#sorry my English actually sucks
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you wanted batman sooo i give you;
Tim being Red Hood in Reverse Robins AUs is a crime. And here's why; Baby Jason is RIGHT THERE with more older brothers than he knows what to do with. Let him die. Let the characters keep their own backstories and personalities, and let that affect how they treat each other in those Reverse Robins AUs; let Damian be one of the most well adjusted members of the family, since he came to his father at a young age and since he was the only child, he had the full attention of Bruce. Let Tim come along when Damian is like, 17 and in medical/veterinarian/art school. Maybe Tim has an angsty arc, but let it be something related to say ,the league of assassins, or losing all his friends (Kon and Bart), or his parents dying, or all of that. Maybe even a Joker Jr thing if you REALLY need him to be spicy, i dunno. Or go more into it with the LOA. Then let Jason come along and just be. Loved by all of them? It makes more sense for THESE CHARACTERS to actually really like Jason, unlike when Dick never really got to know him THAT well, Tim and Damian like him immediately. And then let Jason die. He dies HORRIBLY. And then a few months later Dick comes along, and This is what causes strife in the family. Damian and Tim see him as a replacement for Jason, and they're mad at bruce for it. I imagine they'd come around qucikly enough tho. None can resist Dick Grayson's charm lmao. But then Jason comes back, and he is so so so mad at them for replacing him. They loved him, he KNOWS they loved him, but they... replaced him that easily? Except they ALSO killed the joker (Damian and Tim have come so close to that line, and its not like Damian's never killed before, so this also causes some strife in the fam with Bruce) So we have this smol child becoming a crime lord, but not one that wants revenge or anything to do with the bats. One that believes he was unloved and replaceable, one that maybe despises dick grayson, wants to be dick grayson, but can't bring himself to harm the family who he once loved, who once loved HIM. cue angst. tl;dr, let Jason keep his story and it is SO MUCH BETTER than tim FREAKING drake becoming red hood. P.s. i just saw that u wanted ppl to talk abt batman on my dash so idk ur view on reverse robins at all lmao. sorry if u like tim as red hood ig. not rlly tho. this is better.
Yes yes yes yes yes!!!
Omg I frikin love you.
It actually feels like all the reverse Robin aus are written by Tim stans who desperately want to give this character surface level angst.
Broski had this entire arc with Red Robin and they just ignore it in favor of making him Jason 2.0?
Itâs like theyâre desperate to keep the same dynamics and events as in the non-au but then itâs just pointless?ďżź
Tbh the entire reverse Robin thing is kinda watered down. And if you really wanna give someone Jasonâs arc give it to Steph. That at least makes move sense then Mr nepobaby over there.
(Wrote this tired- might edit later to make more concise and fix grammar)ďżź
#JJ was just Jason with Timâs name tbh#tho I do completely support fandoms repurposing it for Tim#sorry my English actually sucks#batfam#batman#tim drake#bruce wayne#dc robin#dc comics#jason todd#red robin#crowbar victim#red hood#joker junior#reverse robins
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i'd do anything for you, mrs highness
thinking about the possibilities of the dream sequence uh some weeks after we already saw what the dream sequence entailed
+bonus another post-promo art that I never posted under the cut yayy !!
#toh#the owl house#actually this drawing is like. few weeks too but i'm posting it now cause i'm slow at posting B)#luz noceda#hunter toh#stringbean#golden guard and emperor fucked up momento!!#my art#emperor belos#he's kinda there. his shadow at least#very sorry about the ids if they suck. i try sometimes but 1) I can't describe stuffâ 2) English isn't my first language đ
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I am exhausted, good heavens.
#hey watch this neat trick I can do [cries]#love that for me#BUT#BUT- the actual EFFORT I put these days to not make a suicide jokes is *chefs kiss* phenomenal#actively shitting bricks as I physically have to stop myself from saying I want a car to hit me for the 50th time that day#I am not progressing any more than I am downgressing or whatever the opposite word is. but girlies#and boysies and peepsies#my lipgloss is popping and my eyebags are gucci- and so I shall prevail#MAN this tiredness is BONE DEEP man- it's like it's engraved into my goddamn clavicles#sorry that was like the only bone name I could remember- I don't even know what a clavicle is#anyways- I need to fall asleep forever and never wake up. But not in like a dying way#I just need to stop waking up tired and being tired and going to sleep tired and living tired like GIRL#WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN SLEEP STOPS SLEEPING#I JUST SLEPT 10 HOURS HOW ARE YOU STILL TIRED#I am so tired that i stopped liking shit- like that SUCKS my dudes#I sometimes Don't Like art now and that is WILD to me because that was lowkey the One Thing that got me going#I used to actually LIKE english class! and reading Shakespear and shit!!!! and history class!! Now I don't!! Where did the spark go??????#Now everything feels like a chooooooore and it sucks major dick#and my graaaades are slipping because I stopped giving a damn but I NEED. TO. GIVE. A. DAMN#because those are like highkey lowkey and every-other-key my grades and I need them to go into uni so I don't die <333#I need to spite little mini me who said I wasn't going to live past 13 because BITCH- guess how old I'm turning next week????????#THAT'S RIGHT- 17 YEARS OLD- FUCK YEAH BABY I'M STILL NOT DEAD#SUCK MY BIG ASS SHLONG MINI-ME#and then I have a big biology exam the day after so- funnnnn!!#anywho- should I tag this as vent? this probably counts as vent right? like among us? impostor and shit?#sorry I think my brain is actively rotting out of my ears right now#vent post#personal vent#tw vent#tw sui talk
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hello if you dont mind me asking what is the au you uploaded art of about
hullo!
yeah sure! im really happy that someone asked about it! :3
its basically uni beatles au with language major Paul, art major John, engineering major George, and hairdresser near the campus Ringo
the plot is about s3r!al k!ll3r paul getting caught by john k!ll!ng yet another victim and now hes hunting him down by playing "cat & mouse" game; where john, whos playing the mouse role must hide from paul, whos playing the cat role, in the campus area. If he got caught, he would get k!lled. The twist is that there are unexpected participants joining the game; george and ringo, who turned out to be still in the campus area.
why geo and rings are still in the campus area?
paul buried the victim body near ringo's barber shop, then ringo discovered it. And at a totally-not-perfect timing, george shows up and saw the scene of ringo with his professor d3ad body. And welp, he passed out and ringo took him to the nearest med centre which is in the campus area.
in conclusion: john, george and ringo trying to survive from paul's sick game for one night on the campus!
#i actually really wanted to make a fic out of it#but i dont really got time to write it lately#and my english sucks so bad#so yeah maybe someday#and also sorry if this is not very clear or messy#once again my english sucksđ
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i forgot i had "character analysis is my passion" in my bio because i probably put it there in late 2022..? and at that point the only serious character analysis i'd done outside media class and posted online was for sth so it was kinda just me being obnoxious but i guess it fits now since prsk character analysis is the only real thing i contribute lol. foreshadowing but not intentionally
#it's funny as well because i've always kinda liked characters just as a whole#but i never really considered screenwriting or anything. probably because i suck at writing prose although my teachers would disagree#i still got graded higher for analysis on english lit and in media class#(16/25 marks highest score in class for literally one paragraph bc i ran out of time i will never forget u. impactful moment)#(sorry i hate bringing up my grades because people hate it when i do i'm just proud of that one specifically)#i guess it kinda just made sense after how tired i got with art. taking actual art lessons kinda just busted my creativity. weird as it#sounds. maybe the 100s of OCs i made growing up should've been a sign that i needed to take screenwriting.#âdami what the FUCK are you on aboutâ i visited my old junior school yesterday and now i'm being introspective okay
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spain to win the euros but none of the black english boys to make a mistake
#inspired by @mssiâs post from tuesday lol đ#i love my spanish boys and i want them to destroy england lol#but also i actually like MOST of the players on the english team#i just canât stand english fans đ they might be the most annoying fans in the entirety of sports#and thatâs saying a lot bc you europeans probably havenât ever met a red sox fan man they are obnoxious as hell#but yeah#sorry to my english players ily but#your fans suck so you gotta go DOWN#and also you play boring mcsnoozeball#so for the sake of the sport#you also gotta go DOWN#but not the black boys bc i donât want them experiencing racial abuse#least of all by their own fans/countrymen#but we all already know thatâs exactly what would happen#so yeah spain ftw#okay thanks for coming to my ted talk#spain nt#euro 2024#*#spain vs england
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ur right he doesnât deserve it⌠he deserves better B)
heâs the reason i started drawing to begin with⌠and i wuv himâŚâŚâŚâŚ.
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#iâm sorry lol#on a serious note#i genuinely do owe any art related skill to him#i started learning jp to translate his events in ds cute also (though i still suck at jp)#i learned a lot of english from him too⌠as you can see i didnât understand the slangier expressions he used#i was completely mistaken about his character at first LOL but i ended up liking his actual character moreâŚ#if tagger ends up seeing this iâm sorry⌠thanks for praising my art :( but i think he deserves lots of good art#rock collection#my art
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Through fingertips
the vamp babyboy had me writing after 5 years i can't believe this. the reader is gender neutral and i had the idea after volunteering as a guide for visually impaired people for years (which i loved was one of the best experiences i had with volunteering) which is not the same situation, obviously, but it made me think. I also didn't play the game so i am very sorry. ps this is not betad we die like men
"Looking at something?" Astarion asks, making you jump. You were just walking toward him, your head desperately trying to come up with an excuse to talk to him.
