#take all my money hahahahahaha

[accio-victuuri]

i really need a physical copy of yibo’s ep. idc if it’s just two songs. put in instrumentals or remix. release multiple versions. give us everything! 🙏🏼

[jinwoosbabyboo]

Moments Posts - MC

Random posts on the TL from MC ... I love how even in the game all the boys comment on MCs posts

misshuntermc

♥️ liked by_thedrzayne, seagod_raf_, lumiere.who and 130k others

misshuntermc: bad bitch with a baddie friend

tagged: liiisa_

comments

liiisa_: with a baddie friend

↳ talkthat_tara: I love seeing two bad bitches ↳ misshuntermc: two bad bitches ↳ liiisa_: two bad bitches be friends

_thedrzayne: Pretty girl 🩵

skye.109: Gorgeous 😮‍💨

↳ liiisa_: me? ↳ skye.109: No ↳ liiisa_: 🥲

seagod_raf_: why are you so fine wtf 🫠🫠

lumiere.who: Good lord 😍

nene.nero: mc got these boys BARKIN in her comment section 🥴

↳ thing1_luke: riiiigght ↳ talkthat_tara: must be nice

thing2_kieran: a bad bitch that's wearing my gloves WHO SAID THAT??? 🫨

↳ misshuntermc: that block button looking real good now 😌 ↳ thing2_kieran: I was just playing 🥺

misshuntermc

♥️ liked by skye.109, _thedrzayne, seagod_raf_ and 101k others

misshuntermc: Look at Tara looking tf GOODT

tagged: talkthat_tara

comments

seagod_raf_: no lie im only looking at you 👀

↳ thomasthomas_: this aint about mc ↳ seagod_raf_: its always about mc 😡

lumiere.who: I can't take my eyes off you

skye.109: im looking at you looking tf goodt

_thedrzayne: I see no one else but you mc

liiisa_: Tara babes you look stunning honey 🤤

↳ talkthat_tara: thank you Lisa I love you 😘 ↳ misshuntermc: ignore the boys you stole the show babes

yvannamama: girl where was my invite? 🧐

↳ misshuntermc: I invited you and you said you had to work ↳ yvannamama: damn this job

misshuntermc

♥️ liked by talkthat_tara, nene.nero, imjenna and 127k others

misshuntermc: We got Jenna to come out somebody pinch me

tagged: talkthat_tara, liiisa_, imjenna

comments

imjenna: you girls know how to have fun

↳ liiisa_: same time next week? ↳ imjenna: absolutely not ↳ talkthat_tara: well we tried

lumiere.who: so this is what you four were up to while the rest of us worked overtime?

↳ talkthat_tara: you sound like a hater ↳ liiisa_: look man I'm just a girl ↳ misshuntermc: I don't make the rules here 🤷🏾‍♀️

nene.nero: I had an extra 3 hours of paperwork because of this

↳ imjenna: are you complaining? ↳ nene.nero: n no ma'am ↳ misshuntermc: she got you stuttering in the replies ☠️☠️

misshuntermc

♥️ liked by skye.109, gray_sun, yvannamama and 115k others

misshuntermc: Staying out until 4am as if we don't have an 8am job to get to

tagged: talkthat_tara, liiisa_

comments

imjenna: this explains why you were late

↳ misshuntermc: it won't happen again it was Neros fault

nene.nero: now why am I in it??? 🤨

↳ talkthat_tara: you decided to question us for 30 minutes when we walked in the door ↳ nene.nero: it was work related ↳ misshuntermc: should've let us clock in first

skye.109: lmk when you're ready to quit working so you don't have to worry about that anymore

↳ _thedrzayne: don't worry I got her ↳ seagod_raf_: relax boys she's with me I'll take care of her ↳ lumiere.who: if anyone is taking care of her its gonna be me

thing2_kieran: uh oh the girls are fighting^^

↳ thing1_luke: Boss will win ↳ thomasthomas_: idk Rafayel is crazy I'd bet money on him ↳ whosjeremiah: Xavier punched me in the mouth for mispronouncing mc's name once ↳ gray_sun: he'll never admit it but Zayne shoulder checked tf out of me so he could speak to mc first

misshuntermc

♥️ liked by talkthat_tara, nene.nero, imjenna and 135k others

misshuntermc: Picture was perfect and this bitch fell on me 🙄

tagged: liiisa_

comments

liiisa_: bitch I told you to hold me up while I fixed my shoe

↳ misshuntermc: you barely gave me a second to ready myself ↳ nene.nero: I would've let her fall ↳ talkthat_tara: stop hating we invited you out and you declined

thing1_luke: HAHAHAHAHAHA loser

↳ misshuntermc: this is why Kieran is my favorite ↳ thing1_luke: stop don't say that 🥺 ↳ thing2_kieran: i will gladly hold the crown of being the favorite 😋 ↳ skye.109: can you not pit these 2 against each other they're getting on my nerves

[Direct message to Sylus]

misshuntermc: you're my favorite 😘 skye.109: Hell yea 😌

[subfootboii]

"Yeah piggy you like those big alpha feet... yeah I bet you do. HAHAHAHAHAHHA, look at all those people laughing at you. Yeah humiliate yourself on stream in front of thousands of viewers. Yeahh keep sending that money. Good pig."

footpiggy89: Yes ALPHA MASTER. I'm a degenerate pig.

footpiggy89: I sent more ALPHA MASTER. You can take all my money. I'm a loser worthless pig.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I bet your family are proud of you loser. Yeah look at my alpha feet, send money and jerk your dicklet off. Feet? How worthless can you be."

footpiggy89: Please ALPHA MASTER make more fun of me. I'm a pig. I'm worthless. I'm a degenerate. Here I'll send more. I'm close to cumming ALPHA MASTER can you please give me permission too.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, yeah you can cum you weirdo pig. Cum for my feet. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Yeah keep your payments flowing. Good pig."

footpiggy89: Oh I came. Thank you so much ALPHA MASTER and viewers for humiliating me and making fun of me.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA, you pathetic loser, cum for feet, HAHAHAHAHAHA. Be sure to pass by every stream piggy. I'll dry your bank account with those alpha feet, while I show everyone how worthless you are."

[arc-misadventures]

What are Those?! AU: After finding out that Jaune hoards gems how many of the girls decide to try and use gemstones to try and get into his bed

Diamonds Are A Dragons Prize

Pyrrha: Hey, guys how’s it…

Weiss: I don’t care who the hell your gem grader was father! I had the, Lapidary Master himself graded all of my diamonds, and he identified that almost all of them are fake! They’re not diamonds, they’re Cubic Zirconia! Fake Diamonds! So you will bring all of our precious gems, Mom’s, Winters, yours, and even mine to, Beacon, right here, right now! Before your precious net value plummets even further then it already has!

(Beep.)

Weiss: Prick…

Pyrrha: Uhhh… D-Did I miss something…?

Blake: Oh, we learned, Jaune hoards precious gems; diamonds, rubies, and the like. So people have been giving him precious stones as a… dowery of sorts. But, Jaune apparently is super rich because he owns several mining companies that mine specifically, precious stones. So, Jaune has been inspecting, giving people prices, and proof of their stones value instead.

Pyrrha: And, he did that for, Weiss’s diamonds as well?

Blake: Yeah, for her ‘diamonds.’

Weiss: My fakes! Tens of thousands of Lien were spent collecting diamonds, and other precious gems for my family. I brought approximately 67,000 Lien worth of diamonds with me to, Beacon!

Ruby: 67,000?! You had that much money kept in a simple latch lock box in our bathroom?!

