#such devastation! this was not my intention!

[faemingi]

𓇢𓆸 solace in us

ateez! song mingi x reader ᡣ𐭩

summary; your boyfriend comforts you thru health concerns and fertility issues

pairing; song mingi x afab!reader

word count; 2.2k

tags; comfort, fluff, grief

trigger warnings; infertility, reproductive illness !!

notes; personal to me — ♡

ᡣ𐭩

my dream had always been to be a mother.

and after meeting mingi, that desire grew into an aching need. the thought of us blossoming into such a testament of our love as that filled me with not only joy for my own dream, but euphoria at the thought of getting to be the person who makes him a father. he was young, i was young, but i had never met anyone with as much love to give as he did, and i felt in my heart that he could and would be the best parent.

he was aware that i was no longer on any form of contraceptive, and while we weren’t purposefully trying to conceive, we weren’t actively trying to prevent it. it wasn’t really a thought for either of us, and the way we were intimate was never careless nor with the sole intent to get pregnant. but we both shared the idea that we wanted a family together in the future, and my greatest hope was that i would be able to surprise him with the news that he was going to be a father.

i sat beside him on my couch, my chin resting against my knees as my thighs were brought up to my chest. he was sleepily watching the movie we’d put on an hour prior, but my drowsy eyes could only focus on him. he was unaware of my staring at him, and i giggled quietly, causing his attention to turn to me.

“what?” he asked, blissfully ignorant to the fact that i hadn’t been paying a bit of attention to the TV. his bare, clear skin without makeup adorning his eyelids, playful concern spreading across his face as i struggled to answer. i shook my head, unsure of why the bliss i felt was causing me to laugh.

“i just love you,” i said softly.

his bashfulness caused the soft pink of his cheeks to darken, while i knew he wasn’t shy about his affection, but just flustered when i professed my adoration for him unprompted. he reached out, pulling me against him, and i snuggled closer into his chest. his scent was so comforting, welcoming, him. i hated the way that his presence made me sleepy from how safe i felt, because i wanted nothing more than to stay awake 24/7 showering him with kisses and praise.

he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “i love you more than anything.” another kiss, his lips against my hair longer this time. “anything.”

we fell asleep on the couch that night.

•

the next day, i was sat on the bathroom floor. i was struggling to keep quiet, but devastation was debilitating me, and stifling my sobs was becoming more and more difficult by the second. mingi was still here at my apartment, but he was in the other room, and in his usual fashion i knew he was waiting patiently impatient for me to return.

it was the fourth time my late period came with not one, but two negative pregnancy tests, and the knowledge i had of my cycle had made it almost impossible for the timing to have been wrong. i wrapped the plastic tests in toilet paper and shoved them down into the trash can, and stood up to wipe my eyes. splashing my face with cold water, wiping my nose, trying to convince myself it was okay, nothing helped. every time i felt a sliver of peace, it was broken with the reality of the circumstances. it took forever to catch my breath and gain the courage to return to mingi’s side.

when i opened the bathroom door, however, he was standing directly behind it, staring at me with a worry and fear i had never seen in his eyes before.

“what’s wrong?” he asked. “you were crying?”

i felt paralyzed, my blood frozen cold in my veins. we were both too nervous to speak.

he finally reached out, taking my hand in his. “please, please tell me.”

i didn’t want to speak, it felt as though i couldn’t. “i… i’m sorry for worrying you —”

he reached up to wipe a tear from under my eye. “talk to me. that’s what i’m here for.”

“my… my period was late,” i stuttered out. “but i took two tests and they were negative.” my voice broke at the end of my sentence. i hated that i felt so broken up over this. his love and his presence was more than enough, my happiness wasn’t reliant on being a mother.

“oh,” he pulled me into him, breathing out a sigh of relief and sadness. “baby, it’s okay.”

“no, it’s not,” i sniffed. “i feel so broken.”

“you’re not broken.” he rubbed my back and he squeezed me tighter. “you are so perfect.”

i cried into his shirt for a while longer, and as perfect as he is, he was there with me until i got through it.

