#that’s what got me over 300
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What do you think has contributed the most to your gain?
this is such a fun question!! trader joe’s, easily 🫣 their hand pies, mini sheet cakes, chocolate chip dunkers, pastry pups, cheesecakes, corndogs, pastas… they have these itty bitty tomatoes too which are soooo good w everything!!! and the plumcots 😍
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I accidentally started only the brave pray for me
#for the longest time I thought I already read this fic#because I got it mixed up with a different fic#and then today I was watching TikTok and I realized this is not what I thought it was#so I pulled it up to read it later and then I got my open tabs mixed up#and now I'm on chapter 4 and I'm very nervous for some reason because I don't really know what it's about#like I know it's semi canon compliant and I know it has a happy ending#but it's extremely long and takes place over the course of like two years#honestly if anyone wants to supply me with a spoiler filled plot synopsis under 300 words I would really appreciate it#the marauders#james potter#regulus black#jegulus#only the brave#starchaser#sunseeker#perry's pontification#plzandspanku wishes this was twitter
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i just wanna say tysm for all the sweet comments, reblogs, likes and new followers. literally have been dealing with some bs from school where i have to file a bias report and contest my grade because my professor is a bitch (tea in the tags). But you all really cheered me up and kept me going over the past few days!!! 🩵🩵
im off from work today for summer fridays! so hope i can write more today.
#•𐦍 𝓀𝒾𝓏𝓏𝒶𝓉тαℓк#for context this lady gave me a 0 out of 300 for participation#for a trip and project i objectively did 80% of the work on#my team helped with what they could but no one knew the work would be so specialized before they joined so i cant really blame them#the old cow is just mad we gave her a bad review on the survey cause she kept being judgmental & prejudice & racist on the trip#imagine constantly comparing india to israel and complaining that you cant take students there like GENOCIDE isnt happening rn#imagine being a yt woman going to a rural indian village and as a “joke” telling the translator to translate “i wanna take your baby home”#imagine also going up to your mexican student and consistently mentioning your mexican housekeeper#imagine telling students when theres hotel reviews of hidden cameras and theft and staff assault against women we needed to “be resilient”#imagine a guy having to say hes never made over $50k bc she called us all spoiled and privileged for not wanting to stay in a slum hotel#this lady is crazy#but i got receipts
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I know it's been a few years since I've run my own dog training business instead of working for someone else for exploitation wages and that previously I was working in the rural south where prices are a bit different in general, but out of curiosity I decided to look at some dog training services in my area in upstate NY today and got hit with sticker shock ngl.
Most places don't post their prices so I could only compare a few (which... I sort of get since they want to avoid competition doing what I'm doing right now lol but as someone who has run a dog training business and had business marketing included in my education it's something I see as an... *interesting* choice, because most clients want to know price up front without having to contact you and wait for a response because they probably already have a budget in mind and just want to be able to quickly see if you fit into it or not, which means not having prices posted will make some potential clients immediately look elsewhere and if you don't even have some sort of price range for services posted somewhere then most of your calls and emails will just be people asking for pricing and a majority of those calls and emails will not lead to services purchased so it ends up wasting a lot of unpaid time on office work BUT THATS AN UNRELATED TOPIC, I DIGRESS) but WOWZA the ones that did have prices posted really made me realize I do NOT live in a low cost of living place anymore.
One of the popular places here that I looked at charges $150+ for ONE training session with one of their APPRENTICE trainers. It's double that price to train with one of their more experienced dog trainers for just one session.
I looked back at some of the trainers I was competing with back in FL and NC to compare as well as the dog training school I went to just to check and see if prices were getting that high in other rural areas, and nope. Most places $300 would still get you at least three - maybe up to six - private lessons spread out over three (or six, or whatever) weeks, which is the pricing range I'm used to seeing dog trainers in the rural south suffer with because of places like Petsmart setting the pricing bar so low.
I'm pretty sure I have more formal dog training education and certification than most of the employees at this place too since even their main "behaviorist" (not a protected title in the USA so anyone can call themselves that) has no certifications listed at all that I can find, so... I guess now that I live here if I ever start training again I'm going to have to rethink my pricing lol even if I don't charge those kinds of prices I clearly still need to bump them up in this area from what I used to charge in order to be competitive with these other training businesses.
