#someone better do that shit before I do
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Someone needs to make those funny text message things but with Baki characters, I don’t know how to do that shi but once I learn…👹
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Sometimes at work it's not my place to tell people the things I want to say, and I find I often go home at the end of the rougher days to stand blankly in my shower and tell myself over and over what I wish I could pass on.
This accomplishes very little, and mostly just gives me a tension headache, but through it all I think I've narrowed myself down to a few solid things I'd like to tell people the most.
You can't change people. Not permanently, not for anythig. You can support them, encourage them, love them, give them tools and opportunities and resources, but you can't make them change. They can change themselves if they want to, but they have to want to, and they have to want it for themselves, because they're the only one that's certain to be with them forever.
For better or worse, you make your own choices, and blaming bad choices on others doesn't only work to absolve you of responsibility- it also robs you of control. Because if you say you only did something because I did something, then you arent only shifting blame- you're admitting that you cannot control yourself, that you cannot truly make choices for yourself, that other people can control you- and as long as you truly beleive that, you'll keep facing the same problems over and over. You'll keep letting others dictate your choices, because you'll beleive that they can, and you'll never be free.
White knights on horseback are from fairytales. Nobody can help you if ou're not willing to help yourself. To try, to put the dirty work in, to belive you're worth that effort- Act as though nobody is coming to save you. From a struggle, from pain, from bad relationships, from yourself. And when you do save yourself, because you will, because failure here isn't an option if you want to survive, you'll never find another dragon that can keep you prisoner.
Don't say anything to anyone that you wouldn't want them remembering forever.
Doing the right thing in bad circumstances is hard. It's the hardest thing. But if you make the choice to do that hard thing anyways, despite your fear, you'll go on the rest of your like knowing that you're the sort of person who did something.
The present only seems the hardest because the past I over and the future hasn't happened.
There's so much joy ahead of you, the kind you can't possibly understand until you see it yourself.
The responsibility of consequences is often disguised as the power of permission. "I won't do this if you help me", "I'll work on my anger if you do this for me", "I promised you I'd quit, but can I have just one?". The unspoken question is, "Can it be your fault if this goes badly?"
You cant make someone love you the way you need to be loved. Someone can love you very much and still be bad for you, even if you love them very much in return. Two people can love each other very, very much, and try their very best, and still be wrong for each other.
Sometimes being near to someone changes you, even in good ways, and the people you become don't fit together as well as the people you were.
Caring takes work. Even if it's real. Especially if it's real. And the most important gestures aren't the grand, poetic, songs-and-flowers-and-tears moments; they're getting out of bed even though you don't want to. Paying attention to things you don't enjoy. Scrubbing pans, or opening a window, saying "thank-you", or helping carry groceries into the house. The small things fill the big things- without the small, boring, mediocre things, big things feel hollow.
Thrre is honour and dignity in humble work.
If you are a cruel and spiteful person, then you will find every place you visit to be full of the same cruel, spiteful people. This is not because the world is as cruel as you, but because everywhere you are, you will be disliked. This is the curse that comes with being persistently cruel and spiteful.
If you are a kind and ppsitive person, you will repeatedly encounter kind and positive people, because as they grow familiar with you, they will be happier to have you near. This is the reward of being a kind and positive person.
When splitting paths with loved ones, briefly or forever, aim for your last words to always be "I love you".
#I'm still so young and ignorant#but I wish someone had told ME these things before I had to learn them#And now when shit goes south and everything is over and calm again the same things just roll though my head#Over and over and over#It's like everyone I meet has the same 3 problems and its ruining their lives#I just want to take everyone I meet by the shoulders and shake them#I KNOW why this is happening to you#Do you realize you can be better?#Do you realize you can do it?#Aren't you terrified of wasting your life like this?#*I* want to be happier#*I* used to be so much worse than I am#And I don't have it all figured out#But if we all decide to help ourselves then it'll be that much easier to help each other#Right?#It's so hard to lift dead weight#You need to kick against the waves with me#You need to WANT to float#Do you understand#Ugh it's 6am#This has been your overdramatic midnight ramble#Imma grill me a cheese and go back to bed#Blaurfhgh
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so uh
for 1. most people are gonna take advantage of black friday and wont see your specific niche tumblr post, I hate to say it
2. the us isnt running out of money for war any time soon, so...
3. this is just antisemitism???????? all we need is some (((echoes))) around the us and israel and then I'd have no reason to suspect otherwise from op...............
#why in tf do you think they care that much about getting your money rn and not before in any other war?#does it. mayhaps. have something to do w jewish people being involved now?#our tax dollars go to the govt regardless and has been for years and we already have an obscene amount of funding for military shit#preeetty sure they're not concerned about getting a couple hundred tumblr users money...#and also pretty sure one could only believe that if they're paranoid about jewish ppl.................#hard not to put two and two together and figure out op is prolly antisemitic and hopefully they just dont realize it#i say hopefully they dont realize it bc thats better than someone who knows and is pretending to be a leftist still.#if anything this pause happened bc its thanksgiving and biden doesnt wanna think about it over the holidays. thats p much it.#thats the only amount of conspiracy theory im willing to believe in this situation lmao.#but that ^ still assumes that biden has some sort of control over this that he really doesnt#and i dont think netanyahu cares that much about thanksgiving tbr...#it sounds more like to me that op is seeing this from a very american centric pov and assumes everyone celebrates thanksgiving#or cares enough about it to remember the dates.... i dont think this is as planned as op is making it out to be and any insinuation#that it IS planned sounds like conspiracy theory talk to me personally. i dont think biden is hittin netanyahu up and going#'hey thursday is thanksgiving and would be the perfect time to pause so we can (((get peoples money))) out of them#asiftheUSdoesnthaveplentyalready' like i just really dont think that convo is happening lmao.
