halfte-dice

[princehendir]

Does Minecraft incentivize killing golems though?

[floralovebot]

Hi, I want to ask your opinion on something. You made a post that said changing the Winx's races is bad. I agree that it's not okay but I have a question about Helia. I thought he was Native American when I was a child but you've said he's Asian. Is it wrong to think he's Native American?

I had to think about how to answer this for a while tbh! Sorry for the late reply

Anyway, I probably could answer this with a simple yes or no but I really feel like I should explain my answer.

I'm pretty sure you're referencing this post! Anyway, the biggest issue with race changing the canon characters of color is that when you do it, you're participating in erasure. Again, it's not more representation to, for example, make Flora asian - it's erasure because you're intentionally erasing her being latina. Now like I said, I don't have an issue with like,, children not noticing their canon races or ethnicities. It's perfectly fine if a little kid sees characters as something else! The problem is grown adults ignoring and erasing their canon races.

When it comes to Helia specifically, he is very much coded as asian, specifically east asian. I want to clarify that it's not explicitly canon. Rainbow has never stated what race he's supposed to represent and they've never said if he was based on a real person. We don't even know what planet he's actually from! So his race is all coding. However, that coding is still,,, fairly obvious. And I specifically want to touch on how Rainbow depicts their east asian characters versus their indigenous characters.

Most of their east asian characters have either dark blue, black, or brown hair and more narrow eyes. Like,, that's their go-to when trying to make a character Noticeably asian. They're also fond of putting their asian characters in traditional clothing (like qi pao or hanfu) rather than casual clothing. I added Helia at the very bottom so you can see how he compares to other, canonically asian characters.

While Rainbow has absolutely depicted asian characters in offensive ways (espero...), it's usually pretty respectful. Meanwhile,,, their depiction of indigenous characters is... anything but.

Like before, I put a picture of Helia so you can compare him to the canonically indigenous characters. As you can see here, their depiction of indigenous characters is,, extremely racist! It follows a lot of racist stereotypes like red skin, face paint, headdress, feathers, etc. Just,,, all around Not Good. And you'll notice that Helia doesn't really "fit in" visually. That's not to say that he has to look like that to be indigenous but remember that this is an animated show with intentional designs made by white people. If he was meant to be seen as indigenous, he would likely share more characteristics with these characters (like having darker, red-toned skin). Again, their depiction of indigenous characters is extremely racist. I don't think there's a single indigenous character in winx that doesn't look like a walking stereotype out of an old cowboy film. Unfortunately, Helia would absolutely look different and more like those racist designs if he was meant to be indigenous.

Now, to actually answer your question. Is it okay to see Helia as indigenous, and specifically indigenous to the americas? Well... as Helia's racial coding is still just coding and not explicit, it's not a crime if you don't see him as asian. Like,, while I do absolutely think he was meant to be seen as asian, it's still technically ambiguous enough that it's not a Bad thing if you don't see him as such.

That said, you need to be extremely careful with how you think of and portray Helia as indigenous. I've talked before about Rainbow including quite a few stereotypes about east asian men with Helia, and unfortunately, most if not all of them, can also apply to indigenous men. For example, Helia is calmer and wise (often shown to give advice in poetic ways), connected to nature (ie, birds, plants, Flora), frequently meditates, etc. These are all common stereotypes for indigenous men. I'd actually recommend reading this wikipedia article!

Anyway, seeing him as indigenous isn't inherently wrong, but there's absolutely a chance that you're picking up on indigenous stereotyping rather than coding or a headcanon. Like the long hair, connection to nature, the pacifist comment, the weird and kind of cryptic one-liners he occasionally has... Unfortunately, a lot of the indigenous!Helia headcanons/redesigns I've seen have been really racist. And the common reasoning for why they think he's indigenous often comes down to these common stereotypes.

So like,,, god I know this is long but honestly the answer is complicated. It's not a simple yes or no. It really, really depends on why you think he's indigenous. Like. Just ask yourself yknow? Why do you think this? Think of an actual reason that isn't just "vibes". And if you're creating any kind of content, even if it's just daydreaming tbh, how are you depicting him? Is there even the slightest hint of a stereotypical depiction? (And again, please research stereotypical depictions because there are a lot and quite a few contradict each other)

If you're confident that you're not stereotyping him, then honestly, it's not that bad to see him as indigenous. I do ask that you try to see and understand him being asian coded, as I do think that's important, regardless of whether or not it's in your face explicit. However, it's not like. a crime if you don't see him as asian. Just be very, very, Very careful with how you think of and portray indigenous!Helia.

Also,,, I didn't know quite how to fit this into the rest of the post but,, while it's not Bad for you to not see Helia as asian, you should think about why that is. For example, there are still a lot of people in the fandom who don't see Nabu as asian, despite his coding being extremely in your face and honestly canon at this point. But because he has darker skin, he's from Andros, and he was with Aisha, a lot of people assumed he was black. That's not inherently a bad thing, but some of those people get really mad when others point out that he's very much south asian which,,, is a bad thing. I understand the feeling of losing rep and wanting to protect that, but you shouldn't bulldoze other groups to do it.

I'm not sure what your opinion of asian Helia is, but if you're like,, against him being asian or refuse to see that very intentional coding just because you really like the idea of him being indigenous,, you should think about that and reassess things.

[felicjana050896]

A few words about Charlastor

Today I saw this post:

(Sorry, I can't post the link, Twitter doesn't want to work on my computer today :\ )

I will quote it here because it made me think again:

Currently, the closest person to Charlie is Vaggie, while Alastor invades her space, Vaggie and Alastor are opposed to each other, Vaggie wants to run a hotel for Charlie (her whole life is based on Charlie...), while Alastor has his own reasons (more on which later we don't fully know) and the two are portrayed as opposing forces pulling Charlie, Vaggie in one direction and Alastor in the other. Charlie's relationship with Alastor will deepen in future seasons (which the author wrote about, that Alastor and Charlie are the main characters of HH and what we see after the pilot), thus distancing it from Vaggie, which we see already in the first season (and what I wrote posts about ), that Charlie's relationship with Vaggie will surely deteriorate as it goes on, their quarrel over Vaggie's lie was, in my opinion, just the first glitch in their relationship (although not very well written in my opinion anyway), at some point in the story Charlie will had to choose between Vaggie and Alastor (and Niffty):

And considering the other screenshots, they are either forshadowings only to the fact that in future seasons Charlie will be getting closer to Alastor and away from Vaggie, or they may generally herald Alastor's victory over Vaggie, it depends, they are definitely confirmation that the further the seasons, the more Charlostor's content we will have than Chaggie's, the only question is which one will be the endgame?

Alastor stealing Charlie:

Significant bed scene, Vaggie wakes up without Charlie, alone, and Charlie is later in bed with Alastor on a heart-shaped pillow:

Besides, I read about Zoophobia and old sketches of Alastor and Autumn, and in my opinion Autumn reminds me a bit of Charlie... but in order.... First, let's go to Roo or Eve (if you prefer), well, I saw one Tik Tok and I definitely agree with it:

Charlie actually resembles Eve much more than Lilith, it always surprised me that Charlie has more father-like features both in appearance and character, and has none of Lilith's (especially when it comes to her ahem... physical qualities...), but I thought they just made her a typical "daddy's girl" and that's it... but if Eve is Charlie's mother and not Lilith..., we still had Lucifer's comment that he stole from Adam both wives, both Lilith and Eve, and although he married Lilith, he probably slept with Eve..., then the only question arises: why did Lilith decide to raise a child that was not her own?

Roo (Eve):

Charlie:

Lilith:

Lucifer:

Charlie and Eve (Roo) have exactly the same nose, the same lines under their eyes (Charlie in his demonic form has them) and the body sharp is the same, Lucifer by the way does not have a nose (:D), Lilith has a completely different nose, only Eve's nose matches Charlie's....

Moving on, we know that Alastor made a deal with someone, many people speculate that he made it with Lilith, but there are also people who believe that with Roo and I, although I also considered Lilith at the beginning, it was thrown in our faces this 7-year break (that Lilith has not been in Hell for 7 years and Alastor disappeared for 7 years), seems too obvious..., moreover, we know that Lilith had a contract with Adam (end of episode 8), and Adam did not know Alastor, so how could Alastor have an agreement with Lilith and be with her for these 7 years in heaven, if Adam didn't know him at all..., while Roo..., and this is where the issue of Zoophobia begins, i.e. Viv's first idea, where most of the HH characters came from:

In Zoophobia we had the so-called KayCee, i.e. chaos itself and the main antagonist, interestingly KayCee liked apples (a reference to Eve and her picking an apple from the Garden of Eden, the first sin?):

KayCee had white hair, horns, and the original Alastor was in love with her:

So KayCee is nothing other than the prototype of Eve.

Moving on, the original Alastor was also obsessed with Autumn, the character of Zoophobia, a blonde deer:

Autumn is a very helpful and good-hearted character and: ,,Although outwardly he appears mature and rational, in reality he is extremely insecure, suffering from low self-esteem. Autumn continues to seek recognition and thanks from others for a little help from him, showing that he needs the appreciation of others. Autumn is also very sensitive and short-tempered: in the webcomic, when Rusty teases him about the little antlers, Autumn explodes in anger and violently scolds him."

