#the [] are cuz it was my first ever fic too
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spookythesillyfella · 28 days ago
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ominous and threatening sketchy ... sniffle ...
★ some extra stuff under cut :
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some concept drawingz i made for the little guyz of an unfinished fic of mine
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and headshotz that i redrew digitally
#the bit where sketch iz quoting a bible verse iz based on the jacksfilms reactbot#like . i can't watch a clip of that thing saying that without thinking “damn . sketchbook core” for some strange reazon#why . of course !!! itz cuz hez an angel who can do no wrong !!! my sweet sweet guardian angel !!!#and the first one waz like . made ironically#i waz gonna do a follow-up drawing that would be like “cloze your eyez . spooky ...” while i writhed in bed – y'know mouthwashing reference#but whatever . therez alwayz next time#im have mixed thoughtz on the humanizationz – i still feel like shit when i think about that unfinished fic#i might tweak them if i ever try to finish that thing ; i just wonder if they'd hate me for thiz#sigh#dhmis#dhmis art#dhmis au#high voltage au#dhmis sketchbook#sketch the sketchpad#dhmis hv sketchbook#^ hez the only one from the hv au actually included#dhmis tony#tony the talking clock#dhmis colin#colin the computer#honestly . i felt kinda awkward giving sketch dimplez – ive had people tell me to smile less becauze they make me look bad in photoz#and like . i get it . theyre right – i don't want them to have to put up with that too#i just really wanted to project smth of my own onto them#i did the same with my acne . but actually i really love my acne . it makez me look masc az shit#now all i have to do iz get tonyz killer eyebagz and facial hair and id be perfect ....#i dropped the ball with the digital drawing'z coloring huh ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ#well . what can you really expect from me#i dunno#like and subscribe and comment what your opinionz on the conceptz are and maybe i won't burn my house down !!!
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marshmellowtea · 28 days ago
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sandra telling chris that she's pregnant and chris immediately getting worried cuz he knows she's had complicated feelings on the idea of motherhood before and the past few pregnancy scares she's had had made her anxious and need to lean on him, but this time she just smiles and tells him that it's time, she's ready and she actually wants this now, and he just laughs in relief and disbelief and hugs her and spins her around because now that he knows it's a joyous thing he's so happy for her, he's going to be an uncle now and her and max are going to be incredible parents and he loves them more than anything........
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speakofthedebbie · 4 months ago
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happy 6 month anniversary to my first ever [hazbin] fic!!! i dry-heave every time i think about you!!!
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potatobugz · 2 years ago
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biggest problem with writing is that I have all the ideas and themes I want to express in my head, but when I try to write it down the words come out. wrong
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asherthehimbo · 5 months ago
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anyway little rant(?) under the cut feel free to ignore
when I say im San and Changbin I MEAN IT
I don’t think you guys understand
like they're ME, IM THEM, our personality's, fears, mottos, goals, values are all so similar, it's actually terrifying ngl. Like SO much of my life was things I couldn't put into words until they verbalized them and I was like "BRO THATS LITERALLY ME WHAT"
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mishy-mashy · 9 months ago
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Hi! I noticed you bring up fanfiction every once in a while, so do you have an ao3?
I DO
But the stuff I post here isn't actually written out and posted anywhere else, and my ao3 (posted stories) is pretty bare. Like, I only touch it to read other people's stuff at this point
Everything I do write is OC stuff though, and that's not everyone's jam
The stuff I do post here all comes from my notes for said fic ideas. They're all fleshed out enough that I can write them into proper stories. Like, the whole plot is figured out, I know where to end, character perspectives, all that jazz. I just don't write them out, since I don't have that motivation, and the stories would end up huge
I don't like posting the actual stories either. People have asked for updates on the new chapters I just put down, and I've run into a lot of copy-pasters. Even the few things I have on ao3 is having a mimic somewhere. So I otherwise keep everything to myself, or post little things here
I've been going through my past stuff lately to reorganize. It's fun. Even if they're old (some are over 5 years old), I find little gems that surprise me like these
(Unordinary; Re:Zero; BNHA)
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Like- they aren't that bad. That's surprising. How old are these things???
#/THE FIRST ASK ABOUT MY FIC STUFF?!/#anon take this crown and commemorative sash this is monumental#ask#fic#my drafts are HUGE so writing them into actual proper fanfics would be. very big#the average is 150k words the low-end is 40k and a lot of them have too many words that google docs glitches#and ive had to make multiple drafts to hold everything#i tried writing one out once and ended up stopping because the glitching from all the words was making it impossible to continue#capped out at *checks notes* 103k words#the word count mentioned in the previous tags are talking about the word count for NOTES. i think an actual story would become abysmal#i like planning stuff. a lot#the biggest one is for a bnha resistance fic at *checks calculator* 260k words#but its really unmotivating to know people just want content and to take my words for their own#REPEATEDLY. even the small stuff is being yoinked#im serious. Actually everything ive posted as an actual story has been copied by someone else and advertised as their own. im tired of that#but i like writing so i do it in private. mainly away from the eyes of the internet#excerpt from an old unordinary fic#and a rezero fic where groovy gets hugged and is screaming like hes watching his firstborn be slaughtered before his eyes#my drafts surprise me sometimes because huh. this is not that bad for 6 years ago#an unordinary (webtoon) excerpt cuz i was organizing my stuff and ran into an old draft of it. now its trying to weedle its way to the ligh#thank u for the ask anon#if someone asked for more about the small things i /do/ show id probably panic cuz. no one ever asks. what do i say??? oh no im CRINGE#/lh#a lot of nonrom actually. most of it is. including that 3rd excerpt#all the excerpts actually#oc#out of context excerpts
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ohitslen · 2 years ago
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OH WAIT I HAVENT SAID IT YET BUT I HAVE READ THE FICS YOU GUYS HAVE RECOMMENDED TO ME SO UH THANKS THEY ARE SUPER AWESOME‼️‼️ I LOVED THEM THANKS MUA MUA MUA
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aria0fgold · 4 months ago
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I got reminded of my Wretched fic again and I reeeeeaaaally wanna disown that thing but I won't... Instead I need to bury it. My actual motivation in coming back to ao3 is burying my wretched child.
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waywardsalt · 10 months ago
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for the zelda ask game: 🎭😔👊⛩️
🎭 When you play Zelda games, do you imagine being Link yourself, or is Link a separate character to you? Basically, are you Link, or is Link a separate character?
I always consider Link to be his own separate character. There's juuust enough to him most games that he has his own character, and I'm not usually one to go full self-insert with video game characters unless that's what the game is really going for. So I generally consider him to be his own separate character.
😔 Least Favorite Zelda character?
Hhhmmmmmmm normally I would say Jolene (and i think she was my answer for a similar ask game a few years ago) but I'm trying to get myself to at least somewhat appreciate her so it would be kind of counterproductive to say it's her. But it's Jolene.
👊 Favorite Zelda Villain/Boss?
Yeah no Bellum is my favorite Zelda villain... also my favorite boss! I think he's a silly little thing and a lot of fun to think wayyyy to hard about and I really like the variety between the three segments of his extended fight, plus just on a story level his whole fight is really cool. I would normally say I wish more was done with him but I can make do with crumbs so it's fine actually. I kind of want a little plushie of him.
⛩️ Favorite Zelda Dungeon/Location?
Hm... it's hard to decide on just one favorite dungeon, I've always been fond of albw's dungeons and both oot and mm have really good dungeons, but I think I'd have to pick the fire sanctuary from Skyward Sword. I really like sksw's dungeons a lot, and the fire sanctuary especially just... looks really nice and is fun to spend time figuring out. I think it's the one I enjoy the most, while the others are just fine or have some snag to them. With locations, I’m a fan of albw’s Hyrule and Lorule, and Clock Town is probably my favorite town in the entire series.