#pricing too low compared to competition is a business killer btw#another think i learned in my marketing classes#most people buying dog training are wealthier#not necessarily rich but... not poor#and although id love to offer sliding scale for low income clients if i ever do training on my own again#your normal prices being too low WILL turn away those clients who are higher income#cuz EVEN IF IT'S NOT ACTUALLY TRUE higher class members of our society have a subconscious idea that price often = quality for services#I KNOW I KNOW I did not believe this either straight out of school and underpriced my services still anyway despite being taught that#because it did not make sense to my poor person brain to assume that wealthier people think like that#but i learned very quickly after having a couple of wealthier people literally LAUGH at my pricing#or make weird faces and say “that's it?'#the first dude who laughed at my pricing actually gave me a tip that doubled my price for his services every time i worked for him#and another regular of mine often left me envelopes of cash because she said she felt bad that i was charging so little#and that it actually made her second guess hiring me at first#SO JUST TAKE THE ADVICE AND CHARGE WHAT IS COMPETITIVE IN YOUR AREA AT LEAST INSTEAD OF TRYING TO UNDERCUT COMPETITION#or compete with the big chains DEAR GOD DO NOT TRY TO COMPETE WITH THE BIG TRAINING CHAINS PRICE WISE FOR YOUR OWN MENTAL HEALTH#you will burn yourself out and make yourself hate dog training if you try to compete at their exploitation prices#at the least price around what other people who are NOT working for chains in the area do#and ideally price what you think would make you feel like your time and labor is being adequately compensated#which means enough to afford to live and afford to pay for things like health insurance as an independent contractor#and have enough left over for some QOL stuff and to put some into savings for emergencies or slow periods for your work#a lot of people working with animals ridiculously undercharge and then end up screwing themselves over mentallt and physically#anyway this post and the tags are long enough and i could rant about pricing and fair wages forever so im done now lol#just reeling a little at the idea of charging $300 for a single dog training lesson and that PEOPLE HERE ARE PAYING THAT#THAT PLACE IS POPULAR AND SUCCESSFUL#they do not pay their trainers that much though lmfao they make only like $6 over minimum wage OF COURSE#which I know because I got into this pricing deep dive after seeing multiple of their job listings because they're hiring right now#i hate business owners that do pricing vs employee pay so differently like that they are honest to god EVIL that is exploitation
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had to drop $812 at Midas today for all new tires/a realignment, and then i got home to find wimsey bleeding like a stuck pig from a giant gash across the underside of his neck (not sure if one of the other cats literally went for the throat, or if he just clawed all the fur and skin off), and then i had to work an extra two hours to make up for the Midas jaunt, so today has just been A Day.
picture of the recuperating, grompy patient:
#the only plus of the day is i read half of a new-to-me lucy parker book while waiting for the mechanics to finish#state of the angie b.#i've been SO GOT DAMN CAREFUL with my budget this month. i was $300 under it!!! i only had FOUR DAYS TO GO#and then today happened#so now i'm $500 over budget AGAIN and i'm not allowed to buy/do anything fun or get take-out for TWO MORE months#which is an EXTRA bummer because the oddities expo is july 20th#which means i can't get any new taxidermied friends or bones or nifty art this year. *sad siiiiigh*#also i gotta cut my groceries in half next month. i spent $300 on groceries alone this month. that's untenable.#(and it's not like i was buying fresh fruit and veg or meat or anything. that was just canned soup and pasta and microwave meals)#so july is gonna be a ramen month baaaaybeeee. what fun.#ANYWAY this is enough tag venting. i'm gonna go stab something 800 times (finish a cross-stitch to replace one lost in the mail)#(because YEAH a sampler that someone commissioned from me was lost in the mail and now i gotta make ANOTHER ONE#and then eat the extra cost for the second shipping. lololololol everything is GREAT.)
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cracks my fingers
for the asura ask game: 1, 3, 24 for non-evil Ruju
and 1, 8, 27 for Sylffa!
Just an asura ask game
Thanks so much for the ask!! Time to crack my OWN fingers because that's a whole lotta questions-- I offer you Rat Lore, Deluxe Edition(tm) below the cut for everyone's convenience.
1. Do they fit well into asuran society or are they more at home with other races? How do they feel about fellow asura? Is it because of their personality or something else? Is there any deal maker or breaker?
It's probably no surprise that Ruju's opinion of asuran society isn't particularly great. Between growing up among Inquest and struggling with a learning disability that made school much harder for him than his peers, the guy just never felt like he fit in anywhere. The highly individualistic dog-eat-dog culture really did NOT do him any favors. Even in his Dynamics timeline he still felt like an outlier, preferring hands-on work and often requiring detailed written instructions that he could refer to when his memory blanked.
It really wasn't until Ruju left it all behind to join the Vigil that he ever felt like he really belonged somewhere. He still keeps in contact with his old krewe as friends, but they all know he's never rejoining.