Doesn't this in some way resemble the description of Charlie..., a girl with a good heart, wanting to help everyone, and also sometimes quick-tempered (when, for example, heaven rejects her or when Susan pisses her off :D )

So we have Eve, who used to be KayCee, and Charlie, who has a lot of Autumn in her, and if it turns out that Charlie is actually Eve's daughter, Charlie will be a combination of KayCee and Autumn, considering her appearance and character traits are taken from both, two characters that the original Alastor was crazy about ;)

And finally, some shots of Charlie and Alastor:

And remember about Niffty and KeeKee, they are very important, after all they are in the HH logo :)

KeeKee, a pet belonging to Charlie and Niffty, Alastor's ,,pet" ;)

Sorry for the long post again, but I just can't keep it short :D

Thank you for reading and have a nice day, evening or night :)

[triptychgardener]

Hello sorry if this is a bother but I am asking in good faith where is the reading for transmasc nepeta. I’m asking this cuz of your last ask (the June one) and I see aradia Dirk and Jane. Thoes all I have seen post and analysis about. But I have not really seen anything about nepeta.

Okay so first thing you gotta understand is that gender in Homestuck, for lack of a better way to say it, can be understood in how characters reflect and relate to each other. That being said to understand Nepeta's gender, we gotta understand the gender of at the very least one other person.

Dave.

And more specifically.

Davepeta, Homestuck's very own first(ish) trans character.

Davepeta is noted to be a sort of platonic ideal of existence for both Dave and Nepeta. Somehow, through a strange series of cosmic coincidences, these two end up making an odd sort of parallel. Both having a strange relationship to a man who loves him some goddamn horses. The whole Akwete Purrmusk thing. I mean, Dave canonically engaged in semi-nonironic furry roleplay with Nepeta offscreen, and given what we know about what becoming a furry in Homestuck means, it's not a leap to describe this as their ideal form.

But, although we don't see a lot of Nepeta's character arc, we do see a lot of Dave's. He struggles his whole life under an incredibly oppressive masculine force (both of Bro and, indirectly, Lord English), and once the game is over ends up deconstructing and largely rejecting that.

So when Davesprite, who's also probably been thinking about this for even longer, bereft of purpose or identity, finds a kindred soul in a spunky catgirl... well the rest is Davepeta.

And similarly, there are points in the story where Nepeta acts kind of uncomfortable with how others see her as exclusively something to be protected. The whole "Dear, sweet, precious Nepeta" grates on her early on, as Equius uses it as an excuse to control her actions. The whole of moiraillegience as it is originally explained (i.e. one party helps to calm down an especially brutal and violent person from outbursts of anger, and in turn that person will protect the more docile, even-tempered soul from external harm) even kind of FEELS like the way heterosexual relationships are portrayed in a lot of conservative spaces, where women are nuturers and caretakers while men are protectors. And Nepeta is supposed to, in this situation, be the person who helps Equius manage his emotions, which she feels some consternation at!

Now, over the course of Hivebent, their relationship appears to evolve and get a bit more balanced, but it still carries these overtones of "I will protect you, and you will handle my outbursts." Notably, when Equius goes to seek the Highb100d, and leaves Nepeta behind.

And of course not after roleplaying as each other.

Which. I mean come on.

But notably, Nepeta doesn't just stay put! She doesn't really want to be protected all the time! And when push comes to shove, she leaps out to defend, or at the very least avenge, her best friend.

And then, we don't really see Nepeta for a while!

Until we get to the end of the comic.

During their whole "date", Nepeta seems a little uncomfortable with Jasprose's affections. She may be a bit flattered, but Jasprose also fully admits later that she was frankly looking for any girl she could fall in love with after the tragic death of her girlfriend and possible more tragic untimely resurrection.

But then the pivotal handshake happens, and we get to see who is perhaps the most happy being in all of Homestuck.

Then we get into some of the only actual discussion of gender in Homestuck. We don't get much besides that, for both of their lives, Dave and Nepeta both felt something was missing. Something felt wrong that they couldn't quite place that made them both miserable. I don't think it's a massive stretch to say this could be gender dysphoria.

And when they combine, they feel the fullness of the gendered experience they were missing, melded together like a two-piece puzzle.

Now while the abovementioned "strong identities as a boy and a girl" might throw you off, I would point to what Victoria Lacroix said about this passage: note the lack of the word "respectively." I rest my case.

Now full disclosure, my personal headcanon for Nepeta is genderfluid transmasc. The whole affinity for roleplaying lends itself to a more shifting identity and I just think Nepeta, given more time, would love exploring the little nooks and crannies of gender.

This isn't going into the more complicated shit with Gender when it comes to Equius and Dirk and all that other stuff. Here's a quick summary so you can see exactly how my brain is broken.

Anyways, thanks for the question! I hope I answered my thoughts on the topic adequately! If other people have more to say about this, please feel free to add on!

[inthehouseoffinwe]

Please if you have any good opinions on Turgon let me know because I currently can’t stand the guy and I do want to at least somewhat like him.

Edit: Sorry sorry! 1/3, not 2/3. I’ve corrected the post.

But anyway, can we talk about Turgon taking 1/3 of the Noldor to Gondolin.

Like I can find it in me to like or at least understand pretty much every Finwëan. But Turgon? That guy makes me furious. As do the Noldor who decided to follow him. Literally what was the point of coming to Beleriand if they were just going to hide away. They literally abandoned everyone to Morgoth.

‘But Ulmo told him to!’

Ok fine. I get it. Turgon (and Finrod) were still somewhat faithful and wanted to follow through. But to take that many people with you? To let so many people come with you, knowing your brother and father aren’t gonna know where you are and if anything suddenly goes wrong, you’re not gonna make it in time and its goodbye remaining family.

(Also imo the Valar have an admittedly not malicious, but bad habit of choosing those they think are the smartest, strongest, etc, and taking them away from the rest of their people, leaving the rest to suffer. Making small temporary paradises that statistically can’t last forever. I’m counting Numenor here. But that’s beside the point.)

Anyway I am fully of the opinion that if Turgon’s not so little sect had decided to stay and actually take part, the Bragollach would have gone very differently, leading to a potential victory in the Nirnaeth, despite the betrayals. The entire battle plan would’ve been different.

Like think about it right. 2/3 of the Noldor left fighting in Beleriand. Those are cut down pretty badly in the Bragollach to the point I’d say a good 50% of the Noldor now reside in Gondolin. That’s the force they have to make a fight plan for the Nirnaeth. Turgon did turn up but like. Do you get what I mean? When you have that many more fighters, the entire plan could’ve been changed, but I’m getting too far ahead. Let’s go back to the Bragollach.

I have this thing talking about Fingolfin’s last, desperate attempt at Morgoth. If his son, daughter, and granddaughter, and a large bulk of his people had been there to help, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have gone. Wouldn’t have felt the need to go. Aegnor and Angrod might not have been killed. The Feanorions would have been displaced still, but been able to reclaim some of their lands with more elves to fight back.

Because say what you will, they successfully coordinated a 400 year long siege on Angband with Fingolfin and co, and that’s a two way deal. They can clearly band together to take on a larger enemy. As you know, I’m also of the opinion Fingolfin genuinely loved his nephews even if he didn’t get along with their father.

You might be wondering ‘but what about Aredhel.’ I have generally mixed opinions, but don’t actively dislike her. The main thing is idk how many people followed her specifically, but I don’t think it was that many.

That said I do feel really bad for Fingon who’d lost Argon over the ice and now his remaining little siblings were gone who knows where, somewhere he couldn’t even help them if they needed it. I’m sorry you don’t just abandon siblings like that, especially in a situation which always has the potential to go suddenly wrong (as we see with the Bragollach.) This coming from a little sibling btw, maybe that’s why I have such strong feelings on this 😂

But I’ll make a Fingon specific post another time.

AS I SAID, please please if you have saving opinions on Turgon comment so I can like this dude. I haven’t read the Fall of Gondolin and generally don’t know a bunch about him, but our vibes ain’t vibing rn 💀

[tobyisave]

Trust & Insecurity in Kiibo & Miu's relationship

(In response to @strawberrysweater ! Thanks for opening this can of worms and sorry for this huge post lmaooo)

To preface this: I do love them together!! I just enjoy looking for the places they might clash at times if they were actually in a relationship... So this is about the things that keep them from fully understanding/trusting each other. And ofc this is just my interpretation!!

My short answer:

(1) Miu only thinks she is valuable as an inventor and sexual object, (2) Most people only care about Kiibo as a scientific novelty, and (3) they both have JUST enough evidence to convince themselves that this is also how they view each other. Even if deep down they're only playing these roles in an attempt to get closer to another human being.

On top of that, even though they're especially vulnerable with each other, I think there's still a lot of misunderstanding between them that would be difficult for them to reconcile. First because they have some genuine points of conflict, and second because they each have problems communicating and reading people (i.e. reality distorting levels of abandonment issues & obligatory robot autism coding, respectively)

Elaboration under the cut:

PART A - Insecurities

You can see (1) and (2) a bit in their other relationships:

Miu is of course hypersexual at all times, and she gives inventions to Shuichi (FTE) and her fantasy lover (love suite) because, as she confesses herself, inventing stuff is the only way she knows how to show affection for other people besides offering them her body.

Her inventions and hypersexuality are also the only explicit points of connection between her and Kokichi, arguably the only other character she is remotely close to besides Kiibo and Shuichi.

So given that most of her onscreen relationship with Kiibo is sexual or scientific (or both) in nature, it’s easy for her to go on believing these are the only things she has to offer. It’s a bit self-fulfilling of course because she’s arguable the one controlling the direction of their relationship in the first place, and at this point I’m not sure she believes there’s anything else to her.

[Shout out to @cloudysonder for helping develop this take :P]

I get the impression Kiibo has met a lot of people over his life who only want to talk about how cool it is that he’s a robot, even though that’s not a part of his identity he initially likes to bring up.

