebrow, looking at the clock on the wall. "At this time? I think our favorite restaurants are already closed."

Y/n frowned and looked at her phone screen. "Oh, shit, it's late anyway..." She sighed and threw her phone on the couch. "But I don't have the energy to cook either."

Ollie thought for a second before shrugging. "We can go out and try to find an open drive-thru."

Y/n laughed at the suggestion. "Do you have any idea what you're talking about? Two athletes, one of whom is a health student, going out in the middle of the night to buy fast food? It seems wrong."

Ollie rolled his eyes playfully. "Okay, if you want I can drop you off at home and eat alone."

"No way." She replied, laughing.

He then held out his hand to her. "Then come on, let's go before I change my mind."

Y/n smiled and put on her slippers, heading to the door. "I'll wear sweatpants."

Ollie laughed. "I'll just put a sweatshirt over my pajamas."

Y/n laughed as he disappeared down the hallway, heading to his room. When he came back, he was wearing a dark green hoodie and plaid sweatpants, clearly something he would wear to bed.

She looked at him and let out a low laugh. “You really didn’t put any effort into looking presentable.”

Ollie held up the car keys with a smile. "And do you mind?"

"Not at all." She replied, still laughing.

With that, they left the apartment, ready for their little nighttime adventure in search of food.

Ollie held Y/n's hand as they walked through the building's parking lot, their steps slow and carefree. The night air was cool, and the city around them seemed to be asleep, the silence broken only by the distant sound of a few cars in the distance.

"Okay, we need to decide what we're going to eat before we go driving around aimlessly." Ollie said, shaking her hand lightly.

"Hmm... burger and fries sound like a great idea." Y/n suggested.

"I agree. But what if we find a place that has milkshakes too?" He arched an eyebrow.

"Perfect!" She smiled. "But only if you don't let me mix strawberry milkshake with chicken nuggets again. Bad experience."

Ollie laughed. "I warned you, but you wouldn't listen. Now you've learned your lesson."

She rolled her eyes, laughing, as he unlocked the car with the button on the key fob. They each got in on their own side, and Ollie started the engine, pulling out of the parking lot with no clear destination in mind, hoping to find an open drive-thru.

The city streets were quiet at that time. The streetlights illuminated the dark asphalt, and few people walked along the sidewalks. There was almost no movement, which made the walk even more pleasant. The silence of the early morning brought a sense of calm, contrasting with the hustle and bustle of the day they had.

Y/n was talking about something when suddenly the car radio started playing Wannabe by the Spice Girls.

Her eyes widened and without hesitation, she turned up the volume.

"Oh, not that song!!" Ollie exclaimed, laughing.

"That song YES!" Y/n replied excitedly.

He shook his head, still laughing. "I can't believe this song haunts me. You've embarrassed me enough with it."

"It wasn't embarrassment, it was free entertainment!" Y/n replied, laughing. "Have you already forgotten when I played that song on the speaker in the garage?"

Ollie let out a loud laugh, remembering the scene. "How could I forget? I was trying to concentrate and all of a sudden I hear 'IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER' blasting through the speakers!"

Y/n laughed.

"I was trying to get you excited for the race!"

Then, she started singing the song loudly, acting it out exaggeratedly while looking at him and making dramatic gestures.

"I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want" Y/n sings loudly. "Now it's your turn, sing, love!"

Ollie laughed and shook his head. "No way. This moment is all yours."

"Coward." She joked, but continued singing enthusiastically until the song ended. When another song came on the radio, Y/n turned the volume down and turned to him with a mischievous smile.

"I want this song at our wedding. Instead of the bride and groom's waltz, we'll dance Wannabe at the reception."

Ollie laughed out loud, nearly missing the turn. "Do you really want our wedding to be remembered like this?"

"Obviously! It's going to be iconic!"

He looked at her with a smile and shook his head. "Okay, but only if I can wear a plaid suit to go with this madness."

Y/n laughed, throwing her head back. "Deal!"

The love between the two was evident in every look, in every joke and even in the silliest moments. Since childhood, they had loved each other purely and truly, and they would continue to do so until the end of time.

After driving aimlessly for a few minutes, Ollie finally spotted an open McDonald's. He immediately turned the car into the drive-thru and smiled in satisfaction.

"I should get a prize for finding food at this hour," he joked as he stopped in line.

"Congratulations, Bearman, your trophy will be... a snack and chips." Y/n laughed, clapping exaggeratedly.

When it was their turn to order, Y/n stared at the illuminated menu for a few seconds, undecided.

"Hmm... I think I'll have a Big Mac... or a McChicken... no, wait, maybe nuggets..."

Ollie lightly banged his head on the steering wheel, laughing. "For God's sake, Y/n, are you choosing your last meal of your life?"

"This takes some thought, okay?" She countered, still studying the menu.

"Reflection?! It's McDonald's, not a five-star restaurant!"

"Do you want nuggets? Because I can change to nuggets." Y/n asked, completely ignoring his impatient tone.

"I want you to decide before morning!" Ollie joked, rolling his eyes.

She laughed and finally made the request. Ollie ordered his soon after, and within minutes they had bags of food in hand. He drove into the parking lot and parked in a quiet corner, while soft music played from the playlist they had created together.

Y/n opened the bag of fries and, without hesitation, began stealing from Ollie's tray.

"Hey!" The pilot glared at her, feigning indignation. "That's theft of private property!"

She shrugged, popping another potato into her mouth. "You should know that sharing food with me is a lifetime contract."

Ollie grabbed a potato from her tray in response. "So that's how it is? Taking justice into your own hands?"

"Exactly."

Ollie laughed and took some more of her potatoes, teasing her.

"That's not exactly an athlete's diet." Y/n commented, looking at the snack in his hands.

"We burn it all tomorrow in training, so technically this is... strategic refueling."

She laughed and they continued eating, while the conversation flowed naturally.

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe penguins see humans as strange beings who can't swim well?" Y/n said suddenly.

Ollie stared at her for a moment and then laughed. "Is that what goes through your head while eating a burger?"

"Yes. And another thing, how do fish drink water?"

He arched an eyebrow. "Y/n, for God's sake..."

"No, seriously! They're already in the water, but do they need to drink?"

