#that was just to do the reference to Constantine

[rowan-r-ridley]

PiB drawigs that I forgot to upload here 👌

[leona-florianova]

Illustration for Hellblazer fanfic Another Tricky Day (by NAOA on ao3)

[talentforlying]

one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.

canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.

[soultoken-archived]

american comics are wild, man.

[solarplanet2]

Little Eldritch Creature part 2

DCxDP Prompt/Drabbles

Chirp! Chirp!

Bruce expected many things when Oracle suddenly told him in comms that Jason's tracker went to the cave.

He expected something might have happened to Jason since Oracle had told him that his comms were gone, cut off.

He did not expect a little glowing creature chirping, almost in concern, around Jason.

"Get it off me!"

"Todd! I won't tolerate you hurting the little creature!"

"Why is it so cute?"

"What is that thing? It's not a fish right?"

"A worm maybe?"

"Ugh....bright.."

Little. Cute.

The said creature was small, with a green tail for legs, white hair that floats and blue skin, from closer inspection, he looked like he was wearing a long sleeve black shirt with white cuffs. Their ears were slightly pointed but still visible.

And also big wide green eyes that reminds Bruce of puppy dog eyes.

Bruce should be really freaking out right now. An unknown entity is in the Batcave and it seems to like Jason and charmed his family.

Which usually is not a good sign.

Bruce cleared his throat, gaining everyone's attention, that includes the little creature.

"Jason." Bruce says slowly, it made the said man grimace. "Where did you find...him?" Bruce took a moment to look at the creature who was clinging on the side of Jason's helmet, looking at Bruce as if he was listening. When Bruce hesitantly said the pronoun as if acknowledging the little creature, the said creature nodded.

Well, He understands him. One question out of his list.

Jason clicked his tongue. "I found him where Oracle reported about the disturbance in the satellite. That's when my comms started to loose cignal. I saw something glowing by the dumpster and when I took a look...I found him."

The little creature chirped in cue, as if he knew Jason was referring to him.

"And then he went in and smack into my face." Judging by Jason's tone, it wasn't good experience.

"And he just what? Stuck with you?" Tim asked suspiciously.

"I tried getting him off but he won't--!!" Jason did try. He tried grabbing the little creature off him but Jason's hand went through him or even letting go from Jason's helmet and floated around him as Jason tried to catch him. Then went back to holding on to Jason's helmet on the side.

"See!? Get him off! I have other things to do!"

The little creature chirped as if he was amused.

Bruce sighed. He should call Constantine even if he doesn't want to, this is clearly magic stuff.

Bruce takes off his cowl and grabs his com. "Let me call Zatanna about this."

"Uhm....B?"

Bruce blinked at the green eyes staring right back at him. The little creature suddenly let go of Jason and floated towards Bruce. The Small thing was staring at him before tilting his head, from Bruce's observation, it seems like he was confused, debating.

"Dad?"

Bruce blinked.

What?

: )

Part 1

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 102

 Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath. In for ten seconds, out for eight. Alright. Okay. “Let me get this straight,” he didn’t motion to the three teens- or not teens even if two apparently looked like they were- but it was a close thing. “You-” 

 Phantom perked up, white hair flickering with what he was pretty sure were stars as they turned away from the window looking out into space. “-are two years old.” The fae-esque being who looked more like a fourteen year old gave a half-distracted nod. Which, for a toddler, they were paying attention pretty well. 

 “You-” Klarion looked up from where he was fiddling with the cuffs that had been on him, cat sprawled on his shoulder now that it was out of the carrier. “-are six?” Another distracted nod, the apparently-child seemingly enamored with the sounds the cuffs made when they clinked together. 

  “And you-” He turned towards Marvel, who shrank back before seemingly steeling themself. “-are in fact ten.” The… well they had thought demigod but apparently all three were some sort of realms-being, which had apparently made Constantine pale and start cursing before stomping out of the Watchtower. Another nod and shaky thumbs up. 

 Alright. Okay. They had in fact let a ten-year old join the league, which wouldn’t have been so bad if they had known. Especially the fact that apparently Marvel was only half-human, which suddenly explained so much about how he didn’t know so many things about a human life. Which-

 “You,” he turned towards Phantom again to make sure he was listening before returning his attention to Marvel. “And you have both lived at least a year in the human realm with human companions, but your-” He turned his gaze towards the ravenette in the center. The six year old apparently. “-experience with the human realm is literally just with the Light.” 

 Yet another distracted nod. Okay. Bruce was tempted to scream in a room for the entire situation that had cropped up from the single action of taking Klarion’s familiar and then the boy himself into custody. Then again, it was honestly a much better thing they had apparently caught this. 

 “Alright,” he sighed, suddenly feeling incredibly exhausted. “To make sure I have all of this correct-” Because it was already a shitshow and the amount of shouting had absolutely spooked the child. To the point he’d- according to Marvel- made what was apparently some sort of very distressed noise that had made both him and Phantom running. Or rather flying and portaling. 

