#sometimes I hate how masculine I am

[wow-an-unfunny-joke]

My gender is weird, being genderfluid is weird, if I had a single say in this I would’ve picked something easier for me to wrap my head around

[the-yearning-astronaut]

I wish I could be agender the way Murderbot is agender. Right down to the lack of biological sexual characteristics. So agender that the term agender comes with too much associated gender to accurately apply. You know what I mean?

[nanowired-lover]

im pretty sure some transmasc ppl can relate and said already but i want my gender to be ''male crossdressing presenting''. I want ppl to look at me and be lile ''this is a GUY, a MAN, a DUDE and he wears things like a woman but when he tells you he's a guy you know he is." I want to look hyper fem and hyper masc. I want to change between a bubbly emotional lil angry dude and your sweet tranvestite.

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

Sorry. I meant cis ted.  I would never baby girls transman that would be offensive.

???? yeah i mean. i kind of figured you probably meant cis ted, i was saying I got distracted on the topic of feminization kink. also i mean. yeah it CAN be offensive but i was talking about how me, as a trans man, enjoys feminization kink on a trans male/transmasc character (in this case trent, sorry) bc i project a lot😩 and it's fun specifically because of the inherent contradictory na--i mean i did explain this? didn't i? i. sorry??

[yuribalisms]

Lesbian or trans guy…. Lesbian or trans guy… lesbian or trans guy…. That is The question

[gor3sigil]

Before starting T, when I socially transitionned, I was surrounded by radical feminists who saw masculinity as gross and inherently evil, something to avoid, something to make fun of, something to destroy. The other transmascs in my friend group, sometimes, told me that they didn’t knew if they really were non-binary or if they just were scared shitless of saying “I am a man”. Because they saw this as a betrayal to their younger self who had been SAd and abused.

I saw many of my masc friends and trans men around me hate themselves, not outing themselves as men because it would imply so so much, it was like opening the Pandora Box. Even when we were just together, talking about our masculinity was always coated with bits like “I know we’re the privileged ones but…”, “I don’t want to sound like I have it bad but…”, “Women obviously have it worse, but last time…” and we were talking about terrible traumas we experienced while taking all the precautions in the world in the case the walls were a crowd of people in disguise waiting to get us if we didn’t downplay the violence we faced, or like crying and being upset and being traumatized and afraid and scared and to say it out loud would make us throw up the needles we were forced to swallow every second of every day living in our skin.

Most of us weren’t on T yet, some of us were catcalled every day and harassed in the streets or in abusive relationships nobody seemed to care to help them get out of because they were “strong enough” to do it by themselves.

I was using the gender swap face app and cried for ours when I saw my father looking back at me through the screen. The idea of transforming, of shedding into a body that would deprive me of love, tenderness, and safety, was absolutely terrifying. I knew I couldn’t stay in this body any longer because it wasn’t mine, but I also knew that if I was going to look like my dad, my brother, my abusers, it would be so much worse.

5 years later and I’m almost 2 years on T, and almost 2 months post top surgery.

I ditched my previous group of friends. I was bullied out of my local trans community. But let me tell you how free I am.

I was scared that T would break my singing voice: it made it sound more alive than ever.

I was scared that T would make me less attractive: it made me find myself hot for the first time in my life.

I was scared that T would make me gain weight: it did. But the weight I put on is not the weight I used to put on by binging and eating my body until I forgot that it even existed. It’s the weight of my body belonging to me, little by little. The wolf hunger for life.

I won’t tell you the same story I see everywhere, the one that goes “I started going to the gym 8 times a week, I put on some muscles, I started a diet and now I look like an action film actor”, in fact if you took pictures of me from 5 years ago vs now I’d just have more acne, I’d have longer hair and still look like I don’t know what to do with myself when I take selfies.

But the sparkle in my eyes, my smile, tell the whole story way better than this long ass stream of words could ever.

I want to say some things that I wish someone told me before starting medically transitionning.

It’s okay to take your time. It’s your body, it’s your journey, if you don’t feel comfortable taking full doses and want to go slow, the only voice you need to listen to is your own. Do what feels right.

If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break, it’s okay to ask for support.

Trans people are holy. Everyone is. You didn’t lose your angel wings when you came out because you want to be masculine. You are not excluded from the joy of existence, from being proud of yourself, from being sad, from being scared, from being angry. The emotions and feelings you allowed yourself to feel while processing what you experienced when you grew up as a girl and was seen as a woman are still as valid as before. Nobody can take that from you. If someone tries to, don’t let them.

It’s perfectly normal to grieve some things you were and had before you started to transition, like your high soprano voice or even your chest. Hatching is painful. You can find comfort in things that don’t feel right, so making the decision to change can be incredibly scary and weird and you deserve to be heard and supported through this. Wanting top surgery doesn’t make the surgery less intense, less terrifying, less painful to recover from. When it becomes too much you have the right to take a break and take some deep breaths before going on.

You don’t have to have a radical, 180° change for your transition to be acceptable or valid or worthy of praise. Look at how far you’ve come already. It doesn’t have to show, you’re not made to be a spectacle, you’re human and it is your journey.

Oh, and last thing, you know when some people say “Oh this trans person has to grow out of the cringy phase where you think that you can write essays about being trans or transitionning or just their experience because it’s weird” ? If you ever hear this or see this online, remember all the people whose writing you read and, even if they were not professional writers, helped you more than any theorists did ? If you want to write, do it. It won’t be a waste. It can help people. Or it won’t, and even then, if it helped you, that’s enough.