Ollie thought for a moment and shrugged. "I don't know... maybe they do? Or maybe they absorb it through the skin?"

"That makes sense... wait, do you have dehydrated fish?"

He laughed. "If they do, I hope they find a water McDonald's to solve the problem."

They continued talking about random theories, mixed with childhood memories and inside jokes. Time passed without them noticing, and soon the snacks were gone.

Now, with the empty packages, they sat there in the car, enjoying the calm of the night. The comfortable silence between them was filled only by the soft music from the playlist, as they exchanged knowing looks and discreet smiles.

They didn't need big moments to feel happy together. Just each other's company was enough.

When the next song started playing, Ollie recognized the first few chords immediately. Talking To The Moon, by Bruno Mars. A smile appeared on his face, and he raised the volume a little, turning to Y/n.

"You know... that song made me realize that I was in love with you years ago." He said, his voice soft, full of affection. "Every time I heard it, I remembered you..."

Y/n blinked a few times in surprise before smiling. "Why that song?"

Ollie sighed lightly, as if he was reliving that moment.

"Because whenever I was away, traveling to races, you found a way to text me, to ask how I was doing, even with the time difference and your crazy schedule. You always made sure to be there, to support me, even when the whole world seemed too busy to care."

Y/n blushed slightly, lowering her head and playing with the hem of her sweatshirt.

"I'm so lucky to have you in my life." Ollie continued, his eyes fixed on her. "And dating my childhood best friend? That's the best gift I could ever ask for."

Y/n looked up at him, her eyes shining with tenderness. Without saying anything, she smiled and leaned in slightly, her lips meeting his in a sweet, lingering kiss. Ollie brought a hand to her face, deepening the kiss with affection, feeling the comfortable warmth of that moment.

When they pulled away, he smiled and placed a kiss on her cheek, while Y/n leaned back against the car seat again, letting out a yawn.

"See? You're too old to be out this late." Ollie laughed.

"Hey, I'm only 20!" She retorted, rolling her eyes but laughing.

On the way back, the atmosphere in the car was calm, a comfortable silence filled with low music and the good tiredness after a fun night.

Y/n put her feet up on the dashboard and sighed. "That was one of the simplest, but also one of the most wonderful moments we've ever had together."

Ollie smiled, agreeing. "Sometimes impromptu nights are the best."

As soon as they entered the apartment, Y/n let out another yawn and practically threw herself on the couch.

"I could sleep easy here right now," she murmured, burying her face in the pillow.

Ollie locked the door and laughed, approaching her. Without warning, he lay on top of her back, making Y/n let out a little cry of protest.

"OLIVER! Get off me!" She laughed, trying to push him away.

"No, it's comfortable here." He teased, but soon rolled to the side, pulling her into a hug.

Y/n snuggled against his chest, feeling the warmth of Ollie's body.

"You know what? I could sleep here easily too," he said, his voice already a little sleepy.

"So that's what we're going to do." Y/n muttered, closing her eyes for a moment.

Ollie got up quickly, turned off the lights in the apartment and went back to the couch, arranging the blankets for the two of them. As soon as they lay down again, he hugged her from behind, fitting his face in the crook of her neck.

"Good night, my walking insomnia." He whispered, smiling.

Y/n chuckled softly. "Good evening, my favorite pilot."

Little by little, the silence of the night enveloped them both, until they finally fell asleep, cuddled together on the couch, as if that moment were the most natural thing in the world. And maybe it was. After all, they didn't need anything other than each other to feel at home.

[kotton-kandy953]

❏ 𝐓𝐄𝐘𝐕𝐀𝐓 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇 𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐋 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑 !

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🔪 love interest ꒱ . . . yandere ! k. kazuha ! high school ! au x fem ! reader

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🔪 format ꒱ . . . headcannons

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🔪 warnings ꒱ . . . obsessive themes, stalking, yandere themes

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🔪 authors note ꒱ . . . I love kazuha so, so, so much omgggg || teyvat high school simulator homepage!

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🔪 word count ꒱ . . . 0.4k

Kaedehara Kazuha always has this dreamy, almost romantic look in his beautiful, red eyes as he daydreams. His cheek resting in his bandaged palm as he watches the autumn leaves fall from the tall trees out the window. Well, when he’s not gazing over at your elegant figure, that is.

Kazuha always carries around this old, ruled, notebook he uses daily to write down different poems, haikus or whatever he feels is right. A majority of them being love poems addressed to an anonymous recipient named, “my love” or “darling.”

Unbeknownst to you, his “love” he just adores writing to is you.

If he ever dared muster up the courage, he would gladly give you every single poem he has expressing his undying, and quite obsessive, love for you. But that may never come to be.

On the topic of his poems for you, the first ones would start off simple. Almost as if you were fascinating to him, in a way. Despite him not ever calling you out by name, by the way he explicitly described you, you could instantly decipher who he was talking about.

Once Kazuha began to fall in love, to fall hard, actually, his poems became more romantic. Describing his feelings as almost obsessive, knowing a bit more information about you than you’d feel comfortable with another classmate knowing.

Actually, Kazuha loves poetry so much that he began a poetry club at school, making himself the president. Sometimes, he’ll even ask you to proofread some of his works. Obviously not the poems he dedicated to you, because if you ever found out how obsessed he is with you… he prefers not to think of the outcome.

If he ever notices you a friend of his struggling in a subject, he would gladly help you out. Because of his kind personality and soft voice, he’s a great tutor.

When having to write an essay or speech, he’ll use big words, phrases that most people don’t understand.

He takes band (with Xiao) and plays the flute, a wood WIND instrument.

His favorite classes are English and Social Studies/History.

Kazuha is an overall well behaved student, he’s polite and kind to whoever he comes across. But when he’s jealous, it’s a totally different thing. Everyone knows that… disposing of someone permanently is really bad. So why does that thought refuse to leave his mind?

No matter what words he jots down into his notebook filled with poety, his raging jealousy relentlessly eats away at his already deteriorating sanity.

Nevertheless, he shouldn’t be afraid to get a little blood on his hands for his darling, right?

Kazuha doesn’t like the idea of “stalking” you. Believes that everyone should respect your each other’s privacy. Nevertheless, he will watch you from afar while you’re out alone in public. He has to make sure you return home safely every afternoon!