 “-in the realms, people there make friends through fighting,” Bruce pauses to make sure he got that part correct. The origin of this entire misunderstanding with the chaos-lord. Lordling? 

 All three nodded, Klarion losing interest in the cuffs and starting to pet his cat. Familiar. Everyone had referred to it as a familiar and Marvel had appeared utterly horrified that they had taken said familiar away. Somehow he was the one the trio were currently trusting and weren’t doing the same towards any of the other league members. 

 “And you have been trying to make friends with the Jr team, which they have been taking as an attack due to this miscommunication.” Honestly they should have gotten more information, though he couldn’t exactly blame any of the teens, what with everything they were currently dealing with. 

 “... is there any sort of guardian or something you might have, that can be contacted? Or anyone that could help prevent a situation like this from happening again?” All three avoided his eyes, suddenly finding things like the table and walls very interesting. 

 Oh. Hm. This could be a problem.

[call-me-strega]

Dc x Dp prompt #1: Angel

I'd like to preface this by saying I'm incorporating tropes I've seen in other posts.

~~~

Jason has been a lot happier recently. His Pit Rage has been getting less and less frequent, he's cooking and coming over to the manor a lot more, and he even let Dick hug him last week without threatening bodily harm!

The rest of the batfam, while happy for him, are curious about the change. So one night at dinner they ask him what's up with him and why he's so happy recently. Surprisingly, instead of taking it the wrong way and getting mad Jason is eager to share.

Apparently, Jason has a boyfriend now. Yay!

He goes on and on about this civilian he met after stoping a cult who was trying to summon a deity and how he is this nerdy college kid who really likes space and how their civilian identies shared the same Gen Ed course so he made an effort to become friends. Turns out that nerdy space guy had caused the initial improvement in mood and his offer to go on a date to an incredibly diverse and well-stocked library had been the cherry on top.

The only thing is that Jason didn't want them stalking the guy and refered to him around the family exclusively as "Angel". Everyone thinks that's just a cute pet name he gave the guy as a way to both reference and distract the civilian from the cult ritual he was probably rescued from. Little do they know that it's actually because "Angel" was not a victim of the cult ritual but the summonee, that appeared in the form of a biblically accurate angel.

One day some supernatural entity decideds to attack Gotham and everyone is calling whoever they can think of for back-up. Batman calls Constantine, Nightwing calls Zatana, Red Robin and Robin are contacting the Justice League, and even Red Hood seems to call someone.

The situation is getting desperate. The JL is here but at most the can just slow the supernatural being down. Constantine and Zatana are still 20 minutes out and things are looking bad when another Eldritch Being spawns and seems to take down the threat in one move.

Everyone stands stunned as the being turns to them and in a booming voice exclaims "DON'T BE AFRAID. I WAS CALLED TO HELP". They all go through several emotions upon hearing those words. Where did this being come from? Is this a biblically accurate angel? Who called it here to help? Was it Zatana or maybe Constantine? Are they here yet? Upon looking around it is found that Zatana and Constantine are not here yet and the heroes get ready to engage this being carefully when a voice calls out

"Angel!"

Everyone whips their heads around to see Jason climbing over debris towards the Eldritch Being in front of them. The Batfam feels faint with a creeping realization and Superman swears he heard Batman's heart skip a beat for a second. Before anyone can ask Jason what he's doing the being shapeshifts into the much smaller form of a young fae-like creature with pointed ears, fangs, stark white hair, and vibrant green eyes floating in the air. He flys over to Jason before a flash of bright light leaves a young man deep black hair and frosty blue eyes in Jason's arms.

Jason turns to introduce his boyfriend to his family and the League only to find that Batman has fainted, a panicking JL, and a gobsmacked Zatana and Constantine have who've arrived in time to see the transformation. As Zatana and Constantine begin to freak out and prepare defensive magic Batman comes to and levels a scowl at Jason.

"Hood, I think you have some explaining to do."

[letoasai]

dp x dc Chronos part 5

Part 1 - Previous - Master list

Diana was furious. 

She’d known her young uncle for only a handful of hours but here she was, ready to go to war for him. Perhaps that was what her grandfather had meant earlier, his words still ringing in her ears. 

I have a task for you, Diana. One i do not think you will turn now but i’ll give you the illusion of choice.

Perhaps it was less an illusion and more her grandfather merely knowing ahead of time how she would react. If Danny was to be believed – and he did seem such a trustworthy boy – his Clockwork knew every path one could take. 

She knew there were still questions to be asked, but Danny had been able to tell her a great deal before his eyes began to droop and she insisted he try to sleep. The curtains to the room had been left open and she watched as his eyes happily glazed over at the sight of open space before him. It had only taken minutes for him to fall asleep. 

Now she had a lot of work to do and she planned to get as much done while Danny slept as she could. 

She entered the conference room with a quick stride, many members already present for the meeting she had ordered via text. They’d learned that some equipment didn’t work well around Danny. Visuals were blurry at best and audio crackled into something indistinguishable. Diana had instead been texting information to Bruce and Kal to look into while she focused on the boy. 

