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#the amount of travelers journals
cozones-hellhole · 2 years
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Nobody tell Lemm about this
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darkcreamz95 · 1 month
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When you are finally alone during a company trip...
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blujayonthewing · 1 year
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got some watercolors
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angelicgirlmj · 1 month
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cultivating your hobbies to become that girl
as summer starts to end, i find my days a little emptier and im full of anticipation for the coming academic year. but the last thing i want to do is waste the last part of summer so now is the perfect time to cultivate or begin a new hobby, focusing on four areas to level up your body, skills, mind and passions! enjoy angels and i hope this gives you some inspiration.
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body
having a hobby that helps you reach your dream body, maintain a healthy lifestyle or just help with your mental health (as moving your body always does!) is such a good idea. the past few months my workout schedule has decreased due to the amount of schoolwork i have had and exam season so now is the perfect time for me to get more disciplined and build up a good workout scheme. my hobbies based around my body are pilates or yoga, both of which help me with my fitness goals. here are some more ideas/inspiration for some hobbies you could start:
‘hot girl walks’ - set a goal for your daily steps and go on walks everyday to help you achieve that.
running daily.
swimming daily.
tennis or badminton daily.
joining a sports club such as football or gymnastics.
dance - could be by yourself at home following dance workouts!
strength training.
starting a fitness challenge - such as a month long youtube challenge.
start making your own fitness content! film videos or write tutorials.
bike riding daily.
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skills
finding a hobby that helps you develop/cultivate your skills is so important. mine personally is cooking/baking as it helps me focus on giving my body what it needs, becoming more independent and providing for those i love. here are some ideas/inspiration:
painting.
making your own clothes - sewing, knitting or crocheting.
gardening.
scrapbooking.
photography.
drawing.
writing - poetry, novels, articles or anything similar.
acting - helps with public speaking, confidence and making friends.
jewellery making.
chess or a similar intense mental game - cultivates your thinking skills and mind.
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mind
finding a hobby that helps you mentally, especially if relevant to schoolwork or career plans is so helpful. mine is reading/engaging with literature as not only does it align with my academic work but also helps me with how i think, view the world and allows me to be more empathetic.
mindfulness/meditation.
learning to play an instrument.
writing/researching around your subjects.
budgeting - good way of keeping track of and understanding money even if you aren’t planning on doing anything economics based!
journalling or keeping a diary.
joining/starting a book club.
starting a studyblr, study youtube channel etc.
learning a new language.
tutoring someone - great way of helping yourself learn as well!
joining a debate team.
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passions
finding a hobby around one of your passions is such a fun and unique way of engaging in things you enjoy. mine personally is visiting museums/areas of historical importance as i am so passionate about history.
visiting art galleries.
attending the theatre/cinema.
going to live music events.
visiting libraries/book shops - growing your wish list, finding new book inspo etc!
going to cooking classes, restaurants or cafes.
travelling to new areas (could be local or international) - perhaps to develop language skills, find places to hike etc.
attending lectures on subjects youre interested in.
watching documentaries or video essays.
starting a new course - i do several history courses, my most recent was on European empires!
making a blog, channel, instagram etc for a new hobby or interest.
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────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ─────── thank you for reading angels! hopefully this will help us all on our hobby journeys and have given you ideas of hobbies to try or develop for the end of summer or just in general! love, m.
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cupidlovesastro · 11 months
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𝓿𝓮𝓷𝓾𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓼𝓮𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝔀𝓱𝔂 𝓹𝓮𝓸𝓹𝓵𝓮 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓳𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾
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venus in 1st- the way you look , your aura, your energy, your presence, the impressions you give on others, the attitude you have about things, how put together you come off, your beauty, your charismatic spirit, your aesthetic, your clothes, your make up, your forehead, your hair or hairstyles, your masculine features/energy
venus in 2nd- your financial situation, your ranking in your work place, if you come off/dress rich, the things you own, house decorations, your room’s aesthetic, your work ethic, your career, if you own expensive things, your neck area, collar bone, your voice, your lips, jaw, your beauty
venus in 3rd- your way with words, how flirting/ talking is easy for you, the way you speak, the way your brain works, your social group, your siblings, your creative writing, your journal/ notes, the elementary school you went to, your neighborhood, your thought process, your shoulders, collarbone, hands, how youthful you look/act
venus in 4th- how you regulate or cope with your emotions, your family or the family you’ve created, your household, your furniture, your decorations, your family roots, your background, the way you mother people or your children, your motherly energy, your femininity, the way you express your femininity, your self care routine, your self care products, how you grew up, how your family treats you, your chest, your boobs, your rib cage, your round face shape, the softness in your features
venus in 5th- your relationship, your lover, your youth, your inner child or the fact you can express it, your children, your features that your children have/will inherit, your aesthetic, the way you express yourself, your art style, the art you make, your spirit, how easy it is for you to get along with people,how easy it is for you to attract people, how many kids you have, the people you’ve hooked up with, the way you express your happiness, your stomach, bellybutton, your confidence, thick hair
venus in 6th- your work out routine, your work out equipment, work out clothes, your health, your pets, work ethic, your organization or organized nature, your resourcefulness, the way that people need you, the service(s) you offer, the way you analyze things, your waist, hips, your youthful appearance,
venus in 7th- your relationship(s), your marriage, how fair you are or act, the way you go about justice, how giving you are, the contracts you have with businesses, your skin, your lower back, your symmetrical features, hair, your feminine features/ energy, your beauty, your aesthetic, the effort you put into your look, your music taste
venus in 8th- your sensual side, your sex appeal, your financial situation, the money or things you’ve inherited from your family, things that you own, your properties/house(s), your mysterious energy or aesthetic, the way your partner spoils you or the way you spoil your partner, sexual organs, your groin, the way people seem to lust over you
venus in 9th - your community, your religion, your culture, your traditions, the places you’ve traveled to, how often you traveled, your intelligence, the degrees you’ve earned, the college you attend to or used to attend, the philosophies you have, the beliefs you share or follow, the way you learn, how learning is fast or easy, your thighs, your waist, your height
venus in 10th- your career, the goals you’ve achieved, your popularity, your influence, your fame, your reputation, your status, your father or father figures in your life, the way you father your children, your masculinity, your masculine features/vibes, your bone structure, teeth
venus in 11th- your social group/ friends, the way you care about the world or a certain community, the amount of social awareness you have, the technology you own like iphone/ ipad/ laptops, etc, the way you dream big, your individuality, your uniqueness the people you surround yourself with, your calves, your ankles, your unique features
venus in 12th- your healing journey, the way you heal from things, your spiritual journey, your spiritual knowledge, spiritual experiences, you connection with spirituality, your connection with your after life, your connection with your subconscious mind, your manifestations, your feet, toes, feminine features, your empathy, your compassion, your emotional intelligence, your intuition
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illyrianbitch · 4 months
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Memories
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Pairing: Reader x Azriel
Summary: While packing some boxes, Azriel is overwhelmed by memories of your relationship.
