#that's my vent for this friday evening | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

astronautmike-dexter · 4 months ago

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#rant time here where i can get shit out in a hidden tucked away place #but qhy the fuck are families so difficult #like #i thought i had such a normal family growing up until i was about 14 #and every year it gets worse #parents are so mentally unwell that it literally causes damage to us kids #older brother is checked out to focus on his own family and kids #but then still butts in when he thinks he needs to play the man of the family #only to make matters worse #younger sister is having to put up with it all bc she's still in my hometown #everyone is racist to her boyfriend even tho they've been together for 6-7 years and he's literally made her such a better person #it's fucked #and then they all come running to me to vent and/or solve things bc I live somewhere else #idk man #it's just cooked #and like #i had a breakdown to kris tbe other day when this latest shit with my family and sister's bf popped up #bc why the fuck should i bring a kid into this shitshow of a family #why not just end the bullshit here #anyway #that's my vent for this friday evening #all this just in time for me to go home for a few days and confront my dad and brother for IMPLYING MY SISTER'S BF IS VERBALLY ABUSIVE #EVEN THO THEY NEVER SEE HIM BC HE FEELS SO UNCOMFORTABLE AROUND THEM #uugghhhghhhhhhhhgh

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ch2n2o2x3 · 24 days ago

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₊‧° 𝓣𝓸𝓭𝓪𝔂, 𝓘 𝓪𝓶 𝓖♡𝓭 °‧₊

𝒯𝑜𝓂𝑜𝓇𝓇𝑜𝓌… 𝓌𝒽𝑜 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌𝓈?

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gammaraydeath · 1 month ago

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does anybody have any experience with taking medication for mood and/or personality disorders that they'd be willing to talk with me about? it's not something i enjoy the thought of but i've been thinking it might be necessary for me. i'm curious about the cost/benefit wrt side effects. extremely random post for a mass effect blog sorry

#reached out to get the contact information for a psych today but it's friday evening so.#gotta wait till monday to learn more about that #i'm tired of being miserable and dragging everyone i love down with me. i will literally do anything to get better #i only get 2 more therapy appointments thru uni so i need to figure this out for the long term #mini vent in tags lol whatever it's my personal blog. if i wanna talk about my struggling i can

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smolldust · 3 months ago

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despite managing to get a B on my ap English test today, I’m definitely gonna fail my math test on friday

#I didn’t even KNOW the test was Friday until today!!!!#She never said anything!!!!!!#And it wasn’t on the online calendar!!!!!#Killing myself #i fucking hate math with a burning passion #Making my gay ass do math should be a hate crime /j #smolldust #smolldust rambles #Sighs #rant #kinda #idk #vent #maybe?

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blushy-tigerrr · 4 months ago

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vent in tags sorry

cw: mention of loss

#adding a long note to the beginning so no one sees the actual vent in the case that they don’t want to which is absolutely okay #okay that’s probably good #i feel like a failure today.#my car wouldn’t start on friday and i haven’t had a moment to actually call a mechanic until today #called early in the morning and he said he’d call me back with a time #i’ve reached out multiple times since then and have heard NOTHING #if i don’t get it fixed today i’ll have to take my partners car instead #and when i asked them if that would possibly be okay #they started off on a rant about how they were planning to do all this shit tomorrow morning and now can’t if they don’t have their car #but genuinely. how tf was i supposed to know about their plans?? why did they have to say it all like this is completely my fault???#i’m sorry that i’m still in a not so good mental place right now and might forget to do things in a more timely manner #i’ve had two grandparents pass away in the span of a few WEEKS. give me a little grace.#i give them the same understanding every day when they’re having a rough time #so why can’t they offer me the same thing?#i know they’re just stressed and tired and busy but FUCK SO AM I #i’m just. over it. i want to go to sleep.#and by sleep i mean literal sleep i’m not insinuating anything darker i promise #i may be in a rough spot mentally but it is not that kind of rough <3 i’m safe #just. very tired. and in need of support.#i feel like i’m always giving and rarely getting support in this relationship.#and now i’m just feeling like a burden and an inconvenience for even needing the extra support in the first place #the urge to run away and start my life over is strong holy shit

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fadeintoyou1993 · 4 months ago

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having to explain to people things like. if i have to go out to do something and run errands i need to have it all mapped out and planned w like. at least a week in advance. and if i go out that day i cannot do anything else because That will be it. if i have multiple commitments that cannot be put on the same day i need one full day in between those commitments so i can rest and be recharged for that next thing otherwise i might have a breakdown in the middle of the street (again) and then That will render me unable to function for like a whole three days. and then people look at me like i choose to live like this?

