#sometimes people don't know i have “communication issues” sometimes they just hate that i dress weird

[barnbridges]

every single time i see some fake tism news i close tiktok down to where i only get basically only one creator who is the single most autistic creature known to man infodumping about her life, truly achieved enlightenment.

[reirasheadcanons]

UPPER MOONS X READER (ONESHOT)

Featuring: Akaza, Douma, Kokushibo

Cw: none, just some cute headcanons, English isn't my first language, so I apologise if I make any mistakes.

Hope you enjoy!!

note: mention of having a family, kinks and alone time.

Akaza:

He is awkward towards any women expect you. He believes you both get along very well which is the only thing that matters to him. He have never told you that, but sometimes he is dreaming of you both having a family.

He enjoys giving you gifts of any kind. "Hey doll, do you want me to bring you anything when I get back?" "A-akaza you don't hav-" "I'll bring you something, see you later."

He has a lot of trust issues that's why he ALWAYS gets you together in missions (even if a hashira is around).

It may sound stupid, but he truly believes in love at first sight. So basically when you first caught his attention, he wanted you. "Do you love me?" "Of course I do! Are you dumb?" "Looks who's talking, you are really getting ahead of yourself, aren't you love?"

Once you told him Douma scares you, it was the last time Douma has heard of you. (Akaza was really proud of himself for that).

Even though he is a demon, he doesn't want to give you the impression that he ACTUALLY eats humans. (he starves himself when you are around).

Douma:

He is a psychopath and you know it. "When I get back from my temple, want to go outside and haunt people?!?" "Douma I don't want to." "B-but I-" "No." Your answer was clear. "Fineee only because it's you 😊"

"Hey, hey y/n! Lord Kibutsuji told me I did good!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??" One answer, you couldn't. He always gets excited when he gets praised. "Good job Douma, good job." You pat his head sweetly. From now on, he is the happiest demon alive.

He hated when you talked about other upper moons in front of him. "Douma, isn't lord Kokushibo so cool?" Silence. "Aren't I cool enough for you y/n?" You knew that attitude. He was being jealous. And you knew that Douma being jealous isn't the best thing.

Other than that, your boyfriend had a very weird and unusual kink. He loved painting your nails for you. Red, blue, yellow, it doesn't matter. As long as his darling is satisfied.

In your alone time, he enjoys hugging you. You can't say no to him. You know he won't listen. He wants for himself. He is the only one who can claim you. What a man huh.

Once, he saw you hanging out with Akaza and he quickly joined. Sometimes you say to yourself that it's better without him.

Kokushibo:

Something about this man drives you crazy. His eyes, his scent, his aura.. and yeah. You eventually found out that he accepted Douma's offer and he stared wearing perfume. You teased him A LOT when you found out.

As lord Muzan's favourite upper moon, he has to stay in missions more than usual. He always knew how to pay back for that. Gifts, dresses, food. Everything to satisfy your needs and to win your heart. "Moonlight, I brought you this dress do you like it?" Of course you did.

He had a really ward time to talk/communicate with the other upper moons, which really caused you anxiety. "'Shibo, do you get along with the others?" Silence. "I do." "No you don't", "I do.", "No.", 'Yes." That kept going for a while.. You knew he was trying really hard to talk with them. You also knew he hated it when they stared at you.

When the other upper moons found out about your relationship with Kokushibo, you were in serious danger. Although lord Kibutsuji didn't even paid attention to it, the others did. You decided to stay away from them and only wait in Kokushibo's temple. As it's normal for a human, the infinity caste scared you a lot.

It is believed that Kokushibo is a really tough demon. When it comes to his nightmares he isn't the same. He once saw his twin brother on his sleep, something that caused tears in his eyes. You didn't know much. You only knew his name was Yorrichi. After all, you weren't even allowed to call out that name. You stayed close to him, hugging him, telling his it's going to be alright. He was so glad to have you.

He was really insecure of his looks. And that's the main reason why he didn't want to be seen with you. A goddess like you, with a monster.. what could the world think? It didn't matter to you. He was yours and you accepted him.

HOPE YALL ENJOYED IT! I APOLOGISE IF IT'S TOO SHORT!! SEE YOU NEXT TIME<3

[verdemoun]

timewarp au fun facts

'people who have been personally victimized by the o'driscolls' is a support group that meet once a fortnight. it's just kieran, annabelle and jake adler. sometimes arthur goes. activities range from hiking trips and volunteering at community centers to playing poker and getting drunk on the couch while occasionally saying 'fuck colm o'driscoll'

YES jake adler is there he pretty much lived as a survivalist and then happened to bump into the gang like oh you guys were born in 18-- too? he has the same tendency of getting drunk and crying about how much he misses his wife as sadie does.

as kieran adjusts to modern era and starts recovering mentally he develops a really dark sense of humor (well really he always had a dark sense of humor but he didn't live long enough with the gang be comfortable expressing it). some of his favorite one-liners are 'still in one piece' and 'nothing to lose your head over'

karen and sean actually end up having a baby which a) leads most to an existential crisis over whether they are considered alive or dead b) unabashed fear over what this child could become. her nickname is the crimson terror she's got sean's hair and brains with karen's personality. she calls both lenny and sean dad and jenny and karen mom. even this child knows lenny and jenny are her only chance for survival

arthur and eliza co-parent isaac. isaac is actually the parent in both relationships and is constantly having to explain technology and current era things to them. arthur still insists on teaching him 19th father-son stuff which includes fishing and how to shoot and clean a gun

arthur morgan at parent-teacher meetings genuinely failing to understand how isaac is in the wrong for knocking out a kid who was showing his girlfriend's nudes to the rest of the class

isaac definitely went to juvie. he was already committing crimes before jack showed up (he blames it on the morgan genes, which arthur hates)

i'm not saying trelawney is responsible for the time warp but i am saying 19th century america should really address the issue of seemingly omnipotent well-dressed men with amazing moustaches running around. trelawney never died but is present in both timelines. when asked why he can't go back and warn people of various things coming (don't kill micah, john), he simply replies it's a canon event.

trelawney has in fact tried this, which has lead to multiverses including the various endings of rdr2, whether javier is taken in alive or killed by john in 1911, or undead nightmare. he will no longer risk it because he likes being able to go back in time and see his wife and children <3 he learned the hard way they don't exist in every universe

[demonir]

dude now I'm just sitting here staring at a wall thinking abt how fucked up being lgbt is...

Don't get me wrong I'm happier knowing who I am and I shudder to think what would be of me if I had never found out, there's so many queer people out there that will welcome you with open arms and guide you through or just simply offer you a shoulder to cry on and that's wonderful I love that and we need more of that

But then there's the rest of the people, the assholes that want you dead just for existing, the ones that are less vocally hateful and might tolerate being in a room with you but should you need anything they'd rather let you starve than approach, the "I support you but" people that say are open minded and supportive but the moment you cross some invisible line of theirs you are no longer "one of the good ones" and must be dealt with.

We've all seen these people, they might be strangers, coworkers, acquaintances, friends, family and even our partners and their words and actions hurt like knives. But a lot of us have learned that we shouldn't waste our time with them if we can avoid it, turn around, block them, leave the room, move out of the house if you can, we can do these things

But what happens when the hatred is coming from inside the community itself? I cannot begin to tell you how soul breaking it is for me when I see discourse like "LGBT without the T!" or "Asexuality doesn't belong in the LGBT" or "If you're bi but in a straight relationship then you're a liar/traitor" or "If you don't pass as your gender then you're not truly trans" and these are just some off the top of my head, there are so many more and even if they don't personally affect me it still hurts me to see it so much.

