#so much anger in such a small person
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Idc about any other headcanon, but sapphic drarry definitely has short!Harry and really-fucking-tall-for-some-reason!Draco
#speaking my truth#pls tell me i'm right#am i right or am i super right#i mean it#short harry makes absolute sense#so much anger in such a small person#the shorter she is#the more hellish she'll be#ugh i love her#fictional gay people on my phone#drarry#sapphic drarry#fem!drarry
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Question for the DP fandom:
Do you think Danny’s hair turns white when it falls out? It’s technically dead cells anyway but when it naturally falls off his head, do you think it turns white? Because I think it would be hilarious if his hairbrush just has white hair, no black strands whatsoever, and his significant other thought the worst until they know his secret.
#danny phantom#dp x dc#dc x dp#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc crossover#danny fenton#dc x dp au#sorry it’s a no thoughts head empty kind of night#I know it’s a dumb thing to think about#but it was a shower thought and sometimes those are good#I just think it could bring so much angst to the plot#any plot#like Tim or Damian or whoever you want his significant other to be could think the worst#it would be something they’d notice for sure#could even be Tucker until Sam reminds him that he’s an idiot and their idiot boyfriend turns into a ghost#or it could be another small thing Jazz has to explain away to their parents#she makes up a whole person that is friends with Danny and it becomes a thing#I know it’s gaslighting and I’m not sure she’d do it but it’d be funny#his name is Garrett and he’s one of Danny’s best friends mom. Jeez how do you not know this#or what if Jason’s hair turns white too and that’s when it clicks for Jazz that he is not completely human#if Jazz is liminal her hair could be blue and boy would that be fun to explain#HER HAIR IS BLUE AND SHE HAS FEELINGS ABOUT IT OKAY#all caps on purpose#because I for sure would be freaking out if my hair was the wrong color in the hairbrush#I would purposely pluck a strand and watch it change then freak out#anger management ship#hardcover ship#everlasting trio
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Life is beautiful
#wrote I two years ago after scratching a hole in my arm#yeah personal art inspired by a vent doodle on my Italian notes from two years ago#I used to feel so much anger it physically hurt my lungs#literally burning on the inside typa thing#and today I woke up thinking about the small sun character hugging the flowers I drew#I wanted them like that#it made me happy#very self indulgent#but it makes me happy#fight club#soapshipping
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i am glad drake is being called out and i’m glad kendrick is doing exactly that but i can’t help but notice that men are only quick to label other men they hate as predators and not their very own friends.
its a valid way to feel but when trying to analyze peoples actions possible political results i find its better off to try to lock away ones own feelings about the entire system. its unfair.
like ive seen many people upset along the lines of "so kendricks just coming out with these serious allegations just cuz theyre beefing. men only care about womens violence to dunk on other men" and while thats a valid way to feel about the culture, about the general, the majority, about men, cuz we literally see this happen around us, etc etc we literally cant apply it to individuals baselessly.
i have 0 idea what the circumstances were and what kendrick was thinking through this whole thing, WHAT I DO KNOW is that its literally historic someone with this kind of platform is so ruthlessly coming after someone else from the industry with very clearly stated accusations. its so ugly but in Hollywood, you have actors and directors revealed as sex offenders or in lawsuits of sexual violence OR EVEN COMPLETELY OFF THE GRID unacceptable behavior and no one breathes out a word on it. its tradition directors take advantage of women to give them roles. tradtion to write naked scenes for women they want naked. but everyones tail is caught in everyones mouth, so people whose brands are wholesome or "progressive" stay silent to stay employed. its all very hushed.
ive never seen a man this popular and widely respected openly call another man a misogynist. like i said before, its not that Kendrick Lamar is some Feminist Scholar King, its that the action, the angle is surprisingly pro-woman. in times feminist sentiment gets so much backlash and is so unpopular with general audiences i was pleasantly surprised by the way he spoke of women. thats it.
