#sorry if this is all very rambly
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I love domestic/fluffy Byler so much, but what I really want is for them to be a mess.
Everything about their relationship with the involvement of the upside down and Eleven is a mess. Will is carelessly lying to Mike about El and his painting, Mike is not communicating and was being particularly distant to Will for virtually no reason on his birthday (which btw I totally don’t buy it that the Duffers and the writers room just “forgot” Will’s birthday when they remembered Will’s favorite candy just so they can have it as a silly little easter egg in like two scenes). Everything about it that has been building up to this point is just a huge pile up at this point.
They’re going to likely be with each other for most of season 5 because of the promise that they made to each other at the end of season 4 (and the BTS photos but yknow), which gives time for a lot to happen. Will and Mike are not perfect people, and it’s clear that their friendship isn’t either. The confession isn’t going to be light and fun. That pileup is going to collapse under it’s own weight and it will not be pretty at all. It’s going to be a mess, it’s going to hurt, and I am HERE FOR IT.
#not to mention the weird vague posting on the stranger things writers room account on wills birthday#also whether or not you agree mike reciprocates theres 100% going to be a confession from will at the least#my running theory is that mike finds out about the painting and confronts will and will just blurts it out in the ensuing argument#i am however not against a near death confession#these two make me so mentally ill it should be illegal#sorry if this is all very rambly#its very late but i love my two sons very much#byler#st4#st5#stranger things#will byers#mike wheeler#byler canon#byler nation#byler tumblr#byler endgame
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Holy shit I love your Dirk interpretations, it's so true and I could talk about this shit forever. I feel like another part of his character that people seem to forget (along with Roxy for some reason) is that he's from the future in solitude in an apocalyptic wasteland. I just see that part of his character always removed which is disappointing because I feel like that's a pretty big part, especially regarding his themes around technology, his brother's theme of Time, his own isolation, and how he plays in the vastness of the universe and spacetime.
Art I drew related to the subject because I like to respond to asks with art.
But absolutely. I certainly understand where the lack of discussion over his isolation + upbringing comes from, considering a majority of the fanbase that I have seen builds their ideas based on their own version of postcanon. I’m not entirely sure how that would be fixed, but certainly even in the somewhat recent past I would see a lot more content regarding his upbringing both literally and symbolically. I don’t have much to add regarding the things you’ve mentioned, because they just are what they are. Dirk being confined to a singular room left to him by a father figure he never met, in a future where the only other person left on the planet is someone he cannot pursue a relationship of because of himself, with purely 3 robots to keep him companion, one being an exact replica of his own brain who is *also* trapped inside a pair of glasses, is about as literal as it gets to me.
The contrast to me involving the flooded, organic world in comparison to the little speckle of Dirk’s apartment packed with the dude and his technics is not only a representation of his isolation and entrapment within himself, but also of his lack of control. I think his obsession with & themes of control are a direct product in the case of Dirk specifically *of* this kind of upbringing. His themes of technology are also related to his themes around control. So much of his character is actually revolved around this to me like so much. Dirk is so deeply disconnected from humanity in every way and so much of his character + symbolism is based around that.
It doesn’t even have to be about the symbolism or anything though. It’s just pretty *interesting* in the literal sense that he lives in the middle of the ocean in the future. There’s not only a lot to theorise on to do with his young life there, but on how it might affect him in the way he acts for the rest of his life. The latter part is probably what I see mentioned the most by people talking about Dirk regarding this, I’m surprised I don’t see more discussion on the former too though. I really ought to actually talk more about Homestuck stuff on here. I will do it myself.
Roxy & Dirk’s relationship is largely ignored though because there is a narrative a certain demographic spreads that Dirk resented and blamed Roxy for her interest in him, and thus too many people believe that their relationship was or would continue to be an abusive one. Realistically, I believe it’s important to acknowledge that the way Roxy treated Dirk regarding his homosexuality wasn’t right while still acknowledging the obvious amount of respect and admiration Dirk had for Roxy. I mean we have a huge piece of dialogue from their post trickster mode conversations on the quest beds from Dirk purely stating how he feels about Roxy that people completely ignore somehow. I think this usually happens to characters that are women though. I know everyone says it, but it is true. Jane gets the exact same treatment of boiling her down to solely her negative aspects. The things I see completely mischaracterising both of them are horrific.