•

my new doctor had ordered testing. they wouldn’t have been as concerned, if symptoms outside of not getting pregnant hadn’t also been present. bloodwork, ultrasounds, MRIs. the results were all to be discussed with my doctor at once, and i waited anxiously as the days passed before i met with her.

mingi clutched my hand, rubbing his fingers on my skin reassuringly, my knee bouncing rapidly. i had protested him being present for this appointment, yet he expressed the need to be there for me, and while he respected me immensely, i decided that his accompaniment would be beneficial in the long run. and i was right, as the news delivered by my doctor made my brain pull the parachute cord, and i was outside my body for the entirety of our conversation.

if he was upset, he masked it well, as he held my hand and took care of speaking to the doctor on my behalf. it was hard for me to cry in the presence of medical professionals, so i was frozen, the lump in my throat aching so bad i thought i might throw up. the doctor’s professionalism came across as apathetic, though the sadness in her eyes at having to share the results with me was apparent. bicornuate uterus, external endometrial adhesions, fallopian blockage, hydrosalpinx… she couldn’t fathom how the pain was tolerable for me, or how these things hadn’t been caught sooner. she was apologetic. she said she was sorry the health care system and medical industry had failed me. she said we could discuss other treatment options at a later date when i was ready. for now i was being put on a form of birth control, hormonal drug, contraceptive to help the symptoms and shrink the growths.

back in the car, mingi held me, and i cried.

•

when we returned home, my heart broke at my inability to be present for mingi, but i went straight to bed. i laid down, my blinds closed and the lights out, and covered myself with my blanket. it was cold in my apartment, beginning to rain outside, and i knew that the cool air would be a comfort as my tears burned my face.

the hum of the air conditioning overpowered the sound of footsteps, and i was startled by mingi joining me in bed.

“you don’t have to -”

“i want to,” he interrupted.

his arms slid around me from behind, pulling me close into being his little spoon, and he held me tight, resting his hand under my shirt, right on my lower belly between my hips.

as soon as his warm fingers spread across my skin, i couldn’t stop the tears. he pressed a kiss to my back, his forehead against my shoulder. “i wish i could take your pain away.”

i sniffed. “i’m glad that you don’t have to.”

his lips were warm against my skin, his voice soft and quiet. “baby, i hate to see you in pain.”

i struggled to speak. “i won’t be able to make you a father.”

i felt him take a shaky breath, and he gently grabbed my arm to turn me over and face him. he had taken so much initiative and cared for me so much in the short while that i’d been struggling, so i didn’t resist when he wanted to speak to me directly. i just didn’t want to see his face knowing i was causing him to cry.

but when i looked at him, he was giving me the saddest smile, tears welling in his eyes. “and i won’t be able to make you a mother,” he said, touching my face gently. “it’s not your fault. i wish so badly that i could give you the same.” he leaned forward to kiss my forehead. “but we have so much time and so many options.”

i felt unworthy of such love and kindness. “it makes me feel so worthless,” i said. “i knew something was wrong. i just didn’t expect it to be that bad. i didn’t expect my body to be that fucked up.”

he traced his thumb along my cheekbone to wipe a tear away. “it’s not fucked up. nothing about you is fucked up. it is not your fault.” he kissed my nose. “today, i love you more than i ever have. and there is nothing worth more than your love to me.”

•

he wasn’t in bed when i woke up the next day. i figured he had stepped out briefly for something, but i didn’t question or worry. he had a habit of leaving without waking me if he thought he’d be back before i got up for the day.

i checked the time, though, and it was almost noon. i sleep a lot when i’m sad. and i sleep so deep. i could barely keep my eyes open.

mingi held me all night, until i was able to relax. my heart still ached so heavily in my chest. but the panic was gone. i was left with exhaustion and absolute despair. it wasn’t because i felt like my purpose was to be a mother, or that my happiness relied on it, or that i was failing mingi. it was because i was sick, my body was broken, and i had a chronic disease inside of me that made my future unclear and scary.

that was the worst of it. the infertility was just the icing on that cake.

i heard the front door open, and got tense at the same time that i felt comfort from mingi’s return. he was quiet as he moved about the kitchen, his movements gentle and silent for — what i KNEW was — my sake. he would’ve parted the seas for me, had i asked.

i didn’t hear him walking towards the bedroom, yet i heard the sound of a small bell jingling, and stayed still to listen closer. it couldn’t have been his keys, but i was unsure as to what it could’ve been otherwise. i hadn’t heard a sound like it before.

just as i sat up, a little gray and white kitten with a bell hanging from her collar came running into the room.

my mouth immediately fell open in shock, throwing the blankets off of me to join the kitten on the floor. i got to my knees to get a closer look, and behind the kitten followed my sweet mingi.

i looked up at him in awe, and he grinned happily.

“you didn’t,” i said. he joined me on the floor, crossing his legs, sitting right beside me.

he lifted the kitten up and set it in my lap, and i held my hands up, unsure what to do, but the little baby curled up on my lap and stared up at me, bright blue eyes looking calm and curious.

“it’s a girl,” he said. “i had been wanting to surprise you for a while but… after yesterday, i figured it was the right time.”

“oh, mingi,” i whispered, reaching down to pet her. she immediately began purring and leaning into my touch. seeing her up close, i realized her collar was a pink bow, the little gold bell jingling quietly with every movement. i looked back at mingi. he was looking back at me with such love, but also waiting intently to hear about how i felt. “i love you so much. i don’t know what to say.”