Likewise, his initial feelings about other asura are generally cautious at best. And at worst? He's been known to get pretty hostile even right at the start if someone puts him even a LITTLE on edge. Ruju's much more likely to give a fair chance to others who are like him, leaving it all behind to find somewhere they feel more at home. While he can learn to live with asura that are proud of their own personal accomplishments, those that cross the line into mocking other races and customs raise his hackles IMMEDIATELY. The guy has no patience whatsoever for the ideologies that allow the Inquest and others like them to flourish right there in Rata Sum. He also tends to assume the worst of anyone with past Inquest ties, even if they've long-since left the organization behind.
But really, any asura stubborn-- and perceptive-- enough to get past Ruju's prickly exterior will eventually find an extraordinarily loyal friend. He's tough to win over, but even tougher to shake.
So I know what you're (maybe) thinking; 'are there any races Ruju gets along with better, then?' Well, that's complicated. He didn't have a whole lot of contact with other races until he left Rata Sum, so most of his knowledge base was from asuran stereotypes of their cultures-- which, well, led to more than a few awkward and insensitive encounters. It took him a while to feel them out on their own terms and figure out what was true and what wasn't.
Unfortunately, this guy's mouth moves a fair bit faster than his brain most of the time. That probably says it all right there.
The only race he never warms up to is, ironically, the charr. He finds their heavily militaristic society and loyalty to the chain of command too stifling for the most part, despite initially relating to their ferocious fighting spirit. It's really only the outliers like Rox and the Olmakhan that he winds up liking by the end. By contrast, he comes to really appreciate both norn and sylvari-- and he'd probably like skritt a lot too if he was a bit more open-minded about them. But alas, Ruju is pretty sure that having more than one chaotic rat in a room together would lead to horrible no-good things, and he MORE than fills that quota.
3. What's their family like?
That one was answered over here!
24. Do they have any particular opinion on the Peacemakers and the Arcane Council (and Eye)? Do they have any direct experience with them?
HOO boy this is another meaty one. Ruju didn't really have experience with any of them until he moved out to Rata Sum, but none of his interactions were particularly positive. When he was young and naive he wanted to believe they were better than the Inquest... And then he realized that the moment there was any real danger-- or ESPECIALLY a direct conflict with the Inquest-- the Peacemakers were always conspicuously absent. As soon as he noticed that, all semblance of respect was out the window.
Ironically this menace actually WANTED them to do their jobs, at least in the situations where it actually mattered. (Like, say, when Teyo is wreaking havoc with hacked security golems.)
As a result, the Peacemakers got the brunt of his rebellion; Ruju found out pretty quickly that they didn't dare to rough him up because of his parents' notoriety, and he absolutely took advantage of that to be a pain. On top of that, magitech cuffs would almost always fall off from his air element shorting out their circuitry, creating a whole fiasco as they assumed he was slipping them on purpose. Sometimes this led into wild 'races' across the city when he'd get sick of squabbling with them, just casting superspeed and swiftness on himself and bolting... Straight to the cells. All that fuss JUST to turn himself in without being cuffed. Once they realized Ruju was messing with them and not actually trying to escape, they just stopped chasing and let him at it-- and put that note specifically on his file to try and warn any new recruits not to engage.
Not that every rookie necessarily READ that file, though...
Regardless, Ruju still spent enough time in a Peacemaker cell during his younger years that they practically had one reserved for him. But despite the many arrests, he never really considered them more than a nuisance-- and a method of getting back at his parents by being a total embarrassment in public and getting them to pay his bail.
The Arcane Eye on the other hand... Over time, Ruju's opinion shifted from vague annoyance, to disrespect, to outright disgust. In his Dynamics timeline, well. Let's put it like this. He had the option to either reveal the truth of Gorr's research on the Elder Dragons to everyone via transmission, or go violently beat an entire squad of Arcane Eye officers to death in their own hideaway. Guess which option won out. (How has this guy NOT gotten banished.)
Likewise, he can't stand the Council either, but just generally tries to avoid them and stay out of their jurisdiction. And after what he did to their finest spies, that avoidance is DEFINITELY mutual. He's threatened multiple seated members at this point and they don't particularly care to test whether he'll make good on that.
Ironically, Phlunt is one of the few he can actually tolerate. Meanwhile, lock him in a room with Flax or Haia for more than a few minutes and the Council might have a very freshly vacant seat to fill.
Now for Sylffa's questions!
1. Do they fit well into asuran society or are they more at home with other races?
8. Do/did they have a krewe?
You can find both of these ones too over here!
27. Have they been impacted by that whole Pact thing? What do they think of the First Pact Commander, Aurene and the whole Elder Dragon mess?