In his FTE with Shuichi, he goes straight into 'demonstrating my functions' mode as if it's the only way he knows how to talk to people

We see him treated in this fetishized way in-game too: with Kokichi chasing him to be “friends with a robot”; with Kaede’s FTE asking him invasive questions and touching his buttons without asking; and in postgame with Kazuichi basically assaulting him and trying to take him apart out of scientific curiosity --- all of these within just his first or second interactions with these people!

So it's a BIG thing for him to willingly let Miu sit there and take him apart, when he already spends so much time fending off virtual strangers who don't respect his bodily autonomy. And he's not used to people taking a genuine interest in him as a person so he’s hesitant to let himself believe Miu is any different, especially when her interest is so explicitly centered around his biology.

Plus as long as Kiibo is physically dependent on Miu, there's going to be a lot of room for insecurity to fester on BOTH sides:

"Does Kiibo really need me or does he just need my technical skills? Does he want to do these favors for me or does he feel like he has to?"

"Does Miu really care who I am or does she just want to gawk at my body like everyone else does? Does she care who I am or am I just the first boy(?) to give her the time of day? Does she want to help me or does she just know she’s the only one who can?"

This is the biggest hurdle IMO because it's a necessarily unbalanced relationship, and it will have to continue for the foreseeable future, no matter how they feel about each other.

PART B - Respect/communication

Another thing is that I don't think they fully respect each other — kind of for the same reason the rest of the group doesn’t respect them either

Miu might not consider Kiibo a person. We know Kiibo was worried about this; when asking Shuichi to use the electrohammer on him he explains, "The outcome will settle once and for all how Miu perceived me." This, and the fact she says robots aren’t people in trial, make me pretty confident that she has never looked him in the eye and said "I consider you a person."

I think she has a complex relationship with Kiibo’s personhood. On one hand if he’s a thing then it’s much easier for her to control him (esp given what we see of their relationship) and this soothes her anxious heart by ensuring that he can’t abandon her.

At the same time, if this is the case, then his coerced/artificial love isn’t worth as much as it would be if it came from an autonomous human person — to her insecure mind, it becomes Miu alone in her room playing boyfriend girlfriend with a doll, if that makes sense. 

To clarify, I’m not saying she BELIEVES he’s just an object, but it’s an idea that both comforts and torments her.

It's worth noting, too, that Miu doesn't always respect people's consent. This is especially risky when you factor in their mechanic-robot relationship (which already comes with a difficult power dynamic) and Kiibo’s naive/somewhat people-pleasing personality.

On Kiibo’s end: I think it’s safe to say he finds her rude/inappropriate at first (though I think it's really sweet that he uses the much more euphemistic description 'brash and spirited' after getting to know her). They also have some pretty stark moral differences --- Kiibo is distraught to learn that Miu wasn't above murdering their classmates, for example.

More importantly, I headcanon he has a lot of difficulty understanding her at all  – on an emotional level, yes, and and on a literal level he just straight up doesn’t understand many of the sentences she says either

K: “Most of that was unintelligible nonsense, but…” after Miu explains her “secret woman weapon." IMO his decision to phrase this as an insult helps mask the fact he's not familiar with all the lewd references she just made

He also has problems understanding emotions from the start, and Miu is DIFFICULT to track because she cycles through emotions so rapidly.

+ he might find it hard to extrapolate that many of the things she does are part of a facade. The crass egotistical miu who says he’s not a person is equally as real to him as the deeply insecure miu wants to believe he is a person (if not more real…)

PART C

Also these bullets from my personal doc I don't have the willpower to expand on atm:

They are both so prone to misinterpreting people unkindly

They’re also both so misled about how committed a relationship is supposed to be. Like I think Kiibo would consider a confession from literally anyone to be tantamount to a proposal (based on his love suite scene). And Miu wouldn’t be quite so fast but i do think it’d still be a huge deal for her because she falls very hard very easily (based on her FTE). Which is all very cute but being plunged into a big commitment like that can be crazy stressful, esp for two teens who have never dated before (imo) and have no frame of reference. [I was actually just going to post about this part lol]

PART D

All that said... I love them together and I DO think they could make it work without too much heartbreak. A lot of the things I describe as problems here could easily be taken as strengths.

e.g. Their misunderstanding of how relationships work ironically makes them more compatible, since they're both ready to go whole hog (if Kiibo determines that he actually likes her that is). Miu's rapidly fluctuating emotions are confusing, but on some level I think he'd admire how deeply and obviously she is able to feel things. And of course Miu as an inventor has a deep (almost objectum like??) respect for machines that helps Kiibo accept that he can be a robot and a person at the same time, and is probably the only one in the class who understands just how impressive he really is.

Thanks thanks THANKS for reading if you seriously read all that!! Mwah!!!!

I would love to hear anyone's takes on my takes too :P I haven't been rotating them in my head for too long yet so I'm still developing my interpretations...

[angelicsjn]

I was the one that submitted the form and it had Hayden as my favourite with the passing comment that I made mad money just so he can have his career.

I know in the Domestic Life ask, he fears settling down due to the fact that he'd need to give up his photography for something more stable. But ha! Sike! His darling makes 6+ figures and is willing to support him fully. The cutie is gonna get the house husband treatment but hey, he gets to pursue photography with a big safety net. If anything, his photography profits is their play money for vacations and getting pampered together.

So, how would Hayden react to that? Would he enjoy it and settle down sooner?

- ✨ Anon

HAYDEN WEST.

A N: I love this so much. When I read your answer, something lit up inside of me. This is so real. Honestly, the dynamic sort of reminds me of Levi and William on tiktok. Their relationship are my actual goals... ps. If you see any typos and mistakes, no, you didn't. Look away, it never existed.

A B O U T: Hayden is apprehensive about settling down, but you have funds to do so. How does he feel about it? Read to find out.

W A R N I N G S: None. Other than Hayden being a sweetheart.

As stated in an old post, Hayden's only setback in settling down is his career path, and he knows that it's not sustainable in the long run.

Hayden isn't the type to sacrifice his passions to make life comfortable; his passions are his life. He would be nothing without them.

But he knows that at some point he will have to decide on what path he will take because he doesn't only have to pay for himself now, he also has you in his life.

But! Maybe there's another solution...?

Hayden's obsession with you grew in a short space of time, he went from watching you; hoping that you'd look his way one day to sleeping in your bed feeling more loved than he has ever been loved before. He takes care of you, you take care of him and even though you don't know about all the things he's done behind the scenes, you know how deeply he loves you. He just has a way of knowing you, understanding you like no other.

One thing that he never found out was how much money you had in your bank. Really, Hayden doesn't care much for that kind of thing. Whilst stalking you, he never pressed much attention into what jobs you did, where your money came from and how much you had; money is just a thing to survive to him. He wanted to know the silly and deep things about you.

He never questioned it either due to the fact that you live humbly — sure, more well off than him, but that wouldn't be hard, Hayden didn't grow up in the best of areas. To him a home cooked meal each day is a privilege and reward, so he knew you were rich in sense of. But not in the way you actually are.

When the conversation of moving in together comes up he sort of freezes. He didn't see how you'd both survive. Besides his general insecurities of you growing out of love for him — he saw how his parents were growing up — he was also shitting bricks over how to get a place and keep it without sacrificing everything and living unhappily.

A huge part of him felt that insecurity riddle it's way into his system over the fact that he, a man, can't provide. That's his job... right? How can he be considered a good man. A good boyfriend. If he can't even look after you?

But you were adamant. You knew he was the one, you've never felt so seen by someone before. He understands you, respects you, loves you for who you are. And that's when the conversation comes up...

"We can do this, Hayden." You said, watching him as his eyes scan across the screen. He was gobsmacked. How the fuck did he miss this? After all that time watching you he missed out the fact that you're loaded, maybe you landed the job yourself. Maybe it's a family thing. Who knows. He didn't know if he was meant to be impressed with you. Or pissed off that you didn't tell him. Or pissed off with himself for missing out such a big detail in your life. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just wanted to be seen for more than what I can offer." You finished, and he understood — not from personal experience. But he got it.

"I know." He mumbled, pushing the laptop away. "I understand, it's okay. I'd have done the same." Hayden meant it, you could tell as he flashed his usual lopsidedely shy smile, his eyes soft and warm. He took your hand and pressed a kiss against your knuckles. "But I want to help out."

You knew how he felt, it was clear as he looked away. He felt small. It wasn't a secret that you lead the relationship, it was natural. The pants fit you better and you both prefer it that way. But you understood how he felt in that moment, what can he give back when he doesn't have much to give.

"Focus on your studies. Continue with your photography and make a business out of it." You said, squeezing his hand in yours. "If you want, you can help out around the house, keep your part time job, I don't know. Anything. It's fine."

Hayden needed some time to think about it, let it roll around in his head until he finally made his decision...

Ultimately, you both knew what would work best. So you tested it out.

Pushing aside his initial insecurities, he realised that the dynamic between you both worked perfectly and if anything you had both never been closer.

Half a year later you're both happy and thriving. The house is beautiful and Hayden even has the space for his own room thats dedicated to his interests and photography, with the saved up money he's gained, thanks to you for being the main provider, he was able to set his business up more professionally and buy better equipment! He's able to turn his dream into a job and he's so grateful and happy for that.

The two of you live happily in your own bubble, Hayden being the homebody that he is, he thrives in his peace and space, even better when you're home with him. He's picked up on new hobbies in the meanwhile, mainly things to make the house a home.

From DIY to crochet, he's making things for the house left right and center and the place feels so cosy and happy.

"I noticed the new pillow covers." You said, something he obviously made, and it looks cute. "Thanks. I'm doing a selection for the different seasons." He shrugged, eating the meal he cooked for you both not long ago.

He cooked you your favourite meal, something he's always cooked for you. You enjoyed it, especially after a hard day at work.

