#talk to me about books if u want ive read many

[obsob]

making and weaving and loving! like we have done for millennia!!

[youremyheaven]

this is gunna sound so weird... men make my skin crawl. Like im attracted to men but everytime i see a man, my rbf awakens and i become hyper aware of my surroundings 😭

it doesn't help that im attending an all girls college now... any advice on how to ease up pls around them? I find it hard to even want to talk to them 😭 ik all men aren't bad and i may always not be in danger (imagine that in all caps and red) but i just wanna be able behave and think like a normal person around them ( this is so much that i even can't stand strangers)

Loads of luv to you ❤

honestly i hope u meet better men!!! there are some disgusting nasty perverted pieces of shit out there who dont deserve to be around women and i completely get why u would feel repulsed by them.

i wonder if u have malefic influence, they usually struggle the most with the opposite gender

tips on how to ease up around men:

think in terms of energy. dont project anger or hatred because thats what you will see in return. i know this is very triggering and difficult for many people but you HAVE to believe in good to SEE good. despite absolutely everything that ive gone thru, i still believe that people are inherently good, kind and helpful and i see proof of it everyday.

ive had men treat me with dignity, respect and kindness in the shadiest of circumstances and ive had men be nasty to me out in the open, so it just comes down to character. just think of men as people honestly and not as hound dogs about to attack u.

2. imagine them as little boys

sometimes when men are soft or boyish with me, it reminds me of how they mustve been as kids and it warms me. i have two little boy cousins who are 12 and 6 respectively and they both adooooreeee me and want to marry me when they grow up🥺🥺🥺theyre the sweetest kids on the planet and i could never ever feel otherwise, theyre my babies. idk if this is something u can relate to but think of a little boy you're close to, how innocent and silly he is and how you could never see him as a threat or hate him and understand that grown men can be like that too.

3. how we treat people has a lot to do with how people treat us

if you have a rbf and generally act standoffish and cold/distant, then you're probably perceived as being bitchy 😬😬and nevermind men, even women probably find u intimidating or hard to approach. im only saying this because learning how to navigate social situations is 90% of adulthood and the key to personal and professional success.

learn to smile more. i know women hate being told to smile but honestly we should alllll smile more. force yourself to do it until it becomes a habit. be that person who smiles at strangers. dont u feel happy when someone smiles at you??? so in turn, be that person to others!!! <33

learn to get out of your head. most people think too much. i hate spending time with people who talk about everything from a victim pov. like yes sure u/we women, are in a position of disadvantage in many ways, historically speaking but ???? this attitude?? wont get u anywhere. (I'm speaking generally and not about you particularly)

i would say the key is to turn inward and work on yourself. read all those cliche self help books about "how to influence people" yada yada,, learn social etiquette and watch all those youtube gurus who teach soft skills. forget about men and hating them for a second and just focus on self improvement. as you change, youll see the world change with u.

just think of men as people basically. also idk if youre familiar with carl jung but i feel like you have a wounded animus. many women who grew up with an absent (emotionally or otherwise) father grow up to project all that onto men. and in turn have damaging relationships with men!!

im not a man defender and im in no way saying all men are good but i genuinely dont think its healthy to hate, thats all!!

idk if any of this is helpful sikeee but lmk if u have any updates

also lots of love to u too angel!!<3

[someobscurereference]

ive been rereading your ffxv fic "im trying hard to take it back" for literally four years now. please end my suffering and tell me how gladio feels. please. PLEASE. (but only if u want ofc)

(fic) Short answer: Gladio feels insane guilt and spends a lot of his life trying to make this up to Prompto. In the process, they deepen their connection as friends and do begin a relationship probably around the one-year mark of endless darkness. <3

Longer answer: (implications of abuse/violence tw but no worse than in the fic itself; just what others assume to be true even if it's not in the context of this specific fic)

Gladio is a secret romantic at heart who has always envisioned meeting his soulmate, but he's also duty-bound and duty comes first. So even though he reads romance books (amongst other types of books too) and indulges in his head a bit as many people do, he's often put his duty to the crown first and foremost in his mind. He also didn't imagine his soulmate was anyone on this trip and thought perhaps the person he may have been fated to meet died in the assault of Insomnia. Even if they were a refugee, they can't be a priority to him at this moment. His priority has to be Noctis.

Prompto has obviously grown on him over the course of their road trip, but there are aspects of them that don't 100% mesh (as is true with every realistic relationship). That said, Gladio never in a hundred years would want this moment of (understandable but out of line) frustration and anger in the wake of Luna and Altissa to be a permanent mark on Prompto's face. He's genuinely horrified and disgusted with himself for a long time after this and spends most of his life trying to make it up. He feels like a dirtbag about it.

That said, Prompto runs away from him in this moment and they need time to calm down, just as the fic shows. Noctis goes after Prompto, just like in canon. Prompto falls off the train and has his Despair Arc just like in the DLC, now with the added despair of "well, in addition to being a clone, my soulmate hates me. And in addition to the mark of inhumanity on my wrist (barcode), I have a giant hand print of him literally Shoving Me Away on my face. Forever."

Aranea: Well, do you want to die about it. Or do you want to live.

Prompto, eventually like in canon: Live, I guess. But it will be excruciating.

Aranea: That's what living is. We do it anyway. Your friends love you. Get off the floor.

He fights his way through his issues and gets rescued like in canon. Gladio probably tries to talk to him when they all catch up again, trying to apologize, and Prompto tells him to hold off on that for later.

Then, of course, Noctis is eaten by the crystal and "later" becomes much, much later as they evacuate and try to survive in eternal darkness. (Though they also can't Not think about it because it's a giant hand print. On Prompto's face. And every person they meet has Something To Say about it, for better or worse, whether they knew Prompto before or not. Prompto cannot escape it, and when Gladio is not doing Crown Duties he feels he must do in Noct's absence, he's with Prompto, so he also Cannot Escape It either. Even when the person speaking is unaware that Gladio left that mark. It's almost worse when they don't know, but when they see it's Gladio, who is such a big guy who seemingly hit Prompto and left that permanent mark there, some of them get nasty to him and some back off out of fear. Both are horrible. The guilt is eating him alive.)

Eventually, enough time passes as the dust settles that they do Talk About It. Gladio apologizes sincerely, for the 500th time. Prompto's like, "Well. It's not like you could have known that this would be The One Time it happened." And then cracks a joke about their soulmate mark being a Prompto's hand print on Gladio's ass from a butt slap in another life, which does help the tension somewhat. (The more Gladio tries to apologize, the more Prompto grows sick of hearing it, so they just have to move on and keep going, as he's learned to do.)

They grow closer over time, especially because there's not a lot of people who have survived to this point and even less later on. They do get together romantically, both because they do like the idea of soulmates (for different reasons) and also because they're living out of each others pockets for years, so there's an affection and dependency that develops there. Also, teenage Prompto always thought Gladio was really handsome and teen Gladio thought Prompto was cute and sincere for a pipsqueak.

When they are out together on dates in normal settings surrounded by strangers after the light returns, Gladio will receive dirty looks for the rest of his life from strangers who see the hand print on Prompto's face and immediately (correctly) assumes it was out of anger rather than a funny accident or something. (Edit: Some people will assume there is a funny story attached. Gladio will not know what to say to this. Prompto will play along.) He will learn to live with this. Prompto is really grateful Gladio is with him despite everything.

