#so very tired of this tbh
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urgh why is the anxiety
#last few days have been very hard to get anything done at all#finally read a fic i've been meaning to for a while and couldn't comment or let the author know about it despite wanting to so badly#just sent an email with an additional application for money (i send one almost every month this is nothing new) and now i am *stressed*#i miss talking to people so badly but whenever i do it just kick-starts my anxiety and i spend all my time after thinking about all the#stupid things i did or said and just blargh.#so very tired of this tbh#Smowkie talks#Smowkie whines#about Smowkie
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Learning about the Doctor Who specials' expanded budget: oh no, what if they overuse CGI to look more 'professional' and high-budget?
The first scene of the Doctor Who Special:
#:D#[ID: The Fourteenth Doctor looking tired in front of a green screen of space \End ID]#it's still just as cheesy and silly as it was during 10's run#doctor who#fourteenth doctor#the image looks like something a fan would make tbh#the only very jarring part of the budget was how nice quality the camera was throughout the episode#I kind of wish it was a little less crisp because it made everything look a bit off in a way#but I also haven't watched 13's run so maybe it's not as stark of a jump as it felt for me#10 especially always felt very fuzzy and warm in terms of camera quality#tenth doctor#the star beast#twilight-zoned-out#doctor who spoilers#dw#dw spoilers
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strechies :D
for DDVAU November Day 1 & 2: CG/Grian & HG/Scar!
since the option is both person and persona... I did both lol
prompt list can be found here <3
#ddvauvember#ddvau fanart#ddvau cuteguy#ddvau hotguy#grian#goodtimeswithscar#this is set in like. some hypothetical future where they both know each other's identity already I guess lol#I. was too tired to look for ref poses and so it do look the way it look#but hey I tried out some new brushes n stuff so this is good enough for me <3#on a more serious note though#ddvau is very dear to me#and is tbh the reason/the thing that truly kickstarted this whole tumblr and fandom and eventually drawing again n stuff journey for me :D#thank you guys <3
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Since the elden ring fandom has been incredibly sensitive as of late, let me put a warning: under the cut there‘s a ship art of Radahn and Miquella hugging :)
Nothing NSFW but I don‘t want people to see smth they really dislike for multiple reasons in the tags of their favourite characters lmao
Let‘s all enjoy whatever brings us delight in this game 🙏
#elden ring#elden ring fanart#elden ring dlc#elden ring miquella#miquella fanart#elden ring sote#sote#sote spoilers#er sote#radahn consort of miquella#elden ring radahn#miquella the unalloyed#miquella the kind#miquella#promised consort radahn#starscourge radahn#im a bit tired of seeing so much hate on this website tbh qq#also radahn isnt charmed here#its post-canon of like#a few centuries at the very least#where miquella struggled enough to realise he needs additional brains#and radahn kind of accepted that he still has duties to fulfill#slowly discovering each other once again
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Day 2: Timeloop / Xiao Qi and Jiu Ge
I am cringe and I am not even free
Feel free to reuse this idea but 24 hours are not enough for me to finish an entire comic. I could have taken the simpler prompt but nOOOOOO timeloop is too tempting. Past me why are we like this
#svsss#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#qijiu#qijiuweek2024#the basic idea for this was that both yqy and sj remember each loop#the loop started after their individual deaths in PIDW and resets them to close to disciple era#aka the time Yue Qi was in the caves and SJ presumably got away from the Qiu household or was already with Wu Yanzi#I imagine the first few loops they qi deviated so hard from the shock that they didnt even make it like 1 hour in the loop before beingrese#and then had a few loops just fucking around and finding out#eventually they realise that the other has the memories of all loops and so begins the talks and figuring how tf they can get out of this#maybe they resolve their issues with the promise or not your choice tbh#they try different plans and methods#but they keep dying (read: SJ keeps dying first and YQY either dies or sewerslides not soon after) and getting reset with no end in sight#until the last pages where the svsss timeline begins#SJ got replaced with SY and the system isn't letting YQY join him in death or smth nor letting him do anything about SY being there instead#And due to their closeness from being immensily tired from all the loops#YQY notices it immediately but can't do anything about it#the bonus for SY is that this timeline was very kind to LBH & co - 79 figured by now that keeping him in the sect and happy was their best#bet at staying alive - or well at least for longer#I'll continue this storyline in one of the future prompts of this qijiu week#btw the one with the cliff is just the whoopsie daisy timeline where SJ accidentally falls into the Abyss trying to keep LBH from falling i#79 had a bit of a good laugh about that one#cw death#cw violence#cw blood#cw angst
