#im reluctant to put tags on this one tbh

[hydrostalgia]

day 6

[cupidjyu]

be unprofessional

hyunjae x reader (request for the anon who wanted jealous!hyunjae thank uuu💕)

genre: jealousy, office au, president of company hyunjae, secretary reader, do u see what im trying to get at rn, bff kevin, an intern who gives me the ick, kissing, cuddling, secret? romance, flirt turned shy hyunjae, reader is the flirty one tbh notes: i fell asleep in the middle of writing this blame my period word count: 2.6k

“Y/n! Hey.” Kevin poked his head from the corner. You looked up from your computer with widened eyes.

“What’s up?” You grinned.

“There’s um– a new intern. I’m s’posed to show him around but I have a meeting,” He groaned. “I mean, I know Hyunjae’s the head president of the company and all. Important and stuff. But he’s also your boyfriend. Please tell him to stop swarming me with work.”

You snickered. “I can’t do anything about that. He’s the boss of you. And also me.” You glanced down at the pristine and shiny name tag on your desk. Secretary. It would have been severely unprofessional for the secretary and the president to be dating. But you initially weren’t dating. You simply had signed up for this job not knowing that you would fall in love with said president.

Now, it was some sort of game. Keeping your relationship secret and far from prying eyes. The only person who knew was Kevin because he had accidentally walked in on you two kissing behind the desk. It was half thrilling and half exhausting. Especially since Hyunjae’s always been a touchy man. If you ever so walked up to his desk to give him papers to sign, he would have his hands all over your waist, keeping you from going anywhere.

Kevin rolled his eyes and motioned to the door.

“Can you show the intern around though?” He pleaded. “Promise, I’ll buy you a drink tomorrow.”

You bit your lip, looking between him and your computer. It was flashing with the schedules that you were supposed to make for Hyunjae. But with the way Kevin looked at you so helplessly, you couldn’t help but sigh and get up from your desk.

“Fine. You owe me.”

He cheered and ran out the door. You wondered whether he even had a meeting to go to or if he had lied so he could go sing karaoke.

Fixing your hair and outfit, you opened the door. But you inhaled sharply when you came face to face with Hyunjae. This was what happened when his office was right next to yours. Like always, he looked handsome. But mostly he dressed the same. In those stupid, tailored suits that made his shoulders look incredibly broad.

“Hi!” You blurted out, smiling awkwardly.

He tilted his head with the corner of his lips lifting slightly. “Where are you going?”

“I should be asking why you’re here.” You raised an eyebrow. “Also, I’m going to be late.”

“Because,” He breathed out, leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. “I miss you. So tell me, why are you leaving me?”

You willed yourself not to blush. He told you that he missed you all the time yet you could never quite get used to it. “I’m not leaving you. I have to show an intern around.”

He frowned–cutely, dare you say. “I thought I told Kevin to do that.”

You shrugged. “Turns out he can’t. So bye.” You quickly slipped past him but you were stopped in your tracks when you felt an arm around your waist, pulling you right back. Hyunjae smiled softly down at you. 

“Are you avoiding me?” He teased.

“No,” You huffed. “You’re just annoying. Go back to work.”

“But I love you.” He pouted, looking at you with puppy-like eyes. It was an ironic contrast to his swept-up hair and very put-together appearance. “But fine. I’ll go. Whatever.”

You laughed as you finally pulled away, much to his reluctance. “I’ll see you later.” He hummed, waving you off.

–

“This is your… office, I think.” You motioned your hand to one of the empty desks. “Or that one?” You squinted at the other one. “I’m sorry. This isn’t my forte. My co-worker usually–”

“It’s okay.” The intern smiled. “I’d prefer you anyday.” You blinked when you realized that his smile had some other intention behind it.

“Oh,” You managed. “Thanks.”

He nodded. Wincing, you also came to the realization that his eyes were constantly wandering over you. Would now be the right time to tell him that you had a boyfriend? But what if he asked who? Then you would be in trouble.

So, you chose to stay quiet. In any other person’s eyes, it would be sensible to see that this new intern was handsome. He was tall, had sharp eyes, blah, blah. You didn’t really care much as you walked over to the break room.

“This is where you can come and take a break.” You smiled politely. “The coffee machine is always broken so don’t expect much.”

The man laughed. “You’re funny, did you know that? And cute.”

You let out a confused noise. “Ah– thank you?” Stepping away, since frankly, he had stepped closer to you, you headed out the door. “I’ll show you the… president’s office.” The man hummed, trailing behind you. A bit too close for your liking, but whatever, you told yourself. Just get this over with.

Once you arrived there, you peered through the window, only to realize that Hyunjae was nowhere to be seen. You sighed.

“He’s not there. I guess we’ll go somewhere else.”

“I know where we can go,” The intern replied. “There’s a cafe down the street. If you want, I can buy you a drink?”

You widened your eyes, taking a step backward. “I have a– uh…”

The intern watched you silently before he raised an eyebrow. “He isn’t here though, now is he?”

You clenched your jaw, at the fact that this guy was really implying that you should cheat. “Actually…”

His hand came up to your shoulder, probably to pull you closer. Except, his hand never quite landed there.

There was another hand that had wrapped around the intern’s wrist, stopping him. You could recognize it anywhere. The pretty, pretty hand that often cupped your jaw to pull you into a kiss. Hyunjae stepped forward, placing himself in between the two of you.

“What are you doing?” He muttered.

The intern visibly gulped as he backed up. “Nothing.”

You could only watch silently as Hyunjae approached him further, practically towering over him. So maybe the intern wasn’t so tall after all.

“Go,” He urged. “You’re particularly bold for someone who’s just started here.” Hyunjae’s voice was low and calm but you could see the way his hand blindly reached behind him to hold onto yours. You smiled slightly when you could feel his fingers wrapping around protectively.

The intern practically scrambled out the door, claiming he needed to use the bathroom. You hadn’t shown him where it was yet.

He’ll figure it out.

With a sigh, Hyunjae turned around. He looked you over with worried eyes.

Your gaze softened. “Hyunjae…”

He shook his head, glancing at the other workers. “There are people watching. I’ll talk to you later.”

You nodded slowly, stepping away.

For the rest of the day, you could barely focus on any of your tasks. Your heart was thumping as you constantly paused your typing to figure out if Hyunjae was angry at you or not. Glancing at the clock, you sighed. Two more hours.

–

After work was finished, the two of you headed home together. But unlike his usual talkative self, he was awfully quiet. The only thing that stayed the same was his hand that held tightly onto yours. Whenever you glanced at him, you noticed his pouted lips and furrowed eyebrows. But when you squeezed his hand tightly, you could see a shy smile grow on his lips. Stifling a laugh, that was what confirmed that he wasn’t mad at you particularly.

Once the door was unlocked and open, Hyunjae was immediately pulling off the outer layer of his suit. He closed the door behind him and you gasped quietly once you felt two warm hands grasp your waist, turning you around and pressing you up against the wood of the door.

Immediately, he was leaning in to press his lips against yours. This was unlike the soft kisses he liked to wake you up with. This kiss was fervent and heart-stopping. With muffled noises, you allowed him to kiss you intensely, his hands wandering all over your sides.

Slowly, at some point, when you had tugged at his hair, he slowed down, his lips moving unhurriedly and gently against yours. You began to smile, peeking an eye open to see just how adorably concentrated he was. Eyebrows furrowed, cheeks flushed pink, eyes squeezed shut, you found him very endearing.

When he had broke apart, he leaned in so that he could rest his forehead against yours, breathing slightly heavily.

“Don’t be like this,” You whispered with an amused lilt in your voice. 

“Like what?” He questioned. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You looked up at him with skepticism when you felt his hands still gripping your waist possessively.

“Jealous,” You teased. “You’re jealous.”

He grumbled, diving in to bury his nose into the slope of your neck. “I can’t help it.”

“But you are aware that I only love you, hm?” You grinned, placing your hands on his shoulders to make him face you. His ears were tinted red now, along with his cheeks.

“I know, but–”

“Come on,” You took his hand in yours, pulling him along. “Let’s go wash up.”

As the two of you were walking down the hallway, you couldn’t help but laugh to yourself. Hyunjae paused and looked at you with confusion.

“What’s funny?” He frowned.

“You know…” You leaned in, cupping his jaw with one hand. He looked down at you with slight surprise. “You’re kind of hot when you’re jealous.”

His surprised expression quickly turned into an embarrassed one. His eyes shut closed as he pulled you back in.

“Shut up,” He mumbled with adorably flushed cheeks. You were about to make another remark but he was quick to cut you off with another kiss. This one was so, so, sweet that it might have left your stomach full of butterflies.

“Still very hot,” You muttered, winking when he pulled away. He groaned exasperatedly and shut the bathroom door behind him.

–

When you entered your room, you found Hyunjae sitting in the middle of the bed, changed out of his work clothes. His hair was tousled and messy as he fiddled with his fingers.

With a fond smile, you sat cross-legged in front of him. You loved this side of him. The one that wasn’t the company president. Instead, it was the side that was just a man who was incredibly in love with you. He told you that every day without fail. He peered at you with sad eyes before looking back down at his lap.

With a light laugh, you lifted his chin with the tips of your fingers.

“Still feeling down?” You crooned.

He searched your eyes with so much affection behind them. And then he nodded quietly, his gaze wandering to your lips. Understanding his silent plea, you smiled before leaning forward to press a soft kiss to his. 

Instantly, he was pressing forward to deepen it, his hands coming to grasp you anywhere he could. You giggled, feeling ticklish from the way his fingers wandered over you. When he pulled away, he looked at you questioningly.

“Do you think he’s handsome?”

You smiled slyly an idea appearing in your head. You loved to tease him after all.

“Well, conventionally… he has the face.”

Hyunjae’s expression only fell even more at that, a frown appearing on his lips.

“But, I think you’re a hundred times more,” You whispered, pinching his cheek.

“More?”

“Handsome.” And then you shuffled forward. Without a warning, you cupped his face in your hands. Instinctively, he shut his eyes. With an amused huff, you leaned in to press a kiss on each of his eyelids. They fluttered open in surprise. “Your eyes are pretty. Like a deer’s.”

He smiles softly at that. But instead of stopping, you only leaned in again. This time, you kissed his cheeks. “And you’re cute when you’re blushing.” And right on cue, his cheeks flushed a slight pink. Moving onto the tip of his nose, you lingered there for a moment. He let out a confused noise. Slowly, very slowly, you moved down to his lips. 

Pressing your lips against his, your hand came to stroke his hair softly. 

“All of your features are perfect. So handsome,” You whispered. 

He was silent, staring at you with wide eyes. And then he whined, lunging forward to pull you into a hug. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” You laughed.

“Whatever you did.”