[capcavan]

kinda inspired by that response u did to someone else's post. but like. it just reminded me of how different Americans see nationality/ethnicity/race to other people, and how it can come through in the things they write.. like especially fanfiction. like how everyone who isn't a white American (and sometimes even those that are) can just become stereotypes. nicky is repeatedly a victim of this, ive read so many fics that just 'exaggerate' the fact that he's Mexican, even though it makes no sense! nicky has lived in America and Germany his whole life, his dad's a racist and his mum barely speaks to him, he'd be almost completely disconnected from Mexican culture realistically, and u can kinda see that in the books. but in fics, they make him like only eat stereotypical Mexican food, speak Spanish, listen to music in Spanish... like it's nuts. they do it to riko too except he becomes the Japanese mafia racial stereotype instead. Jean suddenly being obsessed with all things French, ranting about baguettes, even though canonically he has no good memories of France and seemingly wants nothing to do with the country or culture. it drives me crazy. like. even with neil 😭 he's canonically white and American, lived in America his whole life, but suddenly a British mother means he has a strong British accent and complains about how people make tea.

am I crazy?? its like almost comical levels of stereotyping, you'd think they'd be doing it for a bit, and that post just kinda reminded me of it.

the neil vs Jean British vs French thing is crazy too. I've never heard a British and French person argue over their countries under the age of like 60. but in so many fics, usually raven neil fics, its all they wanna talk about. wtf!!

everybody who could be classed as even slightly not "100% American" suddenly becomes a stereotype. and yknow the thing that rlly gets me? the accents are always exaggerated and always mentioned. nicky has a strong Mexican accent, neil has a strong British accent, and so on... but the "100% American" characters can be from varying parts of America with widely different accents (and cultures), but you'd never know it because the writer never mentions them even having an accent. it's just so blatant and shameless, and they don't even seem to realise they're doing it. they'll have other Americans in the comments being like "I love your British neil 🥰🥺" that is not neil. that is a stereotype.

even the books themselves to a lesser extent do this... like I'm pretty sure Jean having a French accent is mentioned. which isn't bad in and of itself, but a lot of the foxes are from different parts of America but again no accent differences ever mentioned. :/

all of this in every fucking fandom just for the record the og post we talked about was written by non American but it's just .. fandom think that is repeated by people as stupid fucking joke like yes it is very normal for immigrants to move to different country and still care and cultivate their traditions but then you look at how fandom represent it and like ... the rest of the world sees you and thinks you are fucking weird for handling it this way ✌️✌️✌️

[ad0rechuu]

★ MILKY WAY. ━━ (000) ASK THEM ANYTHING part 1

💌 ZERO SAYS. i can’t believe that we passed the 30 chapter mark!! thank you to everyone to participated (& for +500 notes), i’ve always wanted to this and it was a lot of fun! i didn’t get as many questions as i wanted but i’m still grateful regardless <3 you can find part 2 here!

❪ # i ❫ : Do you think water is wet? ━━ to smg & jwy

from @seonghwaddict

MINGI : No it’s not… I don’t think it is— maybe it is… huh? I don’t know, I’m impartial

WOOYOUNG : I can make it wet *winks*

❪ # ii ❫ : miss u stinkaboo love youuuu this is taegyu papa trusttttit how u doing love? ━━ to yn

from @tocupid

YN : Alright who payed you huh??? (in case this is real, I’m great now I’m talking to you haha! i miss you too <3)

fatou’s note : Embarrassingly down bad

❪ # iii ❫ : how would you guys react if you are in date with dearest yn but there is someone following you guys, u thought it would be dispatch but it's the other simps? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

SEONGHWA : Call Hongjoong and snitch, I know they would end up getting involved in MY date someway somehow!

SAN : A date?! With Yn?! I would be too focused on Yn to notice if i’m being honest

MINGI : Pause the date and beat some ass. I would also be super disappointed in hyung, I expect that from San but from him? I would cry (and also call Hongjoong hyung)

❪ # iv ❫ : who do you ship with YN? A. Taegyu. B. San. C. Seonghwa D. Mingi (will you betray his moral loyalty?) ━━ to jyh

from anon

YUNHO : E. I’ll move to a different country and start a new life under a new identity so that none of them kill me for whatever my choice might be (not taegyu that’s for sure, he seems cool but i ship- )

❪ # v ❫ : when is yours and yn's wedding?? also who do u think u can take out in a fight between the boys that also wants your girl's heart? ━━ to syn

from anon

YUNA : I’m so glad you asked! I’m currently planning it but she doesn’t know about it yet. Also I could easily take all of them and I would but Seulgi would take away my Yn privileges anyway about Yn and me! she’s so cute, did you kno-

authors note : Interview cut off because participant had their yn privileges taken away

❪ # vi ❫ : when u and yn finally have ur moment will u be the perfect gentleman or will u let ur dreams take over and just smooch the heck out of yn? ━━ to smg

from anon

MINGI : Me? Meeting Yn? Smooching her?…

authors note : Interview cut short because participant would not stop giggling

❪ # vii ❫ : How does it feel to be the biggest simps on planet earth?? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from @meginthebuilding27

SEONGHWA : I’m not a simp, its just that i would do anything for her and i think about her all day and i lov- oh…

SAN : Great! really, really fucking great but also my heart feels like its about to burst anytime i see anything related to her… do you think I should see a doctor??

MINGI : I don’t like the fact that I have to share spot! I wanna be number one!

❪ # viii ❫ : How do you keep them in place and don't make them do anything stupid? ━━ to khj

from @meginthebuilding27

HONGJOONG : Have you seen them do anything? I don’t because somehow they are harder to handle than children! But I guess parenting books help, except for Seonghwa, he’s too powerful. oh! And Yn too, I’m glad I have Seulgi to fall back on, she too much to say no to (read: too cute to say no to)

❪ # ix ❫ : we know u love yn and treat her like a baby sister so this q is perfect for you! out of all the boys which one would you choose for n based off what you know of them (then looks teehee) ━━ to ksg

from anon

SEULGI : Aww you’re right, she is my baby! But I just want whoever can makes her the happiest. Regarding the second question you are aware that you are asking a lesbian this right? I don’t think I can answer…

swan’s note : Seonghwa. She likes Park Seonghwa the most, I don’t know why she’s being difficult but it’s mostly because he’s very pretty

❪ # x ❫ : I know u love and care for yn but why don't you help your mans (the 3 lovers) out? (as far as asking if she wants to hang out over her break :3) I know you want to stay unbiased but I gotta know! ━━ to khj

from anon

HONGJOONG : That’s a good question, I honestly did not think of that. Maybe I should do that in the near future?

❪ # xi ❫ : what made u stan yn and whats ur fave piece of star merch that you own ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

SEONGHWA : I love kpop girlgroups, so when I found a new group was debuting I checked out their music and when I watched the Ponzona mv for the choreo it was love on first sight & The album that I bought immediately after and got me my very first photo card of Yn! (It’s still behind my phone)

SAN : I saw a video of her on twitter which was so cute that I just had to know who it was & my Yn chibi plushy, it’s unofficial fan made merch but it’s adorable

MINGI : It was an accident honestly! I was going to check out my friends performance so I joined the line outside the building, nobody questioned me being there so I didn’t know I was at wrong place until I realized that I was standing in line for a fan sign, I thought just leaving would be rude so I stayed and my breath was taken away when I met Yn! & A t-shirt with their logo, it’s fashionable and comfortable as fuck!

❪ # xii ❫ : from 1 to 10, with 10 being the most, how would you rate how much you enjoy the chaos that is currently happening as of ch. 30 ━━ to kys

from anon

YEOSANG : 9, it would be a 10 but they genuinely seemed hurt. I still do enjoy some good chaos though

❪ # xiii ❫ : i badly need some tips on fighting people it can be on the internet or idk face to face but im scared cause i might lose, i just want to fight some constantly annoying people, teach me your ways teacher! ━━ to psh, csn, smg & cjh

from anon

SEONGHWA : Try to not get mad, stay as logical and calm as possible that just makes your opponents seem crazier

SAN : Find something or someone you would argue for no matter what the outcome might be, it’s all about passion

MINGI : Hit ‘em where it hurts!

JONGHO : It’s not a skill that can be taught, you just need to be a true hater.

yuna’s note : Just say Kang YeoSang-

seulgi’s note : Please ignore Yuna’s note!!

❪ # xiv ❫ : from 1 to 10 how jobless did u think hongjoong was when yn first reached out to him ━━ to ksg

from anon

SEULGI : Hongjoong is great and so, so talented! He’s also a college drop out with way too much time on his hands, so it can’t be less that 7 right?

