#t’s different when his best boy friend is involved

[gaypeople]

jacob is so funny for this. “his focus was on work” until sam got on set and they had routine dinner dates where they ate the same thing every single time.….much to think about

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗜𝗧'𝗦 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗗

　　　　　　　　　𝒄𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: Where Y/N is part of the Sturniolo Triplets fandom and makes videos about them on TikTok. After years of creating content, one of her videos seems to catch the attention of none other than Chris.

WARNING: None.

REQUESTED?: Yes, from anon.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

A/N².: I used this tiktoker as an inspiration for the content that the reader creates on this.

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

It was true that the Sturniolo Triplets fandom grew so much in such a short time thanks to the fans themselves, who play a big role in bringing the channel to other people through social media - mainly TikTok. It was also true that, at least 90% of this part of the fandom works with edits of different types of the boys; compilation of parts from a certain video or podcast, edits and even memes.

But there was a small portion that made videos talking about the boys, showing their faces and voices while explaining their content, work and even giving tips on how the triplets themselves could increase their audience or improve their brands.

And Y/N was part of this small portion, having been in the fandom since mid-2021 and not missing any videos of the triplets, she could talk about them for hours on end.

Her biggest hobby was making videos giving ideas for their channel and brands: some brands they could collab with, theme ideas for car videos, topics for podcasts, prints for hoodie sets and t-shirts - both for the triplets' brand and for Fresh Love -, different flavors and themes for Space Camp, and so on.

The girl applied all her love and knowledge to all her videos, editing the backgrounds and explaining her ideas with the smallest details, making them understandable. She had perfect lighting, audio, and set equipment for her work, which made the quality equally good as her content.

Her trademark was her strawberry frappuccino, which she was always drinking every time she turned on her phone camera. Fans joked that her obsession with the drink was like Chris's obsession with Pepsi.

And all that was exactly why fans loved her so much. Y/N had more than 400 thousand followers on her TikTok account and all her videos reached an average of 150 thousand likes, in addition to the many comments saying how smart she was for having those ideas, her kindness in sharing them with the public and even complementing her beauty.

The girl spent hours of her day reading each one of them and interacting with fans as if they were best friends, always being very kind. She laughed her ass off at the comments from people who madly tagged the boys, especially Chris, as it was a well-known fact that he was her favorite - she loved to make that very clear.

Some fans even went so far as to say that if Chris was ever ready to get romantically involved with someone again, they wanted it to be with Y/N. The girl read that type of comment with a huge smile on her face and red cheeks, feeling honored. Although she imagined that the boys would never even notice her, she allowed herself to travel through the world of delusion from time to time.

So it was an understandment to say that she was super surprised when, after waking up on a typical Saturday and picking up her phone for the first time in the day before even getting out of bed - a bad habit of hers -, she saw the notifications in triple the volume of its normal.

She felt dizzy with so much information, trying to find in the midst of so many comments and messages what was really happening.

Finally, after traveling between her TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter for long minutes, she finally found it.

Chris Sturniolo had commented on her last video.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

It was Friday, and the triplets had just returned home after finishing recording their new car video that would be posted in a few hours.

Chris was currently lying in his bed, the lights in his room dimmed, and the low noise coming from his phone filling the four walls.

The brunette was just getting ready to take a shower minutes ago, having opened his TikTok and scrolling through his For You for a few minutes, about to take off his clothes used in the filming, when a video of an unknown girl talking about himself caught his attention.

It was very normal to have videos of and about himself on his For You, after all, the hours over the last few years that he spent liking one video or another showed the algorithm that he liked this type of content. Edits and memes of him alone or with his brothers filled his app, and he spent enough time watching, laughing, liking, and, sometimes, reposting some of them.

But it wasn't normal for him to have a completely unknown person talking directly about him, with her face and voice exposed for the world while doing it. And what surprised him most was what she was talking about, that specific video being about different prints and colors that he could use in the next Fresh Love collection.

His blue eyes lingered too long on the girl's face, admiring her features, her sweet voice serving as a melody for his ears.

When Chris dragged his thumb from the right to the left of his screen, entering the girl's profile, he finally noticed her name.

"Y/N." His voice came out in a whisper, enjoying more than necessary how the name slipped off his tongue so easily.

His fingers wandered across the screen, going from one video to another, listening to the ideas carefully - even writing some down on his Notes app -, saving some in a separate folder and browsing the comments, only then realizing that practically all of them were from fans tagging him.

Laughter escaped his lips at some of the jokes the girl made every now and then, while fascination filled his eyes with the effort she put into each idea.

The sound of knocking against his bedroom door startled him, his body jumping as he turned sharply towards the source of it, Matt's head appearing between his door and the frame, his eyebrows furrowed as his eyes traveled around the room briefly.

"You've been listening to this girl for so many hours that I thought she was here with you." Matt commented, opening the door wider and approaching Chris.

The youngest of the triplets rolled his eyes, suppressing the urge to lock his phone screen and keep Y/N all to himself, but she was well known in the fandom and her videos were about him and his brothers, the possibility of her content getting to them as quickly as it got to him was huge.

"It's a girl who appeared on my For You today. She makes videos of ideas for our channel and brands, can you believe it?" Chris looked at Matt as he showed his phone screen with Y/N's profile open. His eyes were wide with fascination, and his lips stretched into an enthusiastic smile.

Matt observed him for a few seconds, noticing his body language and the way he spoke about the girl, it was different from all the other times the boy commented about tiktokers or videos others made about them.

"Send me a video of her, I'll take a look later. Now go upstairs, I bought us something to eat."

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Another Monday had arrived, and Y/N was looking for strength in her body to get out of bed and face another start of the week.

The thought that in a few hours, she would have a brand new Sturniolo Triplets podcast was what made her tackle her tasks.

Her eyes traveled to the time on her phone and to her notification bar every 10 minutes, as if she was expecting Nick to release the podcast earlier than usual - it was obvious that that wasn't going to happen.

After last Saturday, where she had woken up to a comment from none other than Christopher Sturniolo, her weekend was complete madness.

She spent hours staring at the little comment as her mind tried to process whether she was actually awake or still asleep and in a very good dream.

"loved the idea! it's noted ;)"

"it's noted"? What did that even mean? Did he actually write down her idea for future use? Should she be prepared to wake up some other day and see that he has launched a new collection with something she suggested in one of her videos?

And what made her go crazy the most was that Chris Sturniolo had seen her face, and not only that, he found her attractive enough and her idea creative enough to watch it until the end.

She spent almost the entire previous two days waiting for him to comment again, or even like one of her videos, but that didn't happen. Instead, Y/N received thousands of comments from fans going crazy with her about what happened. At least she had a good laugh with them.

Now, she was in her bedroom, the light from the movie playing on the TV was the only source of illumination. Y/N was lying in her bed, already in her pajamas and with her pre-bed cup of cappuccino on her lap, keeping her legs warm, her eyes on the television, but her mind somewhere else.

The sound of the YouTube notification came from her phone and Y/N had never moved so quickly, her hand taking the device out of her bedside table and unlocking the screen while muting the television, clicking on it with her thumb without even looking at the other notifications.

Her fingers worked on increasing the volume and screen brightness, setting it to the best resolution and getting comfortable on her bed, preparing to stay in that position for the next hour.

The podcast was already at minute 35, and Y/N felt her cheeks hurting from how much she was laughing at the topics brought up by the boys. Nick was especially funny that day, making Chris and Matt laugh at every moment.

In addition to the senseless fights that would arise between the three of them out of nowhere, which made Y/N roll her eyes playfully, already accustomed to their way with each other.

Until her big smile was replaced by an expression of a mixture of fright and surprise.

"Can we take a moment to talk about the intense crush Chris developed this weekend?" Nick interrupted Matt's laughter, taking a sip of his Doctor Pepper.

Chris turned abruptly to his brother, his eyes wide at the comment as he shook his head, almost begging through telepathy for him not to talk about that.

"It's true, Chris spent the weekend obsessing over a fan of ours who makes videos on TikTok with different ideas for our channel." Matt agreed, looking briefly at Nick while his hands moved the microphone support, pressing his lips together as he tried to suppress his laughter at Chris's reaction.

"Yeah, she is super pretty, and her ideas are very interesting. I think I only saw her profile once, but I listened to all her videos through Chris's phone." Nick continued, raising his right hand and directing his palm towards Chris, pretending to cover his figure with it and ignoring his desperate expression. "He literally spent the entire weekend watching her."

"Her name is Y/N. Search for her guys. We might even use one of her ideas on our next podcast." Matt added, his voice coming out low despite his mouth being almost glued to the microphone.

"You guys are horrible, I hate you." Despite the distance, the camera lens that focused on Chris's image captured his red cheeks as he tried to suppress a smile at the thought of the girl who took over his thoughts, rolling his eyes to his brothers.

"Now he will be silent for the next 10 minutes." Nick continued, amusement in his voice as he picked up his Space Camp watermelon lip balm, playing with the object in his hands.

"He's in love Nick, give him some credit." Matt mocked alongside the oldest triplet, a small smile on his face as his eyes watched his brother's reaction.

"Okay, next topic." Chris interrupted loudly, his voice cracking with embarrassment. He raised his arms and moved them from side to side exasperatedly, earning laughter from the other two, before Nick briefly passed his eyes on the document open on his laptop, starting the next topic.

"Oh my God." Y/N whispered, clicking once on the screen and dragging the small ball in the bottom bar to the left, going back a few minutes of the podcast and rewatching that specific part.

The girl repeated that action at least three more times, her brain still processing that Chris Sturniolo had been watching her TikToks all weekend - as if she were some kind of famous artist - and that, apparently, he was developing a mini crush on her as well.

Her heart was beating too fast to be normal as her cheeks burned, a red tinge taking over her skin. Goosebumps ran through her body as her fingers trembled slightly. Her jaw was already hurting from the time she held her mouth open, but no sound escaped from it.

A notification suddenly appearing at the top of the screen caught her eye, her right hand instantly flying to her mouth while her left hand lowered her phone, resting the device on her mattress.

Her eyes were now fixed on the wall in front of her bed, as her mind screamed at herself.

christopherturniolo sent you a direct message.

"hey!"

[mastermindmiko]

hi,

i’m currently in my bill weasley phase aha

i was wondering if i could have gut wrenching angst and maybe fluff i need something to just cause pain aha

it’s okay if not :)

Hey, I know this is very long overdue but it's finally here! You asked for angst, and angst you shall receive. I hope I did it justice. More (Bill Weasley Fanfiction)

content warnings: none I believe, but lmk, kissing maybe? not edited Pairing: Bill Weasley + fem!reader word count: 9201 (sorta got carried away) Summary: You and Bill were always friends, until there was something more.

a/n: Trying my best to finish all the requests I've got and simply just posting more. Also, I tried this little thing were I did a sort of rhyming (don't want to call it poetry cause that's too big a compliment) to start off the ff, you can sort of see it like a summary maybe too.

It all starts out the same way, with a girl and a boy that meet when they were small then grow until they’re tall. They grasp each other's hands, holding their stance as their friendship solidifies until there’s a shift, a switch, a fully expected change that takes things from where they were to where they are now. 

There were only ever a few things that I cared about; My family, my friends, my future and my Bill. He never fit into neither the first nor the second categories as it was simply just different with him. Living only a few kilometres away from the Weasleys ensured that I spent most of my time with him, and as we both went to Hogwarts it only made me want to sew him to my side even more. 

“Hey, why do the Weasleys call you Honey?” 

“Ummm, it involves an incident where I ended up being a large tub of honey.” I explain as vaguely as I can, still trying to erase the embarrassing story out of my head. Tonks looks at me weirdly before waving her hand, “I don’t even want to know.”

I spent ten years of my life being Bill’s friend, best friend even, watching as his family got bigger and so did he. He developed his interests and I developed mine when all I thought of him was a friend, and none of that changed until-

“Do you think Bill’s hot?” 

Nymphadora- Tonks asked me one day. I look up from my lunch and ask her, “What?” 

“You know Bill- you’re friend, tall, ginger-” 

“I know who Bill is…” I trail off, and I think of what she just asked, now that we were fifteen (practically adults), everyone started falling for people left and right, while I just focused on Quidditch and OWLs. Bill was doing the same as me, we would study together, practise together, there just wasn’t enough time building a future and also doing normal typical teenager stuff. 

“You gotta admit, he’s gotten mighty fit over the summer.” Tonks said, and I looked at the girl who’s two years younger than me disapprovingly. Despite being in different years and houses, we shared the same lunch period. I scold, “Aren’t you a bit too young to be thinking of things like that?” 

“I just call it like I see it.” She replies, and then eyes me up and down with a grin on her face. I blush and push her shoulder. She laughs and I smile a bit myself. There’s a beat then she asks again, “You didn’t answer my question…do you think that Bill’s hot?” 

I look around trying to recall in my memory the most accurate picture of Bill I could conjure up. He’s definitely gotten taller. I remember how I used to be able to ruffle his hair without having to step on my tiptoes- and his hair’s gotten longer, much to Molly’s disapproval. He’s gotten a bit more tan from spending all that time out in the sun, making his freckles more apparent. 

All that time in the sun playing quidditch also changed his physique a bit. His shoulders are broader, his biceps and thighs thicker. Hands are larger and stronger. I recall the last game of the summer, only a few weeks ago, where every member of the Weasley family was playing, Ginny being the referee as she was still very small. I was the beater, as always. Bill was the chaser, and we were on opposite teams. Halfway through the game, two hours in, we were still playing and Bill decided to throw some water over his head, cooling him off. The water soaking his hair, arms and shirt, making it cling to his body-

“You totally think he is!” Tonks exclaims, and brings me out of my daydream. I feel my face flare up and I stutter as I defend myself, “It’s not that, it’s just yes, he’s fit but he’s my friend, so he’s just that, he’s just fit.” 

Tonks is still giving me that cheeky grin when I decide that that’s enough of that interaction, so I stand up, deciding to just stay in class for the next fifteen minutes till class starts. I say, “Well, I gotta go. Bye Tonks.” 

She shakes her head, and waves while I headout of the Great Hall. I pull out a piece of paper from my bag as I look at my schedule, I turn around to move the other way, when I see Potions scrawled up on the parchment. I shiver as I enter the dungeons and hope that Professor Snape doesn’t mind me waiting till class begins, I could prep the cauldron while I wait. 

I walk through the dark silent hallways, hearing the echoes of each step I take. A large hand encompasses my shoulder, and I turn around quickly lifting my wand from my waist band. I point my wand to the face of my attacker and I meet with the grinning face of Bill Weasley. I relax as Bill takes the wand out of my hand and places it inside my belt loop, a normal occurrence, if it weren’t for the fact that his face is close to mine and I notice just how sharp and angular it is. 

“Tonks told me you were heading to class, what are you doing going to potions this early? Snape barely tolerates Gryffindor’s when he has to.” Bill says, and push his hand off my shoulder, and he chuckles. I say, “Snape actually likes me, and don’t act like that when you're practically his favourite.” 

“It’s only cause I’m the best.” He grin, cockily, and he taps his head, pointing towards his brain. I push his shoulder playfully and reply, “Second best.” 

***

The Gryffindor common room fills with the sounds of both Muggle and wizard music. The smell of alcohol and sweat from the mixing bodies encases the area. A muggle born brought a machine that flickers light in different hues of different colours, having the lights bounce off the walls, as people dance in the centre of the room, and the chatter fills. 

I’m standing against some wall, holding a cup of butterbeer that was gathered from an illegal trip to Hogsmeade only a few hours ago after the win for the house. I never did drink much alcohol and especially not during Quidditch season. This was the first year I’ve been able to participate in the parties that Gryffindor house threw, and it was exciting, but much more boring than I expected. 

