#sophomore year is everything to me i love it so much
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Rewatching Sophomore Year and I want to rip my hair out because what do you mean Fig desperately wanted to have healthy open relationships but kept falling into toxic habits and she got possessed and her guilt fed into her insecurities and made her spiral once again. And she didn't know that her and Ayda's love was already on its way through time and space since the dawn of time.
#the lovers of all time fr i am gonna scream#sophomore year is everything to me i love it so much#fantasy high#figayda#fig faeth#ayda aguefort#fantasy high sophomore year#d20#dimension 20#yapping time
82 notes
·
View notes
Text
Finally got to the quote and wanted to draw something for it
#if anyone wants to talk about fantasy high please message me I’m on the last episode of sophomore year and I’m losing my mind#riz means everything to me#I love them all so much#d20 fhsy#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#it’s gorgug keep going#dimension 20#dimension 20 fantasy high#gorgug thistlespring
407 notes
·
View notes
Text
yes i did fanart of my own fic it's called self love (here is the fic)
Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
[ID: a digital, sketchy comic of sklonda and pok from fantasy high in four pictures. in the first, a beer glass is in the middle, and around it snippets of sklonda's thoughts. one is of her doing paperwork, another of her holding her head, another hectic one of a gun, her looking back and her terrified eye, and the last one of her face angry. in the second, sklonda is sitting at the bar and looking to the left as someone off screen says, is this seat free? on the other side of the bar are the bartender's legs and an ominous shadow extending from them. in the third, pok is leaning with one arm on the bar and looking flirtily; the hand on the bar is fidgeting, and the other is in his pocket. in panels next to it, sklonda looks him up and down with a neutral expression. in the fourth, pok smiles cutely and sklonda finally returns the smile, motioning to the barstool next to her and saying, as you can see. End ID]
#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#sklonpok#sklonda gukgak#pok gukgak#fantasy high fic#d20 fantasy high#ok ok so. welcome to like ten drawings i made of the fic while it was still a wip#i'll post them in 'parts' so theyre all separate posts for clarity and ID shortness but im connecting them w links#since they're all for the same thing#i had so so much fun playing in the sandbox#and they're v loose comics bcs it's smt im having fun w that also helps me work out my comic brain#like think in panels to a degree even if theyre real loosey goosey#the fic is a version of their first meeting#this is all v hectic since i finished it at 2 am prior to a trip but then didn't have time to set everything else up#i still haven't tagged the fic fully (it's enough to not catch anyone off guard but there's stuff to add)#gggghhhh i love themmm
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
Forgive me if I'm a bit nervous about Gorgug this season. It's just that the last Zac Oyama pc was Colin Provolone, who was arguably one of his greatest D20 performances, if not the greatest.
Zac always does great with every pc he plays, but Colin was something else. He came out swinging with actions and words that were teeming with unspoken emotional baggage. The way Colin's presence affected the other pcs; there was this level of depth that I don't think I've seen in any of his other characters. It was understated and quiet in that signature "just a guy" way that he tends to be, while still captivating everyone instantly with just how raw it was.
Not to say we haven't seen emotional depth in Gorgug. It's just that, compared to the other Bad Kids, Gorgug's journey and progression as a character has been very... impersonal? Like, yes, he found his birth parents, and he found friends who appreciate him, and he faced his insecurities about his intelligence, and he navigated relationship troubles, and his trial through the claustrophobic bug-tunnels was a horrifically-uncanny parallel to how he's spent his entire life trying to make himself as small as possible.
But how much of that has actually changed him from the Gorgug we started with? I would agree that he's definitely happier with his life, given all the loving and supportive people that have been added to it when it used to be just him and his parents. And he's certainly grown into himself and become more self-assured in his abilities, even if he's still, and always will be, our anxious little guy. And there's nothing wrong with that. I've always liked how Gorgug was a representation of all the little things. The subtle acts and kindnesses that don't seem like much to most, but to some are everything.
We don't need another Bad Kid living in fear that their mouth could be shit-in at any moment. We've already got one-too-many.
All that being said, I just feel like Gorgug's personal story beats are much easier to sweep under the rug than everyone else's. He has the same soft and understated quality that Colin held, but they lack that extra oomph that pushed Colin over the edge from being just another guy in a series of dudes, to a character that the vast majority of us could not get out of our heads. He took someone who was anxious and softspoken, who ultimately never wanted to be violent— someone who is remarkably similar to Gorgug in many ways— and maintained that demeanor and core in Colin's character while still hitting us in the feels with character development at max velocity at every turn.
I think Zac gets better and better at this with every season that goes by. With each new character, there is always something that leaves me stunned in awe. And it's been, what, three? Four years since we last saw Gorgug?
I'm just,,, I'm cautiously optimistic but also going into a bit of a worry about what violence this man may inflict upon us
#i got SO carried away LMAO#i dont think ive ever written any posts about gorgug specifically#i made a lot about colin. and some about pib. and some more about zacs performances in general.#but never anything gorgug-focused. i just wasnt on tumblr at those other times that hed been on my mind like this#you can tell i still couldnt resist talking about colin lol#he was just so fucking good. a fantastic character all around. i cant imagine a better example to get my point across than him#when i do posts like this its all very much just me taking a vague idea and working with whatever comes out in the moment#so when i tell you i very much did not plan to get lost in the counterargument and had to stop for a second to remember what my point was#my point still stands but so does everything else#you dont realize it. how similar gorgug and colin really are. or how metaphorical the bug tunnel was.#or how gorgug IS the epitome of little details. small acts. quiet rights and wrongs. the faint causes and the even subtler effects.#u dont truly realize it until youre writing it yourself in a free flow fugue state and it all comes to a halt cuz youve blown your own mind#anyway i love gorgug and i love zac pcs and i hope this post makes sense cuz finding the right words was fucking hard hah#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fantasy high sophomore year#fhsy#gorgug thistlespring#the ravening war#trw#colin provolone#zac oyama
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
i seriously need to get a new job and start making money again asap bc i cannot keep living at home much longer it’s driving me insane
(wrote an entire essay in the tags without meaning to oops)
#i feel so isolated from everything bc i’m not in school rn but all my friends are and 90% of the ones who are in state go to the same school#so they’re all in the same town and here i am 45 minutes away#i never get invited to anything bc 1) my friends all tend to make plans really last minute#and 2) if we want to go out and drink - which we usually do bc that’s the stage of life we’re in rn - i’d have to stay the night with#someone bc i absolutely cannot afford a 45 minute uber home and most of my friends don’t like staying over / having people stay over#so i have basically no social life and it’s only gotten worse in the past couple months since i got laid off from my main job#not only did i love that job but i loved my coworkers and work was pretty much the only time i left the house and interacted with people#and without that job i can’t even do the little solo things i used to do to cheer myself up like go see a movie#or even just go for a long drive bc i’m broke (as in i have $17 in cash to my name and am like $1000 in debt rn)#so all i do is rot in bed all day and apply for jobs that i’m overqualified for yet still don’t get hired#i barely even leave my room bc i avoid my family which just makes me feel guilty bc i love my family#but they get on my nerves so easily and most of the conversations i have with my mom end in her lecturing me about something and me crying#and on top of everything it’s just straight up embarrassing to be unemployed and completely directionless about college and living at home#logically i know i’m still very young and it’s common to live at home when you’re 20 but literally none of my friends do#i had a couple friends who lived at home for the first 2 years after high school and went to community college but by now they’ve moved out#and they’re all at universities and either graduating this year or next year meanwhile the earliest i could possibly graduate is in 2 years#i should be finishing my junior year rn but i’ve only completed my freshman year#i hated the school i was at and planned on transferring sophomore year but long story short that didn’t work out#even longer story short i ended up doing a semester each at 2 different community colleges and failed all my classes both times#and took 2 semesters off so now i’m a full 2 years behind and even though my freshman year was miserable#i’m starting to wish i stayed at that school anyway bc at least i would be at a university and accomplishing something#plus theres a huge difference between staying at home for a couple years after high school then moving out later#vs living on your own right away then having to move back home after you’ve already experienced having your own space#and on top of everything i have an older sister who’s a literal genius and graduated last year#and a younger sister who just finished her freshman year at the school i hated but she loves it and got perfect grades and made friends#so they’re both thriving and here i am living with my mom and my 13 year old brother and just completely failing at everything#i’m just so miserable and obviously moving out again and going back to school wouldn’t magically fix everything#but at least i would feel like my life was going somewhere and i wasn’t getting left behind by everyone i know#i just have no idea how to move forward and i feel like ever since high school not a single thing has gone the way i wanted it to#vent
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
no bc why did a single dm from my ex-situationship/crush sent me spiraling for DAYS. why would he do that?! what possesses a man to do such a thing?!! what does he want from me?!??
#caroline speaks#like if he liked me all along… that completely changes everything about that situation#and it like. v much makes me the problem LMFAO#but last i heard he still had a gf#so is it weirder if he has a gf and is sliding up on me (his sophomore year crush)#or is it weirder if they broke up and he’s hitting me up despite the fact that we don’t live in the same city#like which is worse??? genuinely idk#everyone i asked is just like ‘guys r dumb’#but there’s no way. NO WAY. he did not consider the implications of that dm#love life
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
brennan lee mulligan 24/7: you see, they look at you and they go: “(the deepest, most agonizing, beautiful piece of dialogue you have ever had the pleasure of allowing to grace your eardrums during some really deep lore heavy character development, effectively attaching you to a character that you thought you were already attached to so innately that you thought it was impossible to deepen that bond).”
#fantasy high sophomore year FUCKED me up bro#i’m on the last ep#but it’s 3am and it’s 5 hours long#it’s definitely a tomorrow activity#but i can’t sleep thinking about them#how aelwyn was just a different product of circumstance#how riz’s dad heard everything he said at the grave#how fabian’s becoming his own man and he’s brilliant#how gorgug loves so fiercely and is actually much smarter than he gives himself credit for#how fig is allowing herself to fall in love not just with ayda but with the real version of herself#how kristen gave a voice to something thought to be completely gone and found her power in that#pure unadulterated lesbianism#OH and ARO/ACE REP WITH RIZ#i have cried six times today over this silly little dnd show
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Also the fact that the Thistlesprings and Jawbone are both parents by CHOICE. They choose to be loving and caring and supportive, and they choose that over and over again. They choose Gorgug and Adaine and the Bad Kids over and over. They don't do what they do out of obligation, but out of LOVE.
The Thistlesprings and Jawbone are actually so important to Fantay High I cannot over emphasize it. It's a story about how the adults we trust will fail us. Our church leaders, our teachers. Our parents. But characters like Jawbone and the Thistlesprings and even Sklonda and Gorthalax. They shift the theme. Now it's about how the adults in your life are meant to nurture you. They're meant to love you and encourage you and be proud of you. Bad parents aren't a given. This is what they're supposed to be like.