❪ # xv ❫ : are you guys legitimately in love with yn or is it just a fanboy kind of love? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

authors note : Participants are not allowed to answer this question (yet)

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[metanarrates]

u are making me want to reread so i can talk about it with you. book club! anyway i havent read them since i was like. 17 maybe?? but i would love to hear more of your thoughts. unfortunately i dont have any specific questions due to not remembering that much. wait thoughts on the ending of the games scene. lets kill ourselves together scene

yes you should! my dms are open for you. I love to chat about what im reading 😄😄😄

i already talked in another ask about how the spectre of survivor's guilt made that scene work for me on an emotional level even though I don't buy the romance, but let's talk about how the other stakes of this scene unfortunately make no goddamn sense. (this is a trend in my problems with the hunger games. the stakes are weirdly defined and inconsistent on both logical and symbolic levels.)

the capitol audience does not behave as reality tv audiences irl do. ive talked before about this, and I'll say it again - no reality tv audience would ever willingly want to watch the days long peeta/katniss cave segment livestream. if we are meant to believe that this is an audience who thrives on bloodshed and drama, we need to see that constantly putting pressure on the characters. it does not work well as a story about being forced into behaving as entertainment if the characters only occasionally feel the pressure to be entertaining. the entire structure of the story needs to be different if we are to believe that this is a livestream that a lot of people (many of whom are Sickos) are watching.

with that in mind, let's lay down the things that the story needs you to believe in order for this scene to work:

the reality TV audience is fine, or fine enough, with the gamemakers changing the rules of the games back last-minute to prevent two victors from winning. they at least do not storm the gamemakers studio about it.

a victor needs to exist, so much so that the absence of one could get the gamemakers killed

the audience would NOT like to see a lover's double suicide at the climax of the games

rejecting the need for a victor and dying by suicide instead translates into a meaningful and political rebellion against the capitol

the audience agrees, or agrees enough, that it's fine to change the rules back to allow two victors.

none of these feel earned to me. any TV watcher worth their salt will tell you that it's universally hated when a show changes its rules arbitrarily for the sake of dramatic tension. this would work if the point of this was that the capitol was willing to sacrifice viewer satisfaction to retain control over the games, but...

that argument is reliant on the assumption that the capitol needs a victor. and why does it? the purpose of these games is to be violent entertainment and propaganda to show the futility of resistance. katniss even says in an earlier chapter that there have been games with no victor because everybody died. there's been very little establishment of why the capitol might find a victor necessary. i can speculate, but ultimately the novel doesn't really establish the victors as serving a critical purpose to the system of the games. they don't even say explicitly that a victor is necessary until this veey scene. the cruelty is the point of the games. and being forced to kill yourself is cruel. so...

I have no idea why an audience would hate a double suicide here. if they're consuming the games as violent entertainment, they should LOVE that shit! its dramatic! its great tv! ratings should be through the roof! what an amazing tragedy! this is the height of the capitol forcing people to participate in cruelty! therefore...

I straight up do not understand the notion that this constitutes meaningful rebellion in any way. sure, its a refusal to allow the expected outcome of a single victor to occur, but I did outline how I don't think the capitol has any logical reason to object to the double suicide. even if you parse it as resistance, why does it matter if they're both dead? this should instead show everyone that resisting only leads to death. which is the point of the games.

and is the audience cruel or not? are they okay with a "kill or be killed" scenario or are they rooting for peeta & katniss so badly that they would cheer for a deus ex machina to save them? i just don't get it. it doesn't make sense to me.

so yeah the scene just feels silly and contrived at the end of this

[elly99]

us without me IV: new jeans

A story series from the perspective of Mia (fem!Reader/OC) as she goes through her memories and recounts falling in love with her best friend in high school, Minji. She suffers in silence until she breaks and it all comes crashing down.

Part 4 of 7. Check here for more details. Reading previous parts for context is encouraged. CW for language.

“Mia-ya,” she calls from behind her locker door.

“Mmm?”

“You wanna do something this weekend?”

“I dunno. Just relax, I guess.”

“You don’t wanna do something together?” She closes her locker, revealing her face pouting at you.

There were so many things you wanted to do together. But you bury those ideas under the books you stuff into your own locker.

“Did you have something in mind?”

“Nothing in particular. Just something with you.”

Fucking hell.

“Well, I think I need new jeans. Help me pick out some?”

You catch her smiling to herself.

“What?”

“Nothing.” She giggles. “I’ll tell you later.”

“Why are you laughing?”

“I’ll tell you later!”

“김민지 이상하다.”

Before closing your locker you notice a tiny bear sticker on the door.

“How did this get here? We’re only a month in and you’ve already started vandalizing my locker?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, bro.”

“Is this why you were laughing at me?”

“No, no! But I will admit it’s funny how you only noticed it now. And also how easy it was to guess your code.”

“Wait, yeah! How the fuck did you know?”

“Mia! No need to be so angry that your best friend knows you so well.”

It slowly dawns on you. “You remembered the date?”

“Of course! The day we got these,” she says, lifting her ring finger up to your face. “It was my idea after all.”

You look down at your own fingers. And you start to feel your sanity slowly slipping through them.

“To be fair, it did take me a couple of tries before I got it. But still… I know you’re sentimental like that, so it wasn’t hard.”

As she proudly struts away to the cafeteria you spot her applying lip balm - the same one you used.

You thought you’d buried it in your locker along with everything else but you find yourself powerless to stop the idea of kissing her making its way back into your mind as the lip balm touches her lips.

-

The smell of spring wafted in through the open bedroom window. You had your phone to text her in one hand and the chocolate bar she got you on the walk home in the other.

so we’re just going shopping tomorrow?

yeah unless u had something else u wanted to do

wanna watch a movie?

huh? i thought u didnt like movies

yeah but i just want to spend time with you and i know you like going to the cinema so

You admire the blue ring on your finger and laugh.

My girlfriend really likes me, doesn’t she?

As long as you had it on you could pretend. So you never took it off.

i just checked and there arent any movies showing rn that im interested in

wanna come sleep over at my place then? we can watch the movies we want

wow u really wanna spend time with me huh

you got a problem with that bro?

no its just ur being sweeter than usual idk

well i do have something really important to tell you and i just wanna spend the day together so we can talk about it

No, Mia. It can’t be what you think it is.

is this what u were being so secretive about earlier?

yeah

why so serious bro is everything ok?

yeah everything’s perfect! i just want to tell you in person

No. Fucking. Way.

why not now?

i’ll tell you tomorrow dw

you promise?

of course! i’ll pick you up at 10? or is that too early?

no im fine with it but i doubt youll wake up that early

you’re right 😖 i’ll just text you tomorrow

sure

okie good night mimi ily 💗

good night <3

Mia, there’s just no way. Calm down. You’re being silly. You’re being delusional. Stop it.

You start laughing again at the absurdity of the situation. At the fact you were even entertaining the thought. You laugh until tears start pooling in your eyes. Until you forget why you were laughing in the first place. Until the tears fall and you find yourself crying into the night.

-

i’m up

congrats on waking up before noon ig

hey i set an alarm just for you so you better be grateful

woah im so touched

we have a date today so i better be on time right? 😊

Damn it, Minji.

does that mean youll be here soon?

yeah in 30

cool

It was 11:10. You’d gotten ready to go two hours ago. But she didn’t need to know that. She didn’t need to know that you were dying to know what it was she wanted to tell you.

hey i miss you

What the fuck?

bro whats up ur never this clingy

sorry i’m just really happy

about what?

you’ll see

It was 11:11. You wish for what you’d always wished for. You knew there was no point but with her being like this and your ring still on your finger, the line between fantasy and reality had never been more blurred.

-

Waiting outside your front door, you see her approaching from down the street. Even at that distance you could see the radiant smile she was giving you.