#txt #audhd tag #just venting a little #its crazy because ppl around me are like I understand your limitations However why dont you-#So you dont understand my limitations?#like okay yeah i understand that it must be Weird for people that are not Inside my brain and hard to understand that i PHYSICALLY CANNOT>#do things that they dont even think about. alright! but to sit and tell me Yeah we get it! but then try to either fix it or >#> come up w a New Incredible Way To Fix Me as if half of what i talk abt w my therapist isnt Exactly This #like yeah i dont fucking like it either. i wish i could do shit like other ppl do. i wish i could remember things.#i wish i didnt feel exhausted all the time i wish simply leaving my bed wasnt the most difficult task every single morning #but it pisses me OFF when people try to talk me through these Limitations i have that They Understand<3 like. can you be accommodating or no #one of my closest friends and oldest friends since i was like 5 had her bday on friday and she ljterally messaged me like #Hi we r having something w my family but theyre rly loud and extremist on the right wing side and i barely wanna be here u dont have 2 come>#> but i wanted to invite u anyway so u dont think ur being left out! and i was like Yayy nice thank u bc lbr i probably wouldnt go anyway.#and she KNOWS that. and she literally was talking to me like she alwahs does and That felt accommodating and understanding and i felt loved #cut to my mom last night trying to make me feel guilty for not going because Shes my friend and i should have gone anyway.#i told her off and she backtracked but thats still innmy head like. that shit is so irritating #okay sorry vent over im just aboht to get my period so this is making me sick #want to yell into the void and forget about it. Hits post

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melrosing · 1 year ago

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anyway in an absolutely wild turn of events I think I’m free of my hideous job and like. substantially richer for it??? lmao 2023 you really owed me

#ok so this a lot of personal shit but I’m just gonna incredulously vent into the tags #like I don’t even know how to describe what 2023 in this job has been like lol #since April they’ve been insulting and scrutinising and scapegoating me over absolutely everything #they were really angling for just firing me outright for never measuring up to their constantly shifting and increasingly bizarre goalposts #and it got so personal man they kept insisting that it wasn’t but my god #then my dad gets sick and it suddenly becomes awkward for them to keep insulting and overworking me #so they switch to just ignoring me entirely so they don’t have to reckon w what me and my family are going through #like they never ask how he is or how things are going just every Friday they say hey do you reckon you can take more work on again?#and THEN I get a gut infection and suddenly im being guilt tripped for taking sick leave and pestered for evidence #it was giving like ‘we had to give you time off for your dad but now you’re taking the piss’#to the point I DID reach out to a third party at the company and was like ‘I’m sorry but why the fuck are they treating me like this’#and she was like ‘confidentially this is disgusting and I advise you to report it’#WHEN SUDDENLY I get back from sick leave and it’s like ‘the business is falling short so we have to make some redundancies….’#and now they’ve had to pay me a SUBSTANTIAL sum to fuck off!!! I think I win???#like I was so close to quitting but thank god I didn’t because now I’m getting a sweet deal to fuck off with no notice lmao #i leave end of the month #at first I was shocked like y’all really doing this now??? but suddenly I’m like. this is the best possible thing that could’ve happened #I spoke to that third party again and she was like ‘I am so happy for you’ like omfg it was a curveball but we’ll take it!!!#I’m fucking outta here and in due course I WILL be writing on glassdoor how fucked they are

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fridayyy-13th · 3 months ago

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wow. not even a week into college and i'm already behind on work. fucking lovely.

#friday chats #friday vs post-secondary school #tw vent #(in the following tags)#i am immeasurably stressed right now #i need to talk to my doctor about getting a booster to go along w/my adhd meds #bc this has been a problem for a while but i think it's about to come to a head #and i'm very scared for when that happens #maybe also talk to my school's disability services #bc Good Fucking God i'm already overwhelmed #it's 11:56. should i just go to bed? i have so many things left to do #when do i even have the time to go to disability services. and i've heard a lot of schools' processes w/that are slow and overcomplicated #fuck. fuck fuck fuckity fuck.#i think i'm spiraling #i'm worried that if i don't get a degree i won't be able to find a nice enough job to support myself independent of my family #and i don't want to be stuck with them forever #i really really don't #maybe i can talk to disability services sometime tomorrow morning. see what they can do #i think there's mental health services too. i hope they're decent #i just feel really bad right now. and it's only week one.#it feels like time's moving too fast but too slow at the same time #classes take forever but my free time zips by and runs out way too quick #and when it's gone i've completed maybe one or two things. out of several. if any at all.#i just don't know what to do. it's only been three days.#maybe i can drop a class; i think i'm taking enough to still be considered a full-time student with one less thing on my plate #i hope so #fucking damn it #how do people do this??? for multiple years????#and i feel selfish for saying this but i hope if y'all see this post you'll interact with it somehow. even just a like.#i want to know someone hears me

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iliveinprocrasti-nationn · 8 months ago

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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else