What would he ever do with himself if he never saw you again?

[cinnam0nic3girl]

Guide to Cultivating a Love for Reading

Reading can be a fulfilling and enriching activity, but for some, it may feel like a chore. Whether you're trying to develop a reading habit or rekindle your passion for books.

1. Find the Right Genre

Explore different genres such as fiction, non-fiction, fantasy, mystery, or self-help to find what excites you.

Think about your interests and hobbies, and choose books that align with them.

Don’t hesitate to step out of your comfort zone and try something new.

2. Start Small

Begin with shorter books, novellas, or even articles to ease into the habit.

Set manageable reading goals, such as a chapter a day.

Gradually increase the length and complexity of what you read.

3. Create a Cozy Reading Environment

Find a comfortable, quiet spot where you can read without distractions.

Enhance your reading experience with soft lighting, a cozy blanket, or a warm drink.

Experiment with different settings like reading at a park or in a library.

4. Make Reading a Daily Habit

Set aside a specific time each day for reading, such as before bed or during your commute.

Replace screen time with reading to gradually integrate it into your routine.

Use a reading tracker or journal to monitor your progress.

5. Join a Reading Community

Engage with book clubs, online reading groups, or forums to share thoughts and recommendations.

Discussing books with others can make reading more enjoyable and motivating.

Follow book influencers or join social media platforms dedicated to reading.

6. Choose the Right Format

Experiment with different formats such as audiobooks, e-books, or physical books.

Audiobooks can be a great way to enjoy books while multitasking.

Find what format works best for your lifestyle and preferences.

7. Read What You Enjoy, Not What You "Should"

Don’t feel pressured to read classics or trending books if they don't interest you.

Give yourself permission to stop reading a book if you’re not enjoying it.

Focus on finding stories that captivate and inspire you.

8. Incorporate Reading into Your Interests

Read books related to your hobbies, career goals, or favorite movies and TV shows.

Look for adaptations of your favorite stories to see how they compare.

Explore graphic novels or illustrated books for a different experience.

9. Set Personal Challenges

Create reading challenges, such as reading a certain number of books per year.

Participate in themed reading months or literary events.

Reward yourself for achieving your reading goals.

10. Be Patient and Persistent

Developing a love for reading takes time and effort.

Don’t get discouraged if it feels slow; enjoy the process.

Celebrate small wins and keep exploring new books.

[acute-crashout-jeyuso]

Checkmate: a jhea fanfic. (Book 3 of 3: BTR Series)

Chapter 13: Orange Soda

Special shoutout to @cheappop @xxjheaxx @maineventabbey @love4brutality @xxwhatcouldhavebeenxx

Flashback - June 26th, 2025

LaKota Oaks, Hall A. 6:24 PM.

Jon stood confidently at the podium, his smile wide as he addressed the audience. The room, filled with donors, philanthropists, and well-wishers, buzzed with a quiet sense of anticipation. The sparkling chandeliers overhead cast a soft glow on the elegant décor of the venue. Jon was dressed impeccably in a tailored suit, his usual confident demeanor amplified by the significance of the evening.

He cleared his throat, his voice commanding yet warm. “I usually don’t do stuff like this,” Jon began, his eyes sweeping over the crowd of distinguished guests. “But on behalf of the Demi Fatu Foundation, I would like to thank each and every one of you for coming out tonight.”

A ripple of applause echoed through the hall, and Jon smiled, nodding in appreciation. He paused, allowing the moment to settle before continuing.

“Tonight, with your incredible contributions, we have raised $6.8 million dollars.” The applause grew louder, with many of the attendees rising to their feet in support of the foundation’s mission. Jon looked toward the back of the stage, his gaze shifting toward the figure who had inspired it all.

“Now, if I could, I’d like to invite the heart and soul of this foundation, Demi Fatu, to join me up here,” Jon said, his voice filled with reverence.

The spotlight flickered, drawing attention to Rhea, who was sitting at a table near the back. She smiled gently as she rose from her seat, her presence commanding as she waved graciously to the room. She moved toward the stage with the help of Joe, who supported her as she made her way to the podium. Her movements were graceful, but her eyes carried the weight of all she had overcome. She reached the stage, her figure bathed in the soft light.

Rhea took the stand with quiet strength, her eyes scanning the crowd of faces eager to hear her speak. She stood at the microphone, pausing for a moment to gather her thoughts as the applause slowly faded. Her hands rested lightly on the podium. It was evident that she had fought hard to be here tonight.

“Thank you, Jon,” she said, her voice smooth and steady, though there was a hint of emotion just beneath the surface. “And thank you to everyone who has made this evening possible. Your support means the world to me.”

The room was silent, hanging on her every word. Rhea continued, her tone more serious as she shared the foundation’s mission.

“The Demi Fatu Foundation is dedicated to helping troubled youth, those who have suffered at the hands of violence, neglect, and abuse. Our work is focused on those who have been victims of sexual trafficking, offering them a chance at a new life—one where they can heal, find hope, and build their future. Every dollar you’ve contributed tonight will go directly into providing those victims with the support they need to start over.”

A wave of emotion swept over the room, the audience visibly moved by the heartfelt message. Rhea’s eyes shone with determination, but there was also vulnerability in her expression as she spoke of the cause so close to her heart.

“We all have the power to make a difference,” she continued, her voice growing stronger with each word. “The more we give, the more lives we can change. And together, we can create a world where the victims of these horrors no longer have to suffer in silence.”

The crowd, touched by her words, erupted in applause. It was a standing ovation—one filled with admiration, respect, and gratitude for the woman who had fought through her own darkness to emerge as a beacon of hope for others.

As the applause began to die down, Rhea stepped back slightly from the podium, taking a deep breath as she glanced out into the sea of faces, feeling a profound connection to each person in the room. She knew the road ahead would still be full of challenges, but tonight, she felt as though she had finally found her purpose—one that would carry her through whatever obstacles life still had in store.

Joe and Jon carefully guided Rhea off the stage, their movements protective yet unspoken, as if shielding her from the weight of the world. The energy in the room still crackled with admiration for her speech, murmurs of praise floating through the crowd.

