#sometimes I hate how masculine I am
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
wow-an-unfunny-joke · 8 months ago
Text
My gender is weird, being genderfluid is weird, if I had a single say in this I would’ve picked something easier for me to wrap my head around
19 notes · View notes
kurakuradonn · 14 days ago
Text
Hum. I think I just found out my gender identity.
#🦋​musings#I won’t say it yet since I don’t like people assigning stereotypes on me but uh#its more of a how I see myself kind of thing#like being a ‘woman’ is like. just what you are functionally and socially with the most experience of being#but other times I am either a little guy that doesn’t mind being feminine#like being a woman is a drag persona level stuff#or a genderless entity that is apathetic towards how I am referred to#I don’t feel extreme dysphoria but I do feel like ‘:/ not really it chief’#but I do feel a kind of euphoria when Im referred by masculine titles idk#not that I hate being a woman/im not a woman at all; I do like womanhood too#but yeah they/them for the most part lmao#was afraid to come out since a platonic ex of mine was spouting about what genders were ‘real’ and ‘fake’#‘I must use my REAL ASSIGNED GENDER PRONOUNS or I am a TRENDER!!’ + other platonic ex was already using she/her on me without asking anyway#and it always felt off/sometimes demeaning in the way that they say it#aOh and don’t get me started on how people started to treat me once I started using she/her I swear some of y’all#and the fetishy babyfied way people treated me when I used masculine titles and pronouns#ANYHOW#and even thought it didn’t fully fit with me + the misogyny felt awful I thought I was a wannabe liar for wanting to explore myself#then realized after leaving that I can in fact be all and neither because that’s only for me to decide#not that there’s anything wrong with feminine identity; I just resent how people treat you due to the simple difference of your identity#GOD the more I look into 2019 until 2021 I realize how god awful of a place I was in#yeah I’m washed up old and nobody gives a shit cause I’m not giving them free art but life is so liberating now#I HAVE NO MASTERS NOR CREEDS TO HEED TO!#fuck them bitches!!!
3 notes · View notes
nanowired-lover · 1 year ago
Text
im pretty sure some transmasc ppl can relate and said already but i want my gender to be ''male crossdressing presenting''. I want ppl to look at me and be lile ''this is a GUY, a MAN, a DUDE and he wears things like a woman but when he tells you he's a guy you know he is." I want to look hyper fem and hyper masc. I want to change between a bubbly emotional lil angry dude and your sweet tranvestite.
10 notes · View notes
trentcrimminallybeautiful · 2 years ago
Note
Sorry. I meant cis ted.  I would never baby girls transman that would be offensive.
???? yeah i mean. i kind of figured you probably meant cis ted, i was saying I got distracted on the topic of feminization kink. also i mean. yeah it CAN be offensive but i was talking about how me, as a trans man, enjoys feminization kink on a trans male/transmasc character (in this case trent, sorry) bc i project a lot😩 and it's fun specifically because of the inherent contradictory na--i mean i did explain this? didn't i? i. sorry??
#please tell me im not about to get a bunch of anon hate for . [checks notes] having a kink#anyway i only like it done a certain way like. im not into misgendering or whatever its more just like. ohhh idk how to explain it rn#Again. Headache#but like. its ABOUT the contradictory nature of it its ABOUT how it#ironically--perhaps paradoxically--is validating of my/his gender#and like i mean. aftercare. praise kink anyone? good boy? love that shit. validation.#like. it's just. a guy can enjoy being feminized. and a trans guy is a guy#with as much wide variety as cis guys#and sometimes hes into that! and not necessarily in the specific Misgendering way but just. in the regular way. like a cis guy might be. yk#sources: I Am Into It And I'm Transmasc#anyway tldr IM babygirling trans trent bc id like to masculine enough to be babygirld.#plus ngl it just plays into my Complicated Gender Feelings#one of my ideal genders (i collect them like a dragon#im fluid i think but i lean very masc but in different shades?) is like#i want to look like a boy in girl's clothing if that makes sense. masculine enough that i could wear a dress and people would think#'guy in a dress' not 'lady' but still like. you know. wearing the dress.#and this plays into that--being masculine enough that you can be feminized and still be recognizably a guy? or know that you are still like#you and your partner still Know and Perceive you're a guy? you know?#the security of that in your own gender + safety/trust in your partner + it's FUN it's just fun#idk how else to explain it man but it's literally me projecting my personal feelings#also idk what emoji that is it wont load for me rip#ANYWAY sorry to derail thats why i did it in the tags. im just like#honestly not as interested in ted getting railed which--again not that it's not valid but it's also like 90 percent of the fan content for#the ship and like. again that's not invalid or Not Canon or something im just more interested in WRITING about trent getting railed#bc i have blorbo disease and my own preferences yknow?#askbox#anonymous#if i get like. Cancelled over this. im going to. like. walk into the sea
4 notes · View notes
yuribalisms · 2 years ago
Text
Lesbian or trans guy…. Lesbian or trans guy… lesbian or trans guy…. That is The question