#i love Jawbone so much#just a character who means everything to me#being a family is a choice and they all choose each other over and over#dimension 20#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year
782 notes
·
View notes
Text
︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ fuck buddy loser!ellie ໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა
fuck buddy loser!ellie who you met in ur sophomore year of college through dina, your roomate. immediately taking interest in her appearance despite the way she carried herself.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who pretended to dislike "your people", always partying, big friend groups, everything she disliked.... but deep down, you were exactly what she wanted.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who has an insanely high sex drive when she's around you.. sex wasn't something she ever thought about actually doing until you met... but from that day on it was all she could think about.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who is disgusting the first time you two are together. it's was as if she had been strived of physical touch for so long she didn't know how to behave, she had craved your body for so long — and it was exactly how she dreamed.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who loves to eat you out, she refuses to do anything beforehand. she gets wet off on the way you grip her hair and arch your back while her fingers pump in and out of you as her tongue sucks on your clit. she swears she can cum just at the sight of you looking down at her, whining out her name for more as she slows her pace in an attempt to tease you.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who is a sub most of the time, and always has to deal with your harsh responses to her teasing. she loves when you're in control and tell her how to get you off, but it kills her when you won't let her touch you. she'll watch you closely as you touch yourself, smacking away her hand anytime she gets close. "please baby..... j-hust wanna make you feel good" she'll beg, and you'll ignore her until you think she's been good enough.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who masturbates to your photos whenever you're apart. one night you tried to get her to go out and party with you, but she refused. a few hours later you send her a video of you i dressing in the bathroom, showing her what she missed out on by being a loser and staying home..
fuck buddy loser!ellie who will fuck you anywhere. she's so needy it's pathetic.. whether it's in her car, the bathroom, the locker room, she doesn't care if it's "risky" — she just needs to feel you.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who loves scissoring, and she's so vocal about it, especially when you're on top. "fuck .. speed u-up please" she'd be such a mess, desperately trying to grind herself into you — sucking on your boobs as you leaned down over her to steady your speed.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who squirts every time you finger her or use the double sided dildo with her. she's so beyond sensitive it's impossible for her to control herself — though you've vocalized finding it hot in the past. not to mention how much of a mess she is when you overstimulate her... you know her body better than she does, touching her in ways that send her over the edge.. "come on els .. can't you give me one more" you'd mock her for a third time as she cries at your words, crumbling underneath you multiple times in a single night.
fuck buddy loser!ellie who calls you pet names often, especially "my girl". you both swear there's no attachments, but in reality she has such a bad crush on you. it feels stupid on her end to have such a silly crush on someone she's fucked a million times... but when you're not having sex, she's so shy around you and blushes like crazy ... even though behind closed doors you were practically consuming eachother, she was to scared to tell you her real feelings out of fear of ruining things.
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#deep abiding disquiet#four days left of high school (!)#and still two ap tests to go (woefully unprepared) plus cs and english projects#and maybe part of what’s disquieting is my conviction that there’s no work at the end of senior year fighting with the fact that there is#and maybe it’s anxiety about college (did i choose the right place etc)#i’m sure both of those play a part#but i think mostly i don’t want to go#i’ve loved it here. i’ve screamed and cried and hated everything and had terrible times but throughout it all i’ve loved it here#i don’t want to go#i was happy to leave my elementary school and thrilled to leave my middle school. so even though it’s my third school i’m so unprepared#i’ve never had to leave somewhere i liked#most of my friends are my grade they’re coming with me to college (in a figurative sense; only one actually is)#but one of my sophomore friends doesn’t really have friends other than us. and i don’t want to leave him alone#things are so hard for him already#and i don’t want to leave my computer science teacher behind#he’s been so much more to me than just a cs teacher#though he’s a great one#he taught me i could enjoy actually learning cs/coding instead of thinking it’s cool but hating the action itself#i have him to thank for any success in calc 2 this year#he encouraged my interest in philosophy and has been endlessly willing to answer my aristotle questions#he holds himself to true catholic values and so helped me forgive the grudge i held against catholicism after middle school#and (though i’m lutheran if i’m anything) through that started me down my own path of seeking god#he’s provided guidance and reassurance so often over the past two years#in him i saw an adult able to juggle stem (math/cs) and humanities (philosophy/theology) which i didn’t know could be done#i saw an adult who has friends which i didn’t know could be done#what he’ll readily confess to when discussing philosophy is this belief that love is central to everything#theres a hopeful and beautiful world he’s revealed to me through that. i don’t want to go
0 notes
Note
#20 from the jealousy, jealousy prompt list with steve pls 🫶🏼
steve doesn't realize he's in love with you until he gets a glimpse of you with someone else (fwb to lovers, fluff, 1.2k)
Steve Harrington spent the entire summer thinking he was the only one who thought your Scoops Ahoy uniform was way hotter than should be allowed.
The thigh-high socks. The short skirt. The pretty ascot tied around your neck. It was a diabolical concoction. And, yeah, sure, the sailor theme was an acquired taste, but Steve has always been a firm believer that you could wear anything and make him fall to his knees. He’d worship you like a goddess in a goddamn parka, he’s that far gone for you.
The only problem is he thought he was the only one.
He loved you so much that everything else just became white noise. There was never any room for anyone else to love you ‘cause he adored you the most. Or he thought so, at least — until a pretty boy with circle glasses and a chiseled jawline talked you up at the front counter. For ten fucking minutes straight.
He watches the stranger cross the threshold of Scoops, with a sundae in his hand and a dumb smile on his stupid face. “Who was the guy?” Steve blurts from the opened partition the second he’s gone. He folds his golden arms over the countertop, biceps threatening to burst from the navy sleeves of his uniform.
“A friend,” you answer casually as you sort change in the register.
His fluffy brows pinch then relax a moment later. He pouts at the vague response because he can’t handle not knowing. “Seems like you two are real close,” he lilts, trying hopelessly to play it cool.
“We are, actually,” you tell him. You drop the remaining quarters into their designated section and flash him a pretty look over your shoulder. “I’ve known him since I was a teenager— sophomore year, I think?”
Steve nods slowly, feigning interest. “Ah. High school sweethearts, then?”
You slide the opened register closed with your hip. It clunks shut behind you as you spin around to face him. You walk the short distance to the back counter, skirt swishing around your thighs as you go. Steve tries hard not to pull away when you lean in towards him, choosing to bask in your unwavering stare and intoxicating perfume instead.
“You should watch what you say, Harrington,” you caution lowly. “I’m gonna start to think you’re jealous.”
He scoffs. “I am not jealous.”
“No?”
“No! No way,” he answers, too quickly to be convincing. “We’re— We said we were gonna do the whole unlabelled thing, so… That’s what we’re doing.”
You nod once. “Great,” you hum with a tightlipped smile, spinning away once more.
The door to the breakroom squeaks open a moment later. Steve lingers in the entryway, shifting on his feet like a nervous child in a sailor’s uniform. Crossing his arms over his chest, he peers at you through his lashes.
“But it wouldn’t be, like, the worst thing in the world if I said I wanted to be the only one who, you know, looks into your eyes, and… holds your hands, and… hears you laugh…” he wonders lowly, scrunching the bridge of his nose. “Right?”
You don’t realize how big you’re smiling when you look back at him. “No,” you shrug, all cool despite your skipping heart. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing.”
“Good,” Steve grins.
The small of your back digs into the counter’s edge when you turn to face him. You meet his pretty face with a sheepish one. “But it does go against everything we talked about it.”
The boy shrugs. “Well, then, screw it,” he blurts.
“What?”
“I take it back.”
You laugh before you mean to. The golden sound echoes through the empty store. “That quickly?”
“Hush,” he pouts.
“It took me talking to some guy — who might as well be a stranger to me now, by the way — to change your mind about wanting to date me?” you elaborate with narrowed eyes.
Steve cowers under your stare. “…Kinda. Yeah.”
“So, what?” you scoff. “We’re boyfriend-girlfriend now?”
“If you wanna be.”
You grin up at him while he approaches you, all slow like he’s stalking prey — only you don’t entirely mind being hunted. “Pretty soon, we’ll be playing house if we’re not careful,” you joke, smoothing your palms up his torso.
A crooked grin blossoms on his pink mouth at the thought. “That doesn’t sound like a bad idea, actually,” he mumbles lowly.
“Steve…” you huff.
He laughs and cradles your jaw between softly calloused palms. “What?” he hums as he ducks down to kiss you. Your lips lock in a fleeting kiss — an innocuous spearmint-strawberry-chapstick concoction.
You let him kiss you, but your pout never wavers. “You can’t just say something like that and expect me to move on,” you murmur.
“I like you?” he shrugs. “So what?”
“So what?” you parrot with a laugh. “We’re not kids anymore, you know? Relationships are pretty serious now, Steve.”
“It doesn’t have to be.”
You meet his doe-eyed look with a sterner glare. “That’s the problem. That’s why we agreed to keep things lowkey. ‘Cause you can’t be serious about anything.”
“I can’t be serious about some things,” Steve insists with a boyish twist to his scruffy features. You arch your brow to egg him on. “Well, you, for starters— I haven’t even looked at anyone since I started seeing you, so… That’s gotta be a start, right?”
Your brows scrunch softly together. You don’t mean to look as shocked as you do, but you can’t help it. “You haven’t?”
“No,” he answers, chiseled features swirled like he’s tasted something sour. The thought never even crossed his mind despite distinctly keeping your relationship (or lack thereof, maybe) completely casual. “Have you?”
“No! I just… I thought that maybe you were, you know, keeping your options open or whatever.”
“So that means you’re not canoodling with Mister Jawline, right?” he jokes with a hopeful glint in his honeyed gaze.
You roll your eyes but decide to humor him anyway. “No, Steve,” you deadpan.
He grins, prettier than should be allowed. “Good.”
You squint up at him. “Which means you’re not canoodling with Miss Redhead-Nice-Boobs, who comes in every week just to talk to you. Right?”
Steve’s brows furrow. His dark eyes flit between both of yours as he tries to figure out who exactly you’re referring to. “Who?” he wonders with a cartoonish lilt to his voice.
You’re pout deepens ‘cause you don’t know what he’s playing at. Her name’s Cherry — which you think is pretty easy to remember, considering her fiery auburn curls and ruby red lipstick. She’s tall and lean and effortlessly beautiful. Too pretty to be jealous of. You can’t help but admire her.
So Steve’s confusion is equally dumbfounding.
“You do like me, don’t you?” you murmur with a suspicious squint.
He laughs. “Does that surprise you?”
“A little bit. Yeah.”
His nose scrunches. “Still wanna be boyfriend-girlfriend with me, though?”
You purse your lips to the side and pretend to ponder the question “Sure,” you shrug after a few moments, rising to the tips of your toes to smack a quick kiss to his mouth.
You greet a group of customers a second later, while Steve restocks the tubs of ice cream. Totally casual. Not at all lovesick.
Well… maybe a little.
#published by bug#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y/n#stranger things imagine#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington#stranger things#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things fanfic#stranger things fic#steve harrington fanfiction#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fanfic#st drabbles#stevie drabble
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
a sinner i am
If its so wrong, why does it feel so good?
trope: Boyfriend's Dad PP character: Joel Miller x f reader summary: Your boyfriend Shawn Miller and his dad Joel bring you along to Hawaii for Christmas vacation. Things don't go as planned.
warning: 10/10 on the sexual tension scale, slowishh burn, kissing, grinding, cheating on your bf (but it’s cool, cuz its with Joel and everything is fictional in this universe), alternative universe b/c daddy miller stays alive and hates golf and he has a son named Shawn, no Sarah. rating: E
words 6.8k
wanna see my other stuff?
part i : takeoff
The best things in life are the people we love, the places we’ve been, and all the memories we’ve made along the way. - author unknown
"Loving him is a sin; of that I'm fully aware. But a sinner I am." - Bella Jewel
Your boyfriend Shawn brings over two iced coffees as the two of you work on a crossword together at your local coffee shop. You have been filling in the squares quickly.