Sylffa was a member of the Priory when the Pact first started taking form, but limiting her knowledge and exploration to a single faction always bothered her to an extent. So, saying that she was curious about the prospect of expanding her horizons would be a MASSIVE understatement. As soon as those doors opened, she was practically on the first flight over. If something THAT big was in the works she absolutely wanted to be a part of it! Getting to work on the Pact airships was one of her proudest moments, immediately followed by getting to see the fleet she helped design soar into action.
While Sylffa might not have seen a lot of the action herself, she also made a point of assisting many of the outer camps with repairs-- along with working on defensive measures to keep dragon minions at bay. She was NOTORIOUS for seeing just how many laser cannons she could cram onto the walls before they'd have structural issues. Some would argue that she wasn't taking the situation NEARLY seriously enough, but the rest would respond that even if she was maybe a bit too excited about getting to see her heavy artillery designs at work, you couldn't really discount the results. In reality, burying herself in her work was just the easiest way to compartmentalize; focusing on getting results and then putting them into action made all the stress worthwhile.
The fall of Zhaitan wasn't the end for her, either. She stuck with the Pact all the way through to the end, occasionally sending inventions to Ruju to test out in the field. A few-- like a prototype position rewinder-- have stayed in his inventory to this day.
As for the Pact Commander and Aurene: that definitely depends on who it is! In any world where Ruju reaches that station, she definitely has a positive outlook on the two! They might not be as close as they were during college, but still very much qualify as friends. He shared quite a bit with her about his 'honorary progeny' during Aurene's younger years so she knows the dragon isn't quite as scary as she might seem. They've only ever met briefly though, with Aurene having assisted her group during a Branded outbreak on Dragonfall. Sylffa made a point of saluting her before she flew away.
In any other version of events, though, Sylffa would've been unlikely to know much of the Commander and Aurene-- aside from their role, that is. She would've considered an honor to meet them, though! And even MORE of an honor if they used any of her gadgets in the field.
If you were to ask her if she had any regrets now that the cycle is over, she'd claim she wishes she could've given Primordus a good whack herself for her ancestors' sake-- but really she's just glad it's over. In the wake of the dragons, Sylffa hopes she can put her focus into inventions that help people via means OTHER than blasting dragon minions to bits. She's made enough laser cannons, it's about time to try something new for a change! How she'll apply her expertise in the future remains to be seen, though.
#my posts#GW2 asks#gw2 asura#Ruju the Spitfire#Explorer Sylffa#answered asks#long post#IT IS DONE...#ty so much for sending the ask even if it took me 300 years to finally get it done HDJUDHDH award for slowest poster goes to me#anyway this probably tells you a lot about what Ruju would be like to deal with as a peacemaker. the answer: terrible.#he finally decided it was funny to make them chase him and get them to clothesline themselves on obstacles. smh#(I now apologize to your rat again. the moment Ruju realizes he's not getting drowned in the harbor he'd be The Worst)#in the height of irony he'd prob respect them more if they just freakin' tackled him to the floor and got it over with rofl#he actually LIKES sparring so he'd have WAY too much fun fighting them head-on if they ever dared to try it#(and then he'd promptly let them win because he doesn't want to risk actually HURTING them. he's just a brat HDJDG)#also yeah funnily enough his disdain for the Peacemakers ties DIRECTLY into how he starts off the personal story#since if he actually trusted them to do their jobs he wouldn't have bothered HDJDG he knew they wouldn't do jack about it#meanwhile you've got Sylffa who'd ALMOST be wholesome if she didn't think laser cannons were an essential component of every structure#if it doesn't fire concentrated burning death at your enemies it's not done yet!! go back to the drawing board#they're both troublemakers just in different ways HDSJDGDH
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if i might bitch about work for a second: yesterday was hellishly bad despite being able to keep up with it and i found out that apparently our department made 4600 dollars yesterday which is making me angry beyond belieffffffff
#this is math i do fairly often bc i enjoy ho-hum math and hate my job and like#even if we took off 2000 bucks for overhead costs which feels excessive but i will concede it#that would be enough to pay everyone working a little over 860 dollars which is 300 more than what i make in a WEEK#literally WHEREEEEE IS IT WHERE IS IT GOING WHERE IS IT#i dont like following this logic through because on days where there are fewer orders we;d do less#and i disagree with gig work's implementation as ive seen it and i think that would stress people out worse than we already are#(which is significantly)#but at the same time. 850 dollars. i cant afford to buy groceries this week. 850 dollars...