I’m watching the room, looking around, seeing a young Percy trying to make his way up to the boy’s dormitories as swiftly as he could while carrying two books that are twice the size of his head. Some drunk seventh years, push him, unintentionally, Percy glares at them nonetheless. I move towards him, pushing away the couples that might as well just get a room. I fling my arm around Percy’s shoulder, nod my head towards the stairs. I carry one of the books from him and we walk towards the dormitories. 

He rushes up the stairs as fast as he can as soon as he’s out of the sea of bodies. I call out his name, and despite the loud music, he turns to me, guiltily. I say, “We’ve told you a million times that you can’t stay out this loud, especially after curfew, even if it is to study.” 

“I know, I know…you won’t tell Bill?” Percy asks, lips pursed and ashamed. I sigh and give him the other book back and reply, “Not if you don’t do it again.” 

He grins from ear to ear, large glasses slipping off his nose. He laughs, “Thank you, Honey!” He wastes no second before running up the stairs once again, and I can just barely hear the sounds of the footsteps fade away before I walk away. 

I drink the last bit of the butterbeer in my cup. I go to the opposite side of the room, grimacing as people shove me around. I stand by the drinks table and start to look around for the butterbeer bowl, when I notice a mop of red hair, reaching for the firewhiskey. I shake my head and sneak up behind the unsuspecting Weasley. I reach forward and grab a handful of his hair, and pull him back. 

“Ow! Ow! Ow!” Charlie chants, while I pull him by his hair. His hands lift up and try to loosen the grip that my fingers had on his hair. I threaten, “Put the cup down.” 

He frowns but (reluctantly) puts it down. I pull him by his hair once again and push him towards, once again the stairs of the dormitories. The place is quieter there, and I can scold him properly. We reach near the top of the first year boy’s dormitories, and I leave his hair. He rubs his head, and looks at me with a frown.

“What in Merlin’s name did you think you were doing?”  I say, while placing a soft (sort of) slap on the back of his head. He swats my hand away after, and continues to rub his head. He pouts, “Stop ruining my best feature.” 

“No, your best feature is your Quidditch skills, not your stupid hair that needs to be cut.” I scold, and look at him, disappointed. I continue, “What did you think you were during? Trying to drink Firewhiskey of all things!” 

A drunk seventh year passes us and shouts, “Yeah little Weesilie, you should try something lighter for your first time.” 

“Bugger off!” I shout at him, and I turn back to Charlie. I rant, “There’s a reason why people below fifth year aren’t allowed to be at parties and being at parties includes alcohol, so until a few more years, you’re not allowed to have any-” 

“A few more years! I’m fourteen as soon as I hit that big 15 like you and Bill, I’m gonna have some.” Charlie says, and he complains, “All my friends have some, and so do you and Bill, why can’t I? It’s just one year.” 

“A year is a long time, Charlie, and so what if all your friends are doing bad things, doesn’t mean you should to, besides Bill and I don’t even like to drink. Even when you turn 15, you’re not going to be able to drink a lot because you’re a seeker, Charlie!” I reply, and he huffs and folds his arms together. 

“That still doesn’t mean that I won’t try it.” Charlie pouts, and he looks down at the floor. I start to feel a little bad for being too hard on him, so I pull him in for a hug, surprised as to how he’s my height now. I say, “If you want to, you could, but until then, it’s off limits.” 

I smile at him, and ruffle his hair a bit. I pull my hand back then put it back on his hair again, and play with a few locks. His face flushes, and he grins at me when I say, impressed, “You weren’t lying, you definitely have the best hair.” 

“You must be lying because you’ve seen my hair.” Bill interrupts and he walks out of the first year boy’s dorms. Charlie looks at me with a panicked look, and I contemplate if I should tell Bill about what just transpired. I play, “No, I have, Charlie’s hair is just better.” 

Charlie pokes his tongue out at Bill, and I grin, and Bill slaps the back of Charlie’s head. Charlie grimaces and mumbles, “You two really are best friends…” 

“Go on, back to your dorm, now.” I say, and he rushes up the stairs. Bill sits down on the stairs and he pulls me down by his hand. I notice how large his hand is compared to mine. I sit down beside him, on the other side of the steps and he sits opposite to me, backs against the walls of the spiralling staircase. Bill asks, “What was he doing down there?” 

“Got lost, I guess…” I trail off, deciding that Charlie’s learnt his lesson. Bill looks back at the first year dorms, and he explains, “One of Percy’s friends, Oliver, found me and said that he couldn’t find Percy, he was afraid that Percy got trampled or squished by the people at the party-” 

We both laugh, and he continues, “Then a few minutes later, Percy walks in, alright and everything…so, thank you.” 

“Hey, I had nothing to do with it, Percy’s very smart.” I say, keeping Percy’s secret. Bill fiddles with the carpeted floor of the stairs and he replies, “I know you he is, but I also know that you helped, he was out at the library again, just like you helped Charlie.”

I don’t say anything and so, Bill smiles at me, and he says, “You don’t have to take care of them, it’s my responsibility, I can do it myself.” 

“I know you can, but they’re sort of like my little brothers too, so I want to.” I reply, and we sit in the silence for a bit. It was a completely normal moment, Bill and I never felt the need to fill in the silence, but for some reason, he asked, “Does that mean that you think I’m your brother too?” 

The question takes me off guard, and my heart lurches to my throat. My eyes flicker between his, searching for the right answer. Maybe for the first time ever, I find Bill hard to read. I choose to give him the truth, so I think of what that is. I couldn’t classify Bill as a sort of family, but I also don’t know where I would put Bill. I opt for the simple answer , not wanting to think about more. I didn’t even know if there was more. I replied, “No…” 

He shuffles a bit closer and the air is charged between us. I pull my knees together and pull them to my chest, to make way for him to come closer. I brush an annoying lock out of my eyes, not wanting to spend a second not looking at him. He says, abruptly, "You're very handsome…”

He notices what he’s said and he flushes, I let out a small laugh and notice the way his face heats up, and how mine is also red. The contrast between his brownish red freckles and his skin and the way his nose seems to be at a perfect angle, Bill honestly was just so- “You’re pretty too”

He smiles at my comment, and he looks at my eyes, and I wonder what he’s thinking. Why can’t I understand what he’s doing? When have I ever not understood what he’s doing? Ever since Tonks made me realise how drop-dead gorgeous Bill is, I-

“If I’m not your brother, what am I then?” He asks, and he searches my eyes for the answer that I don’t even know myself. He isn’t my friend, it feels wrong to say it, and I don’t know what other thing Bill could be for me, but we’ve been friends for a decade now. I answer, “I don’t know.” 

“Friend?” 

“I don’t know.” I repeat, and I look down at the floor, not being able to stand his piercing blue eyes trained on me anymore. His hand grazes my cheek, pushing the hair behind my ear, the contact makes me shoot up to look at his eyes. It feels different, so much more different than any other look we’ve shared before. He adds, “I don’t know either…” 

His hand cups my cheek, and it feels so much more, but what even is more between Bill and I? He brushes his thumb over my cheekbones, and he leans in. My legs part slightly, so he can shift closer. I didn’t even realise what I’d done till he was only a few centimetres away from my face. He looks at me, searching, and then down to my lips. 

My breath hitches, and I can see his chest heave. My lips part under his gaze, and he leans closer. Maybe this is what more means for us? I don’t know what could happen after but I know this-I lift my hand up to encase his wrist. His eyes flicker back to mine, and I say, “You’re never going to be the same to me after this.” 

“You haven’t been the same to me in a while.” His last words before he gives me one last look before he kisses me. 

***

The summer passed by in a blur where it’s nothing but hazy memories of Bill. It’s not a surprise that I spend most of my summer at the Weasleys with my parents working all around the world. The surprise is the way Bill grasps my hand under the table, and the whispers between us are now sweet not taunts and games. 

He would send me cheeky smiles and flirty grins across the room. He would wake me up in the middle of the night and take me from Ginny’s room so we could go watch the stars outside the Burrow, laying on the grass, just like now…

“I can’t believe that we’re about to go back to Hogwarts in two days.” Bill says, as he wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me impossibly close to him. Contact has never been unknown between us, but this was entirely new. I run my hands through his long hair, and I sigh, “Yeah, two more years and we’re out of Hogwarts.” 

“Everything will change…” I trail off, scared of what’s to come, when we’re getting real jobs and we’re not sheltered anymore, out to fend for ourselves. Bill looks at me and I can see the stars shine from his eyes, and it’s a mesmerising sight. Bill pecks my lips before saying, “Not us, never us.” 

I smile as he nuzzles his face into my neck, and I wrap my arms around his back. I hope he’s right, I really do hope he is. I don’t know what I could do without Bill. I wonder if his family knows about us, if they feel what’s changed. The only one who does know is poor Percy when he wandered off in the library only to find us snogging in between the bookshelves. 

The other person who knows about us is Charlie but that’s because the boy was smart when it comes to things like these. He noticed the blush on my cheeks first then Bill’s smiles and then one day he dropped his spoon under the table during dinner and he saw our legs intertwined. He didn’t mention it at first until the next day, when he did the same thing on purpose, and he noticed Bill holding my hand. 

He spent the entirety of that week trying to find us doing something. When we were together, he would suddenly burst through the door screaming, ‘AHA!’, and then he’d find us playing cards on the floor. We realised what he was doing early on, but we let him have his fun, until one day, he gave up and burst through the door once again, and said, “Why won’t you guys tell me that you’re dating?” 

I answered first, “Because we aren’t…” 

Bill nodded along, but Charlie looked beyond confused. He questioned us; Do you hold hands? Spend time together? Act all cute and annoying? Kiss each other? Bill replied yes to all of the questions and then Charlie asked us why we weren’t dating already, and I couldn’t help but wonder the same thing as well. 

I run my hands through his hair and I ask, tentatively, “Bill…” 

He hums, and I try to find the courage to ask before it’s all gone and forgotten because I need to know. I try to ask the most dreaded question in the world, in a confident matter like it didn’t matter at all to me what his answer might be, instead I stutter, “I-What are we?” 

He pauses, tenses, a few seconds pass then he lifts his head out of the crook of my neck and he hesitates, “I don’t know.” 

A beat passes, and I press, “I mean, when we go back-to Hogwarts, and some girl asks you out, what will you say?” 

He reaches the hand that was wrapped around my waist and rubs the back of his neck. He replies, “I don’t know.” 

“What if a guy asks me out?” I ask, scanning for answers in his eyes, hoping to elicit a reaction that he would care if he were to share me with someone else, that he’s mine and I am his. He shrugs his shoulders and says, “You’ll just say what you want to say.” 

He puts back his arm around my waist and he puts his face back into the crook of my shoulder. I sigh, unsatisfied with the answer. I place my hands back into his hair and play with the long ginger strands. His breath tickles my neck and he starts planting kisses on my shoulder. He trails them up to my neck and I sigh, contently. He begins to nibble and suckle the skin while I begin to tug on his hair. 

He lowers his hand that’s on my waist, bit by bit till he reaches my butt. He squeezes firmly causing me to gasp and press my hips forward towards him. I feel it, I feel him and Merlin, he’s- His hand trails lower to my thighs and it encourages me to sling my leg around his hip. His mouth moves up to my jaw, and then to my mouth. His tongue slips inside my mouth and he pushes his hips against mine. He groans and I pull away, I ask, “Here?” 

“What if your parents wake up, or someone notices? We can not traumatise someone else like we did with Percy and Charlie-” Bill silences me by pressing his lips against mine and that’s when I feel him start to harden underneath me. I moan as I wrap my legs more firmly around him as I press our hips tightly together. Bill pulls back this time, and he looks over at me, my hair sprawled everywhere and I feel the heat in my face. I press my hands to my cheeks feeling the difference in temperature. I ask, “Is my face red? It feels like it is.” 

Bill smiles and pulls my hands down and kisses me. He replies, “No, it’s perfect.” 

***

Bill Weasley is my first everything, kiss, first time, first whatever this thing was, and first heartbreak even if we technically didn’t stop. I was alright with it, I was because it felt like he was just as into me as I was into him. Just because we didn’t label the thing that we had doesn’t mean that we have to. It’s Bill, and I trust him. 

It was all going alright, more than alright, it was great, there wasn’t a moment that I didn’t spend with him, and I was so sure that I was falling for him, if I hadn’t already. I was on my way to Ancient Runes when I heard Bill’s voice, I perked up, until I heard another female voice with him. I slow down and I overhear the conversation. 

“Do you?” The female voice asks. 

“No, I uh, I don’t.” Bill

“So, you don’t have a girlfriend?” I can hear the grin in her voice

“Nope, I’m single.” 

I feel my eyes well up and I take a few deep breaths willing them away before deciding that I’m going to be taking a different route, and I end up late to class. The thing that I was worried about happened, and ugh, what am I going to do with myself if he does end up getting a girlfriend and it’s not me? 

I avoided Bill like the plague for a week, the only Weasleys I’m speaking to were Charlie and Percy, but even then it hurt, they looked so much like him. I cried more than I’m proud of, and even when Bill did try to talk to me, I would simply just walk away. 

It’s been exactly a week since I overheard Bill and I’m on my way to ancient runes once more. Someone calls my name, and Edgar Bones walks over to me. I wait for him to catch up and he smiles at me with a boyish grin. Bones asks, “You need a walk to class?” 

“Umm, I’m alright.” I reply, and walk on, but Bones follows. He walks along beside me and says, “Well, I’d like to give you one if you don’t mind.” 

I don’t reply and simply make my way to class, hoping that Bill wouldn’t get the wrong idea seeing me and Bones- wait, why should I care about what Bill thinks? He’s not my boyfriend as he’s made it very clear to some girl. I take Bill out of my mind and walk on. Bones walks beside me, an appropriate distance away. Halfway through the walk he looks towards me and asks, “Would you like me to carry your books?” 

“No, I’m alright.” I reply and adjust my bag over my shoulder and the books that are on my arm. I wonder what he might be doing walking me to class. Over the past six years, we’ve only had a few conversations all involving school or Quidditch. Nonetheless, he reaches over and grabs the books out of my arm, and I mumble a thank you at the kind gesture. 

We reach the door of the class, and I stand there. I look around while noticing Bones shuffling on his feet. I decide to be blunt and ask, “Bones, we’ve talked about four times since we’ve known each other, why are you walking me to class and holding my books?” 

“I-uh, I know this is out of the blue for you, but I-” He cuts himself off and looks around nervously. His gaze falls on something behind me and I look around to see McLaggen giving Bones two thumbs up, I look back at Bones confused and he clears his throat. He asks, “Would you like to go out with me?” 

It’s my turn to look around nervous, and shuffle awkwardly on my feet. I reply, “It’s just that we don’t know each other that well.” 

“I was hoping we’d get to do that over some butterbeer.” He says, and I notice the red tint on his cheeks. The silence is tense. I think it over; Bones is quite fit, and he’s one of the smartest people in Hufflepuff, I’ve heard he’s actually quite kind also. Besides, not like anyone is holding me back anymore. I say, “Sure then.” 

He beams and he raises his hand up in a thumbs up, no doubt to show McLaggen, it’s sort of cute, if you think about it. He plans, “How about tomorrow? I’ll pick you up at eleven and we’ll head over to the three broomsticks?” 

“That sounds good.” I say, and he grins. He hands me my books back then says quickly, “Well, I’ve got class in two minutes, so I have to run. I’ll see you tomorrow!” 

He breaks off into a run, McLaggen following behind him, and I head inside class. I sit in the middle beside the wall where I usually sit, and think about this date. I don’t like Bones, but most people don’t have feelings for the person that they’re going on a first date with. After the date is when the feelings pop up. It’s actually nice to be asked out, and not to be kissed once everyday when no one’s watching. 

I was getting excited about the prospect, thinking about what to wear, how to style my hair, when Bill walks in. He looks at me with a deep frown and heads off to sit beside someone else. I expected him to try to talk to me like he has in all of our classes, but he didn’t. He stares out the window for the entirety of class, which is unlike him, especially during the class that made him realise that he wanted to be a cursebreaker. 