You're not making the community nicer or safer by dictating how someone should exist, there are no "traitors" there are no "liars" there are no "pretenders" everyone is just trying to live their life while staying true to themselves but everyone around them is constantly telling them they are wrong for it, not gonna lie to you I'm sometimes afraid that I'll get someone telling me I'm not truly nonbinary because I'm not androgynous or use they/them and I'm easily perceived as a woman, I get afraid I'll be told that what I'm doing is just a phase by other queer people despite the fact that I've been trans since I was 14 and it took me all those years to be able to come to terms with the fact that yes I love dresses, yes I like makeup, yes I'm fine with she/her pronouns, yes I sometimes find it endearing to be called a girl, but no I am not a woman and I'll never be.

But guess what? being afab carries this weird notion that I am somehow harmless or at least less of an issue than lets see uhh oh yeah amab trans people! trans women get labeled predators, groomers and a danger to everyone around them so often and the punishment for not passing as their desired gender is far greater than anything I've ever personally received. People have let these notions about birth genders and sexualities carry on to their trans views in macabre and harmful ways. You want to be wary of men? sure, there's an extensive history of issues that make your fears rational and justified... but why are you pointing your finger at a trans woman? Because she has stubble or a beard? no long hair? doesn't like dresses? doesn't want hrt or surgeries of any kind? has a deep voice? because she has "male interests"? do you not realize how harmful that is?

That's not to say trans men don't get a similar treatment, but I don't see them being labeled as dangerous and violent even half as much as trans women do, it's this notion that being born with a penis somehow makes you vile or something???? unless you prove to us how innocent and righteous you are by looking exactly how I want you to, staying 5 meters away from me and never displaying any sort of sexual attraction towards anyone ever otherwise I am calling the police on you

That's bogus nonsense and I'm absolutely tired of it, stop carrying societies old and nasty views of gender and sexuality into this community that is about supporting and uplifting people no matter how they want to be, and while we're at it someone's presentation and physical appearance isn't indicative of their morality

I wish every trans woman on tumblr right now that feels afraid to speak up about the current situation or even just their life experiences as a trans person a very very happy rest of their lives, and I wish every trans woman who IS speaking up about stuff a very happy rest of their lives as well

Again just so we're clear, I'm nonbinary and afab she/he he/she whatever order so I should in theory not be the target to any uhh "mysterious" blog bans and stuff, however if my blog dies after this post know that I did not do it myself.

Stand up for trans women always and forever, we are all fighting together and there is no glory in hurting each other

[guardian-of-fun-times]

❄️Toxic Cosplayers: Frostplay❄️

This is going to be a long-ass post, so get comfortable with your favorite drink and a snack. As for me, the tea is hot and I'm ready to spill.

If you don't already know, this is Juliette, better known as Jacoby or Frostplay online. A band enthusiast, cosplayer, influencer, public figure, suicide prevention advocate, and YouTuber hailing from Southern California.

When I first saw Juliette, I assumed they were either Genderfluid or Trans in which they never stated until they made the post: "I'm a Girl!" after an Instagram account "exposed" her for wearing a binder. The account no longer exists because it was reported and deactivated.

I met Juliette at Anime Los Angeles years ago and she was very standoffish and rude to me seeing that I was also cosplaying the same character. I saw her again at ALA as Jack Frost and she asked me what happened to my leg noticing that I was in a knee brace and carried a crutch to lean on while I had my staff in my other hand.

She wasn’t well-liked in the Jelsa community circa 2013-2015 because she used to fail to credit artists. I never really paid attention to their work because of that, and some things she did… she came across at times as if she thought she was actually Jack Frost, and therefore the authority. It was just a different vibe to others who can have fun but, end of the day you know they know they aren't Jack Frost or any other character.

Her YouTube seemed to have some blurred lines where they thought they were THE Jack Frost. There’s a difference between playing the part at a cosplay convention, or for kids, but end of the day, even the Disney face characters know they aren’t actually Cinderella or something.

Another thing that disappointed me. How can you cosplay Jack Frost and ignore children? That’s such a big part of him. He’s the one who gets the Guardians to reconnect with the kids. Jackson was entertaining the kids. Jack was there for the kids well before he was a guardian.

You might know, that Frostplay went to Disney and dressed as Jack to get those photos and videos with the Elsa face character. Disney face characters have to feign ignorance of things outside of their Disney universe, so putting her in a rough position and potentially causing issues for her at work -- all for internet clout.

So, the stuff about Juliette and the Elsa cosplayers is the tip of the iceberg. She went full Q Anon. She "came out" as cisgender and straight in an emotional video. She was pretending to be in love with them for about five years, so it's a whole fucked up thing.

For a while, it was clear that her whole thing with Jack was some sort of coping mechanism for insecurity about who she was. She threw herself into the character so much that she dated two people at the time, both were Elsa cosplayers. So, it wasn't just one. She broke hearts and pushed people away.

There was a girl named Sofie before Alison. Sofie was from Florida and flew out here a time or two. I still think Juliette will one day accept that she's gender fluid or trans. Plus I know someone who told me that she once used a pseudo penis as a vessel to urinate through, sometimes. So, that adds to it. She's from a conservative area and that definitely influenced her. As for her being rude: she seemed to start gatekeeping the character.

She got awfully jealous and upset that GuardianFrosty on Instagram had taken inspiration from her Royal Jack Frost cosplay. He was literally was driven off Instagram and deactivated his account a few years ago for months because of Frostplay and their friends/followers since they kept sending hate, and death threats if he ever showed up at any California convention.

Claiming a character is childish behavior. Cosplay who you want, when you want. If other people have issues, let that trash take itself out.

[nozomi-kaizoku]

One thing that genuinely pisses me off is how my dad will constantly point out me, my sister, and my mom's shortcomings and be so quick to blame us for it, yet when we point out his shortcomings that are genuinely harmful, all of a sudden he's "being invalidated", and that we "hurt his feelings" and shit, AND HE DOESN'T EVEN CONSIDER HOW WE FEEL EITHER WHICH FUCKING SUCKS!

Literally just today my parents were arguing about how my mental health was affecting my ability to attend school, and he's over there saying "oh, we should put [him] in a boarding school", "[he]'s doing this on purpose" yap yap yap, basically blaming me for all of this shit. (I put m pronouns in the brackets cause he was misgendering me the whole time btw)

And then I go an step out to get something, he calls me over, and basically just starts shaming me (in front of my mom an sister btw) for getting suspended and sharing how I feel about mr. Gonzales n shit, and when my mom tried to explain and elaborate on something to him, he completely blew her off.

And my mom (bless her heart btw) was literally trying to defend this asshole because she loves him, like a lot, and I feel bad that she has to put up with this tbh.

"he didn't know, he's trying his best" Not only does he know, HE'S SAYING THESE THINGS IN THE MOST DEGRADING MATTER POSSIBLE JUST TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD FOR GETTING SUSPENDED, AND I JUST SJFJKFHERUFERFHR /NEG

Also, I accidentally bought $20 worth of shit on Thursday because he gave me his credit card to buy a soda, and he got in trouble for letting me go out and spend that much, and instead of holding himself accountable, he decides to drag it to today (TWO DAYS LATER) and complain about him "being thrown under the bus", like I'M SORRY BUT YOU'RE THE 50 SOMETHING YEAR OLD MAN BEING PUT IN CHARGE OF MYFINACIALLY IRRESPONSIBLE MENTALLY ILL ASS, YOU WERE THE ONE THAT GAVE ME THE FUCKING CREDIT CARD AND DIDN'T BOTHER TO STOP ME.

and oh man am I getting genuinely tired of his fucking trauma dumping.

