#vent incoming

[womp-womp-waa]

Aiden and Ben were moving.

None of them really knew where, but they know that this hangout would be the last time they see eachother. It felt unreal, the simple fact of how none of them knew the next time they'll be able to meet. Maybe in a month, maybe in a year.

The hangout was fun, it was like all of their other hangouts. It was like nothing was wrong, like nothings going to change. At the end was when the tears started to flow. The cousins were leaving early in the morning, so none of them would get a chance to say goodbye.

Ashlyn despised physical contact with people. She hated the way it made her skin crawl and how people would do it without asking her first. But this time, she clung onto Aiden almost as if she let go he would disappear. As embarrassing as it is to admit, she was crying. They all were. They knew that the group would never be the same again, not without their presence. The group will no longer be complete.

After they all said their goodbyes, Ashlyn stayed up in her room, not saying a word. They were really gone. No more of Aiden's bad jokes and no more of Ben's baking. Sobs shook her body, as the realization finally set in.

They were gone and she's never felt more alone

[theereina]

I've never known stability and safety a day in my life and that pisses me off.

Loads of Unhealed Childhood Trauma

Molested By 2 DIFFERENT Family Members As a Child With No Justice

Emotionally Immature Parents

Childhood Poverty

Covert Narcissistic Mother (Financial, Emotional, Physical Abuse)

Absent Manipulative Father (Emotional Abuse)

Manipulative, Unstable Stepfather (Financial, Emotional Abuse)

Unmedicated Mentally Ill , Violent Older Sister

Multiple Concurrent Autoimmune Diseases

Untreated and Neglected Mental Illnesses

Undiagnosed and Mistreated Physical Illnesses

Childhood Medical Neglect

Multiple Su*cide Attempts Before The Age of 12

This is just what I can remember right now.

*I was never going to post this draft, but I finally got to confront one of my abusers today.

[losergirldiari3s]

having a long distance friend is honestly getting so tiring especially when she’s better than me in like every way , my best friend moved away like 2 years ago and we still facetime and text almost everyday and honestly im so fucking sick of hearing about all her new friends every party she goes too how homecoming went EVERY FUCKING THING like ok whatever it’s cool she doesn’t wanna loose touch but like she’s so different from me she’s like rich or something casually talks about dropping hundreds going shopping or how she smokes now and all that like im so jealous of her it physically hurts don’t mention she’s literally gorgeous and thin and like how did she make all thoes friends THAT FAST and there already having sleepovers and are super close im not exaggerating when i say I have no friends like none irl i dont go to school events because i have no one to go with I dont hang out with anyone i dont go anywhere or do anything it’s like everytime we call she updates me on her life like im her social media status and i just sit there and nod because there’s absolutely nothing going on in my life i could tell her i feel like shit after like it’s not fair why can she make friends and I can’t I literally don’t understand how people make friends and ik some asshole is gonna comment “maybe if u showed some empathy and weren’t so bitter and miserable you’d have friends!” god and im so painfully aware too im filled with apathy and littarly rank people in my life somtimes i wish I knew what was wrong with me sometimes i wish i was normal why do i have to be different? but oh well! guess ill just be like this forever

[letterstokareokay]

Did I mention that I want to cut my skin off?

[1o1percentmilk]

i kind of just realized that literally everything i do is a job to me

[invertedrat]

A little reminder to any parents/guardians out there.

Don't yell fuck you to your child.

[transxfiles]

im gonna be sick

[wompwomf]

kids these days will want anything to be a trauma story for them

"my dad groomed me" and "im a ramcoa survivor"

and then when you ask them about it they end up describing their dad being a normal loving parent and they just left a church because the pastor was mean once (he was probably pointing out bad behavior in sunday school)

and as a survivor of grooming, i can't say anything on the ramcoa bit, its fucking disgusting how many kids will call me a groomer for wanting to be friends, or for calling them a nickname, you can be friends with people of other ages and not be romantic

and im sorry if this part specifically offends you, but 2-3 year age gap IS NOT GROOMING, grooming is 5 or more years apart when one or both is under the age of 18!! and 17 year olds, stop trying to make every adult out to be a groomer for trying to help you

ive met people who are actual groomers, and people who have been groomed, if an adult inconveniences you YOU ARE NOT BEING GROOMED, being groomed is when the intent is specifically and clearly romantic and or sexual INITIATIVE FROM SOMEONE OLDER, if you are making advances on an adult, youve been groomed or your fucked up, but that is on the adult to stop or block you!!! YOU making advances and them stopping you IS NOT GROOMING and im tired of people acting like it is!!!

stop pretending to have actual trauma from something non traumatic, when you ACTUALLY get groomed i will listen and console you, if you say your groomed i will believe you UNTIL i hear your story, if your story is just a normal encounter with someone 2 years or older and YOU interpreted it as romantic or sexual, im leaving you and your trauma at the door because I couldn't care less

here are the definitions if grooming and pedophilia, YOU ARE NOT BEING GROOMED!! if your experience does in fact fit into these definitions, i recommend getting help from a friend or a professional to get out of this problem, whether you are a pedophile, or are being victimized by one, and i sincerely hope everything gets better, my prayers are being sent to you and to a safe recovery 💜

[xxrawrxxprincessxx]

Floaty brain 🧠, foggy thoughts, slow limbo, rotting mind🧟‍♀️, blank stare, liminal space, numb emotions.

