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#sorry i've been rambling about this for so long
yanderemommabean · 2 days
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Hey It's been a while
First, I just want to apologize for being gone as long as I have. Things got to a heated point at home, and I had to postpone my move until August while facing some health concerns.
Im finally out of that god forsaken house. But it wasn't easy. They cornered me, and I cried for six hours trying to just hold on until the next day when I could go.
Im so so so fucking sorry I havent been able to be on here. I know you all must have been worried sick, and I should've at least made some update posts, but Ive been stressed as all hell in my new home trying to get insurance figured out so I can get insulin, trying to get a job for rent and Sammy's meds (he got diagnosed with heart worms, and im devastated at how long it's been going on so we're trying like hell to get him better, ive been up days in a row worried sick about it while waiting on job offers and its killing me).
I got to take Pixie, and she got checked out too and I havent heard anything, so that's good! I've been sick and trying to figure everything out, and was just not able to write like ive been wanting to. I had to leave behind one person i really didn't want to, who unfortunately is stuck with my family, and its also been eating at me.
I'm alive, just stressed and sick and trying to heal from abuse and the shock of not being yelled at for being sick and scared and making mistakes.
Again, Im so sorry you guys. I should have tried to update at all, I've just had so much going on and so much sickness. I am so grateful to have you guys at all, and the sweet messages you sent me made me smile when I finally logged in and read them.
I can't guarantee an everyday post like I usually used to do, but I'm going to try and at least be back more than I have been! I love you beans. I'm so sorry for the radio silence. Everything came to a fever pitch and has been nonstop trying to get settled in since I finally got away, which was the end of August. Before that, I was sick, unable to stand up without passing out, and barely eating because the abuse was so bad that staying in my room and starving was better than any interaction. I wont go into too much detail but the abuse was another large part I didn't want to post. Just bed rotting and hoping time would speed up to get me out of there.
Anyway, this was a terrible ramble, I'll hush, but thank you all so much for your messages, and im happy to be back! Even if just a bit at a time for now until im more settled in <3
Much love!
-Mommabean
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Hi so I was having some brainrot regarding your small-town-neglected-meta reader and I wanted to share them with you!
One thing I've been thinking about alot is the way readers powers work and what kinds of weather they're likely to create, etc. One thing I specifically thought about is that readers powers definitely have to come from her mom's side. Bruce and no else in Bruce's biological line have powers so readers mom has to have the meta gene. I was thinking that maybe readers mom also controlled the weather a bit, maybe not as strong as reader can but still had some powers.
Like creating little drizzles, maybe some dustdevils, and little snow storms. Because her powers were so weak she never really used them for much, maybe to help out her own parents on the farm but that's about it(using her rain powers to easily water the crops)
In that same line of thinking I also wondered if readers little brother also has superpowers. Maybe the way his powers work or appear are bit different than readers because of they have different dads(I imagine Bruce has really strong genetics. If Damian is any proof of that lol)
One little crank in this little headcanon though is that Nana and Gramps would also have to have superpowers. But then I reread the first chapter and thought about One of the phrases you used to describe how reader got in Bruce's hands.
"but blood is thicker than water in the eyes of the court."
That specifically makes me think that Nana and Gramps are actually readers little brother biological grandparents and not theirs.(what happened to their bio grandparents 🤔)
But anyway, one last thing I wanted mention is how badly I want to see reader using their powers more freely when they're back in small town. Like they aren't afraid to use their powers to make it super windy and have fun with their little brother up on the sky. Or causing a blizzard just so they can have a snowball fight and make snow-men with their little brother. Or even accidently cause a power outage because someone pissed them off! No more suppressed emotions just freedom. (Also reader crying in the middle of the rain they made in front of their parents graves(they wanted to be buried in their hometown) would be so tragically fantasic.)