He talks about how his mental health and how angry he is at something, yet when we have the AUDACITY to try and talk about how WE feel, instead of taking the time to listen and understand, he basically dismisses us and does this thing I personally call "fake praising" (which is basically when he gives someone praise but it's in such a condescending and almost sarcastic tone to where it doesn't feel like genuine praise at all), and even straight up invalidates us n shit, it's fucking infuriating man.

And the fucked up part? whenever my mom does these things, all of a sudden it's this horrible abusive thing and that he's a selfish bitch, which upsets me because unlike him, she doesn't have as much control over it (though she's working on it), and both she and I have BPD, which makes this even more fucked up because he's so quick to judge us for the same shit he does just because we have a mental illness we can't control.

It infuriates me so much how he's quick to dismiss other people's struggles and sometimes tell them it's their fault, and then the minute he receives ANY amount of criticism against genuinely shitty actions, all of a sudden he's a victim?? FUCK THAT!

I'd say he has a big ego and it's becoming an issue, but i don't want to give the NPD community any shit (since they already got so much stigma on their hands), and I'm not gonna say he's faking any of this either, cause that's not okay, but he REALLY heeds to get a therapist to talk to instead of dumping his issues on the rest of his family.

OH! did I forget to mention he makes weird comments bout my body without my consent anytime I dress alternatively, and he's told me in the past that I have an "athlete's body"? Yeah, kind of weird..

He does ALL of this, and yet still wonders why I hate him.

man is it infuriating...

EDIT: forgot to mention that he doesn't even go to my appointments, nor has he even MET my therapist, or any of that shit, so he has no right to even talk about my mental health like that.

Also, he's extremely invasive about how my medications are working and if I took them n shit, and he says it's "so I can know if my coworker Brian can be prescribed them".

like first off the medications working bit is something for my doctor to ask, not you, second off, I get if you're reminding me, but for you to basically come at me and yell at me for not taking them and then acting like I got angry because I didn't take those medications because "I can tell that you're off them", and third off, if Brian really wanted to talk about my medications so that he can speak with his doctor about it, he should talk with me directly so that he can know first hand how it works and what the side effects are, he doesn't need to have my dad (who has no knowledge about mental health medications whatsoever) come and ask invasive questions about my medications and risk spreading harmful misinformation that's gonna get him killed.

Let's just say I'm probably gonna have him talk to my therapist on my behalf so that he actually, yknow, LEARNS NOT TO BE A FUCKING DICK TO THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM??

[fracturedporcelaindoll]

Dear diary,

I've been considering getting hair cut short. One of those bob styles cause hate how the heat makes my medium length hair feel so icky~

Read a few articles on styles and on hair. Did you know you're hair grows the fastest between ages 15 to 20 or 25 depending on article? Apparently guys after 30, may experience thinning and hair loss because hair doesn't grow as quickly after 30 and for girls it's like after 40 to 50 that hair doesn't grow as quickly according to various beauty articles.~

So I don't know, mean could cut hair short but what if it took forever and a week to grow back out? I don't even think short hair would look good on me, less variety for styling but at the same time I just dont think am pretty atm either~

I think def want to try blunt or curtain bangs tho, they look cute and are kinda childish and tbh I want the adorable factor tho maybe I am just not that cute?~

Also like never ever foam hot cocoa pple, I ordered a small hot cocoa and the barista made it like it was a latte and the taste, sooo awful but didn't want to waste the purchase. I mean if I were a more less caring or wasn't worried about being confrontational in public I would have said something~

Pillows, I need a good pillow, am sure if I had one it might help improve sleep but I've yet to find a good one. Itd have to be fluffy like a cloud and cool like a winter breeze. I saw the most adorable pillow ever but problem is it's 270 with tax. Like if it were 80, I'd consider it sure expense but might be worth it if it's as good quality as claimed by advertising.~

Unfortunately I am just not sure, I mean I'd have to save for like at least a few months to get it and do I really need it? Its childish cause shaped like a dashound in a hot dog costume... but like where would I find such an adorable pillow again, it's unique~

I need to decide Halloween costume too, I mean if do go ahead and get gothic outfit from poll could pair it with some bat wings or angel ones and have costume. But that's like putting a bulleyes on yourself, dressing like an angelic being or succubus/bat demon girl would make people stare~

Plus the demon/succubus aspect is kinda ironically hilarious cause I can't even flirt with guys or girls for that matter, little miss shy and awkward~

I was brave and contacted customer service over missing package and about refund. I was ping ponged back and forth between company and shipping provider until finally got confirmation they'd issue refund as package was lost and couldn't determine where it got lost at etc~

I didn't actually talk, it was online communication through service line but still~

I took some pictures of sky because the clouds were particularly picturesque and fluffy~ I felt so self conscious though like do I just look weird or something? Haven't you ever seen someone look up at sky with camera before?~

I am tempted to just avoid public all together until October but realistically I'll get lured out in July for cotton candy vendors, fresh squeezed fair lemonade and prize contests to try to win cute plushies <4th of july>. Do I think fireworks are beautiful? Yes but am one of those people that would want to wear noise cancelling headphones and look like a dork cause of it~ the loud noise though just unsettles me, it's like really loud thunder or lighting makes me jump scare myself sometimes~

I found a Harry Potter themed bar crawl event and golf event that I kinda want to go too. Not so much the bar as mini golf the thing is I know it'll be crowded and am not the best at mini golf soooooo do I really want to torture myself mentally by weaving through crowds, long lines and ultimately failing to win prizes by missing the getting the golf ball into the hole?~

Plus I'd want to wear a harry potter themed costume and have nothing to wear for that~

Including pictures of clouds because I can~

[grimalkinmessor]

10+11?

10. Top three favourite fic tropes.

OH BOY *scrubs my grubby paws rogether* Ain't that a fun question? I'm a big fan of AUs—soulmates, hanahaki, A/B/O, you name it, I'm probably in love with it. My all time favorite trope is definitely arranged marriage, though. Or—I guess you could say it's technically dubious consent? Because it's really the power imbalance and the struggle for freedom that I really like about it, it doesn't have to be specifically Arranged Marriage, it could just as well be (and often is) captor/captive. The CODEPENDENCE. The PARASITISM that develops 😩👌✨ They need each other more than air, more than anything but they're killing each other, they're making each other stronger and worse, even if you die you'll never be free of me because a part of you is always in me and a part of me is soldered to you, I wish I could hate you, I wish I could love you, I wish things were different— the GOOD SHIT ✨👌🤌💕💞💖🙏✨❤️‍🔥💯✨⭐🔥🌟

Which sort of leads into my second favorite trope; fantasy AUs!!! Put some magic in that shit!!! Drop down some monarchial or even dictoral intrigue!!! World build!!!! Make that character a dragon!!!!! HELL yeah!!!!!!! Fantasy AUs are always so so so much fun for me and I love them. It's about 🤌🤌 the political/magical/moral intrigue 🤌🤌🤌🤌

Now. I say that vaguely because one of my favorite tropes that is hard as FUCK to find are creature AUs. Selkie and wing AUs specifically. Selkie AUs because they tie back into the above very nicely, but WING AUs always have me by the throat because it's just,,,,,everything to me. I desperately, desperately wanted wings as a kid (and still to this day), so a world where everyone has wings is my ultimate escapism fantasy. Plus the angst that tends to come with it?? Top tier, real shit. Your wings are broken, they're stigmatized, they're useless, they've been taken from you—or, my fucking favorite, they've never been touched :) Never been groomed :)) And the first time someone shows them that sort of intimate yet common affection you just start shaking because it's so overwhelming to feel loved. To be cared for. ESPECIALLY if the wings in question are broken, useless, bad luck. LOVE that shit 💖

11. Three tropes that are fine but overrated.

Tattoo/Flower shop AUs. They're alright but honestly they feel so much like coffee shop AUs to me that I can't really see the difference lmao. Plus it usually comes with too much fluff for me to find it interesting, even as someone who loves flower language and loves tattoos.