#asks#doomed-era#salty talks#loz#legend of zelda#very phantom hourglass brained but sksw also owns me in a sense. big fan of control schemes that everyone else hates#not gonna tag games or anything this took me long enoguh so maybe ill be quick in tags? likely not#genuinely struggled to think of any other loz characters i actively dislike beyond a little eh i dont like em#cuz either i just dont really care? or i generally like em jolene might be the only loz character i genuinely cannot stand#its that combo of annoying game mechanic and character traits/personality/whatever thats just like. man i dont enjoy this at all#anyways. i think the general control scheme of sksw and the fact that i tend to play standing up helps me enjoy the dungeons a lot more#also they just are really cool. i love albw's dungeons sm and oot + mm dungeons are incredible but ough sksw#ph is fine lol. as much as i love it the dungeons are eh theyre serviceable theyre fine#i think some loz characters i kinda dont like are like. botw/totk link (oversaturation and totk taints everything it touches for me) that#one creep by gerudo town in botw/totk mayyyybe tingle but thats nothing new uuhhhh. god i dont really have any i dont like#cuz like with botw/totk none of the characters get enough screentime for me to give much of a shit#and for the other games i generally like all of the characters? its the fuckin. ph tunnel vision i have the strongest feelings abt ph#i do like the temple of the ocean king. and a minor location i like is that one island with the fairy upgrade spring thing#its a neat little island. and link just has too much going on w/ his place in the story and whatever that hes his own thing for me#also like. as. a fic writer. i kind of have to view link as his own separate character anyways#skyward sword scratches an itch in my brain i love the gameplay sm. i also really love its visual style its a nice game to look at#oot and mm are just like. good??? i replayed oot recently and ofc its fucks but i need to replay mm so bad i dont think ive ever replayed i#im just extremely fond of albw since its the first loz game i actually finished and i just spent a lot of time with it while younger
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domoriu · 4 months ago
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Pookie bear if you ever get the time can you recommend your favorite fics that you’ve read🙏🏿
oh i love this question… also just a warning its 95% haechan and mark lee fics 😭 i can do another part to this too if yall want 🤫 maybe with like bnd fics ? or enhypen or something idk just lmk
kiwis fic recs !!
pussy fiend - haechan // u guys dont even understand how much i love this fic. its been 2 and a half years and im still here. like i re read it every other month. i remember exactly where i was when i read it too. like oh my god its so fucking good 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 domjaehyun you will always be famous to me please dont ever die
real talk - mark // wow. 5 stars no notes. yes.
risk it all - haechan // mhmmm 😋😋
kiss you right now - mark // also super good… like wowie….
sure thing - haechan // yeah… yeah. 😭
my words, your thoughts - haechan // so beautifully written omg… like i honestly forgot there would even be smut at the end cuz i was so invested in the story its just so good. i re read it recently and just yeah.
first love - soobin // SUCH A GOOD SERIES i loved reading this so much when it came out i still re read it sometimes… tooooooo good
mine too - haechan ft. jaehyun // really good… recently re read it and its still so good…
untitled - markhyuck // my two ults. yes. so good. fantastic give me 14 of them right now.
the boy - sunwoo // ONE OF MY FAVORITES. LITERALLY SO GOOD AND JUST UGH. LIKE RHE BUILDUP TO THEM GETTING TOGETHER. YES.
cream of the crop - changkyun // i dont usually read for monsta x but this fic has had me in a chokehold for YEARS it still does like i dont play about this fic oh my god… please
gelato - mark // the yearning… yes… like oh yeah. just yeah.
i definitely have a lot more…. literally just scroll through @haechanfart where i reblog a lot of my favorites (its mainly haechan and mark lee but theres like 4 enhypen fics in there from like 2022 if you scroll down enough 😭)
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 1 year ago
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katsuki’s masterlist ♡ !
lil blurbs ! ( i'm just talkin'):
katsuki likes to make you laugh
katsuki's love language
katsuki is so dramatic
katsuki likes to bite you
childhood bodyguard! katsuki
katsuki x popstar! reader
katsuki is fun to mess with
katsuki really likes the way you smell
hockey player! bakugou
sleepy kisses w katsuki
katsuki and compliments
katsuki doesn't give a fuck
goodnight kiss (or the one where katsuki isn’t good at asking for, well…anything.)
suck up katsuki
could've fooled me ( or the one where you peel your orange yourself and katsuki is not happy)
katsuki and your naps (or the one where katsuki hates kaminari)
katsuki is a big baby
katsuki and (non sexual) hickies ! more !
no good thief ! (or the one where katsuki finds out who’s been stealing his clothes)
sleeping on the couch
katsuki and petnames…kinda
katsuki in a suit
katsuki is dramatic again (or the one where katsuki isn’t worried..really.)
katsuki and ice cream
katsuki and changing
katsuki doesn't give a fuck, again !
your almost boyfriend katsuki
baby suki
katsuki accidentally hurts you
the outside world
katsuki and goodbye kisses
katsuki and i miss you's
katsuki's scarf
katsuki the comedian
katsuki and your birthday
katsuki texting hcs !
crybaby katsuki
get me some ramen pls!
katsuki and physical affection
kitsuki :3
lil fics ! ( i ramble a little longer) :
katsuki is in trouble
katsuki's extra clingy when he's sleepy
from the start (or the one where you've been katsuki's for as long as you can remember)
you are not the father ! (or watching the maury show with katsuki)
katsuki hates seeing you cry
unchanged apologies (or the one where katsuki's childhood habits remains the same)
fire-breathing roommate chronicles (or living w dragon bkg)
baking cookies with katsuki
can't love anyone more than you
katsuki can't say no to you (not that he wants to) (or the one where katsuki takes care of you after you get drunk) part two !
déjà vu : ( or the one where katsuki thinks about you) bnha manga spoilers !!
the bet (or the one where your classmates make a bet.)
this night has opened my eyes (or the one where katsuki cleans up your injuries)
valentine's day troubles (or the one where katsuki's friends help him out for valentines day )
boyfriend for sale ! (or the one where your boyfriend forgets to ask you to be his valentine) feat. shoto todoroki !
ewww, katsu's got cooties ! (or the one where katsuki is too cool for cooties)
two of hearts (or the one where katsuki wakes up) bnha manga spoilers !!
31 days (or the one where katsuki surprises you)
habits (or little habits katsuki's developed ever since he's met you) slight bnha manga spoilers !!
while i search for the way to your world, leave a mark on your way (or the one where katsuki has his first real fight with you)
jealous, jealous, jealous girl ! (or the one where your boyfriend gets too much attention)
half return (or the one where katsuki decides to go home for the weekend and brings you with him) bnha manga spoilers !!
black coffee (or the one where katsuki hates it)
power outage (or the one where katsuki always lights up the way for you)
sick days (or the one where katsuki takes care of you when you’re sick)
operation : trouble in paradise ! (or the one where katsuki tries to get his bf privileges back)
memory box (or the one where you take katsuki on a trip down memory lane)
tell me why..your hands are cold (or the one where katsuki is definitely better than the heater)
coming home (or the one where things are just more convenient with katsuki)
chicken scratches (or the one where katsuki's hand writing is atrocious and you love it) slight bnha manga spoilers !!
longer fics / mini series ! ( get comfy 'cuz this one's a multi-parter !) :
♡ fire-breathing roommate chronicles !♡ when an injured, mysterious, and incredibly handsome dragon man blasts through the wall of your apartment, you decide to let him stay with you until he's fully healed. despite the struggles of co-habitating with a mythical beast, his mysterious past and annoyingly sharp tongue, you find you can't help feeling drawn to him..
♡ fire-breathing boyfriend chronicles ! ♡ some short ‘n sweet little extra’s following the events of fbrc starring our favorite now dragon boyfriend bakugou !
ring pop proposal ♡ 1 2 3 ♡ the three times where mitsuki realizes that her katsuki is in love with you (and she realizes you love him back)
♡ ring pops, chocolates proposals ! ♡ katsuki loves you throughout the years.
an explosive birthday (collab event for the days leading up to katsuki's birthday !) see masterlist
shadows of affection : orphaned at a young age, katsuki knows nothing but endless violence and the feeling of his bruised and bloody knuckles. until he gets taken in by a mob boss and is tasked to become his daughter's bodyguard..
and then some more ! ( extra's !)
the morning after : katsuki confronts you about what you told him the night you got drunk
♡ fire-breathing boyfriend chronicles ! ♡ some short ‘n sweet little extra’s following the events of fbrc starring our favorite now dragon boyfriend bakugou !
♡ ring pops, chocolates proposals ! ♡ katsuki loves you throughout the years.
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bookshelf-dust · 2 months ago
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change my mind
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carmen berzatto x fem!reader
gif by @emziess
word count: 1,876
warnings: swearing, sugar is still pregnant for the sake of this fic, some playful shouting/sibling behavior, clingy and petty carmy, smooching, barely proofread cuz i’m lazy lol
synopsis: carmy takes it personally when you tell him he has separation anxiety. he just wants you to stay with him all the time. since when is that a problem?
a/n: yes, this is absolutely a fic inspired by and named after a one direction song. i’m healing my inner child and this song just never, ever gets old, lemme’ tell you. with my winter break getting closer, i desperately need some clingy carmy.
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“Natalie!” You practically screech, embracing the woman, arms strong around her shoulders but going easy with how close you bring yourself to her growing belly. She smiles and laughs into your hair. You both sway back and forth, secretly thinking how good it is to be in another sane person's presence. 
Sugar says your name in the sweetest tone, the kind that, even though she’s hugging you, gives away the grin on her face. “I’m so glad you’re here! I’ve been dying to have some girl time, I swear.”
You both turn at the sound of the door slamming shut, as though someone has kicked it closed with their heel. 
Carmy holds a tray of food up above yours and his sisters head. “Good to see you too, Sug. I’m okay with being chopped liver, it’s fine.”
You hear Pete’s voice from behind you. It echoes a little with the windows open, allowing the cool air to seep in. “It’s that girl bond, am I right?” 
Natalie pulls away and covers her hand with her mouth. Carmy snorts, patting Pete on the back. “Yeah, man. Sure is.”