Anyway I know this is a lot to read and I'm sorry if I seem a bit scrambled but I wanted to send this to you just cause I had so many ideas floating up in my brain I couldn't stop thinking about it all. Thank you for listening to me ramble, I hope your doing amazing🩷
Your call this bain-rot, Imma call it fertilizer. This is long as mess, but I think I addressed everything. Lots of Smalltown!Reader lore and I made a Family Tree to help explain if needed.
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Smalltown!Reader's Family Tree:
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Complicated little bugger, ain't it? I didn't add Stephanie or Barbara because Bruce technically never adopted them or fostered them. This isn't an official thing, I made this and it was composed of little bits of information I found online. So some of this stuff might not be lore accurate.
Also, while I was researching I found out that Bruce's middle name was apparently Patrick, after his grandfather at one point.
Now, time for the pseudo science.
I consider the meta gene to be a genetic trait carried down by a parent. That would be Momma/Adeline, in this case. She carries the gene. Now, the meta gene does not always activate even if one has it. So, no, Momma was not making mini storms for us. She was, however, very encouraging of Reader using their abilities. It takes an event, usually a traumatic one, to activate the gene. (Little Brother could be getting power's in the next chapter, though.)
As for Nana and Grand Daddy we have this:
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They don't have the gene, so they don't have abilities. (Which doesn't me their harmless.) They are Reader's Step-Grandparents, but they've grown to love them all the same. Now, in court, it is preferred for a child to go to the nearest blood relative after their parents die. Or, at least, that's what I roughly know from what the court in my state is like. I'm not from Louisiana or New Jersey, where Gotham's located, so maybe it's different. But, this is fiction. This is why Nana and Grand Daddy didn't get custody of Reader, though. Plus Bruce is rich with a bunch of adopted kids, on paper he looks like the best option.
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I really love the thought of Reader using their abilities for silly little things while back in Smalltown, at least before things absolutely go to hell in a hand basket. So I'll probably include a bit. (They used to do things like that before moving to Gotham, definitely.) Something I want to mention is that Reader likes to make it rain when their happy. It's their favorite weather, they love it. So a grave scene might be a bit different. (I have to include that now. Thank you for that idea! Frick, Part Eight about to be long af.)
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If your curious about Reader's other grandparents, they just died from old age and health problems. I like to think that Reader had a close relationship with them. Calling them MawMaw and Gab for their nicknames and having spent a lot of time with Reader and their Little Brother before they died. (I'm sorely tempted to just commit to rewriting this with the OC I based Reader off of so I can include all this backstory to highlight how different their life in Gotham is compared to what it used to be, but I best finish what I started first.)
(Side Note: It's very common in the American south for people to give their grandparents nicknames. I have some for my southern grandparents, while I call my northern grandparents just plain Grandma and Grandpa. The nickname can vary and is usually what ever the first grandchild comes up with.)
Thank you for sending me this ask! Stuff like this actually inspires me so this was wonderful. Hopefully this helps. (Now to get back to work on my writing, I've been draggin' my feet again.)
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warning-heckboop · 17 hours
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Omg hi! I absolutely LOVE your changeling au I have been intrigued ever since I saw it! Tbh I find it very interesting that you went with the direction of Peri just not liking Dev at the moment. Most people write him forgiving Dev after talking about how they both could have communicated better, but it's really interesting seeing Peri just upset at Dev. I both want to say it's justified but also want to punch him lol. Anyway! I do have a question. Since Dev got his memories wiped would it be possible for him to be given them back now that he's transforming? If it's possible it seems like it would be the smart thing to do since he's gonna learn about faries again anyway and at least with his memories back he'll understand a bit more what's happening and trust everyone to help him. Him and Peri could even have that make up talk. Just a thought sorry for the long ask lol
Apologies for the late reply. I got this ask before the other asks in which I was rambling about Peri's character, but I just kind of got off on a tangent with that.
I'm so glad you enjoy the au!! As for your question, it's definitely something I've been thinking about. I definitely think it's possible for Dev to get his memories back, since we've already seen a child with wiped memories get them back before in the original series, iirc. What's been up for debate in my mind is regarding who would want him to get them back right away, and who wouldn't.