I mean how much more explicit can it get that their relationship is obviously very important to Dirk? But I digress. I think the best or I should say “most interesting” interpretations of their relationship usually come from DirkRoxy shippers actually.
I would be interested to hear about Dirk’s relation to his brother’s theme of time though. I don’t have any thoughts on this and I don’t recall ever hearing anyone talk about it before. If you or anyone else would be willing to enlighten me I’d be thrilled.
#homestuck#homestuck fanart#hs fanart#dirk strider#blooby posting#ask#Sorry for taking so long to reply to you on this. I’ve been in more of a drawing than a speaking mood lately#which is very unusual for me. This is definitely not as much of a post as it could be but I’m still not back on my thought and speech game#I know the Roxy mention was in brackets but good lord the treatment Roxy gets from fanbase is insane. Couldn’t help myself#Sorry if anything is worded badly. I’m tired per usual#I think (with no malice in my heart) people just tend to leave out what they don’t like about characters though.#I was very briefly talking with Pomme johnegbertirl#and it got me thinking about how far a lot of people’s interpretations of characters stray from what would be realistic to canon#based on their own biases. Which I guess I probably do too to a certain degree.#I’m not one to judge people for their characterisations at all#I tend to be very forgiving when it comes to reads#but… I admit that is indeed a little disappointing to see how completely ignored some parts of his characters are.#Sorry for tangent that is tenuously related. It is relevant enough to shove haphazardly into tags#I’m glad you like my Dirk ramblings though. Thanks brother#We live on
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Sweethearts 💕
Less edited versions under the cut
+some other sketch I had of em
#kamen rider#kamen rider gavv#kamen rider valen#GavValen#or uh I think everyone calls em#chocogummy#let's take sfx pill together#mecha's shitty doodles#Anyway hope it is apparent that Valen is smiling? 'cause he is#sweetheart is tad of too mushy word for me but that's all that comes to me for this one </3#I don't even think of em in ship way yet much more of just “they look very cute together”#I honestly could talk about how I see em but uh#sadly for em my current headspace is taken by best match and idk if it'll change anytime soon#<been trying to draw something em too. but more serious so idk when I'll even finish that#anyway sorry for tags ramble I sure like doing that
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cassie sandsmark star jorts from issue #23 of yj98 you have always been famous to me
(before pic + additional photos and unnecessary ramblings under the cut)
I made these jorts in 22 hours over the course of 3 days! pure willpower via my love for cassie sandsmark because I am a total novice in sewing and i am still not very good at it. (i really just combined various tutorials and improvised on measurements and then regretted improvising measurements later on).
I thrifted these jeans last year for cassie vibes (even though I had already made her star-spangled red bellbottoms at that point) and wasn't a fan of how they fit + I couldn't figure out how to style them. I enjoyed sewing in the panels to flare them out and then everything else (cargo pockets and sewing in stars) was hell <3
the pockets are not placed well (nor are they particularly well-made), the hem is uneven, the stars are quite janky (and I think I stitched on too many), I probably stabbed my fingers a million times, and I am so in love with them
#these jorts are stained with the blood of my incapabilities but its okay because theyre already red#what should i conquer next in the cassie sandsmark wardrobe#as of current i have made: her GIRL necklace + her red star earrings + her wonder girl shirt (crop t-shirt version)#+ as aforementioned- her red bellbottoms#all of the above aside from the red bellbottoms were made for my halloween costume last year#the red bellbottoms were made last summer just bc i already had red bellbottoms that i never wore#none of the above really cycle through my everyday wardrobe#but i'm hoping these shorts will be an exception!#(i also have a very similar fit to what she wears in issue 22 of yj98- light green polo + dark blue baggy jeans)#(will probably just make an oversized ww shirt to go with my lightwash jorts for a baby cassie look.)#(should i be looking for a denim vest too... i can put a wonder woman patch on it...)#cassie sandsmark#wonder girl#cassandra sandsmark#young justice#yj98#young justice comics#wonder woman#dc#dc comics#soo much rambling happening in this post. sorry guys i've spent the last 3 days in hyperfocus mode and now i need release
