#technically some of these are a year later so he would actually be 11 but shhh
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Lots of debate on the timeline of events in the outsiders and ages fitting into that, but according to Hinton Pony was born July 22, and he'd been 14 for about a month (line in the movie) when the main events kick off. That would put the murder during late August, which is exactly when that schoolyear would be starting. They only hide out for 5 days, which would put them at early September when they end up back home.
The rumble, Johnny's death, Dally's death, and Pony's concussion fainting happens the night after they get home.
Ponyboy comes to after 3 days, then ends up on bedrest for another week, where he displays delusional thought.
The Juvenile Court hearing presumably occurs shortly after that bedrest, as Pony is still not considered fit to testify on the murder, placing it squarely into the month of September.
It's not super clear how long the depressive episode lasts for Pony, but it's long enough that he is failing his classes and Syme is offering to bring him up to a C. Recalling my high school days, overall grades for fall semester were usually evident by like mid October, so I would give Pony 2-3 weeks, maybe a full month before Syme reaches out.
However, we also know Pony was procrastinating on his assignment, it's part of Darry's nagging iirc, so that + the theme being a final project for the semester, it was probably due mid-late November/maaaayyybe early December.
This is where ages come in bc some of the ages we have from the TV Show Bible don't align with the story's events happening in August.
However.
We know that we are reading Ponyboy's theme. It ends cyclical to the beginning, and there's also evident effort on Ponyboy's end to avoid writing profanity into his recollection. He's 14, been to Hell and back, and also procrastinated on his essay. That is to say, I'd believe it if the argument was made that for some of the surviving characters, he just mentioned how old they were at the time of writing.
Side note, too, that the musical does corroborate the main events happening in late August imo, as it explicitly ties the Curtis Parents' deaths to Darry's birthday; Darry was born January 5, and they died 8 months before the story took place; 8 months from January is obviously September, technically. However. Looking at the calendar year for 1967 (the musical is bumped up 2 years), Darry's birthday fell on the first Thursday of January. If Pony's birthday is July 22nd and it's been a month (not confirmed in the musical to have been a month, but confirmed that he would be 15 next July), the Friday Night Drive-In encounter would have been August 25 (literally the first week of school), 7 months and 3 weeks after the crash; technically not 8 months, but extremely close. If we want to push it closer and move the events a week later, then the drive in would have happened September 1.
In conclusion, my proposed book timeline, cross-referenced with calendars and given school start dates:
Tuesday, January 5, 1965—Darry's Birthday, potentially also the death of Curtis Parents
Thursday, July 22, 1965—Ponyboy's 14th birthday
Thursday, August 26, 1965—Pony gets jumped
Friday, August 27, 1965—Pony goes to the drive-in, Johnny kills Bob (technically this happens in the wee hours of Saturday, but the jumping that led to it was a consequence of the drive in so I'm lumping them)
Saturday, August 28-Wednesday, September 1, 1965— (technically the actual time of Bob's murder) + Windrixville hideout + fire + Hospital reunion
Thursday, September 2, 1965—Rumble + Johnny's death + Dally's Death + Pony's concussion
Friday, September 3-Sunday, September 5, 1965—Pony in feverish delirium
Monday, September 6-Sunday, September 12, 1965—Pony on Bedrest
Monday, September 13, 1965—Juvenile Court
Tuesday, September 14, 1965-Depressive fugue begins
Monday, October 11 or 18, 1965—Mr Syme alerts Ponyboy of his failing grade+presents semester's final project in the form of a personal theme.
Mid November, 1965—theme is written
#the outsiders#ponyboy curtis#and while hinton isnt in charge of the adaptations we know she was involved with the movie and has interacted with the musical cast#so she probably approves of the timing benchmarks given therein
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THIS JUST IN: WORLDS SNAZZIEST 10 YEAR OLD
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Please do not use or repost my works anywhere without explicit permission from me first, thank you <3)
#deersart#my art#psychonauts#psychonauts 2#razputin aquato#psychonauts razputin#psychonauts raz#my son he means the world to me#technically some of these are a year later so he would actually be 11 but shhh#i like dressing him up in little outfits#he’s still figuring out his own fashion sense#but now they atleast fit#was definitely inspired by some of the outfit concept art for him#took free liberties with some of them though#yes the flower and bracelet are from lili
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December Christmas Monster stories
December 10.) Werewolf neighbor
Ok sorry about this one, it might technically be December 11 by the time I post it but it's still the 10th day. This one is actually going to be a two parter as I wrote so damn much for this one, it was actually meant to be far more longer than this but the rest will be for later. Walter is definitely going to have more stories writen about him.
Warnings: bodys pressing together, neck sniffing with no promotion, meantion of divorce, seasonal depression
Minors Don't Interact!!!
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Sitting on your couch you looked down at the pathetic box of christmas decorations. It was your first time spending Christmas completely alone. No family to come over, all your friends were too far away and spending the holidays with their own families. You didn’t even bother with getting a tree this year, you didn’t see the point of doing one all by yourself.
Looking at your empty living room, void of any Christmas decorations it only served to make you sadder. “Maybe it couldn’t hurt to get a little tree?” You mumbled to yourself. Perhaps that’s what you needed to help cheer up your seasonal depression even for a little bit.
Throwing on a jacket and some winter boots you headed out to find a store for your impulse christmas tree purchase. You definitely weren’t planning on getting a real tree. It would be too much of a hassle getting it home alone plus you really weren’t looking forward to cleaning up pine sap and needles once it started to die.
Making your way to the store you noticed a very familiar fuzzy shape walking on the path alone. Slowing your car down to a crawl you rolled down your window getting a much clearer view of your next door neighbor Walter the recently divorced werewolf. He was walking on the snowy sidewalk with a big flannel jacket and black jeans. The sound of your car slowing down caused his ears to perk up on high alert. Without even looking at you he sniffed the air, his tail wagged when he recognized the scent he was smelling. “Well isn’t it (Y/n)!” He said, turning his head to look at you. “Heya Walter, you need a lift? It’s pretty cold to be walking around.” You told him offering a ride, you didn’t mind pushing off shopping a little longer if it meant making sure Walter was out of the snow, nothing else at all totally not because you wanted to spend more time with your recently divorced neighbor, none at all nope. Seeing the smile he flashed you at your offer made your heart skip a beat, you blamed it on seeing his sharp teeth and not because of his smile so bright it could melt frozen butter.
Not refusing the offer to get out of the snow Walter walked to your passenger door and got in. It was only then did you notice he was wearing booties on his paws. You wouldn’t want to be walking in the snow barefoot either. Though the sight was rather funny to see, a big bad werewolf in booties with a fur trim.
“So where were you headed? I don’t want to take you away from where you were going too much.” Walter said not bothering to buckle up, he couldn’t buckle up in your car even if he tried. He was a little too big to sit comfortably in the passenger seat but he made it work. “Oh I was just heading to the store to see if I could find any Christmas trees for my place.” You answered honestly. In the corner of your eye you could see something moving after you spoke. Glancing his way you realized it was his tail wagging. “What a coincidence! I'm on my way to get a tree too!” He said smiling, his eyes not leaving you. As if he could pull them away, how could he when you looked so cute bundled up in that jacket. “That makes things easier then.” A chuckle left your lips as you talked causing his tail to wag again.
Pulling into the store's parking lot you tried to find a spot closer to the front, you didn’t want to walk far in the snow. You were glad the plow trucks already came or else you would have turned around and gone home. “Want to do our shopping together? I find shopping more fun when you have someone with you.” Walter offered looking down at your shorter frame, he was just so damn tall it made you feel so small. “I don’t see why not, it makes leaving easier sense we rode here together.” Your agreement made his tail wag again, you assumed it was because he was glad he didn’t have to shop alone.
Going in you were about to grab a cart when Walter beat you to it, stepping in front of you. “I got it, you drove me here, buying your things is the least I can do.” He said pulling out a cart, as you began to protest he held up a paw stopping you. “I insist, please.” That managed to get you to quiet down. “Alright fine, I was only going to get the tree though.” That wasn't fully true, you were looking forward to getting a shit ton of junk food and eat your feelings but you didn’t want him spending a bunch of money so you would just have to get them for your next shopping trip. Walking next to Walter you soon learned you should be walking a few steps ahead of him after you consistently got hit on the mid back by his wagging tail. It seemed almost every thing made his tail wag. A good deal on something? Tail wagging. Something he wanted was back in stock? Tail wagging again. A song he liked started playing on the store's radio? You guessed it, tail wagging. It would have been very entertaining if you weren’t in the line of fire of his wagging tail. The thing hit harder than you thought it would. You weren’t even sure he noticed he kept hitting you with it as he happily rambled on about deals going on. Seeing his cart was getting more and more filled, you started to worry a little about how much he was spending that you yourself hadn’t noticed how he kept asking if you liked certain snacks. The ones that got a positive from you went into the cart, ones you didn’t like very much went back on the shelf. Once the cart was filled to the brim with snacks, the two of you made your way away from the food area. Walter was making his way to the outdoor section for a real tree and you made a turn to the Christmas decor to get a fake tree. Noticing you weren’t next to him Walter stopped and looked around for you. Spotting you walking in a different direction he turned the cart and followed you catching up quickly thanks to his larger size. “Trees aren’t over here silly.” He said, chuckling softly. “Oh uh I was just going to get a fake one, I don’t feel like getting a real one this year.” You explained shrugging lightly as you looked up at him. “Really? Why not?” He was confused on why someone wouldn’t want a real tree. “Just doesn’t feel right getting a real tree if it’s just me, no point to it.” The effort didn’t seem worth it to you, why bother if no one was going to help with any part of itWalter’s ears flattened as his shoulders visibly dropped hearing what you had to say about getting a real tree. “Oh… there really isn’t a point for me to get a real tree this year either. Just got one every year. I didn't think about not getting one.” His voice held a sad tone as his eyes lowered to the ground, tail long stopped wagging now was tucked between his legs.
You felt like an asshole when it hit you. This was his first christmas since his divorce, it was most likely his first christmas alone in years if not his first ever one alone. Mentally cursing yourself you raced to think of something to make this all better. “How about I spend Christmas with you? So then you can still get a real tree?” You blurted out with wide panicked eyes. Hearing that his ears perked up as he looked up at you. It was an immediate change in his demeanor, tail wagging much faster as it had been before he stood up taller. “Really? You would spend Christmas with this old fluff ball?” He asked, stepping closer to you. The closeness really putting it in your mind just how much bigger he was than you were. Gulping nervously you nodded your head, mind still reeling from your own actions. Walter swooped you up and spun you around in one fluid motion squeezing you tight. You had only seen him do this with his family before, not once had he ever with you. Stopping he looked down at you with a big smile on his face as his tail wagged a mile a minute. “Um Walter?” You spoke up after an agonizingly long moment like this. He responded with a soft hum as he leaned his snot in closer. The hot air of his breath grazed against your face sending shivers all over your body. “We’re in the middle of the store, remember?” He had seemed to have forgotten this. Lifting his head he looked around seeing there were people giving the two of you strange looks. “Whoops, got a little excited there.” Walter apologized, setting you back down on the ground. His tail hadn’t slowed down one bit. You feared he might form a tornado with how much his tail stirred up the air around him. “Well come on then, let’s go get that tree!” He said, grabbing your hand with his paw. You couldn’t help but stare at your hand intertwined with his paw. When the two of you had first met he had shaken your hand and at the time you noticed in that brief moment how soft his paw pads were. Holding his paw for much longer you really got a good feel of just how soft they were. It wasn’t just soft, no they were squishy too. You wondered if he would let you play with them some time. As your mind wondered about his soft paws your thoughts slowly grew to wonder how they would feel on other parts of your body. Catching yourself before the thoughts grew more impure as they had already gotten you shook your head trying to shoo them away.
Walter hadn’t noticed this and you were damn glad of it. He just kept pushing the cart around with one paw as he walked much slower than he had before. You were walking slower too, it was the pace you usually had. It took you a moment longer than you would like to admit when it clicked with you that he was walking slower for your sake. Smiling softly to yourself you looked away wanting to put your focus anywhere else than Walter. Making your way into the out door section you shivered feeling an especially harsh gust of wind hit you causing you to brace yourself from the cold. It stung at your eyes making you close them tight. Expecting more wind to hit, you braced yourself again turning a little but stopped when you felt Walters paw leave your hand and wrap around you not a moment later pulling you into his side. “Look at you shivering like a chihuahua. You don’t got no way to keep you warm. Here stay close to me, I'll keep you warm.” Walter said, leaning against you. It was just so warm you couldn’t find the will to fight him on it and just accepted his embrace. Lucky for you, you were able to hide your smile by burying your face in the side of his coat, plus it kept your already freezing nose out of the snow. Walking to the trees with him Walter quietly hummed along to the song currently playing through the store's speakers. You left the tree finding to him. It seemed he knew what he was doing while you were clueless on the matter. It was obvious when he found the right tree as he excitedly moved from one paw to the other. You tried to stifle a laugh at the sight of a werewolf doing tippy tappys. As much as you didn’t want to pull away from his warmth you knew he wouldn’t be able to drag the tree through the store while pushing the cart and also holding onto you but when you went to move away from him his grip on you tightened pulling you in closer to him. “We can still check out here right?” He called out to the one employee working gardening, they nodded their head yes. “Oh good we’ll check out here and take everything straight to the car.” Walter said, picking the tree up. “Can you come scan this for us?” He asked, holding the tree up. Walter was making things harder for himself, he should let go, why wasn’t he letting go? Looking down at you he smiled softly as he gave you a gentle squeeze. “Step onto the cart I’ll push you around, that way you can still be nice and warm.” Oh… you hadn’t thought about that, could work. Without a word you stepped up onto the cart holding onto the cart's handle bar for support. The moment you felt Walter press his chest against your back you lost every ability to breathe. You didn’t think this through. Being this close to him like this in this position? You're glad it was cold, you could blame your face being so red.
Standing there on the cart trapped from all sides, oh boy did it make you feel things you shouldn't.
Next few minutes were a blank for you too deep in your ever growing thoughts as Walter checked out all his groceries and paid for it all. You could hear him hum again as he started walking to your car. The parking lot was quite bumpy causing the cart and you in turn to raddle like crazy. That is until Walter pressed his chest against your back stopping your shaking. His muzzle was right next to your ear. You could feel his hot breath on your neck. It sent a flood of dirty thoughts into your mind, a gasp left your lips before you could stop it. You prayed to any god out there that he didn't hear it. If he had he hadn't said anything.
What he did notice was how your scent had changed, grown more aroused. You realized something was up when he suddenly pressed his nose to your neck and took a deep breath in. A low growl rumbled in the back of his throat as he inhaled your scent. The moment he caught himself doing that he pulled away in a jerking motion. “I um…” He stammered trying to think of an excuse. “I like your body wash. What is it? Daisys?” Walters heart was practically beating out of his chest, you could feel it against your back. “No uh sweat pea actually. Was on sale.” You answered in a quiet voice trying to possess what just happened. “Ah, sales love them.” He mumbled softly.
The rest of the ride home was completely silent. Neither of you baring to speak after that little incident. Pulling into his driveway you put your car in park and quietly gulped. The two of you sat in silence a few minutes more before Walter finally broke the silence. “Want to come in and decorate the tree with me?” He asked, looking at you through the corner of his eye gauging your reaction. Thinking about it you lightly chewed the bottom of your lip. Oh what the hell, what's the worst thing that could happen? “Sure.” Your answer made his tail wagged as he lit up with a bright smile. What could happen? You weren't sure what but you wanted it.
#monster#monster fucker#monster stories#werewolves#werewolf x nonbinary reader#werewolf x female reader#werewolf x male reader#werewolf x female#werewolf x reader#werewolf x human#werewolf daddy#werewolf dilf#december christmas monster stories#monster x male#monster x male reader#werewolf x male#monster x female#monster x human#monster x reader#monster x y/n#monster x you#werewolf x y/n#werewolf fluff#werewolf fucker#sfw monster#monster fluff
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Very First Time (c.b. one-shot)
𝓢𝓷𝓲𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓽 (𝓶𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓑𝓣𝓒): “It’s you who wants to kiss me. I told you I’m a better kisser then you, so, if you don’t believe me why don’t you come find out.” He mused and went right back to reading. You sat there for a few moments, dumbfounded. You had a crush on Carmy, but it was only founded when you weren’t together - well, that was a lie, you still thought about kissing him while you were with him but would scold yourself for it that it was weird because he’s your best friend and it’s wrong to think of him that way.
♡ Chapter Inspo: So High School - Taylor Swift ; "You know what you wanted & boy you got her" ♡ Summary: Based on ✩This✩ big brained ask from @carmenberzattosgf ♡ W/C: 9.4K ♡ Posted Date: 06/11/2024 ♡ A/N: Omg I had so much fucking fun writing this you have no idea!!! I hope this satisfies your virgin carmy tooth my dirty olive martini! Also, New look for this one shot how are we feeling yall? ♡ Warnings for BTC: SMUT SMUT SMUT, Characters are 18+, High school relationship, childhood best friend trope, virgin!carmy, Fem!/AFAB!Reader, R has long hair, No use of Y/N (r goes by childhood nickname 'squish'
♡ 𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 ♡ ➵ 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘮��� 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 / 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵 ♡ ➵ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 ♡
2010
You had thought about this year at least monthly since … well - kindergarten. This was your year.