“Were you able to find anything?” She asked immediately, not elaborating on which fact she was talking about. She’d sent them so many little snippets that she didn’t really care where they started. 

Batman just grunted, and despite wearing his cowl, she could see just how unhappy he was. 

“You’re not going to like it, but you expected that.” Superman said, papers laid out in front of him. He wasn’t the only one doing his research. 

Green Lantern and Flash were still there, the latter looking like he was having an existential crisis over the topic of ghosts. 

Martian Manhunter had also arrived, his frown informing her that the others had caught him up on what had been happening. 

“Can we confirm the truth as Danny has laid it out for us?” She asked, taking a seat. 

“Oh, yeah.” Hal muttered, rubbing a hand down his face. “Constantine will arrive later, but he could confirm the new High King of the Infinite Realm went by Phantom. Never heard him sound so horrified as him learning that someone had punched a hole into another realm in their house though. Inter-dimensional war crimes on our end are stacking up.” 

“Our end?” She asked. 

“The GIW…” Bruce began, sounding a mixture of exhausted and livid. “Are completely out of their depth and did not have the authority to just name a species unidentified to the rest of us as non-sentient. If the Infinite Realm retaliates, and John thinks it’s a possibility, it won’t just be aimed at the GIW alone but the entire dimension. That makes this more of a mess for us to clean up than it already was.” 

They’d already decided to help, that was what they did. But there was a difference in lending a hand and righting a wrong and taking responsibility for someone else’s fuck ups because they had to. 

“Can we prove it?” Diana asked. 

“Absolutely.” Kal nodded. “Honestly, for a government agency, their security is a joke. There was a backdoor already in place. We can ask Danny about that later.”

Diana nodded, certain the information would be good in his hands. She turned her attention back to Bruce. “The Fentons?” 

There was a certain level of disgust that tried to choke her out in that situation. Danny had been so hesitant, the betrayal fresh and painful. She had lived in the World of Men for a long time now and it had as many delights as it did drawbacks, but to learn what Danny’s parents had attempted to do to him left her burning to seek them out herself. 

His mother had lost her privilege to refer to herself as such.

She didn’t care what the circumstances were. Capture and torture with the intentions of vivisection was inexcusable. The target being a child made it all the more heinous. Diana knew Batman would understand without her saying a word. 

“Run of the mill mad scientists. They might have been onto something once when it came to energy but their bias took over. Even if they had been correct about ecto-entities, their language is incredibly inappropriate. No licenced and competent science journal would be associated with that.” He stared at her unhappily. “They’re lunatics. The fact that their children grew up in their home is outrageous.” He hit a button on the remote and a location appeared on the computer screens. 

A bricked house on a street corner, enormous Fenton Works sign taking up most of the front. It was an eyesore, but not as much as the sci-fi looking shuttle sticking out of the roof. The OHSA violations alone should have had the building condemned and there was no way permits had been granted for any of that construction. 

It was a supervillain's dream and not the least bit subtle. It should have been a crime in itself for the town to allow it to remain in a residential area and was shocking that no calls to Child Protective Services had been made. 

Yes, Danny was an exceptional being, but Diana understood now all the likely scenarios where he could have died in that house. Danny had called his death an accident, but she wasn’t so certain about that. “They were the ones to hurt him.” Diana said, hating how her throat was tight. She was already emotionally compromised. 

“Yes, i know.” 

Diana’s attention snapped back to him. “How?” 

“Simple reasoning. They are unstable ghost hunters with questionable science. Danny was removed from his home for his safety. Chronos said he needed a guardian. That doesn’t paint a pretty picture.” Bruce muttered. “Either his guardians couldn’t care for him, or shouldn’t care for him.” 

She felt her shoulders relax somewhat, knowing that such a logical conclusion should have occurred to her too. She really was worried about Danny’s recovery. “We can add it to the file i know you’ve created, but i’d prefer if no one asked him about that at this time. This last attack only happened several days ago and it is still fresh on his mind.” 

Bruce’s eyes narrowed, always a hound when it came to sniffing out abused kids. “This last attack?” 

“They’ve been after him for a while.” Diana hummed, though she’d only had a vague example or two since Danny hadn’t wanted to get into it. She couldn’t imagine how he’d just returned home every day to parents who tried to capture his other persona. 

“We must factor in his identity.” Martian Manhunter approached them, having been listening. J’onn had been doing his own research the last several hours. He laid down a startlingly clear picture of Danny in his white haired ghost form. A print out of an Amity Park newspaper article. 

“What is that?” Bruce frowned, sliding it closer to read. 

“The hero of Amity Park. Phantom. The articles are biased and unfavorable, but that is not the current accepted public opinion. Phantom protects the living from ghosts. He also protects the ghosts from the ghost hunters.” J’onn explained, voice carefully neutral. “Phantom appearing other places, perhaps shouldn’t coincide with where Daniel Fenton ends up.” 