#like !!!!!! I would like this To Be Over#rn Im Kinda doing a thing where I ‘came out’ as a trans guy to a bunch of ppl#(my friends and dad’s side of the family ya know ppl it’s not a big deal for)#and trying to present more masculine more often#mostly to see if I like it better#it’s basically an experimentation thing despite me still not being sure#because I thought it would help because hey!!! if I really like it then great! I’m a dude!#if I hate it or it makes me uncomfortable then great!!!! not a dude!!!!#unfortunately it is not working out that way and I am still mostly confused#like…. I just don’t understand 😭😭😭 I want to understand and I don’t#I got jealous when my friend started hormones and then I was talking about gender issues with my therapist and she asked if I wanted her to#write me a letter for hormones or any surgeries and the idea of changing my body like that made me viscerally uncomfortable#like what!!!!! the fuck!!!!!! what is wrong with me!!!!!#why can I not just know exactly what I want and how I want ppl to refer to me and how I want to be seen#my friends call me ‘he’ and their pets ‘uncle’ and my dad called me his son and like okay awesome#I think I kinda like it but it’s also a goddamn jumpscare every fuckin time#sometimes I think I like being a guy but also I wanna be a lesbian#and like sometimes I wanna be a dude but the idea of having a dick? absolutely fucking not I KNOW I don’t want that#but I want a deeper voice and more body hair#and just ugh UGH I DONT UNDERSTAAAAAAND#like yeah I know I’m almost certainly on the non-binary spectrum like there’s no denying that#but :( I just wanna know how I want to look and be seen so I could actually take steps towards being more comfortable#because no matter what I’ve tried I’ve never been completely comfortable#guy or girl even sometimes androgynous it just isn’t working#I just want to be Me and I feel fine but literally the second I get referred to as anything from an outside party#it sparks intense euphoria or dysphoria but it’s not consistent so I can’t figure it out#anyways I wanna melt into the floor of this Costco one of my dude coworkers called me ‘man’ and I cringed but then another coworker called#me ‘she’ and I also cringed#like what the fuck what in fresh hell I’m so frustrated I just want it all to stop#like it’s all fun and games ‘haha I’m a boy lesbian’ and sometimes yeah that does feel right but also both are wrong and just
6 notes · View notes
gor3sigil · 6 months ago
Text
Before starting T, when I socially transitionned, I was surrounded by radical feminists who saw masculinity as gross and inherently evil, something to avoid, something to make fun of, something to destroy. The other transmascs in my friend group, sometimes, told me that they didn’t knew if they really were non-binary or if they just were scared shitless of saying “I am a man”. Because they saw this as a betrayal to their younger self who had been SAd and abused.
I saw many of my masc friends and trans men around me hate themselves, not outing themselves as men because it would imply so so much, it was like opening the Pandora Box. Even when we were just together, talking about our masculinity was always coated with bits like “I know we’re the privileged ones but…”, “I don’t want to sound like I have it bad but…”, “Women obviously have it worse, but last time…” and we were talking about terrible traumas we experienced while taking all the precautions in the world in the case the walls were a crowd of people in disguise waiting to get us if we didn’t downplay the violence we faced, or like crying and being upset and being traumatized and afraid and scared and to say it out loud would make us throw up the needles we were forced to swallow every second of every day living in our skin.
Most of us weren’t on T yet, some of us were catcalled every day and harassed in the streets or in abusive relationships nobody seemed to care to help them get out of because they were “strong enough” to do it by themselves.
I was using the gender swap face app and cried for ours when I saw my father looking back at me through the screen. The idea of transforming, of shedding into a body that would deprive me of love, tenderness, and safety, was absolutely terrifying. I knew I couldn’t stay in this body any longer because it wasn’t mine, but I also knew that if I was going to look like my dad, my brother, my abusers, it would be so much worse.
5 years later and I’m almost 2 years on T, and almost 2 months post top surgery.
I ditched my previous group of friends. I was bullied out of my local trans community. But let me tell you how free I am.
I was scared that T would break my singing voice: it made it sound more alive than ever.
I was scared that T would make me less attractive: it made me find myself hot for the first time in my life.
I was scared that T would make me gain weight: it did. But the weight I put on is not the weight I used to put on by binging and eating my body until I forgot that it even existed. It’s the weight of my body belonging to me, little by little. The wolf hunger for life.
I won’t tell you the same story I see everywhere, the one that goes “I started going to the gym 8 times a week, I put on some muscles, I started a diet and now I look like an action film actor”, in fact if you took pictures of me from 5 years ago vs now I’d just have more acne, I’d have longer hair and still look like I don’t know what to do with myself when I take selfies.
But the sparkle in my eyes, my smile, tell the whole story way better than this long ass stream of words could ever.
I want to say some things that I wish someone told me before starting medically transitionning.
It’s okay to take your time. It’s your body, it’s your journey, if you don’t feel comfortable taking full doses and want to go slow, the only voice you need to listen to is your own. Do what feels right.
If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break, it’s okay to ask for support.
Trans people are holy. Everyone is. You didn’t lose your angel wings when you came out because you want to be masculine. You are not excluded from the joy of existence, from being proud of yourself, from being sad, from being scared, from being angry. The emotions and feelings you allowed yourself to feel while processing what you experienced when you grew up as a girl and was seen as a woman are still as valid as before. Nobody can take that from you. If someone tries to, don’t let them.