Weiss: Well the fuck does that matter now?! 67,000?! I’ve got less than three grand of real diamonds in that chest! My father bought fakes! Millions of Lien worth of fakes!

Pyrrha: Oh, so that’s why she’s so upset.

Nora: Yeah, it’d be like if I had a mountain of pancakes, and they were all foam…

Blake: That… Sounds like a, Nora analogy.

Pyrrha: She’s been having nightmares about it for the past week…

Ruby: It’d be like having a dream about eating chocolate chip cookies, and it turns they’re all oatmeal raisin…

BP: …

Pyrrha: So where’s, Yang?

Ruby: Hmm? Oh she was taking a engagement ring, Dad gave her mother foe, Jaune to grade it. She wanted to know if it had any worth to it.

Nora: Is she going to sell it?

Ruby: I think she said something about seeing if mom abandoned something else of value besides her, and dad.

Pyrrha: Ohh…

Blake: Uhh…

Weiss: …

Nora: Nice~!

Ruby: Yeah… Yang’s mom is… is something else…

Yang: And, a fucking idiot~!

Ruby: Yang, you’re back!

Pyrrha: Hello, Yang, good news I take it?

Yang: Hell yeah~! Jaune just apprised this wedding ring I have, and he gave me one hell of a price on it~!

Pyrrha: Oh, how much?

Yang: Well, Jaune described it as a: Light yellow diamond, Class Z. 3 carats in weight. Custom Cut. Valued at approximately, 30,000 Lien~!

Pyrrha: Oh my gods…

Ruby: W-W-What…?!

Nora: How many pancakes could I eat with that…?

Weiss: 3-3-30,000…?! M-My diamonds were nearly 70,000. Then, Jaune graded them, a-and it turn out most of them were fake! A-And, I only have 3000 Lien… and, you just go there with some rinky dink ring… and it’s worth ten times that?!

Yang: Yeah, pretty much.

Weiss: …

Weiss: Ah-ha…? Ha. Hahahaha! Ahh-hahahahahaha!

RBYNP: …

Weiss: AHH-haaaaaaa…

Ruby: Got you, Weiss!

Nora: Whoops, she fainted again…

Pyrrha: Again?

Blake: Yeah, she fainted yesterday when she found out, how, and why, Jaune was super rich.

Pyrrha: I best ask him about that…

Blake: Don’t touch his rocks, he’ll gut you if you try.

Pyrrha: W-What…?

Nora: So, Yang; You gonna make a pretty penny, or are you going to keep that?

Yang: Yep~! I’m gonna keep it though. There’s too much sentimental value to get rid of it.

Ruby: Are sure about that…?

Yang: I’m sure; besides if, Jaune picks me as one of his wives, I’m gonna ask him to give it to me as my engagement ring.

Ruby: Oh, that’s ni… Wait! Y-You want become, Jaune’s wife?!

Yang: Well, one of them, I don’t really mind sharing.

Ruby: But, why? Why do you want to marry, Jaune?

Yang: I’ll admit it, I’ve always had a thing for, Jaune. He’s cute, caring, supportive, handsome, and just a really sweet person… I wasn’t going to act on my feels, I was going to let them fade away because, Pyrrha had claim on him, and I’m not the kind of girl to steal another girls man. But, since he’s more, or less open game because of the harem thing… Well, I’ve decided to throw my hat in the ring. Unless… You don’t want me to, Pyrrha…?

Pyrrha: Shoot… I owe, Nora fifty Lien…

Nora: Whoo! Pancake money!

Yang: Wait, did you make a bet on me?

Pyrrha: On whether, or not you liked, Jaune. I bet against, and lost. I just though he wasn’t your type.

Yang: Well, he is! So… Do you mind…?

Pyrrha: Not at all, I wouldn’t mind you joining us at all.

Yang: R-Really?!

Pyrrha: However, it’s his choice to make not mine. So, good luck winning him over.

Yang: Sounds fun~! So, speaking of you, and Jaune~!

Pyrrha: What about it?

Blake: What was it like?

Pyrrha: Oh, that? Well, do you really want me to tell you what happened, or do you want to find that our yourself~?

Yang: Mmmmm… Nooo… I rather be surprised really…

Blake: But, since he put you out of commission for a while; I’d like to know what to expect.

Ruby: Well I don’t! Bye!

(Slam!)

Yang: Good. She’s not ready for such things…

Pyrrha: Well, you know about his tongue, and how long it’s is~!

BY: Yes…

Pyrrha: Well, lets just say he can get it really deep inside of you: Really deep~!

Blake: How deep…?

Pyrrha: Oh, you’ll feel how deep he can get it~!

Blake: And, what is it like, is it more human, or is more faunas…?

Yang: Faunas?

Blake: Depending on the faunas, they sometimes have more… animal bits.

Yang: S-Seriously?! I thought that was some sort of racist talking point?!

Blake: Yeah�� There’s a bit of truth to every stereotype. We don’t like to talk about it, because its… It’s just uncomfortable to talk about for all of us.

Yang: I-Is, Jaune like that…?!

Nora: Nope! It’s a perfectly normal human penis!

BYP: …

Yang: H-How do you know that…?

Pyrrha: Nora, likes to peek on us in the shower…

Yang: Oh, okay… So, uhh… what is it like?

Pyrrha: I’ll just say this… He’ll ruin you for all other men, forever, and you’ll love it~!