Sickness is wildddd 💊

[karokawwo]

i did not eat well today 😞

[belong2human-kind]

Hey guys, Clara here 🫂

This is a venting post, it has some TWs: cancer illnesses, mentions of trauma and mental disorders.

I've been very off from tumblr, feeling pretty detached from pretty much anything lately. I'm not even sure if I'm going through another depressive episode or just life itself has been pretty tough, maybe both.

I always talk about how bad OCD, generalized anxiety and ADHD get my routine and my life really messed up, but there are more things, some that only a few here know because I am always really scared to talk about, mostly because of OCD. I have a lot of different themed obsessions, but one of them includes mystical thinking ("If I say this, it will happen" or "I can't sing, write or mention the word de a th completely or I'll lose someone" etc.)

Some days, I am feeling way better about these things and I even manage to write about it, but on others, not so much. So, as I mentioned here before, I can't say the phrase, but my closest family person is facing a stage 4 cancer right now, and things have not been going the best. I lost my dad to covid at the same year and month this person discovered the cancer, same month, she also had covid at the same time. And now her brother is terminal stage on cancer too. I have the historical of this disease on both sides of my family, VERY strongly. My family isn't very united and they are not so young, plus the heavy cancer history; I fear almost everyday I'll lose everyone and end up alone, also not to mention the fear of developing it too 🥲

Because of OCD and my fears, I cannot mention who the person is, but some might have an idea by what I said, and I guess two people here know because I can talk privately about, OCD just won't allow me to mention it "public" (I know it makes no real sense, but OCD never have made any). Well, things are going pretty hard. I feel really lost :')

Lately my chronic issues have been out of control: constant asthma attacks and my asthma was so much more controlled, more rhinitis and sinusitis pain than ever that won't ever stop, not even after 4 or 6 meds, more nauseous, more insomniac (almost 3 months very badly sleep deprived because of nightmares of all these trauna :'c ), forgetting to eat, skipping classes, 0 notion of time and space progression... And after all of that, I'm still dealing with an old childhood trauma too :'c it's been too tough. I hope I can make out of this, honestly. Life has been a nightmare. Trying to find strength to face all of this :')

I haven't forgotten any of you, and I hope I'll find back motivation to be active and interact. I love this community and I feel so welcomed by everyone 🫂

Miss you all and hope you're all doing well 🫂🌻

[leos-space]

lowkey begging for someone to just come along and end me

yay

not actually going to do it, but the thoughts just keep onnnn coming

oh what fun

[dragonsruby]

There are so many things that I am astounded haven't been made into animated films or series or the like, and a hand drawn Cats musical is one of them.

Like, I get that they tried with the live-action Cats (haha), but seriously, have people not seen the old Disney classics or DeviantArt OCs or Animal Jam or Warrior Cats trends or freakin' My Little Pony?! Making something that children can easily recreate with pen and paper is the fastest way to sell toys and models and drawing books and whatever the heck else you want! People, not just children, love seeing animals on magical adventures, and if it's something that they can recreate and not just watch, you'd be selling DVDs and Blu-Rays and online viewings and meetings with the actors and Broadway re-runs?!

If media is dominated by capitalistic greed or something like that, then embrace the people who create things and sell with them in mind, not whatever popular TikTok trend is going on!

[theresafly]

Oh lord here we go

TW: mentions of suicide and sh

So uh genuine question here, what’s considered self harm?? I punch myself, kick myself and tried to suffocate myself a couple times. I’m not really sure if that’s considered sh, and I know I’ll never use a knife/scissors as a I have a deep fear of blood, injuries in general and sharp objects such as knives. I’m not really sure if I what I do is self harm, but I definitely think about killing myself, I’ve just never done it because I’m terrified at the same time. What if there is nothing in the afterlife for me, and I just float there? What if my family ends up committing as well? It’s so scary for me.

[letterstokareokay]

Why did I wake up.

[axolozzy]

hey is there a difference from stealing something mass manufactured from a multibillion dollar corporation or stealing food from homeless people. trying to see somethjng. trying to prove my family wrong