#so when they called me. i didnt pick up
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
The total number of visits Tumblr.com received during January 2021 is 327 million.
Text
long ass rant in tags. abt to explode
#need to get this off my chest#ok so i straight up lied to my mum. shes been trying to get me a job out of stocking shelves#and i just. cannot find the motivation to do anything. i dont know what i want to do other than rot away#and im also so fucking scared of everything#so she made me apply for an office job that was mostly data entry and writing/editing#which is fine. easy. but i cant think of anything worse than having to sit on my ass doing boring shit for 8 hours#so when they called me. i didnt pick up#i didnt reply to their message. and my mum has been asking about it for the past 2 weeks cus she was convinced that HAD to call me#that i was a perfect candidate. and i was. but i didnt tell her they called me#i just lied and said they didnt. but she emailed them and they..well they told her the truth#and now shes really pissed at me. but hear me out. she forced me to apply. i didnt fucking want to#and ive already said no to so many jobs that i feel terribly guilty abt it so i just went along with it#lying is so easy yknow?#but i guess lying isnt great when they find out#i feel like shit. shes not even acknowledging me and i hate when shes pissed off at me and i know she should be#but cmon. i didnt want the damn job. why cant i just die honestly#ed stfu challenge#vent
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago
#I DIDNT KNOW I DIDNT KNOWWWWW#when i say damn thats crazy its bc i DO think its crazy i think a lot of things are crazy. like how birds have cloacas#or the way ppl draw a five pointed star in different ways and everyone assumes their way of doing it is how everyone does it#my brother is not letting me live this down btw he literally shouted at me like HOW DID YOU LIVE THIS LONG AND NOT PICK UP ON THAT#IDK!!! IDK I THOUGHT SOMETIMES IT COULD BE USED TO EXPRESS GENUINE SHOCK??????#he says its my delivery that makes it sound insincere bc i say it in a monotonous voice which when i think abt it YEAH....#THAT DOES MAKE IT LOOK KINDA BAD IN HINDSIGHT.....#and then i told him i keep a list of phrases that tickle my brain so i can remember to use them in conversation and apparently#most ppl dont do that bc he was like ???? stop doing that??? just let the conversation flow naturally it sounds fake>????#idk man i feel like if i did that and blurted out 'i forgot people find stuff like underwear arousing for some reason' instead of#smth like 'i wonder what kind of ppl find this kind of stuff the bees knees' like i normally do. it would. not go so well.#ALSO THE FLOW CHARTS ARENT NORMAL? i make flow charts before i call the bank or smth so i know what to say#its not just to blend in its also so i dont waste ppls time going uhhhhh as i think of how i put smth into words#its called stalling for time and i dont care if i have to say smth like thats just how the cookie crumbles if it gives me#5 more seconds to process whatever the fuck someone said without letting them think im not paying attention#doodles#diary#sona#puppysona#comics
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Pls someone talk to me about the quiet codependence Rust and Marty have, the too-easy domesticity they can fall into. Their constant arguing and moral disagreement that blends so easily into sharing clothes and a bottle and a home. The open hostility that silently becomes worry when no one else is watching. The implicit, unyielding trust that's never questioned and always counted on, between two people born and living in a world that's punished trust from the beginning.
#the song that plays in the background of all of this? one called 'are you alright' with a slow guitar and melancholy. wtf.#theyre playing td on tv rn and i caught it right in ep 4 where the DOMESTICITY is HIGH and like. why dont I remember any of this happening#true detective#rust x marty#'men and women. it's not suppose to work unless it's to make kids' rustin what the fuck. he says this to maggie's face.#while her husband is LIVING WITH HIM. there are so many... tones i didnt pick up when watching this before#rust cohle#marty hart#martin hart#rustin cohle#they know each other better than they know themselves and that makes me sick
350 notes
·
View notes
Text
ohhh my friend came over and we somehow ended up watching the entirety of tpn season one and ray still makes me so fucking sick. im goig to tear apart steel beams with my teeth
#skye's ramblings#THOUGH IM ALSO JUMPING AROUND SOO FAST BC SHE LIKED IT. shes like my only irl friend shes known abt my illness since the start#i take my ray plushie when i sleep over at her house she calls him my little guy. i genuinely didnt think it'd interest her much#we were literally just bored and she randomly picked up v1. 2 pages in she was like 'oh this is really addicting can i borrow this'#FELT AUTUSM KICK INTO MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE. said we could watch the anime n after ep1 she was like oh this is really good#cant describe how much i am jumping off tge walls in my mind. shes never been able to get into anime till now. i think i just won at autism#of course w the excitement comes escape arc ray once again hitting my brain with hammers god i love him so fucking much guys. i'm nauseous#it'll be 3 years since my first watch soon btw i wonder if ray emotions will ever stop making me physically ill. ifuckng love yuou raaay...
