#thanks again to the individual that sent me the link!

[narutocharacterpolls]

For some reason I can’t reply to the ask that sent me the link directly but:

THIS IS SO COOL ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE ART! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SENDING ME THIS I HAD NOT SEEN IT! HAHAHAAAA THIS IS SO GREAT, ABSOLUTELY GETTING A KICK OUT OF THIS AND IT’S SO GORGEOUS! I hope both Tenten lovers and Sasuke lovers will get a kick out of this, I think it’s so clever and very funny. Once again always feel free to send me the link to any arts or writing I may have missed created for this poll! My notifications get crazy so I certainly miss some of them, and I thank everyone that has sent me the link when I missed theirs!

[m3t4l-cru5h3r]

LIST OF FUNDRAISERS TO DONATE TO + RECIEVE ART!

Hi, everyone!

Firstly, I deeply apologize to all the people in my inbox wishing for me to answer their asks. I empathize with the hardships you are all facing and have my deepest condolences.

Formatting each ask individually was getting overwhelming, so I have decided to compile all of them into a convenient list.

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(Last updated 12/26/24)

BONUS: For every $10 donation, I'll draw you a headshot in my experimental lineless style (examples above)! These are exclusive to GoFundMe donations, and cannot be recieved as a normal commission.

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[putschki1969]

📢UPDATE📢"sprinter" LIVE AUDIO

Thank you to everyone who voted in my poll and left a comment in the reply section of my previous post on the matter. I was intrigued when @gslin sent me a link to this audio but I had no idea it would spark so much interest.

I received two very enlightening messages today that provided some substantial evidence. With the added information, I now feel confident that I can clarify the situation. This will hopefully clear up some of the confusion.

The first lovely follower (who would like to remain anonymous) sent me their personal recording of the live in question. They have been a fan for a very long time and got the chance to attend the concert back in 2008. First up, a big apology. I wish I could post the recording but they asked me not to share it so I will respect that. However, I've been given permission to talk about it so here's what I've been able to find out〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

Just in case you are wondering, there's no doubt in my mind that my follower's bootleg is legit. You can tell immediately that this was recorded from within the audience. There's clapping all around and the music is considerably louder than the vocals. You can still make out the song pretty well though. None of the voices sound off or out of place. It's blended together pretty well without losing the distinct vocal colours of the individual singers. Which is why I know that this can only be from the YKL Vol.#2 front act performance since you can clearly make out Maya during her "bokura ni dekiru koto wa tada" line and some other parts. From what we know, no other live performances of "sprinter" have featured Maya.

For the past hour or so, I've been listening to different versions of the song on repeat, mostly focusing on the YouTube audio and the newly acquired bootleg. While the bootleg is of admittedly quite low-quality, there are two things that very clearly set it apart from the version on YouTube. Those two obvious differences make it absolutely impossible for the recordings to be from the same live performance. And since we've already established that Maya was not present for any other "sprinter" performances, we can easily conclude that the YouTube audio is fake.

Difference #1: Absence of the infamous guitar riff. @octopusofpaint already mentioned this in the reply section of my original post. The YouTube audio has a pretty blunt opening whereas the bootleg recording starts with the guitar riff we are all so familiar with. It's hard to know how audios are cut/edited so I'd be willing to let this slide if it weren't for the next difference.

Difference #2: In the authentic bootleg recording of YKL Vol.#2, one of the final lines, "naite sakende kiete yuku bokura wa", is sung by no other than (!!)Keiko(!!). That is very surprising since it is usually not one of her lines. Look up any random official live performance of "sprinter", starting as early as 2009 on the NHK program Pop Up Japan, you'll absolutely never hear Keiko sing that line. You know who has always been in charge of it since becoming a three-person-unit? Wakana!! Now let's listen closely to the YouTube audio again, shall we? Whose voice do we hear? I'm giving you a hint! It's not Keiko's! But it's not Wakana's either!! Surprise, surprise, it's Hikaru's!! And do you know where Hikaru sings this line? Only in the studio version (and most recently during Kalafina covers at YKL but with a notably different voice so I won't take that into account here). And you know what else is very specific to the studio version? The lyrical cold open without a guitar riff. This leads me to believe that the studio version was almost certainly one of the main sources for this awkward mash-up on YouTube.

Now onto the second message I received today. This time from my lovely follower @concretebadger. Thank you so much! Many of you speculated that the 2010 live performance might have served as an inspiration for this supposed "unreleased" audio track. And I think you were not wrong about this. While I do believe that the studio version might have been the "main" source, I do think that the creator needed to add something else to make it sound more like a live performance. This is where the 2010 Red Moon version comes in. @concretebadger actually took the time to mash up the two tracks for a comparison and the result makes it quite clear that the two audios are eerily similar. Check it out for yourself〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

If you use the studio version and Red Moon live version as base layers and then add a few tweaks here and there to distort certain sections in order to make them appear more raw and unedited, you basically end up with that mysterious track that's currently floating around on YouTube. The previously mentioned line "naite sakende kiete yuku bokura wa" might actually be a good example for the layering/mashup of those two sources. While you can definitely identify Hikaru's vocals during that part in the YouTube audio (indicating the usage of the studio version as base), there seems to be a slightly different texture to her voice that makes it sound almost ethereal. This is most likely due to Wakana's singing of the line being added to the mix. It's very subtle and Hikaru's vocals are certainly more prominent but it's worth mentioning.

Anyway. Mystery solved. At least for me. Maybe you still have some thoughts on it. Feel free to share them below.

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | ten.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, (eventual) smut

—word count: 5.5k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, dancer lee know and dancer hyunjin (choreography video linked for inspo), implied jealousy, oc x minho are incredibly cute and share a lil dance moment heh, heated conversations/arguments, flashback at the end - lots and looots of crying/breaking down, jisung to the rescue 😔, worthy to note that this is an important chapter but it's not the only thing that occurred in their past..

—ON ROTATION: every kind of way - h.e.r | pray you catch me - beyoncé

"Uh, yeah. We'll start in about 5 minutes or so." You hear Minho's voice just as you turn the corner and arrive at the dance studio. You had closed up at the flower shop tonight, so you thought it would be the perfect time to watch Minho's class. He sent you the address and offered to come pick you up, but you told him you'd catch a ride over instead. Besides, his class would have been starting soon— you didn't want him to be late or missing for a class he was leading.

"You sure you're good?" San asks, just steps away from the studio. Minho catches sight of San escorting you near the door, and it instantly makes his heart sink.

So, San dropped you off.

Fucking great.

"Mhm. Thank you, Sannie." You look up at him with those eyes and it's so obvious San adores you. Who wouldn't?

"Let me know if you need me to pick you up? I'll be at the gym for awhile working out with a few friends."

"Okay." You wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a hug, and Minho has to divert this attention to something— anything— to prevent the irritation from increasing. "Hey." You tug on your bag strap as you walk in, already feeling a little out of place especially without any other familiar faces by your side.

"Hey." Minho gives you a tiny smile, brushing off his feelings about San. "You made it."

"I said I would. San was nice enough to drop me off."

"Yeah, I see." He clears his throat a bit.

"I'm definitely not dressed right." You nervously look down at your leggings and oversized crewneck before scanning the room again.

"It's alright." He lets out a small laugh. "You're just watching, anyway."

"Still." You chuckle and step inside, nearly hugging the wall with how many people are in attendance. You follow Minho to the far left corner in front of the room where you can peacefully watch without being in the way, setting your things down and taking a seat on the highchair.

"This gonna be okay for you? You can always move down if you think it's too loud or too crazy."

"Yeah, I'll be okay."

"Bathroom's just out the door and down to the left if you need it."

"Thanks."

"Don't make fun of me, okay?"

"I'll try not to." You chuckle as he starts to play his playlist, instructing for people to start stretching. It's nice to see Minho in this element because although you'd really like to remember this side of him, you can't. A few faces look your way with small smiles creeping up at the corner of their lips, making you wonder if they found you familiar. Surely, you'd been here with Jisung before— that's a given. 

When you look out at the center of the floor, Minho is talking to another individual. He's tall, with longer black hair nearly hitting his shoulders; a bucket hat on with a longsleeve and sweats. They look at you every now and then while Minho mutters something, followed by a nod from the unfamiliar individual. Then, he walks over to you, a small, toothless smile painted across his face.

"Hey Y/N, it's nice to see you."

"Hey." You say, doing a head tilt to observe him a little more.