BY: NICE!!!

~~~

Ruby: Hey, Jaune!

Jaune: Hi, Ruby.

Ruby: How goes the gem collecting?

Jaune: I’ve found some interesting gems, like this one.

Ruby: Whoa… That’s beautiful… What is this…?

Jaune: That is a, Moss Agate Opal. One of my sister’s likes to wear these, so I got it for her.

Ruby: Aww, how sweet of you.

Jaune: I may like my stones, but I love my family even more…

Ruby: You don’t sound so certain on that.

Jaune: Depends on the stones…

Ruby: Okay…

: Excuse me, would you take a look at this?

Jaune: Oh, of course! Allow me to… Well hello there~!

Ruby: What is it?

Jaune: Oh, aren’t you a beautiful little thing~!

Ruby: Is that a sapphire?

Jaune: Hmm?! No! No not even close.

Ruby: Then what is it?

Jaune: While it may appear like one, but this isn’t anywhere close to a sapphire.

Ruby: Then what is it?

Jaune: Tanzanite, one of the rarest gems you can find. It doesn’t have the same value as a diamond, but they can only be found in one place, hence the rarity. And, considering where that is, they tend to hoard them.

Ruby: Where’s that?

Jaune: Menagerie. Isn’t that right, Miss…?

: Sienna, Sienna Khan, High Leader of the White Fang.

Jaune: Hmmm. Well, this is certainly one fine introduction letter. So, what can I do for you, Miss Khan?

Sienna: Oh so many things, my King. Oh so many things~!

[thearoaceshark]

Gosho Girls Incorrect Quotes, Part 2

@quite-a-character I'm BACK!! I hope u like it

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Haibara: I already told you it's not like that!

Sonoko: Well one of us is wrong, AND IT'S NOT GONNA BE ME!!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Aoko, speaking of Akako: Help! I lost my friend, have you seen her?!!

X: How does she look?

Aoko: Beautiful!

Akako, behind her holding two ice creams: *dying of cuteness*

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ran: The best revenge is to ignore them.

Sonoko: Or frame them for a crime.

Akako: Or curse them.

Ran: NO–

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Haibara: We have to go out!

Sera: I'm pansexual!

Haibara: That's not what I meant but I support you!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Akako, telling them how she met Kaito: he rejected me, and in that moment I understood how ugly people felt.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Aoko: You have no idea what I'm capable of.

Sera: Not to offend you, but I feel like I'm being threatened by a cupcake.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sonoko: If I'm your favorite, raise your hand.

Ran: What if you're not my favorite?

Sonoko: Raise your standards.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ayumi: What happens if we stop being friends?

Haibara: The day we stop being friends will be because we will be (platonically) married and united for the rest of the eternity.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Aoko: Akako has a... Unique way of showing her love.

Kazuha: Look. Akako!

Akako: ??

Ran: We love you.

Akako, smiling: I would kill and curse the world for you.

All: ...

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sera: What's the straightest thing you've ever done?

Akako: *sighs heavily* ...I killed a guy.

Both: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sera: Who ate my candy?! I swear that–

Ayumi: It was me.

Sera: I'll shower you with kisses and bring you more sweets because you haven't eaten enough!!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sonoko: Hey Ran, how is your boyfriend?

Ran: Missing... Or hiding. And you know.

Sonoko: Exactly, I just wanted to remind you.

Ran: ...

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Akako, tasting Kazuha's food: I think this one lacks salt.

Kazuha: Are you implying that I don't know how to cook?

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Haibara: *coughs violently*

Conan: Don't die!

Haibara: Don't tell me what to do!

Ayumi, with a glass of water: Drink water!

Haibara: Okay.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sonoko: Akako, those clothes look amazing on you! But I bet it would look better on the floor of Aoko's room.

Aoko: Are you flirting with Akako for Aoko?

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ayumi, learning how to drive: What happens if I press the gas and the brake at the same time?

Sera: The car takes a screenshot.

Ran: Please pull over. I’m driving now.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sera: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.

Akako: And you came to me?

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Kazuha: That's not funny.

Akako: I thought it was funny.

Kazuha: You don't count. You started laughing in the middle of a funeral.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ran: I have a bad feeling about this, guys.

Sonoko: Oh don’t worry, you’ll be fine.

Sera: Yeah, what’s the worst that could happen?

*The next morning*

Ran, being bailed out of jail: I hate you all.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Haibara: Nothing feels better than winning Monopoly. Not love, not sex, not free pizza, nothing!

Aoko: I’m sorry, have you tried pizza?

Haibara: Yes, and it doesn’t compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friend’s eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate.

Sonoko: I like you.

[ragingstillness]

Finally getting around to watching CM:E

Thoughts thus far:

Rossi is sad and I remain pissed that they killed Krystal for no reason

Grey!Em is still my favorite thing

Happy to hear some swearing, the original show needed more of it

Let Rossi say fuck 2k24

“Remote Garcias” “we’re not gonna learn their names” lol Luke stays savage

“Anglophile baking club” oh come on Garcia. We all saw how shockingly queer everyone at that party is. It’s a kiki, plain and simple

Weren’t Luke and Garcia going to go on a date? Oh it’s been three years

“Take your carbs and exit sir” I love Garcia so much

“Hoo-ha” lol, burn Goop to the ground

“Korean drama” it’s a BTS anti unsub

Garcia straight up flapping I love her so much

Damn the writers for this Krystal flashback

Emily is gonna eat this Deputy Director alive

Oh thank fuck at least the rest of Dave’s family is alive

The Galvez cheek kiss *eeeee*

That little head kiss, Rossi’s such a dad/grandad

Damn Sicarius how do you have the time to dig all these holes?

Hahahahahaha I picked up on Tara and Rebecca at the same time as Emily

Waha Tara being openly queer!!!

Paget is like a proud mama that someone in the BAU finally gets to be queer

Dang this cashier girl is like literally saying exactly what I do at work

“My floof” I relate to this girl so hard

“Jagoff!” “Fuckhead!” Get his ass Rossi

Damn this therapy talk is so accurate go Garcia

Garcia and Rossi’s friendship is my Roman Empire

Man I can’t believe Sicarius actually thought that he could control obsessional killers. Dude, they aren’t going to listen to you

Sicarius you anti-retail asshole. I will dream of smashing you in the head with an axe from the hardware store where I work

Emily and Dave walking together both with grey hair look so cool now

“Is everyone but me getting laid?” “I’m not” lol ngl I appreciate the increased sexual humor

That’s my girl Garcia! I hate what it’s gonna do to your mental health to be back but I’m happy to see you

Dude if you’re gonna be a criminal psychopath with these amazing computer skills, how are you not at least making money off of it? Like, there is zero reason for you to be poor. Normally I wouldn’t say that about anyone but dude, are you seriously providing these kill kits for free?

Wait a sec he actually /took/ the dog? He didn’t just kill it? Dickhead!

“This fucking guy” yeah Rossi, read my mind about most unsubs on this show

Rebecca and Tara’s height difference is kind of killing me in this elevator scene they’re so cute

Garcia are you wearing Rocky Horror earrings? Love that

Haha fine furry friends returns

Dang y’all is Rossi the only one allowed to say fuck? It makes him sound like a teenager that just learned all the swear words. Let Garcia say fuck 2k24

I can’t believe that it’s an actual plot line that COVID prevented serial killers from killing so they had to change it up and go online. I’m sure the writers thought it sounded cool but it just sounds silly. What, did Sicarius’ first kill kits also include PPE?

Also why are these guys so willing to kill themselves for Sicarius? They seem like devoted to the cause and frankly, so many of these guys are narcissists and we’ve just seen one defy Sicarius, why are they listening to him? Seriously? No matter what he has on them, why would they consider it more important to follow his orders than their compulsions?

“You two-faced little jerk” yeah I hope he heard that