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I think Orym's position here is such a great one to depict, because the reality of any form of political organizing you will find someone who will not budge. This is fundamentally neutral, though someone like this can certainly have a position you find repugnant. It doesn't matter. This is the reality of dealing with that person. If someone will under no circumstances change their position - especially if it's informed by personal experience - that doesn't mean they are a good or bad person or their position is justified or not, but it does mean that to get them on your side, either you will have to find a way to appeal to them, not the other way around, or you will have to move forward without their support.
When encountering someone like this, you can bang your head against the brick wall and tell them about the superiority of your position for as long as you want, but unless you dip into threats and coercion or worse, you really cannot make them do anything they don't want to, no matter how eloquently you speak. There's considerable power in being that person.
(For what it's worth, I think he's perhaps the truest foil to Ludinus in this respect; I believe Ludinus's beliefs to be just as deeply ingrained and immutable. The key difference is that Orym is not in any way responsible for the death of Ludinus's family, or like, Molaesmyr, so when they move into the moral part of the argument instead of simply the blunt reality of unmoving objects, he does have a significant advantage.)
#my feeling re: bringing up will and derrig is that if the conversation can be shut down by that it should be shut down#if someone else has greater conviction in ludinus's position then by all means speak up. you can talk over him.#slash. have that conversation without him there. liam's got a backup character. orym can leave if bells hells decides to go vanguard#he's not precious about characters he'd do it#anyway i imagine after leaving ludinus was like well shit i fucked that up beyond repair before even knowing i had#and i better go with my contingencies bc somehow the two ruidusborn have found someone who will defend them unto death against me#which is very funny for me. maybe you could have gotten it all if you hadn't called a hit on Keyleth. but you did!#cr spoilers#absolutely incredible to demonstrate tanking but like. in conversation.
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Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.
The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.
It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.
In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.
#in short Jimmy doesnt only care about Curly#he only cares about the securtiy that Curly provides him#and i headcanon that the reason he tried to kill everyone is because he knew it was only a matter of time befor Curly realized this wasnt#somethgin benign Jimmy did that he could smooth over but somethign that Curly would repremand and condem him for and take his security away#like yes Curly did not react fast enough or strongly enough to what Anya told him but you could see him showing more concern over it as I d#understand the psychology behind people and more specifically men like Curly as he is hearing something horrible his friend did to someone#he cares about but has less of a bond with. he feels the need to protect his crew as people first and sadly Jimmy is still the person he wa#closest too yet I still think everything happened too fast for Curly to process as would you not grapple with the fact your closest friend#is a monster you must personally deal with? or that he did something so vile to someone else you have become protective over? Would you not#think of the relative power that friend holds and how if you approuch this wrong it could end badly for everyone? He had all these thoughts#but not enough time to think about them. Also how Jimmy was one of the main people in his personal life he felt a need to protect seeing as#he got him this job. Like imagine the one person you are really trying to make good is still bad after everythign and now you have to be th#hand of judgment youve shielded them from for so long like I do not think Curly handeled the initial situation with Anya correctly I dont#think it was the case of him not believing but not really knowing what to do and feel about it as a friend of both parties the captain and#guy going through his own shit and it says so much that he was dealing with all that so well compared to Jimmy who got everyone killed cuz#he thought being captain would be like sitting on the thrown and not emotionally mentally and physically taxing like I cant say Curly is th#best person due to his inaction but he is a good person doing the best with the knowledge and shitty resources he has cuz like also Id just#be terrified that my suicidal and nilihst bestie who clearly has an inferiority complex around me is the copilot who has access to the most#to the most important parts of the ship and the means to kill us all if he feels like him or his security are being threatened like#Anya and Curly just deserved better because they get put through the ringer like just put him in a class to teach him to be less trusting#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing jimmy#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!