Gonna contradict myself with this one, but soulmate AUs. They can be good, but when you don't dive into the inherent darkness of having choice snatched away from you by fate itself and the horror that can come with knowing someone is the other half of you, connected forever with no way out, then what's the point honestly. The whole reason I adore soulmate AUs is because the very premise of it all is so fucked up, dressed up and romanticized as something sweet and wholesome. If you make it something ACTUALLY sweet and wholesome—which many people do—then I think it gets old quick.

Fake Unrequited Love. OH my God this one. It's fine, alright, it's fine but it irritates the shit out of me most of the time. I adore the angst of unrequited love, and to just say "well it only LOOKS unrequited because they didn't COMMUNICATE clearly enough haha the sillies" babe that is just dressed up miscommunication. Guh. Sometimes it doesn't bother me but honestly it's always been overrated to me. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Bonus one: There Was Only One Bed Trope. It's fine but I have personal issues with it. I like it in theory but it's one of the very few tropes that triggers the hell outta me. I wish I could enjoy it, but since I can't it just feels like it's everywhere, therefore making it overrated to me specifically.

(Hilarious because I keep intending to make use of it in my Matsulight fic but I chickened out the first time lmao)

[baked-potatoes-rule]

food for thought/the disease to please

Come to think about it, Shauna is every person who at some point in their lives, struggled with their sense of self.

Someone might perceive Jackie as being the mean girl/controlling type of a person at first. She's captain of the team,she has a cool boyfriend,she has a sidekick that follows her around(whom she tells how to dress to impress some dude she doesn't even like) and has planned their entire lives together. Jackie however is none of these things. She had her own way of showing her love and appreciation for Shauna.

I think the main issue was Shauna's.

Despite being very smart, she has serious communication issues. Everyone who has ever been faced with the need to people please and be a certain way so they are accepted, can eventually tell. She sucked so bad at communicating and she was mad at Jackie for not seeing her or hearing her.

We can even see her lack of skill at communicating with her daughter and Jeff. Instead of confronting him about his "affair" ,she goes and has one of her own. She's keeping her daughter at a distance because she's affraid she might lose her or she dies. Shauna is so affraid of getting hurt, but she doesn't realise she's the one setting her self up for pain most of the time.

We can even look at this like that : Shauna is the people trying to fit in, Jackie is the society said people are trying to fit in. They hate how it represses them and doesn't want them for them,tries to change them,tell them how they should do things and all of that makes them resent it, and sometimes even withdraw from it(society). But at the same time they want to be part of it,they need to be part of it. Humans are social creatures and we need each other.

Shauna is struggling with codependency and she doesn't have a healthy way of managing her emotions. She's avoidant,secretive and resentful to a Jackie who just is how she is. The girl doesn't even know how Shauna feels about all of that untill she reads her journal.When she snaps at her about the dress, Jackie just tells her to wear whatever she wants. This also shows us that sometimes we just have to stand up and speak up for ourselves,instead of fearing we might let others down.

I don't think Shauna lost her authenticity because of living in Jackie's shadow. I think it's her own struggle that was caused by her childhood experiences and family dynamics (I don't remember mentions of young Shauna's family situation. I might have missed it in-between being distracted looking at other things).

Shauna hated Jackie but she also loved her. I think what hurt Shauna most, was that she wasn't brave enough to put her self out there for Jackie to actually see her,when Jackie was still alive. We all want to be accepted and loved but will sometimes sabotage our selves because we fear rejection.

Jackie to Shauna : " you've become kind of a badass out here."

It is known that people grow when put out of their comfort zones. Them crushing into the wilderness is the definition of"out of my comfort zone."

Jackie wasn't a bad friend. Shauna's perception of her made it seem so,to Shauna. Part of why she also resents Jackie is how effortlessly she fits in while she is kind of a pushover. And we can see from her journal entries (and her dissapointment from when the wilderness chose Natalie instead of her), she's upset because why is she always the one put aside, when she has potential just as much as everyone else,if not more when it comes to certain skills. She wants her worth to be seen and acknowledged and the inferiority complex is strong with her.

Idk...i hope we see more of how her psyche operates when they are still out there and maybe even some flashbacks from her childhood.

[grimdarksora]

Personal gender vent under the cut. System-wide stuff, but my blog is most relevant (and private). Lots of negative body image and dysphoria issues.

(and when I use 'I' it's meant to be used for the entire system)

I wish I could admit out loud to regretting starting T. If I had one wish in this entire world, it would be to undo the changes from testosterone. Not money, not fame, I would wish to have never started T. I hate not being able to cry so much it's driving me mad, I hate my facial hair, I hate my voice. I feel like I can't properly be any of the genders I am because I'm a mix of all presentations at once in a really dysphoric way.

I genuinely feel so uncomfortable in my body I'm considering laser hair removal. I think if I have to go through life with this beard I just... I can't. I would rather die. I want to peel my skin off each time my stubble comes in, yes even the men in our system. Even they hate it, it's painful at worst and uncomfortable/itchy at best. Lack of facial hair was never a thing I felt dysphoric about, if anything I feel so dysphoric with it. I feel repulsive to myself. I like facial hair on others, but mine makes me want to cry. I can't even take compliments on it, I tune them out and auto-reply with a thanks.

Even now I worry about how that comes off, as if thinking myself disgusting will make other trans people who look like me think I'm thinking of them that way and I'm not. It's just... Not who I am in such a deep, visceral way that I don't even look at myself anymore. I avoid my face in the mirror or reflective things, only looking at my eyes. I just don't want to know what I look like because it's so far from what I picture and want.

Trust me, I love people with weird and complicated genders. That's just not how I feel comfortable presenting. I wish my gender presentation was one where I could wear a dress with a beard and hairy legs because I think that's such a badass look, but that's just not me.

Rarely there are days where I own it and feel comfortable in it, but they're so rare. I'd honestly be more comfortable being dysphoric about my... Gendered traits from birth than from my T results. I hold on tight to the thought that maybe top surgery will help? Maybe if I'm more aligned to one binary gender then it'll feel less uncomfortable even if the gender itself isn't always the right one?

If I could do it all over I would never start it. But I can't and I'm here. I feel like I'm betraying the trans community for my thoughts too, like I'm a bad person because I can't just own being gender weird and out about it. But my gender presentation is very specifically binary, not both or something in between.

The only thing that makes me feel okay is that some people think I'm attractive. Maybe if I'm more involved in queer communities IRL it'll help? To see more people like me? But I feel like it won't help that the way I look is not me. It's not any of us, it's like a stranger.

Sometimes I tell myself "maybe it's bc I'm a bottom and bottoms are generally clean shaven and smooth" but like. I know that's not true! Bottoms can have hair! I don't feel like any less of a bottom! I instead feel soul-deep, identity-based dysphoria about it. It's barely even about gender most of the time and is more about how "that's not how I want my face to look!" Yet I can do nothing to change it at this point.

And did I mention it's PAINFUL? I shaved less than 12 hours ago and I'm in sensory hell feeling the stubble starting to come in under the surface. The texture of my skin will never be the way I want it to. Where my facial hair is has grown less sensitive, less soft. Touching it, the sensation it receives is unpleasant and it's so tender after shaving.