"I'm Hyunjin. We've met when you used to visit before." His smile grows a bit. "It's nice to see your face again, glad to know you're doing well."

"Yeah, it's nice to see you too." You respond, unsure of how to move forward with Hyunjin. He seems nice though, and he seems fond of you.

"Hope you enjoy the class." He says once more before shutting off the music and calling attention from the class. They begin to explain what the choreography will be like for today— something quick, but fun and upbeat. Minho and Hyunjin start playing Bryson Tiller's On Top, demonstrating the choreo to the class. The class yells in excitement and it makes you smile, seeing how involved and supportive everyone gets. 

Class officially starts with Hyunjin and Minho breaking down the steps, allowing people to ask questions and get comfortable with the piece before practicing it a few times, then moving onto the next set. You even join in some laughs every now and then when Minho and Hyunjin start bickering, the rare moment Minho messes up his own choreography and catches himself with that look on his face.

He's cute. 

Very cute.

Especially, when he looks your way and throws a smile every now and then. You have to look away from time to time to stop yourself from feeling these feelings over your bestfriend because why did it feel so familiar, yet brand new? Situations like this can get awkward and weird quickly, but for you— it didn't feel that way at all.

It felt.. right. Like this is supposed to happen, like how things are supposed to unfold— somehow. 

After timeless practice and choreo clean up, the class is successfully dancing the piece flawlessly alongside with Minho and Hyunjin. Towards the end of class, they split them into different groups— allowing each group to do the piece together and freestyle a bit at the end. It's fun, and you love the atmosphere. You must've really enjoyed it back then. 

Too bad you aren't sure you could handle it anymore.

Once class is over, the class gathers their things and thank both Minho and Hyunjin for yet another fun piece. They wave and bid their farewells, with Hyunjin shortly following behind. He yells a quick goodbye to you with a wave, greeting Minho on his way out.

"How was it?" Minho brushes his hair back and throws his cap back on, sweat still dripping down his forehead profusely. He's trying to gather his breath as he walks towards you, wiping away at his forehead and neck.

"You looked really good out there." You smile. "You looked like you were having fun."

"That's good, right?"

"Pretty cool, I'd say." 

"Nice. At least you think so." You laugh.

"Did I use to come to class before?"

"Uh, yeah." Minho nods. "With Jisung. Chan and Seungmin would join too if they had time and were up for it."

"Sounds fun, and it looks really fun. I just don't think I could dance like that again. Wish I could."

"You can." You raise a brow. "Here." Minho holds his hand out for you to take. You give him a small smile before grabbing his hand, letting him lead you to the middle of the studio. "I'll teach you something simple, okay?" You chuckle.

"I-I don't know, Min."

"Trust me. You'll be okay. I promise."

"Okay, but don't laugh at me in the process. I'm probably very rusty and bad at this."

"Never." He smiles. "Alright." He says, standing next to you. He starts to show you the first 8-count, slowly guiding you through every step—patiently. He rehearses with you time and time again before teaching you another 8-count. It's a little more complex than the first set, but not anything incredibly difficult. You have to pause and ask Minho to repeat himself a bit, shyly laughing and apologizing at how many times you need to see him demonstrate. He makes you feel comfortable with the way he laughs along and tells you it's okay, reassuring that you're doing well— that you're hitting every step perfectly. Then, there's the other side that makes you incredibly shy and reserved again, especially when he asks you to do it for him while he watches. He finds it adorable how you cover your face and tell him 'no' repeatedly, only to finally be encouraged to step out of your comfort zone and do the steps on your own.

You feel good.

This feels different, but good.

But, at one point, you stumble on your own feet— causing you to trip. He catches you before you could take a nasty fall, holding onto your waist just as you slowly turn to look at him. He looks you in the eye and gives you a soft smile before helping you adjust your position.

"Woah." He laughs. "I got you. Are you okay?" He subconsciously brushes the hair away from your face and you feel the heat rise to your cheeks, unsure of where the sudden action came from.

"I am." You look up at him with those eyes. "Thank you." He chuckles as he lets you step aside and brush yourself down.

"Mhm. How about we do it one more time then call it a night?" You laugh.

"That sounds good with me." He starts to play Every Kind of Way by H.E.R, showing you the steps to the song before having you practice along with him to the beat. Sooner or later, you're doing the steps alongside of Minho for a couple of times before he praises you and calls it a night, just to make sure it doesn't overwork you and put too much on your body.

"You did really well, Y/N. See, I told you you'd be great."

"You're just saying that."

"No, I mean it." He looks at you and smiles. "How do you feel?"

"Tired? But, good. It was simple, and not too much."

"Good. You're a natural, anyway. My words don't mean shit." You laugh.

"You're the instructor here, of course they do." You give him a playful punch on the bicep. "Thanks for this. I really enjoyed it."

"Yeah?" He smiles. "That's good. Hope that means you'll be back to watch more."

"Yeah, I will." You grab your things as Minho continues to clean up around the studio. "I'll probably get a good sleep tonight."

"As you should." He grabs his keys as he takes a swig of water. "Ready to go? Wanna grab something on the way home?"

"I'm okay. Uncle Adrian made some food and stashed some away for me." You smile. "Thank you, though."

"Course. Let's go then, princess." You look up at him as he walks ahead, subtly biting your lip at the pet name. It rolls off his tongue so smoothly, it almost seems like this was a typical nickname for you— from him. 

During the ride home, you feel at ease with Minho to the point where it's a little sad you'll be leaving him soon. You've longed for his company for quite some time. Now that you finally have it, you don't really want to let go of it. He makes you laugh on the way home, cracking these jokes and showing off his dad humor to the fullest. Even though some of the jokes can be incredibly cringy to him, he loves hearing you laugh and giggle. He also loves the way you smile at him, the way your eyes sparkle every time you talk to him.

You're just beautiful.

You are love.

He hates that you have to part ways.

"Well." He parks the car in front of the house and looks at you. "Time for you to get some rest."

"Thanks again for today. I enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun." You smile at him and give him a small pinch on his arm. "I'll come by again."

"Good." He chuckles. "Have a good night, Y/N. Rest well."

"You too." You give him one last look and a wave before walking off. After watching you walk through the side door to get to your humble abode, Minho drives off to his next destination. He's in a good mood, but at the same time, he's not looking forward to his next interaction.

He knows he has to do this.

It needs to happen.

He parks his car in an open spot on the street, sighing to himself as he gathers his things and hops out the car. He's punching in the code to the lobby door before flying up the two flights of stairs. He heads down the familiar hallway, knocking on the door and anxiously standing aside as he waits for a response.

"Hey." Minho says as he stands in front of the door, watching as Kat smirks and tries to wrap her arms around him. He steps back though, and she confusingly looks at him when he gently pushes her arms back. "Sorry, I'm just here to talk. Do you have a quick minute?"

"Uh, yeah. I guess?" She says, gently closing the door behind her and stepping outside into the hallway. "What's up?" She crosses her arms as she eyes him up and down. Minho can tell she already knows where this is going, and there's really no way of sugarcoating the situation anyway.

It needs to happen.

Minho needs things to change.

"I, um—" Minho swallows the lump in his throat. He's just not good with this stuff in general, so he struggles. But, he manages to spit out the important part of this, which is: "—I don't think we should continue seeing each other anymore." She doesn't say anything for a moment to process whatever the fuck he just said, and the next response that comes out of her mouth is a pathetic little chuckle. Minho awkwardly shifts his weight from his left foot to his right foot, digging his hands into his pockets. 

"Of course." Her voice breaks off a bit towards the end of her response. 

"I'm sorry. I think you already knew where this was going though. I'm not sure what else to tell you." He probably looks even more like an asshole right now, especially with the way his expression doesn't really change; he's not doing much to explain, nor is he even trying with her in the first place. "This needed to happen."

"This needed to happen." She repeats as she crosses her arms and tears begin to fall down. She looks away to make it less obvious that she's starting to cry, but Minho catches on. She's hurt. Why wouldn't she be? He's a complete dick, and he has no one else to blame but himself for letting it get this far.

For ever letting it get this far.

"I'm sorry, Kat." He repeats because he doesn't know what else to do.

"Save it." She finally looks at him. "So, I was right." Minho just stupidly shrugs. "What's new, Minho? I don't know why I thought this time would be different."

"Kat." Minho lets out a sigh and shakes his head. "You and I both know we wouldn't work." He sighs again because truthfully, he did think they could at one point. He did try. He liked her.

