#some examples of movies that make me believe these people are friends:
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randum-famdoms · 11 hours ago
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Prev’s tags are too interesting to lose
Also it’s not just tv; it’s movies too I think. Live action American sci-fi/action movies to be specific. I can only think of a couple made since streaming got big that I felt like I actually knew who the characters were, and liked them, and felt like they actually cared about each other. Other genres have this problem too (comedy comes to mind), but none so extreme as in action and sci-fi. Feels like lately it’s all just rewrites of the same script but with different set dressing and they forget that you also have to have characters, not just a half a concept and a tired plot with cgi sprinkles.
I know the characters’ names and maybe a motive if I’m lucky and that’s it. Then one of em dies or is kidnapped or whatever and the other characters are so heartbroken and like… did they even know each other? Cause they met like a day ago and haven’t had a single conversation longer than a couple minutes, and they only talked about Plot Things.
There are some standouts obviously, The Equaliser series comes to mind, but it’s the exception, not the norm
I don't know what those '90s sci Fi TV writers were putting in their shows but I wish they'd start doing it again
#I don’t really watch a ton of tv#but I rewatch shows A LOT#mainly ones from the 2000’s and 2010’s#ATLA and The Librarians are my favs but I also rewatch Castle and the Ziva seasons of NCIS a lot#and the latter two tend not to have filler episodes per day but they do have eps that focus more on the B-plots compared to usual#but like…. I’ve *tried* to get into more modern shows#trust me I TRIED#but they’re just so fucking serious about everything#it makes it hard to like any of the characters#like okay but when are you gonna tell me about yourself#oh nooo they have a tragic backstory and/or a job#cool but what do you do for fun? what Str your hobbies? what are you like when the world isn’t ending?#and for the love of GOD just fucking talk to someone about something that isn’t plotty#character A will be kidnapped and character B reacts like someone killed a dog in front of them#and I’m sitting there like ‘since when are you friends????’#I think that anime does a better job at capturing what used to make tv fun and good and enjoyable#while still having more variety in length#for example: Sk8 the infinity is short enough to watch in one sitting and still get groceries the same day#toilet bound hanako kun is a bit longer but still short#my hero academia is long#one piece is scary and probably a bigger file size than most video games in its entirety#the first two examples are also things I rewatch constantly (BNHA used to be but lately I’ve been not as obsessed)#and I’d like to say that movies aren’t exempt from this problem either#one could argue that the length makes it hard to flesh out relationships while still having a strong plot and I’d like to raise you:#animation.#some examples of movies that make me believe these people are friends:#rise of the guardians; SpiderMan: spiderverse (both movies); all the how to train your dragon movies; and more#but I’d be hard pressed to list many live action American movies off the top of my head; especially any made after streaming got popular#like yes there are a lot but compared to the vast number of movies being made?#especially action and sci-fi movies
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tender-rosiey · 1 year ago
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oh em gosh imagine gojo with an s/o who's basically as obsessed and in love with him as he is with us <33 and every1 is just like 😒ugh get a room
back and forth — gojo satoru x f!reader
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a/n: equally being obsessed with each other>>> also check out @novelbear her prompts are out of their world! I used some of the dialogue prompts hehe
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you would like to say that you’re immune to satoru’s charms, but then you would be a liar.
sometimes you, sure, can say no, but most of the time you indulge him. he uses his pretty face and even prettier words to get his way. it does reassure you that you have the same effect on him. actually, he can never say no to you.
he once sat with himself to think that maybe he is spoiling you, and he needs to stop, but then you entered the room beaming, smooching his face and asking to go to that one café that opened recently.
satoru’s original plan was to do the paperwork yaga has been yelling to him about, but how can he say no to you? so with a grin, he locked arms with you and the both of you skipped to the café.
so yeah, you’re both so down horrendous for each other and neither of you can deny it.
it’s terrible for everyone around you.
the way the both of you are screaming each other’s name from a mile away and running towards each other like you're in some romance movie. the hug is even more dramatic than the running, somehow.
the balant display of affection makes the students all roll their eyes.
one time, you called satoru from home and you had a call that lasted for an hour or so. eventually, you had to hang up since satoru had a class to teach. however, these goodbyes take even longer than the call itself.
“I love you, ‘toru!”
“I love you, my pretty angel!”
“I love you more, my lovely husband!”
“I love you even more, my divine wifey!”
and it continued like that forever. the students almost lost hope to get any education that day, but satoru finally said, “okay, pretty, I have to go now.”
they beam as they hear your voice replying with a sweet ‘okay!’, but they quickly deflated when satoru relaxed back and said, “but you have to hang up first.”
of course, what followed was a ‘no, you hang up first!’.
one and after another and nobara had enough before snatching satoru’s phone and instead speaking to you, “okay, y/n-sensei, we all love you, but we need this guy to teach us something so bye!”
satoru spent the entire day pouting.
another thing is how the both of you take pictures of the other while they are unaware. at first, you would think there is nothing wrong with it, and there isn’t.
but both of you love to fawn about the other in front of your students or friends.
satoru rambles with the most passionate and energetic fangirling ever to nanami, an audience that’s about to jump off a building, and you, who refuses to believe his beauty, ramble to shoko who’s about to finish 4 packs of cigarettes.
in general, satoru is a lot more brazen with his show of affection. for example, the way he shamelessly stares at you like he is memorizing your every feature.
sometimes, his hands wander to your face to gently caress it, then his lips follow, pressing a peck to every part of your face, drawing constellations of love. he then pulls back with a smile, “you’re really pretty, y’know?”
he always says what’s on his mind, and he is the type of lover to help you challenge your limits. he pays the people around him no mind as he pulls you in the rain with a grin, saying, “come on, dance with me!”
and you do your best. you’re both clumsy in your steps and you’re swaying more than dancing. satoru’s infinity is off and you’re both soaked.
still, satoru thinks you’ve never looked prettier, and you think his eyes never shone brighter.
there are times when words escape you before you think about them like that one time satoru was in a mini rush to go on a mission and forgot to give you a goodbye kiss. before he dashed out the door, you held him by the shirt and frowned, “my kiss?”
despite his blindfold, shock was evident on his face. he recovered quickly though. with a chuckle, he murmured a soft, “right sorry, wifey,” and kissed you passionately. he pulled back slightly, “am I forgiven?”
you nodded lightly and kissed his cheek, “yup; now go, mister strongest sorcerer.”
“I prefer my lovely husband, but that will do as well.”
he likes to tease you too. it’s in his nature, something he does with everyone he knows. of course, there is some teasing reserved especially for you.
satoru also loves hearing you sing his praises or verbalize your love for him. like that one time you were going on a mission and murmured an ‘I love you’ to his lips, but he quickly stopped you and said, “what did you say, pretty?”
you looked at him confused, “I said I love you,” you poke his cheek, “you heard me.”
he laughed, pulling you close and pressing a kiss to your neck, “I know; I just wanted you to say it again.”
you wanted to roll your eyes, but instead, you cupped his face, pulled him down, and started smothering him with kisses. you pressed a kiss to his cheek, “I love you,” then the other one, “I adore you,” his forehead, “I am infatuated with you,” his eyelids, “I can’t imagine a day without you.”
a big wide grin was plastered on satoru’s face and his cheeks were painted a very faint hue of red. you chuckled at his expression, “was that enough?”
he enveloped you in a big hug, resting his face on yours, “one more time, please?”
for you, you see satoru in a several things in your daily life. you see him in the blue sky above you. you see him in the glass of the bakery you pass by. you see him in the white cat that always walks by your side near the school.
you also hear him in the some of the songs you listen to, and you don’t hesitate to let him know.
one time when you were stargazing on the roofs of the school, playing your playlist since the time before it was satoru’s turn. a specific song started playing and it made you smile, before you spoke up, “y’know, satoru.”
he hums and you continue, “this song reminds me of you.”
you don’t hear a response, so you turn to look at him, “it’s actually one of my favori—satoru? satoru, are you tearing up?!” you laugh, leaning close to him, and he looks away.
“nope!”
behind closed doors, and with great distances separating the both of you, you never fail to call the other to feel their presence even through a phone. it’s practically a ritual for you and satoru to video call whenever one is out on a mission.
you can talk for hours and hours on end or relish in the silence, comforted by the fact that you can see each other.
satoru always insists on them, saying that he sleeps better when he see you. you share the same sentiment, so there’s no surprise that you both always fall asleep on call.
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do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
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ashintheairlikesnow · 1 year ago
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Okay so here, I think, is why I think Red, White and Royal Blue succeeds spectacularly as a romcom, and actually to me is a better-than-average take on the genre.
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First, the leads have absolutely scorching chemistry. They are incredibly believable as two men absolutely infatuated with each other. They each kiss like drowning men shown water, right down to how each grabs at the other, at hair or back or neck and face.
They each have developed their character having a specific characteristic even when flirting or kissing. Henry grabs Alex's hair, for example, every single time, in a way that makes it clear he spends serious time thinking about that hair.
Fair enough, Henry.
They also do something even goddamn better.
They are friends. They are believable as two people who could actually get along long enough to fall in love.
They are allowed to become FRIENDS.
They are given time to get to know each other before they get physical. You can feel their interest in each other growing. And, to my opinion, you can tell that Henry is feeling Alex out through texts to see if the interest might be reciprocated even though he thinks it can't possibly be.
One thing that kills me about romcoms is how the leads will have witty "sexy" banter but don't seem to actually like each other. They are enemies who fall into bed but aren't really believable as lovers.
Henry and Alex are believable, because they... Well. They're impossibly silly even when tearing at each other's clothes. They have awkward moments.
They laugh.
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Alex laughs in bed. He holds Henry in a way that is romantic, openly so. Henry is overcoming the conditioned hesitation and avoidance he has, his smiles and warmth and laughter come with rare vulnerability - Alex is a man who throws himself head first into life and has no such compunctions in the moment. He laughs because this is awesome and Jesus Christ, Prince Henry is too hot to be real.
They like each other, they stumble, they laugh.
But also, another reason this works so well?
The sex scene isn't scorching.
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Watching the sex scene felt realistically intimate. It felt like I had walked in one real people and needed to leave. It was intense in a way that felt like something I maybe wasn't meant to see.
It was filmed so well. So much romanticism and deeply felt adoration in a simple grasping of a hand, the look in soft eyes, a hand pressed against a back. The edge of a knee just in frame. Looking up and looking down.
It felt like we walked into their room during and saw them both laid utterly bare.
Henry's look of vulnerability and nerves and pleasure, Alex looking slowly over his face to take it all in. Moving slowly, then, when everything they do before this is hurried or hidden.
It works as a romcom because you believe 100% these two men could get to like each other, fall in love, and stay that way.
You believe Henry's very real terror of rejection from the public because he already knows his family, beyond his sister, will reject him. You believe that Alex is a headstrong idealist who is sure that you can bulldoze through any wall too tall to climb.
And you believe that between the two of them, they can find a way around the wall entirely.
This movie is a master class on how a movie can get you to suspend so much disbelief if the leads sell their characters. The importance of believable chemistry.
And also... Isn't it nice to see a queer love story in a world that is, in some ways, just a few shades better than our own?
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P.S. you cannot tell me Stephen Fry did not chew the goddamn scenery in circles all around everyone during his single scene. That man was having a ball.
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seospicybin · 6 months ago
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ON THE ROAD.
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PART I
Bangchan, Han & Jeongin x reader. (s,f,a)
Chapters: Part II
Synopsis: A group of friends going on a road trip that, little did they know, will change their lives forever. (19,1k words)
ON THE ROAD PLAYLIST.
Author's note: My inbox is always open for feedback and your wild theories hehehe enjoy this one too! x
A famous author once said that friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too?"
For years, Chan believes that in order to make friends, he has to have common things with them, for example, having the same favorite books having the same hobbies, etcetera.
That's what he thought until he found out that in real life, that's not always the case.
Chan learns all about friendship when he meets his friends. He first met them at the art school 8 years ago and they remain good friends to this very second.
Because they're now living in different places and working in various professions, they have this weekly group video call every Friday at 8 pm.
Chan is so busy editing videos that he almost forgets that it's Friday and it's ten minutes to 8, he hurriedly opens his laptop to start a video call with his friends. He knows it'll take them some time to come online so he notifies his friends through the group chat too, not forgetting to add that he'll not make them watch a foreign movie tonight in the hope that they'll hurry.
That's one thing about Chan, he's passionate about movies and dreams of becoming a great movie director someday. Other than that, Chan has many great qualities about him. He's smart, he's good looking, he lives a healthy lifestyle, and a true social butterfly, something about him that makes people comfortable being around him. Those qualities combined with his dimpled smile create this magnet that attracts a lot of girls.
However, Chan only has eyes on one girl and one girl only.
"Oh, hi, Chris!" A voice that's way too familiar says through the laptop, a voice that evokes something deep within him and sends a tingle down his spine.
"Hi, Jinnie!" Chan says back with a smile.
-
Jinnie's Friday night is like any other night, she's drawing in her studio with the scented candle filling the room with the soft and sweet smell of vanilla. At times, she'll take a break to sip her tea and check her phone for the time.
It's almost 8 and she wonders why the group chat isn't blaring with notifications, she pouts thinking that everyone is too busy to have a video call tonight.
Just like the universe heard her wistful thinking, her phone chimes with a notification and her face lights up as she opens it.
It's Chan sending a link to the video call. Jinnie wastes no time to get on her laptop and clicks on the link that takes her to where everyone is going to virtually meet. A few seconds later, her face appears on the box on the screen next to Chan and that means she's the first to come online after him which is not a surprise.
"Oh!" She delightfully gasps, feeling happy to see a friendly face even though they had one of the video calls a week ago.
"Hi, Chris!" She greets him while smiling and enthusiastically waving her hand through the screen.
"Hi, Jinnie!" Chan replies with his sweet, dimpled smile.
It's kind of adorable to find him waving with his muscular arms and Jinnie can't help but smile. She adjusts her desk lamp to give her proper lighting then stacks her hands together.
"It's always us, huh?"
"What?" Chan asks as he leans closer to the screen.
"It's always you and me," Jinnie says, pointing at him and then at herself while half laughing.
Chan cracks a laugh at that, "And that means Jeongin will come next."
"Cause we all know who will come last."
"You mean who will come late?" Chan corrects him with a smirk.
Jinnie lowly chuckles and grabs her cup of tea from the other desk, "How are you, Chris?"
"I'm doing great, I guess," he answers.
"I guess?" Jinnie squinted her eyes at him as she repeated his words, "You've been staying up all night again, did you?"
"Well, uh..." Chan tries to make up an excuse but fails, he covers his eyes in embarrassment and laughs it off, "I tried not to."
"Are you working on something?"
"Yeah, I'm editing these videos for a short film I did with a friend," he answers.
"Oh? Is it the same one as the one you told me?"
"No. It's a different one."
"I know you're working, I hope you keep taking care of yourself well, Chris," Jinnie warmly tells him, genuinely concerned as a friend.
Jinnie has always been like that, kind, attentive, and a great illustrator, she's as gentle as the colors she uses in her art. She's beautiful but not solely because she's the only girl in this group of friends.
Jinnie's outer appearance matches her inside and you rarely find that kind of person.
The other often think of Jinnie as an angel that unluckily fell on this part of the earth, right in the middle of this friendship, and has become a blessing to everyone ever since.
"Oh, there's Jeongin!" She gasps, showing the same enthusiastic and bright smile whenever she sees her friends.
In other words, there's lucky to have Jinnie as their friend.
-
The letter feels heavy on his hand even though it's only a piece of paper, a piece of paper that holds his future and will forever change his life.
Jeongin should be happy, this is what he wants but something is tugging at his chest. He slips the paper back into its envelope and hides it in between pages of the book he's reading.
He reclines on his chair and runs his hands through his hair, feeling torn but he doesn't know what makes him feel that way. He closes his eyes as if it would help him shutting his mind off and ignoring the chimes that come from his phone until he remembers to check it.
Using his hand, he gropes around the table to find his phone without looking and unlocks it to find some notifications, the first three are coming from Chan.
Jeongin rushes on his chair realizing that it's Friday and he forgot about the video call. He immediately gets on his computer and logs into the link Chan sent him through the group chat.
Despite knowing that he's late, he remains calm because he knows he'll not be the last to join, there's someone else who will come later than him.
The screen takes a moment to load the video call and he appears on the lower box between his two friends, Jinnie and Chan.
"Oh, there's Jeongin!" Jinnie exclaims in joy, as beautiful and bright as usual like she's bringing her own sun wherever she goes.
"Well, Chan said we're not going to watch a weird foreign movie so here I am," Jeongin jokingly says.
"Thank you, Jeongin," Chan says, poking his cheek with his tongue, easily offended as expected which truly shows he's the oldest one in this group of friends.
"But the last one we watched was really good," Jinnie says, defending Chan with his exquisite taste in movies.
So here's the thing, everyone knows that Jinnie and Chan would make a perfect couple but it's a mystery why they're not dating yet.
Jeongin knows for sure that Chan has a feeling for Jinnie and it's so obvious, but he can't say the same about Jinnie even though it's impossible that she missed all of those signs.
Or maybe love is a simple thing because Jeongin is someone who watches from the outside and it's different for those two individuals involved. But still, Chan has been there all along and Jinnie doesn't see it, which infuriates Jeongin at times.
Whenever he sees them together, he gets the urge to point out everything but instead of that, he lets out a sigh and then puts on a smile.
"So, how are you guys?" He asks.
Jeongin has always been the quiet one, but don't take his silence as ignorance, he's very observant. He watches everything and remembers everything to the tiniest details, that's also why the others become extremely careful with what they say or do around Jeongin because they know he has their cards under his sleeves.
But being observant also means he has sound judgments about things, he's fair and sensible and that makes Jeongin the most reasonable one.
"I'm great. I'm having a cup of tea with me," Jinnie says, showing the cup of tea she's holding with both hands with her eyes forming two crescents as she smiles.
"And I'm good, thank you for asking," Chan says with his dimpled smile.
"I'm not asking you, Chris," Jeongin jokes.
Chan presses his lips together until they form a thin line and lets out air through his nostrils with his eyes closed while Jinnie is giggling.
"How was the recital going?" Jinnie asks.
"It went well," Jeongin answers.
Honestly, everything went so well, he's still playing piano as always and has shows to do but something about it makes him feel a little distressed that he feels the need to shift the talk.
"Well, we're not watching Chris' weird movie tonight—"
"It's not weird," Chan groans in disagreement and a glare aimed at him.
Jeongin refuses to correct his earlier remark and continues, "So what we're going to do tonight?"
Truthfully, Jeongin really needs the distraction tonight and he doesn't mind at all even if it means he has to endure three hours of watching a movie he can't understand, plot or language-wise.
"I have an announcement," Chan says.
"What kind of announcement?" Jinnie curiously asks with her eyes comically widening.
Chan swivels his chair to the side and plays with a stress ball in his hand, "I can't say anything yet until everyone gets here," he says.
Jeongin groans as he reclines on his chair and covers his face, knowing that it'll take only God knows how long until the last person finally comes online.