Often you wondered what life would have been like had you not moved in just down the street from her. Had you not gone to the same school. What if the universe didn’t give you so many opportunities to get close to each other? Why did it have to give you so many reasons to fall for her? But you had no choice. This was your life now. The girl you called your best friend, the one standing in front of you, was the person you so desperately loved.

“굿모닝.”

“It’s not morning anymore. You’re late.”

“미안!” You’re reminded that every apology would sound like your name. “But I’m here now. Let’s go.”

“Don’t you have something to tell me first?”

“Later. Over dinner.” Her smile was cheeky. Teasing.

“We have dinner plans?”

“Yup. My treat.”

Your heart trips over its own beats.

“Bro, it should be my turn.”

“Mia, no. This one’s important to me.”

Then it starts to scream as it hits the ground.

“My god, Min, what’s this about?”

“Don’t worry about it! Let’s just go get your new jeans first.”

She starts laughing again and you still don’t know why.

-

“Minji! No way!” you exclaim, shopping bags filled with clothes in one hand, her hand in the other as she tugs you along to a familiar part of the mall.

She just smiles and sticks her tongue out.

“This place is expensive!”

“But it’s your favorite. So it’s where we’re going.”

“Minjiii,” you whine.

“Hey, if you really cared about me spending too much you wouldn’t have such expensive taste. You left me no choice, to be honest.”

“Bro!”

For the first time in a while you’re laughing together. For a reason you both knew.

“For real, though, Mia. It’s fine! It’s my treat, so don’t worry about it.”

“You’re so sweet, Min.”

As if that needed further confirmation, she pulls out a chair for you.

“Mia! Are you blushing?”

“What? No!” You quickly cover your face with your hands. Your ring smiles a devilish smile as you bring it close.

“Don’t fall in love, bro,” she says teasingly. But it was way too late for that.

“What do you mean? I’m just excited for the food.”

“Sure.”

With that one word her expression changes. You couldn’t quite parse it. But you convinced yourself that there was something about her face that told you that she knew. And there was nothing more terrifying.

-

As your meal comes to a close and the night slows down she finally says it.

“Mia.”

“Minji.”

“I have something to tell you.”

“I know.” Your voice falters as your heartbeats quicken. You clear your throat to hide it. “Just tell me already.”

She leans over the table, looking straight into your eyes with something like anxiousness in hers.

“I’m… I’m debuting in July.”

In that moment, as your pounding chest comes to a crashing halt, there was no greater dissonance than wanting to be happy for your best friend but being disappointed that she didn’t want to be more than that. Being excited for her future but being bitter that her future wasn’t you.

Then came rage. Fury. The dissonance between expecting, wanting, praying for her to confess and knowing that that was just a puerile, selfish fantasy you conjured for yourself. “You’re being silly again,” is what she would have said. You were so angry and there was no one else to blame but you.

“Bro, I’m so happy for you!” you strain. “All that hard work’s finally paying off!”

“Thanks, Mia,” she says softly.

“I don’t even know why you were worried you wouldn’t debut! You’re so talented. It was always gonna happen. I’m so proud of you, Min!”

“Thank you,” she repeats with her eyes.

“So, what’s the name of your group?”

She laughs once more and you finally understand why.

“NewJeans.”

“Oh my god, no wonder.”

“But don’t tell anyone, ok?”

“Of course, bro. Why would you even think I’d tell anyone?” you ask a little more aggressively than you’d like, still barely controlling your anger. Thankfully, she doesn’t notice.

“Just making sure.”

“How many songs do you have?”

“Four. And, yeah, we’ll be filming our music videos in Spain.”

“Oh, wow!” You wonder how much longer you could hide it. How much longer until she realizes you were faking it. “When are you leaving?”

“Next week. Which is why I wanted to spend time with you this weekend.”

“Wait, will you be gone for your birthday, then?”

“Yeah…”

“Oh.” You struggle to find words to say as your anger is replaced by sadness. “I’ll miss you…”

“I’m sorry! I’ll miss you, too! I promise we’ll spend lots of time together when I get back.”

“But I’m sure you’ll be really busy even then. Even more when you debut…”

“Let’s not worry about it yet, Mia! I’m still here. And I’m just happy to be with you now.”

“Me, too.” You smile weakly.

“I’ll just go pay, ok? I’ll be right back, then we can talk more about it at home. We have all night anyway!”

“Thanks, Min. For the food. For today. For everything.”

“Aww, bro, you sound so sad!” she says as she stands up. You look up at her from your chair. Seeing your hand on the table, she gently wraps hers around it and you hear the subtle clink of your rings as they touch. “I’m still here, ok? I always will be.”

You don’t take your eyes off her as she walks away. And they remain glued to her in forbidden admiration as she returns. Every time you looked at her there was always a part of you that wanted to just rush over to her and tell her everything. That she was your everything. Your first love. Now, knowing the world would soon fall in love with her, too - because you knew everyone would - that part of you wanted to keep her all to yourself.

Then there was the part of you just happy to see her. To have her in your life. Because she did make you happy. She always tried her best to put a smile on your face. She was an angel like that and today was further proof of it. And her smile - the same one you could see on her face now as she approached you - it made you feel safe. Like things were going to be alright. There was a strange, counterintuitive comfort you found in it, knowing that, even if she didn’t know your pain, she’d be there for you. She thought the world of you. She loved you like no one else could. Just not in that way. And you were happy with that. You’d have to be.

“가자.”

At the sound of her soft voice your sadness gives way to resignation. You remind yourself that it wasn’t her fault she couldn’t give you what your heart yearned for. And in doing so, you could finally, truly be happy for her.

With your hand hidden from her in your pocket, you slip your ring off with your thumb as she takes you home.

[omophagic-beast]

for the tarot rpg ask game! The Fool, The Empress, The Hierophant, The Chariot, The Hanged Man, The Devil, The Tower, The Star, The Sun!

!!! wowow hi!! thank you for all the questions, im gonna put them under a read more as to not clog up peoples dashes

from this ask game

The Fool – What do the earliest stages of work on a game look like for you? OR How did you get into game design?

i have a notes discord server! and a channel in there specifically for game ideas. previously i had a big word document titled "game ideas", but its easier to access discord from my phone lol

usually i have an idea and i stick it in there first

heres the start of the pillars of creation :3

and then ill noodle around with it, just brainstorm and slap spaghetti around. this is another reason why i like discord for this at the moment, its informal and easy, much less daunting than a word doc

i didnt end up using most of the bits here lol

and then ill move it into a word doc once its clear that ive got an actual project / game starting to form!

the one problem with this is sometimes ill keep an idea in there for much longer than i should and it becomes a mess of me replying to myself, terrible to follow. this is the current problem with moonlight whaling, sigh

The Empress — Where do your ideas come from? OR Do you seek out or avoid inspiration while working on an idea?

a lot of places!! tumblr being one of them, sometimes ill see a post where im like "huh that could be a game in some way" and ill stick it in my notes discord for later. but really anything, books, movies, songs, other games. im not the first to say this but u gotta read / watch / experience new things to make new things

The Hierophant — Who is a fellow game designer you’ve learned a lot from? OR What is a piece of popular wisdom about games you think is nonsense?

i answered the second one here so ill answer the first!

ive learned a lot from any designer whos game ive played or read, to start. but i wanna shout out @thydungeongal on here, her posts abt game design and rollmaster / d&d are highly highly fascinating and helpful to me, as a guy who hasnt even played d&d let alone any old school stuff and just kinda jumped into the indie scene from the start.

kinda makes me wanna play rollmaster, ngl. whats it doin with all those mechanics and tables =w=

The Chariot — What is the next project you’re planning to start OR What is the next project you’re excited to finish?

this has been my big question to myself recently, what game to really focus in on next. i have games that just need to be finished, but i think my next one* is gonna be this time travel game ive been thinking of

working title is Hooked, and the reason i think im going to start (and finish) it next is cause ive already got the main mechanic figured out, where when you fail a roll you can choose to create a hook, and in doing so succeed the roll

but that hook is a place where a future you has traveled back to that point in time and given you what you needed to succeed, which means at some point youre going to have to come back and close the loop, or else risk creating a paradox

too many paradoxes and the universe explodes so like. be careful :3!

it is going to be a lot of work, i want the general aesthetic to be the journal of a time traveler, with notes from all their future and past selves scrawled in the margins in different colors. and theres the question of if its a solo game or multiplayer, or both. solo-friendly is my current thought, but encouraged for more than one person. but we'll see how it actually plays.