#i have had this stupid fucking rule for myself for years since i was little#''dont speak unless you're spoken to or else something bad will happen. nobody wants to hear what you have to say unless they ask''#I TELL MYSELF THAT ALL THE TIME????#AND I DIDNT REALIZE IT WASNT NORMAL#thats not something that healthy people think to themselves whenever they want to talk to people. they just talk to them#they dont tell themselves not to speak to people for fear of what may happen to them jesus christ spacie#i get so scared when i message anybody ANYTHING#bc everything and anything i wanna talk about feels so stupid why would anyone give a shit#staring at a funny joke i want to send someone for 30 fucking minutes before deleting it b/c my brain is like ''errmm who cares?''#''also they're going to yell at you for wasting their time!!!''#i sent my friend a meme once and had a panic attack (or maybe a flashback?? im still trying to figure out what they are) immediately after#this shit sucks dude. it sucks#at least im processing what happened to me. thats why it hurts so bad rn its been stockpiled for like.#2 decades#im not looking for any sympathy here im just putting it out there#so that anybody who feels the same way i do know they're not alone#ive been struggling everyday for like 2 months now (actually DEFINITELY longer)#it will get better. things just need to be taken one step at a time#i have gotten thru my worst days i have a 100% success rate#how many days have i been alive#7930#lightwork#lets keep it goin#vent#trauma tw#trauma mention#wrote this post thru a flashback btw!! dealing with them is getting easier#before i would be unable to function for days at a time!!!#with one of the most recent ones i had i was so in the thick of it i avoided everyone i knew for a week cuz i was convinced#i was an evil unlovable freak that only wanted to hurt people
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y'all go from being feminists to tearing these women down within seconds oh my god it's 2024 can we please stop viciously tearing one woman down to bring another up i don't care what side you take but saying vile shit about either woman and their music is disgusting, please grow up
#seperate the art from the artist please oh my god#for the record i like both billie and taylor#the variants being a major thing but i know thats not to hurt billie like yall say its it's to get more money (which she doesn't need????)#like let people have opinions oh my god its not that deep#and some of yall (not naming names yk who you are) went from loving billies new album to saying the most vile shit within a second which is#+shallow as fuck please learn to separate the art from the artist#you're allowed to dislike someones music but dragging them down as a person is shameful and not something to be proud of#and some of the shit ive seen said recently is disgusting please think before you speak#and ill be honest the swifties are saying most of the horrible stuff#i love taylor as much as you guys but it is not an excuse to say disgusting shit about other women please find something better to do+#+with your time#most of my mutuals are swifties but tbh if youre offended by me saying not to drag women down then i don't want you following me anyways#luc posts#billie eilish#taylor swift#i will not rant about my hatred for the variants and consumerism thats a post for another day#also have yall considered that this whole argument thing is pr so they can both get more streams. bc uh that was my first thought ngl#edit like 10 minutes later: i read an article and yall are blowing shit out of proportion it is literally not that deep omg
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Genuinely so curious who Mike thinks is gonna be buying The Cage or the new DCTL GN bc with the way he tweets as far as he's concerned, it's not gonna be:
The queer people he has actively admitted he will never show any representation of in the games.
2. The POC he has actively fought against representing in his franchise. [Who he also mocked for thinking they would be represented in his franchise]
3. The Bendy fandom which has always been concerned with topics of diversity esp in the sense of queer people since its creation. Who he has responded to really poorly esp in regards to the GN.
4. The fans who critique him. [He blocked me for doing so lol]
5. His fans in general who he tweets about like this currently. [He's being vague about why people were mad at him or sent him 'nasty messages' because if you actually looked into why you'd see he was in the wrong. Either way, a very hateful way to speak abt ur own fanbase.]
Reminder while Mike is trash talking his fans he has always treated them rather poorly. The fans who won the fanart contest for Chapter 5 never got their posters actually in game due to it being rushed. Not only was chapter 5 a big slap to the face story wise, but it was literally so rushed he couldn't be bothered to add in the art his fans gave him for his game FOR FREE. [Meatly blames this on a crazy timeline, reminder him and Mike are the literal ceos of this company. The proposal of future updates here is also pretty cruel considering Mike nowadays happily admits he corrupted Chapter 5's source code and therefore literally can't update it At All currently. Because he is a moron]
At least they got to be in Boris and the dark survival, and by that I mean that was the Only game they got to be in so far, isn't that just treating your fans like you love them? Shoving their hard work into a spin off game almost nobody has played or addresses much. [Hell, who knows if with the Lone Wolf rebrand they'll even stay there. In which case they'll be in None of the games, only in the credits of BATIM]
6. The Bendy fans who just generally disagree with him on stuff. Like the new ink demon design where there is literally a public poll showing people generally prefer the old one.
7. The Bendy fans who can see he is actively lying to them. To their fucking faces.
He says this has always been the case, but screenshots and links to tweets regarding the books being canon prove it was not. Does he really think bendy fans are stupid or something? [Unless he's admitting here he lied to Kress when he told her the books were canon which sounds worse!]
8. Anyone who doesn't like the idea of giving money to a guy who laid off tons of employees then afterwards thought it was a great idea to express his anti-union views! Also brag about how good of an employer he was, according to his employees, he was not!
So in summary; Mike is an awful person who has not learned anything from the awful things he did. I will not be purchasing The Cage because, combined with this and his absolute refusal to take any kind of critique or see any differing interpretation of his franchise, I have no reason to think my problems with the franchise will ever be addressed or fixed. I probably will pirate The Cage along with any future Bendy Products [Including the movie] and will do my best to avoid giving it any kind of monetary support. Unless this changes any time soon, I can't see myself making anymore positive Bendy posts soon.
Mike has just managed to make it so hard to speak positively or optimistically of this franchise when he's so willing to broadcast how little he cares about it or its fans. I'm at the point where I refuse to pull any of my punches with my problems with it. What's the point of trying to play nice with my critique when either way the people creating it don't care?