Love every of my trans siblings, take care of yourselves. You deserve the world.

[justthoughtsandstuffblog]

Damn I meant to get on the Man Train™ to Man Town™ to go to Man Job™ today but somehow I accidentally got on the Dysphoria Train™ instead :/

[wistfulfag]

been thinking about goin by (chucky voice) genda fluid lately....

[genderqueerdykes]

thank you both for this, i was literally in the process of writing a post about this as i saw these.

i came out as bisexual when i was about 19 or 20 years old, in 2011 - 2012. this was such a difficult thing because everyone around me suddenly had very pointed opinions on me. suddenly i wasn't queer anymore, i was a straight person. i asked people why and they said well bisexual people are half straight, which makes you straight, which means gay people don't want to be around you. i was told nobody likes bisexuals because they're too straight to be gay and too gay to be straight

i had a literal personal dilemma because i didn't feel like that at all. when i was realizing i was bisexual i was realizing i was attracted to all genders in a queer way. i did NOT feel like my attraction to men, women or genderqueer people was straight in any way, shape or form. i've always fit in much better in both gay and lesbian circles. those have always been my home, and my community

in the early days of my transition, when "genderqueer" wasn't even remotely heard of, i had to try to transition into being a man to be seen as trans at all. i went from being forced into lesbian spaces to being forced into gay male spaces. nobody let me pick where i was existing. i was being pushed around. i liked both lesbian and gay male spaces, but i was being told when i could and couldn't occupy the spaces. and then when it came out i was bi everyone called me a traitor and said i was a straight person

my best friend at the time came with me to pride meetings and when her mom found out about that, and that i was bi, she told my friend she couldn't come to those pride meetings anymore, and that i was turning her daughter into a lesbian. her mother would not stop calling me a lesbian all throughout my life. from early childhood, she thought me and her daughter were dating because i was butch and she was femme and we were very close. her mom carried this belief into adulthood, asking her outright if we were lovers. her brother thought we were, too, and taunted us about it.

my own mom weaponized lesbianism against me. she hated how butch i was. she hated that i "looked and acted like a lesbian". she called me a butch and a bulldyke hatefully. she told me not to dress or look certain ways or else people would assume i, and her by some proxy, were lesbians. my mom was insanely butch so i don't really know why this was being leveraged against me but either way when i became a young adult and my mom was trying to force me to learn to drive (something i am terrified of doing due to having 2 dissociative disorders), she asked what kind of car i would ideally like. i said a truck. i was standing there in a purple plaid shirt and she just sighed and went "I knew you were a lesbian." she pointed out my shirt. she was weaponizing lesbophobic and butchphobic stereotypes against me, but either way, reinforcing that i was a lesbian in one capacity or another

i got so tired of my friends harassing me for saying that if i was bi that meant i was straight and i needed to stop calling myself gay because i wasn't, and that it was an "insult" to the gay community. note that nobody gave a singular flying fuck about the bisexual community at all. i was literally bullied out of identifying as bi, because my straight cishet male friends hated it, and my lesbian identifying GF was uncomfortable with it because it made me sound too straight.

the thing is, none of these people asked what being bisexual meant to me.

i actually liked the lesbian community a lot. i really love other lesbians. i have always been attracted to lesbian and butch identifying people for as long as i could remember. i loved seeing strong butch women on TV, even if there were rude jokes. i loved the idea of being a masculine person who is sometimes a queer masculine woman. i loved the idea of being with femmes, i loved queer women and people who took femininity to the next level. i also loved seeing gay men when and wherever they existed. i always felt like i fit right in, and like i was seeing a reflection of a part of myself i needed help discovering.

i have almost always, as long as i can remember, identified as a gay man, and a lesbian, at the same time. my attraction to men, women, and people of all genders is queer no matter what gender of mine is involved. it doesn't matter. i have never felt "half gay half straight" which is why people weaponizing heterosexuality against me as a bisexual forced me to strictly identify as a gay man for almost a decade. it was painful to ignore my butch lesbian side, and to stop identifying as gay, because people would criticize how attractive i found women, and other people

if people had let me exist and explain what bisexuality means to me, they could've understood that bisexual is an inherently deeply queer attraction no matter what genders are involved, but NOBODY cares to listen to the bisexual. everyone LOVES to speak for us because we're just "straight people invading the queer community."

we've had it. bisexuals are queer. even if they DO identify as "half straight" they're STILL queer. let bisexuals define bisexuality. there is no one size fits all form of bisexuality. every single bisexual defines it differently and that's the point. it's a very complex identity with many layers that often relate to gender and presentation as well as attraction.

let bisexuals define bisexuality.

[illnessfaker]

tw: black+trans death

from the_yvesdropper on instagram:

our beautiful black trans brother, 35 year old Righteous Torrence "Chevy" Hill, was murdered in Atlanta, GA this weekend.

he went by his nickname 'Chevy' he was originally from Macon, GA. he owned Evollusion, which is a black/ queer owned LGBTQ+ salon in Atlanta that provided and dedicated full service to specializing in hair, nails, barbering and makeup. growing up as young black queer boys/kids, the barbershop experience can sometimes be a tricky space to occupy, this was something that Chevy understood and wanted to cultivate a space of safety where you can also get the affirming look and style you want, and he did exactly that.