The Hanged Man — What other creative pursuits do you have? OR What current trends in game design are you most interested in?

someone should ask me this again cause i wanna answer the other one also :3c

but! i have a crochet project on the mind so i wanna talk abt other stuff im into also :3

im currently considering ADHD and how it could possibly relate to myself, so just keep that in mind when i say ive dipped my paws into a whoooole lot of different creative hobbies. sewing, knitting, pottery, bookbinding, needle felting, jewelry making, and yea, crochet, are all stuff ive been into at one point or another

but my favorites are crochet and cooking / baking. for most of my life i thought my career was gonna be in food service! ive been a baker, cake decorator, and diner cook before, and loved all three of those jobs.

and crochet is great mainly cause you can make stuffed animals / amigurimis >:33 i loooove little guys and being able to choose what soft yarn im gonna make em out of, though its been a minute since ive made one. but!! like i mentioned ive got a project on the mind, as im gonna try and make the "something strange and indescribable" from the Before the Flood backerkit campaign and im very excited abt it :3 stay tuned for posts abt my success or failure on this front

The Devil — What motifs or mechanics do you just keep coming back to? OR What is a game you’ve enjoyed playing in the last year?

NIGHTHAWKS by @titanrpg is really really good. it has a heart in it, one that beats at an all too-familiar rhythm. when i played it we told a story that was perhaps a touch too close to home as well, disparate sad people sitting several stools apart at a dive bar in a small town.

i have a tendency towards comedy when i play ttrpgs, but my favorite moments are all when ive been deeply serious and sad, and thats what i got from NIGHTHAWKS

The Tower — Talk about about a game you tried to make that crashed and burned.

center of the known universe was an anthology of games i wanted to make a while back, all inspired by the part of the nevadan desert i live in. i dont think its crashed and burned necessarily but i certainly never finished it and im not sure i ever will, though i still like the ideas for some of the games and may release them individually

The Star — Talk about a game you’re working on and what excites you about it.

a game ive been working on for a looong time that i dont think ive really talked abt on here is The Lady, The Tiger, and The Accused. its a descended from the queen game based on The Lady or The Tiger? short story, where (to put it very briefly) a king has created a new form of justice where the accused is put in an arena with two identical doors in front of them.

behind one door, a lady of an appropriate social standing for them to marry, behind the other a very hungry tiger. this leaves the verdict up to fate, for if the accused is innocent they will surely pick the door with the lady, and if they are guilty they will choose the door with the tiger.

but the accused in the story is also the lover of the lands princess, and when they look back at her for the last time she raises a hand and points towards one of the doors.

the question in the story is one of love. would the princess rather see her lover dead, or married to someone else?

what comes through the door, the lady or the tiger?

but! there are other characters in this story, with agency and lives of their own.

The Lady, The Tiger, and The Accused instead asks a question of trust. when The Accused looks back towards their princess, and she raises her hand, do they trust her? do they open the door that she points towards?

its a game for three players, with each person playing one of the titular characters. it uses the descended from the queen format to create the character of the princess throughout play, along with the characters of The Lady, The Tiger, and The Accused.

its a good game!! ive got a bit more work to do on it, mainly on the tiger role. not everyone is comfortable being an actual tiger and role playing scenes that involve communicating with humans or attending parties and such, it turns out.

but im really excited abt it overall :3 its good and fun and i think it uses the descended from the queen format really well and hopefully one day ill do a crowdfunding project for it and get enough money to hire a bunch of different artists to make princess illustrations for it >:333

The Sun — Talk about a game you’ve made that you’re proud of.

im proud of all of my games, in one way or another. but, with an obligatory Before the Flood mention (crowdfunding now!), im really and truly proud of my body is your body is our body is

it was my first kinda big game that i published, and there was a lot of stuff with the first edition i really wasnt super happy with. im really, really proud of myself for finally going back in this year and fixing it. its so much better now! in a lot of ways.

and i mean it was good to start with also, most of my problems were with the programming side of it. when i was making the second edition reading back through the game made me cry a bit lol. theres a lot of banger lines in there and a lot of feelings.

[redr0sewrites]

i wanted to kinda talk about my opinion on some things related to Ana Huang and the romance genre in general- sorry for the rant!!!

finished king of sloth by ana huang and urgrhrgrhrhrh i actually really really enjoyed it!!!! (i say that ab everything i read tho tbh, i've just never been the type who criticizes the media i consume so PLEASE don't ever base ur opinions off of mine :)

my post isn't about the book specifically or even the author. i lowkey have a bone to pick and its NOT with ana huang or the book but moreso the reaction i've been noticing about the book (specifically from people who have been making fun of it and/or people who read it)! this isn't meant to start discourse or anything but i am open to polite discussion about some of the points im bringing up. this is generally focused around ana huang but also a lot of majority-feminine centric media has this same problem.

anyways, i'm gonna try to express how i feel as best i can without being rude or offensive ajshsjs-

it just lowkey irks me that sm people have been hating on ana huang now that she's getting attention, and since she's a romance writer, her fans and fanbase is mostly women and/or girls, (which is totally ok)!! however, i genuinely feel like this is just another barbie movie or sarah j mass or taylor swift scenario where the second something/someone that a lot of woman like starts to get publicity, people (mostly men) start excessively hating on it.

i have genuinely seen sm people dissing not only ana huang but her writing as well. now i don't know much about her as a person and i know that a lot of people are flawed so if she's genuinely done something wrong PLEASE lmk, i don't keep up w that stuff. and hey, maybe you just didn't like the book and thats ok too!!! its totally valid to not like something, but to make fun of an author and the people who enjoy her content just seems.. ehh.

a lot and i mean a LOT of people claim that she's only popular because of her smut but i actually enjoy her books more than just for the smutty/romance aspect. maybe that's just me, but i genuinely find it interesting and a lot of other people i know also enjoy it for the plot. and if u are reading for the smut that's ok as well, this is a totally safe space, and nobody should judge u on your reasons to read a book. the books are INTENDED to be fluffy and spicy and overall are just fictional romantic stories. they're smutty, funny books, not the bible. it shocks me how much people make fun of them.

i just keep seeing this trend of people negatively nitpicking anything and everything about authors and their writing ESPECIALLY when its romance and it just rubs me the wrong way. ive seen a LOT of people upset about huang including cameo's of her other characters in her latest book, and if you don't like those other characters so much then why... are u reading it??? THAT SOUNDS SO MEAN IM SORRY but its just so strange that people are upset about her including her own characters from her own series'?

its just disappointing that whenever someone or something becomes popular, there are always people who are just trying to be negative and diss it along with the people who enjoy it. i'm NOT making this post to be rude or offensive to people who genuinely don't like the author or the series, ur absolutely entitled to ur own opinion!!! however i have just seen this link SO MANY TIMES of people suddenly disliking something/someone bc a lot of woman seem to enjoy it and it just makes me a bit sad and disappointed.

(also side note can men stop hating on the romance genre and books they haven't even read? please??? can feminine people like anything anymore??? romance exists as such a successful genre bc the majority of readers are WOMEN who have to create fictional scenarios about being loved by seemingly "unachievable" men that are literally just doing the bare minimum. women fantasize about being treated with BASIC HUMAN RESPECT as though that isn't the standard, bc honestly, it isnt.)