"Thanks babe," you say warmly as you take the coffee from him. He presses a kiss to your temple, taking a seat next to you.
"Damn, you're fast this mornin'," he says when he sees all you've filled in. It's a tradition for the two of you; weekend crosswords over coffee. It's nice. It's domestic.
It's a little boring.
You're college sweethearts who met your sophomore year and have been inseparable since. And while the love is still very much there the butterflies have unfortunately been hibernating for a while.
It's normal, you tell yourself when you sometimes zone out during sex. It's normal when you've been together with someone so long.
"It's so nice to be doing this instead of college essays," you say.
"Fuck yeah it is."
This is your first summer of freedom without the threat of schoolwork looming in the near distance. Shawn is starting his master's in the fall and you've just accepted a position at the local museum.
“Just think I’ll actually be able to enjoy Christmas this year,” you tease. “Unlike someone who’ll be working on essays.”
“Hey now,” Shawn says with mock offence. “I’ll be able to enjoy my Christmas just fine. Actually, my dad wants to celebrate Christmas somewhere warm this year. He's talkin' about some resort in Hawaii."
Shawn comes from money, the son of the infamous Joel Miller of The Miller Company, the premiere construction firm in Texas. This means expensive vacations, nice cars, all of that is normal for him. You meanwhile have had to work hard for everything you have.
Being left behind at Christmas seems strangely unkind for the normally thoughtful head of the Miller family. Shawn's dad has always treated you like one of the family so this news is unexpected.
"Have a great time," you say trying not to be jealous. "Bring me back some chocolate macadamia nuts."
You can admit that even though both Shawn and his father are humble, kind men, you're always a bit bitter that they live so nicely. Leaving you out of their holiday vacation seems especially unkind.
"He's taking both of us babe," Shawn says with a grin. "You think he's gonna leave you behind on Christmas? After you’ve spent the last six with us?"
Christmas in Hawaii? Is this a dream? Your pencil lays forgotten on the table as you gape open-jawed at your boyfriend.
"Are you serious?"
"Babe," Shawn says meaningfully. "My dad likes you better than he likes me. Of course you're invited."
You've always gotten along with Joel. It's impossible not to. He's friendly, funny and charming. There's a reason he's good at his job. And you're a good girl, a kind girlfriend to his son with clear career ambitions.
A smile breaks out over your features and you pull Shawn into a tight hug. He chuckles, embracing you back, kissing your cheek.
"Make sure you don’t overpack, okay?" He murmurs in your ear as you giggle. “I don’t feel like helping you haul six bags of shoes for a week-long trip.”
Thoughts of lounging by the pool with a drink in one hand and a magazine in the other while the Hawaiian sun beats down on you is all too enticing. You kiss him fiercely, imagining the time together.
"I can't wait."
The two of you finish the crossword puzzle all the while talking about the drinks and food and the excursions you'll both take.
"Maybe once I've got a handle on school we can think about findin' an apartment in the new year," Shawn broaches, his hand over yours.
Sex fades, but this? This domestic stuff you have with Shawn? That's special. That's love.
“Yeah, I’d love that.”
He gives you a smile, that dimple poking out of his cheek that makes you swoon.
"Ready to go?" Shawn asks, extending his hand to you when your coffees are drained.
"Yeah," you say with your hand taking his. "Let's go."
When December twentieth announces itself with a thunderstorm you couldn’t care less because you’re at the airport. Your large rolling bag bag is stuffed with cute outfits, swimsuits and even some snorkelling gear.
"Feels like you got a dead body in here," Shawn laughs as he struggles with the two bags, handing you yours before swinging an arm around your shoulders.
"I wanted to be prepared."
"Let's go my little Girl Scout," he laughs with a gentle kiss to your temple. You both check in and then find your boarding gate.
"I'm gonna grab breakfast, you want anything?" Shawn asks as he parks you and the suitcases by the gate full of noisy travellers.
"Nah, I'm good."
Shawn jogs off in the direction of a Starbucks you passed on your way in.
Out the larger windows you can see planes taking off. You've never flown before; you thought that you'd be excited. But at the first view of those planes out the window you feel your stomach drop.
They’re so big and bulky. How does it fly properly? It couldn’t. What if people shift around too much in their seats? Surely this can’t be a safe form of travel!
You pull out your phone, distracting yourself with a game. You try for several moments but your eyes keep being drawn to the huge planes outside. You grimace, wondering if you should have gotten your doctor to prescribe you something for anxiety.
"Cheer up," a voice says. "You look like you're goin' to prison, not a five star resort."
You glance over to see Shawn's dad, Joel, at the other side of you, an amused look on his handsome face. He's wearing jeans and a faded grey Longhorns t-shirt. You're momentarily thrown as normally you see him in dress pants and button downs for work.
"I'm excited for the resort, just not the giant metal death box hurling through the air that is my only means of getting there."
"Touche."
Shawn jokes about Joel liking you better then he likes him, but the truth is you and Joel are very similar. Your senses of humour, your ability to read people, your tendency to see the worst in people before they prove themselves worthy.
Shawn is more like his mom, sweet and naive at times, always seeing the good in people. It's ironic considering which parent stuck around to raise him and which one escaped the country six years after Shawn was born.
Joel takes the empty seat next to you, his kneecap kissing yours as he pulls out his phone.
"Never flown before," you explain.
"Ah, I see," Joel puts his phone in his pocket, his attention fully fixed on your face. "Well what if I told you it's actually the safest way to travel?"
"I'd call you a liar."
Joel chuckles richly, his hand falling to your knee and squeezing as he laughs.
"I promise you, I wouldn't take you on anything unsafe. And if all that's not good enough, you'll have Shawn beside you holding your hand the whole time."
You grin at that, nodding. The thought of Shawn being there does help your anxiety. Joel smiles back, eyes crinkling in the corners.
"Thank you so much for inviting me along in this trip, Joel. I've always wanted to go to Hawaii."
"S'a beautiful place," Joel nods. "And you don't need to thank me. You're practically family at this point."
Shawn returns with a muffin and two coffees in hand.
"Hey dad, got you a coffee," Shawn says handing it to his father.
"Thanks," Joel says gratefully. Just then the intercom alert sounds
"Good afternoon passengers.This is the announcement for flight 82B for Oahu, Hawaii. We are now inviting passengers to begin boarding. Please have your boarding pass and identification ready. Thank you.”
“That’s us.”
The lineup goes uncomfortably fast. You stand beside Sean who is talking to Joel behind you, the two of them deep in conversation about football, a subject you couldn't care less about. You are still too preoccupied with the flight, being surrounded by almost all strangers sailing through the sky.
You're not a fan of heights. So when you get to the door of the plane you hesitate, willing your foot to move. When it doesn't and the flight attendants shoot you a confused look, you feel yourself start to panic.
Shawn has gone on ahead to grab your seats and place your carry-on bag in the overhead bin, not noticing that you're not behind him. A large hand flies to the small of your back, a comforting gesture. Joel. He rubs there, soothing you.
"You'll be okay darlin'," he rumbles in your ear. "Remember, it’s safer than drivin' a car."
“Liar.”
Joel’s deep chuckle makes you grin and you allow Joel to gently prod you onto the plane, shooting the waiting attendants grateful looks for their patience. He takes his seat near the front, watching as you make your way to your seat next to Shawn. As you buckle in a thought occurs to you and you move your voice to a whisper.
"Isn't it gonna be kinda weird with us being there all week with just your dad? I mean, sharing the place and all?"
"Nah, he made sure the rooms were far apart. Plus, he invited his girlfriend to come along so I doubt we'll see much of him."
Joel is a chronic workaholic, often pulling late nights and working on his phone. You’ve seen him out and about with beautiful women at the events Shawn takes you to but never formally dating them. You always assumed to be a lifelong bachelor. You wouldn't blame him, especially after what he's been through with Shawn's mother.
"I didn't know he had a girlfriend," you say honestly. "Good for him."
"A couple months now," your boyfriend tells you. "You know my dad, mister private. But he took me to dinner and told me about her so I think he's getting serious."
"That's really sweet," you say honestly. You want nothing but the best for him.
All of a sudden the plane starts to jiggle, sending people stumbling down the aisles and others gasping in surprise. You reach over and grab Shawn's hand, trying to regulate your breathing.
"Not so tight, babe," Shawn complains before gently sliding his hand from under yours. "You scratched me with your nails."
"Sorry," you mumble, eyes closed as the jostling of the plane continues.
You tighten your seat belt before gripping the seat arms so tightly that your knuckles are white. Sean squeezes your kneecap, murmuring that everything will be okay and that you’re safe. You keep your eyes closed, trying to focus on the soothing sounds of his words.
Eventually the plane enters smooth skies and the seat belt sign is turned off. Despite this you remain keyed up, sitting stiffly as Shawn fades into a nap.
"Excuse me, Miss?"
You crack open an eye to see a beautiful redheaded flight attendant bending down towards you with a glass of what appears to be whisky in her hand. She extends it towards you and you take it confused.
"This is from the gentleman in A-1. He says to take this and you'll be relaxed for the rest of the flight."
You look up a few rows to see Joel giving you a brief wave. You thank the women before raising it towards Joel in a Cheers motion.
Drink it. Joel mouths.
Yes, sir. You mouth back complete with a stiff fake salute before tossing back the drink.
He grins at you before settling back in his seat.
The drink does the job.
"Here we are."
The cab drops the three of you in front of the beach resort. When you step out the air is fragrant with the scent of flowers. You wait while Joel checks you all in before he's back, motioning for you both to follow.
There's the main section of the resort with luxurious hotel rooms. The more secluded section contains a variety of self contained houses that dot the waterfront. Its reserved for people who have unlimited credit card limits and drive cars that cost more than your parents first home.
When you arrive to your unit, your eyes are ready to bug out of your head. It's massive, as far as vacation rentals go. When you all step into the air conditioned unit you have to take a moment to take it all in.
The beach house is beautiful with floor to ceiling windows, stunning tile floors and tasteful furniture. All of this is topped off with spectacular views of the beach outside your door.
A plate of sliced pineapple and chilled wine sits on the kitchen table, along with a note that Joel reads when he wanders over.
"Welcome note," he explains when he sees you looking at it. "I knew the owner back in trade school."
You and Shawn nod, your boyfriends hand trailing down your back gently. It's much the same as what Joel did back at the airplane, but it feels different. You trail your suitcase behind you hearing the clack of it against the stone floor as you move around the room.
"Wow."
It's all you can utter as the three of you tour the rest of the unit. There’s a simple kitchen with an expensive looking coffee machine and a brand new bag of kona coffee waiting to be used. The living room holds a table and four chairs, a few board games and a list of nearby places to visit along with the wifi code. The couch is simple, placed in front of a large television that you’re sure you won’t use.
"My bedrooms on the right," Joel tells you both. "Yours it's on the left. We're sharin’ a bathroom, sorry about that. Pretty common in these places."
Who cares about sharing a bathroom when you're in one of the most beautiful places you've ever been? Even the bathroom is beautiful with its high waterfall shower head and sleek marble. This place must have cost a fortune for the week.