Soon we’re gonna be seeing Emily’s daydreams about killing people, not just Sicarius’.

Seriously, the idea of Sicarius having money problems is so dumb to me. He’s been shown to have immense resources and technological capability as well as ample time to use them. There is no reason why he should be financially unstable. I get that stuff like private school is expensive but dude, DUDE, you’re running a network of serial killers! It’s not THAT expensive! I feel like this whole plot point is set up to humanize him to a degree and it isn’t working well.

God whatever props guy worked on these posts for the fake forum Sicarius is using had fun. There’s a user named George_Jungle_fkr whose post consists of “I have a waifu, too!!! She lives in the jungle. I fuck in the jungle. I kill in the jungle.” With a profile picture of George of the Jungle. No shit. Pause on that screen, it’s wild. User GetHungry1893 with a post about not judging people and a profile pic of a man with bloody hands sucking on a bone. User NotSoFast with a drag racing car profile pic and with a post titled “I’m getting more guns!” That then goes on to use the phrase “waifu” and *wink wink*. User Tiredoftheblood101 with a bloodspot clipart profile pic and use of the term “OP”, asking about how to kill his MOM (capitalization his). Also in the background a user named Anonymous1232 with the anonymous logo as their profile pic.

Wait Sicarius actually has a real job? He wasn’t just bullshitting about it so he could travel all over the country? What, is running this serial killer network like a side hustle for him? Wait wait wait and he’s going on business trips that the company is actually sending him on? Like he’s following their directives? And driving a company car? This is insane. If they’re gonna characterize Sicarius the way they have been, none of this makes sense. Side note: the guy playing Sicarius is actually a good actor and after some of the previous disappointments (Scratch and the Chameleon) it’s nice to see.

This DEI discussion between Sicarius’ daughter and the redneck neighbor was not something I expected to see in Criminal Minds.

“You fucking beta cuck” yeah pretty much what I’d expect from a guy like this. But also, hysterical to hear incel language being used in real life. Damn man, you just called his daughter a bitch? He’s gonna flay you alive! I wouldn’t provoke anyone like that, even without knowing they’re the head of a serial killer network. Anyone can snap you dumbass.

“Somebody should do something about that guy.” Oh of course she says this to the serial killer. Good lord. “I’m glad you’re not that somebody.” Oh honey yes he is lol. Or he’ll send someone from the network to do it.

Ha I just realized that I carried a case exactly like the kill kit cases when I worked for the Red Cross. Contained equally suspicious things (needles, gauze, etc), if you didn’t know what company I was working for lol.

“Those who bankrolled you” then why is he having money problems god this is so dumb! “I’m not putting a gun to my head” yeah I predicted this would happen.

More hysterical users on Sicarius’ platform: User NotSoFast at it again “I miss my family. Bad aim” User Ript4u, with a muscular torso pic talking about the fruitlessness of love, calling people lemmings, “simps,” “bitchboy,” “I will dominate,” and the delightful paragraph “These bitches think they’re got it all figured out. Walking on a cloud of happy thoughts and unicorn farts.”

Haha Garcia said fan fiction! We made it to the mainstream lol.

“Honey let it go” woman he called your daughter a bitch! I’d punch him for that!

Damn Tara you’re gonna get your gf fired

“Typical bureaucratic bullshit” yes YES the old man is out! Rossi ur a king

Is Sicarius really there in person! That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Oh wow he is what a dumbass! And so close to the bomb zone too! Did you want to get blown up too?!

Yeah bringing in domestic terror was a mistake.

“Excellent. I never wanted it in the first place” also kind of misogynistic to turn to Rossi after Emily rejected you.

“Wank-weasel” Garcia ur my spirit animal

“You’re a hedge fund manager with a badge. You have never done anything” get his ass Emily! I guess after Barnes the BAU has completely lost their patience for bureaucratic dickheads

“I just wanted you to hold my hand” they are soft gfs and I love them

About time one of the unsubs turned on Sicarius

Screw the propaganda that you can just make dogs eat people when they’ve been totally docile and relaxed their whole lives

Hey Sicarius, you remembering how annoying it is to do your own cleanup now?

Who the fuck is this guy Elias is hallucinating?

Genuinely curious how he finds time to make these custom foam inserts for the briefcases

Ok why is it taking so long to identify the victims found from Sicarius? This is set in 2022, DNA is fast and common.

Can’t believe this Tyler guy looked into Garcia enough to send her the encrypted locations but not enough to figure out she literally worked for the FBI. His anger over her handing over the info makes zero sense.

I know a lot of ppl hate Will for getting in the way of Jemily but he’s a very good husband. Patient, intelligent, cute. I like him.

“I believe you, but will Mom?” This new sibling energy between Rossi and Emily is everything. Also that burgundy blazer set is amazing on her.

I think Tyler has a little crush on Garcia. He just wants a woman who will kick his ass.

“Because of you I feel safe in our home” so cute literally so romantic I love them when they’re sweet

Only tangentially related but I’d love to see an episode where a serial killer breaks into another serial killer’s house. Like would it go “whoops my bad” or “you asshole you jacked my plan!” or would they just kill each other

Garcia’s little rant is hilarious

“I’m not a problem. I’m a delight. I’m a little dramatic but wonderful” yes you are Garcia

I almost believe the deputy director truly didn’t want to be overseeing this case. My guess, without watching the episode, is that he wants to prove he has some field experience so Emily can’t use it against him anymore. Also he might have a small crush on her and be a little afraid of Rossi. This season is full of men who like dominant women and I support that. I don’t support any sort of relationship between this man and Emily but I support the concept

“Bullshit. She broke your heart.” Welcome to working with profilers sir.

Also finally figured out what Emily’s scathing inditement of the deputy director reminded me of: it’s Hotch’s profiling of his team to defend them against Strauss

Emily’s smile when she finally got one over the deputy director, so pretty

Garcia and her ‘puter like she literally did the cat meme

Ok the orange crocs are a sin I would throw a folder at him too

Not surprised Will doesn’t have cancer but pissed they even teased us with it.

Haha Garcia is gonna make that dude keep the cat lol

Oh hey Sicarius. Nice to see you. Gonna kill a senator now?

lol Sicarius is like yeah I’m not sticking around for this freaky Oedipal shit. You can bankroll me, but I’m not into voyeurism on this

I know we’re supposed to be worried but 1) using a streaming site undercuts the tension of thinking a character will die and 2) that was the sexiest wheels up ever

Hahaha wow they didn’t even try to give us a realistic justification for Sicarius taking off his shirt

[iguessitsjustme]

Get To Know Me Tag

Tagged by the always lovely @my-rose-tinted-glasses

Do you make your bed?

HAHAHAHAHAHA - I barely wake up in time to get dressed for work. If I make my bed, it's a miracle.

What’s your favorite number?

Any multiple of 5 or the number 7.

What is your job?

I am an administrator at a nonprofit (you would be surprised at how many times I have yelled at a show about things would not Work That Way because admin isn't just....magic. I just don't post about it because it's not typically interesting. Just me being passionate about my chosen career and that is not the point of the shows ever and there would be nothing more boring than watching administration done properly)

If you could go back to school, would you?

If I could afford it, I would get a million degrees. Just for fun. But alas, education is expensive.

Can you parallel park?

Yes, but it takes me a long time and I don't have great depth perception.

A job you had that would surprise people?

I don't think anyone would be surprised by any of the jobs I've had.

Do you think aliens are real?

Yep.

Can you drive a manual car?

No but I want to learn SO BAD. And I've wanted to learn for years I just don't have access to a manual car to learn on.

What’s your guilty pleasure?

If it's a pleasure, I'm not feeling guilty.

Tattoos?