It’s perfectly normal to grieve some things you were and had before you started to transition, like your high soprano voice or even your chest. Hatching is painful. You can find comfort in things that don’t feel right, so making the decision to change can be incredibly scary and weird and you deserve to be heard and supported through this. Wanting top surgery doesn’t make the surgery less intense, less terrifying, less painful to recover from. When it becomes too much you have the right to take a break and take some deep breaths before going on.
You don’t have to have a radical, 180° change for your transition to be acceptable or valid or worthy of praise. Look at how far you’ve come already. It doesn’t have to show, you’re not made to be a spectacle, you’re human and it is your journey.
Oh, and last thing, you know when some people say “Oh this trans person has to grow out of the cringy phase where you think that you can write essays about being trans or transitionning or just their experience because it’s weird” ? If you ever hear this or see this online, remember all the people whose writing you read and, even if they were not professional writers, helped you more than any theorists did ? If you want to write, do it. It won’t be a waste. It can help people. Or it won’t, and even then, if it helped you, that’s enough.
Love every of my trans siblings, take care of yourselves. You deserve the world.
12K notes · View notes
justthoughtsandstuffblog · 9 months ago
Text
Damn I meant to get on the Man Train™ to Man Town™ to go to Man Job™ today but somehow I accidentally got on the Dysphoria Train™ instead :/
0 notes
wistfulfag · 1 year ago
Text
been thinking about goin by (chucky voice) genda fluid lately....
0 notes
jazzywrldastro · 1 month ago
Text
✮Astro Observations - 1✮
Tumblr media
⇱ Mars in 11th- can have a few friends and it
means that there's only a few people that can be with you be with you. You have to look for friends sometimes you can attract toxic people. get along with men.
⇱ Libra risings- make decisions based on other peoples opinions and then regret them. Sometimes they want to please other people and make those decisions and then they quickly regret it after a while.
⇱ Mercury in the 12th - attract a lot of gossipers.
People can say stuff behind their backs. People can make up things about them and it's very quiet sometimes sometimes they don't even know about it. They need to be careful what they say to whom because people can be very jealous and envious and try to pull them down. (honestly I feel bad for these people.)
⇱ Venus in 11th - people find these people
beautiful even though they don't see it subconsciously (I actually have an 11th cancer Venus and people see me is very nurturing and very beautiful and i'm like " girl bye " but i actually really am)
⇱ fire signs - impatient as hell. they won't wait for you. if you don't give them too much or you don't give them all they'll leave you. If they have a Mars and fire sign, they're quick to resent very quickly if you don't fulfill their dreams they hate you when you cancel something and sometimes have to make one decision impulsively quick. I can kinda relate lmao 😂
⇱ Aquarius- they are often loners they spend time by themselves because they think it's easy. They like having their own freedom and hate when people try to take it from them.
♡ Venus or Mars in Leo- want the energy of
being in the spotlight and being seen for who they are, but in a nice way, not a negative way
✩ Your moon sign- is your safe place how you
emotionally comfort yourself. Mine is in Gemini so communication and talking basically comforts me talking when I'm upset even helps me to feel safe with air moon needs mental stimulation. Someone with a fire moon needs space. Someone with a water moon needs emotional support.
Venus is feminine energy and Mars is masculine energy (when you look at the sign of female, which is shaped f it represents the female, femininity, beauty, and love and when you I Mars it represents the beauty of a man, masculinity and power.
⇱ Gemini placements can be journalist. (I have Gemini placement and I love learning about new things in a blog.)
⇱ Taurus Venus- have good manners and (I could picture these placements as kids and listening well behaved to their parents)
⇱ Leo suns- like revealing clothes, booty shorts, camis ,bralettes and crops
⇱ Virgo suns- have tiny messes but not a lot of mess they'll be not okay with their room looking like a tornado
⇱ Libra suns/ placements like piercings ( don't matter where) ex -( I have a Libra moon friend that loves piercings and has a septum and body and lip piercings
⇱ Gemini suns-love hands they like the feeling of holding hands.
⇱ Scorpio suns - basically like Virgo ( they observe) but actually arent that mysterious ( they really arent the mysterious type )
⇱ Capricorn suns- kind of shy, dont show their personality fully until they are comfortable
⇱ Aquarius suns- will ask you anything out of the blue if it's something they learned.
ꨄ Pisces suns/ placements- will go above and beyond (the can be extreme) when pushed to that point ( oof I’m scared 😭)
577 notes · View notes
teaboot · 1 month ago
Note
Do you think that cis men feel the same way as trans men do? Like with how men get treated by society as being inherently evil and as predators?
I think maybe both cis and trans men experience these issues but it's easier for a trans guy to point it out because he gets to see people so quickly turn on him for being a man while transitioning
oh yeah definitely
I find "meninists" fucking obnoxious, especially as any of their VALID concerns fall under the bracket of feminism, but there does exist a presence of radfems and terfs that are scarily eager to lash out at anything resembling masculine that. Definitely needs to be addressed somehow
Like. There's a mile of middle ground between "Um yeah women have problems, whatever, but what about ME and MY FEELINGS 😢" and "I am genuinely trying my best to be thoughtful and considerate of others, and everything I do is being met with bad-faith interpretations and dismissal"
And I think the best advice I have for anyone else getting bogged down by this is that. like.