Warnings: slight angst if you squint, established relationship, fluff fluff fluff :)
Word Count: 2.1k
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 
The apartment was a mess of half-packed boxes and disheveled belongings.
The scent of change hung in the air, thick and heavy— and Azriel was choking on it.  He stood in the middle of the chaos, a forlorn expression etched onto his usually composed face. The bedroom was empty now, save for a few scattered objects and packed cardboard boxes, ready to be taped and taken away. 
Azriel wasn’t sure what to do with himself. He had expected a certain amount of sadness with the move, a certain feeling of leaving something that had once meant the world to him. Even still, he was struggling with the swelling in his heart. He felt his wings behind him now, heavy and tense, as he looked around the room, gaze landing on his various packed boxes. 
He could hear chatter downstairs, could hear Cassian’s laughter and Mor’s grumbling. Azriel’s shadows were downstairs now, too, as they had stayed for the past two weeks of moving out. There was one lone shadow that bounced between the floors, updating Az on every movement and conversation— Cassian had accidentally taped Mor’s hair while attempting to fix up the final living room boxes. Mor had accidentally hit Cassian in the face as a response.
Azriel let out a deep breath, walking towards one of the many opened boxes. His golden-brown eyes shimmered with unshed tears as he gingerly lifted a delicate porcelain teacup. His fingers traced the intricate floral design and a memory washed over him.
It was a rainy afternoon, the kind where the world outside seemed to blur into a grey mist.  Azriel had come to visit, carrying various items that Feyre wanted to drop off but couldn't herself due to her growing belly. It had begun to pour while he was there— in the small apartment he now stood in. You had insisted he stayed, insisted that the weather was too awful for him to make it home. He didn’t have the heart to tell you he’d traveled in worse conditions. And in all honesty, he had found himself unable to leave, anyway. 
You’d invited him into your kitchen, brewed some tea and sat across from him, the table complete with mismatched cups and saucers. Azriel had his wings folded neatly behind him as he sipped the floral tea you brewed, nervous about how large he appeared to you, worried about knocking any one of your small decorations over. The sound of your laughter, bright and unrestrained, had filled the room as you both fell into a natural conversation. He realized that afternoon, in the gloomy grey weather, the awful things he’d do to see you smile again.
And was then he was met with the comforting realization that he didn’t need to do those awful things at all— because you’d asked to see him again once the downpour stopped. 
A sad smile tugged at Azriel’s lips as he carefully wrapped the teacup in tissue paper. Setting it aside, he reached for a worn, leather-bound journal, its pages filled with scribbled, heavy-handed notes. The sight of it tugged at his heart, another memory pulling him under.
You had given him the journal during one of the quieter nights at the townhouse, your fingers brushing his as you handed it over. “For your thoughts,” you had whispered, your eyes sparkling with encouragement.
Azriel had never been a journal lover before, had never been one to write down his feelings, his thoughts, or observations. His job was to observe, yes, but he never thought about it farther than that, had never thought about what he could do with those things he realized, where he could put the multitudes of thoughts that often clouded his mind. 
You had been the first one to ever suggest it— suggest it in a way that was sincere and genuine. You told him that it would be worth it, and when he had made a comment about no one wanting to read what he had to say, you had simply said, “I do. I always want to know what you’re thinking. But that doesn’t matter. No one but you matters.”
So Azriel had taken to it immediately, filling its pages with thoughts, concerns, and observations of various moments— he grew to adore it over time. It helped him with his impulsivity, with his anger, with his loneliness. Even his shadows had grown to love the hobby, had learned to sleep as he wrote away, had learned to delicately ghost the words on the pages as Azriel scratched away his thoughts. 
Azriel’s heart clenched as he placed the journal down and a wave of emotion ran through him like a heavy tide. Tears pricked at his eyes and he swallowed, moving on to the next item—a small, crystal vial filled with shimmering stardust. 
It was the first Starfall since he’d fallen for you, and the night sky had been alive with dancing glittering souls. You managed to catch a handful of stardust, bottling it as a keepsake of the perfect evening. Azriel still remembered how beautiful you looked, how nervous he had been to talk to you that he ended up making some joke about you bottling up a dead spirit for eternity. You only laughed, a sound that he wished he could’ve bottled up in a vial, saved for later like you had done with that stardust. You stared at the glass vial, admired the shimmering glow for a few moments as Azriel had admired you. Then you had given it to him with a whisper: "For you. Even in the darkest times, there's always light." 
He didn’t know how to tell you the gift wasn’t needed, didn’t know how to tell you that you were enough light for him. He’d taken it with shaky fingers— which he prayed to The Mother you hadn’t noticed— and kept the vial in his leathers on every rough mission. It became his talisman, a beacon of hope and love. A connection to you. 
A lump grew in the back of Azriel’s throat.
“I got the tape!”  
Your voice echoed throughout the hall as you rounded the corner, a delicate smile on your face.
The smile quickly fell at the sight of your mate and you stilled, his shadows swirling around you before descending to the ground, quickly dancing over to his form. The room smelled of a bittersweet sadness, of something longing, heavy, and sad. 
"Az, what's going on?” You asked softly, placing the tape on top of the open box before him. “Why are you crying?"
Azriel blinked rapidly, shaking his head softly before turning to look down at you. "I'm not crying," he said. He offered you a smile that didn’t reach his eyes— the same eyes that seemed deep in thought, seemed contemplative and conflicted.
“Azriel.” You gave him a knowing look and gently placed your hands on his face, wiping away a stray tear with your thumb. "What's wrong?" 
He leaned into your touch, eyes fluttering shut for a moment. And then he took your hands in his, bringing them to his lips to kiss your knuckles. His lips were soft against your skin, his kiss feather-light and almost sacred. A warmth inside you blossomed at the softness of his touch, and you let out an appreciative, loving hum.
Azriel brushed the pad of his thumb along your fingers. His gaze fell to your left hand, to the golden ring that adorned your ring finger. A smile grew on his face. He traced it with his thumb, running over the cool metal, inspecting the intricate patterns he had the jeweler carve into the ring— something special just for you. Something as unique as the unbreakable bond you shared.