As they reached their table, Rhea settled into her seat with a quiet sigh, smoothing her dress over her lap. She turned to Joe, offering him a small but sincere smile.

“Thank you for making the trip out here,” she said softly.

Joe waved a dismissive hand, shaking his head. “Come on now, you know I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” His tone was gruff, but there was warmth in his eyes.

Jon leaned back in his chair, exhaling as he glanced around the opulent hall. “It’s a shame Jey couldn’t be here,” he commented, his voice carrying a note of something between understanding and disappointment.

Rhea didn’t miss the subtle weight behind his words. She tilted her head slightly before responding. “He’s off being a bona fide superstar,” she said with a small smirk, though the flicker of something unreadable crossed her expression for just a second.

Jon hummed, nodding. “Yeah. That boy’s been on a roll lately.”

Before the conversation could go any further, a waitress approached their table, her presence poised and professional. The name tag pinned to her crisp black uniform read Ashanti. She held a small notepad, pen poised between her fingers.

“Good evening, would you like anything to drink?” she asked politely, her eyes scanning between the three of them.

Joe glanced up first, offering a charming smile. “A glass of wine,” he requested smoothly.

Jon lifted a hand slightly. “Beer for me.”

Ashanti turned her attention to Rhea, who instinctively rested a hand over her midsection, a small protective gesture.

“A Sprite will do,” Rhea said with a gentle smile.

The waitress nodded, scribbling down their orders. “Of course. I’ll be right back.” She disappeared seamlessly into the crowd, leaving the trio in a moment of quiet.

Joe leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table as his sharp gaze flickered between Jon and Rhea. “So,” he began, his tone carrying the weight of something more serious beneath the casual exterior, “how you holding up, sis?”

Rhea met his eyes, her fingers tracing absent patterns on the edge of the tablecloth. “I’m good,” she answered, though it came a little too quick. She cleared her throat, adjusting in her seat. “Tonight’s been… important.”

Jon studied her, his expression unreadable. “You sure?”

Rhea exhaled through her nose, offering a small but genuine nod. “Yeah.” Then, her lips curled up just slightly. “Besides, if I wasn’t, I’m pretty sure you two would be the first to call me out on it.”

Joe smirked. “Damn right.”

The drinks arrived moments later, Ashanti setting them down with a graceful efficiency. As the three lifted their glasses—Joe and Jon in toast, Rhea in quiet amusement—there was an unspoken understanding between them. The night wasn’t just about the money raised or the cause being championed.

It was about Rhea reclaiming something—her voice, her purpose.

And despite the miles that separated them tonight, Jey was still a part of it. Whether he knew it or not.

Rhea adjusted the fabric of her dress as she rose with Joe and Jon’s help, her movements slow but steady. At this stage in her pregnancy, every step carried a heaviness, but she still held herself with quiet strength.

Dom, one of her most trusted assistants within the Demi Fatu Foundation, had just informed her that the winners of the highly anticipated meet-and-greet had arrived. Rhea gave him a nod of appreciation before glancing between Joe and Jon.

“Guess we better not keep them waiting,” she said lightly, a hint of amusement in her tone.

Joe smirked, adjusting the cuff of his blazer. “Let’s make someone’s night, then.”

Jon nodded, his expression relaxed as he walked beside them, keeping a watchful eye on Rhea as they maneuvered through the grand dining hall.

As they approached the designated area, two women stood eagerly near the reception table, their faces lighting up at the sight of the trio. The excitement in their eyes was unmistakable, the kind that only came from meeting idols they had long admired.

The taller of the two stepped forward first, her hands clasped together. “Oh my God, this is unreal,” she breathed, eyes darting between them. “I’m Maki.”

The other woman, just as overwhelmed but radiating excitement, quickly introduced herself. “And I’m Abbey! It’s so amazing to meet you all.”

Rhea smiled warmly, taking in their enthusiasm. “It’s great to meet you both,” she said, reaching out carefully to shake their hands despite her limited mobility. “You guys excited for tonight?”

Maki nodded quickly. “More than you know! This foundation means so much to us. What you’re doing—giving a voice to victims, helping those in need—it’s incredible.”

Abbey chimed in, her voice filled with sincerity. “We’ve been following everything since you started the foundation, and it’s been so inspiring.”

Rhea’s heart swelled at their words, a deep appreciation settling in her chest. Despite the chaos that often surrounded her life, moments like this reminded her why she fought so hard for this cause.

Joe, ever the charmer, grinned at them. “Well, I gotta say, you picked a hell of a night to be here. Six-point-eight million raised? That’s history right there.”

Jon clapped a hand on Rhea’s shoulder, nodding toward Maki and Abbey. “And that’s all because of her.”

Rhea shook her head modestly. “Because of all of us. This is bigger than just me.”

Maki and Abbey exchanged a glance, their admiration evident. Abbey hesitated for a second before speaking again. “Can we—uh, would it be okay if we got a picture with you guys?”

Rhea chuckled. “Of course.”

Joe gestured toward Dom, who immediately stepped forward to take the photo. As the five of them gathered together, Maki and Abbey stood between their idols, their joy unmistakable.

As the camera flashed, capturing the moment forever, Rhea felt something shift inside her—a reminder of how far she had come, of the impact she was making.

And despite everything, despite the past and the battles she still had to fight, she felt whole.

—

June 27th, 2025 2:42 PM

Rhea stood in the kitchen, carefully assembling her sandwich. Her movements were slower now, the weight of her pregnancy making even the simplest tasks feel like a workout. Still, there was an undeniable warmth in her heart as she thought about how soon she would finally be holding baby Jeyson in her arms.

Taking a slow bite, she leaned against the kitchen counter, her eyes drifting toward the large glass doors leading to the backyard. Outside, a team from Shep’s Pool Perfections was putting the paint on the custom-built pool and waterfall feature.

Once Jeyson was here, she planned to start gentle water exercises with him. Nothing too intense—just small bonding moments in the water, a way to ease back into movement while also introducing her son to something she loved.

She placed her half-eaten sandwich down and rubbed her belly absentmindedly. “Not long now, little one,” she murmured, feeling a small but firm kick in response.

A deep chuckle came from behind her. “That boy is already active as hell,” Joe’s voice rang out as he stepped into the kitchen, eyeing her with amusement.