If someone is determined to see the worst in you, nothing you can do to prove otherwise will be enough. You will never change that person's mind. They don't want you to change their mind. So like... just focus on you, and keep doing your best, and learn, and know that people determined to find something nasty don't really have an issue with YOU- they have their own experiences and traumas coloring their worldview.
Someone who is determined to see you as a monster will only ever see a monster. So it's better to ask yourself, "would a monster do what I'm doing?". If the answer is yes, take steps to change that. If the answer is no, then it's not about you, and you can give yourself permission to move on.
So... yeah, I imagine cis men probably do feel the way I feel about this sorta thing sometimes.
Except, like. After a lifetime being a girl, living as a girl, fighting for equality as the only girl in a lot of men's spaces, being a feminist girl and an Eldest Daughter girl and calling out the bullshit only to later realize I'm not a girl... and that Im actually mostly a dude, still a feminist... at least when people call me a mysoginist, I know they're talking out their ass
I can kinda see where young men encounter their very first radfems calling themselves feminists and immediately become radicalized right-wing conservatives cause like. If I as a teen thought feminism meant Radfems and Terfs, I'd probably start running too
It's all just so exhausting
Any one group being wholesale grouped as "100% helpless gentle victim" or "100% selfish malevolent monster" is doomed, imo
(Now watch the notes blow up with "this is just 'not all men' rhetoric, lol)
But anyways I hate nuance I hate interpretation I hate implication and symbolism and context and I wish everything in the world was simpler so we could all blow a collective joint together and invent some new soups
454 notes · View notes
genderqueerdykes · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
thank you both for this, i was literally in the process of writing a post about this as i saw these.
i came out as bisexual when i was about 19 or 20 years old, in 2011 - 2012. this was such a difficult thing because everyone around me suddenly had very pointed opinions on me. suddenly i wasn't queer anymore, i was a straight person. i asked people why and they said well bisexual people are half straight, which makes you straight, which means gay people don't want to be around you. i was told nobody likes bisexuals because they're too straight to be gay and too gay to be straight
i had a literal personal dilemma because i didn't feel like that at all. when i was realizing i was bisexual i was realizing i was attracted to all genders in a queer way. i did NOT feel like my attraction to men, women or genderqueer people was straight in any way, shape or form. i've always fit in much better in both gay and lesbian circles. those have always been my home, and my community
in the early days of my transition, when "genderqueer" wasn't even remotely heard of, i had to try to transition into being a man to be seen as trans at all. i went from being forced into lesbian spaces to being forced into gay male spaces. nobody let me pick where i was existing. i was being pushed around. i liked both lesbian and gay male spaces, but i was being told when i could and couldn't occupy the spaces. and then when it came out i was bi everyone called me a traitor and said i was a straight person
my best friend at the time came with me to pride meetings and when her mom found out about that, and that i was bi, she told my friend she couldn't come to those pride meetings anymore, and that i was turning her daughter into a lesbian. her mother would not stop calling me a lesbian all throughout my life. from early childhood, she thought me and her daughter were dating because i was butch and she was femme and we were very close. her mom carried this belief into adulthood, asking her outright if we were lovers. her brother thought we were, too, and taunted us about it.
my own mom weaponized lesbianism against me. she hated how butch i was. she hated that i "looked and acted like a lesbian". she called me a butch and a bulldyke hatefully. she told me not to dress or look certain ways or else people would assume i, and her by some proxy, were lesbians. my mom was insanely butch so i don't really know why this was being leveraged against me but either way when i became a young adult and my mom was trying to force me to learn to drive (something i am terrified of doing due to having 2 dissociative disorders), she asked what kind of car i would ideally like. i said a truck. i was standing there in a purple plaid shirt and she just sighed and went "I knew you were a lesbian." she pointed out my shirt. she was weaponizing lesbophobic and butchphobic stereotypes against me, but either way, reinforcing that i was a lesbian in one capacity or another
i got so tired of my friends harassing me for saying that if i was bi that meant i was straight and i needed to stop calling myself gay because i wasn't, and that it was an "insult" to the gay community. note that nobody gave a singular flying fuck about the bisexual community at all. i was literally bullied out of identifying as bi, because my straight cishet male friends hated it, and my lesbian identifying GF was uncomfortable with it because it made me sound too straight.
the thing is, none of these people asked what being bisexual meant to me.
i actually liked the lesbian community a lot. i really love other lesbians. i have always been attracted to lesbian and butch identifying people for as long as i could remember. i loved seeing strong butch women on TV, even if there were rude jokes. i loved the idea of being a masculine person who is sometimes a queer masculine woman. i loved the idea of being with femmes, i loved queer women and people who took femininity to the next level. i also loved seeing gay men when and wherever they existed. i always felt like i fit right in, and like i was seeing a reflection of a part of myself i needed help discovering.
i have almost always, as long as i can remember, identified as a gay man, and a lesbian, at the same time. my attraction to men, women, and people of all genders is queer no matter what gender of mine is involved. it doesn't matter. i have never felt "half gay half straight" which is why people weaponizing heterosexuality against me as a bisexual forced me to strictly identify as a gay man for almost a decade. it was painful to ignore my butch lesbian side, and to stop identifying as gay, because people would criticize how attractive i found women, and other people
if people had let me exist and explain what bisexuality means to me, they could've understood that bisexual is an inherently deeply queer attraction no matter what genders are involved, but NOBODY cares to listen to the bisexual. everyone LOVES to speak for us because we're just "straight people invading the queer community."
we've had it. bisexuals are queer. even if they DO identify as "half straight" they're STILL queer. let bisexuals define bisexuality. there is no one size fits all form of bisexuality. every single bisexual defines it differently and that's the point. it's a very complex identity with many layers that often relate to gender and presentation as well as attraction.
let bisexuals define bisexuality.