So with this post, I want to invite anyone who feels similarly about the franchise to tell me, make a post or send an ask talking about how all of this makes you feel. It may not change how things are, but genuinely seeing other people share my feelings of anger makes me feel better. It feels nice to see when other people share our same concerns and worries. I'd also love to know if anyone else thinks they'll be avoiding purchasing Bendy products over this.
I'm not forcing anyone to participate in it nor trying to say anyone who doesn't supports mike but genuinely maybe if we can collectively decide to boycott things like the movie, graphic novel and The Cage... It might at least make the bendy devs acknowledge how much they have destroyed their own fandom's faith and trust in them.
The way Mike tweets about his actions like he had no control over why people were mad at him at least proves to me he takes NONE of it back nor regrets it. If you didn't know about his actions and only went off his tweets, you would be led to believe Mike has been needlessly picked apart by fans over things he couldn't control [or in his own words, had his words twisted and taken out of context]. That is not how you speak about your actions if you have actually learned better from them.
anyway, that has been my bendy dev callout post. This is an open invitation to anyone feeling similarly upset about the way the franchise is going to talk about it. It's genuinely nice to see how people feel about this and the more we talk about the more it's likely the bendy devs are forced to address our concerns. I don't think they will but hey, that's why I'm not gonna support them with my money anymore nor am I gonna be nice to them in any content I make critiquing Bendy. I mean I'm also basically making this post just in case anyone asks me Why I feel this way towards to bendy devs/as a way to respond to anyone who thinks I am too harsh in my critique in the future.
As always, it seems the best part of Bendy isn't actually anything about canon but about what the fan's are creating with the ideas Bendy failed to do anything interesting with.
Also the books, the books slap.
#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#ramblez#bendy and the silent city#bendy the cage#for the record another reason Im making this post is bc some of the only good resources to learn abt why the bendy devs suck are some old#very longer videos and this is a very long post but I thought it was important to document the recent shit theyve been doing alongside some#of the worst past things theyve done bc Mike has been trying to misinform people on what happened but those videos are still great resource#if you want more info n such#long post#mike D#for anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt him since he doesnt go by mood anymore#sorry if this is rambley or emotional Im just so sick of these guys fr dskjhgskdfjghskdjhgkjhsd#I miss when I didnt spend my days stressed about the awful shit mike is gonna say next and how I would have to disprove it in a post later#or explain why its bad to have a cast of nothing but cishet white guys n constantly fight back against any push for diversity in said cast#genuinely its just tiring esp when u see other bendy fans give ignorant or very silly defenses/takes on those things#n then u lose a lot of respect for them bc they are speaking on stuff they dont know much abt so confidently and therefore misinforming#people or even encouraging very bad views on stuff like diversity n its importance#Im not saying people like that are bad people but it is stressful n upsetting when u see someone u thought knew better do that sort of thin#it makes it hard to trust them again on other issues bc u now dont trust they know what they r talking abt!!#like please think twice before telling young artists making norman white was a tough and complicated decision it was fucking not the bendy#devs just think all their humans are white by default and dont wanna change that its been proven time n time again thats all it is#and defending them just bc u like a franchise they made is very very bad!! They are not ur friends!! they suck and we seriously need to#stop pretending they dont!! toxic positivity is only gonna make the fandom an absolute nightmare its not gonna make ANYTHING better#it just means people will be forced to PRETEND they never have negative thoughts abt the franchise n therefore make them burned out#just look at other similar fandoms please lets not make those same mistakes!!#sorry can u tell Ive been having just. A time recently#anyways back to making my queer ass bendy fan game full of so much diversity mike will prolly shit when he sees it DKFJGHKSDJHGKJHSD
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Do you guys remember the first time you read/watched Harry Potter and thought Snape was responsible for everything only to be hit in the stomach when you found out alongside the characters it was Quirrell all along?
Do you remember reading about Sirius Black escaping jail and wanting to murder Harry and do you remember being ready to throw hands at him? And then do you remember that sinking feeling when you realized he’d been wrongfully imprisoned for twelve years and was painted as the guilty one when it was Peter all along?
Do you remember hearing about the death eater Regulus Black, following in Voldemorts’ footsteps only to be hit with the crushing truth later, that he’d betrayed him and died doing so and no one knew about it and you had, yet again, judged him too harshly?
Do you remember hating Draco and progressively coming to understand the circumstances that led him to that?
Do you remember loving Dumbledore and realizing suddenly how badly he wronged Harry?
Do you ever think about those moments, and how we all judged those characters and fell into the easy trap? Time and time again? How easy it was to gulp down one version and not realize how biased it was?
I feel like if there’s one thing those books taught me it was to never get along with one version of a story. You can’t hear one side and admit it’s the final truth. You can’t judge someone through one lens and not admit it’s skewed. You can’t erase circumstances. You can’t shut out the other side of a story because one is sufficient for you.
If you want to crucify someone for something they did, remember all those times you were ready to crucify Snape, Sirius, Regulus, Draco and so on.