THIS POST IS NOT MEANT TO EXCLUDE ANY OF MY FELLOW NON-FEMALE/NON-WOMAN OR GENDER NON CONFORMING FOLK WHO ALSO ENJOY ROMANCE!!!! THIS IS JUST A GENERALIZATION BASED ON THINGS I HAVE NOTICED, AND I AM NOT EDUCATED/HAVE A DEGREE ON THE MATTER!!!! THIS IS SIMPLY AN OBSERVATION!!!!! IF UVE READ THIS LONG, MWAH MWAH MWAH!!!

[ca-suffit]

hey im pretty new to the fandom and joined in october of last year when I watched season 1. i'm not really privvy to the books of the fandom prior to the shows released. I didn't even know that louis was supposed to be a yt slave owner until afterwards (which was very upsetting to read abt as a black viewer of the show who was considering reading the books) and i was reading about how the fandom doesn't like maven (ive watched a few videos but not many). I was reading through the posts and I'm still confused lol. could you explain it more, is it more subtle things or like outward things. /gen

it's p obvious things that that side of the fandom pretends isn't real so they can bully others. she's never been liked in the fandom except by bland white book fans. once the show came out and the fandom was less white, it was still ppl who luv white fandom who ever cared for her.

she can't talk about racial topics at all, her comment sections are known to platform racists (which she's had excuses for but don't they always), and she's friends with the whole og white woman book fandom. she's had awareness of many, many times the fandom has abused ppl for speaking up against racism and she's never used her platform to expose that because she's on their side. those are her friends.

she's a white woman who thinks she's not racist. she's had a platform for years and had access to this fandom for years and yet doesn't meaningfully engage with anyone or anything to understand the show she's talking about. u can remain stupid af about race in anne rice world because she was also stupid af. if u want to position urself as someone worthy of commenting on the *show*, u better do homework. she hasn't.

u can see from her attempt to join the fandom here more last month how fucking terrible her understanding of race or characters is (this is an addition I didn't see until now and mentions more details of issues in specifics). she also pretended that I blocked her, when she finally decided to reply to me, to immediately assume the position that she was somehow a victim to me. her "nice" voice is clearly bullshit, it's abusive in intent. she has never done anything to learn more or help anyone but herself. she's full of shit and relying on her few "fans" to coddle her so they can continue to dismiss how many ppl have seen her problematic behavior over the years, which is a typical white woman tactic. always the victim, never the aggressor. if only *my* tone were nicer, maybe she'd listen, if only I wanted to be on her side and help her more. All of this somehow reliant on *me* and everyone else instead of her owning responsibility for wanting to be on youtube in the first place. if u want to claim to be an expert then don't be such a whiny bitch when hoards of ppl tell u ur wrong and causing harm.

[bloody-wonder]

omg im the tsc anon, i literally sent it cause i knew from the past aftg opinions you shared - you'd likely feel similarly to the way i did about tsc

neil outshines jean to such a shocking degree when he only has a handful of scenes... neil is a fantastic protagonist so ofc it's hard to live up to, but come on 😭 jean has such a weaker personality imo? he does/says less interesting things, but also has a less interesting perspective on things. his lack of standing up for himself when the trojans badgered him constantly and talked behind his back bothered me to. can u imagine neils reaction if the foxes had been sharing his secrets over a group chat?

but just in general. tsc felt like a sanitised version of aftg, if that makes sense? scrubbed clean of the controversial and unconventional aspects. and it's those aspects that, in my opinion, played a huge part in what made aftg so good. noras a very talented writer, but i can not comprehend the decision to make tsc... all that it was, yknow? it feels almost like it was written for the 'andreil say ily' part of the fandom...

neil really saved this book for me icl. outsider pov of him is fascinating. and while andrew barely said/did anything even when he was there, i actually kinda liked that? it puts into perspective how ig off-putting andrew can appear to those who don't put in the effort with him. 'creepy little goalkeeper' is so funny and so accurate, he IS a creepy little goalkeeper and i love that for him.

idk, some things i had anticipated - the trojans being who they are were never going to match the foxes. jeremy x jean was never going to match andreil (and ive seen ppl comparing them already... the blasphemy.) but there were things i was surprised weren't there. i had expected kevin and jeans relationship to be a lot more tense ig? i had thought jean would harbor a MUCH deeper resentment towards kevin, but i suppose its just not his character? but when i was reading, i couldn't help asking what would the fan reaction had been if that had been the case? if kevin and jeans past relationship, and places in a cult hierarchy, had shown through in a much uglier and uncomfortable way? i can see why she didn't do that, i don't even necessarily want that, i think i was just desperate for this book to have some sort of deep conflict between the characters.

on the subject, kevin felt quite different from how he was in aftg. but i can't quite put my finger on why.

anyway, it is nice to see someone else have mixed feelings towards the book. i enjoyed it, but i was shocked how many people seemed to really love it. not because it was bad. but because, to me, it was so fundamentally different from aftg.

thank you for sharing your thoughts! i suspected you might have written me bc i used to be the resident notorious contrarian of the fandom lol

yeah neil is a textbook example of a protag who drives the plot forward, he has that main character energy which jean totally lacks which makes sense since jean was originally a minor side character. at the same time the differences in their characterization make complete sense in universe due to the different ways they were brought up and the different trauma they faced. so it all comes down to each reader's personal preference: for me, neil's arc is a self-indulgent power fantasy. i think i have a strong sense of self and when i can't achieve something it's due to circumstances so far out of my control it's impossible to overcome them. it's therefore very satisfying to read about neil facing impossible odds and winning thanks to the sheer force of his personality, whereas jean's way of dealing with trauma feels less fun by comparison. but other readers can relate to him more and all the power to them. i do however think tsc does a disservice to its new characters by opening with a rather lengthy recap of how cool the foxes were in the last act of tkm and closing on a chapter where neil comes along and reminds us who the real hero of this story is🤷‍♀️

i don't think tsc has been entirely scrubbed clean of controversial aspects - i saw plenty of reviews complaining about the amount of dark content (in book 4 of a series known for its dark content, le gasp) - but i do think the handling of certain things was less nuanced than in aftg. for instance, both stories have a plot bit about someone unknowingly exposing a character to their abuser which leads to them being retraumatized (jean himself comments on the similarities between drake and grayson). in aftg that someone is nicky - a person andrew knows and trusts, a person the readers grew to care about (lol not me but certainly some other readers) - so his role in the tragic sequence of events is that much more upsetting. rape and abuse is terrible but the fact that a person who means well can exacerbate the issues bc they don't have the framework to understand the other person - that hits so much harder for me personally. so in the end drake is just an evil rapist but nicky is a much more nuanced character bc through him nora questions whether being nice and having good intentions is enough, whose feelings should be centered on in such a complex situation, whose emotional needs should be prioritized etc. by contrast, in tsc that person is lucas - someone we basically just met, who is nothing more than an antagonistic stranger to jean and who we therefore don't care about. which is why when he leads grayson to jean it's like, first of all, duhh. but secondly, bc it happens against the backdrop of the other ("good") trojans' cheerfully patronizing attitude it doesn't come so much as a shocking twist that puts the ways how we deal with complex trauma into an unconventional perspective than as a culmination of everyone disrespecting jean's boundaries all the time - which is likely what nora intended but the overall constellation feels much less interesting to me.