“are you happy?” he asked, his concern for my wellbeing so endearing i wanted to melt.

i nodded, reaching out to pull him in, and kiss him softly on his lips. “i am so happy. this is the most amazing thing you could’ve done for me.” i took his face in both hands, looking him in the eyes. “i love you.” another kiss.

he laughed quietly, kissing me back.

“so many things are uncertain,” he said. “and all we can do is wait it out. but i hope that one thing you never question is how much i love you. how in love with you i am.” he reached out to pet the kitten in my lap. “and now, she can be a testament to that.”

he became engrossed in petting her, talking to her sweetly, but i couldn’t look away from him. he was so loving, and so giving, and so perfect. it would take me an infinite amount of lifetimes to ever begin to repay him and it still wouldn’t be enough. i would be forever indebted to his selfless devotion, yet all he asked for in return was my presence. my affection. my love.

and song mingi will forever own my heart. ♡

[i-gwarth]

are you kidding me? Holy shit.

Haunting. Beautiful. Incredible fucking performance. I wept. It's not just that she speaks in my native language. It's not just the mournful, desolate context of her existence as this ragged, ancient thing in a devastated 1945 Romania. It's not even the idea that she is infected with the traditional Romanian dor, a longing and melancholy so severe and all-encompassing that it will slowly burn the life out of even an immortal.

No, it's actually her voice. Diana Gheorghian does an incredible job selling it. The sadness in it, the poetic resignation of her final words, like a dirge to the undying. The way she makes you think she has hope when she is moments away from self-annihilation, as if to mock the very concept of hope in her last few seconds.

I don't know how intentional this was, but they couldn't have picked a better nationality, a better way to introduce the vampire of the Old Continent, than through a sad old Romanian bunica. Here, now, is the final and logical consequence of living forever in a world so burdened with age upon age of senseless tragedy. It's not an exuberant, roaring feast of life and pleasure. It's an emaciated, decrepit woman with an extinct family, whose sadness saturates every fiber of her being. Things can can never start again. The years will just pile upon years, misery upon misery, until all the days of the world are exhausted.

This is what Dracula himself was talking about, what he was trying to escape in moving to London. All things become Daciana, in the fullness of time. There is no joy on the Devil's road.

[themisplaceddemigod]

Hi there! Can I req PJO Apollo x Reader anything! There’s not enough Apollo fics. Just something romantic and cute! Thank you !!! <3

hi! I'd love to write more Apollo content, I also think there's too few!

pick me

PJO!Apollo x Princess!Reader

summary - you met Apollo before your father called for suitors, so you're amused when he appears before your father as a mortal, pretending to be a suitor. just for fun.

warnings - none, but not proofread

Your love of music is what drew the sun god's attention. Any moment you could, you'd either be sitting by your lyre and creating new melodies, or taking a serene walk in the palace gardens while singing. So it was no surprise when Apollo showed up one day during your walk.

As soon as you saw him, you knew instantly that he was no mortal. Power radiated off him in waves, and his body glowed with a faint golden light.

"So which one are you then?" You asked him, raising an eyebrow.

The god was visibly taken aback, "Which one am- the handsomest one, obviously!" He puffed out his chest proudly.

"I see...so Lord Poseidon? Though I've heard he usually shows up as an older man with darker hair and greener eyes." The mischievous twinkle in your eye revealed your devious intentions.

Apollo chuckled, relaxed now that he knew you were messing with him, "I assure you, I am so much better looking than my uncle."

"I'd love to agree, but I don't want to die."

Another laugh from the sun god, "As long as I'm here, I promise you no harm will come to you." He stepped closer to you, following you along the path lined with rose bushes.

A blush rose to your cheeks, and you cast your gaze to the blooming flowers, "May I ask what your business with me is, Lord Apollo?"

"Please, call me Apollo. And that's simple; I'm here to court you."

-

Apollo was a fun, spontaneous and affectionate lover. He would often just appear in your bedroom and sweep you off for a date, more so than he would actually plan one. He spent time teaching you how to play different instruments, and often liked to lay his head on your lap while listening to you play or even sing.

He gifted you all sorts of things, but usually called himself your best gift which you couldn't deny. Kisses with him were either slow and sweet, or passionate and fiery depending on his mood. He was also a cuddler, something you learned when you woke up in his arms one morning after falling asleep out of them.

The time you spent with him made you happier than anything else, and you found yourself falling in love. You didn't want anyone but him, because no one would be able to make you feel the way he made you feel.

The news that your father was looking for potential husbands for you reached your kingdom and others before it reached your ears. You were devastated, your relationship with Apollo at the forefront of your mind.