Chevy was a beloved son, brother, partner, and father.

one of his last posts that had a photo of himself said :

"if you truly know me, you know i am a humble, modest, private man, that i love my community, i have the love of God in me and will give the shirt off my back to any soul in need, also i never post pictures of myself, legaey give myself credit, that stops today, i am my legacy!"

(a close friend of Chevy asked if i could share more then one photo of Chevy, since he never posted photos of himself and in recent years he got the confidence to want to share more photos and now he won't get the chance to)

Chevy, hey king, hey brother, hey angel, thank you for everything, i lové you, we lové you, i'm so sorry. there are a lot of photographers in heaven who will be able to photograph you as the glorious black trans angel that you are.

there will be a homegoing service/memorial for our brother

there aren't many details about what happened but apparently he was shot by a family member last wednesday, the 28th (at least this article was the one linked in relation to his murder.)

judging by both the IG post and the comments section he was well-loved by many people and those people have many good memories with him and nothing but good things to say. this is a comment that was left by tirajmeansgolden which was hidden by IG for some reason:

I started testosterone in February 2020. I hit this man up at the end of 2019 after numerous Google searches for an LGBT-friendly barber near me (and by near me... he was a good 35-40 minutes from the rural area I was in outside of Atlanta: but when I found out he was a trans man and that his business was the first and only LGBT hair bar, I knew it would be worth the trip). I was a dysphoric mess in his DMs one Sunday. I hated how my hair was growing out. I never had a "masculine" hairstyle before but decided one day I would buzz it all off myself, then allowed it to grow out a bit... I sent him a video and despite him being closed on Sunday, he told me to come through. I got my hair braided and he gave me my first really masculine fade. Explained the different terms. Lined me up. Was asking me about my decision to transition and provided some helpful advice + guidance. I told him how I was a therapist and he was hype and said he talked with a group of trans men and he would love for me to stop by and also give some mental health tips. So whoever said he was humble - wow, what an understatement. Such a community man! Made me feel SO comfortable because barbershops were a source of major trauma and triggers for me. They were such an integral part of my early transition (I just celebrated 4 years later week). And he was such an integral part of the Atlanta Queer community with hosting events like Queer Con. How I found so many other great resources + queer businesses/artists. May you rest in peace, Chevy. You'll be missed. You've made such a different in the lives of countless people. You definitely were living your Purpose + left a legacy behind ...

[isaacthedruid]

(spoilers for the Barbie movie)

As a trans-masc non-binary person, I saw myself in Allan. I’m a boy but not a Ken, I'm Ken-like but not quite.

Allan’s role of being awkward, unsure and a little out of his element but still trying to help the Barbies through the chaos and events caused by the Kens, is how I feel as a trans-masc person who is still trying to advocate for women and discuss the issues they face.

I don't identify as a woman anymore but I still grew up as a girl, I lived as a young woman for 14 years, and people continue to be misogynistic towards me when they think I am one-- customers will talk to my male coworkers instead of me, when I’m the person with the answers

I wasn’t expecting to see myself, in terms of gender, in the character often described as Ken’s boyfriend, though it is said in a more playful, joking way rather than any attempt at representation. I’m gay and this version of Allan is definitely queer as well. Yet, that’s a separate story which has already been written, here’s an excellent article about that. [LINK]

Allan isn’t Ken, and he isn’t Barbie either. Allan is simply Allan, an idea with both masc and femme traits. He doesn’t fit into anything specific, he just is. Allan can wear Ken’s clothes but also Barbie’s pink jumpsuit-- but when he's not doing that undercover mission with the Barbies, we only ever see him wearing his own clothes. A set of clothes worn only by him, that iconic striped outfit that is signature to the real Allan doll.

Additionally, notice the horse patch on the front of his shirt, he never changed his clothes unlike the rest of the Kens when they discovered the patriarchy and a new version of masculinity, a toxic and destructive one. Allan only added something to his clothes to “fit in” or act as if he did, but he hated what the Kens did to Barbieland. He also wasn't brainwashed and never acted upon those destructive abilities that were laid out for him. He could've just joined the Kens and broke stuff and drank copious amounts of "brewskis" but he didn't.

Allan is different and it's constantly stated, "there's only one Allan" in this world of Kens (and Barbies).

I will never be Ken nor will I ever be a Barbie again, I’m not happy in either. I’ve tried both, neither is my style (or title). I wear Ken’s clothes as well as Barbie’s, and sometimes I wear Allan’s.

But, I like Allan’s clothes best, they fit me well.

[ivoovu]

*cough*

Mic Tap

A PSA to all König/Krueger writers:

Hello, I‘m Voov, and I‘m a native German.

And let me just clarify that I do not mean any of this in a offensive matter, and that none of these things are 'annoying' or 'bothersome' to me as a German, which I‘m sure other Germans would agree with me. This isn‘t something that‘s making it impossible for us to read blurbs/fics/etc., however I do know that some writers want to write in foreign languages as accurately and realistically as possible, so this is for those. And for everyone else who‘s just interested, of course

🤍🍪

1 - What I often read is "Exemplary Sentence I can‘t think of something right now but it‘s in English, ja?"