Joel encourages you both to take a look at your room down the hall and you don't hesitate to take Shawn's hand, dragging him there. Shawn pushes open the door to the bedroom and you can't hold in your shriek.
"Holy shit! It's gorgeous!"
The big windows overlook the ocean, the late afternoon beach beckoning to you. The bed is large and plush with white sheets, and framed prints of Oahu sunsets. Its spacious, the bed so large it looks like two giant beds pushed together. The closet is spacious and boats dozens of wood coat hangers.
“Wood, because it’s classy,” you tell Shawn in amusement who is already unpacking his suitcase while you continue to stare in a daze.
"You like it?"
Joel is standing at the door frame, a shoulder balanced against it, watching you take it all in. He's smiling at you in that gentle, sweet way of his that makes you feel cared for.
You're suddenly overcome with gratitude and you streak over to him.
"Thank you, Joel!" You say, throwing your arms around his neck and hugging him. "This is the most beautiful place I've ever been."
Joel laughs along with Shawn at your embrace and enthusiasm, holding you around the middle and hoisting you in his arms. Your face presses into his neck as he squeezes you, and the scent of leather and sandalwood envelops you.
You've never really hugged Joel before. Maybe a polite side hug during family events, a high-five during baseball games and even once a hard push to his shoulder when he made fun of you for being afraid of a spider that had gotten into the house.
But you've never had your front pressed to his, never really felt the muscles of his back and arms, seen the tendons in his neck or realized just how big his hands are when they squeeze your waist before lowering you.
"I guess that means you like it," he says, red-faced. You pull back, embarrassed at your overzealous response.
Shawn and his dad are very similar in their looks. Except Shawn is clean-shaven while Joel has a beard and Shawn's eyes are hazel like his mom's while Joel's are the darkest brown you've ever seen. You've never really noticed how dark until this very moment.
You shoot him a cheery thank you again before smiling and skipping over to Shawn announcing that you'll unpack as well.
"You two enjoy, I gotta make a few calls but then we can head out to dinner."
"Sounds great," Shawn says as he searches for his phone charger.
Joel closes the door behind him and you turn to your boyfriend. You can't explain it but you feel turned on. The Hawaiian air must be doing something to you because
You crawl towards where he kneels unpacking. You grin, feeling the pulse of desire hitting you below the navel. You kneel beside him, dropping your voice to a husky murmur.
"Should we break the bed in?"
An hour later the three of you are sitting at a local eatery. Joel and Shawn are talking with one another while you scan the busy restaurant.
Couples, families, all laughing and cheerful. And why wouldn't they? This is Paradise after all. But you don't feel anything like it, if anything, you feel like a little black rain cloud.
Shawn turned down your earlier advances, citing that he was too tired. The problem is for the past three months Shawn has been too tired most of the time. At first he blamed grad school but when you pointed out he still made lots of time for gaming with best friends Brian and Kevin he'd been quick to explain that gaming relaxed him.
That conversation had gone over about as well as a turd in the punch bowl. You remember being so hurt at what you felt was a slight against you. Weren't you relaxing? Weren't you something that made him happy?
So yeah, you had hoped that this little vacation might stir some of that old spark back. But maybe you were too eager. You had just arrived at the place after all. Maybe you were being unfair. Still, the rejection stung.
"Thought we could do all the tourist-y shit while we're here," Joel says after you've all placed your orders. "Luau, sunset cruise."
"Snorkelling?" Shawn offers.
"Hell yes," Joel nods grinning. "ATV tour too."
The Millers like to have fun. They also like to keep busy. It's like second nature to them to be off on adventures or activities. You meanwhile plan on spending lots of time by the pool or the beach, reading and drinking.
"What about you, darlin'?" Joel asks between sips of whisky. "What're you hopin' to do?"
You know exactly what. The thing you've been dying to do since you were a kid at the aquarium.
"I wanna swim with the turtles."
Shawn bursts into amused laughter beside you, and if you weren't already irritated with him before, you certainly are now. He grins at you not understanding that you're secretly furious with him.
"Turtles? Really?"
"What's wrong with turtles?"
"Seems kinda babyish doesn't it?"
"What's babyish about liking animals?" Joel cuts in. "You forgetting about the time we wouldn't let you in the petting zoo and you threw your shoe at me?"
"I was five, dad."
"Yeah well, some things don't change," Joel says with a smirk. "Still throwin' tantrums when you don't get your way."
"Fuck off old man," Shawn says through chuckles. “Don’t forget I’m your only child. I pick which retirement home I’m gonna stick you in when your mind goes.”
“Little bastard,” Joel mutters, trying to hold back a loud laugh.
He settles for tossing a drink umbrella in Shawn’s direction, chuckling when Shawn dodges it easily. You can't help but laugh along with him, your bad mood fading.
By the time dessert arrives you're all several glasses of wine in reminiscing about Shawn's last attempt at surfing.
"I've gotten better," he exclaims. “I swear.”
"Yeah well we'll see about that," Joel says paying the check. "Alright team, let's head back and get some shut eye. This old man needs it."
You roll your eyes at that. Joel isn't even fifty and even if he was he's about the best looking man his age bracket and younger. You've seen the way women stare at him, whispering, blushing when he looks their way. He is not what you’d qualify as old.
The three of you arrive back at the unit to the sound of nighttime creatures croaking and buzzing.
"Alright I'll meet you two out here tomorrow morning around nine. We can go to the excursion desk and plan the week. Sound good?"
"Sounds good, night Dad."
"Night Joel."
The three of you part ways into the opposite bedrooms. Shawn nuzzles your neck gently kissing there. He always does that when he's been drinking. You smile delightedly at this, eager to get into bed.
When the lights are off and the two of you have slipped off your clothes and under the covers you roll towards him, peppering his face with soft kisses.
"It's late, babe," he murmurs, kissing you sweetly but with finality.
"We're on vacation," you remind him, slipping your hand under his boxers.
You feel him slowly start to harden in your grip. You hear his breath hitch and you smile, knowing those sounds so intimately. You tug off your panties and slide onto his lap, preparing to ride him.
"Fuck me," you whisper, hips grinding against his. "Wanna feel your cock in me."
“Baby, no.”
Shawn pulls you off of him and you tumble into the bed next to him, feeling your cheeks grow hot with humiliation.
"My dad is right across the hall," Shawn hisses. “I don’t want him hearing us.”
Rejection never sits well with you and immediately you feel yourself growing defensive.
"You're dad is gonna be across the hall the whole week, Shawn,” you whisper angrily. “So what, we're not going to have fuck this entire trip?"
"We'll have sex," Shawn said rolling his eyes. "Just not when my dad is ten feet away sharing a fuckin' bathroom with us."
Bullshit. Another excuse to put off the intimacy that’s been dwindling for months. You push yourself from the bed, tugging on your dress from earlier. Shawn leans up on his elbows, giving you a look of concern.
"Where are you going?"
"A walk."
"I'll c---"
"No," you say sharp as a knife. "I want to go alone."
You stalk out of the house, eyes glossy with hurt and anger. That's the thing they don't tell you about relationships that have gone on so long -- both partners need to work to keep the fires going.
You make your way to the beach along the softly lit pathway. Its well after midnight and the resort is quiet; the lights dimmed or off entirely. You take a seat on a nearby rock, listening to the gentle sound of the evening waters lapping by the shore. You're very excited to go swimming tomorrow. To feel the warm sand underneath your feet.
You can hear noise coming from the far end of the resort. You remember over dinner Joel going through the resort map on his phone, letting you know what amenities they had. He had told you both about the dance club the resort had.
Shawn had immediately laughed, stating that he’d take a pass on it. Shawn hates dancing. You tried to get him to do dance lessons with you once but he wouldn't even give it a shot.
Right now it seems all you can do is focus on Sean's flaws. You know that he's a decent man, you know the treats you well, but there are these bugaboos these irritants that can't help frustrate you right now.
"Fuck it," you murmur to yourself, raising yourself from the sand and brushing it from your sundress. You follow the sound of the music, stopping in front of a door with blinking lights. A man in a blue Hawaiian shirt smiles at you when you approach.
"Aloha, may I ask your Unit number?"
"Number 4, under Miller."
The man types into his computer before nodding, opening the door for you. You step into the darkness, letting your eyes adjust to the blue lights and colourful dance floor. The speakers are playing typical vacation music with a heavy bass.
Bodies writhe on the dance floor, half naked in revealing dresses or in the men's case, unbuttoned shirts. You order a drink at the bar, taking it with you as you scout the area for a free chair. A hand on your wrist surprises you.
"Joel?"
Joel is seated at one of the small circle tables nursing what appears to be a tumbler of Scotch. He motions for you to take the free chair next to him and you do gratefully falling into it, your arm bumping his.
"What are you doin' here? Since when does Shawn dance?" He asks over the bass, grinning. He looks a bit tipsy, his neck red.
"He doesn't, I'm here alone. I needed to blow off some steam," you tell him over the music.
"Me too," he says loudly back. "Couldn't sleep. Too excited, I guess."
You nod, looking back at the dance floor wistfully. Everyone looks like they're having such a fun time, their worries and concerns far away from them as they undulate to the rhythm of the music. Joel takes another sip of his drink, watching you from the corner of his eyes.
You wish Shawn was here with you, you wish he was spinning you around on the dance floor. You wish it was like those early years where you couldn’t keep your hands off of each other.
"You and Shawn doin' okay?"
Joel's voice cuts into your confusing thoughts. You glance his way.
"Why do you ask?"
"Cuz I'm a dad," Joel. "And I've been married. And I know what tension between two people looks like."
You sigh heavily, your mind drifting to earlier. You don’t answer Joel because what would you tell him? You can’t tell your boyfriend’s dad that you’re worried his son is growing distant. You can’t tell him that your sex life has been disintegrating for the past several months. Instead you just shrug.
"You two talked about marriage?"
"What? No.”
You and Shawn have been together a long time, but you have no intention of settling down anytime soon. Sean is still doing his masters and you're loving your job at the museum.
"Good. No, not like that," Joel amends when he sees your stricken expression. "I just mean you're both so young."
"You were younger than us when you got married.”
"Yeah and look where that got me," he says with a scoff.
"Yeah, well, I think it's just been a long time and we're hitting a rough patch. Nothing we can't overcome," you add quickly. "It's just hard sometimes, you know?"
"Yeah," Joel nods. "I know."
The two of you lapse into silence, watching the twirling, shouting, laughing people swan around you. You shouldn’t be glum, you should be experiencing life!
"You wanna dance?"
His voice is low and husky in your ear. You start, surprised to see Joel inches from your face. You know he's speaking so close to you because it's so loud in here, but it doesn't stop your pulse from ticking at the shock.
"Don't really know how.”
"Shit reason. C'mon."
Joel throws back the rest of his drink and drags you onto the dance floor. You laugh as he spins you, both of you almost knocking into an older couple who are taking the dance very seriously. They shoot you both a nasty look and you and Joel have to work hard to muffle your laughter.
"You're gonna get us kicked out!"
"Nah," Joel shakes his head, spinning you again but closer to him. "I'm too charmin’."
"You think pretty highly of yourself don't you?"
Joel shrugs, laughing as the song ends. Another quick one begins and Joel looks serious.
"I'm gonna teach you some moves Shawn's mom taught me."
"Okay."
You're surprised, he doesn't really mention Shawn's mother very often.