ig this ties into your point about the book lacking the kind of deep conflict aftg had - but maybe that was intentional too, maybe it's supposed to be aftg light in that sense, sort of a post canon character study fic. which i am not opposed to, not everything has to be high plot and tension and grey morality, but unfortunately the emotional core the story relies on in the absence of the plot just didn't work for me. i can accept jean's "weaker" personality, i can understand him not being able to stand up for himself even tho i can't admire it, but i draw the line at how forced his friendship with jeremy and the girls ended up feeling. like, i still can't get over cat's sex toy joke right on the heels of jean being badgered into admitting he had been sexually abused - the info which jeremy promptly spilled to the girls. if something like that happened to me i would never be able to trust these people again, much less call them friends so soon. it's such a bizarre contrast between how neil joining the monsters in tfc despite their problematic initiation rituals feels valid bc the narrative earned it both plot-wise (we're now facing a bigger enemy together) and character-wise (neil pushing back, talking about why they did it, nicky apologizing) on the one hand - and how jean accepting jeremy, cat and laila as his new friends feels rushed and artificial despite them being so very nice and domestic and wholesome on the other hand. idk maybe it's bc i'm inherently skeptical about disingenuous cozy/hopepunk subgenres in modern lit bc they usually have a darker underbelly people are loath to confront but ngl the words sanitized and conventional did come to mind while reading and so did the idea that tsc will especially appeal to a certain subset of fans which found the (at times uncomfortable) complexity of the original trilogy too much to handle. well, i hope they're enjoying their fantasy of healing a survivor of cptsd by cooking and shopping and hugs - i certainly got to enjoy mine in aftg, there's plenty to go around lol

besides, tsc being so different/separate from aftg makes it really easy to just not engage with the fan content and discussions if it starts feeling like they veer into the annoying territory too much. tbh my primary concern when tsc was announced was that it could contain some retcons about andreil and aftg which i wouldn't agree with - and that didn't happen, my boys are still very much in character, so i can just retreat to my enclosure and leave tsc to jean stans who are its main target audience in any case.

[riddlerosehearts]

HELLO it is the idia anon from like almost two months ago i think. idk if u remember bt i only just saw your response post bc i lowk forget i have tumblr sometimes (adhd so its out of sight out of mind). tbh i completely forgot about my own ask and i was scrolling thru the idiavil tag yet again when i saw your post and i was like "wow, me too anon." and then i realized it was me. IM TYPING THIS IN AN IDIA SHROUD JACKET BTW THE FIXATION HAS CONSUMEDME. i think abt twst so much. I HOPE U DO NOT MIND ME RAMBLING I WAS GOING TO GET TO AN ACTUALLY IMPORTANT THING.

I LOVED READING YORU HEADCANONS THEY GIVE ME LIFE. i have a tonn of idiavil hcs and au ideas but ive not rlly written any of them (band au that im mega obsessed with is collecting dust in my notes app. i just can't form coherent thoughts). i could soend hours talkign abt idiavil I LUOVE THEM.

ur mention of xenoblade chronicles and kingdom hearts rlly makes me want to play both of them... i know a bit about kh and i want to play it but i know nothing abt xenoblade chronicles... ANYWAYS THANK U FOR THE LOST. I THINK I MIGHTHAVE UNDIAGNOSED AUTISM o(≧▽≦)o

oh i do remember you!! i wish i could forget i had tumblr sometimes LOL, instead i'm way too active on here and keep making myself so busy with different creative projects on my blogs that i'll never have time to post everything i'd like to post. i love when people ramble in my inbox though so no worries!!

omg if you ever post any headcanons or fic about that band AU i would love to see 👀 i have so many ideas that i never do anything with because i'm not much of a writer but i too could talk about idiavil and my other twst ships for hours so i totally get that lol. here's another bonus idiavil HC for you: idia feels really embarrassed about saying affectionate things face to face so he sends vil cute texts disguised as game notifications. things like "congratulations! you've reached max affection with idia! ❤". he also sends vil love letters with roses attached... in animal crossing. and then he secretly hopes vil never finds the time to open up his game and read them because he thinks he might die of embarrassment, but unfortunately for him, vil does read them and he sends a letter back every single time.

and okay so. iirc i made a kingdom hearts reference in that post but just mentioned xenoblade in the tags because it's so much less popular/recognizable. but i was originally going to make a reference to xenoblade chronicles 1. i love the whole series and if you like lengthy JRPGs with unique combat and wild stories then you'd probably love it too! but i feel like idia would love XC1 in particular because a major theme of that game's story is that it's about fighting for the freedom to choose your own future. it's about spending your life feeling like you're powerless to change anything, and then allowing yourself to see that that isn't true--that if you keep looking forward and choose not to give up, you can create a world where you can shape your own destiny. you can go the distance. i think it's a story that would really resonate with idia. now, do i think he would see these themes as being applicable to his own life in a realistic way? absolutely not lol, at least not before the events of book 6, but he'd love the fantasy of it. he'd also relate to shulk--the main protagonist of the game--partly for spoilery reasons and partly because shulk is a fucking nerd who resents having to go outside and would rather spend all day in his research lab working with machines. and now i've rambled on about a game you haven't played lol, but if it isn't obvious by now i highly recommend it! and kingdom hearts is my favorite game series of all time so i highly recommend it as well. fun fact: idia's voice actor, kouki uchiyama, also voices roxas in the japanese version of KH!

[okerum]

to the people of tumblr. i implore you to read my favorite book series of like 6 years, the shattered realms by cinda williams chima, which contains my #1 ship of all time and happens to have like 5 other fans on planet earth and im not sure any of them are alive today. you cannot give up at the first book you have to make it to book 3 because thats when my alltime favorite characters start getting more attention (in the first two they're established as antagonists from other characters' povs but theyre trying to do good :c)

if it'd help persuade a single person, i drew all the main characters here as well.... i just need someone to talk to about desvan....... please ......

if u want more info abt the series, it's a young adult wartime fantasy that has a good amount of focus on the political aspects of the war. my fav is destin karn, lieutenent and spymaster for the 2 kings of the antagonistic kingdom :P

he and evan are in a canon queer relationship which brings me such joy and its such a fun dynamic, with a troubled soldier x free pirate, bonded through an unlikely encounter. they have such fun exchanges as well!

when i say i need someone to talk to about it i MEAN it i would like nothing more than to compare notes i have been keeping this to myself since early middle school and theres, like, one substantial post abt the series on tumblr and no other social media apps and hardly any more fics about it. ive reread the third and fourth books probably like 8 times (+ at least 8 more for just the beginning of book 3 and the end of book 4) and it just sits in my head rotting because i can only turn destin and evan over in my microwave brain so many times before they get burnt or something

this is a cry for help and tumblr is my final hope. tumblr, home of the niche fandoms and readers and also gay people.... heed my call !!! i beg of thee!!!!! read my favorite series !!!! whole post literally begging and pleading!!!!

[1d1195]

I LITERALLY SPENT ALL DAY READING HONEY DURING ALL MY FREE TIME AND UGHHHH☹️🫶🫶🫶🫶 THEYRE SOOOOO CUTE my goodness when he went down in the towel, PLS SHES SO MUCH STRONGER THAN ME I WOULDVE FOLDED FASTER THAN A LAWN CHAIR✋

I WAS SO SCARED THEY WERE GOING TO TAKE BABY CECE🥺 but MC was too smart for them so ofc not. THE HALLUCINATING ??? AND HIM BEING THE REASON SHE GOT OUT ???😭😭😭 GOSH i can imagine her telling him that after some time and he just…. bawls. because that is SO precious. AND HOW SHE KNEW IN SOME WAY THAT HE WAS CLOSE BY UGHHHH

IM PRETTY SURE I GOT THAT PAPER KITES SONG RECOMMENDED TO ME ON APPLE MUSIC BECAUSE OF PAINT AND HOW MUCH IVE LISTENED TO IT SINCE U SENT IT SO I KNEW I HAD TO SHARE, SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT <3333

(i know EXACTLYYYY what you mean. like, i can love a song and listen to it all the time but the second i hear something too much on the radio its just…no. HAHAHA. ALSOOOO THERE IS DEF SOMETHING ABT HIS SONG LET IT GO BECAUSE I WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING)

honestly i don’t even know, everyone is probably so done with me and my bs. i don’t want to sound ungrateful because things are so awesome but i just have NOT been feeling myself here at all. i don’t want to go out anywhere or see anybody, im so done with being perceived😭 the people we know are just wayyy to judgy, talking to them is literally draining. i’m always soooo tired, for some reason my hormones are different here and i went through the. ABSOLUTE. WORST. PMS-ING. LIKE… TERRIBLE. and things with my dad are :/// (when are they not though pfftt) i feel like my days are the same?? the only thing that changes are my outfits but i have this weird feeling like my life is on pause when it should be the opposite. i’m feeling veryyyy nostalgic for fall-winter last year.