We don’t end our sentences with "[…], ja?". Sometimes, yes, fair, sometimes we do so, but it’s on the rarer side in my opinion. Majority of the time we use this at the end of our sentences:

"[…], nicht?" = "[…], no?" (please don‘t use "[…], nein?" for this one)

or:

"[…], nh?" = honestly this one can be used for a lot of things, it can be used for "[…], no?", "[…], don‘t you think so?" or how the Brits use 'innit', like you‘re trying to prove a point.

(Translation for "[…], don‘t you think so?" = "[…], denkst du nicht auch so?")

I understand that when you type in a "[…], ja?" you‘re translating from the words' English equivalent which is "[…], yeah?", but again, it‘s more common to use "[…], nicht?" instead.

If you use a good mix of "[…], ja?", "[…], nicht?" and "[…], nh?" (and any other word you might want to add to the end of your sentence) instead of sticking to one throughout an entire fic, you‘ll make us Germans a bit happier.

🍙⌛️

2- If you‘re using longer sentences, and the sentences are directed at the Reader, you should clarify beforehand if the Reader is masc or fem. Why? Because a lot of words are gendered in German, so the way they’re conjugated tell us the Gender of the Person:

English: "My perfect Partner."

-> Gender neutral, the reader could be a Man, Woman, in between, on the outside, an Alien race, whatever

If you type this into google translate you get: "Mein perfekter Partner."

-> Masculine. It‘s an instant tell that the reader is a dude.

The female version would be: "Meine perfekte Partnerin."

-> Now we know instantly that this is feminine.

There is no gender neutral, German simply isn’t a language that works that way.

Can you write full sentences without using anything gendered, at all? Yes, absolutely, here‘s an example:

English: "Oh God I love you, I don‘t know what I would do without you. You‘re my everything, I‘ll do anything and everything for you."

German: "Oh Gott ich liebe dich, ich weiß nicht was ich ohne dich machen würde. Du bist mein ein und alles, ich würde alles für dich tun."

This is completely gender neutral because while typing I actively made sure to avoid using anything gendered. But I understand that this is a extremely difficult task to do so for those who don’t speak German, so if you can pull it off, you just earned my highest form of respect, but this isn’t something that us Germans expect of you as a Writer, this is just something I wanted to draw your attention to.

🐰🧳

My point is: If you do any of those two, we Germans aren’t crying about it. We won‘t stop reading the fic, we won‘t bitch about it or send you hate-mail.

We just notice it, correct the sentence in our mind, and some of us will type out the correct sentence as a comment.

I sadly don‘t have any websites that can help with the gendered words, and google translate sucks anyways, so I truly don‘t have any type of direction I could point you writers to, sorry :/

But I have said this before and I‘ll say it again, as many times as I have to: I am absolutely willing to help with the German parts, my dm‘s are always open, no I won’t think you’re annoying or abusing anything by asking me to check the German sentences you might‘ve used in your works, no I‘m not saying any of this out of courtesy, no I‘m not lying, no we don’t have to know each other, no you don’t have to deal with chit chat you can immediately hit me up with 'Hey how is this sentence?', yes I am being serious. In doubt, read this paragraph again and again.

🐚🪵

[prettyboypistol]

TF2 Mercs x M!Reader || How the Mercs Jerk Off +18

minors dni and get blocked

ambiguous genitals for Pyro

Scout

The stereotypical setup of "makes a night of it" sometimes only to end up frantically fucking his fist 10 minutes later as he gasps out your name breathlessly.

Most of the time though his man is a horny mess. Sneaks off to jack off frequently (like 2/month).

Has jerked off in the showers before but prefers his bedroom to relieve himself.

HUUUGE on fantasies. Always talking to himself and imagining you in various ways. His favorite is imagining you blowing him.

Usually lasts a short amount of time, but can recover extremely quickly.

Pyro

Oh. My. God. This is the HORNIEST mf alive when they're lucid. Yeah, they're a little awkward about how close they get to you, but everyone shrugs it off as them being socially unaware.

You smell so amazing to them, the smell of you looks so pretty to them in their head because of their synesthesia. Has embarrassingly gotten off to the colors and feeling of your voice and smell.

Your voice is a calming purple to them with a gentle rumbling against the bottom of their mind, the sound feels a sort of comfortable chilling ironically.

They refuse to do anything outside of their safe space- hell, considering that nobody even knows if Pyro needs to jerk off-

It HAS to be: right vibes, 3 am, locked door, calming smell candles, windows shut, etc etc

Soldier

Has a love/hate relationship with jerking off, he sees it as manly and masculine to release urges, but also weak to indulge himself in base desires.

A manly man thinking of another manly man like yourself? Well technically that's twice the amount of men. At first he assumed he was jealous of your physique, but then he drempt of you on top of him right about to push your-BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEEEEEP 0600 SOLDIER TIME TO WORK

Awkward boners are his specialty, excusing himself to "go oversee the maggots" when you flex a particularily nice deadlift.

Less private than Pyro but still prefers a more private setting like in the woods, a bathroom stall, or just a spot he deemed far away enough from everyone else.

Most embarrassed about wet dreams where he can actually get off in his dreams, deeming that day "surprise laundry inspection/washing day"

Demo

He's pretty lax about jerking off to be honest, has probably drunkenly teased you about you should be careful about how often you keep your shirt off.

"Ey laddie, careful showin' those pecs around! Cannae imagine you'd like a man eyein' those tits of yours!" Of course it was a joke, you two were close like that. of course he was just teasing you.