Then he makes eye contact with his sister. “You know, you could’ve just invited one of us, seeing as all I’m good for is dropping off food.”
Sugar’s socked feet pad across the floor, the squishy spheres of gel sticking and unsticking with each step she takes. Her arms come up around Carmen’s neck and she pulls him into a hug before smacking him on the head. 
“What the fuck, dude?”
Nat gives him an extra squeeze and clears her throat, taking on her worst, but best, male voice. “What the fuck, dude? How could you hit me like that?”
He shoves her away, but you catch how gentle it is, considering she is carrying his niece. “I do not sound like that. And why are you wearing fuckin’ hospital socks around the house?”
“Pete suggested they’d be good while I’m pregnant since I’m so clumsy.”
“They’ve worked pretty well so far,” he chimes in, peeking into one of the trays of food you brought. You go over to him and open it fully, whispering that he can go ahead and eat, if he’s ready. To Pete, if you said it’s alright, it’s like nothing else can touch him. 
“I can get you some, Bear,” you say. “All you gotta do is ask, they’re like a dollar at Walmart.”
“Okay, let’s just eat, alright?” He fusses, though there’s that telltale dimple appearing on his face. He drags a tense hand through his hair. 
“Yes, chef.”
You’re in the first year of your masters program, and when you called Carmy a few weeks ago to tell him the dates for your fall break, you both decided you didn’t feel up to a stereotypical Thanksgiving this time around. Spending a day with Natalie and Pete seemed much more appealing than waiting for an inevitable panic attack from Carm and a full-on fight, political or not, from any given Berzatto or uncle on your mother’s side of the family. 
You’ve spent the past three nights in Carmy’s apartment, but you’re heading back to campus tomorrow morning so that you can focus on submitting your finals and tying up any loose ends. You told him ahead of time that you only planned to stay for a few days, knowing yourself and knowing that the longer you let yourself stay, the harder it would be to head back and finish up the fall semester. 
Besides, it would only be a bit longer until you could settle in with him for winter break. 
Nevertheless, Carmy was grumpy. He was trying to hide it from you because of course your decision was logical, but he is a selfish man. If it was up to him, you’d stay with him every day of the year and let him treat you like a princess. 
Each time you catch him frowning, you remind him that you’ll be coming home to him again in a matter of days. There’s a miniature whiteboard on his refrigerator that you found in the dollar section at Target. It was meant to hang on the wall, but you hot glued little circle magnets on the back four corners. Carmy laughs every time he sees it because he’s splashed something on the fridge door and needs to wipe it clean. You took the lone, failing dry-erase marker from the kitchen drawer and doodled a little calendar on it.
You drew two slightly uneven squares for your countdown. Currently each block has a number, but you know he’ll feel better when the left spot loses any number higher than 0. 
All throughout dinner, Carmy’s hand is at the small of your back, your knee, your bicep, the nape of your neck, resting on your wrist so he can feel your pulse. Like he’s afraid you are about to slip out of his grasp, only to be swept away by the current and never seen again. 
Sugar clears her throat, tucking a chunk of hair behind her ear and wiping her mouth on a paper napkin. “Someone piss in your cornflakes, Carm?”
He blinks over at her, practically jumping at being noticed. You can see his fingertips glistening with sweat under the fluorescent dining room lights. 
You have a forkful of pasta in your mouth, but you begin to chew with haste, shaking your head to try and redirect the conversation. 
You swallow, “It was me, Nat.”
“What?” she asks, voice raising a tinge. “Are you guys having a fight or something? Oh god, should I have said I was sick tonight?”
Pete coughs, his cheeks red as he fights his body’s urge to choke on the food he’s shoving in his mouth to avoid anything slightly awkward. 
The knees of Carmen’s jeans rub together when he sits back further in the dining chair, the sound of the denim, scratchy and rough, communicating his pouty demeanor as he crosses his arms.
“She’s leaving me,” he deadpans.
Forks clatter across plates. “What the fuck, Carm? Are you serious?” He laughs to himself because that vein is protruding from Natalie’s forehead. You elbow him in the ribs. 
You exhale hard enough that Pete feels it on the other side of the table.
“I am not leaving him. He’s pitching a fit because I’m going back to campus tomorrow so that I can focus on finals.”
Natalie’s eyes swing back and forth between the two of you like she’s watching a tennis match. 
“She thinks I’m a distraction,” Carmy says. 
“No duh,” Sugar laughs. “You’re the ultimate distraction. Hell, you’re made of distractions, what with all that unmedicated ADHD.”
“No duh? What are we, five? Y-you think I’m incapable of supporting my girlfriend’s ambitions because I’m some deranged, like fucking—some koala bear?”
Sugar nods once, affirmatively. 
“Yes.”
Carmy scoffs. 
You throw back the rest of your wine and put out a hand like a cop directing traffic would. “Alright, that’s enough. Let’s finish eating, okay? I’ll deal with Carmy’s separation anxiety later tonight.”
He looks at you like he’s been slapped, that crinkle between his brows forming, followed shortly by the appearance of his frown lines. “I do not have separatio—”
“Good garlic bread, huh?” Pete says, crunching loudly. “There fancy butter in this?” 
————
“I can’t believe you think I have separation anxiety!”
“You do have separation anxiety, baby.”
Carmen shrugs off his coat and tosses it at the arm of the couch, but he misses and it slides right off. What a perfect metaphor for his life right now. 
“Just because I’m sad that you’re leaving me?”
“I’m not leaving you, Bear. I’m going to campus so I can ensure I get all my shit done.”
“And you can’t do that here? You already told me you don’t have any in-person finals. You’re submitting everything online, so you don’t have to go back—not really. I must really be a bother, huh?”
He regrets it already, but his petty, pitiful brain quit thinking logically about half an hour ago. 
“Carmen. Anthony. Berzatto.”
He winces. The day Sugar told you his middle name was his last day of peace. He’d had you half-convinced he just didn’t have one because he was the baby and Donna was tired of coming up with names. 
You take his face in your hands, your grip on his cheeks much gentler than the look you’re giving him. 
“Carmen. Listen to me, alright? When I’m here with you, I’m in a state of like, pure bliss. I don’t want to think about my assignments because you make me so content and happy, and you’re so stupidly cute that I just want to look at you all day and I know I won’t be productive because of it.”
Carmy’s eyes flash. His cheek twitches under your thumb where the muscles around his mouth are fighting an involuntary smile. 
His gaze flickers down to your lips when you start grinning as you speak.
“I just want to do really well on my finals, Carm. I’ve worked so hard this semester, and I want to give it my all and finish strong, you know? It’s the fact that I have no self control and would have to pull myself away from you to get work done.”
Carmy blinks at you. “I promise I can keep from distracting you. I’ll even set you up a workspace and bring you lunch or somethin’. So you can do your shit and not be bothered. We could make Richie buy you coffee.”
You laugh. 
“I’m serious,” Carmen continues. “I can be accommodating.”
You take your hands away from his face and step back, setting your fingers against your hips like that’s going to help you think better. He’s already winning you over, but you still want to do all the responsible things. 
There’s a kind of humorous tension in the room. 
Carmy is waiting for you to speak, and you’re trying to pretend like it’s a hard decision to make. If he’s serious about helping you stay focused, there’s no reason you couldn’t just go ahead and stay. 
You inhale, just to make Carmy cringe and brace himself. 
“Baby…if you say you want me to stay, I’ll change my mind.”
“I want you to stay!” Carmy blurts. “Please. I’ll get down on my fuckin’ knees if you really want me to. Stay. I promise I’ll keep out of your hair and help you be productive.” 
You giggle, soft and slow, and it reaches Carmy’s ears, enchanting him like you’re made of some love potion, whatever ingredients you’d need for that sort of thing running through your veins. 
“I’d already pretty much decided on staying right after we left Nat’s.”
Carmy swats you playfully on the hip. “Oh, fuck off! Maybe you should go back, if you’re gonna be so mean to me.” He turns to walk towards the kitchen, glancing at you over his shoulder. 
You move quickly, launching yourself off the floor and landing on his back. He hoists you up, bursts of laughter leaving his throat. 
“You love it when I’m mean to you,” you say, and you press a kiss to the side of his neck, all warm and sickly sweet. 
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note: none of the gifs or images i use are mine! i get most of my images from pinterest or here, and gifs from about the same. please let me know if i ever don’t credit someone properly!
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hannieehaee · 2 months ago
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First of all 'closer' is one of the greatest svt fics i've ever read. I could just feel all the wild butterflies aaaaaaaaaa and I still reread it from time to time
Also I've been thinking about mean dom jeonghan a lottttt. So can I request dom jeonghan x reader with like lots of nipple play (idk how you feel abt anal but if you're uncomfortable no need to add it!)