Rhea smirked, turning slightly to face him. “Takes after his dad.”

Joe leaned against the fridge, arms crossed. “Or his mom. You were out here lifting weights until damn near five months.”

Rhea rolled her eyes playfully. “Had to make sure I stayed strong.”

Joe studied her for a moment, his usual playful demeanor softening. “You doing okay?”

She exhaled, nodding as she ran her fingers over the edge of the counter. “Yeah… just ready. Ready for him to be here. Ready to hold him.” Her voice dropped slightly. “Ready for Jey to be here, too.”

Joe’s gaze darkened just a fraction, but he didn’t say anything immediately. Instead, he reached for a banana from the fruit bowl and peeled it slowly. “You know he’ll be here, right?”

Rhea looked away, focusing on the pool outside. “Yeah,” she said, though the uncertainty still clung to her words.

Joe chewed thoughtfully before speaking again. “That man loves you, Demi. No matter what’s happened, no matter what’s still gonna happen, he’ll always come back to you.”

Rhea swallowed hard, her fingers instinctively tightening against the counter.

She hoped he was right. Because as the days inched closer to her due date, the only thing she wanted more than Jeyson in her arms… was Jey by her side.

Galina appeared at the top of the stairs, her soft footsteps echoing as she descended to the main level. Her eyes sparkled with the same energy Rhea had come to admire, even in moments of exhaustion. She and Joe had decided to stay with Rhea for the next couple of days until Jey got back, and then all four of them would fly out to Texas for their Fourth of July trip. It was the light at the end of a long tunnel for Rhea—getting away with the people she trusted most.

Galina smiled warmly as she reached the kitchen. “Are you okay today, mamas?” she asked gently, noticing the slightly exhausted look on Rhea’s face.

Rhea, her hand resting on her swollen belly, gave a half-smile in response. “He keeps kicking me so much,” she sighed, her voice tinged with a mix of exhaustion and amusement.

Galina let out a laugh, her tone light. “Imagine, giving birth to twins. Double the kicks, mamas.”

Rhea’s eyes widened at the thought, and she couldn’t help but chuckle. “I don’t know how you and Trinity did it. This little one is already giving me a run for my money.”

Joe, who had been leaning casually against the counter, smirked at the conversation. “I did all the work,” he quipped, a playful twinkle in his eye as he glanced over at Rhea.

Galina shot him a glare, her expression amused but also a bit incredulous. “You did all the work, huh?” she said, raising an eyebrow. “That’s funny, because last time I checked, you didn’t carry the weight, literally.”

Joe shrugged, his grin widening. “Hey, I provided the right environment,” he teased.

Rhea couldn’t help but laugh, the sound filling the kitchen. “You two are something else,” she muttered, shaking her head.

Galina, still giving Joe a mock side-eye, turned back to Rhea, her face softening. “But seriously, how are you holding up? I know it’s been tough with everything going on.”

Rhea paused, her hand resting on her belly once more. “I’m managing. The pain’s there, but it’s nothing compared to the excitement. I just want him here… and Jey. I miss him so much.”

Galina’s expression softened. She stepped forward, gently rubbing Rhea’s shoulder. “He’ll be back soon, mamas. You know Jey’s got this.”

Rhea nodded, her eyes glistening for a moment before she blinked away the emotion. “I hope so.”

Galina squeezed her shoulder and glanced at Joe, who had been silently watching the exchange. “We’ll be here for you. Whatever you need. You’re not alone in this.”

Rhea smiled faintly, appreciating the support but still feeling that aching void Jey’s absence had created.

—

June 28th, 2025 01:21 AM

A loud, urgent banging on the front door jolted Rhea awake. Her heart pounded in her chest as she groggily pushed herself up, blinking against the darkness. Barry and Bella, her protective dogs, stirred beside her, their ears perked up at the sudden disturbance. Storm, her cat, remained curled up at the foot of the bed, unfazed.

She glanced at the clock on the nightstand. 1:21 AM.

“Who the hell—” she mumbled, rubbing her belly before swinging her legs off the bed. At nearly eight months pregnant, every movement was slow and calculated. She grabbed her robe, pulling it over her body before waddling downstairs.

Approaching the door, she peeked through the peephole and frowned when she saw an officer standing outside. Her stomach tightened with unease. Taking a steadying breath, she unlocked the door and pulled it open.

The moment she did, a familiar figure lunged forward, wrapping his arms around her.

“Mommy!”

Rhea instinctively held onto Jaciyah, her stepson, as he buried his face into her neck. Confused, she looked up at the officer.

“Ma’am, is this your son?” he asked, though the answer was clear from the way Jaciyah clung to her.

Rhea exhaled. “He practically is, but technically, he’s my stepson. What’s going on?”

Jaciyah grinned, looking up at her with dilated eyes. “Uno, dos, tres, cuatro!”

Rhea blinked, realization dawning on how the officer got into the property. Jaciyah’s assigned gate code.

She shot him a glare but turned back to the officer. “What happened?”

The officer sighed, adjusting his stance. “We found him and his girlfriend trespassing inside one of the model homes up the street. Seems they took some ecstasy before breaking in and, well… let’s just say they did quite a bit of damage.”

Rhea’s jaw clenched. “Are you charging him?”

The officer shook his head. “No, the homeowner isn’t pressing charges since the house was scheduled for demolition anyway. But ma’am, I need you to understand—taking ecstasy at his age is like taking ice cream scoops out of his developing brain.”

Rhea pursed her lips as she glanced at Jaciyah, who was now absentmindedly playing with the tie of her robe. His fingers tugged at the soft fabric, his expression dreamy.

“Mommy, it’s so soft,” he murmured.

Rhea resisted the urge to groan. She turned back to the officer with a tight nod. “Yeah, ice cream scoops. Got it. Believe me, my husband is going to handle this.”

The officer gave her a sympathetic look before tipping his hat. “Good luck with that. Have a good night, ma’am.”

Rhea shut the door and locked it before turning to Jaciyah, who was still swaying slightly.

“Alright, kid. You need to sit your ass down before you fall over.”

Jaciyah gasped dramatically. “Wait! The orange soda! Mommy, please!” His voice was desperate, as if the world would end if he didn’t get it.