"It's just strange," Azriel said quietly. He lowered your hands. "I never thought I'd be here. I never imagined ending up so happy.”
You tilted your head at him, feeling your lips fall into a small pout. Azriel only looked at you with a sense of adoration painted through his features. He let out a small breath before he continued, taking a moment to scan the empty room once more.  “I'm sad to leave this apartment because it has so many memories.”
"Oh Az," you said softly, your voice almost a comforting coo.  "I'm sad too. We made some great memories here."
Azriel nodded, his gaze growing distant as he recalled the life he had built here, the life he had fought for with you. He thought of the many times he’d walked you home, when this apartment had just been yours— slightly too big for just one person, slightly too empty that even you felt like it was missing something. He thought about the first time he spent the night, how his shadows fell into place, how they strangely adored the corners of your home, the wood-paneled hallways and plaster banisters. He thought about the day he moved in, how he woke up in the middle of the night afraid that it had all been a dream, only to be lulled back to sleep by your soft whispers, gentle touch, and a whole lot of sweet, sleepy sex. 
He let out a small, content laugh. "We did."
You tugged on his hand, pulling his focus back to you. When his eyes met yours, his gaze softened, and you felt a glow in your chest. You gave that divine thread between you a small tug, felt it sing deep within your ribs. A rush of life flowed through you, something bright and hopeful. The air around you changed, less bittersweet now, less heavy. You smiled gently. 
"Now we'll make even more memories in a place that’s big enough for all of us."
It was then that you pulled his hand towards you, taking his large palm and placing it on your stomach. His fingers splayed over the growing bump you now adorned. From underneath your hold, you felt a release of tension in Azriel’s hands. 
Tendrils of shadow hovered over his touch, gently dancing across your stomach as Azriel admired the sight before him. His voice was tender as he whispered, "How did I ever get so lucky?”
He blinked, tears welling up in his eyes again. He flickered his gaze back to your face, meeting your eyes instantly. They mirrored his own, welled up with tears that brimmed on your waterlines. You laughed softly. 
The sound rippled through Azriel’s body and he felt himself melt even further into you. Even his shadows simply sat atop your belly now, almost unmoving, as if they too were admiring you— admiring all that you were. They had taken a specific liking to you since you’d gotten pregnant, never leaving your side unless it was absolutely necessary— Azriel was grateful for it, grateful that there was always one lone tendril that would keep him company, too, that would update him on you whenever he wasn’t in the room. 
“You know, I'm the pregnant one with all these hormones, not you," you teased.
Azriel chuckled, eyes shining with love. The muscles of his cheeks ached with the deepness of his smile.  "Forgive me if I get a bit emotional thinking about the love of my life and our future child."
You felt your knees almost buckle, felt something flutter in your stomach at his words. The love of his life and his future child. You and your future child. 
"My sweet, sappy mate."
He laughed again, the sound rich and full of life. He pulled you into a gentle embrace. "I love you," he said, his voice now carrying a sincerity that made you breathless, a tone that spoke of a vow and a promise. His eyes scanned your face, taking in every feature. 
Oh how you hoped your child got his eyes, got the beautiful hazel they contained, the flicker of brown, dots of green. You hoped your child got his laugh too, the deep rumble that made you feel love in every way possible. You blinked away a few growing tears. 
"And I love you," you replied, your heart swelling with joy. You stepped back, giving him a gentle nudge. "Okay, now get to packing because my feet hurt and I'm really craving some ice cream."
Azriel grinned, shaking his head as he watched you walk away. His shadows trailed after you, except for one that lingered behind, wrapping around his hand as he reached for the packing tape.
He looked down at the shadow, a smile tugging at his lips as its gentle, calm movement. "Alright,” he murmured, “Let's finish this up and get our girl some ice cream.”
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
permanent tag list 🫶🏻: @rhysandorian @itsswritten @milswrites @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon
@glam-targaryen @cheneyq @darkbloodsly @pit-and-the-pen
azriel tag list: @thisiskaylin @serrendiipty
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dewffin · 3 months
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soo... I think I accidentally began to make a Silmarillion Fangame...
For some unknown reason i was like "I wanna make textures :D" but i didn't want to model shit, so i just used VROID studio as a painting book... but then i was like "ummm, i never tried to draw a character an then tried to make it 3D in vroid" so uh-
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yeah...
and then i was like "let´s drop this bad boy in Unreal to see how he looks" and because, well, i don't know why i decided to try to make him look a bit 2D? like he was drawn? like doing the complete opposite of what i just did?
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so this is what he looked when i began to play with post process stuff
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and because i wanted to look around and stuff i added a little guy i had, and it turns out that he was really little and i had to make him a box to take pics of Fëanor's face
Then i did more stuff and i ended up with these cute flowers :D
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And then I said fuck it, i think I'm making a game...
So the thing is that doing a game doing a game while being a one person studio is a biiiiiit difficult.
By that i mean i had to try to keep my head leveled in what i could do, so I ended up with this...
Tecilwë's Adventures in Arda
(yeah, i don't have a name for this)
So, you play as Tecilwë, a noldorin journalist that travels around trying to document the best stories of Arda. You can find out what is happening around by talking with people, sneaking around or finding clues. Then, you can write your take on what happens, and depending on what you say, how you say it and what secrets do you keep your reputation as a journalist and your relationship with the different character you find can change for better or worse.
A little bit about Tecilwë...
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Q Tecilwë Autanna -  S Tegilu
Tecilwë - The one who writes [tecil “pen”, wë “person”] or as i like to call them "El pibe birome"
Autanna - the lost sign, the fool sign [au “away, lost”, aut “fool”, tanna “sign, token”]
A young lore master from Tirion. Studied under Rumil, and is excited to document all that happens in the course of the story. 
Curious and eager to learn. More often than not ends up in trouble for documenting what was not supposed to be seen.
Tecilwë believes in the power of the word, and on how truth is composed by those who write it.
Not often remembered, wants to be remembered as one of the great lore masters. But the curse of the Noldor runs deep…
Basically a player insert
Y alto chismoso
What i have for now in gameplay is that you can run around a location (and you'll be able to travel to different places, but time passes so, for example, if you leave Aman you cannot go back, or if Gondolin fell then you cant go there). There as i wrote you can talk to people and find out stuff, and all what you find you write in your journal, which you can check to remember what you have seen. With all of that you can unlock new dialogues, and when you get enough information you can end the day and write like a newspaper or magazine. If, for example, you found that gasp Maedhros and Fingon are being two love birds behind a tree, you can write about that in different ways. A- You just say thing as they are. B- You say that is great to see the unity in the House of Finwë. C- Accuse Fingon of corrupting the innocent eldest of Fëanor. D- say nothing about this. With A you get lower relationship points with Russingon for exposing them. B gets you a good realtionship with them, but lower with Fëanor. C gets you a good amount of points with Fëanor, but the other two will hate your guts. And with D, nothing changes, but you can confront them about their relationship and tell them to be more careful if they want to keep it a secret.