“A name change could be warranted. If that’s what he wants.” Bruce adds. 

J’onn gave a single nod. “It’s a great deal of pressure on one teenager's shoulders. Being a king of a realm on top of that…” 

It was silently agreed upon that Danny deserved this break and Diana was going to get it for him.

“It was only a matter of time before something had to give.” Diana said, turning enough to speak to everyone in the room. “Well he won’t be dealing with all of that alone now. We start with dismantling the GIW, appealing the Anti-Ecto Acts, and smoothing over our relations with the Infinite Realm.” 

“Only that much, huh?” Flash muttered, trying to wrap his head around the science of ghost hunting. 

“Why not get some of the kids involved. Young Justice, maybe?” Hal was rubbing his eyes, not looking forward to the consequences of this mess. “Once he heals it might do him some good to be around others closer to his own age. People he wouldn’t need to hide half of himself from.”

When put like that, Diana could only agree. 

“I’ll mention it to him.” “I’ll get the information i have to Lois.” Clark said, sliding his papers into a binder. “If public opinion of Phantom is already decent in Amity Park, then we’ll up the exposure to put pressure on our oblivious government.” 

“I’ll take a few of the GIW facilities.” Bruce muttered, but he had that familiar tone that said he was about to let his children go buck wild. “A little recon…” he added vaguely. 

Before anyone else could put in their own two cents, the sensors went off, exactly how they had before Chronos had arrived. A paranormal knock of sorts before the very air seemed to split in two, a glowing green portal building around it. 

“Here we go again.” Barry muttered, each of them surrounding the portal as they’d done early for safety’s sake but they were less inclined to fight immediately. 

As J’onn was seeing it for the first time, he remained near Diana, keenly watching the portal manifest. It wasn’t Chronos who stepped out though, it wasn’t human at all. 

From the portal stepped a creature that Diana didn’t have the name for. Bipedal, humanoid, but beast like in appearance. Horns on his head and spikes from his tail made of ice were noticed secondary to his arm of ice that still encased his bones inside. His fur was white, his claws could easily kill and he was covered by a kilt and cape. 

What gave Diana pause as the bag slung over one shoulder, the tell tale signs of a medical cross across the front. 

“Who are you?” Superman asked, more polite than their earlier run in with her grandfather. 

The creature, a ghost presumably, held himself rigid. He was doing a great deal to make himself appear smaller then he was but his gaze was assessing. He was ready to fight if necessary. 

“I am here for His Majesty, the Great One.” Was his response. 

Diana stepped forward, deciding this was exactly what she suspected. “I am Diana. Granddaughter of Chronos who Danny fondly calls Clockwork. You are Frostbite, come to check on Danny, yes?” 

All of his attention was on her now, but he seemed to see what he wanted in her after locking eyes. “I am. Frostbite, Ruler of the Infinite Realm’s Far Frozen. I have come to see Our Savior the King, as his primary physician.”

“He’s a doctor.” Flash whispered. 

“Fascinating.” J’onn muttered, sounding a little winded by whatever he was sensing. “He is who he claims.” 

“I’m relieved.” Diana muttered, approaching him with a smile this time. “Please come with me and i will take you to Danny. I’m afraid we did what we could but his unique biology left us questioning our choices. He is resting in a private room.” 

“Did something happen to setback his recovery?” Frostbite asked, serious over the care of his charge as he followed Wonder Woman out of the conference room without so much as a glance back at the other heros. 

“Excitement, i believe.” Diana offered. “He may have been a little too excited to show off his alternate, living form and seemed to forget his condition.” 

Frostbite actually snorted. “Sounds like him.”

“I did not realize how badly wounded he was. We had been talking about our arrangements and he was answering my questions about ghosts. He appeared sore, but fairly pleased to speak with me. Given what he had just been through…” 

Frostbite grunted his agreement. “His heart is soft, but his will is unlike anything i have ever known. Many of us saw this tragedy coming, but he insisted on seeing it out for himself, hoping for a favorable ending.” 

Diana cracked her knuckles out of habit, that anger still simmering. “He will be safe in my care, i assure you.”

“The Great One is the rightful King to our realm, but many forget he is still just a child.” Frostbite said, eyeing her even as she led him through the Watchtower. 

“It is not something i am likely to forget.” Not after she’d seen how small he was in their medbay bed. “He’s resting but weak, you can help?” 

“As long as he has not taken more damage, i’m sure i can.” Frostbite said, a gentleness to his voice as they stopped at Danny’s room. Diana went in first to prove the area was a safe one but that may not have mattered given how quickly Frostbite followed her. 

He was at Danny’s bedside in an instant, having somehow moved passed her without knocking into her. He could have gone through her for all she knew. For all he seemed to be a hulking beast, Frostbite was nothing but gentle as he examined Danny. He looked over any and all work that had been done to Danny since his arrival, and checked the bandages across his torso. He went as far as to grab the clipboard on the foot of Danny’s bed to read, having no trouble understanding the medical jargon. 

From his medical bag, he pulled out several small bottles, all of them growing a toxic green. Injections were given to the teenager, and it didn’t seem to matter that he was in his living, dark haired form. 