Oh god he wanted to fuck your pecs. Unabashedly staring at your chest he imagined how nice his dick would look in-between your pecs, maybe scrunched against a tight wifebeater too oh fuck-

Reletively respectful of everyone's decentcy and only relieves himself either in his room or in the empty showers at 4 in the morning. He's probably only been caught once but never agains after that.

Cums a lot, that's why he prefers the shower wanks to quickly wash away the evidence.

Engie

This man is so fucking ashamed of touching himself to thoughts of you- much like he would be about thinking of anyone. He's got such a huge shame surrounding the whole thing but the evil voice in his head only made him strangely harder.

He imagined you wakling in on him as he whispered out your name and you shaming him as you slide up behind him as your hand wraps around his jerking him off all while telling him just how much of a pervert he is.

This man has the biggest undiscovered humiliation kink god it's so fucking pathetic (i deeply desire him)

Has jerked off in his workshop multiple times with the door deadbolted shut and a drill running to hide what he's doing.

Honestly prefers the feel of vaseline/nonsexy lube on his dick and it's a lot less suspicious to have that around.

Heavy

Doesn't often feel the need due to how high alert he is.

When Heavy is at ease he's more bearlike and chill rather than a hotblooded, horny-brained mess. When he does actually touch himself, he is extremely quiet in his bedroom and quick about the whole ordeal.

Has a nasty "habit" of thinking of you. He assumes it's because you're actually nice to him and he's not been around a woman in god knows how long. You're not womanly-like in the slightest but Heavy likes to think about his hands on your hips as he makes you whine.

Feels a stinging sense of guilt afterwards but generally shrugs the feeling off. It's not really such a bad thing if he keeps it to himself and keeps everything professional, right?

Sniper

I wrote a fic about how I generally feel Sniper jerks it here but I'll rephrase it here as a TLDR

This man is really fucking weird about jerking off to you. He HAS stolen something of yours to smell and fantasize with and if given the chance he WILL steal again.

HUGE scent kink and voyeur/creeping kink kind of like Engie in a way where he wants you to call him out on his bullshit.

Probably the most unprofessional about it. He has fondled himself as he watched you through his scope during battle and he will do it again.

Pretty quick ordeal overall to keep himself sane. He jacks off often and quickly to keep a baseline sense of sanity (pre-nut insanity is a thing and his diagnosis is terminal RIP)

Medic

Honestly I headcanon Medic not feeling a need to masturbate. His lust for you oozes out in his operations in some sort of gorey satisfaction in operations on the team. (think like, the taboo passion of physically rearranging someone's guts gets him off in a weird way.)

This isn't to say he gets sexually aroused by his experiments, it's just that the excitement of the thrills get cross-wired in his brain. When you drop your shirt on the floor to prep for an operation his dick twitches in his pants but that's literally it.

Flirts with you on the operating table <3

The only time he's actually masturbated is for experiements. (One was if he could create life without an egg and the second was to see how much cum could a healthy man extract out of him.)

Spy

This man is so hoity-toity about getting off it's almost a pain to write. It's an actual whole night for him. It starts with a nice bath with oils more expensive than your paycheck, then a professional massage, then a calming cigarette mixed with some top-grade cannabis in either a blunt or in a nice dessert. THEN FINALLY he lays himself down onto his pretty little bed and fucks himself.

And even then Spy has a routine to jerking off to really indulge himself. He starts slow and gentle with teasing touches that go lower and lower until he's strained against the fluffy bathrobe he is cuddled in.

Imagines you riding him a lot, but if he's in the mood to bottom, he slowly fucks himself with a pretty nice vibrator as he imagines you fucking him as your dick brushed against his prostate in the most delicious of ways.

This man is convinced that every other merc assumed that he gets too many bitches to need to masturbate and he fully intends to keep that assumption alive and well.

[star-dust-shark]

pjo characters as weird and dumb things me and my friends have said

Percy: what the fuck is cockblocking like I can't block ur cock on Snapchat

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Will: UUUUUUUGH MY ASS HURTS- ooh look a butterfly

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Leo: I CANT FIND MY PRETTY STICKER- AW FUCK- SHIT- MY VAGINA- OOAOoOoOOooAHAHHAgh

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Jason: I can't actually believe I just agreed with you but hey here we are

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Reyna: why the fuck am I friends with any of you hoes

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Piper: should I...? too late I did it

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Will: the best way to rizz someone up is by rizzing them up *turns to friend, winks horribly* hey baby girl

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Rachel: one sec getting my anger out *aggressively splatters paint on canvas*

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Annabeth: sometimes I'm smart. When I'm smart, I'm smart. *awkward thumbs up and grimace*

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Octavian: fuck the gays they should all die ... I mean I could fuck some gays

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Hazel: I'll make you tea but not in a sweet way I'll make it so hot in burns your tongue and you can't speak for a week

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Frank: hey guys check me out I'm a furry on drugs *WOOOF WOOF BARK BARK BARK WOOF WOOF*

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Grover: I love plants :3 specifically magic mushrooms but like

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Leo: I mean I would totally fuck you but like respect man

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Will: Ugh fuck my life I hate everything *coldplay starts playing* I retract the previous statement I fucking love life

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Jason: UGH UR ALL SO DUMB but I'm in

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Nico: if u wanna kys clap ur hands *rapidly claps hands*

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Piper: *hypnotizes u with my beautiful blue orbs* come over to my house

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Hazel: respectfully hope you die <3

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Frank: I'm on acid what's it called when a ton of cats jump on each other a dog pile or a cat pile

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Reyna: OH THANK GOD- sike I don't believe in that motherfucker hahahha

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Annabeth: I'm so smart *holds up the one good test I got in school* see the teacher even gave me an 11/10 because I wrote my name in a cool font

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Leo: UUUUUGGGGGHHHH IM SO HORNY- *mom walks in* oh hi mom how are you

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Will: we can just... fuck. as friends though no homo.