#mypost#kendrick lamar#drake#k.#like i HAVE to approach peoples behaviors with as much neutral grace as i can because...#i find when one let their anger about ''men'' ''patriarchy'' ''misogyny'' seep into judging any individiual man they sound like a terf...#cuz im so mad and so hurt and need everyone to ACTUALLY Be feminist scholars and ACT in womens sake#that i lose grasp of the common person. that we all grow up In A Society. with sexist coding. that it takrs so long to unlearn#thats if you are even somehow driven to do so by circumstances partially out of your control#so yeah. sadly if i judge men on having read at least one 1 single feminist book and understood it.....and i killed those who didnt?#id have to kill all men i know#so yeah! lets take our small dub. kendrick lamar killed that predator lol
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Kobra Kid… thinking about Kobra Kid..
Kobr……. Oaugh… specifically:
#venom bros or funkobra or any of themm ughh#I am the 1 ultimate self sacrificial idiot martyr kobra guy#autistic kid with anger issues that has fucked up indescribably in his life but boy does he love his friends#and he hates himself so so so much and all his mistakes but he takes no shit and in the end#in the end all his assholesness all his past mistakes and current issues go out the window because he’s willing to sacrifice himself#he hates himself and everything he’s ever done but there’s a small handful of people or there’s that one person that’s always been by his#side and seen past his facade and the time comes and he doesn’t think twice#and he sacrifices himself and for once he doesn’t regret his actions#it’s something he can live with that he can take to the end he’s proud of it he’s proud of himself#he feels he’s redeemed himself#even tho he didn’t really have to he didn’t have to prove himself he didn’t mess up as much as he thought he did but proved himself anyway#and in the end really just proved himself to himself#and just cemented that keeping his family safe is like his purpose. he’d die for it#he’d die for them#like fuck the world fuck his own life they are his life he just needs them to be okay#anyway.yeah the Kobra song ever. I could keep going#on and on and on#ttlotfk#danger days#the true lives of the fabulous killjoys#kobra kid#Spotify
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wish i could be angry without feeling bad
#Obviously it's important to not be too clouded by emotions when communicating that you are upset#As in. Not lashing out#But idk maaan i don't wanna feel like i always have to measure every single word i say to be as little angry as possible#Yesterday during a feedback round for writing where everybody was supposed to only say one positive thing they liked#A friend absolutely tore into my writing saying that the narrative voice was unbearable and pretentious#And it was like. Bestie this is not what i asked for#N i told them that but the anger lingered#So i texted them again n said that it really wasn't okay#When in a group of five everybody says one small thing they liked and one person rants on about how much everything sucked#That leaves a negative feeling. Sorry#And i texted that text to a friend n she said 'well i think you might be a bit too into it they didn't say everything sucked'#And it's like. Ok i could have worded that differently in hindsight but the point still stands!!! And WHY can't i be angry#It was a decent message overall considering i cried about the whole thing
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It is so incredible to be able to leave a situation, center and ground myself, and start recovering my energy, mental focus, and peace within minutes to an hour. What other people said or did wasn’t about me, I behaved well myself, I let things roll off as much as possible during the situation, and as soon as it was over I started doing nervous system first aid. What a difference living this way makes. Life is so much more peaceful when you actually protect boundaries, keep perspective, and care for yourself while properly in tune with your needs.
#right now I need slow breathing and Enya#yesterday I needed two hours straight of EDM and jump dancing#and I clocked BOTH of those things so my body and brain are much happier#I could’ve been burnt out and stressed and partly dissociated this weekend#but I’m NOT GONNA BE#and it was that simple. just knowing what to do and checking in with myself#frequently enough to know when I need it.#imagine if I learned how to do this in grade school!!! I’m so happy some kids get to grow up like this#and have the freedom and tools from their caregivers to actually do it right too#that number of kids is increasing every year and in a couple generations it’s gonna be a LOT#we’re so fucking lucky guys#we get to be alive at a real turning point in how humanity views and treats small humans#and how those small humans behave and live when they grow up#the world is going to become so much more beautiful#and it’s already pretty cool despite the unresolved anger and pain most of us currently live with#personal#trauma recovery
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kate and yelena watch an episode of friends together and yelena tells kate she “does not care for these american shows” but when yelena falls asleep kate decides to watch a few more episodes without her and kate and is met with a very annoyed yelena in the morning complaining to lucky and fanny about how kate watched more without her and how she will be lost with the plot now
#kate wonders how so much anger can be in such a small person#but she loves her so it’s worth it#kate bishop#yelena belova#marvel#hawkeye#pizza dog#lucky#yelena my beloved#yelena black widow#and kate and yelena#happy pride 🌈#wlw#fanny dog#bishova#pride month#gay marvel#gay#pride#wlw pride#kate bishop x yelena belova#bishlova#yelena boleva
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I love Sydney because you hear her speak for the first time and she has this high-pitched middle school voice in a young adult body and you're like "...she sounds adorable. Will she be okay?" And she will be okay because she's more than capable, has new ideas, and is trying her best to pull everyone together without asking them to radicalize themselves. She's not a super genius but she knows what she's doing because she worked hard to learn and that's SO important!!
