#so that also feels y'know!

[pynkhues]

It's interesting, thinking of how Lestat's traumatic experiences influence the way he perceives and seeks love. I'm curious about your thoughts on something I've been pondering, but I don't feel like I can articulate it that well. Lestat clearly wants Louis to be attracted to him, which makes sense, presumably that's what most people want in romantic relationships. But even that feels tied up, to an extent, in all the trauma -- Magnus chose him partly for his beauty, and his looks/sexual appeal have always played a big part in how others react to him. So it feels sometimes like he thinks that's the main thing he has to offer, and that's partly why Louis not wanting to have sex much on the rat diet feels like such a rejection, like if even his body/face can't entice Louis, then he has nothing. So in the present, what would it take for Lestat to feel confident both that Louis is extremely attracted to him, AND that physical attraction/sex isn't the main reason Louis wants to be with him or the main thing he has to offer?

As I'm typing, I'm thinking that maybe this is obvious--of course most people want their partners to find them attractive AND not to feel like that's the main/only reason their partner is with them. It just somehow feels more complicated with Lestat. And I think you're already exploring this really gorgeously in your fics, actually...just by the way you show that Louis and Lestat have this insane physical connection and need for each other, but Louis keeps fighting to know Lestat on a deeper level too, and Lestat can see that. But anyway, if you had any particular thoughts in this area, I'd love to hear them.

It's definitely an interesting thing to consider, anon! Lestat's vanity is definitely a major part of his character, and while I do think it pre-dates Magnus, I agree that it's probably in part compounded by his turning. Like you said, Magnus chose him in part for his looks, and his beauty is really emphasised throughout his turning, both through Anne's prose, but also specifically through Magnus and Lestat himself.

Half of what Magnus says during his turning is about Lestat's looks, and even in the immediate aftermath, he's laid out a beautiful outfit for him to wear (red slippers and white hose and a red velvet suit worked with gold and rubies and pearls and the same Italian lace of his mother's wedding dress, which has been a fascinating detail to me since I picked it up on re-read) and Lestat spends paragraphs looking at, and admiring himself in a mirror. There's something to it that sort of feels soaked in the sense that Lestat was intended to be a kept boy, only now he has no keeper, and I suspect that's probably partially why Rolin and co have made the decision to extend it from two nights to a week.

Your ask actually brought two beats from s1 to mind - first Lestat's considerable considerables line from 1.05 when Louis' ignoring him as he searches the newspapers for Claudia, but also that tiny moment in 1.01 when he and Louis first meet and Louis makes that jab at Lestat's wardrobe that Sam lets land on Lestat's face in a way that I always love.

(And this is a sidebar, but there's an interesting thread with the clothes too in that people really do dress Lestat a lot - from the theatre troupe to Nicki giving Lestat the wolfkiller cloak, to Magnus laying out those clothes, to Louis updating his wardrobe in New Orleans, than dressing Dreamstat in his favourite suit - - it's one I think about a lot).

Both moments I think speak directly to what you're saying in that Lestat places a lot of his own value on his physicality - both in terms of his appearance and his sexuality - and so the lack of acknowledgement of either, or even a perceived slight against them, I do think is probably felt pretty deeply? It's all intrinsically tied up for him with the trauma of Magnus, yes, but I think also his freedom and ability to survive in Paris was dependent on his looks. He was beautiful enough to be on the stage, for people to want to look at him, something Nicki makes clear in the books and Armand makes clear in 2.03, and in that sense, what he looks like (and his ability to play a role that an audience wants) marks his life and his death and his rebirth in a way that probably only Armand could relate to.

So yeah, I think you're right that even beyond the natural desire to have your partner be physically attracted to you, Lestat probably needs it as a form of validation and that it probably carries a lot of weight in conversations about his self-worth. As for what it would take for him to feel confident in that? I don't know! A part of the fun with Lestat is that he's so in-the-moment that I think he'd probably pendulum between knowing exactly how much Louis wants him / is attracted to him, and being crippled by insecurity about it if, like, Louis didn't look up from his book fast enough, haha. I do think he'd probably like it when Louis dresses him though, because not to go back to that sidebar, but between those relationships (and his conviction is always that he and Magnus loved each other), I do think he probably sees that as an act of love and attraction.

And thank you for your kind words! Interestingly, the sentiment of what Lestat and Louis give each other, both sexually and otherwise, has been a thread in the cruising fic, so it was fun to get this ask and think about it a little more, haha.