"How did you know I was here?" You were standing just behind him, there was no way he could have seen you, busy as he was finding himself inside a shattered mirror.
Astarion smiles as he turns around to face you, his fangs gleaming in the moonlight.
Oh.
"The only benefit to a mirror when you have my condition. It doesn't quite make up for the lack of lack of a reflection, mind you." The tone of his voice doesn't have the usual hilarity you've grown used to. There's a certain sadness to it that you find hard to accept.
"Do you miss it?" you ask, your hands wringing. "Seeing your own face?"
He scoffs, as if you asked the most obvious question in the world.
"Preening in the looking glass? Petty vanity? Of course I miss it. I've never even seen this face. Not since it grew fangs and my eyes turned red."
This is the first time Astarion has spoken about his past, at least to you. You can't help but wonder how he must feel, inhabiting a body he can't even see.
"What color were they before?" you try to be as gentle as you can, praying that he won't end the conversation.
It feels like walking on eggshells, and yet you can't stop.
"I...I don't know. I can't remember." his eyebrows knit together, as if he's trying his best to go back in time. "My face is just some dark shape in my past. Another thing I've lost." he adds, throwing the mirror on the ground in anger.
You breathe sharply through your nose and walk torward him; you only stop when you're so close to him that you can see the shadows that his eyelashes cast on his cheekbones.
"What?" he asks, looking at you like you're about to jump him, and not in a way he would be delighted by.
"I see you." you say, and his eyes turn large for a moment, surprised by such simple words.
He cocks his head to the side, intrigued.
"And what do you see, exactly?"
When you were young, you had a friend.
A friend who could not see.
When the two of you were out on your little adventures, you would help her understand the shape of things by placing your hands above hers and guiding them, describing everything that the two of you would find interesting like the beetles of the ground, the skin of a serpent.
You would describe to her the shape, the texture, the color and all the details under those young fingertips.
There's a moment of hesitation before you take his hands in yours and the startled look in his face, his red eyes, makes you wonder if you should do this, if you really should get close to him.
He's a vampire, after all. A spawn, if you want to be technical about it.
But you can't lie to yourself, or hide the way in which seeing him suffer tugs at your heartstrings.
It's curse of being human.
And you want to help him, at least with this, want to alleviate centuries of suffering.
So you put your hands on top of his and guide them up to his face; the simple intimacy of the moment makes it hard for you to breathe, the silence overwhelming.
You start with the laugh lines around his mouth, one of the things you adore about his face.
"You have creases when you laugh," you say, and knowing Astarion you should have predicted his reaction.
"Excuse me?" the offended tone of his voice makes you roll your eyes to the back of your head. "I am an eternally young vampire, not your doting grandmother. You can do better."
Of course, your majesty you think to yourself.
"What else?" he asks, his breath tickles the palm of your hands.
You move his fingers torward his jawline, "The way your hair curls around your ears."
Astarion closes his eyes, as if he's imagining himself, piecing together everything you tell him.
Your marvel at the moment of vulnerability he gives you before one red eye opens and he states "This is meant to be flattery, not poetry. Just tell me I'm beautiful and we'll call it a day."
The exasperated sound of his voice and nonchalant movement of his hands makes you want to throttle him, but you know what he is doing; he's hiding in plain sight, as he always does.
But this time, you won't let him.
"Is that all you want?" you ask him. "Shallow praise?"
You can feel the way his jaw clenches under your fingertips.
"Hardly," he answers. "There's also gold, sex, revenge-quite the list, really. And failing any of those, I will settle for shallow praise."
You do not believe him, you know there must be more that he wants, but you won't push the issue, not right now at least. You want to give him the time to tell you all at his own pace.
So, you move his hands.
"You have a mole under your eye," you tell him, placing his index finger over it.
"A mole?" he asks, looking at you like you just revealed some concealed truth about the world.
"Yes."
You then take his middle finger, make it run over his nose.
"Your nose has a tiny bump in the middle of it."
Astarion hums, his eyes closed again. Your hands shake and you wonder if he notices, if he cares.
You move both his hands up, slightly gracing the lines on his forehead before going down.
"Your eyebrows form an arch of silver just above your strong, piercing eyes." you guide his fingertips, gently grazing upon his closed eyelids.
He leans in the touch and your heart soars.
"Your lips are full, but pale creating that dangerous smile of yours." You praise him, and you know that if it weren't for the close proximity you two are in, he would twirl around like a peacock, basking in the flattery.
You cradle his face, and he opens his eyes; you know this moment is about to end, and yet you feel the need to cling to it with all the strength you have.
"Thank you for showing me what the world sees when it looks at me. What you see." his voice is deep and serious and you can feel it echo in your ribcage.
You close your eyes and take a step back, your hands slowly moving away from his face.
Your face is on fire and you damn yourself over the way he makes you feel: like you're some sort of infatuated child, and not an adult who can fend for themselves.
The rawness of the way he makes you feel is unsettling.
"You're welcome." you finally answer, unable to look at him, your hand scratching the back of your neck in embarrassment.
You turn around, determined to make your way back to your tent, but his voice stops you.
"You didn't say it." he whispers as he looks at his fingernails with the same determination as a warrior gazing at the battlefield.
"What are you talking about?" you ask, confused.
"That I am beautiful. You didn't say it and you cannot leave me with this doubt, my dear."
You sigh.
Of course.
After all, this is what the wanted; to be flattered, to hear the words he wanted to hear. The fact that they came from you probably wasn't enough to make a difference.
"You are beautiful, Astarion." you say, your voice just above a whisper. All this ordeal tired you, and the only thing you want right now is to go to bed and hope the tingling in your hands stops.
"Observant." he says, the smile of his face unsettling. "Mirrors aren't much use but to be described through someone else's eyes? Well, I could do worse."
You look at him, one last time, as your hands open and close around nothing; his mask is up again, that big, mischievous smirk and dancing eyes hide him completely, like a cloak made of night.
"Goodnight, Astarion." you say, not brave enough to look at him one last time.
You walk quickly torward your tent, too quick to hear him say
"Goodnight, little love."
#why is this so long what in the actual fuck#astarion#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate astarion#baldur's gate iii#this is my first yn fic guys#i can finally put something to my dead and gone ao3#vampire#sorry to the people who played the game i feel like i am intruding#elena writes#but really this idiot cured me of my fic writing dry spell#i owe him#fic tag#writing tag#hope someone like it!#also tell me if it sucks or if you have tips!#also ps English is not my first language so i am sorry
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i don't even want to take half my classes that im registered for autumn quarter
#this is just me spitballing here -#definitely need to take the security related classes that i want to do and even if i did dogshit at databases i still want to take the next#-class in the series bc i heard its more programming#also maybe the instructor won't suck that was a huge part of it#and im dropping data science im sorry i can't do algos i can't do machine learning. fuck cs theory im not into that.#but the question now is - do systems (which would give me a leg up in the security track) or do animation capstone (which is cool)#downside of systems is that theyre some of the hardest programming classes and i have to do group projects#downside of animation is that i missed the ball on most of the stuff and its a lot of classes in a sequence. also group projects.#(or neither and fuck off and do the global health minor or take english/art/architecture/philosophy classes just for fun idfk)#the stem major's curse#the last humanities option is looking nice rn maybe i can also take a bunch of public health stuff too#i actually kind of want to enjoy college even if im a commuter with no friends#hm ok i will go look for some classes later today#the data science stuff really screwed me over im glad im free of that at least#milk (normal)#i am kind of the ''mid at everything'' guy so no specialization for me or else i get bored and start attacking myself with hammers#and i change my mind about who i am and my personality every few months so thats really fun to deal with.
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i ran out of space
#sorry my handwriting sucks balls i dont write in english very much#i dont know any other language i just write in wizard runes all the time to obscure the contents#i havent actually written more than a few sentences in not wizard runes since highschool
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Honest to god, it is terrible in England. Like I have seen so many people have a holier-than-thou attitude about "oh we're so much better than America! At least we're not racist!" And I just look at them like... I have heard some of the shit you say about Muslims... But nah. Clearly England is superior, right? This country makes me sick.