I take a few notes, more than I usually do without noticing just in case Bill needed some after class. He would do the same when I would doze off during class or when I was sick. The bell rings and I put my books in my bag and sling it over my shoulder, holding a few on my arm. I barely walk out of class when someone pulls on my bag, pulling me back as well. I say, “Hey!” 

“Is it true?” Bill asks, just as I register that it’s him and not someone that I don’t know. His cheeks are flushed, but in the way that makes him seem agitated. I look at him confused and I ask, “What?” 

“You’re going out on a date with Bones? Is it true?” He asks, and I find myself pursing my lips and avoiding to answer. He runs a hand through his hair frustrated, and then continues, “Cause maybe, you didn’t know it was a date? Did you know?” 

“Can we not do this here?” I ask, when I see people stopping walking around and looking at me and Bill instead. A few whispers follow, and Bill grabs my hand to lead me somewhere more crowded. We stand in front of a large window with the sunlight beaming through and it’s near a hidden alcove where no one comes often. The hallway is empty and Bill doesn’t say anything before he sighs and asks, “Are you really?” 

“Yes.” I reply, and I can see his shoulders fall. He takes a few steps closer to me and asks me, “Did you know it was a date?” 

“Yes, I did, I’m not an idiot.” I snap, and his shoulders tense over and his frown deepens. His stance becomes defensive and he folds his arms over his chest. He says, “Bones is a dick, he just uses girls for sex, and he’s a big jerk.” 

“No, he’s not-” 

“He’s mean to his family and he treats his friends badly-” 

“No! He doesn’t, Bill.” I shout, “Stop making him try to seem like a jerk just so I won’t go out with him.” 

He bites his lip and looks away. His chest is heaving and his jaw clenches. I take a step back and I whisper, “You don’t have a say on who I go out with, you’re not my boyfriend.” 

Bill eyes me for a moment, and I try to stand my ground. He sighs, before turning around and leaving in a huff. I can hear his angry footsteps even after he’s out of my line of sight. 

***

The entire time when I’m getting ready to go out on a date, I think of Bill. Bill always said he liked my hair up, so I’m keeping it down. He liked me in red, so I’m wearing blue, anything to keep him out of my head. It’s my first ever date with a guy who might actually want to be my boyfriend instead of Bill who would kiss me and leave. 

10.55

I walk downstairs and decide to wait the last few minutes outside the common room while I wait for Bones. I’m just about at the end of the stairs when Charlie rushes over to me. “Hi, Honey!” 

“Oh, Hi Charlie.” I wave to him while he walks over to me. He smiles and he walks over to me, way too slowly. He reaches me and asks, “What are you doing dressed up so nice?” 

“Nothing much, Charlie.” I reply, not wanting to tell the boy that things with Bill and I are what they are. He looks me up and down, and narrows his eyes at me. He asks, “Are you going out on a date?” 

10.57

“I uh- yeah.” I say, reluctantly. Charlies purses his lips, thinking. He looks at me, confused. He thinks out loud, “That’s weird, Bill told me that he wasn’t going to Hogsmeade today.” 

“I’m not going with Bill.” I say, and Charlie’s face falls and he’s looking at me with those heartbroken puppy eyes. My heart aches, and I can’t stand it much longer. I rush, “I’ll talk to you later, Charlie.” 

10.58

I look up from my watch as I make it to the door of the common room when a small little redhead steps between me and the door. Percy grins up at me, and pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He holds a book out to me and he asks, “Hey, honey! Could you help me with this potions chapter?” 

“Of course, Percy just when I head back, it’s hogsmeade weekend.” I explain and his smile falls. I wonder why I am breaking all of the young Weasley’s hearts today. Percy asks, “Where are you going at Hogsmeade?” 

“I’m not sure you’d know what I’m talking about Percy, you’ve never been there before.” I reply and look back at my watch. 

10.59

“I still wanna know.” Percy insists, and I reply, “I’m going to this place called ‘the three broomsticks’ where I’m going to have some drinks and stuff like butterbeer.” 

Percy nods his head, looking intrigued. He strokes his chin like an old man deep in thought. He says, “Tell me more about it.” 

“I would love to, Percy and I will, but I have to get going now.” I say, and he frowns, I ruffle his hair and try to soften the blow, “But how about, when I get back, after lunch maybe, we can go to the library and I’ll tell you all about it and I’ll help you with potions.” 

He nodded and then quickly ran back up the stairs…weird. I finally open the door to the common room and I see Bones standing a few feet away from the door. He waves to people in our year as he greets them. 

11.00 

I look at my watch and I smile at his punctuality. He grins when he sees me and I offer a polite smile back. I walked over to him and he met me halfway. He tells me that I look pretty and I tell him the same. He loops our arms together and we walk through the castles to where the carriages are being pulled towards Hogsmeade. We talked a little most of the time but a lot at other times. We sat watching the snowfall on the ground from the window. He tells me his favourite season is spring, I tell him mine is autumn. 

He told me how this is his first date and I told him the same. I can tell that he’s itching to ask Bill and I’m dying for him not to. We drink butterbeer and he offers to pay. We talk about our plans and how he wants to be a healer. I tell him that I’m not sure. He said that it’s okay. I smile at him as he tells me that he loves Potions and he does the same when I talk about Arithmancy. 

When we’re in the carriages heading back when there’s about an hour left till lunch, he tells me he’s had a great time and I tell him the same. He pulls his jacket around my shivering arms, and then leans forward to kiss me. I reciprocate and then he tells me that he wants to hold on to the date a little bit more. 

We hop off the carriage and it takes us the better part of an hour to walk back to the castle ourselves. We talk for most of the time, the other half just listening to the sound of our footsteps on the snow. He trips over a branch on the ground and falls face first into the snow. His face leaves an imprint on the snow and I bend over laughing. He throws a snowball at my face, and that’s when the snow fight begins. 

We fall on the ground when he asks if I like Bill, and dreadidly I say yes. He assures me and tells me that he’s still happy to have known me better. We decide that if he’s ever in need of an Arithmancy tutor that he can come to me, and his door is always open when I need help with potions. 

The date ended and it was a good first date even if it didn’t end with a new romantic prospect.  Lunch is almost over, so I grab a few snacks from the Great Hall before heading over to my dorm to change before meeting up with Percy in the library. Charlie stops me as soon as I enter the common room. 

“I need your help!” Charlie exclaims and I get worried very quickly. He drags me by my hand up the staircase to the boy’s dormitories and I hope that the staircases don’t turn into a slide beneath us. He leads me up and up and up the stairs till we reach the fifth year boy’s dorms. Bill’s dorms. On our way there, he asks, “You said Bill doesn’t like alcohol.” 

“He doesn’t.” I reply and Charlie tuts before he opens the door to Bill’s dorm. I smell the alcohol before I see Bill. He’s lying on the floor, with his hand wrapped around a bottle of Firewhiskey. I hear some tiny sobs before walking over to him, falling to my knees in worry. I wave over to Charlie, motioning for him to leave while I take care of Bill. 

Bill beams when he sees me. His hand reaches over to cup my face, and he stutters, “You’re very very pretty, honey.” 

I press a tiny kiss to his forehead to soothe him, and he closes his eyes in momentary bliss and I can see the tears streaks running from under his eyes and over his cheeks. I lean to grasp the bottle of Firewhiskey from his hand, but he tightens his grip over it. He protests, “No!” 

“Come on, Bill. You don’t even like this thing.” I insist and pry the bottle out of his fingers. I put it away on one of his other roommates' nightstands.  Bill frowns, “I know, I know, I just need it today, just today…” 

He lets out a sob, and I push him up so he can sit upright and rub circles on his back. He leans his head on my shoulder and he holds my hand. He sighs softly and I ask, “Why do you need it today, Bill?” 

“Cause you’re o-on a date.” Bill says, and my heart pounds under my chest. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen Bill like this. He rambles, “You went out with someone else, you laughed and you went to the three broomstick, and he kissed you-” 

“Wait, you followed me?” I ask, anger bubbling. Bill notices and he quickly lifts his head from my shoulder and looks at me, eyes wide. I still push a strand of his long hair over his eyes. He grasps my head from his face and he chokes out another sob, “I couldn’t help it, I love you!” 

I gasp, and Bill sobs covering his face with his hands. I look away, feeling my eyes water, why couldn’t he feel those emotions when sober? I blink away the tears and I pull him to my chest, and he wraps his arms around me, hugging me tight that I might fear for my ribs. I pet his head and whisper, “It’s okay, it’s okay.” 

“You can’t like him, I love you!” Bill repeats and I can’t help but start to let a few tears slip. Bill shouldn’t be spilling anymore thoughts when he’s like this, especially if they might not be true. I say, “Let’s get you to bed.” 

“Only if you stay.” Bill says, and I nod my head. I help him up and he falls. He starts tripping over his feet, as I lead him to his bed, the one with the photo of his face on the nightstand beside it. I cover him with a blanket and I move away from him. He grabs a hold of my wrist. I reassure him, “I’m only going to get the trash in, just in case you decide to throw up.” 

He nods, and then lets go of my wrist slowly. I grab the trash bin and a glass of water, and set them both beside him. He grabs me again, and he pulls me on top of him. He smiles when he sees my face. He cups my face and rubs his thumb across my cheekbones. It felt nice, like it wasn’t complicated at all. It felt the same way it did during the summer, and I covered his hand with my own. His smile dropped and he asked, “Why did you have to go away?” 

“What are you talking about, Bill?” 

“You haven’t talked to me in a while.” Bill says, and I clear my throat before correcting him, “A week isn’t a while.” 

“A few minutes not talking to you is agony enough.” Bill says, and I sigh. He looks up at me with those bright blue eyes, and his other hand goes to my back, lifting up a slight part of my shirt before settling down on my warm, bare skin. I answer, “You told a girl that you didn’t have a girlfriend.” 

He frowns and purses his lips, thoughts travelling throw them, slower than they would if he were sober. The pieces joining together before his lips part in astonishment. He asks, “You want to be my girlfriend?” 

It takes me a moment. I didn’t know at first, but the feeling of it, of having him call me his, kissing him whenever I can. I still don’t think that would be enough, I want more, so much more than just that. I reply, “I want to be more than that with you Bill.” 

“How?” 

“I don’t know.” 

***

“We’re just so proud of Bill for taking this step forward.” Molly gushes about Bill to me. We’re all sitting at the dinner table just a month into the summer before our seventh and final year. The Gred and Forge, Ginny and Ron are on one side of the table. Arthur sits at the head at the table Charlie opposite to him while Molly sits next to Bill who sits next to me. 

None of the kids care about the conversation, just eating little chicken nuggets and some fries with chocolate milkshakes, playing with each other. As Fred and George tell eachother jokes, while Ron munches on his food. Ginny just plays with her hair trying to braid tiny strands of it without looking. 

Charlie is just rolling her eyes at how much Molly is gushing about Bill, while Bill flushes trying to get her to stop, embarrassed. Arthur is making sure that Fred and George don’t set the table on fire, due to previous experiences. Molly says one thing that peaks my interest, “I mean taking an internship that could lead to a job in Egypt, obviously he’ll visit a lot-” 

“What internship?” I cut Molly off asking, tense, and the table went silent. I look at Bill questioningly. Bill swallows his last bit of food before turning to look at me. Molly exclaims, “Oh, I’ve said something wrong, Haven’t I? I’m sorry.” 

“No, it’s alright, Molly.” I reassure her from behind Bill, while he pets his mother’s arm. Bill clears his throat and looks at me explaining, “I didn’t take it, I still have to get accepted.” 

“In Egypt?” I ask, frowning at the far off place, in an entirely different continent. He says softly, “Yeah.” 

“It’s a curse breaking internship, and who knows maybe I’ll be working there around tombs and mummies and-” Bill explains, and I question, “And you’re just going?” 

“If I get accepted-” 

“And you’re gonna leave.” I point out, and he looks around awkwardly as Ginny starts asking Arthur where Bill is going and why he’s leaving. Molly and Aurthur usher everyone out of the dinning area just leaving Bill and I there. We sit in silence, and I don’t know where to even start. Don’t go, stay. How could you leave? I start, “Were you going to tell me about this?” 

“I didn’t want to tell you before I got it, would’ve been a lot of worry for nothing.” Bill says, and I turn around my chair to face him. He does the same. Our knees touching and legs intertwined. I ask, “And if you get it?” 

I wait for his answer as he looks down at the ground and I put my hand out grabbing his hand in mine. I play with his hand with both of mine and I place it on my lap. HE stays silent and I ask, “Would you go?”

“I-I don’t know, probably.” Bill says, and I feel pieces of my heart start to crack off. My hold on his hand tightens and I question, “What about your family? I’m sure Molly needs a helping hand around here. Charlie and Percy need their older brother, Who’s gonna keep Fred and George in line? Ron looks up to you, and Ginny loves you so much-” 

Bill cuts me off with a strong kiss on my lips while his hand encases my face. It’s the first one in a while and I relish in it. When Bill woke up after my date, he couldn’t remember anything but through a heated discussion we decided to take a few steps back. He was just my friend again. I hold his face in between my hands, and I whisper softly, “I need you to stay.” 

Bill places some more kisses onto my face and he hugs me tightly. I pull him closer, and think of how he could go. Go and be so far away. I ask from the crook of his neck, “How long would this internship be?” 

“A year.” 

“That’s not a long time…” I convince myself and him. He grabs my waist tighter and he says, “Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure that I won’t get it.” 

But he did. 

***

After a year of not seeing Bill, my first year working as the new professor of Arithmancy at Hogwarts, I might as well be jumping off the walls, bursting from excitement just to see him again. We had spent our seventh year in agony waiting to see if he got the internship or not, and when he did, I spent the last of the year, holding onto him until he had to leave. 

He didn’t kiss me once that year, except when we were on the train for the last time, heading back to platform 9 ¾ . We stayed as we were, except I stayed true to my word. I couldn’t see him as simply my friend anymore. Whenever he hugged me I wanted to savour that feeling forever. When he talked I wished I could listen to him talk forever and have those lips on mine. When he held Ginny and played with her hair, braiding it, I couldn’t help but picture a future like this, with him. 

When he came back, flew in through the Floo network from the ministry, I wasted no second in running towards him and wrapping my arms around his neck. The sounds of his siblings cheer loudly and they push me aside to hug their brother, and I chuckle at their love for him.

He flicks Fred and George’s hair telling them to stop getting so tall or they might catch up to him. He tells Ginny that she’s still as beautiful as ever, and for Ron to set up the wizarding chess board for a game later tonight. He asks Percy to get all his books ready so he can tell him an in depth description about all of them, and for Charlie to start stretching so he can beat his ass in quidditch. All the while, he shoots me looks from over their shoulders. 

Molly kisses her son and scolds him for not writing more often, he tells her that there simply wasn’t enough time, and then Molly, ushers everyone out. I stare at Bill and notice how his arms got larger and he became more chiselled (if possible), I point to the most notable difference. I point to his hair that’s currently in a low bun, making him look so very handsome. I ask, “You grew your hair.” 

“Yeah, Mom’s already begged me to cut it twice already.” He chuckles, and I take a few steps forwards towards him. I hug him and put my arms around his neck, and he moves his head to kiss me instead. Kissing me hard, and passionately. It takes me by surprise and I gasp, “Bill, what?” 

I don’t get a chance as his lips are back on mine, kissing me harder. I chuckle at his intent, and he wraps his arms around me. Our chests pressed against each other. I breathe him in deeply, and I realise how much I missed him. Every little thing about him too. I pull away to breathe and Bill chases after my lips. That’s when I realise something’s wrong. He’s kissing me because he needs to, he’s holding onto me. 