Panic filled you as you rushed to your usual meeting place with the god, fear of what he would think clouding your mind. You'd been enjoying being romanced by him, you didn't want to lose it.

"Apollo-"

"I know," he interrupted you calmly, before smiling and greeting you like usual. A hug and a sweet, slow kiss followed by a forehead peck.

"You're not upset?" You frowned.

He let out a loud laugh, pulling you close to rest against his chest, "I'm a god, love, I have nothing to fear from mortal competition." Then, before you spoke, "But if your father wants a proposal from a mortal suitor, I can comply."

"What do you mean by that?" You asked, nervously eyeing him.

He just smiled and kissed you again, "You'll see."

-

The day of the ball your father had arranged to find a husband for you came faster than you'd anticipated, and as you got ready in your room with your handmaidens, you couldn't help but feel nervous.

What if he didn't show up? What if your father chose another suitor before he arrives? What if your father rejected his proposal?

"Something wrong, princess?" One of your handmaidens asked, a soft and understanding look on her face. She was always close to you, and knew how much you didn't want this.

"No, nothing," you forced a smile, "Just wondering who's down there."

"The finest princes in all the land, I'm sure," she put the finishing touches before stepping away. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," you smiled at her again, this time genuine.

When you reached the top of the last flight of stairs that led down into the ballroom, your heart almost stopped at the sight of dozens of princes and noblemen from all over milling about.

Then your eyes met a set of electric blue ones, and all your nerves faded away as your body relaxed. You descended the stairs and greeted every suitor as you passed, their compliments not bringing you as much joy as Apollo's did.

You were heading towards the god - who had made good on his promise and looked mortal, dressed in princely attire and significantly less godly features - but still striking.

"(Name)!" Your father called cheerfully, "Come meet Prince (Random Name)! He's from our neighbouring kingdom!"

You didn't really want to, but you walked over and offered the young prince the best smile you could muster. Which was pretty convincing, because you'd had practice.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, my lady," the prince smiled back and lifted your hand, kissing your knuckles. "You truly are the jewel of this kingdom."

As you laughed and played shy in response to his comment, Apollo was watching the exchange irritably. After a few more minutes he couldn't stand it, and walked over to your small group with the intention of stealing you away.

"Excuse me," he politely interrupted the conversation, "May I ask the beautiful princess for a dance?"

"Yes," you answered, a little too eagerly.

Apollo just smiled and took your hand, leading you to the middle of the ballroom where the older couples were dancing slowly. As the two of you joined them, you sighed in relief.

"I was wondering when you were going to come over."

"Maybe I just wanted to give him false hope," the sun god teased, his eyes once again enchanting you beyond words.

"You're still so handsome," you blushed, "What if they suspect-"

"Even if they do," Apollo twirled you around and then pulled you back, so now his chest was pressing against your back. "What can they do? Refusing a god would have terrible consequences."

"Mhm, I guess you're right," you relaxed again, butterflies blooming in your stomach as the two of you swayed side to side in this position.

"Always am."

He did have to let you go, however, as your father insisted you dance with a few of the princes as well just so you could be sure. None of them interested you, none of them attracted you and none of them entertained you the way the sun god did.

The entire time you danced and listened to their boring tales, you locked eyes with Apollo across the room. He was silently laughing at your predicament, amused that you were suffering so and smug that you had eyes for no one but him.

And then your father struck up a conversation with him, seeing how you were so interested in him, and this time it was your turn to be amused as you watched the Olympian try his best to maintain a mortal appearance both physically and through his words.

It was quite funny seeing him like this, pretending to be another suitor interested in marrying you.

Towards the end of the ball, you took to your throne - beside your father's in exhaustion. You'd danced with nearly every prince there and your feet were killing you.

"See anyone you like yet?" Your father asked as he sat down next to you in his own throne.

"Well, actually-" You began, only to be cut off.

"I would like to ask for the princess's hand in marriage," a voice cut you off, and you both turned to see Apollo approaching.

You tried to stifle your giggle, especially when he winked at you. Keeping a straight face was difficult, but you managed as your father eyed Apollo.

"What kingdom are you from again?"

"Olympus."

You choked when he said that, your eyes going wide. The two men turned to you, concerned, but you waved their worry off.

"Did you just say-"

"Mount Olympus?" The sun god repeated, "Yes I did." And then he changed, assuming the form he liked the appear in when interacting with mortals - the same one you were used to seeing.

Your father instantly bowed his head, "Lord Apollo! I-I didn't know you were among us tonight!"

"I was trying to keep it that way," Apollo replied, suddenly approaching you, "But then I figured, what king would refuse a god?"