“Has he explained to you what it means to be a halfa?” Frostbite finally asked, breaking the silence. 

“Only in vague, teenager terms.” Diana said. She’d been quite sure that Danny’s flippant attitude was more a coping mechanism than anything.

Frostbite just hummed. “Then i will have to fill you in.”

[worstwolverinesbf]

batfam as things i and others have said pt 3

damian: you’re like mozart if he wasn’t dead

tim, playing piano: *shocked* did demon just compliment me? did i just get complimented by demon brat?

———

tim after rambling and making bruce confused: i know what im saying but you and me aren’t speaking the same language

———

tim referring to hisself and kon: camera sluts and fire hoes

———

duke explaining why he didn’t stop joker dying on day shift: sometimes murder happens

———

bruce: *talking about some medical thing*

tim who hasn’t slept and is overstimulated: do you have bugs in your skin

———

jason being a little shit: (talking about john Constantine) he didn’t do it with bruce but he should have! everyone should have an opportunity to do it with Bruce

———

steph who forgot her adhd meds: coconut coconut does what ever a coconut does can he fly no he dies

———

tim: *having a breakdown casually* everything is so fineee, *sees a hot guy* im so gay

———

pt 1 pt 2

[hijinxinprogress]

YJ being awful at sharing things (mostly bc they’re used to handling things themselves bc there was no one for them to depend on during their childhood)

YJ is great at subterfuge and lying but they keep unnecessary things on a need-to-know basis like their favorite colors so when people are like “why didn’t you tell me?? I can help! I hope you know you can come to me if you need anything” and yj responds like a stray animal being shown affection for the first time “with what?? nothing’s wrong…go away…” but they’re always injured or about to be whether it’s physical or psychological 

Cissie didn’t tell anyone she was allergic to walnuts until Oliver almost killed her at a mandatory family dinner (they also didn’t know she was in the Olympics or dating Kon until they were cornered by reporters in public who wanted to know if Kon was aware she had a relationship with Oliver Queen) (Roy had a very one sided beef with Kon for about three weeks once he saw the interviews)

Yj is outed for smoking when Bart gets caught with weed and the jl (mostly Barry) are lecturing him about the dangers of marijuana and Wally’s yelling bc they thought it was the titans smoking while bart just shrugs and he’s like “I thought you knew, it’s not like we were hiding it” they call a meeting w/ yj but Cissie’s just like “I mean what are you gonna do about it? You’re a couple years too late to be concerned” and behind them, an irritated Kon passes a handful of bills to a smug Anita

Or Tim’s been stabbed for the 5th time this week (and didn’t tell anyone bc he’s Tim) Cassie tries to hand him tequila and Bart looks at them like they’re stupid “he can’t drink that” and dicks in the background “no he can’t bc he’s literally a baby and so are all of you!!” and Anita reaches over to Kon who’s not paying attention and he’s like “yeah, rob got stabbed like an hour ago and didn’t say anything bc he’s a squirrelly little shit” and dick launches himself across the room holding 17 medical packs (he was supposed off planet for the next three months)

Diana hears yj refer to Cassie with they/them pronouns and pulls them aside to ask if they want to change their name (hero and civilian) and why they didn’t feel comfortable sharing their identity with her and Cassie just goes “I didn’t think it was a big deal”

Most people think that Anita’s raising her children so older heroes with make comments about her being too young to be a parent or being irresponsible for being a parent so young along with how it makes them unable to trust her judgment as a hero (Steph once made an offhanded comment about Anita being a real hero for raising twins after she cussed out an older hero) but no one outside of yj learns the truth until dr. fate shows up talking about irreparable damage being done to the timeline (the nearest speedster gets dirty looks despite not being at fault this time)

Yj invites Greta to the watchtower and she meets Constantine who starts going on about her being death-touched, possessed, and rambling about dark magic so he ends up calling the rest of jl dark which is how the jl finds out about Secret years after the fact

Kon casually makes jokes about Lex’s attempts on his life, Lex and Clark attempting to win him over to get one over on each other, Lex or Clark disliking him, his death, and the period of time Kon was homeless which is usually how anyone outside of yj finds out about things going on in his life

The jl loses their shit when they learn how often yj hide each other in their homes when they don’t have anywhere else to go (batman buys trackers in bulk when he finds out Tim has a secret house) 

[sokoneedsagun]

Pt 2 of batfam as things me or my friends have said

Steph- “if you ever refer to my mother’s relationship as ‘doomed yuri’ again I’m mauling you.”

Tim and Dick- “why is it staring at me-

Don’t call a baby an it??”

Cass- “you couldn’t beat that information out of me, actually no you couldn’t shoot it out of me”

(For context this was said while baking cookies)

Jason and Roy- “well for one thing it’s incredibly hot

The temperature kind or the other kind?

The temperature kind you fucking dumbass.”

Damian and Tim- “it looks like we’re gonna have to kill this guy.

IM THE GUY???”

Tim- “I’ve gotta give up my 15 year old (I’m 17) in the divorce with a man I’m not married to”

Duke- “you know something gives me the feeling that the speed limit isn’t *70*.” (This was in a 45)

Duke- “(Bruce)’s new thing is telling people that if they don’t take care of their kids he will, and when I asked him about it he looked at me and said ‘I’m already doing it with you.’ so I think I got adopted-?”