Later that night you would watch movies together in the comfort of your living room, cuddling and eating snacks before accidentally falling asleep.

At first he was hesitant, he didn't want to feel like he wasn't giving you anything back. But in reality he had given you so much more than the both of you realised. Due to you being so busy making the money, he made the house a home and gave you a reason to love going back home to feel loved and secure.

[getvalentined]

hi! i'm actually really interested in the "is cait sith reeve" debate and was fascinated by your post since you firmly believe cait sith is his own person.

i'm playing through dirge right now so i can't comment fully on what transpires there, but based on rebirth alone i'm having trouble believing cait sith isn't controlled by him. i know your post said rebirth excluded a scene that made it clear cait sith is his own person, but I'm not sure what you're referring to exactly. The only thing I can think of is the original game, where Cait Sith sacrifices himself and says not to forget him even if another Cait Sith comes along...which is a good point, though one could potentially argue that Reeve is just sentimental.

Anyway, what I want to know is: if Cait Sith has a personality separate from Reeve and can move independently while Reeve is busy, then why does Cait Sith repeatedly go offline in Rebirth while Reeve is busy? This is the main argument I see and one of my favorites, so I think answering that could help your own. The only arguments I can think up are either that the devs wanted to give players clear hints that Reeve controls Cait Sith, or that he wants to make sure he's monitoring Cait Sith when the cat interacts with the party. But besides that, Cait Sith really doesn't act like a different person. Sure, he has an accent and is silly, but he doesn't make any comment whatsoever (as far as I know) that indicates he isn't Reeve himself. In fact, the party treats Cait Sith and the Shinra employee controlling him as the same person, and Cait Sith doesn't attempt to rebuke it. (Outside of maybe lying that he's a mere amusement park attraction?)

i do admit, if dirge seriously contradicts this interpretation, it's weird for the devs to go against it...but as someone who once believed cait sith and reeve were separate and changed their mind after rebirth, I just don't think there's enough evidence based on rebirth alone to claim that cait sith is his own person.

on that note, you mentioned cait sith has his own likes and dislikes separate from reeve and i'm actually really curious about that! do you have an example of that? :D It sounds like fun trivia lol (i really like reeve and cait sith...)

anyway thank you for reading till the end! sorry if this is unwelcome

There's a scene in Dirge where Reeve and Cait walk out of the same room together, reacting to one another independently:

Further, Cait Sith only goes into stasis twice in the entirety of Rebirth as far as I can recall? Once at the end of a board meeting that Reeve was active in, but seemingly not for the entirety of the board meeting, as Cait Sith appeared to be mid-conversation and trailed off when Reeve got bad news—this makes sense if he's connected to Cait Sith and has the capacity to control him directly as needed, but not if he had to do so actively 100% of the time. The other time is in Cosmo Canyon, because he's clearly not interested in their woo-woo metaphysical nonsense, and he cites it as taking time to recharge his batteries.

Reeve is still working as Director of Urban Planning during all of this, so I find it super hard to believe that he's spending 99.9999% his time at a computer or mentally controlling and speaking through a doll while also running the department that is trying to put Midgar back together after the plate drop—particularly not since we have official meta stating that he's an Inspire, which I cited in a reblog.

Beyond that, there's this bit in the OG, which Cait Sith says to himself, in an empty room:

There is no explanation for this if Cait Sith is entirely remote controlled. There's no one else here to hear it, no reason for him to express these feelings—or even have feelings in the first place!

In Rebirth it's even more clear, because he expresses physical strain as he's literally holding the Temple up by keeping himself wedged under the platform. He's uncomfortable, he's physically taxed, he's in pain. Again, most of this occurs in an empty room, and would not happen if he was just a toy that Reeve had to control directly like a complex RC car or something.

The concept of likes and dislikes that are independent is less solidly shown in-canon, but they have distinctly different personalities, and Reeve is very clearly not interested in things like prophecies and the Promised Land and all that—he is a scientist at the end of the day, a civil and mechanical engineer—and yet Cait Sith's whole shtick is to tell fortunes! This is also something that he seems to enjoy doing quite a bit, even if he's not very good at it. (He gets better. Kinda.)

Cait Sith is obviously connected to Reeve, but it's equally obvious that he's not analogous. Presumably Cait Sith doesn't care when he's equated to Reeve because he is Reeve's eyes and ears in the field, even when he's not in direct control. The fact that he only really talks about himself as an individual when he's alone kind of implies that he'd rather the others not know, because he doesn't want them to be upset about what's going to happen to him; if he were nothing more than a glorified RC toy, this wouldn't be a concern, because he wouldn't have concerns at all.

[cheeseceli]

Falling in Love [deeper than I've felt before]

Pairing: Hyunjin × gn!Reader

Genre: fluff, slowburn

Warnings: reader drinks alcohol at some point, not proofread.

Request: part 2 of Moving On but can be read individually

a/n: it took a while to go to the plot but i promise y/n moves on lmao; the ending is a bit rushed? But creativity had left me sadly. Also this was posted accidentally so I'm so sorry if there is something which seems off

The day has come. And you still can't believe how dumb you were from accepting the invitation to go to your ex's wedding.

You were going straight to the biggest heartbreak you'd ever have, but there was no turning back now. You said you would be in the damn party so you will be there.

"Seriously Y/n, I think you shouldn't go." Yeji, a friend of yours, said while helping you figure out something to wear "Just tell him that you were sick or something. I can lie to him if you want"

"I said I'd be there and I'm not one to break a promise."

"It's barely a promise. He admitted himself that it would be awkward, it's better if you skip it. You're just torturing yourself at this point"

"I'm going. Besides, maybe that's what I need to finally move on. It's been 3 years already. I need that."

Yeji sighed. She openly disagreed with your point of view, there should be another way of moving on without shattering your heart into pieces, but she wouldn't insist anymore.

"We have some hours until the wedding. Let's go to the mall, we need something good for you to wear" she got up from the edge of your bed "unless you wanna go in pajamas."

And that's how, four hours later, you were fully prepared to the wedding. Even though you looked great, you still felt a pain in your chest because of the price you spent. The situation was starting to become a little ridiculous, you couldn't believe you wasted so much money on an outfit you'd never wear again because it'd probably bring a lot of bad memories.

This better have a good outcome.

But deep inside you were happy that Yeji made you put some effort in how you'd look because the place was beautiful. The decoration was really enchanting, with a lot of white and green flowers and you could even hear the sound of a piano. It looked like the wedding was designed to fit a disney princess' movie.

The guests were also gorgeous. Some of them were still your friends while some were "ex-friends", as you lost contact with them after the break up. There were a lot of people you didn't know there, friends and family of Changbin's partner you assumed. It looked like you could actually enjoy the night if it wasn't for the current scenario.

You ended up sitting in the table with all the other Itzy girls and for some moments you were able to forget the bad feeling in your chest. That was until the ceremony started.

Needless to say that you cried during the vows. They were so happy, Changbin was happy. At the same time that your heart was aching, you felt a a weight out of your shoulders. It was like you were finally given the chance to set free from your past and not be attached to it anymore.

Changbin wouldn't come back. You shouldn't wait for him.

It was less painful than what you originally thought. Seeing how he cried after seeing his partner and how he didn't hesitate to kiss them, you could even feel happiness. I'm happy you're happy at last. That's how you were able to clap and celebrate for the now married couple, along the rest of the guests.

Now, of course, you needed to drink. Realisation was still sinking in and you couldn't say congratulations to the couple while being sober. That's why you went straight up to the bar once people started to dance and sat down in the first free chair you could find.

"Y/n?"

You looked to the side and saw Hyunjin. The fact that sooner or later one of the stray kids members would show up slipped of your mind and you were actually surprised for seeing the boy in front of you. Even though you were still friends with Changbin, you barely talked to the kids. The last time you saw Hyunjin was two years ago, you think. He got even prettier, you noticed.

"Hey" you finally reply "it's been a while."

"I know right? Wasn't expecting to see you here though."

"I wasn't supposed to be here I guess... I might be leaving soon"

It seemed that Hyunjin understood the circumstances, it was reasonable your urge to leave. But at the same time, the night had just started and it's been a pretty long time since you last talked to everyone. They missed you. He missed you.

"At least have a drink with me" he proposes, already calling the bartender "I wanna know what you've been into." How could you say no?

So you and Hyunjin drank together while catching up with each other and God, you did miss a lot. Hyunjin was talking about every show they attended to while you gossiped about a drama that was happening in your work place. He showed pictures of his paintings while you showed pictures of your pets. He even gave you a minor spoiler of their next comeback. You laughed a lot during some hours.

While you were telling him about the last trip you did with some of your friends, a different song started playing and everyone got out of the center of the room. You looked at the commotion to find out it was when the just married couple begun their dance. You were observing them, so you failed to notice Hyunjin's gaze on you and his little smile. He truly missed you.

"Are you guys okay?"

You looked at him, taking a while to understand what he meant. By the time you comprehended it, he regretted and tried saying "I'm sorry, shouldn't have asked".

"We're okay" you answered "we should be at least."

"No hard feelings? Were you able to, you know, move on?"

"I'm moving on as we speak. I think this is my last chapter with him."

He was looking at you with curiosity. Like he actually wanted to understand your feelings, like he actually wanted to listen without judgements. So you kept explaining:

"Maybe I was ready for a while, I just didn't want to let go. I've never been good with changes. I just didn't want to lose the possibility of everything being fine without any change." you grew consciously of the man's attention on you, so you tried to brush it off by laughing "Sorry for the therapy session all of the sudden."

He giggled "Don't worry, I don't mind. I'm happy for you, to be able to keep going. Happy for both of you."