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
one of my only surviving memories of one of the churches my parents tried when i was a teenager, the pastor spent like half the sermon ranting and raving and yelling about the blasphemic lady gaga and how she had recently sang "god bless the u.s.GAY" during her performance of the national anthem at like the superbowl or whatever and they unfurled a gay flag instead of an american flag or something and about how it was SO DISRESPECTFUL to GOD and our TROOPS and that gay people should be ASHAMED for this and how lady gaga must be the devil's attempt to influence OUR INNOCENT CHILDREN into doing EVIL. like turning them gay i guess. or something
#i then proceeded to instinctively tune out every thing else about that church so this is really the only one thing i remember about it#i dont think wr went there too long thankfully maybe like a month or two at most#i dont even remember what that church's particular stance on Gay even was . tbh#i was literally so incensed my brain decided to focus entirely on the lady gaga thing because i was just like#'yeah i do not need to be hearing whatever words this guy is about to start saying about gay people'#my parents felt like 'love the sinner not the sin' types when i was growing up so i always wonder what they thought about that sermon#because we really didnt go there anymore pretty soon after that. but also like i said my parents were also actively churchhopping#i always assumed growing up my parents probably just agreed 100% with whatever a pastor says (because thats how they were at#our family church before the pastor they liked retired)#but im really only now as an adult wondering if my mom or dad picked up on *something* at the time.#whether it was me being probably visibly uncomfortable or how angrily the pastor spat his venom#or how the congregation eagerly took in every word. nodding and muttering 'thats right' under their breath and clapping for the hatred show#at least the pastor i grew up listening to really did focus on spreading messages of love and compassion.#again. more of the 'love the sinner hate the sin' type congregation. a bit 'dont ask dont tell'#on the bright side i wasnt directly exposed to homo/transphobic violence at that age. on the other side i didnt know#that being gay or trans was a thing you could even be until i was in 10th grade#i learned about being trans and i was like ohhhhh okay. hey parents can you call me this shortened masc version of my name. dont ask why
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need them to put eddie in a coma so he can have his own little coma dream realization
#like can you imagine#maybe he didnt reenlist#maybe hes got that perfect little romantic life he keeps thinking he had with shannon#maybe they stayed in el paso#or the three of them moved to la together when shannons mom got sick#and maybe eddie isnt a firefighter maybe he went into contracting or landscaping because he likes to work with his hands#or maybe he went into nursing because he likes helping people#but hes living a perfect little life with a son and wife and their white picket fence but he cant shake the feeling that something is wrong#he pulls aside for a firetruck on his way to work and something about it makes him feel funny like he misses something#and so he asks shannon when he gets home#hey did i ever apply to the fire academy#and she says no why would you have done that?? as she places a warmed frozen lasagna down on the diner table#he watches chris pick at his plate and swears that chris loved lasagna#and maybe hes out on his lunch break at the park and he hears a woman cry and run to find a man collapsed on the ground and shes panicking#so he tells her to call 911 and he starts compressions#the fire department shows up and hen and chim take his place and he fills them in before stepping back#youre good under pressure buck says from beside him#and eddie just kinda looks at him for a second because#he feels right#this feels right#being right here beside this man with a crooked grin on his face feels right#but eddie just shrugs and says well i was in the army kinda came with the territory#and then bobbys voice crackles through the radio buck i told you to stop flirting on calls get in the truck now#and buck returns an ay ay captain and winks at eddie before hopping in the firetruck#he watches engine 118 drive away and thinks he should be right next to buck in that truck#okay i got carried away but i need it#like there are so many possibilities for eddie coma dream and like#tim listen to me i need you to do think i need eddie to be put into a coma so he can realize that his life now is everything hes needed#me thinks
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
no bcs the comment in a ballad of songbirds and snakes between Snow and Lucy when Lucy says about the Katniss not being ready yet because "it's a little too early"
Kebfk
I can't help but feel like that is referencing the fact that the revolution would happen in time, people would try repeatedly to bring the games and ultimately Snow to a stop but until Katniss was 'ready' it wouldn't be successful.