But, he couldn't take it any further. It was just.. that.

"Okay, and then.. what? You're just gonna continue on with your sick little game and keep making her think that things are okay between you two? That your history is all pristine and angelic? Like you were always so fucking loyal—" Minho furrows his brows and lets out a little chuckle before shaking his head.

"We're not going there. Whatever goes on with Y/N, however this turns out— it doesn't concern you. As far as I know, it never did. At the end of the day, she's still my bestfriend and I need to prioritize her."

"Of course you do. That's your way of prioritizing her?" She rolls her eyes. "Goodluck with that Minho. She's gonna realize how much of a dick you actually are and want nothing to do with you." She gives him one last look before she's slamming the door in his face.

"I'm sorry." He repeats softly before turning on his heel and heading back down the hallway. He lets out a shaky breath of relief mixed with confusion, unsure of how to feel about everything because again— he's no good at this. And Kat is right, in a sense. You are eventually going to find out about all this shit, about how much of an asshole he was. Then, what? Would you want nothing to do with him? Would you stay away and keep your distance?

He's so dumb.

Why did he have to go and make all of this so fucking complicated? Now, he feels even worse. Because even if this page is closed, he still feels like he'll lose you.

And that's his fault.

Minho plops into the driver's seat, tempted to call you and ask if you've gotten settled at home. But, he stares at his phone screen for a good minute before he's shaking his head and setting his phone back down onto the middle console.

He should give you some breathing room. 

With that, he takes the drive home, letting the music in the background fill the emptiness. He's not sure if he has an appetite for anything. He'll probably drink some tea when he gets home and hop in the shower before laying in bed; staring mindlessly at the ceiling. Eventually, his thoughts will travel down memory lane, then they'll fix on you. Sooner or later, he'll find he only gets an hour or two of sleep [if he's lucky] before he needs to tackle another day.

Surprisingly when he arrives home, he doesn't see Chan or Seungmin's car out front. It's not uncommon for Chan to be home late, but Seungmin? He knows that boy would never miss an opportunity to hop in bed early. He sighs as he steps inside— tossing his shoes and keys aside before waddling into the kitchen to heat up some water. He can hear Jisung clicking away at his keyboard while throwing f-bombs and other curse words at his computer screen. Minho continues to dig around to see what's around and in the fridge, but still— he doesn't find himself getting hungry for anything.  

Once his water is done heating, he pours it into a mug and steeps his tea approximately for 4 minutes. He heads up the steps with his mug in hand, placing it down along with his things on his bedroom floor before walking to Jisung's room.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Jisung's yelling turns into a whine. He kicks his head back onto his computer chair before letting out a deep sigh, body slumped into the chair.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Just played such a shitty round." Jisung sighs.

"Where's Chan and Seungmo?"

"Chan's at the studio, and Seungmin's cousins are in town so he's out with them."

"Surprised he's out."

"Yeah, well." Jisung shrugs. "They don't come often." He turns to look at Minho. "How was Y/N during class today?"

"Uh, good." Minho shrugs a bit and chuckles. "I taught her something easy and slow afterwards. Then, I brought her home."

"Hm." Jisung hums as he eyes his bestfriend. Minho does that thing he does when he's trying to hide something [even though he's terrible at it in the first place]. He looks down at the floor and subtly bites on his bottom lip to prevent himself from smiling. "Okay, what is it?"

"Huh?" Minho chuckles a bit. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" Jisung repeats, already suspicious. 

"It was just a good class?"

"All of a sudden? Cause Y/N was there?"

"I didn't even say anything like that—" All of a sudden, Minho can tell Jisung is angry. Especially with the way he cuts him off and stands from his seat.

"What the hell are you trying to do here, dude?" Jisung angrily looks at him, and Minho knew this was coming one way or another. He knew it'd happen soon. 

He just didn't think it would be today. But alas, here we are.

Fuck.

"Okay, relax. I didn't even say anything. Classes are chill regardless." He repeats as he looks at Jisung, matching his energy. "Why are you getting angry?"

"Because! I told you. Don't do this. Don't make it harder on her. I asked for one thing from you and you couldn't even do that." Jisung spits back. 

"No one is doing anything! I let her watch class and I taught her something. Big fucking whoop."

"Right. You took her home after."

"And?"

"And? Don't act stupid."

"What do you want from me?" Minho pathetically laughs.

"I know you. I've known you for years and I know the way you get with Y/N. You're trying again, aren't you?"

"Because she fucking came to class and we hung out for a bit?" Minho rolls his eyes, then shakes his head. "Besides— even if I was, what is it to you?"

"What is it to me? You're joking, right?" Jisung pauses. "Have you forgotten about all the shit you pulled with Y/N?"

"Stop acting like I have because I haven't! Thanks to your wonderful ass reminders." Minho's tone raises a bit, and he adds a bit of sarcasm to his statement. "You can't come at me for being the only one in the wrong here when you're hiding all of this from her. If you were really worried about her, you should've came clean from the beginning."

"Oh, please. You have no idea what it was like to fucking see her crying over you!" Jisung yells back. "That's why I do it! You weren't there to comfort her and console her for days, Minho! Why? Because of all that shit with Kat! I know I can't protect her from everything but I'll be damned if I let history repeat itself. So, yeah, you might be right in a sense— maybe I should've told her from the beginning so she wouldn't have these expectations. But I thought of you, too. I didn't think you'd want to lose her that way either." 

"She's my bestfriend, too."

"Stop using that excuse. It's played out and it's old. You haven't treated her like that even after the accident happened. Get a fucking grip." Jisung lets out a small groan. "You know what she's been through, you know what you've done— yet, you're trying because she doesn't remember. You're so incredibly selfish." Jisung shakes his head. "Whatever though, you do you. If this gets all twisted and blown up at the wrong time, I'm putting that on you." Minho clenches his jaw for a moment while he looks at Jisung, but Jisung doesn't look like he's going to give this up anytime soon. 

So, Minho lets out a sigh before shrugging. "I made some stupid mistakes and I know I still do. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I started this mess and I'm sorry you had to see that because of me."

"Yeah, you should be. I don't know what I'll do if I see her hurt again, so please don't fuck this up any more than you already have. "Jisung sighs. He's upset, so he's saying whatever comes to mind first. But, the words hit Minho quick before Jisung can even apologize— cutting new, fresh wounds hearing his own bestfriend talk to him that way. 

"I'll say it one more time before I let this go. I know I fucked up, but I'm your bestfriend too. Sometimes, it'd be a little nice if you cut me some slack. I'm learning from my mistakes and I'm trying to do better. It doesn't happen overnight but I'm not completely hopeless, you know?" Minho turns towards his room and shuts the door, causing Jisung to groan into his hands.

"Fuck."

☁︎ FLASHBACK | SENIOR YEAR IN COLLEGE

It hadn't been too long before Minho was texting you, letting you know he was outside. You smiled to yourself and grabbed your jacket— tossing it on before shutting your door behind you. You waved when you saw his car, but you were quick to notice how unhappy Minho seemed in his car. He had his hood over his head, sitting in the driver's seat with a blank expression. You were excited to see him, but that faded once you realized he wasn't feeling the same way you were.

"Hey." You say softly as you step into the passenger's seat. "You okay?" He lets out a shaky breath before giving you a tiny, pursed smile.

"Yeah. Is it okay if we go for a quick drive somewhere?"

"Of course." You sit in the seat, uncomfortable with all the anxiety bubbling up in your stomach. Everything about Minho— his body language, his tone— says that things aren't okay, and you aren't sure if you're ready for what's about to happen.

Even though, you have an idea where this is going. Judging by how disconnected he's been from you lately.

Minho pulls up to a trail, lining the lake nearby campus. You and your friends have been here before, so it wasn't unfamiliar to you. What is unfamiliar is this Minho, how silent and cryptic he's being— how he's avoiding eye contact as much as possible.

But, he finally speaks. Even though it's a lousy:

"We should talk."

"Um, yeah. I think so. What's on your mind?" He sighs, but he still isn't making much eye contact with you even as you turn in your seat to face him. The silence is lethal, and you wish he would just come out and say it.

Why hold it off when it's clear where this is going?

"Babe." You say softly. "Babe, what is it, just—"

"I think we should break up." He finally looks at you, even when he doesn't feel enough courage to. There are tears lining his bottom lids, but they don't spill. He looks out the window again, finger brushing against his lip as he waits for your response.