You watch as Joel attempts to teach you some simple dance moves. You don't know if it's the stuffy club, the drinks running through your veins or the fact that you're dancing with your boyfriend's dad, but you can't really focus on the steps.
"I give up," you moan after the fifth failed attempt at a two-step.
"You ain't a quitter," Joel assures you, trying to spin you slowly so you can get your footing.
You never realized that Joel was such a good dancer. Watching him move his tall body is strangely hypnotizing, mainly because you never expected a man that broad and muscular to move so fluidly.
"Atta girl," he says proudly when you get some of the footing correct.
You smirk when you see the women nearby watching him, shooting him smiles. But his focus is on you, teaching you the moves and assuring you: it's alright darlin', we'll get you there just take your time.
You're having so much fun with him you barely realize that an hour has gone by and you can only tell when you realize the back of your neck is damp with sweat.
You're about to announce your heading back to the unit when the beat slows and many trickle off the dance floor. It's a slow song, and only the couples remain in the glowing dance floor.
You go to step off when you feel Joel spin you again, back into his arms. You smile breathlessly up at him, the two of you shiny from perspiration from the dancing and the warm crowded space.
Joel is looking at you strangely, his eyes luminous in the reflection of the twinkling club lights. When he slides a hand at your lower back and urges your hands around his neck you don't hesitate. You lace your fingers there, shifting from foot to foot.
You feel strange to be dancing with Joel. And not because he makes you feel uncomfortable, it's the opposite, actually. You feel almost too comfortable. Joel’s eyes are trailing over your face, sometimes highlighted by the flash of the DJ’s lights.
“You talked to Shawn about all that’s botherin’ you and this rough patch?” Joel asks out of nowhere.
He looks vulnerable; unlike the Joel you know who is all smiles and jokes.
“Kinda,” you say shyly, looking over his shoulder. “It’s just hard. . . We can both get pretty defensive. Plus, I wonder if I’m maybe being unfair. He’s in school and everything.”
“Uh huh, and you started that museum job didn’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“Pretty demanding job, ain’t it?”
“Yeah.”
Joel gives you a look as he rocks you both from side to side
“Can I say somethin’ you might not wanna hear?”
You nod.
“In my experience, it takes two people to make a relationship. Not one puttin’ in all the effort while the other one has his or her head in the sand.”
You nod slowly, absorbing his words. The song ends and Joel releases his hands you’re your waist before he announces he has to hit the washroom. You head to the bar for a glass of water and to wait for him.
"Hi beautiful."
An Australian man around Joel's age with a moustache is leaning against the bar next to you. His eyes are bleary and red-rimmed, his cheeks ruddy. He’s obviously very drunk. You give a forced smile before going back to wait for your water.
"Can I get you a drink?"
"No thanks," you answer quickly. "Just getting water."
"How about a dance then?"
"I'm good," you say forcing a polite smile. You’re facing away from him, eyes on the bartender hoping he notices you.
"C'mon beautiful," the man insists, eyes sliding over your chest in a very obvious way. "I'm a good dancer too. Could give you lots of lessons."
"She said no."
Joel's voice is there, having clearly come back from the bathroom. You step backwards and before you know it Joel is sliding his arm protectively around you. You glance up to see Joel's face contorted into a mask of fury. His teeth are bared like some wild animal and he grips you tightly to him.
"Sorry man," The guy says holding his hands up in surrender towards Joel. "Didn't know she was taken."
Joel sneers before leading you out of the club. The cool air is a welcome reprieve when you step outside, breathing deeply.
"That place is nothin' but perverts," Joel growls as the two of you make your way back along the beach in the direction of your unit.
"Joel, you were there," you say giggling. "That make you a pervert?"
"Ha ha."
You walk quietly along the shoreline, confused as to how you can feel this good when just an hour ago it felt like everything was falling apart. Maybe it’s the drink in your veins, maybe its Hawaii, or maybe it’s just Joel.
"Watch it--"
Joel takes your hand when you stumble over a rock in the semi darkness. You let him, not dropping it even when your walking evens out. It feels nice to walk hand in hand with him, it feels safe. He doesn't let go of your hand either as you continue along, your shoes making dual footprints in the sand.
"Thanks for in there," you say. “I hate creepy guys like that.”
"Was nothin'," he says, then he drops your hand after a moment. "Shawn would have done the same."
"No, he wouldn't have."
It slips out before you can stop yourself. Joel stops in the sand, his concern there in his face. It’s clear that what you’ve said has upset him.
"What?"
"He doesn't like confrontation, you know that," you say with a shrug. "And I like that about him."
"You do?" Joel challenges. "Really?"
"Sometimes."
Honestly you’ve never enjoyed the men who start fights for no reason, who act like cavemen when someone looks at their girlfriend. Shawn is too smart for that, too above it to engage with assholes like that. But you have to admit that there was a part of you that found Joel’s actions inside the club to be a bit attractive. Is that the word? Would you really call your boyfriend’s father attractive?
You look at him standing there, his grey t-shirt clinging to his muscles and wide shoulders, the muscular thighs in denim and you think, fuck, yeah he is attractive. You knew he wasn’t ugly, you’d just never looked at him like that. Like he was a man outside of being Shawn’s dad.
"I come from a time when you take care of what's yours." Joel runs a hand through his messy curls. "If you were mine I wouldn't let anyone talk to you the way that man did, let alone touch you."
If you were mine.
You can't understand why but you're nipples tighten under your dress at those words. The possessiveness in Joel's voice is so dark and husky. He’s looking off into the dark like he’s really upset.
"If I was yours," you murmur.
His glazed eyes move from the beach over to your face. You’re standing so close to one another and you can see his chest rising and falling quickly as he breathes. His scotch-coated breath huffs over your cheeks and you swear you’re getting drunker just inhaling it.
You must be, because why else would you be putting your hands on his shoulders. Why else would you be pressing your mouth to his? Why else would you be tracing his plush lips with your tongue and whimpering when he groans into your parted mouth?
And he must be drunk because he doesn’t pull away or hesitate. He dips his head and his hands wrap around your waist, bringing your body against him tightly. His palms slide over your skin, desperate to touch you everywhere as he tilts his head, deepening the kiss. You welcome it, going gooey in his arms, allowing him to take what he wants from you.
He’s so fucking broad, so strong, so masculine. You gasp into his mouth when he grips your ass with his big hands, pulling your hips against his, circling them as he kisses you. You feel his hardened cock through the layers of fabric, straining against the zipper of his jeans, desperate to bury itself in your slick heat.
To be desired like this feels powerful. It feels like years since Shawn wanted you like this much. It makes you lean more into Joel, desperate to keep the sensation going. His hands are sliding under your dress, up your silken thigh and you tremble.
A splash sounds nearby in the water, a fish or something startling you both and you simultaneously break apart. You both take a step back from one another in the sand, eyes wide. Joel looks completely crazed.
“The fuck—what are we doin’?” Joel whispers, the regret clear in both your faces.
You bring your trembling hands to your warm cheeks and tears immediately spring to your waterline.
What have you just done?
“Oh my fuck, no no, I don’t – I don’t know why-“
You bend at the waist, hands braced on your knees as you start to hyperventilate. Joel is pacing up and down the sand, his silhouette barely seen in the darkness of night. You can see his feet pacing back and forth. . . back and forth . . . He stops when you let out a hiccup, on the verge of throwing up.
“Honey stop,” Joel says, a hand on your back, rubbing gently along your spine. “Calm down. Calm down, its okay.”
“I don’t know why I did that,” you say, tears streaming down your face and dropping into the sand below. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”
“S’not your fault,” Joel says, his voice even and calm. It makes you feel calm. And yet, guilt still bubbles up in your lungs, making a small sob escape.
“I have to—you need to—I need to tell Shawn. Right now.”
“Hold on,” Joel says roughly, gripping you by the shoulder and urging you to stand. He peers into your face with a grim expression.
“You cannot tell Shawn anythin’.”
“I have to,” you whine.
“It’ll just hurt him,” Joel insists, nodding and hoping you’ll do the same. “It was a mistake. It was nothing, it was just the booze. We just drank too much and we were all hopped up on that asshole inside the club and we weren’t thinkin’.”
“Right,” you agree, relief sliding through every vein you possess as he lays it out for you. “That’s totally what it was. The drinking. We’re drunk.”
“Completely.”
“Okay. Good.”
You’re still shaken up by what just happened, still tipsy from the drinks. Joel runs an anxious hand through his curls, looking utterly wrecked.
“Let’s go back.”
The two of you walk the rest of the way back in silence. You still cannot believe what you did. You kissed your boyfriend’s father. You kissed him and he kissed you back. Fuck, you both must be utterly wasted. Maybe if you’re lucky you’ll both forget it even happened. You would welcome the hangover from hell if it could erase the last fifteen minutes from both your minds for good.
Joel tugs open the sliding glass door, not able to look at you as you both pad towards the opposing doors. You glance over your shoulder to see Joel staring at you as you enter the bedroom where his son sleeps. You give him a sorrowful smile before closing the door.
You crawl under the covers, thankful that Shawn is asleep. You slip off the dress, your hair wild from dancing, your skin sticky with sweat, and your mouth still tasting of scotch. Your cunt flutters at the memory of the noises he made.
You roll onto your side, trying to drift to sleep. Shawn, still half-slumbering snuggles up against your back. His arm slips over your waist and he holds you, as he often holds you back home, gentle and tender and full of love.
“I’m sorry about before, babe,” he murmurs into your hair.
You feel tears burning the back of your eyes. You blink rapidly, closing your eyes and trying to swallow the guilt.
You know that Joel is in his bed right now similarly afflicted, thinking about how he did something so unforgivable and to his own son. Joel is the kindest dad you know; he loves his son more than anything. You know that what you both just did was awful and disgusting.
You also know that there is something deeply wrong with you because as you lay there in Shawn’s arms your pussy floods with memories of his father’s mouth on yours still vivid in your mind.
do you guys want more of this? or should it be a one-shot? also trying a new aesthetic what do we tthink?
#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal#joel x reader#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel x oc#joel the last of us#tlou joel#joel miller x original character#au joel miller#bdf!joel#but the dbf stands for boyfriend's dad#joel miller x you
923 notes
·
View notes
Text
eddie munson x shy fem reader
warnings: reader is a bit insecure, little sprinkle of jealous eddie, reader wears glasses, smooching, also the finest cheese in all the land (i hope) <3
part two | part four
let’s go, don’t wait masterlist
word count: 2.5k
a/n: this ended up bit longer than i intended so oops. but big thanks to @strangerstilinski for brainstorming some ideas with me to further cheesify the kissing scene. and another HUGE thank you to @undead-supernova for helping me with fix some things and for looking this over. I LOVE YOU BOTH <3
“What do you mean you didn’t kiss him?!”
You quickly turn to give Nancy a pointed glare before digging deeper into your locker to retrieve your biology textbook.
But really, it is a valid question.
“I— just,” you blow out an exasperated breath. “I panicked, alright? Trust me, I’m just as disappointed as you are.”
While your date didn’t end on a bad note by any means, it definitely ended on a lame one.
When Eddie dropped you off at home after the two of you spent way too much time cozying up in a corner booth at Benny’s— you weren’t entirely ready to say goodnight to him yet.