More under the cut

Jason- “did people say anything else about my brother?

Apparently he made a bunch of people be gay

what”

Jason and Dick- “Courtney Love is my favorite problematic blonde woman

Really I thought it was your mother?”

Tim- “I’m not a twink I’m just trans”

Talia- “so you’re a mom against cat boys?

Yes. In every sense of the meaning.”

(Shout out to my mom for saying that👍)

Commissioner Gordon- (in the most exasperated voice) “don’t go jump off the roof.”

Barbara- “it is 45 degrees(Fahrenheit) and 7:45 am. Shut the fuck up.”

Bruce- “now what’s shit do you want that’s on Amazon so Santa can contribute to capitalism?”

Damian- “white people food tastes like olive oil and depression”

Cass- “listening to a woman scream into a microphone and call it music is very therapeutic to me”

Bonus-

Constantine- “my advice, if you’re sad, alone, and gay, summon a demon it worked for me”

[sonnyaavce]

DP x DC prompt # 8

CLAIRVOYANT DANNY X DCU 

He knew he had no choice when he called Constantine for help, but Commissioner Gordon dropped the case off to him; unfortunately even he or Oracle weren't able to find any leads to any suspect or clue about it; so meeting the magician was his last resort but… 

"Okay Bats, I'll help you in this case just this once, but after that we'll cut it short, okay?" John barked in annoyance as he threw his cigarette butt onto the ground; Batman just grunted in annoyance at the blatant dismissal the British always did with any cases of disappearances in Gotham, citing that the city was way too danm cursed and he wasn't interested in going near the ‘toxic hotspot’

“Then, Bats do you have any lead that we can start with?” asked the warlock, looking as disheveled as always. Bruce just let out an exhausted sigh before handing him over the case folder and debriefed the contents of it:

“The wife and child disappeared while the husband was on a business trip, he found his house looted and destroyed, a ransom note was found; in it demanded an exorbitant sum of money for the life of his missing wife and son. However, the note was old, so the victim suspects that his wife and son are already dead, so the police couldn’t link it anyone; no new bodies had been dregde from the shores, no suspects has been found so far and there are no video recordings of the night of the incident."

Constantine hummed as he skimmed the pages to quickly, uninterested “So, why are you asking me again? By the looks of it, isn’t this just an unsolved cold case?” John grunted as he handed the folder back, but Batman only hummed “If you look at the ends of the photo evidence you will see why I need your insight on this”

John skimmed at the pictures again before stopping short at the picture. The picture in question had been taken in the foyer of the mansion with the portrait of both wife and son on the floor, but the bizarre thing was, that there were covered in random runes that seemed to be eerily glowing a green hue; John's eyes widened as he stared at the peculiar sigil and runes adorning the photograph. As he studied it more intently, a chill ran down his back as he grumbled.

“I might need to call someone for a more insight on this one though” John hummed, taking out his phone to screen some of the pictures with the glowing sigils before sending it to whoever the magician was texting before starting to call someone.

Batman didn’t care and only grunted annoyed as he listened to a one-sided conversation for a minute until the blonde was done with it and stared to fumble with some folder paper that was in his side pocket “Who did you talk to just now, Constantine?” inquired Batman, walking closer to the Brit as he spoke some unknown incantations in midair, opening a portal “just a little friend who is good with this type of death magic”

And coming out of a green portal, floated a small child covered in a white hue. With a snowy whi\ite hair and green luminescent eyes, a planchette carried in his arms. Constantine closed the portal behind him; the small child-creature brightened up as he saw the magician and quickly floated closer, his NASA hoodie that was too big for his small body gently swayed in his hovering. 

"Interesting," Batman muttered, eyeing the child with wariness.

The child smiled enthusiastically at the magician. Batman eyed the magician suspiciously as John ruffled the child hair before explaining, with a huff of fond exhaustion “this is child's name is Phantom, he’s what the occult like to refer as a psychopomp and clairvoyant who helps the souls to cross over and who might have ansers to this case”   

"And how can he help us with it?"

The child's eyes glimmered as he spoke, a wispy voice exclaimed raising the planchette up "I help using this" said the small fey as it showed Bruce with pride it's planchette; then sided towards Constantine curiously “The Lady Gotham Knight smells like death, is he one?” the small creature asked, making the Brit splutter in a panic.

“h-he’s not the one that I asked look into!” hastily showing the picture to the kid with the strange sigils in it, the psychopomp grabbed the picture and put it under the planchette, floating down and putting the picture in the ground with the small wooden piece on top.

Placing both of his arms out and closing his eyes in deep concentration, his voice who was childish in nature just some seconds ago turned heavy and echoed as it started to recite ominously:

Ostende mihi quod olim absconditum fuit o mors, da mihi ducem! ubi latent umbrae et morantur; illumina vias meas ut eas

As soon the small psychopomp finished the strange incantation the small crystal in the planchette started to glow an obviously shade of toxic green for some seconds before fading away making the small child frown worriedly making both of the adults tense, Constantine moved first before tapping its shoulder cautiously "what did you manage to find?"