"In that case, I'll get myself a can of soda first," he says to everyone, then gets up from the chair.
When he returns to his room, Jeongin notices that the fourth person has joined the video call. Actually, he can hear it even before he enters the room from his babble.
"I know you guys have been waiting for me. No need to get that excited!" Han says, acting like he didn't just make everyone wait for him as usual.
-
Han is trapped in his own head like usual, arranging words in his head to make good lyrics for the track he made last night. He pictures those words in his head as he hums the melody to himself and then jots them down in his notebook.
He puts the headphones on again to hear the track once more, singing the lyrics to fit the melodies and only realizing that his mom is calling for him once she appears in front of him.
Disoriented, Han sits up on the bed and puts his headphones down, "What's wrong?"
"I've been calling you for dinner!" His mother scolds him.
He lets out a chuckle and takes his headphones off altogether, "But it's only five," he says.
His mother must have been so used to seeing him in his room and unaware of the time.
"I put the dinner in the oven," she informs with a dramatic head shake before exiting his room.
Is it dinner time already? He looks around for his phone on the bed, he's sure it's somewhere in there. He's flinging the duvet and then there's the sound of his phone falling onto the floor.
"Owh?!" He gasps, covering his small mouth with his hand.
Han rushes to the other side of the bedroom and picks it up, fortunately, his phone doesn't crack or break, but the time...
"Oh??!" He gasps again in a rather panicky tone.
It's almost 9, he's late for the video call again. He rushes to his laptop and it won't turn on because it runs out of battery.
"Ugh!" He groans as he struggles to plug it in the first time and groans again as he plops onto his chair.
It's always like this, losing track of time when he starts working on something. He remembers it was only four when he started writing his lyrics and now it's almost 9 pm.
It's like the laptop knows he's in a hurry it decides to take more time to boot and Han nervously taps his fingers against the desk, knowing that he makes his friends wait for him for the umpteenth time.
His fingers are typing as fast as they can to log in to his account but it takes him another moment to load the video call.
"Work faster you piece of a—"
"Welp. There he is!" Chan exclaims, looking annoyed but relieved at the same time.
"Thank you for finally gracing us with your presence," Jeongin says with the right amount of sarcasm in his tone.
"Oh, hi, Han!" Jinnie says, being the most welcoming out of the three.
"I know you guys have been waiting for me. No need to be that excited!" Han playfully says. He knows they're upset and tries to lighten the mood.
In his defense, he didn't do it on purpose. It becomes a habit at this point and he knows everyone will eventually let it slide.
"I guess you've been busy working on your lyrics again, huh?" Jinnie asks, propping her hand under her chin.
"No, I was helping my mom fold the laundry," Han makes a joke out of his own life.
Unlike everyone else, Han is the only one who hasn't figured out yet what to do with his talent for producing music. He's been working on some tracks but that's about it.
"Anyway, what kind of weird movie are we going to watch tonight?" He asks, shifting the talk to something else.
Chan clicks his tongue and says, "Thank you for making it obvious that you didn't read the group chat."
"Well, I opened them but didn't read them like all cool people do," Han confidently says with a sly grin plastered on his face.
Despite the uncertainty of his career, Han thinks he's the coolest of them all and doesn't care if anyone thinks otherwise. He's funny, and he's the mood-maker of the group but in all honesty, he's just being his authentic self 24/7.
"Okay, now since we're all here..." Chan says, sitting upright in his seat.
"Oh, so we're not watching a movie tonight," Han says in utter confusion, this is why he shouldn't be late so he won't miss out on a lot of things.
"Just shh..." Jeongin hushes him with a finger in front of his jutted lips.
"You're not like... dying, right?" Han hesitantly asks because Chan puts on a serious face, "It's cause you look so pale..."
"I've always been pale. What are you talking about?" Chan grumbles in disbelief, not accepting the fact that his pale skin makes him look like he's dying to him.
"Hannie!" Jinnie sharply calls his name, that is her way of sparing herself from using profanities
"I told you to just shh..." Jeongin scolds him more.
"Okay, okay, I'll shut up," Han says with both hands raised in defeat.
"Anyway," Chan reels the conversation back to the main thing and claps his hands together to get everyone's attention, "I need you guys to get days off for a week at the beginning of next month."
"But why?" Jeongin asks.
"Jinnie, Jeongin, I give you guys a month of forewarning so there's no reason you can't do it," Chan explains, not taking any excuses.
"And you're not concerned about me?" Han asks, feeling left out.
"That's because I know you're always available," Chan shortly answers.
"I need to ask permission from my mom!"
"To do what?" Chan squints his eyes at him.
"Permission to go on a road trip with you guys," he innocently answers.
"You're not some 12-year-old going on a school field trip," Jeongin reminds him that he won't be needing that.
"Oh, yeah, okay," Han meekly says with a nonchalant shrug.
"Well, that means I only need to finish some of my drawings early," Jinnie calmly says.
Chan smiles at her through the camera, "I know you can do it," he sweetly says.
"Thank you, Chris," Jinnie says with a smile.
"Wait, wait, you haven't answered my question," Jeongin interrupts the tender moment between the two, "Why?"
Chan sucks air through his teeth and stretches his arms out, not sure if he's trying to show off his muscular arms or just wanted to stretch them out.
"Because we're going on a road trip!" He announces in a cheery tone.
Jinnie grins in reaction and then claps her hands in excitement, "That sounds fun!"
"Where are we going?" Jeongin further asks.
"I don't want to spoil it yet. It's a surprise," Chan replies.
"I doubt that it'll be a good surprise," Han says just to annoy Chan.
"Just trust me on this!" Chan remarks with a confident smile.
"I just can't wait to spend time with you guys," Jinnie warmly says, being not shy to show her excitement which makes Chan get a little flustered.
"For the rest of this month we'll stop the weekly video meeting," Chan comes with a shocking announcement.
It's the only way they can hang out with each other and knowing that they won't meet until further notice kind of bummed him out.
"Why? Why? Why?" Han repeatedly asks like a parrot.
"So you guys can sort things out," Chan explains, "and Jinnie needs time to finish the drawings, right?"
"Yeah, but..." Jinnie looks a little taken aback too, "I'm sad that we'll not be hanging out for weeks."
"But we'll meet again," Chan assures her.
He clasps his hands in front of him and goes into serious mode once more, "I need you guys to gather at Jinnie's on the first day of July and I'll pick you up there," he informs.
Jinnie nods
"What should we pack?" Jinnie asks, even getting her notes ready to write them down.
"Pack clothes for a week, swimsuits, sunblock, hiking shoes..." Chan lists various things.
"Hiking shoes?" Han gasps, "I'm not going then."
"Even better," Jeongin lightly comments.
"Any more questions?" Chan asks everyone.
Han raises his hand even though he's not in a class, "How's your little sister doing?"
This is where Chan gets a little more serious, he hisses and then says, "I'm not taking any more questions then."
"Why are you so against us dating?" Han pokes fun at him, knowing that he doesn't like it, especially when he asks about his sister.
"Wouldn't it be nice if we become in-laws? We can be brothers for real!" Han annoys him more.
"I'm going to say this once and for all, I don't want to become in-laws with any of you," Chan firmly remarks and then crosses his big arms together.
"So that means you're okay with us dating..." Han relentlessly annoys him with a smirk dance on his face.
Jeongin drops his head into his hands and shakes his head witnessing the interaction while Jinnie is quietly giggling with her cup of tea in hand.
"How am I going to survive not seeing you guys for weeks?" Jinnie sadly says with a pout.
"Not me. I'll manage," Jeongin coyly says, reclining on his seat while playing with his hair.
"We'll see each other soon," Han assures her this time.
Jinnie smiles and cups her cheeks with both hands, "I can't wait to see you all," she says.
There's a moment of silence but the comfortable kind and not conjure any questions, everyone lets it go on for another moment before it gets to the time to end the video meeting.
"See you guys soon," Jinnie says, blowing air kisses through the camera.
"See you guys. Don't miss me," Han says with a sly grin on his face.
"There's no being late," Chan warns a specific someone.
"Jeongin, don't be late!" Han averts the blame to Jeongin.
Jeongin shakes his head again and raises his hand at everyone, "Bye, everyone!"
"See you guys in a few weeks," Chan says, waving his hands close to the camera then ends the video meeting.
-
A FEW WEEKS LATER
When you asked Chan if you could tag along on their road trip, he said no for what you guessed these two reasons: one, he hates seeing you around the boys and two, he hates for you to see him act around the girl he likes.
But, of course, in the end, he said yes for one solid reason: because you're his sister and he can't say no to you.
It's so obvious that Chan is nervous and you guess it's because he's going to meet the friends he hasn't met in weeks and more importantly, a certain someone that he secretly misses but can't tell.
As Chan's little sister, you notice these kinds of things, the change of attitude or how he gets nervous all of a sudden.
"Unclench your jaws, Chris," you remind him.
"I'm not—" he stops himself from talking and does as you told him, unclenching his jaws.
He may have unclenched his jaws but now his shoulders tense up. You take matters into your own hands and push his shoulder down.
"You're way too nervous to see a friend," you poke fun at him.
"Shut up!" He spews out and you know it's coming out of his nervous system.
Everyone knows that Chan likes Jinnie and he's always been for only God knows how long, you guess you're not the only one annoyed by the fact that they're not dating yet because they're just so perfect for each other.
"Okay, shutting up now," you say, making a gesture of zipping your lips together to not let the scary mad Chan come out.
The car makes a turn toward an apartment building and Chan parked it next to the entrance. It seems like Jinnie has been waiting for his arrival, she comes rushing down the stairs from the second floor where her apartment is.
"Oh, my God! Chris!!!" She excitedly comes up to him with open arms
Chan is obviously as excited to see her and catches her right into his arms, he even lifts her off the ground for a moment and gives her a spin.
They're so stinking cute that you can't help but smile watching them through the rearview mirror.
"Good to see you!" She says once he puts her down.
"Good to see you too," Chan says back while holding her hands in his.
When you deem that it's the right moment to insert yourself into the scene, you get out of the car and slowly make an entrance.
They're so immersed in each other that you hesitate to burst their cute little bubble.
"Hi!" You awkwardly wave your hand at her.
Jinnie's face lights up when she sees you, "Oh, hi! Long time no see!"
You come up to her to exchange a hug with her, "Long time no see, indeed."
The fact that she, possibly, would become your sister-in-law doesn't bother you at all, Jinnie is as perfect as one can be. She's beautiful and kind, the nicest human you've ever known, you couldn't be happier if that becomes true.
"I hope you don't mind that I brought her along," Chan says, flashing a thin smile at you.
You shoot him a side eye in return and stay by Jinnie's side.
"Are you kidding? I'm happy that I have a girl companion," she says, pulling you close to her side and squeezing on your shoulder.
"Jinnie, do you mind if I use your bathroom?" You ask, getting the urge to pee all of a sudden.
"Not at all. I'll take you—"
"That's okay. I know where to go," you kindly refuse her help to show you where her bathroom is.
That way, you can give them another moment to catch up with each other. As you climb the stairs to Jinnie's apartment, you see how Chan is grinning from ear to ear and it seems like it will stay like that until the road trip ends. Maybe that's also another reason why he agreed to let you join the road trip, Chan needs a good wingman by his side.
-
The moment he got out of the taxi, Han immediately thanked Jeongin non-stop.
"Thank you Yang Jeongin," he says, calling Jeongin by his full name.
"If you didn't pick me up, I'd be dead late," he grumbles, lowering his voice as he's a bit ashamed to admit it.
"I just knew you'd be late," Jeongin says while hoisting the strap of his backpack higher on his shoulder.
Han hurriedly puts on a smile to greet his friends, acting like he almost got here late for the road trip. He sees his two friends, Chan and Jinnie putting their stuff in the back of the car.
"Rejoice everyone. Your favorite boy is here!" Han announces his arrival while walking in big, confident strides.
Chan and Jeongin just leer at him and Jinnie is the only one giving him a proper welcome.
"It's so nice that everyone's here!" She exclaims, smiling even brighter than the scintillating sun.
She gathers everyone into a circle and puts her arms around Han and Chan's shoulders.
"I missed you guys," Jinnie says, jumping on her feet like a child. She really is the special glue that sticks them all together.
Deep down, everyone feels the same way, Han must say it feels good to reunite with them, it evokes the same feeling of coming home. They're huddling together for a big group hug, relishing that longing for each other.
Han breaks away first to take the last empty spot on the trunk for his backpack, "Dibs!"
Chan and Jeongin groan in unison but at the same time, not surprised to see this display of childish behavior from Han. Chan continues organizing everyone's stuff in the trunk with Jeongin's help while Han comes around the car.
"I'm riding shotgun!" Han shouts, calling dibs for the passenger's seat.
Jinnie appears from behind the car, "I think Chan's sister will ride shotgun," she informs.
Han thinks he misheard her, he lingers by the car door and turns to ask her, "Who?"
"Chan's sister, she's coming with us for the— oh, there she is!" Jinnie points at the stairs.
Han's eyes are following where she's pointing and turns his head that way.
"Oh, everyone's here!" You say as you look at everyone from the top of the stairs.
Time suddenly goes so slowly as you descend the stairs, softly smiling as the gust of wind blows your way, sending your hair flying, and with the sun shining down at you, it creates a halo around your head.
Jeongin accidentally bumps him as he opens the car door, "sorry," he shortly says.
Han is completely gobsmacked to care, his eyes just can't stop following you even after you arrive at the base of the stairs and walk up to the car.
"I think it's true," Han foolishly says with a gaping mouth.
"Huh? What?" Jeongin asks in confusion.
"When the love is real... it finds a way," Han dramatically sighs with eyes big and wide like seeing something so wondrous.
Jeongin gives him the side eyes, but he decides to ignore him and gets into the car.
"I'm going to lock my apartment first," Jinnie informs, going up the stairs to her apartment.
"Hi, Han," you greet him.
Han tries not to crumble hearing you calling his name and instead of answering, he awkwardly raises his hand at you with a stupid grin on his face.
"Are you sitting in the front?" You ask.
Han's brain is not well functioning yet and it takes more time for him to compute a word.
"Well, then I'm going to take my bag," you say, stepping forward and getting in between him and the car door to take your bag from the passenger's seat.
The smell of your perfume is sweet and soft yet it's enough to get him intoxicated, he wants more of it. He suddenly has no desire to ride a shotgun and arranges a new plan in his head.
He rushes to the back of the car and yanks at Jeongin's jacket, "Jeongin, get in the backseat!"
"What?" He asks in utter confusion.
"Get in the backseat! Hurry!" He urges him, opening the seat to the back so he can move.
Doesn't want to deal with him, Jeongin reluctantly moves to the back as requested and Han sets the seat right back up, then keeps the car door open for you.
"Get in," Han says to you.
"Oh, thank you," you mutter, carrying your bag in one hand as you get in.
Noticing Jeongin in the backseat, you smile and greet him, "Hi!"
"Hi," Jeongin sheepishly says to you.
Han sees that Jinnie has returned from locking her apartment and hurriedly opens the car door for her, "You can sit in the front, Jinnie."
Jinnie looks at him, perplexed, "I thought you are..."
He can't hear the rest of what she's saying as he gets into the car and sits next to you.
"I hope it's okay that I tag along for the road trip," you say, putting your bag on your lap.
Han realizes that he should get his act together and forces his brain to function, "It's more than okay," he says with a smile.
This road trip turns into a chance of a lifetime for him. What could be more fun than being stuck in a moving vehicle with a girl he likes?
Chan gets into the driver's side, sighing as he's exhausted from arranging the trunk, and puts the keys into the ignition.
Oh, fuck, Han forget about the part that her brother is in the mentioned moving vehicle too, and drives it. Now, his sense of protection is heightened after seeing you sitting next to him.
"What's with this seat arrangement?" He asks, glaring at Han through the rearview mirror.
He innocently shrugs while Jeongin is staying quiet in the backseat by himself, enjoying the spacious seat for himself.
Jinnie is the last to enter the car and lets out a delighted sigh once she buckles her seat belt. She then looks around at the people in the back and asks, "Everyone is ready to go?"
In response to her question, Jeongin raises a thumbs-up while Han is weakly cheering with his fists in the air and you're laughing at him.
Jinnie then turns her head at Chan and says, "Let's go!"
And just like that, the road trip begins.
-
Everyone else thinks that Han's liking toward you is just a joke and he does that as a way to annoy Chan. Unfortunately, it's not.
He admits that at first, he didn't think of you that way. The very first time he received the information that Chan has a sister, he thinks of you not more than that, a younger sister of his friend.
That night Chan invited everyone to the bar to celebrate his birthday and you've recently turned 21 that year which is why your brother finally took you along with him to hang out with his friends for the first time and he believes that was when things take a different turn.
Han met you once, briefly at Chan's graduation and you've just entered college at that time. When he met you again that night, he almost couldn't recognize you because you've grown so much.
You were just a young girl when he met you for the first time and that night, he saw that girl had flourished into a grown woman and attracted him immediately.
He was so deeply mesmerized by you that he just stared at you the whole night that Jeongin had to constantly snap him out of his head.
The one moment that got him enamored is when you decided to take your jacket off that night and revealed the white camisole you wore that night, he could tell you were wearing nothing underneath because your nipples were poking through the silky fabric. He remembers watching you enjoy the night and dancing your heart out with Jinnie the whole night.
Han couldn't get you out of his head ever since, he grew some sort of infatuation with you, and he followed you on your social media.
When he feels bold enough, he slides into your DMs and asks how you're doing. Chan doesn't know and the fact that he's still oblivious about it means that you don't mention it to him and that's good, it spares him from his doom coming sooner than everyone else's.
Now that he gets to see you in person, sitting side by side when all he could do was just admire you through the pictures you posted. It feels a little surreal that he has to pinch himself a few times to convince him that you're real.
Since Chan is busy talking with Jinnie in the front, he takes it as an opportunity to talk with you because he's wasted three hours secretly staring at you.
"So, how are you doing?" He awkwardly asks while still getting used to sitting next to you.
"I'm doing great," you shortly answer, placing your hand on the space between you and him.
"I heard you're working at the magazine now?" He asks, making it sounds like he heard it from Chan but he actually knew it from your Instagram post.
"Yes, I am," you answer with a sheepish smile.
"I think that's great!" He praises and tries to keep his excitement in check.
"I'm just a copy editor for now. I don't think it's that great," you sheepishly say.
"No, I think that's great," Han feels the need to convince you so he seeks validation from a third party, "Right, Jeongin?"
Jeongin scratches his chin and stifles a nod, "Yeah. That's great!"
"Thank you," you mutter with a shy smile and tuck your hair behind your ear, "How about you? How are you doing?
"Good," he shortly answers but he knows you need more from his answer, "I've been working on a few tracks."
When it comes to you, Han doesn't feel like the coolest person but the objective remains the same, he wants to impress you.
"And I worked on that thing," he scratches his head while considering whether it's right to share it with you.
You tuck your hair behind your ear and look at him, "Worked on what?"
"I made this jingle for an ad," he hesitantly shares.
You shift your body toward him and ask further, "Do I know this ad or...?"