Not yet but hopefully this summer. I have two tattoos I want to get but money is tight and also I'm scared of needles so I need a friend to come with me and hold my hand. I also need to find a tattoo artist I like to do it.

Favorite color?

Green. Any shade of green.

Favorite type of music?

Pop, punk rock, or classical.

Do you like puzzles?

Only if I do them with @neighborhood-yogurt, who does not like puzzles and I get to bully them about it.

Any phobias?

I have phobias yes. And I don't expect my followers would specifically trigger me but I'm not gonna post them for reasons.

Favorite childhood sport?

Childhood? I was an active child. I guess soccer. But I also did gymnastics, karate, tap, and ballet. Though I was VERY young for all of those. Also tennis in high school which I stuck with the longest.

Do you talk to yourself?

I find my conversations with myself delightful.

What movies do you adore?

Anything from Studio Ghibli, Amelie, and Ever After.

Coffee or tea?

Both but lately I've been drinking more coffee.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

Honestly? I think the first thing was an author. There is a small possibility I wanted to be a teacher first though. Now I am neither of those things.

I'm going to tag @heretherebedork and @neighborhood-yogurt if y'all haven't done this already.

[chaifootsteps]

His line of thought was interrupted by the sound of an adult man wailing as he tried to pour more alcohol down his throat, only to miss entirely and have the thing get thrown straight to the floor.

"Satan– (hic) fucking damnit!" Blitz yelled, grabbing at his horns and pulling on them a bit. "This shit alwayss happenssss to me! FUCK!" He tried to get up from the stool, only to fall face first on the floor after missing the step. Striker only watched, with the face of someone seeing a small dog accidentally trip and fall while trying to walk for the very first time. The man was just kind of pathetic, but it was still pretty entertaining.

"Need some help down there, partner?" Striker teased, sipping his own drink. Couldn't get too intimate now, right?

Blitz stopped, moving his head slightly to meet Striker's gaze. Oh, fuck, he's being SO fucking embarassing right now. He's going to get a terrible grade at impressing the cool guy. Something both normal to fear and possible to achieve.

"Ohhhh, uhh, heyyyy Strikerrr-" He said, clumsily trying to get up by balancing himself on the stool, almost falling again in the process. "Haahh– you uhm, didn't see that, did youuu?" 

"I saw every part of it. And it was very funny."

"Hahahahahaha yeah I beeet it was you snake." Blitz finally sat back down again, holding his face in his hands. "Satan's ass… that'sss so embarassin' on my endd."

"It really is." Striker said, handing him the water bottle with a small smile. "Now come on, drink up. Don't need you throwin' up all over somebody today, yeah?"

"Yeah… probably not." He took it in his hands, brushing his fingers against Striker's gloves for a second, and then quickly turning away. "Uh… thankss. N'such."

They both stay quiet for a bit while Blitzo drinks, still kind of regaining his senses from falling, and Striker notices how his eyebrows furrow again. 

"...How come you're out drinkin' on a different ring all by yourself eh? Bird boy wasn't interested in accompanying ya?"

Blitzo's face contorts more, and his grip on the water bottle tightens a lot. Probably the wrong subject to bring up. 

"Oh, he's never fuckin' interested if the topic isn't sex. Doesn't even matter."

"Right." He coughs awkwardly. "What about ya employees? Are they not around for a couple of shots?"

"I kinda ruined their date, so I don't think I even have employees at this point.

Hm. Another miss. This comforting shit is hard.

"...Well, don't you have anyone else you can talk to?-"

"Listen, if you're trying to make me feel bad here for not having any friends, it's working, and I'm REALLY not in the mood to deal with that." Blitzo snaps, turning away

"Well, I'm not. I guess I just-" Striker bites his tongue, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. The words don't come out right. He ends up sighing, "I dunno. I figured someone like you would have plenty. You're not half bad."

Blitzo widens his eyes, like he just heard the most outrageous thing ever. "Really-?" He then coughs, looking away again. "Uhhh. I mean, thanks. I guess.

Silence falls between the two again, but there seems to be a mutual understanding. Blitzo glances back and forth between his water and Striker, who by now is just tracing the glasses' rim with his finger boredly. His eyes watch the ripples in the glass, and for a second Blitzo swears he could see him looking back with those bright yellow eyes…

"...Yer starin."

"Hm-? Oh, sorry. I'm…uh, drunk." He lied. Badly. "ANYWAY I really should get going huh! Wow, this night has been way too long-" he gets off the stool, searching his pockets for any leftover money to pay for his drink, and maybe Striker's nicety if he's got anything aside from coins. "I really should get goin', but it was nice seein' you Striker-" He takes out a few crumpled up bills and leaves them on the counter, then he turns to Striker and puts the rest in his hand. "Consider this uh, payback for not killin' me back at the harvest moon festival. Real lost opportunity, honestly, you shoulda taken it heh-"

Blitzo didn't expect to have the money put back on his hand with a certain gentleness. 

"No. I don't need your money, Blitz. And it wasn't a missed opportunity, because my offer never left the table." He gets off his seat, and puts a hand on Blitzo's shoulder, "You have potential, but it's up to you to see it. Once you end up valuing your services…" He gets closer, smiling mischievously, "Well, then you come back here and find me, yeah?" 

Blitzo felt a shiver run up his spine, but it wasn't out of fear, no. It was good. Really good. "...Yeah, I'll uh, check you out, Striker…"

"You better." He lets go, fixes his hat, and walks away. "See around, Blitz. And remember to call." 

Blitzo is confused for a second, only to notice a business card hidden between the bills on his hand. He's left in the bar dumbfounded for a moment, but eventually makes a move on to leave. He swears on every sin out there that it gets harder every day to reject Striker's proposal…stupid handsome bastard. 

[End! Hope you like it :)]

Absolutely wonderful. I read it in both their voices and wish it was canon; thank you for reminding me of just how much I utterly love these two.

[cbsghostsmetasandtrevor]

CBS Ghosts - Hello! - Game's Over, Sam's Done

Warning - Spoilers May Appear

Clearly, the best way to get Thor to leave them alone is for him to get to watch his viking fellows on TV.  He’s SO into it, I love it.

I wonder if he always uses his TV time just for this?

Jay’s just like “Why waste utilities” and Thor goes from being peacefully distracted by the mission to drive Sam crazy because Jay’s trying to save money and can’t hear him.

Poor Sam - she had inadvertently gotten one to leave her alone, only for Jay to ruin it.  

I do love Thor calling Jay “Small Man”.  I wonder if the TV was enough for him to come around to the idea that they could stay as long as he can see Vikings? Because his demand was just to watch TV.

Also, not really shown in this scene, but the ghosts are easily distracted - Thor with the TV, Isaac and Trevor with Hamilton, Hetty and Flower with the hole in the wall.  Like Half the ghosts abandoned the plan the second they found something more interesting. 

I'm convinced the only ones into the Mission are Pete, Sass and Alberta. I wonder why? Sass - drama? Alberta - her murder? But Pete? Very Curious.

I burst out laughing at the Cholera ghosts - if it isn’t mr fix it.  

They’re mocking him and he has no idea and it cracks me up so much.

Stewart should have gotten Nancy’s screen time, honestly.  He's so funny.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

I KNOW WE’RE DEAD BUT HE’S TRYING TO KILL US!  - I love Stewart - he doesn’t pull back - he’s just like COME ON MAN.  Even though he KNOWS Jay can't hear him.

Those Cholera ghosts have some fun after all.

I love that they’re all yelling as if he can hear them - STOP IT MAN!

OMG this is SO SAD!  Sam’s gotten to the point where she thinks that she’s having a Psychotic Break.   POOR SAM.

This is SO interesting - Hetty was not a part of the whole “drive her to acknowledge us” plan.  BUT because of JAY, she’s now driving Sam crazy (when the ghosts IN on the plan have disappeared?) because she’s like “I can’t deal with a hole in the wall”.

Funny to note - Hetty’s struggling here and I can’t wait to see what she’s like in Season 3 when she actually shares a room with Flower.

LMAO I love that Thor calls it a Sorcerer’s window - he’s like “damn it, woman, I just want to see my people.”