The small fey grumbled as he floated up, scrubbing his eyes tiredly "The missing are not in this place, they are lost and away"

-TBC-

masterpost

Translation

show me what was once hidden oh death, grant me a guide where those in the shadows hide and linger, lighten up my ways to find them out

[apenitentialprayer]

i know that as a catholic you just have to believe with what the church says but i really dont like the belief of the original sin, i feel like its such a horrible thing to believe about yourself and about other human beings too

There are actually ways of legitimately dissenting from less essential Church teachings in a way that leaves you in good standing with the Church; I'm not sure if Original Sin is one of those things, though, to be honest.

But, anon, I'm going to offer another perspective here, starting from a quote (perhaps ironically?) from my favorite heretic. One of the things that James Carroll believes is that Original Sin has been given a bad wrap. In Constantine's Sword, he says:

I referred to Augustine’s assertion of the idea that the human condition implies a perennial state of finitude, weakness, and sin, all of which will be overcome, even for the Church, only with the end of time. [...] Augustine is thus regarded as the father of a severe, flesh-hating, sin-obsessed theology, but that dark characterization misses the point of his insight. His honest admission of the universality of human woundedness is a precondition for both self-acceptance and the forgiveness of the other, which for Augustine always involved the operation of God’s grace, God’s gift. Only humans capable of confronting the moral tragedy of existence, matched to God’s offer of repairing grace, are capable of community, and community is the antidote to human woundedness. Augustine sensed that relationship as being at the heart of God, and he saw it as being at the heart of human hope, too. This is a profoundly humane vision.

I wish I had understood the spirit of this quote when I was in high school. I remember learning in my World History class that Islam teaches that all children are born good, and then the world makes them evil. And I remember my teacher asking how that compares with Christianity, and I raised my hand and said that Christianity teaches that all of us are born evil. Because I believed that at the time. And, really, the whole framing of that question was wrong and gave really simplistic representations of what Islam and Christianity teaches, but I don't think we're alone in having internalized that understanding, anon. And that's a shame.

I thin it's important to remember the worldview that the doctrine of Original Sin is actively defending us against; there was an idea, that gets called "Pelagianism" (the poor guy it got named after may not even have believed it), that said that humans were capable of being saved on their own, by their own power. Someone on this site recently asked what people's thoughts on Pelagianism were, so you can read my thoughts here. But to keep it short and sweet, I think Original Sin is an important doctrine because it saves you from the need to be perfect.

There are ways to treat Original Sin that I think are certainly unhealthy, and I think the doctrine can be a source of anxiety and fear. But I also think, very deeply, that Original Sin should be a reason why we treat ourselves and especially our neighbor with kindness and understanding. I can look at myself and say "What I do, I do not understand. For I do not do what I want, but I do what I hate. […] For I do not do the good that I want, but I do the evil I do not want" (Romans 7:15, 19). And I can say that because I know I am ontologically wounded; that all of us have our weaknesses. That while we may still be in the moral wrong for committing a morally wrong action, our wills are compromised in a way that causes us to incline towards the comfortable and the easy rather than the good.

I wish I could go back in time and tell that class that Christianity does not teach that people are born evil. I wish I could go back and tell them that it teaches that we are born in a state of dis-integration, that we are wounded beings yearning for wholeness; alienated beings seeking everlasting belonging; beings lost in darkness, seeking the light. But I can say it now: the doctrine of Original Sin doesn't have to be an occasion to think you're depraved and without value, but it can be an invitation to come to terms with your own woundedness, because doing that (to use the words of Lutheran theologian Nancy Eiesland) "opens a space for the inflowing of grace and acceptance."

[butmakeitgayblog]

Teach Me

Ch. 7

Test days

///////////////

God, she hated test days.

The mind-numbing minutiae of it.

The waste of time that could be better spent actually learning. 

The way she had to show up to do… absolutely nothing. 

Pacing an ambling line from one end of the lecture platform to the other, her eyes swept the darkened room before checking her watch again.

“You have thirty seconds left to finish your thoughts for this piece, and then we're moving on to the final slide,” Lexa called out, remembering to soften her tone so as to not make the more consumed writers of the class jump nearly a foot out of their desks.

Again.

The screen overhead flipped from ‘ The Column of Trajan’ to ‘ The Arch of Constantine’, and the clock on the wall ticked on.

A few more minutes passed in relatively dull silence as Lexa mentally flowed through the lesson plans she had presented thus far, combing the downturned sea of faces and mentally shouting what she hoped the students had taken from them. 

Because she wanted them to do well.

Because she measured her own success as an educator by her student's every success.

Because if she had to read one more essay this semester that contained the words “lit” or “potato quality” in reference to ancient carvings, she just might tear her own hair out.