Graduation year.
4 decent years of high school were coming to a close. You were freshly 18 as of last week, and felt exactly the same. You actually felt worse now that your birthday had passed you by. Why? Oh. Virginity. Still having one, that thing.
As far as you knew, all of your friends had lost theirs by now, well - you weren’t so sure. You’d think asking your longest time friend if they were also holding onto their precious dire to get rid of virginity cards as well would be easy, right?
Wrong. Very wrong.
This was because your bestest longest term friend? You’d been concealing a massive crush on him since sophomore year. Well, actually - technically 7th grade, when he saved your volcano from prematurely erupting by pouring borax in the hole from his project about borax crystallization after the nastiest girl in the grade dumped the cup of vinegar in it while you weren’t looking so it would explode prematurely while the teacher wasn’t watching and you’d get zero credit.
But, you told yourself that he was just a really nice person like his sister who had babysat you a few times, so he’d probably heard about you from her and was simply being friendly. Nevertheless, the interaction made you fast friends.
What sealed the deal to you being so close, though, was when a few days later one of the mean boys in the grade tried to make Carmy his newest victim by continually throwing pencils at the back of his head. He did this every class to someone new, and always while the teacher wasn’t looking.
You had waited just until half a second before the pencil flew and “Mrs.Harrison!” urgently left your lips, she quickly looked up, just in time to see the moron let the pencil go, it hit the back of Carmys head, and for Carmy send him a silent glare.
“Jared! That’s a week of detention. It has been you with those pencils. I’m calling home too- this disruptive behavior is unacceptable!” She was so focused on writing out detention slips that she didn’t even remember you had grabbed her attention. Carmy gave you one of his shy close-mouthed smiles that made his adorable dimples show before going back to drawing some pair of cargo jean looking things on the inside of his notebook cover.
This sealed your friendship because you had shown him your loyalty. You have my back, I have yours was always the mentality between you two. By the time you got to high school, you and Carmy were attached at the hip. In middle school, specifically in eighth grade, people would tease you two that you were dating.
The both of you were late bloomers and hadn’t even thought about Carmy or anyone in that way yet, but by sophomore year of high school the teasing really hit home because you did have a crush on him but thought you were absolutely sure he could never like you back, that he saw you as a sister.
Until one fateful June afternoon.
You were laid on your full sized bed together in your childhood bedroom, flicking through a J-14 magazine to get all the latest gossip on the celebrities you follow when you settle on the Ask Sabrina page, a forum where a girl answers dating and love questions.
Dear Sabrina,
I was wondering - what age should you have your first kiss, French kiss, lose your virginity etc? I’m already 16 and I haven’t had sex yet, I had my first kiss at 14 and my first French kiss this year. But I feel like such a loser cause all my friends are having sex, and say it’s so much fun!! Is it really worth the hype?
Jane from California
You roll your eyes. 16 and already had her first French kiss. She was 2 years ahead of you in that sense. You hadn’t had sex yet, either. You hadn’t really kissed a boy for real either. The only kiss you’d had to date was -
Ew!
You had to rectify this situation immediately. The only kiss you’d had to date was Billy Guerrero? In fifth grade?! You couldn’t believe yourself. You’d let time slip away, you’d let your real first kiss prime time slip away. What guy is gonna want a girl at college who was gonna want to date a girl who can’t even kiss properly! You’d bet Carmy had kissed girls, hell he’d probably had sex already. With who you weren’t sure because the only person Carmy opened his mouth to give more then a muttered yes or no were you, and his direct family.
Maybe it was with Claire down the street, she always seemed to you to be sweet on him. He would probably be better for him, anyway. If Mikey wasn’t teasing him about her being his girlfriend, he was teasing about you being his girlfriend. Each time he brought it up Carmy would go red as a tomato and tell him to shut up, and if Richie was around it would get even worse.
You wondered if he liked it, why he didn’t tell you about it - wait - why hadn’t the two of you talked about sex? It wasn’t until this moment you’d realized you’d never breached the topic. You laid your magazine on your chest, flicking the cover of Carmys Spider-Man comic with your nail to get his attention from your position sprawled out over his thighs as your pillow.
“Mm” he hums in response, blue eyes continuing to move across the page. That was something you always loved about Carmy, those large round blue eyes. You loved to tease him that he looked like Flik from bugs life. You’d done very intense studying of those eyes from your many intense staring contests over the summer breaks you two spent together, he would cheat to win, of course - but you liked having an excuse to look at his eyes, so you didn’t mind.
“What was your first kiss like?” You test the waters. Without even realizing what you had done, he mirrored you and laid his open comic on his chest to hold his page so he could give you his full attention.
“First kiss?” He repeats. You couldn’t believe how much better his stutter had gotten over last summer. He had told you he wanted it gone or at least as gone as he could get it by the time you went off to college, so the two of you checked out all the speech pathology books the library had to offer and got to work every day. It was hard work, but after about a month he got the hang of it.
“Very first kiss, well - real kiss” you clarify and by nature he brushed away your bangs that had fallen in front of your eyes from the woosh of air that came from putting his comic down.
“Uh- w-wh-“ he stops himself, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, focusing really hard on what he was trying to say and a few seconds later he tries again “what’s a real kiss? Like a kiss that’s not just the back of my hand?” He joked and you snorted a chuckle, rolling your eyes playfully.
“Yes dummy like- like a real kiss on a date or something or like…I dunno have you ever had a girlfriend? Well, before you met me? Would a 6th grade girlfriend count?” You thought out loud. You hadn’t ever had a boyfriend before, and Carmy hadn’t said he was dating anyone and spent all of his time with you that wasn’t spent at home or at school, so you could safely assume he hadn’t, but just wanted to be sure.
“n-no- no girlfriend uh- why do you ask?” He cleared his throat that way Richie did after he asked a question he knew was stupid and you shrugged a bit
“So who have you kissed? Claire?” You ask and those big blue eyes go wide as saucers as he shakes his head no like a bobble head
“What - what?! W-why why would you think I kissed Claire? Claire- Claire Dunlap? from down the street?” He clarified, his cheeks heating up
“Woah! Do you have a crush on her?” You sat up and he groaned, rubbing over his face dramatically.
“Squiiish. Not you too” he groaned dramatically. “No! I don’t like Claire! Actually to be f-fucking honest everyone always trying to cram her down my throat makes me hate her!” He huffed
“Well then who have you kissed! A real kiss!?” You question with a laugh, unsure why he was being so secretive over something so small. The two of you could vote in the next election for Christ sake, a kiss shouldn’t be this big of a deal.
“No one!” He blurts, the heat from his cheeks bleeding up to the tips of his ears and down his neck and collarbones. “There. Ok! No one and I sure as fuck didn’t kiss Claire Dunlap.” He crossed his arms, averting your gaze. You were sat there, just staring. You were frankly trying to absorb that, it was surprising to you with such a stud of an older brother - he hadn’t gotten around.
“Me either” you said after a few beats of silence and his eyes quickly found yours again, mouth dropping slightly and he blinked a few times, the way that told you he was trying to digest what you were saying.
“Y-you haven’t kissed Claire-“
“Anyone” you interrupted. His jaw dropped like a trout as he stared at you in shock and you grabbed your magazine, rolling it up and bonking him on the head with it. “Don’t look at me like that! You haven’t kissed anyone either! I technically have you beat because I kissed Billy G. at recess in fifth grade once even though it was just like… a mom kiss you know like a- like” you demonstrate a little puckery peck of your lips.
His eyes narrowed with jealousy and you smiled proudly “Squish, one - Bear? Zero” that was one thing about you two, you were always in a competition of some kind. Who could run farther, who could read a book faster, who could get their homework done first, you never realized it translated into other things too, and that neither of you were in the lead.
“I bet I’m better then you at kissing even though I haven’t done it I’ve practiced more so I’m good when it’s time for me to show my skill” he smirked, picking up his comic again. You scoffed
“Practice? On what, your bathroom mirror? It doesn’t count if it’s not a person, dummy.” You said and he shrugged
“Find out” he said casually, eyes not tearing up from the page. Now it was your cheeks that felt like they were on fire. Find out?! Find out what, does he even realize what he’s offering you right now?!
“Find out? What- you want to kiss me?” You said and he smirked a bit, dimples showing and his eyes flick back to yours.
“It’s you who wants to kiss me. I told you I’m a better kisser then you, so, if you don’t believe me why don’t you come find out.” He mused and went right back to reading. You sat there for a few moments, dumbfounded. You had a crush on Carmy, but it was only founded when you weren’t together - well, that was a lie, you still thought about kissing him while you were with him but would scold yourself for it that it was weird because he’s your best friend and it’s wrong to think of him that way.
But now he was just offering like it was his apple he didn’t want at lunch.
“French or regular?” You ask, trying to play it cool and the astonished look on his face led you to cackle, shoving his shoulder “what?! Stop looking at me like that weirdo!” You said and he smiled, shaking his head and doing one of those slow Carmy blinks as he sighs, a little smirk on his lips. He always reminded you of Natalie when he did that, he must have gotten it from her.
“You want me to stick my tongue in your mouth?” He mused and you nod
“I actually think it goes both ways- and with 0 practice I’d win. Sure of it.” You said cockily and shrugged a bit. He snorts a chuckle
“And how do we determine a winner?” He asked, shutting his comic and resting it on the nightstand next to your bed like he was genuinely weighing the offer in his mind.
You were quiet for a few moments, looking at him carefully - and it seemed like he was serious as you were, so you said “It’s supposed to feel good, right? So…whoever like..moans first?”
“Uh o-okay- okay sure um.” He swallowed thickly, wiping his hands on his jeans that you assumed were clammy now how they got when he was nervous. “So- how- how do you wanna like- sit,” he asked. Fuck. You were just now realizing you weren’t actually sure. Your heart was thumping so hard in your chest, blood was roaring in your ears. This was all going so fast - you were going to do it. You were going to kiss your crush.
“Uh-“ you said stupidly, tucking your hair behind your ears and digging your chapstick out of your pocket, cause guys like soft cherry flavored lips, right? If he was kissing you for a stupid competition you may as well make it good. “Yeah um. I think, maybe criss cross? Right? Like how we would play sailer by the sea” you crossed your legs and sat in front of him
“We should play later I’ve been practicing with nat - I’m totally gonna beat you” he crossed his legs, and you moved in closer so your knees were touching but your faces were still about 2 feet apart, too big a distance for a kiss. “Also- we’re gonna need to be closer” he said plainly. You snorted a laugh,
“Yes - we can play. How am I supposed to get closer?” You asked, and in one fluid motion he stuck his hands under your calves, and uncrossed your legs before dragging you forward quickly and wrapping your legs around his waist. You could feel his breath.
“There” he looks at you, eyes fanning from your eyes to your lips and back again. “That’s ok, right?” The low softness of his voice, mixed with the action of him just taking control how he did - it sent this feeling down to your core that felt so good. Like a pleasureful pulsing heartbeat, the only time you got that feeling was when you were alone in bed at night squeezing your thighs together thinking about Carmy.
“Mmhmm” you hummed, unsure what to do with your hands so you settled for placing them on your thighs. “So- uh- ok. I guess um..let’s get started?” Your voice was small, nervous. A definite switch of roles for the two of you. You weren’t sure if this was normal, but you assumed it was for Carmy.
He was being so normal about it, the same normal he was when you got your period at his house - he just went to Natalie’s bathroom, and came back to the guest bathroom with a few pads and tampons for you, as well as feminine wipes - normal. Not weird, like this happens every day for him. Like - periods (or in this case) sex isn’t the most embarrassing thing to teen life. His chill demeanor told you that he strictly saw it as a platonic friendly competition, so why do your panties feel sticky all the sudden?
“It’s ok- we don’t have to-“ he’s interrupted by your lips on his,
Now or never, right?
It was warm, a little messy at first, you found out quickly you should close your eyes since he closed his and once you did it was much easier to just focus on the sensation. His lips were soft, he tasted like the bowl of trix cereal he must have had before he came over. The way his lips moved with yours was… gentle, sweet, unhurried- you found yourself chasing them when he pulled away slightly and that caused you to open your eyes
“You-“ he huffs a small chuckle “you have t’kiss back, Squish. S’like i’m kissing a wall here” he said. You took a shaky breath, not even realizing you were just sat there like a dead fish, unmoving, in awe that his lips were really on yours. If you hadn’t just finished your period a week ago you’d be scrambling to the bathroom to see what was going on because you were gushing.
“Uh- sorry- sorry. I was just warming up” you clear your throat awkwardly, fingers tapping on your thighs nervously “lets try again” you said, leaning in and additionally mashing your nose with his “ow- oh- gosh, sorry” you giggle and he followed suit
“S’not your fault my beak is getting in the way” he joked, gently tilting your face and bringing his lips back to yours. You got the message this time, moving your lips with his and wow. It felt…good. That heartbeat right above your cunt had never pulsed so hard before, it nearly hurt and you weren’t sure what to do about it with him right there.
You’d usually use the firm corner of one of your throw pillows you kept on your bed when this uncomfortable sensation happened, thinking of exactly this - kissing Carmy - and hump it, and hump it, and hump it, until you were frustrated to tears because you still felt like you weren’t finished. That the feeling would never go away unless you stopped thinking about Carmy like that - but it was addictive, and you couldn’t help but think you were chasing something.
It all elevated when you felt his tongue on your bottom lip, it was almost like the sensation in your core was beginning to travel throughout your entire body and that had never happened before. It went from just that strong pulsing in your cunt, travelling to a tightness that was winding up in your stomach, your breasts felt good - as strange as that thought was, the only time you remembered they were there was when they were sore because your period was coming, so the warm gushy feeling in your chest and the pangs of pleasure that were coursing through you from the simple swipe of his tongue was something to be revered.
From there, it was like you were following a script you hadn’t even known you’d memorized. Your hands found his shoulders, before travelling to the back of his neck and rubbing over the little curls at the base. You swipe your tongue over his, fingers sprawling over the back of his head to pull him in closer. You didn’t know what came over you, but you deepened the kiss, and he accepted. His hands found the back of your waist, squeezing gently and trailing up your sides, stopping hard below your breasts.
You pulled away, looking at him. If it was any other day, he’d have thought you were initiating a staring contest, but the blown-out look in your eyes and small pants leaving your lips reminded him of when their family cat had a little too much catnip and started climbing the screen doors, wild. His eyes nearly fell out of his head when the next question left your lips
“Have you had sex before?” your voice was breathy, if you had known better you’d have called it for what it was - horny. The only thing on your mind was Carmy, not how your mom would be home any minute and you forgot to take out the chicken for dinner, not how it probably isn’t a normal thing for best friends or any friends really, to kiss. But you and Carmy hadn’t really ever been ‘normal’ friends.
“Uhhh” he tried to find his words. He looked so pretty. His cheeks were the pretty flush pink you loved on him so much, it suited him. His lips were swollen and kiss bitten and red. You realized that the glossiness on them was a mixture of your salivas and that brought a burst of that delicious warmth to your chest. “N-no, haven’t have you- I mean- can you have sex without kissing?” he wondered out loud.
“I don’t want to leave high school a virgin” you blurt out. It was half true, you did feel a bit like a loser, even though you could always lie and tell people you had done it even if you hadn’t. It also felt like the one opportunity was presenting itself for you to have sex with your childhood crush and if he agreed, then a win is a win in your book.
“Alright and- and uh” he sits back on the headboard, huffing a chuckle and rubbing over his mouth as he thought, staring up at the ceiling to try and get a gauge on what he was about to say. It was one of the habits he’d picked up during all of your speech practice together, it was cute, almost like he was stopping the words from falling out of his mouth before he was ready to say them so it didn’t come out all jumbly and stuttered. “And you wan’t help with this- i’m assuming you see it as a problem? Thats why you brought it up, right? You want help with that…issue” he mused.
Suddenly, you felt really, really shy. Shy, stupid, flustered, any synonym for embarrassed and feeling like a complete and utter moron. “I shouldn’t have said anything - i’m sorry, uh- you win” You got up, going over to your dresser and digging out your after-school clothes to change since you were in jeans still. Why the hell would you say that? What, was he gonna just offer to have sex with y-
“I-I mean- I don’t want to, either. I just uh- haven’t… y’know - met anyone who I trusted enough to do it with. But- it- it felt good… the kiss? So, if you wanted we could um..cause- cause I trust you, I trust you more then like…anyone- so, yeah- I-I mean it’s like- like a favor right? You uh…scratch my back- er whatever the saying is- if- if you want to” you looked back at him to see him rambling with his gaze locked on the floor, clearly feeling as stupid and embarrassed as you feel.
Holy shit, this may actually happen.
“Yeah- yeah” you agree, mulling it over in your mind. He’s right, this shouldn’t change your friendship, because from what you’d heard - losing said virginity wasnt fun, it was weird, uncomfortable, and a little gross sometimes, so it was almost like you two could get the awkward first time part out of the way together so you could both hit the ground running in terms of dating and hooking up when it came to college, cause that's what college was supposed to be all about, right? Finding the love of your life?