(so much more text / rambling in the tags ,, sorry . . !)
#๑ ; my posts#๑ ; rambles#this is probably worded badly and has probably been pointed out before but i cant help but think about it#i didnt even think of it the first time i saw the movie bcs o was focused on the plant being called Katniss and what that would have meant#to Snow to years later meet a girl called Katniss when Lucy 'left to go pick some' BUT now thinking back i feel like the mention of it bein#too early could have meant more#and this part im DEFINITELY over thinking but when Lucy says about “going to dig up some Katniss” Snow says “isnt it too early for that?”#and Lucy says “the world changes awfully fast”#it makes me think about how Katniss was SO young and yet the face of the rebellion because despite all the previous attempts#ultimately she is the one who has to do it-#morally it should never have been down to a child yet its as said. the world changes awfully fast.#and she is necessary to changing that world#GODDAMN imma shush now cos i rambled HARD here but yea#just sharing my thoughts so i stop info dumping too my mum#this is probably worded bad but this is my first actual post that isnt just a reblog on this blog &#i dont wanna get stuff wrong or upset anyone- so yea 😅#anyways enjoy my rambling ig?#the hunger games trilogy#a ballad of songbirds and snakes#lucy gray baird#coriolanus snow#katniss everdeen
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
light emeto warning
#man i was all excited to talk about how today at work i felt the most supported ive ever felt at work#and how good of a day i had. i didnt even throw up today#but problems with partner are growing still. he simply doesnt care about me much lately. like#he keeps drinking my pedialyte while im at work. which i need for after work when im dehydrated because i cant keep water down at work#because i throw it up if i drink more than a few sips here and there#and he just drinks it and he knows i cant drive. so i cant just go and replace it. he doesnt replace it. i have to get more delivered.#he also indirectly but very clearly puts down anything creative i do. whether its a drawing or a video or whatever. anything i make.#like. thats just some examples of late. its not worth continuing to talk about. its really wearing on me. im worn down.#to touch on the good things at work. a lot of instances of silent love. it was wonderful. idk if anyone besides my managers and#like 3 coworkers have heard that i havent been feeling good. but ive had so much help lately. i felt like a princess LOL#like 6'5 guy who i dont interact with much did some of my work when i wasnt even around and he couldve just clocked out instead#a lot of people just being proactive and nice to me... its strange in a way because im kind of the#Fully Aware and On Top of things person although ill delegate when necessary#but for the most part im kinda just like... the person who knows a lot and picks up the slack with a smile lol. so its been nice.#and then my manager called a face i was making (i thought it was a neutral expression) adorable... i dont get many physical compliments...#the disconnect is wild lol. its kind of hard on my psyche ngl.#the positive stuff at work is hard for me to process bc im not good with compliments. im learning though.#and so that in itself takes some brain power and rewiring how i think about things. but then the lack of care from him#its familiar! but its painful too. so thats a different set of mental skills i have to implement.#so im doing both of these at the same time and its like im going crazy lol shit is DIRE
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
work was such a shitshow in the morning that it trailed into the afternoon and evening and now im just hit with this sinking dread of having to go and do it all again tomorrow
#racing!#a blind lady came to the gym and her ride was set to pick her up right when my shift was starting#and i was asked to go retrieve her from the massage chairs#and she didnt want to leave bc she couldnt work out bc she didnt get a personal trainer (we dont have any at this location)#(she didnt call before her arrival so we couldnt even try to set something up)#and she made me call her driver to try and reschedule her pickup but it was too late and she was like well its not my problem if they come#and im like WELL DONT MAKE IT MY PROBLEM THEN??? in my head but outwardly im on the brink of tears#she finally gets up and puts shoes on and i lead her up to the front desk bc her fucking driver is there#and she weasles some free drinks out of me bc i didnt realize she gave us a nonfunctional debit csrd to put on file#so we couldnt charge her for anything#and as i was waiting for her to gether her stuff so we could walk her to her car she hounds me to try and get gym merch that i dont gave#like we dont. carry any. all we have is employee uniform shirts. she said she would call the ceo and make him give her an employee shirt.#i dont say anything except oh maam your ride is here! and when she got in the car she said oh i wont call before i come in next time either#lets do this all over again it was so fun :) and i had to try not to audibly start crying#and after i got back in i helped a guy cancel his membership#and informed him we had to charge him for this month bc he missed the cutoff date and he cussed me out and that time i did actually cry#quite visibly. he got uncomfortable and walked away but loudly said This Is Bullshit as he did which only made me more upset somehow. hell#and then i was overwhelmed and overstimulated and Fucking Hungry bc i couldnt go on break until way later than normal (it was busy and loud)#and i had to go buy a drink bc the doordasher forgot mine and the line at the store was short but it took fucking 20 minutes to check out#bc One Guy was holding up the line and then i only had 10 minutes left to eat and try to recover#didnt recover! and then i went back in and got overstimulated again for the next Three Hours