I think I really should have taken into account that I didn't want any secondary sex characteristics. No beard, no tits, nothing. That's my Ideal to feel more comfortable. I would do anything to undo this. I was so focused on following the traditional transition route I didn't think about my individual needs.

Sort of related, but lately I'm even less hateful of my dead name, some of us love it in fact! I had system members considering using it, almost going so far as to request people close to me use it for someone, but trans allies try to hate your dead name for you so I just couldn't. I lost that to testosterone too I guess.

I'm not a woman, but I wish I'd done more soul searching to realize I'm not a man either and that rejecting femininity so hard would backfire and force me towards masculinity. Which isn't better or less dysphoric actually!

I'm just so unhappy about my transition and it feels transphobic to express that even if it's MY BODY and MY GENDER. I feel so trapped in this body I hate more and more with each time I have to shave.

[mogwai-movie-house]

Hello! I would like to ask two questions, actually.

From what I can judge, you seem to enjoy watching and reviewing movies. Do you also watch TV series sometimes and if yes, what are the ones you would say are genuinely worth watching? (except Succession, and I also know that shows like Mad Men, Sopranos and the Wire are considered to be some of the prime TV examples.)

What are your favorite old Hollywood classics?

Thank you!

Howdy,

I can see from looking at your blog that you like Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, and I really can't think of any better-realized shows than those. Their creators really stuck the landing and told a perfect, clear story from the beginning to the end, which is where most other shows seem to fall down: the first 4 seasons of Game of Thrones might be the best TV show ever made, but the last 2 or 3 might be the very worst; the same goes for Rick & Morty (first 4 seasons perfect, last couple a disaster). The Simpsons was the best show on TV for the first 13 or so seasons, but has been a dull and unfunny walking corpse of its former self for over two decades now, which is terrible to see. South Park was at the very peak of human achievement in that medium for over 20 years, but then hit a very tiresome and uneven patch a few years back and hasn't really recovered, though it's always worth a look. The first 3 seasons of Arrested Development are perfection; the last two are dismal. The first season of True Detective is mostly excellent; the rest just get worse and worse. So decline in quality is probably the greatest issue with even the greatest shows, particularly in America, where the makers tend to view a hit show as a cash cow they can keep on milking until it dies, rather than a story needing telling with a beginning, middle and end, like a good film or a book.

I never really clicked with Mad Men: I had an ex-girlfriend who was hooked on it, and I tried to watch a couple of episodes with her, but I just couldn't connect. I could see that it did a nice job of recreating the physical details of the era in which it was set, but was completely anachronistic in its depiction of the people, their words, actions and motivations, none of which seemed at all real to me, and all clearly in the service of creating some very clumsy feminist strawmen to attack, while also perversely reveling in it. In some ways it seemed to me a test run for The Handmaid's Tale (or 50 Shades of Grey); a fetishization of real-or-imagined female victimhood, consumed overwhelmingly by women who found a strange mix of pleasure in the pretty clothes and smartly dressed aloof, boorish and powerful men they delight in hating but secretly want to bang. I can see some people must have felt they found more than that in it, but I just don't seem to be the audience for it.

My favourite shows in recent years have been Inside No. 9, Rick & Morty and Black Mirror, though the quality of all of them has become much more patchy. Get Shorty is not at that level but very enjoyable. Curb Your Enthusiasm has remained consistently slight but fun. The White Lotus and Enlightened are both good.

Further back I would list Extras, The Office (the original UK show) and Life's Too Short, all perfectly realized from start to end. Same goes for Spaced, Father Ted and I'm Alan Partridge. Northern Exposure and Buffy The Vampire Slayer are both wondrous and unique, though the last season of each goes downhill. I loved Community (first 3 seasons) and Louie. Then obviously things like the original Twilight Zone and Star Trek. I really enjoyed Lena Dunham's Girls, too, though I haven't gone back to rewatch it.

There are too many great films from the past to list, but if I were to try recommend some of the classics to people unfamiliar with anything before their own schooldays, off the top of my head I would probably say Sunset Blvd (1950), The Third Man (1949), The Night Of The Hunter (1955), His Girl Friday (1940), It Happened One Night (1934), The Ladykillers (1955), North by Northwest (1959), Le Plaisir (1952), The Kid (1921), The Gold Rush (1925), City Lights (1930), The Last Command (1928), and Black Narcissus (1947). All of them are strikingly original and perfectly-realized stories that satisfy in a way all films should but almost all present-day films are incapable of doing.

[mzsupernova203]

My letter to you.

Good morning love. I think you may think I’m crazy by now. I’m really not. You may think I’m being too clingy or just a lot to handle but I’m not really. You see, I just never felt this type of way for anyone and I just don't know what to say or how to say it or even how to act. My emotions are so strong at times that they get the best of me. I know you have alot to process about me based off of what I been writing but in person I’m just a totally different person.I just need the chance to show you. Im not a jealous person unless you give me a reason to be. I am very trusting,very loyal,very flexible, I am not the controlling type, I am humble and would give you the space you need when needed.I wouldn't have any issues with you hanging out with the guys or going out because guys need time too. I am not the type to call you a hundred times a day. I am very nurturing, very affectionate, very grounded. But also very passionate about things too. I’m an ambivert. I'm not the type that likes to go out but once in a blue just to blow off some steam. I'm a homebody. I like Netflix and chill type of days over going out. I like movie nights at home and game nights too. I take a lot on; TOO much sometimes, I always want to do for everyone.But that’s just me. I am very generous but to the right people. I am thoughtful and love the small things over big extravagant things because it’s the thought that counts. I give a lot, like randomly giving gifts because that’s MY love language. I am very chatty and love to have conversations but then some days I don’t talk at all. I am goofy and fun loving, child like, joke around type. I love pranks I love being silly. I love to laugh. Especially with the kids. I am a mom before anything. I love to dance, to sing, to cook, to help people who need it. I am adventurous and daring. I love nature, and car rides to no where. I love doing random things. I have a love/hate relationship with planning things out. It stresses me.😖I love food! 😂 I love music. I hate conflicts and fighting, I don’t start trouble. I worry a lot and always need to be self assured. And if you’re having a bad day I would lift you back up and make you feel better. I’m good like that. I am no psychic, so I DONT know when you are feeling a certain way and you would need to communicate and make things crystal clear to me. I always need clarity. Otherwise my mind would run on a thousand, like it is right now.

I don’t ask for much, just love and respect and loyalty. I’m a really good person I would take care of you I wouldn’t care if you didn’t have a job or you were homeless or didn’t have a car or have the finer things. Those type of things don’t matter to me. I am a very independent person and don’t need anything. I don’t expect gifts at all or anything for that matter. Im not the type of person that cares about looks or how people dress. As well as what people think about me for that matter,I could care less. As long as you treat me right and you have an awesome personality is what matters to me.( And by the way you are the sexiest man I know and that’s a fucking FACT!!) I would definitely remind of that and show you for the rest of your life. I would be your hype man. I would support you in anything you want to do and only make you more confident. But I also would let you know if things aren’t right or a bad idea. I give my opinions. I also want to be taken care of too.. but most of the times I’m self sufficient. On my sick days it would be nice if someone took care of me. I have never had that. I deserve it. To be babied. But most of all I’m the type of person with a big heart. And a lot of love to give, but to the right person who deserves to be love. I’m tired of being a second opinion because I should be the first. I’m not a perfect person at all, because I have many flaws and insecurities but for the most part I’m very confident. There’s so much more that I could say but that would be left for you to find out. So I want to just tell you that I love you so much and I know things happen so fast but I do, I don’t know how and I don’t know why but I do. And I don’t want you to lose me. I’m rooting for you.I know that sounds very cocky( trust me I’m not at all) but I just want you to be the one. Now I don’t know if you feel the same but if you do it would be a good idea to let me know so that I have a reason to stick around. Because you are it for me. I see a future so bright with you. I can picture a blended family with a lot of love and blessings. You are perfect for me in every way. I don’t care what you say is wrong with you. I accept you because of who you are. And people that love other people do that. I’m patient for the most part. Especially when things are clear to me. Now if you don’t feel that way and just see me as a friend and want to work things out with her let me know that too. Don’t be afraid to let me down. Don’t be afraid to tell me or hurt me, because not telling would be worse and lying about it would hurt me even more than not saying anything at all. I don’t want to be lead on. I don’t deserve that either. I deserve much more than that because despite everything I think I’m a great catch. (This is my confidence speaking). So I hope this helps you figure things out a little better. I’m very transparent about things so if you have any questions or there is anything else you want to know just ask. And be open to my responses. I wanna move forward with you with openness, no lies only truth. With a new start and start off on the right foot to building a solid foundation with you. Even if we need to start off as friends it better than not having you at all.