Oh I feel you there bud England is crazy too because like *gestures at colonialism*
And yeah Irish people say horrible shit about Muslims too like all you have to do is look at how people treated Sinead O'Connor when she converted to Islam
#asks#anonymous#like i remember people calling her a terrorist and saying she was apart of is*s and the like#crazy shit#ofc people gloss over that now shes passed (rip) and say wonderful things about her because typical irish people đ#but damn i feel you dude#i dont talk about it for obvs reasons but my paternal grandparents are english#and im convinced the way they treat my mother like shit is because shes irish#(well partially i suspect fatphobia as well but thats seperate to this)#and they tolerate me in their own special way cause im my dad's kid but like#fuck them#<- sorry to bring them up ive actually been in an awful mood because of shit involving them recently so#little conjecture that was relevant#ANYWAY Europe sucks all my homies hate europe đ
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every time i have a pe lesson i lose a tiny bit of my will to live
heads up i kinda started venting in the tags so if you dont want to put up with that just scroll <333
#ev yaps#vent incoming#sorry#none of the school subject slander is true btw other subjects r still very slay!!!#i fucking suck at pe#idk why but i physically cannot be good at sport#the one exeption being figure skating at which i am still kinda shit idk id never be anything close to professional#anyway to my peers its pretty much the only subject that matters#good at science? psycho (like nobody likes science but even so were all supposed to be decent at it)#maths? ok thats like the bare minimum also like nobody cares#english? ok cool#music? unless its singing or a rare-ish instrument nobody will actually give a shit#ok you get the picture#except art ig#but im not the best at it so it doesnt matter#OH NOT TO MENTION THE FUCKING 'IF YOU CANT KICK A BALL YOU'RE FAT' JOKES ISTGGGG EUGHH LIKE STOP THAT AINT COOL#im atheist but like damn god really didn't want me to amount to anything#like no joke i have literally no talent except for yapping#im just the loud kid with the weird sense of humour#that will end up working a shit boring ass job fr the rest of his life#or maybe i'll just work in an h&m until i fucking die#because being a screenwriter/ just working in film production is unrealistic#and i cant really write but its one of my best skills#i dont really know what else i can do with my life#and everyone is probably judging me#everything i say and do.#idk maybe im overthinking all of this and im fine. maybe all my problems and their impacts are being made up by some twisted corner of#my brain for attention#anyway sorry about that#back to our usual program
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Pechorin from A Hero of Our Time is truly just. One of the guys of all time
#a hero of our time#гоŃОК наŃогО вŃоПони#ramblings#this guys SUCKS#I hate Byronic heroes all my homies hate Byronic heroes#including Lermontov#he was the biggest hater#MUTUALS. YOU WILL BE FORCED TO SEE MY RUSSIAN LITERATURE POSTS.#*force wave* YOU WILL READ A HERO OF OUR TIME. YOU WILL READ A HERO FO OUR TIME. YOU WILL READ#pechorin#Russian literature crazy because I have never seen a straighter cast of characters#than the entirety of Russian literature pedagogy#Iâm sorry War and Peace may be carrying idk#but I have read many books both in Russian and in English#and like I donât think I liked one couple. not ONE#except in the film НоŃŃŃ ĐśŃŃавНи I actually. like I actually canât handle Veronika and Boris bro they deserved EACH OTHER#russian literature
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so i've been listening to a random shuffled playlist on spotify and all was fine and good except when it started playing one of my old fanfic songs and now i'm. not fine.
#hopelesshelstone#the song was 'may i' by trading yesterday you're welcome#itwas also for an old old OLD multi-chap hiccunzel story i pretty much abandoned now#this story was such a love child of mine i miss it so much#the first fanfiction i ever written i think? the first big one for sure#and there it lies forgotten#16 chapters in#i actually wrote it in polish in my first year of uni i think and then kept translating it into english#which is probably what killed most of my drive because translating SUCKS man#but i also wasn't at the level when i could just you know#write fics in english#sorry for the rant my best hiccunzel/snunzel companion is currently out of reach and i need this out of my system ok#mighty thor what a punch
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âgive me the first tasteâ | 10k
logan howlett x f!reader
part 2 of âGUILTY PLEASUREâ
"Your hungry flirt borders intrusion / And I'm building memories on things we have not said / Full is not heavy as empty, not nearly, my love / Give me the first taste / Let it begin, heaven cannot wait forever / Darling, just start start the chase, I'll let you win." The First Taste by Fiona Apple
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SUMMARY: From the moment you first laid eyes on Logan, you knew he was a tough nut to crack. But if thereâs one thing you love, itâs a challenge. As your relationship grows, youâre determined to show him that, in this universe, he can also be loved.
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni - smut 18+ fluff. angst. drinking. dirty talk. slow-burnish. age-gap (reader is 25). once again wade saves the day. domestic!logan. soft dom!logan. logan calls reader âkidâ. they watch (500) days of summer. oral sex (f and m receiving). fingering. thigh riding. thumb sucking. throat fucking. multiple orgasms. unprotected p in v. creampie (i would say iâm sorry but iâd be lying)
AUTHORâS NOTE: jeez. hi guys!!! hope youâre doing alright. this is the 2nd part to âguilty pleasure.â writing for these two has been a total rollercoaster, but god was it worth it. as i always tell you, english isnât my first language, so if you come across any mistake and you feel like letting me know, thereâs no problem. thank you so much for all the support youâve been giving my posts. iâm happy strangers out there take the time to read my silly stories :)
A girl and a mutant walk into an apartmentâŚ
Actually, youâre still trying to come up with the rest of the joke. But one thingâs true: Loganâs about to set foot in your place.
You curse under your breath, putting both your hands to work as you struggle to open the door. âFucking swollen wood. I hate humidity,â you mutter, glancing back at Logan, who frowns as you keep trying different maneuvers to get the door to function properly.
Itâs a shitty situation overall. And having that gorgeous man practically glued to your back isnât helping in any way. You can tell he wants to give you a hand, but youâre not having itâwomen in STEM or something of the sort.
âMay Iââ he starts, though you cut him off before he can finish.
âIâve got this. Just need toââ you say, ramming your shoulder into the door with enough force to make it finally give away. Almost stumbling over the carpet but managing to catch yourself, you sigh in relief. Meanwhile, Logan stands still, scrutinizing you until you gesture for him to enter. âWelcome to the smallest apartment in New York City. It's nothing fancy, but itâs got everything you need for a comfortable stay on a budget. Make yourself at home!â
Logan narrows his eyes, the tiniest smirk playing on his lips before stepping inside. Each of his movements seems to be premeditated as he tosses his jacket onto the couch, surveying the room. A portrait of when you were a kid, probably six or seven years old, catches his attention. He tilts his head, picking up the picture to examine it more closely, and then flashes you a lopsided grin. âHow cute.â
âWell, Iâve changed a lot,â you take the picture from his hands, returning it to the shelf where he had gotten it from.Â
âWell,â he echoes, mocking your tone, âyour beauty certainly hasnât.â
His eyes bore into you as you meet his gaze. What amazes you most is that heâs being completely honest. In a heartbeat, you look away, wondering whatâs gotten into you. Usually, youâre not this awkwardâyouâve learned how to take compliments over the years, knowing how to smile just right, to flutter your eyelashes. To blush and giggle in command. Those were the tools that helped you to survive countless first datesâyour dearest aces up your sleeve.
Thereâs no use denying that they remained just that: first, failed dates. You hope you never have to go back to dating apps after this.
âAre you hungry? âCause Iâm starving,â you say, trying to walk away from him, although heâs faster, catching your hand in his.Â
âHey,â he urges you to make eye contact with him, his voice perplexingly soft. âIs everything okay?â
You nod so vigorously that you nearly strain your neck. âIâm fine, I swear. I just never get past this point.â
Inching closer, he presses his lips together for a split second, his brows furrowing in confusion. âYou lost me there.â
âGuys who come into my apartment donât tend to call back,â you admit, a flush creeping up your face, cheeks getting hotter. âI happen to believe itâs a curse, though Iâve kissed, like, a hundred toads so far and it still wonât break.â
âSo yâthink youâre gonna scare me off,â he raises an eyebrow, grinning. His rough fingers become gentle as they tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. âItâs sweet. Should be the other way around.â
Wow. You two are a match made in heaven.
As you detach yourself from his embrace and head to the kitchen, you decide to look for something edible in the fridge, finding different trays of food from days ago, none of which look appetizing or suitable for feeding the Tin Woodman standing behind you.
All of a sudden, the unmistakable metallic sound of Loganâs claws unsheathing rings in your ears, forcing you to spin around. The image that unfolds before you is peculiar, to say the least: heâs cornering your cat against the door.
Why is he about to fight a cat?
âPlease donât kill him?â you take a step in his direction and scoop the little ball of white fur into your arms. Logan stares at both of you, eyes squinted and brows knitted. âIâm sure heâs the cutest feline youâve ever seen. Have mercy on him.â
âI didnât know you had a cat.â
âEarnest wasnât aware of your existence either,â you reply, scratching along the animalâs back. He purrs beside your neck, his yellowish eyes never leaving Loganâs. âEarnest, this is Logan. He has claws just like you.â
âDonât you dare compare me to that,â Logan warns you, retracting his claws with a sigh. You canât help but wonder if he ever feels tranquil, at peace. âYâknow, youâve doomed him to bad fortune with that name. Is he at least toilet trained?â
âAre you hating on The Importance of Being Earnest?â you ask, expecting a retort, though apparently the playâs title doesnât ring a bell for him. âOscar Wilde?â
âWho do you think youâre talkinâ to, kid?â
Nowâs your time to roll your eyes, setting the cat down and letting it run away. He likes to hide in the bathroomâdonât ask why, because not even you know the answer to that. You flick your gaze up back to Logan, placing your hands on your hips. âSee, you gave him trust issues.â
âHeâll survive. Donât they have seven lives?â
This is the perfect conversation to have with someone who just ate you out thirty minutes ago: how many lives do cats have. Jesus.
At some point, Logan flops onto the couch, stretching out. You shudder as you hear him crack his neck, the popping sound getting on your nerves. He pats the empty side of the sofa, spreading his thighs until heâs almost taking up all the space. âCome here.â
Putting aside all your thoughts, you accept the invitation. You sit down, motionless, and his arm grazes the cushion behind your head, pulling you closer to him. You rest your cheek on his chest, letting out a deep sigh, one that youâve been holding in since you got to the apartment. Is it possible that he knows you craved this? This proximity, this kind of affection. To be heldâitâs been your only wish for months. He drums his fingers on your shoulder blades, then starts rubbing your back ever so lightly.
Far from dozing off, you feel alive.
