#thank you for coming to my crack talk

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Since I got a new car (god it took forever) and I love it very much (325 a month make me wanna cry and die but I will grovel for hours at work) I will now make a crack post of where I would put the skz members in my 2018 Dodge Journey. (I recommend a quick google of the car in case you dont know what it looks like just so you understand the seating placements)

In The Third Row

Changbin and Hannie :

1. They’re quite short (lovingly and respectfully), and there is absolutely no leg room in the third row. I feel like they could ball themselves up and still be pretty comfortable during a short-medium length trip. Any trip longer than an hour, I will make pit stops to let them get out and walk around and stretch their legs.

2. They are loud (lovingly and respectfully). I am a panicky driver, and sudden loud noises will cause me to swerve and then boom, accident.

3. Again, they are quite short so they won’t block my view of the rear window. :)

4. It’s only a two seater row, so they wouldn’t be squishing some poor dude between their massive muscles. I’m doing the other members a favor.

The Middle Row

Felix, Seungmin, and Jeongin :

1. Seungmin has to sit in the middle, mainly because as much as I think he’d pretend to hate it, he’d probably have more fun that way. (Plus theres a power adapter and he can plug in his Nintendo Switch)

2. Seungmin also seems like the type to kick the back of the driver seat in the drive thru of McDonalds if I forget his mcnuggets and I ain’t about to deal with that.

3. Jeongin and Felix might be a bit chaotic, but I feel like they wouldn’t be as loud and one look through the rearview mirror would have them looking like 🥺

4. Going off the SKZ in Jeju skz code, Jeongin and Felix car karaoke would be so fun honestly. Seungmin might not be too happy about the two singing beside him but that’s what the 20 pc mcnuggets are for.

The Passenger Seat

So this one was tough to decide on, buuuuuut

Hyunjin :

1. I don’t think he’d be as intimidating to drive with as Bangchan or Minho who are also licensed drivers. He actually seems pretty chill tbh.

2. I know he’d be the absolute best car DJ. I trust him 100% with the aux cord.

3. Definitely does not seem like the type to steal the fries out of the Mcdonalds bag and eat them while I find a spot to pull over and then give everyone else the half empty boxes while keeping the full one for himself. (I see Jeongin doing that, that’s why he’s in the middle row)

4. He just seems like the best one to have a passenger. Once the rest of the dudes calm down or zonk out, he could probably have some pretty nice conversations too, especially if it were late at night driving on the highway and he’s trying his best to help you stay awake. 10/10 best passenger.

[makerofmadness]

ok so what the hell is the legal drinking age in earthbread man like. So I was thinking I would finally have to take the L on the "how fudging old is Alchemist Cookie" thing because Witch's Castle has that side story where she botches an experiment and it basically causes her to act like her brother. Including the alcoholism. (Tbh it is like my favorite special story in the game like part of that is 'cus of favorite character bias but also it ends really sweetly like WC is just really good for grape siblings fans in general they get a lot of content-). So I was like "okay then she has to be at least 19 if we assume the drinking age would line up with the real world/country the game is from. I can take an L I thought she was younger than that but I was wrong" BUT THEN FOR GINGERBRAVE'S BIRTHDAY WE GET THIS:

WIZARD IS A CONFIRMED CHILD THO????

Basically this is like really ancient shxt but like there was something called I think the Junior Cookie Challenge once where basically 9 kid characters gave you missions and WIZARD WAS ONE OF THEM

This is the picture I could find but like. Yeah Wizard's definitely a kid then. (I think this event happened before certain characters were even a thing including Alchemist when I checked the dates so like I have no idea if the characters were like limited for a reason or if this was all the kid characters in the game at the time but regardless I'm. Fubkign. Top 10 questions science can't answer Number 1: how fubkign old is Alchemist Cookie- like I'm guessing she just wasn't designed with a particular age in mind let's be real here-)

but like.

If Wizard can drink then like what is the legal drinking age on Earthbread man like-??????????