He held his hand out to you, and you took it as a deep blush fell over your cheeks. Your father's gaze moved to your intertwined hands as you moved close to the god, that familiar feeling he gave you washing over you and making you shy and flustered.

"My daughter?" Your father asked in shock.

"She's quite the gifted musician," the sun god praised, "And she's got a pretty voice. But more than that, she didn't even recognise me!"

Your father's face paled, "My lord, I'm so-"

"Well she actually did, but she pretended not to. Which was cute, actually." Apollo did not shy away from the details of your meeting, and he basically told your father your entire relationship story. "But this was fun! Unfortunately, she and I will be going now."

Before your father could protest, he'd taken you to your favourite spot. At the look on your face, he chuckled.

"That was fun, wasn't it? Now he'll get off your back about marriage."

"You-you just-" You were too stunned, still blushing profusely.

"Improvised that last part?" He finished for you. "Mhm. Your reaction was worth it, I can't believe you choked!"

"Apollo!"

He just laughed and wrapped his arms around you, smiling and gazing into your eyes lovingly with his dazzling ones. You shied away from his gaze, but he tilted your chin up so you could look at him.

And then he kissed you, even slower and sweeter than usual, holding you against him intimately.

And for the first time since Daphne and Hyacinthus, he was in love.

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Drugged Hero Whumpee used as Party Favor at Villain's Party part 4

Warnings: drugged sedation, torture, blood, severe whump/intimate whump, restraints

Archenemy patted Shadow's cheek condescendingly. "Looks like you're in over your head!" He teased mockingly, voice laced with hate and hidden danger.

"...Pick... a hell... and rot there..." Shadow croaked, her voice no more than a choked rasp of air.

Archenemy smiled, a cruel type of smile that had a razor-sharp edge to it, as his hand moved to stroke her neck, lingering on her terrified, racing pulse. "Tough words for someone so... scared," he taunted.

Shadow's whole body trembled with pain, and if she weren't in so much agony she would have loved nothing more than to crush the man's face in.

"What... do you want...?" Shadow wheezed uselessly.

Archenemy leaned over her, voice dropping to a dangerous whisper that no one else could hear. "You know exactly what I want," he rumbled, chest vibrating.

He was right. Shadow DID know what he wanted. He'd been chasing after a powerful secret for years that would give him similar abilities to Shadow herself, and she had foiled him at every turn. "...You'll never... get that..." She hissed through gritted teeth.

"Oh, you know me better than that. I have all the right ways to get what I want in the end," Archenemy laughed dryly. "And I think you'll be the one to give it to me," he added quietly with a barbed smile.

"...Never..." Shadow growled through the pain.

Archenemy only chuckled patiently, like a parent scolding a child. "I think you will... if you want to get out of here and end your pain."

Shadow paused at that, confused, trying to read his expression through the fuzzy haze. "What... are you saying...?"

"I'm saying that if you tell me the secret I'm after... I'll get you out of here. You have my word."

Shadow could hardly believe her ears. Her greatest enemy, offering a lifeline... an escape... at the cost of the most dangerous secret in the world, the one she'd spent so much energy keeping. She knew it could be a trap, and Archenemy could leave her there to suffer and perish even if she kept her end of the bargain... but she couldn't take it. She was in so much pure, raw agony... she'd do anything to make it stop... even if it meant the whole city might burn one day.

Selfishly, perhaps, to make such a risky sacrifice... but she couldn't take any more pain.

Archenemy's wicked smile broadened. He could see from the helpless devastation etched into her face that he'd won. He leaned his ear down to her mouth expectantly, and after a moment of hesitation... Shadow gave him the most powerful knowledge in existence, whispered in broken breaths of air drenched with pain.

Archenemy finally pulled away with a satisfied smirk, eyes glittering coldly, full of malicious, greedy intent. "And to think it was right in front of me this whole time," he muttered to himself in disbelief.

"I gave you... what you wanted... now please... help... me..." Shadow slurred weakly.

Archenemy shifted her off his lap, and Shadow's gut twisted, thinking he wouldn't keep his promise... that he'd leave her to be brutally tortured and mauled even further... but then Archenemy reached into his pocket, pulling out a little black device in his hand that he held up with a wolfish expression on his face, locking eyes with Shadow.

"I... am good to my word." Archenemy pressed a single button... and all the lights in the mansion went dark at all once, plunging the party into chaos.

[d6andabrush]

I’m on the first season of The Magnus Archives, a curious podcast that, for all intents and purposes, appears to be a well-told monster-of-the-week gig.

However, from listening to The Magnus Archives, I’m now aware that curiosities like this conceal a darker nature. And if my divination tumblr feed is correct, TMA will soon crack itself open with a nauseating crunch, and reveal the most devastating queer tragedy between slightly different!Crowley and Aziraphale, and, as one user pointed out, ruin a part of my life.