Rhea pinched the bridge of her nose. She was too pregnant for this shit.

Joe and Galina came down the stairs, both looking groggy but alert. Joe was already pulling a T-shirt over his head while Galina rubbed her eyes, still in her satin robe.

“What the hell is going on?” Joe grumbled, his voice thick with sleep.

Rhea exhaled, gesturing toward Jaciyah, who was now sitting cross-legged on the couch, mumbling to himself about how good orange soda was for the soul.

“This one right here,” Rhea began, arms crossed over her chest, “decided to take ecstasy, break into a model home with his little girlfriend, and get himself escorted home by the damn police.”

Galina’s mouth fell open. “Oh, you have got to be kidding me.”

Joe slowly turned his head toward his nephew, his expression unreadable. He studied Jaciyah for a long moment before exhaling through his nose.

“Alright,” Joe muttered, rolling his shoulders. “I got this.”

Rhea arched a brow. “You sure?”

Joe gave her a look. “This is a Fatu boy. I know how to handle this.”

Without another word, he strode over to the couch and grabbed Jaciyah by the back of his hoodie, yanking him up to his feet.

Jaciyah barely reacted, still grinning. “Uncle Joe! I love you, man. You’re like, so big. Have you ever looked at your hands? Like, really looked at them? I saw on twitter that everyone is obsessed with your hands. Why is that? Is it a sex thing?”

Joe deadpanned. “Boy, if you don’t shut your high ass up—”

Rhea bit her lip to keep from laughing. Galina shook her head and muttered, “He is definitely Jey’s son.”

Joe dragged Jaciyah toward the staircase. “We’re gonna have a little talk, kid.”

Jaciyah gasped. “Is it about orange soda?”

Joe didn’t answer. He just kept walking.

“IT HAS TO BE ABOUT ORANGE SODA?!”

Rhea and Galina stood in silence for a beat before Galina turned to her.

“You sure you don’t want twins?” she teased.

Rhea groaned. “I think three Fatu boys is more than enough.”

—

8:42 AM

Joe and Galina stood outside near the driveway as Takecia pulled up, her expression already tight with frustration. Jaciyah, still groggy from the night before, let out an exhausted sigh as he stepped toward his mother.

The moment he was within reach, Takecia smacked the back of his head—not too hard, but just enough to make her point. “What the hell were you thinking, Jaciyah?” she scolded, her voice sharp. “Breaking into a damn house? Taking drugs? Are you out of your damn mind?”

Jaciyah winced, rubbing the back of his head. “Ma, chill—”

“Chill?!” Takecia’s eyes blazed. “Boy, do you know what could’ve happened to you? Do you even care? You could’ve ended up dead, Jaciyah! Or arrested! And here I am, getting a damn call in the middle of the night because my son wants to act like he ain’t got no damn sense?”

Joe crossed his arms, staying out of it for now. This was her moment to handle her son, and judging by the way she was going in on him, he wasn’t about to interrupt.

Jaciyah sighed, shifting uncomfortably. “I wasn’t tryna do all that—”

“Oh, so you just accidentally broke into a house?” Takecia snapped. “You just accidentally popped ecstasy? Explain that to me, genius!”

Jaciyah looked away, his jaw tight. He was in deep shit, and he knew it.

Takecia shook her head, her anger simmering into something else—disappointment. “I swear, Jaciyah… you ain’t got no idea how much we fight for you. How much your dad fights for you.” She glanced toward the house, knowing damn well Rhea was too drained to deal with this right now. “You got a whole family that loves you, and this is what you do?”

Silence. Jaciyah wouldn’t meet her gaze.

Takecia exhaled, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Get in the car,” she muttered.

Jaciyah hesitated for a moment before finally sliding into the passenger seat.

Takecia turned to Joe and Galina. “Tell Rhea I said thanks… and I’m sorry she had to deal with this.”

Joe nodded. “She understands. She’s just tired.”

Takecia’s face softened slightly. “I know. She doesn’t need this stress right now.” She glanced at the house once more before sighing. “I got it from here.”

Without another word, she got into the driver’s seat, and the car pulled away.

Galina let out a deep breath, shaking her head. “Damn. That kid’s lucky his mom got him and not his dad.”

Joe smirked slightly. “Yeah… Jey would’ve torn his ass up.”

Rhea sat comfortably on the couch, her hand gently stroking Bartholomew, the guinea pig, who rested on her large, swollen belly. The guinea pig’s mews echoed through the room, his little body shifting with each sound, almost as if in sync with the gentle movements of baby Jeyson inside her. Despite the peacefulness of the moment, Rhea couldn’t shake the overwhelming exhaustion that had become her constant companion. The pregnancy, though a blessing, had drained her physically and emotionally.

Joe and Galina stepped into the room, their footsteps light as they approached Rhea. Joe’s face was etched with a quiet sadness, the weight of the last few weeks heavy on his shoulders. He looked at Rhea with concern, but also with a glimmer of determination in his eyes.

“How about I do something for all of us?” Joe suggested, his voice soft, almost as if he wasn’t sure if she’d accept.

Galina raised an eyebrow, her arms crossing in a skeptical but affectionate manner. “What could you possibly do that would make this day turn around?” she asked, her tone playful yet tinged with curiosity.

Joe smirked, clearly undeterred by her skepticism. “Just trust me.”

TWO HOURS LATER

The atmosphere had completely shifted. Rhea now found herself in a serene, private spa room, the soft glow of candles casting gentle shadows against the walls. The sounds of calm, flowing water mixed with soothing music, creating an atmosphere of complete tranquility. The air was riddled with peace, the worries of the outside world momentarily forgotten.

Rhea lay on a special table designed for pregnant women, her body sinking into the plush surface. The soft, heated warmth of the table began to relax her tense muscles almost immediately, allowing her to sink further into the comfort it provided. Her belly, round and heavy with the impending birth of baby Jeyson, rested comfortably on the pillow designed to support expectant mothers.

Joe and Galina had been ushered onto their own tables, their therapists already working on their tired muscles. Rhea closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift, the sensation of skilled hands massaging her feet and back a welcomed release. Each stroke, each press of pressure, seemed to ease the years of stress and strain that had built up in her body over the course of her pregnancy. It was a feeling she hadn’t realized how desperately she needed.