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ok but ACTUALLY. The fighting in Lily Sunder is so wild. When else do you see destiel in a fight like that and they're both just HANGING AROUND each other? Sure cas makes the move to get out of the house when he gets the call but, unlike many other times, he lets them come along!!!
Idk maybe... maybe they just both realize its not that serious this time so they just both wait it out until they happen to make up. Or maybe they just wanna be around each other. Maybe dean knows he should be pissed but he's really not. Kinda seems like projecting to me but ugh I dunno its so cute how quickly his annoyance at cas kinda fades into just pure jealousy and then he's confident he doesnt need to fight to keep cas so he just stays with him
And cas doesnt leave at the end of the episode either. It's pretty rare to have an episode without cas in it where he didnt fuck off to do some important castiel business. They start and end together this is so important to me so so important
#rehks rants#destiel#lily sunder has some regrets#yockey knows what I need#and pause from destiel for a minute but sam? sam in this cas-centric episode is so cute too#it really stuck out to me in the end when cas says he would die to make sure they didnt#sam says 'dont say that' and all three of them have a decent convo about their feelings atm#also with just like... devil in the details last season cas' whole thing was that he thought he had to be useful#he thought he was the fall guy or the one who didnt mattered so he said yes to the devil#sam (and dean sometimes) seems to be at least trying to push against that and show cas that acceptance#why do cas episodes have the best tfw moments they're SUCH a family ansnfnfngng#12x10#I know cas says I love you in two episodes but I think this one shows it between all of them more#also this has so many good destiel moments but my underated favorite#when dean realizes cas' buddy ishim may have lied and he's all 'I'm gonna call cas'#'cmon cmon cmon cmon' 'yeah he's not picking up'
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
screenshot dump
#dino.png#myV: léo-vincent valentine#cyberpunk 2077#léo-vincent infodump of the day#ermmmmmm lets do a big one#oh yeah. here's some lore from the 10k word docu i have#léo-vin's mother was a joytoy. completely unplanned pregnancy & he was born prematurely. he was born in some random motel bathroom#miracle birth but they expected him to die soon anyw. bc otherwise she thought she'd mercy-kill him#bc she believed nothing was crueler than having a child in NC. and she also didnt want one#but he survives somehow and so hes just kind of there. she doesnt rlly.. idk...its very complicated but-#-from his memories he thinks she didnt really like him#oh yeah important note: his mother's 'friend' who assisted giving birth to him was padre's late ex wife#they were estranged but she picked up when she called#so hes like...a godfather in a way#his mother didnt want to name him bc she didnt want to grow attached to him. so léo never actually is never named.#they essentially started calling him 'baby valentine' (his mothers 'stage name' was valentine)#he starts going by V later and then when he meets jackie and mama welles#she wants to get his name incase anything happens to him and they wanna memorialise him. and shes like#even if you dont want to tell me just write it on a piece of paper and i wont look until then#he tells her she doesnt have a name. all three parts of his name (léo-vincent valentine)#are like...hand-picked. but that is all for the infodump. Okay bye
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
going to have a nervous breakdown today over work i think
#day 5 of not having a manager#day 6 of not having any kind of meeting so i know whats going on in the shop#so therefore day 6 of customers screaming at me because i don't know what's going on with their car#because day 3 this week of my SA not full attendance#she didnt call off she said she would let me know when she'd be in. havent heard a word from her in 4 hours#so i keep trying to reschedule customers once it gets to within like 90 mins of their appt#but most of them arent picking up the phone#so they get here and theyre mad that all im able to do is photograph their car and take their contact info#my techs are furious because without a writer theyre at a standstill at 11am#and also that my fuckass detailer has done nothing all day. literally nothing. less than nothing.#im not gonna be able to take a lunch because there's no one to make sure the office doesnt burn down#im losing it#says kenna
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
why does everything i get really into always end up being so god damn niche. by the year 2035 i am going to be blogging exclusively about the interpersonal relationships between the pillbugs and snails hiding underneath the bricks lining the flowerbeds in my parent's garden.