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Rachel: IF I DON'T DRAW SOMETHING IN THE NEXT FEW MINUTES I AM GOING TO MAUL SOMEONE

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Octavian: you all suck and I hate you *silence* no wait come back

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Someone: haha ur gay

Nico: yeah??? and ur not?? like don't knock it until you try it dick is yummy man

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Hazel: someone just told me what smearing is and honestly I kinda wanna die *fix you by coldplay starts playing* LMAO WTF

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Frank: you sad ass emo dog just be happy

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Percy: I Am OnE wiTh ThE oCeAn AnD HopEfuLLy aLL oF ThE hOt MerPeOpLe In iT

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Leo: *talking to literally nobody* hey guys!! gonna go get my top surgery! *shows up at claires*

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Reyna: I only wanna die sometimes and that's normal right

RIGHT

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Will: *playing guitar* haha look guys I'm fingering A minor *strums violently*

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Jason: screw men *eyes widen* I should start taking my own advice ngl

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Will: *listening to a playlist that Nico made him* ugh my emo ass boyfriend and his stupid music I hate him *proceeds to write his name over and over again in diary with hearts around it*

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Nico: what if I strangle someone with a pair of earbuds

Will: please don't

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Leo: *in demonic voice* LeAf *eats it*

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Nico: *pulls gay flag out of pocket* omg it's u

Will: *shuffles around in pocket, finds condom* ... it's u, vanilla flavoured

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Leo: my name's Leo

Percy: and I like jugs

Nico: I'm mentally ill

Leo: and I'm on drugs :D

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Jason: is there anything better than pussy

Piper: I thought you where gay

Jason:

Jason: my boyfriend's trans?

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Will: the temptation to fuck an emo boy rn is killing me

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Leo: the masculine urge to

Leo:

Leo: I forgor

-

Will: that's good!

Nico: like me in bed

*silence*

-

Leo: smash or pass Ryan Gosling

Nico: SMASH

Will: PASS

Solangelo: *glares at each other*

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Nico: omg stop with that song

Will: but

Will: but you can take me hot to go :(

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Annabeth: yeah

Percy: yeah

Annabeth: *in funny voice* yeah

Percy *hentai moan* yEEEAAAaaH

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Leo: *pointing at Nico* EEEEEEWWWW AN EMOOOOOO EWWW

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Jason: never ever look up what an eyesha erotica lyric means

Reyna:

Reyna: oh you poor soul *pats back*

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Nico: I can't breathe

Will: just

Will: breathe air

Nico: I breathe drugs

-

Piper: I'm gonna go play basketball

Leo: haha play with my balls

Jason: already do

Leo: *chokes on air*

well that's all sorry for the torture, thanks to @localcosplaymushroom, @crowwolf8, @justagremlinoncaffeine, and @secret-mewtwo for all of the funny convos that went into this

[nayatarot777]

What Blessings Are Coming To You Within The Next 3 Months? {Patreon Exclusive}

• Pile One •

Hi Pile One, welcome to your reading!

The first blessing that I’m seeing is that your intuition is going to be almost tethered to you. You might feel like your intuition comes and goes - or at least your ability to connect to your intuition, since your intuition is always there - but sometimes you might feel like you are being blocked from tapping in to it. However, one of your blessings over the next three months is that you are going to experience your ability to tap into your intuition in a very consistent way. Your intuition is almost going to feel bound to you. Like you can’t get rid of it. Like it can’t go anywhere. Like you can’t be blocked from tapping into it anymore. And this is going to give you the opportunity to use your intuition to protect - not only yourself - but also other people. I’m seeing your intuition even scaring off energies in the spiritual realm as well as energies within other people who don’t have your best interest in mind. I’m seeing that the people who this scares off may be frightened by how it seems like you’ve all of a sudden been able to see through them by this point. For others of you, I’m seeing that you may be meeting new people who your intuition warns you against. The strength of your intuition and how they feel you’re able to see who they truly are and their true intentions will scare them off, because it seems to them like the secrets and the things that they would much rather hide are clearly being perceived by you.

Your next blessing is that whoever has been persecuting you, vilifying you, and sending a bunch of hating energy your way is going to experience a complete reversal in the direction of their negative energy. Whoever has been sending this persecution your way is going to be experiencing it for themselves. You may have done a return to sender for the witches out there or the magicians or the people who have discovered the ability to manipulate energy. Whichever way you do your return to senders, it is going to work and it is going to hit this person intensely. All these people. As I’m even seeing a group. It’s almost like they wanted to burn you at the stake (figuratively speaking), but there’s going to be a complete transformation in the direction of the energy. Whatever energy they’re sending your way is going to come back onto them. This is even hitting the bystanders. The people who have enabled this person or group who have been vilifying you. The same people who stood by and just watched and didn’t say anything and didn’t step in. It’s going to hit them too.