Poor Thor, it’s been so long but he misses his people. On the other hand, Sam's busy losing her mind, Thor.

Aw, Sam.  My heart breaks for her.

This is interesting.  Trevor does this thing where he was going someplace and then stops weirdly when he notices who he’s looking for has been found is in that room.  He does the same thing in the Christmas special - so I wonder if he was looking for Hetty at the time???

Anyway, Boy, Trevor doesn’t take rejection well.  Before he was just a poor puppy excited to find someone and connect with someone, now, he’s like ‘fine, I'll be better off without you’.  

This leads into an interesting part of his psychology.  We know that he wants to be the big man around town, he wants to be the center of attention, he wants to have a connection with someone, and he wants to be included and wanted.  

And when he doesn’t get these things - he feels down and sad - which we see in one of the opening scenes, but quickly, he goes on the offense.  It’s only been like a day and Sam’s going through hell, but he (like ALL of the ghosts) only thinks about what he’s feeling and rejecting it.  He wants to mask his negative feelings and project them onto Sam.  

Thus, going for an offensive attack to get her attention - and it works, somewhat.  But also, it probably worked in life, too, hence doing this.  

Doesn’t excuse him, but I do think that he didn’t do this just to be a jerk, but because he’s just trying to deal with his own emotions in the wrong way is interesting. It doesn't make him any worse than the other ghosts that do the same in various instances.

Also, I think he didn’t start with it because he’s not really *that guy*.  He’s only doing it now because he couldn’t handle the rejection (which ISN’T okay). And he backs off quickly when she runs away to the hospital. We never see him do this, again.

Also, what is that face, Thor? You’re just like ‘whatever’.

And Hetty’s too busy trying to get Sam’s attention to interact with what Trevor’s doing here?  You’d think she’d defend her. Since she does - sort of - like Sam.

POOR SAM - She’s just like “God this is terrible”.

Trevor, boy, there’s nothing genius about this.  But I do love them all chasing her to the stairwell.

APPARENTLY, SAM CAN ESCAPE THEM - evidence?  They don’t go downstairs because “they are terrifying” - how are they terrifying??? I need to know.

is it because they smell? Is it because they are different? I just - need to know.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to reach out and chat :)

[aita-blorbos]

(OCS, same universe AND time period as my last ask) AITA for wanting to make entertainment actually fun?

So I (AdultF) was previously unemployed and living with my beloved sister B (AdultF) and her wife H (AdultF, he/him). I just kinda. Do whatever all day? So I'd watch reality tv, since shows like that were and still are HUGE in our world. Thing is, they're all the exact same! And you know what it means when shows are the exact same? They're BORING. I thought it was awful, since again, the reality show scene was big. They should've been actually good!

B gave me this book about some sort of game. Death game. And I thought it was SOOO good. Better than sweets, and I LOVE sweets! I suddenly had a brilliant idea after finishing it and seeing the reality shows again: What if I made a show exactly like the game in the book?

B was rich, so I kinda just borrowed her money, got equipment for the show, and pitched it. I know no sane people would want to be in something like this, so I had to make the prize... Enticing. Thankfully, there was something just perfect... A recovery center! Resurrection machine, basically! Freshly invented, so they are in no ways perfect, but the demand for them was real. The price it would fetch would entice basically anyone regardless! I basically got one for free since it came with every show, and I took the opportunity right away.

30 people signed up. None of them (except for one guy, M (AdultNB) was of sound mind, I could tell, but I knew to expect that. Hell, it made it even more fun! So I started the game, and things went very well! I had to do a few things to keep it from criticism, but don't worry about that its not like i broke the prize or anything hahahahahaha

Many of them were catching onto the fact that I never like, specified what happens if they lost, unfortunately. I had to dispose of some of them because they got too close... But no matter, they made for good meals!

I really wanted it to finish. I really did. But they figured it out. They fought against me. I could take them solo or duo, but... It was 5 against 1! Unfair, if you'd ask me!

Now I'm in jail, and the worst thing has happened: B has turned against me! I really need to ask, AITA?

[tobiasdrake]

It was a relaxing vacation but it's time to refocus on what's important.

No more excuses PLAY ME

I'm going to destroy you like the scrub you are

Oh my god, your pieces are custom painted. I love that. I wish mine were painted.

...wait, can I paint them? Have I been missing out on painting my pieces this whole time?

HAHAHAHAHAHA I AM THE BEST AT TINY WARRIOR FIGURINES

...

...

...

What the actual fuck am I doing? Don't I have a... an entire atmosphere to try and repair....

shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit I BLAME YOU YOLANDE YOU PAID ME IN GAMBLING ADDICTION shit shit shit shit

I'M HERE IT'S FINE EVERYTHING'S FINE

I'm not late. All-a y'all are early. The meeting was scheduled for whenever I get there. I'm here now, I'm focused, we can get to work.

Hey Serai, am I hungry enough for Wall Sashimi? I'm thinking... maybe just a Wall Parfait for a light snack.

Still don't see why I have to give the wall money. What does it even buy with it? It's a wall.

*sigh* You know what, you're right. That's really more of a question for Zale. HEY ZALE, HOW HUNGRY AM I?

Ugh, this is taking forever. I'm bored. Come on, Zale, let's take Kickball and--

...

Did. Uh. Did we....

Did we just. Leave Kickball at Clockwork Castle? I think we all kind of forgot about Kickball in the Artificer commotion.

Wow, it's a good thing none of us promised them anything.

I did want to make something rain there but this is good enough. As long as we're accomplishing something, I can be satisfied with only a mild amount of spite.

Good for you! I still feel like shit.

Job's only half-finished, and the important half is yet to come. Also, the hard part, given that I'm fairly certain the Dweller of Dread is guarding my moon.

Still coming to terms with the fact that we may need to slay a Dweller in order to restore the Eclipse and give us the power to slay a Dweller. There's a pretty significant complication there.

Go ahead and take this victory lap, little frog robo. We couldn't have done it without you.

Also, the way Serai manages to smile with just her eyes is awesome.

I'm not 100% sure that simply shining sunlight directly onto the moon counts as an Eclipse but I sort of feel like it does and that's good enough. Let's go cleansing.

Probably wasn't expecting visitors on this dead world.

Then again, we did just shine sunlight directly on its lair for the first time in centuries so it probably knew something was about to go down.

GUESS WE'RE DOING THIS

Remember, the more limbs we dismember now, the less we'll have to deal with later.

Just like that. We're making calamari, people.

Teach them to interfere with a peaceful protest. We're here to FREE LUNA and we aren't leaving until our demands our met!

Give. Me. Back. My. Goddamn. MOON.

...or else we'll bring the sun to you.

Sometimes you just need to get creative. There is not technically a term for when the sun is between the moon and earth. Because that's not a thing. But that just means I get to name it.

This is a Zalian Eclipse. What do you have to say about that, huh!?

Okay, that's fair. I walked right into that.

Hold up, what's happening now? Is this... are we....

I. Guess. This answers my question of whether the Fuck Out Of My Head Juice is still in effect. This is concerning. Do I... should I....

...wait a second, that's not ZALE!

Zale's sword is red. I was thinking about how pretty it looks the other day when we were fighting bird people. *smug*

Okay, I'm officially done with this weirdass shit.

IN THE NAME OF THE MOON

I'LL PUNISH YOU

[accio-victuuri]

sharing this new fake rumor posted over at zsww fake house. it’s a pretty long one ✌🏼going by the conversations, i think the intent here is to supplement their alleged meet up recently. usual disclaimer, this is not real. treat as fan fiction. there are some unnecessary bits omitted but very minimal. just so it wouldn’t be a full translation.

XZ: Don’t worry, I haven’t downloaded it yet.

XZ: Yeah, I know

XZ: I said it

XZ: Well, then I’ll start here.

XZ: Try to be early