Itâs hard not to lose track of time and space when you find yourself immersed in the warmth he offers, and thatâs when you realize how deeply youâre falling for this man. âLogan?â the mere thought of asking him whatâs been on your mind terrifies you. The last thing you want is to ruin thingsâor whatever it is that you have. He hums, a low, heavy sound in his throat, indicating you to continue. âI have a question.â
âAsk away.â
You lift your face from his chest and look him in the eye. The cityâs still alive outside, with music and chatter sneaking in through the window. Everything seems to be perfect, and you wish you could stay like thisâjust staring at him as if he were a painting in a museum, and you the critic who canât stop writing articles about its beauty.
Okay, that was⌠weirdly specific.Â
Logan tries to hide his smile as you peck his lips repeatedly. For a moment, you almost forget what you were going to ask him in the first place. But then heâs ready to listen, and you a wave of nausea washes over you.
âI know that we came here to⌠engage in adult practices.â
âFucking, you mean.â
âI didnât want to be that straightforward, but yeah,â you say, shaking your head as to rearrange your thoughts. âWould you mind if we stayed like this?â to emphasize your point, you kick your shoes off and put your legs on top of his lap. He observes the whole sequence without daring to utter a word. âDonât get me wrong. Iâd love to try that too. I truly do. But⌠right now, all I want is to cuddle,â heâs still silent, making you even more nervous. âIâm sorry. Is that okay with you?â
His whole body engulfs yours, your cheek coming to rest once again in its original position. You can feel the rhythmic beating of his heart, each breath he takes, the air he exhales dampening your nape. Logan peppers your neck with chaste kisses before pressing his lips to your temple. His voice comes out strained, partially muffled by your hair. âWho do you take me for, huh?â heâs right there, beside your ear, fucking everywhere. There isnât a single centimeter of your exposed skin that he isnât touching, marking as his. You donât give him an answer, in part because youâre unsure of what to say. He takes your silence as a cue to keep talking. âLet me take you to bed.â
âI can walk on my own.â
âI know,â he mutters, standing up with you in his arms, one arm beneath your knees and the other one under your shoulders. Loganâs not used to being this cautious, this patient with someone heâs known for less than two weeks. You see it in his eyes when he lets his guard downâsomething that has cracked, a shell thatâs been broken.
As he places you gently on top of the covers, he lingers for a moment, crouching beside the bed and searching for your lowered gaze. His fingers are warm as he tilts your chin up. âI didnât come here just to have sex with you. That was a possibility, of courseâbut itâs not the main reason why Iâm here,â he rasps, words accompanied by the light brush of his lips against yours for a quick, brief kiss. âI care about you. A lot. Iâm fine with whatever we do as long as I get to be close to you,â he grabs your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He then goes back to his usual bossy self, his demeanor changing. âAnd I donât want to hear you apologizing for not wanting to have sex ever again. Understood?â
âYes, sir.â
âNow youâre making jokes?â
âI canât have serious conversations,â you confess, observing the look of pure confusion on his face. âItâs true. I once spoke at a funeral and they cut me off forty seconds into my speech.â
Logan laughs at your sudden confession, his eyes crinkling at the edges. Rising to his feet, he begins to unbutton his flannel, pausing after the first few buttons are undone, waiting for your approval. âDo you want me to stay tonight?âÂ
âIf thatâs what you want.â
âIt is what I want.â
âAre you sure?â
âDonât make me change my mind.â
His words donât hide any real threatâthat you know.
You stifle your laughter, shedding your clothes. Instead of going to the bathroom to change, you toss your work clothes carelessly to the floor, opting for an old pair of pajamas that are the complete opposite of sexy. They surely have seen better days.
Loganâs eyes trail over you, taking his time to analyze the faded lettering on your wrinkled shirt. âKeep calm and eat pizza?â he reads aloud.
âHey. I bought it when I was seventeen.â
âYou could use a new wardrobe.â
âWell, what about you?â you tease, toying with his belt. âYouâre gonna sleep like this in my bed?â
âCanât wait for me to get my shirt off, huh?â he grins, that all-too-familiar smile on his lips.
You play along, folding your arms over your chest. âYou think so highly of yourself.â
Without breaking eye contact, Logan unbuckles his jeans, letting them pool around his ankles. He then shrugs off his flannel, leaving him in just his briefs and vest. You scan his body, and the room suddenly feels a hundred degrees hotter, the air between you thickening. Logan notices your reaction, chuckling. âDonât get too excited. This is all youâre getting today.â
âI think Iâve already heard that before.â
âKid.â
You raise your hands in surrender, showing him your palms and mouthing âsorryâ. Approaching your bed, you pull back the covers and slip into it. When you see Logan still standing there, you frown. âWhere are your manners? Come here. Iâm very impatient.â
He grumbles something under his breath, but he doesnât make you wait long. He proceeds to get under the sheets beside you, occupying that side of the bed thatâs always been empty. As you both settle in, facing each other, you canât help but giggle, your contagious laugh getting to him. âWhat now?â
âYouâre beautiful,â you whisper, tracing the bridge of his nose with your index finger, a featherlight touch that has him closing his eyes. In the soft glow of the night, with the cityâs distant sounds filtering in, he looks breathtaking. âI mean it.â
âDo you have an off switch?â
âIâm⌠not sure. Letâs find out tomorrow.â
âYou need to sleep,â he pulls you onto his chest with firm but gentle hands. He intertwines his legs with yours, holding you close.
âWait. I have a game to play.â
âItâs late.â
âPlease?â
He sighs. âOkay.â
âWe have to make confessions until we fall asleep.âÂ
âYou just want to talkâthat doesnât even qualify as a game.â
âIt does in this universe,â you reply, feeling his chest rumble with a chuckle as you settle more comfortably against him. âIâll start: remember the first night you came to the bar?â he hums in acknowledgment. âIt wasnât Burger Night. We donât serve food. I just wanted an excuse to talk to you.â
He kisses the top of your head, his arms tightening around you. âI knew. You donât have a kitchen down there, baby,â he falls silent, taking his time to come up with a confession of his own. âI have a fear of flying.â
âReally? You, of all people?â
âI wasnât expecting to be judged.â
âOh, donât be such a crybaby,â you tease, burying your face further into the crook of his shoulder, inhaling his scent. He shivers slightly where your nose touches his skin. âI like you. Itâs kind of scary, and Iâm sure saying something like this probably goes against the rules of dating 101, but I do. I feel safe with you, likeâlike this is where Iâm supposed to be.â
Almost as if the pieces of the puzzle finally fit together, you think to yourself, though the words stay unspoken.
Youâve come to learn that Loganâs not a man of many wordsâheâs more of the âshow, donât tellâ kind of guy. So when he makes you lift your face, youâre not surprised by the way he kisses you: hungrily. Passionately, like a starved man at an all-you-can-eat buffet. A soft whimper gets lost somewhere in your throat as his tongue makes its way into your mouth, languidly stroking yours.
âWe didnât brush our teeth,â you whisper against his lips, laughing when he groans in exasperation.
âYou love having the final say, donât you?â
âIâm being serious, Logan. Cavities are a real issue for me.â
âYou can always get new teeth.â
âBut my morning breathââ
âItâll stink anyway, and so will mine,â he responds, taking a deep breath and clearing his throat once he settles into his ideal sleep position. âGood night.â
âNight,â you murmur, nuzzling your cheek against his neck. Despite your efforts to ignore it, being cradled like this feels incredible. You canât believe you went twenty-five years without it.
Just as youâre about to drift off, curiosity strikes. âCan you get tattoos?â
âBub, I was actually falling asleep.â
âOh, okay. Sorry,â you mumble, feeling a bit sheepish.
More silence.
âLogan?â
âHmm?â
âWhat was the Great Depression like?â
âFuck me,â he mutters, his voice gruff as he shifts lightly. âIt was fine. Now go to sleep.â
And you do, but not for long. An abrupt coldness wakes you up, eyes wide open, feeling disoriented. Itâs still pitch black outside, far quieter than when you first fell asleep. The clock on your nightstand reads itâs 3:17 am, though it feels like youâve only been in bed for five minutes.
Then you see himâheâs twitching in his sleep on the far side of the bed, his painful grunts reaching your ears. Most of what he says is unintelligible, but thereâs one word he keeps repeating over and over again without fail: âNo.â
You donât usually have nightmares. Whatâs the best way to wake someone from one? Youâre still thinking when he starts mumbling again, his voice thick with distress, and now heâs throwing his arms in the air as if he were fighting off somethingâor someoneâin his dreams.
Pressing your hands to his cheeks, you attempt to hold his face steady. He clenches his fists, his breath quickening the more he battles whateverâs haunting him. âLogan,â you whisper at first, subtly shaking his shoulders, but his eyebrows stay furrowed, deep in his nightmare. This time, you tighten your grip, fully sitting on top of him. âLogan. Logan! Wake up!â
Without warning, youâre on your back, pinned against the mattress. Loganâs straddling your hips, caging you in with his body, the weight of his adamantium skeleton pressing down. Your hands are trapped beneath his, and you watch as he clenches his jaw, teeth bared in a way that looks painful. His eyes are so dark and wild you barely recognize him, prominent veins throbbing in his neck with each labored breath he takes.
âLogan,â your own voice sounds unnatural, forced, as you do your best to bring him back to reality. âItâs me. Youâre alright.â
That seems to get through him. Logan stares at you in disbelief, his eyes softening as they take in your terrified expression. He abruptly pulls away, retreating to the nearest wall. Heâs gasping for air, slamming his eyes shut, his legs trembling. The only sound you can hear is his rapid breathing. You get up from the bed, taking a step in his direction, but you donât manage to go any further since he stops you with a shout.