#*grabs you all by the collars*#watch Sydney and you'll have a 95% accurate idea of who I am irl#my brother was watching season one with me and before episode two was over he said Syndey reminded him of me#we even had the same incident trying to lift a giant container of liquid we were much too small to lift#difference being I knew my limits and got someone else to do it and she rejected help out of anger#also the entire thing with proposing thought out ideas for change and having them instantly disregarded 😭#I've never felt so seen in my entire LIFE#I mean we even dress the same!!#I don't really care for Ayo Edebiri as a person but Syndey Adamu my beloved 🫶#the bear fx
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anytime I'm like "Roo is actually kinda more like Randy than Leo is..." I remember no. I'm much more likely to see Roo aiming a gun (despite his sheer lack of knowledge in anything gun related) than Leo. Roo is more likely to vent his anger and go about things physically, because often words fail him where physical actions wouldn't (kinda like how Benson punches Randy in the stomach, emphasizing the importance of reacting to certain things instead of not reacting at all) and Leo is MUCH more likely to vent and go about things verbally, because of how he was raised with a very verbally aggressive parent, and because he has a much stronger and heard voice, so things he says are gonna have a lot more emphasis than Roo who is more soft spoken.
#[ Hiraeth ]#Hiraeth : Roo#Roo#Hiraeth : Leo#the passenger#Does this in a way imply what kinda of person Roo could be? Yes. absolutely. but hes not gonna be like that.#He IS physically aggressive. but he manages his emotions and this is very rarely apparent. especially since Roo is more-#-likely to feel sadness than anger.#Leo is more likely to get angry and explosive but he also tries to be quiet and “”small“” (as far as small goes with his build)-#-and i think that aligns much more with Randy. who is quiet and small and is probably more prone to be verbally aggressive#oh plus Roo and Benson have similar hinted to trauma so theres also that lmao#Leo and Randy both have controlling mothers... but in different ways. Leos mother is controlling because of just who she is and -#-what she wants and expects outta leo and bc of generational trauma/expectations :T#Randys mom is controlling because of his trauma so 🧍♂️#anyways. we love to see a crossover oc and character analysis over here on the youredreamingofroo blog#yapping
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YEAH........... YEAH..... LIKEWISE, NO NOTES AT ALL, THAT'S EXACTLY IT... Main antagonist deaths are often treated as "comeuppance," but that would be the ultimate comeuppance for Aoki. As it stands, the only people who actually suffer for it are Ichiban and Jo, and Ichi didn't even do anything wrong. Also please I'm positive there's more to wring out of Aoki and Jo for an essay 😭😭at the very least, I always love to hear your perspective!
"he'd made a social circle for himself where people predominantly liked him for the power and influence" <- incredibly Mine-core of Aoki btw (I also feel the rest applies a little in terms of Mine probably being very quick to write off people who Do care about him as not caring about him, as with Katase, but it's nowhere near the extent of the Arakawas)
Wait actually it's kind of funny... for both Mine and Aoki, I was so sure their endings would go a certain way. Mine and Kiryu'd fight Richardson off together and Ichi'd, I don't know, shield Aoki or hug him so Kume couldn't get to him in the first place, or after that INSANE direct parallel to Arakawa running to the hospital with Masato, he'd miraculously pull through like he did on New Year's. Tormented with visions of the better timeline... With Aoki in particular, it makes me want to tear my hair out because the moment of him choosing to put the gun in the locker was REVOLUTIONARY for the series, looking at the characters he was most heavily based on.