The main reason why he immediately breaks eye contact is because he knows you'll cry. And you do. He hears you sniffing in the passenger seat, and he hears you holding back the sobs, the sounds that threaten to leave your throat. 

He hates this, but he thinks this needed to happen.

"Why?"

"Don't you think we should? Look at us. We've just been fighting lately. We've been distant. One moment, we're okay and then the next, we aren't. It's been a cycle and I know you're tired of it just as much as I am."

"No, you don't speak for me. I would never be tired of this. I wouldn't look at us as some kind of chore, Minho." Your tone raises a bit.

"See, that's what I'm talking about!"

"No, you don't know what the hell you're talking about! Because if you did, you'd sit through this tough phase with me and work it out instead of finding the easy way out." Silence. "All these years and you think this is how we go about it?" You scoff. "Why don't you be honest and tell me what the real reason is."

"That's the reason."

"It's not. It's Kat, isn't it?" Silence again. And this time, it shatters you— breaks you into bits and pieces more than you can imagine. Because even though he isn't saying anything, the silence is telling. "Please just tell me the truth." You say close to a whisper, your cries becoming heavier when reality starts to settle in.

This was it.

He was done.

Where did you go wrong?

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I just think it's the right thing to do." He isn't answering the question, and you don't know if that makes it worse.

Scratch that, it does.

He can't even tell you the truth.

"How long has it been?"

"What?" He looks at you again.

"How long has it been, Minho? With Kat. How long have you liked her?" He sighs and shrugs.

"I don't know? A couple of weeks or so?" It's fitting, the timeline is fitting. It could be close to a month when Minho has been distant. He tried, thinking this was all a silly little phase, a stupid infatuation. But it wasn't, and now he's to the point where he's too curious and can't even focus on fixing his relationship with you.

Such a shame, you think.

You tried to think of all the signs that you missed. The parties that he had gone to recently without you there, the small conversations in the library, the random texts. Hanging out with people on campus that he normally wasn't around. Jisung questioned it too, but didn't think too much of it.

Fuck. You are so stupid.

All these years and it wasn't enough— you weren't enough.

"I should've—" You pause as you start to cry into your hands. "Where did things even go wrong— I—"

"Y/N, please don't do that. We've just run our course and I think we have to accept—"

"Don't. You chose, we didn't just run our course." You groan. "I'm so stupid." A few tears drop when he continues to hear you sob in the seat next to him, but he quickly wipes it away and starts the car. He's just unsure of what else to do or say at this point. 

He's no good at this.

"I'm sorry." He says softly. "I'll take you back home, alright?" You don't say a word because you're exhausted from all of this already. Everything was wrong, everything felt wrong, uncomfortable, awkward. You hated this, and as much as you wanted to try and work this out—

There was nothing to work out.

You couldn't change his mind. He was set on it. 

You just wanted to get home.

And when you do finally get back, you simply unbuckle the seatbelt and swing the door open even as Minho calls for your name one last time with a pathetic 'please.' You don't even know if he said anything else, you don't care enough to figure it out. You just needed to get away from him.

As soon as you step back into your room, you feel yourself getting more lightheaded and sick to your stomach. You sit on the floor, back pressed against your cabinet as you shakily pressed Jisung's number on your phone. It rings twice before he's picking up, saying his hello's as brightly as he always does.

"Cielo! Yo! What's up?" You can't even get the words out. Instead, you let out a breath before you're silently sobbing into the phone. It's easy for Jisung to tell. Besides hearing your light whimpers, you haven't said anything since he picked up the call. His heart drops as he stops what he's doing and immediately begins to grab at his keys. "Hey, cielo. What's going on?"

"J-Jisung." You stutter in between cries. "Can you come over please?"

"I'm already hopping into my car." He says as dashes to his car, shutting the door and starting it up. "I'll be there really soon, okay? I'll be there." He repeats.

"Okay." You end the call and wipe away at your face. You tuck your knees to your chest, silently weeping as you wait for your bestfriend to arrive. Minho's words continue to repeat in your head, and you feel what's left of you slowly crumble into pieces. 

He wanted to see other people.

He didn't want this anymore.

He didn't want you anymore.

You try to rewind and think about every single moment you had shared with Minho— wondering where you went wrong and where you could've done better. None of this was your fault, but at the same time, everything felt like your fault.

Where could you have gone wrong?

"Cielo?" Through your silent cries, you hear Jisung scrambling outside of your door. He quickly shoves his shoes aside and swings the door open, his heart instantly dropping when he sees you crying on the floor. "Y/N, what's going on?" He worriedly asks as he drops down next to you, pulling you into his arms.

"He broke up with me."

"Minho?" Jisung furrows his brows, the anger rising within him. He knew Minho had been acting a little weird and distant lately, but he didn't think much of it. Maybe he should've, then he could've talked to him about what was going on in his mind. Find better ways to handle this.

But, you can never change someone's mind once they're set on it.

"It's Kat. He didn't say it, but I know it's her." Jisung sighs. Of course. It makes a little more sense. No wonder Kat had been around him a little more.  No wonder he seemed disconnected.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers onto your head as he continues to hold you close, letting you drench his shirt with your tears. "I'm so sorry he did this." He repeats. "Swear I'll kill him."

"No." You softly respond. "Don't."

"I hate that he hurt you." 

"H-He must really like her, doesn't he?" You pull back to look at Jisung and his heart shatters seeing you like this. The last time he's seen you this torn up was when your mom passed.

He knows you are hurting.

You hurt, and you hurt.

"I don't know, Y/N. I wish I knew more about this, but I'm in the dark as much as you are."

"He doesn't want me." Jisung lets out a breath before pulling you back towards him. "What did I do wrong?"

"Don't say that. Don't ever question yourself. None of this was your fault. He'll realize what a dumb fucking mistake this was." He rubs your arm. "He let go of someone great and that is his biggest loss."

"Jisung." You cry even harder and Jisung has no idea what else he could possibly do to alleviate the pain. He wishes he could take this way from you. "This hurts." You repeat. "This hurts so bad. Why didn't any of this matter to him? This hurts." You go on.

"I know. I'm sorry Y/N. I'm here." He hugs you tighter and rests his chin on the top of your head. "I'm here. We're gonna get you through this. You have me."

☁︎ END

⇢ read jisung's thoughts in 10.5: [cloudy days] here

♡ taglist: @ppiri-bahng @jihanlovic @meloncremesoda @sweetlikecherry @hoes4lino @skzddicted @skzho @edgaralienpoe @harui-zen @bestleeknowstan @havenwithleeknow @septicrebel @heesdazed @borahae-reads @yoontaethings @pearbunny @bintificreads @lukeys-giggle @ajxreads @everglowdaisies @allaboutsan @endzii23 @leeknowsramen @heres-your-ramen2000 @morningstardada @mal-lunar-28 @downbadreading @lilysophie @feelikecinderella @urmomma0324 @ddazed-lhs @djeniryuu @melanctton @i8rsie @maru-matt @sleepyleeji @taerifin @nattisbored @jisunglyricist @m111nho @drhsthl @nixtape-foryou @arminseas @guiltycoco @syuuji @sulkygyu @cadihyo @reianagarcia @leeknowyah @smndjdufuehr @dprkbyn @xxibreinaxx @mxnsxngie [bold = can’t tag 🥺]

[scuttlingcrab]

"The doublet is a magical item, so it can fit and mould to Raphael’s body no matter his form or temper." Now I'm just picturing Raphael transforming in anger while wearing the doublet and his rage is momentarily stopped when he realizes that it transformed with him and wasn't even singed.

Like, I could be incredibly angry with someone, but if I suddenly realized that my dress had pockets in it I know darn well that I'd need to at least stop and take a moment to marvel at that discovery before even thinking about continuing on with my anger. 😅

I was literally working on something similar when you sent your message! I've attached the ask below I was initially responding to. Thank you for your message anon and hope you enjoy! x

"Also, the idea of Raphael showing off his new clothes is just- It just tickles me! I can see him preening and flaunting like a peacock because of Tav's gift. I'd honestly read a sequel piece about that, if you want to write it. I've kinda already fallen in love with the whole idea of a luxury magic tailor Tav that the initial prompt fill and response has created as well as that Tav's potential dynamic with Raphael (and other characters *looking at Gale and his sewing needle quip*) and would absolutely be down to read more of that from you! 👀"

Summary: Raphael is caught off guard by his recent gift from Tav, so he decides to pay his little mouse a visit.

Notes: Read A Perfect Fit, which inspired this continuation.