814 notes · View notes
illnessfaker · 11 months ago
Text
tw: black+trans death
Tumblr media
from the_yvesdropper on instagram:
our beautiful black trans brother, 35 year old Righteous Torrence "Chevy" Hill, was murdered in Atlanta, GA this weekend.
he went by his nickname 'Chevy' he was originally from Macon, GA. he owned Evollusion, which is a black/ queer owned LGBTQ+ salon in Atlanta that provided and dedicated full service to specializing in hair, nails, barbering and makeup. growing up as young black queer boys/kids, the barbershop experience can sometimes be a tricky space to occupy, this was something that Chevy understood and wanted to cultivate a space of safety where you can also get the affirming look and style you want, and he did exactly that.
Chevy was a beloved son, brother, partner, and father.
one of his last posts that had a photo of himself said :
"if you truly know me, you know i am a humble, modest, private man, that i love my community, i have the love of God in me and will give the shirt off my back to any soul in need, also i never post pictures of myself, legaey give myself credit, that stops today, i am my legacy!"
(a close friend of Chevy asked if i could share more then one photo of Chevy, since he never posted photos of himself and in recent years he got the confidence to want to share more photos and now he won't get the chance to)
Chevy, hey king, hey brother, hey angel, thank you for everything, i lové you, we lové you, i'm so sorry. there are a lot of photographers in heaven who will be able to photograph you as the glorious black trans angel that you are.
there will be a homegoing service/memorial for our brother
there aren't many details about what happened but apparently he was shot by a family member last wednesday, the 28th (at least this article was the one linked in relation to his murder.)
judging by both the IG post and the comments section he was well-loved by many people and those people have many good memories with him and nothing but good things to say. this is a comment that was left by tirajmeansgolden which was hidden by IG for some reason:
I started testosterone in February 2020. I hit this man up at the end of 2019 after numerous Google searches for an LGBT-friendly barber near me (and by near me... he was a good 35-40 minutes from the rural area I was in outside of Atlanta: but when I found out he was a trans man and that his business was the first and only LGBT hair bar, I knew it would be worth the trip). I was a dysphoric mess in his DMs one Sunday. I hated how my hair was growing out. I never had a "masculine" hairstyle before but decided one day I would buzz it all off myself, then allowed it to grow out a bit... I sent him a video and despite him being closed on Sunday, he told me to come through. I got my hair braided and he gave me my first really masculine fade. Explained the different terms. Lined me up. Was asking me about my decision to transition and provided some helpful advice + guidance. I told him how I was a therapist and he was hype and said he talked with a group of trans men and he would love for me to stop by and also give some mental health tips. So whoever said he was humble - wow, what an understatement. Such a community man! Made me feel SO comfortable because barbershops were a source of major trauma and triggers for me. They were such an integral part of my early transition (I just celebrated 4 years later week). And he was such an integral part of the Atlanta Queer community with hosting events like Queer Con. How I found so many other great resources + queer businesses/artists. May you rest in peace, Chevy. You'll be missed. You've made such a different in the lives of countless people. You definitely were living your Purpose + left a legacy behind ...
1K notes · View notes
isaacthedruid · 2 years ago
Text
(spoilers for the Barbie movie)
As a trans-masc non-binary person, I saw myself in Allan. I’m a boy but not a Ken, I'm Ken-like but not quite.
Tumblr media
Allan’s role of being awkward, unsure and a little out of his element but still trying to help the Barbies through the chaos and events caused by the Kens, is how I feel as a trans-masc person who is still trying to advocate for women and discuss the issues they face.
I don't identify as a woman anymore but I still grew up as a girl, I lived as a young woman for 14 years, and people continue to be misogynistic towards me when they think I am one-- customers will talk to my male coworkers instead of me, when I’m the person with the answers
I wasn’t expecting to see myself, in terms of gender, in the character often described as Ken’s boyfriend, though it is said in a more playful, joking way rather than any attempt at representation. I’m gay and this version of Allan is definitely queer as well. Yet, that’s a separate story which has already been written, here’s an excellent article about that. [LINK]
Allan isn’t Ken, and he isn’t Barbie either. Allan is simply Allan, an idea with both masc and femme traits. He doesn’t fit into anything specific, he just is. Allan can wear Ken’s clothes but also Barbie’s pink jumpsuit-- but when he's not doing that undercover mission with the Barbies, we only ever see him wearing his own clothes. A set of clothes worn only by him, that iconic striped outfit that is signature to the real Allan doll.
Additionally, notice the horse patch on the front of his shirt, he never changed his clothes unlike the rest of the Kens when they discovered the patriarchy and a new version of masculinity, a toxic and destructive one. Allan only added something to his clothes to “fit in” or act as if he did, but he hated what the Kens did to Barbieland. He also wasn't brainwashed and never acted upon those destructive abilities that were laid out for him. He could've just joined the Kens and broke stuff and drank copious amounts of "brewskis" but he didn't.