“Are you shy?”

He froze. And then nodded.

“If I told the rest of the office about this…”

“Don’t,” He blurted out, pulling away. That was when you registered that he was full-on blushing. Cheeks red, pupils dilated… You smiled, satisfied at the sight. "I'm going to get fired."

"What, for being shy? Not really a work matter is it?"

"For being in love with you."

Your heart skipped a beat. And then you laughed. "Ah... let them find out. You know, Sunwoo's been onto us for a while right?"

"He is?"

"Yeah," You snorted. "Because of that one day you pulled me into a closet to make out with me. You crumpled my collar. And you messed up my hair. And my neck was–"

"Okay, okay," He fumbled for words. "Fine, I'll be more professional." You eyed him with doubt.

Suddenly, he stood up and pulled out a hoodie. And then he made you wear it, much to your demise.

“So that everyone knows that you’re mine,” He stated.

You snorted, pulling him into bed and under the covers. “But there’s no one else here.”

“I don’t care,” He mumbled sleepily. His arms wrapped around you warmly and protectively. You felt your heart thump and thump as you gazed at his loving expression, his eyes soft and warm. And for a certain reason that had to do specifically with jealousy, he held you extra tight that evening.

“I would never want to lose you,” He had said before kissing you softly, again and again.

You smiled against his lips. Unable to verbally respond, you kissed back as if to tell him, "Me too."

–

The next day, you exited your office. And again, you almost rammed straight into Hyunjae. 

He looked down at you smugly. You rolled your eyes, knowing very well that he was much different at home.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked, cornering you back into your office. His hands came to the wall, caging you against the hard surface.

You looked at him unimpressed. “A meeting. Didn't you say you were going to be more professional?”

“But I miss you,” He leaned in, whispering into your ear. 

“I know you do. Is that why you were mumbling my name in your sleep last night?”

He froze, his eyes widening. “Did I?”

You nodded with a laugh.

“F-forget that,” He stuttered. “I miss you now.”

“Aw." You pouted mockingly. "But I have a meeting now.”

“Is it with that intern?”

You winced slightly and replied with a small "yes."

“Then don’t go,” He grumbled. And before you could protest, he was already pressing you up against the wall to kiss you harshly.

–

"I'm going to start with the presentation." Kevin walked in, esteemed and confident.

The intern furrowed his eyebrows with confusion. "Where's Y/n?"

Kevin turned on his computer casually. Though if someone were to look closely, they could see the knowing smile on his lips and the mischievous sparkle in his eyes.

"Busy."

[babbity-boo]

15 QUESTIONS

tagged by @generatorcat (thankuu lovely!! 🫶💖)

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYBODY?

nope! my name was picked bc it was easy to pronouce in both my mum and dad's native languages!

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

abt a week ago when me and my best friend went to see Frozen w/ a live chorus and orchestra LOL

3. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

no, thankuu

4. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

i don't think so, but sometimes here and there i guess ahaha

5. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?

i did both swimming/surf life saving and karate as a kid ahaha i liked swimming a lot tho and i kinda wanna pick it up again (but its so cold rn.. 🥶) also sometimes i run!

6. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT SOMEONE?

this is gonna make me sound soooooo superficial but to be completely honest, its hair and make up...... probably bc i, myself, put a lot of time and effort in my own hair and make up and its always something i like getting complimented on (lol) so i just naturally gravitate towards it 😐 but i never ever judge ppl on how they style their hair/make up or if they don't wear any at all!! its just an interest of mine (and maybe some internalised misogyny i need to work through? idk lol) ((but sometimes its nice bc i can usually notice when someone gets a haircut even if its just a trim so i can easily compliment them on it even if they dont say anything!))

7. EYE COLOUR?

brown!

8. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

i seriously cant choose, so both! i love spooky bloody things and i love cheesy corny things too ahahaha

9. ANY SPECIAL TALENTS?

not really! ive yet to discover any.. but thats ok i have my whole life time to 😆

10. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

in a hospital

11. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

reluctant to list drawing as a hobby since i havent drawn anything for fun lately 🥲 but i like eating a lot and trying new desserts, reading, wikipedia deep dives, window shopping, just wandering aimlessly around in places like the city or just my neighbourhood, tbh i dont do a lot ahaha

12. DO YOU HAVE PETS?

no, but i think id like one in like a decade or two when ive got my shit together and have figured myself out ahaha

13. HOW TALL ARE YOU?

161 cm

14. FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?

english and studio arts!

15. DREAM JOB?

i’ve never really had one, i think i used to dream of being an antique bookshop owner when i was younger ahaha but im trying to make something of a dream job through tattooing! i really enjoy it rn but it does get hard and overwhelming

tagging: @tiredbon @mawziee @amarkls @rolypolies ! (please dont feel pressured to do this lol)

[michpat6]

word search tag game!

I've been tagged by the wonderful @wanderingnightingale to participate in the word search tag game! my words are adore, betrayal, grin, water, and sword

turns out I don't have "adore" in any of my fics, which is weird tbh, but I guess that's a new goal for myself haha

for "betrayal", here's a bit from the fi rights! manifesto "your obedient servant", a second person pov character study on fi:

In the second fragment, simultaneously, you are never pulled from your pedestal in the Temple of Time. The Hero of Time warns the young Princess Zelda of Ganondorf's betrayal, and the Demon King is banished after a failed execution.

for "grin", I've used it a lot in all of my fics, so here are some of my favorites!

from my zelink amnesia fic, "that parting need not last forever (it's dangerous to go alone":

“Link!” she yells at him, on her hands and knees and glaring down at him with a wild, panicked anger in her green eyes. “Are you trying to give me a heart attack?” Cheeky, Link grins up at her. “I can just put you back in the Shrine of Resurrection if that happens, right?”

from my urbosa/zelda's mom fic "lightning in a bottle (flashing before my eyes)":

“Hello,” she straightens when she notices Urbosa standing there, taking the tube out of her mouth. It smokes between her slender fingers, and Urbosa spots calluses on her fingertips. “Are you lost?” “I think so, yes,” Urbosa nods, playing with the ends of her long red hair that’s been intricately braided. “I, um, I got distracted by all of the paintings.” The girl’s lips, painted red, spread into a slow grin. “That usually happens whenever someone sees the Great Hall for the first time. What’s your name?” Urbosa’s heart trips in her chest at the sight of her smile. She manages, “Urbosa.”

and finally from my baby "aftermath":

It gives her an ugly grin. “Courage need not be remembered, for it is never forgotten.”

for water, I'm pulling from my attack on titan/eremika fic "this world is cruel (but you are so beautiful)":

“Nothing, sleepyhead,” Sasha grabs her arm and pulls her to her feet. “Come on, I gotta show you something Commander Hange found in the water! You coming, Eren?” Mikasa, rumpled from sleep, glances back at Eren with a question on her face. The ends of her scarf flail in the salty breeze, and he catches sight of his messed up stitch in the sunlight.  He swallows before pushing himself out of the sand, and he’d give a reluctant, “Sure,” again and again just to watch the way Mikasa smiles at him with sun-kissed cheeks.  

finally, for sword, I'm pulling from my zelda, fi, and wolf link road trip fic "as the sun sets on this world":

I cannot feel the air, Princess Zelda. “Oh,” she sniffs again, closing her eyes. She’s so, so tired. “What can you feel?” You. My Master. The loss of him.  “You’re the same Master Sword as in all of the legends, right? You were there for the first Calamity?” I am. I was. There is only one me. “Have…Has something like this ever happened, before? Has the Hero ever…?” Another rumble of thunder. Her ears ring, and it sounds so much like the screeching of a Guardian’s laser that she has to check and make sure she’s still alone. No, The Master Sword finally answers, quiet. Not in this version of the story.

and that's it! im not sure who else to tag, honestly, so if you end up seeing this post and want to play along tag me and go for it! either use these same words or make up your own!

[rosesanthology]

Escape Plan | Matsukawa Issei x F!Reader [mafia!AU]

This took me SO MUCH TIME to write aaaaaah it's not surprising that it's so long :0 i just have many many feelings for Matsukawa Issei ALSO im begging y'all to listen to the playlist before/as you read please !!

Im kinda pissed that i cant add a "read more" option since im on mobile tho :\

(Also ngl at first i planned to get one of the 2 shot but i didn't have the heart to go thru with it)

Warnings : Fluff, it starts with humor but at some point it gets angsty ???? Idk y'all tell me

- Au that could be considered as a ennemies-to-lovers type of situation

[Tags] : @raevaioli and @haikoo like i cannot stress this enough @haikoo this your main manz

- if you could only use one sentence to describe your job to a Karen it would be : stealing from the rich in order to trick other rich people

- you had been what the people would call a spy for most of your life now, the Tokyo based Nekoma Organisation being something close to a family

- you worked with both of your very good friends, Kuroo Testurou and Kozume Kenma

- Kuroo, the leader of your little squad, had been the first one to open up to you when you joined

- he was a gifted chemistry genius and you were sure he could make any poison or soporific out of the most random stuff

- he also had insane combat and physical abilities which made him fit to act in a lab as well as on mission grounds

- Kenma was a little more reserved at first, he was the same age as you but still was really reluctant to accept you as one of his own at first

- when he saw how much Kuroo trusted you and how interested you were in his work he slowly but surely found himself caring for you

- to put it simply Kenma, better known as "apple pi" was a hacker. His job ranged from creating computer viruses to full on enabling the security of whole museums

- despite his cute appearance and shy demeanor he was probably the scariest of you three

- finally, you Y/L L/N was the infiltration and weapons expert of the group, you could weild literally anything from guns, to swords to,,,,,metal rods (but you don't wanna talk about this one) and you were of great help when deciding which infiltration angle was the best in missions

- Kuroo, under the orders of Boss Nekomata, quickly taught you the dangers and ways of the job during your first months working with them, the organisation specializing in outsmarting rich bastards and stealing their precious ressources in order to make "better use of them"

- if they were hoarding a particularly efficient brand of medicine, your goal was to steal it all, and sell it to people in need for free or a low price

- if they were in possession of some important object like let's say,,,,,the construction plans for the emperor's new vacation house, you stole it, made copies to sell at a high price to the highest bidder and your good affiliate, the Fukurodani Corporation would keep an eye on the original as part of their personnal collection, you were fine with that

- yeah they were others organisations like that in Tokyo, your friends from the Fukurodani Corp of course but also the Shiratorizawa elite crime group with who you had worked a couple times before

- ah and there was the Yakuzas too....honestly they were the only group in Tokyo with whom you were still on dangerous terms with

- they didn't like Nekoma in their affairs and you didn't like them in yours, but you tolerated each other

- your boss had established a truce with the representant of the big Yakuza group of your area, Kondo "the viper" Takara, a truly scary woman who had blasted her way to the one of the top positions of the hierarchy

- she even had a cool nickname ヾ(｀ε´)ノ

- but you knew better than to mess with them

- all in all y'all kept doing your jobs well, not bothering anybody

- except for one remaining rivalry with some Miyagi group

- the Aoba Johsai Institution.