It might seem like a no brainer that everyone would just want him to remember right away, because that would help avoid the additional distress of Dev having to focus on relearning all about fairies while also already going through all these physical changes. But what makes me hesitate is what I've mentioned before about how, at least in the eyes of the Fairy Council, Dev is supposed to be living a relatively happy childhood to make up for his father's. Giving Dev his memories back means giving him back the knowledge that he caused so much pain and chaos, and almost killed multiple people, including some of the only people whose ever actually cared for him. It's not exactly the kind of knowledge most people can be happy living with.
So I'm leaning towards it being the case that, while Jorgen could easily restore Dev's memories, he's been instructed absolutely not to, at least for the time being, by the Fairy Council in order to maintain the possibility that Dev could still be a happy, normal child again once he's made it through the hell that is precocious magic puberty.
That's not to say, of course, that Dev might not manage to start remembering things on his own, with all that unstable magic coursing through his veins, and being around Peri through a majority of this process.
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machinegrl · 1 year
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demaparbat-hp · 5 months
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Almost
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science-lings · 6 months
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Out of every ship i have been invested in, which isn't a whole lot but still, I think that narumitsu is the most justified in being the most painfully slow burn to ever have burned. Like, it's obvious to literally everyone around them that there is something between them but it still takes twenty years to do anything about it. Not because they're stupid but they're both just specific types of fucked up that make getting into a relationship kind of impossible.
They're both seemingly very reluctant to get into any sort of romantic relationships in the first place, one due to general disinterest and a truly incredible amount of emotional constipation, and the other due to his last (and only known) relationship being so fucked up that he kind of gave up on the concept entirely. Them being excruciatingly in denial about being in love for decades is just so in character because they're just Like That.
Their history is also complicated enough to warrant waiting around for each other forever, there's so much baggage and trauma and hurt between them that it's just crazy. They've saved each other and they've hurt each other and they push each other away, they owe each other their lives and their jobs and their hopes. They would do anything for each other but are still pretty justified in being afraid to take the last step into making their relationship not just platonic.
idk it feels like a lot of other ships fall into the infuriatingly slow romance because the characters are too stupid to take a hint and it's just kind of painful after a while but these are the most hilariously repressed characters I have ever seen and while they might be stupid about their own feelings, it's usually stemming from trauma which is far more interesting for me personally lol.
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spookygibberish · 6 months
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Dogstock are typical of what are often deemed the ‘evil’ races in many other fantasy works. They were created by some higher force to be slaves, they are carnivorous by nature, they resemble animals other than human in dentition and build. They growl and bite and walk behind.
The Uhasr (a dogstock culture) are descendants of such slave-infantry that was abandoned when the empire that used them to capture the steppes decided the land wasn’t so profitable after all, and more pressing matters drew their attention elsewhere. Like tools left spent on the ground, the unneeded, excess dogstock were left to survive on their own in Hochkiskuph. The native peoples, of course, did not welcome them any more, or see them any less as oppressors when the hand released the lead. To the Hochkiskuph peoples, the Uhasr are a predatory ghost, an echo that consumes them even in absentia. To the Uhasr, one human is much like another, differing in number and equipment, but never in essence. Uhasr are a species of wild animal with a human face. Humans are prey on two legs. Humans smoke and poison uncovered dens on principle, Uhasr abduct and consume men and women and children all the same.
A common trend I have noticed in media which aims to humanize monsters, is that it often relies on passivity. Humanity is contingent upon kindness. The monster that is A Person only so long as they are a harmless thing at heart, something which can be understood and befriended. Their violence is reluctant, their hearts noble. Grace is a concession to the dominated. Only the toothless beast, declawed and pinioned and caged, is one which has earned its personhood. The ontological enemy supersedes the ontological man.