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slightly over-engineered red leader tord design because i really really reaaaaallly like military uniforms & i thin k he deserves better than a hoodie under a blue trenchcoat. he doesnt tbh but i maybe deserve to see it. anyway
#eddsworld#eddsworld fanart#tord#tord eddsworld#tord ew#red leader#fanart#i imagine paul and patryck would be uhh lower ranking generals or something#maybe signified by how many cords are on their uniforms#similar outfits but tords is more bedazzled#DEEPLY sorry if this like at all resembles n/zi stuff . their uniforms are unfortunately very cool & its on purpose#i tried my best to avoid it#mostly referenced cuban and english military uniforms#u may ask. why not norwegian ones?#and the answer. is that they are Kind of boring#milosartstuff#theres no military i can reference without it kinda sucking since. its a fucking military but yknow#o yeah also just straight ripped off swat gear for his whole lower half#also i censored that word because idont want it to get filtered out. not because im afraid to say it on social media#just to befucking CLLLEAAAAR#thisis the most ive rambled in the tagsfor a while. look at my post boy
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i love your zukka art!! have you ever drawn them in a modern setting? i would love to see you interpret their clothing styles!!
sincerest apologies that their outfits are kinda boring especially sokkas, designing modern clothing for the atla gaang is very difficult for me haha
#sokka i feel like would be very casual and hed wear the same thing almost everyday#but when hes with suki you know their makeover nights go wild#zuko on the other hand i feel like would wear 'old men' clothes haha#thanks to his uncle#very earth tone very simple lots of reds/browns#with the exception of the jacket i gave him which is green#maybe he got in when living in modern ba sing se#in modern settings i just dont see him getting into emo fashion bc of his fam/personality im sorry yall#vanilla boring i know#wouldve done more maybe piercings etc but i dont want to work on this all night haha#anyways thats my ramble!#zuko#sokka#zukka#atla#avatar the last airbender#seasideoranges!art
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Imagine if Billy didn’t know Shazam died?
(This is actually apart of my AU lol)
But what if Billy didn’t know Shazam, the Wizard, was actually dead? Like maybe he did see Shazam get crushed by rocks but he just thinks a Wizard could survive that, Or he doesn’t remember meeting Shazam for whatever reason. (Like he knows it happened because his pantheon told him so, and he remembers like a tiny bit of being at the RoE, but maybe he doesn’t remember Shazam dying)
This would be kinda funny to think about, especially if the pantheon’s trying desperately not to let Billy know Shazam died. But they occasionally slip up, and each time they do Billy gets slightly more suspicious. Also, in my AU since Billy and Marvel and separate entities, I think it would be funny aswell if Marvel didn’t know either. (—which I do have an AU explanation to make it work, but I fear I may be getting too off track already.)
—
Heracles: Shazam was a good wizard.
Marvel: Was?
Heracles: IS, is. I simply misspoke—Shazam is a good wizard.
Marvel: Oh… 🧐
Billy: 🤨
—
Imagine if literally every other magic being knows Shazam’s dead, but Captain’s just none the wiser and tries to talk to them about the Wizard.
—
Zatanna: So…how’d you get your powers?
Billy (as Cap): Oh, by this Wizard, his name’s, uh…
grabs a piece of paper and scribbles the name down
Zatanna: Shazam?
Billy: Yup! Gave me my powers, have you heard of him? I think he’s very well known. I haven’t seen him in a while. Hope he’s still doing alright.
Zatanna (Going pale at the mention of a very much dead Wizard being referred to in present tense): Mhm….yeah…
—
(the league in the cafeteria, listening to one of the rare times they got Captain to talk about themself. —Billy’s just procrastinating going outside in the midwestern November cold.)
Billy: So I got my powers from this Wizard, his names…um. I think I told Zatanna? Captain looks over at her.
Zatanna (going pale): Really. I don’t remember.
Billy: Oh, okay, that’s fine! Here.
Grabs a piece of paper and scribbles down the name.
Superman: Shazam?