âStay right there!â heâs growling, pointing his finger at you. âIâm serious. Donât come any closer.â
âLoganâŚâ
âPlease, no!â his voice increases in pitch, not being able to meet your eyes. âPlease. Just stay there.â
You comply, not wanting to upset him any further. Sitting back on your knees, you try to appear calm. A man so strong, capable of things you canât even understand. A weapon turned against himself now stands before you, pushing you away as if his presence were poisonous. He slumps to the floor, the fabric of his vest soaked with sweat.
Once heâs fully conscious, you cautiously crawl toward him, watching his every move. On a random day, this might have been funny for both of you, but right now, thereâs no room for laughter. Logan shakes his head, his shoulders tensing when you reach out to hug him, wrapping your arms around his broad frame. It takes him a couple of minutes, but eventually, his body sags against yours. For a while, neither of you speaks. You just thread your fingers through his hair, hoping the closeness will help soothe him. âFeeling better?â you whisper in the shell of his ear, and he pulls back to look you in the eye. You caress his cheek, his stubble rough against your skin. âWelcome back.â
âIâm sorry,â itâs the first thing he says, covering your hand with his. One by one, he kisses your knuckles, still shaking his head. âI donât know what came over me.â
âYou had a nightmareâitâs not like you could control it.â
âBut I couldâve hurt you,â he says, lowering his gaze to your wrists, where his fingerprints have left their mark. âGod. Iâm so sorry. I have to go.â
âWait!â you grab his arm, your mouth setting in a hard line, stopping him from leaving. âDonât run away from me, not now. Donât push me away, Logan.â
âI couldâve done something much worse.â
âBut you didnât. It was a nightmare, baby. You didnât know,â you kiss his forehead, hoping to talk some sense into him. âPlease, stay. Letâs try to get some more sleep.â
âWhat ifââ
You hold his face close to yours, your noses brushing. âYou wonât hurt me.âÂ
This time, he lets you keep him close, the roles now reversed. You can see him fighting his exhaustion, not wanting to fall asleep. But the more you play with his hair, the harder it is for him to stay awake.
âIâm alright,â he says, seemingly reading your mind. Itâs hard to tell whether heâs reassuring you or himself.
âI know,â you knead his shoulder, aiming to ease the tension knotted there. âYou better sleep, or I might start rambling again.â
A faint, tired hum escapes him, at long last allowing his eyes to close. âI like hearing you talk,â he murmurs, his breath warm against your collarbone, drifting off soon after that.
You continue to hug him, feeling the weight of his body gradually relax against yours as his breathing evens out. The room is quiet, but your mind is far from it: a tornado of emotions swirls within youâconcern, relief, love, and something else you canât quite decipher. It isnât until sleep finally claims you too that your brain stops going a hundred kilometers an hour.
The most surreal Sunday night of your whole life.
âSo⌠when will you let me see Lolo again?â
Wadeâs question makes you stop mid-pour, flicking your eyes between the drink and him. A few seats away, you hand a glass to Adam. Returning to where Wadeâs currently sitting, you dry your hands on your apron. âWhy are you even here?â you ask, raising an eyebrow, and he gives half a shrug. âLast time I checked, I wasnât holding him against his will.â
âHeâs been crashing at your place almost every night. You have your own methods, woman,â he raises one finger, then quickly adds another, pointing at your shirt. âTwo methods, in fact.â
At that, you laugh mirthlessly, shaking your head with a grin. âIâm surprised anyone would willingly date you.â
âI could ask you the same thing,â he retorts, taking a tentative sip of his beer and leaning back in his chair.
You glance at him while you wipe down the bar, looking for something to occupy your hands. âHeâs not my boyfriendâyet.â
Wade mimics a punch in his chest, just where his heartâs supposed to be, though youâre starting to question whether he has one. His lips form a small, exaggerated pout. âThat must hurt, doll. You got yourself into a situationship with a goddamn fossil. Good luck getting out of that.â
âItâs not that bad,â you say, rolling your eyes. âWeâre cool this way. Thereâs absolutely no need for a title.â
âOkay, letâs rehearse that one more time because you look like youâre about to cry,â he lifts an eyebrow, drawing nearer. âYou want the title, right?â
âI donât.â
He props his chin on his hand, laughing at you. âYes, you do. You canât fool me.â
âI said I donât.â
âI said I donât,â he mocks you, kicking his legs and puckering his lips.
You canât help but throw the towel down on the counter with irritation, giving in. âOkay! Of course, I want the fucking title.â
âThere she is!â he exclaims, throwing his hands up in a triumphant gesture. âGlad weâre speaking the truth now,â he tilts his head to the side, noticing your sudden silence. âHey, drop the long face. Iâm sure heâs been thinking about it. In order to understand Logan, I usually compare him to elders over ninety.â
âWhy would you do that?â you ask, your tone a mix of mild annoyance and curiosity.
âJust think about it! Senior citizens didnât date for too long in the past. Theyâd go straight from strangers to lovers. Take my grandparents, for example: in the span of one year, they met at a party, then got married, and had five kids. Do you really want to have a litter of Loganâs grumpy, hairy puppies?â
âWade, thatâs not even possible.â
âThe point is,â he continues, finishing his beer and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, âLoganâs rusty in this area, alright? Iâd bet a thousand dollars he probably dated Cleopatra.â
âHow did you pass History in high school?â
âI never graduated, but keep that between us,â he lifts his shoulders, shrugging. He spins the empty bottle, contemplating his next words. âYou should tell him how you feel and what you want. Thatâs what works best for Vanessa and me. Itâs easier that wayâyou canât expect him to just guess.â
You wrap your arms around yourself. âI just wish heâd realize it on his own.â
âWell, sometimes you need to give the other person a bit of guidance. Iâm just laying out the basics of a relationship here. Did your parents hate each other or something?â
The irony of it all. âThey got divorced when I was little.âÂ
âOh, god,â Wade sighs, rubbing his temples before glancing at you. âLet me get this straight: Mommy and Daddy werenât exactly the poster children for love. And you also happen to be a bartender. Anything else, honey? Please tell me youâre at least getting laid, because otherwise, Iâm going to feel tremendously sorry for you and your mental health.â
Just then, you hear your name being called. Smiling at Wade, you mumble: âSaved by the bell.â Once youâre back from taking some orders, Wade jumps to his feet, coming around the counter to hug you.
âDude, whatâs the matter with you?â you ask, loosely returning the hug.Â
âYouâre a fucking survivor,â he whispers in your ear, genuinely sounding concerned. âI donât know how you do itâyou seem so put together. I wouldâve lost it by now. A life without sex sounds awful.â
âJesus, Wade! Get off!â you stretch your arm to punch him in the back, earning a groan from him. âBack to your seat, gentleman. I certainly donât need your pity.â
âIâm a certified sexologist. Your secretâs safe with me,â he declares with a smirk, gesturing to his empty beer. âBut first, Iâm gonna need more of this tasty apple juice.â
âI hope youâve got some cash on you,â you say, getting him another beer. âWhy do I get the feeling Logan would kill us if he knew weâre talking about this?â
âIsnât that what makes it even better?â
Swaying on your feet, you scrunch your nose, momentarily lost in thought. âHe wonât let me touch him. I donât know if itâs me that does something wrong. We do have our⌠moments, but he takes care of himself. And usually in the bathroom.â
Wade goes white in front of you. âHow long has this been going on?â
âOver a month.â
âOh. Thatâs bad, like, really bad.â
âThanks! Iâll be sleeping on the highway tonight. You can always join me.â
âDoll, itâs nothing that canât be fixed, alright?â he waves his hand dismissively, then sets his palms flat on the counter. âI know Iâm starting to sound like a broken record, but talking to him is your best bet. This isnât something you can just brush under the carpet. Youâre like a goddamn radioâput it to good use.â
Just as youâre about to reply, you spot Logan entering the bar. You raise a hand in greeting, waving at him. He meets your gaze and smiles briefly, and so your eyes drift to Wadeâs, shooting him a warning look. âIf you keep this to yourself, I wonât charge you for today,â you mutter through gritted teeth, to which he answers by pretending to zip his mouth closed.
Logan takes a seat next to him, ignoring his presence. Instead, he focuses entirely on you. âHey, kid.â
âHey, homey.â
âHiya, Wade,â Wade greets himself with a mock cheer, patting his own back, which makes you laugh. He turns to Logan and his whole face lights up. âIâm afraid to tell you I canât sleep when youâre not around.â
Logan rolls his eyes. âGet your shit together.â
âYouâre the worst roommate ever! Canât believe you got yourself a girl and completely forgot about your bro,â Wade murmurs under his breath, just as his phone rings. âThank God. Iâve got to go. My love nuggetâs calling,â he announces, heading for the door. Before leaving, Wade blows the two of you a kiss. âI hate you both, but I also love you. Peace out, my friends!â
Logan and you exchange glances. âHeâs a funny guy, isnât he?â
âYou could say that,â he replies, leaning in to kiss you on the lips. Logan intends to deepen the kiss, but you pull away after a couple of seconds. He frowns, clearly confused. âThatâs how you greet me?â
You bite your lip, trying to suppress a giggle. âMy tip jar is practically empty, and I hate to say it, but itâs your fault.â
âDo you want me to say Iâm sorry?â
âOh, no.â
âGood, âcause Iâm not,â he plants a quick kiss on your cheek, making you smile. âYou have classes tomorrow, right?â
âYeah, at 9 am,â you almost grunt, not feeling too enthusiastic about it. âIâm gonna need your help. I canât sleep through my alarm, okay? The professor said tomorrowâs class is an important one. Midterms are right around the corner, and I canât take the liberty of failing them.â
âThat wonât happen,â he assures you, and you believe him. âI can be of help, donât worry. You wonât oversleep.â
Oh, Logan. Sweet, lying Logan.