“Sure- Uh-” you swallow thickly and toss him one of the many pairs of sweatpants he kept in your dresser for when he slept over as well as a fresh t-shirt and grab yourself a clean pair of panties from your top drawer since although the awkwardness had taken away that dull needy ache, you were still uncomfortably wet and had to get yourself cleaned up and changed. “How about Friday? My parents have their date night so- you could come over after school and we can um…do it?” you ask and he nodded quickly, grabbing the sweatpants and sweatshirt.
“Yeah- perfect, that’s - mmhmm” he swallowed hard, cheeks bright red. You would totally be making fun of him right now if you weren’t absolutely sure you looked just as flustered, the two of you sharing at eachother in silence like a pair of deer in headlights.
“I’m gonna go change” you said and left the room, closing the bathroom door behind you and sighing deeply to yourself, leaning against the door.
And so it was set.
Carmy had exactly 3 days to study up on this topic other than sophomore health class he knew absolutely nothing about. Well- he had found one of Michaels Playboy magazines before when he was 14, it was the first time he popped a boner and it freaked him out so bad since his father wasn’t very present and Mike hadn’t given him the talk yet. It was a solid 2 months of worrying that he had some weird dick cancer because he got hard every time he peeked through said porn-mag before he asked Mike about it, and he still hasn’t lived down the teasing. Thank god Mike kept his word on not telling Richie.
The moment he left your house that day it was straight to the Chicago public library. 3 books, 3 days. He was going to do his homework on this, because he was going to win the game he knew was inevitably pun intended coming his way. It was going to become a competition, and he knew the name of the game in sex was an orgasm, he knew that much at least, thank god.
The 3 titles he’d settled on,
Sex For Dummies ; He’d figured that should speak for itself, it sounded to him like the beginners guide to fucking. He wondered why every teen didn’t get a copy of this book, he’d heard guys talking about how sometimes girls are really bad in bed - so if everyone got one, like the dictionaries they all got in elementary school - he thought their lives would probably be made easier in that department.
She Comes First; and boy, was that a read. He stayed up so late Wednesday night reading it that you had to wake him in homeroom when the bell rang to go to first period. He didn’t know there were so many things to know about a vagina, but he was confident now he probably knew more then any guy in the school about pussys and what gets them going at least on paper once he read all 350 pages in one day.
He comes next; It made alot of sense. This was the breaziest read for him, he sat on the L after school reading it on the ride home. Of course, the front was covered in a brown paper bag he’d taped to it so no one could tell what he was reading, he wasn't a pervert! He was glad he read she comes first, first, because he’d learned that girls can cum more then once, and that when they do - it gets better each time. He also learned that the clit is the best part to touch, and that it actually has like- a tail? Or something? Inside that you can mess with too, and it feels super good for the girl. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to find something like that with his dick, but he guessed he’d figure it out.
The day was finally here. You had been thinking about it all week long. The prep you were doing was very different then the prep he was. You were making sure your entire body was smooth, plucking your eyebrows, waxing your upper lip, whitening your teeth, shaving your big toe. Literally, anything and everything grooming. You had put on a lacy pink thong that you’d gotten at the mall a year or so ago in preparation for the night you finally did this, but after observing yourself in the mirror you felt insecure about it. It was just Carmy, he wasn’t into you, it would be weird if you tried to be sexy, right? Like you were trying to seduce him or something? So you settled on some plain grey panties, instead, and a black bra.
You heard a knock at the door right at 7. Exactly on time, per usual. Your parents had left for their date 20 minutes ago, so it was perfect timing. When you opened the door, you heart may as well have melted and poured out of your ass to see Carmy standing there with a bundle of red roses. “Hey- uh- so - got you these” he thrust them in your direction. They were already cut, and thornless, ready to be plopped in a vase. You could see a little bandage on the pinky finger of his non-dominant hand that wasn’t there at school today, he must have pricked himself while he was trimming them up.
“Y’get a girl flowers, you trim em’ up, n’for the roses gotta take the thorns off, eh’? Don’t wan’t t’hurt ylady do you? And you trim ‘em cause girls like it, makes em’ all even n’shit. N’it Makes em’ live longer too. Y’givin a gift not a chore heard? Flowers need to be able to be dropped in a vase and that's it, otherwise y’re a prick f’givin’ y’r lady a job t’do” Mikey explained as he snipped the thorns off of the roses he’d gotten for his date. The conversation stuck with Carmy all these years, he promised himself one day he’d put the advice to use.
“Oh- wow - Bear, these are like -” you leaned in, smelling them deeply, the sweet floral sense filling your nose “Wow- this is so sweet of you, you didn’t have to” you stepped back and opened the door wider. He followed you in, shutting the door behind him like usual.
“Mikey says it’s what y’do I guess, so - expect flowers from guys you do this with” he nudged you with his shoulder playfully. The action made your heart flutter but also stomach sink , heavy with nerves. Right. He’s here to just get something over with, like he was probably expecting you to be and the flowers were just a result of him wanting to do things right and not because he had any real, tangible feelings for you other than platonic.
“Mmm, will do. Thanks- I’m gonna go get these in some water, you can get settled” you told him and headed into the kitchen to find a vase. When you came back to the room his hoodie was neatly folded and sitting on your desk, his shoes tucked away beneath it and there was a… towel? On your bed?
“Uh-” you set the vase of flowers on your dresser
“Right- uh- so the towel, they say in the books for your first time, sometimes girls will bleed a little? Or- or if I do it right things can get really wet, so…just trying to be proactive I didn’t wanna make a huge mess y’know?” he explained while staring at the towel and rubbing the back of his neck nervously how he did, heat creeping across the bridge of his nose and onto his cheeks.
“You…studied?” you smile a bit at the idea. You wondered how he did so, did he just watch porn?! You had heard from girls with boyfriends that watch porn - the sex was usually bad, and that they went way to hard and fast. You hoped it wasn’t that.
“Yeah I read some stuff.. How else will I know what the fuck m’doin?” he watched you as you sat down on top of the towel, assuming that was the spot he meant for you.
“Uh- yea…yeah. Ok, well thanks- I guess I should have studied, too. Didn’t even think about it- my legs are soft, though. And I shaved my - um- yeah.” you said, voice getting meeker and smaller by the end. The two of you were never like this, it was usually constant banter and comfortable silence. Awkwardness wasnt something the two of you experienced together up until now.
“Thank you- you didn’t have to it’s…it’s just hair. But um…go pee, before we get started- you should pee.” he sat down on the bed in front of you. You looked at him confused, brows furrowing together but before you could ask he added “In the books, they said for girls - it can feel like…like you need to pee, right before the good part if I do it right. So, if I do do it right- I want you to be able to finish instead of worrying if you’ll pee on me, so I figured if you go pee now then-” you held your hand up, shaking your head as you stood.
“No further info needed” you said as you padded off to the bathroom. Even though the shower you had taken not even an hour prior to him coming over was so thorough made you fresh as the day you were born you still wiped up with babywipes before coming back to see 2 granola bars and 2 bottles of water on the nightstand. “Are you planning on making me pass out or something?” you joked, sitting back on the towel like before.
He chuckled a bit “Well if i’m that good my first time it’ll be a record or something I bet” he rubbed his forearm nervously “So um..should we kiss? Like last time?” he asked, averting your gaze. You didn’t know this, but he thought he was genuinely about to have a heart attack, and the only reason he was continuing instead of asking you to call an ambulance was because if he was to die in your bed while making out because of the sheer excitement that came with the potential of you touching his dick, he would have died happy.
The question being asked in that soft, sweet tone of his- syrupy and honest, made your stomach flip- and there was a pang of warmth to your heat that made your heart jump to your throat with anticipation. You couldn’t answer, instead, you just nodded, not breaking his gaze. Jesus fucking Christ those eyes. You had only seen the ocean once, in Hawaii on a vacation. His eyes made you think of the waters in Maui, that was how blue. You could get lost in them like they were the ocean, they often rendered you speechless, like he could peer into your soul. “Okay” he said gently.
This time, the kisses started small. He gently pecked the corner of your lips, before you remembered that yes you had a job to do here as well, and you put your hand gently on the side of his cheek, barely touching him. He could feel you shaking, so he put his hand over yours, gently squeezing your four fingers as his lips captured yours in a tender, affectionate kiss. The feeling was so…different then last time. This time felt much more purposeful, and not in the get it over with way, in the i’ve been meaning to do this, way.
Honestly, the feeling made you dizzy. Not dizzy in the kind of way that immediately made you want to throw up, -
(Carmy learned you got very motion sick very quick at your 15th birthday party when he, Mike, Natalie, and Richie were teaching you how to play dead-man on the trampoline and within 10 seconds of being bounced with your eyes closed by the 4 of them you were scrambling to throw up a mix of cake and pasta)
- but dizzy in the way that you weren't forming any kind of memory of the encounter, and you also weren’t sure what you were doing - but you came to with your shirt off, dry humping your best friend as he laid sprawled over your floral duvet panting into each others mouths as your childhood teddybear watched the two of you manhandle eachother, he honestly looked like he was judging, but you mentally told him to fuck off.
“Yeah-” he breathed, his cheeks were a pretty pink, his pupils “I-I think that was um…better then last time. Do you feel hot? I feel hot” he admitted, swallowing hard as you both caught your breath. You looked down and oh, yeah - he's still fully dressed. You were still mostly dressed, too. Well, your shirt - you hadn’t a clue where it went, but your fluffy pajama pants were still suffocating your thighs and holy shit..
He is hard as a rock against your clothed pussy right now.
You look back up at him, and nod in agreement. “Feels like - wow- yeah. Uh- m’hot” you got up and saw the evidence of his arousal straining against his jeans. “Uh- so…” you trail off
“I think i’m supposed to do that part” he sat up, taking his shirt off in that silly boyish way with one fluid motion pulling it up over the back of his head, his sandy blonde hair becoming ruffled by the action. You look over his chest, not even bothering to not stare. That was the point of this whole thing right, to experience? In turn, he crossed his arms shyly, to be expected. Carmy had been open about his upset that he got more of his moms genes then his dads. He was short, softer-jawed, smaller-lipped, and bigger-eyed, the only thing he got was the big Italian Berzatto nose.
His brother was tall, much broader, was able to grow a full face of stubble by 17. Carmy was still patchy, but he was proud of his little patch of curly brown hair in the middle of his chest. Mike kept telling him he would ‘grow like a weed’ as soon as he turned 20, he didn’t believe it, though.
“Oh- yea? Thats what they said in your sex books” you teased and stepped forward, between his spread thighs, likely to give his dick breathing room. His hands found your hips as he snorted a chuckle
“Shut up” he smiled and carefully pulled down the waistband of your pajama bottoms. “I did read…” he helped you step out of them, hands trailing up the backs of your now bare thighs. The action made goosebumps appear on your flesh, nearly made you shiver. “That you are supposed to cum first, it’s like…a warm up.” he explained, looking up at you as he made his way to hold your hips again. You realized quickly, that his hands were also trembling, and he kept stroking and petting you hoping you wouldn’t notice as much.
Your panties had a dark spot on them that he became fixated on momentarily, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. You felt that twitching at his words, your hole clenching around absolutely nothing. You weren’t sure you could remember what color the sky was if someone asked at that moment, you were so focused on Carmy, it was like you two and this bedroom were the only things in the universe. “I haven’t been able to do it, I don’t think you’ll be able to - but you can try. How do you want to do this should I just lay down and I dunno… you stick it in? I got 3 boxes of condoms, different kinds just in case” you went to open your nightstand and he stopped you, grabbing your hand.
He chuckled a bit, you took it as a you don’t know what you’re doing, let me explain kind of laugh, but really he was just wondering how the following words came out of his mouth “I’m supposed to eat your pussy, could I try?”
You swore your knees went weak. Carmen, Carmen Berzatto wanted to go down on you. Thank god you made sure that department was taken care of so well in preparation. “Uhhh- alright” you sat down on the towel, twiddling your fingers nervously “So- wow uh” you giggle nervously, covering your mouth with your hand.
“Your um..you look pretty, by the way” he said while looking at the duvet. He sounded as nervous as he was when he said that. He had thought you looked pretty from the moment he walked through the door, but was too nervous until you were both literally almost naked to say it. You could hardly believe it, because you did your best to not put in a ton of effort. Sure, you were very well groomed, but you didnt like - dress up or put makeup on or do your hair how you would have wanted, you were in regular bra and panties, and pajamas when he walked in. You were also pretty sure that you had a zit growing on your chin and really hoped he hadn’t noticed.
But, that was exactly why he thought you looked so pretty. He loved that you let him have you like this, well - in both senses. He felt so lucky to be able to see you comfortable, in your element. “Thanks, dork, so do you get the honors of taking my panties too?” you teased. That was the difference between you, when you got nervous you cracked jokes and made fun of him to ease the tension in your own mind - when he got nervous he often got lost in the tension of his own mind causing him to go quiet.
“I do actually, says the book- so lay down” he shoots back in the same teasing tone, a small smile gracing his lips once again. You, and his brother were the only 2 that could pull him out of his head so fast, and so easily. You shook your head, laying back on the pillows he’d set up and spreading your legs, laying your feet flat on the bed. He sat in front of you, running a hand up your leg and feeling over the soft, smooth skin. “You are really soft” he muttered, almost to himself, feeling up your thigh “Do you mind if I kiss you, here?” he asked gently, running a palm over the inner of your thigh. No one had ever touched you there, so the action made you shiver since the area was surprisingly sensitive.
“Sure” you said quietly, watching his every move with wide, curious eyes. You were sure the wet spot on your panties had grown tremendously due to the way you felt dripping down the curve of your ass, thank god for that towel when they come off or my sheets would probably soak through by the end of this. He started at your ankle, leaving gentle pecks and putting your manicured foot on his shoulder as he continued his journey of kissing up your shin, over your knee, not leaving a single part unkissed. If this is what sex was about, you totally got why all your friends were raving about it, because you were being driven absolutely wild and it hadn’t even really started yet.
He kissed up to your thigh, laying down in between your legs. His forearms were wrapped around the plush of your thighs, hugging them as he left kisses over the waistband of your panties. The action made your stomach muscles clench at how good he was making you feel. You needed something to touch you, though. That was the only thing on your mind, but before you could ask - he beat you to it. “Would you be ok with me kissing your middle here?” his voice was husky, breathy. He was gripping your thighs so his hands wouldn't shake, he was fucking panting like he just ran the mile in P.E. and he wasn’t sure why.
His mouth was watering at the smell of you, he had to fucking swallow a mouthful of spit before he could say something. He felt like a fucking starved animal, but he was gathering every polite, gentlemanly fiber of his being to remain kind, gentle. “Please do” you said and without hesitation, he was essentially making out with your cunt through your panties. The sight was filthy, but so sexy it was making your head spin.
Whines and moans were leaving your throat you weren’t even aware of as you watch him, slack jawed and sucking at the fabric of your panties, grunting and moaning at the flavor. “T-take em off…please-” you weren’t sure where the bedroom voice that came out of you came from, but he seemed to like it at the way his eyes rolled and fluttered shut at the way you were begging for him to eat you out.
He sat up just enough to get your panties pulled off, shoving them in the back pocket of his jeans before laying back down and resuming his position. “Taste so, so good, squish, better than I imagined” he said before kissing your mound. The wet clicking sound of your pussy clenching at his words made heat rush your cheeks in embarrassment, but it made his dick twitch against his jeans. “Can I kiss your clit?” he asked, the casualness of his tone made your head fall back on the pillow, covering your face with embarrassed hands at the vulgarity of it all.
“Go ahead, Bear” you said, smile lacing your voice.
“I liked it when you were lookin’ at me, just so you know” he said, spreading you out with his fingers and looking for just a moment, he found it easily as it had grown nearly twice it’s size, peeking out of its hood. He attached his lips to it, just like the book he’d read said to do, and lightly sucked, before flicking his tongue lightly over it. Your hand clamps over your mouth to stifle the cry that left your throat, hips jerking and you grab his hair with your other hand, not even meaning to but tugging.
This caused a moan to leave his throat, which in turn caused his lips to vibrate, and you looked down at him, vision hazy like a dream at the sensation. “God- oh god- feels so good Bear - wow- you’re so good at this” you said, breath heavy and jaw slack “uh-huh” you whine when he pads his tongue over your clit in wide, wet drags. The sounds his mouth was making as he sucked and kissed and lapped at your juices were absolute sin, the hottest shit you’d ever heard.
“D’you like it more when I kiss your clit like I was doin’ or when I run my tongue on it like that?” he asked, sucking at your folds and nose nudging your clit as he waited for an answer.
“Both - Both- everything feels good - you feel so good” you praised, pushing his bangs from his face. He smiled into you proudly, continuing to lick, and suck, and swirl his tongue. It had been a knot building for a while, and it had been about 30 minutes of him doing this, when you felt it. But, all the activities you’d been engaged in the conversation you had before you started slipped your mind. “Fuck- fuck - sorry- I gotta pee” you told him and tried to tug him off
“Y’dont, trust me, just trust me” he said determined, he had told himself before going into this that if he could make you cum, that it would be his prize because per the books he’d read one of the main complaints with women was that their male partners didn’t bother to be sure they finished, so if you never wanted to do this again - he’d pride himself internally forever on be the very first man to ever make you cum.