Every magic user in the cafeteria freezes.
Billy: Yeah! He’s the wizard who gave me my powers. I haven’t seen him since I became Captain Marvel, though. I should really go talk to him, maybe I’ll do that later.
****
Achilles: But what if we didn’t…
Hercules: How about we don’t…
Solomon: That wouldn’t be a good choice, Billy.
Zeus: I agree, you’d be just of a fool as Atlas to go.
Atlas (offended): Wow.
****
Zatanna (uncomfortable): I don’t think you should…
#Shazam was just so cool that everyone knew who he was#And when he died all the Magic beings could feel it because he was basically a key component of magic#Shazam’s ghost lonely in the RoE because his new champion won’t talk to him: where’s my boy 👴😢#The rest of the pantheon sweating whenever Shazam is brought up: 😬->😤->😅#STOP THE FUNERAL! ⚰️#I’m sorry for disappearing…again…again#guys I’m trying my teacher gives me essays every week and a test every other (if I’m lucky)#Once I finish that very late Halloween fic I’ll start posting more often.#dc#dc captain marvel#dc comics#dcu#Hcs#shazam#captain marvel#billy batson#captain marvel dc#dtc#divine twitch chat au#justice league#hc#rambles
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injury recovery…
*break an arm or two out there kids!*
#welcome back to another episode of cae breaking Dazai Osamu ft Nakahara Chuuya#no but imagine Dazai trolling and being a brat just to piss Chuuya off#but then when he realized that Chuuya is actually taking care of him he starts to mentally shut down#anyways I just want more skk taking care of each other#maybe in next week’s episode we will have—*gets shot*#blushing dazai is my favorite comfort#Chuuya taking care of dazai is also my favorite food#Im betting that dazai informally helped shaped chuuya’s education tho djdhchnd#i said what I said dazai fell first but Chuuya had mother hen instincts of worrying first#sorry if I am very unoriginal and boring at this point bc all I have to offer these days are *gestures hands* brainrots#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bungou gay dogs#skk#soukoku#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#my art#sketches#rambles in the tags again oops#fluff#tooth rotting fluff#domestic teen skk !!!#sketch
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[reupload] copycat
#SORRY FOR THE REUPLOAD. I FORGOT THE CHROMATIC EFFECT. its fixed now. ^_^ rb as you please.#gonna put the og posts tags at the very end!#animator vs animation#alan becker#green ava#<- in a way.#green screen ava#greenscreen ava#||#kitkat chitchat#doodles.png#okay heres the og tags. just a ramble about my design#::#fun fact; aspects of greenscreens clothes are taken from my designs for the rest of the cg!#the pants are from red. skirt from yellow. tanktop from blue. and drawing glove from orange!#i was also gonna add green and reds friendship bracelets but i felt itd clutter the design with Too Many Colors . as if it already isnt lol#also the actual colors for the clothes are Slightly different.. i put a few overlays on this for color cohesiveness so if anything looks#wonky then that is why..... if i ever do something with flat colors then ill make sure the actual clothes colors look nice for you all :3#anyways. the influencer arc is going great so far huh!