Feel free to scrape this if you're uncomfortable or simply not interested <3
18+ / mdi
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content: softdom!jeonghan cuz im really bad at writing doms oops, nipple play, smut, dry humping, anal fingering and anal penetration, afab reader, teasing, jh is an asshole lmao, etc.
wc: 1427
a/n: thank u so much!!! thats my most popular fic haha i had no idea people would like it this much but it makes me so happy<33
a/n 2: also can u tell idk anything about anal oops</3
masterlist
"told you not to argue back, baby. now look where your bad behavior got you."
every word that left his lips did so condescendingly. had it been anyone else (or even under a different context), you wouldve argued back, protected your dignity.
but this was jeonghan. and you were sitting between his legs as you suffered through every one of his touches.
maybe suffering was a bit harsh, but that's exactly how it felt at the moment. his hands had not stopped their torture in the past hour, alternating between circling your clit and finding their way north and on your nipples, liberal in the way he pulled and twisted at them.
endless whines and breaths of frustration left you (meddled in with sounds of genuine pleasure), which you were sure went straight to the length currently pressed up against your back.
"you know this isn't the worst of it, right, baby?", he taunted, "wait til i get my hands to even more fun places. or when i finally put my mouth on you," you could hear the mischief in his voice.
and soon enough, he made good on his word. before even realizing what happened, you were on your back and your gremlin of a boyfriend was smirking above you as he leaned down to kiss at your chest.
it started off slow, soft, just as everything did with jeonghan. but it evolved into teasing and eye-watering. his lips wrapped around your nipple, eyes still on your face as he sucked at it. soft wafts of air were let out against your skin as he breathed through his nose, mouth too occupied on your tits.
"you're so fucking soft, baby. so pretty," and despite the teasing, he continued to be sweet to you.
the juxtaposition between the pleasure from his words and his lack of finesse while sucking at your tits made goosebumps form on your skin. your hand found his hair, pushing him closer, wanting more of both the softness and the harshness.
"love when i play with your tits, don't you, baby? naughty thing," he chuckled, finding your other boob.
meanwhile, his hips had been grinding into your own, molding against them while he entertained himself with your boobs. one of his hands laid itself next to your head to hold himself up while the other played with your neglected tit. you were thoroughly stimulated, yet you knew jeonghan would somehow try to go even further.
and you were proven correctly when his hand left your boob to find its way between your legs. but unexpectedly to you, instead of moving to play with your clit, he bypassed it to reach lower. your body followed with his silent desire, scooting up to give him access.
it was unspoken. his mouth remained occupied with your chest, leaving it more raw and sensitive by the second. his fingers found your hole while you were distracted by his mouth nibbling and pulling at your left nipple, gasping out at both the sudden intrusion and the bite.
"like that, baby? shit, so tight for me. can't wait to see how tight you'll be around my cock," he breathed out as if picturing it.
it didn't take him long to find that spot that had your eyes rolling back. and in usual jeonghan fashion, he made liberal use of it, taking turns in stimulating it and missing it altogether just to get you to cry out in frustration.
"god, you're so easy, baby. i can touch you anywhere and you cry," he chuckled, "such a sensitive little thing."
with his lips still on your chest, he mocked your moans between flicks of his tongue. it was too much. your breasts were overriding with sensitivity, but it felt too good to tell him to stop. you couldn't make a sound anymore. all that left you were hiccuped gasps or silent whines.
at every whine leaving your lips, jeonghan hummed into your chest, encouraging the sounds you made for him and even mocking you at times. it was so frustrating, so damn annoying, but it felt too good for any words of complaint to actually leave your lips.
"you know i won't make you cum, right, baby?", and his fingers suddenly left you. you could feel a smirk and the vibration of a cackle against your tit.
your whine of complaint was only met by a bite to your nipple, making you whine even louder.
"tsk, it's so hard having such a whiny girl begging me to touch her 24/7," he feigned annoyance, "but, maybe if you get on all fours for me, i might consider fucking you," he said it with a patronizing tone that made you want to sock him in the face, but you knew your body.
and so when he distanced himself from you, you willingly turned around, using your elbows for support as you lifted your hips up for him to take into his hands, positioning you against his crotch and teasingly grinding against you.
"see what a good girl you are? you deserve a reward, angel."
instead of reaching into the drawer for the usual condom, you heard the clacking of items as he blindly pulled out a bottle. you heard him struggle to open, letting out a few very jeonghan-like sounds as he opened the lube and squirted out a generous amount on his hands.
being the annoying tease he was, he made sure to slip his fingers in once again, muttering some half-assed excuse that he wanted to check just one last time to see if you were ready for him. your complains were met by a squeeze of your hips and a childish bite to your left hip.
"be good, baby. you were being so good, don't stop now," he tsk'd, "i'll give it to you now, okay?"
it wasn't often that jeonghan made use of your other hole. it was usually saved for special occasions. something about wanting to enjoy it as an extra treat every so often. some very jeonghan reason.
it was a bit of a struggle, but you were always reminded of how worth it it was when you'd hear his moans of struggle as he attempted not to cum within the first few seconds inside you.
"always so tight through here, baby. fucking strangling my dick," he sighed, "but you're ready for me, right, pretty? need me to fuck you now?"
you wailed at him when his hand rounded you, teasing at your clit as his hips began to move behind you. the angle must've been a little awkward for him, but he made it work. he made it work far too good.
"oh god, baby, fuckin' made for me, huh?", he groaned out.
the room was filled with jeonghan's occasional whining and the rhythmic slapping of skin. you were mostly mute, only crying out when he decided to hump at you extra hard in hopes of that exact effect.
"can never last when you're this tight," he whined, "so mean to me. always making me cum so soon," he complained in between thrusts.
he became frantic then, pushing you further into the bed, resulting in your head pressing up on the comforter and drooled. you were a mess, but you were comforted in the fact that jeonghan wasn't likely to be faring any better.
"hannie ..." was all you could mumble as your words muffled. you wanted to warn him, but he knew your body so well that he already knew.
"i know, baby, me too. let go, angel," he sighed out one last time.
you might've blacked out a bit. or maybe he did. perhaps both. it wasn't long til you found yourself lying on that exact same position, except jeonghan was no longer inside you but rather doing his weak attempt at flipping you over so you could cuddle him despite the mess forming between you.
"you make this so hard for me when you pass out," he grumbled jokingly, finally getting you to nuzzle into his neck.
his lips kissed at any area available, even ending up at your arm and sternum at some point. he didn't usually care as long as he was kissing you.
"then don't fuck my ass, you idiot," you bit at his arm, earning a 'wah!" from him.
"brat."
"says you."
he chuckled, giving you a peck on your lips this time.
"i'll give you five minutes before another failed attempt at cleaning you up," he warned.
"sure, old man."
and that earned you a bite in return.
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inkirasity · 3 months ago
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HOW DO THEY KISS
♱ includes: takakura "okarun" ken, enjoji "jiji" jin, ayase momo, zuma unji
♱ warnings: character/s from the manga
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OKARUN
he was nervous at first. he overthinks every aspect of the kiss. okarun is the type of person to rehearse how to lean in, how to angle his head, and whether he should close his eyes. all of that just to fail his kiss to you. it was messy, he couldn’t stop shaking and sweating as his lips were puckered out while touching yours, his eyes were shut closed too scared to open it ever again. and after the kiss he would blush crazy, red as a tomato. he would shout (unintentionally) “was it okay?!”
JIJI
oh don’t even expect a non-funny way for him to kiss you tbh. jiji’s kisses are unpredictable and loooves to catch you off-guard to see your embarrassed expression. like he would kiss you on the cheek quickly following to your lips. though at times he is actually an endearing guy, brushing your hair away and cup your cheeks before leaning into a sweet kiss. he’s also cheeky afterwards, saying, “see, told ya i’d make your heart race”
MOMO
momo’s kisses are actually straightforward yet sincere. not a person with big gestures or any of those super romantical kisses. she kisses you as if she’s anchoring you to the moment, her lips warm and steady against yours. momo might hold your hand or gently brush her fingers along your jaw. she is also a tease, “i think you’ve got something on your lips”
ZUMA
he has this old school romantic thing where he’ll hold your hand or place his palm on your waist. his kisses are slow and gentle, taking both of your time like no one’s around and he makes sure you feel cherished. after the kiss, he would rest his forehead against yours and says something like, “you deserve everything”
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a/n: hey y'all thank you sm cuz i js got back to tumblr from a busy week and my notifs were BOMBARDED. it's super short tho i have some drafts waiting. but anws thanks again! about adding Saint-Germain, it might take a while since we haven't known him a lot in the recent manga just a couple chapters of him so it'll be a little tricky trying to make a fic about him, tho he's in my list already!