Another blessing is that you are going to experience some type of virility. A viral moment that you have manifested because you stepped into the magician energy and understood that you had all of the tools to create and manifest whatever it is that you wanted to. You’ve been using your resources around you to create a stable foundation. You’ve been using your natural skills and abilities and for this, you are going to experience huge popularity. Maybe even fame. This fame could be related to messages that you give out or advice or counselling. Or the way that you empower people in someway. I am even seeing that you may be given the opportunity to sign a contract. Or this is you being in the position to give other people contracts in order to work for you. If you’re the one being given a contract, this is being given by someone who has a lot of leadership energy. A lot of masculine energy. They have a lot of abundance and it’s almost like they own their own kingdom figuratively and they see your potential. They see your skill. They see the magic in what you create or what you do and they wanna add you into their empire. This person could come across as quite intimidating in a way. There is a lot of Aries energy that this person has. This definitely could be a masculine. There’s also something about tapping into your intuition with this person because working for them will require you to give something of yourself. To sacrifice something of yourself and I don’t feel like this is a negative energy because this is about your blessings - however, just make sure that you know exactly what you’re getting into so that you can be prepared for whatever the work is that you’d need to do for this person.

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• Pile Two •

Hi Pile Two, welcome to your reading.

The first blessing that I’m seeing for you guys is protection around your financial stability. Protection around your career, your job, your business, and maybe even your family since the 10 of Pentacles is out here. If you are worried about an elderly person - specifically an elderly woman - then she is also protected in terms of her health. Her health will be stable. This could also be protection around an inheritance from an elderly person or an elderly woman. So if you are worrying about an inheritance possibly being taken from you unfairly, then don’t worry. That inheritance or windfall of money will be yours and it will give you a lot of financial stability and blessings. Your finances are growing quite quickly. I’m seeing multiple streams of income, and together, they will create a very stable income for you. I’m also seeing a scenario for someone in which an elderly woman is trying to deceive or lie or take from your family for financial reasons and you are protected from this elderly woman. She has quite a cold and callous energy. She may even come across as evil within her mindset and the things that she is willing to do, but you don’t need to worry because you and your family and your families’ assets and money are protected from her.

The next blessing is an amplification in true, genuine love between you and another person. For most of you, I am seeing a romantic relationship but this could definitely be a best friend or someone who is just very close to you. It could even be a family member, but the communication of love between you and this other person is definitely going to increase. And again, I’m seeing your connection with this person being very protected. The protection around this connection with this person is actually getting stronger. You are vibrating alongside this person at a very high frequency. You are both individuals who have high frequency within your energetic field. Both of you can tap into pure, genuine love for yourselves as well as each other, so lower frequencies and lower vibrations really can’t affect you and your connection with this person. If this amplification of love isn’t with another person, then I’m also seeing that this is just an amplification of love towards yourself regarding the way that you talk to yourself. As well as how you talk about yourself to other people, and even the way that you think about yourself. There is more alignment within yourself over these next three months because of the fact that you have increased your self love. You are treating yourself and feeling about yourself the same way that you would a partner who you love, so just take which message resonates - whether this love is about you and the connection to yourself or you and another person.

Another one of your blessings is a secret, and I feel like this isn’t necessarily a secret to you, but it is a secret that you will be holding. In terms of you working and collaborating on a project with other people. If this is a secret to you, then I’m seeing that there are people collaborating behind-the-scenes, and again, these people are collaborating as a way of protecting you. You might not even realise this consciously, but for some of you, there may be people who are working together to protect you from someone or something. The blessing is that you are going to be able to collaborate with people who are a very protective group of people. You could even be in some type of hidden or secret group and I feel like you’re going to learn a lot from this group of people. I’m seeing a lot of studying. A lot of taking notes. Whether this is literally or mentally. This group is going to be teaching you a lot of practical advice. They could be giving you valuable information on how to structure something for the sake of your financial or practical stability. This could have something to do with metaphysics and manifestation, but I’m definitely seeing that your blessing is learning from a feminine energy who has a lot of knowledge alongside other people. And all of you will be learning very valuable information on how to reprogram your mind or your life. I’m seeing a bunch of code - programming code - in my mind, so I feel like this is the energy of learning how to manipulate energy. How to see through what most people would call “the matrix” or the illusions and how to reprogram the matrix for the sake of your own benefit, stability, and comfortability. This is hidden knowledge that you guys are learning and this is a big blessing, so please value it and make sure to take notes and study what you need to in order to put this into practice.

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• Pile Three •

Hi Pile Three! Welcome to your reading about your blessings over the next three months.

So the first thing that I’m seeing is that any blockages that have prevented you from showing up as your authentic self and expressing your authentic identity is being removed. I’m seeing that you’ve had a history of being attacked by other people for your authentic nature. However, part of this blessing is realising that there is a lot of knowledge to be acquired about yourself through your authenticity. I’m also seeing that you could be connecting with a group of people. I’m hearing up to 2 people who are also authentic in their nature and somehow teach you how to step into your authenticity too. Or you may have given up on expressing your authenticity because it seemed to be the root cause of a lot of pain and conflict that you had to experience, however I feel like you are going to be intuitively seeing the value and the worth of your authentic nature. You could also be teaching other people about authenticity. You could be the one helping someone else who has been so beaten down for their true self, and this could be another way that you find value in your authentic energy - by helping others.