Seeing that you're genuinely curious about it, Han gains a little confidence to share more.
"It's for a shaving cream commercial and it goes like this..." Han starts humming the melody and serenading it to you.
"Didn't you do that thing last year though?" Jeongin interrupts his serenading with a truth bomb.
Han looks over his shoulder and glares at him, making Jeongin see his displeased expression that he's not a great wingman at the moment.
"Yeah, but..." he turns his body more to look at him but can't find something to defend himself.
"I did that," he continues as his confidence deflates in each passing second, "nonetheless."
"Everyone," Jinnie says from the front, "We're going to stop for gas."
Even Jinnie makes a better wingman than Jeongin and she's clueless about what happened in the back earlier.
"Oh, great timing! I need to go to the bathroom," you exclaim, gathering your hair to put it into a ponytail.
This is not a good start, he can tell that you're not impressed at all and far from attracted to him. He consoles himself with snacks, eating them right outside the convenience store.
"I blew that up," he sighs, then shoves chips into his mouth.
"That's because," Jeongin says, then pausing to take another sip of his soda, "you keep staring at her like a creep."
Han elbows his side quite hard that Jeongin yelps, "and you didn't help at all," he grumbles with his cheeks full of food.
"You're hopeless," Jeongin easily replies and steals some chips from Han.
"And you didn't think that's why I need the help?" Han grumbles again and shoves more chips into his mouth.
Jeongin coyly shrugs as he drains his can of soda empty then proceeds to crumple it and toss it into the trash bin.
"Hey, what are you guys having?" You appear from the corner along with Jinnie.
"Where's Chris?" Jinnie asks while fixing her hair.
"He's inside," Jeongin points to the convenience store.
Han quickly swallows everything in his mouth and brushes the crumbs on the front of his shirt, "Do you want some?" He offers you his bag of chips.
"Do you have something sweet with you?" You ask.
"I do, I do," he eagerly answers, rummaging through the bag of snacks he bought and pulling out a pack of strawberry jellies, "I think you'll like this."
"Oh, no, I'm allergic to strawberries," you inform.
Han quickly pulls out another pack of snacks from the plastic bag, "How about this?"
You take it from him and delightfully gasp, "Oh, I love these."
Chan comes out with Jinnie carrying packs of drinks for everyone and without warning, he tosses the car keys at Jeongin, fortunately, he has a good reflex and catches it right into his hand.
"Your turn to drive," Chan says to Jeongin.
Jeongin doesn't say anything else but walks up to the car with everyone following him from the back.
Han opens the car door for you when Chan grabs your hand and stops you on the track, "You ride shotgun."
"Yes, sir!" You also obey without complaint.
"And you," Chan points at Han, "Get on the backseat!"
Han frowns that Chan purposely separates the two of you and reluctantly goes to sit by himself in the back while Chan and Jinnie sit in the middle.
From the back of the car, Han can only watch you share the pack of chocolate maltesers with Jeongin in the front.
-
After four hours of driving, the car stops for dinner and everyone gets so quiet once the food arrives.
Chan makes sure everyone has finished so he can have all of their attention as he explains what the next plan is. Before you can ask for his dessert, he slides his plate towards you.
"Can I have everyone's attention?" He says.
Jeongin is mindlessly stirring his glass of soda with the straw but putting his attention on him meanwhile Han is slowly dissociating so Chan snaps his fingers right in front of his face to reel him back to reality.
Han swats his hand away and groans, "I'm listening, I'm listening."
"Okay, so, we're not going to continue to drive," Chan announces.
"Oh? We're sleeping somewhere for the night?" Jinnie asks, then dabs her mouth with a napkin, "And I need you guys to sleep early tonight because—"
"Because of what?" Han asks as he lazily brushes his hair to the back.
Chan sighs because Han cuts him off instead of letting him continue talking, "Because we have to leave early tomorrow morning."
"And where are we going?" You ask, sliding the plate back to him. Chan glares at you for leaving a small piece of dessert for him and you grin at him in return.
"Let me guess, surprise?" Han says with a mocking grin.
Chan scoops the last piece of cake into his mouth and ignoring Han's insinuation, he has a way to get back to him.
"Who voted for Han to pay the bill?" He says with his hand already raised in the air and Jeongin is the next one to raise his hand.
"W-what? Why? Why me?" Han blabbers in a slight panic.
Everyone turns their heads at Jinnie and since two of his friends already voted for him, she follows the majority and hesitantly raises her hand.
"Sorry," she meekly mutters at Han.
When it comes to you, you hurriedly shake your head and refuse to be a part of their shenanigans. Chan intensely glares at you, pressuring you to also raise your hand.
"Please, leave me out of this," you plead.
Having no other way to make you do what he tells you to do, Chan grabs your hand and raises it in the air. He then triumphantly grins at Han until his dimples sunken into his cheeks.
"Everyone says 'Thank you, Han'!" He orders.
"Thank you, Han!" Everyone says in unison while Han is slumped on his seat, suddenly not looking drowsy anymore.
With the information gained from the restaurant staff, Chan easily found the motel a ten-minute drive away. Arrive there, he immediately goes to check in while everyone is getting their belonging from the trunk.
Without saying anything, Jeongin hands you a bag and you look at it for a moment until you realize that it's yours.
"Oh, thank you," you mutter.
You also take Chan's bag, it's so heavy and you bet he's taking his laptop and camera with him which only reminds you to be careful with it. Once he gets back with the room keys, you hurriedly hand him his bag.
"This one is for the ladies," Chan hands one of the keys to Jinnie.
"Got it," Jinnie says, linking her arm with you to start walking to your room.
Everyone is heading the same way since the boys are staying in the next room. You can't wait to lie down after spending more than ten hours sitting in the car.
"It seems like we're sharing the bed," Jinnie says, seeing there's only one bed in the room.
"Don't worry, I don't snore like my brother," you immediately remark as you throw yourself onto the bed and sigh in delight.
Jinnie laughs as she unpacks her bag, "Wait... Chris snores?"
You roll to the side and prop a hand under your head, "I thought you knew," you say.
"I've seen Chris sleeping but he didn't snore," Jinnie shares, taking clean clothes out of her bag.
"Of course," you talk to yourself, Chan wouldn't let his crush know about his sleeping habit especially something as bad as snoring.
"What's that?" Jinnie asks, hearing you mutter to yourself.
"I just remember I need to charge my phone," you lie, rolling over to the other side to rummage through your bag.
"Do you mind if I use the bathroom first?" Jinnie politely asks, holding her clothes close to her chest.
"Sure," you answer with your hand still groping around to look for your phone charger. Getting hopeless, you call for Jinnie as she's about to enter the bathroom.
"Hey, Jinnie, can I borrow your charger?"
She stops on her track and then puts her clothes on top of the dresser, "Sure," she says, going back to her bag to get it and give it to you.
"I think I dropped my phone in the car," she mutters as she looks through her bag.
"Oh, no," you mumble but an idea comes to mind.
"I can call Chris to help you find it," you offer, turning her misfortune into an opportunity to set them up.
"No, it's okay. It's probably under the seat of the car," she says but she looks worried.
"Are you even sure that you dropped it in the car?" You ask, making her doubt herself.
Jinnie looks concerned now that she clasps her hands together in front of her, "I don't want—"
Before she gets to finish her sentence, you hit call on Chan's number and he picks up on the third ring.
"What's up, baby sist?" He slurs his words, he's just as tired as everyone.
Without greeting him first, you talk straight into the phone, "Jinnie dropped her phone in the car. Can you help her find it?"
You hear rustles from the other end of the call and his tone changes all of a sudden, "Just need to get my car keys and I'll be on your door in a minute."
There's no need to plead or beg, you only need to mention Jinnie's name and he's ready to do anything, he'd probably move mountains for her too if she asked for it.
You hold the urge to laugh and calmly look at Jinnie, "He'll be here soon," you tell her.
"Oh, thank you," Jinnie says, canceling her plan to wash up and putting her sweater back on.
A few minutes later, the knocking comes on the door and Jinnie goes to open it. You peek from the side to watch the interaction.
"Heard you dropped your phone in the car," Chan says to her.
"Yeah, I hope I didn't disturb you," Jinnie says.
"Not at all," he immediately says.
Jinnie looks at you and you pretend to be busy looking at your phone, "Hey, I'm going out for a bit."
"Yeah, sure, take your time," you say with a smile then realize that you're not using the right tone.
"Hope you find your phone," you quickly add.
Jinnie is trailing behind Chan as they walk back to the parking lot and he hurriedly unlocks the car at the first sight of it.
"I'm sure it's somewhere in the middle seat," Jinnie says, opening the car door and going straight to feel the gap between the seats.
"I'll look from the other side," Chan says.
He walks around the car and looks from the other side, he turns on the flashlight from his phone and shines it under the seat. All he finds are candy wrappers and he knows who the culprit is.
"Let's get these seats up," he suggests, turning the lever to fold the seats and making it easier to search for the phone.
As they're busy looking for the phone, their heads meet in the middle, and bumps against each other. Chan reflexively reaches for Jinnie's head and rubs on it.
"I'm sorry," he says while giggling, "Are you okay?"
Jinnie can't answer as she's busy laughing and after taking a breath, she nods, "I'm okay."
"You know, it'll be much easier to call you," he says, coming up with a faster way to find the phone a little too late.
"Why didn't I think of that earlier?" Jinnie says, feeling embarrassed as she holds her hair from curtaining her face.
Chan looks for her number and presses the call buttons, he waits for the dialing tone while Jinnie looks around in the dark.
"Oh, I heard it!" She gasps.
The muffled ringtone comes from the back and Chan flips the seat to the front, discovering Jinnie's phone caught between the seats. With his long arm, Chan outstretches his arm to get it and hurriedly hands it to her.
"Thank God!" She sighs in relief and takes the phone from him.
Chan closes the car door and quickly locks it again, he checks by pulling at the car handle to know if it's locked for good.
"I was so scared that I dropped it somewhere else," Jinnie shares, clutching her phone close to her chest.
"I'm glad you found it," Chan says, smiling because he feels good knowing that he makes Jinnie happy.
"Thank you for helping, Chris," Jinnie sincerely says with a smile that is as soft as the moonlight.
Chan would do anything to see that smile on Jinnie's face again, he then looks away before it gets too intense.
"Don't mention it," he coyly says.
As they walk back to the rooms, their hands lightly grazing each other's, and on a nice, summer night like this, Chan feels tempted to hold her hand.
He looks down and her hand is right there, a grasp away from him. All he needs to do—
Jinnie draws her hands and crosses them together in front of her, "I'm so curious where you'll take us tomorrow," she says.
Chan clears his throat and shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.
"Trust me, you guys will like it," he confidently says, "especially you."
Jinnie looks at him with a bewildered expression, "Me?"
"Yeah," he nods and grins.
"That only makes me more excited for tomorrow," she says, hugging herself tighter as a gust of wind blows their way.
Jinnie stops right in front of your shared room, she looks at Chan who's standing on the door to his room, "Thanks once again, Chris."
"It's not a big deal," he says with a smile.
Jinnie knocks on the door and a while later, you open the door with your head wrapped in a towel, "Did you find it?"
"Yeah," she answers, showing you the phone in her hand.
"That's a relief!" You exclaim, then step to the side to let her in.
Jinnie looks at Chan for one last time and smiles, "Goodnight, Chris."
"Goodnight," he says back, and once Jinnie gets inside, his foolish smile drops from his face knowing that you're watching him.
"Get back inside. Lock the door and sleep!" He strictly orders.
"Yes, sir," you reply along with a salute.
You grab the handle of the door and take one more chance to poke fun at him.
"Goodnight, Chris," You try your best to copy Jinnie's soft tone of saying it and quickly close the door before Chan gets the chance to scold you.
-
When Chan said they needed to leave early the next day, Han didn't think it would require him to wake up at 6 in the morning.
He doesn't know how Chan did that because he was the last one to sleep but he also woke up the earliest and even brought breakfast with him when he came to the room.
"Your turn to drive today," Chan says, throwing the car keys and clanging against the floor as Han fails to catch them.
"Ugh..." he lets out an exhausted groan and picks them up from the floor.
Concerned with his state, Chan grabs his shoulder and squeezes, "You sure you can drive?"
Han knows that if he says no, then Chan will take the task from him and he doesn't want that, Chan already did so much. He's sure he's more tired than everyone.
"Yeah, I can drive," he assures him with a not-so-convincing smile.
The doubts linger in Chan's eyes, he gives him a pat on the back and then says, "You know what? I'll get you another cup of coffee!"
The sun is peeking from the horizon and slowly climbs its way out, the sunray hits his eyes as Han arrives at the parking lot.
He unlocks the car from a meter away and puts his bag in the trunk first before walking to the driver's side.
"Ugh..." he groans again with one hand on the handle of the car door.
The last person who drove was Jeongin and thanks to his long limbs, Han has to readjust the seat because his arms aren't long enough for the steering wheel.
He's yawning as he takes his phone out and connects it to the car stereo, at least, being a driver means he has full control over the music.
"Morning," Jinnie cheerily says, with a smile that shines brighter than the morning sun.
Something about her smile that makes him can't help but smile back.
"Morning," he says back, "Do you need help with the bag?"
"It's okay. I'll do it myself," She says, heading to the back of the car.
Not long after, Chan comes carrying bags on each shoulder but looking unbothered by them, he ends up helping Jinnie with her bag. Jeongin comes next, handing his bag to Chan before getting into the car and sitting in the back.
Han is busy scrolling his phone to compile a playlist for the trip to realize that everyone is already getting in except for one person.
He looks to the back and sees Chan sitting in the middle with Jinnie so that means...
"I have your coffee with me," you say, climbing into the passenger's side.
He turns his head to the back to check if Chan approves of this seating arrangement but he's already snuggled up in his hoodie to sleep.
"Americano, right?" You ask, handing the cup of coffee to him.
"Oh?" Han looks at you and then at the coffee.
The second he realizes that you're waiting for him, he hurriedly gets it from you, "Thank you!"
Sensing that the coffee is hot, he carefully puts it into the cup holder and turns on the car engine. He waits until you're buckled in to start driving.
"So, where are we going?" He asks in utter confusion.
You let out a chuckle thinking that he's joking and Han chuckles as well, maybe it is a joke that he didn't ask Chan where to go before he started driving.
"Chris said you only need to follow the GPS," you inform.
"Oh, yeah, that's right," he feels embarrassed to ask and even more embarrassed to say that he is not good at multitasking.
It feels as if you read his mind, you look at him and say, "Don't worry. I'm a good navigator."
The cool morning air is so refreshing that Han doesn't feel sleepy anymore and with every sip of coffee, he feels more awake than ever.
He looks through the rearview mirror and sees that everyone in the back is sleeping so that means only you and him are awake in the car.
"Oh, wow, look at that," You sigh at the view of the sun rising on a hill, "It's beautiful!"
Han briefly glances away from the road to see it but the view he sees is of you and your hair flying around your face basking in the soft glow of the morning sun.
"Yeah, it's beautiful," he mutters and looks back at the road.
He's only an hour away from the destination but he likes this scene, the view and the road ahead of him, the person sitting next to him, also the faint music that plays through the car stereo. He wants to stay in it for a little longer.
"I love this song!" You exclaim out of the blue as the playlist plays a new song.
Han recognizes the song right away because it's coming from his playlist and it's one of his favorites.
"You know this song?"
"The Beatles, right?"
"Yes."
"It's in one of the playlists you sent me," you tell him.
The playlist is Han's love language. When he likes someone, instead of flowers or chocolate, he compiles a playlist of songs that reminds him of that person and gifts it to them.
When he sent them to you, Han isn't that confident that you will heartily listen to them because it's just a playlist of songs and you'd barely see the romantic gesture behind it.
"I'd like to be under the sea..." you start singing along to the song.
"In an octopus's garden in the shade..." Han joins in on the second line while keeping his eyes on the road.
"He'd let us in, knows where we've been. In his octopus's garden in the shade..." Together you sing the rest of the verse while smiling as the sun is getting higher in the sky.
"In an octopus's garden with you... In an octopus's garden with you..."
The GPS says the destination is only ten minutes away and it's directing him to turn onto the small road with nothing but trees that line up on each side.
"Are we going the right way?" Han asks you in a slight panic, not seeing any road signs.
You check the GPS and turn to look at him, "You're going the right way, yeah," you confirm.
Han bends down to see if there's any sign of life or if Chan accidentally puts the wrong address into the GPS.
"I'll wake my brother," you offer, turning around in your seat and outstretching your arm to reach Chan who's still sleeping.
You manage to grab the sleeve of his hoodie and yank at it, "Chris, wake up!"
Instead of Chan, Jinnie is the one who answers your call, "Mmh, are we there yet?" She asks.
"We're not sure," you answer and yank harder at Chan's hoodie.
Jinnie notices you need the help, she places her hand on Chan's arm and gently shakes him awake, "Chris?"
On the second try, Chan finally wakes up to Jinnie's call and you roll your eyes because it's getting ridiculous now that he recognizes her voice well instead of his sister.
Han decides to pull over to the side of the road and turns his head around, "are we going to the right place?"
Chan pulls down his hoodie and quickly brushes his curls to the back, he closes his eyes for a moment to adjust them to the light.
One glance at the GPS and he slumps back on his seat, "Yes, it's right," he slurs his words.
"Why am I not seeing anything else but trees?" Han hesitates but keeps driving anyway.
"Just keep going," Chan mumbles, getting a bottle of water and drinking it.
A moment later, Han's doubt is answered as a sign appears in front of him and it says that the campsite is 100 meters away.
"Oh, my God!" Jinnie loudly gasps, making everyone in the car startle in surprise, including Jeongin who's just woken up from his nap.
She looks at Chan with eyes widening and sparkling, "We're going camping?"
With a stupid grin on his face, Chan answers, "Yes."
-
While the boys are busy setting up the big tent, you and Jinnie are making sandwiches for lunch. Jinnie does most of the work while all you do is unwrapping the cheese singles and preparing the loaf of bread.
This is one of those moments that makes you think how can someone be this perfect? Jinnie is beautiful, smart, kind, and patient, she's great at drawing and now, you find out she's good at cooking too.
"What can't you do? Really?" You praise in awe as she meticulously arranges the ingredients from the vegetables to the condiments.
She lets out a shy chuckle in reaction and doesn't let it get to her head, she's concentrating hard on putting everything together without making a mess.
"You're an only child, right?" You curiously ask.
Jinnie wraps each sandwich with a food wrapper and does it so meticulously as if she's wrapping a gift, "Yes, I am."
"Would you like a younger sister?" You jokingly say.
She smiles at you and hands you the first sandwich she wrapped, "I already think of you as a younger sister," she says.
You grin at that and put the wrapped sandwich into the basket, "We should make it official then," you teasingly say.
"And what do you mean by that?"
"You know... you can be my sister-in-law," you coyly say while paying attention to her reaction.
Jinnie shakes her head in disbelief and shyly laughs, "You silly!"
It's too obvious for her to miss it, right? She should have known that you're hinting at something and it's your way to cajole her to open up but in the end, you're always the one left puzzled by the mystery of why Jinnie and Chan's ship is not sailing yet.