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kyouka-supremacy · 5 months
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Hi. I've calmed down a bit, and I think it's better if I just take a break from Tumblr for a while. Right now, I don't feel the fandom to be the same chill and safe space as I felt it to be, so I'd rather take some time until I can feel comfortable again with posting. All my side blogs will be on hiatus too. I'm terribly sorry for any discomfort this may cause.
A deep, wholehearted thank you to anyone who reached out in the last hours in replies, asks and dms to share their support and love. Seriously, you can't imagine how much it meant to me, how meaningful every single message I got was to me. Yesterday I was really believing my blog didn't bring anything but negativity and hatred to the community; thank you for reaching out to tell me I was able to share a little happiness, too. Words cannot express how indebted I am to you; you made me feel again like the posting I made on my blog was worth it, for you alone.
I don't think I'll deactivate for the time being. The temptation is still very strong, but I've poured so much time and dedication and love on this blog, I don't think it'd be fair to delete it. I hope in the future there'll still be people who my posts can make happy.
Lastly, I want to apologize once again to the people for whom my posts evoked so many negative sentiments. I know it's impossible to avoid, but I'm still sorry that happened. I apologize to you.
Please, be kind to each other. Make some ss/kk posts on my behalf while I'm away :)
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Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.
I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.
I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??
Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.
#ghostbusters#egon spengler#nikolas posts#I have so many thoughts on it because I've just been rewatching the two movies on loop for the past few days.#All we got was Ray saying that he'd started talking about the end of the world (IIRC) and that he went insane and took everything#when he eventually left to deal with it on his own#which for the record it's extremely impressive that he would've stopped Gozer from returning BY HIMSELF. The only reason it hadn't worked#was because of the electricity issue#Hiding all the traps and setting up the proton packs to fire at the hell pit?? Insanity. He's just on a complete different level of existin#Like they were aware of Ivor Shandor and his plans long before??? They found his ISLAND DEDICATED TO GOZER who had full intention of#BRINGING THEM BACK#it's really Really REALLY not this deep but I have thoughts and I wanted to share them. Maybe someone else might have an idea I#couldn't think of or might have something to add.#I guess it could be a 'they beat Gozer once and assumed they were gone' but that wasn't the first time Gozer 'died' so??#if I missed something Please tell me. I haven't watched the newer movies as much as the older ones (I grew up watching them / playing#the game so I'm more familiar with the older lore and haven't had the chance to rewatch the newer ones 1000 times over unfortunately)#so it's entirely possible I missed something#I'd think maybe it was just because they were older but I really don't think thats the case. I have reasoning for it but I need to do#the math to make sure I'm getting the ages right by the time AfterLife happens.#really need to make a chart / timeline of all the events that happened and what year / month / day they happened. That's a project#for tomorrow perhaps.#anyways if anyones reading this sorry for the insane rambling and congrats for making it to the end#also this post isn't negative I adore the newer movies so much. I love them a lot and I genuinely don't really care about this at all#just a thing to think / ponder / speculate about if that makes sense#I enjoy thinking about stupid irrelevant stuff like this#so so so many thoughts
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marclef · 9 months
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THE EYHM COLLECTION GROWS!!!! managed to make some space without having to move too much so they can all be together!!
(i made the smaller ones into stickers bc i'm running out of picture frames!! hope that's ok!)
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THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE WHO'S GIFTED THESE TO ME THOUGH!!! I'M CALLING ALL OF YOU OUT HERE BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!! ❤❤❤❤❤
*sharp inhale* @eskariolis-con-salsa @oddpizza @woobab @the-little-knight @moon9931 @misdreavusplush @noodletime @witch-tower-au !!!!!!!
hope you all have a good holiday season!! love you all! *MWAH*
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flamestar126 · 7 months
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Give me a "M"!
(click for better quality)
Bonus + related art + rambling under the cut
Originally I just wanted draw Dexter in a cheerleader outfit (an excuse to put him a skirt for pure funsies) and so I did! Which is art is below that i drew like a long time ago now.