[mychlapci]

Thinking about milfy Rodimus again. He's embarrassed by his new belly and saggy, stretched tits. He feels gross and unattractive and doesn't want to risk yet another pregnancy further ruining his body. Bots are fucking heartbroken over this, that he won't let them fuck him anymore. He won't even let anyone finger him or eat him out because he feels too gross about his body.

Although if they ask really, really nicely, he'll still suck spike, as long as he does it while kneeling so they can't see his body. One time, a bot, out of their mind, begs him to let them jack off on his tits. Reluctantly, he lets them, so long as they don't touch. Meanwhile the other bot has basically died and gone to heaven. They're ecstatically thanking Rodimus as they shoot their load all over those saggy, milfy tits. Maybe they beg him and he lets them lick the cum off his chest.

Either way, word gets around. More bots beg him to be allowed to cum on his tits. Some of them don't even want a blowjob, they just want to look at him while they paint his tits with their cum. And they move slowly down his body from there, asking to cum on his belly and then his thighs, groping at his tits and belly. Asking to rub their spikes on his tits and belly. While licking his thighs clean of transfluid, one bot asks him please please can I eat out your valve. He allows it.

And before he knows it he's pregnant again. He's devastated. His baby weight had finally evened out a bit. He wasn't losing too much more but he wasn't gaining and now he's gonna be back to the start again, feeling disgusting and unattractive. He keeps it a secret for a bit because he likes how much the other bots are worshipping his body and he knows they'll be disgusted once he goes back to being fat again.

Of course this isn't what happens. He accidentally lets slip a hint about his pregnancy, maybe mentions cravings or something and the floodgates open. Bots fucking him through a dozen overloads every day, telling him how hot he'll look once he's properly round and fat again. How they can't wait until his tits fill up with milk. They'll bring him all the fuel he craves, massage away any aches he has, how they can't wait to see him nursing another sparkling. AND he'll have that beautiful baby weight on him again. Just saying that makes the bot currently fucking him cum right away, deliriously praising and thanking him.

And when he delivers the sparkling the attention doesn't go away. They still want him, still think he's attractive, and probably did all along. Next time a bot asks if they can try to impregnate him he lets them

oughhhh milf Rodimus my beloved... I am always thinking about milf Rodimus.

He’s constantly trying to hide his baby weight, stuffing it into plating that he’s outgrown a long time ago, only for it to awkwardly spill out between the seams. He thinks bots stare at him because they think the visible rolls of fat mesh are disgusting, but really, they just can’t wait to see that plating pop open and spill all those wonderful curves out.

The crew can quickly fuck his worries out of him, though. A few more babies down the line and Rodimus realizes that they have no intention of ever letting him lose weight. Or to stop getting him pregnant <3 He slowly learns to understand that he’s a very sexy momma and everyone wants him.

[elisysd]

17. I was tame, I was gentle til the circus life made me mean

Masterlist - Previously - Next

Chapter soundtrack: Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? - Taylor Swift

It hadn’t been easy to contact Jean without you knowing, but he had managed. That’s the reason why he was sitting at the terrace of a parisian cafe, waiting for your colleague and mentor to appear. It didn’t take long before the man with glasses that he had seen countless of times before, finally showed up in front of him. 

“I can’t say I’m surprised to hear from you,” Jean said, taking place in front of him while a waiter appeared to take his order. 

“So I suppose you know why I asked if we could meet.”

“It’s about Y/N, right?”

“She doesn’t admit it but she misses working with you.”

“And she is missed by the whole team. She was doing an amazing job but it’s not that easy, believe me. We tried to talk to our boss, we tried to contact the trade union to see if there was something we could do, we negotiated… but it is out of our hands. From what I gathered, the sport service would be ready to have her back and pushed in that direction but it is the higher ups who don’t want to hear anything. They are scared for the reputation of the channel,” Jean explained as Charles huffed. 

“Bullshit. Complete bullshit. So they have no intention to give her job back despite what they told her?” Jean’s face dropped down and Charles instantly knew there was something that he wasn’t saying. “What?” he asked. 

“I know they sent an official contract termination letter to her. She is going to receive it anytime.”

“She moved out, she lives at my place now.”

“Yeah, she communicated the address change. Congratulations, by the way. Treat her well, she needs you. Now more than ever,” Jean sadly smiled, patting Charles’ back as he got up and prepared himself to leave. Charles just nodded, unsure of what to add. The only thing he knew was that you would be devastated once you would get the letter. 