“They’ve given me the job full time-” Bill says and I immediately frown. I start, “I-” 

He cuts me off with another powerful kiss and another few seconds of silence where I can hear my heartbeats in my ears due to the lack of oxygen. It felt so blissful despite the ache in my chest because of the lack of air and Bill’s words. Bill starts, “They want me to take the job and move their full time-” 

“Bill-” 

“But I won’t go, if you ask me to stay.” Bill finishes, and I’m struck by his words. He pecks my lips once more, and I’m left reeling with all this information. I smile, bittersweetly, “You got your dream job…” 

“But it’s so far away.” I say, and he nods his head. He pulls my hands in his and he can already feel where I’m going with this. He rants, “You asked me what we are, and I said I don’t know, I never knew, but now I do.” 

“You can’t turn down your dream-” 

“I know now, I know that I want you, and that I love you, and if you tell me to stay I will. I’ll stay, just tell me to. Tell me that you’ll be mine.” Bill says and he lifts his hands to cup my face, looking at me as if I was the most precious thing in his life, but I’m not. He says, “I never wanted to tell you because I was an idiot, an idiot who was scared that you didn’t want him, an idiot who thought that he would lose you, if he told you he loved you.” 

I counter, “This is your dream, Bill. Your future, what you’ve always wanted-”

“No, you’re my future and I’m sorry that I didn’t know it before, but I do know. Ask me to stay, please.” he begs, and I pull his hands down. I look at him cause this might just be one of the few times that I’m going to see him for a long time. I’ve long had the image of his face pressed into my mind. I need to make sure that it withstands the test of time. I reason, “I-I’m not going to make this decision for you by asking you to stay, you might regret as time goes on-” 

“I can never regret you.” 

“I’m not going to stand in the way of this opportunity for you…you need to make it by yourself. And I’ve always been yours…” I trail off, and press a kiss on his lips. He looks at me dejected and helpless. I say, “Now, let’s go back in, your family’s waiting for you.”

***

Bill’s heading to the ministry any second now to head to the Floo network so he can go to Egypt. His family is going with him, so they can watch him Floo away, and they asked me to come, but I couldn’t because seeing his face before he goes, I might do something stupid like ask him to stay just for me, or maybe go to Egypt right with him. 

Molly said she’d come and see me after, they all will definitely be in need of a hug, especially Ginny who’s not going to bear being the only one at the Burrow anymore. I prepared a lot of food for everyone to come and get while they all cope with having Bill move away. I’m not sure I’ve copped myself, I don’t think I ever will. 

Knocks echo on my door, and I wave my wand pulling the food out on the table that I’ve arranged mishapely to gather enough chairs for the entire family. I arrange a few more things with the flick of my wand and I realise that I’ve forgotten the cups. I head over to the cupboard, and I flick my wand over to the door, making it fly open. 

“Just let yourself in Molly, I’m just putting down the cups!” I pull out eight cups and I hold them in my arms haphazardly, I make my way to the table and start arranging them. I put down all the cups, until there’s two left- “I’m not Molly.” 

I looked over my shoulder to where Bill was standing, bags at hand. He smiles at me and I smile back. I look at the clock, and I say, “Couldn’t do without a goodbye? But you’ll miss your Floo time, and you have to go where you’re supposed to-” 

“I’m right where I’m supposed to be.” Bill says, and my bittersweet smile drops. I look at him questioningly. He couldn’t possibly mean- He answers my thoughts, “I’m not going.” 

He sets his bags down and I put the last two cups randomly on the table. I fiddle with my fingers anxiously. I say, “I don’t want you to throw away your dream for me.” 

“It’s more like picking one dream over the other.” Bill says, still standing by the door. He continues, “I want to be a cursebreaker, and I still can be here in England, but I can’t have the life I always wanted with you if I’m miles away, and that’s what I want more than anything.” 

It’s the last of the confirmation that I need before heading over to him, rushing into his arms, as he finally holds me, and he whispers that he loves me. He kisses me and I forget to brace myself over how dizzy and giddy he makes me, finally as my own.

a/n: hope you liked it!

[bunnies-and-blues]

Hello gorgeous, I hope life has been treating you well! Can I request mitsui, miyagi, sendo, and maki with a reader who likes to draw and often goes to their practice to draw them? If not or it’s too many that ok! Thank you for your consideration!🫶

─꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱─ slam dunk : my muse ! ☆

⸝⸝ tl;dr : sd boys with their artist partner ! involves hisashi mitsui + ryota miyagi !

⸝⸝ note : i took a bit of liberty and made the reader their partner, i hope that's okay ! idm making a seperate post wherein reader is their friend / admirer if ever :DD

hisashi mitsui + ryota miyagi . . . seperately !

the moment you and mitsui/miyagi became a thing he just became the cockiest person in the world . like, genuinely . it was really cute and endearing at first but eventually everyone's just pissed at him t-t

even more so when he's at practice ... all of a sudden he's extra energetic and his form is beyond perfect (not that akagi's complaining; if you get them to play well then that's all for the better)

he knows that you like to draw —its even one of the reason why he likes you so much ! — and the moment he found out that you drew him during his practices ... oh my god, ego to the roof !! /pos

mitsui flashes you a devilish grin, his eyes gazing upon the quick sketches you've made of his form. "i look great," he states. he winks as he walks back towards the ring, aiming for a three-pointer. "make sure to get my good side, yeah?"

look, mitsui's all cocky and arrogant when he's in front of the others (much to their chagrin), but in private — that's a whole different story . he's consistently sending kogure and akagi photos of your art, pretty much showing them off !!

and he makes sure to thank you for all of your efforts ; he'll buy you all the art supplies you want ! (and he'll try to draw you as well, but he's not the best at it ... )

miyagi is speechless when you show him your sketchbook. across the pages are drawings of him, each pose dynamic and vivacious. he could practically feel the energy radiating from your sketches. "this is amazing," he murmurs, heart-eyed. he looks up at you. "you're amazing."

much like mitsui, he'll show your art off — but he'll show it off to everyone. the basketball team, ayako, his classmates, his family- you name it !

what can i say ? he loves you !

akira sendoh . . .

"woahh!" sendoh exclaims, his eyes alight with glee when you show him your sketchbook. he takes it in his hands, holding it as if it was the most precious thing to exist. he traces the outline of his sketched-out form with a delicate finger, his grin spreading ear-to-ear. he looks at you with crinkled eyes, his smile as bright and warm as summer sun. "these are really good ! maybe you should teach me how to draw !"

sendoh is all smiles when he saw your drawings of him . he can't help it ! believe it or not, he's seen fanart of himself alongside the countless fanmail he's received, but never before has he had someone draw him so ..

he can't describe it, really . but all he knows is that it's the best art he's ever seen ! your art was warm, each pencil stroke filled with love and care, your affection for him reflected tenderly in the careful way you drew his features.

like with mitsui and miyagi, he'll gladly show off your art to the basketball team ! and before you know it, you'll have a line of the team members asking for you to draw them as well .

shinichi maki . . .

maki stares at the compilation of sketches in his hand. admittedly, he had felt a bit downhearted when he saw that you've been drawing during their practices, feeling as if you haven't been paying him attention, but he couldn't have been more wrong. he caresses the paper with a gentle hand, then pulls you in for an embrace. "thank you, my darling," he murmurs, his breath warm against your ear. "these are wonderful."

a gentleman through and through, maki makes sure to show his affections after receiving such a gift (even if you didn't mean it to be a gift in the first place) .

he starts giving back, taking you out on art dates and offering to buy you any art supply you want . even if you ask for just a simple pencil, he'll ensure that you get only the best quality !

unlike the other three, he'd want to keep your art of him for his eyes only . not that he's not proud of it or anything, but he just prefers for your art of him to be seen by only him ... not that it works (kiyota would find a way to snatch them from him when he's not working lmao)

[beatrixstonehill2]

Ashley and Jacklyn were two trans men who met online, in an Instagram group about fantasies involving detransition. Both were on T for a few years and strongly considered top surgery, but deep down they both had a different idea of what their futures looked like.... They met and chatted for a couple weeks, eventually moving in together, throwing out all of their boy clothes in favor of lingerie and other very girly clothes, embracing their bodies and becoming a couple of bimbos, doing porn for fun. They knew they just had to both get knocked up and sport the perfect bimbo body, with a belly carrying at least triplets for the summer. They didn't want any old porn actor to knock them up, so Ashley had an idea.....

Without telling her friend, Melody, that she detransitioned, she called and asked her to come by and visit her new boyfriend..... When Melody visited, she was shocked to see that Ashley completely detransed, and her 'boyfriend' was a buxom bimbo with a voice deepened by testosterone. Ashley told Jacklyn that Melody was her trans girl bff, and they've known each other since forever. Ashley walked up to Melody, giggling, telling her, "Mel, I know you had a crush on me. Before you went and transitioned into this fake girl, you were just another horny boy that stared at my chest, now look at you."

"I, um...... I don't know. We were young!" Melody said.

"God, look at his boy-tits. Jesus Christ they're fucking huge," Jacklyn said, groping Melody's breasts.

"I know.... almost makes him look like a girl." Ashley joined in, grabbing and kneading Melody's other breast.

"But just look at him, walking around in clothes like this, flaunting his cock." Jacklyn massaged Melody's noticeable bulge. "Fuck, it'd get so big if he stopped taking estrogen."

"I-I'd never do that...." Melody said, nervously letting Ashley and Jacklyn fondle her.

"Awww, come on, Mel," Ashley encouraged. "You're really telling me you don't want a massive cock to play with?"

"No! I could never detrans! I love being a girl...."

Jacklyn bit her her, stroking Melody's already sizeable cock. "You'd make such a pretty boy. Well, you already do, since you are a boy..... Girls don't have big hard cocks, dummy....."

"Guys....."

Ashley started fondling Melody's cock, too. "Man, these boy-tits and this cock. You have everything.... But I still say you ought to lose the boobs. Go on testosterone. Get this cock as big as possible."

"Guys, stop. I'm gonna cum...."

"Poor thing." Jacklyn pouted, massaging Melody's breast and cock harder. "So pathetic. It should be illegal for pervy boys like you to pretend to be girls..... I bet you jerk off in the girls' bathroom for fun, don't you?"

"N-No...." Melody looked away. "Well, sometimes....."

"Good little pervert!" Ashley said, slipping her hand into Melody's panties. "Go on, I know you have a crush on me. Doesn't matter that we both played dress up. I lived as a boy for years, yet I'm only a dumb breeder, and you? All the estrogen and makeup in the world can't stop you from being a perverted boy who's addicted to jerking off. It's your nature, darling...."

Melody came in her lingerie onesie, rolling back her eyes, shooting about three ropes of clear cum. "Fuck....."

"Awww, is that it? Hold on," Jacklyn said, returning a few second later. "Don't squirm, this won't hurt." She had grabbed one of her old syringes and filled it with some of her remaining testosterone.

Ashley giggled. "I thought we got rid of all that?"

"When you mentioned having a fake girl as a best friend, I figured we might need it....." Jacklyn injected Melody's hip full of T.

"No.....! Please!" Melody cooed, drooling lightly.

"Yes, my dear," Ashley said, turning Melody's head her way. "How's this? We're going to pump you full of T, get that cock over fifteen inches so you're hung like a horse, and you'll become our girly little boy-bitch? You'll get us pregnant, but only be allowed to cum when it's time to knock us up. We'll dress you like a perverted sissy still, but those big fat boy-tits have got to go. OK? You'll live with us, and answer to us. Are there any questions?"

Melody shook her head 'no'. "I'll..... be your perverted stud sissy...... you can use me however you please...... ❤️"

"I knew you had a crush on me after all these years. Now then, you need to practice on Jacklyn and I all day, learning to fuck like a boy, so you can get us nice and pregnant when that T kicks in, all right, slave?"

"Whatever you desire....."

[paper-mario-wiki]

what's ur favorite erb?

i dont have "favorite" as much as i have "the ones i watch every now and again".

"Blackbeard vs Al Capone" i might just like the way EpicLloyd speaks as Capone, but i also cant help but be utterly entranced by a shouting match between to middle aged men who want the other one to be scared. Favorite verse: Capone 1 (of 2)

"Wonder Woman vs Stevie Wonder" although this one still has the signature simple and cheesy bar structure that ERB is known for, this is PEAK in terms of performers. nicepeter and epiclloyd (the main guys) are great, but after the first 30 videos it became very easy to detect their individual deliveries and cadences. t-pain is pretty iconic in his performance of stevie wonder. Favorite verse: Stevie 2 (of 3)

"Stephen King vs Edgar Allan Poe" watzky was unfortunately cursed by god to forever look like a little twerp, but he works with it really well and it fits very well for the real-life twerp that was Edgar Allan Poe. and zach sherwin is always a charismatic force to be reckoned with, his uniquely clever writing style and flow shining. Favorite verse: Stephen King 2 (of 2)

"Steven Spielberg vs Alfred Hitchcock" this one's just good fun. its a little battle royale among a bunch of really famous pop directors. i know that the character-appropriate cgi background is a staple of post-season-one ERB, but i really appreciate these ones specifically for some reason. Favorite verse: Alfred Hitchcock

"Kryptonite" this isnt an ERB and is in fact a completely unrelated normal rap song but i was listening to this one today. my oldest brother listened to a lot of rap when i was young and this one was one of his favorites. i remember listening to it all the time when he would drive me to blockbuster to rent gamecube games. i didnt listen to it for a few decades, but i looked it up on youtube a few weeks ago on a whim and i really liked it a lot. it's all about smoking weed which i love doing, and the chorus is really catchy, plus the instrumental is one of my favorites. Favorite verse: Big Boi 1 (verse 3)

"The Joker vs Pennwise" both rappers somehow look like different versions of matpat in heavy makeup, and joker works in a natural "we live in a society" which i like. i think that's all i got for this one. Favorite verse: Joker 3 (of 3, because this is the one with the we live in a society bar, but all of his bars were actually really solid)

"Tony Hawk vs Wayne Gretzky" another one for the "zach sherwin is one of the best thing ERB has" pile. he delivers in a quaint (if a bit cartoonish) canadian accent a scathing comparison between the actual real-life achievements and significance and skill between the two actual athletes. which i think is very spiritually fulfilling considering the name of the series. Favorite verse: Wayne Gretzky 2 (of 2)

"James Bond vs Austin Powers" might unfortunate austin only gets 1 verse because it's far and away the best part of this one. aside from a clever pussy eating joke near the end between the two feuding bonds. Favorite verse: Austin Powers

"Nice Peter vs EpicLLOYD 2" this is an actual real-life catharsis event between the main two artists behind ERB who seemingly put very real and deep-seated creative and personal frustrations they have with each other into their verses, plus a very real burnout over this series that they put all their money on being The Big One, creating a legitimately tense feeling in watching their performances. for reference, Peter rips on how Lloyd is an alcoholic and is unwilling to let the channel grow or change, and Lloyd talks about how Peter is obsessive and manipulative, referencing a real life issue involving a friend they fucked over in the separate video he appeared in. Favorite verse: Lloyd 1 (of ??? this one is almost a duet at times really)

"Babe Ruth vs Lance Armstrong" this one is specifically here because babe's second verse goes extremely hard in an almost uncharacteristic way for a series with very middling raps in general. Favorite verse: Babe Ruth 2 (of 2)

i could keep going i think but i just scrolled to the top of the list and my face flushed with embarrassment at how long its getting so im gonna end it there. you get the idea.

[blank468]

One of things that fans bring up when talking about Bakugo’s development is that Bakugo knows Deku well than anyone else far beyond his bullying. He’s supposedly feels sorry/guilty for Deku for not only bullying him but for the fact that he’s going through a downward spiral since the minute he was given OFA. While at the same time he hates himself for his behavior and realizes how he acts is not the traits of a hero and is probably why All Might didn’t choose him as his successor.

Let’s say Bakugo has always felt this way post Kamino, specifically after his rematch with Deku, what does he do to fix this issue, while knowing the problems Deku is facing ?

Jack s**t.