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choccy-milky · 18 days ago
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LMAOO thank you for your efforts and also for putting this cursed image in my head....between being a beater AND making the trek up to the ravenclaw tower constantly/every morning to pick up clora, seb never skips a workout💪
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@myfangirlinessononeblog BAHAHA DONT WORRY ABOUT IT GIRL!! ill admit tho when i got the preview for your ask which just showed me "id like to apologize for my previous ask" i was like oh god...what did she send me that warrants an apology???😰 but this was so funny to me LOOL esp bc i thought everyone already knew that "spoiler" of sebs "death" by now, so its always fun to see when someone hasnt been on my blog for long/reads my fic first and then gets to it HAHA. also i love the manic energy of not being able to wait between chaps and NEEDING to vent to me LOOL relatable... weve all been there girly🤝🤝 (and im glad u liked seb beating himself up over being dead for TOO long BAHAH that really is so him...😭bro needs to relax) BUT THANK YOU ALSO!! IM GLAD YOU'RE ENJOYING IT!!💖💖💖
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@nerdycollectionstrawdewfan i want to do this so bad!! i just still havent got around to getting to that quest yet bc ive still barely started my second HL playthru bahha, and i want to experience the quest myself rather than watch it on youtube, BUT TRUST ME ITS DEFS SOMETHING IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT/WANTING TO DO!! and THANK YOUU💖💖
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@jax-the-kneecapper BAHAH AWW TYY RIGHT BACK AT YOU🫂💖💖😭 and i mean if its to keep someone alive i guess i have no choice but to continue🫡👩‍⚕️👩‍⚕️thank u for the excuse🥰
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BAHA I DO!! idk if you saw my last ask but i have a pregnancy oneshot in the works!! but unlike what i say there, it probs wont be finished by this month at the rate im going😭 BUT IT IS COMING!! and after that i have a really reallllyyy short oneshot (probs like 5k words. short for ME, that is) thats kinda dark/about yandere seb. but also dont worry about pressuring me cuz IM GLAD YOU WANT MORE OF THEM, IT JUST MOTIVATES ME!! SO THANK YOU💖💖💖🥹
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and speaking of motivation!! THANK YOUU im glad you liked it and that you not only got attached to my ver of seb but even to clora as well!!😭ill defs keep writing for them as long as the ideas are still there, thank YOU for reading and for the lovely message!!💖💖💖
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decided to end this off with the most UNHINGED ask i have EVER RECIEVED LMAOOOOOO GIRLLLLLLLL???? ok a lot to unpack here first of all im OBSESSEDDDD with the fact that after seeing that sight, ONE OF THE FIRST THINGS YOU THOUGHT OF WAS SEB AND CLORA??? LMFAOO AND SEBS REACTION TO IT😭😭😭IM FUCKING CRYINN GGGG LIKE SERIOUSLY....and second clora will ALWAYS be sebs fav cave no matter what (how dare you make me read that with my own eyes) and also THE VAGINA IS A MUSCLE!! IT CAN LOOSEN AND BECOME TIGHT AGAIN!! ✨THE MORE YOU KNOW!! ✨ but also no seb will NOT be traumatized bc he will NOT be seeing that LMAO😇 in the pregnancy oneshot im writing he doesnt look down there😇 he already almost passes out from seeing clora in pain, so i think looking down there and seeing whats happening would actually knock him out/put him in a coma LMFAOOO (also congrats to your sister🥰🥰i hope her cave isnt too wrecked🥰(ok im sorry 💀💀but also YOU started this🫵)
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mochamadeleines · 4 months ago
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Sweethearts and Sweet Dreams <3
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“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.” (6.4k words)
tags!! - 18+ modern au! Husband! Joel Miller, Wife! Reader, you guys are happy and in love!, mutual obsession if u squint, lots of exposition im so freaking sorry, pervert Joel if u squint, praise kink joel if you squint, dumbification if you squint, written for those with daddy issues lowkeeyyyyy, written with game joel in mind but could be hbo joel no problem!, lowk i combined the two in my mind, mentions of shy old man joel, housewife! reader (by choice), unspecified age gap but reader is like. thirty? and joels Like...55??, talk about joel taking medication for his anxiety, p in v sex, dirty talk, public sex, outdoor sex, joel has a kink for dresses because i said so? service top joel if you squint, pet names, a pinch of jealousy and possessiveness for fun, playful banter, mentions of maria and tommy and their baby with a made up name Lol, mentions of ellie and sarah (rip), mentions of readers past abusive relationships, talk about joel struggling with substance abuse/addiction and being hospitalized.....Im sure u can theorize why </3, lots of lore ill get into in another fic MAYBE *smirks*, flip flop in perspective, sometimes showing what joel is thinking or what reader is thinking blah blah
authors notes!! - hi there!!! im mocha and this is my first joel fic ever + my first fic posted to tumblr!! im really nervous cuz i havent written anything in months and ive never written joel before so please let me know if you like it!! id love to write more of this au for u guys if theres a demand for it...Thank u for reading!! also barely proof read im ngl. ive been staring at this fic all day im sick of itttt. p.s i dont usually write smut i also kinda do idfk Is this bad or am i tweaking
You step out of the house, morning sun soaking into the roots of your hair and the driveway beneath your feet. Theres a package youve been waiting for. 
You cant contain your grin as you wiggle it out of the hot prison that is your mailbox.
“What the hell are you doin’ out there barefoot?” Joel chastises you from the front door, leaning his elbow on the frame. Joel, your lovely husband of two years. Been together for five. And because of how hard he works, you have the privilege of being a stay at home wife. Some people think that sort of life is stifling, but youve never felt so free. No more jobs you hate, no more financial struggles. Just you, Joel, and your cat, Cement. He likes to pretend it isnt a totally hilarious name for a pet.
You were his first relationship in almost a decade, so it was a lot of work helping him unpack his anxieties about dating, and a lot of work for you to feel safe and unafraid. Honestly? Youve been mistreated by enough men to land you in the psychward.
But Joel never yells at you, he never breaks things when hes angry or threatens to hurt you. He might raise his voice every now and again, but its never because of something you did. Sometimes the stress of life is just too much. 
He works hard, he loves his daughter- daughters- and he would do anything to keep you happy. Whatever you say goes, he says. Even now, you hardly argue. Of course you have disagreements, or off days thatd lead to one of you being especially moody, but the both of you do your best to communicate.
Behind that rough exterior, is someone who just wants to be needed. 
You first met Joel at a youth center you volunteered at, he taught guitar, you taught arts and crafts. Joel says it was your smile and sense of humor that charmed him. It was his singing and southern accent for you.
Your favorite thing about Joel is how soft he gets around you. He says its because you make it easy to be soft. 
Joel was a shy lover at first. He would get nervous just kissing you, or holding your hand. While most people become intimate very early on in their relationship, you and Joel didnt do anything sexual for the first five months of you dated. Sure, you almost did, plenty of times, but he would get so overwhelmed and cut things short. You broke two of your vibrators during this era of your relationship. Embarassing.
You remember your first time very vividly. Joel had worked back to back doubles trying to meet a deadline, and on the final day, after having barely spoken to you for almost a week, you had shown up to his house, unannounced. You were wringing water out of your jacket when he swung the door open. 
“How-” Joel blinks a few times, stepping forward to examine the rainfall. “How long you been out here?”
“Not that long,” You lie and pick up the container you brought off the porch chair. Part of you had a hard time mustering up the courage to even knock on the door. Droplets of water cascade down your chin. “Hi, sorry. I know youre tired.”
He shakes his head, voice soft and warm. “S’fine. Now c’mon, youre gonna get sick.”
Youre seated at the little dining table next to the kitchen now, trying to let the sound of the rainfall ease your nerves.
Joel was quick to grab you a towel, and does the honors of drying your face and hair with it. “Why didnt you jus’ call me? Woulda gotten out of the shower faster if i knew you were gettin’ soaked out there like this.”
“I dunno, sorry.”
“An’ whatd i tell you about apologizin’ all the time?”
“Sor- Uh. Right. Okay.” You tighten your jaw. No more.
Joel moves behind you, now squeezing water out the ends of your hair. “Whas’ that?”
“Oh!-” You peel back the lid, showing it to him. “Old fashion cake donuts are your favorite right? I remember you saying you liked eating them with your coffee in the mornings so…I made these. Youve been working a lot lately and I wanted to do something nice for you.”
Joel gingerly grasps the container from your hands, looking into it. Theyre a warm golden brown, outside evenly fried, and the sweet scent of them hits his nose right away.
“I was just gonna leave them on the doorstep and call you to tell you they were there, but I wanted to see you.”
His adam's apple bobs as he swallows the dryness in his throat. Youre too good for him. 
“Thank you very much.” He presses a kiss to your damp hair. “Now, lets get you into some dry clothes.”
Joel gives you a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to keep you modest while your clothes wash and dry. 
You wait patiently on his bed for the hot chocolate he promised you before you showered. Theres nothing to watch on the tv, so you just turn it off and reach for the lamp on his nightstand instead. 
He comes in quietly, and sets the mug down beside the lamp. You finally come into focus, clear as day even under the low lighting.
“You uh.. You look nice.”
You blink. “I look nice?”
“In my shirt.”
That gets a smile out of you. 
Joel tips his head towards the mug. “S’hot so, give it a few minutes. Dont want you burnin’ your mouth.”
You nod. “Okay.”