I’m not against holding people accountable for their actions, but I don’t want to get that sinking feeling of guilt that I had with characters on real human beings. And it is inhuman to hold one thing against someone’s head forever—especially when you don’t know the whole story.
We all make mistakes, we all fuck up, and we also, all have our own truth. And we’re also all capable of empathy towards others. 🖤
God knows I hate jkr with a passion but fuck if I love the message that was spread through those arcs.
#also yes I see the snape haters ready to come at me#im not saying he’s flawless but I AM saying we judge too harshly and hp def taught us that#and I’ve seen it sooo much irl#and I feel like cancel culture pushes us into that even more than before#nobody gives a shit abt the other side of the story they’re so quick to throw hands and point fingers#which#pls be careful#there are HUMANS behind your screen#you never know what someone else is dealing with#and you never know their side#please please remember that#anyway FUCK JKR#but those books do hit smh#anti cancel culture#fandom#harry potter#Sirius deserved better#I’ll never get over it#anyway love and peace as always <3#fandom is full of kind and respectful empathetic people and I love them#fandom police#fandom discourse#proship#stan culture#sirius black#regulus black#snape#draco malfoy
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09 soapghost au, ghost was a member of soap’s unit before roba and they were together until he was taken. when he comes back and takes up the ghost mantle, simon riley is declared KIA and the hope that soap had let kindle in his heart that he’d come back to him dies. he throws himself into training, into becoming captain so he won’t let down another soldier the way he let simon down
then he recruits ghost to the 141 and ghost sees how much he’s changed, how much harder he is; slow to smile, never relaxing and he realises how much he fucked up by never reaching out. he’d thought he’d be better off without him, without the shell of the man he used to love but he’d done nothing but hurt him
after the close call with shepherd, soap wants to get right back into it, wants to hunt makarov down for almost getting his sergeant and lieutenant killed and ghost is yelling at him to just take it easy and heal first when soap snaps back, “i can’t lose anyone else! not again!” and ghost just rips his balaclava off, showing his face for the first time in years…
and soap says nothing. he just looks at him, completely unreadable. ghost clenches the balaclava in his hand, waiting for anything; even injured, soap can still pack a mean punch and he’s waiting for it, almost hoping for it… but he still does nothing. just stares
“well? c’mon!” he growls, stalking in closer. “let me have it! tell me how pissed you are! that i left you alone! that i ruined you the moment i touched you! that you regret ever fucking looking at me! scream, shout, say something!” until he’s leaning over soap’s chair, chest heaving
soap’s hand lifts and ghost can’t help his flinch before planting himself, ready to be struck, longing for it, to be punished the way he punishes himself-
soap’s hand gently cups his cheek and he freezes, breath catching as his thumb caresses the snake bite scars on his lip; feather-light and reverent. just like he used to
“you’re as beautiful as the day i lost you”
#i am not immune to the romantic scene of all time ft mr stoic how to train your dragon 2#og soap is Young for a captain#like even if we arent given a canon age hes still like 30s maybe 40s if were pushing it#i dont know a lot about military shit but that seems young to me#so just soap who let himself become cold and focused everything on forcing himself to be better faster strong to protect everyone#until he finds himself as a captain of his own elite unit#handpicking men#and if he loses a single one it will be unequivocally his fault bc he chose them to be here#even ghost#this man that has no history beyond a few years of military service#no name no family even getting his blood type out of him was like pulling teeth#but sometimes#sometimes his complaints ring just a little too familiar#the way he holds himself tugging at his memory#even the way he idly flips a knife when waiting to be called in to interrogate someone#he doesnt dare to hope not when hope has never gotten him anywhere before#but then ghost takes the balaclava off and his walled off heart beats anew#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#talk to me ghost#soapghost#ghostsoap#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#soap cod#ghoap#09 soapghost#09 ghostsoap#save post
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“white mourning.”
#‘‘A white mourning. A modern death. Divorce or something similar. All you can do is put more distance between you & him. make him smaller.’’#jean is a very easy character to hate if you know nothing about him. & you know what they say. easy target doesn’t make for a good practice#judit literally compares harry to intellectually disabled man yet you don’t see ppl hating her because she is outwardly nice.#she’s polite yes but she doesn’t care as much as jean cares for harry#he is not perfect. he is mean. but loyal. if he truly didn't care he wouldn't hab come back to martinaise & coulda just reported harry’s as#he put up with du bois’ bullshit for years and built a toxic (totally straight) relationship with him yet always comes back.#he says he will leave you in the village to die but please understand harry isn't exactly a great person. especially pre-bender hdb.#planned a make up joke & put on a wig for hdb even tho he wasn’t the who started the whole fiasco#you can hate him all you want for leaving harry before & during tribunal but how could he have foreseen all this bullshit would have happen#his second leaving is kinda bullshit writing but#jv is dealing with his own demons too. clinical depression. partner almost died. job is shit. case spiraling out control#i do not blame the DE staff either. sometimes shit just happens. not everything needs a grand explanation.#but it definitely coulda been handled better. but i understand. resources were sparse.#i relate to jv. as someone with temper issues & attention problems i have to remove myself from the scene or i'll say shit i'd regret late#my man is having the worst week of his life. leave him alone.#kim is great but have u heard of a man who thinks he's old when he is only 30 & luvs horses & his commie boyfriend that he's divorcin' soon#disco elysium#de fanart#jean vicquemare#disco elysium fanart#jean heron vicquemare#jean posting#illustration#de#artists on tumblr#I WANTED TO DRAW THIS FOR MONTHSSS YOU COULDN'T IMAGINE. HE LITERALLY HAUNTED ME IN MY SLEEP!!!#i love him normal amount. very healthy. much feelings#my little maiu maiu#cryptiduni#my art
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"a dude in Texas legally changed his name to "Literally Anyone Else" and he's attempting to run for President against Biden & Trump" [source]
okay, but putting aside the comedic aspect of this, it is concerning the amount of people who are prompted to vote for candidates just because it's funny. I'm not the biggest fan of how his policy about the boarder sounds [Site], but I do implore anyone who is able to vote in the 2024 US election to please research other candidates.