The dance was close to an end and everyone was cheering, but Changbin and his partner looked like they were in their own world, lost in each others embrace and smile. You could see their love in their eyes. That's what they deserved.

"I am happy too."

You were being genuine. Its like another weight was lifted off you. You were slowly collecting the pieces of your heart and putting them together. You were healing.

When the newlyweds finished their first dance as a married couple, the guests applauded in joy and went back to the dance floor when another song started playing. Hyunjin drank the last sip of the drink he ordered and stood up. You didn't want to admit but you were kinda disappointed that he was already going. You started to wonder if you had said anything wrong or said too much, that was until he offered his hand to you with a smile.

He saw your confused expression and explained it clearly“Let's dance. You're not planning on staying in this bar for the whole night, are you? ”

“I am, actually. Besides I'm going home soon, there's no need to-”

“C'mon Y/n. ” he interrupted you while moving forward to hold your hand “You cannot come to a wedding party and not dance to at least one song. I promise I'll stop bothering you after this.”

Hesitantly, you held his hand back and got up.

“Was my offer to stop bothering you so tempting? You're even smiling” he said, making you laugh.

“Shut up.”

The room was filled with couples and friends. You didn't notice that the song that was playing, falling in love by cigarettes after sex, required a slow dancing. You just noticed it after Hyunjin was really close to you, holding your waist with both hands and smiling dearly for you. You soon placed your hands in his shoulder.

“You weren't so bold before, you know.”

“What do you mean?”

“Normally you wouldn't invite someone to dance, you were always kinda shy. I remember I begged you to dance with me in my own birthday party and still you denied.”

“That was when I was a trainee, how do you even remember that?”

“Oh it made me cry for weeks”

He laughed, bringing you closer to him. You guys were barely dancing, you were just hugging each other and swinging from side to side.

“Were you always this dramatic?”

“You're one to talk.”

“Well...” Hyunjin said before sighing, like he was wondering what words to use for what he was about to say.“we can say that I regret not accepting your invite to dance back then. And who knows when I'll have another opportunity.”

You were the shy one now. You really didn't expect to Hyunjin to be so bold, even though he didn't say nothing considered too much and you probably were analysing to deeply. Trying to not blush, you decided to light the situation: "I say it was the alcohol that made you so straightforward."

"Oh that helped of course" he laughed. And you kept talking the most random things while being on each other's arms, dancing to a love song like it was something casual. When the first song came to an end, he was ready to say goodbye to you, even though that was the last thing he wanted in the moment.

"I don't mind dancing for another song" you said. You don't know what made you change your mind so quickly, but then you saw his smile and understood the change of heart. That smile was worth a lot of dances.

You probably danced for more than two hours. In slow songs you'd just hug each other while talking about your life, in happy songs you would dance like crazy and proceed to judge those who were better than you and sometimes you'd just follow hyunjin's lead to try to follow a dance routine. You just stopped when Hyunjin was covered in sweat and your feet couldn't handle anymore. Then you both went to the bar, laughing like that was the funniest thing to ever happen on your life.

"Y/N!"

Looking to the side, you were met with Yeji. You noticed that her breath wasn't even, which meant that she was probably looking for you for a while now.

“You're still friends with Yeji?”

“Yeah, we still go out sometimes. Why?”

“Just wanted to know.”

“I was looking for you everywhere” Yeji was now right in front of you, breathing heavily “Me and the girls are going back to the dorms, we need to be up early tomorrow. Do you want to go with us?”

You searched for your cell phone, wondering what time it was. It was a little bit past midnight. You wanted to be there for more time, you felt like the night was just starting, but sadly the Itzy girls were your only ride back home. That meant you needed to go now.

You glanced at Hyunjin, who was looking at with expectation. For a second you thought that he was trying to convince you to stay for a bit longer, to enjoy the night with him. But it couldn't be this, right? So you just brushed it off.

“Well, I'll be going then” he gave you a small smile, but he was averting his eyes, trying to not look directly at you, but still he got closer to hug you goodbye “I hope to see you around.”

“Don't go missing this time.”

You laughed at his little joke and he giggled back. You believe it would've been easier to go away if he kept looking at somewhere else, but now his eyes were on you and you felt like you couldn't move. You truly wished the night could be longer.

You had your thoughts interrupted when Yeji faked a cough by your side, making you and Hyunjin both come back to reality and making you get away from his arms. Only then you started to walk away, trying to not look as much as you could.

“Bye Hyunjin.”

He just nodded his head, trying to not say bye. You and Yeji started to walk away, saying goodbye to the ones you'd find in your way.

"Oh wait" you remembered your friend "I still have to congratulate Changbin and his partner, I didn't get the chance to do that earlier."

"They were talking to his parents last time I saw them. Do you feel better?"

"Kinda? I mean, it will take a while to be 100% over this but I already feel a weight off my shoulders."

Yeji smiled and, even though she didn't say anything else, you could see she was happy for your growth. Now you could only wish you would heal and find yourself in a better situation from now on. Maybe you could fall in love again, deeper than you've felt before.

Feedbacks and reblogs are very much appreciated!

[acerathia]

pink camellias || Chapter 4: sweet william

Chapter Summary:

sweet william: gallantry

Wordcount: 2.4k

Read on AO3 || Masterlist

Pairing:

Bakugou Katsuki / Reader

Tags/CW:

royalty au, inspired by Mulan, war and its consequences, violence, childhood friends to strangers to companions to lovers (i am sorry), Angst, Acts of Service, Character Death (Major, and Minor), swordfights, misogyny, f!reader, kidnapping, implied torture, let me know if I missed anything lol

Note:

this has been sitting in my drafts for way too long. so im gonna post the chapters i have o7

The next day, the actual training started. And you honestly didn’t expect the Captain to wake everyone at the crack of dawn, which was too early, even for you. But you prepared yourself for the training with no complaints, you were too tired to voice any of them anyway. So you washed your face and put some fresh clothes on, before heading to the training space.

The masses of people were filled with complaints and remarks. Denki had made his way to stand beside you, too groggy to say something just yet.

The Captain immediately raised his voice to get the attention of everyone, telling them to start the rounds, the same amount as the day before, and the last ones have to run a good amount more. Instantly everyone took their legs in their hands and hurried along the track. And you knew you could just start running and overtake them all, but you’d rather not end up too exhausted for the later exercises because there were surely other things you would have to absolve. So you stayed in the middle, with no risk of ending up last, but also not exerting yourself more than you usually would have.

After completing these rounds, and walking yourself down, you began to stretch before the rest of the group was done. Surprisingly the Captain even waited for the losers to finish their extra rounds, before he started the next portion: intense physical training.

Following the shouted instructions, you got into the positions, stretching, pulling, stemming. And for some reason the Captain always seemed to find something wrong with your form, often taking your arms between his and correcting the way you’re holding stuff. His hands were warm and you could even feel the callouses through the fabric you’re wearing. The worst thing about his help was the way he seems to trample on your dignity, a scoff ready on his face every time he walked past you, and just for that, you were barely affected with the way his breath felt on your neck, or how big the size difference between you both was.

At some point, it almost felt like his hand was fixed to your back, with the amount of correction he seems to be doing. And it was starting to grate on you, because he made you look incompetent with every push of his, with every remark. But you persevered, you put more effort into everything, fully aware that nothing would truly satisfy him, yet you challenged that boundary, pushed against it every day, with every task, with every straining muscle.

So once he announced that the first phase of training had been successfully carried out, you stood tall amongst the survivors, as many have given up during the borderline torture the Captain called training. Now the rest of you had the true honor of finally starting phase two, the phase where everyone would be sharpening their skill.

Days after days everyone honed their skill in hand-to-hand combat, preparing you for the last desperate attempt to save your life. And gradually the Captain allowed you to use weapons, one by one. Daggers with poison on their blade, swords, claymores, and even archery. Everyone found the right weapon for themselves, despite having the basic amount of training for each mastery.

You stayed loyal to the sword, always on the high ground in terms of skill due to your years of training. At first, being better in that skill gave you the feeling of superiority, but after a while it turned into dull boredom. So, you decided to finally try something new, to achieve a new skill with a new weapon. That was how you choose your new weapon, purely out of spite, as the others suggested you take up archery, and you couldn’t help but notice the condescension in their tone. Still, you thanked them for their suggestion, only to grab an ax, letting the weight sink into your palm before you simply walked past the group of trainees.

And at first it was difficult. The center of gravity differed from the one of a sword, impacting your accuracy, while the weight pulling down on one side made the lifting of the weapon much more difficult. But you prevailed. You continued to hone your skills with the ax, to strengthen your muscles, to get used to the balance of it, and you learned how to throw the ax, so that the blade always hit the target with proper might, how to swing it against a bigger opponent, how to use the knowledge of weak points to the advantage of this different blade. And of course, you trained to be able to switch between the two weapons without a break to adjust.

As much as you wanted to claim this achievement as your own, you had to admit that the Captain's advice did help you occasionally. He had helped you at the beginning with your stance, standing behind you, his palms barely touching the back of your hands as he showed you how to hold the ax to stabilize it as much as possible, and how to have the best grip. His breath fanned over your face as he slowly told you how to swing. Suddenly you were too aware of his presence, but you guided your focus back to your swing, taking a couple of them to get a handle of the motion, before the Captain stepped back and you finally threw the weapon towards the target. Whirling through the air in a smooth motion, it didn’t actually hit dead center, but close enough, so you couldn’t help the little celebratory jump at achieving this hit. But then you made eye contact with the blond, and you immediately stiffened up, trying to regain your appearance by simply thanking him and turning away to get your ax.