Also if you write a lot about gossip stuff you will lose credibility and that is kinda a way to not being remember as the great Lore Master you want to be...
Also i love how FIngon's hair is coming out. This is like a first draft but it was fun to make.
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Also this motherfucker is so fucking tall
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And this is one of my favourite screenshots from when i had Fëanor as the playable character
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(also here is really noticeable that i added lights to their eyes, and it switches form golden to silver light)
In short, a gossip simulator
Also i cannot wait to make the "Who is Gil-Galad's dad" level
Version 0.1.0
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bbyblair · 1 year
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small touches, pink cheeks. 
charles leclerc x f!reader 
pt.2!
 *ੈ✩‧₊˚
a/n: this is the first fic i’ve ever written so please excuse any mistakes or errors in my writing! Any tips are welcomed and very appreciated. hope you guys enjoy this! let me know if anyone would like a part two. <3
summary: the start of the 2023 season, Bahrain in early march. you'd recently joined the sky team, working as a news reporter and interviewer for your beloved sport.it's your first week and a mix of nerves and anticipation swirl together in your stomach. you're giddy to finally meet who you’d be working with for the next few months… but what happens when an instant connection sparks up between the new girl and Ferrari's golden boy? 
warnings: light cursing, kind of angst? idk. sort of enemies to lovers? reader is annoyed at Charles :(
word count: 1.8k
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thursday, march 2nd 2023. 
a small breeze creeps through your window and goosebumps arise on your skin. you can hear your alarm angrily blaring on your phone, but you hadn't woken up yet fully and your brain was still in a haze. suddenly your eyes snap open as you realise what day it is. it's race week and you should be heading off to the airport in around three hours, shit. 
you sigh the same dramatic sigh you had been doing since you were a little girl and roll your eyes. contemplating whether or not to risk another five minutes of blissful sleep. luckily you come to your senses before making that grave mistake. your feet pad lightly across your bedroom floor and into the bathroom, you pause and look around your room realising that from now on you're going to be on the move for a solid 6 months. it's worth it though, this career you had been working toward since you were in high school, and you're proud of yourself to have finally got here. 
the cool shower water finished off the job of waking you up and after spending a little too much time getting ready you were packed and heading off to the airport. 
┊┊┊┊ ➶ ❁۪ 。˚ ✧
the flight went quickly, considering the ample amounts of work you had to complete before landing, but you managed to get it all done on the plane with a little bit of rushing. you hadn't had time to travel much during your childhood or during college so you were practically squealing with excitement when you emerged from the plane and began your journey to the hotel you were staying in. 
the taxi was stuffy and warm, and your excitement started to be replaced with nerves as you realised that soon you would be in the heat of the paddock, meeting with very important people and drivers. 
you always had a natural ability to make people feel comfortable and this helped you in becoming an interviewer, plus the three years of journalism school you just about survived. It had been a wild ride, but you were finally here, in bahrain, about to be introduced to your new life. 
after getting yourself set up in your hotel and ready for the rest of the afternoon you began making your way over to the race venue. it was huge, but empty due to the fact that the race was in a few days. The only people around were a few race engineers and team members who were discussing strategy for the upcoming race. you were looking for someone in particular, your boss who you'd met before in london. stumbling through the paddock you finally found where the sky hq was situated and after making quick friends with the rest of your interviewing team, some of whom you knew from back home, you all decided to go out for some drinks. 
the night moved fast and before you knew it you were making your way back to the hotel at an unreasonably late time and collapsed onto the bed, tiredness taking over your whole body. 
friday , march 3rd 2023. 
regret washed over your body as you woke up in your hotel room, your alarm blaring at you at a completely unreasonable time. you swiftly began getting ready for the day ahead, your first day. nerves overtake your body again completely during your short walk to the circuit, it was already swarming with fans, ready to watch the free practice after missing their sport for a few months. the staff entrance was hidden away and luckily not too busy, so you managed to sneak in on time. 
you greeted your team who you'd already become quick friends with yesterday and they began briefing you on the timing of the day and when you would be interviewing the drivers. you had been told that this morning you were meant to go over to the ferraris section of the paddock and conduct a fun interview with leclerc and sainz. some silly questionnaire to test their knowledge of one another by asking them some, in your opinion, very personal questions. of course you smiled heartily and agreed, after all this was your job and you were excited to meet all of the drivers, having loved f1 since you were little. 
you made your way over to the ferrari area, and you and the filming crew were kindly greeted by their pr team who directed into a room and informed you that the two drivers would be there shortly. nerves started to bubble up in your stomach, even though you were confident and knew that you were good at your job sometimes meeting new people stressed you out a little more than you liked to admit. 
shuffling and muffled voices were heard outside of the door and the suddenly it opened and you were greeted with two handsome faces, both smiling politely at you and they outstretched their hands for you to take. you quickly grabbed the spaniards hand and shook it. 
“mr sainz, its a pleasure to meet you, im y/n im going to be hosting your interview today.”
his smile grew a little wider and he chuckled, “please call me carlos, and its lovely to meet you too y/n.” you blushed a little at how he said your name in his accent and smiled at him. your eyes then landed on the monegasque next to you, his smile remained on his face but his eyes were unreadable and intimated you a little bit. his eyes raked over your form and then he also outstretched his hand. his grip was much firmer than carlos’ and he began speaking before you. 
“charles, I'm looking forward to working with you y/n.” his eyes then returned to their initial softness and his grip loosed. you were a little taken aback but quickly composed yourself. you just simply nodded your head in response and softly spoke out a small “me too.”
that interaction stumped you, and you were clearly flustered but the rest of the interview went smoothly and you had played the quiz game, the two men laughing throughout and their childish rivalry entertained you more than you liked to admit. but throughout the interview you had felt charles' eyes on you more than once. once you dared to meet his gaze, but as soon as you did he quickly looked ack at his teammate and continued with the game nonchalantly. 
maybe you were just making this up, you didn't know. but no one had ever looked at you the way charles did and it made an odd feeling rise up in your stomach.after the interview ended the two men shook your hand again and began to leave, having to get ready for free practice which was starting in a few hours.
the filming crew packed up and left. you turned your back and let out a sigh at the odd experience. shuffling through your bag for your phone you heard someone clear their throat behind you and your body snapped back and spun around. to your surprise charles was stood their. the same unreadable expression on his face which made your cheeks burn straight away. you looked around awkwardly, silence engulfed the room and you didn't know if you should say something to the driver or stay silent. his voice broke you out of your thoughts. 