Turns out you ended up oversleeping. Twenty-five years on this earth, and you still havenât learned not to trust a man, even if his puppy-dog eyes silently beg you to do otherwise. The thing isâyou love them. You love men. And youâre especially fond of the one currently sleeping in your bed.
The first rays of sunshine hit your face, waking you up. You attempt to raise a hand to shield your eyes, but moving any limbs feels like a Herculean task. A warm body is pressed against your back, one veiny arm draped over your stomach. Logan remains fast asleep behind you, his steady breathing succeeding in making you feel at ease. You reach back, running your fingers through his messy hair, and he grumbles in his sleep, instinctively pulling you closer.
What a nice, domestic morning. Yep, youâre getting used to this. And nope, you donât regret it, not even in the slightest bit.
Though there must be a mistake, because youâre preeeeetty sure you had something important to do.Â
Oh. You have classes. Hadâpast tense.
You reach for your nightstand, blindly groping for your phone. The charger is lying on the floor, the plastic of it all damaged. Perhaps Earnest had chewed on it while you were sleeping? You gently pry Loganâs arm off you, sitting up, and your bleary eyes land on something barely peeking out from under the bed.
Itâs your fucking phone. The screen is completely shattered, with three distinct holes in the middle of it. Three holes, how strange! You canât help but wonder who might have left them. Clutching your pillow, you whack Logan in the face with it. âRise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!â
He groans, trying to take the pillow away from you. âWhat the fuck is wrong with you, kid?â
âI wish I had a UNO reverse card because I should be the one asking you that!â you jab your finger into his chest, showing him the ruined phone. âYou broke my fucking phone!â
âWhat?â he asks, voice laden with sleep, still disoriented. He holds the phone, carefully scrutinizing it. âI think I donât know how to hit the snooze button.â
âNo shit, Sherlock. I believe youâve made that very clear,â you huff, tossing the phone aside as you flop back onto the mattress. The clock on your nightstand says 11:05 am, and you cover your face with your hands, taking a deep breath. âNext time, when it goes off, just wake me up and Iâll do it.â
Logan settles beside you, resting his head on his forearm as he watches you. âIâm sorry, bub. Iâll get you a new one.â
âItâs fine,â you murmur, sighing. This is your free ticket to be a menace. âI shouldâve known dinosaurs and phones would never get along. My bad, pal.â
You donât even get to see his reaction because he starts tickling you, the room filling with your laughter. Squealing, you try to wriggle away, but his fingers dig into your ribs, expertly finding your most ticklish spots. Your giggles escalate into breathless laughter, your eyes squeezed shut as you desperately attempt to push him away. Heâs relentless, chuckling when his own laughter bubbles up.Â
âL-logan, stop!â you gasp between fits of laughter, aiming to grasp his hands.
âWe dinosaurs love tickling people. Sorry, sweetheart,â he manhandles you until youâre perched on his lap, fisting the fabric of your (his) shirt. Leaning forward, he captures your mouth in a heated kiss. âIâm sorry about the phone,â he slurs the words against your cheek, his lips trailing down to your neck. You tell him that itâs okay, trying to find a comfortable position on top of him, and thatâs when his thigh presses against your core, your eyes widening at the unexpected sensation. Loganâs no fool, noticing the way your breath hitches. âWhatâs wrong, baby? You woke up needy?â
âNo, I justââ you trail off as he does it again, his strong thigh coming in contact with your clothed cunt. You search for leverage by placing your hands on his shoulders, glancing at him. âLogan.â
âIâm all ears,â he rests his back against the headboard, the tent in his boxers impossible to ignore. âYou want to get off on my thigh,â he states with certainty. Itâs not a questionâitâs a full-on statement. He knows what you want, what you crave. âCome on then. Grind against it.â
You do as he says, not caring to think twice. You start moving, rubbing your wet pussy against his muscular thigh. The friction sends jolts of pleasure through you, and soon, youâre whimpering his name, your hands trailing down his abs. Why hadnât you tried this before? It feels fucking amazing.
From his position, Logan stares at you, his lips slightly parted, eyes clouded with lust. Your arousal drenches your panties, soaking through them, the fabric clinging to his coarse leg hair. He glances down at the mess youâre making, his grin widening as he takes in the sight. âGoddamn, woman. Iâm gonna make you clean it off, I swear to God.â
âNeed your help,â you whisper, lowering your head, the heat in your cheeks intensifying. The coil tightening inside you is almost unbearable. A kiss is what you lean in for, desperate for more, though Logan appears to have other plans. He fists your hair, pulling at your nape and yanking your head back. The roughness of the movement pulls a moan from your lips, your mouth parched like a desert.Â
âEyes up here, okay? You look at me when I make you come,â his raspy voice makes you feel tingly, each word sending shivers down your spine. His hands fiercely grab the flesh of your hips, guiding you, helping you grind harder against his thigh. You think youâre on the verge of drooling when you catch the way his abdomen flexes, working to push you toward that long-awaited release. âThatâs it, there you go,â he rasps, relishing the sounds heâs eliciting from you, each of your gasps feeding his desire.
Time slows as the warmth in your belly finally erupts, your eyes fighting to stay open through the aftershocks of your orgasm. No actual words leave your mouth, just a string of whines and moans, some carrying Loganâs name. He swallows every single sound you make, everything you give him, grunting as your legs tremble and shake atop him.
He lets you collapse onto your back, your breathing gradually evening out. âI think I saw fireworks behind my lids,â you confess, your mouth dry, expecting Logan to flop onto the mattress beside you. But he doesnât. Through your blurry vision, you contemplate as he positions himself between your parted legs, getting dangerously close to your cunt. âLogan, what are youâ Oh, fuck,â you moan mid-sentence when you feel him pulling your panties aside to lick a slow strip through your folds, collecting your arousal. He points his tongue, dipping it into your entrance, and you wince, squirming. âSanta Claus, is that you?â
Logan grins against you, closing his mouth around clit for a moment. He then shifts until heâs eye-to-eye with you, two of his fingers sliding into you in one smooth motion. âGive me another one,â he murmurs, his other hand slipping under your shirt to play with your nipples, pinching them.Â
You never imagined two fingers could bring such intense pleasure. You just lie there, taking it like a good girl, as Logan sometimes call you. âPlease, I need you,â you cry out, your fingernails scraping against his torso.
âI know, darlinâ. Iâm right here,â he rasps against your temple, moving his fingers in and out of you with more enthusiasm. But what he doesnât understand is that you need all of him. Your hands itch to touch him, to feel the weight of his cock. The corners of his mouth turn up as he watches you struggle to find words. âWish you could see yourself like this. Such a pretty girl, so gorgeous like this,â his fingers keep grazing that bundle of joy deep inside you, and he goes in for a kiss, the sour taste of your slick invading your taste buds. âTightest pussy Iâve ever had. Need to stretch you real good before fucking you with my cock.â
Bingo! That last sentence does it for you, and you come for the second time in the morning, your cunt clenching and spasming around his fingers. You hide your face in his neck, mouthing at his Adamâs apple. He hasnât trimmed his beard in days, and it shows because you can now feel a burning sensation on the soft skin of your inner thighs.
âYouâre allowed to break all my phones from now on,â you suggest, only to hear Loganâs laughter in your ear. He snakes a hand through your hair, shoving it back away from your face. You feel him kiss your sweaty forehead, and as you press yourself closer to his body, something hard nudges your hipbone.
Absentmindedly, you trace the waistband of his boxers with your index finger, your eyes snapping to his face. Logan freezes on the spot, and itâs almost as if heâs stopped breathing. Without a word, he rises from the bed, his movements sudden and almost mechanical. You watch him, puzzled, as he heads toward the bathroom, the intimacy of just moments ago being abruptly replaced by a dreadful silence.
âLogan, is everything okay? Do you need something?â you ask and he pauses at the bathroom door, his back to you. For a brief second, you think he might actually open up, but when he turns around, his expression is neutral, masking whatever thoughts are running through his mind. At last, he flashes you a quick smile.
âIâm fine,â he says, his tone gentle but distant. âJust gonna take a shower. Then we can have breakfast together, right?â
You nod, his words easing the growing sense of frustration gnawing at you. He disappears into the bathroom, and the sound of running water soon follows. You sink back into the bed, staring up at the ceiling. You take your pillow and bury your face in it, letting out a muffled groan. Thereâs something he isn't telling you, something hidden deep beneath his usual gruff exterior. Although you try to piece together the fragments of his behavior, they donât quite fit.
The minutes drag on, and the sound of the shower becomes a distant, constant background noise. You close your eyes, visualizing your happy place, but your thoughts keep spiraling. All you can do is waitâwait for him to come back and act as if nothing had happened.
Loganâs right there, just a few feet awayâyet in moments like these, he feels miles apart. Itâs one of those days in which, no matter how hard you try, you canât seem to bridge that distance.Â
It had all started with you asking Logan âHave you ever watched (500) Days of Summer?â
Of course, he had refused to watch the movie at first, and of course, you had threatened him with phoning Wade to let him know that Logan wanted to have a sleepover. That had done the trick.