“Hold on, princess, let’s cross swords,” he calls out to you, and for once this didn’t seem like a command and more like a request.

And at first you ruminated the thought of straight-up refusing him, but you couldn’t let the opportunity to duel with another skilled swordfighter slip between your fingers. So, still not wanting to give him the satisfaction of outright agreeing with something he said, you just shrug and change your direction to grab your sword. With your sword in hand you returned to him, his own weapon ready in his hand, in a fighting stance before you even arrived close enough for any of you to attack.

For a moment you both just stared at each other, measuring the opponent, their stance. His footwork was solid, heavy yet light, ready to dodge, attack whenever needed. You doubted you could throw him off-balance with any of your swift tricks.

Your gaze shifted, grazing his slim waist to focus on his broad shoulders and his trained arms. He was used to applying force, yet seemed to know how to manage it. A flicker at the back of your mind wondered what else he could use that strength for, and you quenched it before it even had the possibility to ignite into something more fierce.

And then you looked at his face, his tense jaw, and his sparkling red eyes, resembling the depth of the fire, of explosions wracking the enemy line. Making eye contact a smirk formed on his face, plush lips stretching to flash his canines. Then he swung.

Only your reflexes saved you from being cut, shallow, yet a sign-off to your victory. His blade clashed with yours and he pushed. The sword scarred each other, enticing sparks, and you dug your heels into the ground.

His breath fanned over your face, barely avoiding the blades in front of you, and you scowled, staring right into his eyes full of fire and crunching autumn leaves. Honey seemed to outline them in daring lines, dripping down his forehead only to get brushed aside by the slight breeze.

And you were well aware of the grin resting on his face, despite the swords hiding the lower half of his face, despite your own scowl mirrored by the blade, fitting itself over his features. He was so sure of this victory, so sure of your loss, the glee is filling his eyes. The glee about finally putting you to your place, about showing you how you don’t belong to this place. And this glee pumped steam through your veins, melting your muscles, but reinforcing them the same.

And you returned his push with one of your own, noticing the furrow of his brows, the smirk sliding into a scowl. But now your own grin forms, showing you a warped picture of him smiling at you.

With a sudden movement he thrusted you away from him and you stumbled. Before you had regained your balance, he already hooked his sword with yours, like a knot, pulling it tight and away from you.

So you couldn’t do anything but raise your hands in surrender as the tip of his blade pointed towards your throat.

No matter how much you despised him, you acknowledged his mastery in swordsmanship. The way he swung his sword with precision and almost seemed able to predict the movement of his opponents just entranced you. Not that you would ever admit that outloud.

That was why you snarled at him, pushing the blade away, carefully only touching the flat side. And yet he suddenly jerked it away.

“Don’t be foolish, have you no knowledge about swords, or is your head filled with straw?” he barked, acting as if you just put your fingers around the sword without reason or rhyme.

But you were well aware of how swords work, and his words only aggravated you. With a grumble you waited until he put his sword away to jump at him, grabbing his hair between your fingers.

You wanted to kick your knee into his stomach, but he managed to block that hit with one of his palms, grabbing your leg and yanking, taking your balance away.

You simply tightened your grip on his head and swung your other leg to hit his right side, where it was supposed to hurt the most. This time he wasn’t fast enough to block that hit, and a groan escaped him, trying not to twist with pain, not to give you more leverage. But no matter how much he had tried, he lost his balance and toppled over.

In this fall, he saw the opportunity to grab your wrists, as your grasp on his hair had weakened with your surprise. Twisting your fall he managed to pin you under him, but with a twist of your body you easily threw him off.

This time you were the one pinning him to the ground, but due to the difference in strength he overpowers you once again. And you both continued to tumble through the dirt, your nimbleness winning over his strength, but his strength overpowering yours.

At some point you both just flopped onto the ground beside each other, tiredness winning this contest. Didn’t mean you stopped yourself from sending a light kick his way, as a way to still claim victory if anyone asks. And he didn’t kick you back, rather he drove his elbow into yours with purpose, hitting the funny bone.

A groan escaped you and you held your arm close to your chest, glaring at his satisfied smirk.

“Looks like I still won, princess,” he declared and sat up with a swing.

“You only won because you fought dirty.” You acted as if you weren’t the one who had initiated this whole brawl to begin with, as if you weren’t the one playing dirty in the first place.

“Tch, keep thinking that, you’re just mad you didn’t win,” he shot back. He stood up and had started doing stretches to cool down, and you couldn’t help but to watch the way his back bends, the way his muscles shift smoothly underneath his linen shirt, grime plastered all over it. “And, there is no dirty fight in a war, m’lady.”

You scoffed because despite the form of address, he was making fun of you for being naive, in his opinion. You were aware of that, yet there was nothing you could do to convince him otherwise, because for some people your skills didn’t matter, no matter how much you tried. Everything ran the same course, the same way. To them you were nothing but a pretty face, an asset to keep. Even if you had hoped it would be different once you proved yourself. But alas, the situation didn’t change, so you had to act like always.

Standing up, you began to go through your cool-down routine too, your back turned to him, because you didn’t know if you could school your facial expressions if he said anything again. Once you made sure your body had cooled down, you bowed down to pick up your sword, which was stuck in the mud a couple of meters away. Taking the weapon into your hand you quickly assessed the blade, considering cleaning it later before sheathing it. So with your sword in hand you walked the rest of the distance to the target to also pick up the ax you had thrown before the fight had broken out. This one you had to return.

Turning around to return it to its rightful place, you made eye contact with the Captain, whose face for once wasn’t etched in a scowl, but more calm, and you couldn’t help but frown at this rare sight. Your reaction seemed to break him out whatever stupor he had put himself into, and the used scowl returned, even if there was something different about it. But if you were going to be honest, you had no desire to discover what might have elicited that change in him, so you simply walked past him to the little hut where the weapons were stored, putting your ax back where you found it.

After you emerged from the storage, the Captain was gone already, you couldn’t help but look for him the moment you stepped out. You simply sighed at the disappearance, not understanding why it mattered that much, letting your gaze wander to the sky, to the evening blooming across the sky. And the red reminded you of a certain sparkle, of a certain intensity. Your heart shook inside your rib cage. You frowned, was your cool-down insufficient? With that you tried to distract yourself from the blazing fire, from the honey dripping.

[shera-dnd]

I'm really sorry to post my replies with images deemed NSFW.

Long story short - Varvara is being pretty much converted using Kyouka as a medium (indirect kiss etc.).

That is creepy and disgusting and should not be viewed as a Bi representation but as something homophobic and harmful.

It is even more creepy and disgusting when You took into this equation that Yuuki pretty much knew how she felt about Kyouka and even approved of said feelings.

Long story short - he should demand nothing, yet he demanded everything.

Once again and this time for the last - dont treat it as a Bi rep but as a something creepy and disgusting. And dont be okay with that.

Thank You.

Well good morning, this was the first thing I saw when I woke up. I feel like a lot of people would have chosen violence upon seeing this, but arguing with or venting at someone on the internet has never solved anything, so how about we make a learning experience out of this?

Okay so, no I did not delete your asks because they had NSFW imagery, I deleted them because they came across as very angry and accusatory

Now I'm not gonna hold that against you right now and we're just gonna have a chat. You said you were an ally to the LGBT community, so I hope that you will sit down and listen to what I have to say. You're free to disagree and argue, but at least listen first

On the point you are trying to make about that scene in the manga. I've decided to catch up on it so I could talk about it properly

And I have to say that I do not see it. Like I believe the term you're looking for is less "conversion therapy" and more "corrective rape". The idea that you can fuck the gay out of a woman is deeply gross and the fact people genuinely believe that is horrifying

BUT I don't think that's what's going on in that scene. It's framed as yet another reward, which as usual exists outside of the control of any of the characters and lands entirely in the box of "things the author thought would be hot at the moment"

It is also expressly said that they're "punishing" each other so that they can better serve Kyouka, once again centering their attraction not on each other, but on someone else

Considering also that from that point on nothing has happened to indicate Varvara was any more into Yuuki or any less into Kyouka than any time before that scene

Now as much as I loved to joke about and headcanon Varvara as a lesbian, I was never under any illusion that the ecchi femdom slave kink manga would give me proper lesbian representation.

Varvara had only expressed attraction to women before and now she showed attraction to a man, to me that shows less lesbian conversion and more like one of those tumblr bi women who absolutely adore women and also have that one pathetic man they're into

The way I read this it's whatever

But you read it differently and you have every right to be grossed out. You have every right to be angry and to drop the manga entirely. I'm not here to defend Mato Seihei no Slave

But I have to ask, as an ally, did you come to me because you wanted the genuine opinion of a queer person? or did you do it because you wanted a queer person to validate the opinion you already had?

Just, you know, do some self reflection on that

Anyways back to Chained Soldier, I'll admit there's plenty of gross shit in it. Like jesus fuck have you seen all the reward scenes with Ren??? and I'll fully admit that the manga is capital P Problematic

I just think that the way we should deal with problematic media is not by shutting it down entirely, but by actually engaging with it, understanding what makes it problematic, and making sure that we don't internalize those parts of it

Problematic media can have a lot of good stuff in it besides all the nasty bits, we just gotta like know how to engage with it in a way that doesn't like change our views for the worse

As for the impact this could have on its readers and how they treat lesbians in real life. I don't think anyone who reads this and actually engages with it will come on to any lesbians and be gross to them, because well Yuuki doesn't come on to... anyone actually.