The media is only going to continue pushing the idea it's inevitably going to be Trump vs Biden 2.0 and we have no other options, that we have to vote for Biden again because of Project 2025. Is that whole thing terrifying?
Yeah, fucking absolutely.
But voting for Biden will not solidify our safety from that. Biden is exactly like the rest of them. He always has been. You can't make the lesser of two evils argument when they're both just plain evil.
You cannot say that Biden is even mildly a better choice than Trump when he is currently directly involved in a genocide. That is not some little fucking thing. That in and of itself disqualifies him as a lesser evil. Biden is just as bad as him and he will not save us because he doesn't fucking care.
Cornel West [Site] is an Independent candidate running for President in the 2024 Election. [Policies]
Claudia De la Cruz and Karina Garcia [Site] are running for President and Vice-President as the candidates of the Party for Socialism and Liberation in the 2024 Election. [Policies]
There are options.
There are people trying to change the corrupt foundation our system is built on, but we have to help amplify them because the mainstream media will not.
#have you looked at what's happening in New York & the subways#There's so many reported shootings and deaths and it just seems to be getting worse.#I just looked up subway shooting ny because I wanted to check before saying something#There's reports from like 3 hours ago about someone getting pushed in front of one of the moving subways & there's so many others#or how about the like thousands of police officers that they've got stationed at subways in ny literally doing fuck all#or how everyone's going through a housing crisis and cant afford rent and cant get medical care because it can cost#$4000 to get a fucking ambulance and that's cheap. That's a ride to the hospital less than 20 minutes away probably.#or the rise in hate crimes and bigotry and all the shit they're now trying to censor with the kosa bill#or how terrifying places like Florida have became for anyone thats not seen as an equel by people who dont view most others as equels.#or how they're pouring billions into wars while we're in the midsts of a homeless crisis#suicide rates are at record levels in the us and it's only going to get worse. theyre pulling telehealth which will take away#life saving medical care for people who dont have the ability to go in person. people's ability to get therapy and meds being taken away#Is going to kill people. or how the Biden administration has fucked up their Covid response so goddamn badly#people are referring to the pandemic in past tense and have lost understanding for others who they'd have understood before#they've lied and they've concealed and its killing millions of people and disabling even more. but they will not take accountability.#long covid is ruining people's lives and they've successfully led the narrative that its not real or not that serious.#they will sit there and they will lie. they will say they've protected women's rights and that its a top priority.#they'll say that healthcare is a top priority but have suggested that they'd veto a healthcare for all bill because of its price tag#but will spend billions and billions and billions on a genocide that the majority is against. the system isn't going to begin collapsing#it already is.#its crumbled and we must demolish the corrupt remains and rebuild a better government that gives a shit about people#ALL people.#they use basic human rights as bargaining chips.#the Democrats and Republicans on a Venn diagram is a circle. wake up.
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Harassment is horrible, it's terrible mods in this Discord aren't doing anything.
But on the other hand, what about you? You harassed a person over *fanfiction* ( to the point it's the 4th tag who shows up on your blog ). Yet, all your harassment is still there out of the open. You haven't really seriously apologized, especially to them. You're still quite active on fe3h discourse while he had to remove himself from many public online space.
How is this fair?
You're rightfully upset about harassment towards members of your community, there should be *serious* amends made... But how can you hold double standards like that?
I haven't followed the discourse closely because it's so awful, why are you all so hateful? Because you just seems like one of the "bad guy" in this story along with Raxis and the other. I'm not saying you're the same, but you're not really better than those you criticize either, and the same apply for the other blog who participed in your harassment... It's just horrible all around. You're all drowning in a cesspool of toxicity and it's making you all worst people than you actually are.
I hope you, and people around you, will at least receive amend over the harm caused to them. I hope you stop receiving troll, death threat and any other type of hate message you probably still receive. But I hope you'll sincerely recognize your faults and fully amend to them too.