#can i get a BONUS or SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#it makes me soooo angry i was talking to one of the deli guys who asked for a raise and got denied mid-question#before our director accidentally showed him that their department is four thousand of gods own dollars under labor#its so revolting to me i talk to so many people in this store who are terrified because of medical bills or rent or car shit#half my department works two jobs just to get by and ALL OF THEM drive junkers#honestly one of the things thats scaring me about if i actually move out is that i do rely on...living with my mom#i pay for most of my own food i pay an absurd amount of rent to share a room with her but she's willing to drive me to work#even though i've offered to walk multiple times and she REALLY should prioritize her own time more#but at the same time...not having to pay for rides has been carrying me hard#if i got a car i'd be fucked because those things bleed money and generally ethically i disagree with cars#but if i dont its like okay pony up the money learn to navigate buses (except for sunday when they dont run) or get ready#to walk to your job where you walk all day and then walk home in the dark#which. i love walking. and listening to music on my own while walking. so bad example. but i also love not having my feet hurt#all the time always no matter what im doing which is something im becoming increasingly unfamiliar with#its like. ultimately. something's gonna get fucked no matter what#and then i hear a figure like 4600 and i remember how avoidable all of this shit is. how avoidable it is for ANY of us#our ceo is gonna walk away from this merger attempt with 5 billion dollars in safety-cushion money#the 10 top execs beneath him with 1 billion#and its just so. what can you even do. 5 billion. can a number like that even mean anything? how could you possibly need that much#850 dollars would be a lifechanging amount of money for me right now and im not even one of the worst off#its just. god. this world could be anything but what it is but its this and for what
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I’m failing at art right now Idk what I’m doing and I have 0 ideas what is going on it’s 2am
#like my artstyle what is that#and poses idk how to do that#or backgrounds#and also i dont like doodle or sketch at all i only make finished pieces#should i just relax#idk how#i’ve been playing fortnite#i got over 300 000 score on one song in fortnite festival on the bass#also the hardest difficulty#because I’m awesome#should I stream drawing#and fortnite#and other games maybe#should i drW#should i sleep#I’m literally going crazy#can you pls tell me to relax#i love you guys#i love cock and balls#will you guys breakdance with me#anyway#pls someone tell me to relax#i want to hug someone#party rock is in the house tonight#for your information#I love gojo
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#there are so many parallels between terra and clive#im so sad they wont get to meet#and confused#i am distraught#and disappointed#the in game notice just said they cant bring us the experience we expect anymore and im???#wdym you cant square did you lay off the devs or smth#i have over 300 hours in dffoo :')#it's what got me into ff as a whole :'')#theyd better fill the void with another dissidia entry at some point is2g#nothing else has its energy#i think id feel better if i actually knew why and it wasnt just... a vague statement#this hurts on a personal level i did not think possible#must be how the club penguin players went when the game shut down#my post#dffoo#dissidia#final fantasy#dissidia final fantasy
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are you having fun with flopping on your stray kids fics
someone forgot to check the other blog before sending this ask
#dunno what your definition of flopping is but i don't think that's what's happening over there#my lino/skz stuff is doing better than a lot of my bts fics#my most popular drabble over there did better than my most popular drabble here#i just got 450 notes on a 177-word answer to an ask#and almost 700 notes on a random 300-word blurb#what do YOU think lol#i'm doing pretty well for myself thank you for asking actually#seriously. this made me feel pretty good lol#this ask reminded me of an anon a couple of months ago who said i wouldn't get a lot of readers if i wrote for someone that wasn't jk#well. the turntables#anon#answered
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i hate you stellar warp, i hate you i hate you i hate you i fucking HATE you
#YELLS WITH FRUSTRATION#now up to 70 pity#271/300 so 29 more pulls until choosing#just...all i've gotten from this fucking warp the ENTIRE time i've played this game is a bronya himeko and one 5* lc#i want other peoples' luck SO BADLY i want to cry#like all i got from the starter warp was bronya and then those 3 things from regular/stellar and like#why am i so fucking unlucky why is my rng so bad#every time it's the same thing just one shitty 4* thing and that's it#and yet there's people who're like wow i got two 5* and three 4* and i got it at 35 pity lol#like here's the spots for gepard and bailu or even welt or yanqing or clara in my roster IF I EVER FUCKING WON THIS WARP#/sigh#all i wanted for fucking month after month after month for what 3/4 of a year has been gepard (or now him or bailu)#and nothing just jack shit nothing#and none of the other 5*s either like there's fucking seven of them i've gotten two there are FIVE others it could give#but it never does#if i finally win one to pity and it's a duplicate himeko or bronya i am going to literally learn chinese to yell at their entire staff#now to wait another 3-4 weeks until i can scrape together another 10 passes to see how it screws me over next time#please ignore my sr bs
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that fic idea where WWX is sent to a universe where JC isn't paying attention to him/being sad about him because JGY was JC's childhood bestie... effervescent
the many stages of WWX's reaction
YEAH. THE FEELINGS. THE MANY STAGES OF WWX'S REACTIONS INDEED
(sorry I got overboard while thinking how things would play...) it's very long!!
you haven't asked, but imo at the start, wwx is very excited! He is in his old body again! He has his strong golden core back!( Imo he is scarred by being 'the number one cultivation world's enemy'.) So, it's nice having cultivators who admire him! He is happily married with the love of his life, he is an accomplished scientist and a fun teacher! He didn't even kill 2000 people or his shijie! Everything is perfect.