XZ: 🫵🏻 Watch for some time

staff: Don’t worry

It has been arranged, but it is not necessary, but there is a sense of ceremony, so I went to prepare it.

people interpret this as XZ watching WoF! i’m cackling cause he is asking the staff to watch it too when he is not looking. reminds me of that other rumor that WYB does the same. he asks staff to watch and then they will tell him what happened if he is too busy to. and he is saying to wyb to come early, maybe he wants to watch it together!

XZ: Don’t move, just lie down.

WYB: It’s okay

WYB: I fell asleep in the car for a while

XZ: Are your legs sore?

WYB: Not bad

WYB: Why do you look at me like that?

XZ: What do you think?

WYB: ☺️ 😏😏😏

XZ: Virtue

WYB: 😀😀

WYB: It's okay. Look. Okay.

WYB: It’s starting to itch a little bit

XZ: Don’t buckle

as for the “virtue” term i looked it up on baidu and it seems like this is used more on the reason of telling WYB off cause what he is thinking is 😏😏.

the itching is probably the wound he has on his hand that is drying up now. and how xz is so concerned for wyb! AHHHHHHH!

XZ: I told you before that you wouldn’t listen.

XZ: It’s quite obvious on TV that there’s a trap.

WYB: Where did you see it?

XZ: Watch the clips. I want to watch them all. Where can I find the time?

WYB: Oh

WYB: You still have time to rest more, ge

WYB: You must be tired, ge 🥺

(….)

XZ: Don’t force me into happy moments……

WYB: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

watching WoF clips! Hahahahahaha! I find it really cute how they support each other

WYB: What are you having for dinner?

XZ: Please hurry up, please

this next part is mostly WYB being clowned by staff and his continued refusal to make vlogs 🤪 and him not approving an increase in budget! here is a bit:

Staff 2: 😂😂😂😂

Staff 3: You don’t need to provide us with a vlog

WYB: That saves money

Staff 4: Then my budget has increased

WYB: Not approved

Staff 4: 😂

XZ: Mr. Wei has spoken. You must listen.

WYB: I’ll give you some for yourselves.

XZ: Are Mr. Wei’s rights limited to this much?

WYB: It’s up to you whether it’s you or not

XZ: 😅

XZ: Do you think I’ve treated you badly?

WYB: Just kidding, didn’t you click on all of them?

mister wei 🥺🥺🥺 why do i have a feeling that XZ’s favorite right now is Wei Ruolai?

XZ: He doesn’t have many opportunities, so use them and cherish them.

Staff 4: Finished. Here.

WYB: Oh, can you finish it?

WYB: Who do you belong to?

XZ: Report to you

WYB: Huh?

XZ: Repay...the real reward📱take it and repay it

WYB: Then I can take it apart and buy it....

XZ: Then buy it yourself

WYB: You buy it for me...what you just said

XZ: I didn’t say

XZ: OK OK OK

XZ: Aren’t they all in your hands? Buy it yourself.

WYB: Don’t worry if I buy a lot at once

XZ: Scared. I’m so scared.

WYB: I bought just one

WYB: ☺️

XZ: 👍🏻

this is confusing me but what i can gather is wyb bought something! what is it? 👀

Isn't it just for us all to hear you whispering, coaxing, and speaking so loudly? Come on, eat, the meal is here, if you don't eat, you'll be full first.

P.S: The boss doesn’t know that he blinks when he’s trying to coax people.

i love this last part cause OP is sort of complaining about the two lovebirds! as usual, having their own world. and idk who the “boss” is that blinks, or maybe he is trying to be cute by slow-blinking? i have a feeling it’s xz tho 😂😂😂😂

-END.

[liliallowed]

I'm surprised Y/N didn't ask how the Player got caught by Dust in the first place, maybe we should ask?

this takes place before the reset lending btw

"how did he capture you? I was confused for a moment... he grabbed my soul, let go and then... just... told me to leave?"

"oh wait wait wait... he let you LEAVE? after taking me from you? and you STILL came down here? wow what a gentleman. I didn't know he had mercy left in him."

"what do YOU MEAN TAKE YOU FROM ME!?"

"oh yeah... I forgot to mention I've been hanging out in your soul and possessing your body for like... five days. cuz I was jealous if all the attention he was giving you"

"he KIDNAPPED me! YOU'RE JEALOUS OF BEING KIDNA- wait, possession? SO HE WAS TELLING THE TRUTH!? but... I didn't FEEL possessed!"

"that's cuz I made sure to act like you silly~ so our wills were synced up until you decided to STAY instead of leaving. honestly? I didn't expect YOU to want to stay."

"I wanted to see if there were more people he kidnapped! I couldn't just stand by!"

"you clearly don't value your own life when the shady serial killer gives you an out. glad to know me and him are not the only one with loose screws."

"you don't GET TO COMPARE ME TO yourself."

"I don't? you're clearly head over heels for him you simp. I'd say I share that sentiment buuuut with a murderous subtext."

"it's not like that... he... he could have done much worse... could have killed or tortured me, stolen all my money or..."

"oh you're still in shock and in a coping mechanism. trying to justify his act. youre not in love you're SCARED aren't you? your mind is trying to calm you down by twisting logic. wait till you watch him slice off his own brothers head like it's butter HAHAHAHAHAHA! I wonder if you'll still find a way to justify it!"

"you're... you're a fucking psycho."

"of course I am! though I'll let you know not all psychopaths are like this and the social stigma around them is bullshit."

"that- no I didn't mean that you're mentally- THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT! YOU'RE FUCKING EVIL! "

"damn right I am. impressed? I can show you SOO MUCH WORSE HUN you better lower your expectations from me and him. because from the looks of it? he only use you to get back at me and capture me."

"... I... he said it was to protect-"

"awww did he tell you you're SPECIAL? that he likes you? that you make his soul flutter in his chest? what a gasslighting asshole~ I did learn from the best hehehe. besides! even if he actually likes you, are you really planning on being his PET or exp storage?"

"wh-what!?"

"he's going to kill you if you stay with himmmm. make you a part of him in his LV~ I can show you if you like! in fact, go ahead and let him trap me again. live your lovey dovey life but when he KILLS you? you'll know I wasn't lying."

"he WOULDN'T."

"hm? you say as if you know him better than me. why are you so sure? because he pet you go once?"

"I don't know what history you two have but I don't plan on dying to him."

"oh? alright! let's see if you can keep that spirit up"

[mbrainspaz]

Whenever I dare to complain about anything work-related all the conservatives and boomers in my life (too many) pop up like springtime weeds to call me a lazy hippie.

That ain’t it.

Sure I've dared to take a little nap in a hammock now and then (the scandal!), but I’ve worked anywhere from 2-6 jobs simultaneously for the last 5 years. Even when I started out on the corporate side almost 10 years ago I had side hustles. Not even for the money, back then. I just wanted to be able to do work for me, not them. Anyway here I am being the poster child of bootstraps individualist hustle culture entrepreneurship but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. If I could find another place to live while working less I'd hit the bricks tomorrow and try my luck. It's all the same to me. I'm barely surviving no matter what I do.

Why should I want to work to make any of these boutique coffee shop suits richer while they’re working to keep me down? They've shown me over and over again that I'm worth less than the dirt they move to build their mansions. Through the lens of their finances my whole life is a battery to be drained and thrown away.

That's one reason I like my current main job even though it is technically corporate servitude. At least it's a money pit. They sink money into what I do and get absolutely nothing back. The suits are always crying, sobbing, seething about how we barely break even. It's so satisfying. Yes. You put money into horses and they produce metric tons of shit that you get to pay people to remove.

Hah! hahahahahaha

[waiting-on-a-dream]

𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐫 (𝐈𝐰𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐨 𝐃𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐞'𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝟑 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐚)

Haruto: Are you okay, Daisuke-kun?

Daisuke: Not really.

Haruto: ..That was a stupid question. So you only have one victim?

Daisuke: That's right.

Haruto: Your answers to previous interrogation questions makes it seem like it wasn't an accident.

Daisuke: No, it wasn't an accident. It was definitely...murder.

Haruto: Hm. My working theory right now is that you killed a client that couldn't pay up. Something like that. But it doesn't really make sense because of your motive and body count.

