#the cardboard stegosaurus

[svnnyd4ys]

SFTH character tweets!!

[boogflake]

I think "The cardboard stegosaurus" was made for me, the stegosaurus has ALWAYS been my special interest (i have proof) and i'm a frenchie 🤔🤔

[practicedvmm13fullofpotatoes]

From the results of this poll, I bestow upon you all.. Three playlists!! Why? Because I suddenly got motivation to do them since those 7 days

In first place, The Lefternmost Window, a playlist about Sally!!

In second place, The Cardboard Stegosaurus, a playlist about Marie-Claire!! Playlist image from The Clovers and Crows :)

In third place, No! I Always Loved That Caravan!, a playlist about the O'Hands!!

[moulinruno]

Oh, I've been low, but damn it I bet it don't show It was heaven a moment ago I had it, almost We had it, almost

[je-lurk]

It’s time for another sfth fact check! This time concerning the Cardboard Stegosaurus.

Pierre has blocked the Eurotunnel with two blocks of granite.

Some facts about granite:

Granite has a hardness from 6 to 8 on the Mohs scale (depending on the source). It’s very resistant but far from unbreakable (diamond is at 10 on the scale).

Granite’s density apparently varies between 2,63 and 2,75. For the calculations we’ll use 2,7 meaning granite weighs 2700 kilograms by cubic meter.

Some facts about the Eurotunnel:

The Eurotunnel is 50 km long, with a 38 km section under the sea. For those who don’t know this is a train tunnel. It’s actually two tunnels, each with one train track.

The tunnels have a 7,6m diameter, so a 180 m^2 section (rounded down to account for the sidewalk, track and catenary, but still an overshot imo).

The tunnels are connected in two places to allow train redirection (if necessary).

To block all trains, Pierre would have likely chosen this spot, nearest to France:

Assuming this intersection is at one fourth of way underwater, this would place it ¼*37+3,7(the French underground section) = 12,95 km from the French side. The actual distance doesn’t matter that much in regard to literally everything else but it’s nice to get an order of magnitude.

The varying width of the tunnel on the graph (specifically at the intersections) could let us think there are two tracks (and two catenaries) in here. So do we double the section?

I haven’t found easily accessible information on it so let’s say yes.

Now, what thickness do we think the slabs are? I originally wanted to say 50 cm but let’s be gracious and say they’re 20 cm thick.

Each slab would be composed of 72 m^3 of granite and weigh nearly 200 tonnes (194,4), or 200000 kilograms each (about apparently 33 stegosauruses).

There are still a lot of logistical questions I do not want to think about, such as how can this man move 200t with each arm over 12 kms (probably more, we don’t know where he got them from), without damaging the tunnels (catenaries, sidewalks and all the other stuff) (I mean maybe sideways? But how to put them properly afterwards, and have it all be airtight at that?), without being stopped before entering the tunnel or apparently being noticed by, let’s say an eighth (half of a fourth) of the 36000 sensors inside the tunnels, so 4500 sensors.

They mentioned air would be running out. Somehow, I don’t think there wouldn’t be a service tunnel exit at an intersection? Imagine they’re all being like "oh no I’m dying :(" and a door opens and someone goes "what is going on in here?"

And Cliff and Chip? They, what, ran almost 40 km with drills in hand? In the service tunnel in the best case scenario? Why weren’t they picked up by the sensors?

What the fuck is this bullshit security?

[i-may-be-an-emu]

Sam was trying so hard 😭

[weirdagnes]

Epilogue idea for the Cardboard Stegosaurus: after Cliff and Marie Claire’s co-worker (I think AJ named him Pierre?) re-opened the tunnels and united the English and French geologist teams once again, the two find themselves bonding.

So they became friends, often visiting Marie Claire’s grave together, and reminiscing good memories of her. Pierre finds that Cliff isn’t so bad after all, it was his grief and jealousy that prevented him from seeing Cliff in a positive light.

Pierre also warms up to Cliff’s son, Chip, he finds himself spending time with the boy whenever he visits. The boy had his mother’s eyes, and though it brings up painful memories, Pierre felt protective and soft for Chip as he is still Marie Claire’s son after all.

Chip likes making cardboard cutouts of dinosaurs, his favorite the Stegosaurus. Pierre would let the boy infodump about dinosaurs, and would tell him cool rock facts in return. Cliff would return from the kitchen with their merienda, his heart warming at the sight of the two.

The sight felt familiar to Cliff, reminded him of his wife when she would play with her son. Wait - what did that mean?

Pierre slowly comes to a realization that he has found warmth and home whenever he was with Cliff and his son. Wait had he.. fallen for him? His long rival, the lover of his former love?

But wouldn’t falling for one another betray their love for Marie Claire? Cliff, does he even deserve Pierre when he failed saving Marie Claire from her own dark thoughts? And Pierre, does he even deserve Cliff after he’s attempted to destroy the Euro tunnel, where their love first blossomed?

The two navigates these new feelings, they grew and healed together. Their relationship transforms from a classic enemies to friends to lovers. The two confessed their love one night and laughed at the odd turn of events. There was life after Marie Claire, and it is promising.

Pierre financially helps the Cliff and his son, even offering them to stay at his home if Cliff could no longer afford to sustain the family. Pierre would also teach Chip some French, which to their shock, helped him manage his English/French seizures (yes that is integral to the plot).

They married, Chip has 2 dads now, and they lived happily ever after👨‍👨‍👦

[youling-the-ghost]

As someone who hasn't watched The Cardboard Stegosauraus, some of these are equally hilarious as they are confusing.