“sorry, i didnt mean to scare you.” he chuckled softly and his eyes creased, easing your nerves a little. the hint of his accent poked through his words, it was very attractive you had to admit. 
“no , no its okay, can i help you with anything?” your voice came out harder than you imagined and more agitated than you felt. his expression hardened again and his smile fell, he shook his head. 
“sorry, i just thought i forgot my phone.”
you stood there and looked about the room. you felt the atmosphere in the room change and as you looked at him more closely you could see the outline of his phone in his jean pocket. he didn't know you had noticed, and you were confused as to why he was really here. not wanting to drag on this interaction longer than needed you quickly picked up your bag and began to walk toward the door. 
“I hope you find it.” you mumbled out. 
suddenly his body was blocking the doorway and you stopped a few feet away from him. your face burning red and confused about his behaviour. “you are not going to help me look?” he smiled and a sneakily glint in his eye made your heart skip a beat. was he flirting with you? you were very up to date with the gossip and knew he had a suspected girlfriend so his behaviour was even more shocking to you. 
“oh sorry.” you mumbled dumbly, not knowing what to say. you knew he had his phone and you weren't about to embarrass yourself by crawling all over the floor looking for it. 
“i've got to edit this interview i'm afraid, so if you wouldn't mind letting me pass.” you looked down at the ground as you spoke and mentally cursed yourself at the fact that your voice came out much weaker than you intended. 
“okay.” you could hear the smile in his voice, “i apologise ma douce.” my sweet. you didn't know what he had just called you but the french nickname paired with his voice made your heart sway and even more blush burned on your cheeks. he moved from the doorway with a charming smile and allowed you to pass through. 
your feet felt like jelly underneath you but somehow you carried yourself through the paddock back to your work area, a smile gracing your pretty features at what had just happened. but you couldn't allow anything to happen and you knew that, he had a girlfriend and it was your job to interview him. this is so wrong you told yourself. sliding a hand over your face to try to compose yourself, you began to start editing the interview. 
you paused in shock, watching over the footage you saw how charles gaze almost never left you throughout the whole interview. he was starting at you like an animal and you didn't know why. shock graced your features even more to see how he clearly was checking you out and when you spoke to carlos, his eyes even darkened in a overprotective manner. who was he to get so possessive over you? you had just met? anger started to replace the feelings of shock and you wanted to storm back into ferrari to give him a piece of your mind… 
┊┊┊┊ ➶ ❁۪ 。˚ ✧
pt2?
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miles-edgewords · 5 days
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short rant about stanford pines because i need to talk about him
(content warning: mentions of abuse/cults/etc.)
ford is not evil, and i will not be convinced otherwise. he definitely struggles with emotional empathy in high-stress situations, but he’s got plenty of cognitive empathy when he’s given time to process. journal 3 made it extremely clear that he felt remorse for his actions, and ultimately he ended up admitting that stanley was the hero in the end. obviously feeling remorse ≠ earning forgiveness, but by the end of the book he’s very clearly taking steps to make amends for his mistakes and doesn’t expect forgiveness in return.
a lot of the shit ford did was also during the time he was being heavily manipulated by bill. again, this doesn’t excuse anything, but you have to remember that bill is so good at manipulation that he was one of the most feared entities in the multiverse for an enormous amount of time. bill used tactics commonly used by abusers and cult leaders to make their victims easier to manipulate (ie. enforcing severe sleep deprivation, waiting until the victim is at their lowest to make a move, isolation, love-bombing, etc.) and even when ford finally discovered the true nature of his “muse” he was effectively still being manipulated. during his 30-year dimension travels he was so worried about being used again that he agreed to have a metal plate surgically installed in his head and was still devoting 100% of his time and energy to bill—he just saw him in a negative light now instead of a positive one. again, bill’s manipulation doesn’t mean ford is exempt from accountability, but it’s worth keeping in mind.
another thing i’d like to mention is ford and stan’s parents. we don’t see that much of them, but between what we see and what’s implied we know that their father was pretty much the pinnacle of toxic masculinity. ford was raised believing that the only way he could be respected, not to mention loved, was by keeping his flaws to himself and strengthening his redeeming qualities. ford loved his research, yes— but it was also the only thing he could let himself focus on. without his assets, he was nothing (or so he believed).
ford is, at heart, someone who desperately wants to be known and loved. it took him a long time to realize that the solution to that was not awards or fame or glory, despite what he’d been led to think. it wasn’t by being the smartest kid in the classroom, or the toughest guy in the interdimensional battlefield. the best way to feel fulfilled, as he would eventually discover, is by being with people who love and trust him, and loving and trusting them in return. and he got there. bit by bit, he got there.
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labyrinthofsphinx · 24 days
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Are we going to get to meet Aunt Edith? She sounds like a delight!
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Aunt Edith is Vox's father's older sister. She's also the black sheep of the family. An archeologist by trade, her studies send her all over the world and back again, though she spends a significant amount of time in South America. She's slowed down a little over the years, and writes a lot of travel journals about the places she been and especially the people she's met. She's a very worldly type. Vox absolutely adores her.
She's also the one who gave Vox a lot of his advice on things, like the sand dollar story. Vox learned a lot about acceptance, both of himself and others, from her.
Anon asked: Did Al meet Aunt Edith? If so what did he think of her??
Anon asked: What's Vox's aunt Edith like? Has she met Al yet? Did they get along?
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Yes, Al has met Aunt Edith. He loves Aunt Edith. She's strong like Vox, but almost half the height. She can drink Al under the table, no problem. She doesn't take crap from anyone. Annnd she's constantly telling her brother that if he doesn't shut his trap, she's going feed him to a swarm of piranhas. Al thinks she's amazing. And insane. Which makes her even better in his book XD.
Aunt Edith adores Alastor. Vox still writes to her as often as he can, and when Al started showing up in his letters, she knew right away what that meant. (She was already well aware of Vox's sexuality by that point ;)) She was dying to meet Al, honestly. He's as good as gold in her book for making Vox so happy.