You whined, back arching to the ceiling and hips dipping back into the bed. You didn’t want him to stop, so you weren’t sure why you were subconsciously trying to wiggle away. Your eyes had been closed for a few moments, and you felt a hand on your stomach, dancing fingers following it. You opened them to see him looking up at you, and his eyes flicker to his hand that was laying palm up on your belly before meeting your gaze again, in a silent ask for you to hold his hand.
Without thinking, you did so, needing to be grounded in that moment. His thumb rubbed soothing strokes on the back of your hand as he built up the speed of his tongue, running it back and forth and up and down, flicking it, sucking on the sensitive nub until your brain turned to mush, and stars filled your vision.
“Carmy Carmy- Oh shit- Yes”
The grand finale only lasted about a minute or two, but by the end your thighs were shaking and you were gasping for breath. “Y’need to breathe, did you forget humans need oxygen to live?” he teased. You’d usually give him a light punch on the shoulder for that, but your whole body felt like warm jelly.
“Shut up” you pant, looking down when you feel your clit twitching every few moments “I think you broke it its like.. Having a seizure or something” you said and you both burst into giggles. After a few moments of comfortable quiet you nudge him with your foot “Hey” he looks up at you “Its your turn now” you said and his brows raised
“Y-you don’t have t’do that, that was sex, so - congratulations we are both not virgins” he wiped his chin on the inside of his arm and sat up. You furrowed your brow
“No- I want to, I can make you cum, too ” you said, in your mind, it was a challenge - and when it came out of your mouth you realized how it sounded.
“Are you… asking me for permission to suck my dick?” he looked at you carefully. Shyly, you just nod. For whatever reason the nature of the room and this particular situation had the two of you acting out of traditional character roles, and he was the one being bold. “I want you to say it, then you can suck my dick” he said and stood up, unbuttoning his jeans and looking at you, brows raised expectantly as he waited for you to do as he asked.
Your throat suddenly felt dry, and you were starting to drip on that damn towel again. “Bear, I wanna suck your cock, Can I please?” you asked, tone innocent yet laced with a confident determination. His breath got caught in his throat, you swore his eyes could have fallen out. He didn’t know the word cock was apart of your very colorful vocabulary, he could have creamed his boxers with the way that the word rolled off of your tongue.
“Sure” he said all too casual and tugged off his jeans, kicking them to the side. He laid down with you, like how he was while you were making out and you got on your knees tugging the waistband of his boxers until his cock came out and kissed his navel, the tip glistening with pre.
“So-” you look at it, mouth watering at the sight. You had never done this, but you were sure that you knew one thing for sure, Carmy had a really pretty cock. You didn’t even realize you were staring until he said
“S’not gonna suck itself, squish.”
Oh, right, that was what you were doing. You grab it and he hissed “Fuckin’ hell- y’tryna rip it off? A little nicer, please” he chuckled a bit and you felt your cheeks heat, loosening your grip.
“Sorry…” you said sheepishly, bending over and licking the tip of it, one slow drag from the back of your tongue to the tip of it, flicking your tongue over the slit your nose scrunching slightly at the new flavor. The action though, had Carm seeing stars and his toes curling.
“Hhhhnnn- oh my fucking god” he rasped. You figured that was a good thing, so you did it again “Squish I-” and again, “yes- fuck” and again, “Squish i-i’m gonna mmmmmffff” he whined, his cock twitching in your hand and leaking pre in a near continuous drip. You had no expirience, so you had no idea what this meant, or that he was trying to warn you. With 3 more slow sensual ball to tip licks, he was shooting cum all over your nose, upper lip, tongue, and chin. You squeak in surprise, sitting up and licking your lips. “Oh- hmmmmfuck- gimme a sec” he groaned, taking over for you and stroking himself, the remainder of his load shooting over his stomach.
You watched in awe as he got himself off, back lightly arched and head fallen back, eyes closed as sexy pants and moans left his lips, along with soft “fuck - thank you, thank you” It was literally the hottest thing you had ever seen. He stopped after a moment, finding his breath and looking up at you, when he saw your milky white chin it both made his softening dick twitch and drew a chuckle from him. “When I keep saying im gonna do something and my dick is leaking like a broken sink it means open up er get out of the splash zone” he joked and grabbed his shirt, wiping your chin and neck.
You laughed, laying back down and sighing contently. “Noted for next time” you said and he fixed his boxers, sitting up and stroking your calf.
“There can be a next time? I mean…. I was hoping so that was really fun, felt really good” he said and you nod, smiling a bit
“Sure, I mean, yeah… but it doesn’t mean we stop like- doing friend stuff, right?” you questioned. As much fun as you had, you could never give up something as treasured as your friendship for something as trivial as sex.
“Oh, absolutely, who else is gonna wait w’me to get the new spiderman comics? And whos gonna feed you when your parents are out of town?” he teased and you rolled you eyes playfully, smiling and shaking your head.
“Love you, dork” you bit your lip as he brought your other ankle to his lips.
“Love y’too, Squish. Can I?” he looked down at your glistening core, before back at you. You bit your lip lightly, you weren’t sure if all men were this enthusiastic about eating pussy - but you were thankful that he was because your mind was still swimming from the last time and you had to experience it again.
“Mmhmm” you spread your legs wider for him and he took your hand, lacing his fingers with yours as he got to work. You had found quickly that when you tell him something feels good or he’s doing a good job that it really got him going. It was cute, truly, how he loved being praised, so you made sure to do it whenever you could get something out that wasn't a babbled, coherent mess since the pleasure he was providing was causing your brain to short circuit.
An hour and a half and 3 orgasms later, after about 10 minutes of trying to catch your breath and cool down since you were boiling from the blood coursing your system like an F1 racetrack, you sit up. “M’gonna go get cleaned up” you said, going to get up on wobbly legs.
“No! No, I got it lay down don’worry” he said and made his way to the bathroom. He came back with babywipes and a wet wash cloth, as well as a dry clean towel to wipe off with after. He helped you wipe up and knowing your bedroom by heart, he went over to your dresser and got you a fresh set of panties and a tshirt, as well as a pair of his sweatpants so you could both be comfortable. After you had both gotten dressed, he laid in your bed after bringing the towel downstairs to the wash for you both as well as your dirty clothes, and you cuddled into his chest as you turned on your little tv, playing the next episode of Glee and he hands you a granola bar after being sure you had a few sips of water to replenish.
“To no longer being virgins, hm?” he smiled a bit, holding his bar up in a silly idea of a toast. You tap yours to his with a grin
“To no longer being virgins”
Part 2 here
#Capri's Moots : Dirty Olive Martini <3#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen x reader#carmen berzatto x you#carmen berzatto#the bear fx#carmy berzatto#the bear fic#the bear#the bear hulu#carmen berzatto fanfiction#the bear fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfiction#carmen berzatto fluff#the bear carmen#carmen berzatto blurb#carmen berzatto smut#carmy berzatto smut#carmy the bear#carmy x reader#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy#carmy x you#carmy smut#carmy x fem!reader#carmen berzatto the bear fanfiction#carmen berzatto the bear#borders & banners by saradika#capricarmy oneshot
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Number 6 is kind of a random post!
Random things that I frequently forget exist and are canon in Tcf/lcf
1. Choi Han canonically has three ancient powers.
2. The exact words Eruhaben used to describe Cale’s face are “a bit fancy.” What’s even better is, from that phrase alone, Alberu is immediately able to deduce that it is Cale he is talking about.
3. Rasheel beat the crap out of Dorph and the lion was never heard from again(not in any significance or that I remember anyway. It’s been a hot minute since I read the end of part 1).
4. Ron and Beacrox never had their housewarming party. Cale and Raon even said they would bring gifts.
5. Alberu has other half siblings aside from Robbit and the third prince(who still doesn’t have a name).
6. Lee Chul Min of Earth 1 became a guild leader.
7. Hubesha exists. Add onto that, Priest Gersey exists(I know, I know, they are major antagonists in the later parts of part 1, but it’s been a while ok?)
8. Cale left a priest robe for Clopeh to find, along with a note. Clopeh probably still has it. I’d wager that’s one of the first items on display in the future museum he establishes.
9. (Mentions part 2!!!!!!———>) So far the only person to hide in the ceiling without being uncovered(not undiscovered tho) was that random tail Imperial Prince Adin put on Cale when the Roan envoy arrived at the Empire. This includes xxxx xxxx xxx and Cale himself.
10. Hannah could technically be the youngest swordmaster. Choi Han is over 100 years old and Bud is in his mid thirties. (Of course, that also depends on how skilled Clopeh was at her age too).
11. Cale smacks Beacrox on the head. He then proceeds to dump water on him. He then pats Beacrox’s head with a ‘disgustingly gentle expression.’ Lol.
12. Cale plots his own demise at one point(I could never forget this gem, but every once in a while I just get so surprised that it’s canon and not some sort of crack fic. Not to mention Alberu feeling like he lost to WS because Cale said his cookies were better).
13. Alberu brews tea as a hobby.
14. During the test where Cale is invisible, when they meet Eruhaben but he’s been tricked by the WS/SG, Eruhaben and Raon are about to fight. Meanwhile Cale is, of all places, curled up in a ball between them. Like, why would you just sit there?! Ik he can’t be seen or touched, but still! Also Eruhaben called him a rat. :(
15. On and Cale go on a father-daughter undercover mission disguised as academy students. (I would actually really like to read a fic where they go undercover at an academy in their world, not a crossover or au.
16. Taerang came from Earth 3, right? So hypothetically, since there is a Kim Rok Soo on Earth 1 and 2, does that mean there’s also one on Earth 3? Just something I like to think about. Also, it’s supposedly a mashup of Earth and Cale’s current world, right? So hypothetically speaking, does that mean that both Kim Rok Soo and all of the characters from The Birth of a Hero could possibly exist in one world? I just think that’s cool. I’d like to see that.
17. Cale was gifted an evil sword/dagger from the former Emperor of Mogoru. According to Raon, it has an ‘evil aura.’ Though he does give it back, and I genuinely can’t remember it being of any significance since then.
18. They roleplay going on a walk/ having a picnic in front of the secret entrance to the basement of the Alchemist Bell Tower.
19. Canonically, members of the Penguin tribe apparently waddle around in black outfits and make the best butlers, as stated by Whitiria. Because if that doesn’t scream fantasy cliche I don’t know what does.
20. Cale has two different fears at the beginning and during the war with WS. One is to be the last one alive at the end of the battles, similar to his life as Kim Rok Soo; the other is for his life as Cale Henituse to be just a dream. Both are extremely sad and so like him. It’s not really something I forgot, but it’s also something I think the fandom just doesn’t talk about enough. Like, we all know(and love) to talk about the test on Wind Island, but what about the illusion Elisneh traps him in? To imagine himself waking up as Kim Rok Soo the day after; like all that he experienced, his entire family he built, was all just a dream? That’s heart wrenching. That for me is genuinely one of the most impactful moments in the novel.
Now spoilers for part 2 for those who don’t know what I was talking about on number 9.
///////////////
Cale and Choi Han were discovered in the ceiling by the WS when they sneak into the Dubori territory Capital. Funnily enough though, the only reason Choi Jung Soo was discovered was because he was so shocked by Cale coughing up blood that he was discovered by the Carnage Demon and then they fell through the ceiling.
///
Edit: I edited some of these cuz they’re not actually accurate. In case anyone’s wondering.
#lcf#lout of count’s family#tcf#trash of the count's family#rraes lcf countdown2024#cale henituse#kim rok soo#eruhaben#alberu crossman#choi han#choi jung soo#raon miru#also let me know if I’m going overboard with the read more break#I just think these (aside from 5) are kinda long and I’m trying to make it easier to navigate
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Wing Man: Epilogue
Fic Summary: Steve ‘the Hair’ Harrington is your best friend, and is constantly striking out. Sick of this, you two make a deal; you’ll wing man for each other. Hooking Steve up with dates is easy, but he finds himself struggling to find you a date. At least, until Dustin starts talking about his new cool friend Eddie.
Chapter Summary: Corroded Coffin takes flight, and you're on air.
1.4k Words
(Master List 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15)
“Oh, is it on? Sorry about that everyone! You’d think after a year on air I’d get this cue right, but apparently we’re still working out some of the technical bugs for getting that timing right. Anyway, welcome back to LTRD, The Right Road to Good Music.”
That was a lie, you hadn’t missed the cue. You had only ever missed the cue once on your first week on air, and the few listeners had found it so funny that you had been instructed to keep it as a bit. The radio persona you put on was a bit more air-headed than you might have picked out for yourself, but you had fun with it.
In all the time you had tried to be on stage, who knew that you’d do better when no one could see you? The sound mixers not-withstanding, of course.
“In studio today we actually have Eddie Munson of Corroded Coffin fame here to tell us about their new studio album.” You smiled across the table at your boyfriend, who was leaning back casually in his chair, as if he’d done this a hundred times.
And he might as well have with how many times you two went over everything the past week to get ready for this interview.
“It was going to be a garage album, but it turns out the studio doesn’t want everything recorded on a tape recorder.” He gave you a winning smile that still gave you butterflies, even now a little over a year later.
“With the way your popularity has taken off in the area, I’m sure more than a few people would be willing to shell out for that.”
“Maybe, but we aren’t shell outs.” Eddie looked at you with the biggest grin and you had to take a deep breath. That had NOT been in your practice, and you were so mad that stupid joke almost made you laugh.
“Welp, this has been a good interview, but we’re gonna have to cut it short- I’m joking, Merv.” You said to the station director who was shooting you a look. “So, tell us about the new album.”
“Thanks for having me on to talk about this.” Eddie said, fiddling with one of his rings. His hair had grown even longer in the past year, falling down just passed his chest now. His arms had a few more tattoos, and you knew from up close and personal experience that his thighs now had a few very nice pieces. You tried not to think about that while you were on air. “The new album is coming out this October, and it’s called Fire Shroud. The whole album is heavily inspired by a Dungeons and Dragons campaign that we all played together a few years ago.”
“Dungeons and Dragons?” you asked, pretending to know less than you did for the sake of the interview. “Pretty brave to say that on air. I think we had a few people storm the phone lines a few weeks ago for dating to mention the game.”
Eddie grabbed the mic and pulled it closer to him. “I want people to know that enjoying fantasy, using your imagination, and learning basic math isn’t even close to the Satanic bullshit people say it is- wait, can I say that on air?”
You looked at the clock, it was just passed 1 am. “Fuck no.” you smiled at him.
“Good.” he continued. “Listen, whatever freaky sacrificial rituals I do, happen in my off time when I’m not playing music or running a game.”
“I take it that the blood just gets all over the game board?”
“I spend so long painting my game pieces, so I don’t like getting blood on my hard work.”
The interview went on like this for a while, and you and Eddie effortlessly went through the basic points that you two needed to hit. The albums release, how excited Corroded Coffin was to be working on this, and how excited they were to hopefully put the game that meant so much to them in a better light.
“So, if anyone wants to come see Corroded Coffin live, where can they go to see you?”
“We’re actually playing a few venues and theaters in the Indianapolis area next month, we’ll be sharing the stage with a few other bands. We are also going to be helping out with one of the shows at the latest Rocky Horror Picture Show revival soon.”
Columbia (you were sure Robin told you her real name at some point, but she would always be Columbia in your mind), had staged a coup after the theater had been handed over to Left Turn. She had taken the remaining members and had gone to another theater. When news about Corroded Coffin’s graduation take-over hit, she had Robin reach out to you and you had talked to Eddie and everything came together pretty easily from there. It would only be for one night, but you found yourself really looking forward to seeing the show again.
Merve signaled at you to wrap it up, and when the light went off you sighed and sagged in your seat. Eddie got up to get you some coffee, and you were thankful for that. Being a late night radio host had made your sleep schedule a bit weird, but you wouldn’t change it for the world.
“Are we still on for breakfast when you get off?” He asked. “Still doing a double date with Steve and his latest girlfriend?”
You snorted. “As far as I know. He might sleep in again and miss it.”
“Well, if he does then we’ll just get breakfast to go and I can keep you to myself then.” Eddie said. “I’ll need a nap after this.”
“You know, you don’t have to stick around. You can go home and get some sleep.” you suggested. “Just because I’m here all night, it doesn’t mean that you have to be. You already spend most of your time down the hall with the rest of the boys.”
“I gotta make sure no creeps call in and try and flirt with you.” he said. “Not while I’m here.”
“Eddie, I do this five nights a week, and I’ve only had, what, maybe 3 creeps call in and most times Merv is able to catch them before they make it on air.” You reached up and scratched at his scalp. “I appreciate the concern, though.”
Eddie yawned and closed his eyes. “I’m not leaving.” he mumbled, his eyes closing. “If I go home, I know I’ll miss picking you up.”
“We drove here separately.” you laughed. “Go take a nap on the couch in the break room. I’ll wake you up when it’s time to go.”
“Fine, but I’m taking your blanket.” He said, grabbing the fleece that was draped over your chair. Eddie leaned in and gave you a kiss. “Knock ‘em dead, baby.”
“Only if you bury them.” you smiled back at him.
The night went on with music, call-ins, news, and weather. When the first rays of morning light peaked through the windows of Left Turn Studios, you signed off, got your notes from Merv, and went to the break room where your boyfriend was already nursing a room temperature cup of coffee.
“Let’s get you some real coffee.” you took the flimsy cup away from him and tossed it in the trash.