Allan is different and it's constantly stated, "there's only one Allan" in this world of Kens (and Barbies).
I will never be Ken nor will I ever be a Barbie again, I’m not happy in either. I’ve tried both, neither is my style (or title). I wear Ken’s clothes as well as Barbie’s, and sometimes I wear Allan’s.
But, I like Allan’s clothes best, they fit me well.
3K notes · View notes
prettyboypistol · 1 year ago
Text
TF2 Mercs x M!Reader || How the Mercs Jerk Off +18
minors dni and get blocked
ambiguous genitals for Pyro
Scout
The stereotypical setup of "makes a night of it" sometimes only to end up frantically fucking his fist 10 minutes later as he gasps out your name breathlessly.
Most of the time though his man is a horny mess. Sneaks off to jack off frequently (like 2/month).
Has jerked off in the showers before but prefers his bedroom to relieve himself.
HUUUGE on fantasies. Always talking to himself and imagining you in various ways. His favorite is imagining you blowing him.
Usually lasts a short amount of time, but can recover extremely quickly.
Pyro
Oh. My. God. This is the HORNIEST mf alive when they're lucid. Yeah, they're a little awkward about how close they get to you, but everyone shrugs it off as them being socially unaware.
You smell so amazing to them, the smell of you looks so pretty to them in their head because of their synesthesia. Has embarrassingly gotten off to the colors and feeling of your voice and smell.
Your voice is a calming purple to them with a gentle rumbling against the bottom of their mind, the sound feels a sort of comfortable chilling ironically.
They refuse to do anything outside of their safe space- hell, considering that nobody even knows if Pyro needs to jerk off-
It HAS to be: right vibes, 3 am, locked door, calming smell candles, windows shut, etc etc
Soldier
Has a love/hate relationship with jerking off, he sees it as manly and masculine to release urges, but also weak to indulge himself in base desires.
A manly man thinking of another manly man like yourself? Well technically that's twice the amount of men. At first he assumed he was jealous of your physique, but then he drempt of you on top of him right about to push your-BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEEEEEP 0600 SOLDIER TIME TO WORK
Awkward boners are his specialty, excusing himself to "go oversee the maggots" when you flex a particularily nice deadlift.
Less private than Pyro but still prefers a more private setting like in the woods, a bathroom stall, or just a spot he deemed far away enough from everyone else.
Most embarrassed about wet dreams where he can actually get off in his dreams, deeming that day "surprise laundry inspection/washing day"
Demo
He's pretty lax about jerking off to be honest, has probably drunkenly teased you about you should be careful about how often you keep your shirt off.
"Ey laddie, careful showin' those pecs around! Cannae imagine you'd like a man eyein' those tits of yours!" Of course it was a joke, you two were close like that. of course he was just teasing you.
Oh god he wanted to fuck your pecs. Unabashedly staring at your chest he imagined how nice his dick would look in-between your pecs, maybe scrunched against a tight wifebeater too oh fuck-
Reletively respectful of everyone's decentcy and only relieves himself either in his room or in the empty showers at 4 in the morning. He's probably only been caught once but never agains after that.
Cums a lot, that's why he prefers the shower wanks to quickly wash away the evidence.
Engie
This man is so fucking ashamed of touching himself to thoughts of you- much like he would be about thinking of anyone. He's got such a huge shame surrounding the whole thing but the evil voice in his head only made him strangely harder.
He imagined you wakling in on him as he whispered out your name and you shaming him as you slide up behind him as your hand wraps around his jerking him off all while telling him just how much of a pervert he is.
This man has the biggest undiscovered humiliation kink god it's so fucking pathetic (i deeply desire him)
Has jerked off in his workshop multiple times with the door deadbolted shut and a drill running to hide what he's doing.
Honestly prefers the feel of vaseline/nonsexy lube on his dick and it's a lot less suspicious to have that around.
Heavy
Doesn't often feel the need due to how high alert he is.
When Heavy is at ease he's more bearlike and chill rather than a hotblooded, horny-brained mess. When he does actually touch himself, he is extremely quiet in his bedroom and quick about the whole ordeal.
Has a nasty "habit" of thinking of you. He assumes it's because you're actually nice to him and he's not been around a woman in god knows how long. You're not womanly-like in the slightest but Heavy likes to think about his hands on your hips as he makes you whine.
Feels a stinging sense of guilt afterwards but generally shrugs the feeling off. It's not really such a bad thing if he keeps it to himself and keeps everything professional, right?
Sniper
I wrote a fic about how I generally feel Sniper jerks it here but I'll rephrase it here as a TLDR
This man is really fucking weird about jerking off to you. He HAS stolen something of yours to smell and fantasize with and if given the chance he WILL steal again.
HUGE scent kink and voyeur/creeping kink kind of like Engie in a way where he wants you to call him out on his bullshit.
Probably the most unprofessional about it. He has fondled himself as he watched you through his scope during battle and he will do it again.
Pretty quick ordeal overall to keep himself sane. He jacks off often and quickly to keep a baseline sense of sanity (pre-nut insanity is a thing and his diagnosis is terminal RIP)
Medic
Honestly I headcanon Medic not feeling a need to masturbate. His lust for you oozes out in his operations in some sort of gorey satisfaction in operations on the team. (think like, the taboo passion of physically rearranging someone's guts gets him off in a weird way.)