But when he walked you to your front door and carefully started to lean in, those pesky nerves got the best of you. Instead, you pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek before he had the chance to reach your lips.
Feelings of disappointment clawed at your insides once your lips brushed against the stubble on his cheek instead of his lips, your tinted chapstick leaving a tinge of pink in its wake.
Eddie cleared his throat, carefully rubbing the back of his neck while he bid you goodnight.
You’d barely shut the door behind you when your smile faltered and all those feelings of self doubt you’d managed to push aside all night came creeping back in.
Everything was going so well, why couldn’t you just kiss him? It wasn’t as if you’d never kissed someone before.
Your first kiss happened your sophomore year, with band geek Ray Howard in King Steve’s coat closet during a stupid game of 7 minutes in heaven that neither of you enjoyed.
If you were brave enough to do that, why couldn’t you kiss the guy you actually liked?
“Well, when are you gonna see him again?” Nancy prompts. You shrug once you slam your locker shut.
“I don’t know… I’m afraid he’s not gonna want another date. I mean, I gave him a peck on the cheek! How lame is that.”
You hug your textbooks to your chest as you head to class with Nancy, who is desperately trying to convince you that Eddie would be insane if he didn’t want to see you again.
You just hoped she was right.
When you don’t see him at lunch, you instantly deflate a little. The doom and gloom that lingers outside the school now mirrors your mood, taking any semblance of your appetite with it. You hadn’t seen him all day, so that only seemed to confirm your worries.
He’s avoiding you. What else could it be?
It’s not like him to skip out on lunch, so instead of heading further into the cafeteria you turn heel to head toward the library—
And almost collide directly into Eddie.
His leather clad arms instantly wrap around you, a teasing smirk playing on his full lips. Lips you so desperately want to feel pressed against your own.
“Sweetheart, we really gotta stop meeting like this,” he teases, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “One of these days you’ll take both of us out.”
You let out a nervous giggle and an apology, relief filling your chest as his smile grows wider in response. Damn Nancy for always being right.
“Where are you headed in such a rush anyway?” he asks, finally letting you go, much to your dismay.
“Uh… the library. Wasn’t feeling super hungry.”
He nods, leaning his shoulder against the door frame. He looks even prettier than when you saw him on Friday. His curls are a little more unruly, his stubble more pronounced.
And when you catch the faintest hint of cigarette smoke lingering on his jacket and how it mixes with his spicy cologne— it has your heart stuttering in your chest.
“Well, anyway, I was wondering…”
A small grunt leaves his lips as his body is forced forward, directly into yours. The jock that just shoulder checked him mutters a “watch it, freaks” under his breath before continuing past you into the cafeteria.
The shove has closed the remaining distance between you, your faces merely inches apart now. Your palms rest against his chest, feeling how his breath slightly quickens beneath your fingertips. You could so easily kiss him like this, all you have to do is tilt your head up…
But you choke, eyes darting back down nervously toward your feet when you take a small step back.
“Are you alright?” you ask, meeting his eyes once more.
Eddie doesn’t even seem phased by what just occurred, his warm eyes entirely still focused on you.
“Oh, that’s nothing, sweetheart,” he chuckles, “I can handle myself.”
Eddie motions to his torso, lifting the lapels of his jacket as if to prove his point.
“See? Not even a scratch.”
And it takes all your self control to keep your eyes from wandering lower, past the soft cotton of his shirt, over the handcuff buckle of his belt…
Focus.
“Now, what I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted,” his voice raises in volume, eyes throwing a pointed glare towards the jocks table before they settle back on you. “Would you like to have lunch with me?”
Eddie nods towards the Hellfire table, your eyes drifting across the cafeteria. The familiar group of males are already seated at their usual spots, engaged in a heated debate over something.
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to intrude.”
Eddie can sense your hesitation, shaking his head as he wraps an arm around your shoulders.
“I promise they don’t bite.” He grins, beginning to lead you toward the lunch table. “Can’t say the same for me though.”
He whispers that last part, his lips playfully grazing over the shell of your ear. Eddie can feel how you shiver in response, thoroughly satisfied with himself as you try to compose yourself once you reach his friends.
The guys barely spare either of you a passing glance, still deep in their conversation when Eddie pulls up a chair for you. Right at the head of the table next to his own.
You take a seat with a polite smile, each of the members of Hellfire now noticing your presence. And they can’t hide their utter shock and surprise as Eddie takes his seat beside you. He introduces you properly, going along the table until he reaches the two youngest members of Hellfire.
“While we haven’t been able to coax Sinclair back from the dark side,” he sighs, resting his arm on the back of your chair. “You obviously know Wheeler and Henderson already…”
“Oh, Mike knows her alright,” Dustin interjects, mischievously glancing over at his best friend. “He used to have the biggest crush—”
Mike elbows Dustin in the side before he can even finish his sentence, his cheeks flushing a deep shade of red as he hangs his head.
“Would you shut it?” he hisses, already noting the way Eddie’s gaze hardens as he tugs your chair impossibly closer to his own.
“No… Henderson, please continue.”
A brow quirks up from underneath his bangs, and suddenly the whole table has gone silent, all eyes on their fearless leader.
Dustin nervously swallows, tugging at the collar of his shirt. “It was… really stupid kid stuff, not important! Just forget I even brought it up. It was just a dumb— ”
The younger male’s voice raises an octave when he laughs, his nerves shining through.
“— right, just a dumb little crush,” Mike finishes, but Eddie doesn’t seem entirely convinced.
When you suddenly rest your hand on his knee under the table, his composure begins to slip. His eyes soften when he looks down at you. The whole table is practically holding their breath, in anticipation for Eddie’s next move.
But you beat him to it.
“Someone had to be the president of my fan club, right?” you giggle.
Mike just groans in response, head falling to the table while the other guys begin to chatter amongst themselves again, that underlying tension now beginning to melt. Much like you are under the weight of his gaze.
“Well, I’d gladly take over that position, if you’d have me.”
Your breath hitches at the underlying meaning behind his words, and, god, you’ve never wanted to kiss him more than you do right now.
When Eddie slowly begins to lean in, Dustin practically gags, the chiming of the lunch bell stopping everything in its tracks.
“Saved by the bell,” he mutters under his breath.
The brunette unwillingly rises to his feet and reaches out a hand for you to take, keeping you closely tucked into his side while he walks you to your next class.
Your mind was racing the rest of the afternoon, impatiently watching the hand on the clock tick by ever so slowly— desperately waiting for the final bell to ring.
After Eddie had walked you to history, he planted a playful kiss to the back of your hand. Giving you a dramatic bow before heading in the opposite direction toward Ms. O’Donnell’s classroom.
You were a fumbling mess once when you took your seat next to Nancy, and you could tell by the look on her face that she wanted to know everything.
So you spilled the beans during your walk to English afterwards, a plan beginning to form in your head with each step closer to Ms. O’Donnell’s.
Three failed kissing attempts was all your poor heart could take, so you spent the entirety of the last period plotting how you’d be able to get Eddie alone.
Which was how you found yourself pacing back and forth on the football field, eyes scanning the trees for any possible signs of movement. The palms of your hands are sweaty despite the crisp air, the fabric of your sneakers dampening with each step you take through the wet grass.
And you’re wondering if maybe this was a stupid idea, that maybe you heard Jeff wrong.
You knew Eddie dealt weed, the whole school did. But having never dabbled with the leafy substance yourself, you weren’t exactly sure where he made his deals at. So it was a stroke of luck when you overheard Jeff mention it in passing to Grant during English.
Something about how he was going to be late for rehearsal because some jock wanted to buy a bunch of reefer behind the football field. And who was Eddie to refuse a good sale? Especially when the douche was offering him a lot of money.
You’re abruptly broken out of your thoughts when you finally see his lanky figure emerging from the tree line and your heart kicks into first gear— about ready to burst out of your chest with each step he takes towards you.
His curls are a little damp from the mist hanging in the air, that signature dimple indenting his cheek when a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.
And despite your nerves, it’s a welcomed sight.
“Well, I didn’t take you for a stoner, sweetheart,” he begins.
But you don’t give him the chance to give you a proper greeting before you’re springing into action. Your fingers curl into the collar of his denim vest, meeting him halfway as you lean up to press your lips to his…
Only to end up knocking your heads together instead.
A small grunt of pain leaves him and your stomach twists in embarrassment, fingers gently pressing against your forehead as you wince.
“Oh my god, I am so—”
Those words barely have a chance to slip past your lips before he tilts your chin up and carefully molds his mouth over yours. His movements are slow but steady, as if gauging your response.
Your body reacts before your mind can fully process what’s happening, instinctively reeling him in closer and pressing your lips more firmly against his own. He hums softly, the sound setting your whole body alight.
As Eddie slips one of his hands around your waist, the other reaches up to tenderly cup your cheek. And when he begins to guide you backwards, you let him. Only stopping once your back is flush against the goal post. But even then, he doesn’t stop kissing you.
You can feel the cool metal seeping through the thin layer of your jacket, causing goosebumps to rise on the surface of your skin. But even with the cool air continuing to nip at your exposed skin, you feel like you’re on fire.
His lips are like molten honey, sugary sweet and practically melting you to your core. And you swear this is the closest to heaven you’ve ever felt.
When he eventually pulls away and you take a shuddering breath in, your eyes remain closed. You’re practically on cloud nine, basking in the lingering tingles that prickle over your lips. His hand remains on your cheek, thumb brushing over where his lips just were.
Eddie suddenly lets out a deep chuckle, the sound vibrating against your chest while his breath washes over the apples of your cheeks. Only then do your eyes flutter open and you realize the reason behind his amusement.
Your vision is completely obscured, the round lenses of your glasses fogged over from the heat of his breath. You can just barely make out his smile through the frames, but the silliness of the moment has you letting out a giggle of your own.
“May I?” he asks, the tips of his fingers grazing over where the arms of your glasses meet your temples.
You nod immediately, allowing him to remove them with the utmost care. He untucks his Judas Priest t-shirt from his jeans, using the soft cotton to clear the fog away from your lenses. Even with your blurred vision, you manage to catch a glimpse of his tummy before it’s hidden away beneath his shirt again.
When his eyes flick up to meet yours, he can’t help but feel like he’s really seeing you for the first time. Not hidden away behind a book or the thick wire frames of your glasses. Just you, in all your unbridled beauty.
“Thank you,” you murmur as he carefully places your glasses back onto the bridge of your nose.
Eddie just grins, leaning his forearm on the goal post above your head. He smells faintly like weed and peppermint gum, and you really want him to kiss you again.
“How’s about I give you a ride home, hm?”
You can’t hide your smile, nodding your head enthusiastically.
“I’d really like that.”
Eddie leans down to press one more searing kiss to your lips before he slips his hand in yours and pulls you along. The two of you now walking hand in hand across the football field.
“So, sounds like I’ve got some competition with Wheeler, huh?” he teases, squeezing your hand a little tighter in his.
“Oh come on, you’ve never had a crush on a babysitter before?”
Eddie takes a step in front of you, beginning to walk backwards while simultaneously guiding you forward.