Link to my other work in the Devil's Archive.

Dressed to Kill 

Raphael stomped through the halls of the House of Hope, shedding his mortal skin. The doublet didn’t set fire when Raphael transformed, instead, it morphed with his growing size. The silk fabric soothed his ridged body, feeling like a warm embrace. Raphael suppressed a scream. Wretched mortal! The debtors scurried out of his path like rats, seeking the shadows for an ounce of solace from the blistering rage. 

He passed an open window and jolted to a halt. The blood-red light of Avernus caught the designs of his doublet, causing it to glimmer like diamonds. During his shift, the colour of his clothing changed. It now had a dark golden shimmer, the infernal embroidery a deep blue. He extended his arm, admiring the sleeve as he twisted it only slightly, and watched as the adornment reflected tiny devilish patterns onto the marble floors. The decorations moved, as if dancing. Another interesting, subtle detail.

Staring at these animations, Raphael’s breath calmed, his mind cleared. He stood taller, his head never held so high. Abruptly he spotted one of the debtors staring at him from his peripheral and lowered his hand, slowly turning to face them. Fire burned in Raphael’s eyes as he hissed, barring his sharp teeth. The debtor screeched before scurrying off to continue their meaningless eternal task. 

“If I catch just one more incompetent lackey idling about, I will impale your sorry souls on trees and leave you to rot. You are all interchangeable. Do not forget that.”

Raphael watched as the last debtor fled from his sight. He will not be caught off guard again. No. In fact… he will pay that creature a visit. 

–

Raphael materialised at the creature's camp in a swirl of flames and sparks, returning to his mortal disguise. 

The camp was quiet at this hour, the creatures asleep, separated into their individual makeshift tents. And what a ghastly camp it was, third-rate, at best. Miscellaneous equipment littered every corner, books lay discarded, shoddy clothes hung drying on trees, and the animals… When did these mortals domesticate owlbears? Savages.  

He slowly approached Tav’s tent, nestled towards the lake's shoreline. He parted the flap with an index finger and peeked inside. The creature was fast asleep, sharing her tent with that monstrosity Karlach. 

He watched them sleeping, so defenceless. He perked up at the thought. If he was so inclined, he could have easily ended their lives, consumed their souls before the tadpoles defiled them; all it would take is a snap of his fingers…

“Rise and shine, little mouse.” Raphael purred. 

Tav sprang up from her bed roll, clumsily readying a dagger from her sleeve. She held it out towards Raphael, one eye still closed, as she fought off the interrupted slumber. 

Karlach simply turned over in her bedding, yawning and stretching like a cat. She slowly opened her eyes, sitting upright when she spotted Raphael standing at the entrance.

He smirked in response, placing a hand on his hip.

“What the hell is this creep doing here?”

“Good evening to you too, Karlach. I am simply checking in on my prospective clients.”

Raphael bowed deeply, making sure to be as flamboyant as possible in his gesture.

“In the middle of the bloody night? Fuck off, devil.” 

Raphael slowly straightened himself, adjusting his sleeves. He aimed his cuffs towards the campfire, taking care to make sure the lighting was just right to highlight the devilish decorations. 

“Tut, tut, Karlach, language. If I wanted to hear such hideous sounds I’d speak with a lemure.”

Karlach leapt to her feet, the rickety infernal engine in her chest glowing brighter as she stared daggers at him.

“Karlach, please…” 

Tav raised a hand at Karlach, putting away her weapon. She rubbed away the rest of the sleep and focused on Raphael. Her face instantly lit up when she caught sight of his doublet. 

“You’re… wearing it?” Tav whispered. She brought her hands to her mouth, attempting to hide her flushed cheeks. 

“But of course! How could I resist such a delicious gift? It’s not often a devil like myself comes across a mortal with such curious tastes. Your attention to detail is…”

Raphael dramatically clasped his hands together, as if in a prayer. Yes, indeed. Thank the Gods up above for damning these poor creatures and sending them straight into his claws. 

“Superb!” 

“Hells, what have you done?” Karlach groaned, rolling her eyes. “I told you it was a bad idea.”

Tav gave Karlach a sidelong glance, narrowing her eyes. Raphael’s smile grew, devouring the creature’s disapproval and embarrassment. Almost as scrumptious as a soul.

“You are quite the seamstress. What else have you been creating on your adventures, hmm? I wonder, what would be the price for another item such as this? Perhaps we can come to some sort of agreement?” 

Tav’s mouth hung open at his words.

“I-I-uh, didn’t think that far ahead. Let me sleep on it.”

“Don’t keep me waiting, little mouse. You had my curiosity, but now… you have my full attention.”

Raphael raised his arms out wide, like a peacock strutting their finest feathers. He laughed as he surrounded himself in infernal flames. He had truly stumbled upon his greatest prize, his secret weapon to uniting the Nine Hells. Raphael would reach his target soon, that was for certain, but oh, oh yes... he would look hellishly chic in his pursuits. He would turn heads, devils and mortals alike.

[moyokeansimblr]

Update

Not feeling so hot and I'm not going to do anything impulsive at 8PM on a Friday evening but

here is a link to a sfs folder with ALL of my content that's currently only hosted on patreon.

I want to add individual sfs links to the tumblr posts but that's a lot and I'm now regretting never adding alt dl links this whole time... and sorry I don't think the downloads in the sfs folder are in order... it also might be some other things, like fixed meshes or stuff. tbh I just added everything I've made after April 3rd 2023 since that was the last time I uploaded anything to sfs.

I guess while I'm here... I was going to wait until after I finish up the last of my active requests (probably by Monday, I'm almost done) but I desperately need a break from CC. I sent a group message on the 17th to my $4 and $6 patrons encouraging them to cancel, but I know not everybody knows patreon even has dms so maybe you'll see this post and I'll reach out again in the coming days so nobody is wasting their money. I am so immensely burnt out and I need to not create for a while. This is completely my own fault, nobody made me work on CC for 8-10 hours 5 days a week for the last several months and I fully knew it wasn't sustainable ages ago but I kept doing it because it made me feel good, until it didn't. Quite honestly, even before I sent the group message the instant wave of relief I felt just having made the decision to take a break... that caught me off guard but just confirmed I need this. I do feel really awful about it because I feel like I'm letting people down but at the same time I don't want to hate creating which was already happening. That being said, I don't know how long the lull in CC is going to be, and if you're only following me strictly for CC I apologize. As said I am still finishing up one request I still had, I'm about 75% done with that as of this post. But that's gonna be it for a while.

There is a part of me that wants to stop using patreon completely and unpublish my creator page (which is what I'm not going to impulsively do tonight without properly thinking it through...since there are positives like how easy it is to download files and whatnot) but I'd again encourage not only those who joined the $4 and $6 tiers but also the $2 tier to cancel so that you aren't wasting your money. If I did do this I would definitely do the individual sfs links on everything first. I'd not just leave you guys unable to download my stuff.

So, what does that mean for this blog? I'll spare ye, impatient readers, who have already read a lot because I ramble⬇️

Well, as of posting this I still have THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FOUR Strangetown posts in my queue. And I'm not tired of playing that.

I'm looking forward to having an opportunity to do all of the things I've been neglecting. I'm finally going to go through the subfolder within my downloads of everything I'm downloaded the last few months and decide if I wanna keep it in my game or not. And finish default replacing everything. And all my other various little projects I haven't been doing.

Also, I want to start playing Veronaville 😮I've already started downloading lots from kattaty to replace the in-game ones, and I found a cool replacement for the neighborhood map. I am leaning towards making a new sub-blog for this so that you don't have to try and follow Strangetown/LFT posts and Veronaville/ALT posts at the same time. I've only ever played the Veronaville sims for like one day as part of a super failed megahood years ago so I'd like to get to know them.

So basically, I guess I'm a gameplay blog for now? Until I want to create anything again anyways, but I don't know when that will be.

I don't know how to end this post... I'm sorry for the disappointment, but thank you so much for enjoying my stuff 💛💛

[creatureheart]

hi! forgive me for bringing up an old post out of nowhere, moreso if youve already answered this question before (in which case feel free to just link your answer!) you made a really good post back in april explaining some alterhuman/nonhuman/etc labels and explaining some general facets of it like how it can develop involuntarily - in that post you say thar some people may experience being nonhuman physically or ancestrally and i was wondering what that means in this context? i hope this doesnt come across as rude or anything, im genuinely curious what this means and was hoping you could explain. thanks for taking the time to read either way. ❤️

Never feel bad for sending in questions. I’m always down to try my best at answering them when they’re sent in, but I cannot promise I know everything, and those that fall into these groups are welcome to chime in and correct me when needed!