To whoever is making the sfth subtitles: I love you and I wish you everything good in life <3

[svnnyd4ys]

sfth as more headlines x

love making these iwl to you guys

[youling-the-ghost]

ayyyy we're matching!

found the only sfth quiz on uquiz:

and honestly yeah life is shit

my fave WEBB subtitle just to lighten the mood

[sixthsensewulf]

Surprise... I've been enjoying Shoot from the Hip for a few months at this point now. .

I am honestly fully caught up on the long forms (patrons as well as public release). Not really caught up on the patrons live show streams yet, but have seen all this year's Edinburgh Fringe shows.

So here is a list of SFTH long forms that I didn't expect from the title to go in the direction i thought it would..... Which in hindsight could be all of them, since all four of the boys are chaotic entities.

- Bus! = Yep. . . In all honesty whatever you thought they would do with the word bus. .throw it away. .also oddly not going to lie. .it is a comfort play for me. .I love a good villain Tom character.

- The Cardboard Stegosaurus = I wanted wholesome children characters. . But no. .let's add onto the pile of STFH's kids that have heartbreaking backgrounds and trauma. .

- The Oopsie Daisy Bulge = in all honesty I have no idea what I was thinking this was going to be..

**** Patron****

- Tango at the Rugby Club = I do want them to do a part two this one. .but at the same time, the cliffhanger was incredible. You could tell having Tom around, especially with this one, helps the rest stay on the path of the plot. . .

- Drama at Till 4 = To be fair.. I did want them to be a supermarket all play. . This one is sweet.

- Keith: The Delivery Guy = oddly. . I did want this to be a followup to The Milkman. .but a WWII drama worked very well.

- I killed the Mockingbird = I mean this whole show was chaotic, but that's the fringe for you. But hey. . We have 2 more kids in the traumatized STFH kids collection.

[practicedvmm13fullofpotatoes]

I've lowkey lost ideas so

And then from there I'll just pick a character/relationship I like

[generalidiocy]

My Top Ten Favourite SFTH Plays (vaguely ranked, but it changes a lot). Also, idk how to put things under a cut intentionally so you folks might have to sit through this, sorry about that /gen, the autism has overtaken me tonight /hj

10. The Midnight Mystery

I mean, Scottish Batman is too iconic to not be included on this list

9. OMG, Is This A Joke?

This one is iconic, I've gone off it slightly recently but that's probably because I've watched it too many times lol

8. Lost In Your Eyes

Plot centered around romance that I don't dislike? That's a win. Love the adventure here too, and no deaths either! (/s)

7. Priscilla's Final Petal

SFTH is really good at horror, I wish they did it more often. Yet another traumatized child to add to the collection

6. The Cardboard Stegosaurus

I mean, this one is a difficult watch but it's so beautifully done. BBC News is my favourite character

5. Wine Under The Bridge

This is where it gets tricky now. The top five order changes a lot... Troll Son is adorable and the whole play is hilarious 🐐🐐

4. The Unrelenting Aubergine

I laughed so much watching this one when it aired. Beautiful love story, iconic characters and comedy, overall wonderful

3. The Mystery Of The Midnight Circus

Senile Sherlock Holmes is a fantastic concept, and the whole thing is bloody hilarious! Easy to understand as well, given that I know very little of ACD Holmes

2. The Excited Chinchilla

Sci-fi is my favourite genre, and this was such a good example of it! Idk what my favourite part is, but the chinchilla puppeteering Roy/Gary is engrained in my brain

1. Inside the Mysterious Cube

I mean, I know it's a popular one but that's cause it's good! I love sci-fi so this was perfect, bubbamiah is beautifully heartbreaking, and I love the cube characters too!

Well done if you made it to the end, sorry for the ramble, just needed somewhere to put my autism /hj

[je-lurk]

After reading one too many fic with Google Translate French, I hereby offer my translation services to literally any fic writer that sees this post.

Please, I am begging you to take me up on my offer, I can’t take this anymore

[i-may-be-an-emu]

SFTH Fic Masterlist

#16. The Cardboard Stegosaurus

Full masterlist here

[goingroundincircles-ontrack]

Finally, I'm back with part 6 of my sfth of my reviews of sfth's improvised plays after a break of like 3?? weeks

Beetroots and Murder 9/10

OHHHH SOMERSET this is a really good play. The plot is enough to rival any published story. Sam's character has so much depth, the guilt, the trying to make things a bit better only to fail anyways. And then Andre Beetroot. I think everyone loves Andre Beetroot (especially now we have a backstory for him) and so it's near the top of my list of favourite plays

Caeser and Juliet 8/10

highly historically inaccurate but it doesn't matter. I love a dictator who's down bad for his significant other. That bit where Caesar is talking to his assistant and the assistant goes "she bathed in their blood" and caesar replies with "and her skin is glowing" has been playing on repeat in my brain. I also think the lines about power are really good and I keep thinking of when Caesar proposes to Juliet how big Tom's ring is on AJ's finger. Also AJ's singing is glorious

The Cardboard Stegosaurus 9/10

I find it so funny that the whole play is based on the idea that two people made the eurotunnel with handheld power tools. The bit about Cliff's wife falling off the cliff (the "Whee! That looks like a trilabite! "bit) is so funny even tho it's pretty dark. I guess that's the sfth magic of making dark things funny.

Anyways that's part 6 done (I'm halfway through reviewing all their plays!!) lmk what you think and I will eventually return with part 7

Parts 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5