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Human fear is the window to the soul or whatever ://
#digital art#tropical's art#art#cw eyestrain#high contrast#eye strain#collinlock16#Ouuugh Zander oouuugh AwesomeG they were just kids man like broooo (Morbius too I guess that minimum wage worker)#I hope more horrors come I hope Hungry eats more children alive and Souler eats more child souls#Hungry just letting AwesomeG beg for forgiveness after asking him if he believes in god gets to me for some reason#Also I_AM_BIG_KEVIN is here#He DDOS'es soon after this#As per the video#Bro was set up by Souler but had a secret technique (“fuck you DDOS!”)#Also Souler cannot get to Collin#He's too tired#So it can't get to his soul via fear#I just realized in the part 2 of colin's thing he tells Souler to fuck off in the beginning animation#Tbh real#Minecraft ARGs but they call Kevin#minecraft arg but the protagonist is tired#I like this series very much and a normal amount :]#The amount of newspaper articles I had to download for Kevin is too many#I also made them related to what he does/his video because why not man#Also there's no way that BigK (he debunked Zander's herobrine sighting) isn't I_AM_BIG_KEVIN and that Zander's disappearance sparked his#Interest in the paranormal#Leading to his paranormal mercenary job#Also shoutouts to the total of 2 (I know there's more lol) fellow Oneshef Minecraft ARG fans out here#We need more people watching this it's good and funny and terrifying and it loves and hates the state of Minecraft ARGs and the universe#Said I love you or whatever
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"it was good fun! Surprisingly competitive I would say!"
#LITERALLY THE CUTEST MAN TO EVER EXIST#ive said this before but#seriously if you ever feel bad abt his results#just go watch his interview bcs wow nowadays seemingly he is never upset on main#as suzuki said to me: what drugs does aston have him on#bcs seriosuly#bro dnfed and is fine?? super smiley even?????#i think its just a matter of extremely low expectations tbh so he cant really be affected anymore atp#and he was happy about being up in the front so long!#bcs they didnt think he could sustain it that long both cause the pace and the tires#lmao n the other hand carlos seemed very salty imo#i think he said smth along the lines of fernando being too ambitious????? bro youre talking abt fernando alonso like??#and said he ruined both their results ah stfu dude#the guy youre talking abt literally dnfed and is all smiley#fernando alonso#2024 chinese gp#f1#formula 1#we do a little bit of f1
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something i've already posted about in the past but am thinking about again because of the conversations in this episode is that i still truly do not understand bells hells'(well, particularly ashton's) view on what is going to happen if the information about aeor gets sent out to the people of exandria. obviously, i'm not an average person living in that world and am instead a viewer of the media with fairly extensive knowledge of the lore, so i could definitely just be missing what the impact would actually be! but the insistence that it would be a world shattering revelation that completely turns everyone against the odds just... doesn't make sense to me?
unless ludinus has a way of editing the information he presents and can take away the context, which would basically make the "footage" even more strange, what they're going to be seeing is... the gods saving themselves from people with the active ability to murder them all and having a rather humanizing crisis of what they should do about it? i guess the working with the betrayer gods part could be considered the controversial aspect of it, but overall, considering everything else that was destroyed in the calamity, aeor really was the one instance that was closest to being "justified". i don't think anyone who cares enough about the gods for this to cause any sort of big disruption of faith would have as big of a problem with it as they are assuming, nor do i really think it's something that would cause mass revolts against the gods in people who aren't devout.