i LOVE enjoying the little things, it really does make your day-to-day life just a little better. shifting your closet is soooo cool girl, i feel like you just get to enjoy the different times of year more wholly, you know ? COFFEE HERE IS TERRIBLE IM SO JEALOUS I MISS MY DAILY ICED COFFEE😭😭 and gilmore girls is ALWAYS right🫶 i hope you find time to read soon, other than a fanfic here and there i haven’t been reading either, i brought a bunch of books with me that are literally just sitting on a shelf. BUT I 100% GET WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT READING A CERTAIN PART OF A BOOK JUST TO FEEL SOMETHING, i am unfortunately VERY guilty of this😞🫣 wishing you and your book boyfriends a very happily ever after 😉 AHH NOT A WEDDING😭😭😭 HAHAHA i do hope you end up having a ton of fun tho. and is it just me, or is there always a certain, something in the air when it reaches this time of year?? just a different kind of craziness than the rest of the year.

you are an absolute sweetheart and I WANTED TO TELL YOU, MY SISTER ABSOLUTELY ADORED LOVE & OTHER WORDS. LIKE, SHE WAS OBSESSED WITH IT. and i was all “omg yeahhh a friend recommended it to me☺️😌” BECAUSE WE AREEE FRIENDS !!!

i think the ranting got a lil out of hand so i’m sorry about that but THANK YOU FOR BEING SO AWESOME AND FUN TO TALK TO, IM SENDING YOU ALLLLL THE LOVE, MWAHHHHH

~🎶

Ma'am you give me some of the best ideas for check-ins. MAKING HARRY BAWL HIS EYES OUT IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE PAST TIMES. She's way stronger than me, I would have pulled that towel clean off and had a different kind of breakfast.

Idk how many hours it's been but I haven't moved on from this Paper Kites song, I'll check back in when I move onto Gregory and James.

Things can be going well and you can still feel out of sorts. I really struggle with going out and being social. I have a pretty small social battery. Also dads are the worst more often than not. I'm convinced. My bf was telling my best friend some stories about some of my rage fits I've had in the past (they still happen but they're not as bad as of late) and I'll tell you exactly what (WHO) the common denominator was in each story. Are you still out of the country at this point? Will you be coming back home soon(ish)? I honestly feel like you're homesick, maybe? Being on pause is difficult. It adds to the drained feeling. Hopefully something changes so you can get back into the swing of things and start feeling less stuck 💕

My sister did a semester abroad in europe and I know europe specifically is weird about ice. Or maybe I'm just INSANE (obvi) because I love ice so much. I want my drink cold. I probs use more ice than liquid but I don't even care. ANYWAY. Upon reading more of your message, I kind of feel like you're going through iced coffee withdrawals and if you had one all your emotions would be cured (I hope you're reading this sarcastically because of course I'm joking because I know it's more than that, but I'm hoping you know what I mean). I'm almost certain coffee fixes everything.

Me and my book bfs will def live happily ever after. The -ber months are so busy. It's insane. There's def something in the air.

I LOVE THAT SHE LOVED IT AND OF COURSE WE'RE FRIENDS 💕 I sincerely think it's one of the best books I've ever read. I had an idea to write about Harry based off it. Maybe one day. It's lost to the drafts along with a 100 other things I want to write 😭

This is a ranting blog and there's no such thing as out of hand. I'm so happy to hear from you. I was missing you so much 💕

xoxo

[magic-is-something-we-create]

Hi magesmith

It's send an ask Sunday because I say it is. If your ocs were books on your shelves, what would they be? (You may categorize by actual plot or the covers or the colors of the spine, idc)

HI SLEEPY THIS IS A FANTASTIC ASK AND I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT SINCE I GOT IT AND I LOVE YOU THANK YOU

ok so i decided to keep this to the goddess-touched cast (specifically the narrators of gt itself because otherwise we'd be here for a week) and fair warning it has been years since ive read some of these books im vibe-checking so take some of these with a grain of salt. but trust me in that when i read these i loved all of them deeply

anyways first up we have EMBER whose vibes i tend to read as desperate to keep their family alive, signed up to do one thing to help them and a few others and ended up being dragged kicking and screaming into far greater importance than they ever wanted or thought possible, and extremely competent in battle while simultaneously not wanting to be, i have assigned them The Hunger Games and Red Rising, simply because i feel like they'd fit right in with both casts and maybe would Get the protags of both in ways not many others do

next we have NIMBUS whose vibes are that of extremely good at one thing and lacking in almost all other areas and constantly feels like the odd one out, no matter where he goes he's a puzzle piece that looks like it fits perfectly but once the puzzle's all done he's still there and because that has very isekai vibes in-context (he's extremely tech-literate in a context where there's no tech to literate, and as soon as he's in the context where that becomes useful he's actually like a grandma who doesn't know what phishing is and thinks facebook is google compared to the people around him) he is The Search for Wond-La and a bit of Skyward

with ANNIE a lot of her story right now is quite, uh, unexpected if you've read Firebreathers and extremely out of left field if you know her solely from what I've talked about on here, but i'll sum it up as constantly being underestimated and using that to her advantage, while only people equal to her skill are able to clock that she's hyper-qualified for the thing she's being put up to and thus i have assigned her The Will of the Many and Mistborn

and finally of all the main narrators (there's a couple others who have had very sparse chapters here and there, these four dominate this book) we have DUSK!!!! aka my beloved most favoritest oc who i like to treat like a terrier chew toy. his vibes are fairytale cunning re: exploiting loopholes and oversights in others' words, teenage immortality complex, and researcher at heart who simply wants the rest of the world to understand that science and progress are important. thus i assign him Babel and Iron Widow

thank u for coming to (and inspiring) my ted talk <3

[niningtori]

OFC i have ur notifs on….why wouldn’t i 👁️ anyway Update.. so i agree with u about teeth having character like i do like the look of it sometimes but my jaw is bothering me and apparently i need my wisdom teeth taken out 😭😭😭😭 so it’s all affecting my teeth and jaw and bite. the nice orthodontist lady told me she felt bad bc i had already had treatment but if i wanted to go thru with it then let’s!!! she was very specific on what she would do and how my initial ortho left my teeth kinda crazy PLS! she said most of the time they just worry about the teeth looking straight n the cosmetics r not that important…makes sense. also the way i had checked out four library books at the beginning of the summer and only finished one n im halfway thru little women and have not opened the others like ok! ive run out of renewals.. im gonna go ask if they will renew it for me again.. cuz i already went in n asked for more time JDNDSJJS also back on the dating apps… quite literally SICK! i need attention 😟🐰 how r u hehehe

omg that's awful your previous ortho needs to PAY for what they've done but i'm glad your new one seems nice!! hopefully she'll be able to fix everything 😭 i'm sure she will tho since she has a plan. i hate my ortho real bad which is partially why i don't wanna go back like i cannot even tell u how many times he's spit in my mouth on accident like EW??? also the library book thing is so real BEBSJJWKSKSKS that's why i like audiobooks these days bc i can multitask when i read em. i read little women when i was younger but i literally never touched it again bc i was pissed that jo and laurie didnt end up together IDGAFFFF. what other books did u check out? and i get it i prob wouldnt ask for a renewal cuz im shy but i feel like u should do it!! not u back on dating apps tho... good luck soldier 🫡

i'm doing ok i've been beefing w my close friend's soon to be ex husband and his gf like crazy like ik y'all think i'm nice and i generally am but i get real evil when i get mad so i cussed him and the girl he cheated w out on social media 😭 he's still msging my other friends talking crazy but ig he's too scared to msg me bc i dragged him and his new girl to HELL and now i'm blocked on everything 🤕 also working on an iron man so i will prob post that rlly soon 😽