- well, rivalry would be a strong word because you kinda got along with that Iwaizumi guy, he was a great hand to hand combat fighter and you respected that

- the others however ? Trash. 👁3👁

- they seem to act like Tokyo will be their territory in the next 5 seconds flat like ??

- THEY DON'T EVEN GO THERE ????

- "they be acting like they can just swoop in and eat OUR rich" you had told Kuroo and Kenma one day over ramen

- spoiler alert : it was a bad idea cause Kuroo snorted and almost made the noodles go up his nose

- no but seriously they always seemed to take advantage of YOUR missions to attract attention

- how did they even know which missions you were on anyway ??? (Kenma and Kunimi are actually good friends cause they play video games together but he'd never tell you that)

- it's like that one time you infiltrated a business company's heir's residence and then you came across a dude named Hanamaki and you had the HARDEST time whisper shouting to him how blowing up the whole place was a bad idea to retrieve one (1) diamond

- at the end you felt so tired that you gave it to him anyway ಥ_ಥ ("just take it ffs" "really ??" "Don't make me regret this")

- they also had the single worst person ever on one of their teams.

- Matsukawa Issei

- just thinking about it made you want to take your metal bat and break something in your shared room with your two other friends

- seriously that guy was like the epitome of clownery

- he's also supposed to be his team's gun expert except that's not the best task for someone who refuses to take anything with him but his freaking FISTS

- the first time you had met y'all ended up being on the same case to assassinate some guy who had kidnapped some cute freckled kid from a place in Miyagi called Karasuno

- EXCEPT HE WAS IN TOKYO SO IT WAS YOUR DUTY !!! NOT HIS !!!!

- you had Kenma on the earbud telling you about the guy's position in the club you were currently one street away from. You were posted on the rooftop of a building with a sniper rifle ready to get done with it and go save the kid but GUESS WHO COMES IN FISTS SWINGING WHEN YOU LITERALLY HAD THE TARGET IN SIGHT

- and he had the nerve to look straight toward your rifle's aim and flip you off while smirking

- sir you're about to catch these hands🚶🏽

- he had knocked him out alright and he got the young boy out but you were NOT ready to let that slide so you quickly got down and crossed path with him at the back exit of the club

- "what exactly do you think you were doing in there ?" Listen. You may have sounded confident enough saying that but you had NO idea that this dude was like a whole ass giraffe

- and he knew he was tall so he had the audacity to say

- "sorry can't hear you so well from down there midget, i was just doing my job (▰˘◡˘▰)" if it weren't for the karasuno boy being right there you would have stabbed his kneecaps on sight

- anyway after that y'all just seemed to run into each other wayyyy too often

- insults were shared just as often tho

- "well butter my buns and call me betty broker if it isn't my sweet little midget shooting people !"

- "stfu before i choke you"

- "kinky but can you reach my neck ?"

- "you've sunk low enough"

-so yeah f u n  t i m e s

- aside from that, business was going great but Kuroo had had news of a very important mission for you but he insisted on letting Boss Nekomata tell you about it himself for some reason

- he'd never done that :(

- you were kinda hurt that your best friend was hiding stuff from you tbh :(

- and Kenma did not seem to know more than you for now

- so you spent a whole week just mopping around

- sometimes you would go and poke fun and the newbie Lev Haiba but it wasn't the same

- Kuroo and Kenma kept working on missions while you were left waiting for that one assignment that Nekomata seemed to keep you for

- until today when Kuroo finally told you that the boss was requesting you in his office

- ngl you were EXCITED

- maybe you would have to zipline down the Tokyo tower (σ≧▽≦)σ maybe he was going to let you take a chainsaw with you this time (σ≧▽≦)σ

- maybe he- "oh" you deadpanned, stepping foot into the office and seeing none other than your arch nemesis, Matsukawa Issei in all his pisces clown glory

- "why tf are you there shitty eyebrows"

- "i had a good day too Y/N ! thanks for asking :D" today was the day. You were 100% ready to kill him and the knife that was attached to your thigh strap seemed like such a good option rn-

- "stop it you two. Y/N take a sit" Nekomata gestured, as you didn't hesitate to listen to your superior even fully aware of Mattsun's eyes annoyingly following your every movement

-"Okay so. Y/N i know you may be wondering why Matsukawa's here but to put it simply we've been informed that a rich family have gotten their hands on one of Aoba Johsai's rarest item : a gold engraved katana that belonged to their first boss"

- "so what do you need us for ?" You didn't mean to use "us" but you knew better than to piss off your boss, he was like a parental figure come on

- "i need you guys to infiltrate an auction held by said family and steal it back in the span of one week. It's up to you to work together or not but keep in mind that our arrangement states that we're autorised to make copies of the katana for future sells."

- you guys nodded, after all you were professionnals before everything and you were about to leave when Nekomata put something on the table

- "here are the keys to your appartment near the auction site it'll be your hideout !"

-.....now this had to be a cruel joke-

- "id rather sleep under a bridge then live with her for a whole week"

- "wow this is the first time we agree on something Mattsun" the oh so familiar nickname dripped in venom as you said it, unsure of what was supposed to happen

- "oh yes you could but i suppose that you don't have the supplies and tools that you will definitely need during that mission :)"

- you locked eyes with the brunette for a minute before reluctantly stomping to the table and grabbing hold of the keys and adress written on a paper, storming out of the door,  letting out a loose "come on shitty eyebrows we have data to collect" to your new....partner ? Ugh it was about to be a long week

-  it turns out the appartment was a lot smaller than you hoped for, with two single person beds, a computer post and different storing purposed furniture

- it was a common thing however, because the last thing an undercover spy would want is to draw attention with a flashy hideout

- the first step was to gather information on who would be at the auction which shouldnt be too hard

- "hey ill take the lead and contact my friend so that he can determine who is going to be here" you said as you sat on the chair in front of the computer

- "mm yeah you do that ill check what kind of weapons have been provided to us" Mattsun had no difficulty finding them as the drawers well full of them....this was very promising

- Kenma had just sent you the list of people that had been invited to the event, and you recognised many names as being members of the powerful Yakuza group lead by Konda Takara, of course.....the infamous viper herself

- you called out to Mattsun to show him and briefly explained what they were up too and how they usually fonctionned

- the auction was to take place the last 3 days after an opening party, leaving the rest of the week for preparations

- they usually took their time in comitting their crimes so you thought that stopping them mid plan by taking advantage of it was the best way to get the sword

- Mattsun didn't have anything to say for the moment, seemingly thoughtful about the whole situation

- "just so you know" you started, already regretting the decision of talking in your head, "i don't plan on being friends with you anytime soon but i feel like for this we should at least try not to rip each other's hair out"

- "i never planned on that second option"

- "huh ?"

- "i hope you know that we've never had a single conversation without insults of some kind before so for the sake of both of us it would be better to actually get to know each other since we're supposed to work together"

- you hated to admit it

- but he was right

- however you didn't comment on it, opting for throwing him a dry "let's sleep" before plopping yourself on your own bed on the other side of the room

- this is about to be one hell of a week

-3 days had passed in the crammed appartement both you and Mattsun struggling to inform yourself on each specific individual that was going to be present at the auction

- right now, you were both sitting on the floor, wearing simple oversized shirts and pyjama pants and shorts, cheese pizza box laying on top of the document covered surface

- "Mattsun, pass me the paper about Okuda Takeda please" :000

- Matsukawa froze, because he knew that in 2 days of living together y'all had establised that you wouldn't be at each other's throats

- but hearing you using his nickname unironically and saying please ???? That was still something he had to get used to

- "what are you staring at ? Give me the paper shitty eyebrows >:[" ah there she was

- "thats my girl" he thought, handing you the document and resuming his own reading

- here's the catch : Mattsun was head over heels in love with you since like day 1 that Hanamaki told him about this pretty girl who let him take the diamond from his mission. He tried to repress his feelings as he had noticed that you seemed way closer with your friend Kuroo who he had seen on missions with you

- maybe you liked him

- he would understand, he seemed way more confident than him and he was also probably way smarter since he was a genius and all

- also the way you were always soft to him and not Matsukawa kinda got to him

- he wanted you to hug HIM after a mission too and NOT insult him

- but he judged it for the better as he still got to be close to you in his own way with the playful fights you always seemed to pick with him

- it was easier than confronting his feelings or rejection

- this mission proved to make things so much harder for him tho

- like yeah he saw you being a badass plenty of other times but now ?

- he got to see you being all clingy and grumpy in the morning (he never knew being called a dumbass while you were falling back asleep on his shoulder was his thing but hey) , got to see your nose scrunch up when you were focusing on mapping out the position of the vent system of the venue

- he could go on for hours about how much he loved you and your plan was not making it easy.....profiting off the yakuzas' plan took way too much waiting and he understood that you wanted it to go as well as possible but he just couldn't keep living like this until then

- it felt like torture

- and he did not want to see you in that gorgeous dress that you were supposed to wear at the auction during the infiltration

- he knew that a couple more days could drive him crazy and make him do dumb shit like kissing you

- he had thought about that a lot of times but never brought himself to do it because je knew it was pointless

- he had to take action now

- the night of the opening ceremony, the day before the Yakuzas would start their scheme

- both of you were laying in your beds, awake, that was a habit you had developped over the past nights, you were just, aware of each other's presence and then sometime you would ask him something about his life, his friends, himself

- it made his heart beat too fast everytime and he could feel himself falling even more by the second when he heard you giggling talking about the time you pulled a prank on your friend Yaku with Kuroo

- he knew that you were already very sleepy from the way you were slurring your words

- "Y/N do you hate me ?" He said, abruptly and he heard a strangled laugh coming from you followed up by the question

- "what's that for dummy ?"

- "please answer" he asked in a whisper, sounding almost desperate

- you took a second to think about it

-you had grown quite close to your tall partner in such a short period of time, even letting your guard down and stopping from being so defensive

- "i don't hate you....i could never" you said the last part more to yourself tho but Matsukawa didn't miss it, he wished he did as he heard the soft sighs coming from your now sleeping form

- his heart ached as he got up, putting on his black coat over his mathing turtleneck shirt, taking his gun and spare map of the auction venue

- you were totally going to hate him now....