He arrived in a silenced apartment, curtains closed and without any sound that could lead him to you. He checked his phone twice, in case he had missed a text from you, but nothing. He called your name but only silence answered him. He tried to call your phone and finally heard a distant buzzing coming from his office and a voice, your voice, swearing, followed by muffled sounds. His feet carried him to the door where he attempted to open it, without any success. You had barricaded yourself inside, which worried him. 

“Y/N… baby, open please, I know you’re in here.”

It took him a few minutes to convince you to unlock the office but when he saw your glossy eyes, he knew. And the letter lying on the floor only confirmed his instincts. 

“They… they fi… fired… me,” you stuttered in disbelief.

“Come here,” Charles opened his arms wide, letting you fall into them as he pulled you strongly against his chest. “I’m here. I’m right there.”

Your sobs broke his heart as you broke down and soaked his shirt. 

“So, this is all over, then? With a letter? Something so… informal. I mean, I don’t know what I was expecting. It’s just… I don’t know.”

“You’re in shock.”

“All my blood, sweat and literal tears went into this job. For Luc, my grandpa…me. And for what? Look where I end up. With nothing besides broken dreams and shattered hopes,” you nervously laughed and Charles fidgeted. He was scared to ask but he had to.

“Does.. it change anything… for us?”

“What do you mean?”

“Listen, I want you happy, I want you thriving and if I’m holding you back… no matter how much I love you, I don’t want to stand between your dreams and yourself.”

You stared at him and sighed. 

“You’re the only constant in my life, right now. The only light in my life. If you leave me…  I don’t know what I will do. I love you. You’re my happiness,” you reassured him, putting a hand on his cheek, forcing him to look at you. He nodded, shyly.

“Maybe… I could offer you something. I need someone who knows the media inside out to help me build my brand. And listen to me fully before you turn it down. You could work from home, you wouldn’t have to follow me everywhere. You could have your own office. And Lorenzo is working with me on this and he, we, could use your input. You would be a great asset.”

“I’m not sure mixing business with pleasure is a good idea.”

“Think it through before giving me an answer, alright?”

“Would you hate me if I wasn’t following you for the next races? I need to sort everything out. And I need to think it through.”

After Monza, Singapore came rather quickly and Charles would never admit it out loud, but he hated the distance between you. At least physical because if the timezone and his schedule would allow it, he was finding himself chatting and texting on the phone with you. It had earned him a few jokes here and there from his team and from Pierre, but he had just shrugged them off. You seemed to be fine which, instead of reassuring him, was worrying him. He started to know you well by now and he knew you were one to keep everything for yourself because that’s how you had always moved through your life. You weren’t used to having someone to rely on and it would keep on taking a little more time for you to finally understand that it was okay to lean on him when times were rough. But you would get there, Charles was sure of it. 

Meanwhile on the other side of the world, in Monaco, you hadn’t taken a day off despite being currently unemployed. You had wrapped up any loose ends you still had in Paris and made sure your whole life had been transferred to Monaco. Sure, it seemed precocious to take such a big step in your very new relationship with the Ferrari driver but it felt right. And you always trusted your gut feeling. If it seemed right, then it was right. As for your work situation, it was a simple conversation with your best friend that had struck a new frightening but oh so exciting idea. 

“And what are you going to do, now? You’ve never been one to stay on the sideline,” she had asked you. 

“I don’t know… to be honest, I’m lost at the moment. My whole life is in shambles and just the idea of trying to think of the next step is giving me anxiety attacks.”

“So… that means no more motorsport action for you, then? As a media person, I mean.”

“I don’t want to give up on that but I don’t know how to go back to it,” you had admitted.

“Freelance journalist? I know it doesn’t pay much but at least you could choose for whom you would work…”

You had stayed silent, completely frozen for what seemed to be minutes for your best friend, as the wheels started to turn in your mind and a newly found excitement made its way in the pit of your stomach.

“You’re a genius, you know that?” you had smirked. 

“That’s what people usually say of me. But seriously, what are you thinking of?”

“Something big.”

Following the conversation you had worked on your plan, on your own, without talking about it to anyone. You wanted it to be bulletproof before starting any conversations. So you had kept it to yourself until it was finally ready to be talked about. You knew Singapore was a busy weekend for everyone and it would have been the GP you had been the most excited about to cover. But you weren’t there and you had to deal with it. Charles had a lot of work and your exchanges were fewer and fewer, both of you being busy. So the only person you contacted ahead of the weekend to have an opinion on your project was Jean. 

“Y/N… what a surprise. How are you holding up?” he asked.

“Good. Better than I imagined I would be. I’m not calling for chit-chatting.”

“I thought so. What do you need?” you could hear the smile in his voice.

“I have an idea, a project. But I don’t know where to begin to make it happen. I thought you could help me.”

“I have a few minutes to spare. Lance Stroll canceled our interview last minute.”