As a quick aside, Aunt Edith doesn't speak to the rest of the family either. She really only stayed for Vox. When he cut them off, she did too, happily. She also has absolutely no idea about the murders. Also, also, Harry is her platonic husband. He's a nature photographer and amateur entomologist.
Thanks for the asks!
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somedayillbepeterpan · 2 months
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I demand a Polinyear. Or a Polinlifetime.
For Bonus Polinweek Day 7 | Favourite kink + Love confessions S3E8 | Into the Light The Butterfly Ball confession scene
I have not abandoned my Butterfly ball deep dive series. It's just taking a while to write. And I also was enjoying creating content for Polinweek as it's my first time participating. But I will definitely finish that series.
One of my favourite things about Bridgerton S3 is how real/authentic/genuine it was in portraying Colin and Pen's Friends to Lovers journey. I was rewatching tonight and I burst into tears when the wedding scene was on and I was uncontrollably sobbing by the time Episode 8 rolled around.
The very first time that they finally see each other equally, the very first time that they finally are aligned, the very first time that they decided to grow and mature together is the very first time that they said I love you to each other. Throughout the show, it was just one saying it and the other accepting it with no direct reply.
But the one above was them on equal grounds, on equal playing field saying that the love they feel for each other is more than lust, more than shallow emotions, more than codependency but just pure, unadulterated love.
It's that look that they give each other that even without words says, "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Because you are deep inside my soul and I understand what love is because of you."
(Why am I crying while writing this???)
The sensation of falling in love is so intense that sometimes you forget yourself. And when you forget yourself, the sensation of love becomes corrupted. There is something that I always remember my husband said to me while we were in the first throes of our love story-- that it takes two people to fall in love. To add to that, it takes another person to grow out of yourself.
Both Colin and Pen were lonely souls, even with the amount of people around them. Since both of them desired deep connection (Colin's journal and when Pen was talking to Debling about love), they have unintentionally isolated themselves with the people around them (Colin going on his travels and when Pen couldn't answer her mother's question of who she was protecting herself from when she started writing LW). The circumstances that pushed them to their loneliness kept them from positively maturing, rendering them stuck in their pasts.
This is why their love story becomes so beautiful to me. In the process of falling in love with each other (or understanding the deep connection they have), they are offered the chance to grow out of the versions they have been stuck on. And isn't that what love should be and do to you? To help take you out of your blindspots and help make you understand that life isn't made to be lived in isolation.
The scene above perfectly ties up that evolution. By looking into how their I love you's progressed-- from Pen's botched confession on S1E8, to Colin and Pen's reciprocated "you are special to me" declaration, to the fallout and subsequent rebuilding of "friendship" via courting lessons, to realising and accepting that they cannot live without each other on a carriage ride to Colin saying I love you for the first time (but with a little push from his big bros and a dash of his hero complex default), to Pen's "I have always loved you", to Pen's three "I love you's" (but with a dash of angst and desperation to get that actual sentiment in Colin's head) and then to end up here, in the Butterfly ball, them saying I love you to each other for the first time without any other hindrance other that it being the truth.
No expectations but just pure love. Luke and Nic's delivery was yet another slam dunk in this scene and I really do believe it's why most of us cried. Not only that Colin's confession before that was so beautiful but it's this mutual acceptance, mutual seeing, mutual embracing of each other's authentic selves that made this scene so satisfying.
And for my personal indulgence, I really love it when I love you's are said just as it is, with no "too's" or "more's" because love is unquantifiable. I try never to say "I love you, too" at all as it never sounds right to me.
Much like my post about my favourite quote, this again is an example of how such simple lines where elevated by the story and Luke and Nic's performances.
I really can't move on from S3. Consider this as my love confession to the season too.
On a side note: Thank you for the bonus Polinweek. I've yet to be done with this season so I hope you can all continue to ride this wave with me.
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mayakern · 19 days
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hi!! i just wanted to say thank you for making such cute skirts :) i got a jack o lantern skirt and its so wonderful. i'm beyond delighted with it!!!!! I've been experimenting with things that fit in the pockets, both on purpose and on accident, and here are my findings so far;
12 inch shadow the hedgehog plush
24oz bottle of vegetable oil
my phone (this makes sense but it still makes me very happy)
a bag of cat treats and a kind of small cat (the fiend tried to climb into my pocket to steal cat treats. the treats fit, the cat does not.)
all of my dnd stuff (dice, notes journal, pencils, etc)
three decks of tarot cards and several large crystals
one bok choy
several small bags of chips
a spare outfit consisting of leggings and a t shirt
i keep losing my phone in the pockets (please help)
my travel sewing kit + current sewing project (it's admittedly just a dice bag so it's relatively small for a sewing project but it's still cool that it fits !! )
3 playstation games and two playstation controllers
Still experimenting more. Thank you again, I can't wait until I have more income because i'm going to be getting so many more skirts and possibly shirts.
HAHA i love the amount of things that you've tried to fit in the pockets omg 😭
i'm glad you love the skirt so much and more than anything, i'm just relieved that shadow the hedgehog fits in the pockets. phew.
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twilightspinkyfinger · 4 months
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Bodyguard
This work is a part of my Hyrule Historian AU, for more information, check out my masterlist.
Although you had picked up some self-defense skills from Wild during your adventure together, being with the chain and traveling between the various eras of Hyrule still proved to be particularly dangerous for you.
As a historian, you were by no shock of the imagination not as talented in battle and the art of war as the men you were traveling with.
You had gotten used to avoiding the monsters of your own era and had picked up on some of their weak spots by studying Wild during his fights, but every new era led to new monsters for you to encounter.
At first, this fact of life was extremely exciting for you, as it itched that special part of your brain that craved knowledge. Not only could you study the history of Hyrule firsthand, but you could also study the monsters of these eras as well and expand upon your understanding of these creatures. You would jot down any finding after each battle in your journal.
However, soon you began to dread the monsters that would appear in each new location. You did very little learning of the eras you were in before a new portal would boot you to the next one, and with every time jump you were left in fear of the monsters that would soon find you.
You were rarely skilled enough to kill the monsters on your own, and sometimes the portals led to you getting separated from the rest of the chain. Other times the chain was too preoccupied in their own battles to keep you out of yours.
You of course never blamed the boys when this sort of thing would happen to you, but it did leave you with a pit of anxiety in your chest every time you entered a different part of Hyrule's history. The scars you had gained while being with the chain helped to cement this fear of the unknown and the damage it could inflict inside of your mind.