#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more #I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s #the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything #that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da #lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how #get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to #and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not #be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much #of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in #bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it #into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it #but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted #any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself #not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha #usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day #because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere #I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s #just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway #this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this #bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school #vent tw #yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely #disability #chronically ill #i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho #i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to #anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse #I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours #I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework

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pink-vulpix · 3 months ago

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#day 4 on bupropion #i need to vent. bc today was mostly decent. cause at least i could control my emotions and not cry at every little thing #but ended just as badly as i was feeling yesterday. i feel rly sad rn #when im productive i feel great but when im trying to relax? i feel like i need to find something productive to do immediately.#its like i need to do everything but i have no desire to do anything #im like. lying in bed at 2 am grieving my hyperfixations hard. been crying for the past 3 hours #bc i just cant sit down and enjoy anything without feeling like im forcing myself. and i already miss feeling things when i play video game #idk if i can do the 4-6 weeks of this before side effects normalize. everyone says it gets better #and even that is making me feel guilty bc it took me this long to get help and i already want to quit on my first week #i have an appointment with my dr on friday but fuck. the last 3 nights have felt like weeks. its so hard falling asleep.#it really doesn't help that this med is making me. stupid. i have about 10 seconds worth of memory before the thought is deleted #literally forgetting what i'm talking about midway through a sentence #but hey. at least my memory is so bad i cant remember what i did today and overthink every action. i guess.#and maybe tmi. but my libido is gone... like completely nonexistent now #some people literally take this shit to help w a low libido!!! but for me it is doing the exact opposite!!! what is wrong with my body #and to top it off i can't drink even a half cup of coffee without panic attacks. i miss iced coffee already :(#cant enjoy shit anymore and my adhd feels 10 times worse than it did before bc i can't sit still to save my life.#anyway im yapping so much but i need to because im feeling so alone #some side affects im getting r common and manageable but some are pretty uncommon and its hard finding anyone who relates...

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jup1tersparx · 16 days ago

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i wanna go home (<- left the house 1 minute ago)

#all my teachers are gonna be mad at me #im already gonna be late bc i missed my train #my mum didnt wake me up when she told me she would #i lost my favourite ring that ive had for years #hhhhhhhhhh #on the plus side:#i thought i forgot my backup bralette for if i want to take my binder off but i DIDNT YAYYY #i had a backup backup!!! 🎉🎉🎉#and i’ve successfully had a nice evening every day for the last week so i dont wanna die anymore #its friday #my outfit is cute #i successfully did all the (insane amount of) work i needed to last night #im on top of all my responsibilities rn #we stay silly. we shall prosper. it will be fine #jupiter talks #vent post #tw sui ideation

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phagodyke · 28 days ago

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they need to make a killing myself I can do every weekend but only on the weekends so I can get up fine on monday and go to work again

#.vent #maybe i should start drinking so i can get blackout drunk every weekend. or fuck around w sedatives or pay someone to just whack me round #the head with a sledgehammer on friday evenings and hopefully ill recover from the concussion by mondays #its not even funny what the fuck is wrong with me that i have to spend all my free time trying not to kill myself i feel so sick #im literally fine at work i guess i just dont know how to have fun or be happy or feel wanted or cared for or loved by other people #but dont have to think about that when im working so its fine 5/7 days which is pretty good. im so lonely i want to throw up #tried to leave the house got ready and everything and then burst into tears for no reason ive spent the past hour trying to talk myself #down from hurting myself and i probably wont in the next few hours but i almost certainly will before the day is up. oh well #man who fucking cares. typing this isnt making me feel any better i dont really know what to do anymore #i have a drs appt in 2 weeks for smth unrelated but maybe ill ask abt antidepressants. theres nothing specific causing this #my brain just doesnt work right.i dont even feel like a person most of the time #well nothing else to say 👍

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d3ad-end-girl · 1 month ago

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WIEIAD 10/16

Gross~ 662 cals

Burnt~ 84 cals

Net~ 578 cals

Steps ~ 5,472

#the stupid vent blog #wieiad #Stopped eating at 11:00am and am doing a 24 hour fast into tomorrow #and i had a test and you could just hear my stomach growling the whole time even tho I'm not feeling any hunger #anyways i think my test went well but i did fumble the bag with my crush this morning so honestly a net zero day #now to study for the midterm Friday. yayyyyyyy me #<700 #<800 #<900 #<1000 #<1200

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daz4i · 1 month ago

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well it's been awhile since i last reached a point of crying from pain - less from the actual pain itself and more the frustration over it not going away - but it's nice to see that things always reach the point of me leaning on the wall in the shower half screaming half groaning bc what else do i even have left to do abt this shit.