Bakugo’s actions and behavior barely differ than before. Most of his presence after Kamino is honestly pointless and shallow because he has no real contribution to the story. Him being shoved along with Deku and Shoto to do the internship with Endeavor doesn’t do any thing but give us more annoying moments with him. He acts incredibly aggressive and inappropriate when he’s with the Todoroki family. He’s only in that arc so he can have power progression. His involvement with OFA doesn’t amount to anything other than mindless yelling, guilt tripping and him being incredibly obnoxious. While at the same time he insults the deaths of the previous users and All Might doesn’t see this as an issue. Bakugo and Deku don’t even have any interactions that’s not about heroism, OFA or about them trying to surpass each other. Having these two interact about some general stuff would give them a chance to improve their relationship. I honestly wished there was a conversation between these two after Deku returns to UA where Deku talks about their relationship and how he truly felt.

But of course this doesn’t happen and we get the exact same slop as before and Bakugo continues to projects his anger towards Deku thinking that’s it’s his victims fault for him bullying him.

Granted he has been shown to have some regret for how he treated Deku but he barely does anything to fix behavior towards him and only waited at the last minute to give his half assed apology.

You can say that him training with Deku when he unlocked Blackwhip is proof that he is helping, but this doesn’t mean anything because Bakugo instantly gives up all because him constantly trying to injure Deku isn’t working. It’s only later in chapter 336 we see these two training together along with Class 1A, but it’s late in the story and what was given was too little too late. We’re just supposed to believe that they have been training and understanding each other together on a positive level off screen.

This series can go on all it wants about how their favorite wonder boy has changed as a character and how he now has the traits of a true hero. But nothing about what he does and how he interacts with others ever conveys that claim in a way that looks believable. The story has shown us that Bakugo’s villainous behavior makes things worse for himself and around other like Class 1A, and he never once felt guilt

Bakugo has never had a real reason and any saying for his actions towards his so called best friend and towards everyone in general. His reasonings for being an asshole and to why he hates Deku either doesn’t do anything or just make him look even more petty and also come across as if he is emotionally manipulating everyone around him.(EX. The moment when Deku tells Bakugo that he got his quirk from someone happened because Bakugo made him feel guilty about hiding his quirk to him during the Ground Battle Trial.)

I seen people say that Bakugo’s line “I’m sorry Izuku for everything” means that he’s always felt haunted by his constant guilt for what he did and the long term affects of it, but he’s also sorry that things ended up the way they did.

The thing is; Bakugo I would think would have the curtsy to put some effort into how he treats Deku before and after his apology.

I think it’s fair to say that Deku’s self destructive behavior is because of Bakugo’s bullying and him treating Deku like a failure. And I know this is also because of All Might’s heroism and how Deku viewed him, but if you remember in his rematch with Bakugo, he made it clear that while he was inspired by All Might it was Bakugo that he looked up to the most.

Instead of having it where he realizes that action are petty and taking accountability during Villain Hunt, he’s chooses to not only puts the blame his victim but also puts all the blame on Deku’s destructive behavior and his issues of self worth on All Might. Meanwhile he has the nerve to say he’s the only one that knows Deku more than everyone else and people like All Might, Endeavor, Aizawa, Uraraka, Iida and even Shoto can just piss off.

Bakugo is supposed to have changed as a better person; he supposedly now has a better understanding of Deku is now caring to him and yet he’s still acts the same as he did before and continues to antagonize others to satisfy his ego. Meanwhile fans continue to excuse this as a subversion of our expectations. Granted the way he treats everyone is not as awful as he was Pre- Kamino, but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior and how lazy his development is. And no, him telling a child not to look down on others otherwise you won’t recognize your own weakness doesn’t work because he himself can’t even take his own words to heart.

This is just the creator’s attempt at trying to paint his favorite character in a good light without doing anything with him to have him earn it. I can care very little about him feeling guilty about All Might’s retirement. I personally don’t think it’s Bakugo’s fault for his retirement; I blame him for starting the rescue mission and making things worse during the Forset Camp Training Arc. I probably would have cared about Bakugo’s dynamic with All Might if most of their interactions weren’t him being incredibly selfish and down right being a prick to his idol for no reason.

[obsolescent]

Leon S. Kennedy Headcanons

Author’s Note: As you know, I write Leon in a certain way. Here’s headcanons that I have for him...I think about him a bit too much, I fear. My desire for Leon to be a country boy is the product of living in the south and also some projecting, lol. Some of these delve pretty deep and some of these are niche. If you want to share any headcanons that you have, please do. I love creating lore for characters that we know little about! Thank you to @roseglazedlens for reading over most of these for me! I’ll also be doing a NSFW version as well, the alphabet prompt.

Content warnings: Mature rating, no gendered language used for reader, nothing sexual but general discussion of Leon and his life so that involves alcohol, depression, suicidal thoughts, trauma.

NSFW Alphabet

Leon is more or less introverted from how he behaves in the games and movies, I was thinking probably INFJ-T for his personality type.

He’s bisexual. He likes whoever he can be comfortable and feel safe around, though with his hinted attractions, he prefers dark haired people.

There’s been speculation that Raccoon City is based around Springfield, Missouri, based on a few factors, so I tried to think of where he could be from. I was choosing based on my desire to have him connected to the south in some way while also not being too far from Springfield. We don’t know how far he traveled or how long it took him to get there during the events of RE2, unfortunately.

I thought of specifically around where Kentucky, Illinois, Missouri, and Tennessee meet. It would also be a convenient area for his family’s mentioned crime involvement.

Also why he doesn’t have much of an accent due to being near four different states. He is of Italian descent which is one of the canon things we know. KY, MO, and TN have a higher percentage of Italian Americans in the south from what I’ve researched. 

If I had to choose a specific city, it would be Paducah, Kentucky. Definitely more of a small town kind of guy. It’s also around 5 hours from Springfield.

I don’t believe he went into the foster care system, though it’s not stated. But I like to think the police officer who saved him adopted him.

Also I feel like he’s autistic in some way, generally based on how he acts and carries himself in the games. (He’s just like me fr)

His favorite brand of cars is Jeep.

He’s definitely the type of Jeep owner to wave at every Jeep he passes by while driving.

We know he likes Ducati too, he drives a XDiavel in Vendetta and DI.

He can do minor repairs, on both cars and motorcycles. A bit of a mechanic in his spare time when he’s home from missions, helping some of the others when they have car troubles.

His love language is definitely acts of service.

Even platonically, if he overhears a friend having a bad day, he’ll stop and ask if they need help with their work, or get them their favorite snack.

Romantically, he’ll bring you flowers, drive by your pharmacy to check if you have anything that needs to be picked up, tidies up the house, cooks for you, prepares you lunch for work, gives you massages if you’ve had a tough day.

He’s not the best at cooking, but learns quickly, so if you give him tips on how to improve, he’ll apply them to the next time he makes something.

Pretty sure blue is his favorite color, we see him wearing it a lot.

There’s speculation on what he smells like, I think even some perfumes made for him? But personally, I don’t think he would wear typical masculine scents, something more alone the lines of citrus/clean/fresh. One I think he would wear is Nautica Blue by Nautica. It smells so good.

He has some religious background. With how Leon behaves/carries himself, it leads me to believe his family were a part of the Church of Christ, which would correlate with the location I chose.

Leon, to this day, follows the church’s principles: “In essentials, unity; in opinions, liberty; in all things, love.” It’s something he repeats often in his head.

He sings, having taken it up at church. After the incident with his family, he continued, as it reminded him of attending, and of his mother, how she would sing him to sleep. He likes to pop into random churches during times of service.

Not straying too far in, just near the exit to join in with singing and reminisce on his own memories.

With singing, he's a baritone.

His favorite song is We Shall Be Free by Garth Brooks.

He’s all over with his music taste, from alternative to country, divorced dad rock, pop, to gospel hymns. If it has a catchy tune, he’ll like it, not too picky with music.

To get into the sad bits, we know he liked to drink to cope, a functional alcoholic.

He would have trouble sleeping through the night, drinking helped.

Sees a therapist and isn’t the most truthful during meetings. Afraid to open up about everything that’s happened to him.

In RE6, you can see a document where Leon confesses he’s thought about suicide, as far back as RE2, so he’s struggled with depression.

Doesn’t do well with large crowds or gatherings. Stays on the outskirts of any event unless he has to go deeper into the throng for the sake of a mission.

Firm believer of his corny one liners:

*Gets bill* “What’s the damage?”

“You’re barking up the wrong tree.”

*Starts raining* “We needed this.”

Also looks out the window/stands on the porch when there’s a storm coming.

He keeps a memory box. It holds items he’s kept from each of his missions. It’s small things, like a key, a piece of paper, photos, a keychain. He looks in it every once in a while, so he doesn’t forget about what he’s done, who he’s helped, and those who didn’t make it.

Not the best with technology, basic knowledge of what he needs to do and how to get to things, but doesn’t use it much outside of work.

He has to ask you for help sometimes, thankful you’re more knowledgeable on the topic.

Will always tell you goodbye when he leaves for missions, no matter what method he has to use.

Face-to-face, video chat, or even going to your work. He just wants to see you one more time before departing, in case it could be the last time. Though it’s unsaid between you two, it’s in the air, tinging it with sadness and trepidation.

When he comes back, though, he immediately notifies you and wants to see you as soon as possible. He holds you a little tighter than he usually does for the first few days after returning from a mission.

[spidrstar]

A LITTLE BIT MORE

★ pairing: aged up!miles1610 x latina!reader

★ warnings: all characters in this story are 18!!! suggestive i think?

★ summary: Miles has been your math tutor for the past few months and you can’t lie, he’s been sort of your lil bestfriend too because you tell him all about your boy problems and everything. It got to a certain point where you were about to let something personal slip.. specifically how you didn’t know how to kiss. Miles may be a lil nerd n a tutor n all but he still gets play, so you asked him to show you how to kiss and it slowly turned into more than that.. a make out session.

★ w/c: 2k

★ a/n: ok so ik i put up a poll for y’all to choose but.. i rly wanted to write abt 1610 miles esp for this one shot 😣 sry yall i got yall w the next one shot tho trust🙏

“Miles, please don’t make me do this problem on my own.. you know how I am with fractions.”

You groaned at just the sight of the problem and leaned back on your arms.

For context, you were currently in Miles’ room with three different text books sprawled out open on the floor. He’s been your math tutor for the past four months because you failed your last two math classes and couldn’t afford to fail one more because that would cause you to fail the grade. Today, you were both going over things that were going to be in your test at the end of the marking period.

You’ve been studying non-stop all week and grew tired of it (even though all you mostly did was get off topic and have endless conversations with Miles.)

“Y/n, c‘mon you can’t do this every time i’m tutoring you. Just try.” Miles smiled at your reaction to the math problems in the book.

“Can we please just take a small break?”

“..Y/n our last break was 5 minutes ago.”

“Exactly my point!! It’s been too long.”

He chuckled at you and had no choice but to give in. It’s not like he didn’t enjoy the silly conversations you both had. You both saw each other as.. you wouldn’t say therapists but more of a.. comfort friend? Just someone you could talk to freely basically. At this point you were practically each others best friend, you just hadn’t noticed it yet.

Miles always enjoyed your company, no matter what you both were doing as long as it was together. You rarely ever hung out together if it wasn’t involved with tutoring, but that wasn’t a bad thing. You would almost get tutored everyday because math just really wasn’t something you were good at..

“Soo.. what’s with you and that guy what was his name.. Ethan?”

“It’s Evan, and we fell out. I found him talking to two of my friends at the same time and I wasn't gonna stay around to see that unfold. I told them of course, just didn’t wanna be there to witness the outcome.”

He raised his eyebrows in surprise, Miles knew your situation with guys very very well. He knew almost all of the guys you messed around with, well.. weren’t the best. If he was honest, they sucked ass. They all seemed to go after you for one thing, your body. Miles always hated the idea of you talking to another guy, not in a weird or possessive way of course, he was just over protective of you. He always remembers the nights you would text him asking him if he was free just to cry in his arms.

Sometimes you would come in all moody to your study sessions too and for you that was off, because when you opened your mouth it never seemed to shut.

He palmed his face and sighed in disappointment of yet another shitty guy you messed with.

“I told you he seemed off. He was wayy too friendly for a guy that ‘only wanted to be with you’ I never trusted him and i’m proud to say i didn’t.” Miles quoted with his fingers.

You smiled and looked down at the floor deep in thought, “Yeah well, he was ugly anyways. Personality wise too, he never really made me laugh. When I did laugh around him I would laugh at him, not with him. Y’know?”

“Yeah, I would notice. Your laughs never seemed genuine around him.” He shrugged.

You smirked and cocked an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? And what’s ‘genuine’ to you?”

Miles leaned in and placed his palms on his knees looking up at the ceiling thinking of what to say.

“Like.. it’s hard to explain. Around me, your laughs just have a higher pitch and you lose your breath much quicker and you make random sounds while laughing which is what gets me to laugh. Then, around him your laughs were like so motone and you didn’t really hold onto your stomach as if it hurt from laughing so much, you get me?”

You stared at him in disbelief from how much he went into detail, you never thought of how much he really paid attention to you. Your face was a little bright red, you were flustered because you just felt so.. special? The feeling was unknown.

“Wow.. that’s—that’s a lot. I get what you mean though, his jokes were never as funny as yours were. You don’t even have to try to make me laugh.” You smiled.

He smiled back and made a proud expression, you knew what was coming next. Miles always made this face when he was about to brag about something.

“Thank you, I get that a lot from girls. I always make sure to keep them entertained and never treat them like shit. I don’t understand how you manage to find guys like that, I would never do what they do. Pretty sure my ma would kill me.” He chuckled at the last sentence.

You rolled your eyes at the bragging, you knew Miles had game and had many many girls falling for him. I mean, who wouldn't fall for him? Look at him, he has a great personality, he's caring, a momma's boy which, by the way, is totally adorable and he’s just so sweet and genuine. His smile was contagious and he was attractive too of course..

You snapped back to reality, your mind wandering off somewhere else.

“Bet you got lots of bitches huh.” You choke out a laugh trying to ignore the thoughts lingering at the back of your head.

“Nah, it may seem that way but I honestly got my eye set on one girl. I’m not bout that ‘playa’ shit y’know? Gotta keep it real and let ‘em know that cause leading people on ain’t what i’m about.”

You looked at him intensely, really wondering who this girl was. Although you felt the urge to beg him to tell you because you knew how stubborn he was, you didn’t. You were scared you weren’t gonna like his answer so you brushed the feeling aside.

You wouldn’t admit it to anyone but yourself (barely) you had feelings for Miles, you weren’t aware of it until about a month ago when you went on countless dates. On every single one, Miles was in your head and you couldn’t seem to focus on the person in front of you.

“That’s surprising, if you’re not a player like you say you aren’t how do you treat your girls?” You quickly switched the topic and switched the rolls.

“Well, ion be messin’ around with other girls or on that friendly shit y’know? Every chance I get ima flaunt my girl like she’s the lottery.” He smiled proudly.

You scoffed in jealousy. “Wow, I wish there were more guys like you shit ONE like you at least.”

Miles blushed a bit at the way you said you wanted someone like him. He quickly recovered and perked a brow, scoffing with a proud expression.

“Yeah well, I'm one of one. Can’t find anyone like me.”

“I just can’t believe it, I haven’t even been with one guy who’s good enough to show me how to-“

You quickly saved yourself from the embarrassment and threw your hands over your mouth. Miles took notice of this and he raised a brow at you and moved slightly closer.

“Show you how to what?” He asked, smirking only slightly.

Heat rose to your cheeks, you covered your face and grumbled from already feeling embarrassed even though you hadn’t even told him yet. You hid yourself in your knees not wanting to face him.

“C’mon I promise I won't laugh!” He begged.

“Yes you will! I know you!”

“I swear on my pet hamster's life I won't.” He spoke seriously.

You looked up a bit, sighing and agreeing to say what was on your mind, you had always been ashamed of it because you never really kissed just anyone. You wanted it to be special, of course you’ve kissed a few but your old self thought they were special when they weren’t.