Another part of your blessing is also the wisdom that you are gaining. And I feel like this wisdom about yourself is something that you will have to defend, but you are prepared to do so. And I’m seeing two very loyal people again - these could even be spirit guides who are helping you to defend your knowledge about self and your knowledge about authenticity. This blessing contains a lot of self empowerment and standing up for yourself. Defending yourself and having support in the process. Your creativity is also a huge part of your blessings. You’ve been crafting something, and again I’m seeing two energies here in this card about creativity. These two energies are being depicted as the silhouette of two crows, so I feel like these are two spirit guides that are protecting your creations. Perhaps 2 people who have passed over? Your creations are somehow bringing balance and justice into your life, and I’m hearing that you are relaying messages from the divine and channelling what you’re intuitively picking up on within your creative process. Whatever it is that you create, it is something that is futuristic. It’s something that might not be entirely popular now but I am seeing that the energy that you have been putting into this creation is coming back to you in the form of monetary value, mainly. Whatever you’re creating, you are making from the heart. Your heart space is being channelled into this and it makes sense because your intuition is definitely connected to your heart. Again, I’m seeing that what you’re creating is bringing through wisdom to help other people step into their authentic nature, and as a result, your good karma will come your way within the next three months. All of the energy that you are putting into your creations is coming back to you mainly in the form of status or money - or both.

I am also seeing that another blessing could be your leadership when it comes to being the protector of other people. Perhaps up to 2 other people in particular. I feel like you are not just defending yourself. You are also defending other people who have been hurt in the past, as well as teaching them how to value themselves and their authentic selves.

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[wifeyoozi]

What is your opinion of ot13 with a taller s/o

Ot13 seventeen : when you are taller than them

seungcheol : ok on surface he doesn't shows if it affects him or not but deep down he just loves how tall you are. He was a little insecure at the very very start about being shorter than you, but now he absolutely loves it. He'll buy you a lot of heels if you like wearing them just so he can crane his neck up and look at you like that. Loves feeling of you two give the vibe of the rich CEO and his model girlfriend.

Jeonghan : you just gave him the perfect opportunity to be a bratty sub. He actually loves feeling tiny next to you. He'll also definitely call you noona/mommy even if you are younger than him just so you'll baby him. Would sometimes wear baggy clothes and cuddle next to your side just to feel tinier next to you.

Joshua : I think he doesn't mind at all? Like "oh you're 180 cm? That's like so cool! Anyways my fave colour is blue wbu?" Like he'd love the fact you're so tall and so pretty but it wouldn't really affect him as much even if you weren't.

Jun : in public, he'll opt the more traditionally masculine and dominant roles despite your height, but in private, he is just a babie. absolute babie. you're gonna have to pamper him and always pay attention to him and peg him and cuddle with him. unironically always the little spoon.

hoshi : literally on his knees for you. you are his queen, his tigress and he's gonna worship you all the time. loves when you ruffle his hair or rest your head on top of his. is always hugging your hips. he may even wear some of your clothes if they look baggy on him.

wonwoo : an otherwise very dom wonu would sub for you. he is so tall and if you are taller than him, you are literally a goddess and he will do anything you ask him to. lowkey develops a praise kink with you. but he's also very soft for you and would take care of you all the time instead of letting otherway around happen.

woozi : at first he was really shy and insecure about roaming around with you in public, especially when you wore heels. also hates the way his members sometimes (all the time) teased him about it, but that phase passed soon, after he got more comfortable around you and you scolded his friends for teasing him. now he's a proud boyfriend who loves to show off his beautiful model-like tall girlfriend.

minghao : I just know everytime you two go out people think you are some luxury brand models. He feels proud of your height actually, loves how beautiful and elegant you look when you wear the luxurious brand clothes he buys you. Wouldn't be shy or embarassed at all about looking shorter to you.

Mingyu : the fact that you are taller than him is hot enough already, lemme tell you that first. You are one powerful couple. He likes lifting you up just so he's craning his neck up at you like you are the sun to his life (you definitely are). He just finds you so incredibly hot for being that height, loves when you use your height to dominate over him sometimes

Seokmin : he's so shy about it. Not embarrassed shy but i-am-so-in-love-with-you shy. Believes that you are the most beautiful woman on the planet. Literally would do anything for you. On his knees to eat you out serve you anytime of the day. Literally feels so subby when you're next to him.

Seungkwan : he loves how close his face is to your boobs. He could hug you and his face would be planted in your boobs or in the crook of your neck. So damn comforting. Feels so safe around you, especially when you hug him from the back and rest your head on top of his. Tho he'd be sooooo damn sulky for the rest of the month of you made even a single joke about his height even once hehe.

Vernon : externally, he doesn't look like the height difference bothers him at all. Internally he's screaming MOMMY. Loves the way you tower him, especially when you're riding him. He's your big responsibility. Can't shut up about you being the hottest woman everytime he's with his friends talking about their girlfriends. Literally still in shock how he managed to pull you.

Chan : at first he was a little embarrassed and tried to wear insoles and heels a lot often to look as tall as you, if not taller. Don't get him wrong, he loves how tall and beautiful you are and literally simps over you for that, he just feels insecure about his own height sometimes. Tho now he doesn't mind the height anymore, since you told him about how you love him the same despite his height. In fact he loves being shorter to you sometimes now, feeling how it makes your relationship more unique.