The peaceful nature sounds are interrupted by the sound of Chan hammering the spike to pin down the tent while Jeongin is setting the canopy. He pauses once he notices that you're struggling to carry the cooler box by yourself. He rushes to get it from you and puts it down next to the tent.
As a form of gratitude, you grab a can of soda from the cooler and hand it to him, "Here!"
Jeongin softly smiles and it's enough to make his dimples appear on both of his cheeks, "Thanks!"
"Baby sist, I want one too!" Chan grumbles as he sits on the ground, also exhausted from setting the tent.
It's fine when he called you that ten years ago but as you grow older, he should know that you've outgrown that pet name. You let it slide because his friends got used to hearing him calling you that around them.
"Catch!" You warn before tossing it his way and he catches it right in his hand.
Jinnie comes not long after, carrying the sandwiches along with some snacks on the side, "Lunch is ready!" She announces, putting everything on the table.
Han hurriedly carries more folded chairs and arranges them around the table. Everyone stops working to huddle around the table for lunch.
"Is it done?" Jinnie asks while distributing the sandwiches around.
"Yeah, we just need to put the mat and sleeping bags inside but we can do it later," Chan answers, ripping through the wrapper and taking a hearty bite.
Despite it being the beginning of summer, there are only two other campers on the site. But that's a good thing, it's not crowded and it won't spoil the serene, relaxing experience of camping.
The lunch feels so rewarding, especially to those who worked on the tent and everyone gets so quiet after. You and Jinnie work together to gather the trash and put it into a plastic bag.
"So... what now?" Jeongin asks, glancing his eyes from side to side.
Chan crumples the empty can in his hand and puts it into the trash bag, "We're resting for now and we'll go hiking in an hour."
"Hiking?" Han asks in panic, not in favor of the idea.
"I told you to bring hiking boots for one specific reason," Chan explains, putting his hat backward and then reclining on his seat.
Han slumps on his seat and makes those high-pitched groans while flailing his arms in the air.
To avoid the harsh sunlight, the hike starts a little after three and the boys are tasked to carry a backpack full of snacks, water, and clean clothes.
The forest hums with life as the five of you walk the trail with the sun breaks through the cracks, lighting up the dirt path ahead, decorated with outgrown roots, wildflowers, and fallen leaves that crunch beneath your feet.
You're gazing up at the canopy, searching for the birds that sing sweetly against the soft sound of the wind whistling between the leaves.
Chan leads the way and once in a while, he looks back to check if anyone needs a break. Seeing that everyone needs a break, he stops on his track and turns around.
"Let's have a quick break!" He announces to everyone, then uncaps a bottle of water to hand it to you.
"Thank you," you mutter.
You lean back against the tree and reorganize your breath to finally have a long sip of water that quench your thirst.
"Is it still far?" Jinnie asks, taking a new bottle of water from Han's backpack.
Chan swallows his water and wipes his lips after, "About half an hour more of hiking."
Han takes off the plaid shirt he's wearing and hangs it on one shoulder, "And how long have we been hiking?"
Chan looks at his smartwatch to be able to answer him, "About 25 minutes."
"Fuck!" Han curses, scaring away the small animals hiding between the bushes, "Why does it feel like we've been walking for hours?"
"That's just you," Jeongin sneers, drinking his water like he's shooting an advertisement video.
"It's going to be worth it, I swear," Chan convinces, brushing his hair to the back before putting his hat back on.
Hanging on to his words, everyone continues the hike, following Chan's lead while enjoying the greenery. Jeongin catches squirrels running in between tree trunks.
"Han, say hi to your friends!" He says to Han.
Funny that Han decides to play along with it, "Furry babies, hi!"
Chan notices that you're getting exhausted as beads of sweat roll down your neck, "Here! Hold the back of my t-shirt!"
You don't see why it would help you walk, "Why should I?" You ask in utter confusion.
He grabs your hands and makes you hold each side of his t-shirt, dragging you along with him as he tirelessly keeps following the trail.
"I swear to God if it isn't worth it like you said..." you grumble as you feel every muscle in your legs strained and screaming in pain, and your mouth is dry from you constantly panting, running out of breath.
The scenery slightly changes the further you walk, there are no more dead leaves on the path and the rich earthy smell is soon replaced by water-saturated air.
"Oi, look!" Chan taps your hand and then points at the view ahead of him.
Getting a glimpse of what lies ahead, you walk past Chan to discover a view that is too beautiful for your eyes to comprehend.
A white, frothy cascade of water falls into a plunge pool with mist billowing out in soft clouds, creating a mystical atmosphere but when the sun hits and refracts the lights, a rainbow appears.
It's a waterfall, a majestic one.
"Be careful! It's slippery!" Chan shouts, watching you walk down the rocky outcroppings. He knows that there's no stopping you and you can't hear him anyway.
Han dashes after you with the backpack bouncing on his back, trailing after you like a puppy.
"I was right to trust you," Jinnie stands by his side and places a hand on Chan's shoulder, "It's worth the one hour of hike."
Jinnie shoots him a warm smile that makes Chan's inside melt and turns into jelly and in response to that, Chan unknowingly grins at her, the kind that shows how much of a fool he is for her.
Unbeknownst to him, Jeongin has been quietly watching this interaction, including the shit-eating grin Chan has on his face.
"You're pathetic," Jeongin says to him once Jinnie leaves.
"Hey!" He yells in disagreement but Jeongin ignores him and walks away.
Taking a little rest from the hiking, Chan sits on the sun-baked rocks while admiring the waterfall and the serene surroundings.
"This is a beautiful place to tell someone your feelings," Jeongin says, taking out a can of soda from his backpack.
Chan scoffs and plays dumb, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, come on!" Jeongin groans and subtly rolls his eyes at him.
"We all know you have feelings for someone," he pauses to gesture at the figure standing on the rocky perch, "There she is!"
This proves two things, their years of friendship and that Jeongin always observes, either way, he feels so caught by his own ineptness.
Worse, Chan decides to keep playing dumb and looks away even though it's too late for him to do that, there's no way he can escape Jeongin's observant eyes.
"Why-why should I..." he scratches his head in a slight panic.
"Just tell her how you feel," Jeongin says, "I think she feels the same thing for you."
At first, Chan wants to keep it to himself but since Jeongin knows already and it's tiring to have to keep hiding, he decides to tell him.
"It's hard," he openly admits with a heavy sigh, "We've been close friends for too long that I can't tell the difference anymore."
It feels so good that Chan is finally able to get that out of this chest and he knows he can trust Jeongin to keep it between them.
"And she's just... she's just perfect," Chan says with a hopeless sigh, he picks up a pebble and throws it into the water, "and I don't want to lose my good friend."
Jeongin leans back by propping his hands behind him and lets out a sigh, "It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they're perfect for each other," he eloquently remarks.
"Wait, I think I heard that somewhere before," Chan's forehead wrinkles as he rakes his brain to recall where he heard this line before.
All of a sudden, Jeongin punches him in the arm, "It's from your favorite movie. Good Will Hunting!"
"Oh?!" Chan loudly gasps, it feels like a crime that he doesn't recognize the quote taken from his favorite movie.
"At this point, Han will beat you up to it."
"What?"
"He'll date your sister faster than you get to date Jinnie," Jeongin says with sheer indignation.
Chan's eyes dart at you and Han talking under the shade of a tree that stoops so low it's almost touching the surface of the water.
"Ugh, no, that can't happen!" He says in disgust.
"I bet he's serenading your sister with the jingle he made, again," Jeongin mumbles.
At the same time, Jeongin and Chan look at each other and start singing the jingle together, surprising themselves by how well they memorized it.
"Are you guys talking about me?" Jinnie jokingly asks as she walks by.
They immediately shut up and Chan turns his head away even though his eyes are searching for her, demanding her to always be in his sight.
"Are we waiting for Christmas to swim or what?" Han shouts, fussing like a child with his hands planted on each side of his waist.
-
Han once thought that if someone ever gets to see your body, he believes they'd turn to stone and that's because he thinks no one can handle that much magnetism and sex appeal.
Today, he gets to put that notion to a test even though he's risking himself to the possibility of getting petrified. He tries to keep his cool as you stand not far from him, tugging the hem of your t-shirt and then pulling it over your head, revealing the top half of the swimsuit you're wearing underneath.
So far, he still finds himself breathing and able to move his limbs but let's see when— he holds his breath as you unbutton your denim shorts and pull it down, slightly bending down to get it off your legs.
His eyes immediately travel down your body, admiring every curve of your body as you bask in the warm sunlight and the tiny droplets of water land on your skin.
You flip your hair to the back and slip your fingers under the strap to adjust it on your shoulder, his breath hitches as you pull it and let it slap against your skin.
Now, he's petrified. He knows he shouldn't be ogling at his best friend's sister, especially with her brother around but he can't help it, he's instinctively attracted to you like a moth drawn to light.
Jinnie offers her hand at you as she's already in her swimsuit as well, "Come on!" She says.
You take her hand and giggle as you slowly make your way toward the water with pebbles against the bottom of your bare feet.
"Ack!" You shriek, feeling a shock of cold water touching your feet then back to giggling again.
Han realizes that if he doesn't want to miss anything, he should get changed now. He gets up from the bed of rock he's sitting on and finds Chan is already hallway to get naked, exposing his muscular upper body, his pale skin shines under the sun.
"Show off," he mutters, placing a gentle slap on his abs as he walks past him.
"What's that for?" Chan says with a perplexed look.
The breeze plays with Han's hair as he treads the water and more droplets of water hit his skin the closer he gets to where you are
For a second, he loses sight of you until you emerge from the surface of the water, glistening wet with your swimsuit stuck to your skin, enhancing the features of your heavenly body.
You're saying something to Jinnie as you're floating in the water but the words are lost in the roar of the waterfall. With a grin plastered on your face, he doesn't need to hear it to know you're having fun.
"Hey, come here," you shout in his direction.
Han looks around thinking you're talking to someone else but there's no one else but him there. He looks back at you and you're already making your way to him.
"I want to show you something cool," you say, taking his hand and dragging him with you.
Honestly, he's willing to go anywhere you take him even if you take him to the pit of hell and sweat he'll follow you there.
"Now, we have to dive in," you say, getting to the center of the pool where it's deep enough for a dive.
Han draws a big, deep breath before following you where you lead him, he sees through the blurry water where your figure is diving to and then comes out of the water.
You wipe the water off your face and put your hair away, "It's cool, isn't it?"
Han doesn't realize it at first but once he rubs the water off his eyes, he's standing on the other side of the waterfall, and behind him is a tall, slippery wall of rock.
It's just you and him, concealed behind an iridescent wall of water.
"Yeah," he nods as he looks at you to which you respond with a smile.
Out of nowhere, two figures emerge out of the water and startle you both. It's Jeongin and Jinnie, discovering the spot and finding you both there.
"Wow! This is amazing!" Jinnie gasps as she looks around while wiping the water off her mouth.
Jeongin doesn't say anything but stands close to the back, his skin a contrast with the dark of the rocky wall behind him.
The smile on Han's face slowly fades knowing that someone has shattered the tender moment he's having with you. He looks at you and your eyes are nowhere near his eyes, the next thing he knows, you dive your way out back to the world.
The fun continues as you and Chan team up to fight against Jinnie and Han. He's carrying you on his shoulders and clashing you at Jinnie who also rides on Han's shoulders, coming at each other until one of you falls into the water. Thanks to Chan's strong lower half body, you won most of the time.
Tired from swimming, everyone is chilling on the big bed of rock, drinking and eating the snacks they packed while drying up under the warm afternoon sun.
With your fingers pruning up, you're struggling to open a bag of chips and someone takes it to help you to open it.
"Here," Jeongin says, after swiftly opening it for you.
"Thanks," you mutter.
Jinnie let out a sigh as she hugs her knees, "I think this is the most fun I ever had in a long time."
Han gets up from lying down and puts his arm around her shoulder, "That's true."
Chan triumphantly grins as he uncaps a new bottle of water, "I told you guys to trust me."
"I trusted you," Jeongin mutters in defense.
Chan points at Han as he drinks his water, hinting that he's talking about a specific person. Grinning as he sees Han feeling called out by that.
"I didn't say anything," he defends himself, waving his hand in front of him in strong disagreement with Chan's accusation.
"Yeah but you were like whining the whole hike," Chan says, giving him a head shake of disbelief.
"I didn't," he resists to admit it, then looks at Jinnie to seek someone on his back, "I didn't, right?"
Jinnie looks at him and then looks at everyone, "Well, I wouldn't call it whining," she says.
Han glares at her as he senses a but trailing behind Jinnie's sentence. He puts his arm away from her and grumbles, "You know what? I'll not say anything on the hike way back."
On the hike way back, Han doesn't whine like he promised but he makes grunting noises. Chan knows he wants to complain but he wants to stick true to his own words.
He guides the hike back with you by his side and he's been catching you looking back a few times. He scoffs, knowing his sister so well to know that you're not just looking, you have eyes on someone.
"Who is it, baby sist?" He curiously asks.
You snap your head back and look ahead, "Huh? What?" You play coy.
With his hand on your shoulder, he stops you on your track and looks into your eyes, "I'm your brother. I know when my sister likes someone," he states.
You sigh because that's true, you can't hide the things from someone you've grown up your whole life with.
"Yeah, okay, you got me," you say in defeat.
"I didn't think much about it then but now, he's always in my head," you share, surprised that you don't find it awkward to tell personal things like this with him. Deep down you know it's not awkwardness you feel, you fear that Chan wouldn't be accepting of your choice.
"So, what do you think?"
Chan softly laughs and offers his hand at you as support to climb the outgrown tree roots, he waits until you safely land on the other side to answer.
"Well, I don't really have a say on that, do I?" he says.
"As far as I remember, you're really against it," you say, reminding him of the same ultimatum he says to his friends plenty of times.
"Yeah, but you know, as long as you're happy," he answers, along with a coy shrug.
Out of the blue, he playfully nudges your shoulder with his, "Ooo, baby sist is falling in love," he teasingly says.
You shove him hard until he's staggering to the side, "Stop calling me that!" You slap his big arm with each word.
Chan is as protective as a brother can be but he knows that he can't dictate every aspect of your life, including the person you like. However, as your brother, his opinions matter and it feels good to know that you have his approval.
-
The sun is setting when everyone returns to the campsite, painting the sky with bursts of red and yellow, gradually sending the day into the calm of night.
Before it gets dark, Chan orders everyone to work for dinner, he and Jeongin immediately build a campfire and the rest are setting the gas stove to cook.
"Can I help you with something?" Han offers his help to you and Jinnie who's busy prepping ingredients for dinner.
Jinnie hands him a pot, "Can you fill it with water?"
"How much water?"
"Just fill it full," she answers.
"Got it!" He takes the pot with him and comes back a few minutes later, carrying the pot of water with a lot of focus and cautiousness.
"Where do I put it?" He asks in a panic.
Jinnie gets out of the way to make space for him, "Here! On the stove!" She says.
He is concentrating hard on putting it right on the stove without spilling a drop, "How do you turn it on?"
You look away from the vegetables you're chopping and notice something on Han's leg, it seems like he scraped his knee without him knowing.
"Goodness, Han!" You gasp.
"Wh-what?" He asks in panic, looking at you in worry when he should be worried about himself.
"Your knee is bleeding," you point at the blood gushing out of his scraped knee. You scramble to find something for his wound.
Jinnie gets ahead of you, she comes with a bottle of water to wash the blood and tells him to sit down as she runs to the tent to get a first aid kit.
"Does it hurt?" You ask, finally find a napkin for it.
Han is surprisingly calm about it as he gently places the napkin over his wound, "I think I hurt my knee when I was getting water."
Chan pauses on grilling the meat to know what the ruckus is about, "What's going on?"
"Hannie scraped his knee," you shortly answer.
Jinne comes through with her bag of first-aid kit and pulls out a tube of ointment, she takes a dollop with a cotton bud and with so much gentleness, she dabs Han's wound with it.
Han hisses and winces in pain, reacting to the treatment and Jinnie quickly blows on it to soothe the pain.
"I just need to put a band-aid on it," she says and proceeds to take one from the pack. She puts a lot of care into covering his wound with it then sighs in relief.
"Thank you, Jinnie," Han sincerely says while holding the side of his knee.
Jinnie looks up as she's kneeling in front of him and warmly smiles, "You're very welcome, Han."
Despite the minor incident, dinner was a success as everyone finished the food in under an hour, and there was no better way to end a tiring yet fulfilling day than with cans of cold beer.
The night brings such a silence that the crackle of the campfire is all that could be heard with the sparks flickering and drifting upward. The smell of smoke mixed with the sweet smell of roasted marshmallows.
Being the good brother he is, Chan hands you the smores he made and takes the stick of marshmallow you're still roasting.
"Thanks," you mutter, wasting no time to bite into that gooey, crunchy sweetness.
Han wants to do the same for you, he makes smores out of the marshmallow he roasted a little too long and nudges Jeongin by the elbow.
"Pass it to her," he whispers, asking for his help to deliver it to you.
Jeongin doesn't say anything but takes it from him and without hesitation, he bites right into it.
"Hey, I made it for her!" He scolds him, putting his hands around Jeongin's neck to choke and force him to spit the smores he ate. That doesn't faze him, Jeongin has another bite to finish it and has no problem swallowing it down.
Thinking that Han is mad because Jeongin ate his smores, Jinnie gives the one she made to him as a consolation, "Here. You can have mine."
Han looks at it and feels bad to take it, "I– It's okay, I'm full anyway," he lies with a grin.
The night is a special kind of blackness, the kind that wants only to hold the stars and help them shine all the brighter. You tilt your head up and see those stars like pinpricks against the dark of night.
"Woah, look at those stars..." You sigh in wonder.
Everyone else follows suit, looking up at the night sky and feeling the same feeling of awe. When we realize how vast the universe is, our matters suddenly feel so small, don't you think?
"I have something to share with you guys," Jeongin suddenly announces.
Everyone stops staring at the night sky and looking at Jeongin, some are merely curious and the rest are anticipating what he tries to share.
"Remember when I told you guys I auditioned to join the Royal Orchestra?"
"Yeah, a couple of times," Chan says, bobbing his head at him.
"Last month I got the letter," he shares further.
"Oh!" Jinnie gasps in excitement even though Jeongin is not finished with the announcement yet.
Jeongin looks down at the blazing fire that gnaws on the logs of wood, making everyone wait for him to continue. After a while, he looks up and finally announces, "Well, I got in."
"Oh, my Gosh..." Chan sighs in relief with one hand clutching his chest.
"Yeah, man!" Han gives him a celebratory punch in the arm then puts his arm around him, "I just knew you'd get in."
"Duh!" Jinnie eggs in, "You're a great pianist, they're stupid if they didn't let you in."
"Congratulations, Jeongin! We're so proud of you," Chan says, giving him a pat on the back and a proud smile that exudes his paternal side towards Jeongin.
Jeongin looks at you and his eyes drop to his hands, "Which also means that I'll leave soon," he continues with shocking news.
