#so that's fucked up and fuck my mom actually she sucks

[pitrsattabhaadmeinjaa]

wont you kiss me on the mouth (and love me like a sailor)

buddie, 2.1k

beta reader: @krissy-kat

“I’m in love with Eddie!” Buck nearly yells as soon as his sister opens the door after his frantic knocking and calls of her name, panting like he’d run a marathon, half-leaning on the doorframe, half falling inside. “Maddie, I’m in love with my best friend!”

“Buck–” Maddie’s eyes are wide and she’s carrying a half filled wine glass.

He started turning around to find a place to lay down and never get up again, just to stop in his tracks when he saw what had Maddie so worked up.

Eddie.

Or, Buck discovers he’s in love with Eddie, rants about it to Maddie, and doesn’t realise Eddie is right behind him.

“I’m in love with Eddie!” Buck nearly yells as soon as his sister opens the door after his frantic knocking and calls of her name, panting like he’d run a marathon, half-leaning on the doorframe, half falling inside. “Maddie, I’m in love with my best friend!”

“Buck–” Maddie’s eyes are wide and she’s carrying a half-filled wine glass.

He sidesteps her to enter the house, rubbing his face like if he did it hard enough, he could stop feeling these emotions. He walks in a few steps and turns to her with his back to the rest of the house and says, “Maddie, oh god, I’m so fucked, Maddie– I was just dropping off Chris at his friend’s house for a sleepover and the kid’s mom met me outside to greet us,” Buck starts gesturing with his arms, “And after Chris went inside she started asking about me, right, like, asking how I am and if I knew how this sweater brings out the color of my eyes, and like of course I know, that why I chose it, but that's besides the point. The point is that it made me uncomfortable! Like, since when has someone hitting on me made me uncomfortable?

“And then when I thought about it a little, Maddie, you know what I realized? I didn’t like it because she’s not the one I wanted to notice my sweater, I didn’t like it because I wore it to meet Eddie later today,” he burst out, “to go get pizza at this new place that opened up that we wanted to try and see if Chris would like it, and I wanted him to like my sweater and my eyes!”

“Buck, wait–”

“No, no, this cannot wait. I’ve been thinking about that the whole drive here, that I want Eddie to think I look good and that I think he looks extremely good in the jeans that came half-off with this sweater that I let him borrow because I knew they would look so good on him– No, stop distracting me, I need to tell you what happened next.”, he said, holding up both hands. Buck had been stewing in that fact deeply the whole hour and a half that he had been driving and sitting in traffic, thinking back to every interaction he’d had with his best friend. Had he always liked the way Eddie’s brown eyes shone whenever he smiled at Buck, or how his fingers looked perfect for sucking on, or how his voice was all rough and raspy and hot in the mornings? No wonder Tommy left him after a few months.

“Apparently, that lady wasn’t his mom, but just her twin sister who’s visiting, which, does make more sense because I know his actual mother loves her husband too much to do that, and when Sandra came out, she apologized to me, to which I replied ‘no, it's all good’, but then, she scolded her sister, which at first I was confused a little by,” Buck splayed his hands open, showing his apparent confusion, “but then she told her sister that I’m Christopher’s other dad, Eddie’s husband. And I wanted to correct her, but I didn’t, because you know why?”

He fisted his hands and joined them, and leaned down toward her, speaking through his teeth, “Because I liked it! I liked her referring to me as Eddie’s husband, as Christopher’s dad, because,” he tilted his head pointedly, “as I’ve deduced on the ride here, I want to be Eddie’s husband and Christopher’s dad!”