- and then he left for the opening party

- the rain was pouring outside

- for some reason you couldn't sleep well that night

- that only happened whenever Kuroo was out on a mission at night or Kenma was working in his office

- you hated sleeping alone, you couldn't do it

- being alone was the one thing you dreaded the most in your life, death was nothing if nobody knew where you were, if nobody aknowledged your existence you weren't alive

- but Mattsun was there and you trusted him.

- yeah you were kind of an ass to him during like 90% of your interactions with him but you just didn't know how to talk to him ??? He was so strong and good at what he did so you couldn't help but feel admiration but also intimidation

- yet you've felt probably more comfortable with him than anyone in your life (yes even Kuroo and Kenma weirdly enough)

- it was a nice feeling

- maybe it was because you saw him differently than them...

- but anyway

- you felt like yourself around him

- and yet

- why couldn't you sleep ?

- "Mattsun ?" You called out to him, voice cracked from not having used it for a while

- no answer

- maybe he didn't hear you over the rain....?

- you had a bad feeling about this

- "Mattsun ?" You called out a little louder, sitting up

- yep definitely

- you turned on the light and to your surprise, Matsukawa was nowhere in sight

- your heart sunk at the realization

- you were alone

- what about the plan ? Ah its true that he never said anything about it

- did he not trust you enough with it ? Did he think you were too assertive ?

- you wanted to cry but it seemed as if your brain wasn't working, your body rushing on its own to check the date and time on your phone : past 10pm on thursday night.....

- the opening party !

- "shit shit shit he must have gone there to take them by surprise wtf is he thinking doing this alone?" You thought aloud, maybe it would trick your body into not being scared

- at this point you were terrified, rushing to get the red dress on as well as putting your 2 guns under each of your thigh straps

- is he alone ? Surrounded by highly trained and dangerous Yakuzas ? What if....you were too late ?

- you didn't have time to think too much about it as you knew that this kind of thoughts led nowhere.

- you had to infiltrate that party the fastest you've ever done in your life and see for yourself, luckily, the venue was only a few crossroads away from your appartment

- truth was Mattsun's plan was not so bad

- after all you had insisted on making him find info on every staff member there too so it's thanks to you if he just so happened to know what type of guy that one waitress liked in order to flirt with her and convince her that he had forgotten his watch in one of the closed off aeras of the venue

- the place was absolutly gigantic, after all it was a mansion bought will illegal money

- he hated this, he just wanted to get it over with, retrieve the sword, gtfo and go back to Miyagi forever so that he wouldn't feel the pain of the illusion of being by your side when you were clearly far ahead of him

- you'd always been anyway

- he had finally reached the generator room and opened the vents with much difficulty as the room was a mess of cardboard boxes and storage shelves

- he was just going to cut the power, which would take about 15 minutes to get back, allowing him to go thru the vents to the main hall that was right thru the wall to his side, retrieve the sword and just make a run for it

- hopefully the rain would cover most of the sound he made so that was even better

- see that would have been great if he hadn't felt the icy cold metal of a gun at the nape of his neck as he was fiddling with the generator

- he had been caught.

- it was the end.

- shit he fucked the whole mission over and now even you didn't have a chance to-

- "what exactly do you think you're doing Mattsun ?" You said coldly even tho the hurt in your tone didnt go unnoticed by the taller man

- "haha Y/N whatchu doing here on this fine night ? You look stunning btw"

- "Cut the crap shitty eyebrows i asked you a question"

- you finally lowered your gun allowing your harsh glare to show how upset you truly were

- damn, Matsukawa really felt shitty :\

- he'd never seen you like that- well not soaked from the rain but....so vulnerable to him

- all your feelings talks happened in the dark of night in your hideout, he'd never seen your face look so pained before

- "I did what was best for both us..."

- "bullshit." He wasn't sure that he believed himself either to be honest

- "what the fuck are you even doing anyway ? I thought you and i were in this mission together ?? Did nothing matter to you ? I finally think that i found someone who i could trust other than my fucking family and that's what you do ? Ditch me for your own profit ?? You did what was best for your damn self Matsukawa"

- you were upset. He got it really, his insecurities had gotten the best of him like they often did....except he didn't have the strength to confront them, to confront you about it. So he got it and he didn't retaliate.

- "so what ?? You're not even going to say anything ?? Not even TRY to fucking apologize ? Do you really don't care ?" You searched for his eyes, but little did you know that he just....couldn't talk nor maintain eye contact with you right now

- "Mattsun...i thought you and i had...something ? I don't know maybe i hallucinated or some shit but i thought we were at least friends you know ? D-did you ever tolerate me at all ?"

- your voice cracked, it got lower and it cracked, and at that moment he was sure his heart broke right at this instant too

- he wanted to tell you that that was the farthest thing from the truth

- he wanted to tell you that he loved you

- but you were too far. Once again, you were miles ahead of him, more than ever

- and the sound of voices coming from the corridor did NOT HELP

- you could not afford being found here so with the professionalism left in you, you pushed your feelings away and pulled Mattsun behind a shelf, crouching and waiting

- you were so close he could feel you shivering from the cold and he felt so so bad

- but now was not really the moment

- "didn't you hear shouting ?" Shit. Maybe you should have waited until getting out of here for your heart to heart because this guard was definitely not trippin

- there were 2, luckily they didn't have the idea to split up to search the room, all you had to do was move low and close to the walls in order reach the door and well....the katana literally could not matter less to any of y'all rn

- at this moment you really regretted going out in such a hurry completly forgetting to contact Kenma, he could have hacked into the camera system and told you were they were so easily.....

- anyway, despite that you guys were stealthy enough to get out if the room

- now the problem was getting out of here.....

- you held Mattsun's wrist loosely as you ran thru the corridor of the building, thunder raging and labored breathing filling the silence

- "Y/N we could get out from the rooftop !" Right....if you could only get there then maybe you could just parcour your way out of this by getting on other rooftops....damn you were glad Matsukawa always thought of every escape plan possible

- you didn't really mean what you said earlier

- yes, you were disappointed but, you were also scared for his dumbass

- and rn may not be the best moment to realize it as you were most likely in a life of death situation but....you loved him

- fuck you loved him so much that you were running in a goddamn dress right now

- "i truly hoped it wasn't you" said a voice from the end of the lobby

- of course it just had to be the Yakuza boss you dreaded so much

- Kondo was just standing there, arms crossed but you knew better than to take her lightly

- "did you come to retrieve it ?" Its funny how her voice seemed to dominate even the full on storm outside, the occasional lightning bolt shining light from the huge windows into the corridor

- "No....let us pass please we just want to leave" Mattsun felt how tensed you were and immediatly rested his hand on his gun handle under his coat

- "yeah sure sweetheart but only if you tell your guard dog to calm down unless he wants me to cut his fingers clean off" she threatened nonchalantly as her hand met the handle of her own katana strapped to her belt

- Matsukawa was deadass glaring at her so hard you didn't recognise him

- he honestly looked like he could take her on but...you didn't feel like testing this theory tonight

- "hey hey, it's alright" you soothed him, putting your hand on his arm and squeezing slightly

- it seemed to work because he quickly let go of his gun even tho he was still glaring

- "let us go" he said firmly

- she pushed herself out of the way and motionned with her arm as if to say "go on~" in the most theatrical way

- you passed her without issues and soon found yourself on the roofs as planned in Mattsun's escape route and made it safely to the streets, rain still pouring

- you were finally letting out a breathe you didn't know you were holding all this time

- you were alive and most importantly, so was he

- you turned around and were ready to say something when he cut you off by grabbing your arms and pulling you into a kiss

- it was short but it managed to get his point across very well as well as warm you up when he wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his forehead against yours

- "i love you Y/N....i swear i didn't mean to hurt you and put you in danger like that....if i knew i would have done things differently i-"

- "i love you too Mattsun and it's never been a problem to me, i've done way more dangerous things in my life than rescue my boyfriend from getting killed dummy"

- in the end, you weren't alone

- somehow he had become, your escape plan from it

[art-by-rozzai]

had a bad day so more band au headcannons

anyone who wants to write a fic for this is absolutely allowed if they tag me, i’m not gonna make any full length ones but i might post some one shots eventually

anyway i had a really shitty day so here’s me self projecting and creating more band headcannons

check out the first here~

check out the second here~

tag list~

@athenashipsthings @thelesbianspoon @flowersheep @insert--self--hatred @nafsbluebery @sunflowerss0 @nerdiegurlie @stars-and-rose

okays lets do this✨

so last when we left the boys, it’s the day before they release their album “death of a bachelor”

to celebrate, roman suggests they get dinner out and maybe go see a movie??

logan is suprisingly the first to agree, saying that if he doesn’t get to watch the “scary stories to tell in the dark” movie soon he will explode. plus there’s no food in the fridge

virgil is also down to go see the movie, but is more reluctant to get dinner. he hates formal things, so to make him feel more comfortable roman offers they go to the local diner that he knows has virgil’s favorite chicken parm dish and virgil can’t say no to that

patton doesn’t want to see the movie at first-he really doesn’t like scary movies. but he wants dinner with his friends and he might be able to latch onto logan during the scary parts so he goes with it

so patton offers go help virgil with his hair and they end up getting ready together! they talk about everything they can think of as patton does hair and virgil does makeup and they both do each other’s nails and then they’re ready to go out whooooppp

meanwhile roman collapsed on logan’s bed an hour ago and began complaining about how he needed to impress virgil to get him to fall in love with him and has been talking ever since

logan doesn’t mind tho, roman helps him pick out a nice outfit and gives tips on how to woo patt

even though it’s not a date

yet

anyways they get to the diner and they all have an incredible time! by the end of the meal they’re in tears laughing at each other, from roman’s hysterical stories to virgil’s banter to logan’s fun facts and spilt tea to patton’s enthusiastic impressions

they love each over like family :)

and the movie is top notch. virgil is in love with it, him and logan spend the whole time guessing what’s going to happen while roman hides behind virgil and patton shoves his face full of popcorn and squish himself into logan’s arm

and yes virgil can’t stop laughing and logan’s immediate tensing up and blushing

after the movie they just don’t want to go to bed quite yet, so the friends head to the park and enjoy lying in the grass, talking and letting logan point out the stars while roman makes up stories of the aliens and space princesses that protect the galaxy

virgil makes everyone his famous hot chocolate and they stay up until midnight to release their songs

and then the clock strikes 12 and death of a bachelor is available to download

the boys decide that staying up and watching the comments flood in is a terrible idea and instead they put on some disney films and fall asleep on the couch

it’s nice

they wake up to millions of notifications

everyone is freaking the fuck out

this album ??? is beautiful ???

all of the fans are in love but also have a lot of questions-so the fab four start doing monthly live-streams to just chat and answer questions and catch up with their fans

“are y’all single?”