The smiles on everyone's faces slowly fade at that announcement, it turns quiet again as everyone processes that there's a downside to this happy news. Jinnie looks devastated and she rests her head on Chan's shoulder to seek comfort.
"When do you have to leave?" Han asks.
"Next month," Jeongin replies.
"So... this will be the last time we're going to be together?" Jinnie sadly asks even though she's on the verge of tears already.
"Guys, I'm not dying," Jeongin says with an attitude.
Everyone lightly chuckles at that, Chan rearranges the logs to keep the bonfire alive and looks at Jeongin.
"How long will you be there?"
"It's a two-year contract," he answers.
Jinnie sniffles and puts on a small smile, "Just promise us that you'll always come to our weekly video meeting," she demands.
Jeongin chuckles and nods, crossing his fingers together as he says, "Promise!"
"Two years isn't that long," Han coyly says, poking the burned log with a tree branch.
"By the time I get back, I expect one of you to already be married to someone," Jeongin jokingly says, secretly throwing a glance at Chan and raising his eyebrow at him.
"I'm getting drowsy," you say, stretching your arms up and tilting your head side to side, "I'm going to head in and sleep."
Jinnie lifts her head off of Chan's shoulder and crosses her arms together in front of her, "Yeah, I'm going to sleep as well," she says.
It's getting late and the night only grows colder, Chan decides that it's time to sleep. He volunteers to put out the bonfire while Jeongin heads straight into the tent.
After taking a quick trip to the bathroom, Han enters the tent and sees that the sleeping bags have been arranged. Jinnie takes the farthest right and you're sleeping next to her, bundled in the warmth of your sleeping bag.
The middle one belongs to Chan and since Jeongin takes the farthest left which means he's going to be sleeping between them. He slips himself into his sleeping bag and turns his head only to find that you're still awake.
"I thought you're sleeping already," he lowly mutters.
You don't say anything but smile at him with your eyes soft and tender, blanketing his heart with warm feelings.
When it occurs to him that he's sleeping in this shared space with you, he gets that fluttering feeling inside, a kaleidoscope of butterflies flying around in his stomach.
"Goodnight, Han," you lowly murmur.
"Goodnight," he murmurs back, not taking his eyes off of you until you turn your head to the other side.
Han continues to admire your profile from the side, your eyes, your nose, and the plump of your lips that he's dying to taste. You're so beautiful and he gets to enjoy that beauty as much as he pleases.
"I'm surprised I didn't find you snoring already," Chan says as he enters the tent and zips it close.
Then there's the brother who always ruins this special moment. Han turns his head away and scoots slightly to the side to make more space for Chan, knowing how big he is.
"Let's see who gets to snore first," Han dares him.
The next thing he knows, Han finds himself in the forest again and he can hear you laughing. He looks up and finds you standing next to him with your hair wet and your feet bare.
"Take you somewhere..." you vaguely say.
Han doesn't answer but takes your hand, together you're walking through the forest. He feels the rough stone handholds against the palms and fingertips and tall lush grass sliding across calves.
Then he looks at you and you're smiling at him, your eyes bright and droplets of water are dripping down the end of your hair.
"It's cool," you say, laughing at him.
He thinks you find something funny about him so he starts to grope his body around and checks what is it that makes you laugh.
"Come here," you say, giggling with your hand still holding his.
"What?" He asks.
"It's cool," you say again, then you take the straps of your swimsuit and pull them down your shoulders. You're giggling while keep pulling the straps down, revealing your bare chest to him little by little until—
"Han, wake up!"
The image blurs as someone shakes his body awake. He ignores it and tries to go back to sleep, hoping that he gets to continue the dream.
"Wake up!"
"Ugh... mmh," he incoherently complains and curls up in his sleeping bag.
"Just let him sleep," you say to someone.
Han's eyes snap open the second he hears your voice, he then scrambles out of his sleeping bag, disoriented with his hair tousled.
"Are you coming?"
Without looking, Han can tell that it's Chan's voice.
"I'm coming, yes, coming," he mumbles with half-shut eyes.
He shivers as cold air blows into the tent, he gropes around for his jacket with eyes barely open, "What time is it?"
"It's four," Chan answers.
"In the afternoon?" He gasps in shock, can't believe that he slept through the day.
"In the morning," Chan corrects him.
It's even more shocking that he wakes up at four in the morning when the sun is not even out yet. He opens his mouth to complain but he sees you coming into the tent.
"Chris, can I borrow one of your hoodies?" You ask.
Han grabs what he assumes is his hoodie and hurriedly gives it to you, "You can wear mine," he offers with a sleepy smile.
Chan takes it from his hand and then gives it to you, "Hurry up! It's sunrise in any minute now," he rushes him.
Han is barely functioning but he tries to keep up with the group, walking through the path in the dark of the night that still lingers and the stars that insist on shining bright against the bruised sky.
He rushes to walk next to you while hugging himself to shield himself from the cold, "Where are we going?"
"Just to the top of that hill," you answer, looking beautiful even with your face bare and your eyes puffy from the lack of sleep.
It gets tricky as the path turns into climbing the rocky outcroppings and it's a bit embarrassing that you're the one helping him not the other way around.
"There she is," Chan says, pointing to the golden disk that rises on the horizon with its honeyed glow.
It is the time when the day casts away the cloak of night and makes an entrance with a bright, gold light of warmth, making it known that she rules the day once and forever more.
Jinnie walks up to Chan's side and stands so close to him, arms brushing and elbows grazing.
"It's like you have to whisper," Jinnie murmurs, thinking that she would disrupt the serene view by talking loudly.
When Chan looks at her, he realizes one thing. Jinnie is like the sunrise, she doesn’t care if anyone watches it or not, she will keep on being beautiful, even if no one bothers to look at it.
"You know what, Chris?" She suddenly asks.
"Yes?"
"This is one of those moments that I'll share with my future husband and children," she says, her eyes set on the sun that keeps on rising, gently and swiftly at once.
Hearing her talking about the future makes Chan wants to make it all true for her and have the chance to tell her future children, 'Yes, Dad was there too'. Just the thought of it already makes him so giddy that he finds himself smiling.
Jinnie slowly rests her head on his shoulder to enjoy the sunrise together and Chan gets what she said earlier, he also feels like saying things out loud would only ruin the moment so he decides to keep it in his heart a little longer.
"Ugh! He's stressing me out," You mutter to yourself, seeing Jinnie and Chan sharing an intimate moment and instead of using this as an opportunity to say something, Chan does nothing but stare at her like usual.
"That's my hoodie," Someone says.
You turn to the side and find Jeongin there, "Sorry?"
"You're wearing my hoodie," he says, pointing to the hoodie you're wearing which you thought belonged to Han.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know," you meekly say, torn between keeping it on or not, but you know you need it, it's so cold to take it off.
"That's okay," Jeongin says, leaning on the rock next to you.
It's hard to interact with Jeongin because he rarely talks, he only talks when he has important things to say or has savage takes on things. You hesitate to talk to him without feeling like you'll waste his time. Still... you muster up the courage only to get interrupted by Han's head lolling onto your shoulder.
You check on him and see that he's falling back to sleep. You quickly put your arm around him to keep the back of his head from hitting the rock.
"We should have let him sleep," Jeongin says.
"Yeah," you respond with a soft laugh.
Now that he's speaking to you, you use this as an opportunity to congratulate him, "I didn't get the chance last night but congratulations for joining the Royal orchestra," you tell him.
Jeongin brushes his hair to the back and then clears his throat, "Thank you."
"I went to one of your shows two months back," you share and instantly regret doing it, what are you expecting though? For him to thank you.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Jeongin asks, he seems to find it important to know the reason.
"Well, I just... I don't know, I don't want to disturb you and I was with a friend anyway so..." you vaguely explain.
There's no other reason why you came to his show except to watch him playing his piano, you thought of seeing him after the show but you were afraid that he'd be too busy for that.
"We could have hung out. I'd treat you to dinner," he says while scratching his ear.
"That sounds nice," you comment with a smile.
"I'm not a cheapskate like Han," he jokingly adds with a soft laugh.
"Well, I was think— Oh!" You abruptly stop talking as Han nuzzles his head further into your neck and puts his arm across your chest.
Jeongin gets on his feet and makes you switch places with him. He takes Han's arm from around your shoulder, offering himself for him to lean on instead of you.
"Is Han sleeping?" Chan asks, noticing his friend is draping on Jeongin's shoulder.
"I told you to let him sleep," you grumble at him.
The walk back isn't as bad as the climb, Han is being dragged by Chan to make sure of his safe return to the campsite. Jeongin is tasked to brew coffee for everyone while Jinnie and Chan are making breakfast together. You volunteer to tidy up the tent and fold the sleeping bags.
Once you're done, you join everyone around the campfire and Jeongin immediately hands you a cup of coffee.
"Thank you," you mutter, holding it with both hands to absorb the heat.
Chan mischievously slaps Han's shoulder, startling him awake from his sleep and making him jolt on the chair.
"Time for breakfast!" He informs him.
He looks at him with wondering eyes, stretches his arms out, and then lets out a big yawn. Even with a barely functioning brain, Han knows that it's time to eat, he takes a plate and a piece of toast.
"Here. Have an egg," Jinnie says, sliding an egg onto his plate from the frypan.
She then turns at you and says, "You too."
You hurriedly grab a plate and mutter your gratitude at her, wasting no time to start digging in. Soon, everyone is stuffing their mouth with food and it gets quiet that you can hear the forest come alive around you.
"We're going to drive the whole day today," Chan informs out of nowhere.
"Can we know where we're going now?" Jinnie asks, taking a bite of her bread.
Chan pulls out something out of his jeans pocket, a piece of paper but he continues to unfold it open. With an excited grin, he turns it around and reveals a poster.
"How long have you been keeping that poster in the back of your jeans?" Jeongin curiously asks, then takes a small sip of his coffee.
Not getting the reaction he expected, Chan frowns and his shoulders slumped. Han snatches the poster from his hands and looks at it with utter bewilderment.
"What? Did you get tickets to this? How?" He asks with his cheeks full of food.
You don't recognize it at first until you see the logo of the band and gasp in surprise, "Am I seeing The Hare concert poster?"
The grin blooms on Chan's face once more, "More like the poster for their secret gig this Friday night," he humbly brags.
"What?" You ask again with eyes widening.
Han roughly yanks the sleeve of Chan's sweater, "How did you get the tickets?"
"Let's say I knew someone who knows someone," Chan cryptically says, deciding not to tell everyone how he acquired those tickets.
"Anyway, I think it's better if the girls take turns to drive first," he continues with the planning.
"Yep. It's best if you boys get some rest before driving all night," Jinnie agrees, already collecting the trash from around the table.
You're representing everyone when you say that Jinnie and Chan make a great team, they're the ones who came up with the planning and handled the financial stuff, and they make sure everyone is doing well and having fun. They're basically playing parents to you, Han, and Jeongin which adds one more reason why they should date as soon as possible.
-
Jinnie offers to take the first turn to drive and Chan is the last one to get into the car as he has to return the rented tent and pay for it.
"Everyone please make sure you've checked your belongings," Chan says as he puts his safety belt on.
Jinnie turns on the car engine and checks everything, her safety belt, and the angle of the rearview mirror, and then adjusts the seat.
"Do you mind if I play music from my phone?" You ask.
"Not at all," Jinnie replies, tucking her hair behind her ear as she backs the car from the parking lot and starts driving.
Not long after the car driving through the main road, Han startles in the backseat and then asks, "How long have we been driving?"
Chan glances at his smartwatch and turns his head to the back, "About 35 minutes. Why?"
"I want to pee," Han says, his face doesn't show any expression but it makes his face appear so round.
"Can you hold it?" Chan asks.
Han considers it for a moment then slowly leans back on his seat, "Yeah, I'll– I'll hold it," he doubtfully says.
"Distract yourself, you know, think of something so you don't want to pee anymore," Chan suggests.
"Think of the waterfall we went to yesterday," Jeongin playfully adds with a suppressed laugh.
"Hey!" Chan slaps Jeongin's arm, saying the opposite of what he suggested.
"I'll try to sleep," Han finds a better solution to detain his urge to pee.
"That's a great idea!" Chan says.
It's a good thing that Han is one of those people who can sleep anytime anywhere. He manages to sleep through two hours long of drive until the urge comes back.
"Guys, I don't think I can hold it anymore," he mutters, biting his lower lip until it turns pale.
Jinnie looks at him through the rearview mirror and sees how he can't hold the urge anymore, "The sign says rest area is only 10 kilometers away," she informs.
Han grips the headrest of Jeongin's headrest, "Okay."
"Are we good?" Jinnie asks.
"Yeah," he meekly answers.
"Just a few more minutes," you convince him.
There's nothing you can do to help him but you can relate to that feeling, you look back to check on him once in a while.
"Jinnie?" He calls again.
"Yeah?"
"Please step on the gas!" Han says, looking a little pale now.
Considering the urgency of the situation, Jinnie allows herself to go above the speed limit, she steps on the gas and the car picks up the speed, launching the car forward.
Sensing the change in speed, Chan wakes up from his nap and looks around in confusion. But the first thing he does when he gains his sense is check on Jinnie.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
"Han needs to pee," you answer for her since she focuses on driving.
"Almost there!" Jinnie says as she changes the lane to enter the rest area.
Han hops out of the car once the car gets to the parking lot of the rest area and immediately runs to search for the bathroom.
Once the car is parked, Jinnie lets out a sigh and leans back on her seat, "That was the most intense ten minutes I ever had in my life," Jinnie says.
Seeing the hilarity of it all, the three of you burst into laughter almost at the same time, making it one of those memorable little things that happened on this road trip.
The laughter wakes Jeongin up from his nap and he looks confused as to why everyone is laughing, "What's happening?"
No one is answering him but keep laughing until we're running out of air. Oh, there's nothing like the deep breaths after laughing that hard. 
-
Since they're stopping at a rest area and it's close to lunchtime, they may as well take a break from driving to ear. Everyone scatters the second they step into the food court to order the food they want. You decide on a bowl of ramen and get in the queue with Jinnie behind you.
Even though he's already carrying a tray of food in his hands, Chan stops next to the queue and scans the menu.
"Hey, baby sist!" He loudly calls you.
The people in the queue turn their heads to see who he calls baby sist, you hurriedly turn your back to them and glare at Chan.
"Please don't address me with that name in public," You scold him through your gritted teeth.
"Order a portion of fried dumplings for me," he says, ignoring your complaint and leaving with a grin.
Everyone gathers at one of the long tables in the middle of the food court with their choices of lunch, you slide the plate of fried dumplings at Chan and steal one piece with your chopsticks.
"You better not drink a lot of sodas if you have a weak bladder," Jeongin and his savage intake make an appearance.
Han pretends not to hear him and continues to stuff his cheek with more food.
The lunch is not enough, so everyone scatter once more to buy snacks. You're getting a bag of mini fish-shaped cakes for desserts and Han appears behind you with a big smile on his face.
"Got you ice cream," he says.
"How nice of you!" You delightfully exclaim.
"I don't know what you like so I chose three flavors at once," he explains the different flavors of ice cream in one cone.
"Thank you," you mutter your gratitude with a smile.
"I have to go for another bathroom break," he says with a grin lingering on his face, then leaves the other way.
The ice cream would make a great dessert if it didn't have strawberry ice cream in the mix. It's obvious that Han completely forgot that you're allergic to it, you can't eat it, or throw it away. You can give it to Chan but Han would know that you're not eating the ice cream he specifically bought for you and he would find that disrespectful, or worse, upset him.
Making your way out of the food court, you carry the bag of snacks in one hand and the ice cream in the other, still have no idea what to do with it.
Out of nowhere, Jeongin comes from the side, also carrying an ice cream in hand. He takes the one from your hand and switches it with him, a chocolate-flavored one.
"You can have mine," he says, not waiting to bite right into the ice cream.
Not only that he remember your allergy, but he also comes with a new ice cream and you find that endearing. You let out a mix of scoff and laugh, "I've never seen someone bite into ice cream."
"Well, there's always a first time to everything," he coyly says.
-
It's your turn to drive now and thankfully, you have set up an hour-long playlist for it. Jinnie remains in the front, sitting on the passenger's side and putting her legs up as she draws on her sketchbook.
The boys don't find it hard to fall back to sleep after a hearty lunch, you lower the volume of the music and only hum along to the song currently playing in the car to not wake the sleeping beauties in the back.
"What do you think?" Jinnie asks, holding her sketchbook out to you.
You keep the steering wheel steady to glance at the rough drawing of you from her point of view, then look back straight ahead.
"Wow. That's good!" You compliment.
Jinnie is a great illustrator, she mostly does illustrations for children's books and magazines which explains her exceptional talent for drawing.
"Please tell me you'll finish it and then email it to me," you say, already planning on making it your profile picture for your social media.
"I'll finish it when I'm not in a moving vehicle," she says, putting her pencil back into its case and putting it on the dashboard along with the sketchbook.
"I think it's cute," Jinnie says while stretching her arms to the front.
"What cute?" You ask with a perplexed smile.
"The way Chris calls you baby sist," she answers.
Oh, she must be talking about that little incident that happened back at the food court. You nod and tap your steering wheel to the rhythm of the song playing.
"Look, I don't mind when call me that in front of you guys. Just don't do it in front of a bunch of strangers," you explain, briefly shifting your focus to driving by a big truck.
"I mean... what if there are cute guys there and they heard it," you playfully remark.
Jinnie softly chuckles and grabs a bottle of water from the cup holder, "You're beautiful and smart, you shouldn't have any problems getting a cute guy," she says.
"That I agree!" You jokingly say with a sassy eyebrow raise.
When it occurs to you that this would be the perfect opportunity to have another crack at her, you arrange the words in your head before saying them out loud.
"I can say the same thing about you, Jinnie. You're beautiful and smart, except you have a lot of patience in you," you pause for a chuckle and briefly glance at her, "you shouldn't have any problems getting a hot guy."
Jinnie gets quiet and you begin to think that your words offended her in a way yet you give it another moment for her to digest your words thoroughly. She suddenly looks back, probably making sure that none of the boys are listening in on this conversation.
"I'm just a girl," Jinnie meekly says, lowering her voice as she slightly slumps in her seat, "All I can do is wait for the other person to profess their feelings to me."
Oh, finally! You manage to successfully crack her this time. You keep your cool and continue to crack deeper into it.
"I have to stop you right there!" You tell her with your hand raised, making a stop sign at her.
"You're not just a girl, you're incredible!" You may have exaggerated your tone a little bit but she needs to hear the truth in your words.
"You're not just beautiful and smart, you're kind, compassionate and you're strong and gentle at the same time. And if I'm being honest, I look up to you a lot," you openly admit.
"Aww..." Jinnie coos, she seems to be taking your compliments well along with a shy smile.
"And a girl like you shouldn't wait. A girl like you take matters into your own hands and you know, tell him how you feel," you encourage her.
Yeah, okay, maybe there's an underlying motive here but that doesn't make what you said to her a lie.
"It's a different thing when the person you like is your friend and you've been close with that person for so long," Jinnie sighs, her voice drops lower and she seems smaller than ever.