And now your gone🙏🏻🪽

[its-our-paris]

Hey Anna, you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, but how do you talk to your kids about gender identity? I live in the states, and even though I am not a mom, I have 3 nieces. I consider myself a progressive individual, and like to keep an open mind and understand the shift in cultural awareness regarding identity. I’m heterosexual by the way, but have never had a problem with people who identify as bisexual, gay, trans, etc. But boy, people here in the states are so close minded about this issue and insist kids shouldn’t be exposed to notions of gender identity and just completely oppose talking to kids about it. There are laws being passed targeting the lgbtq community, which is just, ughhh, so sad because they are doing nothing wrong. How do you as a mom approach this subject? I want to teach my nieces empathy, and that they shouldn’t judge or hate on people just because they don’t conform to what society wants them to be. But how do I do that tactfully? Thoughts?

Hey! Happy to answer.

To be honest, I/we approach gender identity just the same as questions about sex and sexuality. When my kids have questions, I answer them in a way that a child their age can understand.

I remember that when Erik, my older son, was around 7, he once said to me: "Mummy, I wish people could be half boy and half girl."

So that was a good moment for me to say: "Hey, there are actually people like that, who feel neither like a boy nor like a girl. They're a bit of both, or neither."

There was also a kid in summer camp last year who was using she/they pronouns in English, and their mother specifically told us (I was one of the drama teachers at camp) that their kid was feeling quite gender neutral and wanted their name (they wanted to be called Alex instead of Rocio) to reflect that. Again, it was a good moment to explain to my kids that sometimes people feel that way.

I never really sit my kids down and heap information about gender Identity or sexuality on them. Not at all. I just answer questions honestly. It all comes from conversations like ‘Does my drama teacher Javi have a girlfriend?’ ‘No, he has a boyfriend because he is gay, that means he likes to be romantic with boys and not girls.’

So far, my kids don't seem confused by any of it. I love that they say things like "I'm going to dress up as (male character), I don't think I like (female character’s) dress that much" because to them there is no other reason to not like a 'girl' costume other than the dress isn't that nice and the option to dress up as a female heroine is automatically on the table.

I've also always made sure, because this is important to me personally, that they understand that being a boy and feeling like a boy doesn't mean they cannot enjoy and express 'feminine' things. They paint their nails and have long hair and sometimes wear necklaces and glitter skirts, and they know that is a normal thing for boys to also want to do.

I think my main objective is just to raise children who are not afraid to express themselves however they want to, and who understand that others are free to do the same.

So far, so good. 😅

[pretendingday]

"I was quick to want the world rid of its fools an hour ago, I forget sometimes how much an exemplar I am among them." "That’s not how I see you."

A fanmix about James Fitzjames and Francis Crozier from AMC’s The Terror. Chronological and mostly canon compliant.

Listen on Spotify

Keep reading for songs and motivations.

1. All The Old Showstoppers - The New Pornographers

"When John he saw the numbers he lied, made up the whole thing, failed when he tried" This song is about responsibility, good intentions, and failure. It feels like a good place to start. Also, (Sir) John sure did fail when he tried.

2. Get Famous - The Mountain Goats

"You’ve been waiting for this, ever since you’ve been young, be careful not to choke on your tongue" This song will always be JFJ's theme song to me. The tone of it also fits in with the "tell us about bird shit island, why don't you, James" energy.

3. French Exit - The Antlers

"I’m not a puppy you take home, don’t bother trying to fix my heart" Now, this one is about fighting. It's about the "there hasn't been a single meal we've shared, a single conversation, when you weren't morbing on about what you're due." It's about the "keep your pity."

4. Victorian Ice - Sea Power

"And you better keep moving before you get totally cold" They're victorians, on ice. That's all the motivation you need. Also the song is about communication issues and needing each other, so... I rest my case.

5. Not Dead Yet - Lord Huron

"You’re tired of me, I’m tired of you" This song is about self-hatred and alcoholism. But it's also about not being dead yet, so there's... hope? Maybe?

6. The Counterfeiter - Crooked Fingers

"You don’t belong here, your heart’s a fake, the ghosts who chose you were mistaken" James has imposter syndrome, part one.

7. Someone You’d Admire - Fleet Foxes

"One of them wants only to be someone you’d admire, one would as soon just throw you on the fire" Sometimes it's hard to change, and even harder to know whether you want to impress someone, or still hate their guts. I feel like this goes for both of them.

8. Straight and Tall - Iron & Wine

"Don’t tell me all the shit you’ve done, how you push your luck with everyone, ‘cause your mean upbringing’s left you a mess" James has imposter syndrome, part two, but this time Francis goes "that's not how I see you".

9. Your Rocky Spine - Great Lake Swimmers

"I was moving across your frozen veneer, the sky was dark but you were clear" Listen, it's about the metaphors. I can't explain it to you, it's just the vibes.

10. I’ll Be Your Girl - The Decemberists

"I could be your man, but I’d be that much more" It's gender time. Reading way too much into the dress scene is something that can be so personal.

11. After Those Who Mean It - Laura Stevenson

"It’s as if you knew me, and even though it’s briefly, and though it’s not completely, I can feel you reading, reading me to sleep" This song is about persevering, even though you know it's all coming to an end. It's sad hours, and I'm afraid it's all downhill from here.

12. Colder Heavens - Blanco White

"Here I stand undressed, here I confess my doubt, did you know that I would?" The mortifying ordeal of being known, and also being hunted by a monster bear, and also there's a mutiny. That's not what the song is actually about, but it has the vibes.

13. Lucky Man - Emerson, Lake & Palmer

"He went to fight wars for his country and king, of his honour and his glory the people would sing" Something something "there will be poems". This song is the poem.

14. I Will - Mitski

"And while you sleep I’ll be scared, so by the time you wake I’ll be brave" I feel like I don't have to explain myself with this one, but I do have tissues if you need them. I did warn you it's sad hours.

15. The Pugilist - Keaton Henson

"But the truth is I need you to tell me I’m worthy of all this great living that I’ve been doing" James has imposter syndrome, part three, but now he's also dying.

16. Artifact #1 - Conor Oberst

"The world is full of missing persons, all of these unsolved mysteries" James is still dying. Francis is feeling... not great about it.

17. Genesis 30:3 - The Mountain Goats

"I will do what you ask me to do, because of how I feel about you" This is the song that made me start this fanmix. Imagine someone you love asking you to kill them. Imagine being unable to deny them anything. Remember when I said you could have my tissues? I take it back, I need them myself now, thanks.