“Well… considering my only babysitter was starting to bald and my uncle,” he practically shudders, “I’m gonna say no, sweetheart.”
series taglist: @sheneedsrocknroll92 @blckbrrybasket @your-nightmaredoll @missmarch-99 @fandom-princess-forevermore @mylovelycrazyworld @princesssunderworld
#the freak writes 🫧#my series: let’s go- don’t wait 🫧#eddie munson x fem!reader fluff#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x shy!reader#eddie munson fic
746 notes
·
View notes
Text
i wish i didnt have to go through everything alone
#i hate that i cant let myself be helped anymore#i hate that i dont have anyone i can go to easily when i feel overwhelmed#i just need a fucking hug#i miss my best friends#i miss symma being in half my classes#i miss the way she would leave class in a heartbeat for me sophomore year even tho i never told her everything that was going on#i miss noah#i miss him being here#i hate how empty our room feels#i hate how i feel like im losing everyone who meant so much to me#i miss aidne#god i fucking miss him#and at least i can try to do smth about symma or noah#i cant#do anything#they’re just gone#fully and done and i cant get a hug from it and i cant ask it for advixe#i loved him so much#i dont wanna use past tense for them anymore#i hate being on my period and crying every night because i just feel so alone#i want a home#i wanna apartment with a friend or two#and i want it to be mine#i dont wanna be floating aimlessly anymore
1 note
·
View note
Text
Down Home 1
No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as non/dubcon, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: The world's most famous heroes walk into a small town diner and change your life.
Characters: Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers
Note: Because of this.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. Thanks to everyone who reads this one and thank you for all your energy.<3
Love you all to Jupiter and back. Take care. 💖
It’s a slow day. Every day is slow out in Tumble Down. The township’s name tells the whole story. Everything there is in decline. It’s hard to imagine there was ever a time when the people weren’t tiny and forgotten in the hubbub of the bigger world. Since the mines closed and the canning factory was outsourced, it feels even smaller.
Smaller isn’t so bad. It’s simpler. You all know each other’s names and faces. You say hi and how are you and do what needs to be done. Simple is, simple as.
You here there isn’t much to do in most small towns. Not for fun or for work. You’re one of the lucky ones. You got a job down at the diner in your sophomore year. It helped pay for your daddy’s new engine and since then, it keeps you all afloat in the rising waters of disparity as they close in on Tumble Down.
You hum to the old radio that sits on the shelf you make sure to dust. The speakers crackle from time to time and the signal gets wonky in storm season, but the music’s never bad. It’s the classic stuff that always played in your mother’s kitchen.
You wipe down another table. Not because it needs it, just because it’s something to do. The day has been long and listless. Even the breakfast rush was lower than usual.
Darnell, the cook, whistles along from the back. Everyone knows he isn’t as mean as he looks. He just likes his space.
As you go back to the counter and lean on it, staring at the ticking clock, a roar cuts through the distance. You blink and look up, narrowing your eyes at the dusty country road outside. Wind rustles through the tall wheat in the field opposite and the noise rumbles closer and closer.
A man pulls in a motorbike. He’s going so fast that he has to circle the gravel lot before he can slow down. It’s not Lenny and his prized Harley but another man on a more modern-looking mount. Not far behind, another motorcycle zips through and the riders straddle their bikes as the survey the restaurant.
You narrow your eyes. You probably need glasses but you make do. The last time you got your eyes checked, you didn’t have enough for the frames.
The one man wears blue and red, an odd helmet on his head. Not a helmet at all but a sort of mask. The other man has dark hair to his chin and a beard to match. He’s all in black but his left arm shines with gold ripples. Not a sleeve, an arm, made of metal.
“Oh my lord,” you murmur in shock, “Darnell!” You holler over your shoulder, “you’re not gonna believe this.” You turn to the window as he pokes his head around, “not sure I do myself. Tell me my eyes aren’t lyin’.”
He looks above your head, an easy task for the mammoth cook. He hums and swirls around his spatula. “Thems those boys on the news. The one that was in the old war. Grandad’s battle.”
“I’m not going crazy with boredom?” You bubble.
He snorts. It’s as close to a laugh as you get from him. You spin back and hurry around the counter to grab a pair of menus. Still, you don’t want to seem too eager. You put down the menus and fiddle with a napkin holder instead.
The bell over the door jingles and swipe up the menus and turn. You really can’t believe it’s them. Yet, as Captain America removes his cowl, you’re certain. They look just like they do on the TV. Even with your sight, you can tell.
“Hello, fellas, how are you doin’ today?”
The dark-haired one, the Winter Soldier, glances at the other, his cheek dimpling, “well... we’re... uh...”
“We’re doing great,” Steve Rogers answers brightly. “Starving. You guys serve bacon? My buddy’s dying for some.”
“Um, yes, sirs, yes. Can I sit ya down?” You ask, hugging the menus closer.
“Please,” the Captain accepts as the other man stays silent and pensive, his eyes wandering down to the coffee stain on your apron.
“Just here,” you sweep away and wave them on with you. You stop beside the nicest booth and lay down a menu on each side, “have a seat.”
They do just as you bid. The blond puts his cowl on the table and unhooks the shield from his back to lay on the far end of the seat. He smooths back the sweaty strands of hair as his companion stretches his metal fingers. You sway nervously by the table, twitching as you remind yourself how to do your job.
“Well, can I get ya started with coffee? You look beat from the road.” You beam with the smile Mr. Welk says could outshine the sun.
“Not just the road,” the dark-haired one mutters as he rolls his shoulder. The one that connects to his real arm. “I’ll take one, please.”
“Can I get an orange juice, please,” the Captain asks.
“Course ya can. I’ll be right back. You have a look at the specials and give it a think,” you bounce and spin around.
You go to pour the orange juice and a cup of black coffee. Darnell lingers by the window. He only ever really appears to put a plate up but he watches the new arrivals.
You bring their drinks and step back, clasping your hands behind you.
“Did ya need cream or sugar for your coffee, sir?” You ask.
“Black’s fine,” he assures.
“No need for the sirs. Steve, Bucky,” Captain America insists, “we’re off duty.”
“Right, sorry about that, ssss...Steve,” you correct yourself. “You need some more time?”
“Think I’m decided,” Bucky intones, “what about you?”
“Set,” Steve confirms, “I’ll have the sunny side up with toast and sausage. Can I get some fruit on the side as well, please?”
He hands over the menu and you take it as you hold your smile. Your cheeks ache. Not because you have to force it but because you can’t stop. This is the most exciting thing to happen in Tumble Down ever. If Darnell wasn’t there, no one would believe you.
“Overeasy, bacon, extra bacon too, and some french toast, and uh... home fries.” Bucky offers up the second menu, “please and thank you.”
“Alrighty,” you preen, “I’ll put your order in.”
“Got it,” Darnell growls over the empty diner.
“He’s got good hearing,” you giggle nervously as you look between the men. “Ummmm, sorry, I’ll leave ya be.”
“You’re not bothering,” Steve assures. “I can see you’re dying to ask.”
He gives a gentle smile.
“Nah, oh, gosh. I’m sure ya get it all the time. I don’t wanna be one of those,” you put your hands up. “Really, you all look like you could use the peace and quiet.”
“Well, actually, I’ve been stuck with this meathead for days,” Bucky scoffs, “so please, I’d love to hear someone else’s voice.”
You laugh again. They’re funnier than you expect. They always look so serious on the TV.
“What... what are y’all doing here in Tumble Down? It’s a bit far from... anywhere.” You ask sheepishly.
“Tumble Down? Is that what it’s called?” Steve scratches his neck above his stained collar. “Well, we couldn’t get a signal so we’ve just been riding through. Saw the sign down the way and figured we’d get a bite.”
“He’s lying. He was falling asleep on his bike,” Bucky teases.
“Sure,” Steve shakes his head. “Only ‘cause I’m tired of you.”
You giggle again, “I thought y’all were friends.”
“Friends, partners, cursed with each other, have your pick,” Bucky snorts.
“He’s playing,” Steve says. “Look, we’re boring. Despite what you think. We’re a couple of old men bickering with each other. What about you? What about Tumble Down?”
“Ah, nothing really, sir. Steve,” you squeeze the menus tight at the edges. “Nothing going on since the coal law and that. Everyone’s all but run out. All but us.”
“Just you? Your family?” Steve wonders.
“Jesus, Steve, nosy much?” Bucky says over the brim of his mug.
“Sorry. He’s right. Like I said. Crotchety old man. I talk to the pigeons.”
You laugh again, “oh my, you are a hoot!” You slap your thigh emphatically, “I’m still my ma and pa. It’s just the three of us. They need help with the animals and that.”
“Animals?” Steve wonders, his posture shifting towards you.
“Chickens, cows. They got a farm. Was my grandpa’s. And his ma kept it going after he didn’t come home from... well, you’d know more about that time than me, I think.” You give a forlorn look to the floor.
“Oh, I’m so sorry about your grandfather. Great grandfather,” he corrects himself.
“Lotta good men gone,” Bucky mulls grimly.
“Yeah, my great granny said as much. I wouldn’t know though, but I heard the stories,” you dare to look at them again. “Sorry to bring up the bad memories.”
“Nah,” Bucky waves you off casually. “I got this nifty arm outta it.”
“And I got a shield so, you know, not all losses,” Steve chuckles.
“I s’pose,” you agree. “I’m gonna check on that food for ya. You good with your coffee?”
Bucky raises the mug, “delicious.”
You nod and turn with a swish of your skirt. You go up to the window and look over the ledge. “How’s it going, Darnell?”
“Going. I’m happy it ain’t Raylene here. She’s got a mouth on her, don’t she? Them sort don’t deserve that trouble,” he tisks.
“They’re nice. And Raylene is too. She’s just... Raylene,” you say, “can I help with anything?”
“I don’t wanna be rude but I’m tired of tellin’ ya to stay outta my kitchen. You know the grill likes to spit,” he shakes his head. “You go, I’ll let ya know when it’s ready.”
“Alright,” you back away and turn back.
Steve and Bucky lean over the table, their voices low as they chat. As you move around behind the counter, they both sit up and the former clears his throat. You smile as you take the cloth from your apron pocket and wipe the already clean counter.
As the radio buzzes, you hum without thinking. Stevie Ray Vaughan’s smoky voice mingles with the emotion plucked through electric strings. Your dad’s a big fan. He has old tapes with concerts on them and even went to one himself.
The bell rings and you nearly jump out of your shoes. You turn and scoop up the plates as you thank Darnell. He grumbles that he’s going out to have a smoke; his code for having a Tootsie Pop by the backdoor.
You bring the meals over to the table and set them down before the men. Their gazes make you sweat. It’s all a little more intense with no one else there.
“Thank you,” Steve says and Bucky echoes him.
“Not at all. Anything else? Water? Ketchup?”
“It all looks great as is,” Steve says, “you got a nice voice.”
“Oh, really? Ha, I was just humming out of tune. Sorry if I was too loud.”
“Not at all,” Bucky picks up his fork as he leans forward. He tilts his head. “You know this one?”
“Sure do. It’s Fleetwood Mac,” you answer. “One my all times.”
He grins and nods as he looks at Steve. Steve watches you with a smile of his own.
“Do you sing?” He asks.
“Me? Only in my shower or to the chickens. They usually hide in the henhouse then.” You tinkle with laughter.
“Ah,” Steve nods.
“But if... if ya really wanna suffer, I could try it,” you smile, “but uh, you know, Stevie Nicks, she’s one of a kind.”
“I’ve had worse,” Steve says.