#critical role#cr spoilers#i have spent so much time thinking abt this tbh. so much of my brain power is dedicated to thinking about religion in exandria#i do admit that i'm thinking about it in a way that is very logic-driven when if in the scenario itd be more emotion-driven#this is just nonsense from my thoughts attempted to be put into words that make sense to anyone besides myself LMAO#i was gonna add another part about why their idea that it will Massively interupt their power is strange also#considering the fact they watched a freshly Completely wiped out of followers everlight have the same power as all the other gods in aeor#but this post is long enough and i feel like whenever i post about this im worried abt how it comes across#so i dont feel like adding on to it anymore than i have sjskfn#i am honestly just very tired of god debates. i think there was more interesting parts in last night's than some of the others#but it feels so circular every time. and i still love you orym for being the one who sees this and i want to give him a kiss about it
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day 6
#i kinda dont like this one much#i would have done something with more focus in the eyes#but honestly i am tired#and i wanted to draw rose#so i decided to listen to “when olivia matures into bravocat” by pengosolvent bc it reminds me of her#but i started getting emotional#but i dont think i managed to capture the feeling i wanted very well#but ill post it anyway#i want to draw more roses#im reluctant to put tags on this one tbh#doodle#rose lalonde#homestuck#cringetober 2024#cringetober#and FUCK i just realized i skipped gijinka#anyway theres still time#its not morning yet for me!!!!!!!!#starters fandom here i go
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just a couple of flappers enjoying the ( very dead! ) ambience of a speakeasy!
bonus queer frepper doodle <3
#my art.#lackadaisy#calvin freckle mcmurray#ivy pepper#frepper#tracy j butler#oh transgirl freckle you are so real to me <333#heteroflexible ivy x transgirl bi freckle is peak btw and you will see more of it from me#anyway!!! been chipping at this for days and i’m tired of looking at it so! i’m posting it now so i can move on to other things#but i enjoyed this sooo much … brings me great joy abd tbh i should do more silly doodles in the future#very fun! i just lack the creativity for it sometimes lol
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Even stardust shimmers, darling 🌟 (Patreon)
#Doodles#ISaT#Loop#ISaT spoilers#Mostly inspired by The Star of Your Dreams tbh <3 There'll be more after this as well haha#Will I ever give any Sif two eyebrows?#Not as long as they've got the one eye!#I also don't know why it just feels more correct to leave the expression ''blank'' I guess#Anyway Sif!Loop is a massive cutie and I'm fully drawn in by them looking Just Similar Just Different from him hehe#Sparkle-shaped scar! Yes absolutely#The robe is 100% Star of Your Dreams lol - I know they're obscured by their pose and it's dark but also sheer?? Their modesty??? Lol#Comfy PJs underneath - personally I saw the robe in my mind's eye as getting more sheer the closer to the extremities it got#So fully opaque over the body and very organza and see-through around the wrists and ankles and so on#Either's cute tho ♪#Differentiating Loop with a sleeveless is also excellent ah <3 Show off the arms! The sparkles!#Which can be taken as Fine and Not painful if you wanted :') I don't but it's fine it's fine lol#They're just sparkly! It doesn't mean anything else! ;;#They really are quite cute <3#Tired or smarmy there's no in-between lol#Their eyes really are fun to draw mismatched in more than just pupil :D
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can i interest anyone in some codywan kissing on this fine thursday evening?
“Please, darling.” Obi-Wan looked at him with a gaze that could have melted butter. Fortunately, Cody was made of stronger stuff that than. “I promise not to lose it again.”
“Really?” Cody raised an eyebrow, pulled himself up to his full height so he could look down at Obi-Wan, just a little. “You promise?”
“Oh yes,” Obi-Wan leaned forward, let his eyes fall to Cody’s lips. Let them rest there until he knew Cody noticed, the bastard. “I promise.”
Cody didn’t move. With his free hand, the hand not holding Obi-Wan’s lightsaber far above his head, he threaded his fingers through Obi-Wan’s hair. Felt him shudder against his hand. “You see,” He kept his voice low in a way he knew drove Obi-Wan a little mad, “I don’t quite believe you.”