To what you asked, in basic terms, it’s what it says on the tin. There are people who identify in a physical or ancestral way.

Some identify as their ‘types in all ways including physical. This may be due to the simple mindset of “this is my body, I am this thing, therefore this body is this thing’s body,” all the way to those who experience delusions that cause them to see themselves as physically their ‘type. It very much depends on the person and how they experience their nonhumaness. Some terms that refer to things like this are Holothere and Endel, but there are others!

Ancestral nonhumans are those who believe their nonhuman identity has been passed down through familial lineage. An example being some of the founders of the online Otherkin community who believed they were descended from Elves. I can’t say I know too much about this, but it again depends entirely on the individual as to how their family came to pass this down to their descendants — whether something like a curse, to it having always been that way.

While not the most informative, I hope this is a good start at finding information on these things, and I welcome anyone that falls into these groups to reblog and talk about their experiences.

[fuckyeah-beringandwellsfics]

Hi! I'm not new to Myka and Helena, I remembered them from the 2010s and now watched the show just for them, but I am new to Myka and Helena fanfiction.

Do you know any more fics like this https://archiveofourown.org/works/957200?view_adult=true or vaguely like this?

Is there a big masterlist of good Myka and Helena fics? I've been reading through their tag on AO3, but there are 1600+ fics 😯 so it'll take me a while to read them. I'd like to read some good ones.

Hi and thank you for asking, anon! That fic is great, isn't it! (clickable version of the written-out link anon sent: Resigned to These Histories (We Exist) by journaliar/@snake-juice)

Anon, as far as I am aware, there is no *one* big masterlist.

Several people in this fandom have made their own rec lists over time, of course, from the very beginning. (The older they are, unfortunately, the higher the chance that some links might not work anymore, but you can still try them out!) I have a "fic rec" tag on my main blog (linked in case you want to know the source; that tag contains other fics too, not just Bering and Wells, but all of them femslash), and here are some Bering and Wells specific lists that I've found going through it:

styrofoamtokyo's list, from 2014

tracybering's list of Tracy Bering friendly fics and art, also from 2014

lonely-night's lists from 2017 and 2018

wibblywobblyida's list from 2021

There's also the Ballet AU, a collaboration with multiple fics and pieces of art, from several of this fandom's best authors and artists; highly recommended, masterpost here.

I'm sure there are more fic rec lists slumbering on people's blogs! So here's my call to anyone who sees this post: please link yours!

I myself am trying to assemble recs on an individual basis. Almost a year ago, I tried to make a list of what has been already recommended through this post, but now that is way out of date, of course.

Beyond these lists, the usual tips for AO3 and Tumblr apply (under a readmore for length):

when you found a fic you liked, click on the author's name and see what else they've written for the ship/fandom, see if you like those too

check if that author's bookmarks are public; those are fics that they liked, and maybe you'll like them too

and then with those fics, you can go to *those* authors' profiles and see what else *they* have written - and so on.

Don't forget to bookmark and/or download these fics so that you can find them again. You need to have a user profile yourself to bookmark fics (and that's not the only advantage; I highly recommend it - and remember, you can set your bookmarks to private if you want).

also, please please consider leaving kudos and comments on fics that you've liked - a lot of authors are still active in the fandom/for the ship, and kudos and comments always help us *stay* active, because they tell us that people still enjoy what we create. Even if the specific fic in question is from the early days of the fandom, kudos and comments are always welcome.

same goes for reblogs on Tumblr, be it the above lists, individual fic rec posts, or posts from the authors themselves with or about their stories.

some authors with a Tumblr blog also have a dedicated "my fics" tag or link on those blogs. Always worth clicking through from an individual Tumblr post to the author's blog, and seeing if something like that is on it - and if the author is still actively writing, consider giving them a follow (and reblogging their fic posts; I've heard from so many authors that their fic posts barely get any reblogs at all to spread the word)

I hope that all or at least some of these tips are helpful to you, Anon - there is a lot of great stuff out there, and you're right, it can be a bit daunting to figure out where to start. And hey, it's always okay to click back out of a fic you find you don't like. No harm no foul, even if the fic came recommended; everyone's taste is different! There is no "required reading" that you *have* to have done to be a fan. You already are, no matter how many fics you've read!

[popfizzles]

💚×××💗

Hi guys!! This is going to be a long one!

Now, first things first, if you didn't know, I run an Etsy shop with my sibling @kittyacelia!

We're starting to branch out the things that we sell and offer (like jewelery, pay-to-use bases, and acrylic charms) but the thing we started with, and arguably the thing we are most known for, are Comfort Character Boxes and Letters!

You can receive a box full of snacks, beauty-care, and feel-good items--everything inside is catered to YOUR interests, as you will fill out a form after purchasing! Each box also comes with a letter and a sticker of the character you chose! The idea is that it will feel like your favorite character will have sent you the box themselves! We've got a short list of fandoms that we're very passionate about, and if you're ALSO passionate about some of the same stuff that we post, we would love to work with you! We work our very best to make sure everything is as in-character as possible, so we try to stick to things that we know. If you don't see your fandom listed, please feel free to send a message to the Etsy shop and double check before purchasing! We just restocked in time for the December holidays! You can buy our boxes for any occasion (birthdays, pick-me-ups, or if you're just feeling like getting a nice treat for yourself), but if you're looking to guarantee your box or letter arrives in time before the New Year, you should definitely purchase it now!! Our boxes have an estimated turnaround time of 10 weeks, and last year we had some weather trouble and got snowed in. So, better safe than sorry! There's also no issue with purchasing a box as a present for someone else; just know that you will have to fill out a form full of info on their behalf if you'd like to keep it a surprise (so be prepared to answer some questions like "what's your favorite color/animal/candy/etc." and "do you have any allergies we should know about?") [If you're interested in taking a look at the sizes of boxes we offer, you can click here to look at the listings we have in stock!]

SECONDLY;

We're having one last call on our Sticker Blowout Sale!

Any stickers that you see listed on our shop at this moment will be the last time they're listed individually (and with free shipping to the United States) like this! If you are interested in any of the characters listed, now would be the time to buy them!! If you don't, you will not see them again for a VERY LONG TIME unless you buy a box or a letter. Once January hits, we will be totally rebranding and cleaning our shop page so it's more cohesive, uniform, and easy to navigate! This will also include starting to add sticker packs, where you can choose to buy individual character stickers from a listing, or purchase a large batch of them at a discount! BUT this means that we will not be listing stickers until we have a large amount of them finished for one fandom, which will likely take a while, doing extra character stickers when we have time away from the boxes and letters. So again, you have until January 1st to buy the rest of the stickers listed on our shop. After that, any leftovers will be removed from the store, and will not return until we have large amounts of them finished. They'll be listed permanently by fandom in batches at that point! [To take a look at what stickers we have left from our Blowout Sale, you can click this link!]

And, as always, thank you all SO MUCH for the continued support.

We love our job, being able to bring people so much happiness!! We're ready to keep on delivering gifts to you from your favorite characters, and we're looking forward to bringing you so much more than that in the future!!

💗×××💚

[messrsrarchives]

Heyyy You explain these things in ways I can actually understand is it insensitive to ask about the blocker ban? And I hope you haven't been affected by any of it and that you are okay 💖💖💖

HI !! i'm gonna be so honest and say that my initial response was going to be that i can't. and,,, i can't really.

but the corner feels really empty at the moment. which,,, i know it's not. but it's really fucking lonely both in and out of this space to be trans right now so i'm gonna make this corner mine 🙂↕️ let's talk about it.

to preface - it's so much deeper than everything below. it's,,, i haven't been hurt by the ban of puberty blockers but since they've made it indefinite, i've been taken off of all care. from my seizures to my mental health to even just "if i broke my leg right now, where the fuck do i go???". which,,, fucking sucks init. i thought maybe it was just a Me thing and i'd gotten unlucky with my gp, but all bar one of my trans friends have been taken off of everything. so,,, not directly no. but this isn't just an attack on Trans Healthcare, this is an attack on trans people receiving any healthcare. oh and they changed my name back to my deadname on the database without telling me. so that's. something.

yeah. it fucking sucks. eloquent, i know but idk. no words for it really and you've sent this at 4am which is prime crying time so 🫂🫂 thank you for checking in 🫂🫂

but now that the sob session is over, onto the important things:

THE BASICS:

puberty blockers: used to postpone puberty, once taken off of these puberty proceeds as normal.

these are not predominately a form of trans healthcare and can be used for: early onset puberty (affects v roughly 1 in 5-10,000), endometriosis (growth of uterine lining, incredibly painful condition), some forms of cancer - and some other things but these are the most common uses

these have been used commonly since the 80s to treat such things with no question in regards to their safety (because, spoiler alert: this isn't actually about the safety of them, it's about transphobia)

the ban only applies to gender dysphoria cases: note here, at the time of the original ban only 83 cases of this were being prescribed. more cis people were on them than trans people.

to clarify, in case it wasn't clear how blatant the transphobia is: puberty blockers do not function differently on trans people. healthcare does not discriminate, the system does.