Maddie’s face had a look of urgency, and she was looking behind Buck, but he disregarded it as soon as she said, “Buck, Eddie is–”

“Yes, I know Eddie’s straight, and he could never love me like that,” he pressed the heels of his palms to his eyes, and a broken, wet laugh emerged from him, “but I just needed to tell you as soon as possible because you gave me some pretty solid advice on how to deal with Eddie-related stuff last time, and oh my god, that wasn’t me trying to get Tommy’s attention was it? I was trying to get Eddie’s back.” His hands were no longer against his eyes, and his face was lit with a mix of realization and dismay. His head was also brimming with the same, realizing that he’s been in love with Eddie for far longer than he thought, and devastated with the fact that he can’t do anything about it. Eddie was straight, and their relationship will never be the same after this, because there is no way that Buck can keep lying to his Ed–his friend for long, no way that he can bear Eddie not knowing everything about him.

He started turning around to find a place to lay down and never get up again, just to stop in his tracks when he saw what had Maddie so worked up.

Eddie.

Eddie, sitting there on Maddie and Chimney’s couch. Eddie, with his mouth open and a beer halfway to his mouth. Eddie, with his eyes wide and that borderline pornographic mustache he’d grown.

Eddie, who heard all of that. Eddie, who is surely about to break Buck’s heart by letting him down gently and he cannot bear the rejection right now.

So he did the only rational thing one can do in a situation such as this. Taking a page out of all his ex’s books, he ran.

…

Eddie didn’t think his ears were working right, because there is no way that just happened, right? His best friend didn’t just basically confess his love to him and run away, right? Right?

Except that’s exactly what happened, because even if he was delusional and hallucinating that, the expression on Maddie and Chim’s face is shocked enough that he can be sure they all saw that.

So now that he’s sure that was real, he can safely go through his emotions, starting with: What. WHAT. Buck loves me? Buck loves me back? What?! Fuck. Buck loves me. Fucking fuck yes. Buck loves me. Wait. Fuck. Buck loves me. Buck ran away. Shit. Buck doesn’t know I love him. Shit. SHIT.

Maddie’s looking at him, apparently over her shock now, sporting an expectant look on her face. “Well? What are you waiting for?”

The sound of an engine starting outside stirred him from his own dazed surprise, and he did the only rational thing one can do in a situation such as this. Taking a page out of Buck’s book, he ran.

After Buck, that is.

Eddie kept his beer on the table and leaped to his feet, and ran out, foregoing shoes, and saw Buck’s Jeep pulling out the driveway, on the street. Shit. “Stop, Buck, wait! Buck, stop, would you just–for god’s sake Buck, stop!” He didn’t.

Due to the lack of fully-there-ness because the love of his life had just said he loved Eddie back, no one can blame him for what he did next. He ran in front of the car. Because more than he was reckless at the moment, he had full trust in Buck not to run him over.

Which turned out to be true because as soon as Buck saw him, he braked hard and then just–froze. His baby blue eyes wide open and hands gripping the wheel, he just sat there staring at Eddie who was in front of the car with his hands out.

Eddie pointed at Buck. “Out. Now. No running.”

Buck's face turned stony and he reinforced his grip on the wheel. “No.”

“No? What do you mean no? Get out of the car, Buck!”

“Or what?” Buck’s face was now doing that thing where he thought he could stay strong enough to resist the Diaz Eyes, patented by one Christopher Diaz. He was so annoyed, because he never could. And he’d done enough therapy to know that Eddie wouldn’t let this ruin their friendship but Buck was too high on his emotions that he couldn’t take even a gentle let down by his best friend, so he resorted to acting petulant.

Eddie, who was also a Diaz and aware of the Eyes, said nothing and just stared at Buck pointedly, with one finger still pointing to the ground outside the Jeep.

Buck, as expected, didn’t hold out long. His face turned resigned, and he heaved a big sigh, folding in on himself in the driver’s seat. He slowly started opening the door, and Eddie, now satisfied Buck would actually come out, went over to him.

He got out of the car, eyes downcast and opened his mouth to defend himself. “Eddie, please. Just reject me later, I can’t bear it now–”, only to be interrupted by Eddie’s lips.

Wait. By Eddie’s lips? What?

Eddie was kissing him. Eddie was kissing him. Eddie was kissing him. And Buck was just standing there like an idiot.