Hes sat beside you now and the two of you sit in silence for a while. Its not awkward, just the kind of silence where both of you want to say something but just.. Cant.
Joel unravels first. “Missed you, y’know. Just been tired.”
“I know.” Your voice wobbles, and Joels jaw tightens like hearing you sound so sad stings him. “I missed you, too.” 
He slides his hand over yours, giving it a squeeze. Its okay. 
“Hey Joel...Can I stay the night?” 
“Sure. Id really like that.”
While you drink your hot chocolate, you and Joel catch up. You both talk about work, and about your new found interest in baking. Joel teases you about your lack of cooking skills, you do the same. Youre both useless. 
When its time to climb into bed, neither of you can actually fall asleep. Joel rolls onto his side, away from you and the window. You follow, curling up like a little cat against his back. The sensation is nice for the both of you.
You speak up after a little while.
“Joel?”
“Mm.”
“Thank you for letting me stay.”
He scoffs, voice thick with exhaustion. “Like I'd force you to leave after you brought me such a nice present.”
You let out a little giggle, “So if i didnt, youd kick me out?”
“Id think ‘bout it.”
You gasp, gently shoving at his back. “Thats mean…!”
“S’really not.”
“Oh yeah? And what if I poisoned them?.”
“Then itd jus' be a regular day of your cookin’ then.” Joel reminds you, lighthearted. Too many times where you left the shells in your eggs or burnt toast or left the bacon on the pan for too long.
“You cant get mad at me for my dark past when you made a perfectly good sirloin taste like horse leather.”
“Ugh. Dont remind me. That was like putting a one-hundred dollar bill into a paper shredder. How do either of us stay alive again?”
“Uh. Digiorno?”
“Digiorno.”
After a few moments, Joels rolling over again, and hes guiding your head to settle against his chest. Your arms wrap around him, and his arms around you. 
“Joel,” You whisper. He hums. “Im cold.”
“S’cause youre not wearin’ any pants.”
“And whos fault is that?”
“Still yours.”
“I was left out in the rain like a sad, sopping wet cat. One that was left in a box all alone with no family…” You pretend to sniffle. “Dont you feel bad for me?”
Joel sighs, not saying anything more except making sure the part of the comforter behind your back is tucked into your side so the cold air doesnt get in. When hes done, you do a little shimmy up his body, and throw your leg over his hip. Oh no.
Hes alert now. Very alert. Be normal. Joel hesitates, licking the dryness off his lips. “Uh. Feel better?”
“Mhm.” You push your face into his throat, cat-like, before settling down again. Hes like a radiator.
Actually scratch that, he cant be normal. 
“Darlin’.” He rasps, patting your back to get your attention.
“Mm?”
“Your leg. Move it.”
A few beats pass. “Why?”
“Because…” Wow,  he didnt think hed get this far. You shift forward and Joel lets out a quiet exhale through his nose, one that couldve been masked by the rain if you werent so close.
“Are you-”
“No! No. Its- Its not what you think-” He cant see your face in the darkness but he knows you feel the semi-hard struggling through the confines of his pants. Lame.
“Joel,” You say, soft. Your hands slide up his arm to cradle his jaw. Lightning flashes into the room, giving you a glimpse of Joels tight expression. He whispers your name back, just as soft.
“This is normal.” 
Its normal, it is! Except for the fact that you guys havent had sex yet. The stress of being intimate is too much, kills his boner in a blink. The longer he waits the worse the anxiety gets.
“I-I know.”
You place a hand on his chest, feeling it pound away like crazy through all the soft muscle.  
“Youve been taking your medication, right?”
Has he?
The silence of him thinking is proof enough. “Joel-”
He sighs, rubbing his eyes through the darkness .“I know, I know. Shoot, Im sorry. I just forget sometimes.”
“Its okay.” The pad of your thumb strokes the tops of his cheek, and you press a tender kiss to his mouth to soothe him.  “...Want me to remind you?”
The softness of your lips has him a bit dazed. “Huh?”
“I said, do you want me to remind you? I can- You know, call you before you leave work. Make sure you take them.”
“You know I wake up at five-o-clock in the mornin’ , right?”
“I know.” 
In a whisper, “Okay.”
Joels rough palms trail down your back and stop at the curve of your butt, finger tips delicately tracing the skin above your shorts. You shiver.
Barely above a whisper. “We dont have to go all the way.”
He says your name again, laced with worry. He doesnt want you to feel pressured. 
You pull your leg off his hip and push yourself up, settling your hands on either side of Joels head.
“Can I tell you something?”
“Yes-”
“-And you cant get all in your head about it. You stay here, with me. You stay present.”
“Okay, okay.” He nods, a bit defeated. “I will stay present.”
“When you...When you say you dont wanna have sex, what is it that youre thinking exactly? I know you said you just get really nervous but I feel like youre not being totally honest.”
Joel stays quiet, idly rubbing your sides. Maybe you are a cat. Just getting to feel any part of you is soothing. “I jus’ want you to feel good. ‘Fraid ill do somethin’ you dont like.”
“You cant assume how I feel, Joel. Being intimate.. It takes time to learn what the other person likes.”
He sighs. “I know.” Youre always right.
Adding on, “Like I said, we dont have to go all the way,” You lean further back, situating yourself on his hips. He lets out a shaky breath when he feels the pressure of your ass through his sweats.
“But, I want to start somewhere. I want to feel you.” 
“Fuck- Um-” Hes shaking now, letting you grind your hips down onto him. Joel cant seem to control the way his hips instinctively push up to meet yours. Youre both becoming of a mess of little gasps and hot breaths and tiny whimpers already.
You hunch forward, guiding his hand under your your shirt- His shirt- letting him feel up the supple skin of your stomach, then the area where your ribs are, then your-
“And I want you to feel me,”
Surprisingly, you did actually go all the way that night.
Your sex life was a bit of a rocky start, but after Joel got over most of his anxiety, you learned quickly just how goddamn insatiable he was. Five years in and he still regularly makes you sore. 
There are a couple things you learned about him and his sexual interests. He loves to take you in his truck, in your kitchen, in your bathroom, on your couch. Other, riskier places. Anywhere that isnt your bed apparently, not that he isnt fucking you there either.
Joel is handsy, so handsy infact it embarasses you to no end, especially when youre infront of others. Thats usually how it starts, too. First he kisses you, then gropes your hips and your ass, and the next thing you know, youre cumming on his fingers. Then hed bend you over, or get you on your back, or make you ride him. Is it really riding if hes just slamming up into you until your brain turns into mush?
He likes that too. Making you not think.
Youd be lying if you said its only ever him. Sleepy morning handjobs before work, whining to him over the phone and touching yourself to his voice, arching your back into him while you're washing dishes, sucking him off after hours in his office.
And while most men prefer lingerie or little costumes, Joel likes dresses. Dresses that are discreet so he can take you in the backyard when he comes home early and sees you gardening. Or when youre both at a friends house and hes had a little too much to drink and finds himself alone with you. Dresses that make it easy to play his favorite game with you. I touch you, and you make sure we dont get caught by being too loud. Joel really is the worst sometimes.
Now, you only ever wear pants when its cold, or to bed or sometimes when youre lounging, like today. Youre in some shorts and a tank top. Otherwise, its dresses all year round, usually retro styles or ones meant for spring. Joels not picky though, he loves any dress on you.
Even if you wear an extremely modest, white lacey sleep dress, looking like some kind of vintage ghost, the man would still keep you up all night. And he has. He said you looked like a princess. You guess you kind of did.
The entire thing is like an unspoken arrangement between you both. He doesnt tell you to wear them, you just do.
And he works hard to spoil you, so why not buy as many cute dresses as possible? 
You got a cute dress today too, on the same day Joel has off. You think its going to be a new favorite of his.
The big polymailer stays hidden behind your back. Be casual. “Uh- Nothing!”
“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.”
“Lemme see then. Show me your hands-”
“Hey, Mrs. Miller!”
Both you and Joel turn your heads to the voice, and only one of you has the energy to fake a a smile. Your neighbor is stopping in his driveway, having come back from a jog it looks.
“Hi, Lee.” 
Joel really, really, really doesnt like Lee. You dont like him either, but youre not one to cause problems. Lee on the other hand, is. Hes a bit younger than you, and a lot younger than Joel. Hes one of those tech dudes with a massive ego, thinks that youll be swayed by his money and his “charm” and youth as if youre some sad housewife in need of saving. Gross. 
And another thing, Lee doesnt even actually live here! Hes here ever so often to visit his dad between, you dont know, tech expos? You forget. Joel believes he started showing up more often to see you. 
Youre walking towards the porch again. Joels looking especially unhappy to see him today, knuckles pulled taut into a fist. His lips stay pressed into a thin line, careful not to let anything slip out. He usually lets you do most of the talking, as much as it pains him. 
Joels really not a fan of the way Lees eyes take a trip up your bare legs. Little shit.
“Out with no shoes again, Mrs. Miller?”
“You know me, Im uh- Im weird.”