From the very beginning of your journey, Time and the rest of the chain established that your safety came above any of their own. After all, you were not a Hero of Courage like the rest of them, you were just a historian. A civilian who garnered their protection.
At first, you minorly protested this rule as you had been able to hold your own for the most part during your adventure with Wild back on your own Hyrule, however as the monsters and scenery continued to change around you and you had one too many close calls you quickly gave way to their rule.
In fact, the chain even decided to elect a member to become your official bodyguard in battle, someone who would travel beside you and hopefully be there to protect you from harm. The responsibility of the bodyguard did not fall onto any particular member of the chain, rather they took turns.
Once the bodyguard rule was established, you began to get closer to the various members of the chain. It also helped that at this point your travelling companions had realized that you and Wild were not in a romantic relationship.
The boys would also take turns trying to teach you new skills to protect yourself in the event that you would be forced to protect yourself. However, your body was not as used to the constant traveling and the little amount of sleep and nutrition you were getting. This circumstance led to you spending most of your free time recuperating and resting rather than training and preparing for battle.
You enjoyed being around all the members of the chain, but of course, you always had a couple favorites that you would look forward to spending every waking breathing moment with for however long the shift as your bodyguard lasted. Wild being your best friend before any of this mess started was definitely high on that list.
At the end of the day, you were just grateful for the extra layer of protection the boys gave you, even if they were the reason you were in most of the dangerous scenarios that you found yourself in. But these were some of your best friends, they were your family, and you wouldn't change that for the world.
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petrawood · 5 months
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I keep thinking about the Jonathan Harker Time Loop and how most posts are about the poor guy having flashbacks or trying to somehow sidestep The Horrors. You know, all reflection about how we see him.
But listen.
How about how HE sees US?
Imagine you are Jonathan Harker, and you are leaving for a work trip. You haven't really travelled much, and you are very excited, so you do research about that fascinating country called Transylvania, you write down your train schedules, the names of the cities you pass by, the recipes you find interesting or unfamiliar. You really want to remember everything, after all, you know you are going to spend some time away and you are sure Mina would love all the details of this little adventure! You are going to miss her so much, so making sure that everything is accurate so you can later faithfully recreate your journey makes you feel closer to her.
You could do without those weird dreams, though.
Moreover, since the beginning of your travels you have kept meeting more and more people.
They strike you as strange.
Most of them greet you as if you were old friends, clapping you in the back and talking about how happy it made them to receive the letter about your upcoming job trip, which you find mildly confusing, and the familiarity that they spark on the depths of your mind somewhat soothing.
Others smile at you and wish you fast and happy travels, something mournful gleaming in the depths of their eyes, and you feel like they are not really looking at you, but at some other man standing right behind you.
"Maybe this time it will go well, right?"
And you have nothing to say about that.
Some people you can tell recognize you, but don't really come near. They seem hesitant, and not as overtly familiar as the previous groups of people, acting instead in a manner more fitting to strangers. They follow you at a distance, looking torn between curiosity and dread, and you can tell that this is their fist time making this journey as well.
Then you get to Transylvania, and the entire crowd seems to go mad.
While you had only been meeting people in groups before, now they seem to cover almost every free inch of the country, coming together in thick clusters that somehow never actually seem to encumber your travel. They read what you write over your shoulder, they nod at the scenery and watch all the people getting in and out of your carriage.
They seem to be specially fond of the villagers, in spite of the country people's apparent lack of interest in them, since as far as you have seen the two groups never actually cross words.
In one particularly noteworthy morning you have paprika for breakfast, which is met with great approval by all.
You get closer to Castle Dracula, and the amount of people still increases, although a low number of them appear and disappear just as quickly, checking on you and then departing. They explain that they will come back later, or that they are waiting for someone else, and sometimes you swear you can hear the sound of waves in their steps.
Of the ones that stay, some get close enough to stand with you, while others prefer to stay by themselves, either taking notes on their own journals or -something that baffles you every single time you see it- sitting behind some kind of canvas and mixing colors while they wave away your worries at the bumping of the carriage ruining their work.
And at last, after weeks of travel that somehow only feel like three days, you arrive at Castle Dracula.
You stand before a great door, waiting for great man, while a great multitude surrounds you, all their eyes on you.
You hear steps approaching through the wood, and the very universe around you seems to hold their breath, waiting for the beginning of a path that seems new but well tread, a path that just for that endless second you feel extending behind and in front of you, strengthening and waning, with its first knot waiting at that door.
So the strong wood opens, a Count makes his greeting, and you, together with all the people next and behind you, friends new an old, step through the door.
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fatuismooches · 11 months
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omg omg how would fragile reader use foxtorre in gameplay? idk why the first thing i thought of is reader throwing it at their enemies but they wouldnt do that 😭 im suddenly thinking how their gameplay would be like, their vision, their idles, etc... IF YOU COULD PLEASE MAKE VOICELINES FOR THEM I THINK IT WOULD BE COOL
Fragile reader throws the creature onto the field to do the work for them! Depending on whether their skill is held or tapped, Foxttore will summon multiple little Puffttores that will attack enemies to heal the team or do damage, based on reader’s current HP. Using the skill also consumes a set amount of fragile reader's HP. But using their burst will let them recover HP, as they will steal a certain percentage of HP from their fellow party members. All they want to be is healthy, they can be a little selfish, no? But fragile reader isn’t that mean, they’ll grant the party members who they stole HP from a random buff (ATK, crit rate/dmg, EM, etc) so they can sit back and relax as the others fight for them. And no, they won’t steal HP from Dottore or another Harbinger on the team, that’s their beloved and their friends after all! But they can’t do elemental reactions, they don’t want that horrid thing from Celestia and even if they got one they would refuse to use it. (But I still have hope another element will be added, I cannot see Dottore using a Vision HE BETTER NOT he’s stronger than that 😞)
Their idles include pulling out Foxttore and squeezing it really tightly, and then they suddenly pause for a few seconds as they feel something fuzzy moving inside of their shirt... and then a few small Puffttores jump out of their clothes making them laugh :) Another one, i imagine they carry around a small bag to hold their necessary items (such as medication) but also to bring around a scrapbook they've made with all their memories. Lots of photos and journal entries spanning many years. They pull it out and flip through it, before sighing almost sadly and putting it away again. Their BIS weapon is the same one from centuries ago, Dottore had preserved it for all those years so they could use it once again (not really though because they wobble all over the place if you use their normal attacks)
Hello: "I am [Name]. I doubt I'll be much help to you, but I'm here now. By the way, I won't do anything I don't want to. If you have a problem with that, you can take it up with Dottore."