“I love you so much, Joseph Leati Anoa’i,” Galina whispered, her voice full of affection as she let herself relax into the massage. The words were simple, but the sincerity behind them was clear.

Rhea, still lost in the moment of pure relaxation, smiled softly. “I second that,” she murmured, her voice carrying the last remnants as the exhaustion and tension in her body melted away.

Joe, his body relaxed under the expert hands of the therapist, raised a hand in a quiet gesture. “No talking,” he said playfully, though his voice carried a hint of authority. It was clear that he was thoroughly enjoying the luxury of peace and relaxation.

Rhea and Galina shared a quiet laugh, the tension of their lives momentarily forgotten in the soothing atmosphere of the room. The therapists continued their work on all three of them, effortlessly gliding their hands over tired muscles, ensuring that each moment was filled with pure comfort.

—

After their relaxing afternoon, the trio made their way back to the house, their spirits lifted by the soothing massage and the calm of the day. As Joe approached the gate, he leaned in to input the familiar code. The large iron gate creaked open, and Joe slowly drove up the long driveway, the tires crunching over the gravel. Galina helped a very pregnant Rhea out of the car, her movements slow but steady as they made their way up to the house. Rhea’s growing belly seemed to be taking all her energy, but her smile never faltered as she leaned on Galina for support.

When they reached the door, Rhea’s eyes lit up as she caught sight of someone sitting at the breakfast bar. The warm glow of the kitchen light illuminated the figure, and the familiar sound of Jey’s voice reached her ears.

“Hey, button nose,” Jey greeted, his voice filled with affection.

Rhea’s heart fluttered at the sight of him. She hadn’t expected him to be there. Her exhaustion and pregnancy aches seemed to melt away in an instant as she smiled brightly. Jey, sitting casually at the breakfast bar, had a bouquet of sunflowers resting beside him, the vibrant yellow petals a beautiful contrast to the soft colors of the room.

He quickly stood up and crossed the room, his strong arms pulling Rhea into a tender kiss. The kiss was filled with relief and longing, the kind that only came from being apart for too long. Rhea sighed against him, her heart feeling lighter with every passing second.

“I thought you wouldn’t be back till next week,” Rhea said, a note of surprise and relief in her voice. Her exhaustion from the past few days faded as she sank into his embrace.

Jey grinned, his usual teasing nature coming through. “Rewrites in storyline,” he said with a wink. “Took a massive ‘chair assault’ from Dominik, and now I’m here with you, babe!” He pulled back just enough to look her in the eyes, a mischievous glint in his gaze.

Galina, who had been quietly watching from the sidelines, chimed in with a grin. “Good, she was missing you!” She crossed her arms, an affectionate smirk on her face as she looked at the two of them.

Rhea laughed softly, her hands resting on her belly as she looked up at Jey. “It’s been too long,” she admitted. “I’m so happy you’re here.”

Jey smiled warmly at her, his hand resting gently on her rounded belly. “I couldn’t stay away, babe. Not with you and baby Jeyson here.” His tone softened, and he kissed her forehead lightly.

Galina rolled her eyes, though she was smiling. “Always the drama,” she teased, but it was clear that her words were filled with affection.

“Thanks for being here, Jey,” Rhea said, her voice softening. “It means everything to me.”

Jey nodded, his expression serious now. “Always, Rhea. I’m not going anywhere.”

With the sunflowers still resting on the counter beside them, the trio stood there for a moment, enjoying the calm, the comfort of being together again. Jey’s presence in the house filled the space with warmth, and Rhea felt a deep sense of peace she hadn’t realized she was missing until now.

Authors note: I realize that some of you don’t understand the trajection or my reasoning for writing the chapters that I write. What I am doing right now is establishing the life before everything stopped. I’m building up to the moment where everything comes into fruition and plays out. I always encourage questions if you can’t understand anything. I also encourage comments because they are essentially what drives me to write. But I hope you all are loving the story so far.!

Also here is a small character analysis I wrote for Rhea and why she lies: Rhea’s consistent lies about her past to Jey stem from a combination of fear, shame, and a need for control. She fears rejection or judgment if her true history is revealed, believing that it could shatter their relationship and the fresh start she desires with him. By concealing her past, she attempts to protect both herself and Jey from the pain that could arise, maintaining a sense of emotional safety and control. Her lies also reflect a deeper self-sabotaging fear of loss, where she believes that if Jey knew everything, he would leave. Ultimately, her lies are a coping mechanism to safeguard her relationship and shield herself from vulnerability.

[nanananana-chaos]

steve who likes cars a lot when hes young, tinkers with them when tommy gets one for his fifteenth birthday and starts fully dedicating to learn everything about the bimmer he gets for his own birthday. helps eddie out with the van, and mike when he inherits the station wagon, and even wayne on more than a few occasions. becomes mechanic after family video bc its something he always liked and was always good at. his dad HATES it at first but starts respecting it when he learns how good steve is at his job, how well known he is, how respected. they start patching up family ties even if steve is still hesitant towards it.

eddie who got discovered at his job in (insert local supermarket) after he graduates but not bc of his music talent but by how good at numbers he was, got a better job as a junior accountant, and started learning more and more because the pay was also increasing and now he can help out with wayne and then some and money has never came easy to a munson, and this is something he's really good at without much effort

they're together, have been for a little over eleven years now went through a looooot of shit together hiding who they are to each other from most of the world but not all, who've been through the harsh and desperate moments and saw each others ugliest sides and still chose to love and care for each other. were just starting to enjoy their boringly stable life when steve's grandpa dies and leaves him a SUBSTANTIAL amount and then steve just buys out the garage he works at from (one sillable named character) and hires ed to do the numbers for him with him because hes done having to hide his man like that and then they live happily ever after etcetera

[artdisease]

boyfriend!gojo hcs

Reposting these from my Google Docs + Twitter, this is my first time posting here so enjoy....ahaha.

satoru as a boyfriend/husband would be so supportive of you (basically rooting for you 24/7 no matter what, he’s pretty much your number one fan) along with being clingy, loving, caring as well despite teasing you (affectionately maybe)

boyfriend/husband!gojo would also be dedicated to you no matter what, he is loyal to you and you only.