You look between him and Bucky. You chew your lip and think. You follow the song as you try to recognise which verse it is. You squint and perk up as you catch your place.
“You just let me know when you’ve had enough,” you say before you start. Not only can you tell your pa that you met the super soldiers, you can tell him you sang for them. It’ll be a nice bit of excitement for the dinner table.
#steve rogers#dark steve rogers#bucky barnes#dark bucky barnes#dark!steve rogers#dark!bucky barnes#steve rogers x reader#bucky barnes x reader#marvel#mcu#captain america#down home#winter soldier#avengers
436 notes
·
View notes
Text
𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 ─ PB⁵
౨ৎ ─ summary | paigey being your girlfriend - a list of relationship "headcanons"
─ warnings | in a bullet-point formatting, i hope you guys like it! fluff (lmk if yall want nsfw ones bc i can provide), paige being DOWN BAD, social media tingz, maybe alluding to being outed but not really, some angst but you can skip over it, paigey being protective (duh), nothing else?
─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!
─ ev's notes | THIS IS SUCH LONG MESS BECAUSE I'M HAVING PAIGE BRAINROT RN, but i hope y'all enjoy nonetheless LOL being in my paige era i've read so many of these and i'm sure you guys have as well, so i'm making this as unique (or descriptive) as i possibly can to make it because it's more fun to read (and write cus im a sucker for details)
PRE-RELATIONSHIP STUFF
when you guys first started dating, i feel like paige would be kind of secretive about it
maybe secretive isn't the right word but very... private but not secret type of vibe (at least irl)
not because she doesn't want to show you off, because believe me, she wants to (she's a bragger what can i say)
but just because she wants to keep you all to herself for a while
she knows that as soon as people find out about it, everyone will be talking about it and making assumptions and she just wants to keep you to herself
at least for a couple months
she doesn't care about the public's opinions but she wants to make sure that y'all are LOCKED IN before she makes it public on social media
but it's clear to paige that y'all are very much locked in after the first couple weeks
she's not new to relationships and she's had her fair share but she can tell that it's different now
so the whole "not sure if i wanna hard/soft launch her cus what if we're not a long term" sentiment turns into "i wanna keep this special thing to myself ONLY for at least a couple months"
and of course the entire team knows paige is down bad for you, they've never ever seen her this WHIPPED
because paige seems like she'd be nonchalant and SHE IS... for people she doesn't give a fuck about
so when she likes someone, she LIKES someone
she is extra what can i say
they tease her about it and in any other situation, she would be annoyed but she loooooooves it because it's like "yeah i'm in the best most awesome relationship with the cutest sweetest and kindest girl in the PLANET"
you and paige would've definitely known of each other since freshman year but like... she's kinda intimidating so you sorta tried to steer clear of her
you were really close with some of the girls on the team, specifically azzi so you saw paige kind of a lot
but sophomore year, azzi kind of pushed you guys to be close and since she knows you guys so well, IT WORKED!
you guys clicked so quick and that doesn't happen a lot with paige, it takes a lot to earn her friendship
but you practically ripped down all her walls within like an hour of talking to her
definitely the first one to catch feelings
at least... to her ;)
very much friends to lovers trope with lots of sexual tension cus who doesn't love that?
i feel like after 3 months of being really close friends, you guys would spend like a shit ton of time together
you guys were ALWAYS together
she even tried to convince you to come to practice with her but you said no cus... what the heck
everyone knows... EVERYONE knows that paige likes you
and it kind of becomes like cemented (for paige at least) after she realized you were her literal COMFORT PERSON
like after every terrible, long practice or after losing games all she wants to do is be AROUND YOU so she could forget about everything
especially when she gets injured, she's such a wreck and the only person who made her feel better was you
it wasn't even what you said or what you did, it was simply just you
and after going through such a bad time with you, she realized that she liked you and she can't keep pretending
and she asked you (yaya!) and you said yes cus you liked her back (yaya!) and everything is just YAYA
so it's safe to say she knows she's found her soulmate within a month of knowing you
but she doesn't wanna seem like she's love-bombing you or whatever so she pretended to be nonchalant
which of course FAILS because she's down bad
so she tells you she loves you within like a month of dating
i KNOW it seems bad but you guys both felt it because of the whole injury and spending every moment together
when you know, you know vibes
she told you she loved you after you were there for her through some of the worst times of her life and you said it back of course and it's all cutesy
paige's love language is TOTALLY quality time and touch
even before you were dating, she just liked having her hands on you whether it was like holding your hand while walking through a crowd, or braiding your hair, or putting her head on top of yours or something as simple as just HUGGING you
but she kept it cordial of course cus y'all weren't dating
yeah that was all thrown out the window as soon you became her girlfriend
hands on you at ALL times, it becomes so subconscious neither of you even know you're doing it anymore
so remember that whole secret relationship thing?
well... everyone kind of figures it out online after like 3 months of dating
it was because of paige, poor girl couldn't keep her hands and lips off of you after a particularly hard game and somehow 🤨🤨someone gets a picture and it was all over twitter and tiktok the next day
literally "paige bueckers girlfriend" trending after an hour of getting posted
but neither of you cared too much about it because A. it was totally worth it cus the kiss was 😫😫😫 and B. she finally doesn't have to turn off her girlfriend mode when she's with you at games
cus she has the prettiest and best gf in the world and she wants everyone to know that
the only reason she was slightly annoyed was because she couldn't hard launch you on instagram :( poor girl had potential captions in her notes :( cus she's our little drama queen:(
but that doesn't stop her cus she ends up doing it! (shameless plug right there hehehe)
now that she can freely touch you and just be herself finally, she literally doesn't GAFFF
of course nothing like over the top because sure she loves PDA to a certain extent and she's an athlete so she needs to keep it civil
RELATIONSHIP STUFF
we've already covered how paige is a physical touch and quality time girly
and paige loves spending literally all her free time with you because you just recharge her
but it isn't in like an overwhelming way
paige understand that sometimes you need quiet time (or vice versa) but the thing is she doesn't even need you to talk just being around you is enough
so idk if it's necessarily QUALITY time but just being around you and spending every free second she has with you tells you that she is in love with you
paige is the most protective person IN THE WORLD, not just with you like in general
it doesn't even have to be someone she knows, if she sees someone giving someone else a hard time SHE WILL STEP IN!
and with her friends, y'all have seen her... she does not back down and will literally murder anyone who comes for the people she cares about
so if that's with people she doesn't know, and her friends, you guys can imagine how crazy she gets over you
if somebody says something even slightly consendecing or mean, slap. someone looks at you the wrong way? slap. somebody breaths wrong around you, slap.
obviously she won't lay a hand on them first but likeeee would she back down, nope
she is actually your guardian angel
like at parties, her hand is always on you and she never ever leaves your side
you need to get a drink, she's coming to
if you need to pee? she'll wait in the bathroom for you
yeah don't expect her to leave your side
because even when she IS by your side, there is always a weirdo in your guys' ear trying to get with one (or both!) of you
but yeah she's not afraid to defend you when it comes to literally anything
and this doesn't only apply to strangers, if there is someone that you know (your friend, her friend, etc) she WILL stand by you and defend you
like she doesn't shy away from confrontation, she will say something but only if you want her to
and GOD HELP THEM if you shed a single tear, cus the next morning you bet she's saying something
like i said, paige is a confrontational person and that means she's the biggest communicator
if she has a problem, she will tell you so that you guys can fix it
but sometimes she can come off a little argumentative and like she's just attacking you
she uses a lot of "you" statements so it seems like she's pushing the blame all on to you
so that can be the root of a lot of your guys' arguments when paige is only trying to solve the issues
but of course paige doesn't back down so she will be arguing with you even if she doesn't even know why, she just hates being wrong
but she doesn't let you leave or go to sleep unless the problem is fixed (or at least on the road to being fixed)
she'll give you space, she'll go another room to take a breather but she will not let you leave until it is fixed
usually after the breather you guys can come to an agreement and then paige usually hugs all the anger outta you
cus who could resist her?
if the argument lasts a couple days (it usually doesn't unless it's something serious) paige will talk it out with her mom or her friends
and you'll usually do the same
and paige will force you to sit down and talk about it until it is FIXED because she hates not being able to talk to you
and when you guys do eventually talk about it, especially if it's a serious topic, it will end with tears with both parties
but you guys always make up and everything will be better
okay okay no more angst ... for now hehehe
i feel like paige's nervous tic would be braiding the ends of her hair so i feel like that would transfer to YOU somehow
she just likes braiding your hair!!!!!! or just running her hands through your hair, it would help her relax
and if you're like me, it will help you relax as well
if you're black/have braids, she would only touch your hair if you let her!
paigey takes pictures OF EVERYTHING so obviously that includes you
her camera roll consists of ONLY you atp, like... 20% pics of literally anything else, and the rest would just be pictures of you or something to do with you
and oh my gosh don't get me started on the damn .5's of you, some of them are HORRENDOUSSSS and paige uses them as reaction pictures sometimes
and you found out from azzi that she does indeed use them in the girls groupchat
but she argues that you just look adorable which you respectfully disagree
oh and don't get me started on her tiktok drafts, she has at least 1,000 (rip her storage)
and when y'all started dating she just makes cute relationship tiktoks but she never posts them
EXPECT the "you're spinning me around, my feet are off the ground one" cus she wants to prove to the world that she has muscles
and the tiktok girlies will cry but WHO CARES!
oh and if you're on the basketball team, they will started to fan-girl over you as well
HELLA TIKTOK EDITS
and paige will favorite, repost and comment on them
like the most down-bad, insane comments you can think of
"GET THE STRAP GET THE STRAP!" is one of many ✨✨
if you aren't on the team, trust the tiktok girlies will find a way and they will make edits of you
and paige will do the same
obviously you do the same for her, your favorites are just paige edits atp (mine too)
ESPECIALLY THE GET IT SEXY ONE OMLL
and everyone will make ship edits and cutesy things like
"omg the way paige looks at her" and like a slideshow of paige being like all 😍😍😍
after paige gets more comfortable with like the media knowing about you two, she posts you every five seconds
usually like stories and stuff and especially if you’re also a basketball player, she reposts ALL your stuff
she is a proud gf !!!
she also has a highlight FOR SURE, she loves
also she def has like 10 diff wallpapers of you and her, some are really cute and some are really… 🫣
also paige strikes me as the type to like be texting you ALL DAY
and girl doesn’t care if you reply, she will send you 8 consecutive messages of different things
“omg look at the group chat 😂 *insert screeshot*” “baby they ran out of fucking caramel at dunkin, how does that happen ?” “i ended up going to a local cafe why did this shit cost me 9$” “baby you’re coming to my game on saturday right?” “HAHA look at this meme 😂” “why haven’t you responded to my tiktok’s in 2 days?”
yes she 100% uses the laughing with tears emoji argue with the WALL
or skull emoji
she also sends you 20 minute snapchat vlogs and they’re so chaotic, especially when she’s at practice or something
kk will steal her phone and say hi then you’ll hear them play fighting for like 80% of the vlog
also she does grwm’s on snapchat too when she’s at away games and her morning voice is SOOOO SEXY CUTE
↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !
↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers fanfiction#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers#uconn headcannons#uconn wbb#uconn huskies#uconn women’s basketball#ncaa women’s basketball#women's college basketball#wcbb fic#wcbb x reader#wcbb
840 notes
·
View notes