About the Archons: "... Do not mention them in front of me... it makes me sick to my stomach, thinking about the divine. However, there is one exception - the Tsaritsa of course. She is truly the epitome of what a God should be, benevolent and kind. I may not be able to help much, but I will support her until the end. When you meet her, Traveler, I hope you will understand her goals."
About the Illness: "Ah, my sickness... it has plagued me for countless years, laying a horrible curse upon my body and mind. It's... it's been quite difficult sometimes... er, forgive me. It's hard to speak about."
"Oh... to be honest, Paimon always thought you were faking it for the Fatui's goals to some extent."
"... this is why I only confide in Dottore."
About Dottore: "My one and only... words cannot express my tenderness and love toward him. Not once has he given up on me, despite the times I've given up on myself. And he has always taken care of me, not once faltering in over four hundred years. I- I don't know what to do sometimes when faced with that information. I wish I could be... less of a burden on him... *sigh*"
About the Akademiya: "Say, does anything good come out of that school anymore? Hm? You say a brilliant mage graduated from there and is now a librarian? Well, good for her. Who would want to be associated with them anyway? And there's also a doctor who's very sick, searching for the answer to immortality? Well now... how interesting."
About the Past: "You wish to know about my past? Well, there's not too much to say. I was a regular student in the Akademiya before I met Dottore, and we fell in love... we did many things together before I... It's not like it matters anymore, being the way I am now..."
Chat - The Body: “One’s body is extremely important, yet many take it for granted. Please, make sure to treasure and love your body. It does more for you than you could ever imagine.”
Chat - Walks: "I love taking walks. It seems so normal to you but, it brings me great happiness. Especially now... I have not felt the sun caress my body or the soft breeze sweep through my hair for a long, long time. Hm? I don't mind if you come with, but... Dottore will be joining me shortly. Would you like to see him? No? Hehe."
When it Rains: "Oh no... do you have an umbrella? Dottore's going to- a-achoo!- get mad at me for not taking care of myself properly..."
Likes - Dancing: "O-oh. You saw me just now? I was just... practicing. I'm not very good at it, but dancing with Dottore as he twirls me around makes me... happy. I just need to stop tripping and falling over his feet all the time."
Nahida - About You: "You've met the Doctor's spouse? Please, would you enlighten me about them some more? I have always been extremely curious about the kind of person who would capture his attention. Hmm... I see. Still sick, are they? Perhaps Dottore sees something in them that the rest of us cannot. Though, I have to commend their spirit. Being able to wake up every day and face what's in front of them while being afflicted with such a condition... takes a strong will."
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Since 2023, three articles have appeared in scientific journals, with 45 authors in all, arguing that the claims made on behalf of the wood-wide web have far outstripped the evidence. The objections are numerous. Many studies of inter-tree transfers have found only minuscule amounts of sugars shuttling between the trees – “statistically significant” but not necessarily “biologically significant”, one group of authors says – and most don’t rule out the possibility that the resources travelled through the air or soil rather than fungally. Despite Wohlleben’s insistence in Hidden Life that in a mycorrhizally conjoined forest “it is not possible for trees to grow too close to each other”, studies have not generally shown that seedlings ensconced in fungal networks do better when close to older trees (they often do worse). And although many trees are colonised by mycorrhizae, there is debate about whether those mycorrhizae actually form a durable network through which nutrients and signals could pass. Nature, the original venue for Simard’s research, recently ran an explosive news feature by Aisling Irwin on the “groundswell of unease” among ecologists with public discussions of mycorrhizal networks. Irwin reports on the scientists’ general scepticism and on a particular episode that has raised concerns. In her memoirs, Simard makes much of the idea that “mother trees” favour their kin. She describes in detail field research by her graduate student showing that seedlings placed in a fungal network “survived better and were noticeably bigger” if they were genetically related to nearby older trees. But that field study, the critics have noted, actually showed the opposite: the related seedlings were likelier to die, though the trend was not statistically significant. (Simard says that other studies by the student, from the laboratory, support her claims and she’d merely made a narrative choice to describe the results as emanating from the forest. “I do not, and would never, imply anything misleading when presenting research,” she told Irwin.) What makes the recent criticisms of Simard’s work so striking is that some come from her former colleagues and admirers. The first critical review of evidence was by three scientists – Justine Karst, Melanie Jones and Jason Hoeksema – who had all co-authored papers with Simard. The lead author, Karst, has discussed how she was inspired by Simard’s research to become a mycorrhizal ecologist. The second, Melanie Jones, appears in Simard’s memoirs as a hero who supported Simard when few others would. Jones co-authored the 1997 “wood-wide web” article, though she no longer stands fully by it. It was the cultural obsession with intelligent trees, from television shows to airport books, that impelled Karst, Jones and Hoeksema to reconsider their own earlier work. Simard, who is preparing detailed replies, regards these in-the-weeds debates as distracting from the urgent task of protecting forests. She has described the attention that Karst, Jones and Hoeksema’s criticisms have received as “an injustice to the whole world”. Perhaps, but it is exceedingly hard to read the recent reviews of evidence and retain faith in the wood-wide web as settled scientific fact. “Why do we so badly want this to be true?” Karst has asked. Maybe the unrelenting news of global warming and its attendant catastrophes – wildfires, hurricanes – has driven readers for respite toward calmer environmental stories. Or perhaps recent political cruelties have led us to seek reassurance that, in nature, beings are thoughtful and kind. The connective aspect seems important, too, as if trees’ fungal friendships could release us from our phone-checking isolation. Fairly or not, we’ve loaded our aspirations on to the forest: be the tree you want to see in the world.
[...]
A tree, Farmer writes, is “a radically nonhuman thing”, and a large, old tree is especially one. If trees have conceptual value, it is not because their similarity to us elicits our sympathy, but because their difference from us enlarges our horizons. They are the most visible markers on the evolutionary road not taken. Trees stand in for all the photosynthesising, carbon-dioxide breathing, fixed-in-place species that share our world yet have fundamentally different ways of living in it. Contemplating trees should be, above all, an exercise in humility. The mountains and woods, Santayana told his California audience, allow you to “take yourselves simply, humbly, for what you are, and to salute the wild, indifferent, non-censorious infinity of nature”. Perhaps the presence of beings older, larger and more numerous than we are – whether or not they resemble internet users or our mothers – can be a reminder that we are not everything, and that everything is not us. “Let us therefore be frankly human,” Santayana enjoined. And let the trees be trees.
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