[starryeyeddreamer21]

I always feel so bad for child actors that get caught up in Internet drama like It's never their fault they're just kids but you know what I mean right

The kids playing the golden trio in that new Harry Potter show (please do not watch that)

The little girl playing Lilo in the live action Lilo and Stitch (also do not watch that)

The kids in the Percy Jackson TV show (I think the show is pretty good considering it's a show based off a book lol)

The girl playing Toph in the live action atla (you will never catch me watching that show)

Hate the show, hate the movie, hate the writers but the kids are just doing what they're told

[sun-marie]

Post-canon, somewhere in a Rivaini inn, Lucanis sees more of "Rook" than he thought possible <3

Background/headcanons under the cut for context:

Background:

- Lydia Laidir, born into slavery in the Imperium, was inadvertently freed when the ship she was serving on was attacked by the Felicisma Armada, and eventually taken in by Isabela and the Lords of Fortune. Isabela gave her the affectionate nickname "Rook(ie)", and in a effort to cope with her upbringing she sought to reinvent herself under this new name. Overtime, the name Lydia became an extremely personal aspect to her, and by the time of Veilguard the only people who know her real name are Isabela and Anders (her magical mentor), and she goes by Rook exclusively to everyone else, even her partner Lucanis.

Headcanons:

- After the events of Veilguard, Spite stops reflecting Lucanis and instead takes the form of a cat (credit for this galaxy brained hc goes to @/ravioliage)

- As a mage growing up in Rivain and mentored by Anders and Justice, Lydia has learned to hear Spite in a similar way to Emmrich 💜 This makes many situations both more and less awkward.

- Shortly after the events of Veilguard, Lydia was able to pair Lucanis with a baby wyvern of his own, who he named Dolce (credit for the name goes to @/iisadiya), and when there isn't a pen outside or there's bad weather, she curls up on whatever furniture the inn provides in their room and absolutely destroys it with her claws and venom <3 Lydia and Lucanis have, on multiple occasions, had to soothe a very distressed innkeeper and pay a small fortune in damages 😔

[softerhaze]

arden aged up 🥺

and IMMEDIATELY started getting on my nerves??

don't worry guys, paloma's gonna keep him in his (spare) place

[lazylittledragon]

so uhhhhhhhh. not to be cryptic and bitchy on main but congratulations to everyone in my messages for like 5 months on being right i guess

[egophiliac]

like mother, like son, but less wholesome this time?

(I couldn't decide whether or not to put them together, so have them in all the different ways!)

[thespacesay]

apartment dwellers, or those with communal laundry situations.

feel free to explain your choice in the tags, especially how polite/impolite you view your choice.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage]

Inquisition: I spend three hours in the Hinterlands fighting bears for their leather to make new armor and weapons for my companions while tracking down every landmark for the Saga of Tyrdda Bright-Axe, Avvar-Mother. My party is Blackwall, Vivienne, and Cole. I'm exhausted. I think to myself, "I miss my man." With one last bear, I finally have enough materials.

I go back to Skyhold, but the armor/weapons and the war table missions can wait. I rush into Cullen's office. I press him for updates, and he asks me if he should be worried about the cake Sera gave him [he should], and I tell him he needs to take a break.

I take in the view as I wait for him. He arrives, and in front of all the Inquisition scouts, soldiers, and the Maker Himself, we kiss. I am content, I am satisfied. Can't wait to do it again.

Veilguard: I spend what feels like three hours fighting that damn forgotten one dragon in Necropolis that I'm clearly under-leveled for but keep trying to kill out of spite. Taash and Emmrich are in my party. I'm exhausted. I think to myself, "I miss my man." We finally kill the dragon, and as we leave, Taash and Emmrich bicker about something that I'm tuning out.

I go back to the Lighthouse. Companions have quests for me, but they can wait. I rush up the stairs and break into a sprint as I burst through the doors, dart across the courtyard to the dining hall. I find Lucanis in his pantry. He's sitting on his bed with a cup of coffee in hand.

As I approach, he lifts his head to look deeply into my eyes, and he says to me:

"I think we're getting low on onions again."

Tears well up as I realize there's no affection to be had. I leave the pantry, leave the dining hall, and go hug Assan for the 2547th time.

I didn't think it was possible to feel so touch-starved while playing a dragon age game, and yet, here I am.