“It’s always fun,” you sarcastically commented. “I wanna launch an independent media. More like, I want to interview people from behind the scene in motorsport. I was thinking of people like Hannah Schmitz or Susie Wolff. Not drivers. People that make the sport. I was thinking of a podcast. Something independent. Something that is me. I know that I could sell the idea to some media and maybe some of them would be willing to pay me for broadcasting it but I don’t want to work under someone anymore. If working alongside people like you and Marion, if dating Charles taught me something, it’s that I’m more than just capable of doing my job. I’m good at what I do, I have ideas,  have experience, I have passion. I’m just not sure where to begin,” you explained in one breath until the line was silent, making you wonder if Jean was still here. 

“Where do I sign up for this?” Jean finally said. 

You smiled. It was all you needed to confirm that you were on the right path. 

If all seemed to go well for you, it wasn’t the case for Charles. Singapore had been a mess. He was happy for Ferrari but it was a bittersweet feeling. He had tremendously helped Carlos to win and if he wasn’t expecting from his teammate a profusion of gratitude, he was still expecting at least a word from him. Instead, he had been thrown to the wolves as soon as the race had ended and the comments about him being a washed up driver hurt. Especially when his teammate wasn’t saying anything to try to appease the situation. 

The only thing that made him feel slightly better was hearing your voice, filled with anger, when he came back to his room, completely exhausted. 

“If he won it’s because you decided to sacrifice your race! You made the call! Ferrari’s strategists weren’t smart enough to think about it! And you only missed the podium because they fucked up your pitstop! Again. If they hadn’t, it would have been a 1-2 for Ferrari. And the fact that Carlos prefers to praise Lando… it pisses me off! Lando isn’t his teammate. He should go back to McLaren if he prefers to work with him, then. Seriously. You don’t know how much self-control it takes me to not hop on the platforms and tell people who insult you to go fuck themselves. I’m proud of you, for what it is worth. And I love you. And I miss you.”

“You know it is sexy when you defend me like that.”

You laughed. 

“You’re delirious.”

“Maybe a little. I’m exhausted and hot. But I do know that I have a sexy and brave and smart girlfriend. I'm very serious and clear-minded when it comes to this topic. Enough about me, I want to forget this race. How have you been?  We haven't talked much lately.”

“Well… I’ve been busy.”

“Busy with?”

“Creating my own media.” you stated, proud of yourself. 

“Oh… wow… well. You haven’t told me, I didn’t know that was something you had in mind.”

“ I wanted to plan everything first and go through the administrative documentation. What do you think?”

“I think that I support you at one hundred percent. If you need anything, just tell me.”

“Thanks Charles. You know, it’s you who gives me the strength to achieve that. If I hadn’t met you, I don’t think I would have ever been brave enough to try something like that.”

“You would have been. You don’t give yourself enough credit. You’re amazing and I don’t think there is anything you can’t do.”

“There is one thing I can’t do and that I need you for.” you chuckled, always feeling a little awkward when he was putting you on a pedestal you didn’t think you were deserving. 

“Ask away.”

“Do you think I could come with you for the Austin GP and stay until the end of the season?”

Author's note: I wish I could have managed to release this chapter sooner but I went to see The Eras Tour in Wembley (and it was amazing omg take me back) and then spent some time with my boyfriend so I yeah, writing has not really been possible and I'm so sorry. Bu the good thing is, I have so many ideas for this story and I'm very excited to write and share them. So it means that updates should be more frequent now!!!

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

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[sweetheartblue]

This one’s for the ffxiv girlies

[ewwww-what]

Average fig post on crystalbook or whatever they call it

[angriepeanut]

This came to me in a vision

[ubejamjar]

polyamory week // one // sleeping positions

"Should we wake them up?"

[frodolives]

The way this is the first time Hornblower ever displays any love for anybody

[ofdarklands]

Bonus 3 - Sparrow Swarm

You never know.

[foolsocracy]

Weeping over them

i too shed tears over the fab five. theyre such a good collection of little guys its almost too good

[vaiisravana]

Sometimes I remember that Kazuma, a boy who was strangled to death, has the vessel name Chokey

[oliversrarebooks]

The more you talk about Mastero the more I’m getting Manfred Von Karma from Ace Attorney vibes

(For context this man killed a defense attorney and let the guy’s 6-year-old son believe he did it for almost 15 years because the attorney almost blemished his perfect prosecution streak of 40 years and he looks like this)

What the fuck. I am deceased. You are absolutely correct. That's literally what I'm writing here.

And that would make Alexander and Lily Edgeworth and Franziska and...

oh god they kind of fucking are, aren't they, the similarities get even worse in the stuff I haven't posted yet

I need to go lie down