um

well yes

but uh

this question is not goOD ROMAN WHAT THE FU-

anyway virgil comes to patton one day, slams the door, puts his face in a pillow and screams “PATT IM SO GAY HELP”

because roman called his hair pretty this morning and yes it’s stupid and it happens all the time but this time was different

don’t worry tho they won’t admit their feelings to one and other for another three months

death of a bachelor does really well-all of the songs end up going either gold or platinum

their song “victorious” is played on the radio all of the time

so november rolls around and the friends decide it’s time to go on tour! starting with just north america, they post a video on the youtube channel that gives all the locations and dates

it’s to start in april:

virgil is extremely nervous. being on the road for so long and preforming live in front of thousands of people and will anyone even show up and-

logan is slightly nervous but honestly he really enjoys preforming-once he ties the tie around his head like a bandanna he almost transforms into the punk rock bassist he is known by the fans to be

patton!!! is!!! bouncy!!!!!!!! he wants to meet all these people!!!! and he can’t wait to give back to all of them by preforming and meet and greets and social interaction makes him really happy!!

roman is so excited-preforming is his thing. when he’s on a stage, he’s in his element! he can’t wait to show off and travel and be with his friends for even longer :)

but they can’t go on tour with their boring old instruments sooooo

roman and patton team up to paint and decorate all of the instruments

virgil’s piano matches his jacket, lots of purple and swirls and patton paints the classic nightmare before christmas scene on the front (u know, this one but stationary)

and they decorate the microphone stand purple and silver and black

logan gets a dope space themed bass-the outside is dark blue and the inside is painted like a galaxy, with a plain silver pick

roman paints his gutair with a castle and sunset in the back, with a bright red pick to play

patton’s drums have clouds on them nowww like a sunny day with blue puffy clouds

they’re ready to go! but it’s still only december so u kNoW whAt ThaT mEaNs

CHRISTMAS!!!!!

since none of the squad are jewish, (although technically patton is half jew since his mom is, but he just really loves christmas and always celebrated that growing up so)

they decide to celebrate at their house

they invite all of their close family to the apartment and have a lovely dinner

and yeah virgil doesn’t invite anyone cuz he was adopted by a shitty family who he doesn’t talk to anymore, bcuz all they did was try and get money out of him

and yeah he has a panic attack when all of his best friends are excitedly talking about their family coming over

and y e a h roman helps him calm down and swears that he will always b there to protect virgil bcuz he’s never met anyone quite like him and it’s not easy to explain but he just wants virgil to know he’s safe with roman

and yeah virgil wishes he could stop falling for roman but the ground keeps disappearing beneath him

so time skip a bit closer to christmas and logan bursts into romans room with an idea

“i can rap”

“we know”

“you can rap”

“kind of but okay”

“christmas rap song for fun”

“yeS”

so they write “gonna kill santa claus” (look it up) and decide to post it on the youtube channel on christmas eve

they film a music video for it where they jokingly set up different traps for santa like poison cookies and fire cracker chimneys and more

virgil sings the chorus, logan raps the rap parts, roman does the bridge, and patton lays down a pretty sick beat

it comes out really nice and honestly really fucking funny

so after a delightful family dinner with everyone over, the friends release that video and the internet fucking dies it’s so funny and logan can rap (??????) and ohmygod all of them are so cute what the fuck

anyway back to christmas dinner

roman has like 6 little sisters, and his mom and dad and papa and nana over

(he’s latino, his mom and dad are both from the dominican republic)

patton invites his mom and dad and little brothers, thomas and dee

and logan invites his two moms

everyone comes over for lunch and gets along reallyyyyyy well

logan’s got the punk mom and soft mom dynamic whereas, patton’s family is all super kind and like homey and boisterous and romans family is wild and crazy and funny and they all instantly click

presents are passed around, lots of money and books and movies and stickers and jewelry

really sweet stuff

and then everyone goes home and the friends have their own little gift exchange

virgil got logan the stephen king book “insomnia” and a (sort of) joke blanket with benedict cumberbatch’s face on it that he can use when he goes stargazing at night

logan gets virgil some noise cancelling headphones and a framed picture of a wedding with virgil’s face cropped on one and gerard ways face on the other

they both can’t stop laughing at the fact they attacked each other’s celeb crush

virgil gets patton a cute little cat stuffed animal that when u push the hand it’s a recording of all of them saying “we love you!!!” and a really sweet card

patton gets virgil a eyore necklace that was super expensive but matches patton’s winnie the pooh one and a itunes card for him to buy more music (and yes a really sweet card)

virgil gets roman two tickets to see mean girls on broadway and a framed picture of the two of them

yeah roman tears up a bit fuck u

roman gets virgil a collage of him and roman and a handmade hoodie that virgil is never going to take off oh and also meet and greet passes to see dan and phil at their interactive introverts tour

and maybe virge gets a little teary too

roman gets patton a recipie book and an apron that says “you BAKE my day”

patton gets roman a new ukelele and a printed out pamphlete of theatre song chords that he can play

roman gets logan the sherlock script and an empty box just to fuck with him

logan gets roman the entire grimm fairytale series and tapes a note to the front that says “bcuz u are an illiterate fool😜”

patton gets logan a phone case with the stars that were out on the day they met, hand painted framed picture of him and logan, and comic con tickets for this spring

logan gets patton tickets to the art museum downtown, a gift card to the coffee shop next to it, and two gold hoop earrings with a note that says “next week, friday at 7. it’s a date ;)”

so christmas is pretty good for all :))))))

and that’s the end of this one i’ll make a part four soon lmao

[fmddevin]

take care of me: daein’s story of fear.

scenario: so this is about the very first time daein tripped on acid & also his first bad trip. so....you could say he was pretty scared. big reason he doesn’t do lsd much. word count: 2,200 😳 notes: please know this isn’t saying if you get high you’re the same as very stupid kim daein. this is just his experience where tbh, a lot contributed to his bad trip. just please be safe & smart ok!!!!!!! and also, he’s dumb, especially in this phase of his life, and says/does some dumb things!! they don’t reflect my views. in fact...i cringed writing 98% of this. but also! if things like drugs & overdose and anything else in the tags make you uncomfy, please don’t read this...it might bother you! there’s also quite a bit of cursing. and i hate this & it’s not good AT ALL but i’m running out of time so i have to post it. anyways that’s all, ily all <3)

everything started off fine.

everything started off perfectly fine, and that was the scariest part.

there he was, in the center of the room, staring down a girl with her friends on the other side of the room.  he was still too sober, too bored, and was wondering where a few drinks could land him by the end of the night. truth be told, the usual routines were getting to be repetitive - get drunk, find a girl, land in bed by 3am, kick her out before his parents woke him up in the morning. but that was becoming a little too predictable, and tonight daein was craving a change of pace. he’d even gotten their early, thinking that getting there at the start of the party would hype him up. he only intense disappointment of a near empty room, not yet at it’s peak.

“you don’t look like you’re having much fun.”

huh? he can’t tell if he said it out loud over the blaring music, but from his furrowed eyebrows he’ sure the girl in front of him can sense his confusion. he scans her over, but nothing’s coming to him. no name, no potential friends - hell, did she even live here? because he swears he’s never seen her before, and if he did he would’ve tried talking to her a long time ago. “i mean - i guess. i might dip - party’s kinda dead, you know?”

she takes a step closer, and her unexpected proximity almost causes him to step back. “or maybe you’re just dead. what’s your name? i might be able to help you out,” she offers, gesturing across the room. shit. she wanted him that quick? that was a record, and he’s already getting himself ready to go before she turns around to him. 

“i have a friend here, he’s probably got something that’ll make you have some fun. i’ll tell him to hook you up.” for a second, he has no idea what she’s saying, and the only thing that’s really processing is that he won’t be getting laid tonight. deflating in every sense, and mouth agape in embarrassment as she talks,  he can only mumble a small thanks as he follows instructions.  really, he had no reason to comply, but trusting a random stranger seemed like the most exciting opportunity that would come to him for a while. only after she continues he gets it, and as he’s following her across the cup littered room he sees him. he would’ve just dismissed the guy in the corner of the room as a wallflower if he didn’t know any better, and although he’s getting the gut feeling that he shouldn’t be doing this he walks up to the expectant male.

“first time?”

“uh...no, dude. i’ve smoked plenty of times.” for a guy who pretends to be such a badass, he obviously’s the lamest of the bunch, because the other two begin cackling at his response. was that the wrong thing to say? so he laughs, along with them, pretending he’s in on a joke - even though it might be him.

“you’re funny. but for real, you’ve tried acid before, right? i don’t want to give it to you if you can’t handle it, man.”

 shit. acid? shit. this was really….really getting real. here he was, thinking he was getting a discount on some weed, when peeking out between the other’s hands is something much smaller than what he was expecting. he’s puzzled, but tries his best not to show it and shake the feeling off. “nah, im good. just a little nervous, that’s all. i haven’t….done this in a while, so….yeah.” by now he knows he sounds stupid, but this wasn’t what he signed up for when he agreed to come to this party. but what was he supposed to do? he had asked for fun and here came his saving grace - who was he not to accept an offer given to him so conveniently? fear is only reluctance about the unknown, he reminds himself. he’s not really scared to try it, he’s just scared because he doesn’t know what to expect. 

daein’s a sixteen year old phony, a kid from florida who smoked his first joint and thought he was the big man on campus. hell, he barely got away with sneaking that past his parents. how was he going to manage this? alcohol was predictable. he knew his body, and knew he could recover by the time he was supposed to be back from a “sleepover” with his friend. he’s never done anything above those things, and quite honestly is scared to try. but it wouldn’t hurt, just this once. he’s not going to let some nerves ruin his fun, right?”

“so…? you joining, or what, man?” daein’s lost in thoughts until he becomes aware of the awkward stare off, coughing uncomfortably. “oh - right, right. how much?” he asks, bringing his hand toward his wallet before the other brings it back down. he’s told not to worry about it, that it’s on the house - as long as he comes to him next time he wants to buy. just like that, it’s in his hand - what was it, exactly? a little square, almost like a piece of paper. it took multiple shots to knock him out cold. it was hard to imagine this would do anything.

looking around the circle they’ve formed, he’s watching to see who’s going to go first. not so much because of his nerves, but more because he doesn’t really know shit about what he’s doing. other kids might have learned from the movies or watched their friends, but these saturday night sneak-outs were the only times daein really got a glimpse of the real world. if he wasn’t here, he was at home studying, sleeping, or eating. but always, always under the watch of his parents. they were like hawks, which may have explained his desire to act out just this once where he wasn’t under their control.

everyone brings the thin slip to their lips - daein follows suit. everyone puts it under their tongue - he follows again. it’s like a game of simon says, except daein doesn’t really know what voice in his head is telling him to do all this. do i swallow it? do i chew? but no one else seems to do much else, so he lets it do it’s job.

now, the party’s starting, he thinks. except….it’s not. an hour passes. hell, wasn’t this stuff supposed to mess you up? he can barely feel a difference and it feels like he’s been waiting for hours. “i don’t feel shit,” he rather obnoxiously complains, only feeling the same boring buzz of alcohol. he wants more than this.