[gotchibam]

Heyo! I'm opening limited number of slots again for pokemon ko-fi doodles!

If you're interested, you can check out my commissions page here: ☕ https://ko-fi.com/gotchibam/commissions

They'll be in the style similar to the art above since the lineless style I've been doing them in takes me so much time to finish 😔 Hopefully I'll be able to speed up my workflow this way 😤

Please take note I still have commissions in progress (you can view my backlog here) so it may take a while before I get to work for this batch. I hope you guys understand ;_; Thank you sm as always!! ;w;

[pushupsindraag]

sometimes i wanna clone myself just so me and twin can talk about my chemical romance

[saltpepperbeard]

hugs ed hugs ed hugs ed hugs ed hug—

[somegrumpynerd]

Actually it turns out I had more thoughts about that post that I forgot about lol

Would Nightmare actually give up his boys? Yes and no

If it was just a black and white situation of they're miserable, they don't wanna be here, they have somewhere better to be, then yes. He would leave them out to wherever they needed to be despite his own feelings and very quickly realise afterwards just how much he'd gotten used to the noise and company. I think he would get a little clingy with Dream about it, which I'm sure Dream would find very weird after everything but not unwelcome, he did miss his brother after all.

(If he couldn't attach himself to Dream's side for whatever reason, I think he might just sit in his castle and go insane. Or maybe he'd just spend all day at Ccino's trying really hard to project that he just likes the atmosphere and isn't lonely as hell)

But the thing is, most of them don't have somewhere better to be. Horror has his au, and Nightmare would keep up the supply of food even if Horror said he wanted to quit at this point, so he would understandably let him return home. Killer, Dust and Cross effectively don't have aus anymore though, and they tend to get into self-destructive habits when they're left to their own devices. (Obviously bringing Color and Epic into the mix to make sure Killer and Cross are taken care of eases matters, but Dust doesn't really have any friends outside their group he could go stay with - that Nightmare knows about at least).

The flipside of this is that his boys may not necessarily want to be given up. I think if Nightmare got really in his head about this he could easily end up convinced this is the right thing to do without ever asking them if it's what they want, with potentially terrible results. He's established such a pattern of always returning to find Killer when they get seperated, that if he never showed up Killer might just keep sitting there and waiting for him greyfriar's bobby style, refusing to leave because he's certain his boss is coming back.

[deoidesign]

One of my first digital pieces (2010) versus one of my recent ones (2024)

We all start somewhere!

[funishment-time]

this is 500000% conjecture but i wonder if the reason why V3 is so much more Bisexual than the other games (imo) is because there was apparently meant to be a Kaede version of the Dating Sim(tm) mode too* and they wanted to ensure every character made some sort of sense with both her and Shuichi at the helm in that extra mode

* don't quote me on this because i can't find the info suddenly but iirc, they just didn't have time/budget to write and implement it

[steviewashere]

Do you think when Eddie died before graduating, he came to his mom in the afterlife with apologies and she didn't want to hear them because her baby was there too early?

And in a scenario where he lived, do you think Wayne sat at Eddie's graduation and met up with him afterwards and patted him on the shoulder and hugged him really tight and said, "Your mama would be real proud of you." And then Eddie just hung his head and cried into Wayne's shoulder?

In the scenario where he did graduate, do you think Eddie went up to his mom's grave with a little lunch and a sack with a couple other things? Do you think he left her a bouquet of flowers and then presented his high school diploma? And with all the strength he could muster, in a voice too small and quiet, he told her that he finally did it? Do you think when he was a kid, he promised his mom that he'd graduate high school and go to college—probably be the first in his family to graduate from a college—and get a nice job like his mom always wanted?

Do you think he sat at her grave and played her songs because his dream changed? And before he left her for the night, he asked her to not be mad at him; for choosing to negate college, for not chasing a bigger job, for being queer and being outcast and being a person she probably didn't plan on having.

Do you think, in the scenario where he graduated and got out of Hawkins (maybe he started dating Steve or just went off on his own), he finally got the happiness he deserved? Or do you think he's spending a long time feeling guilty for being so happy—especially when he makes it to an age a year older than his mom would ever be?

Do you think Eddie's mom didn't mind at all who he was?

As long as he was happy, that's all that matters. And it kills her, from a distance (wherever she is, whatever you believe in), that he won't let himself have that without her.

[perpetual-fng]

a very rendered roach