Well, no one said he couldn't learn and go with the flow. He brought his hands up, one to Eddie’s, who was cupping Buck’s face, and one to Eds’ hip, holding him close. The kiss was…amazing. It was everything they said it would be. Fireworks, a burst of emotion, senses dulled to everything except the points their bodies were touching.

It was magnificent. And short-lived. Eddie pulled away first, Buck subconsciously leaning forward to chase his lips, away from where he was pinned against the Jeep. He opened his eyes, and the world, and all of its tortuous realities, came flooding back.

“What.”, his voice cracked. Tears were starting to build up in his eyes, and Evan Buckley had never been more confused in his life.

Eddie was still staring at his lips, and said dazedly, “God, I should’ve been kissing you a long time ago if that’s what it feels like.”

“What.” Buck’s world was rocked. What did Eddie just say?

Eddie took pity on him, and looked up at his eyes. And then he said the most ridiculous thing ever. “I love you too, Buck.”

“What. I– I don’t understand.”

Eddie softened then, his smile turning small and quiet, and his eyes took a devastatingly watery quality, “I want you to be my husband too, and Christopher’s other dad. Legally, that is, because you’ve been raising him alongside me for years now a.”

Oh. Buck’s world rocked further. This all wasn't a dream, or a confusing second reality. Eddie loved him. Eddie wanted to be his husband too.

Buck’s expression started clearing up, a hopeful one dawning on his face. He was the happiest man in the whole world, and he knew Eddie wouldn’t lie to him, but, “Really?”

His future-husband’s face turned mock reserved at that, a glint of mirth in his eyes giving him away. “Well, no, I was just kidding–”

Buck interrupted him with his lips, “Nope, no take-backs, you said it now, sorry.”, with a cheeky smile, and Eddie gave up all pretense, laughing fondly at the man he loved. They leaned in again, and Eddie gently poured all the love he had into this kiss, moving a hand up to Buck’s hair and pulling him in even closer by his waist with another. They moved slow, because it felt like they had all the time in the world now, and nothing could get in between them, nothing– click.

They broke apart, both grinning at each other dopily first, to see Maddie and Chimney out on the front porch, twin grins pulling at their faces and taking a photo of them.

Chim gave them two thumbs and Maddie held the phone up to them and yelled, “I’M SENDING THIS TO THE GROUPCHAT.”

Chim pointed aggressively at them and said, “BUCK I’M GONNA BE YOUR BEST MAN, I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU BUT DON’T YOU DARE ASK ANYONE ELSE!”

Maddie looked up from her texting at that, “Sorry, babe, but I’m gonna be his best woman.” Buck chimed in from his place in Eddie’s arms, “Yeah, Chim, sorry, but she’s right.”

“Aw, well,” he sighed, “You’re the only person I’d give up that spot to.”, and lovingly pecked his wife’s cheek.

Eddie looked back then, “DON’T WORRY, BUD. YOU CAN BE MINE!” Chim whooped at that, and Maddie went back to the barrage of texts that must surely be coming in from their family, shaking her head fondly.

Buck kissed him again, chastely this time, for his sister’s sake. “You don’t think we’re moving a little fast?”

“This has been seven years in the making, baby. You’re my family, and I’m not waiting on societal norms to make it legal.” Eddie punctuated that with a kiss to Buck’s birthmark, and what could Buck do other than melt?

His eyes shone, and he let his grin lose once again. “Well, thank god for Sandra.”

Eddie laughed into his love’s neck, and hugged him close.

“I can’t wait to spend forever with you.”

[ourceliumnetwork]

yeah guys idk I'm just thinking maybe the lightheadedness and desire to sit down about halfway through putting away groceries my whole life might not have just been a reaction to the way my parents were when i was a kid and the accompanying anxiety and sudden flurry of movement, but also possibly maybe i have a Health Thing about this...

[crypt1dcorv1dae]

I've literally never understood parents who don't let their like... TODDLER age kids play with kids of the "opposite" gender. Like wtf do you think your 3 year old is gonna get up to????? News flash heteros people aren't literally born sexual beings and you don't need to protect your sweet baby girl from the boy from her preschool class.