EDIT: I looked at the dates wrong/was thinking of when Alchemist existed in Ovenbreak I think and not in LINE (Alchemist was released like years before this event I think)... but then I ran into SOMETHING ELSE that throws a wrench in the works and by that I mean:

so DEVIL COOKIE ALSO existed before this event and yet was excluded but they're like. Really obviously a kid ESPECIALLY as of Witch's Castle (fudging. Three words: Crayon Doodle Set [literally their room decor includes a set of fudging crayola or some shxt like. I think it's obvious what impression we're supposed to get of them like obviously I don't think crayons should be locked off to only kids but like traditionally they're kinda thought of like a kids thing and Devil isn't like. Artistic-themed so to inexplicably have them... you can tell what's being communicated y'know?-) (and like I think Devil being the same age as Angel kinda. Is obvious-).

So the Junior challenge thing pretty much confirms nothing as to which characters AREN'T kids. Just which characters ARE kids. Frickin' almost had it and then lost it again-

Edit again: I also discovered that. Cream Puff existed during the time the Junior Cookie Challenge ran. And yet she wasn't in that. But now they're running kinda a sequel to that in Kakao Cookie Run and she's in THAT. So basically yeah it was never exhaustive 100% frickin' I'm going insane I'm having like two people debating with me (peacefully thankfully) over if Wizard's not actually drinking something alcoholic but like what is he drinking we don't know it could be anything but like he has a wine glass they could've given him a normal glass but they gave the kid a wine glass and we all have to suffer the consequences they didn't even put like a bowl of fruit punch on the table or anything just to say "haha he's just drinking this don't worry he's just a silly little guy :3" no they left the door wide open for us to at least ASSUME if it's not CONFIRMED by this that he's fudging destroying his nonexistent liver at the ripe old age of Child idk it's 2:22am as of me writing this

Too many edits: I need like a dedicated guide on what juice is and isn't meant to be alcohol in this universe because apparently the wizard art is like a reused asset from something about Hollyberry so like. But I know at least half the juice there is treated like alcoholic shxt too looking at some of the dialogue or like I'm mainly thinking of like wildberry's dialogue I think so. frickin'

another thing I realize is that. Alchemist drinking was because her personality got altered she wasn't like In Public. And... look I love Vampire but he isn't like the most responsible guy let's be real and like. Frickin' even can I just get like whether or not she has a diploma or anything please just anything like... ok I know that old as hell personality quiz calls her a "picky model student" so she's probably still in school but like where in school is she is she in high school of college or like. I would've placed her around cream puff's age before all of this but I don't know anymore y'know can someone help me?????- (she probably just wasn't designed with one in mind I'm doing all of this for nothing this is the definition of insanity frickin'-)

FINAL EDIT HOPEFULLY: ok I finally have an answer just like after talking to my bigger cr nerd friend uh. Basically the I Want You Every Day music video gives us definite footage of children drinking:

Screenshots courtesy of @void-the-bear (said friend)

Gingerbrave and Cream Puff are drinking the exact same drinks as the adults and these drinks literally look the same as what Sparkling holds in his goddamn sprites

Like you can see the bubbles in some shots it's the same drink it's frickin' champagne-but-we-can't-call-it-that-because-it's-a-kid's-game

But like there is an official short of Sparkling like. Not being able to serve Custard III I think because he's too young???? So uh.

basically the drinking age in Earthbread is "younger than Gingerbrave but older than Custard III" thank you for coming to my TED Talk (fudging. Finally have an answer though at least I think please tell me they didn't try to call this lemonade or something somewhere not the lemonade anything but the lemonade don't make me have a headache again PLEASE-)

[irisopranta]

I just want to share an absolute crack theory Gulool Ja Ja and Zoraal Ja

So hear me out here. We don't know who is Zoraal Ja's mom, right. My thought is that the gate to the golden city totally impregnated Gulool Ja Ja to create Zoraal Ja. Likewise, I think that Zoraal Ja was impreganted by the gate to create Gulool Ja.

[ratwars]

If the PM had somehow been the primary target of all of these plots instead of the ADA I firmly believe half of the situations could have been solved with Kajii. I understand he isn't popular but listen there is a reason he is who they pull out first with a hat trick when shit gets real.

[good-beanswrites]

Hear me out:

Kotoko adopted Es, and Fuuta went ballistic.

Rip Fuuta... he can never catch a break... Asdfsdf thank you for this, it was a blast thinking of all the ridiculous ways this could have played out! (One possibility I toyed with was Fuuta's competitive instincts take over, he fights her for Es, only to realize too late "*I* don't want to be responsible for a whole child WAIT") It's a similar format to the last one, with a knock-at-the-door reveal, but I still think it works 😂

“Don’t fuck with me, Es.”