Eddie stood up and leaned in and kissed you, his hand cupping your jaw. You hummed against his lips and wrapped your arms around his waist.
“What was that for?” you asked as he pulled back.
“It’s a better wake up than shitty coffee.” He said, kissing your forehead. “But now I want mediocre coffee.”
It was a surprisingly cool morning as the two of you stepped out of the studio. You said your hellos to the morning shift as they filed in, and Eddie walked you to your car. “See you at the diner. If Harrington doesn’t show up within fifteen minutes, we’re taking our food to go.”
“Can’t argue with that.” You agreed.
Within an hour, you were dozing off on Eddie’s chest in bed together. Your leftover breakfast pushed to the side as MTV played some song that you were glad you didn’t have to put on your show. Eddie’s arm was around your shoulders and tracing patterns absently against your skin.
There had once been a time where you felt like a fish out of water, and then later you could breathe. Now, so long after making the dumb little deal with Steve you realized you weren’t meant for the land or sea.
From now on, you could fly.
a/n: The End
Dividers by: @strangergraphics
Tag List @k8loo @terrormonster55 @sp1dyb0y1008 @crocwork-clockodile @ali-r3n
@mxcheese @josephquinnschesthair @gagasbee @peaches-roses-sins @witchwolflea
@vintagehellfire @royale1803 @cumslutforaemond @prestinalove @browneyedgirly93
@perpetualmessmachine @thebook-hobbit @cultish-corner @grishaversecaptivated @sortagaysortahigh
@siriuslysmoking @huffledor-able541 @pookiesnatcher @eddiesguitarskills @browneyes-8288
@sheneedsrocknroll92 @kores-mun-son-n-more @eddiebuttcheeks @kirsteng42 @dreamerjj
@moonisu @em022O @cosmorant @kurdtbean
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I identify AS a lesbian , that is how I perceive myself and what to me is a truth about my personal and full lived experience, I adore butches and specifically MY butch. I was known to be a lesbian at a very young age. I only had crushes on little girls, i had a huge crush on my lesbian aunts butch partner and I was not good at hiding this. (Very cute photo of me staring at Lisa available at request) I didn’t behave like a lot of little girls, I was a tomboy, I was also very clearly lesbian and this lead to being “othered” a lot , especially by adults who did not want me around their children because of my homosexuality
At age 11 I was diagnosed with gender identity disorder, and at 12 I started going by he/him pronouns and the name Oliver at my Ohio public middle school. I was technically out as agender but did later identify as a trans boy/trans man. In my teen years trauma and dysphoria complicated things for me, I dated much older women and afab NB people who did a lot of emotional damage to me , and with my trauma around lesbianism I ended up identifying as a gay trans man for a long while. From 16 to 21, this is what I considered myself publicly - though I’ll admit that on some level I always knew deep down I was a lesbian, and that I was sort of making this identify for myself to fight against that.
I identify WITH gay men , because for many years I thought that is who was, I took testosterone, which I don’t regret at all btw and would and maybe will take again one day, I love being a t lesbian- - I was with gay men intimately, both my age and much older, i was bullied for being both a lesbian and a gay man at the same time because again, I transitioned in a semi rural Ohio public middle and highschool setting starting in the year 2012/2013. i was in gay mens spaces in real life, I felt very real community with gay men and they never treated me very differently than other gay boys just for being transmasculine. Sex with them was not emotionally fulfilling me, but I did enjoy their company and companionship for a while I thought I may be asexual. (Don’t so many of us, lmao)
But No, I was most certainly a lesbian with too much trauma hanging onto that label to connect to it for a while (and many people in my direct personal life kept informing me of this, lmao, which made me double down in a very childish way)
Me and my partner are both afab and identify personally as lesbians- but on many occasions we are perceived socially as gay men because we both previously identified as gay trans men, took t and socially transitioned. Then we dated each other. I told Theo about a year in I thought I may be a lesbian and that transmasculinity to me was an extension of a lesbian gender identity and I didn’t want them to feel invalidated by this as they at the time were a binary trans man to my knowledge. They told me they felt the same way and we had one of the most eye opening and relationship strengthening conversations we’ve ever had. We’re both lesbians , with dysphoria, with no connection to a male identity- just a masculine one.
So were lesbians, who look like gay men and often are regarded as gay men by strangers , we’ve experienced homophobic violence geared toward gay men, other lesbians tend to recognize us as lesbians, but gay men - especially trans men and especially t4t trans men also recognize us as gay trans men socially - and im okay with that! i actually LIKE that.
I don’t care if people see us a lesbians or gay men or both. I have community in both places, I feel safe in both places, I have love for both communities. I have lived in both communities, been fostered and loved in both and don’t feel these communities in real life are half as separated as the internet leads many of you to believe. I was in the gay bar scene at too young an age but I am thankful for the community I feel as someone with what a lot of people could consider a pretty complex gender identity now that I’m an adult still in those spaces
And now that I’m experiencing a sort of complex gender fluidity I could only best describe as “genderfluid but the genders are ‘butch’ and ‘femme’ as genders, not male and female” where I’m exploring femme identity and my relationship to butchness is shifting back and forth, I feel a new strange sort of identification happening to me wherein a lot of people in this irl space are assuming im some sort of drag queen - which I’m ??? Not entirely sure how I feel about but i think I’m overall okay with it in a Chappell Roan femininity is performance sort of way
In short what I’m saying is : my gender is lesbian, but I am aware my SOCIALLY PERCEIVED gender is often that of a gay man, and other queer people seem to vary widely in how they perceive me and my relationship on a scale of “lesbians” to “t4t” to “gay men” often reflecting their own identity
And I’m like! Okay with that and acknowledge these identities as also being a valid part of who I am because they affect the way other people treat me in these spaces I share and the life I live.
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Frieren timeline
The only timeline available on the wiki isn’t super fleshed out with exact dates and counting backwards etc. So I decided to make my own.
Notes:
1. Spoilers for up to manga ch119 (the most recent at this time)
2. Even if it’s likely just a rough measure (“three hundred years ago”), I’m gonna assume when doing my math that it was exactly 300 years, because otherwise I can’t do most of the math
3. I skip most events that don’t have an exact year, eg Fern and Stark respective being taken in by Heiter and Eisen. I do make some estimates (eg Sein’s birthday, we only know he’s in mid-30s so he can’t have been born any further back than year xx).
4. Standardised year 0 as the year the demon king was defeated
5. Realised about 2/3rds through that I could be writing down chapter citations but at that point it was too late lol sorry
behold!
-3,000: Earliest mentioned date, by Frieren re: dwarf beliefs; most people believed the dead turn to dust, so pre-Goddess. Unclear when Goddess actually starts appearing.
[Emperor Boshaft alive, so is Milliarde, Frieren in village]
-1,000: Frieren becomes Flamme’s apprentice
-950: Flamme passes away*
-510: the last time Frieren fought a demon (quite likely Macht, as in year 80 she says 600 years ago, which would be -520. What’s a decade here and there?)
-420: Frieren restores her golden arm
-422: Aura became one of the seven sages of destruction
-322: the last time Frieren saw another elf, Grandfather Voll starts to protect village
-222: the last time Kraft saw another elf
-120: Fass finds Emperor Boshaft’s alcohol, Gehn starts working on his village’s bridge
-26: Himmel is born
-11?: Hero of the South visits Frieren and dies a year later; tells her she’ll meet Himmel soon**
-10: Hero Party sets out from capital
[Hero Party kills Immortal Bose and pushes back Aura sometime during this period]
-3: Goddess arc (Himmel is 23), Hero Party seals Qual***
0: Demon King defeated, Era Meteors, Macht starts to serve^
2: Denken born
20: Macht is braceleted
28: Continental Magic Association started (at latest), Lernen was first first-class mage
29: Denken came to Auberst with his wife (who died when he was in his twenties); Denken’s wife presumably passed away very soon after
30: last sighting of a Darkness Dragon (per random apothecary); Weis turned to gold and sealed
39: Earliest possible Sein birthday (he would be 40); humanity learns to fly
45: Wirbel born
50: 2nd Era Meteors; Himmel passes away; Aura reappears, demon activity increases in north and baby Wirbel makes promise
61: Stark is born earlier in the year after winter; Fern is born some time after harvest festival but before the last three months of the year
68: Graf Granat’s son dies in war against Aura
69: Sein’s friend Gorilla left
70: Frieren and Fern meet
74: Heiter collapses
75: Stark runs away from Eisen
76: Heiter passes away; Frieren and Fern set out on their journey
76.5: half a year spent looking for blue moonweed
77: Fern turns 16 (after spring, latest autumn)
78: 3+ Months spent at seaside town cleaning beach
79: wintered with Kraft, Stark’s 18th bday (after spring), meet Sein around harvest festival (time is a bit funky since it gets cold and then warm after this?)^^
80: El Dorado arc
81: first chapter after El Dorado. As of ch119, we are here, 31 years after Hero Himmel’s death!
and in the future…
97: Tod’s “curse” will engulf the star?
100: Next meteor shower. Fern and Stark would be 39.
149: Frieren promised to be back at hero’s sword village by this time
1079: Frieren may return to the Continental Mage Association :)
*Assuming she died soon after Frieren’s last shown convo with her where she said “it’s only been 50 years”
**Unclear just when was the Frieren/Hero of the South meeting, so it could technically be anywhere before, but -11 is the most recent it could be
***Frieren says it’s been 80 years in year 77. If she’s being precise then this is the date—but I have doubts as Qual was sealed in the Central Lands, and Hero Party should be well into the Northern Plateau near the goddess monument by this point.
^Technically I think Macht starts to serve a leetle bit before the demon king is defeated, but no time frame given for how long it took Macht and Glück to have those convos
^^To be more precise: they start the year’s winter with Kraft. Then it gets warm, and Stark’s birthday happens. Harvest festivals are usually in autumn, which is when they meet Sein, and then it gets cold enough for the gang to wear their winter gear again, and they spend a winter (or a cold snap?) with Sein. When they get to Auberst they spend an additional two months training with Fern while waiting for the exam to start. But when they finally leave Auberst in ch61, and aren’t wearing their winter clothes anymore, it’s still listed as 29 years post-Himmel death??? There’s a mention of it being because they’re in the volcanic belt… But seriously, year 79 goes on and on. I honestly think the authors just forgot to find a good spot to switch that over lol
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Can Anybody See Me? Part 19
Hello, hello. While this is technically Steve’s first performance, you won’t actually get to see him act until later. There are plot reasons why. Like ‘planned from the very beginning, the whole reason for this story in the first place’ reasons why. ;) But Steve gets some good news.
And for those of you who missed the poll and it’s results, this story is going to be running until the end of season 4 (or potentially season 5 depending how long this takes). I will be prioritizing the shorter fics for posting because they will get done long before this one will, but I will still keep updating it.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18
*
Steve woke up the following morning feeling relaxed and more than a little pleased with himself. His body was humming with a nervous energy and he was giddy with it. He double checked his backpack to make sure he had everything he needed for today and then dashed out the door.
Today was his first performance and he couldn’t wait. He pulled into the parking lot of the school and hopped out. The only downside to this whole performance thing that he could see was that he was missing out on swimming class all week. Coach Hall was fine with it especially since Steve wasn’t the only one on the team that was in the play, just the team’s most prominent member. Plus they still had the after school practices.
He pulled up to the school parking lot to see that Eddie was waiting for him. Janice and Marty, too. Once they got to the auditorium, Marty and Eddie went one way and Janice and Steve the other. Steve could feel the hum of excitement vibrating off of everyone in the cast. This is was it, their dress rehearsal.
Thankfully no one threw up, but the kid playing Robert Lee looked a little green. Steve saw the kid playing McNair rubbing his back as he tucked his head between his knees.
The lights dimmed and the bell began to toll. This was it.
*
Steve had stumbled a couple of times, but so had a couple of the others. First time jitters, but Steve was practically jumping up and down afterwards. He and Janice hugged.
“Oh my god,” Steve said. “You were amazing!”
Janice blushed. “Me? Dude, you added a little bit of sass to the part that just...rocked.”
Steve blushed. “I only hope that Miss Lucy feels the same.”
Janice nodded.
They all piled into the choir room and sat nervously waiting for her to come in. Miss Lucy always talked to stage crew first because the notes were shorter and more to the point. “Hey, this light didn’t go off at the right time,” or “hey, you need to hold the light on Hancock a little longer.”
Notes for the actors tended to be a bit more messy. They all tensed up when she walked in, sitting up straighter in their seats.
“Not bad, everyone,” Miss Lucy began. “I saw a lot of little jitters, but that’s normal. Especially since we had a few newcomers this year. But I do have some notes.”
She broke down all her notes and finally came to Steve. Janice held his hand.
“You’re still lacking the strength of emotion needed for the Gen. Washington line,” she said. “You have to really sell it. ‘Lately I’ve had the oddest feeling that he’s been―writing to me.’ Really sell that feeling of intimacy between you and the general.”
A bunch of the kids snickered and Steve blushed.
“What are you, children?” Miss Lucy barked out. “Intimacy isn’t just sex for crying out loud. It’s about knowing someone so closely, so well that you just feel like you’re safe. Like you understand them and they understand you in ways others would struggle with.”
Steve nodded.
“But I loved how cheeky you made Thomson,” she finished. “I would have liked to have to seen that during rehearsals, but I like it. Definitely keep that up.”
“I got in front of the kids and I goofed it up a bit,” Steve explained, blushing.
Miss Lucy laughed. “I can see that. Very nice.”
Steve ducked his head as Janice rubbed back in encouragingly.
Miss Lucy went on with the rest of her notes and then they broke up.
*
They still had to go to their last class of the day. Which Steve had been grateful. The pottery teacher already hated him, and the last thing he wanted was to have to been late or gone because he was pretty damn sure that Mr Lovett would have docked him points on his attendance even though he was supposed to have been excused.
He walked into the class and sat in the back with his head down as usual. One of the girls in the class, Mr Lovett’s pet, Mindy Jones turned around at him sneered.
“Well if it isn’t the fairy,” she drawled. “You take it up the ass now, too?”
Steve’s head rocked back. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Everyone knows drama is for fags and freaks,” Mindy snarled. “And hanging out with Munson...it’s pretty safe to assume you’re both.”
Steve laughed. “You do realize that your favorite actors were in drama school, right? You really think that Tom Cruise, Harrison Ford, or Rob Lowe are gay? That makes no sense.”
She rolled her eyes. “They don’t cake on makeup the way you theater freaks do. Don’t even try and compare the two.”
Steve licked his upper lip and smirked. Thankfully he was saved from answering by the literal bell calling the class to session.
He was doing better in the class, having learned from watching the other students around him. Which made Mr Lovett angrier because he couldn’t dock him in good faith. And Steve knew he didn’t want to test it far enough for his parents to show up at the principal’s office. So the teacher made his life miserable in other ways.
Sneering at his color choices. Scoffing at his rudimentary skills, even though this was a beginner’s class. They all had rudimentary skills, for fuck’s sake. But it never seemed to be good enough for him and he would make sure to praise Mindy in the same breath he degraded Steve.
He didn’t even know why it wasn’t a half year like it was at the middle school. Which chucklefuck decided that yes what this school needed was a year long beginning pottery class? It was horrible.
He suffered through the class and shuffled out, his head throbbing. He slammed into the lockers when Mindy deliberately hip checked him on her way out.
Just then another counselor just happened to be passing by.
“Mr Harrington?” Mr Cole asked, rushing over to help him stand. “Are you all right?”
Steve nodded. “The smell of clay makes my head ache sometimes.”
“Then why are you in the class?” he asked.
Steve frowned and then winced. “Mrs Hall told me I couldn’t change the class.”
Mr Cole blinked. “Last semester. But it’s new semester, Mr Harrington, you should be in a different elective now.”
“It’s not year long like drama or choir?” he asked, confused.
“No, who told it was?”
“Mrs Hall?” Steve said, but it was more like a question. He didn’t understand what was happening.
Mr Cole’s spine straightened and his tongue dragged along his top lip. Steve could feel the anger radiate off the counselor and he gulped.
“Follow me, Mr Harrington,” he said coldly. “I’ll get you sorted out.”
Steve dutifully followed him to his office and sat down. Mr Cole vanished down the hall and a moment or two later he could hear raised voices. Then a third was added.
Two minutes later Principal Higgins and Mr Cole were walking through the door.
“It appears there has been a mix up involving your schedule,” Principal Higgins muttered, looking sidelong at Mr Cole. “Mr Cole will be handling your school file from now on. Have a nice day.”
Principal Higgins left, leaving behind a smug Mr Cole and a baffled Steve.
Mr Cole smiled at Steve. “Just let me pull up the available courses for you and we’ll get you taken care of.”
They went over all the options and decided that since Steve already had all the credits he needed to graduate that he could have a free period instead. And yes that meant if he wanted to, he could go home after lunch on odd days. Or even after his English class if Steve wanted. Mr Cole printed him out a note that he could hand to teachers if they thought he was playing hooky and let Steve go.
“Thanks for this,” Steve said, on his way out.
“You’re welcome,” Mr Cole said with a smile. “It’s our job to make sure kids receive an education, not enact petty vendettas against students.”
Steve nodded and slipped back out into the hall. He made sure he was far enough away before he leapt into the air, whooping and yelling for joy.