“F-Fine. I—I..don’t know how to kiss.” You whispered the last part lowly, too embarrassed to say it outloud.

“A lil louder than that Y/n, it’s just you and me here c’mon.” He sweetly smiled at you placing a hand on your back.

“I don’t know how to kiss.” You said bluntly, looking straight to avoid his striking gaze.

All that could be heard were stifled chuckles and you turned to stare at the culprit, Miles was cupping his mouth with both hands trying not to burst out laughing straight in your face. You smacked the back of his head and scolded him for swearing.

“Miles! You swore on your hamster's life!”

Laughter erupted from him and could be heard loudly throughout the room. Soon he calmed down and collected enough breath to speak.

“He died like a week ago, it's fine.”

“What?! And you didn’t tell me?? Tu si eres malo.”

“Whatever, back on topic. You don’t know how to kiss? How? You’re like, genuinely one of the prettiest girls I know.”

You blushed at both the comment and from embarrassment. You were 18 almost 19 and didn’t even know how to properly have a make out session, not that it was your fault. All the guys you messed with genuinely sucked, and your lips were far too precious for you to just place them on anyone.

“Hey! No es culpa mía, i bet you’re not even good at kissing either.” I huffed angrily.

“Actually, I'm quite known for being a great kisser para tu información.” He admitted proudly.

Then, an idea spiked up in your head. He was your best friend.. you think? Might as well take this perfect opportunity to ask him for a favor, a huge one. This had you nervous though, because it could go two ways. He would say yes and show you and you both would continue to live your lives as if nothing happened, as normal friends right? Or.. you would be embarrassed for the rest of it if he said no. How would you recover from that? Whatever.. might as well do it now and pray nothing bad happened.

“Miles?” You finally spoke, with a serious tone hiding behind your words.

“Yes?”

“Could you.. um—do me a favor?” You spoke shyly, a wave of nervousness was coming at you and strong.

“Depends. What is it?” He spoke more lowly now with curiosity, he subconsciously moved closer to you to hear you clearly. In case you’d decided to whisper again since that was a habit.

You took a deep breath, preparing yourself for what was to become. This determined whether or not you would ever talk to him or see him the same, you seriously thought you wouldn’t be able to recover from this.

“Could you..maybe.. teach me?” You looked down at the floor again, biting the inner corner of the inside of your cheek. You were slightly sweating from how nervous you were.

A few seconds of silence passed before you looked up nervously. Many thoughts racing in your mind right now;

‘What if he was making fun of me in his head right now?’

‘What if he didn’t want to be friends with me anymore?’

‘What if he thought I was weird?’

‘What if he hates me now?’

Your thoughts were quickly put to a pause when he spoke up, you thought you were dreaming when you heard the words escape his mouth.

“Sure, I’ll teach you. But are you sure like, completely sure you wanna do this? I’m kinda rough with it, and i don’t know if you’d like it.” He spoke softly when looking at you.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, shutting your eyes and nodding. You smiled sweetly at him, your heart speeding up with a hint of excitement. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t think about kissing Miles at least once.

“Yes, I'm sure.” You stared at his eyes then his lips wide eyed, your eyes glistening with anticipation. Your lips were slightly parted as you oh so wanted to lean in and just kiss his pretty lips already, but you waited for him to instruct you on what to do.

He moved closer to you and sat in front of you staring at you with slightly hooded eyes. He smirked as he spoke and that’s all you seemed to notice.

“Alright, first you needa part your lips slightly which i see you’re already doing. Then, you just tilt your head to whichever side you prefer and lean in. Close your eyes obviously, then just follow my lead. Simple, you got it?”

You nodded once again, and blushed lightly as he leaned in closer. His hand made his way up and he gently placed it on the side of your neck and tilted his own head shutting his eyes to kiss you.

“Alright, here we go..” He whispered.

With that, he kissed you gently. His soft lips locked with yours, surprisingly you seemed to follow along quickly and placed one of your hands on his toned chest. Your breaths seemed to quicken with every second that passed and he started to lean in more, this time you were slightly pushed back. You held onto the front of his shirt pulling him down with you. Your forearms supporting your upper weight as you laid back on the floor.

Miles now completely on top of you deepened the kiss, his tongue softly grazed against your bottom lip asking for permission to enter which you complied to. He placed his hand back on your neck, his fingers resting on the bottom part of your lower head pushing you against him more. You let a low moan slip past you and you opened your eyes wide, with shock but quickly closed them back up once you heard the sounds he made.

The ‘agressiveness’ he mentioned now showing as low growls escaped his lips when getting a few seconds to breathe between kisses. His tongue fighting with yours for dominance which he quickly claimed.

He broke the kiss, a string of saliva showcasing how intense the kiss was. He smirked against your lips and you both breathed heavily against each other, chests heaving up and down rapidly. He caressed the sides of your waist slipping one hand under the hem of your shirt and leaned in to seductively whisper in your ear.

“I think I'm gonna have to teach you a little bit more than just kissing, ma.” He smirked.

★ translations: tu si eres malo - you’re so mean || no es culpa mía - it’s not my fault || para tu información - for your information ||

TAGS:

[obessed-with-fictional-men]

oh my sweet Gale

I will admit, the very first run through of this game i found Gale annoying, pushy, dumped trauma everywhere, narcissistic in his knowledge of magic, and the need to prove how right his in in the subject. I often found myself thinking and saying out loud "omg shut up"..... buuuuut... having romanced him...... i found that his personality traits are the exact same as someone born as a child prodigy, had his ego inflated, alienated by everyone around him, and made to think he was superior by someone higher up just to then land on his ass.

I wont go through what i think of his character development because each play through is different, and for each player its different... but this is what i think of him over all.

Gale doesn't know how to talk to people. He doesn't have social queues that almost everyone else picks up on. Gale has spent, up till the tadpole, the exception in a lot of the situations he was put into and thus it became his default personality. Yes, for those of us who have romanced him (keeps romancing him) we see someone haunted by their past choices and watch him grow. We see the nerd that he is, but this is more about the potential Gale before we meet him. So bare with me.

He was a child prodigy and put into a prestigious school where he flourished. I can only image how his professors loved him and his fellow students less than enthusiastic response. You know what happens when you become the teachers pet? You become ostracized by your fellow peers. You know what happens when you are really good at something that usually takes A LOT of practice for others? You either get used or don't make friends. Gale has had ONE story that involved other people and it didn't involve friends, he was at a bar and defused a brawl with ale. He has openly admitted to Tara being his only real friend.

Now this isn't to say Gale never had to work at his magic or arcane knowledge to get him to where he is in the game when he first meet him. He was an archmage and the chosen of Mystera, but his innate ability to wield it as a young boy is what got Mystera's attention. Gale has stated that she was his teacher first, then his muse and finally his lover. You can only imagine how special he felt when Mystera chose him to be his guiding hand..... and then to be a lover? I don't care who you are..... That shit would have to inflate your ego. That shit would make you feel like you were SOOO much better than your fellow peers. You would have those toxic thoughts and comments of "yeah, well Mystera chose me! So who needs friends/criticism/physical lovers/ect". What do you typically do when you catch the attention of someone you highly regard? You try to impress them and do what you can to be even more impressive! So Gale's ambition grew to newer heights. I cant imagine what Mystera poisoned his mind with while they were together. Like, i get she told him to just be content with the things were.... but come on Mystera... you couldn't have expected him to stop striving to be better with a simple "nah, you're cool how you are. you don't need to be my equal". Not when the poor man has spent the last 2 decades of his life striving to be the best. His most important years for growth and development have been spent on trying to impress others.

Gale learns of a way to possibly convince Mystera to allow him into her domain and it gets a carnivorous orb shoved into his chest, dumped, stripped of his titles and holed up in his tower without nary a reason why. That had to be the biggest blow he has ever received in his entire life. His act of what he believed to be a sure fire way into getting what he wanted ended up taking almost everything away from him. If it wasn't for Tara, i'm sure Waterdeep would have succumbed his to orbs blight. The man locked himself in his tower and turned away all his colleagues and family.

So imagine, you are this lonely person... squirreled away from others and any social interaction. No one to talk to except your pet *sorry Tara* and all of a sudden you find yourself on a ship.... with a parasite in your brain and then your thrust into an adventure with a bunch of strangers. You have this orb in your chest that could blow at any time and you cant really explain WHY you need magical items.... but that if you don't get them.... everyone is in trouble.... you find your group facing monsters and doing weird ass side quests.... and at any given opportunity, you like to drop a knowledge bomb on the group.... just to find that some of the group members don't like your input... or don't listen at all.. which doesn't sit well with you. You've been told how right you are for like... 20 years... You haven't been given many acts of kindness since becoming an adult, what with your abrasive "im more knowledgeable in everything and i've slept with a goddess" personality, so when you see your fearless leader doing something nice, you approve. You grown to trust this leader enough to tell them the truth.... knowing full well they may turn on you, but they don't! You continue to watch them, and share moments of magic with them, you fight along side them, and what is this? Are you starting to develop feelings for them? Are they reciprocating these feelings?

He gets a death sentence slapped on his back and these new budding feelings he has for you need to be made known. What better way than to show you how much you mean to him than to literally paint the sky in the weave for you. To take away the Shadow-lands curse and SHOW you something better. He thinks 'the most perfect night would have to be some place im comfortable and vulnerable.... so that i can SHOW them. This is me, Gale. This is my whole world and at the center of it, my very heart'. he is literally showing you who he is. he is this studious... lonely man.. who sits in front of his fire place reading and researching... or out on his terrace watching the sunset with a book. Like, do you accept this version of me that you have not seen yet? *Not to mention the weave/ astral projected 3 gale gang bang you get while spinning through the cosmos. He is such a show off... or he just isnt confident in his own physical/ mortal ability to woo and wow*

To watch Gale throughout my few play throughs grow as a person and learn that having to much ambition can oft lead to ruin... and watch him change to just be content with himself as he is... i get a lot of comfort from it. I haven't gone down the God route yet, nor have i tried to make him more villainous, but who knows lol.

I have a lot thoughts on pre-tadpoled Gale and how his life up to that point made him who he is when we are first introduced to him. Gale is definitely my comfort character.

Sorry for the rant... or maybe im not. Once again... these are my thoughts from my multiple play throughs.

[aashi-heartfilia]

Why BakuDeku will be canon and not IzuOcha? Connection between TogaChako and the entire Love Square...

So this is pure hypothesis and I should clarify that I'm not a shipper when it comes to MHA. I just love the story, its premise and the various themes that it involves and I love to see what happens next. I don't particularly support any ships and so with all that being said, let's jump into it!

So, Ochako said that "You should never hide your true feelings or that face of yours".

Horikoshi is very very clever with the panelling.

While most people were debating on whether or not it was an IzuOcha ship bait, I think it signifies something completely different.

Notice how Ochako was thinking about Deku as she said those lines but even in Ochako's imagination, Deku wasn't looking at her.

HE WAS LOOKING AT BAKUGO.

I mean, look at it.

He was a bit embarrassed and looking at someone else. It is most probably a memory from when they were training before the second war (when Bakugo was showing his new move Cluster to Deku)

But why would Ochako think about Deku looking at someone else during such an important time?

It parallels how Toga thinks about Twice in a completely platonic sense. He was more of a brother to her (Toga and Twice->brother sister bond)

Plus it also signifies Ochako's journey of self acceptance. Think about it!

When we met Ochako in the beginning, she had an inferiority complex about her hero motivation and background.

She met Deku, who played her knight in shining armor, who had this cool quirk and everybody loved him.

He was a Hero, and always in the spotlight. Even All Might was interested in him (according to Ochako because she never knew about OFA)

So she admired him and wanted to be like him as in wanted to be a great hero like him but it backfired because Ochako is Ochako and Deku is Deku.

Throughout the series, we see these feelings grow.

But with admiration, what Ochako always felt was jealousy....envy.

The theme of envy has been very prominent in the series. Bakugo is the biggest example of it.

I admit that Ochako might have had a tiny bit of crush on Deku because who wouldn't?

He is a cute, clumsy boy, well natured, a crybaby at times but a real hero at heart. Who wouldn't fall for that?

Plus it's not wrong to have feelings.

But in Ochako's case, she always felt that Deku is so far away.

It is such a literal representation!

Deku was moving forward while Ochako felt like she was lacking, like she is behind him, literally and figuratively.

We saw how she was struggling to deal with whatever she was feeling.

At first it looks like she is struggling to deal with her feelings for him, but at this particular moment her feeling could only be described as envy.

Admiration could easily be confused for love but!

You're never jealous of the person you love!!

Because till season 3 Ochako was feeling both admiration for his best friend (which everyone else confused for love) and jealousy.

It was especially awkward because they were friends and their other friends kept on pointing in that direction.

But the real change came in the war arc when Ochako got Deku's letter and realised that maybe Deku is not that special after all.

They are good friends, and she was worried about him because she realised that behind the Hero persona that Deku has, he is also human.

Being a fellow hero, it was more relatable to her.

"Special powers are one thing but there is no such thing as a special person" she said in her speech.

Humanizing all heroes and villains.

I also wanna talk about this specific panel after Bakugo's apology.

Something about Ochako's expression here really struck a crod.

As Deku falls in Bakugo's arms, the camera pans on Ochako who just stands there observing, what true love is.

She didn't feel anything, because she realised the bond between BakuDeku is a bond of love.

Which is why she never made an effort to follow Deku's footsteps again.

The famous cliff scene: the day before the second war! Both of them knew they could die the very next day and yet they chose to say nothing... Nothing as in love confession, because there was nothing to confess.

Ochako realised that Deku loves and admires Bakugo and she's ok with that, so she'll focus on more important matters, like the Toga situation.

Because she realised, she can be her own Hero.

And now she wanted to help Toga. A girl like her, that was crying.

Because she has seen so many happy faces, she cannot help but wonder what made Toga cry.

Plus Toga said that only heroes and the people they protect are counted as people and the rest don't even matter.

As a person, Toga should be free to love whoever she wants but because of her quirk she is constantly judged by people except LoV.

Toga was mad because nobody accepted her throughout her entire life, her parents, her friends, Heroes and the one place where she found home was also snatched away from her.

Everyone is free to love and admire heroes then why not Toga. Everywhere she went, she was rejected.

Even Deku's quirk pointed out that there was no real malice behind TOGA's actions. Her love is so strong that it puts people in danger.

Heck, Danger sense didn't activate in the beginning because Toga didn't wanna hurt Deku.

But it was after she was rejected so badly, that she turned against them.

It was not about a girl asking a boy out but a villain asking a hero out.

And Deku not only rejected her completely but also judged her.

So if the world rejects her, she is bound to do the same!

Which made Ochako the perfect person to face Toga. Both are girls full of love but hide deep inferiority complexes.

Ochako understood this and told Toga her smile is beautiful.

Why? Because Ochako realised it the hard way, what happens when you suppress your feelings which is why she admired Toga and told her that Toga is right and she should never hide her feelings or her face because she is beautiful.

She admired Toga for her genuine honesty and told her that it is nothing to be ashamed of.

Toga went on a rampage because Deku hurt her (he was the final nail in the coffin) but just because Deku rejected her doesn't mean the end of the world.

Toga is free to live her own life, just because Deku rejected her doesn't mean her life is finished and if she really wants to have a girl chat, Ochako will always be there!

She'll give her blood to Toga for the rest of her life..!!

It's just Ochako's way of telling Toga that just because a boy rejected her doesn't mean her life has ended. That Toga is beautiful and has a lovely smile. And if toga wants to talk about it, Ochako will be more than willing to listen and support her for the rest of her life.

And such is the beautiful dynamic of TogaChako.

Cheers! Sunshine!