Anyway. Bottom line. These bitches need to hug it out. It was so evil Arakawa didn't hug Ichi at Omi HQ or on the waterfront like bro stop being """manly""" for five seconds you're ruining my life you're ruining your own lives
There'd genuinely be nothing more painful yet more satisfying for an antagonist than being confronted with the consequences of their actions and having to navigate life after having making those decisions, ESPECIALLY when it comes to mending the bonds that- for anyone else- would have shattered long ago. With Aoki being motivated by the want to be loved and appreciated for himself, it would've been nice to see him finally acknowledge that he did have that love and start to better himself as a result (however much he'd be able to while in prison anyway lmao).
The Mine and Aoki comparisons are so real though, I remember joking to myself about it days after beating the game but it just fuels my mental illness every time I think about it ☠️ I LEGALLY AM NOT ALLOWED TO GO OFF ABOUT THE Y7 ENDING I'VE DONE IT TOO MUCH it makes me so mad every time I think about it 😭 ESPECIALLY THE PARALLELS WITH ARAKAWA AND THE LOCKERS UGGGHHH IT COULD HAVE BEEN SUCH AN EPIC CONCLUSION WITH THAT... Arakawa running from the lockers at the start of Aoki's life compared to Ichiban running from the lockers and getting Aoki to the hospital so Aoki can restart life I'm Going To Kill Someone (myself) (in Minecraft)
#snap chats#theres a note here about aoki's self hatred and ergo his inability to believe people could love him without 'worth'#and some kind of. I Dont Know occurs that comes with aoki accepting that love and ergo At Least Tolerating himself#and again becoming better as a person as a result. not WHOLLY you cant undo Everything Wrong With Him with one therapy session#but itd at least be a start and thats far more than anything else rgg has given since like. ryuji in dead souls#but w/e i- as per usual- have the vocabulary of a walrus so we're just gonna have to imagine i said something profound#AND THE LACK OF HUGGING IN THIS FRANCHISE IM GOING TO STAB ALL OF YOU. IN MINECRAFT.#with the power of delusions and this like seven-year-old wacom tablet i can fix that......#it'll never be enough it'll never fill the void in my soul but it'll be something i guess#BUT UGH NO SORRY IM JUST MAD NOW#nothing in my life has ever genuinely triggered anger in me than the y7 ending its just soooooooOOOOO#IT WAS SOOO CLOSE TO BEING PERFECT I CANT#im going to give myself a blood clot thinking about it anymore i feel my heart stopping Do Not Call An Ambulance I Cannot Afford It#so to stop myself from going in any more debt than i already am..... the possibility of any essays from me are very small#my ability to use words is near non existent. i feel like a right ninny sometimes#in any case im not sure what else i could expand on that isn't restating what you've said#cant ever be upset with bein on the same wavelength tho it gives my inarticulate ass a helluva easier time trying to explain LMAO#plus im petrified of trying to interpret anything from the english dub or english subs#and looking into language use is Very Much important when dissecting abusive relationships#i guess there's always just talking about general actions committed and not inspecting the exact words used#idk.. at the very least ill rotate the concept in my head and then fend off the urge to eat my teeth#i'm gonna throw up.... im still thinking of it........ gonna make an unrelated-but-arguably-related post in like three seconds#dont look at it its cringe
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#im feeling angsty about the christian god today#the religious trauma i've recieved from the church im still forcefully dragged into each sabbath makes me nauseous#i and many others like me have lost so much thanks to the churches who have prosecuted and demonized us#idk why#but it annoys me#to see people get away with so many heinous acts against another person under the excuse of “religion”#idk#just something that keeps me up at night#and angers me to my very core#a small conversation i had with a close friend made these thought arise once more
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been reflecting on the kind of person I've become after these past 3 years since the anniversary of me leaving is coming up
I looked at your blog because I was trying to find images of Bennett's design... ended up going on a rabbit hole. idk if you've looked at my blog before but I haven't so much as peeped at yours in years, I stopped like a month after it happened because it was making me so much worse mentally
I dunno if you still feel that way about us, but I'm fine with you disliking me. I did a lot of fucked up shit and I'm sorry, you deserve to be mad. even though a general lack of understanding of boundaries bc of my upbringing and autism could excuse SOME behaviors, there's still a lot of shit that I can't excuse.