Obi-Wan batted his eyelashes in a way that said, who, me? Then smiled, his voice kept carefully level, “My darling, you wound me.”
“You’ll get yourself wounded, more like.”
“I would never,” Obi-Wan leaned closer, close enough that Cody could feel his breath against his cheek, “Afterall, I have the Force to protect me.”
“You have me.” It was a promise spoken again and again, whispered into Obi-Wan’s neck in the darkness of his quarters, shouted silently each time they fought side by side. Spoken so often, it was as familiar as breathing, yet still they said it. I’m here. I’m here.
Obi-Wan’s answer was a quick kiss placed at the corner of his mouth. For a brief moment, Cody almost gasped, almost dropped the lightsaber there and then. Instead he pulled back, just a little.
Obi-Wan gasped into the empty space. Still close enough to feel his breath, Cody shivered.
“Promise me,” His voice was heavy, weighted with emotion he couldn’t quite give words to. “Please, Obi-Wan.”
“Cody,” Obi-Wan’s voice was the mirror of his own, heavy with emotion in a way Cody so rarely heard, “Force, Cody, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to worry you. I will try. I promise you that.”
“Alright. Alright. I know.” He finally let his hand that clutched the lightsaber drop. Stood there for a moment, the ‘saber resting in his steady hand between them. He leaned towards Obi-Wan, almost felt the tiny gasp that escaped his lips as Cody’s hand drifted to his belt. He clipped the lightsaber to Obi-Wan belt, let his hand hover for just a moment. Obi-Wan stood still beneath his hands, it was only his breathing that betrayed him.
“Thank you, darling.” The words were whispered into Cody’s ear, softly, they settled in his head.
“Just don’t lose it again.”
Obi-Wan hummed, and Cody watched as his hand curled its way around his neck. He leaned slightly into the touch, even like this the calluses and scars that decorated the hand were known to him, just as intimately as his own.
The hand twisted into his curls, gently pulling his head back, just a little. Despite himself he gasped, the little noise an almost desperate thing as it flew from his lips.
Obi-Wan grinned, there was something dangerous about it, just at the edges. “My dear, I never mean to disappoint you.”
He meant to respond, but found Obi-Wan’s lips against his own. He breathed into the kiss, instead, his mind filled only with Obi-Wan. The Jedi’s other hand curled around his jaw, his thumb pressed carefully into the skin beneath his ears, into the place that Obi-Wan knew made him gasp, desperate beneath his hands.
After what felt like a lifetime, a star born and collapsed again, Obi-Wan pulled back. His nose just brushing Cody’s, he breathed his name. It was promise, and prayer. Spoken with so much reverence that, if he was not seeing his own feelings reflected back at him, he would never have believed such a thing was possible.
He let the word hang, just for a moment, before he tugged gently at Obi-Wan’s hair. Felt him shudder against his hand, pulled apart in that instant. Felt honoured that he was allowed to see this, trusted enough that Obi-Wan let himself shatter like this.
He pressed Obi-Wan’s name against his neck, felt the way his hands, still resting against Cody, twitched at the contact. He pressed another kiss to Obi-Wan’s neck, then another to his jaw. Eventually, he reached Obi-Wan’s mouth. Hovered there for a moment, allowing his breath to flutter against Obi-Wan’s lips.
Something that sounded like his name caught up in a desperate plea fell from Obi-Wan, and at that Cody kissed him.
Heat curled through him at the way Obi-Wan melted into the contact, letting himself fall endlessly into Cody’s hands. Trusting Cody to catch him.
In answer, Cody held him. Did not allow any part of him to slip between his fingers as they curled their way through his hair. His free hand had, at some point, come to rest upon Obi-Wan’s back and he relished in the way Obi-Wan leant into the touch.
It was this trust, as much as the contact, that sent a heady sense of affectionthrough Cody. Love, if he was brave enough to let himself think it.
Obi-Wan gasped, briefly. Again and again, Cody’s name fell from his lips.
“Here, darling. I’m here.” He couldn’t quite bring himself to say the rest.