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It was just Dexter at first but I am a dexdark shipper so I had to have him react somehow. Then I remembered there was a comic about an athletic Mandark so I added him in his outfit from the comic.
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Then my mind like it always does, wandered and created a short story to make sense of why they would be in this position in the first place.
~~~
After years and years of competing with Dexter relentlessly, Mandark had gotten into a rut during his high school years. He's absolutely frustrated that he's STILL second best to him.
(The time the art is placed is late hs years)
So what does a teen genius do? He explores outside of the science community and what do you know. . . he's actually not half bad at sports. He quickly abandons science for it. Mandark is thriving. Why didn't he try this sooner? And Dexter? He's so confused. Never thought his greatest rival would ditch him science for a mere physical activity. Determined to find the bottom of this he goes directly to the source of his confusion and asks. It goes as well as you think. Not at all. Plan B. Find a way to get close enough without raising too much suspicion. How? Cheerleading.
It honestly wasn't that hard to join. He's cute and flexible enough due to the battle he's faced through out the years. Plus a recommendation from his dear sister, Deedee, quickly received him a spot.
(HAVE YOU SEEN HIM DO FLIPS IN THE START OF EGO TRIP?? BOY IS READY)
The idea seemed brilliant at the time. That is until he found out he had to wear a skirt of all things. Deedee secretly tricked as a little bit of revenge. It wasn't too bad in the end. He rocks skirt ngl. With the excuse of having come to rehearsals and games that involved Mandark, things have become much easier to keep a closer look on him.
His sudden presence certainly didn't go noticed. Mandark's eye often drifted to the redhead that cheered him on during events. And oh, what an ego boost. His former rival cheering on? Yelling out his number whenever he had the ball? Wishing for him to succeed? Even if it was for only the cheerleaders' expectation to do so. How addicting.
He cornered Dexter right after. "That 'M' for me, McPherson?" Mandark teased. Knowing the "M" was their school's name. "How kind of you." "In your dreams, Astronomanov." It continued on like for a while.
They lap it like fucking cream. They've missed this. The feeling buried was bubbling up to the surface once again. Stealing quick glances, the playful jabs, grins matching the other's.
Who made the first move? It wasn't clear. It seemed so natural to be in the other's presence. Both just eased into they didn't even noticed.
Meanwhile, the science department was taking heavy losses. They lost their best two students. Ended up begging the two come back.
Eventually Dexter and Mandark did return but as partners this time.
. . . Douglas? He was thrown out of the loop about the entire thing. He missed out a lot when watching from afar. No one told him they were switching sides! What the heck guys. :/
He wouldn't survived the switch anyway. He's athletic pathetic. Stay on your game boy, Douglas. It's better this way.
~~~
Details I didn't include
Mandark was indeed incredibly suspicious of Dexter's switch
He was a total tsundere about Dexter's outfit (he did like it)
They had a talk about why they made a switched. talk about it and sealed it with a kiss (maybe :3)
Mandark said science for geeks but he's a geek through and through. he couldn't resist science for too long
Sports department was crying after
They do the same thing in college but in different uniforms (already drawn but not sharing that here :>)
I'm definitely forgetting more details but i am drawing blanks here
~~~
Bonus!
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"You know there are male cheerleaders, right?"
"I like the breeze it gives." Half truth. Was told they ran out of male uniforms. <- Lie by Deedee
"Hm. If you say so." Gay panic
Inspired by a scene of Daffy Duck from Looney Tunes (2011)
Thank you for reading!