You had asked for a day off at the bar, and surprisingly, your boss hadnât objected. That turn of events led to this moment: sprawled out on the couch with Logan, the two of you watching the final minutes of your favorite film. Logan takes a long drag of his cigar, eyes trained intently on the screen. Heâs only wearing sweatpants, which had caused your attention to drift from the plot a few times. The fact that you managed to sit through the entire movie without needing to pause it makes you feel particularly invincible.
Hey.
You again.
Yeah. I, uh, was just wondering if maybe after this, if, um, youâ you want to get some coffee or something.
Oh, Iâm sorry. Iâm sort of supposed to meet someone after this.
Okay.
âThat poor fella,â Logan murmurs, taking a slow sip of his beer. You look up at him from where your head rests on his lap, a contented smile playing on your lips. His fingers absently stroke your hair.
âJust wait,â you say, pointing to the screen of your laptop.
Sure.
Whatâs that?
Why not?
Okay. Well, then Iâll just, uhâ Iâll wait for you.
Weâ weâll figure it out.
Weâll figure it out.
âTheyâll figure it out!â you exclaim, but Logan quickly shushes you, his attention unwavering.
My nameâs Tom.
Nice to meet you. Iâm Autumn.
When the movie comes to an end, youâre met with Joseph Gordon-Levitt breaking the fourth wall, staring straight at the audience as if he knows heâs about to get himself into a mess with another girl named after a season. You sit up, your eyes eagerly searching for Loganâs. âSo? Did you like it? Iâve watched it seven times now. Canât understand how it gets better each time.â
Logan closes his mouth around his cigar, inhaling deeply before answering. âYeah, it was pretty good,â he says, his hand finding your cheek, thumb brushing softly against your skin. âSummerâs a bitch, though.â
âI respectfully disagree,â you tell him, grabbing his beer and giving it a try, only to grimace at the taste. Shuddering, you set it back down. âWhy donât you like her character?â
âWell, for starters, she did Tom dirty. Played with him like he was a damn rag doll.â
You raise an eyebrow, hugging a cushion closer to your chest as you lean back into the couch. âHe knew from the beginning she didnât want to be his girlfriend. Summer was clearâTom just though he was smart enough to change her mind.â
âThey acted like boyfriend and girlfriend the whole movie,â he scorns, placing his cigar down into the ashtray with a bit more force than necessary.
Is your first argument going to be over a movie? Exciting.
âLogan, they werenât even official.â
âBut she made it seem like they were,â he insists, the frustration in his voice growing.
âThey were in a situationshipâthe perfect example, really. Thatâs not the same as being a couple.â
His gaze dips to the floor, brows knitted in a deep frown. âI think youâre relying on the technicality that they never used those titles. I mean, they did everything together. Isnât that what normal couples do?â
Lord have mercy.
âLogan, who am I to you?â you inquire, crossing your arms over your chest.
He hesitates, narrowing his eyes, the question clearly catching him off guard. âYou areâwhat? I donât understand. Is this some kind of mind game youâre playing?â
âItâs actually very simple: if someone were to ask you about me, what would you say? Am I a friend? A bartender?â you inch forward, holding your breath, your tone faltering slightly. Meanwhile, Loganâs hands tighten into fists at his sides. âA fling? Your girlfriend? You complain so much about Summer, yet you canât even name what we have.â
The living room falls into a heavy silence. Logan blinks slowly, his forehead creasing as he processes your words. âWhy are you doing this to me?â
âBecause these are the kinds of conversations we need to have. I understand you donât want to have them, but I do.â
âFine. Then tell me what it is that you want,â he asks, his mouth snapping shut when he sees you snorting in response.
âI donâtâ I donât know! To know how you feel, if possible?â you stand up from the couch, taking the cushion with you. You grind your jaw, gnawing on your bottom lip. âWhy is it that every time I try to touch you, you push me away?â
He scrunches up his face, mirroring your movements and rising from his seat. âBub, can we please talk about this tomorrowââ
âNo! You donât get to make all the choices, thatâs not fair. Deciphering you isnât easy, Logan. Iâm not asking you to tell me everything youâve been through. I just wish I could know how you feel about me. I canât stand in front of you and pretend I donât mind where this is going, because Iâm more than sure Iâm falling in love with you. â
âYou canât. You shouldnât,â he says, his expression hardening. He turns his back to you, running his hands over his face in frustration before heading to the kitchen.
âWell, what were you expecting?â you follow him into the kitchen, finding Earnest on top of the fridge, beholding the scene with a curious gaze. âYou basically moved in here, gave me a free trial of what life with you might be like, and now you have the audacity to appear surprised when I tell you Iâve caught feelings?â salty tears start rolling down your cheeks, and you spread your arms wide in exasperation. âOh, but youâre right. How could Iâve been this stupid, to fall for the damned Wolverine!â you laugh bitterly, expecting him to break eye contact, but he doesnât. âYou think youâre so bad, so broken. Guess what: youâre not, because I love you, and I couldnât care less about your past. You may think youâre unlovable, but youâre not, you hear me?â
For a heartbeat, the world seems to pause. And so he says:
âYou are the most exasperating person I know.â
âWow. Thank you so much!â you retort, your voice dripping with sarcasm. You run a hand through your hair, infuriated. âThat makes me feel better!â
âLet me do the talking now,â he says, taking long strides toward you, and the proximity makes you lower your head. âYouâre not getting the final say today. Just because Iâm not over-sharing my feelings all the time doesnât mean I donât have them! In fact, I do. I may not express them openly, but they exist. And I wish you could see inside my head! Youâd be delighted at how much time I spend thinking about you,â you cackle at his words, rolling your eyes. His fingers grip your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. âThere hasnât been a single moment since the day we met that I have stopped wanting you. Your voice is like a goddamn radio that, no matter what I do, I canât turn off. Itâs like Iâm infected by you, and I hate it!â his eyes burn with a mix of anger and affectionpur, his pursed lips softening as he continues. âNo good ever comes from caring this much about someone. So excuse me for being scared of ruining the only good thing thatâs happened to me in years!â
You hit him with the cushionânot with enough force to make him hurt, but enough to make a point.
âDrop it, kid.â
âIâmââ you hit him again, ânotââ and again, âstupid. I know what Iâm getting myself into,â as you attempt to raise the cushion once more, Logan takes it from your hands, throwing it on the counter. Your shoulders sag, trying to find the strength to keep going. âAnd I know for a fact,â you add, glancing at his conflicted eyes, âthat the easiest thing for me would be to walk away from you, but I canât. Itâs too fucking late.â
âYou donât know what youâre saying.â
âI do! These are my feelings, okay? Mine, not yours. You donât have the right to decide who I love and who I donât.â
Loganâs eyes squint, scanning your face. âYouâre⌠obnoxious.â
âYeah, tell me something I donât know.â
âAnd IâI love you,â he confesses, his nostrils flaring with emotion. Opening your mouth to say something, you close it moments later, your gaze locked on his. âYou could take what you said, pretend as if I didnât exist, and I wouldnât say a thing, yâunderstand? I would move cities if you asked me, because I love you that fucking much, and I want you to be happy.â
You reach for his hand, briefly intertwining your fingers with his. Looking at him through your eyelashes, you rub your fingers over his stubble. âAnd what if my happiness comes from being with you?â
Logan lets out a harsh breath, his arm curling around your waist, pressing his chest to yours. âI canât promise Iâll be the perfect boyfriend. Iâll probably makeplenty of mistakes.â
âFine with me.â
âAnd youâll be mad at me. A lot.â
âDonât worry about that. Iâll make sure itâs mutual.â
Both of you laugh then, and youâre taken aback when he brushes his nose against your cheek, silently seeking permission to kiss you. His lips move hungrily against yours, trailing his hands down your spine, pulling you closer. He breaks the kiss and laughs at your eagerness when you chase after his mouth. You end up perched on his lap as he settles into one of your kitchen chairs. Logan stares into your eyes, his gaze drifting lower. âI wonât push you away this time. Not anymore.â
Thatâs your cue to finally do what youâve been yearning for weeks. You fall to your knees in front of him, shaky fingers that graze the hairs on his happy trail. The bulge in his sweatpants is close to your face, and your mouth waters at the thought of having him between your lips. âCan I?â you ask, your voice a touch higher.Â
He draws a long breath, tilting his head slightly. âYou may, baby.â
You pull at his sweatpants and boxers, sliding them down his legs just enough to free his hard cock. As you take a look at it, you find yourself at a loss for words, the sight overwhelming. Nothing couldâve prepared you for the first taste of his precum as you envelop his head between your lips, that musky scent of his hitting you.
A whimper escapes you, and Logan hisses when you run your tongue along the slit, his hands gripping the back of your neck tightly. âFuck, darlinâ. Thought about your mouth so many times, but never imagined itâd feel this good,â he cants his hips up, causing your movements to stutter. âYou can take a bit more, canât you?â his question ends with a guttural grunt, his fingers tightening on your hair. âGotta show me how much you want this.â
Logan takes all that you give him. You lower your head further, taking in another inch of him. Sexâs supposed to feel good, but this? It feels even greater. And heâs not even inside you yet, you hear a voice murmur in your head. The hand on your nape encourages you to move faster, and you sneak a hand between your bodies, grasping him by the base. You swallow around him, eyes fluttering open when he tugs sharply at your hair..
âThaaaatâs it, honey. Just like that, want you to choke on it,â he grumbles, running his mouth just the way you like. The tip of his cock nudges the back of your throat and tears fill your eyes. You pull away to catch your breath, still stroking him as you regain composure. Loganâs gaze is intense, and he stares into your soul, his chest heaving. âWhatâs wrong, sweetheart? Dick got your tongue?â
Youâll definitely get back to that joke later.