“dude, is this all you’ve got? you’re fucking weak. come on, i told you i’m not a lighthead. do you have anything else?”

“trust me, just chill out for a bit. it’ll kick in - i swear, you don’t need anything else.”

daein’s eyes plead for a reconsideration, but by the look on this guy’s face he’s not going to risk it. fine, he thinks. he doesn’t want to help him out? daein’s gonna speed up the process.

“pussies.” another shot.

but now….now he’s feeling something. the teen swears its because that one last shot gave him that extra push he needs, but after a while he’s not convinced that’s it. because it’s like a feeling in his chest, a feeling that’s getting bigger and bigger until it’s almost boiling over. he feels like he has bubbles in his stomach.

skip forward thirty minutes later, and it’s really kicking in. holy shit. he can feel every one of his toes, he swears, and when he tells his friends they tell him he’s gone crazy. it feels like the lights are getting hotter and hotter, and he wonders if it’s because he’s been dancing or it’s just his imagination. and honestly? he feels good. it’s like he’s really in one of those coming of age movies, everything seems so fun and everything is so funny. it’s like he’s dancing on the clouds, and daein gives himself a pat on the back for ever thinking this was a good idea.

it was different, but definitely manageable. this is nice, this is fine, he thinks. but the problem is, it’s like he’s going up an elevator he can stop.he wants everything to….stop here, but it’s not. fuck - how’s he going to get home.

now he’s got a new goal - have someone take him home, and take him home now. the feeling in his chest hasn’t subsided, and something’s telling him he hasn’t reached his peak high yet. what the hell was he going to do if he saw his parents like that? it was one thing climbing a fence drunk, but this….this was definitely different. he doesn’t have a clue how he’ll be able to sneak into his house like this - hell, he can hardly make it across the room. everything feels like it’s moving in slow motion around him, like he’s the only one who knows what’s going on. louder than the music, the voices, everything, he can hear his heart. it gets louder, louder, louder - shit, was it gonna beat out his chest?

“shit, is it gonna be out my chest?”

“what, is what gonna be out your che - man, what’d you take? you look awful.”

he knows that, but what can he do about that right now? he’s hot, at least, it feels like he is, but everything about him seems heavy and he’s not even sure he can wipe the sweat from his forehead. it seems like he has a piece of crinkled plastic over his eyes, like something’s stopping him from seeing clearly. he can’t see. it seems like every time he panics, he feels worse, and although he tries to calm down he’s not doing too good.

“home - i’ve gotta head home - now.”

“no can do. ask….tyler or something, i don’t know. i’m headed out with marina.”

“but-” he’s never heard himself this desperate. “-please.”

“sorry, devin. duty calls.”

duty calls. that’s his thing. and now that he’s the one asking for the ride, he realizes how shit the phrase really sounds. he’s the king of egocentrism, because all he can think is aren’t i more important? but he’s getting too unbothered to care, and through hooded eyes watches the other leave through the back door.

he makes the mistake of slumping down into the chair, and with how heavy his body seems it feels like he’s sinking into the carpet. he has to remind himself that he’s okay, that everything’s just an illusion, but it’s hard to remember when he feels like he’s falling further and further into the ground.

he’s sitting down, and still, it’s all just too much. he wants to throw up. there’s nowhere to go - his friends are assholes, and his parents will beat his ass. so he figures he’s a badass and can wait it out, and tries to close his eyes. but that doesn’t block out everything. he still hears the loud noises, feels the bodies brushing past him, feels like someone’s moving his chair around and around again. and for the first time that night, he realizes how alone he can feel around so many people. because he has no one. his heart’s getting louder, still. he’s slumped over a chair in the middle of a party and he thinks he’s gonna die. all he can think is - 

“how the hell did i get here?”

hot. cold. hot. cold. from breaking out into sweating fits to random spurts of chills, everything’s out of wack. and the funny part? he’s not even blaming it on the acid, he just wishes he knew where the thermostat is. but he can’t even find out, because the soles of his feet feel as if they’d got shackled down. he can’t go anywhere, and this is not ok.

he knows he needs to calm down, but the more he worries the faster the room seems to spin. the louder it seems to get, and the more daein wishes that it would all just stop. when he tries to get up again, only this time, he really feels like he’s headed for the floor.

until there’s nothing, nothing but darkness.

[noquirk-a]

ok anyway as i mentioned ... heres me talkin about deck’s relationships with other muses/charas bc im one big dickhead who never shuts up XD

   i’ll ... talk abt the most obvious one first. katsuki. specifically turtle’s katsuki bc i believe his is what i’ve talked with the most. it’s clear and obvious that deck despises him to the point he has a death wish against him, and most likely an EXTREMELY unhealthy obsession with him. but like, the obsession to do anything to put him down ... not even put him down like ‘ kill him ‘ but. at least crush his dreams. if anything, deck would rather cut off his hands or make him lose his quirk entirely just so he could feel what was it like to be it’s shoes. he wants ... to be above him. he wants him to experience karma and feel what he’s done to him. that’s a pretty common trope, i know, but considering what he’s ... done to him that’s all he actually wants. be it in a verse that he’s the hero or the villain, he doesn’t care. he’s going to find a way to fuck him up so bad that’ll have him end up underneath his foot as he crushes his hands with his foot, grinning like the damn cheshire cat, laughing softly as he goes ‘ who’s powerless now, kacchan? ‘

    even if ... katsuki would like. want deck to go back to heroism bc it feels so fucking wrong to have someone so determined to become a hero suddenly change his point of view. deck was literally one who would NEVER give up on his dreams and then suddenly he just. fell down. would he come to his senses and realize this? nah. if anything, he belives that he’s in the right mindset of having a perspective that it was society that was wrong. ( and ok, not being biased but somehow it is wrong 4 them to discriminate the quirkless like that. ) or maybe it’s just his pettiness not wanting to be in a side where he is right now. he’s no longer going to tolerate all the bullshit he’s thrown onto him, even if he asks penitence for that.

   another one is all might or toshinori. this is honestly where he ( all might ) has the biggest disadvantage and will realize he’s done the most foolish mistake. that being both underestimating deku and telling him the wrong mindset at first, AND telling him his weakness. deck, entering the league and getting in touch with afo, would definitely ask for like ... a stronger noumo similar to shi/garaki’s and fight him himself. i mean, not his bare hands ofc, but like through manipulating the noumo. the thing is he KNOWS his ultimate weakness and would often approach that. and at his exact downfall he’d be the one smiling, asking him if he remembers him, and like.. the ‘ i told you so ‘ or w/e attitude that shows that he was wrong on telling him that he couldn’t be a hero. he was strong as a villain ... so what more of him becoming an actual hero? he completely wasted it and crushed that dream of his. his confidence / hope is a deck of cards and his words are but a mere blow and he just. wants him to feel that that was one of his biggest mistakes tbh.

    herE’S ONE THAT IM SOOOOOOOOOOOO in love with bc it gives him a speck of humanity / little hope .. uraraka. there’s a seperate post for her find it in the tags but she... she’s literally the only star in deck’s empty night sky. almost. kind of. she’s supposed to be a hero and she IS a hero but the difference is she saw him as an equal at first and that’s something .. deck’s really thankful for. it’s plotted that she does a lot just to make him turn back / ‘ SAVE ‘ him to the point she could like .. die and still hope for him. that literally just puts him in a plethora of twist and turn of emotions bc like .. it’s. so. so fucking foreign to him, everything she’s doing. i can put this in a longer post but im JKSLFMSKJLFSKJFLM to him, she’s his hero for making him realize this. he may not give in that quickly or w/e, but she makes him realize something.

   then there’s ... deku. like, canon deku, not deck, bc like tbh i always llive for crossover universes / canon meeting au. it’s fascinating to me. anyway deck sees himself as like ... the BETTER version 4 some reason bc he sees it that he’s not ‘’blind’’ to society’s truth. he sees deku as someone who just ... gave in to that lie.i mean even in his verse where he DOES achieve all might’s quirk he realizes soon enough that this was all wrong ... why couldn’t he become a hero without a quirk? he sees him as like .. literally believing and accepting the fact that you should have a quirk before becoming a hero and tbh? he hates him for that, and envies him so much at the same time bc as most people say, ignorance is bliss, and he wishes he could’ve went through the same thing and be ignorant, too. but nah. he had to be the one ( or at least in his pov ) with ‘’eyes open’’ to how cruel / ugly society is. 

   ok then ... tooru aka @/vanishedstar. call it a coping thing or w/e but he projects himself to tooru bc they have similar background stories, difference is tooru was BORN with a quirk but taken from him and he’s full of love, whilst deck was born without and is just ... full of anger and wrath. he, like most people, sees him as nothing else but a stepping stone. bc like he can’t accomplish EVERYTHING alone, like alone in the literal sense so ofc he gets people as ‘ puppeteers ‘ them to follow his plan just so he could achieve his goal. since he’s already quirkless like him he trains him and teaches him how to fight physically and tells him w/e he knows. basically he molds him into someone like him, but like, the weaker version, bc he doesn’t want someone to outsmart him or run higher than him. think like ... a little student. or a little brother that he teaches idk XDD he’s always another proof / verification to his belief that people look on quirks, not the actual person. the fact that most ppl left him after he’s gone quirkless just seconds it tbh.

    ahmya. ... aka @/eyepsyche. this relationship is INCREDIBLY toxic and pure stockholm not going to lie. her quirk is EXTREMELY useful to him bc she can gather a lot of info and see a lot of things abt a person, and though deck can do that himself, she can gather so much more info for him and that just adds up to his knowledge. useful, right? she’s reluctant sometimes or at least at first, but deck REFUSES to let her go. and it’s not because he ... loves her or anything. he does’t have any feelings for her he just finds her very, very useful. think like an expensive knife or w/e that you’re not willing to lose. that expensive tech pen you keep in your case that other ppl might not see as much. ahmya, prior to meeting deck, was just a regular girl w/ no ‘purpose’ and deck gives her that .... the purpose being a huge stepping stone so he can accomplish what he must ^_^ SMSLGLS it’s incredibly disgusting of him tbh but he’s that desperate to finish what he wants to anyway and he has little to no care about others so what gives, right? he treats her like a pet, gives her constant validation that’s fake just so she could depend on him and all that. it’s pure ... nasty.but that honestly just shows his true nature of being a manipulative, toxic, selfish bastard.