*
Steve ran out to the parking lot, hoping Eddie was waiting for him. He nearly slumped over in relief when he saw that he was. He looked around him briefly before launching himself at his boyfriend.
Eddie had to take a step back to catch him so that they wouldn’t fall over.
“Whoa, there, big boy!” he said with a chuckle. “Someone is unusually happy coming from Mr Lovett’s class.”
Steve kissed him soundly. “That’s because I never have to return to that horrible man’s class ever again.”
“And how did you manage that one, sweetheart?” Eddie asked, holding on to the back of Steve’s head as they swayed back and forth.
So Steve explained. “I still don’t know how Coach Hall and Mrs Hall are married. Like you couldn’t find two more diametrically opposing people on the planet.”
Eddie laughed. “One of life’s greatest mysteries. But I’m happy for you, babe. Insanely jealous, too. But mostly happy.”
Steve’s laugh joined his. “Don’t worry though, I won’t cut out on you. I’ll just do my homework during that time so I can spend even more time with my hot boyfriend.”
Eddie tilted his head thoughtfully. “I approve.”
Steve playfully shoved him. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“Yup,” Eddie agreed. “I was just waiting for you in case you needed to bitch about Mr Lovett.”
Steve gave him a quick peck. “And that’s one of the many billion reasons, I adore you.”
Eddie blushed. “Go on, pretty boy. I’ve got homework and you’ve got fit into that tiny Speedo.”
Steve laughed again. He put his bag in the trunk of his car and swapped it for his swim stuff.
He waved at Eddie as drove by. Today was a good day.
***
Part 20 Part 21
Tag List: @shrimply-a-menace @strangersteddierthings @throwbackthrowaway @novelnovella @cursedfoxteeth @babyblender @garden-of-gay @anaibis @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @swimmingbirdrunningrock @steve-the-hairrington @winterbuckwild @spectrum-spectre @matchingbatbites @thing-a-ling @fandemonium-takes-its-toll @artiststarme @sundead @nelotegreitic @gregre369 @butterflysandpeppermint @thedragonsaunt @kodaik97 @messrs-weasley @scarletzgo @deadlydodos @renaissan-vvitch @evix-syne666 @emly03 @justforthedead89 @ashwinmeird @huniibee @phantypurple @stevesbipanic @shucks-yuckyuck @lovelyscot @awkwardgravity1 @bookbinderbitch @reportinglivefromsoda @jinxjinn @chasinggeese @be-the-spark-bitch @kohlraedirectioner @cr0w-culture @xjessicafaithx @whimsicalwitchm @jaywhohasthegay @estrellami-1 @dangdirtydemons @howincrediblysapphicofyou @the-redthread
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It's generally left out in the annals of bad behavior/infidelity in the Gilmore Girls canon, but I just want to review the details of Lorelai's "situationship" with Twilight Dad in season 3 when she is in the midst of lecturing Jess and Rory on proper boyfriend/girlfriend etiquette.
Lorelai meets Alex (aka Twilight Dad) on 3.11, which aired on January 21. She and Alex are third wheels when Sookie meets up with an old friend and accidentally sets up a date with him (this takes place during the episode where Rory and Paris fence and have intense sexual tension). I think he asks her out during this episode.
One week later, on 3.12 (airing on February 28) Lorelai and Alex have a coffee date. They discuss the coffee shop he's opening and his two kids who he shares custody with his ex. He suggests a fishing date, and Lorelai ropes Luke into teaching her how to fish. Bear in mind that she has known Luke has crushed on her for the better part of two years.
Anyway, after this incident, Luke decides to give up on Lorelai and asks Nicole out.
The next episode is 3.13, which is the flashback episode. It airs on February 4. This is Luke and Nicole's first date. Nicole definitely does not spend the night.
3.14 airs on February 11. This is Swan Song, where Lorelai is antsy about Rory and Jess possibly fucking, he gets beaked in the eye by the ghost of Shane, they fight, and at the end of the episode Alexis makes a way too realistic moan into Milo's mouth and Rory goes home and tells Lorelai that she's totally going to do Jess at some point.
So Alex and Lorelai have been going out for three weeks, and they decide to go away together with Sookie and Jackson. Sounds kind of serious. It's also mentioned in this episode that in the one week he's been dating Nicole Luke has been on a bunch of overnight trips to New York and seen a bunch of Broadway plays with his girlfriend. I guess we're supposed to assume there's a time jump here because there's no way he did all that within a week.
I'll also point out here that even though Luke mentions he interrupts Rory and Jess every ten minutes so they don't get around to having sex, if he's also making overnight trips to New York they're probably being left alone in the apartment at night quite a bit. Pair that with the offscreen "movie nights" we hear about later and yeah, uh, I think we can figure out what is taking place because no way is that going on in Lorelai's house unless it's also happening while she's out with Alex.
3.15 is February 18, the hockey episode. Jess doesn't call Rory to arrange a date and Lorelai lectures him on his terrible boyfriend behavior. Then he shows up with hickey tickets (and then some!) and I'm guessing Rory's virginity became fairly technical in the car afterwards.
3.16 is the episode where Paris is rejected from Harvard, which airs on February 25. Lorelai is delighted to know that Rory has not actually had sex and that she has "the good kid". She also makes out with Max and then tells Rory all about it and when Rory asks about poor Twilight Dad, Lorelai says "I don't know." I'm thinking you really should not be giving lectures on morality and proper relationship etiquette, hon. Also two weeks ago the relationship was serious enough to include an overnight weekend, but now it doesn't matter? Huh.
So let's skip ahead to Keg. Max, which is three episodes and two months later, which airs on April 25. I'm assuming there actually was a time jump between Luke and Nicole's first date and the swan episode and these episodes actually took place much closer together than they aired, as there's a lot of stuff going on with Luke finding out Jess is skipping school, steals his car to force him to go, and Jess finally being told he isn't graduating that seems like it would take place much closer in time. Anyway, it seems that Lorelai concludes that her relationship with Twilight Dad is over, because "it's become more intermittent". Does she call him and ask them if their relationship is over? I think we all know the answer to that one. Lorelai tries to push herself on Max after he says no and acts like she's the one that's been affronted when he shoves a table between them. I think there was supposed to be a parallel between Lorelai and Jess crossing boundaries in this episode, although I'm not sure why Lorelai did what she did for any reason other than she felt like it.
I really feel someone who behaves in this manner should not be lecturing her teenage daughter or her boyfriend about what a real relationship looks like, nor should she be evaluating who or who isn't "the good kid" based on what she's been doing. It appears Alex was just cheated on and dropped without explanation as the relationship was getting serious. Rory was fully aware of what was happening and further got the message that it is okay to do this sort of thing if an ex boyfriend enters the picture because if he was yours first, it's okay to cheat with him whenever you feel like it. I'm sure that's not something she's going to take to heart or anything.
Anyway, fair well Twilight Dad. I'm sure you'll have more interesting adventures in the PNW from now on.
#alex lesman#gilmore girls#the misadventures of twilight dad#also thoughts on rory and jess's movie nights
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Actually, woe, an incomplete list of fanfic ideas I eventually want to write be upon ye
( Technically under the list of things that belong in the continuality of Floriography for the Recursive Funeral but 9 times out of 10 can stand on their own without it )
Tang going to work in geoponics like she told Cal she would during the pixie bean event , except now its a week later and she's at an emotional low and her hair is a knotted mess all of the smells, and sounds of geoponics are overwhelming her but she doesn't wanna just give up because she should be able to ignore her feelings like an adult already, and she doesn't want to ask for help because she's not a little girl who needs help anymore, but one of the adults who works in geoponics told her that she can't go work in the fields with her hair loose and it needs to be in a bun or in a tight braid she can tuck away, and she's been sitting at the entrance to one of the domes for like 20 minutes trying not to have a breakdown when Sol shows up. Cue Sol knowing how to help without forcing Tang to accept it or make her like a little kid (even if the genuine and gentle affection that respects her boundries makes her cry a little bit, not that she wants to tell Sol that & they won't push)
Dys and Nomi getting back from an expedition pretty early in their friendship and Nomi's parents having been waiting for them at the depot and oh they are SO excited to see their Nomi Nomi making friends, they were worried that there weren't going to be other kids their age working out in the jungle, because it's so scary and dangerous out there and all that, and wow son you look like a bundle of twigs whens the last time you had a good family meal :) ? And Dys gets pulled into a family dinner at Nomi's before the stun debuff can even wear off. [Tentatively named "Loving Home"]
Teenage Utopia having a Teenager moment on the Stratospheric a bit before her 14th birthday / around Sol's first birthday, where she's upset about [something to mirror the pixie bean stuff that Sol later goes through but like the spin the bottle part not alien bean drugs] because theres so many things (read: kissing and dating) she can't do or take part of because the next youngest Earthborne kid is already 18 and the oldest Shipborne kid is barely 10 - But, luckily, counciler Besk is here just for moments like these! And as always, she knows just what to say and when she just needs to listen, and it really does help Utopia feel better. Thanks stars for that, what would they do without counciler Besk??? [Tentatively named "Special Age"]
Early 20s Cal and Marz watching some romantic couple their age doing something romantic and Cal mentioning Tammy and Marz just turning to him and going "She's been gone a decade Cal, obsessing over your theoretical relationship with a dead 11 year old is getting a little creepy. Like. Seek help. You're 24. " which. Cal does not take gracefully. [Tentatively named "Seek Help"]
A bunch of the planetborne kids keep following Dys around and he asks Tammy about it, and she has to explain to him that he's like catnip to the average 4 year old in the way that batman or dinosaurs are (can't get scared of anything, goes outside and has adventures all day, gets to explore ancient ruins and see all sorts of cool scary aliens, doesn't have follow the rules or listen to anybody). [Tentatively named "Newfound Popularity"]
Anemone coming to dinner at Anne's place in the first time in ages after her mother keeps bothering her about it, and she arrives a little bit earlier than expected and catches the triplets at the end of some sort of argument that she can't hear before its over. Things stay calm for a little bit and Nem keeps being surprised at how much her brothers have grown while shes been focused on the garrison, often not knowing what their hobbies or interests are now, especially prominant with Nimbus as the youngest. It all culminates in the triplets earlier fight coming to the forefront again, at the heart of it being each one of them coping with the loss of Kom and the colony's situation in a very different way and their relationships with eachother deteriorating because of it, all while Anne tries to get them to keep it together so Nem comes back again, and while Nimbus doesn't seem to super react to it and instead keeps trying to get Anemone's attention while he can. [Tentatively named "Family Dinner"]
I might add on to this list later, because it is Not all of the ideas I have, and none of these are ones delving into other chains of timelines or other aus (of which I have... too many concepts...)
#i was a teenage exocolonist#iwatex#god i have no idea what else to tag this as uhhh#wips#yeah that works
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Sinbound- Chapter 11
Summary: It’s been a month since the events of the last chapter: Eddie and Buck are on the outs and Buck’s family is back in town; Something major happens to Y/n.
Warning: Talks of miscarriage.
Series Masterlist
It’s been a month since Eddie and I broke up. It was touch and go for a while. The night of the breakup I asked for 2 hours. It doesn’t take 2 hours to basically pick up your whole life. Alex and I took all our clothes and toiletries but we still had to come back and get the rest of our things. I decided it would be best to leave all the baby’s stuff there, but excluding that I still had a ton of things. Bobby and Athena served as the buffer between Eddie and I. Athena would text me to tell me that Bobby told her Eddie and Christopher would be out of the house from 12-4 pm and stuff like that. Eddie and I still haven’t spoken since that night even though he tried. He gave me a good 2 days before he was blowing up my cell and trying to talk and work things out, but I was serious when I meant Eddie and I were done. The betrayal still keeps me awake at night if I let my mind wander enough and the events starting on the night in question and the big blow up play in my head like a movie. Alex and I moved in with Buck for the time being while I figured out the next step in our lives. Buck was more than happy to welcome us and he’s been accommodating in any way he can. He’s been going with me to my doctor appointments, driving me around a lot since I’ve gotten a little bigger and lazier to do it myself, and even taking a parenting class with me. Even though I had Alex already a lot of things have changed in the last 12 years. Speaking of all the things Buck is doing for me, Eddie is quite pissed at him because of it. Also, the fact that Buck is the one that told me about Eddie’s infidelity. So everything has been quite an adjustment. It was morning and Buck was off today so that meant family breakfast. Which was really more me cooking whatever I was craving and everyone being too lazy to complain or make anything else. Today was chicken, waffles, spicy syrup, bacon, eggs, and french toast. (Don’t judge but I craved this my whole pregnancy.) Buck came down from the room and sat at the table. The reason I call it the room is because technically it’s both Buck and I’s room. See Buck only has two rooms in his loft but the other room is Alex’s and it’s not exactly big enough to share. So Buck and I share the room in the sense that both of our things are there like clothes, shoes, jewelry, little things like that. Buck did buy a couch though, so that way he has something to sleep on. Right now Buck was trying to convince me to go with him and Alex to pick up his parents later. “They would love to see you. I mean it’s been over a year since they last saw you.” “Yeah and since then I got knocked up and then left a single mom. Again.” “True, but you look really cute pregnant and they haven’t seen this glow.” He said, as he pointed his fork at me. “That may be the case but seriously I’m not up for that yet.” Buck could tell my mood was becoming somber, so he let it go. “Alright. Did I tell you guys what happened yesterday at work? Some guy’s kids buried him in the sand and splashed water on him when a freak flash of lightning hit and turned the sand into glass. It was insane.” “Buck I’m trying to eat.” “Mom, that's actually really cool and mother nature at work. What did that guy say in that really old dinosaur movie ‘life always finds a way’. Life is science.” “Did she just call Jurassic Park a really old movie?” I asked Buck. I turned to Alex. “That movie came out the year I was born for your info.” “How do you think I feel? I’m older than you by two years.” Buck joked. The conversation kept flowing from there and eventually it was time to clean up and start the day. Since the break up with Eddie I haven’t really been writing much so my day usually centers around Buck and Alex. I felt like a 50’s housewife. After making sure everyone had everything they needed for their day I would tidy the house, wash dishes, do laundry. It was a feminist nightmare but I was so numb I didn’t really care. I’ve been seeing a therapist but it didn’t help as much as I thought it would. Most people describe therapy as this life-altering interaction but for me it felt like when you were called to the guidance counselor in school about bullying or something. Like I was put on the spot. Don’t get me wrong there was improvement but I just didn’t feel satisfied or “fixed” in a sense. We dived into my relationship issues a lot and I understand what Eddie was saying. The “relationship” that Buck and I had while Eddie and I were still together was emotional cheating, which proved my point. We were bad for each other. Eddie and I both rushed into this relationship after commitment issues on both sides, so we were destined for doom. Either way the pain inside of me from his affair with Ana wasn’t going away because I know that what I did didn’t warrant that. Instead of breaking it off or establishing clear boundaries, Eddie decided that cheating was the best route. So here I am feeling like less than a person over a toxic relationship we both should have some coming to an end. Buck’s POV Since Y/n didn’t want to come with me I was forced to suffer with my parents alone. It was worth it since Albert was there. “Uh, Albert, hey, check this out.” I showed Albert Y/n’s ultrasound picture. It was so cool to be a part of this process and I couldn’t help but show it off. “You brought more than takeout.” Albert replied, “Well, uh, Chimney didn't tell you?” “Yeah, that I've been gone less than a year and you're a father again? No.” God I hope my parents didn’t hear that. “Uh, no, not-not exactly.” “But that's a…” Albert started. “Baby. Buck...?” My mom was suddenly standing behind me. “Is there something you need to tell us? You're gonna be an uncle again!” My mom shouted as she jumped to conclusions. “Phillip! Maddie and Howard are gonna have another baby!” My mom yelled as she went to hug Chimney. “What?” Chim asked, confused. “That's fantastic! I had a feeling when you bought this house.” My dad replied. “I mean, it's a little soon to be pregnant again, but... Why not?!” Mom said. “This is very good news, Howard. Why didn't you tell us sooner? “ Chimney’s stepmom asked. “Uh, guys... Guys, we're... not pregnant.” He said. “You're not?” Mom asked. “No.” “Then who is?” Mom asked as she turned to me. “That’s what I was trying to say. Y/n is pregnant again. It’s a girl.