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they would get divorced in one universe just to find eachother in another one
alternatively titled: sometimes you're the level-headed token flesh-head impulse-control-and-polycule-member of a stubborn, eccentric, and hearty telephone-headed drug addict, and there's cruelty in the world you deem fit to suicidally fight, and that either goes about as well as you'd expect it to, or you learn about love and the value of your life and junk along the way
#scribbles#milton r wallace#callum crown#phonegingi#sgt norm allen#norm allen#dialtown#dialtown a phone dating sim#..uh idk if callum and milt have a ship name orz#normgingi#milton norm parallels save me. Save me milton norm parallels#very specific but its why i prefer to look at the callum-milt-marla situation as like tragic polyamory#as opposed to a cheating one#it adds to the callum-gingi parallels. theyv both got polycule situations C:#though i suppose you could call a cheating situation a dark parallel to gingi's polycule the same way you could call#milton's entire deal a dark parallel to their relationship with norm/the narrator#However i just like tragic polyamory. my visions of milton and marla ALSO being in love yet having the mutual#realization that they hate callum more than they love eachother (esp milton) is highly specific yet also everything to me#misery loves company and all that jazz. a THIRD combination of people having divorce shit going on#this guys ruining my life IM GONNA FUCK HIS WIFE! (They are already in a consensual polyamorous relationship milton is just making it weird#Sorry these tags were going to be like meaningful discussion about this art and then i was enabled to talk about THIS AGAIN#OH YEAH this art in particular i discovered halftones and also started actually using blending brushes#milts face isnt drawn. obviously. but im imagining a kind of 'oh you!' exasperated fondness#as opposed to norm who's just a cranky little tsundere. jokes on milt though HIS relationship is HEALTHIER#also i will never pass up the chance to draw gingi and callum together#theyr both characters i adore drawing gingi's round shapes and different textures and callums cute little bolts#but also they do look soooo similar and yet so different its always really fun to do#and theyr just. my favs lol. my top 3 favs go gingi-mingus-callum hehe#Ok thats all. thank you for coming to my rambles#fig said i should post my art at better times and so i am and that means when i post my art im AWAKE ENOUGH TO RAMBLE ABOUT IT LOL
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"ooooh thank you! Thank you! Thank you!!!"
They'd be good friends I like to thinmk
#hoppy being very super touchy when happy or excited#catnap being touch averse with some exceptions (and preferring prior warning)#hoppy forgetting this fact and grabbing n' tugging him around when she gets excited anwyas (she'll apologize later)#they're so sillyyy#all the ways the critters get along on a one by one basis is so interesting to me I like to think about what makes them all click#im rambling again oops oops hoppy catnap friendship is also peak i take no criticism /silly#poppy playtime#poppy playtime chapter 3#smiling critters#smiling critters fanart#catnap#hoppy hopscotch#poppy playtime fanart#sorry for disappearing for half a week I got sick and then just. didn't really draw sorry about that one chat#thats pretty normal behavior for me actually dw if I ever go silent for a while that's my norm unfortunately
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I love it when you guys like all of my posts but sometimes you'll get to the veryyy old stuff and it's so embarrassing cause my art looked SO different and also THE STORY WAS SOO DIFFERENT (I retconned lot of stuff at some point)
But also I'm so glad this comic is finally being posted and seeing old posts getting attention reminds me of how much I've progressed ♡ so that's nice
Still embarrassing ...
But very nice♡ glad to see new people finding this au everyday
#STILL SO EMBARRASSING#LIKE THE ART WAS NOT HMM YEAH NO#and the lore inconsistencies in the old stuff ohnoo....#I retconned a lot of things#rn the story is all done but back then I just had a very simple idea of it and aughh#but YAY#AND AAAA#AND DON'T GIVE UP ON YOUR AU'S#IT'S SO COOL ACTUALLY GETTING TO THE POINT OF POSTING THE PAGES#okay that's it I just wanted to ramble#I wonder how many people here have been following this au since 2022 kajshsldhskddj SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO START#I'M A PERFECTIONIST#yippe
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thinking about what was going through L’s mind as he lay in bed, the same night that light and him were in the helicopter.
after insisting at every turn that the brilliant teenage boy smiling before him had to be kira, was — no, is forever kira, he finally can look into light’s eyes and see what he always knew was there.
a murderer, a sociopath, a villain, a liar. yes, everything has gone to plan. light is kira; kira is light.
the boy he has spent the last few months monitoring, mapping, and mythologizing, is kira.
kira is the boy who has watched L type genius nonsense on his computer in the dark, shared a fourth of the key lime tart that watari served after misa and matsuda returned alive, listened to L babble 19th century french poetry when progress had slowed to an unbearable crawl.
yes, light is all that and a million other dirty things, packed tight and wound up in the shape of a classical greek statue, an eighteen year old boy, japan’s top student.
kira.
that thought should bring him joy. satisfaction. relief, even, that his deductions would never miss their mark. and it does. elation lights L up on the inside, or perhaps on the outside going in, like being doused in water and feeling it sink into his bones.
it’s wonderful, it’s horrible; he didn’t know warmth could feel so cold.
because at the quite literal end of the day, this is what he’s been chasing, isn’t it? his culprit, his criminal, his killer.