#i say evening like it’s not almost 11 pm#so if you see any grammar mistakes pls pretend you don’t <3#i was going to work on my wip but well i wanted to write codywan kissing#the codywan kissing propaganda is working very well !!#they’re in love <3 btw <3#also if you want to add a little angst think about the imagery of cody catching obi wan in terms of obi wan falling after cody orders him#shot down during order 66#that’s not worded the best but in my defence im tired#the amount of scenes which are basically just some version of this is slightly embarrassing tbh#codywan#ally’s writings#also btw if the ending feels a bit random sorry i couldn’t work out how to finish it :((
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I want Chaos Theory to go more into detail with the characters' trauma, esp Ben, I want to see how he acts during another pterodon attack, I want to see how he reacts to heights, nearly falling from a high height. I know it's a kids show, but I feel like we never got a proper look into Ben and his trauma, like we did get glimpses into it, and I think he's very well written, but I want to see it at more than surface level, dude was assumed dead for probably around a month and had to survive by himself on a dino infested island and you expect me to believe he's doing pretty decent all things considered? I wanna see a real look into his paranoia and anxieties surrpunding Brooklynn's death, I wanna see how he feels knowing he introduced Brooklynn to the website that ultimately lead to her "death".
I want to see Ben treated as more than a comedic relief for more than a few scenes.
#i am VERY tired to this may be worded very poorly#disclaimer this is not at ALL saying hes written poorly or that all he is is comedic relief#cause hes so much more than that#but like... other than his paranoia we dont really see how he feels about brooklynns death/how hes dealing with it#which like yeah his paranoia is how hes dealing with it#but idk i wanna see more of it#if that makes sense#let that boy break down#or punch something#or both#both tbh#ben pincus#jurassic world chaos theory#camp cretaceous#jurassic world camp cretaceous#camp cretaceous chaos theory#jwcc#jwct
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Ok I know I'm heavily biased here but like I kinda love that Astarion's romance is one of the few in this type of video game where you basically end up canonically unmarried and childfree in his "good" ending? Just travelling the world??
Like it's honestly the millennial dream lmfaoo cannot believe i chose what would undoubtedly be my favorite option, first try
#also love that he's basically atheist like ok thanks you made the man exactly coded to be my type#and the humor and beautiful curly hair is very much something my IRL partner has too so like... how can i resist#anyways not sure a lot of people relate cause i think a lot of people want that fairytale romance#even tho wyll is right there yall#but i love me an unconventional or nontraditional one!!#i'm TIRED of being married with children as the endgame pls let's not do it#also a lot of people seem into him being a dad and im like... how? why? where in canon did he ever lmfao#more power to ya if you dig it but i just dont see it being in character#like in DAI i loved cullen and my inquisitor getting married and having a dog#and they seem the type to wants kids one day. but Tav & Astarion? lol no#i just think it's neat#is this a hot take? i have no idea but i don't see it mentioned a lot as a new fan tbh#pls do not come at me you can enjoy whatever you like#i haven't seen the ascended stuff so idk if being his 'consort' is like being his bride#but i feel like overall it's not and the vibe isn't all that different in this sense#except that you're hosting evil parties instead of travelling :/#Astarion#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#bg3#also YEA he's nice to Arabella but you can tolerate certain kids without wanting one or being 'good parent' material#case in point: me lmfao#OKAY update i saw the AA stuff and yeah you're kind of implied vamp married and he does mention spawn as children 😫#but he also says in banter he won't make any other spawn??? so what is it dude#anyway that's also clearly the “bad” route and he doesn't seem as happy as unascended#who feels “truly free”#and if you're durge I'm pretty sure its even worse to consider having kids?? lol#but i digress#pk plays bg3
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When I see stuff like this I kinda want to bash my head into a wall:
To start off, I’m not sure whether this person was commenting on book or show Cersei, but honestly, it doesn’t even matter because she’s so much more than the ‘ambitious villain’ or the ‘murderous girlboss’ tropes in both the book and show.