However, the mystery is now solved. Jinnie is indeed having the same feeling, she's hesitant only because they've been friends for too long. You get it that sometimes it's a bit scary to date someone who knows so much about you but if you focus on the good side, it means that they'll be more accepting and understanding towards your qualities.
If there are two people who truly deserve each other, it's Chan and Jinnie.
"Isn't that a good thing? You've known each other long enough to learn so much about each other and understand each other better," you give her your opinion and secretly glance to see her reaction.
Jinnie plays with the lint on her jeans as she digests your words while looking at the ever-changing scenery as the car keeps moving forward.
"You're right," she finally responds to your words.
Now, that you've tried your best to give her that little push, you can only hope for the outcome and hopefully, it'll be the best one.
"I know I'm right," you confidently remark, then burst into laughter.
Unbeknownst to you and Jinnie, Chan has been listening all along and behind his dark hoodie, he's smiling from ear to ear.
-
After stopping for dinner, the trip continues with Chan behind the wheel and Jeongin on his side. Jinnie takes the middle seat with Han and you occupy the backseat, using the extra space to curl up and sleep.
It's a bummer that you're not sitting next to him but this way, Han can easily look to the back and see you peacefully sleeping with a hand under your head, lost in your sweet dream.
"Hey, Han, can you get me a can of soda?" Chan asks without looking at him.
Since he's too busy watching you sleep, Han doesn't hear it the first time and snaps his head to the front, "What?"
"Get me a soda," Chan repeats while holding his arm out to the back so Han can hand it right into his hand.
Han rummages inside the small cooler box next to his feet, grabbing the first can that rolls into his hand and putting it into Chan's hand.
"Thanks!" Chan shortly says to him.
The road is eerily empty as it turns smaller from four into two lanes and the last sliver of sun has fully disappeared, replaced by the soft moonlight on a hot summer night.
Having nothing to do, Jeongin looks into the GPS to assess the route and the final destination.
"It says we'll arrive at 7 in the morning," he says.
"Yep, there's no hurry. We have plenty of time until the gig," Chan calmly says, still holding the soda in his hand, unopened.
Jeongin reclines on his seat and crosses his arms together on his chest, "And what we're going to do until then?"
"I booked us rooms at a hotel nearby," Chan informs, "we'll have some rest before leave in the afternoon."
"Hotel, right? Not motel?" Jeongin asks with suspicious eyes because the last time they stayed at the motel, he had to share the bed with Han.
"Yes," Chan hastily answers.
"I'm going to get my own room," Jeongin says.
"I thought you like sharing the bed with me," Han jokingly says.
"That's the least of my worries," Jeongin says, then gives each of them a glare.
Han pops his head in the middle of them, "Then what's the problem?"
Jeongin gives each of them a glare, "It's you guys snoring. It's like a whole orchestra in there but all the instruments are tuba," he says with a shiver.
Han grabs the front of Jeongin's shirt in response, "My snore sounded nothing like tuba!"
"How do you know what your snores sound like?" Jeongin asks, giving him the side eyes.
"Last time I checked it's Beethoven's Symphony No. 9," Han answers without a beat.
Jeongin leans at him and gives him a perplexed look, "What?"
"What?" Han asks back with daring eyes.
"Beethoven's Symphony No. 9," Chan says, finding himself giggling to it and his giggles gradually turn into laughter that fills the small, enclosed space.
Chan slows down the speed and holds the steering wheel steady with his forearms to open his can of soda. The second it pops open, the carbonated drink fizzles and spills out of the can.
"Oh, no, man..." he groans in complaint, seeing the soda get all over the steering wheel and dripping onto his lap.
"You made a mess, Chris," Jeongin grumbles, pulling multiple tissues out of the box and then handing some to him. He helps to wipe the droplets that somehow land on the console.
With one hand steadily holding the steering wheel, Chan keeps on dabbing the wet patch on the jeans with a ball of tissues.
"Ugh, it's sticky," Chan groans in disgust and then looks down at his lap to see if he misses anything.
The moment Chan's eyes are off the road, the headlights shine on an object that comes into sight, and Jeongin, as the only one aware of the deer standing in the middle of the road, reflexively grabs the steering wheel and turns it hard to the right.
Losing control of the car, no one can do anything to stop it. The tires are screeching against the asphalt as the car spins around, and eventually stops as it hits something with a loud banging sound, but no one is moving.
-
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yourstardarling · 10 months ago
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Beauty Is Intimidating
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I was thinking about this earlier, that beauty creates a lot of mixed reactions in people. There is no one way to define beauty and what is deemed beautiful is personal interpretation. What I have noticed though is that oftentimes people who look good can easily intimidate other people. Their beauty creates a barrier that makes it hard sometimes for them to be approached. Like in popular Highschool movies for example, beautiful people are often seen as untouchable. They hold a lot more power than others and only other beautiful people can easily be around them.
The reason I brought this up is because it made me wonder about the nature of beauty. What better planet to look at than beauty herself, Venus. Venus the planet of love, femininity and beauty rules over the way we view attraction in our lives. However, the nature of Venus is to face scrutiny and conflict for her beauty. Her signs are opposing forces that don’t like Venuses beauty.
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Taurus & Scorpio: This first axis shows the point that beauty will often cause intimidation. People who are beautiful have a way of bringing up the shadows of other people. They are ideally secure within themselves and their appearance. This in turn creates an effect where they’ll face scrutiny for others insecurities. “I wish I had hair like hers” “Why aren’t my arms as muscular as his” This demonstrates how beauty, will bring about underlying feelings of others to light. It can garner jealousy and envy for your appearance. So the intimidation itself does not come from the attractive person, but from the insecurities others may have inside. It’s a feeling of unworthiness to even talk to someone they believe looks better than them. Oftentimes people make the assumption that a beautiful person won’t like to talk to them. Sometimes if these feelings are not evaluated, it can cause deep emotional resentment towards good looking people.
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Libra & Aries: This next axis shows us how beauty can often cause conflictions within other people. Beautiful people are susceptible to face hatred for their appearance. A lot of aggression can be thrown towards them just for the fact they look good. With the Aries influence on Libra, people will want to physically fight them. Some have faced bullying and harassment growing up which motivated them to improve their appearance. At the same time beautiful people can easily get other people to fight for them. Like Helen of Troy, a whole war was waged in her name because she was considered the most beautiful women in her time. So beauty here becomes a form of protection, which intimidates others from messing with you. However, the air sign nature of Libra shows how conflict will instead arise in the form of gossip. A lot of rumors can be made about them, which are usually lower Aries quality traits, such as being a b*tch, explosive, mean and narcissistic. For example, my friend has been told multiple times that other people thought she looked mean so they did not approach her. When in reality, she's a goofball and is far from being mean. Beauty here creates intimidation, by people either wanting to fight you or stay away in fear of being attacked by you.
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Pisces & Virgo: This axis is between Venus’s exaltation and fall placements. In Pisces, Venus love knows no bounds, they are able to find beauty in everything and everyone. Virgo though reminds us of what beauty means in our society. It signifies facing constant scrutiny. Instead of being loved for their whole being, beautiful people will often face a lot criticism on their looks. They will get shamed for any slight changes in their appearance such as their weight, face and complexion. Criticism on why they are wearing this outfit, why does their hair look like this and a need to bring them down for not being perfect. Pisces reminds us that this is a reflection of what you find imperfect within yourself. The beautiful person is just mirroring the insecurities in other people. That is why you can find something within them to always critique because it’s the criticism you have about yourself. The exaltation of Pisces teaches us to let go of trying to pay attention to every little detail about other’s appearance. Instead it's about appreciating the whole, which includes the fact that they are a regular person. There is so much more to them than just their physical looks. A reminder that before making all these assumptions about them, it is important to get to know who they are behind the mask.
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This is just my theory and observation on beauty. So next time people think you’re unapproachable and scary, just know it’s probably because you’re so sexy 😏. Lmfao, hope yall enjoyed.
- Your Star Darling
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slut4celebs · 3 months ago
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Two Superstars in a Room... They Might Kiss
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Reneé Rapp x Reader
Word Count: 1,087 words
Trigger Warnings: oblivious Reneé Rapp, but that's not much of a trigger.
Request/Synopsis: Combining this request: "can you do something like actress!reader x reneé" with this request: "Renee x reader where they’re friends and Renee is convinced reader is straight because reader never really makes a big deal out of her sexuality, so Renee keeps thinking her crush is unrequited even though reader keeps flirting with her" because I thought they fit well together.
Requests are: open.
Reneé was starting to believe that she was going insane. (Y/n), her longtime crush and best friend, had just invited her to a movie premier. She was starring in a movie alongside Timothée Chalamet, who happens to be her Sex Lives of College Girls co-star's younger brother. Reneé's problem wasn't with him or the premier, but it was the fact that (Y/n) asked her in the flirtiest way possible. First, she did it like some kind of promposal. She held up a sign asking her if she would like to be her date, then she kissed Reneé directly on the cheek. What was she supposed to do with that? Her cheeks had turned a deep shade of red at both, the way she asked and the kiss. She didn't know how to handle it, and it turned into a two hour conversation with Aliyah. Aliyah claimed (Y/n) was flirting, but Reneé kept denying the fact. (Y/n) had to be one hundred percent straight.
When the day came, the two met up, both already adorned in their dresses and their make-up professionally done. "Wow, Reneé…" (Y/n) said as she took in the way the girl in front of her looked. The way (Y/n)'s eyes travelled her body made her blush, again. The deep shade of red decorating her cheeks despite the heavy foundation and pink blush already put there. She shook away the thoughts that were circulating her head, reminding herself that (Y/n) was, in fact, straight. She probably had a thing for Timothée. A deep sigh threatened to leave her lips, but she instead thanked her and gave her a quick hug before they got in the vehicle that would be taking the, to the premier.
Upon arriving, it was a whirlwind of dating questions between (Y/n) and both Reneé and Timothée as reporters tried to figure out who (Y/n) was into. "You guys are very nosy, huh?" She asked with a playful raise of her brow, making the press knew she was joking and to be played off as coy. One wrong step with reporters and they will tell the world you are rude and you could be seen as someone who doesn't want to work with other. This problem has been especially big for women, take Chappell Roan at the VMA's, for example. "I'll tell you that someone does peak my interest. That's all you get tonight. Now, take some pictures of me and my beautiful date." She winked at the people before posing with Reneé. Reneé tried not to focus on the fact that (Y/n) confessed that someone peaked her interest. Especially when she was so sure it was Timothée or some other guy she probably met on set.
Reneé was starting to feel like she had enough, she didn't understand how (Y/n) could flirt with her so consistently while having a crush on someone else. Though, to be fair, this was something Reneé did, too. She has confessed on multiple occasions that she loves to flirt and to be flirted with. Could that be why (Y/n) is doing this? She felt like maybe she should tell her how she felt in order to create a boundary, but at the same time she was incredibly scared to lose her best friend. This would be so much easier if Reneé knew (Y/n)'s sexuality, but the girl never discussed it at all, never making a big deal of it. "Let's just say, I'm confident in my feelings." Was always (Y/n)'s answer, and it made Reneé feel like she could both fight and kiss (Y/n) for the very vague but emotionally mature answer.
As the two approached her castmates, which consisted of Timothée Chalamet, Rachel Sennott, and Lola Tung (the main cast), they all cheered at (Y/n)'s entrance before wrapping Reneé up in hugs quickly. "So, this is the girl who (Y/n) never shuts up about." Rachel grinned, winking over at (Y/n) who playfully flipped her off. Of course, Reneé had already met Timothée due to Pauline and Lola had already been friends with her (Reneé even sang 'One Less Lonely Girl to Lola before), so she needed no introduction there. She was still pretty excited to meet Rachel, though, due to her acting in Bottoms, which Reneé and (Y/n) swore would be a cult classic after watching it.
"Do not say I talk about her all the time. She doesn't need to know how in love with her I am." (Y/n) raised a brow towards Rachel. In a way, this confused Reneé as she recognized this look as when (Y/n) was like 'Oh my God, if you don't shut up.' Could that mean there was some truth in her comment. A weird fluttering filled Reneé's chest as (Y/n) took her hand and led her to her seats. It was a feeling synonymous to feeling hopeful. She gave (Y/n)'s hand a testing squeeze, only to earn a broad grin being sent her way from the girl in front of her. And things slowly began to click for Reneé. "Okay, so these are our seats… Should we get snacks?"
Reneé stared at their seats for a moment, taking in the barely inhabited theater. Everyone was still taking in the festivities outside with the pictures and interviews. "What if I wanted to kiss you? Right here, right now. I want to kiss you. Would you kiss me back?" Reneé questioned boldly. She was used to being bold in every situation, but this one was making her feel an extreme bundle of nerves build in the pit of her stomach. She would feel mortified if (Y/n) rejected her then and there in front of the couple of people there, whose attention she did pull.
(Y/n) was shocked at first, not caring about the few people in the room with her. Her heart was racing at Reneé's words as she bit her bottom lip to contain her grin, even just a bit. "I'd say to do it. That I want you to kiss me. That I was planning on doing it after the film because I was too nervous to do it before or the day I asked you to come here." (Y/n) admitted softly. At the end of her admission, her senses were taken by the blonde, who allowed their lips to crash in to each other's. She quickly kissed back, bringing Reneé in by the waist as the blonde held her cheeks. More people were pooling in and Reneé pulled away reluctantly.
"So, you were saying..? About the snacks?"
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drchucktingle · 1 year ago
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queer horror memory lane
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i know this screenshot above is just way of some algorithm but seeing these books together i am so honored youve allowed me to open my heart and trot out my art in this unique way. having two well received queer horror books (and third on way) is amazing given where i started my trot. thank you
easy to talk on 'death of unique art' these days but if you look at my story it is powerful example that buckaroos have a taste for challenging or untraditional figures in art. this is NOT to my credit, this is to YOUR credit. YOU have supported queer autistic art. i am so moved
i am already a pretty optimistic bud but still BLOWN AWAY by way my trot has been embraced over time. i recognize my perspective is 'strange' to many but to see the way this unique way was once treated with irony and now sincerity has bloomed in its place. it brings tears of joy
as i trot down my QUEER HORROR memory lane i am going to repost TRAILER for each book just because i have been basking in these memories and recalling the slow embrace of this timeline around me. thank you for allowing me this space i am so humbled and honored. LOVE IS REAL
STRAIGHT
When a strange tear in the cosmos appears within Earth’s annual path, the consequences are disastrous. For one night a year, the vast majority of humans now undergo a frightening mental change, transforming into hateful, rage-fueled zombies who will stop at nothing to satiate their desire for brutality.
While not much is understood about this horrific mass hysteria, the demographic it effects is very specific: cisgender straight people. 
A few years after the first of these tragic events, four friends from across the queer spectrum look for safety in solitude, hunkering down in a remote desert cabin for what is now known as Saturation Day. With a vaccine available for straight people to curb their violent episodes, some predict the worst is over. Others aren’t so sure.
As night falls, it becomes clear that survival isn’t guaranteed this Saturation Day.
GET STRAIGHT HERE
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CAMP DAMASCUS
From beloved internet icon Chuck Tingle, Camp Damascus is a searing and earnest horror debut about the demons the queer community faces in America, the price of keeping secrets, and finding the courage to burn it all down. Welcome to Neverton, Montana: home to a God-fearing community with a heart of gold. Nestled high up in the mountains is Camp Damascus, the self-proclaimed “most effective” gay conversion camp in the country. Here, a life free from sin awaits. But the secret behind that success is anything but holy. And they’ll scare you straight to hell.
GET CAMP DAMASCUS HERE
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BURY YOUR GAYS
Misha knows that chasing success in Hollywood can be hell.
But finally, after years of trying to make it, his big moment is here: an Oscar nomination. And the executives at the studio for his long-running streaming series know just the thing to kick his career to the next level: kill off the gay characters, "for the algorithm," in the upcoming season finale.
Misha refuses, but he soon realizes that he’s just put a target on his back. And what’s worse, monsters from his horror movie days are stalking him and his friends through the hills above Los Angeles.
Haunted by his past, Misha must risk his entire future―before the horrors from the silver screen find a way to bury him for good.
PREORDER BURY YOUR GAYS HERE
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i am blessed by your support, your love, and your kindness. cannot believe how lucky i am to trot with you in all in this way and i cant WAIT to see what the future of this timeline holds for us. thank you for proving love with me from the past to the future
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artist-issues · 1 year ago
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I Saw Wish
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And it was the worst animated Disney movie I’ve ever seen. I have to watch it again before I can get into the nitty gritty details. But I don’t need details to sum it up, because my dad actually said it perfectly as we left the theater:
“It was like someone who didn’t really understand Disney movies tried to make a Disney movie.”
Both the form (the technical arts of filmmaking) and the content (the morals, values, and themes of the movie) were totally horrible.
I don’t know who’s fault it was. Jeremy Spears was in the storyboard room and Mark Henn and Eric Goldberg did some 2D animation. But they must have gotten outvoted, or they must not care anymore.
Because holy cow. Here’s some stuff that’s just off the top of my head.
SPOILERS. Not that it matters, because nothing interesting happens in this movie.
The writing? Terrible. Ninety percent of it feels like the characters are filling time with quirky one-liners that are trying too hard to be appealing, then failing, then taking you out of the movie. The jokes aren’t funny. The characters just respond to each other in conversation to check a one-liner box. The other twenty percent is whole conversations repeating tell-don’t-show exposition that has already been covered, usually twice, in previous scenes. Like if in Tangled, every scene had included some variation of Rapunzel saying to friends and enemies alike, “I have to see the floating lights so I’m sneaking to the castle with this thief who wants a mysterious tiara I hid from him. Don’t tell my mother, she’s a bit overprotective!” Over. And over. And over.
The character motivations are way too broad. Asha? Her dream is just “that everybody around me gets to be happy.” That’s it, in a nutshell. No deeper exploration of that. Nobody asks, “why do you care so much?” Nobody tries to convince her she should look out for herself, and then she proves she was right all along. The King? We are told (not shown) that he doesn’t want anyone else’s dreams to be “destroyed.” But he in no believable way expresses that that motivation is still what’s driving him during the movie—what’s driving him is just a plain old lust for power, no nuance.
By the way, the whole premise of the movie? Undercooked. Half-baked concepts strung together with no definitive meaning. Therefore, it’s not believable. Example: The characters act like the wishes are beautiful—well, actually, no, this movie doesn’t know how to show, so there’s not a lot of meaningful acting—the characters just tell us that wishes are “the most beautiful part of someone,” and that’s why it’s worth going through this adventure to give their wishes back to them. But there’s no proof of that in the movie. In fact, it directly kicks it’s own legs out from under that idea, because it has every character who gives up their wish forget that part of themselves. Asha’s grandfather has forgotten his wish, but that doesn’t make him any less “beautiful.” She, and everyone, still treats him like he’s this wonderful old man who deserves the world, who everyone loves…but why is he so appealing? If he “gave up the most beautiful part of him?” The only character who is changed by their lack-of-wish is the Sleepy-analogue character…who is just sleepy, which is described as “boring.” But nobody else who’s given up their wish in the whole kingdom acts like that. It’s just him. Also, the King acts like it’s so important to protect the wishes from destruction. But what does destroying a wish look like? That actually happens to Asha’s mom. Her wish-bubble is broken, literally, and she just says she feels grief. But like. Why? She never remembered it in the first place; it had been missing from her life for years. Also, what the heck is a wish?! It seems to range from broad concepts like “inspire people” to “fly.” Just “fly,” like a bird. The desire to levitate off the ground is the most important, beautiful essence of one background character. Like, what?! But no character ever has the why behind their wish to make us care.