So he goes to visit jc: his shidi isn't mad at him anymore! Why should he be? He didn't have crimes under his belt anymore.
Lotus Pier, the SAME lotus pier as before the massacre (there was a war, wwx knows that. Maybe during the rebuilding jc has found someone with great memory! Nice!), doesn't throw him out. He feels welcomed.
And then he goes to the sect leader (he has to ask before the disciples let him in the throne room. Rude, but he understands, jc loves formality. - lwj is quite confused... Why would sect leader jiang immediately run to welcome them? But wei ying is happy, so he holds back)
And then, they arrive at the throne room... And jc is there, at his rightful place, proud and scowly, and wwx is so HAPPY. He's at home again!
"jiang cheng, I am back!"
"..."
"..."
jc is so confused that stares at him, unimpressed. He doesn't know this wwx, but he has heard how weird he can be. Still, his inventions are amazing and useful and he is lwj's husband, and lwj is important to lxc... He can't be rude, he has to maintain a good relationship with the Lan. "I didn't know that wei-xiansheng has already been at Lotus Pier before, but I am glad to host such honorable guests. I would say to make yourself at home, but you have already done it forgetting formality", he sneers and wwx is confused. What the fuck jc?! Do you want formalities?! I beat your ass so many times, do you want me to bow to you???
Before wwx can say something, jc calls his second in command and Meng Yao arrives. He escorts them, under jc's order, to their guest room.
wwx is so confused that he lets it happen. Then, he asks his husband what the fuck is happening. Why is meng yao here? Isn't he dead? lwj is worried about his husband' deteriorating memory, but he answers. He would do everything for his husband. But then wei ying's face goes white, then red, then purple! Is wei ying sick?????? He needs to find a good healer to help his husband!! So he leaves the room with an excuse.
In the meantime, wwx is fuming! MY killed shijie!!! He killed jzx, shijie, 2000 people, then comes back (how?? Idk. plot. plot), and JC LET HIM AT LOTUS PIER. JC WHAT THE FUCK!! YOU COULDN'T STAND MY SIGHT FOR ONE SECOND, NOW YOU LET MENG YAO IN!! BASTARD.
It's unacceptable! He needs to fix things!!! He has to, if jc doesn't!!! He goes to jc's personal pavilion ('see, meng yao, I know lotus pier! Even better than you!' he mocks MY speech and suggestions about lotus pier's best inns).
When he arrives, - he sneaks really, now lotus pier has an hell of security system, he almost got caught! That never happened to him before! - he sees jc, MY AND jl eating at a low table. All together. Happily.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? JL EVEN YOU! THE BETRAYAL! wwx knows that jl in the other universe forgives him (he is shijie' son, at the end of the day) but jgy's too???? Now???? jgy wasn't stabbed by jl! What right does he have to sit at his side?!?! And jl and wwx's relationship was still fragile, they were still working on trust and shit like that, what's the easy way they talk???? JC STOP PEALING LOTUS SEEDS FOR MY TOO. ONLY JL CAN HAVE THEM.
Unfortunately wwx is caught by the jiang disciples. They brings him to jc and wwx snaps: "jc what the fuck?!?! He killed shijie!!! You should be skinning him alive not feeding him!! Or just whipping him because you are boring. Whatever. But what the fuck?!"
And jc gets mad, but not 'wwx has pissed me off but it will pass'mad or 'I am rightfully even if unfairly mad about shijie and the peacock' bodies 'mad. No, he is 'you are pissing me off and I would kill you without thoughts - but REALLY KILL you'mad.
jl snaps "how dare you talk about my mother like that?! Do you wanna die???"
And jc" mister wei has overstepped his stay and bounds. I'll forget it for the sake of our clans, just this one time. Nonetheless, what happens to meng yao is a jiang family matter"
Lwj arrives and apologizes in wwx's stead. Then lwj drags him out of lotus pier. wwx is confused and angry. What is lwj doing?? He explains to his husband that jgy's the devil! He is bad and mean and a cunning manipulator! He killed wrh! He killed nmj! He killed jgs!