#im falling hard into the virvox guys rn sowwy. i like em a lot hee hee. i didnt realize just how small the fanbase for em was tho#actually i didnt realize how small the company that makes them were either. i got so used to the yamahas and cryptons of the vsynth world#that i forgot that like honestly. a lot of the voicebank makers and some of the software makers themselves#theyre like companies of like maybe 5 employees with like no funding LOL not a bad thing but i forgor#but yeah i was looking up to see if there was like. a fanon reason why people shipped takehiro and ryusei? not judging because i get it#i like took one look at the virvox guys and immediately slotted them as a very strange boyband (a catboy and a middle aged dragon man....)#and also took a second look at takehiro and ryusei and assumed they were childhood friends. i saw the doujin flash before my eyes#but also looking into it it seems the fanbase is also like. 20 people. and like 3 of them ship that#and at least one person ships whiteCUL and ryusei? why not LOL when it comes to vsynths sometimes a ship can be spearheaded by like#one very prolific artist HGDJKDFSHDJK which actually reminds me. honestly i dont really have many vsynth ships#i guess i dont really partake in a lot of shipping stuff deeply but i like romance!! you know i like love stories. you know this#i mean i keep calling the eclipsed sounds characters the celestial polycule for a reason tho. im not joking around about this#this is serious to me. they are stars and moons and suns and together they hang out and kiss. in the sky. this is serious to me#also i do like solaria x eleanor forte actually. its a bit random but i understand it. i understand it#and of course the aformentioned takehiro x ryusei. and also the whole virvox polycule. get that old man in here too#(what do they call people like me. a multishipper? i do that a lot. you know this from my otome game fanart LOL)#OH and i dont remember either of their names rn but i like that the cevio bank anju inami voiced has like a big fat crush on like#that girl with the brown hair. i like that theyre like. besties (turning into something more wink wonk)#thinks with all my brain. i think thats it. i dont know why theres so little. i think its because i think of them as like#audio sample libraries first and foremost and i forget about their characters and relationships LOL#but im not against the idea of making some audio sample libraries kiss...... not at all#picks up a guitar sampler and a sound effect cd. presses them together.#hee hee. they kiss
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Experience I had at the arcade today
#red arcade tokyo tower#shitpost#my art#digital art#whipped this up in twenty minutes adequate png finding included#kirby#claw machine#i didnt get a kirby :[#i spent ¥200 and got NOTHING#i picked him up successfully and the machine dropped him TWICE#at least i got a stupid thing from a gachapon machine#oh and then two randomass SCHOOLBOYS rolled in and picked him up#“oh かわいい！” [carelessly THROWS him into his bag#these were high schoolers so obviously calling them boys like theyre 6 is unnecessary BUT STILL#it was like 11 in the morning why was there a huge flood of high school students at TOKYO TOWER???#i dont live in japan nor did i attend a senior school here for any period of time but like#they were all in uniforms so it wasnt a day off i dont think idk why they were there#they judged me when i failed the posing game 😔
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Butch affirmation I guess that my straight and very conforming baby brother keeps wanting to borrow my clothes:')
#he called me several times when i didnt pick up due to socializing so o got worried something might have happened but no he just desperately#needed to know asap of he could borrow my old jacket :')#its really sweet tho#and ultimate proof i dress like just some boring guy#butch#musings
37 notes
·
View notes