I could go on and on about that point. Like, think about Disney movies that wrote the book on how to make movies about characters with wishes. If Ariel were in Wish, her bubble would look like “dancing and learning and exploring on the Surface with someone who understands her.” But we believe that that is her real, genuine wish, and that it matters to her, because we are shown why being understood is so important to her. Because it’s missing from her life. There’s a scene where she explores a boat alone, and even her best friend doesn’t get excited about it with her. Her dad won’t listen to her point of view. Her siblings don’t ask her about her life even when they think she’s in love. She wants what she wants because of pieces of her life that we are shown.
We are never shown why Asha’s grandfather is obsessed with inspiring people, so we have no reason to believe it, or care whether he gets it or not. We can’t feel disappointed when his wish is said to “never come true,” like we did when Quasimodo was abused by the people he wished to join. We can’t feel elated when he finally “gets” his wish, like we did when Simba smiles on Pride Rock remembering the same way he used to as a cub and claims the crown with a roar. We don’t have anything to hang on to, nothing to relate to, nothing to grasp and feel with the characters. So we don’t feel, because they didn’t put the work in to help us feel. They just say, “the mom’s feeling grief. Feel grief.” And expect us to do the work ourselves. I have to stop harping on this point and move on.
But The main point of the movie is very broad because of that lazy premise, and it’s barely reinforced by any kind of appealing storytelling. If I had to guess, the point would be “Keep wishing for more even when it’s hard.” But the story they told to communicate that meaning was so unimpactful. Asha doesn’t have a dream of her own that’s such hard work to accomplish! (Neither does her grandfather; his wish is “to inspire people.” And at the end, we’re supposed to see him strumming a guitar and believe it’s inspiring? We were never shown how he worked hard to learn how to play the instrument. Or that he carved it with his own hands, or anything like that. So there’s no meaningful demonstration of working hard for it or achieving your wish even if it’s far out of reach.) And nobody except the king is trying to take wishes away from anyone, and he just does it literally, after they voluntarily give them to him, so there’s not even any impactful demonstration of “don’t let anyone tell you your wishes are dumb or unachievable, or stop you from reaching them.” Even when he takes them away, it’s just because they…could, someday, be used to threaten his kingdom in a vague, really unlikely way. There are so many things you could do with “keep wishing for more even when it’s hard.” For instance; you could say the main character has always been afraid to dream (wish for more), because maybe when she was a kid something wonderful almost happened but ended in tragedy, so she keeps her head down and doesn’t want much because if you don’t dream you’ll never be disappointed. She takes no risks, and has to learn that sometimes trying and failing is worth more than slogging through life all self-protective. I mean, the pieces were right there. She has this line about her dad, and how she wished he would get better but then he died. She has lines about how nobody should have to live with grief?? Then that’s never addressed again! It’s just a throwaway emotion-moment with no buildup or follow-through to tie it to and support that main theme.
The compositions of too many shots were so terrible. Characters got cut off in weird places. One shot has Asha dead center, with her grandfather on the left side of the table and her mother on the right, having a family dinner with a super exposition-heavy conversation that is meant to be emotionally charged. But despite everything else being perfectly centered, half of her mother’s body is chopped off. The movie’s shot like someone’s mom who doesn’t understand technology tried to take a video with her phone.
The charm of the art “style” wears off basically immediately. I know what they were going for. I see the sketch lines and watercolor textures. This is maybe the first time Disney ever failed to accomplish a visual “look” that turned out good. Everything looks dull. Muted. De-saturated. Slightly out of focus, but not in a cool Spider-Verse way. The sets or backgrounds are lazy; at no point does the scenery look complete; big, empty, boring spaces that do not create any kind of “stage” for impactful moments. The rendering looks unfinished. When Asha’s hair moves during her belting of the “I Make This Wish” song, it’s bad. It’s unnatural. It flops in a way that doesn’t make sense for the weight of her hair. The most impactful visual moments come from the villain, and they’re moments when he looks way too unhinged for the kind of line he’s saying.
There is no interesting character development. Asha goes from believing everyone is basically good and their wishes deserve the chance to come true , to….that, again. That would be fine, she could be a static character, if she proved contrast-characters wrong, in a believable way. But she never does. Because no other characters argue with her except the King. And it goes no deeper than “everyone’s wishes are basically good and they deserve the chance to make them true” vs. “nuh-uh, because I get to decide what makes them deserving.” The King doesn’t have any kind of interesting development, either. They don’t expand on his tragic backstory—it consists of one drawing of him near a broken boat, and a few images of the corner burned off of his family taoestry. They never say “King Magnifico wished for _____ and it was taken away!” They literally never tell you what his wish or dreams were, or what motivated him to create the whole kingdom that the movie’s premise sits on. So there’s no convincing sense of progression, how he got this way, why he’ll keep going “so far.”
The pacing is weird. It undercuts every moment that could have any kind of emotion behind it. One minute Valentino is suavely bouncing around, then he’s given a two-second beat to blubber with badly-animated tears that he’ll miss Star—then he instantly gets to have another funny one-liner so we forget he might’ve been sad a second ago. We’re clearly supposed to believe that the King and his wife are devoted to each other, and his turning evil was such a big betrayal, but there’s no time and no impactful evidence for us to believe either of those things. And even if we did, the moment he’s defeated and trapped in a mirror, and begs to be let free, the Queen kind of shrugs it off, makes a forgettable one-liner, and tells them to throw him in the dungeon. And he doesn’t look remorseful. And we don’t even get to assume he’s embarrassed or emotionally devastated that he’s come to this—because the last thing he says is “nooo, the dungeon is so smellyyy!” Like this is a half-baked LEGO short that can’t get emotionally deeper than what an actual 3 year-old’s parents might be okay with.
And that’s the worst offense: The movie is not genuine. It works hard for nothing, and it has no vulnerability. It just uses old Disney standbys to pretend to be vulnerable. Have the music swell and the characters gasp and the songs drip emotion when characters are meant to be saying or doing something emotional.
But truthfully, think of all the Disney movies you’ve ever seen with the hardest emotional moments. The sheer joy of Genie when he realizes he’s free. The anguish when Elsa thinks Anna’s been frozen forever, or when Anna thinks she’s dead. The trauma when Simba loses Mufasa. The longing and dreaming of Ariel when she reaches up out of her grotto. The sense of foreboding when Mother Gothel says “fine, now I’m the bad guy” or the heartbreak in Rapunzel’s eyes when she thinks Flynn has abandoned her, or the shame on Aladdin’s face when Jafar reveals he’s a street-rat, or the horror of cruelty when the stepsisters rip up Cinderella’s dress, or Kala’s tears when Tarzan leaves her in the treehouse, or Sarabi’s tears when Simba comes back, or Mulan’s father tossing aside the sword and token of the Emperor to embrace Mulan, or heck, even just Lilo pushing Stitch in the woods and telling him “get out of here.” This movie has no moments like that. It has moments you can tell that the filmmakers wanted to hit like that—but they don’t.
Because no work is put into building them up. You know how much Simba loves Mufasa, because you’ve been watching their chemistry more than any other character all the way up till he dies. You know how much Mulan wants to please her family because she spends all of Act I desperately attempting to do that. You know Quasimodo believes the world below is beautiful and wants them to accept him because he has interesting things like—talking to gargoyles, convincing us that he’s lonely; building a scale model of the townspeople, convincing us that he sees them in a beautiful way and wishes he were beautiful in more ways than one like them, too.
Right down to the facial expressions, none of them are as anguished, happy, sad, excited, silly, in any convincing way like all of Disney’s other movies. Asha’s “low moment” when she’s afraid her “wish” hurt everyone else (still vague on what that wish ever was) lasts two seconds, she’s not crying, she’s barely sitting with slumped shoulders, and her family barely spend two seconds comforting her. They basically just say, “aw, no, it’s not y fault, it’s the king’s.” And she’s like, “yeah okay” and that’s that. It’s like the animators we’re afraid to animate really intimate emotions on the characters’ faces. The voice actors, too.
And the whole movie is peppered with Easter eggs to past Disney movies. But all that does, if you really know Disney beyond the visuals, is make you think of how hollow this movie is in comparison. How much you wish you were watching Cinderella or The Little Mermaid or something with depth and vulnerability instead of Wish.
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maryland-officially · 3 months ago
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I have OCD.
Once I find something that brings be comfort and joy, I encase myself in it. Comfort, joy, must have. Must keep. This helps. This will help.
I get obsessive, easily. This applies to many things.
It's not just when something is of comfort or joy. It's even more so when something resolves some - especially the majority - of a negative emotion surrounding something. This can be fear, depression, a queasy, uncomfortable feeling.... many things.
For example, I 'have OCD about germs.' A fear of germs was instilled in me by my second grade teacher. It was the perfect environment for an obsession + compulsion to develop.
The teacher had always made sure that we wiped our desks with Clorox wipes after every assignment. Multiple times per day, maybe per hour - it was in elementary school, so I can't say per period.
We had to use hand sanitizer every time that we touched something, before and after getting a worksheet, everytime that we'd leave our desks for something, when starting a new activity - more often than we'd wipe our desks.
Often when we did this, she'd talk about the importance of 'staying away from germs', and how even though we're wiping desks, we're still in 'so much danger', seeing as there's still the '0.01% of germs', since they always say 99.9% of germs die. (Learning that this is a lie and it is less than 99.9% of germs killed was not fun.)
Being wary of germs became normal, it was okay. I understood it - I feared the germs, which, that's normal for a child! I wasn't really that scared. It was just an underlying thought.
But, the thing is, this very same teacher, didn't believe in washing hands. She believed it was a waste of time, and said that there would be hand sanitizer outside of the bathrooms waiting for us to use, and that it was unnecessary to wash our hands - it 'took too long'.
This was abnormal. It was strange. It didn't make sense. Germs are bad. Hand sanitizer doesn't kill all of them. Hand sanitizer is just a gel, it doesn't clean off your hands. It's just a gel. It's a coating, really. Wash your hands. It's better. It's cleaner. They aren't washing their hands. Wash your hands more. They need to be clean. Clean. Clean. No germs. They aren't clean enough. They feel unclean. They need to be clean. You're using the same sink as they did to rinse off their hands -- what if they don't use soap? Or not enough of it? Wash them. Different sink. Grab a towel, don't touch the handle. It's unclean. There are germs. So many people touch that. Don't touch it. It's dangerous. People die from that, you know. Don't.
Needless to say I did not follow that rule - uhm, I in fact did washed my hands. This is an obsession. I obsessed over my hands being clean. ...I still do. I still don't trust tables, I still feel uncomfortable touching sink handles, I still wash my hands every time I get anywhere near a sink because just in case.
The compulsion, of course, was watching them.
The thing is, haha, this didn't help me. OCD isn't just this.
OCD makes you obsess so much it's harmful. My skin cracks because of it. My dermatologist said that I needed to use lotion after every time I washed my hands to re-hydrate them, because all the hand sanitizer - that I had started to bring with me, and use so much more often - and hand washing had dried them out so much.
...Sometimes I obsess over things that aren't like this. Things that bring me comfort.
Movies. TV shows. Grades. Friends.
It's like a hyperfixation or special interest, kind of. But less talked about, I guess.
When I say I obsess over my friends I mean that literally, by the way. If I seem like I'm distancing myself it's because I am. I get scared that I'll obsess.
It happens. It's not like, a yandere thing. It's not a 'crush'. It's more like when I get too close to a friend and they are too much of a comfort for me, my brain goes haywire and thinks 'comfort needed. happy needed. if person = comfort, then must surround myself with person.' I think my brain thinks it'll bring me more joy.
It doesn't.
It gets to a point where I value one person over my own life, I've had moments where I've ignored everything except for a person.
...but that's more extreme cases. please don't be worried, I'm in therapy now. I don't know. I'm sorry. I just feel like I have to say this.
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tanadrin · 3 days ago
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I am sorry for the anon but I feel too vulnerable to come off due to the nature of my question.
I am slowly losing friends due to my refusal to engage in negative/nihilistic/doomer views of the future. My friends are 1000% convinced Trump and Republicans are going to crash the economy on purpose, leading to a depression, and carry out a Gilead situation. I told one of my friends the other day how, despite everything and the political situation, I am trying to be as positive as possible - or at least neutral. Her response to me was, "Why? I don't understand your optimism. You know they're going to enslave us all like in The Handmaid's Tale, right?" and it has become so dreadful now to interact with them. Anytime I disagree, they try to intellectually dominate me or put me under them in a way where I have no choice but to just leave the conversation.
I know this was a lot. But is there any advice you might have for someone like me? Because I sometimes feel like I am being painted as crazy. I know things will be hard but they genuinely want me to believe I have no future and I can't stand that.
Also, would it be too much to ask if you maybe mind sharing some of the other people/blogs you follow?
I once heard advice on dealing with Qanon family members who had fallen down the rabbit hole and only ever wanted to talk about conspiracy theories or the outrage bait they'd seen on Fox News or OANN or whatever, about not challenging them on their views but basically saying "I don't want to talk about this; let's talk about our plans for the weekend, or what movie we wanna go see later, or what interesting books you've read lately." The idea being, arguing with someone can only further entrench their beliefs, and if you really want to shake someone out of their dismal universe of conspiracism, it helps to remind them of all the things that aren't the fear-and-anger-activating content they're stuffing their brains with for hours every day.
Maybe something like this could help? I have a hard time imagining that someone really believes The Handmaid's Tale really is just around the corner--if you really believed that, surely you would be trying to flee to Canada or doing some political volunteer work or something--and sometimes doomer stuff can be kind of reflexive or phatic, like making a crack about how your retirement plan is to die in the water wars or something. But even if it isn't, I don't think there's any point in trying to argue about this stuff in the moment. Instead try to build on the things you still find fulfilling in that friendship, the conversations and interests and activities with those friends that caused you to become friends in the first place.
If you can't do that--if hanging out with them is always a constant grind of full-throttle doomerism, and they express no interest in actually trying to do something with their feelings of anger and frustration--you are perfectly within your rights to spend less time around them. You could, if you wanted to and you felt that you owed them at least that, give them a heads up as to why. If a close friend of mine or a family member was doing this, I would certainly talk to them about it. But your obligation to subject yourself to someone else's self-destructive idee fixe is not bottomless. Even with a partner you are within your rights to eventually say "I'm not going to talk about this with you anymore."
(And that's not only true of politics or conspiracy theories, by the way! If you have a close friend or family member or partner who--for example--has severe depression but refuses to seek treatment for it, you are not obligated to be the sponge for their misery forever every time they need someone to talk to. If someone in your life is in a relationship or a job that is making them miserable, and won't do anything to leave that relationship or find a new job, and just wants a friend to complain to, you are within your rights to eventually shut that down. Lots of people fall into a holding pattern in their life where they are unhappy but unable to do anything about it, and they will make this their friends' or loved ones' problem. That doesn't make them bad people: lord knows I have found myself doing this before. It's a very human thing to do. But sometimes the Good Friend Thing is to say "I love you, and will support you if you want to actually *do something* about your situation, but otherwise, oh my god shut the fuck up." But, you know, nicely.)
But if your friends want to make themselves miserable because hanging on to an endless stream of toxicity and doomerism from social media (and I will bet this is primarily coming from social media) is more important to them than your friendship, and they can't handle you not agreeing with them, you may lose them as friends. If you do, I'm sorry. That sucks. It's hard to lose friends, and it's even harder later in life when making new friends is more difficult, and I don't want to pretend like that's not a big deal.
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sugary-strawberry-shortcake · 8 months ago
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Nightmares
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anon: felt like hurting myself with this instead of practising for my math exam.....
JJK Spoiler Warning!!
You always had very abnormal and detailed dreams.
One example was the one Satoru woke you up from.
“Y/N, open your eyes.”
You startled awake and stared with wide, teary eyes at your lover. He had already engulfed you in his arms, worry evident on his face. Whenever he saw you in distress, he felt it even more intensely. “What’s wrong?”
“I just—” you swallowed again, “I had a dream.” His fingers continued stroking your hair, encouraging you to continue. “You fought against Sukuna and died. Then, instead of being buried, your body was taken by Yuta. He risked his life by taking over your body and fighting Sukuna with your power.”
Some seconds passed.
Satoru’s hearty laughter filled the room, and you pulled away, offended by his audacity to laugh at your fear.
“Babe,” he said, seeing your expression and stopping his laughter, though a slight smirk remained. “You have the wildest fantasies, even in your unconsciousness. Seriously, no one could make something like this up. It’s too bizarre even for sci-fi movie makers. Saying that, maybe you should become a wri—”
He was interrupted by a pillow being slammed into his face.
Luckily for you, he didn’t have his infinity on.
“Stop making fun of my fears.” You crossed your arms and leaned back from his touch.
Satoru pouted, alarmed at your reaction. He took your face in his hands, caressing it gently. “Mochi, I’m not. Believe me, I’m just kidding, but I do think you have a cool mind. You should be proud of it.”
Damn him. He knew how to sweet-talk you. Your still-concerned eyes looked up at him. The dream felt too real not to be scary.
“You promise you won’t die and let your body be misused by other people?”
“I promise.”
He couldn’t hide a smirk. “You know you’re dating the strongest. There’s no one I would lose to in a battle.” A kiss followed on your forehead.
“I could never leave you alone.”
_______
It feels like you were trapped in a nightmare, perhaps one orchestrated by Satoru himself.
Seeing your boyfriend dead and split in half on the table just moments ago was horrifying. But seeing his body now, standing in full glory and ready to fight against Sukuna, was even worse. This wasn’t the man you loved; it was Yuta, the small boy your lover adored. You felt betrayed not only by Satoru for breaking his promise but also by everyone else—your friends and his friends.
The only one who could slightly relate to your emotional state was Yuji. Neither of you were aware of the plan when it was made, nor were you able to stop it from happening.
To preserve the honor of Gojo Satoru and the love you felt for him, you desperately wished he would wake you from this nightmare and embrace you again.
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totheblood · 2 years ago
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i keep thinking about infatuated ellie.. like LOVESTRUCK, nervous, giddy ellie, and ik you’ll do her so much justice
a/n: ik this is from weeks ago but i'm writing some headcanons and would appreciate if u guys could send some more! i also need to note the ai audio i made of joel was inspired by my talented friend saz who had the idea to make a joel ai and have him and ellie interact, her fics are amazing and i believe she will be making her own ellie fic w a joel audio so pls folllow her and read her work! her @ is @dyk3ification also i wrote this in whole foods before my class so if it sucks... thats why.. ai audios at the end! also pls interact w me and my work it makes me so happy ily bye!