Look, I know you probably mean some kind of well and that you likely spent a long time thinking over this message, so I'm going to lay it out as simply as I can:
I have never once interacted with Cap'n himself, and I have repeatedly told anyone reading my posts to do the same. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who went out of their way to make sure we saw what they were saying about us. This includes publicly admitting to using alts to go around our blocks of them so that they can keep interacting with us directly
Very quickly into critiquing Cap'n's work, a primary focus became pointing out the problematic rhetoric he was spreading with his incredibly influential, incredibly popular fanfic. This includes the justification of holding racist rhetoric, the anti-miscegenation rhetoric, the infantilization of women, the demonization of men, the justification of imperialism, and more, all which appear very quickly into the story and stay prominent throughout the story. The people who have harassed me and others, meanwhile, either deny this rhetoric exists in their circles or outright hold this rhetoric themselves. This includes the use and defense of genocide apologetics.
This post is the first time I have talked about Cap'n in over a year, and the last time I posted any notes on his fic was over a year and a half ago. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have engaged in harassing behaviors as recently as this week (as of Aug 18 2024).
It has been explicitly said by those close to Cap'n that my notes, while upsetting him, had no part in him leaning away from social media more, unlike what you say here. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have driven off multiple people from social media and have openly patted themselves on the back for doing so, justifying their harassment by saying the people they've harassed off social media deserved it.
I have kept my critiques strictly on this Tumblr, as have most of the people who have talked about Cap'n's fic. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have spread their harassment on places such as Twitter, Reddit, and TVTropes.
I have refrained from ever accusing Cap'n of ever holding any bigoted views himself, and have made it a repeated point to say that his problematic writing is far more likely due to ignorance of the subjects involved rather than outright malice. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have accused many of us as people of being sexist, racist, homophobic, etc. based off of nothing. This includes accusing at least one of us of actual crimes against actual people with no proof and on multiple sites such as the popular and public Edelgard Discord and on Reddit.
People who said they were in contact with Cap'n (as in, mods of the Discord server that Cap'n was once in, the same server that has the mod that uses genocide apologetics) have been told that I was willing to remove parts of my notes that he found too attacking or harsh, and they've been told that I would outright remove all of my posts regarding Cap'n period if he would talk to me directly and we could discuss the implications and rhetoric he had accidentally written into his story. While I do understand him not wanting to do the latter (as it involves directly talking to me), he hadn't even done the former (which does not involve directly talking to me and only involves relaying messages through his friends). And with all of the above on top of that, it gives me the impression that he feels less like "this person is harassing me and that is giving my anxiety" and more "this person is critiquing me and I don't like that." While he has every right to feel the latter, we aren't going to sit here and say that's the same as the former.
So, nonnie, to answer why I am "hateful," as you put it: I don't like stories that unironically say being two races mean you don't belong to either race being influential in a fandom, as a mixed-race woman. I don't like stories that have characters of color only be used as props for the author's favorite little white girl to be influential in fandom, as a person of color. I don't like stories saying that women just want to go back to being innocent pure little girls and not be the wilted tainted flowers they are now to be influential in a fandom, as a woman. I don't like stories that lay the blame of all the world's suffering on the shoulders of a race of people who've barely survived a genocide to be influential in a fandom, as a person with a modicum of knowledge on where that rhetoric inevitably leads to. I don't like stories saying that men who don't bow down to women will almost certainly become rapist pigs or otherwise terrorizing monsters to be influential in a fandom, as someone who rejects sexism of all forms. I don't like stories that liken the violent conquests of imperialism to the blooming of flowers, or that say that imperialism is the only way for the "good" culture to help everyone - actual, genuine rhetoric used to justify actual, genuine imperialism - to be influential in a fandom, as someone who has read any history book ever.
And I don't like how all of this and more have clearly been normalized in big 3H fandom circles and how this has led to multiple people getting harassed, in no small part due to Cap'n's influence on the fandom at large.
I'm sorry if Cap'n doesn't like me pointing out the bigotry he had engraved throughout his story, and I'm sorry if I'm not going to be convinced that me doing that is the same as people's deliberate and long-standing attempts to chase people out of the fandom for saying they don't like Edelgard in the one way they allow anyone to like her, and I'm sorry that me calling out the racism people are engaging in and are hiding behind the shield of "discourse" seems to bother you so much, but I think I've explained why I'm not exactly that sorry well enough. Hope this answers your question <3
#ask#anon#o captain my captain#literally the last time i used that <- tag was in Feb 2023#and frankly given the shit Cap'n continued to write in his fic after Chapter 60 that's fucking saintly of me#anyway. to be clear; my critiquing Cap'n's fic and only Cap'n's fic for the bigoted shit he wrote in it#is not the same as Raxis harassing someone off of Tumblr for saying the wrong Lambert and Sitri opinions#or him cropping out people's messages to make it look like they said shit they never said to drum up harassment against them#or dolphin going to a Jewish woman's post and ''''''''joking'''''''' about genocide and race supremacy#or her accusing someone else of being a rapist and groomer on random Reddit posts and in a huge public Discord server#sorry for the snippy tone it's just this ignorant message is somewhat annoying ngl#not to be rude nonnie but you can't say you don't know much about what's been going on#and then make these definitive statements as though you DO know what's been going on#like you can call my notes gauche or uncalled for or whatever I don't give a shit#but it'll be a cold day in hell before I sit here and nod along with the idea of it being ''no better than'' this shit
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there’s probably something deeply wrong with me because every time i see someone react to the pok gukgak interrogation scene it’s like “oh no oh my god is riz’s dad a bad guy?” when the first time i saw that scene my only thought was “oh my god is riz’s dad HOT??”