holiday-related but boyfriend satoru holding up a mistletoe above the two of you while having a smirk present on his face, dangling it and waiting for you to kiss him

boyfriend!gojo seeing you work on things you need to get done and then gets all pouty when he wants all of your attention on him, trying many ways to do so such as gently poking your cheek, wrapping his arms around you from behind and then lastly sitting on your lap before you give in

boyfriend!gojo rubbing against and nuzzling into your face gently while the two of you are sitting next to each other and with him wanting to be cuddly and clingy.

boyfriend!gojo giving you love bites/hickeys around your neck plus including the collarbones while also biting your cheek gently, he loves that.

he also LOVES getting kisses from you everywhere on his body, he'd even giggle while having this huge grin on his face that you just wanna kiss it off him

i may do a part two of this if i find more but i hope you guys enjoy these :]

[del-stars]

what r ur top 3 worst most painful traumatizing sirius black ships

love this ask love your mind

sirius x barty. of course. definitely the worst. this traumatises him for months afterward. it's 6 years later and he's still laying awake at night thinking abt the shit barty did to him (the shit he did to barty is not much better but hey there's no use lingering on the past!). like peak situationshipcore, peak principle of least caring, peak toxicity. i adore them. they hate each other

age gap professor xeno x grad student sirius mmmm yummy bc theyre insane. xeno using sirius as his little experiment and essentially becoming a one-man cult dedicated to him... toxic in the sense that sirius' ego becomes truly out of this world. unbeatable. and why wouldnt it when you have a brilliant, published, tenured professor telling you you're the best thing to walk this earth.... toxic for xeno because sirius graduates and moves away and then he kinda loses his mind

some good ole fashioned saintstar. i think this one is traumatising bc like. it's both of their first real relationships. and they both do like each other. so it should work, but it doesn't. they drive each other up the wall. it gets to a point where mary can't even look at sirius without picking a fight, and sirius can't look at mary without being irritated by something. they're too alike, their personalities are both very similar and they are both battling gay demons so it's a very long and drawn-out drama. it's traumatising not in the way it was a bad relationship necessarily but in that sitting-in-the-shower-listening-to-indie-sad-girl-music-for-six-months-wondering-why-it-didn't-work-out way

honourable mentions: sirius x alastor, sirius x evan, and sirius x pandora

[hergan416]

Look, this is tough for round one because both are amazing moments and both are so gay. So so so gay.

This fight should be happening later or something. but it's happening now and i'm not standing for the juiciest sherliam angst in the series, juicier than any "oh he's as detective i could NEVER" get cut right now. They flirted. They assumed it wouldn't work. They fell off a bridge together and held each other close as they were falling - and only one of them woke up.

And his vigil is as declarative as jumping off that bridge in the first place. knowing that he went there day after day after day, working and then coming home to a hospital bed to sit vigil to see if Liam could get himself to wake up from his coma. He could have stayed like that forever. I don't think it would have changed anything.

We're so lucky that Liam woke up to get to the wedding vows or the retelling of them or anything else. But that moment? Yeah that's dedication.

[trying-to-get-somewhere-real]

really feel like fandom needs to get more comfortable with ambiguous dynamics, and how that ambiguity can be a feature not a bug! i notice this everywhere in fandom now, but this post is about sydcarmy the bear cause that is my current hyperfixation lol. sitting with ambiguity is the lifeblood of so many (all?) queer ships (also, importantly, my real-life queer experience) but i think it’s often relevant for straight ships too. no one is making sydcarmy antis ship them but to say ABSOLUTELY NOT because the nature of their relationship at this very moment is not easily defined is missing so much that is rich and interesting and sexy about figuring out what the dynamic is. *especially* for fan content (which is what a lot of us are here for actually!) using fic and meta to explore what certain words, body language, editing choices, music choices, etc mean is what makes our brains light up! (mine at least)

tension between two characters is the sexiest thing and ambiguity heightens that tension imo! whatever happens or does not happen with them in the future, at this very moment in time the undefinable quality of their relationship creates the space for shipping. this used to be a rather basic concept in fandom that seems to have gotten lost in the past however many years. i guess the primary anti response to this would be that the dynamic is *not* ambiguous—it is platonic—but like, i am with @eatandsleepwell who just included the following in this excellent post today:

and the thing about syd and carm being friends is that. they’re not. or at least not yet. or at least they need more to be friends. friends know your mom is dead, they know what your relationship with your parents is like. friends can easily hang out with each other after work. friends can be apart without the sense that the separation is akin to devastation. 

i don’t really think they’re friends! they are a weird third thing that is so delicious to me, and every single day right now very brilliant people are writing hundreds of words on this website attempting to interpret what that thing is or could be. this is the lifeblood of fandom! and the demand or expectation that ships have neon signs above them that say ROMANTIC to be valid romantic ships is just very odd to me. syd and carmy are weird and intense about each other in a way that is not easy to parse but once you decide to try and parse it, it’s such a satisfying experience as a fan. they had some major blow ups in s1, and in s2 managed to largely avoid them with the asl sorry but clearly were in unspokenish conflict much of the time (that they managed to diffuse just barely; mostly by syd walking away!) besties is not the word i would use to describe them at all. besties do not struggle this much to communicate. there are so many wonderful complicated bonkers things going on there and the purpose of this post isn’t to get into them but just to point out that they’re there.

anyone who thinks it’s easy to reduce them to any one given thing right now isn’t paying enough attention. and not being able to categorize them easily isn’t a bad thing for me. it’s the constant thrum of what is this? what is this? what is this??? that makes fandom great and i wish that didn’t feel like a hot take right now.

[im-still-watching-anime]

sasuke: i’m still glad we made up and all but….

naruto: …..but?

sasuke: us killing each other would have been SO romantic

naruto: i was JUST thinking about that—

[fisheito]

If is not to much of an issue can you give a doodle of yakurei

I am going through a serious yakurei withdrawals. I need my boys making out so bad (or literally them being right next to each other, I just need them)

The struggles of falling in love with a rare ship

U parade into MY den... and ASK me to DO THINGS??????????? ?????????????????????????????? ????????!?!?!?!!!!!!?!!??! ??? !!???? ???????????????????????????????????????

sure why not