But lwj is even more worried: yes, Meng Yao - who is jgy? - killed wrh, but both jgs and nmj are still alive. Maybe wei ying is tired. Lwj is so worried about his husband's memory.
No one,- lsz, wn, ljy- believes him... And it's just as before, when he was all alone against the world, where no one believes him or in him... The food is tasteless, the world seems again to not have a place for him... His home isn't his home anymore...
But wwx has shit to fix! He needs to help jc and jl to see jgy's real nature! HE NEEDS TO FIX THINGS
And that's the fic:
jc's unmovable love for his family plus jl's good heart plus jgy cunning scheming vs. wwx inability to handle jc's emotions (indifference is unacceptable! How does jc dare to forget wwx?) plus his exaggerated reactions
#sorry i got carried away#But I would love a fic like that#Imo things will degenerate#And not in wwx's favor#He was easily manipulated by jgs - even if he was traumatized as hell. But still#See imo jgy is even more smart and cunning than his father#He has political awareness he can shift a situation in his favor#And he has jc wrapped around his finger#He has the upper hand!#Into my mind wwx dies again maybe taking down with him at least 300 people#Then he wakes up and he is alive again! Without thinking too much he runs to lotus pier from the cloud recess even with this weak core#He arrives half dead slurring things like: 'jc stops. jc no I killed shijie. It's me who you are mad at. He is scum. Leave him'#jc is confused but concerned : isn't lwj taking proper care of wwx? Let him run like that! Everything could have happened to him without#a strong core!#Then jc hears : 'I am back...'#And he is immediately 'YEAH YOU ARE BACK'#Then he takes wwx and starts to fuss over him giving him spicy soup and lotus seeds#And wwx understands that maybe the first time he wasn't talking to jc but he was avoiding him#The other jc has said that he will support jgy because he is his family. no matter what happened in the past.#And maybe this jc thinks the same. He is fussing over him he is scolding him again as if he cares about wwx#And after what seems almost 3 lifetimes wwx is at home again
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im going to end up homeless
#txt#5 months of actively applying to over 300 applications and only getting one interview where i got rejected at the end#and i lose my job the 21st#i should just kms#suicide mention in tags#sure was nice being able to buy groceries every week instead of once a month#ill never find a job making what i make now#have to go back to once a month groceries and praying debt collectors wont sue me and garnish my wages
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#so today i broke down and fully cried over realizing the reality that i probably won't be able to go see Taylor on this tour#and i felt so stupid for it like crying over not getting to see a concert seems so trivial and i mean so many reasons but like#and like i don't cry much anymore like I've been through and am in so much pain and horrible stuff constantly and so much stress and trauma#but I've built up strength to not cry over those things like if i did I'd just be crying nonstop so i channel my emotions into trying to#solve the problems and like still I'm so unbelievably stressed but like also as an empath i feel everything really deeply but usually lately#the things that make me cry are more like sweet animal rescue videos acts of kindness touching stories or really deeply inspirational or#relatable things in books etc but so like I'm like mad at myself for crying over this but#i checked the stubhub like prices for what tix are going for and it's fucking over 500 a pop for nosebleeds i just#it's infuriating the scalping and how many hard core fans are unable to go bc of that but rich ppl who aren't really fans i just. 1000 bucks#for 300 level is just no I'm sorry that's not ever gonna happen and i just#i really thought I'd just find tickets over time closer to the event like that's how I've done several concerts but then i looked and saw#that and I'm like oh my god and that's before fees and then there's the gas to get there the repairs that need to be done to the car to get#there all the other fees involved and in realizing oh my god like I've been overconfident and now i don't see a way and I'm so sad and i#just broke down its i know iy seems stupid but first this feels like something that might not happen again anytime soon if ever the way the#world is going out could be last chance and rep tour was the first time I'd been able to see Taylor to begin with and the experience was SO#amazing it's like the one thing i looked forward to this year that lifted me up in really dark times and again i feel shitty when there's so#many fans who never get to see her international too i just. I'm sorry I'm just like this breaks my heart on levels and like#i hate how money dictates everything i hate that i went to eds last tour tickets in the same venue were 30 DOLLARS and even the Taylor ones#i think were like 75 and now it's so high bc only scalping it's so fucked up and like I'm already in a really bad hole money wise bc of#an emergency issue that happened and I've got some scary medical things going on waiting on tests and having trouble with rent and food and#gas so like i can't even try to be like. you know? like justify trying to save up that much even when i got all this#i just.