Which also makes boy/girl friendships later on actually LESS TABOO meaning, if your kid grew up being friends with OTHER GENDERS, they will be less likely to see others solely as potential romantic/sexual objects and can actually have positive normal friendships with people of any sex or gender. Who fucking knew that if you don't treat something as FORBIDDEN then it stops being so appealing, especially if you have a rebellious streak

[equalperson]

I fucking hate being traumatized because why am I bawling the hardest I've bawled in god-knows-how-long because someone I didn't even like that much berated Me. gasping wailing trembling and snotting over this for several minutes.

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

[lecliss]

I'll never be able to take the theory that Vincent is Sephiroth's real father seriously cuz I cannot stress enough how important I think it is to the plot that Vincent wanted to fuck Lucrecia and did not get to.

[swaghaver69]

i feel a heavy pressure like someone is sitting on my chest making it so i can’t breathe whenever i think about how every single structure in society and social conditioning makes it so that women have no choice but to inevitably end up with a male and it is pushed so hard as the only possible viable option and it feels choking and inescapable (personal rambling vent in tags)

[blye-flower]

✨Rant in the tags✨

[scarlettcryptid]

i was telling myself it was okay that i sucked at guitar hero's easy mode at the arcade earlier and that no one was even paying attention to me but then my mom said there were 3 dudes watching me when she walked in

[toytulini]

"why are people mad about AI being pushed on them when they SHOULD be mad about all the privacy erosion??"

1) plenty of us bitches are mad and annoyed about both, actually.

2) the privacy erosion has become the normalized state of existence for the average person for the last 10 fucking years at least, its snuck in, they disguise it as Convenient Features to Help You Shop Better, and thats IF they bother telling you theyre doing it, instead of just opting all your shit in without asking, its so fucking normalized that yeah, a lot of people do not bother to question it, they just sigh in resignation and go, yeah, i guess, do i even have other options? and they do, but theyre an investment of learning and time you dont have capacity for at the moment, or maybe you do but you feel like you dont bc it feels like a bigger hurdle than it is, and computer stuff is already kind of intimidating, cos man, what if you hit the wrong thing and brick your expensive ass machine? easier to just let it data harvest, you guess, it cant be THAT bad, can it? plenty of people live like this, put up with this, seek this out, its easier not to resist the privacy erosion. fucking whatever, i guess. yeah, i guess twitter i mean X, or walmart, or facebook, can just have all of my contact info and my phone number and my birthday and phone contacts and bank information and fuck it, give them my ssn while im at it. less effort later. this is just how tech has been for the last 10 yrs. no one can effectively get rage clicks on this topic anymore bc we all fucking know. it sucks and we know. what do you want me to fucking do about it? i have other shit to deal with more urgently. etc

3)

you cant turn anything on or log onto anything or go anywhere without hearing about whatever new shit theyre throwing AI at for no real reason, no one will fucking Shut Up about AI, and its Annoying, man

[girlivealwaysbean]

sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg

[medicinemane]

And maybe you'll be like "but if you don't trust businesses, how can you trust welfare?"

I fucking don't. My mom trying to get on food stamps fucked me up because a lady I never met without my permission got my SSN from my mom and started editing my files. My heart still races to this very second whenever I think about it, it kinda messed me up bad and I'll never ever ever see any kind of recourse

And I'm terrified that I'm gonna lose my medicaid just cause I inherited some money from my grandpa

And I've never even applied for disability cause it kinda doesn't matter finding out if I'd qualify or not cause of my depression, when the rules are so restrictive I don't know if I've even be allowed to keep my house

I do not fucking trust these things on a personal level. I feel like out of a lot of people I have the most to fear from them cause I'm on the edge of having things work, and that gets you punished

...but I need medicaid in order to have insurance (and when you strip out the finance side of medicaid, I love medicaid... they're honestly incredible insurance... I just... I just... dental is like 90% of why medicaid is so important to me, ever since I found out this state pays for it I've actually been able to do cleanings which is important to me cause I can't always get myself to brush)