Daisuke: What exactly did you see in my music video? My crime can't be that hard to solve.

Haruto: No concrete evidence for your murder. I don't even know who your victim is.

Daisuke: Hah.

Haruto: Help me out here.

Daisuke: If you had voted me innocent, you would have been able to know who my victim is.

Haruto: Seriously? You were the one who wanted to be voted guilty.

Daisuke: I changed my mind. Too bad you can't.

Haruto: *Grumbles* This can't be the consequences of my actions. Well, what was your motive then?

Daisuke: Boss' orders.

Haruto: Like, assassination?

Daisuke: Something like that.

Haruto: Shit. You don't usually do things like that, right?

Daisuke: Nope, I'm just a humble drug dealer. I didn't even receive training for it.

Haruto: Then why did they send you?

Daisuke: Because he wouldn't try and run if it was me.

Haruto: Who's your victim again?

Daisuke: I'm sure my music video will reveal who it is this time.

Haruto: Okay... Can you tell me more about him?

Daisuke: He was a traitor to the mafia.

Haruto: Oh. You guys were close?

Daisuke: He took an overseas mission and disappeared. Took some money from us too, but at least he finished the job.

Haruto: That's not what I asked.

Daisuke: I thought we were. But it turns out I didn't know him at all.

Haruto: I think I have an idea on who your victim is now.

Daisuke: Heh. Good for you. Not that you care as long as you can do your job, right? I thought the same way too. That after I got through my mission, everything would be okay.

Haruto: Wasn't it?

Daisuke: Of course not.

Haruto: Why not?

Daisuke: BECAUSE I KILLED HIM AND I'VE NEVER KILLED ANYONE BEFORE THAT!

Haruto: Sure, people often struggle with psychological trauma after taking a life. But I suspect your current stress is because of who your victim is instead of the act of murdering itself.

Daisuke: What is your problem? *Hysterical laugh* Are you a psychopath or something?

Haruto: Ah, don't be like that. I'm just trying to find out the truth.

[Bell rings, mechanical sounds in the back.]

Daisuke: Ahaha... Hahahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Haruto: Prisoner 003, use your voice for something more productive and sing your sins!

[MV description - BANG BANG]

The song features more guitar and drumming compared to Daisuke's previous songs. Two dramatic beats mark the transition in between lyrics. The sounds are more akin to gunshots than drumming.

"So here's the situation. You know I'm more of a negotiator, I didn't want it to come to this."

The MV starts with Daisuke picking the lock to the front door of an apartment. The camera cuts to Ryuto walking up to the same door and unlocking it. He opens the door and steps into the apartment. Daisuke sneaks up behind him, gun to his back. A closeup of Ryuto's face, lidded eyes turned downward, expression impassive.

"The hole within me that I thought was filled. Turns out it was just forgotten for a while. But aren't the two basically the same? You were a good fix, my favourite drug."

A catchy bass beat becomes the focus of the song. Daisuke and Ryuto are in what looks like a club. Ryuto looks around with a slight furrow in his brow, uncomfortable, out of place. Daisuke laughs, dragging him onto the dance floor, trying to get him to dance. The crowd around them jumps and sways. Flashing lights. Glinting jewelry. Their hands, still intertwined. A frame of them dancing side by side. It glitches in split seconds, neon green background and chains around their necks.

"With a bang, bang! I've found you. Since I'm already here, how about I catch you up to speed? You have no idea what you missed."

A phone rings and Daisuke picks it up, putting it to his ear. His eyes widen, head jerking back in surprise. The woman from Catching up hits a man standing by her table in a fit of rage. Daisuke sits on the red leather couch not too far, looking sorrowfully on the ground. Yuta in prison garbs. The back of Ryuto's head, walking away.

"Admit it. You knew this would happen. A life of serenity doesn't exist for trash like us. Look who's the idiot, idiot, for trying to run."

"If you're going to kill me, get it over with already." Sitting almost relaxed, Ryuto doesn't look impressed.

Daisuke's face scrunches a little, eyebrows furrowing. He grits his teeth. Gun under the table. He pulls the trigger.

"With a bang, bang! I've found you. Did you think I wouldn't do it? I'm just following orders here. There's no one to blame but yourself~"

The woman picks up a photo of Ryuto on the streets. She frowns. Daisuke walks up to her, eyes glowing a neon orange. She stares at him for a moment, then reaches into a drawer underneath her desk and hands him a gun. He takes the photo and leaves the room.

"The hole within me that I thought was filled. Turns out it was just forgotten for a while. I think I would have gone with you if you had asked. But the thought of you not wanting me hurts a lot."

Daisuke grins maniacally, jumping out of his seat to grab Ryuto's collar, leaning in close. The bleeding wound in Ryuto's gut, soaking through his shirt. A closeup of Daisuke's face as he laughs and laughs. The scene rewinds a few seconds. He's crying this time, distraught. A tear lands on Ryuto's face. He stares up at Daisuke as if in a daze.

"Admit it. You knew this would happen. There was no escaping. Consequences upon consequences. Look who's the idiot, idiot, for lying to himself."

Ryuto reaches up with a bloody hand to cup Daisuke's cheek, pulling his face closer. The screen glitches. End.

┊ ⇄ ◁◁ II ▷▷ ↻ ┊

[fantasticenthusiasttale]

A drabble what lives in my head for months with free rent (before s1)

《》《》《》

The morning was hectic for Scrooge. After wake up and eat the breakfast, Launchpad came to talk with him before the usually time he does. The lad was happy as always, but his boss noticed him a little scared with something.

"Mr. McDee... Good morning!" Launchpad greeted Scrooge with a smile, what his boss doesn't reciprocate.

Scrooge snort. "What happened this time, Launchpad?" and the lad showed him a scared look.

"Well, I... I think you can't use your car today, Mr. McDee. I crashed its in the garage today earlier."

"What?! Again?!" Scrooge got up fastily from his chair "How you crashed a car into the garage? And how I'm going to job today?"

Launchpad stopped to think. "You can go with me in the bike, it'll be a little later but you'll be there."

"No, I'm not doing this again, you crashed the bike in the last time!"

"But I fixed its!"

"No, I'm walking today."

"Are you sure, Mr. McDee?"

"Yes, and you'll stay here to fix the car so I can return to house later in the limousine!" Scrooge ordered, and Launchpad went to do what he told, leaving him alone.

《》《》《》

Go walking to the work is not that bad, it's just so far from the mansion. Well, at least it's good don't having to pay the gasoline and to the legs's health, if he can walk he isn't wasting money in a bus passage or a cab. He can do this with no waste of money.

"Hahahahaha!" Scrooge heard a loud and familiar laugh in the streets. He looked back, the right and the left and doesn't found anyone laughing or even smiling, so he thinked he was hearing things and continued to walk.

"Hahahaha!" The laugh again, maybe someone was thinking is funny the richest duck in the world going to the job walking, and he is ready to turn angry with that person. But, again, he doesn't found anyone laughing around him.

"Haha!" The third laugh he found where them are from, an asylum for old people in that same street. He went close to the asylum's window to hear who was laughing.

"Hahahahahaha! You're so funny, James! I love your jokes!"

"Thank you, Donald, I do my best to make the people happy."

Scrooge froze. What did he heard?? No, it can't be, it can't be--

And there he was. His nephew, Donald, with some bandages and dressed with a light blue swetear was sit in a bed laughing loudily with the jokes the other man was telling. The man, completely dressed with white and details in light colors, was taking his blood pressure and talking with him.

"Your blood pressure is fine as always, Donald. Go eat the breakfast and when you finish, come back here to change the bandages."

"Alright, James!" Donald happily left the room after the man and closed the door.

Out the room, Scrooge was shocked. He wants to scream, enter in the asylum and take his nephew back to the mansion, but he can't. There is something so wrong. Scrooge never wondered see him in a place like that.

"Donald..." it was everything he could say at this moment, it's all his fault, he should searched about him since he got out the mansion with the eggs, he must did it!

Forget the damn work, the damn meetings he should have today, he have to search that story deep down now!