“I would never.”

Lying brat. Fuuta knew they would every chance that they got. It was the reason he was so relieved that Es decided to find somewhere else to live after Milgram’s end. Fuuta had nothing left to fear from his former warden, but the others’ suggestions that Es become his new roommate still made him shudder. Three interrogations in a closed space with the rude kid were enough for him, thank you very much.

However, it wasn’t all a relief. He couldn’t help feeling concerned about who they’d gone to live with. Given how cryptic they were being, Fuuta would have been convinced they walked into the woods to find a furry family of Jackalopes or something to raise them –except, they showed up for this walk with clean clothing and internet access. 

“I don’t believe you. You’re fucking with me right now. Why can’t you just tell me who it is?” 

“It isn’t any of your concern. Hey, I thought you swore to stay out of others’ business. You turned over a new leaf and all that?”

“Tch. I meant other people’s business. You’re different.” 

If Es had vanished off the grid like some of the other prisoners, Fuuta wouldn’t have cared. But they were here, near enough to arrange some lame meetup, which meant they were going to remain in his life for a while longer. And that meant, as the model citizen that Fuuta was, he felt responsible for ensuring they didn’t get themselves kidnapped by some creep. 

He asked, “how much do you know about them, anyway? I mean, what kind of person can house a random weird kid on incredibly short notice? That’s definitely suspicious.”

Fuuta pulled the mask up on his face as they turned down a more crowded street. He knew people were going to gawk at his eye anyways, but it still helped him feel like he was blending in. With his thoughts on the injury for a moment, he was glad that bitch Kotoko was one of the prisoners who had gone off the grid. Good riddance.

“I promise, she’s fine. Not weird with children at all. In fact, she’s really good with them, which is why she could help me on such short notice.” They muttered, “but it’s not like I’m that young…”

“That’s still not normal. Is she some old housewife or something?”

“Ah, are you trying to do the interrogation this time? Actually, I’d say she’s around your age.”

“It’s just you two living alone? I’m still worried about Milgram coming looking for us again – can a girl like that really protect you?”

“Is everyone supposed to live with a big, strong man, like you?”

“Wha–!” Fuuta’s cheeks burned red. “That’s not what I –!”

“I’m only teasing. It’s cute that you care about me.”

That only agitated him more. “It’s not cute! I’m being realistic! One of us has to think about your safety while you’re just distracted by some pretty girl.”

“What makes you think she’s pretty?”

“Well, why else would you be so careless in deciding to live with her?”

All of the sudden, he saw it in Es’ eyes: that spark of mischief that Fuuta had come to loathe. He could never tell what they were plotting, but it was never a good sign.

Es held up their hands in mock surrender. They put on a ridiculous, overdramatic voice. “Ah, you caught me, Fuuta! I’m hiding her identity because she’s the most beautiful, capable woman in all of Japan, and I want to keep her all to myself!” 

He groaned, but they weren’t deterred. “She’s got everything, I couldn’t risk you falling for her! She’s quite capable of defending me. She’s very strong, with protective instincts much like your own. She understands our situation like no one else could. She’s got intense eyes, and you wouldn’t believe her singing voice. She enjoys deep conversations, she’s a dog person, she –”

“ – now you’re being the creep! Just shut up, I get it already...”

When they finally had the decency to pull it together, they reassured him. “It’s all true, though. So there’s no need to worry about me. I’m in good hands.”

Good hands, his ass. In only a brief conversation, the caretaker had gone from sounding a little suspicious to sounding way too good to be true… meaning she was extremely suspicious.

“Maybe someday I’ll introduce you, if you’re lucky...”

He turned his eyes away. “At least let me run some background checks on her first.” 

(He would just stalk her on social media, but that still counted.)

“You’re just going to stalk her on social media. That doesn’t count.”

“Eh? I have legit methods!” He hid deeper under his mask.