so why, when sharing a bed with him, inches from his skin and from exposing the truth, does L want to see light within those eyes again?
he reminds himself its ridiculous. they aren’t separate entities, like a parasite and its host. rather, one incorrigible unit, a package deal, something he signed up for at the start. a plant with rot already spreading through its roots that L simply had to deliver back into the soil.
he’s never really had a green thumb, anyways.
gnawing on his nail, L rolls over in their bed, observing the light-shaped god slumbering in total darkness. kira is so pale that his skin brightens the night. his breathing shakes the earth and breaks waves beneath L’s skin.
so the world’s greatest detective decides to shift a little closer. and recites heart attack symptoms in his head until he falls asleep.
#eggo expresses#death note#l death note#l lawliet#light yagami#lawlight#if anyone actually reads all of this i’d be very impressed#sorry for yapping#somethimes i just get. . fhsss thoughts!.. yaknow#dont mind my rambling if its ass i just needed to expel this from my system#i am such a sucker for their freaky weird domestic-esque moments
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2024 Abu Dhabi GP
#max verstappen#autumn posts#and of course Alain Prost!!#this moment is very much me thirsting tho 😵💫#his chesttt his hips his hair looking so BLONDE in the sun!!!!#🫠💫✨#sorry all the spam this morning!!#also I usually don't give too much thought to follower counts on tumblr dot com#folks should make the space they like!! follow and unfollow freely#but I did loose a couple folks and I wonder if it was all the asks ahhh#like definitely if someone is looking for f1 content then random factoids about this Texas gal are Not interesting hehe#but I'm trying to open up a bit more!#I even had some thoughts on Daniel I deleted ahh still trying to figure out where to blog about heavier stuff but probs not on main#this blog is more to escape the real world and bite Max's lovehandles in my mind#with maybe the occational ask game!!#but I'll probs keep my writing on the other blog and my heavier feelings in the old diary...idk figuring it out but its not that serious too#just rambling before work!!#but anyways!! 2025 year of being more open#if you are reading this then hello 😶🌫️ btw ricciardo133 is my fanfic writing space#I'll be waxing poetic about my Max and Daniel feelings there#and yearning over this man's hips and tummy and thighs my goshhhhh#😵💫❤️✨#anyways!!!#hope its an excellent time of day wherever you may be 🌇🏙️🌃#mentally I'll be here 😵💫😵💫😵💫
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new dad Bakugou who’s going back to work full time almost a full year after his daughter his born and he now has to grapple with the fact that….goddamn, he’s spoiled the shit outta her.
well, he doesn’t think it was spoiling her. in actuality, he just created a routine with her, gave her every bit of his attention, held her when she cried, scolded her (yes just at eight months) whenever she’d babble for more puffs even though she’s had enough already. it wasn’t spoiling, it wasn’t. he vowed to never be that dad, to raise a snot nosed brat, one similar to himself.
but here he is, on a Tuesday morning three weeks after her first birthday. he’s standing halfway between the front door and the living room in full uniform, with his still sleepy baby and her even sleepier mama. she’s gripping his neck like he promised to abandon her, wailing and crying so loud and dramatically, that you can’t help but chuckle at her antics and how he wavers ever so slightly.
“You promised you’d go back to work,” you scold him gently, rubbing at your daughters quivering back when she whines again the moment he acts like he’s gonna pull her off. Bakugou frowns at you, and you shrug, smoothing her unruly blond curls away from her sticky forehead.
“But you guys need me.” He pouts, eyebrows downturned as he pulls her away enough to wipe at her wet face. she blubbers again, whimpering out a small dadaaaa noooo, that absolutely breaks his heart.
“And so does the world.” You smile at him, gently pulling your daughter away from the matching glassy red eyes who watch her go. “We’ll be fine, my love. Promise.”
Bakugou looks unconvinced, especially since your daughter reaches for him with another cry of his name. you don’t say anything when he sniffles discreetly, quickly reaching down to the coffee table to snatch up his utility belt that he dropped when she waddled out of her room in tears. he snaps it on wordlessly, and you go to turn to the kitchen when he wraps you both up in his arms.