#i mean admittedly my instinct was that he was lying about what he was saying & he was a good guy (which i was right about) but#it truly was like pok: i don’t give a shit about my wife & kid i only care about this job / me: pok gukgak save me… save me pok gukgak#fantasy high#dimension 20#pok gukgak#riz gukgak#in my defense i really love spies so watching someone convincingly act indifferent about the most important part of their life… CRAZYYY#but i still feel like i’m setting back feminism so many years but also. he got acid splashed on his face & didn’t even flinch… that’s hot#guy who would literally go through hell & back bc it’s for the greater good but would also if he had to do it for the people he loves#but like. the greater good always came before the people he loves. that was the job. he loved them so much but he also missed so much#how much WAS he willing to sacrifice for the sake of the job? work is a great form of love but it can’t be the only form#especially for a young kid. but yea idk i have complicated feelings#pok gukgak u r so fascinating to me#pok sklonda riz & work as a form of love or whatever#truly would not work as a campaign & would be better as a book but young pok young kalina young sklonda… i need to know EVERYTHINGGG#the shameful thirst post -> character rumination journey of these tags is truly Something but also par for the course w/ my brain
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i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.
what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.
in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?
obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)
#and this isnt getting into how trans mothwing outside of mothpool is a really good way to read her character#sorry. remembered the shit bonefall got despite being trans as well and got annoyed#that especially annoys me bc hes got plenty of surrogacies but the second hed touch a trans pregnancy#‘’no you cant do that!!! you freak!!! obviously you only see trans people as a loophole for gays to have babies!!!’’#also my gf and i were talking and obviously take this with a grain of salt bc this is our experience#but…. i think a lot of the ppl saying this……. havent really talked to trans women?#dude some of the ones i know LOVE the idea of getting people pregnant#did you know trans women have sex? did you know trans people in general have sex?? did you know trans people irl wanna start families?#did you know that? did you? or do you black out at the idea of a trans woman being anything but strictly pure and nonsexual#and OBVIOUSLY this is not every trans woman. some do have dysphoria around the idea#but im genuinely starting to wonder how these people act around irl transgender parents#whether they had kids before or after coming out#bc ngl. the attitude that thinking about this makes you a transphobic pervert?#directed at trans people making content for themselves?#im starting to think you all just dont want us to reproduce. if we reproduce we arent ‘’good’’ trans people#because a ‘’real’’ man wouldnt carry a child. a ‘’real’’ woman would carry the child. and god forbid the gays even THINK about reproducing#and being around children!#if we have children then we’re doing things that might make cishets look at us and declare we’re not perfect#we’ve proved we’re not just identical to cis ppl!! (and therefore deserving of respect!)#idk. i think this was mostly a case of tumblr going ‘’oh someone said no to this so lets push this to an unhealthy extreme!!’’#and i cant help but notice nobody really brings up nonbinary parents at all in this discussion#not that we have it ‘’better’’ or anything for that but yknow. are we supposed to swear it off?#is the idea of us having kids inconcievable? or worse…. does it mean we ‘’picked a side?’’#so its not even worth getting mad at a pregnant nb person bc ‘’well thats a woman so who cares’’b#HMMMMM.#ohhhh i bet they also get mad if you make transfem pregnancy possible too. no winning#idk really think about it when you go ‘’you can NEVER EVER portray a trans person starting a family. bc REAL trans people would never.’’#ohhh you probably get mad when trans ppl dont get surgery for one reason or another dontcha#whether we want to or its not in the cards for us for whatever reason like cost and such#(while also getting mad if we do bc we cannot win in this no matter what)
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when i say i ship asrian what i need you to understand is that i mean i want asra to apologize and beg for julian back. possibly in messy tears
#you can't convince me he wasn't the shittiest most manipulative awful boyfriend ever. no one understands me#as always debate and arguments are not welcome on my posts and you will be blocked#but like. listen ok. my headcanon is basically that they were fwb (for a rlly long time)#and julian fell in love with him because of course he did#and asra knew even before he ever admitted it because julian is obvious af#but asra was essentially just using julian and specifically dominating julian as an outlet to feel powerful#so the whole dynamic was basically humiliating for julian because they both knew that he loved asra and they both knew that asra#was using him for sex#but then asra actually did slowly start to fall in love with julian#which julian would obviously never notice because he hates himself#so it was pretty easy to hide. so asra hid it because he hated the thought of being vulnerable in front of julian#and then eventually let julian leave him with his whole dramatic shit of 'asra you deserve better'#and he couldn't say anything because he knew it was his fault#because that was what asra had made him believe#and then finds a way to twist it in his head to basically what he told mc in julian's route#that julian was 'deciding what's best for him'#instead of admitting that he was in love but he couldn't admit it because he thought he was above someone like julian#asrian#the arcana#wank //#<- i don't really see it as wank but i also really do not want asra stans bitching on my posts 🙏
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