She really hated test days. 

Mind buzzing with thoughts of stylistic contrasts between High Empire versus Late, and wondering who among her pupils would draw the correct conclusions for why each piece represented on the test was chosen, Lexa felt her pocket vibrate as she settled down on the edge of the table at the head of the room.

Fishing her phone out, she glanced down and froze at the preview that flashed bright across the screen.

“That is a very tight vest you have on Professor”

Schooling her face despite the heat that bloomed bright hot in her cheeks, Lexa checked the timer she had set and barely hesitated before opening the message.

“Shouldn't you be focusing on your test?”

“Just finished a minute ago. Now I'm wasting time until class is over.”

“Shouldn't you want to leave then?” she thumbed out. As if on cue, she pressed her phone to her chest and nodded as a student traipsed up to the front and deposited their test booklet on the table before slipping out of the lecture hall without a sound. “It's a beautiful day. Go enjoy it instead of pretending to look busy.”

“But the view's so good right here…”

Straightening up from her slouched position, it felt like a herculean task to keep her eyes from beelining to the front row and exactly two seats to the left. 

Instead she made another lazy loop around the dais, scanning the crowd for moving pencils (and any obvious signs of someone having fallen asleep.) 

The dull squeak of graphite on paper had her winding back around to stand behind the safety of her podium.

“That's highly inappropriate. Remind me why I let you sit in the front row?” she typed back the second her hands were out of sight. 

She snuck another glance out into the dimmed lecture hall and waited.

“Because I'm your very favoritest student Professor Woods,” she read when another message popped up right below it. “And because when I wear this outfit you can almost see up my dress.”

/////////////

Read on AO3

[jesncin]

Spirit World nitpick but I do think it matters. Xanthe always refers to John as "Constantine" as if they're contractually obligated to say his surname like it's his registered superhero name when it's just his name. Why can't they ever refer to him as "John"?

A really weird side effect to the superhero-ification of John Constantine and making his surname essentially his hero title is that in stories like this, it accidentally and definitely unintentionally enforces a racist and sexist dynamic to how you refer to other characters in the story. Cassandra Cain is called either "Batgirl" or "Cass", but never "Cain". Xanthe Zhou is called "Xanthe" but never "Zhou". In a story where Johnstantine is the token white guy, it's kinda weird that he's the only one consistently referred to by his surname.

It even continues into the Pride comic the two appeared in. I know it can be argued that Xanthe is referring to John this way because he's older, but it's not consistent with how they've referred to other Asian adult or elder characters in Spirit World. It also makes it harder to buy that John and Xanthe are friends when they're not even on a first name basis. Idk, I think it would be cute if Xanthe had familial honorifics for John in some way or a cultural nickname. Make it fun outside of calling John "old man" all the time. Where's the imagination.

[mango-sp1ce]

Drowning out the small speech from the other hero, Danny peers out the Watchtower windows to see the stars.

Meeting his favorite heroes had been fun. But it had quickly turned boring. They all referred to him by titles and spoke to him as if he was something other. And he is something other, mind you! But he's also so very not.

Seeing Superman begin to move again, he zones back into conversation as the man guides him.

"And this, King Phantom, is the meeting area." He gestures to the seating arrangement and screens. Danny simply nods, sweeping his gaze over the room once before looking back at him.

"Any questi-" Before Superman can finish his sentence, a tan blur intercepts him, jutting into the conversation. The swishing of the material dies down to show John Constantine in his ruffled trenchcoat, pointing at Danny with the expression of the cat that caught the canary.

Neither of them say anything, staring each other down as Superman looks back and forth between them. Constantine's got a smirk on his face, whilst Phantom's eyes are wide as he avoids eye contact.

"Is something the matter?" Superman voices, taking a step in between the two. He has half the mind to tell John off about the way he's acting towards the royal, but instead shoots him an unimpressed look.

"No, I just-" Danny sighs as he stops floating, his feet touching the ground as he reaches to scratch at the back of his neck, "- I might technically be grounded right now."

Superman turns a confused gaze towards Danny as John lets out a tutting sound.

"Oh, that's not all big blue. He tell you about all the missin' work?" John says, crossing his arms in a way reminiscent of a disgruntled parent. Superman finds his gaze hopping back and forth between the two again, confused.

"Oh shut it pops! I've still got a week's extension!"

Superman blinks as the conversation suddenly carries itself, the two bickering back and forth over... schoolwork? projects? groundings?

Phantom screws up his face like an angry teen before suddenly disappearing without a sound.

John turns to him then, still sporting his original expression. "Don't worry about him. Told 'em he can come back once he finishes his literature project." And with that, he turns and walks away.

Superman blinks at the spots the two had been in before turning and glancing around the room. He was supposed to be giving Phantom a tour... but now he can't help but feel the need to check in on his own protege's grades.

Welp. It's not like he has anything better to do now.