18. Another New World - Josh Ritter

"I won’t call it rescue what brought me here back to the old world to drink and decline, and to pretend that the search for another new world was well worth the burning of mine" This song is about an arctic explorer surviving, but at much too great a cost. Perfect theme song for Final Girl Francis. It's also extremely long, so you have time to get all those tears out before moving on with your life. Thank you for listening.

[imthebadguyyy]

maybe something like interviewer asking her sexist questions and the boys stand up for her , after that interview she feels insecure and the boys comfort her . that's just an idea you don't have to write it !! <33

I hope you like it, and I'm so sorry about the delay 😭 I couldn't find my footing with this one, and I hope it's what you wanted ! Have a lovely day 💙

The One Where They're There For Her

Pairing - One Direction x Reader (6thmember!female!reader)

Fandom - One Direction (Directioners)

Summary - A particularly sexist interview decides to reduce you to just a sexual being and makes no effort to hide his misogyny. But the boys are there to support you.

Warnings - sexualization of the lgbt community, sexist comments, swearing, (honestly I hated myself for writing some of the comments here,and I'm so sorry)

Being a part of the biggest band in the world comes with certain responsibilities. Not responsibilities that come along with signing a recording contract, but those that a person deems themselves responsible for. For example, as the only female in a boyband, a female with a fanbase as large as yours, you took it upon yourself to always stand up for what's right, and to be an ally for the causes close to your heart.

That meant that your social media was often flooded with information about important causes, or your opinions on issues like feminism. Was it always well received? Heck no. There were people filled your feed with hate and comments calling you the most horrible names and labelling you a 'man hater' and a 'bitch' But you didn't let it get to you. On most days. On days like today, it was all you could do to keep it together. It had been a tiring few days, touring, recording, performing and doing an endless amount of interviews and photoshoots. It was safe to say you were on the last of your nerves, having battled your way through a makeup artist who had insisted on pointing out your flaws and had used a shit ton of makeup to cover them up. You had battled a photographer who had not hesitated to tell you that if you didn't look more feminine people would think you were turning into a man.

Before you could retaliate, Paul had dragged him away and told management to cancel the photoshoot, and find another photographer before grabbing the six of you some sandwiches and had let you all go back for a quick power nap at the hotel. Then in about half an hour he had woken you up, to get you ready for another interview. That's how you were here, in a white jumpsuit and a black blazer jacket, paired with black heels. Another day, another interviewer that got on your nerves. But this one, this one was different. This interviewer was different, but also the same. Another misogynistic man who thought he was entitled to stare at your ass and cleavage, and eye fuck you as you settled into a seat in between Niall and Zayn.

Settling in, you crossed one knee over the other, plastering a fake smile onto your face, as the man leaned back in his chair, throwing you a sleazy smirk. Noticing the look, Zayn shifted so you were out of view of the interviewer, but in view of the audience. It was in moments like this that you were a 100× more grateful to have your boys. They were well aware of how sleazy some interviewers could be, having had plenty of experience with them, and Zayn and Louis in particular were very protective about the way you were treated. Squeezing your thigh softly, he leaned back a little, lips settling into a thin line as he looked at the interviewer with a cold look. A little behind, Louis threw the interviewer a dirty look.

"So, One Direction! Congratulations on the album, as you all know its out on November the 22nd, with eighteen new songs, including the singles Night Changes and Steal My Girl Speaking of stealing girls, do you think I could steal your number Y/N? And may I mention, you look ver, very hot in that outfit" The interviewer joked, throwing you what he thought was a sexy smirk. (P.S - it wasn't) Answering with an awkward laugh, you shook your head, as Niall tensed up beside you. "Aww come on, your'e a pretty girl, I'm a handsome guy, let's go out sometime" he pressed on, ignoring the growing anger in Harry's eyes. "That's umm, nice. But no thanks, I'm not going to go out with you" was your answer, as you pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. Picking up on your nervous tic, Zayn moved his hand to rest on your knee, stopping it from bouncing up and down.

"Aww come on baby, what is it? You like girls or something? Because I wouldn't mind being a part of that action either" the sleazebag chuckled, ignoring the disgusted look Liam sent his way. "That's rude" Liam said, while Zayn tightened his grip on your knee. "Oh come on lads, are you telling me the idea doesn't appeal to you? Two women together, mm, makes me all excited just thinking about it, especially if one of them's Y/N" That comment was all it took for Louis to stand up, turning to the man and saying in a voice much rougher than his usual voice, "Alright, that's fuckin' enough, what the fuck is actually wrong with you?" he was backed up by Liam, who stood up, going to tower over the interviewer, whose eyes had lost some of the sleazy look in them. "All you've done since we walked in here is make those disgusting comments about Y/N, and it's sickening. Have some fucking respect" he practically spat.

Behind him, Zayn took your hand in his and pulled you to your feet, noticing the slight glossiness in them, leading you back to the dressing rooms, while Niall, Liam, Louis and Harry stayed back to continue to snap at the interviewer. "That is no way to treat a woman, and not only are you disrespecting her, you also made those god awful events about seeing women together. Your'e a shame to every single person in this room by talking like that" Harry continued, glancing over his shoulder to check if you were okay.

"And no, it doesn't excite us, because we are not assholes, and you are, a disgusting sleaze who does not deserve the job he has. Fuckin loser" Niall chimed in, standing up and storming out. Louis stood up as well, turning to directly face the cameras and the cameramen and sound technicians, who had all looked shocked when the man had made his comments towards you. "I sure as hell hope you have that on record, so you can see just how fucking sexist this industry is to women. Y/N does the same job as us, works just as hard and has the same number of awards, nominations, and records and yet you decide to only focus on her body, clothes, love life and sexuality. Get a fucking life" he spat at the camera, before walking away himself, eventually followed by Harry and Liam, who apologized to the outraged fans before leaving themselves. As they made their way to the dressing rooms they could hear the audience telling the interviewer to apologize to you, their anger at the way you were treated echoing through the building.

Walking in, Harry caught sigh of you curled up in one of the armchairs, with Louis sitting beside you, while Niall and Zayn talked to a furious Paul. "He had no damn right to treat her like shite, and you need to make sure that he knows those comments were un-fuckin-acceptable" Niall was saying, looking angrier than Harry had ever seen him. "And to make those sickening comments about wanting to get action? Can't we sue him for something?" Was Zayn's reply, glancing over his shoulder at you to make sure you were still okay. "We can't sue him, atleast I don't think we can, but I'll have someone let the smug bastard know that he needs to learn how to respect a woman" Paul said, before leaving the room to give the six of you some time together before you had to head back to the hotel.

"How're you feeling darling?" Louis said, moving over and patting your knee so you moved. "I'm okay" you mumbled back, letting Louis settle in next to you, leaning back to rest on his chest. "He had no fuckin right to say any of that, and don't you let it trouble you for a second" Zayn added, pouring out a cup of tea for you and for Louis and Harry. "I don't care about what he said, I couldn't care less, but it was just so frustrating, sitting there and listening to him just sexualize a whole community of people. You've got to be in a really sad place to think of shit like that. That's what annoyed me. You think I give a damn about what he said about my clothes or wanting to take me out on a date? It was the way he was talking, like he was sure any woman would be glad to have him that irked me. He's really tiresome" was your reply, as you reached forward for a sip of your tea. "That's the right attitude love. Haters gonna hate" Harry said.