Our boy is very passive about everything that happens and will downright refuse any sexual advances that are not tied to the rewards. He did not initiate the stuff with Varvara and did not force himself on her

And the people who WOULD come on to lesbians and think they can "set them straight", I don't think they need a manga to validate their disgusting beliefs

But you also said you wanted to contact LGBT organizations in Japan to help fight against this kind of stuff, and you know what you got the spirit there

I don't think a manga being gross is even on the top like 100 things those organizations are trying to deal with in that country, and even if it was there are waaaaaaaay bigger and nastier manga to deal with first

But hey that doesn't mean these people can't use our support, so please consider donating to Stone Wall Japan and Japan Pride House, both organizations that try to help queer people, as well as J-ALL which is trying to help grant legal protections to LGBT+ people in Japan

I'll be posting links at the end of this post and will happily signal boost any other japanese charities sent my way

And just as another note at the end

I disabled anon asks for a reason, and you creating an alt account just to send me an ask is extremely shady behavior. That's a boundary I have set that you chose to disrespect and I have every reason to block you for it. I won't, because I genuinely think you're just a person trying to learn and be validated in your opinion, but just don't do that kind of shit again

anyways I hope you take at least some of what I've said to heart and here are the donation links!

[mauesartetc]

I've seen it stated in a comment on reddit that Blitzo "deserved what happened to him at Ozzie’s. He forced himself on M&M’s date and then went out of his way to draw attention to himself KNOWING fizz was there. The entire event was a result of his own actions. Hell, Stolas treated it as an actual date and at least tried to make an effort to be sweet."

They also said:

""I’d like an acknowledgment of Blitz being the one who was in the wrong and admitting it himself. Stolas may be an out of touch rich aristocrat yes, but Blitz was neglecting him and taking advantage from the start. Stolas arguably had no reason to suspect that objectifying blitz was a problem considering he never seemed bothered by it until Ozzy’s. I’d like to think the hospital scene is what is starting the process of Stolas finally realizing blitz can’t be helped until he helps up himself and deals with his issues."

And I'm like: wtf? Are you seriously making Stolas into the injured party despite all the cr*p he has done? Hes the one who has apologizing to do; for objectifying and fetishizing Blitzo all while looking down on imps.

The last part stinks of not wanting white/privileged people to take accountability for microaggressions based on the excuse of them being "innocent".

Sorry, I know this is wildly beside the point, but:

cr*p

Dude, this is Tumblr, not TikTok. You don't have to censor yourself here. You don't have to make every word you write commercially viable. It's okay. Be free, little bird! Spew expletives left and right if you feel so moved!

I want everyone to feel free to speak their minds on this blog, and if that includes a few naughty words, so be it. Besides, I'm pretty sure no one's getting in trouble at work for reading a post that contained the word "crap".

Anyway, to the more pressing issue at hand: It's important to recognize at all times that these are fictional characters, not real people. They are puppets whose actions are dictated by writers. Yes, giving characters the illusion of agency when writing stories is a great way to engage your audience, but when analyzing stories, you have to focus on why the people who wrote them made the choices they did. Debating which character was in the wrong, or which character was more wrong, or which one should apologize, yadda yadda yadda, is a futile fucking exercise if you don't include the writers' intent in that conversation.

Let's look at Blitzo. He pretty objectively caused most of what went down at Ozzie's. He followed Moxxie and Millie, he invited Stolas, he drew attention to himself when he knew people who hated him were present. Now that last one seems pretty stupid, like the kind of mistake no one of sound mind in the real world would ever reasonably make. We could spend all day speculating what about his personality would lead him to do this, whether it's zero sense of self-preservation, a subconscious desire for self-sabotage, or simple inability to keep his damn mouth shut, but here's the thing: Other Helluva Boss characters have the same problem. To reiterate what I said here:

"Why did Octavia fully forgive her dad, no questions asked, even when he couldn't explain why he cheated on her mom? If Loona hates being around Blitzo so much, why didn't she just stay with the succubi on the beach? [...] Why did Moxxie make a huge romantic gesture in an environment where such gestures are frowned upon? [...] Why did Stolas bring an imp to a couples-only club despite knowing it'd ruin his reputation?"

The answer to all these questions is "because the plot demanded it." The writers wanted a certain outcome and wrote themselves into a corner before they could reach it organically. Instead of putting themselves into the characters' shoes or retracing their steps to make the endpoint feel like a logical conclusion, they just said "fuck it" and brute-forced the easiest solution, causing the result to make no goddamn sense.

Given the level this writing is on, it feels kinda pointless to argue with internet strangers over which character was in the right and which one wasn't. Subsequent episodes haven't addressed the events of "Ozzie's" (at least not in a way that means anything), leading me to believe the writers never cared enough about them to spark any sort of in-depth conversation. So why should we?

Honestly, this person just sounds like a Stolas simp. It's kind of a leap to assume they don't want real people of a certain race and class to bear responsibility for their actions. It's not that deep. None of this is that deep.

[defensivelee]

custom collar and pet name for the whump bingo

of course :D i'll give the 'pet name' snippet its own post, so look out for that too !! this is the collar prompt sjkjsjsjkd

for my MENHERAMEN readers, this will be easier to understand... if you haven't read it, basically this is a scene after Bentinck kidnaps Marly. by this point Hansi's kind of fully lost it and takes out a lot of his frustrations on Marly! however, as the story is technically finished, i've made a separate AU where Marly sticks a little longer with Bentinck and.... even more messed up things happen.

CW: implied/referenced murder, implied/referenced torture, mentions of abusive relationships, dehumanization, conditioning, non-sexual nudity.

Marly heard the door open behind him, rousing him from his nap. He had been lying on the floor beside Bentinck’s bed, from where he’d taken a pillow and a blanket. It had been...not explicitly allowed, but as Bentinck hadn’t caused much of a stir when Marly started doing it, he thought it was fine.

“Sir,” he murmured as he sat up, rubbing at his eyes. Bentinck was standing over him, speaking into his phone. He held a plastic bag in his hands, and Marly wondered what he had bought today.

Another knife? His hands came to brush over his thighs. It had actually been a while since Bentinck had cut into him, just for the fun of it. Actually, Marly didn’t know why he still did it— he thought he had been obedient at the end of each day, and Bentinck no longer seemed to find any joy in it. It was like something he was obligated to do now, like he was under the orders of someone else.

Marly could have known that someone else, once. Someone named James. Beautiful, outrageous James, dying bloodlessly under the water. He would have liked the blade, with his increasingly violent fantasies, the rough whispers in bed.

Nothing like Sarah, telling him to leave, to go, there’s your chance, escape—

“I’m sorry, sir,” he blurted.

Bentinck scowled at him, dismissing whoever it was on the phone. Marly guessed it was Keppel; the two seemed inseparable now, as much as Marly wished they would separate.

“Sorry? Sorry for what?” Bentinck asked. “What did you do?”

“I thought of escape today,” Marly said. “Just now, in fact.”

“Oh, did you?” Bentinck smiled, and Marly swallowed, dropping his gaze to the ground. Had he just ended the perfect, nearly peaceful streak? Well, he had to say something. It had been ordered of him. He knew what would happen if he kept all his confessions to himself.

Still, he couldn’t help but run a finger over the scarring wounds on his bare thighs and shudder.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “Sir. Really sorry.”

“Well, you know...” Bentinck looked away, towards the window. “I’m not feeling it so much tonight. It’s fine. I mean, you told me as soon as you thought of it.”

Marly looked up, his eyes widening. “Thank you, sir,” he said. “Thank you, thank you—” He couldn’t let Bentinck forget how much this meant to him.

“Ugh, okay, enough.” Bentinck sat back on the bed, and Marly hesitated before shifting forward and lying his head on his master’s lap.

His master. That was still something to get used to. It was sort of...nice, how thoughtless the term was.

“I know that none of your...escape fantasies could ever happen, anyway,” Bentinck said, falling back on the bed as he ran a hand over Marly’s matted hair. “Not anymore. Were I in your place, I wouldn’t even know what to do with myself. As it is, I’ve marked you as mine.”

“Yours, yes,” Marly agreed. He narrowed his eyes and felt as if he wanted to rip off the hand over his head with his teeth. Like a dog, just any dog, but more than anything a whipped, whining creature.

And, like a dog—

“I’ve brought you something to help with that,” Bentinck went on, sitting up. He reached into his bag and lifted out a collar, a dark blue one made of...nylon. Nothing remarkable, really, save for the silver heart hanging from it. As it caught the light, Marly saw his own name reflected back at him.

That’s...for me?

“Lift your head,” Bentinck said.

Should I? He was worth more than this, wasn’t he? People would still be looking for a lost dog.

“Listen up,” Bentinck snapped, slapping him on the side of his head. Marly winced and obeyed, lifting his head up and closing his eyes.

“You know, isn’t it nice?” Bentinck said as he snapped the collar around Marly’s neck, pushing his hair out of the way. He adjusted it so that the heart dangled over his chest. “You’re more secure than most university students! And all you have to do is wear this.”

“Yes, sir.” Marly opened his eyes and looked down at the collar. Blue, like green, was not his color, either.

He should have been grateful, to have been given anything to wear at all, but if anything he felt more exposed now, and his face flushed.

Bentinck stared at him for a moment, then pushed him to the side, standing back up again. “I’m having Arnold over,” he said. “Go hide.” He sneered down at him. “I can’t believe you just fucking take it.”