TIMELINE:

MARCH 2024: nhs england decides that blockers will no longer be routine treatment for gender dysphoria

APRIL 2024: final cass report released -> more below but this was a review into gender identity services for under-18s, written by someone who hates trans people,,, i'm sure that won't be biased at all ! /s

MAY 2024: previous tory government tightens this and introduces an "emergent temporary ban" (those already on the drug are allowed to continue)

JULY 2024: labour gov comes into power and keep it in place. law is challenged in the high court, government wins.

AUGUST 2024: "temporary" ban extended again

NOW: wes streeting (health secretary) has made this indefinite with a review in 2027.

EXTRA DETAILS:

this comes from "expert advice" including the Cass Report. i'll link a review by Stonewall Scotland here but the general synopsis is that this is written by a terf who did not communicate with trans individuals, has no fucking clue what actually happens, and is completely fucking wrong about everything. government (both previous and current) approve this review 😄👍🏼 -PSSTTT so does jkr, she said she felt "vindicated" by this)

there are planned clinical trials by the nhs into the use of puberty blockers (will these happen? who knows! will they be fair? absolutely not, the nhs started this and have been cutting their trans services for fucking ages)

backed by Sex Matters (incrediblyyy transphobic organisation and PSSSTTTT jkr is connected to them! anyway :3 here's a quote from them -> "It marks another step towards puberty blockers being relegated to a shameful chapter of history, in which parents and health professionals were emotionally blackmailed into harming children in the name of 'progress'."

this here is a response from Trans Actual -> note, this is from the august extension, i'm unsure if they've responded to the indefinite ban yet.

there's most definitely more but i've spent too long looking at my google doc. i hope this helped explain it a little !!

it's all incredibly baseless with no evidence of the harm these "cause", but plenty of evidence on the harm the ban causes. it's blatant transphobia no matter how much they phrase it as "protecting kids"

[xclowniex]

have you seen this video talking about why Hasan is bad?

https://youtu.be/xcZvHbrUNQI?si=88u2l6m8sqMju2Wl

Thank you so much for sharing anon. I have just watched the video and holy shit it worded every critique i have with hasan amazingly.

I recommend everyone to watch the video even if you don't care about Hasan as a lot of the criticisms made about him is very indicative of the extreme anti zionists crowd as a whole and not just Hasan even though the creator was focusing on Hasan solely.

There is also a longer video referenced in the video sent by the anon (here) which I recommend people watch as well.

The video from anon linked here, is by Tom Dark and goes into why Hasan's debating, journalism and overall political streams are dogshit and how he is problematic.

To summarize both videos, they go into how he can't debate for shit, automatically jumps to insults, is transphobic and a rape apologist and how he can't report for shit.

Again, I highly encourage everyone to watch both videos. They are amazing and very well done.

Something which wasn't super touched on in either video which I want to talk about it how he interjects himself into intra-community discussions as an authority and throws a tanty when called out.

This was mentioned in both videos about a trans person calling him out and he then is transphobic, but recently (after both videos were made so obviously weren't touched on in either video) is that he makes himself an authority on jew being white.

Which is like crazy to me since he's Turkish and used to live in Turkey. Some Turkish folk consider themselves to be arab and some consider themselves to be white. I'm not Turkish so I'm not going to make a decision for every Turkish person on if they're arab or European. I'm gonna recognize how there are multiple opinions and leave it up to individual Turkish folk to make that decision for themselves. Same with Egypt! Some Egyptians consider themselves arab and some African. I'm not gonna weigh in on that. I'm gonna leave it to the individual Egyptian person to make that decision for themselves as it's not my place.

I guess the main point of that is Hasan never knows his place! Despite telling people who disagree with him that "they need to know their place"

Hasan also refuses to acknowledge Jewish history when pointed out to him and considering that and his attempt at claiming jews are white, he is properly antisemitic.

I 100% think that his antisemitism influences his opinion on Israel and the war. There is no way that it's not.

Hasan is not a good person and needs to address all of his bad behavior.

[bekkathyst]

Hey everyone! This post is for those who have messaged me about their tracking number for an older order showing an error; please read this post for all the info! Also I’ll preface the whole explanation by saying please don’t worry or panic, your order is still on its way as expected and nothing is seriously wrong.

The way shipping works is that I generate the customs forms at home and print them out. This form is just for exporting/importing purposes, it’s not actually the shipping label since the Austrian post doesn’t let small businesses print those at home (the rant I could write about that…)

So I put all the customs forms on the packages, and add the customs form number into Shopify and you get a shipping notification with that number. Then I drop them off at the post office, the wonderful ladies there make all the shipping labels for the packages and then I pay for everything and the packages go on their way.

Previously, after that, my job would be done because the system would automatically connect the customs form number with the new actual tracking number and it would update the link in Shopify automatically.

Unfortunately, the Austrian post has once again changed in a way that hurts small businesses, because now they have made all the customs forms numbers unsearchable in the system and therefore impossible to connect to the new tracking numbers. So basically I have just found out that at least 50+ tracking emails I’ve sent out to people are functionally useless.

Now, when I do pay for the packages I get a super long receipt with all the tracking numbers listed. When I type in and search each tracking number individually, I can see what zip code they’re being sent to, so I can search the recent orders and figure out which tracking number belongs to who. As you can imagine, this is an incredibly tedious task, but it’s now something I’ll have to spend time doing after every batch is dropped off at the post office until either the Austrian post fixes their system or I can finally convince them to give me a merchant account with them so I can just print the labels myself at home.

This is truly frustrating but I will manage and figure it out. And the good news is that packages are still being delivered fine and everything, there’s no issue with delivery, but for the packages that take a little longer than the others (as there always are some with every batch) not being able to track the package will obviously make one nervous!

So please rest assured if you’ve messaged or emailed me with this issue, I will spend some hours tomorrow looking through my old receipts and finding your tracking number for you.

I’m so sorry for any worry this is causing but your order should still arrive soon and I will get back to your message/email tomorrow 😊

Thank you!

[curlybraceyourself]

Fan mail #1

Once again, do not harass any of the individuals discussed in this post. Particularly in this instance, where several persons mentioned have expressed a desire to no longer be involved in Lily-Critical discourse.

I thought I should take a moment to respond to this comment, left on the blog's primary post:

@queenvaleriapple , thank you for your inquiry. Wondering why a blog such as this exists is a reasonable question. As this response will involve multiple images, we have chosen to respond in post form.

It is true that Sai has an alt-account for purposes of posting about Lily Orchard. However, and this is a critical difference:

Sai's alt account is not used for purposes of anonymity. Quite simply, Sai posts on this alt so that the majority of her fans (who have little to no interest in Lily-Critical material) can ignore that stuff while still engaging with her art posts.

Linking Taffer and Curly-B did strip Taffer of one layer of anonymity, but her ability to comment on elements of the Lily-Critical community was in no way compromised. Taffer/Curly is welcome to continue providing commentary and art criticism (to those who would like to receive it), as long as she is willing to accept the consequences of doing so. More importantly, as she has now expressed a desire to not be involved in this discourse any further, I will be honoring her request from hereon and encourage any viewers to do the same.

You could argue that (for lack of a better, gender-neutral term) there should be a gentleman's agreement in these spaces- "Don't harass or start discourse with fans of Lily orchard, except where those persons instigate discourse themselves". If someone says they don't want to be involved, then don't involve them. If someone is not involved, do not involve them (which Taffer violated when she involved CelestialAlpacaron into the mix). And critically, if someone tries to leave the arena, for gods' sakes, do not drag them back in with you.