"I know that. But I just wish I could punch him once, which sounds mean, but he does kind of deserve it" Niall said, earning a laugh from you. Niall was never usually aggressive, and even now, he wasn't particularly rude but it was rare to see him wanting to punch someone. "It's okay Niall, you don't have to. I can do it myself, but I won't" you replied, leaning up to squeeze his hand. "Besides, Ni, if you went and punched him, I'd do it too, and then we'd all go to jail" Liam chimed in, scrolling through his twitter. "Twitter isn't happy either babe. #stopsexualization and #Y/Ndeservesbetter is trending already" he added, showing you his phone. "If it means some of these sexist asses get their heads out of the sand, I'm happy. But I dont want to to think about it now" you replied, cuddling closer to the warmth radiating from Louis's body.

"Okay, we won't talk about it. Do you want to go back to the hotel?" Harry asked, standing up and walking to the door "No I want to go to Nando's. Anybody else hungry?" You asked, to nods of assent from the boys. "I'm starving. Those stupid sandwiches didn't fill me up at all" Zayn said, standing up to grab his coat and wallet. "I know and I'm craving some hot Peri Peri chicken with some fries. Do you think they'd let me put the lemon and herb sauce on the fries?" You asked, standing up yourself, earning a laugh from Louis. "Your'e an international superstar babe, I think they'd give you some lemon herb sauce" Liam joked.

Laughing, the six of you made your way to the car, with Harry and Niall squishing you in between them, as Louis sat in the back with Liam, and Zayn sat in the front with Paul (he was driving thank GOD) "I'm proud of you darling" Harry chimed in suddenly. "I am too" Niall added. "You know I am" Louis said, before Liam added "Always babe" and Zayn turned to smile at you before adding, "We are all proud of you, and we always will be, not only because you do a damn good job of not listening to the haters, but because you do what you think is right" "Awh come on, your'e gonna make me cry" you mumbled, leaning into Niall's shoulder. "Almost makes me feel bad for teasing you about having an extremely low spice tolerance the last time we were at Nando's Haz" you smirked, earning a roar of laughter from the boys.

"That chicken was spicy love!" "It was lemon and herb with no peri peri!" "And it was spicy!"

And just like that, you were back to messing around with each other. Sleazy interviewers would come and go, but your boys were always there to support you. Always.

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A/N - Thanks for reading ! I'd also like to apologize on the behalf of this fictitious interviewer I made up, I felt so bad while writing some of this 😭 anyways, I hope this is what you wanted! Enjoy !

Tags - @zaynkissbot @gucci-hazza @bxtchboy69

[hatteymcstache]

Another callout post in the air.

I've been told about this post going around when someone was asking me if I was okay; so I've given into a lot of thought and I'm here explain. again. I will not display this person's name because I know the toxic part of my community will go ballistic and I hate that so much. Please don't.

The callout post in question:

Firstly, those who have tried went from being calm to immediately hostile when I tried to explain myself in dms. And the very rare few who reached out to me apologized for jumping to conclusions. You on the other hand, never tried reaching out to me once. If it's a confrontation in the discord server, then I'm not active in it and most likely forget. If it's a personal dm, I didn't get anything recent from you at all.

1. I did not defend C0nji. yes I do look at the whole anti/proshipping issue on both sides, doesn't mean I condone malicious creepy intent and doxxing/death threats. I'm just saying this artist is not a despicable person as far as I know, nor did they go out of their way of legitimately hurting others. With that being said, their whole idea of 'fiction doesn't affect reality' is very shallow-minded and gross considering how much it has put minors in danger, and they should learn to think about it but that's their choice, and problem. I'm not here to babysit.

2. The same claim I already debunked many times but will say again: I carelessly copy pasted old info and had no idea that word was still there but I removed the term 'Asperger's' and have stopped using it since, I was made aware of this years ago already. At the time I wasn't aware that in a deep negative history, and I've been around a few autistic mutuals who used that term as a scientific term.

3. Another of the same claim: Yes I do see Chihiro as a boy (or sometimes non-binary) cause as a trans man, it brings me comfort to see guys in a skirt with confidence. I'm not the most feminine guy but i'd like to have the freedom to explore without being misgendered. And if people do not like trans Sakura that's understandable, I just want to shed some light where trans woman can look buff, especially those who are as athletic as Sakura. The trans post you showed is meant to be a body positive for pre-op and post-op trans folk but you decided to flip it around and call it something else.

4. Me being genuinely upset of people making claims towards me doesn't automatically mean I've brushed off every transfem's concerns. Some of them who came forward to me, the conversations went from civil to being aggressive because they wouldn't listen or even consider my explanation that my intentions weren't malicious at all. Then the only trans woman who was civil came to me with fair criticism, told me I should be more specific with my content warnings when it comes to drawing pre-op bodies cause it would cause dysphoria for certain trans people, especially to trans women. That was where I listened and assured to be more cautious with how I portray my work.

5. The rest about me woobifying Taka and Gundham which I've addressed many times; characters dressing up in oversized sweaters or acting childlike/naïve doesn't automatically make them incapable or infant. That is never what I intend. And Gundham 'not knowing what sex is'- yes I know he's a breeder, human intercourse is a similar but different thing. He's asking Mondo in his own way because he has lacked connection with people for a long time; that's how I'm portraying, this also has been implied many times in his free time events and with how he talks to people. This is something where I relate to Gundham cause all I had was my art and imagination as a kid, so learning to interact with others is overwhelming.

I also don't understand that apparently Gundham needing people like Taka and Mondo (as dad-like figures) is so terrible- I'll say this now that yes I do portray Gundham as someone who is headstrong but he can feel very lonesome, he just doesn't how to express it. It's okay to need someone who truly accepts you or is that so wrong? Also it was never portrayed that Gundham or Taka need to reply on someone 24/7. so I really don't understand that argument you're trying to make. To me, It just sounds like autistic people shouldn't rely or need anyone at all cause it's offensive. If that's not what you mean I'm sorry, but that's what I'm perceiving cause all your statements are vague.

I not only do research but have talked to autistic mutuals/followers when developing my character Timmy; a lot of the valid criticism comes from how I should write his symptoms, showing both his mature and child-like sides etc, they even share their own experiences so I can illustrate them in a realistic and positive light. The way he's portrayed and capable of many things has made him relatable to a lot of people, which is something I'm trying to strive for; especially when some autistic people (who shared their experiences in my dms) behave like Timmy get ridiculed for ''''acting like 9 year olds'''' in my comment section which is something I never condone in my community I even made a comic post regarding that ableism.

No one is ever obligated to agree with the way I portray my stories and opinions; if someone doesn't like what I'm doing they are free to unfollow, block me and look for any other artist that does a better job in their art. My biggest issue with callout posts like this, is that people have different opinions of what makes a character a good or bad rep. It's very subjective and it depends on every person. Half of them including you do not like my representation, meanwhile the other half does enjoy my work, even find comfort in it. I'm not here to please every single person who didn't get everything they need from my work, I'm one man.

But the most painful part is not debunking these claims over and over; it's when my followers believe them right away without even asking me if they were true. It always leaves me unsurprised but disappointed. And yeah I'm not a good person, yes people tend to get scared of me that's fair, but I'm not as despicable as so many of these callout posts claim. I have talked to certain followers who have the decency to ask me what's going on; followers who actually listened to my explanation, and I listened to them back when they have questions. You don't even have to agree or like me after my explanation, just have the courtesy to ask before jumping to conclusions.

So yeah, the callout post is vague, and blown a lot of things I drew out of proportion and turned them into malicious intent which was never my approach. I was going to personally dm you about this but you have lost it the moment you made an 'awareness' post instead that does more damage than good. Feel free to keep your post up, feel free to think what you will. I just want to say all this to people who are genuinely confused. Whatever you plan to do, go ahead. I'm exhausted and have more in life to worry about. Unless followers genuinely want to ask questions to know more, this will be last time I confront the same. claims.