[chelseachilly]

THIS LOVE - chapter one | i can make the bad guys good for a weekend

pairing: ben chilwell x reader

rating: T

word count: 2.5k

summary: you and ben attend your first event as a “couple” - chelsea’s annual charity gala

A/N: thanks for all your messages about the little prologue i posted last week! i’m so excited for this story and i’m glad you guys are too :) this chapter title is from blank space by taylor swift, each chapter will correspond with a 1989 lyric

previous chapter | view all chapters

You don’t know what you anticipated your life to look like after you agreed to be Ben’s fake girlfriend, but it proves very quickly to be more of a commitment than you imagined.

In the first week alone, you have to go two meetings with him and his team to discuss what your “relationship” is going to look like, what your story is, and how you’re going to sell it to the public.

His publicist also tries to get you to sign a contract and an NDA, both of which Ben insists are unnecessary.

It feels weird for you to be involved in such an elaborate lie, and Ben obviously senses your discomfort as he tells you a few times that you can back out if you want. You know that he needs this, though, or he wouldn’t have asked you in the first place, so you wouldn’t dream of it.

You end up going with a simple story that doesn’t deviate too much from the truth - you two are childhood best friends who recently realized there’s more than friendship there and decided to explore a romantic relationship. The only change you have to make to your lifestyle, according to Shreya, is attending some high-profile events as Ben’s date and behaving like a couple whenever you’re in public.

It doesn’t sound too difficult, at least apart from having to pretend you’re in love with your best friend, but it’s definitely not a small lifestyle change.

Your first appearance as a “couple” is Chelsea’s annual charity gala, which most of the boys bring their wives or girlfriends to, at which you’ll be expected to wear a fancy dress and pose for photos with him and generally behave like Ben’s girlfriend.

You’ve gone on some nice holidays and been to some fancy restaurants with Ben over the years, but this is different. That much is clear when you get to Ben’s after work on Friday to get ready for the gala he’s taking you to and find racks and racks of designer gowns in his living room.

“What’s all this?” you ask as your eyes scan the dozens of shimmering dresses.

“Oh, my stylist sent them over for you,” Ben shrugs. “I know you said you had a dress, but feel free to pick one of these if you want. It’s on me, obviously.”

The dress you were going to wear is nothing compared to any of these, but you figure if you’re going to be a believable football WAG you need to dress the part.

“You know, I really don’t like you spending money on me,” you sigh.

“I know,” Ben chuckles - you’ve made that quite clear over the years. “But you’re giving up your Friday night to go to a stupid posh gala with me that I know you’ll hate, so let me buy you a stupid posh dress.”

“Fine,” you smile, standing on your tiptoes to quickly peck his cheek before going to browse your options.

After selecting a dress, you head upstairs to get ready in the guest bedroom that’s yours whenever you crash here.

You take your time doing your hair and makeup before slipping into the shiny silver gown you picked out. It’s made out of a silky material and there’s a slit up the leg, but it’s still modest enough for the gala. You trust that Ben’s stylist would’ve picked clothing suitable for the event, even though it’s fancier than anything you would typically wear.

Just as you’re struggling with the zipper at the back, there’s a knock on the door accompanied by Ben’s voice asking if you’re ready.

“Yeah, can you zip me up?” you shout back, giving him permission to enter.

As Ben walks in, you turn to face him, taking in the rare sight of him in a suit. The traditional black suit he has on is perfectly tailored and, you have to admit, he cleans up nice.

He blinks a couple times at the sight of you, his eyes scanning the gown you picked out.

“What is it?” you ask, suddenly feeling a bit insecure. “Is the dress alright?”

“What?” Ben asks, seeming a bit dazed for a moment. “Oh, um, yeah! No, it’s great. You look great. I’m just so used to seeing you in scrubs or joggers.”

You smirk, crossing your arms. “That’s a nice way to call me a slob.”

“I’m trying to compliment you, dummy,” Ben replies, rolling his eyes as he walks over to you.

You turn around so he finish doing up the dress, which he does quickly and easily. You try not to think about how many girls’ dresses he’s helped zip up, and how many more he’s taken off.

“Alright,” Ben says, gently patting your arm as he finishes. “Good to go? The car’s waiting out front.”

“Yep, ready.”

You slip on the shoes that accompany the dress, a similar shade of silver, and grip onto the railing as you descend Ben’s spiral staircase in the slightly precarious heels.

You both climb into the back of the sleek SUV waiting out front to take you to the hotel in Chelsea where the gala is being held. Your nerves begin to settle in on the drive as you realize that this is actually happening, and you’re going to have to put on a show in front of hundreds of people and cameras in just a few minutes.

“Hey, you okay?” Ben asks, looking up from his phone with a concerned gaze in your direction.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” you say with a forced smile. He obviously doesn’t believe you - he knows you too well for that - and continues to glare at you, waiting for the truth. “I just…do you really think this is believable?”

Ben frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Like, us as a couple,” you sigh. “I mean, how many footballers do you know that are dating a nurse? Or anyone that isn’t a size zero model for that matter?”

You both know it’s unlike you to talk yourself down, as you’re generally fairly confident, but you can’t help but feel insecure about walking into a room filled with beautiful women who are a lot more comfortable in this world than you are.

Ben, to his credit, looks genuinely appalled.

“Hey, don’t talk about my best friend like that,” he jests, poking you in the ribs. “You look amazing. They’ll all be wondering how I landed you, not the other way around.”

You can’t help but blush a bit, shoving Ben’s chest lightly.

“Save it for the cameras, Benji,” you say with a slight eye roll, though your smile betrays you.

He grimaces slightly at the nickname that he hates but begrudgingly allows you and only you to call him.

“Also, let’s be honest, you save lives for a living and I kick a ball around,” he points out. “The whole point of this is that you’re helping my image, remember?”

“That’s true, I guess I am out of your league,” you tease, making Ben stick his tongue out at you like he would when you were kids.

You pull up to the hotel soon after, and you brace yourself as the driver opens the door for you. The flashing lights of the cameras are blinding the moment you’re exposed to them, making you squint slightly.

Ben steps out first before offering you a hand to help you out of the car, waiting until your feet are securely on the ground before letting go.

“You ready?” he asks, gesturing with his head to the red carpet that awaits you.

You glance over at the carpet, which is lined with more paparazzi. Thankfully, you recognize some of Ben’s teammates immediately, which makes you feel a bit more at ease.

“Yeah,” you nod, taking Ben’s outstretched arm.

As you make your way into the carpet, you can feel your heart racing. The paps are calling out Ben’s name, wanting him to look in their direction, and it’s all a bit overwhelming.

Your train of thought is immediately paused as Ben slides his arm around your waist, settling it low on your hip. It’s much more intimate than any way he’s touched you before, but Shreya’s words from your meeting a few days prior echo in your mind.

You need to act like a couple. It needs to seem natural.

It definitely feels a bit strange having your friend touch you like this, but once you’re over the initial surprise, you actually find Ben’s arm around you to be incredibly grounding. You lean into his touch as you smile for the cameras, trying to look the part of the supportive girlfriend.

“You’re doing great,” Ben murmurs softly in your ear. “Almost done.”

You pose for a few more photos before he leads you toward the entrance. You know you’ll have to keep up appearances for the rest of the evening, but you’re glad the most public part of it is over.

As you enter the stunning ballroom, filled with many familiar faces of Chelsea’s players and staff, Ben’s arm remains around your waist.

“So, who here actually knows about our…arrangement?” you ask quietly as you move through the room.

You had both already informed your close friends and family about the situation to avoid any confused texts when the photos of you and Ben acting as a couple made their way online.

You know Ben told his best mates, like Tom, Harvey, Anish, Madders, and obviously Mason, who had come to be a close friend of yours over the years he and Ben were together at Chelsea too. You just aren’t sure if he told anyone at the club.

“Just Reece,” Ben says. “He asked if I was bringing a date and I figured since he knows you, it would make sense to tell him the truth.”

While you’re friendly with a lot of Ben’s teammates, you haven’t spent much time with most of them and they likely don’t know the extent of your friendship with Ben and wouldn’t bat an eye at the two of you now “dating.” You’ve known Reece for years, though, and he would definitely be confused by this sudden change.

“Okay,” you murmur, “so we have to act like a couple all night, basically?”

“Basically,” Ben says with a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry, I know it’s weird. But we don’t really have to do anything special, I’ll just tell people you’re my girlfriend if anyone asks.”

“Oh, so we don’t have to go up on the stage and make out?” you mutter sarcastically. “What a relief.”

Ben chuckles and nudges you in the arm.

“I think no kissing is probably a good ground rule,” Ben suggests. “Sorry if the touching and stuff out there was too much.”

“No, it’s fine, if we’re gonna do this we have to sell it,” you shrug. “But I agree, there’s no amount of money you could possibly earn from improving your brand that would be worth kissing you. It’s too gross.”

Ben rolls his eyes. “Could you at least lower your voice? Don’t really need people hearing my girlfriend say kissing me is gross.“

You laugh as Ben grabs two champagne flutes from a server and passes you one, which you clink against his before taking a sip. You definitely need some alcohol to get through this whole evening of pretending to be Ben’s girlfriend.

As you find your seats, you’re relieved to see that you’re sitting with Reece and his girlfriend Mia, meaning you won’t have to talk about your fake relationship all through dinner.

“Hey, it’s the happy couple,” Reece jokes as Ben pulls out a chair for you to sit next to Mia. “You look nice, Y/N.“

“Thanks, Reece,” you say as you hug Mia. “It’s nice to see you guys. This event is way too posh for me.”

“I know how you feel,” Mia smiles. “It felt weird the first time I came to one of these. And obviously it’s even weirder for you, with this whole…situation.”

“Yeah,” Reece says, lowering his voice a bit to ensure only the three of you can hear. “How the hell did Chilly get you to agree to this? Does he have blackmail on you or something?”

“Well, I do have some pretty embarrassing drunken Snapchat videos-“ Ben begins to say, but your glare cuts him off and he shakes his head and laughs. “Nah, mate. She’s just the fucking best.”

Your heart skips a beat at that, but you don’t have too much time to think about why before Ben and Reece have changed the subject to football.

A photographer comes around to take photos of each table, and Ben rests his arm on the back of your chair and leaves it there afterward as the four of you continue to chat.

Ben and Reece eventually go to get you guys another round of drinks before the entertainment begins - though the boys will have to stick to water for the rest of the night unless they want to hear about it from Poch at training on Monday.

“You know, you two actually make a convincing couple,” Mia says with a wink when you two are alone at the table.

“Yeah, right,” you chuckle, fiddling with a cocktail napkin. “I’m glad you think it’s believable, though. The sooner we improve Ben’s image, the sooner we can stop doing this.”

Mia nods, though she still looks a bit uncertain. “Right, well, he owes you big time. There’s a lot of scrutiny that comes with being in the public eye. You’ll be taking on all the risk of dating a footballer without any of the reward. That’s really generous of you.”

Honestly, you hadn’t thought too much about how all of this might impact you. You just knew that Ben needed your help.

Although you’re a bit tempted to check Twitter and see if people have already begun to talk about you, you decide you’ll deal with that later and just try to enjoy your evening for now.

Your anxieties do ease significantly when Ben returns to the table with your favourite drink in hand and a smile on his face.

“You good?” he asks softly, leaning in close so only you can hear.

You nod, returning his smile. “Just a bit nervous still.”

“You’re doing amazing,” Ben says sincerely. “But I know this isn’t how you would want to spend your Friday night, so thank you.”

“For the millionth time, it’s no big deal,” you insist. “This isn’t so bad, anyways. I’m just overthinking everything like always.”

“Well, I want you to tell me if any of this gets to be too much, at any point, and that’ll be the end of it,” he says firmly. “Okay?“

You nod, meeting his soft gaze and feeling your worries melt away even more.

“Okay.”

As the lights dim and the musical entertainment for the evening begins, Ben’s arm once again finds its way to the back of your chair and his hand loosely plays with a strand of your hair.

It’s too dark for anyone but you to notice, but for some reason, you don’t bother pointing that out to him.

A/N: let me know what you think so far! hoping to have the next chap out soon :)

tag list: @lunamelona @kathb59 @captainwans​ @amandaaa1025 @bbygrlllllll (let me know if you would like to be added!)

[yanderes-galore]

Panther’s Yandere prompts for Yandere Deku for 5.) "Manipulation? No, dear, I'm just encouraging you!" maybe Deku got the reader corned and wont let her leave till she accepts his confession (maybe he also guilt trips her but she still refuses ?)💗(also no worries , and remember to take your time and drink plenty of water )

Alright! Sorry the plot wasn't exactly what you wanted but I wanted to do a pro hero AU. Aged up as usual.

Yandere! Izuku Midoriya Prompt 5

"Manipulation? No, dear, I'm just encouraging you!"

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Delusional behavior, Manipulation, Forceful behavior, Deku not handling rejection.

Izuku is a determined man. Even when you two were in high school, he was convinced you two would be dating someday in the future. So convinced that he kept going out of his way to charm you into loving him. He just couldn’t understand such thoughts were not meant to be.

When you two were in U.A. together, you were used to the nervous boy who followed you around like a puppy. Many of your friends joked that he had a crush on you… although it soon came to light that Izuku was being truthful. He truly did have a massive crush on you.

He hid it from you for the most part. He loaded notebooks all about you, remembered your class schedule, and sent you secret admirer letters all the time, however. No wonder he got caught so easily because he was so eager to share his feelings with you.

You didn’t mind Izuku. He was a soon-to-be hero with ambition and you respected him. You just felt life was too chaotic to get so involved with him. Even when he asked you out before graduation….

“Do you plan on going pro too, (Y/N)?”

“Well, I think I’ll stick to civilian life. I’ll be there when others need me… but going pro feels a bit too stressful to me.”

“I see… that’s fine! That just means we… won’t see each other as often-”

“It’ll be okay, Izuku. I trust you, as All Might’s successor, to protect everyone even if I can’t be there to help. Just don’t forget to visit.”

“Actually, (Y/N)-”

“Yeah…?”

“I was wondering… if you’d go out with me. N-Nothing too big! I just… I just feel I should try to express my feelings for you before we part our ways.”

“Oh, Deku….”

It was a pain for both of you to turn him down. Part of you thought it would be a wonderful chance but hero life would be stressful for the both of you. You turned him down not because you didn’t like him, but because you wanted the best for both of you.

Deku on the other hand, was crushed. You tried to explain your reasoning and he acted like he understood. Although… The hero could not let go of his feelings so easily. You thought when you graduated, you’d never see each other again. 

It turns out you were wrong. 

You saw Izuku everywhere on TV once he went pro. Everyone praised him for being All Might’s successor, and for being himself. They praised his smile and how he went out of his way to help people. It was nice to see he was doing well in your mind. Meanwhile you were relaxing at home, having grabbed a small job to make ends meet. It was less dangerous than hero work.

Since Izuku went pro, you expected he would have no time to see you. Probably a good thing you never accepted the relationship. Plus, who went to visit all of their high school friends after school ended anyways? You didn't think you were that high on the priority list. 

Imagine your surprise when Deku himself knocks on your door, smiling brightly when he sees you.

“You said to visit you, right?”

You’re both now adults, you nearly forgot that he had the hugest crush on you in school. You both had gone to different paths in life but from what you knew, were happy.

You decided to not go pro and instead live a quiet little life, getting by enough to stay happy. Izuku went pro and achieved his dream, giving bright smiles on TV and saving people’s lives. You’d think he’d be happy too.

Not as happy as he would’ve liked, it seems.

You two caught up, talking about how life went. Although you noticed how Izuku’s tone shifted as he looked at you. Was he upset about something?

“Are you doing okay, Deku?”

His face heats up at the affectionate nickname you give him, looking away from you. Even as an adult and a star he still manages to get bashful and shy. You still had an effect on him to this day. 

“...Remember when I asked you out?”

You smile and laugh softly, embarrassment flooding through you at the memory.

“Yeah… I still think it’s for the best that we decided against it. You’re so busy now.”

“But I’m not happy….”

“Huh?”

“I’ve always thought of that day since I became a pro. I think I would’ve been happier as a hero… if you were there to support me.”