�� “You and Y/n are having another baby?” My dad asked. “No, mom is having a baby with Eddie.” Throughout all the confusion, everyone forgot Alex was sitting at the table on her tablet. “But, they're not together anymore so we're living with dad.” “Okay, let’s not deepdive into it. Give your mom some privacy.” When we got home it was time for a talk about privacy. “So Y/n and living with you while she’s pregnant with another man’s baby?” My dad asked. “And you’re going to help raise the baby?” “It's not like that. We’re not together, I’m just helping her while she figures a few things out. Also, if she wants of course I’ll help raise the baby but we haven’t thought that far ahead. We’re taking things day-by-day.” The way everyone except Maddie, Chimney, and Alex were looking at me I could tell they had a lot to say. “I think it's…” My mom started. “Here we go. “ I knew I was about to get an earful. “Great.” She finished. That shocked me. “Uh, yeah?” “You’re a wonderful father to Alex and I know if you need to be you’ll be a wonderful father to this little girl as well.” Dad replied. “Not only are you a good father but you’re a good man.” My mom said as she stepped towards me for a hug. I wrapped my arms around her. “Here. Dad, you want to see?” I said showing him the sonogram “Oh, absolutely.” He said as he took the phone from me. “Phillip. You are going to allow this?” Howie’s dad asked. “It's not really for me to allow.” Dad replied. “A man cannot raise a child fathered by another man, it's unnatural.” Howie’s father reiterated. “Says the expert in child-rearing, huh? I would think you would relate to Buck's decision. Father them and let someone else raise them.” “Howie.” Albert explained. “Whoa, Chim. It's-it's okay.” I said. “A man who cannot control his family is not a man.” Howie’s dad added to already building tension. “Maybe a man who's too controlling forces his sons to hide from him in another country.” My dad fired back. “Okay, easy. Come on, Dad.” I said. “Children need to learn that actions have consequences.” “I'm sorry, but how is any of this your business?” my mom asked Howie’s dad. “He did announce it to everyone.” Albert’s mom said. ‘Well, that wasn't exactly my choice.” I said, making it clear. “It was a bad choice.” “My dad helping out my mom wasn’t a bad choice, you’re just mean.” Alex called out. “Alex. Honey, you can not talk to adults like that.” “See this is exactly what I am talking about. Your child has no manners and you plan to raise another?” “Oh, that's rich.” My dad replied yet again, kicking everything off. Everyone started to argue until due to a storm the lights went out. “Buck, grab some candles, we got the doors”. Howie called me. As mom played with Jee and Alex, Maddie and I talked. “I think maybe Albert was right.” I said to Maddie. “Oh, I wouldn't say that out loud.” “Ever think about what it might've been like...?” “What?” “If Daniel had lived.” I asked her. “Yeah, sometimes.” “You?” Just then the lights came back on and everyone was relieved. “I think it would've been just like this.” Y/n’s POV (Think of this happening at the same time as Buck’s) I was sitting on the couch after cleaning when I heard a knock on the door. “Did you forget your key or something Buck?” I swung open the door and there stood Eddie. I crossed my arms and clenched my fists tight. The nerve he had to show up here. “What are you doing here Eddie?” “I’m here to talk to you. You haven’t spoken to me in a month. At least not without a third party being involved. I haven’t gone to any of your appointments since then.” “You barely went before so what’s the difference?” “Y/n, how long are we going to do this? Huh? Are we gonna be those parents that drag their kids through hell?” “Don’t do that. I can’t do this right now.” “So when are we going to do this? Talk things out?” “I don’t know Eddie. It’s only been a month.” “We need to talk about this.” “No. I need time. Time away from you. I’ll tell you when I’m ready to talk to you.” I went to shut the door on Eddie but he put his hand there to stop it. “I miss you Y/n. Christopher missed you.” “I miss Christopher too. He’s more than welcome over here, because you’re pissed with Buck you won’t let him over here.” Eddie was quiet. “Eddie, I want to move forward but I need to do it at my own pace. The way you’re behaving isn’t helping. I mean I feel like you aren’t even sorry.” “I am sorry. I will always be sorry for what I did. Not only because I hurt you but because I destroyed everything we built when I did it. I’m so sorry Y/n.” “I hear you Eddie I do, but I still need time. Okay?” “Alright. I’ll go. I love you y/n.” I still loved Eddie but I didn’t know if I was in love with him anymore. “Goodbye, Eddie.” Time went on and eventually Buck came home. “Hey, where’s Alex?” “She’s spending the night at Maddie and Chim’s house.” “I thought the house wasn’t done and what clothes is she going to wear?” “Our daughter is a sneaky one. She put her clothes in my truck along with a sleeping bag. How am I supposed to say no to that?” “I’m sure it’s really easy but she’s got you wrapped around her finger.” “Yeah, she does.” Buck came and sat down beside me on the couch. “So it’s just the two of us tonight, what are we doing? “I was thinking of doing something a little risky…” “Oh really?” “Oh yeah.” “How risky we talking?” “Oh you know, I’m gonna change and slip into something a little more comfortable, and then…” “Then what?” “We’re gonna eat so much ice cream our guts explode and watch trashy reality tv.” “Now that’s what I’m talking about.” Buck said. We’d always had that joking relationship that could be borderline sexual but now that we actually live together the sexual part was definitely a no-no. “I’ll be back.” I went upstairs to change. “What kind of ice cream we doing tonight, Rocky road or fudge?” “Ooh, let’s do a rocky road tonight.” I started to change when I felt a warm sensation in my pants. I looked down at my now ruined pants and noticed blood. I carefully rushed down the stairs. Buck was facing away from me but heard me come down the stairs. “You changed already, that was fast.” He turned around and saw my expression. “What’s the matter?” “I’m bleeding.” I could tell Buck wasn’t catching on to what I was saying. “Like down there.” Buck became a panicked nervous mess. “Oh my god! Okay. Let me grab my shoes and my keys and we’ll throw you in the car.” Before I could say anything he darted off. He looked around the front door and then made his way into the living room. “Where are my shoes? Where are my keys?” “Buck calm down. Your keys are on the hook and your shoes are in the room. I’m gonna put on a pad and change, while I’m doing that, call Dr.Manning.” “Alright.” I went into the room changed and put on a pad in case of more bleeding. When I came back down, Buck was waiting on me. “Dr.Manning is going to meet us at the hospital.” “Okay.” We made our way downstairs and got into the car when I realized I forgot to call Eddie. I went to reach my phone and couldn’t find it. “Buck, can you call Eddie? I left my phone inside the loft.” “Yeah of course.” Buck called Eddie but it went straight to voicemail. “Hey Eddie, I’m taking Y/n to the hospital to see Dr.Manning. Call me back when you get this,” He hung up and turned towards me. “Are you okay? Are you in pain?” “No, I'm doing okay, just the bleeding.” I was trying to keep a leveled head but my mind was racing. It was going to places I didn’t want it to go. “You know when I was pregnant with Alex I had a scare kind of like this. I was in the hospital for 2 days. They said her heart rate was low and there was a chance I could lose her. What if I lose this baby Buck?” My tears were threatening to spill from my eyes. Buck grabbed my hand and caressed it.“Don’t think like that. We’re going to see Dr.Manning and she’s going to tell us that that beautiful baby girl of yours is okay and whatever is happening is probably normal, okay?” “Okay. Thanks Buck.” “Of course.” He said as he kissed my hand. Buck and I arrived at the hospital where Dr.Manning was waiting. She ushered us into the ultrasound room and began to take a sonogram. “Okay, let’s take a look.” She moved the wand around and I saw how she squinted at the screen. “Here’s the baby right here. Let’s hear this heartbeat.” She moved over and I heard her heartbeat. It sounded good or at least I think. “That’s a strong and healthy heart beat right there.” I let out a relieved breath. She moved the wand around more until she stopped at this big blob. “Okay, here’s the problem. You’re suffering from Placenta previa. It’s when the placenta completely or partially covers the opening of the uterus. How bad was the bleeding?” “If I was on my period I would say it’s a light flow.” “And are you still bleeding now.” “No, I don't feel anything.” “I’m gonna keep you here for the rest of the night and monitor everything. In the morning I’ll let you know whether or not you’ll be discharged. Let me just say since it’s your second child it’s more than likely gonna resolve itself. What’s your birthing plan?” “I planned on doing a vaginal birth.” “Okay. We’re going to do more appointments than usual and if this resolves itself we can go ahead with that plan. If not we’re going to have to do a c-section delivery. Okay?” “Alright.” “Dad is more than welcome to stay if he would like. I’m going to make sure a room is prepared and ready for you. Let me know if you need anything.” I didn’t feel like correcting her about Buck in any way. “Okay.” She departed the room and Buck and I sat there almost as if we were waiting on the other person to say something first.” “Do you want me to stay with you?” Buck said, breaking the silence. “Only if you’d like to.” “Of course I would. Do you want me to go home and get anything?” “No I’m okay. It’s just for the night right?” “Right.” Soon a nurse came and brought us to the room we would be staying in for the night and we got comfortable. Sometime throughout the night the anxiety left me and before I knew it I was asleep. I was awoken by a nurse and Dr. Manning coming in. Buck was already awake. “Good morning. How are you feeling?” “I’m fine. Just nervous to be honest.” “Well I have good news, we found nothing concerning while monitoring you over night so that means you can go home. We’ll be having more frequent visits but I’m sure you have nothing to worry about.” “That’s great thanks doc.” Buck replied. “Just doing my job, but this does mean a few things. No moderate or strenuous exercise, heavy lifting, standing for long periods of time and sadly no sexual intercourse or sexual activity that could lead to orgasm. At least until the baby is born.” I wanted to dig a hole so deep and crawl in it. “Any followup questions?” “Nope, I’m good. You got any, Y/n?” Buck replied with a grin. “She’s covered everything. Thanks, we’ll be out of your hair now.” Dr. Manning said her goodbyes to us, leaving alone to brew in the awkwardness. “No sex until the baby gets here. Well I guess there’s no point in you living with me anymore.” I believe that was Buck’s bad attempt at a joke. “Haha, so funny. Besides it’s mostly if the issue doesn’t resolve itself I think.” I don’t know why I answered like it was a serious possibility. “Let’s go. I’m hungry.” I quickly made my way out of the room in order to avoid talking about this any further.
#Eddie Diaz#eddie díaz#eddie diaz x reader#evan buckley#evan buckley x reader#evan buck buckely#911 fic#911 fanfic#911 fandom#911 fox#911 on fox#911
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I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 2
I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 2
Pairing: Joel Miller x OFC “Catie”
Word Count: 2500+
Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!
Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story.
Notes: I just had to write this part 2! It's all fluff and a little heart hurt.
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**Reader is not described
Main Masterlist
Joel Miller Masterlist
<<I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 1
"I just found her. I don't want to lose her so soon." Joel’s eyes are round and worried, tears that he refuses to let fall are building up at the corners.
Benny, Poppy’s long time boyfriend, had finally come to us 4 months after Joel and Ellie moved into Jackson to ask our permission to marry her. It’s not tradition anymore, but Poppy had read it in a book and mentioned how romantic it sounded, so naturally, Benny had to do it. He’d asked Tommy too, as he had been like a father to Poppy since we moved here 10 years ago. I had said yes right away, but Joel clenched his jaw shut, a gruff “No” falling from his downturned lips. I smiled at Benny, telling him to give us some time and sending him out the door.
"She's 20, Joel."
"That's young"
"It is, but not for this world. Lives are cut short every day, so when 2 people love each other, they get married."
His broad shoulders slump, slightly defeated. "... I just got here."
"She's not going anywhere, Joel. Just a few houses down."
His jaw clenches, thoughts racing behind his brown eyes.
"What about this Benny guy?"
"He's a sweet kid. Too much energy to know what to do with, but he loves our daughter more than himself. You know he technically already asked her to marry him."
Joel’s eyes snap to mine. "He what? After making that big of a fuss of asking us-"
"When we first moved here. Poppy was 10, nearly 11 and she had never been around other kids, let alone attend actual school and have neighbors or other people around. Her whole life had been Lucia and I. Benny introduced himself the first day and they became fast friends. I think it was that first week he asked her to marry him."
"What did she say?"
"She laughed and said 'I'm 10. What do I wanna get married for?'"
"Good for her."
"I think there was a bit about "stinky boys" too. But that didn't deter him. They were inseparable. And a few years later, they started dating. I wasn't surprised but she was. And they've been together ever since."
"She loves him?"
"So much. As much as I love you."
HIs face softens, but the scowl remains, one tear betraying him by slowly falling down his cheek. I sit next to him on the couch, placing my hand on his thigh. I don’t say anything, waiting for him to speak.
“I only just found out I had another…I have a daughter. I can’t lose her too.”
I place my hand on his cheek, gently turning his face to mine. I swipe my thumb across his cheek to wipe away a tear, stubble softly scraping my skin as his watery eyes find mine.
“You will never lose her, Joel. She never thought in a million years she would ever meet you. I never-” a lump rises in my throat and I swallow hard “-she has been up your ass these last 4 months for a reason. She loves you, Joel. She’s not going to leave you. Just move a few doors down.”
—----
“I don’t understand why, Uncle Tommy! He knows I love Benny and he loves me.”
Tommy tosses some hay into the stall in front of him before turning to face his niece.
“He’ll come around, don’t worry Pop.”
“I don’t know…he seemed pretty set on saying no. Ugh, and we had this whole thing planned out. I never planned for dad saying no.”
Tommy moves to the next horse stall, repeating the action. “Joel would want to know Benny and he doesn’t. He only just got here-”
“He’s been here for 4 months, Uncle Tommy.”
“Yeah, but he’s spent most of the time with you and your mom. As he should.”
Poppy studies her uncle’s form. “He could’ve just said yes. I mean, Benny and I have been together for forever, but I guess dad is bent on not supporting me.”
Tommy drops the last bit of hay in the stall, hand hesitating over the next bit of hay he’ll have to put down.
“He only just got you, Pop.”
Poppy blows a raspberry. “I’m not going anywhere. Just a few houses down.”
A look washes over Tommy’s face and Poppy sees him fighting back tears.
“It’s different for him. He gets another chance with you.” It’s quiet when Tommy speaks, but he may as well have been yelling. Poppy’s eyes grow wide and she sits there silent for a few moments.
“Sarah.”
Tommy nods, his eyes coming present from the flashback that he had been on. “Sarah.”
Poppy lets out a puff of air. “Guess I’m the stubborn ass, huh?”
Tommy smiles and nudges her shoulder with his. “You come by it honestly.”
—----
The front door opens, Poppy walking in the kitchen shortly after.
“Hey mom.”
“Hey Pop.”
“Is dad home?”
“He is. He’s upstairs. Everything ok?”
Poppy nods. “Yeah.”
Poppy heads upstairs, pausing at the door to her parent’s room before she knocks.
“Dinner ready?”
“It’s me.”
“Oh, Pop. Uh, come on in.”
Poppy enters the room and sees Joel standing in front of the mirror, hair slicked back from the water from his shower. Joel opens his mouth to speak but before he can, Poppy crosses the room and throws her arms around him, squeezing a little. Joel hesitates, momentarily caught off guard by the abrupt display of affection, before wrapping his arms around her and hugging her back.
“I’m not leaving, dad.”
Joel’s grip stiffens slightly before pulling back. “What?”
Poppy looks up at him, love pouring out of her gaze. “Benny has a house for us just a few doors down. I’m not leaving. I only just got you."
Joel is quiet for several moments. “You had Uncle Tommy.”
“I did. But he’s not my dad. You are.”
Joel chokes back tears as he stares into his daughter’s eyes, sad for the years he missed watching her grow.
“Do you love him?”
Poppy smiles. “I do.”
“And does he love you?”
She smiles wider. “He does. He really does, daddy.”
Joel’s jaw clenches, his eyes looking off for a few moments before looking at his daughter.
“Alright, then.”
Poppy’s entire face lights up. “Really? Oh, dad I-”
“Just remind him I’m a really good shot. And so is Uncle Tommy.”
“Psshh, have you seen mom shoot? Benny should be worried about her. Why do you think he sucks up to her?”
Joel chuckles. “As he should.”
—----
Weddings in Jackson are a big event, everyone in town chipping in to help with everything, from decorating to cooking, to making Poppy’s dress. It’s something everyone looks forward to.
Joel stands in the living room, waiting for his daughter to come down the stairs. His hands flex at his sides and he shifts his weight nervously. He glances up at the top of the stairs and his breath catches in his throat, tears immediately welling in the corners of his eyes. She's the spitting image of her mother.
Poppy has on a beautiful white dress, hand-sewn by the seamstress in town. It's floor length, a white pattern of poppies is embroidered into the dress. Her hair is twisted and braided up, whisps framing her face. She wobbles slightly at the top of the stairs, the heels her friend had someone found clicking on each wooden step as she descends. When she reaches the bottom, she turns to Joel, a smile wife on her face.
"Well, dad? Do I look ok?"
"You-" Joel let's out a breath, a smile tugging up the corners of his mouth "-you're absolutely beautiful."
Tears well in her eyes now. "Thanks, dad."
Joel offers her his arm and it's then he notices the butterfly clip in her hair, which isn't really her style.
"Butterfly?" He asks, eyebrows raised in question.
"Oh. Yeah. For Sarah. I wanted a piece of her with me today and mom said she really liked butterflies. This was all I could find. Oh, and Uncle Tommy gave me this."
She pulls out a small photograph, handing it to Joel. He looks down at it and his jaw slams shut, willing his tears to not fall.
Staring up at him, was Sarah, clad in her soccer uniform, a trophy in her hand and Joel standing proudly behind her. He stares at it for several moments before Poppy reaches out, gently taking the photo and sliding it into his coat pocket.
"Now she's definitely with us."
Joel pulls Poppy in, hugging her tightly, trying to hide the tears that had fallen from his eyes.
"It's perfect. She would've loved that."
Poppy hugs her dad back, hiding her own tears. They embrace for a few moments before hearing the music start outside that was their cue to head out the door. Joel pulls back, trying to covertly wipe the tears off his face while his daughter does the same. He offers her his arm again and Poppy takes it, lacing her arm in his.
"Don't let me fall, dad."
"Never. I got you, baby girl."
Joel had faced clickers and much worse. But giving his daughter away that he'd only just met was one of the hardest things he'd had to do. Even Joel had to admit that Benny was perfect for her and loved her fiercely. They were a perfect match.