“The weird ones do it best.” He smiles, all teeth. It gives you the creeps. His attention is on Joel now. Its like watching a puppy try to one up a wolf. “Right, Joel?”
“Uh huh.” Whatever that means.
“Actually, I've been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Miller.” Lee crosses into your driveway and you glance briefly at Joel, as if to make sure he isnt going to start growling at the other to stay away. Youre clutching the package to your chest now. 
“Have you ever been to a support group for uh- you know, the spouses of addicts?  I have a friend from work and shes really struggling.” 
Lees tone is sugary sweet, but the fake kind you put in diet soda except that stuff is way better. Joel sighs from the door. You stand there, dumbfounded on the porch steps because what the fuck is he going on about. 
You clear your throat, keeping your voice firm. “No. Ive never needed to.”  
Joels voice cuts in like a knife. “Been clean for almost twenty years now.”
“Yeah but, you know,” He shrugs, squinting a bit under the morning sun. “Relapses happen.”
Joel and Lee are at a stand still, and the moment Joel lets the arm leaning on the frame drop to his side, you know youre in for a lot of trouble. You move quickly towards the door. “We have to get ready for a- uh- a thing? but Im sorry about your friend.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Miller. Im doing my best to support her.” And before he turns away, he just has to be slimy to you. “If you need someone to talk to, Im here for you.”
“No, that really wont be necess-”
Joels slinging a strong arm around you to yank you back inside before shutting the door. 
“Motherfucker,” He hisses to himself, stomping through the walkway and into the kitchen.
“How-” You rub your eyes, letting them adjust to the light inside of the house. You put the package down onto the bar counter that opens up the kitchen and follow Joel to the fridge. “How does he know?? I thought-”
“Been living in this house for decades now,” His expression is tight, brows knitted together while he chugs a bottle of water. “People talk. ‘Specially if I'm being rolled into an ambulance on more than one occasion.” Joel frowns. “Fuck- I shoulda punched him in the fuckin’ face- Do you see how hard he tries so hard to flirt with you infront’a me?”
“I know, love. I was there.” You take the bottle from his hand and set it to the side, then wrap your arms around him. “Try not to let it get to you okay?”
Joel sighs into your hair, giving your body a squeeze. “I know, I know, but jus’ hearin’ him tryin’ta use my baggage to make a pass at you…S’fuckin’ evil.”
“I agree, but I dont want his blood on the driveway.”
“So get it on his driveway instead, got it.”
You giggle and tip your head up to kiss him. The tension eases from Joels shoulders, and he cups your cheeks, letting his worries melt away into your mouth. When the pads of his fingers start to slide under your tank top, youre leaning back. Youll be here for a while if this goes any further.
Joel mindlessly chases your lips, looking a bit pouty now that its over.
“Im gonna start getting ready for the barbecue, okay?”
“This early?”
“I like being punctual.” 
“My brother wont give a damn if were late.” He noses your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there. Your knees are beginning to feel weak. The bastard is trying to distract you.
“But I do. The farmers market opened today, and I promised Maria I'd get her fresh strawberries before we got there, remember?”
“Alright, alright.�� He grumbles into your shoulder.
Joel lets you go, watching you round the bar counter to get your package and disappear upstairs.
-
Ever since you came down to a freshly showered Joel, and got into the car with the gift bags you prepared for Maria and Tommy, Hes been staring at you. One wrong move and the drools gonna start pouring out of his mouth.
Your hair is in its relatively natural state, freshly washed and shiny from the oil you put in it. You put on some light makeup, and went a bit heavy handed on the blush to look sunkissed, and topped it off with a flavored lip gloss Joel especially enjoys. 
Now, the dress. Its a pink floral mid-length dress, with a low cut sweetheart neckline and a corset style backing to cinch your waist and push out your chest. The material is thick and pretty, and there are two other layers under the skirt to keep its shape. You have on a pair of little pink pumps with little bows to match. 
The drive to the farmers market is fairly peaceful, the windows are half down and theres music playing at low volume on the radio. You and Joel have different tastes in music, but one genre you can always agree on is alternative rock. 
The weathers beautiful, sun high in the sky, and its not too hot or humid. The day really is perfect. Youre gonna soak up some sun when youre at the barbecue. Hopefully, they made lemonade again too.
Joel has been mostly quiet throughout your shopping. While it would worry some, youve been with him long enough to know that he just has a lot on his mind. What hes thinking about? Maybe youll learn when you make it back home at the end of the day.
You gasp, strolling through the grass to a stand with a mountain of apples. Granny smith, Macintosh, Pink Ladys, Honeycrisp, the works. He grunts, trying to keep the things that are already in your basket steady. You came for strawberries and are going to leave with much more than that.
Joel nudges you softly. “Remember, this is quality stuff, meaning itll go bad faster. Dont get too much.”
“Okay, got it.” You beam, and then begin inspecting the Pink Lady apples first, trying to find the ones with the best color.  He keeps the basket within reach so you can drop your picks in.
"These were Sarahs favorites."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, it was funny 'cause we started arguin' over these or Red Delicious. I think Red Delicious is better."
"Thats so cute! Hmm. Should we get one for her? A Pink Lady?"
"Uh," He thinks on it for a moment, unsure, but the smile on your face helps him make a decision. "Sure, why not."
You drop two perfect Pink Ladys into the basket, moving onto the next pile.
“Hey, Joel.” You grin, holding out a wrinkled granny smith apple. “This one looks like you”
“Ha ha.” He deadpans, and grabs it from you to put back. In turn, hes reaching for the runt of the pile. A pathetically small one sitting near the bottom. “Now this one looks like you.”
“Does not!”
“Does too.” 
The next stand has golden kiwis, and youre practically dragging Joel forward to try them. You ask for one, and the man at the stand slices it into halves, giving you a plastic spoon to go with. 
You let Joel smell it first. “S’good.”
“Lets see if it tastes good.”
You sink your spoon into it, humming when you see how soft and easy it is to scoop out. In your mouth it goes!
Its tastes sweet, a bit mango-y and fucking delicious. You bounce in place, spoon feeding Joel next. “Oh yeah,” He smiles, smacking his lips a bit to really let the taste settle on his tongue. “Were takin’ some of these.”
You take one, then two, then three and four then five and as you reach for the sixth one, Joels stopping you with a gentle hand. 
“Darlin’.” 
“Right.” 
For the next few stands its just you and Joel trying various kinds of fruit. Starfruit, blueberries, some mangos, and then youre going back to the truck.
“I think my favorites were the mangos and golden kiwis. I hope Maria and Tommy have enough space in their fridge for all of this.”
“They moved into a bigger house, I reckon their fridge s’probably bigger, too.”
“What time is it?” 
You let go of Joels arm so he can switch the basket from one hand to the other. 
“‘Bout…” Hes squinting at his watch. “12:34 in the afternoon.”
“Oh! Guess we got the shopping done sooner than I expected. Hmm. Should we stop somewhere in the mean time?-" You snap your finger when you remember something. "They opened up this cafe that has cats in it! We can drink coffee and play with them for bit! The next fourty-five minutes will go by super fast."
“Youre gonna make Cement jealous.”
You bat your hand dismissively. “Hes not gonna caaare.” 
“Oh yes he will. And remind me again why we named our cat Cement?
“Uh, we were both drunk and had gotten him the day before without a name picked out?”
“A whole year later and we still kept it. Worst pet owners ever.” Joel chuckles, opening the passenger door for you like he always does. 
“Thank you.”
“Mhm.”
The giant basket of fruit goes into the back seat next to the gift bags before Joel slots himself into the drivers seat. 
You fumble with the radio a bit, trying to see what else is on but ultimately landing back on your preferred station. Theyve been playing a lot of Linkin Park recently. Hell yeah. Joel buckles himself in at last, and pulls out of the parking lot. 
“Marias gonna teach me how to make baked chicken,” You hum, gazing outside the window.
“You sure youre not jus’ unteachable?”
“Ha ha,” You lightly shove his shoulder, making him smile. “I thought you loved the meat sauce pasta I learned how to make.”
He settles into his seat more comfortably at the stop light, elbow rested on the window. “Got me with that one. Think I like ground turkey over beef, though.”
“Yeah? Me too. The beef tastes better but the turkey is lighter. Stops me from feeling all sick.”
“Agreed.”
Youre looking out the windshield now. Where did all the buildings go? Youre out of the city. 
“Uh, Joel?”
“Mm?”
“Where are we going?”
“Somewhere to kill time.”
“Yeah but where?”
“Youll see.” 
Your brows pinch together. “I see a whole lot of nothing except for trees."
“Almost there.”
Joel makes a hasty left turn onto some campgrounds. Your stomach starts to twist into excited knots. Is he gonna show you a baby deer or something? Bunnies? He used to be a park ranger for this area, and would tell you stories about all sorts of baby animals hed run into.
The car comes to a stop, and he turns the engine off. Silence.
“So…Were out in the woods to kill time?”