(Of course, I do have my issues with the way Cersei was written in the show like most people but this is simply a rant post so I’m not going to go through the differences of Show vs Book Cersei)
Cersei is a female character who was shaped by her environment, who’s insecurities were created by her environment, and she’s a woman who’s idiotic mistakes can be traced back to how her environment shaped her. She’s much more than a murderous girlboss, she’s both a victim of the system and also a beneficiary of it, while also acting as an agent of it to keep the status quo while also desiring what the system denied her.
Cersei is NUANCED and complicated and even now people hate that about her and want her to have been a purely evil woman handcrafted in a vacuum, ignoring the context of her life because readers would rather not engage with Cersei’s victimhood and nuances because that ruins their idea of: She Was The Problem and Always The Problem. (People would rather say that she deserved her walk of shame instead of interacting meaningfully with the theme of systematic gender-based violence that is so prevalent in Cersei’s story. The exploration of patriarchal violence in Show Alicent’s story is done so horribly in comparison.)
And what really pissed me off about these tags is that this person has clearly decided that they don’t care to interact with the nuance of Cersei and are fine with flattening her, and yet they shit on others for not liking Alicent.
Because of the way Alicent is written in this show, she almost always has a ‘woe is me I can do no wrong’ attitude, which of course drives people away from the character (woe is me I deserve to take a child’s eye 🥺). However, what actually annoys me is how she’s made out to be stupid, foolish, ignorant, and inconsistent due to the horrible writing of this show, all of which are deviations from her book characterization. Also, I despise it when people want me to support writing decisions and changes made in adaptations that are downright misogynistic and are meant to attract the male gaze.
But what pisses many people, including myself, off is how the changes made negatively impacted many other characters. Alicent’s terrible characterization is like a black hole that distorts and warps the whole story! It’s annoying af!
So when people like this say: ‘She’s nuanced and people just can’t handle it 🙄;’ I say: No. She’s horribly written and a different character from the book and people have a right to be critical about these changes that stripped a female character of 1) her agency and 2) her intelligence!
And the thing is, there was little reason for the writers to have made all these changes to Alicent’s characterization! In the book she is an interesting character with clear motives and understandable reactions. She’s cunning and ambitious and acts the way a noble lady who became queen would. And despite her clear ambitions and dislike of Rhaenyra, she still makes a comment wondering about who would protect the Princess from Ser Criston, and yet she then takes Cole into her service after his falling out with Rhaenyra. That’s a perfect example of nuance! Show Alicent could never compare to book Alicent’s clear moral values and consistent disregard of said moral values in pursuit of power.
And because of this, Book Alicent isn’t easy to stomach. It’s hard for most people to come to terms with a character like her and it’s even harder for people to feel sympathetic for her at the end when she went mad with grief.
On the other hand, Show Alicent was designed in a way to garner pity, and when the writers felt like her current arc wouldn’t be enough to garner the specific reaction they wanted they would then throw in a time skip and suddenly she’s completely different and yet still Thee victim. She’s designed to be as sympathetic as fucking possible! The camera angles, the background music, and the lighting is set up in a way to make sure you the viewer feels pity or sympathy for her! Cause that’s her role in this series! She’s thee Ultimate Victim!
But too bad for the writers as many people are fed up with this kind of inconsistent writing. Even when the writers created a whole new challenge for Alicent where she’s shitted on by the green council and forced to face the beast she helped to raise, I and many others could never feel any satisfaction as it was clear that once again Alicent was being made to be Thee Ultimate Victim who was just led astray by the patriarchy and was a victim of it and was only just realizing it so don’t you pity her don’t you feel sad for her and now she’s trying to do the right thing so pls pls pls pity her 🥺~ So it shouldn’t be surprising that many people are annoyed by these eNLiGhtEnEd changes that have led to a complete deviation from the source material.
To summarize: Cersei is an excellent fucking character who’s by no means easy to stomach, and because she’s not easy to stomach she’s often reduced to annoying ass tropes by dumbasses who are reading above their comprehension level. But when you actually try to understand her, you can easily see why she turned out the way she did and you can feel sympathy for her while understanding that she’s both victim and perpetrator! On the other hand, Show Alicent is a mess and HOTD is trying to make her serve a different narrative role than she did in the books so ofc people are going to be unhappy with the changes as book readers are once again faced with the annoying reality that the writers don’t give a fuck about the source material.