   then there’s nooni aka @/creepquirk! much like ahmya and tooru, deck first saw nooni as the same thing : a pawn. a stepping stone. a little doll in his play that’ll help him reach what he wants. but there was just something about nooni that just ... opened somthing in him tbh. bc nooni was like, similar to deck in some ways, wanting to be a hero but society pushing you away. he stripped her off of that dream while she could still live it and dragged her to his own hell. but the thing was, somehow in the league, nooni ... still had that bit of hope of becoming a hero despite everything and tbh?? tbh?????????????? deck .. adores that. ofc he doesn’t show it on the outside bc hes a XDD tsundere bitch. no im kidding deck isn’t one to like be vulnerable or w/e but nooni was just so different to him bc she handles everything way better than him and this and that that just made him care deeply about her...n honestly? he regrets pulling/dragging her down and sometimes wish she couldve lived her dream instead and become that part he wish he could’ve become, but he finds himself unable to turn back despite being knee deep into everything while she still has a chance. tbh i cant put it all into words bc not even deck could, he’s that much of a mess that sometimes i can’t even decipher him bc he’s a complex chara tbh, but basically he just sees her as some kind of inspiration.

   then theres XDD villain todo who’s dead but idc i love their relationship. tbh they’re your typical little shits in love but like it’s not shown. todo and deck are similar in the way that they’re both wanting to get revenge on a particular someone ( his dad and for him katsu/all might ) so he can.. emphasize with him on that. maybe sometimes he even uses him bc lbr, todo is EXTREMELY powerful and clever for his age, but ofc that’s a hassle bc like i said, he’s intelligent, but not enough to the point he has to look down on deck due to being quirkless. he does at first but realizes he’s an excellent strageist so XDDDDDDDDD ok but anyway 2 the gay stuff bc todo is the most confusing person 2 deck ... he acts so kind to him and w/ the aforementioned 2 ura’s, kindness is so fucking foreign to him. maybe not his mom’s, but towards others he ... doesnt know how to handle it???????????????? and sometimes its just so soft and comforting that when it’s given to him he cant help but be addicted??????????????? is it love?? maybe?? maybe not????? love or is this just me desperately wanting affection from someone else?????????????????????? hm! who knwos ^_^ their rs is complicataed n? same.

    ok ( wheeze ) last one ... is mo. mortimer...morty.........or @/noricks........ maybe it’s bc they belong in different universes but like what rick wrote deck just ... sees himself as him. like they’re almost so painfully similar in terms of EVERYTHING except for some few parts. YA their backstories are different but it just ... leads them to the person who ends up sitting on the throne and acting like a god bc ‘’’ God was cruel to them ‘’’ . i went 2 recollection once and the speaker once said if you hate someone, it’s probably bc they remind you of yourself n i think? that just explains why he’ so aggressive towards him sometimes JSMGJS TMHSIMGHSLGKMSKLGM he . hates himself actually. deck i mean. he doesn’t .. he isn’t outwardly proud of what he’s become n bc mo reminds him of THAT it just irks him tbh. but at the same time he respects him bc???????????????? seriously who accomplishes all of this at the age of 14. he’s one of the or maybe the only person he actually respects other than all of the ppl he actually knows now. 

   i might edit this i jus wanna eat Fuck.

[kyungpom]

Hey , we have never talked before. But some people on the kaisoo side are always talking shit about you and really making deep, horrible accusations against you. I feel terrible as a kaisoo shipper and I want to say sorry and I apologize that you are being treated this way. Im glad you never deleted and I really appreciate you very much. I respect you.

sorry for the late reply. i got this ask before all the shitstorm from the other day (i think) and it made me emo lol. i appreciate it so much that you cared enough to send this even if we don’t know each other ♥

sighhh they always seem to be up to trouble over there, and i felt like it was a matter of time until they got to me. tbh i knew somebody would try to use fic against me someday since that’s something that’s got fandom’s opinion very divided and i’ve never shied away from any kind of fic, but i never expected anyone to try to paint me as a p*dophile. that’s a strong word that never fails to make people turn their heads and take up arms against others and the antis know it well. it’s even been used against kyungsoo before. it’s so frustrating to watch your fandom become a giant wild beast and not being able to do anything about it. i’m a soo&kai stan and shipper too i guess (altho im reluctant to call myself one till we talk about the definition) and ever since i got here i’ve been inevitably watching that side of the fandom slowly spiral out of control, and now they’ve come after me. and who knows who else they might target next. i’m not the first and i won’t be the last.

i remember back in 2012 it was just annoying to see ppl littering the tags with random posts stretching any moments or when they were photographed individually or were interacting with other people and making it about kaisoo, making it hard to find content like gifs & updates. useless to me but could be ignored. but over the years, what would’ve just been a headcanon, has garnered a cult following that has elevated it to a “belief” blurring the line between imagination and reality, something that is essential if you want to dive into real person shipping and fiction and keep your feet grounded in reality. they say anyone’s free to believe whatever they want, and it’s true, after all, that’s still in your imagination and it doesn’t affect the real people, but this following has dedicated so much time to feeding their headcanon that somehow, along the way, they’ve managed to convince themselves that the fantasy is real and what would’ve been random posts easy to ignore, fic inspiration and headcanons, has turned into this sort of… set of almost sacred beliefs that get passed down across the eras and those who don’t believe get punished. lol sounds like i’m talking about a dangerous religious cult or smth but idk a better way to describe it, that’s literally how they talk about their headcanon and what they do: they claim their headcanon is a belief, that it is real, and they’re so possesive of the boys and their imaginary romantic relationship they don’t tolerate differences of opinion. they’re always at war with people who ship other pairings and when they’re not fighting others they fight ppl within their own community. they bother kaisoo writers about the content of their fic (sexual position, if the couple doesn’t end up together or is paired with other people, unhappy endings, etc. anything that deviates from their idea of them) a friend told me they even make black lists for “fake” kaisoo writers who don’t believe the ship is real. they can even go as far as bullying fellow shippers and writers and making the most horrible accusations to put people against you. they’ve managed to chase people away and change their dentity to stay safe. this is why they hate me, because i’m still here and i’m not afraid to share different/unpopular opinions (what my blog was basically created FOR) and talking honestly about the shit they do to us.

they claim to be about love and rainbows but they’re so intolerant, conflictive and aggressive they make their ship so hard to love. i don’t check the tag for updates anymore, i don’t even feel comfortable talking about the boys AS FRIENDS on my own blog, i do my best to stay away from these kinds of shippers, i don’t even want to learn any urls to avoid disliking anyone in particular (bc my issue is with the crowd mentality and how they’ve treated people all these years, not specific people. most of what people say about kaisoo nowadays has been repeated for years) and i still see some of their drama and now they go out of their way to get me involved and come to bother me here. i guess leaving would be the easiest way to make it stop but leaving is not a smart solution, it would be like yielding to a tantrum, and im being generous here because these are not children just kicking and screaming.i think something a lot of people don’t understand is that the idols we imagine are not the same as the real people, and they’re not the same as other people’s idea of them either. every one of them is a personal interpretation (maybe acquired from others, but still) and we have no reason to attack others for their imagination. and we can’t claim our opinion/idea of them is the absolute truth either. only the real people know what they’re like, and even then they could be confused about themselves, just like us, but as long as we’re aware that our idea of them is ours and separate from the real people, i don’t think it’s so bad to play with their imaginary selves, whether it’s in your head or in a story. after all, part of their job is selling fantasies.

[liachtaschta]

SHIPPING INFO

ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSE(S) SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG. repost. don’t reblog.

WHAT’S YOUR OTP FOR YOUR MUSE?: liech/her family’s unconditional love for her tbh

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO RP WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?: both liech and i are unwilling to rp anything nsfw so thats a no-go. im pretty much willing to do anything else but that?? within reason ofc!! id prefer if i talked to the mun first

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?: age gap is iffy in the aph community tbh because of how old they all are. im probably not willing to put her in a relationship with a non-national personification tho if that counts. 

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?: pretty selective yes!! im very reluctant to ship anything with people i dont talk ooc with!!

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY’RE CONSIDERED NSFW?: anything that would be considered indecent in a public space tbh

WHO ARE OTHER MUSES YOU SHIP YOUR MUSE WITH?: i think @hetadrenna is the only active muse i’d ship her with atm?? i havent discussed anything with anyone else!!

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:  yes!! pls dont make a move on liech without talking to me about it first -- especially if you want it to go somewhere!! and as i mentioned before id prefer to only ship with friends muses!!

HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?: i mean id like liech to find someone eventually but its not priority!!

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?: no but!! im more than willing to rp past relationships and whatnot!!

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?: ship more-or-less tbh. like ive said before shipping has never been a priority the majority of my interactions are non-ship based 

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?: all my familiar ships with liech

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?: just talk to me ooc and bring it up!! we can definitely work something out!!

TAGGED BY: @mezzogiorno TAGGING: @hetadrenna // @krambamblyat // @pearlsacrossmycollarbones // @karskeladden // @icedcappsinspring and anyone else who wishes to do this!!

[gaybluesargent]

Please provide me with every detail about these beautiful raven girls. i've got a notepad to fill with ink and nowhere to be in the morning...

this is very very late, so that morning has passed, but hopefully you still have some room in that notepad! just a note that all my raven girl headcanons are trans girl headcanons! & for the sake of my raven girls aus, aglionby is co-ed!(also, /tagged/all-your-favs-are-trans-girls!)

gansey:

generally Proficient at preforming femininity - looking and acting in ways everybody traditionally expects from a girl - but only really feels the need to be read as very Traditionally Feminine when she’s around her family

has very little physical dysphoria (she doesn’t rly want hormones or surgery) but her social dysphoria can get rly bad & lead to panic attacks if she doesn’t pass well enough in public

but with her friends, it’s not typically too bad!

i think she probably came out when she was like 14 or 15? she started transitioning when she was off traveling by herself!

so her family was kind of Shocked and gansey still. Has Trouble with that sometimes. but they’re not outright terrible about it. just. not rly Good either. 

she’s got shoulder-length hair in a clean-cut bob (that gets a little curly in humidity), but she puts it up into a ponytail or a hat as much as possible because she doesn’t like the way hair feels on her neck 

(it’s reminiscent of hornets)

post-trk she definitely chops her hair off and gets a rly cute pixie :’)

is Skilled at makeup and uses it to hide all the evidence of sleepless nights

paints her nails religiously because she finds the act of painting them very calming and likes the way it feels!

often paints them orange to match the camaro, even though helen tried to tell her that it looks a little juvenile to have bright orange nails

daily wardrobe (polo shirts, khaki pants, boat shoes) is virtually unchanged tbh… geek… i love her….

and for formal occasions, helen lets gansey borrow from her wardrobe if she wants!