“Love you,” he whispers against your forehead before pecking it, leaning down to kiss your lips next, and then your daughter’s fat little cheeks. He whispers another love you to her, and wipes away at her rosy cheeks when she pouts at him.
“Rub you.” your daughter pouts, the both of you freezing in shock.
“Oh my god,” you whisper, grinning. “She said I love you back!” Bakugou matches your grin, laughing under his breath as he presses another torrent of kisses all of her face. for the first time since she’s opened her eyes today, she laughs, loud and joyous and familiar. he thinks that maybe going back in today won’t be so bad after all. not if this is what he’ll be coming home to.
#I have been tormented with dad bkg thoughts again I fear#he’s too loveable for his own good#but also the thought of bkg becoming a dad and vowing he’d be this certain way#but then his kid comes out and he’s like. yes. values. parenting skills. life lessons. discipline and love.#and then all of it goes out the window when they just look at him#and they look so much like him and they’re just so cute and annoying and. now he’s brought them everything they’ve ever wanted LOL#also I love toddlers who speak like non conventionally/stereotypically#like my youngest niece turns all of her consonants to ‘h’ for 2 syllable words#and it’s so funny bc everything sounds like ‘huh hah huhh’#but she’s also VERY clear when she wants to be lol she just gets excited sometimes and forgets to enunciate#okay rambling sorry but I love babies LOL#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#bakugou treats! 🍬#dad bkg
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Hey, I’m just here to say you’re extremely missed and that, even though there’s probably not much I could say to make any of the bad things less awful, I’m hoping for an easier and gentler future for you soon. Take care, ok?
Oh man, thank you so much for sending this, and I'm sorry it's taken so long to respond (and to the other person who sent me an ask, too—I'm not sure when I'll get to it but please know it was seen and means so much). It has just been. So awful. I won't dump on the public at large everything that's happened, you don't need that novel, but it feels like every day life's falling apart more and more.
Just, seriously, thank you for sending this, and to the couple of people who checked in with chats (again, I'm sorry if I haven't responded yet, spoons are just very limited). There have been a lot of times throughout this where I get overwhelmed by everything going on and some truly horrific people I've met in the fandom and I've considered deleting everything permanently! Very often!!! Tbh I'm still struggling with that VERY intense urge while writing this. I feel so unsafe, and scared, and run down.
And tbh, it's really hard to believe anyone could care about me when I feel so awful and worthless, I feel like it must be an obligation, or I somehow accidentally manipulated people, but I'm trying to cling to that being the brain demons talking. Because I really appreciate the time and effort anyone's taken with me. And I really miss fandom and fun, even if it's weighed down with some significant trauma—I still love the stories and the characters and, most importantly, the amazing people I've met here. Outside of any fandom I've poked around in, the wonderful people I've met matter the most, and I'm trying to cling to that.
I really enjoy talking with everyone, running little projects/events, and for the first time in years actually writing again. (I've been slowly plucking away at that AU I mentioned a few times and I want to start posting for an event this month but! Ahhh!!!) I would like to try and be active again, and I'm so sorry for just being such an absolute goddamn mess. I feel like this is all too much to even say, but I do want to just be honest about all of it. Still, again, thank you so much for reaching out <3 And I'm sorry this is so ridiculously long even though I don't feel like I'm saying much and nothing important, I didn't intend for this answer to be a word-vomit update, just. Things suck, but you guys are good, and I hope things are as okay as you can be on your side of the screen <3
#Ask#shiromouse#Yadda yadda#I feel really bad for even saying all this honestly kasjndkasjdn#I'm really so sorry if this is too much#The guilt has been especially bad since I was... uh baited let's say#A very very bad incident#Done by a 'friend' in the fandom maybe about a year ago now#It's just been so hard to trust and feel okay and exist man#Because you can't forget#It makes it so hard to want to exist#And my house is falling apart my animals keep getting sick#I swear it's something new every day#ANYWAY time to stop rambling#I'm gonna try to restart the queue in the next few days I just still feel... overwhelmed#That's why I stopped it#I just couldn't stand existing#BUT YEAH#GOTTA STOP RAMBLING
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