When he danced with Poppy during the father daughter dance, he could almost picture Sarah, spinning around and laughing as he danced with her too. He knew that she would have loved Poppy.
—---
A couple months after the wedding, Poppy and Benny came over for dinner. We usually had dinner together once a week, Ellie sliding right into our family. She's hilarious and spunky and the thought of Joel having to escort her across the country makes me laugh.
After dinner, Ellie takes off with Dina and the rest of us settle on the couches. Joel offers everyone a drink, even Benny, whom he'd grown fond of over the last few months. Although he'd never admit it.
Poppy takes the glass and holds it, swirling around the contents as she stares at it.
"Actually, Dad…mom… I, well, we want to talk to you."
"I told you, my knees aren't what they used to be. Tommy said he'd help with the roof-"
"No. That's…that's not it." Joel sits next to her and the couch and she turns to face him, mouth opening and closing as if she's trying to figure out how to say something. She takes Joel's hand and squeezes it, looking up at him with her eyes that she inherited from him.
"Dad…I'm pregnant."
"Oh sweetie!" I'm on my feet, crossing the room and throwing my arms around her. "I'm so excited for you! How are you feeling? Is the morning sickness OK? I can't remember how it was with you because of what was happening but I do remember vomiting a lot. Have you gone to Lucia yet? Oh and-"
"Mom, chill. I'm only 6 or 7 weeks along." The smile she gave me falters when she looks back at Joel, who hadn't moved, a hard look on his face.
"Dad? Did you hear what I said?"
Benny shifts in his seat, looking anywhere but at Joel, ready to run if he made a move.
"Dad?" Poppy sits back down, taking his hands again. "You're going to be a grandpa."
That broke him.
"A…grandpa?"
Poppy smiles softly. "Yeah. I mean we won't know if it's a boy or girl until it's born, but if it's a boy, we're naming it Will after Benny's brother. He died a few years after…everything. And if it's a girl…well, we wondered if it would be ok to name her Sarah."
Joel's eyes are wide, big and brown and they stare into his daughter's.
"You'd want to name her Sarah?"
"Yeah. Only if that's ok-"
"I would love that. She would've loved that." He blinks rapidly, ridding his eyes of the tears that had gathered.
"A grandpa. Me. I never thought I'd…" He lets out a laugh, hugging his daughter tightly and shaking Benny's nervous hand.
—----
Several months later, Joel is by his daughter's side at her request, her small hand in his as she squeezes it through another contraction.
"Ok, one more push, Pop, and this baby will be here." Lucia gets ready and nods at Joel and Benny.
"One more push, sweetheart, and we can finally hold our baby." Benny rubs her back up and down, applying pressure to her hips to help alleviate the pain, just as the midwife had shown him.
"I can't! It's too hard!"
Joel leans in, getting level with her face as she rocks back and forth slightly, on all fours.
"I won't pretend this isn't hard as shit. But if it's one thing I do know is that you're as tough as your momma. Probably tougher. And I know you can do this. You got this, baby girl. You've got this." Joel squeezes her hand and she nods, taking a deep breath.
One more push, and their daughter Sarah was born, screaming loudly at the world.
—-
We stayed with them that first night, in case they needed anything at their request. It's late, about 3am or so and I hear the floorboards creaking outside our door. I glance over and see that Joel isn't next to me, so I quietly get up and make my way out of the door. Peeking into Poppy and Benny's room, I see them both sound asleep on the bed, but no Sarah. I head downstairs to the living room, but stop just short of the doorway, listening as Joel's voice carries to me, the song he had been singing ending.
"You know, I wanted to be a singer in another life. Play guitar and all that. I'll teach you someday."
He hums a little tune to Sarah and I poke my head around the corner, taking in the scene in front of me. Joel is standing, bouncing his arms and swaying side to side, all gentle movements as he stares down and the bundle of blankets in his arms, Sarah's small face poking out from between the folds.
"Your aunt would've just melted over you. She loved babies. Was always askin' me when me and your grandma were gonna have one. I'll tell you all about her one day." He pauses, clenching his jaw in an attempt to hold back tears.
"I never knew about your mom until she was already grown. But I promise, I will always be here for you."
Sarah looks so small in his arms, his broad shoulders looking impossibly large as he holds her tiny body to him, smiling down at her as she continues to sleep.
"I got you, baby girl."
—----
A Second Chance (a one shot written by @theewokingdead )>>
General Taglist:
@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe @greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @giuliarogers @icanbeyourjedi @wretchedmo @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso @theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz @dirtytissuebox @gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @sarahmilesbendrix @booksarekindaneat @mrsudontknowme @swol-bear @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox @amneris21 @gooddaykate @alindeluce @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711 @harriedandharassed @ladykatakuri @marrianena @practicalghost @withakindheartx @batdarkladyvampir @justanotherkpopstanlol @mermaidxatxheart @alexxavicry @ichigodjarin @justreblogginfics
#joel miller#tlou#joel miller x you#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x reader#tlou fanfic#tlouff#The last of us#the last of us fanfic#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal character fanfic#pedro pascal character ff#pedro pascal character fanfiction
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”headcanons for Reigen and his childhood”
—@princeasimdiya12 resquested these through message :)
Little Reigen was probably a little silly :3 who also probably went through some stuff ⚠️ TW: angst
To start off on a good note I wanna go ahead and say if somebody were to ask him ‘how was your childhood’ he’d respond “it was good, I had a good home n’ my mom was the best cook 😼, my dad always played ball with me too👌” although it’s much deeper than that, he isn’t lying technically.
Anyway on to the sillies :3 His mom actually is a really good cook 😍👩🍳 she could cook and bake in fact 😚 (when she didn’t burn the deserts <3) yeah idk what happened but she always just seemed to forget she was baking?? But she didn’t forget when she was cooking….? Idk 🤷♀️ Maybe because sometimes baking takes longer in the oven? Again- idk, but it never broke out into a fire so that’s good….although they had to leave the house cuz all the smoke 😁 which leads me to say his mom would end up telling the neighbors (they lived in apartment when he was real young, like up til 7) so they could get out too (cuz smoke like- slips through the cracks of the doors). Everyone opens the windows and doors until it airs out. Before then everyone’s outside relaxing or playing. (Reigen and his dad was the only ones playing).
The couple upstairs was a young couple with no children and there was a old married couple downstairs. Which essentially means Reigen didn’t grow up with other children, at least in his apartment. On the block, yeah but they either weren’t cool with him or were older kids. So yeah, Reigen mostly played with his father. They’d play baseball a lot and Reigen was the batter but he always got hit in the face whenever his dad pitched 😚👍Playing ball with him was his happiest moments, at some point he wanted to be a baseball player actually. He was so fond of it, even his room was baseball themed.
⚠️Angst part:
At school he had friends. Not the type where your excited to see them every day, nonono- the type that occasionally talked to you when they were bored, or if you did something cool. Yeah, those friends :( He clang onto that because that was the most he got. It’s not that the other kids hated him, they just had they’re groups….and he wasn’t apart of any. He was also the class laughing stock 😤 The teachers saw him occasionally talk to students so they never thought twice about the situation 🤦♀️ (Check on the poor baby!! 💥💥) He was really chatty when he did get the chance to talk and it was mostly him spewing “cool” lies about his life. Bragging, trying to big himself up to make others want to be his real friends. Buuut that never happened. Actually I wanna say he made one (actually 4 but we’ll get into that later) real friend in high school but he was a foreign exchange student—and he never got the chance to get his number before he went back.
Overall things got better into his teens for a while, until they didn’t. His earlier years played a factor but the teens really did it as to why he is how he is today. At first he had a friend group. It was like 3 dudes and him. They were genuine and had lots of fun together. They met on summer break and two weren’t from his school, the other was but in a different class from him. A pair in the group met in middle school and loved to skateboard. Just thought I’d mention it. Anyway they eventually split ways, not for any reason in particular—they just drifted apart :/
when he turned 11 is when his dad stopped playing with him and he changed his room from baseball themed. He was pretty upset about it but one of the reasons he stopped was because he was his dad had to focus on work more and picked up more hours. So he ended up wanting the weekends for resting and not playing. A year later when he was 12, his parent’s marriage got really rocky- like almost to a divorce—he never found out what happened but something did and completely fixed the problem?! Not overnight of course- but things looked up a lot. He stayed in his room a lot that year and he never bothered asking, only happy to know they were staying together.
Fluff again ♡:
uh random to lighten the mood.. he really loved his mother’s banana pudding. (If he could he would still eat it to this day). But he doesn’t visit her often enough. They email more than anything.
His favorite meal for breakfast was waffles. For lunch? Grilled cheese :) and for dinner he looooved takeout 😋 yeah he’s a pretty takeout obsessed dude and even though his mom can kick more butt in the kitchen than the restaurant cook can he just always had a taste for it 🤷♀️ His favorite takeout was Chinese food. Although he could never use the chopsticks he always tried :P
This isn’t my usual headcanons writing style but I decided I wanted to do it like this instead because the paragraphs are a bit long 😅
I do hope you don’t mind dear 💗 enjoy your tea 😊☕️
#anime#anime and manga#luffyvace#anime headcanons#fluff headcanons#fluff#mob psycho 100#mob psycho reigen#reigen arataka#reigen arakata#reigen manga#reigen x reader#mob psycho#arataka reigen#mp100 reigen#mp100#wholesome headcanons#wholesome#cute headcanons#fluffy prompts#fluff prompts#fluffy#fluffy headcanons#thank you for the submission!#answered#ask#slight angst#light angst#a bit of angst#tw angst
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Award for Best Parent Per Fantasy High Junior Year Episode (as decided by me a biased freak)
Please keep in mind that this is who I thought brought the most value to their kids (or the bad kids collectively) in each episode and not who the actual best parents are, I love all of the ones who scored in the positive pretty equally. Some parents did not get mentioned who deserved to be on this list but such is life.
This took all season to make so I hope you enjoy my efforts, it's long and it has a whole scoring system so all that's below the cut
Episode 1 - This one is pretty parent-less but I gotta give it to Balthazar who is probably a better parent to parrots than Duggan is to actual children. Also in later episodes it's stated he has actual children
Episode 2 - Tie for Sandra Lynn and Jawbone for making the girls a lovely little birthday cake! Honorable mention to Sklonda for doing her absolute best in the face of some serious injustice.
Episode 3 - Lydia Barkrock for making lunches for the Bad Kids. Dishonorable mention to Mac and Donna for making things hard for Bucky and Kristen
Episode 4 - Gorthalax for being there for his daughter and his team
Episode 5 - There's not anyone close to being a parent here but dishonorable mention to the mall cop who was the most unhelpful
Episode 6 - Lydia Barkrock wins once again for loving her son and the bad kids and for making just the best Chicken Parms. Honorable mention to Jawbone for being there for Kristen and making sure everyone's parents knew they were alive
Episode 7 - Giving this one Sandra Lynn and Jawbone for supporting Fig as she finds an academic pathway that works for her, Honorable mention for Gorbag and Roz for supporting their son in his artificing endeavors and making an effort to be in his life (And Wilma and Digby's lives but that's a matter for the next episode lol)
Episode 8 - Lydia for helping the Bad Kids with the mystery even though it's probably hard to dig through her past like that. Dishonorable mention for Gorthalax by crossing a boundary with Gorgug by using Fig to spy on him
Episode 9 - Sklonda for making time for her son who is so busy and so tired. Of course they can talk about the case! Everything is going to be okay :3
Episode 10 - Sklonda for checking in on Riz and defending him even when she was a little bit wrong about who she should be defending him from. Dishonorable mention to Hallariel who has never had a conversation with Fig before and won't stay on the line to talk to Fabian
Episode 11 - Sandra Lynn for listening to Fig and being there for her as her curse and identity crisis comes to a head, even if it's hard for her to watch her daughter struggle. Honorable mention to Sklonda for bonding with Riz and Fig at Loam Farm (technically she's still dating Gorthalax so it's probably nice for her to get to bond with Fig)
Episode 12 - There was only one parent in this episode but even if there were more Gilear would win for his tearful "Daughter!!!"
Episode 13 - Lot of good dads in this episode but I have to give it to Gilear for his touching speech to Fig (and Fabian). Honorable mention to Bill Seacaster who loves his darling boy
Episode 14 - I have to give it to Jawbone for continuing to show Adaine that she doesn't have to go through life alone. Dishonorable mention to Mac and Donna who can go to hell
Episode 15 - "There were no parents in this one" false this one goes out to Fig's future father-in-law Arthur Aguefort for believing in them specifically and saying fuck you to authority. Honorable mention to Gavin Pundle who may or may not be a parent but is at the very least a decent adult which can sometimes be hard to come by in Elmville
Episode 16 - Another Sandra Lynn win for being there for Adaine as much as she could be.
Episode 17 - Sandra Lynn for helping out with the quest and stepping in as the adult when things got too heavy. Honorable mention to Wilma and Digby for working on the van with their son (they missed him!!!) (If this happened in episode 16 I'm sorry. They are the same episode, to me)
Episode 18 - Jawbone for steering the boat and the vote in the right direction. Dishonorable menrion for Grandma Dragon
Episode 19 - Jawbone for protecting his kids (including Ragh) and their home even though he absolutely would have stayed and fought his interim boss if they'd asked him to
Episode 20 - It was a close race between winner and honorable mention but this episode we will give it to Bill Seacaster for choosing his son (maximum legend or not) over all of his wealth and glory. Honorable mention for Sandra Lynn who was there for Fig in the way she needed to be, while also learning from Fig, helping them both move forward.
Point check! 1 point per win, .5 points for honorable mention and -.5 points for dishonorable mention
In the negatives we have
Mac and Donna with -1
Mall cop with -.5
Grandma Dragon with -.5
Hallariel with -.5
In the positives we have
Gavin Pundle with .5
Gorthalax with .5
Roz and Gorbag with .5
Wilma and Digby with .5
Balthazar with 1
Arthur Aguefort with 1
Bill Seacaster with 1.5
Gilear with 2
Lydia with 3
Sklonda with 3
Jawbone with 5.5
And Sandra Lynn with 5.5
Thank god Sandra Lynn and Jawbone both won bc they have the most children lol. I almost miscounted and thought Sandra Lynn won but turns out they're perfectly matched
#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#statistically speaking fig just has a higher chance of one of her parents winning. up to her whether or not she claims her step parents
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Long post:
An undertale Au that I'll never work on because I don't have time. But because its been living in my head for a while I'm just gonna lay some things out in hopes it leaves my mind.
For clarification I don't ship Frans (I don't really ship anything) but I made this and wanted to be part of the story for some reason. (Its also a better version of a terrible Frans au I made a while ago)
Well technically its more of a UTDR Au becuase plot: Frisk is the seventh soul (eighth if you count Chara) Frisk makes it through the ruins and ends up killing Toriel. Frisk tries to make it through snowdin and waterfall, dies a bunch of times, gives up, resets and stays in the ruins. (Yes Toriel is still dead)
Frisk stays in the ruins, then many years later another human falls (Kris? I'm not sure if I want it to be a UTDR AU honestly) and Frisk is like, "yeah I'll help you make your way through the underground"
Ignoreing that part though, from Frisks time in the ruins, they're the one who ends up talking to Sans threw the door. Frisk ends up confessing to Killing Toriel, and Sans is something like " bro why tf would you do that? She was my friend" and Frisk is like "She tried to kill me first" eventually Sans just kinda gives up on caring about it since there's nothing he can really do about it. They talk to each other through the door, up unit the last human falls.
Thats when they finally meet each other face to face. Sans wasn't the judge yet when Frisk first went through the underground. Sans, at this point, doesn't really consider Frisk a Friend or anything like that, just someone he can talk to when he needs to. He is annoyed an slightly concerned that since Frisk left the ruins they might end up hurting other people so he keeps an eye on both them and the human Child.
Frisk on the other hand is aware of Sans suspicions and purposefully makes him worried about what they might do (when in reality they have no actual desire to harm anyone else). The reason Frisk does this is because they like him and his reactions, but they're 100% aware that Sans doesn't like them, and probably won't like them. So they just annoy him for the fun of it.(Their logic doesn't make sense I know)
I know this may not sound like Frans, but it is. It involves one of my favorite ship dynamics: Annoying "psychopath" X Someone too apathetic/tired to care.
When Frisk first fell they were 12, by the time the next human fell they're around 22
Here's the Kris vs my idea for an original Fallen human (Their name is Chance or Nova idk)
Poorly drawn because it was done quickly. If I did Nova/Chance their soul would be Justice.
Frisk would still have control over the timelines and would be the one bringing the human back to life, and giving advice on how they should continue.
The reason Sans doesn't have a Jacket in the first picture is because he gives it to the kid.
The fallen child is around 11-13 I'm honestly not sure about the age.
Honestly I want to work on this AU, but there is so much to it, I doubt I ever will. And if you made it this far and read all if this then... thank you! And if you have any questions please ask, I kinda want to talk about this for a littlebit. But I know it was a lot so I highly doubt anything will come from this post.
#undertale au#undertale#undertale oc#frisk#sans au#sans x frisk#frisk x sans#frisk au#frans#frisk oc#undertale original character#frans au#undertale comic#frisk and sans#sans and frisk#I don't ship frans
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