(ps! more trans girl gansey content here!)

i looked all over for the post cuz i think i stole this idea from someone else so link me if u know it, but someday gansey marries blue and legally changes her name to Gansey Sargent :’)

ronan:

butch! trans! lesbian! ronan! niall! lynch!!

(she loves her full name because her parents gave it to her and she doesn’t plan on ever changing it)

came out when she was 15, and once niall was killed, she started physically and socially transitioning All At Once

still has her head shaved. im in love with her. 

has and will punch a bigot without hesitation

she has 100 earrings in each ear and wears lots of rings

paints her nails to pick it all off the next day

when gansey’s extra anxious, she paints ronan’s nails for her, and it’s Soft :’)

her wardrobe is 100% unchanged from canon - rich tired punk farmer - and she looks gr8

she generally can’t walk in heels at all but she’s got this one pair of heeled boots that make her absurdly tall and she Loves It!

makeup skills are limited to making her look as Pissed Off as possible (meaning middle-school emo raccoon eyeliner and black lipstick probably)

typically not super dysphoric unless verbally misgendered

& isn’t rly comfortable with how deep her voice is but also isn’t willing to try to talk higher because she thinks she sounds silly, so she stays quiet a lot around new people

dreams up some fuckin miracle hormones for everyone and it’s Wonderful!

adam:

came out & transitioned later than everybody else because she wouldn’t even Consider her gender while she was still living with her parents

tbh gender probably plays into the whole Feeling Unknowable even to herself thing

but all her friends are trans as heck so she’s got a rly solid support system to help her once she starts to figure it out!

is rly reluctant to publicly transition because she’s worried abt how it might affect her future - being a trans girl makes life so much harder than just staying a cis boy - but, over time, she starts to make peace with it and realizes that Being Herself is worth the risk!

she fiddles with gender rly subtly at first: not really changing the style of clothes she wears, but buying t-shirts from the girl’s section instead of the boy’s section… growing her bangs out but keeping the rest of her hair short… wearing lip gloss… 

and these little changes help her comfort immensely, and eventually lead to more obvious changes in presentation!

tbh she probably comes out as A Girl first and then realizes she’s actually maybe a demigirl/a nb girl/something like that because being feminine feels Way Better than being masculine, but being A Girl doesn’t feel totally right either

and ronan helps with this, both as a role model for Not Giving A Fuck and also as a butch girl who shows adam that gender and gender expression don’t have to always align perfectly!

every now and then, adam puts on a skirt, and everyone in a 5 mile radius falls in love because she looks Damn Good!

especially with knee socks? like! shit!!!

noah:

noah is a ghost! you think ghosts care about gender? nope! noah’s agender or genderfluid in every universe and thems the facts 🙏🏻

but when noah was alive… he had some Gender Stuff

like, nothing as concrete as actively identifying as something other than a boy, but i think he definitely dabbled in gender presentation as a “haha jokes isn’t it funny” but secretly and quietly because it Felt Right

like… he definitely stole adele’s skirts a few times and his friends were like “czerny r u gay!” and he’s like “haha” but it was definitely actually subtle Gender Feelings that he didn’t have the vocabulary to express

anyway! once he’s dead he has no body and his presentation as Ghost Illusion can change with his comfort

so some days, he manifests looking more femme, and his friends know when to switch up pronouns and make him feel better!

similarly, he can read everybody’s mind, so he always knows what to say and how to comfort his friends when they’re feeling down about anything, including gender stuff!

henry: 

stylizes her name to ‘henri’ to be a little more femme!

Fashion Icon! 

she’s inexplicably stylish. like. the outfits she puts together are Ridiculous and no one in their right mind would wear them and they look Amazing?

sometimes more femme, sometimes comfy being a little more butch, sometimes splicing styles completely! There Are No Rules!

also her Hair. legendary. she grows it out and does all kinds of things to it. she’s known for her elaborate braids. :’)

makeup took the longest to master but now she’s great at it and helps the rest of the girls do their makeup too cuz she’s easily the best at it!

absolutely unapologetic? henri “kiss my trans ass” cheng. henri “down with cis” cheng. 

once henri is fully integrated into the group and gets access to the Dream Hormones, she’s like “!!! idk why my mom is wasting time trading magical artifacts when we could just sell this shit! we’d be set for life and it’d be a great cause!!”

blue:

let’s make her a trans girl too cuz why not!

when maura was pregnant and they found out blue was a boy, calla and persephone were like ‘…sounds fake but okay’

so when blue gravitated toward femme stuff and insisted she was a girl from a young age, they were all like ‘ah that makes more sense!’

there wasn’t a lot of money around 300 fox way for hormones and stuff, but there’s lots of love to go around and they always make sure blue is supported and as comfortable as possible!

blue gets into sewing and making her own clothes during middle school, once puberty starts to wreak havoc on her ability to seamlessly shop in the girl’s department! 

this is a skill that she shares with the rest of the girls once she meets them – she helps them tailor and tweak all their clothes to fit more comfortably!!

she and henry become Fashion Buddies and they make outfits for each other all the time!

300 fox way is kind of a sanctuary for all the girls – surrounded by women who easily and immediately accept them as women too, surrounded by the magic they’re all so in love with… maura, calla, and persephone are their adoptive moms! they have sleepovers at blue’s all the time, individually when they’re having bad days and group sleepovers for fun!! 

[natsunes]

Rules: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… And most importantly, have fun!

Tagged by: @geekybiologist​ you are absolutely right i love these, i always do them, whenever rarely i get the chance

a - age: 16....... b - biggest fear: i fear so many things c - current time: 9:48 (AM) d - drink you last had: I’m currently drinking tea ( answer goes for approximately 18h a day) e - every day starts with: tea and porridge currently f - favorite song: I have no idea g - ghosts, are they real: im not sure if i wish they were h - hot or cold weather: well, the hot side of things but not 40 degrees or anything i - in love with: character developement j - jealous of: people who know themselves and others k - killed someone: I had a dream last night where i accidentally killed 14 people in a submarine by throwing my friend’s bomb in the wrong direction? l - last time you cried: like...wednesday probably m - middle earth race:  what. oh. Um. I don’t actually know n - number of siblings: zero o - one wish: joy to the world p - person you last called/texted: a friend q - questions you’re always asked: “what tea is this” r - reasons to smile: I'm leaving for japan in like...three days s - song last sang: since i havent sang anything today....cotton eye joe (thanks sara) t - time you woke up: 8:20 u - underwear color: black, probably v - vacation destination: dream? probably iceland tbh. w - worst habit: building huge fears for myself and becoming reluctant to do the simplest things x - x-rays you’ve had: lungs y - your favorite food: i just like food in general a lot z - zodiac sign: aquarius

[spaceanakin]

It's Obikin time! Let's celebrate our favourite ship! Reply with a random headcanon, a fic or art rec, or just why you love Obikin! Feel free to tag people!

AHHHH YAY okay okay time to give you guys the good shit™

Fic Recs (in no particular order):

 The Hot Santa Hunt by anecdotalist

In which Anakin, Padme, and Ahsoka embark on a quest to find the hottest mall Santa at the Corcuscant mall and Obi-Wan may just be actual Santa Claus. (With Cody, Rex, Waxer, and Boil as his military-trained elvish helpers/bodyguards.

Truly cute and adorable, I want a sequel

wicked thing by imaginarykat    (tho whos list is this not on tbh)

There are rumours of yet another Sith Lord hiding among the Separatists. The Council sends Anakin to investigate. Anakin has a bad feeling about this.or,the story of how Anakin exists in a perpetual state of intense embarrassment, Kenobi is enjoying it a little too much, and everything is, generally speaking, a gigantic mess.

iWEHFIUHEWUIFHKJDSDAJKHWLEHKLJBBBUUUUU, The best writing and characterization you’ll ever see tbh

Seed by bell (bellaboo)

When Anakin falls prey to a lethal poison, Obi-Wan has no choice but use all his resources to heal him– no matter how reluctant he is in administering the antidote.

Takes crack and makes it sad lmao, but so good.

A Mouthful of Ash by jcrowquill

What if Obi-Wan hadn’t let Anakin burn on Mustafar? On the run from the newly formed Galactic Empire, Obi-Wan and Anakin must come to terms with the fact that they both still need each other, even if they don’t know how to forgive each other for what has happened.

Features all prosthetic limbed Anakin :3c Obi-Wan and him have an angst journey but are starting to sort their shit now so~  

Negotiation by Glare

Over a year ago, Coruscant Police Detective Anakin Skywalker vanished without a trace while hunting the prolific serial killer known within the media as “The Negotiator”. Now, Skywalker has been found and rescued from captivity in a cabin deep within the Naboo wilderness, the only known survivor of an encounter with The Negotiator. The only question on anyone’s mind is: What happened during his time away?

Boi, Obi-Wan as a serial killer is amazing. Think Kenobi from wicked thing but more……. out of his wits trying to get Anakin to be safe. If you like Hannigram you’ll absolutely love this.

Sigh No More by edenwolfie **

Anakin makes slightly better choices, Obi-Wan is a Mess™ and Padmé deserves none of this. AU from Mustafar onward with liberal manipulation of canon to culminate in some angsty, fluffy, domestic fix-it because we all deserve better.I’m going to fix everything Lucas broke if it kills me.

An Obianidala fic but none the less I’m putting this on here cause u gotta read it, its pretty much a domestic AU after Mustafar.

The Reality of Change by midnight_vision **

Padmé dies on Mustafar and wakes up in the past, about a year before everything falls apart. She’s determined to make sure none of it happens again, and with some help, she tries to expose Palpatine for what he really is. But even if Anakin and the Republic can be saved, that doesn’t mean life will be easy.

Another Obianidala fic! So ik you guys love them time travel fics right? Well this fic does that but for a change of pace its Padme who comes back. BUT not only that unlike so many other fics that just END or have a single chapter epilogue we get to see what exactly it is that happens AFTER (spoilers except not really) Palps dies. Highly recommend.

Solstice Night by XtinethePirate 

The holiday on Coruscant… a time for Masters and Padawans to celebrate together in the Temple. A progression of years seen through the eyes of Anakin Skywalker on this special night.

I almost wanna say this is THE obikin fic, although I feel like a lot of you guys haven’t actually heard of it cause its not on AO3. But yeah dear god this fic, don’t let its summary deceive you, you’ll cry like a baby ik i did. Its also where I stemmed my Obikin tag from “not perfect just happy” !!!!  

Note: lmao none of these have a sad ending (at least the completed ones lol) bc im not about that life.

Maybe ill do a headcanon another time :3c I feel bad it took me so long to respond to this message and I can’t think of a short one rn. BUT hey hmu if u wanna tell me ur obikin headcanons yo.