And I think things like disability and food stamps are pretty damn important on a personal level, and honestly are also good for the economy cause they get people spending... it's practically a free cash infusion into the economy, cause these are people who need to buy stuff

There's just so much important stuff welfare does that it's worth dealing with government

No, what I want is more accountability so if someone gets my SSN from a 3rd party like my mom they're held to HIPPA styles standards where that's not ok to access my files without my permission (She changed my fucking address and tried to get medicaid to investigate me for fraud! Never even met me)

Like have some accountability there and in every situation

Secondly I want less punitive focused rules. I'd frankly prefer bezos get on disability than smack down some poor sod cause they got $2000 in the bank or cause their friend lets them live with them for free

If there's gonna be a cut off on these programs, it needs to be a solid step above the poverty line, cause... by definition I assume poverty line denotes kinda the minimum expected income people can reasonably live off of, and if you take away benefits people are gonna lose a chunk of money to covering that stuff themself, so you need a buffer before you kick people off

I don't fucking trust the government for a second, I've actively been fucked by them and on a personal level I avoid everything but medicaid and only that cause everything but the money is pleasant to deal with and I kinda need it (honestly if I was rich I'm not even kidding that I'd rather give medicaid like $400 a month than some insurance company, I sincerely like them as insurance)

But I'd trust them a lot more if they were less punitive, less out to hunt me down and gut me cause someone handed me a fiver or cause I started to get on my feet, and if government employees had concrete rules they had to follow that were actually transparent and enforced

Like 90% of my problems with welfare go away if they're held accountable and there's less "catch the welfare cheats" mentality going around

I don't trust the government in the slightest, but sadly there some jobs it kinda has to do, so I'd just rather force it to be an open book where the public can keep an eye on it and if they step out of line there's consequences (sort of like I don't trust most mega corps but happen to sometimes need stuff from them... did you know literally every cell service provider has been illegally selling shit like your location data to random people like bounty hunters, and the FCC just slapped them with a fine that's 0.02% of their yearly incomes and debated even doing that? I even can offer a source on that)

...I don't trust much of any authority cause they constantly fail me and kinda screw me. Don't trust doctors either, but I still gotta go to them, you know? ...they're just... they're real bad at listening... so many systems need systemic change

(You know who I really don't trust is the cops. I could point to so many examples. My uncle doesn't trust cops either, and he's an ex Fire and SWAT paramedic, he worked with them and we still got into a long conversation where he basically tore into them far better than I can)

(I don't trust authority that's not accountable)

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

[svnmouth]

I think getting a hysterectomy would either help with my migraine issues or just give me different problems but I wont be able to know until next year minimum and even then I dont know if I can do a second surgery so soon. the way that birth control just utterly and completely fucks you over when youre starting it, when youre on it, and when youre getting off it is so. Idk if its even worth it to change my birth control if Im gonna get a hystrectomy in the vague soonish future even if I feel like absolute dogshit for an entire month for 1/3rd of the year.

[i-like-books-and-women]

One more "hehe projection" onto Ruben post for the night.

Ruben didn't realised how fucked his mom's behavior was until he met the others. Like he'd be telling what he thought was a "cute fun story" about his childhood and finish to the others looking at him like "what the actual fuck". And he's like "what?" And they're like "dude that's so fucked up and not normal"

And the rest was Veronica hating history

[timeisacephalopod]

Every once and awhile I like to burst my mom's bubble on something and right now I'm in the process of bursting her bubble on Dr Phil, Dr oz, and Oprah and thankfully these people documentedly suck so hard it's not actually difficult for me to pull up details I remember that if looked up absolutely can be corroborated.

Anyway it's kind of a fun hobby of mine, mostly because I already burst my own bubble on these people (except Dr oz I never liked that asshole I HATED how much he constantly talked about dieting and weight loss, my LEAST favorite topic even now tbh) and it's taken me like 3 years of hint dropping to get here ok. It's been a long time coming 😂😂😭