#tbh i can’t believe im actually posting about this show again#but i got so angry by the way that these tags were worded#maybe the person didn’t mean to make it sound as tho cersei wasn’t nuanced to them#but reading between the lines kinda makes it seem as tho they were implying that#rant post#just annoyed af rn#alicent’s narrative role has changed and yes i’m very annoyed by that and that’s one of the reasons as to why i dropped hotd#cause wtf are they going to change next in order to be consistent with these changes?#unless hotd writers decide to once again change alicent’s whole ass character arc and make her seem even more fking wishy washy#bsffr alicent doesn’t come close to cerseis lvl of nuance#reducing cersei to Ambitious Villain is literally rage inducing#tbh it clearly shows that this person only appreciates certain kinds of female characters and can’t stomach badass girl bosses 🙄#not to say that GOTs writing was good lol it was shit but at least the female characters had consistent goals!#hotd fandom critical#anti alicent stans#anti alicent hightower#cersei lannister#the audacity to say that cersei doesn’t display real flaws and isn’t vulnerable#maybe i’m blowing this out of proportion and maybe im making a lot of assumptions but im struggling to care bc im so done with alicent stans#i’m real tired so i’m sorry about any grammar mistakes !#keep cersei’s name outa ur damn mouths 😡
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heads up: reader struggling w friendships (feeling uninvolved + unheard)
felix hears the way you sigh as you come back into the room, and doesn't move quite yet. he knows you well enough. he listens as your footsteps draw nearer, and you pass in front of him as quickly as you can before throwing yourself onto the opposite end of the couch. it's enough to make him raise a brow--usually you'll sit next to him because you like being close to him--but he can't take his eyes off the tv screen quite yet.
"everything okay?" he says as he pulls one side of his headset back, and then he already hears changbin and jisung responding. "not--not you guys. hold on, i'll still be here--" he mutes his mic, and looks over to you. "babe?"
you curl in on yourself, frowning. "not really."
"you wanna talk about it?"
"you're busy--"
he shoves his headset down so it hangs around his neck. "i can multitask. once we're done with this, i'll stop, alright?"
you pout and he sees it from the corner of his eye. "i don't want to bother you."
"you aren't," he promises. "i'm listening."
"it's just... more of the same-old." you shift so you're a little closer to him. "feeling like some of my friends are closer with each other so i'm just kind of playing fifth wheel, platonically. other friends not listening to me when i speak meanwhile i feel like i file every little fact away..."
he's heard it before. he looks up, and he sees how upset you are, and he debates for a moment. he's going to play again with changbin and jisung this weekend... surely they can carry on without him? he pulls up his headset, unmutes, and says he's gotta go. all it takes is him mentioning your name for them to stop teasing him: felix wouldn't be ditching them if it weren't somewhat serious. he logs back out, and turns over, moving in to wrap his arms around you.
"hey." he smiles. "i love you. you wanna go out?" he says. "we can get dinner. talk more. maybe walk by the river?"
he knows you well: getting out helps. and walking by the river always helps you open up more. you peck his lips as you get up to find your shoes.
at least felix has your back when you need it the most.
#nonranghaes.thoughts#nonranghaes.skz#stray kids x you#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#stray kids imagine#lee felix x you#lee felix x reader#felix x you#felix x reader#you ever have friends who feel like theyre closer w /each other/#and you're just kinda... there?#yeah i left a friend thing tonight because i was tired of feeling like a fifth wheel#plus my other friend just kinda accidentally proved that she doesnt rly listen when i talk abt my interests#meanwhile i always try to engage her with her own and im like. oh right we had this problem before#and nothings changed bc i just deluded myself into thinking it did#i need a felix tbh i feel like he'd listen attentively to the ppl around him. chris too tbh.#very 'ur interests might not be my interests but i care about you so i'll listen'#nonranghaes.vent
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