“Mhm.” Joel unbuckles his seat belt and twists into the back to grab the spare jacket he usually keeps there, then gets out of the truck and comes around the back to open the door for you. 
He holds your hand to help you get down from the passenger side, and as soon as both of your shoes hit the ground Joel is on you. 
You dont know where your hands should go, youve kissed Joel a thousand times and yet you still get so flustered when he catches you by surprise. You keep your hands on his shoulders for now, letting him press wet kisses to your neck and shoulder.
“This is new right? The dress?” He gives your ass an appreciative squeeze through the fabric. “Thought you looked so pretty when you came down stairs in it.” 
Your heads spinning. Something about your dress? 
“Woulda been okay if you let me have you earlier.” He pulls away, examining your flushed face cradled by his hand. Every part of you just fits so well in his palms. “Then I thought, why not have you now? We got time to spare.”
“Joel- We- Someone could see us-” You sputter, and Joels already shaking his head with a knowing smirk. He pulls you around to the bed of the truck, popping it open, only pausing to spread open the jacket he grabbed, just having just thrown it in there when he came around to get you.
“No ones gonna come lookin’ for us.” He turns you around, pushing you down onto your front. “As long as youre quiet.” 
Fuck. You really hate this game. At least, you like to tell yourself that.
Blood rushes to your ears while Joels rough palms lift up the skirt of your dress, exposing your ass and thighs to the cool air. He whistles from behind you. 
“Red lace panties?” His fingers dont shy away from tracing along the fabric covering your cunt. “This new too?”
You crane your neck over your shoulder to look at his face. “Uh.. Surprise?”
Joels smiling now, fingers dipping under the lace. “Thas' awfully sweet of you.”
His touch slips and slides around your growing wetness, then trails down to your clit. Your voice wobbles a bit and fuck- fuck hes going too fast. “Joel- Ah-” You whimper and try to push yourself up to look at him but his hand is steady on your spine, keeping you down. 
Smug, “Go on, sweetheart. Keep sayin’ my name. Jus’ like that.”
A whine escapes you when he pulls away, “Nooo.” You push your ass back, as if to entice him. You succeed, because hes skipped his usual routine of fucking you with his hands and is now unbuckling his belt.
Joel rolls you onto your back, and peels your underwear all the way off, bunching it up and shoving it into his back pocket. Your face burns just watching him.
“Think i'll hold onto these for a lil’ while.”
His hands push the back of your knees towards your chest, exposing your heat. Youll never get used to the way he just seems so interested just watching your cunt squeeze around nothing. 
“Thats-” You swallow, pushing yourself up onto your elbows. "Joel.”
“Relax." He coos, "Seen it a thousand times already, and ill be seein' it a thousand more. Get used to it, honey.”
Your attention flickers down to where his dick is about to meet your entrance. Joels nudging you down onto your back again and pulling the top of your dress down to expose your chest. Its when youre distracted that he actually moves to push himself in.
Both of you groan together, and Joel could never get bored of fucking you, not when your cunt just pulses around him everytime hes inside you.
Joel wastes no time fucking you once he eases all the way inside. Youre trying your best to keep quiet. Shit is no easy task. Its like Joel is trying to get you guys arrested.
He props himself up with a hand near your head, and lets the other keep one of your legs pinned open. The moans start to claw out of your throat. “Joel- Joel-” 
“Shh. Thas’ enough.” He growls through his teeth, fucking you harder. “Youre gonna- Gh- Get us caught-”
Something rustles between the trees, making you both freeze. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching Joel straighten up to look around.
After a few seconds of squinting, Joel can see a few foxes moving about through the trees. Thank fuck. His shoulders visibly relax.
Hushed, “E-Everything okay?”
“Yeah, jus’ some animals.” 
And like that, hes back to it. His dick is going to make your eyes permanently stay rolled into your head. 
Joel is always just so handsome when hes pounding into you. His forehead gets shiny with sweat, and his jaw is tight from clenching his teeth, keeping himself quiet so he can focus on your moans. His face is noticeably redder against his usual farmers tan too. Really, hes just so attractive.
A flurry of yes and harder and fuck spills out of your mouth and into your palms. Not too loud, you try to remind yourself.
“Joel- S’too much-”
“Nah, thas’ not it.” He huffs, humorous. “You can take it. Y'always do. In fact, you love gettin’ your cunt bullied by me, aint that right?” As if to get his point across, he thrust in all the way to the hilt, making you keen. You forgot how to breathe, lungs drawing tight in your chest.
"Fuck," You manage to squeeze out.
Your palms push weakly at his shoulders, trying to ground yourself somehow. His head drops to the junction of your neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply.
“You good?” He checks in, breath hot on your skin. As if your crying isnt enough.
“So g-good, Joel- Fuck- Youre so good.” 
With a little nod, Joels pushing himself up, switching to slow and deep strokes, really digging himself into you, and trying to find that spot he likes to call home.
He massages your chest, then squeezes your sides and your hips and finally, his thumb finds your clit. Immediately, you jolt. 
“Oh fuck-” 
“Quiet.” And he says it to keep the charade going, even though his favorite thing is hearing your sobs.
His thumb rubbing incessantly against your that sweet little nub of yours. You choke, and Joels chuckling, watching the way you squirm, body not knowing whether it should lean into his touch because its too good or away because its too much.
It starts with this firey feeling under the pad of his thumb, then deep inside your stuffed cunt. Youre going to cum. 
Your hands fly to your mouth again, and you get all wide eyed from the sensation. Its cute. Your muscles pull taut, legs locking around Joels hips. Youre wailing into your palm when it happens.
“Good girl,” His voice soothes you through it. “Very good.”
He pets away the fly aways sticking to your sweaty face when its over. Your eyes drop shut while you catch your breath. 
Joels moving again now. He rolls his hips a few times, and thumb is building the foundation of another orgasm in you. Youre shaking badly.
Your words slur too, “Cant- Too soon- Joel- Joel-”
“Another one.” Joel says firmly, but breathless. 
Youre gasping, not sure where to focus your eyes. The trees around you look like theyre spinning. Your attention is back on Joel, whos looking rather satisfied watching you squirm and cry. If thats how wants to play, then fine.
Your hands slide up Joels biceps, and rests on the nap of his neck to bring him down. “Juh-Joel,” You pant, cradling his face with both hands. “Youre so good- The best-”
Oh, Joel likes that one, you can tell by the way he looks away briefly. Shyness. Excitement runs up your spine. Joel loves being told hes doing well. 
“You are- Nghh-” You swallow the drool in your mouth, trying to get the words out clearly. “The best husband I could ever ask for.”
Joel wheezes, head dropping into the curve of your shoulder. “Please.”
“S’true,” You nod rapidly, fingers curling into his hair. “Youre so good to me and-and youre mine and- Joel-  Im yours.”
“Jesus-” He groans, soaking up the feeling of you pressing kisses to his face and up his jaw. 
“Hhah-  No one else can have me, okay? No one- Not even-”
The name doesnt even come out of your mouth before Joels coming to a stop to slip his arms all the way around your middle. With the new leverage he has on your body, hes drilling his way into you. You fucking squeal, rules now long forgotten. Youre a useless ragdoll in his arms and he wouldnt have it any other way.
Your lips are shiny with spit and left over lip gloss, and he can still taste the mintiness in his tongue. Every now and again your eyes drop shut, but his dick just punches into your guts a little harder. Look at me. 
Your brain is mush, just the way he likes it, and youre perfectly pliant in his arms, babbling over how good you feel. Hes kisses along the valley of your breasts now, stopping to suck the flesh of your nipples.
Youre just so pretty. Even when you have bedhead, or youre snotty from a cold, or youre all dirty from working in the garden  youre still so pretty. Including now, all sweaty with you lipgloss all smudged and your mascara starting to run. Youre perfect. 
Joel grunts loud, jaw clenched tight as he gets lost in the feeling of your insides. His perfect little wife.
When he cums, hes doubling over with a loud grunt, getting a few last thrusts in before his spent floods your cunt.
Youre blinking away your tears, now watching the clouds inch along the sky. It really is a beautiful day. You pet Joels sweaty hair, and kiss the side of his temple. Your core throbs faintly. Jesus, he did a number on you.
“Love,” You say softly, patting his back.
“Mm?”
“Get up.” Another pat. “Youre squishing me.” 
Joel backs off to buckle himself up, but you stay seated to catch your breath and adjust your dress. At least it didnt get ripped during all the… Commotion. Not like last time.
“I need my underwear back.”
“Nope,”
“Joel.”
He kisses the center of your forehead and helps you down from the bed and into the passenger seat instead.  “Told you i'm keepin’ ‘em.”
You sputter, “I cant go to barbecue commando!”
“Sure you can.” He pops open the glove compartment and gets out some tissues, hand snaking under your dress again to clean you. You sigh softly at the sensation.
“Youre the worst.”
“I am indeed the worst.” Joel pulls the seatbelt over your chest and clicks it in. “You can tell me all about it on the way to Tommys.” 
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