[trans-leek-cookie]

its past midnight and time to yap about Mouthwashing. Anyway obviously we don't see the Specific Events only how the characters react but with Anya... Okay I'm going to talk about the Sexual Assault not with Specific Details but that's what the post is about so

Anyways she reads to me as very like... trying to downplay the severity to herself. Like thinking through it (not having the exact quotes but) I feel like it'd be an unfortunately natural reaction- if you were stuck with 4 guys and the guy with the second highest position on the ship assaulted you depending on the situation. I feel like its not hard to imagine you'd try and reframe it as Less Bad to cope because let me be honest if I had to confront the implications of that, mainly the fact he could do it again and I wouldn't have any real way of dealing with it without complicating things even further bc he doesn't just have a close relationship with the guy with the Most Power on the ship, he also is in charge of keeping Me and The Other People On The Ship Safe, i would be in deep denial just to not lose my god damn mind like thats so fucking scary. And then the implication you tried to talk to the captain and even if he wasn't cruel he didn't Understand the Severity of what you were suggesting is like. Besides feeling afraid it could genuinely really fuck with my own perception bc like "if this guy who I trust says he's not a bad person maybe I'm just overreacting?" is. Again unfortunately understandable.

And again I'll say that Anya fully breaks down when the news breaks that pony express is fucked and like. 1. I think that's related to her own finances (and also. Literally just realized the way an abortion could interact badly with "no savings" like I Just Processed that fact. Like I knew "oh if she couldn't abort having to support a child wouldn't just be traumatic but also fucking nightmarish finance wise" but even having an abortion could make things so much harder.) 2. Jimmy LASHES OUT at Curly OPENLY. again based on my interpretation of Mildly In Denial To Cope this would. Like. Really fuck with that because it goes from "I trust the captain and I don't want to be afraid of my crewmate for a year" to "oh he is willing to verbally abuse the captain, who is his friend" and realizing I wasn't overreacting.

I also wanna point to the dead pixel conversation and obv it's symbolic but idk if it's meant as "there's a dead pixel that Anya noticed and she's using the topic to like test the waters" or if it's "anya is literally just trying to figure out Curly's thought process" which isn't like super important but like. Focusing on the way she starts the conversation by saying that she "Likes the illusion the screen has". (I don't remember the exact words sorry) But that's really interesting to me bc obviously you can read into Curly not seeing the dead pixel and instead focusing on the bigger picture (and how the dead pixel "doesn't ruin the illusion") but I think it's really interesting that Anya starts by talking Positively about the screen even though the dead pixel is there (and she can't stop thinking about it)

Like thinking through implications option 1: she's talking about the screen and uses the dead pixel to get a feel for how Curly responds to her bringing up issues

2: she's being entirely metaphorical and still trying to sort of self soothe- seeking external validation that the dead pixel Isn't Actually That Big A Deal (and therefore she's just overthinking)

3: idk how to phrase this exactly but ppl have talked Abt the way she talks to Jimmy, how it indicates a sort of "Fawn" response where she tries to keep him calm with compliments and stuff, and her talking about "enjoying the illusion" is her trying to do something similar with Curly- essentially starting the metaphor by downplaying the issue

Anyway. I don't know if I have a full conclusion but another thing is I think ppl need to acknowledge that while Curly fucked up and harmed Anya (mainly thru inaction). He's not uniquely shitty. Most people will be in a situation where they act similarly, and that DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS. I AM NOT SAYING CURLY IS ANY BETTER. I am saying that you need to be able to recognize your capacity for harm thru inaction and understand that like. He's not uniquely terrible he's just Normal Levels Of Unhelpful, which in a situation like Anya's is Dangerous

Like. Basically you can say "fuck jimmy fuck curly" all you want but you need to be able to understand that everyone including yourself has the same capacity for harm

[arleniansdoodles]

(Warning this is super long I'm so sorry) Absolutely mcfreaking reeling from that charged backfist of a chapter. I have no words. Yang what. What is wrong with you. He really slaughtered five schools' worth of students and masters, killed his adoptive father, orchestrated the murder of his little sister, secretly went back and raised said little sister from the dead, decided to let her wake up ALONE IN A POOL OF HER OWN BLOOD SURROUNDED BY THE BODIES OF HER FAMILY, left her to fend for herself at the ripe age of 11, and then fucked off to the mountains to be a super-doctor. BROTHER. Like yes Yang, it was really cold of Sifu to not let you save your family with the talisman, and your feelings of heartbreak and betrayal are absolutely valid (I would even excuse the attempted theft of the talisman honestly, he was just trying to save them!) especially when he saw you as a son, BUT HOLY SHIT YOUR RESPONSE WAS TO BECOME A MASS-MURDERER! Yin and all those disciples didn't know anything about the talismans, you could have just killed the masters in a slightly less public way and have been basically fine! Jinfeng literally has Infinite Money Glitch: The Talisman, you guys can pay off anyone! I'm so flabbergasted at Yang I can't even express it fully. How do we come back from this bro 😭 I know Fajar actually did kill Yin and now they're besties, but Yang literally left her in a wuguan full of bodies!!!! She could've died or gone insane and Yang just allowed it! How tf was she supposed to turn away from vengeance when that's literally all you left her with! And the fact that she managed to do that anyway and you're just???? Punishing her for it in every way besides physically attacking her????

You know what? I'm gonna go fight Yang a bunch until I get an achievement or something, he deserves it!

Hehehehehehhh XDDD This was me while reading through your message lmaooo:

That said, I think you're probably the first person I've seen who's gotten this angry at Yang (aside from a few other characters in the fic)! 😂 Game-wise, him reviving Yin in the prologue made the most sense to me out of all the other theories (not that there are a lot imo), and it also works with the implications of the post-credits scene, so I was more than ready to add it to the fic with maximum angst! XDD

Of course, this all means Yang is an even bigger douche than before 😅 There were a million other ways he could've gone about stealing the talismans without ruining Yin's life, but ah well, I had to stick to that part of canon for this fic 😂 I personally think he didn't have this mindset eight years ago; like, how much of his current thinking is actually him and how much is part of the talisman's influence? But even then, it was still a horrible move to make, especially where Yin was concerned (hence why I came up with the Dawn!AU where she lives! hehe). And his entire arc overall was one of my struggling points while writing, because how DO you come back from this? How do you have the happy ending with all the fluffy rainbow and unicorn feels?? Would a happy ending for this even be happy for Yin and Yang's relationship after all he's done to her? So that was quite interesting and tricky to work with XDD

All in all, I'm happy you enjoyed this chapter!! Though I'm sorry it got you worked up loll 😅 Hopefully beating Yang to a pulp helps! 😁 And no worries at all about the long messages; I really appreciate you taking the time to write all this!! Thanks again! 💗💗

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

Re reading book 2 and I swear Jesse's first appearance is SO different from how he is now! He appears so Cool and secretive from the Dork I know now! How he walks with his hand in his pockets and talks to Cole or broke up the fight between Olivia and Kai! Did you decide to change his personality through the storie or is this just his true self that gets revealed after hanging out with the Ninja? because he seems to act more dorky with new people too now

"Okay, wait, wait, wait!" Nya exclaims, frantically poking at her bracelet. How can they just fight without analyzing the situation?! “We got a ping about the Shark Activity earlier, and—" "Oh! Yeah, that was, uh, me, actually," says Fuchsia, shrugging as he ducks under the swing of a chainsaw. "I was trying to wait around for help, but these guys were about to start attacking the arcade, so—yeah. I may have jumped the gun a bit.” Fuchsia shrugs with a wide grin, yelping as he swerves away from a swinging morning star. 

. . .

"WAAAAAAAAA!" wails Fuchsia on his way down, still screaming even when he lands in Cole's arms. When he finally catches the amused way Cole's staring at him, Fuchsia coughs and abruptly turns away. "Ahahaha. Um, well…nice catch?" "Thanks. You weren't so bad yourself out there," Cole says, smiling with his eyes. "You're okay, right?" Fuchsia blinks, hoping his blush can't be seen behind his mask. "I, er, uh…yeah! Fine! Totally fine! Super fine. Fine as fine can be!"

. . .

“…I’m sorry, I have a tendency to creep up on people unexpectedly. I didn’t mean to scare you,” the boy laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. “My name’s Jesse Marvell, and I was looking to be the new secretary, if you'll have me.” “You seem a bit…sneaky to be a secretary,” Zane says bluntly. Jesse sticks out his tongue. “Aw come on, don’t be like that! I really can’t help it! But besides that, I am pretty good with people, and organizing things, and memorizing stuff, honest! And, you never know…” Jesse spins around once, stopping only to strike a pose. “…I just might surprise you!”

...nah, always been a giant dork. Though he just has less incentive to try and hide that about him as time goes on (especially because Cole finds it endearing shgfhgfds)

That being said, I did reaaaaally struggle with early!Jesse because I wasn't even sure I could sell anyone on his character (and I kind of had to give myself space to backpedal if it didn't pan out), but sometime in April '22 I just decided to fully commit to the bit because I loved what he brought to the table and doubled down on just going ham with him when I could, and look at us now :V

Also he only reason he broke up that fight with Kai and Olivia was because he was annoyed with them snjhhgfdjhgf (and the meta reason was to let people know he was also in that class lol), BUT it also started the precedent of him acting as the group mediator, as seen in the True Potential Arc (post-Zane and during Cole's), and various points vs the Great Devourer.

And I mean, something similar happened with Olivia–she was far more "cold and calculating" in Book 1, but after her dynamic with Kai kinda took off, she's become the loud, abrasive, snarky individual we know now...and that's why Bridget now exists, to fill in the more analytical aspects of Olivia's role that would've died otherwise T-T)9

Anyway anyway, back to Jesse, I started writing all those sidestories about him to give myself a better foundation for his character even if most of them are Cole-related and to help anchor down the direction I wanted to take with him. Supplementing an existing character's growth is one thing; trying to do it from scratch? Exceedingly intimidating.

But, all has seemed to have gone well! And if nothing else, at least there's visible growth/change! :D

(...and it's not like he isn't still secretive–Kai's onto him for that much ;P)