Even after the topic was dropped, after he and Es parted ways on an awkward goodbye, Fuuta was left thinking about this mystery woman. It took a bit of digging (and maybe a tiny bit of social media stalking) but at last he found where Es lived with this stranger. Contrary to what they may believe, he had turned over a new leaf. There would be no more hiding behind screens or letting others do the confrontation for him. Now that he was a changed person, he’d do the healthy and normal thing with this information: he’d march on down there himself and confront her like a man. 

He made it all the way to the front door with his chin high. He knocked with confidence. 

Then he began to shift nervously. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get the woman’s description out of his head. Sure, he was here to check on Es, but if someone happened to check him out at the same time, it was only right to be prepared… He straightened his shirt collar. He ran his fingers through his hair. He wondered if he should have covered up his eye to look more presentable.

The door swung open. 

The surprise on Kotoko’s face was nowhere near the amount on Fuuta’s.

“Oh, for fucks sake –!”

From somewhere behind her, Es’ laughter rang out.

[fandoms-my-fandoms]

Guys. I tried to do art. I think I failed but I think it’s also fine???

I am in dire need of advice.

I don’t think this is good by ANY MEANS. But I don’t think it’s terrible for my first try in a WHILE, either.

Anyway, I ✨attempted✨ sketching Colin Bridgerton (or a period romance dude like him lol, Colin’s just my favorite), but I think I need lessons. Or like…I should take an art elective or go to a nearby art studio to learn how to do this shit.

Like…it’s not terrible?? I just haven’t seen a lot of the fan art I want to see, so if I’m not seeing it, I should make it myself right? But I am like…NOT CONFIDENT IN MY ART ABILITIES.

send help plz.

*also stay tuned for more incorrect bridgerton/polin quotes i have saved to my phone. next post will probably be today or tomorrow or something.

[cosmicstarlatte]

⚠️🔞nsfw minors/ageless/blank blogs dni

give me dark circles and eye bags lucifer

I (aggressively) demand the joint pain having, glasses wearing, no caffeine after 4pm, vitamin taking, pretends to be perfect but is actually kind of awkward (pathetic) demon dilf. Let me hug and cuddle this poor exhausted man. Let me fight with him about eating enough and staying hydrated with liquid that's not demonus. Let me reward a tired hard working luci by riding him and giving him a mind shattering orgasm where he then takes a well deserved nap right after. And when he wakes up you bet your ass im taking him on that beloved factory tour he gets so giddy about.

To keep this worn out demon dilf from me is a violation of my human rights and IM TIRED OF IT

[galaxostars]

for some reason I feel like having friends to whom you can come to to celebrate things you’re proud of is more precious and rarer than those to whom you can come to when you’re feeling down

[hollowaluminumvessel]

I would just like to say. Since I cannot find a Canon age for either character, Echoes of Wisdom Zelda is 17 and Link is 12. I don't make the rules except I do and I made these ones

[angelfrogs]

My feelings on Yoshida are...mixed. On the one hand I understand that he is young and in a very toxic environment that encourages pretty amoral behavior, but on the other hand he is a pretty smart guy and should know when his orders are cruel and he should defy them. What he does next will really shape my opinion on him: will he stick by Public Safety or will he aid Denji?

That’s completely understandable. Personally my favorable opinion of him really because of his amoral and atypical behaviors. I think he’s one of the most fascinating characters in part two. There’s so much we don’t know about him, like why/how he joined public safety in the first place (originally in part one he’s introduced as a private hunter temporarily hired by public safety to protect Denji, which leads us to even more questions about his past like how long has he been devil hunting but I digress) I think because of this he’s a very strong parallel to Denji (to me he and sugo are the main non asa parallels) he’s clearly to some extent been raised in life threatening situations/raised killing devils and he also seems to have one devil connection that he relies on and even occasionally acts familiar with. I think the difference is Denji was always treated as expendable and Yoshida has been treated as talented. It’s technically speculative but I think that really ends up explaining a lot about their behaviors. Yoshida is very smart, and he is young and vulnerable, I think him following through with public safety’s cruelty is in fact because of all of those things. I think that where Denji is controlled by ignorance Yoshida may be controlled by information. It’s not hard to convince a kid that the reason he lives while others don’t is because he’s smart enough to make the cruel decisions. But given how upset and frustrated he seemed each time he failed to put Denji on the path with the least public safety intervention, amongst other things, I think it’s safe to say he doesn’t want to be cruel. But it remains unclear if the want to stop being cruel outweighs the “smart” safe decision of staying where he is. Especially now that he’s already lost once to Asa/Yoru. Especially because it’s extremely possible he knows the fate that he could receive if he’s caught disobeying/defecting. No matter what he does I think I’ll always like him as a character, though I really do want him to defect, but honestly what I’m most interested in is answers about his past and current situation. If I had to give guesses on what his fate will be I think he will either die defecting or apologizing for not defecting but that’s just my two cents lol! This manga is always keeping me guessing!