âWill youâcan youââ
âCome on, beautiful. I donât have all day.â
God, you love it when heâs mean.
âFuck my throat,â you plead, your voice barely above a whisper.
A smile dangles on the corner of his lips. âWe both know you can be nicer.â
The fucker makes your pulse race. âCan you fuck my throat?â you ask again, more insistently. âPlease.â
He guides himself into your mouth, smirking as he watches how your eyes roll back in pleasure. âHow polite of you to say please. Some good manners youâve got.â
You whimper around him, your body responding to the rhythm he sets, fully immersed in the intensity of the moment. And for a while, you drift away, losing your sanity with each thrust of his hips, every tug at your hair. Itâs almost impossible not to compare him to your past hookups. You try to recall at least a single instance when another man made you feel this way, but no memory surfaces.
Time seems to stretch and warp. You donât really know when it happensâhe pulls you off his cock, cradling your face, examining you. âYou fucking love that, donât you?â he asks with that sweet, syrupy voice, brushing away your tears. Thereâs no room left for embarrassment, so you nod, closing your mouth around his thumb. Defeated, Logan shakes his head, pressing his finger against your tongue. âI was planning on coming on your mouth, but I think Iâve got a better idea.â
In the blink of an eye, youâre in your bedroom. Not even a metaphorâhe picks you up and basically runs to your room, closing the door behind him. You prop yourself on your forearms, trying to process whatâs about to happen. Logan, already naked, climbs onto the bed after you, He kisses you slowly, tracing the curves of your body. âYou still want this?â
âI do. Iâm just⌠nervous, thatâs all,â you admit, flashing him a quick smile. âItâs been two years of celibacy for me. Will it fit?â you ask, glancing down at his cock, and Logan stares at you in confusion. âAlso, how many girlfriends have you had? Just curious.â
âI donât think this is the time for that conversation.â
âYouâre right,â you agree, lying back on the mattress, bracing yourself for whatâs to come. âWere they pretty?â
âBub.â
âYes?â
âShut up,â he replies with a smirk. âFocus on me, okay?â
Despite your tries to crack jokes at the worst possible moment, things escalate pretty quickly. Loganâs got three fingers inside you, pumping them in and out. Heâs already made you come once with his mouthâto get you more relaxed, he had said. Wanting sounds slip past your lips as he doesnât miss the chance to hit that spot that makes you squeeze your legs together. The tip of his nose drags long lines up and down the skin of your neck, mouthing at your jaw.
âIâm ready,â you mumble after some minutes, reaching for his cock and stroking him. âLetâs break the bed.â
âYouâre lucky youâre this cute,â he says, catching your lips in a kiss. âCondom?â
âNegative, Sergeant.â
âYou donât have any?â
You shake your head, biting the inside of your cheek. âI donât want you to use one.â
The way his gaze darkens doesnât go unnoticed by you. His hand guides your face toward his cock. âGet me wet,â he commands, and you oblige, sucking him into your mouth. You hum around him, unable to contain yourself, and you hear Logan chuckling above you. âCanât believe this is what it takes for you to shut up. Gotta keep your mouth full all the time.â
Once heâs satisfied with the way youâve slicked him, he positions himself over you, caging you between his arms. Logan pins you down with his body, his hot breath mingling with yours. When you stare into his eyes, all you see is pure love, and your heart swells with affection. âWill you fuck the bad jokes out of me?â
Logan laughs, rubbing his length along your folds, grazing your clit for a fleeting second. âI sure as hell will,â he assures you, lining himself up with your wet entrance. He looks into your eyes for approval. âReady?â
âI was born reaâ Fuck!â you nearly scream as his head breaches you, your eyes squeezing shut. Turns out his fingers werenât enough. âFucking mutant dick.â
âYouâll love it, believe me,â he husks next to your ear. His arms shake where they rest on each side of your head, seemingly as affected as you are. Logan pulls out, and then fucks into you with a little more force. âHow are you still so tight? Youâre killinâ me here.â
âIâve got no idea, but you feelâamazing,â you gasp, latching onto his back, holding him close to you. His thrusts gain strength, and suddenly heâs bottoming inside you. âOh, god. I can feel you in my stomach.â
âI know, baby, I know. Can feel it too,â he curls one of his hands around your throat, keeping you in place. From his position, he can watch the way your face contorts in pleasure. Lowering his head to envelop one of your nipples between his lips, he sucks hard. âYou were desperate enough to get on your knees in the damn kitchen. Youâll be good now too, am I right?â
âYes. Yes. I can be good,â you pant, eyes wide and pleading. âAnything you want. Just donât stop.â
âIâm not stoppinâ, princess. Donât worry,â his mouth curves into a wicked grin as he drives into you again, this time even deeper. His hand on your throat tightens slightly, just enough to make you feel the pressure, grounding you in the moment. âThatâs my girl,â he murmurs against your chest, his voice laden with need.Â
Each thrust has you gasping, your body arching off the bed to meet his. Loganâs grip on your neck loosens as his hand slides down to grasp your hip. He squeezes your tender flesh, pulling you harder against him, as if he canât get close enough. The bed creaks under the intensity, but you barely notice, too far lost in the rhythm of his movements.
âYouâre perfect, all Iâve ever wanted,â he slips his free hand between your bodies to find your clit, and the moment his fingers make contact with it, you canât help but whine. âSo fuckinâ perfect,â you hear him repeat, more to himself than to you, his voice stranded as he tries to hold himself back, letting you chase your own release first.
The pressure inside you builds up, tightening with every skilled flick of his fingers. Youâre sure you must look like a mess, sweaty and sticky, though the way he looks at you makes you forget everything else. âLogan, Iâmââ you croak, the wind being knocked out of your lungs with each relentless thrust. âI think Iâm gonna come.â
He picks up speed, snapping his hips faster. âIâve got you, let go for me. Iâll take care of you, baby, I swear,â his pace becomes erratic, digging his fingers into the softness of your thighs as the headboard keeps slamming against the wall. Your body obeys him, a shuddering release tearing through you, moaning Loganâs name and gripping him like a vice. âThatâs it, fuck, thatâs it,â he doesnât stop, driving you through your orgasm. His eyes snap to your face, contemplating how wrecked you look. âTell me whereâplease, sweetheart.â
âInside.â
âWhat?â
âI said inside. Come inside me, Logan.â
Heâs not strong enough to deny you such a thing. Logan buries himself to the hilt, groaning your name as his cock twitches and paints your walls with his thick seed. Beside your head, his claws unsheate, tearing into the pillow. He ruts against you, his body trembling and writhing against yours, already apologizing for the pillow incident while pressing his forehead to your shoulder. âSorry, Iâm sorry. That hasnât happened in a while.â
When Logan collapses beside you, he pulls you into his arms, kissing you eagerly. You return the kiss, wincing as you feel a bit of his cum slip out of you, rolling down your thighs. He stares at your glistening cunt without an ounce of remorse, and you close your legs. âThatâs private.â
âIt wasnât very private a minute ago.â
âLogan?â
âTell me, bub.â
âKnock, knock.â
He must truly love you, because he plays along: âWhoâs there?â
âIce cream.â
âIce cream who?â
âIce cream for you all night long.â
âGuess I didnât succeed in fuckinâ the bad jokes out of you,â he teases softly, letting his head fall back on the bed. âBut itâs fine. Iâll just have to keep tryinâ.â
This is the story of how you end up dating a man whoâs two hundred years old. But itâs also the story of how that same man learns to let his guard down and open his heart. So, remember this, kids: the skyâs the limit, especially when it comes to loveâand yes, even when it involves dating mutants.
dividers by: @/cafekitsune thank you!!! :)
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i will not let one bitchy resident ruin my good day . affirmations
#i have a few ninregular rooms bc brenda is. idek what the fuck shes doing the the new girl. shes STILL in training and its been over a week#usually we get 3 days. daj got one.. like#and shes still taking like. an hour and a half for studio rooms... idk#it sucks bc shes getting some of my favorites likee. she got 258 which is one of my favorite rooms bc hes so sweet and i just know shes#gonna do a bad job and im like :( bc hes such a nive guy and he doesnt deserve to have his room halfassed#the other day she did her rooms super fast like 30 minutes per room#so then brenda went to check at the end of the day and. dude. it was like she hadnt been in there#one of the toilets was Caked in piss like. she didnt touch it at all.#theres a bit of a language barrier bc shes from the ivory coast so some things im like. yk i understand it might get lost in translation a#bit for sure but like. brenda writes everything down bc nee and dee are from thailand english isnt theur first language either. and brenda#is rly understanding of the language difference thats why she writes everything down so its easier to understand etc.#and ik this girl knows the steps to cleanjng the room bc. multiple people trained her. ik she knows how to clean the toilet#idk. its frustrating basically. bc i keep getting pushed to new rooms im not familisr with which slows me down bc i dont know them#and then this one was just. rly rude like cussing me out saying Youre way early like half an hour#like. im trying to fucking stay caught uppp whatever. i hate rooms that bitch at you for being early#i get it if u like have a routine thats fine but why . be a bitch abt it. you can judt say like Oh im not quite ready for you to come in#yet sorry! and ill be like oh no problem! ill come back in a bit and thats fine. but rhis guy was like Fucking christ swearing while he#walked to the door and opened it and went Youre a goddamn half hour early come back at my actual time. and i was like oh s and he judt shut#the door in my face. like. ugh
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