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lovestruck!ellie headcanons
ellie is 100%, certifiably, and downright a hardcore lover to her core
when she’s crushing on you she is the type to take anything you do as a sign that you like her back
she’d be like “no, dina, but when she held the door she looked back at me and smiled… who does that?”
“polite people?”
or if you’re sitting next to her in class and she drops her pen, the minute you reach down to pick it up for her she’s imagining your future together
she would just secretly pine after you for as long as she can, way too nervous to work up the courage to ask you out
she’s the type to journal about you, draw you, think that it was weird, and rip it out of her journal
but she’s too sentimental to throw it away so she’d just tuck it into a box in the back of her closet
she’s so observant about the things you do
just by sitting next to you, she knows your favorite movie, your favorite place to eat, and your favorite flowers
(she writes all of this down in case she one day works up the courage to ask you out)
when you do finally start talking she would go out of her way to go to the things you invite her too
for example, you invited her to a GSA mixer (something she wouldn’t attend on her own) at a time when she was working
she called out sick just to attend and talk to you for a total of fifteen minutes
it’s totally worth it to her cause you hugged her twice (she counted)
she does insanely stupid shit like going out of her way to get you your favorite coffee from this very specific place half an hour from campus.
“oh, ellie you didn’t have to do this. thank you so much! let me pay you back.” you’re reaching into your bag looking for your wallet
“oh, it’s no big deal i was in the area,” she was nowhere close to the area. “and it didn’t cost that much,” it was an 8-dollar cup of coffee. “maybe we could go together sometime?”
ellie doesn’t even realize she’s asked you out by the time you’re agreeing with a huge smile plastered on your face
the date goes well, so you ask her on another and another… and another
before she knows it you’re her girlfriend and she can’t shut up about it
she’ll try to manipulate conversations just so she can say the phrase “my girlfriend”
she’s at the movies with jesse and dina and with every preview of a horror movie shes like, “oh, i think my girlfriend would love this movie.”
the barista at the coffee shop makes her latte too sweet and she’s all like, “i wish my girlfriend was here so i could give her this.”
she’s also the type to call you and find out where you are just so she could deliver you her very sweet latte that she knows you would enjoy
she’s also the type to brag about any accomplishments of yours to everyone
“oh yea, my girlfriend won some academic award. she’s such a genius.”
she’s the type to whenever you’re together she would just be staring at you and you’re like, “what?���
“nothing… you’re just so pretty. i’m so lucky.”
there’s not a day that goes by that she doesn’t make you feel like you put the moon and the stars in the sky
all of her weekly calls with joel have become her ranting about how much she loves you
“ellie, all you do is talk about this girl. when am i going to get the chance to meet her?”
“soon, i hope. i think you will really like her. she’s fuckin perfect, joel, i swear.”
“so i’ve heard.”
ai audios:
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famemonsterrr · 2 years ago
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Astrology observations part 5. 🪽
- Aquarius placements make someone soo smart ass and witty. Especially mercury 🤌🏻
- Gemini and Sagittarius are the type of people who will be killed by curiosity.
- 11th house placements make someone really popular and well known even if they don’t hang out with everyone. Same goes with the 3rd house placements maybe because of your siblings
- Pisces sun with Capricorn Venus is the most random and sad placement in a natal chart.
- Gemini sun with cancer placements are softies and more sensitive than all gemini placements
Men with all gemini in the personal planets is a red flag. Immature and easily influenced
- people with 4th house Venus will want their home to be comfortable and keep memories from their family house. You will see a lot of childhood pics on the walls or maybe a lot of photo albums.
- i love how passive aggressive a cancer can be. Like they are soooo unserious in serious situations. They will piss you off.
- it might be unpopular but the sister sign is a big fat lie. I have seen couples and friends with the sister signs not lasting long. For example every friendship I have a Virgo was good of 1 year and then became toxic.
- Pisces with 8th house placements or Scorpio placements is the person that will have temporary obsessions. Maybe they will find a song and play it for months and then will find a new song and then again. Maybe it would be a crush,maybe a movie character.
- Gemini and Sagittarius placements love cultures and they know a lot of things about them.(My mom is Gemini sun with Sagittarius moon and when I was young she showed me a lot of cultures. One random day she mention how much interesting Bollywood is and bought some dvds and we watched them together. Also had a lot of Arabic cds and we love to listen together and thanks to her my love for cultures became huge)
- i love LEO a lot but having it in your moon is pain in the ass. DRAMA QUEEN but I applause you for being open and expressive with what u feeling. Vulnerable queen💅🏻 but high maintenance moon. Constant admiration and attention.
- Pisces moon/rising people have dead inside eyes as for the other placements I can’t see it. (I’m Pisces sun and Venus and I don’t have this type of eyes)
- air moons scare me. You don’t know how they feel and what they feel. They are just there breathing and existing and inside their head their tiny version maybe burning the whole place💀 (SpongeBob brain scene if u know u know what I’m saying)
- I kinda feel bad for all my Scorpio moon people. Are you okay? ☹️
- Aquarius and Pisces will say things to get a reaction out of everyone. I have seen myself doing that just because I want to annoy them. I don’t believe half of the things I’m saying but I will do it to get a reaction for fun. Also 7th house placements do that.
- earth suns with Sagittarius placements make them super fun and cool. (My bestie is Capricorn with Sagittarius moon and she is so fun and witty)
- have you seen a Pisces sticking into anything? No me neither these bitches changing everything when they getting bored. It’s a mutable thingy ✨
- libra mercury is the devils advocate. ALWAYS
- never date someone who has the same mars sign as ur moon. Unless u want PAIN💅🏻
- always date someone who has the same Venus as ur sun. They will see you as their ideal type vice versa.
- Virgo women love cleaning and organising and Capricorn men love cleaning and organising. Match in heaven? 😏
- just to know the biggest liars are libra and Leo not Gemini.
- Pisces aren’t competitive at all they even let you win. They just don’t care (that’s me unless I’m playing uno) also really unpopular but Aries aren’t that competitive.
- Aquarius love internet friendships because they can have their space and not meet all the time with people.
- Taurus are more obsessive than a Scorpio. (I had a dude who said to me that he was stalking his ex for 3 years straight. It’s the dedication for me💀)
Speaking of these two. THEY ALWAYS BELONG TOGETHER. both insane and obsessed over each other in relationship. Maybe not the best of friends but everything is possible
- I haven’t see Gemini and Pisces be able to concentrate for more than 10 min.
- this is a personal thing to say but as a Pisces I tend to connect people with colours,smells ect. (One of my besties is white and always imagine her as cotton candy.) also I tend to bring in any conversation my closest people. I just love to mention them anywhere I can. If any Pisces reads this please tell I ain’t the one.
- libra sun with Virgo placements is a person with perfectionism and anxiety.
- fixed dominated individuals are like Patrick’s house. Like big rocks 💀
- cardinal dominated individuals need to learn manange their hidden anger issues
- mutable dominated individuals need to learn to end things they started 😒
Thats all 🪽
Okay guys this one was loooong. Sometimes I have a lot of ideas in my head and I get stimulated so thank u for making it till the end. Appreciate it sooo much 🥰 stay healthy and hydrated 💅🏻
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juyeonszn · 1 year ago
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JUST FOR ME
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PAIRING ji changmin x f!reader
WORD COUNT 1.26k
GENRES kinda fluff ﹒smut
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, apparently ji changmin has a secret, established relationship, a whisker away ref <3, dacryphilia lol, making out, oral (m!receiving), face fucking lol, cum eating lol, lmk if i missed anything!
SUMMARY ji changmin had a secret.
MORE hellaur hellaur!! i cannot believe i’ve written 8 of these in the past month like i’m actually sick in the head. but maybe u guys are even sicker for reading them idk… once fawntober is over i think i might spontaneously combust. ANYWAY i would like to dedicate this to the resident jichang lover <3 beam <3 consider this a late birthday gift <3 if u enjoyed pls rb!
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri
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Ji Changmin had a secret.
A very big secret that he would never dare tell to anyone else. Not his friends. Not even you. Whether it was because he wanted to keep this to himself, take it to the grave type beat, or because he was embarrassed— the world may never know.
But as you cuddle into his side, sniffling over this stupid animated movie, he realizes that his big secret might be harder to keep to himself than he thought.
He’s seen A Whisker Away with you probably hundreds of times by now, and he’s seen you cry each and every time, but for some reason this is the one that gets to him. The sight of your pretty tears trickling down your cheeks, eyes slightly puffy and lips pouty, has his thinking clouded. Typical Y/N behavior, living in his mind rent free like it was your career.
He hopes the thick comforter of your bed hides just how turned on he is, licking his lips when a tear drips down your chin and onto your chest. Don’t even get him started on your pajama choice. Nothing but a thin camisole and flimsy linen shorts. Did you know that you were just one action away from sending him into cardiac arrest?
Changmin doesn’t even notice that the movie has ended and the credits are displayed, eyes still trained on the stray teardrops rolling down your sternum. It’s not until you’re reaching above your head to stretch, leg bumping into his hard on.
You turn to him with wide eyes and a gasp. “Changmin! No way you’re fucking horny right now.”
“I’m not?” His response comes out more like a question than a statement, so of course you don’t believe him in the slightest. You give him a pointed look.
“How could you possibly be hard after watching that?” Your eyebrows raise, judging him wholeheartedly without knowing the full story. Though, he’s almost certain you’d still judge him then, too. Who wouldn’t? Getting turned on by the sight of his girlfriend crying wasn’t exactly something that people would think is normal.
“That’s— uh— that’s not what— you know what, never mind. We can just go to sleep if you’re tired—” Changmin really wished you weren’t so persistent sometimes. Then again, your persistence was the reason you were together in the first place.
“No, I’m wide awake now,” you simper, a sly little smile that looks out of place paired with the tear streaks on your cheeks. “Lemme help you, Min.”
You peel back the covers, straddling his lap. Changmin groans, throwing his head back when your barely clothed warmth presses down on his erection. Your fingers card through his hair before you lean in to kiss him.
It’s slow at first, lips moving together gently as you work yourself up. One of the things Changmin loved about you was the fact that you were always so eager to please. He had a tendency of not asking for anything unless absolutely necessary, but with your keen sense of perception, you just knew when he needed a little extra care. Like right now, for example.
His hands find your hips, grinding them into his own as he nips your bottom lip. You sigh into the kiss, parting just enough to catch your breath. He slips his fingers under the waistband of your shorts but you shake your head.
“Mm-mm,” you start to pepper kisses all over his face and jaw, trailing down his neck. “Let me do the work. You just relax, okay?”
The service top he was, Changmin thought it would be a bit difficult to just let you have the reins. However, he pulls away his hands anyway, allowing you to exhibit your magic. You smile contentedly, shimmying down so your face was level with his crotch.
Changmin watches with bated breath as you haul his sweatpants and underwear down his legs in one go. He fists your hair in a makeshift ponytail, darting out his tongue to wet his lips when you leave a sweet kiss to the tip of his cock. He hisses as you wrap your hands around the base, pumping his length agonizingly slow.
His hips buck up into your hands, teeth gritted when your lips envelope the head. Your tongue drags over his slit, collecting the precum that’s begun to form. You moan when the taste of him settles, one hand sliding under his t-shirt to claw at his abdomen.
Finally, after what felt like eternity, you take him fully into the warm coziness of your mouth. Every time you gave Changmin head, you tried not to push yourself to swallow him wholly. You were afraid of embarrassing yourself by not being able to fit his impressive size down your throat. This time was different. You felt the need to provide him the best pleasure possible.
He thinks he might combust, focus zeroed in on your plush lips going further down his length and meeting your hand. Your eyes flutter open, making contact with his as you twist your wrist and start to bob your head. Changmin groans, using his free hand to fist at the sheets below you. You looked so fucking filthy like this, ass perked up in the air as you sucked him off like your life depended on it. But good God, you managed to still look absolutely gorgeous, even with the drool dribbling along your chin.
Instinctively, his grip on your hair tightens and he pushes your head down, forcing you to engulf his cock more than you already had. You gag, but steel yourself to power through. Changmin accepts his fate and lets himself loosen up, a conniving grin spreading across his lips.
“Gonna let me fuck your face, baby?” He coos, bending his knees and putting his feet flat on the bed.
You moan in approval, pulling off just to respond. “Mhm. Want you to feel good.”
“Fuck, you’re so sexy,” he bites his lip, bringing your face closer to kiss your swollen lips, your hand still jerking him off. “I’m gonna ruin you.”
He can taste himself on your mouth and it makes his release that much more exciting. You break apart, returning to what you were doing previously. This time, however, Changmin doesn’t hold himself back. He starts to fuck up into the wet heat of your mouth, cock sliding down your throat with a choked groan following each thrust.
Your eyes water, and before you know it, tears are tracking on your cheeks. He nearly whines, all sense of restraint lost completely as you continue to wrap around him, tongue swirling around the tip and running along each vein. Changmin feels insane, his orgasm building up higher and higher the more you take him— the more you cry for him.
It’s when one of your teardrops drips onto his stomach, your thumb swiping across his hip bone, that he cums into your mouth with a moan so out of character, you almost join him. You try to swallow everything he gives you, but it’s so much that you have to pull off of him, feeling it slip down the side of your mouth. Your hips roll into the bed to release some of the friction that formed.
Changmin wipes away the mixture of saliva and cum on your chin, stamping another slow kiss to your lips. You straddle him once again, whimpering when he presses up into your already sensitive cunt.
He smiles, fingers dipping into your shorts. “You did so well, baby. Let me return the favor.”
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© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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the-kirby-movie · 5 months ago
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ATTENTION KIRBY FANS!
Do you want to see a Kirby movie more than anything, but Nintendo keeps letting you down? Well, today's your lucky day! I'm in the process of creating my very own, fanmade Kirby movie based off of Star Allies - and I'd like your help. I believe that with the efforts of a community coming together to work on this passion project and give something that we love our all, it will turn out better than anything official that they could come out with. Overall, while this project is serious to me and something that I am very dedicated to, I also want it to be fun and for everybody to have a good time creating this art together. If you do decide to jump on and help, there's no need to worry about deadlines or stress or needing to have a ton of skill. But, without further ado....
Animators
I'm looking for people that have experience working in Blender here. Pretty much any skill level is okay, though I will still request that you show me some sort of example (just to verify that you know how the application works at all, basically). Ideally I'd like to have enough people working on this that I could step back from leading the animation, eventually, and focus fully on writing/storyboarding and other design aspects instead - but I understand that this might be unrealistic.
Storyboarding
The more the merrier! Regardless of the level of your art skill or your style, if you can sketch out scenes in a way that's decipherable to others, you're more than welcome here.
Voice Acting
The big one. Voice actors for Kirby, Meta Knight, King Dedede, and Bandana Waddle Dee would be very much appreciated. I also have a longer list of characters that need voices that includes many of the Dream Friends, Hyness, the Mage Sisters, and more. This is the one thing I will likely be a little picky on, and require you to audition for the role.
Writers
Honestly, I'm not looking for many other writers right now. I think I have it mostly under control, but I could possibly take one or two co-writers on with me.
Sound Effects/Miscellaneous
Do you think you have something to bring to the table that I didn't list before? Great, this is for you! Let me know what you want to do, and honestly, I doubt I'll have any reason to turn you away. Whether it's stitching music and effects together, editing extra graphics, or literally whatever you think will be helpful, tell me so that I can get you in.
Community
If none of that sounds like something you'd be interested in, well, you can still do something to help. Just stick around here! Throughout development I'll be posting updates, questions, and polls about decisions on this blog for you to influence. I want this to be something that the community creates together and can enjoy together. By us, for us, you know? And everyone who wants to deserves to be involved.
- Closing -
If you made it this far, thanks for reading! This blog will likely be changing a lot in the upcoming days as I update and personalize it to be more effective. I also now have a discord server! Anyways, though, the long and short of it is that I'd love to work on this with other people but I will complete it, no matter what. So this is your official guarantee - sometime, in the indiscriminate future, you will have a Kirby movie. And I hope you enjoy it just as much as I'll enjoy making it, because honestly, this is just my dream. I hope I see you around, and have a great day!
progress as of 8/15/24: trailer scripted and (mostly) storyboarded. possibly starting animation soon!
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angelpink610 · 6 months ago
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You guys wanna know when the things I wished for, hoped for, visualized and manifested actually started to appear to me, to become my reality? When I understood and learned how to ENJOY THE PROCESS!
Let’s yap a bit… ;)
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Us as immediate people in an immediate society end up focusing entirely on the results, we only see the things we wish for as results, as finish lines. What we fail to do is see the start line and the path that leads to the end.
I don’t want to sound corny, but it’s really all about that Hannah Montana movie song “The Climb”. We only think about how fast we will get there, how life will be when we get there, how happy it will be when we get there. Well, here’s the thing: if you’re not happy and grateful throughout the way, don’t even expect to be happy on the finish line. Our goals are not essentially what make us happy, they’re proofs of our capacity and work. What actually makes someone’s life happy and amazing, is the way that person behaves and conditions their mind WHILE chasing all of these dreams. It’s all about your methods, it’s all about your feelings, your reactions to the world, the way you act towards people. Don’t think you’ll be happy and achieve the greatest things when you live your life and answer to the world bitterly, in a rush, not paying much mind to it.
I know this is obvious, but just so that no one is confused and comes for me after: I’m not saying every day is going to be incredible, I’m not saying that you’re not allowed to be sad, angry, uncomfortable, jealous, disgusted. These are all perfectly normal and human emotions, and everyone should feel them—it just shows you’re alive. This concept of being 24/7 happy and grateful and “Oh my God, everything’s incredible all the time” it’s just not sustainable nor healthy (+, obviously, not real). What we should do, instead, is allow these emotions to be felt, and then act upon them understanding why they’re there and how we can soothe them, or make them a little less strong. For example, understand where your anger comes from, is it truly someone’s fault, why are we feeling it. Not block it, not try to stop it from being felt—but understand it. And then, after thinking (even meditating, if you like) about it, let it go, and let it be felt still, if you think it’s the right thing. Don’t ask too much of yourself always, sometimes we really just need to scream for a second on our pillow or shed a tear in our room. It’s perfectly alright and also healthy!
Have fun, make friends, create good memories with these friends, study, live your life to the fullest. Meet new people, go to new places, discover new music, books, art, movies that make you feel something. Laugh with people you love, create memories through pictures, do some risky things, you don’t need to always be so careful about everything. Some lesions make us stronger. And while you’re doing everything else, manifest your dreams, work towards it, put in the effort, visualize, believe you’re worth and destined for that, acknowledge you already have everything you need to get there and that, actually, you are already there.
Learn to actually live your life on the way to your dreams, not just survive the path. When you look at life with gratitude and love, life looks back—and you’ll feel it.
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As always, you’re free to agree or disagree with me on the various topics I talk about. It’s my own experience and the way it’s been for me. Feel free to also share your stories on comments and/or reblogs! I’ll love to see it.
That’s it for today’s yapping session. Love, Seiko ♡
♡ borders credit: @anitalenia
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