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these last few days were literal hell bc of me having to cram 3 books worth of knowledge into one week due to my procrastination curse, but will i learn my lesson? no, since i still passed the exam
#personal#they asked the most random ass questions tho ?!!!!!!!!!!! like i memorized more than 300 pages for them to just ask the most random ass shit#they were also so moody since they had examined a lot of groups already before ours#and ALSO they asked everyone else in my groups at least 5 questions meanwhile they asked me 3 and a half if that half can even count#is my presence that small akjsjdjk#i answered 2 and couldnt answer 1 and half so techinacally i got what deserved with a 6 out of 10 BUT ??? helloo this wasnt fair#but out of 11 ppl in my group they failed 5 (!!) so me getting such an average grade makes me feel a bit grateful#everyone esle that passed got a 5/10 except for 1 who got a 7 good for her honestly but she was unhappy too since she clearly had studied#for more than that....not to mention we had to wait 2 hours to get in ....tragic BUT OH WELL#IM FREE of public law !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! now theres only criminal law and its gonna be over. for good. oh god#cant believe i will have the chance to graduate in a few months......if i fail the exam in summer and have to try again in fall i will cry
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its times like this when i really wish i had an SO's shoulder to cry on
Because I think i factrued/sprained my foot the other day it happened wednesday but its still pretty swollen and pops when i try to walk on it without hobbling. i know i signed up for health insurance through work. i wrote down the insurance company name as Bayside and I have my personal insurance id number but the card never came in/got lost in the mail (and i already called for one replacement that never came so idk if theyll send me a third) so i cant confirm the insurance name nor call them, but i need to because ive called/visited 5 health care facilities around me and NONE of them have even heard of Bayside. So im calling the phone number that my manager provided me with telling me that was the insurance company. I keep calling the number (and mind you ive called them before to try to get a second insurance card sent to me but that was in like April) and i get that its saturday but theres no answer and the stupid automated machine wont let me leave a voicemail. the automated answering voice on the phone also says that theyre called National Benefit Plans by SafetyNet and google says the phone number im using belongs to National Benefit Plans out in San Antonio Tx (i live no where near there). I found National Benefit Plans' website on SafetyNetPlus dot com but National Benefit Plans doesnt have their own website, just through SafetyNet, and also the SafetyNet website says on a side panel that "this is NOT insurance" and instead keeps saying "health benefits" instead so idk what the fuck ive been paying for for the last 6 months tbh and im having an emotional breakdown bc i dont want to fuck my foot up for life just cause i couldnt figure out my health insurance/benefits shit
#ive been fucking sobbing on the phone for 20 minutes calling the phone number over and over again#im about to mcfucking lose it and im sad and confused and scared because my foot is still so swollen even though it doesnt hurt very much#and google says if swelling on an injury like this persists after 48 hours to go get it looked at#all the walkin clinics near me dont have any xray techs til monday & quoted me anywhere from $130-$300 if i dont have insurance which i can#provide proof of nor am i even sure i actually have at this point and im ngl my guys i only have like $180 to my name until next friday#but then basically my entire next paycheck is going to Geico#and overall im just having a really really really bad time rn and im scared that if my foot is actually fractured im gonna fuck it up worse#by walking around on it without a boot/cast. yeah ive been sitting at work the last few days#but its front desk at a hotel so at least for the first hour of my shift and last 1.5 hours i HAVE to be standing#my foot was so swollen after work today it hurt to get my shoe off#im just really fucking stressed and anxious and confused and im sitting here sobbing my eyes out realizing theres literally no one i can#call just to vent and cry it out with#cant call my mom cause i busted my foot leaving her place after her husband got in my face & screamed at me for saying you cant hit people#cant call my siblings cause none of them can help/we dont talk often enough that i feel like i can burden them with this#i have a few casual friends but same sitch im not close enough with them that i feel comfortable venting while sobbing to them#i could call my ex but shes got a new boo now/its not her problem/we rarely talk anymore/she cant help so no point in calling#only other person who knows/is worried about me is my ex's mom but she wont be home from work for break til 2pm & its 11:30am rn#not close enough to any of my coworkers either#its times like this that i realize how truly alone i am these days with no one that can physically comfort me#which of course is only making me more upset#thats what i get for being depressed and reclusive the last 2 years and only letting people get an arms length reach from me emotionally#there is a medical clinic i can go to that is a 50 minute drive from me and without insurance you just pay a $20 sliding fee plus a little#extra for the care services but again theyre not open until monday and also its a 50 minute drive from me#so all im learning is i shouldve gone some place thursday morning after it happened and im fucked at least til monday#FUCK my STUPID BAKA life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#whatever. guess imma keep icing it try to keep it elevated and just endure it and hope it doesnt get worse#emma rambles#vent tag#DONT REBLOG
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