Which brings me to my next point:

I find it curious that you would bring up EredWolliw on Curly's Blog. For the record, EredWolliw is a young artist who, two weeks ago, responded to two posts about Lily orchard. They received harassment for those responses, and then stated their intent to stop posting about the subject:

Since that point, you, Queenvaleriapple, have persistently harassed this person and accused them of stalking Lily when they have done no such thing. You have thrown unwarranted shade on their artwork and accused them of racism for... having complex POC characters?

It's not unreasonable to assume that your above ask, sent to Curly-B, was an attempt to get Curly-B involved in this harassment as well.

This behaviour, quite frankly, is abhorrent. I strongly, strongly urge you to cease this inexplicable crusade, and to reflect on your behaviour. Do not engage people in drama, when said people have made every reasonable effort to step away from it.

Once again, thank you for your inquiry.

[mogai-headcanons]

[if alt text is not accessible for you, every image in this post is a thin teal line divider.]

welcome to my blog!

i'm dexter, and you can find more information about me here. i'm 23 and i mainly use he/him, ey/em, and it/its pronouns, but any other pronouns that are not she or they are good too!

i also run @neopronouns, a mogai/liom term/flag request blog, and @neopornouns, an 18+ mogai/liom term/flag request blog, and my main blog is @pierz.

please read my dni before following me and read my general rules and blog rules before requesting!

my requests are currently open for stuff from my whitelist and here is every request currently in my inbox. my queue currently posts 1 time daily at noon cst.

here's a quick list of frequently asked questions — i recommend you look through this before asking me a question, since i get a lot of asks and may ignore yours if it's answered here!

q: what program do you use to make your edits and how? a: i use gimp on desktop! here's a basic flag splicing tutorial for multi-flag icons and a video of my edit-making process (though it's only the main gimp screen, not the menus i'm using)

q: what's your header/icon? a: my header is a compilation of edits from over the course of my blog and my icon is sunburst from 'my little pony: friendship is magic' over the excemelle flag!

q: are you alright with requests involving [insert media]? a: if it's not in my general rules linked above, probably yes! if you're concerned for a specific reason (source content, shitty creator, etc.) please let me know in your ask; i don't know what's problematic about every piece of media!

q: how many characters can i send in one request? how many terms? a: as many as you want, within reason! i’ve currently managed to fit 95 characters into one post and 245 flags into one icon, and though i do like a challenge, i’d prefer that no individual icon in a request have more than 200ish flags and that you stick to 50ish characters! those are flexible numbers though.

q: i don't see my request in the inbox! can i resend it? a: yes! just resend it and let me know that you sent it previously while requests were open.

q: i forgot something in my request, want to add extra details, want to change certain details, or want to remove certain details! a: send me an ask letting me know what request is yours and what you want changed and i'll do that!

q: can you tag [insert thing]? a: yes, i'll try my hardest to remember?

q: can i use one of your edits somewhere? a: yes, and i would strongly prefer if you credit me somewhere if you do.

q: are you alright with spam likes/reblogs? a: yes, and i appreciate your support and enthusiasm!

q: [insert headcanon] that you posted goes against a canon identity! a: thank you for letting me know! i don’t want to post things that erase already existing representation. i may ask for sources to verify if i can’t find some on my own.

q: [insert headcanon] goes against [insert thing in your rules]! a: again, thank you for letting me know! i don’t always know the sources i get requests for and tend to assume that people won’t send in things that go against the rules, so i don’t usually check.

q: can i submit art for you to use for [source without canon art]? a: yes! i’m happy to use your own art or art from an artist who is alright with their work being used with credit (including picrews). a2: this also applies to the adventure zone (since i only don’t do requests for it due to problematic canon art), aus (such as homestuck bloodswaps, etc), and similar situations!

q: [insert nice thing] a: i cherish you so much and your ask probably will sit in my inbox forever along with all the other incredibly sweet asks i've received over the course of this blog!

q: [discourse] a: please Do Not.

[phoebe-delia]

Eight Drarry Nights 2023 Masterlist

And that's a wrap on Eight Drarry Nights 2023! Thanks to everyone who sent in a prompt, and those who read the fics!

You can now read the collection of this year's fics on AO3. Tumblr posts of individual fics are linked below:

I Watched It Begin Again

When He Gets Home

Here's to Us

Swear to be Overdramatic and True

One single thread of gold tied me to you

A Day, or Forever

tryin' to hold on to the memory of your lips

Drunk on Jealousy

[the-cheapskateler-show]

“We interrupt this broadcast to bring you a very important message…”

((Everything beyond this point is out of character!!))

Hello everyone, Cheapmod here! Many of you reading this probably have not met me, so hello! Nice to meet you! 👋 You can call me Py if you’d like!

Right off the bat, I just want to make sure nobody worries since this post got kinda long. Here’s the gist of it!: Cheap’s blog is going to be continuing! It has not ended, and it won’t be for some time. I want to thank you all for sticking around and giving this blog so much love, and I encourage you to seek out additional askblogs you would enjoy cause there are many out there to love!

Okay with that out of the way, some further context for that and other things I just wanted to take the chance to say while I’m speaking out of character.

First, Im so sorry to anybody who’s been worried about Cheap, the state of this blog or me. I promise, we are both okay and this blog is continuing!

I just took an unanounced break from ALL my projects to focus on approaching art and writing more healthily. I was on break for longer than I thought I might be but I have not stopped thinking of Cheap and all of you out there. I am planning on returning to bring Cheap back to everyone soon! As a heads up, I will be experimenting more with the art style for this blog just to see if I can make things a little more quick and fun for myself!

As for the esteemed host of the show, Cheap is doing just fine! Nothing has happened to him since the last update. I would like to note that the real life passage of time will not always affect him. I will need to take breaks like this every now and then for my own sake and other priorities. If that happens, we will generally pick up right where we left off! I’ve also got many fun and interesting things planned for this blog, so I couldn’t possibly stay away for too long!

Now for something very important…you guys!!

I cannot thank you all enough for the incredible reception Cheap has recieved!! It means so much more to me than I can possibly express in words and seeing every last bit of it has really warmed my heart 🥺 Thats why its very important that I come back and make sure all the wonderful questions, comments and compliments you’ve sent in are responded to and addressed in time!!

As WELL I am so delighted that I have been seeing some incredible pieces of fanart from you guys!!!! I REALLY want to thank you each individually as i have been doing so far!! The reason I haven’t said anything yet about any fanart is because I want to give each one the dedicated attention it deserves!!! And that will be coming soon and coming first with the continuation of the little intermission we started on for giving these works a highlight!

All fanmade creations will be tagged as: #viewer-art-showcase! and I encourage everyone to check out the pieces there and especially the artists behind them!! I will be providing a link to this tag for easy access in blog description soon after this post goes up.

Another thing I’d like to mention before I wrap up here is I am posting this on an significant day for Cheap! On this day, Nov. 26th 11 years ago, I started Cheap’s first blog! With some hiatuses and pauses in-between, Cheap will have been around for 11 years. I can hardly believe it! I’m very happy to be running his blog again with this little revival here and Im so happy I made a character who has had a chance to develop so much and endured as one of my favorite OCs. It is in large part thanks to all the support and attention he’s received through all these years across all his blogs that I bring him to you all today and im so grateful to all new and longterm fans. I hope you will all continue to enjoy Cheap’s shenanigans as much as I do! Thank you!!

Lastly, I just want to encourage everyone reading this to check out ANY of the other ask-blogs that Cheap interacts with on here! I realized its not very easy to visit these blogs due to the way i’m answering asks with screenshots, so I will go back and provide @ mentions and links to previous posts.

But better yet, there are SO many awesome askblogs out there to discover well outside his blog so make sure you don’t miss them!! A great place to check out is the #lerkimpails tag for new and returning askblogs! If there are any other newer specific tags for askblogs in use that you know of, feel free to drop those in the replies of this post-im still a bit of a fandom oldie here… heh heh.

There are so many creative askblogs out there to discover and meet and they can all always use more attention and asks. This fandom and even this little corner of it are what they are because of the collective efforts of everyone on this platform inspiring and supporting one another, so be sure to make others feel welcome and appreciated and just go enjoy what they have to offer!!

Thank you everyone for reading this far! I mostly want to leave the hosting on this blog to Cheap, so there wont be many OOC posts like this, unless theres anything i really gotta clarify. Still, you will find me around in the tags now and then for sure. 🦋✨

We will get this show a-rolling again real soon! Hope to see you all then!

Cheapmod-Py