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✨ challenge: make a poll with five of your all time favourite characters, and then tag five people to do the same, and see which character is everyone's favourite ✨
i was tagged by @scattered-stardust and @alwaysandforeverlost <3 thank you lovelies <3
tagging: @live-from-flaturn @toppingjeffsatur @shou-jpeg @vegasandhishedgehog @eriingo @arewedoneyet
it's six people because i can't count and now i'd be too sad to untag someone :( SORRY
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rakkuntoast · 1 year
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my enjoyment of philever is a constant battle of deciding if its funnier them getting platonically involved or forever being permanently in his boyfailure era
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turtlespancake · 2 months
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes 😭😭#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#“ouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes away” and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline 😭😭 every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#“character who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look back” VS#“character who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal with” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#“ok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.”#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though 😭😭 because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like “why are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.” and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is 😭😭 anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#“is it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elements”#like bitch what are you talking about 😭😭 YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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meanya · 2 months
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I think the internet has divided us on issues and politics because talking about problems and bad things on the internet isn't the same as in person.
The other day, a friend who's more politically active thank I am invited me to go door-to-door advocating for a local Senator running for office. I was nervous about this, but luckily we didn't get a lot of negativity or anger from neighbors. Matter of fact, a lot of people said they'd met the Senator, has been to his rallies, had had drinks with the man, new his wife even! Felt so weird to hear that. When I think of election season all I can think about is Trump and Biden, I almost forget the importance of local elections and just how tight-knit those relationships are...
One guy we met said the Senator had complimented his old fancy car while going door-to-door a few years ago, and he knew he'd vote for him after that.
I've been thinking about that ever since. He complimented his car...
It's really sunk in since I heard that that the way we experience and understand problems is through personal connections. That's how we empathize with people, that's how we understand the different dimensions of a problem. Not through articles or even statistics, but through conversation.
I believe that a political Tweet with a thousand likes will likely have less of an impact on a thousand people's beliefs than one conversation between two friends will impact those 2 people's beliefs. Connections matter. Knowing a person before diving into what they think/believe means everything.
That's hard to come by on the internet though. Not impossible, but hard. Even here on Tumblr, the first thing you see on a new person's blog is a summary of who they are and maybe a DNI list. We can decide if someone is like us or different, decent or morally reprehensible, worth a follow or a block, all without ever exchanging a word. We can decide whether to speak to or cut off a person so quickly now, and in doing so we may sometimes lose opportunities for growth...
When my dad was overseas in the early 2000's during W Bush's presidency, he struck up a conversation with a local. They had some beers and played pool. That local never would've talked to my dad if he'd introduced himself as U.S.American before striking up conversation, he would've dismissed him immediately.
Everyone knows that politics seem to be getting more divided every day. I think the only solution is to talk to people we know in person, and I think that's harder than ever for us for a lot of reasons.
Take a moment to think about the last time you had an argument in a comment section somewhere online. Think about the things you said to the person for a moment.
Try and remember the last time you talked like that to someone in person. Isn't it almost always easier to type insults on a screen to a pfp than to insult someone to their face? It's easier to talk about subjects you have a strong opinion on online anonymously with strangers, isn't it? Easier to insult someone's intelligence when you don't know or care who they are. Insulting a stranger online over a divisive topic has no consequences for you, but it also typically has little impact on the person you're talking to, even if it feels cathartic for you in the moment.
In real life, divisive topics are scary. I think we've become afraid of divisive and polarizing topics for a lot of reasons; Cancel culture, Covid, discomfort, etc. I think we're afraid of stepping out of our comfort zone (to a healthy, safe degree that is.) I think we're afraid of getting into an argument, afraid of losing people. That's understandable, arguments are unpleasant after all... And I think a lot of us lost contact or blocked former friends and family members during the Trump presidency. I also think a lot of our social skills in general deteriorated a bit during Covid when the internet was the only way to communicate with people.
I think we're afraid of being wrong about something, afraid of messing up, afraid of upsetting someone, of being lumped into a group or called bigoted, small-minded, disgusting, perverted, secretly racist or sexist or homophobic or antisemitic or evil... The very idea is gut-wrenching, no? Easier to avoid such a conversation altogether isn't it?
And I don't know a lot about politics or government... but I do know that we here in America can do better than Trump and Biden. I also know that my ability to affect who becomes President is probably much smaller than my ability to affect who becomes Senator, and even that is much smaller than my ability to change a friend's mind by talking to them about a divisive subject.