[kha0sd3m0n]

There’s something that hurts with the knowledge that even when Rae ‘shatters’ he breaks into pieces that aren’t technically *his*

Pieces of gods so heavily surrounded by trauma.

No piece of *Rae* was lost.

Just pieces of those who intertwined with him; against his will.

[puddleslimewrites]

Reformed!Supervillain: pauses doing their paperwork at the Hero HQ "...You know what? I miss being evil." :/

All the Heroes and Sidekicks who had to fight them before they reformed: (⊙‿⊙)

[socialanxietyandart]

Currently binge watching one piece cuz why not and I'm on marineford arc and I *know* ace dies intellectually cuz ya know fanfic reading *sshole but also because it's been out forever and foreshadowing ain't no joke so I spoiled it for myself but honestly-

F*ck marineford F*ck the arc ending and finally F*ck reality cuz I'm sick of it so like marineford fix-it fics here I come 😅 we subscribe to ace lives in this house

[jinxed-ninjago]

I love it when I say "Harumi was never evil but her actions were" then get people accusing me of saying Harumi's actions are excusable because it reminds me of this twitter meme

"I don't think Harumi is evil but I'm also not gonna defend her actions because her actions are absolutely evil" "So you think Harumi's actions are excusable?" no i think she's a deeply traumatized person who lashed out violently because her adopted parents neglected her and she basically blamed lloyd for having ever been neglected in the first place which made her lash out violently even more

[ari--anon]

When writing I am weary with contending did you take inspiration from anything for mumbo and ariana's relationship, asking because it was written incredibly well and the lasting effects it had were accurately heart wrenching.

+ just curious but were there any scenes you thought about but scrapped between the two of them? And did Mumbo ever open up about the full extent if it to the other two or is he someone that's better at tackling those kind of things by himself?

Sorry if you can't tell I think about this fic *such* a normal amount (lie)

Thank you so much to give me an opportunity to rant about her :D

Funnily enough, I remember rewatching the movie Whiplash to get inspired for Ariana. For very vague, moreso aesthetic reasons I also got inspired by Slay the princess. Personality wise I knew what I wanted.

As for missing scenes... Sadly none that I've ever actually written, but I did think about her a lot to get a better picture of her and Mumbo's relationship. I certainly could've added more scenes where Ariana was friendly-er to Mumbo, or where things were 'normal' and sort of safe. That was still a big part of their relationship, because even though she wasn't a good person, she did really like Mumbo (even if it's more in a pet way than anything else). Also just for a false sense of security, lol. There probably would've been moments where Mumbo would even defend her in front of Grian, since Grian really liked to rag on her (reasonably) and Mumbo himself wouldn't really know why'd he do that (is it a sense of belonging or is it him being afraid that she'd hear, or is he geniuenly trying to defend her, etc.)

As for Mumbo telling the other two about Ariana, I'd say Grian already knows a lot about her.

He was there around the same time Mumbo was, living in the area long before they actually met. He saw a lot that went down (and maybe even saw some things without Mumbo knowing it). And much much later, as was said, Mumbo would open up about her abuse much later on in life when he felt comfortable enough to do it, and Grian would listen.

As for Scar, I feel like he'd eventually figure out though bits and pieces of them mentioning her, or whatever brief answer he'd get from asking them directly. But the only way he's getting a complete timeline is from Grian, who was involved but only on the outside looking in. The only one that could know the extent of *everything* is Mumbo himself, and sometimes, it's hard for him to know the extent of what happened.

He was affected very badly, but after the epilogue he's at a position in his life where he can settle down and let it go.

Thank you again, and I'll gladly answer any follow up questions!

[shiryawashere]

sometimes you listen to a soundtrack and accidentally cook up the outline for an entire sequel to a slowburn that's already over 50k words long