This isn't to say he gets sexually aroused by his experiments, it's just that the excitement of the thrills get cross-wired in his brain. When you drop your shirt on the floor to prep for an operation his dick twitches in his pants but that's literally it.
Flirts with you on the operating table <3
The only time he's actually masturbated is for experiements. (One was if he could create life without an egg and the second was to see how much cum could a healthy man extract out of him.)
Spy
This man is so hoity-toity about getting off it's almost a pain to write. It's an actual whole night for him. It starts with a nice bath with oils more expensive than your paycheck, then a professional massage, then a calming cigarette mixed with some top-grade cannabis in either a blunt or in a nice dessert. THEN FINALLY he lays himself down onto his pretty little bed and fucks himself.
And even then Spy has a routine to jerking off to really indulge himself. He starts slow and gentle with teasing touches that go lower and lower until he's strained against the fluffy bathrobe he is cuddled in.
Imagines you riding him a lot, but if he's in the mood to bottom, he slowly fucks himself with a pretty nice vibrator as he imagines you fucking him as your dick brushed against his prostate in the most delicious of ways.
This man is convinced that every other merc assumed that he gets too many bitches to need to masturbate and he fully intends to keep that assumption alive and well.
677 notes · View notes
mcshizzle-the-fire-boy · 8 months ago
Text
pjo characters as weird and dumb things me and my friends have said
Percy: what the fuck is cockblocking like I can't block ur cock on Snapchat
-
Will: UUUUUUUGH MY ASS HURTS- ooh look a butterfly
-
Leo: I CANT FIND MY PRETTY STICKER- AW FUCK- SHIT- MY VAGINA- OOAOoOoOOooAHAHHAgh
-
Jason: I can't actually believe I just agreed with you but hey here we are
-
Reyna: why the fuck am I friends with any of you hoes
-
Piper: should I...? too late I did it
-
Will: the best way to rizz someone up is by rizzing them up *turns to friend, winks horribly* hey baby girl
-
Rachel: one sec getting my anger out *aggressively splatters paint on canvas*
-
Annabeth: sometimes I'm smart. When I'm smart, I'm smart. *awkward thumbs up and grimace*
-
Octavian: fuck the gays they should all die ... I mean I could fuck some gays
-
Hazel: I'll make you tea but not in a sweet way I'll make it so hot in burns your tongue and you can't speak for a week
-
Frank: hey guys check me out I'm a furry on drugs *WOOOF WOOF BARK BARK BARK WOOF WOOF*
-
Grover: I love plants :3 specifically magic mushrooms but like
-
Leo: I mean I would totally fuck you but like respect man
-
Will: Ugh fuck my life I hate everything *coldplay starts playing* I retract the previous statement I fucking love life
-
Jason: UGH UR ALL SO DUMB but I'm in
-
Nico: if u wanna kys clap ur hands *rapidly claps hands*
-
Piper: *hypnotizes u with my beautiful blue orbs* come over to my house
-
Hazel: respectfully hope you die <3
-
Frank: I'm on acid what's it called when a ton of cats jump on each other a dog pile or a cat pile
-
Reyna: OH THANK GOD- sike I don't believe in that motherfucker hahahha
-
Annabeth: I'm so smart *holds up the one good test I got in school* see the teacher even gave me an 11/10 because I wrote my name in a cool font
-
Leo: UUUUUGGGGGHHHH IM SO HORNY- *mom walks in* oh hi mom how are you
-
Will: we can just... fuck. as friends though no homo.
-
Rachel: IF I DON'T DRAW SOMETHING IN THE NEXT FEW MINUTES I AM GOING TO MAUL SOMEONE
-
Octavian: you all suck and I hate you *silence* no wait come back
-
Someone: haha ur gay
Nico: yeah??? and ur not?? like don't knock it until you try it dick is yummy man
-
Hazel: someone just told me what smearing is and honestly I kinda wanna die *fix you by coldplay starts playing* LMAO WTF
-
Frank: you sad ass emo dog just be happy
-
Percy: I Am OnE wiTh ThE oCeAn AnD HopEfuLLy aLL oF ThE hOt MerPeOpLe In iT
-
Leo: *talking to literally nobody* hey guys!! gonna go get my top surgery! *shows up at claires*
-
Reyna: I only wanna die sometimes and that's normal right
RIGHT
-
Will: *playing guitar* haha look guys I'm fingering A minor *strums violently*
-
Jason: screw men *eyes widen* I should start taking my own advice ngl
-
Will: *listening to a playlist that Nico made him* ugh my emo ass boyfriend and his stupid music I hate him *proceeds to write his name over and over again in diary with hearts around it*
-
Nico: what if I strangle someone with a pair of earbuds
Will: please don't
-
Leo: *in demonic voice* LeAf *eats it*
-
Nico: *pulls gay flag out of pocket* omg it's u
Will: *shuffles around in pocket, finds condom* ... it's u, vanilla flavoured
-
Leo: my name's Leo
Percy: and I like jugs
Nico: I'm mentally ill
Leo: and I'm on drugs :D
-
Jason: is there anything better than pussy
Piper: I thought you where gay
Jason:
Jason: my boyfriend's trans?