#took another ibuprofen but it's probably too much but idk what else to do bc i need to go to sleep soon #already took a sleeping pill but i don't think it can work when the pain's filling me with adrenaline and is also very annoying #i hate this sm #this isn't even the same type of pain i used to have #this is a temporary thing for sure #but i can't treat it bc i don't actually have time to go to the doctor tomorrow #and wednesday is a holiday #thursday too. only at friday would i be able to. but the clinic closes super early that day bc sabbath #i was hoping it'll go away by today bc it usually does atp but it didn't. and i'm so mad.#bc realistically speaking i'll have to put up with this until after monday #bc only on monday i'd be able to actually see a doctor. if there's even any available. bc my doctor recently left this clinic too #i hate this sm i truly hate it here (my shitty ass body that should've died and gotten swallowed by nature years ago)#Anyway.#vent #medical //#ask to tag #sorry for all the vent posts lately. as you can see. things are not good

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when-did-this-become-difficult · 11 months ago

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"sorry but i want to hit every american talking about not wanting to vote democrat anymore with hammers. lol" I want to hit you with hammers too, lol. twinsies

like it's not enough that we have to vote democrat we also have to pretend all the time that we looooove it and that it's the greatest thing on earth...shut the FUCK up

i'm a poll worker i'm a canvasser i've voted in almost every election i physically legally could. and i'm here to tell you. i will bitch and whine about the democrats and the democratic party any time i goddamn want and twice on sundays. and AS somebody who has cold called and doorknocked for local dems in a red fucking state, if you think that you can shame people into not mentioning how broken down and furious and desperate the democratic party and democratic politicians makes them feel, and that you will somehow succeed in this, and that will somehow CONTRIBUTE to democratic successes? get a FUCKING grip

#negativity #vent post #that was an exceptionally stupid post for me to have to read on my friday #anyone with a heart and a brain doesn't want to vote democrat anymore jsyk. now i may still do it. but by god if im not caterwauling all th #way...#the patronizing attitude is too much to bear i want to smash #you want to use hammers? I WANT TO USE HAMMERS #I CANT EVEN TELL YOU HOW MUCH TIME AND GENUINE ENERGY AND CUSTOMER SERVICE ATTITUDE I HAVE EXPENDED #TO GET ONE OF YOUR FUCKING PEOPLE IN CONGRESS #ONLY FOR HER TO IGNORE THE SHIT OUT OF ME EVERY TIME I SEND A LETTER #ONLY FOR HER TO DISRESPECT—OPENLY PUBLICLY DISRESPECT—AND PATRONIZE WOMEN OF COLOR WHO TRY TO ASK HER #NOT TO USE THEIR TAX DOLLARS TO KILL THIER FAMILIES.#YOU WANT TO KILL? I WANT TO KILL.#BUT GUESS WHO'S ACTUALLY DOING THE KILLING RIGHT NOW.#THE GUYS. THAT WE. VOTED FOR.#SO YEAH ITS REASONABLE TO NOT WANT TO VOTE FOR THEM ANYMORE ACTUALLY!!!!!!!!!

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sillyfudgemonkeys · 5 months ago

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Sounds like you've got a right bitch of a co-worker based on those post tags lol

ajfksdljf TT0TT Oh that was like my 3rd version of a post I made. I had to talk myself down and censor myself akljsdflkfa orz

But yes he really is. I cannot stress it enough that everyone hates his guts and he's created such a hostile work environment.

#silly asks #the junpei coworker #silly answers #god i hate him so much #he's not the first jackass i've had to work with but god he is the most recent #i should've called HR last night #i literally told him “do NOT fucking finish that sentence or train of thought”#and then he kept ALLUDING to what he wanted to say and i had to keep telling him to stfu #then he hid in the bathroom for 30 min (which pissed me off mORE because it meant he got a free 30 break and was paid for it)#all while i was left alone to wrangle a circus by myself #he was watching anime fyi...cause I could hear it when I had to go to the back room to get stuff #like we had a store meeting and my boss listed a bunch of stuff that needed to be minded #and like HALF of it was directed at junpei (he didn't look at him but WE ALL KNEW)#my boss even confirmed it when everyone else left #he only confirmed it because as soon as they left I turned to him an was like 'when is that mfer getting fired?????!"#my boss wants to fire him but HIS boss says he can't until they find a replacement #the bar is in hell rn #it's so bad that me and my other coworker made a bingo of shit he likes to pull on shift (HE'S THAT CONSISTENT)#*looks at sched* oh thank god I dont need to see him today or tomorrow-#WAIT NO I HAVE TO WORK WITH HIM THE ENTIRE CLOSE FRIDAY NOOOOO FUCK save tme this is gonan suck #i'm kinda hoping he gets “sick” again I'd rather work alone TT0TT #*inhales* it'll be fine it'lle be fine it'll be fine it'll be fine #zen zen centered i am zen...I'll listen to an audio book or video i'll be ok #i'll just ignore him like i've been doing TT0TT #silly vents #vents #irl bs

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