“Deku… I didn’t know I made you feel that way.”

“(Y/N)... I want to try again.”

Izuku smiles at you, cheeks tinted a light pink while he looks at you hopefully.

“I’m not busy, and I can tell you aren’t either! We… We can try it now, right?”

“Izuku… no, I can’t-”

“Why not!?” The pro hero panics, scared to have his heart broken again.

“I can’t bring myself to feel the same, Deku-”

“But think about it! I can provide for you, I’ll promise to visit you often, are you scared of all the cameras? I can ask them to tone it down around you-”

“Izuku.”

You snap him out of his rambling and sigh.

“I just don’t feel the same.”

He looks to be on the verge of tears at this. He’s been waiting to ask you again for years…. You have to feel the same! He loves you too much to just… let you go.

“Just one date…” He sniffles. “I promise I’ll be good for you! I’ve been studying the things you like and asking around to try and visit you and-”

“Izuku… What the hell are you talking about?” You narrow your eyes. “Don’t manipulate me into this, this should’ve ended years ago.”

"Manipulation? No, dear, I'm just encouraging you!" Izuku cries, standing up from his spot. You watch him, glaring at him before gesturing to the door.

“Can it, Izuku. I don't want to talk about this. Everyone confesses, many get rejected, end of story. No need to be so obsessive-”

Izuku grabs your hand, looking at you longingly. You’re now the one panicking now. You've seen what his power does, both in high school and on TV.

“N-No… please. I can't sleep when I think of you. I only ask for you to accept me once… t-then I’ll leave you alone, okay?”

“You’re manipulative and forceful…”

“I don’t mean to be!”

“Let me go.” 

“(Y/N), please!”

“I mean it…!”

Izuku reluctantly lets you go. You pull away and take a deep breath. Never meet your heroes, right?

“(Y/N)....”

“Leave my home, I gave you my decision.”

Izuku frowns but nods softly.

“I’m sorry….”

“I don’t care.”

Izuku looks at you one last time before leaving your home dejectedly. He was too caught up in his delusions to consider how you felt. Even now, however, he can't shake the thought of you from his mind.

While you calm down and continue with your normal life, Izuku watches you from a window. Perhaps he rushed things… he needed to be more careful next time.

Izuku was determined to have you fall for him someday. Every time he smiles on TV, everytime he gets interviewed and asked questions, every time he saves people… he does it while thinking of you. You are so very special to him… even if he’s forceful about it.

He’ll have you give him a chance someday…

He just needs to be patient and not ruin it like he did this time.

[bethelighthalazia]

9 makes 1 team!

Bandmates (Relationships with the members)

Summary:  What if ATEEZ had debuted with one more member? What if they had debuted with a young woman? Her name is Choi Hwa Young, younger sister of Choi Jongho.

Genre: n/a

Pairing: ot8 & fem!OC Choi Hwa Young

Word Count:  n/a

Warnings: n/a

networks: @mirohs-aurora-society

back to masterlist

© by bethelighthalazia. Do not repost, copy or translate. Unless stated otherwise, those works are mine and born from my own ideas. I don't have any claim on the mentioned real existing Idols whatsoever.

Group Info

They´re best friends, almost like found family for her, but Hwa has a huge crush on Mingi, Mingi has a big crush on Hwa, Yunho knows about it without Mingi even telling him, but he doesn't tell anyone

The boys are very protective of Hwa, often a bit too overprotective

The boys know about Hwa´s insecurities, fears and especially about her allergies and always make sure to keep her safe

It's often Wooyoung and Hwa who cook for the group

since Hwa always loses her lip balm and the others find these, they have a big collection of Hwa´s lip balms in almost every room

when she's upset or mad, the boys actually get scared of her sometimes

The boys take turns looking for Hwa when she gets lost, often even playing rock, paper, scissors to determine who has “Hwa duty”

there were many arguments about Hwa´s stage outfits being too revealing in the beginning, which none of the boys let happen; after kingdom though, they still tried, but Hwa now has a word in her outfit choice as well

When Hwa is out with friends, the boys tend to be in contact with said friends, or send some texts to check up on the girl

Most of the times, it's Seonghwa or Hongjoong who try to make her behave and stay calm, but soon give up (especially when Woo or San are involved as well)

Seonghwa (Park Seong Hwa (박성화)) (Oppa)

Tends to mother her quite often, which Hwa never complains about. She loves to ask her oppa for advice, since he usually is the most mature and calm one. He and Hwa are sometimes called by the same nickname, which confuses her quite often. When she needs comfort, Seonghwa is usually the first one she goes to. He’s like her big brother and is rather protective, especially when other male idols or fans are around her. Seonghwa often calls her ‘little one’, unless he's mad at her, then he uses her full name.

Hongjoong (Kim Hong Joong (김홍중)) (Oppa)

Hwa loves to annoy him, he's the main target of her teasing and pranks, but she also trusts him and, if Seonghwa is not nearby, she asks him for advice and help. Cuddles and hugs are exchanged, but more often when no cameras are around since Hongjoong doesn't want to potentially give material for scandals that could be harmful for her, plus he's quite shy of affectionate skinship in public. Hongjoong is the one who has to find her everytime they attend an event, because she tends to wander off and get lost. His nickname for her is shorty, since she's the only member who's shorter than him.

Yunho (Jeong Yun Ho ((정윤호)) (Oppa)

Yunho is her big teddy bear. She loves to hug and cuddle him, holding hands when she walks besides him is almost mandatory. He's like a big brother to her, and he takes this trust and responsibility very seriously. His nickname for her is tiny, mainly because of their height difference. Hwa often likes to tease him with pranks, but more than that, she loves to team up with him to prank the others. Piggyback rides are also often a given, especially when they're in a crowd and they don´t want to lose her in it (again…). Her nickname for him is YuYu.

Yeosang (Kang Yeo Sang (강여상)) (Oppa)

Yeosang´s favorite activity is to brush and style Hwa´s hair. He's the only one who can make her sit still for hours. When they sit next to each other, he usually either draws patterns on her palms or caresses her arm to keep her calm. Hwa likes to join him when he watches tv or reads, often she can be caught styling or just brushing his hair in such moments. Yeosang and Hwa are both very different personalities, but still quite similar. His nickname for her is Bun (since she was called Bun Bun once in a show, he calls her that ever since because it causes her to get all shy and blushy). 

San (Choi San (최산)) (Oppa)

In the beginning, San wasn't too fond of the idea of having a female member in the group, but they quickly became best friends. If she's scared, he is at her side to protect her without even needing to be asked to. He likes to carry her around piggyback style, if he's not around Wooyoung, he can be found hugging and cuddling Hwa. San usually matches her energy, especially when she´s not holding back her naturally chaotic and often child-like energy. Hwa usually calls him San oppa or Sannie, when she calls him San, she's usually mad at him. San tends to call her gwiyomi (cutie).

Mingi (Song Min Gi (송민기)) (Oppa)

Mingi is the first to notice when Hwa feels anxious or sad and he can always tell if she's honest or if she's lying to them. Ever since the group formed, Mingi has liked her and has had a crush on her. Hwa trusts Mingi blindly, she knows he always will keep her safe and never will do anything to hurt her purposefully. She´s always had/has a crush on him. His nickname for her is princess/pretty, which causes her to get heavily flustered. Mingi also often just holds her hand or can be found hugging or cuddling her, often giving her piggyback rides as well. Hwa likes to call him Min-Min, but only when she knows that no cameras are around.

Wooyoung (Jung Woo Young (정우영)) (Oppa)

Wooyoung and Hwa are a bundle of pure chaos. If one doesn't see them, one certainly can hear them. These two absolutely match each other´s energy and it´s happened more than once, that Seonghwa or Hongjoong had to separate them to calm down. They both can often be found dancing (or causing trouble for the older members). Wooyoung and Hwa became best friends after she beat him in a dance off that he had proposed to prove that a girl shouldn't be in the group (he only lost because Yunho had distracted Wooyoung during that dance off). Hwa mispronounced his name in the beginning quite often, which is why she resorted to calling him Woo everytime (yes, also in interviews and such). His nickname for her is jagi.

Jongho (Choi Jong Ho (최종호)) (big brother, blood related)

Much to his annoyance, Hwa loves to call him little bear, even though she's younger and shorter than him. Jongho however usually calls her Hwa-yah or, much to her annoyance, moonpie. He started calling her this when he walked in on her binge-watching Sailor moon (while she was dressed in a sailor moon costume). Jongho doesn´t often show affection on camera, yet he does allow Hwa to cuddle or hug him any time she likes. They are quite close and he loves to join her vocal practices every time, mainly to give her advice and sometimes even get advice from her.

taglist: @mingis-mizu,@tinyelfperson

(if you want to be added to a taglist, follow the taglist-link in my pinned post)

[temmtamm]

⚡︎ROTTMNT GROUP ROMANTIC HCS⚡︎

(Requests open and welcomed)

~ᥫ᭡MIKEYᥫ᭡~

Definitely the most affectionate

Loves involving his S/O into his daily life in any way possible

Like, if the boys are playing video games or going somewhere he's quick to invite you

Can get suffocating at times but if you remind him that you need space, he'll give it to you- albeit for a short period of time

He loves spontaneous acts of affection such as sudden showing up to your home or the reverse as well as surprises, gifts, and even just surprise cuddles.

His favorite thing to do with you is sleepovers where you two can watch can stacking videos together and eat snacks.

I like to think he'd try and recreate some of chef "Meat Sweats" meals for you as gifts.

He also might like to draw for you since he is a bit of an artist.

He really loves you with his whole heart and tries his best to show it with his actions.

~✰DONNIE✰~

The least likely to show his love through affection.

Not that he hates it, he just sometimes forgets it or isn't in the mood.

Has a bit of an ego and tries to make over the top inventions to have you feed into it and praise him.

Speaking of praise, He absolutely goes crazy when you give him some.

He thinks he's the smartest alive so to have someone agree with him on that makes him feel on top of the world.

He can also be a bit selfish and can often forget to treat you like a lover instead of a friend so he might need a bit of talking to.

He is extremely jealous though, so when you start hanging out with his brothers or someone else while he's busy, He'll most likely put his work on pause to finally give you attention.

When you two actually do romantic stuff together such as dates he likes to go all out for it. Hes a bit of a perfectionist so he likes it when his plans go amazingly. This usually means he'll take you to a fancy restaurant or for a stroll to the finest parts of town.

He can freak out at the slightest thing going wrong though so sometimes it's better if you end up being the one to plan the dates.

Will make tiny little bots like S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. for you and your everyday life to make it just a bit easier on you.

Even though you have to take the initiative a lot, he loves you dearly and is trying to be better about showing it.

~𖤓RALPH𖤓~

PDA all the way, baby!!

Loves to spar with you if/when you are willing too, though he tends to go a bit softer on you than he does with his brothers

If you have stuffed animals they have to be turned away from you two before you guys cuddle.

He thinks that you are the coolest person alive and are practically invincible.

Very protective over you if you join him when they battle mutants.

Can be a bit clingy, but for the most part he is very chill.

Yknow that golden retriever boyfriend meme? He's pretty much that to a T.

The kindest person you will ever meet, even if he can be a bit of an airhead

he's very lively and can't stay in one spot for long so he absolutely loves to take you on dates 24-7

~❀LEO❀~

Loves bragging about you to the others

He throws "I love you" out constantly, not because it lacks meaning to him but because he likes to remind you in case you forgot

Like Donnie, He likes to show off his portals or tricks in exchange for your praise and support.

Will always try and teleport you to your guys's dates which mostly ends up in y'all ending up in the middle of nowhere or stuck in a different city.

Very flirty and loves to use his words to express his feelings.

Whenever he sees you out in public he likes to act like he's never seen you before and that this is his first time flirting with you.

Stuff like, "Hey, beautiful! You got a boyfriend?" Is often his go to but he sometimes likes to get creative with it.

Loves to be covered in kisses and held when y'all cuddle. He is the small spoon and I will stand by this.

Thanks for reading~

[boysborntodie]

do you think ponyboy stayed gold?

This is such a good question, thank you for asking, like I think about this all the time.

Short answer, yes.

Long answer;

Nature’s First Green is Gold: Ponyboy at the start

In the context of the poem, it ‘to be gold’ is to be pure and uncorrupted as all things are in the beginning. Yet life and time leaves changes and leaves marks on all things. Pony starts off the poem as pure and untainted, gold like the sun. Even the first line gives a subtle reference about this:

Cherry sums Pony (at the start) up best here;

It’s not fair to say Pony has gone through suffering at this point because he very much has. His parents have died, he’s often in danger because of the Socs, he has problems with Darry, he sees the suffering of his friends and knows he can’t do anything about him and the injustice of it hurts him. And he’s 14 which is rough enough without dealing with all that.

But he’s ‘not dirty’ (dirty having a double meaning here). He hasn’t been ‘tainted or corrupted’ by life yet, instead having played a passive role throughout all these events. He’s gold. But of course, nothing gold can stay.

Nothing Gold Can Stay: Ponyboy throughout the novel

The Outsiders is a coming-of-age story. It’s the story about Pony transitioning from a boy to a man. It’s about identity and belonging (the song ‘Great Expectations’ from the musical following this theme). It’s about figuring out who you are and where you fit in, which Pony especially struggles with because he’s a greaser and greasers get the short end of the stick in life. It’s about a boy is even an outsider among outsiders (as @obliqueletterkennyreference pointed out to me during one of our conversations), because he can’t fit into the standards that have been places upon greasers (he’s both heavily embedded in greaser culture yet not greaser enough. It’s about Pony realising that the status quo hurts young kids and turns them into byproducts of a system that dooms them to either perpetuate the system or succumb to it.

Throughout the novel, Johnny and Dally symbolise the two paths Pony can take; to ‘stay gold’ or ‘get tough’. And it is only after they both die is Pony forced to choose between them both.

It really seems that Pony decides that it’s better to get tough. You can’t stay soft and good, because it means you’re keeping yourself open to hurt. It means you end up like Johnny, dying too young. The world is unfair and kills off those who are good and keeps those who aren’t alive. Thus, there must be no point to being good.

And yet, Ponyboy picks up the glass so it won’t hurt anyone. He decides that the only reason someone should ever use violence is in self-defence and that Johnny is right to reject violence. He becomes more understanding towards others like Randy, Bob and Darry.

And when he reads Johnny’s letter, he realises how prevalent the issue of this systemic abuse, violence and oppression is and how it hurts all those involved and that it cannot be left as it is (i kinda talk about this here). Not only does he reject this but he takes an active role, different from all the other characters who recognise these issues yet accept them as a part of life and never challenge it, by writing the Outsiders.

And thus he decides to

Holding onto the Hardest Hue: Will Ponyboy Stay Gold?

‘Staying Gold’ basically means for Pony to stay soft and true to himself, to not close himself from the world’s good just to steer clear of its bad and harm, to always choose to do good and be kind. To continue loving the world and appreciating its good and beauty.

The poem itself states: ‘(nature’s first green is) the hardest hue to hold’. And I think that inplies that staying gold will not be easily for Pony. Being gold is no longer his inherent nature; it’s a choice he has to make. It won’t be easy to stay gold. We see Pony internalise that ‘being tough keeps you from getting hurt’ and Dally isn’t entirely wrong.

But as Soda says, ending up like Dally is no way to be. To constantly be fighting and to harden yourself from any good. You can argue it’s not even possible because even though Dally says he doesn’t let anything affect him or care for anyone, he loved Johnny and Johnny’s death was what drove him into aggravating the police and killing him.

I think there may be a lot of back and forth for Pony. Growing and regressing and failing and getting up to try again and persisting. And he has the potential to get worse, to become tough and hardened. But it’s thematically important for Ponyboy to choose against it and staying gold, no matter how hard it can get.

And I’d say that this passage does imply that Pony will eventually get away from their town, the way Johnny, Dally and many others don’t.