It's easy to say "the world is fucked" and "all politicians suck." It's hard to have hope. It's hard to get your hopes up and think you can make a difference in the face of a million dissenters who will laugh at you for trying.
I think maybe this is the way to start though. I think we discount the impact we have on the people around us, but stories and relationships are powerful things.
Have a difficult conversation this week. Ask someone their opinion on a complicated issue. Don't put yourself in danger of course, but get a little uncomfortable. That's where change starts. Humanity is made of humans, and if you know some humans, then you can change humanity. That's where real change begins.
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ratcandy · 7 months
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(Sending this in an ask so I don't spam you with four different comments on your disability post. 💀 No need to reply. Just getting this out there.)
*dumps*
I'm seriously dealing with this right now.
Working on a fic with a potentially disabled robot character. It's not explicitly stated in game, but it is implied.
As a chronically ill person, I really want to lean into it, explore it, and show that the character is loveable and awesome as a disabled person. That there's more to him than what's disabling him without minimizing the impact it has on his life. Because I would want that to be said about me.
But like. He's a robot.
There's no resources available to fix him (LITERALLY fix him. As a robot) where he's located, so his disability is plausible in-game. But if I'm exploring what happens after, where he leaves his current location, the thought of fixing him comes up. There'd probably be resources available in this other place.
I don't want to fix him. I think it would send the wrong message. But also. Not fixing him might send a wrong message too. It might put blame on him, by making it where the only thing keeping him from getting "better" is himself, you know? Implying that he would get "better" if he just let himself get better.
I would really hate for that to be the takeaway from the fic. It's a really crappy way of thinking, and I've had to face similar accusations myself.
So I'm in a bit of an uncanny valley right now.. Not sure what to do about it.
Excuse me for the ramble. I just think it's neat that you posted this when I started really focusing on the issue. Is this a sign. What does it mean for me.
Anyway. The disability removal trope in media has always rubbed me the wrong way with its harmful implications, and it's uncomfortably common. :( Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way.
Okay I'm done. Thanks.
I saw this ask, looked up from my phone in deep thought, went on a whole spiel out loud about it, and then promptly forgot it came from an ask buT I"M HERE NOW, and I wiLL reply because. I think I could maybe offer some thoughts
...And it turns out I have Many Thoughts.
I don't know this robot character you're messing with or to what extent he'd "need" repairs, but I feel there's a few easy questions to ask first before you could decide whether it's a good option for the story! Better, have him Himself grapple with these questions and allow him agency in the decision (aka: Whatever you do, don't force it on him sdhgk)
Since I don't know what disability this robot's got, let's just say he's got an arm that's totally dead. Just can't be used. But just popping it off wouldn't be easy due to the mechanics going on, and perhaps the damage goes further than just the arm.
He's already learned to adapt to how that arm sits. He's learned to balance with the weight of it, knows how to avoid bumping it into things, is totally accustomed to just using one arm.
Now, suddenly, he's in a situation with high-tech engineers who could replace that arm no problem and make it work just as it always did.
Now he's got to ask himself,
"Do I want to?" I mean, obvious question, but really. If he's totally happy with how he lives, not despite his disability but just With It, then what would necessarily be the point of going through a whole procedure? And even if he's not totally happy, but only mildly inconvenienced at best now that he's adapted, is going through with a Robot Surgery and all the struggles of adapting with a new arm worth it?
"Would I be able to adapt to having two arms again?" Depending on how long he's had his disability for, this could be amplified by a lot. If it's been almost his entire life with the disability, having another arm again would be almost totally foreign. He'd have to re-balance himself without the weight, get used to the feeling of electricity circulating on that side of him, learn how to control that arm again, go through whatever the robot equivalent of physical therapy is, and that's IF the arm replacement goes 100% right. Which is another thing...