-
Will: the temptation to fuck an emo boy rn is killing me
-
Leo: the masculine urge to
Leo:
Leo: I forgor
-
Will: that's good!
Nico: like me in bed
*silence*
-
Leo: smash or pass Ryan Gosling
Nico: SMASH
Will: PASS
Solangelo: *glares at each other*
-
Nico: omg stop with that song
Will: but
Will: but you can take me hot to go :(
-
Annabeth: yeah
Percy: yeah
Annabeth: *in funny voice* yeah
Percy *hentai moan* yEEEAAAaaH
-
Leo: *pointing at Nico* EEEEEEWWWW AN EMOOOOOO EWWW
-
Jason: never ever look up what an eyesha erotica lyric means
Reyna:
Reyna: oh you poor soul *pats back*
-
Nico: I can't breathe
Will: just
Will: breathe air
Nico: I breathe drugs
-
Piper: I'm gonna go play basketball
Leo: haha play with my balls
Jason: already do
Leo: *chokes on air*
well that's all sorry for the torture, thanks to @localcosplaymushroom, @crowwolf8, @justagremlinoncaffeine, and @secret-mewtwo for all of the funny convos that went into this
250 notes · View notes
cowboyjen68 · 1 year ago
Note
Hi!!
I just wanted to ask some advice from one butch to another.
I recently got my dream job of being a warden on a nature reserve (and i love it!), while interacting with people there I get called a young man very often (i am 18 lol) and it gives me euphoria to know im masculine enough to even pass as a man. I've also had some volunteers ask if I was a man or not (despite my feminine name).
But recently I got called a "lady" outside while out with my mother. It drove me INSANE I cried alot.
Don't get me wrong I do identify as a woman but I hate being seen as a lady.
I've even thought about using he/him pronouns recently and changing my name but i'm too scared to as most people won't understand bc im still a lesbian.
Is this strange?
ps love u and ur blog lots xx
This is an easy answer because I was 18 once and looked enough like a teenage boy that I got "hey sport" and "hey young man" all the time, especially when in my work clothes. I worked for The Mayor's Youth Corp in Iowa City in the summers of my 15th and 16th year. Mom and Dad let me get a work permit AND bought me a used Datsun Pickup so I could drive myself the 20 miles there and back each day.
I was a volunteer with the Corp of Engineers youth from 14 to 16 and Dad knew I was super excited about this job. Mom was not thrilled that I wanted to cut my hair but my "grand mullet" was really hot under the hard hat in the summer heat of Iowa. (in the 1980's boys and girls had the short in front long and permed in back look) We compromised and I cut the sides really short. (photo of my me at 16 in my uniform for reference)
Using "he" would never have occurred to me because "EWWW Boys". This is not to say, however, that I hated being mistaken for a boy, on the contrary, it felt good. When someone thought I was a young man it meant they treated me as such. They didn't talk down to me, I knew they assumed I was capable and willing to get dirty. I knew unconsiously that along with the mistaken identity came many perks. This was nothing I analyzed but little girls see very early on the difference in treatment they recieve from their brothers, male cousins and neighborhood boys. This difference leads us to become negotiators to control our circumstances and not entittled to treatment based on our skills and actual personalies.
When an adult recognized me as a boy, even for a second at first glance, I knew I didn't have to prove myself. They, for an instant, assigned to me words like "strong, capable, demanding etc". No negotations required.
When someone realized I was a girl they literally had a change in their face. They smiled at me, softened their voice. When I was called "young lady" or "Miss" it always seemed to be backed my the worst assumptions (in my mind anyway). Lady is steeped in all kinds of traits I didnt want assigned to me. "quiet, weak, likes to dress pretty"OR "motherly, submissive, meek" Nothing good in my teen brain, that is for sure. Lady felt so OLD, so married to a man and reliant on him for survival, so polyster pants and ugly flats and scratchy blouses with a flower imprint. NONE of these things are inherent to being a woman or even socially forced on us but that is not how things work sometimes. Words that describe people get stereotypes and myths and traits attached to them all the time. Woman and girl are no different.
I can tell you, the best feeling in the world when I was in that job was when my supervisor, who damn well knew I was a young woman, trusted me with all the same tasks as the boys. Who valued my opinions and abilities equally to the young men. He took time to teach me what I didn't know, just like with them and didn't assume I couldn't or didn't want to learn things on the job. He didn't shame ANYONE for not being strong enough or for getting tired or needing a break.
Don't let the assumptions of others force you into another box of conformity. You don't need a boys name or to use any pronouns you don't feel connected to just to please others. In fact, none of that effort will change perceptions of those around you. I can promise that one day being called Lady will just be another word that you can hear and know it does not change your personality or your interests or control the hope you have for your future. What does waste a lot of time and energy is trying to adjust things in your life to fit incorrect or snap assumptions about you as a person. You can never control the thoughts of those around you but what you can do is stop worrying about it and enjoy YOU.
You have a job you love and are sure to thrive in. You are solid in your sexuality and love of women, you are in a unique position to possibly change the perceptions of others when they think of "young women". Your interactions with the public are sure to effect the assumpions of at least some people when they think of young women and their roles in our society.
Congratulations on your new career and I bet you rock that uniform.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
404 notes · View notes