"What's the chance that the replacement doesn't work?" Assuming he's not given a perfect solution that just will totally work no questions asked, there's always a chance it just won't work. The body may not accept a new arm, the damage may have spread too far and any replacements would have to go further than just the arm, and would he be comfortable with that? And what if it not only doesn't work, but instead makes it worse? Would jamming a new arm into a damaged socket just spread the damage further?
If you want to lean real far into the robot aspect, have an existential crisis but Ship of Theseus style, especially if there's a lot of integral parts that would need repairs. Yknow, the whole "if I replace all the parts of a ship, is it still the same ship?" but in this case, Robot.
Also, from a writer perspective... one of the reasons suddenly curing a disability is seen is Not Great is especially notable in cases where the disability was caused by an injury (as opposed to being born with it). Because then there's likely trauma attached to it. There's trauma that the person/character has had to work through, accept, and learn to move on with. And that's not easy, especially depending on the severity of the disability.
And once they've gone on that journey to live with and embrace their disability, gone through the massive life changes and mental adjustments that are required to proceed with life, suddenly providing a cure will make that journey seem... like it had moot point, kind of.
It'd be like. I dunno, say Character A's ancestor did a bad thing. And they spend the whole story grappling with that bad thing their ancestor did that they had no control over. Near the end of the story they learn to accept it, vow to be better than that ancestor, whatever. Only for the story to end by going "Surprise! That ancestor never did it at all, they were framed! Your bloodline is innocent! Hurray!"
Does that make sense? Suddenly there was no point to any of that. It damages the story As Well as having less than ideal implications.
ANd my last point ....... About the "the only thing keeping him from getting 'better' is himself, you know? Implying that he would get 'better' if he just let himself get better."
I mean... putting aside any implication that being disabled is somehow "lesser" than not being disabled, as I doubt that was your intention,
Again, it mostly depends on the extent of the disability. Is he gonna die without it being fixed? Is he in utterly horrific agony that he's screaming about the entire time while the button for a cure is in front of his face?
Because even THEN, "how will I manage when suddenly NOT disabled" is a question that's gotta be asked and addressed. It might be the totally reasonable decision to have him take a cure, but the Ramifications of sudden curing have gotta be acknowledged, especially if he's been disabled for a while.
Is he choosing to hurt for the sake of hurting, or is it due to being scared/uncertain of what a life not hurting looks like?
OR, if this disability hardly bothers him, then... like. Again. It would make sense to NOT want to go through all the steps to get it repaired if it could just cause more problems. Say it's as something as small as an annoying twitch. Like, say his hands twitch a lot, perhaps even shake. But he's used to it. It's been years and it's just part of how he is now. He doesn't necessarily care to get it fixed, because it's... just part of him. At that point, it'd just be weird to see him as "keeping himself from getting better," because he's... fine? Relatively?
I dunno. For that question I guess it mostly depends on Is He Happy Right Now/is he content with his disability already. Because yea, if he is content, like... who cares if he doesn't fix it. Even if it's more severe like the whole non-functioning arm idea I mentioned earlier. Or hell maybe he's totally paralyzed! Hasn't walked for years! Found other means of mobility and has learned to adapt to it! Is totally happy while being paralyzed! Not mentioning how complicated the ''adapting to suddenly not being disabled anymore'' becomes with something as complex as that If he doesn't mind it too much, then.......... why go through all that trouble if he's Fine, right? Who is being hurt by that?
anyway. That was a really long post. I hope my rambles??? Help you at all with that?? I mean like I said in my original post there can be totally innocent reasons to "cure" a disability in a story, it just has to be handled with care and sensitivity. Give the character some amount of agency in it!
...yknow, like. So long as you're not going down the "i'm so miserable with my disability it's either i get cured or i die" route. because . u know. I don't need to explain why that's not great hopefully sdghKSLJDGH
OK ENOUGH RAMBLING!!!!!!! this gave me many thoughts about robot disability, something I do not typically think about
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