something I'm especially sorry about was treating your issues like they weren't as big as mine. I realize now how much you were suffering, and I was too blindsided by my own mental illness to see how terribly you were feeling and how unsupported you were. I remember feeling like I had to placate you because if I didn't things would fall apart again, and that isn't fair to you. I treated your feelings like an inconvenience and that you werent smart enough to get what was going on because I supposedly had so much more experience in suffering. that's not what good friends do to other friends.
anyway. I don't know if you'll ever read this or see it or whatever, but. I don't know how I feel about you. you represent the memories of a lot of pain from around that time in my mind. I don't HATE you, but I'd rather not think about you for too long. I'm very happy to see that you seem to be doing way better, though. you deserve that, and don't let shitty people like I was in the past hold you back
I think it might be interesting to catch up. if that's ever something you'd be fine with doing. I dunno of I'd be comfortable with it myself but whatever. I still think of you, and most of those thoughts are just "I hope they're doing okay".
please keep creating
#vent#vent cw#venty vent#this isn't a majorly negative vent but i'm just Thinkin#bc ive been through a lot these past 6 or 7 years. so so much in such a small amount of time#and i've changed VERY VERY VERY much.#did i ever tell you the part of reason we called me red was because i had a fiery angry temper?#i was a hurt kid and i took that out on people i cared deeply about..#anyway tbh i don't remember a lot of what i did off the top of my head other than major things#god. lil tonic was so. angry and hurt and didn't realize what was going on or why#i have a much better understanding of who to be mad at now to say the least#and all of that anger over how i was treated has washed away to reveal anger for how others were treated#i dont know what lil rox would think of me but i#*i'm willing to listen to her#also i've been drawing my old persona and thinking about bored game so that's also made me contemplative over this#bored game is about coming to terms with your past i feel like turning red into pen and exploring those scars serves the narrative well#there's someone currently in my life who reminds me of this person and i'm trying my best to not repeat oast mistakes#you both deserve better than that#you'll probably end up finding me thru ben's blog
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negativity ahead be cautious
is feeling indescribably shitty every single day even more so than normal for the past three months seasonal depression even if there are only 2 seasons in your country
#repressed anger is a b#i think i am gonna reach my limit for this half of the year very soon#anger management issues + avoidant attachment style is like the most bad person thing ever#i mean if you have those you're not a bad person don't listen to me#i am so tired#my eczema and gastrointestinal issues are flaring up like crazy#which means my anxiety is getting worse and worse because it's the only reason i have so many physical health issues in the first place#senior year is effing me up#and i have the shittiest most anger-inducing history teacher known to man replacing my old history teacher#who wants us to do group presentations to cover the entire fucking rest of the syllabus that my old teacher didn't cover#because this fossil is so lazy to teach that everytime she enters the class it's a 50/50 chance that she gives a “back in my days” lecture#for either half the class or the entire class#i genuinely cannot even tolerate my parents anymore#it was easier to suck it up back when i didn't have many issues#but now i genuinely can't hold myself back from snapping at them#now the least hostile route i can go is feigning ignorance#ignoring them and trying not to appear in their line of sight#or staying in my room for as long as possible so I don't have to make contact with them#okay maybe it is my fault that my stomach literally eats itself every day#but if it helps me not unalive myself then i gotta do what i gotta do if ya know what i mean#can't i just sleep for the entire year#i bet my friends hate me for not replying to their texts for weeks#i was sleeping is such a shitty excuse#but i do sleep 16 hours a day#i genuinely can't do anything so i avoid everything by sleeping#the sound of my mom's voice amplified by the small space in the car actually triggers me#i hate it so fucking much when people sexualise arlecchino#she is not someone low scum like you can touch#and i think I've just been sucking up other people's negativity like a negativity vacuum#because my empathetic ass can't stand to see someone suffering without feeling their emotions
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"tears"
fluff for the sukuna fans bc i've been in a soft sukuna mood
ryomen sukuna x reader
Synopsis: sukuna isn't a stranger to arguments with you, but when he catches you crying after a particularly harsh one, he finds himself scrambling to fix it... in his own way
to sum it up: sukuna is an asshole but he loves you, so he tries his best
WC: 3,296
Warning(s): a lil angst
You knew exactly what you were getting into when you first started a relationship with the infamous king of curses, but that didn’t mean it hurt any less when his tendency to be an asshole hurt your feelings.
You know Sukuna isn’t a sentimental person who cares much for things like verbal reassurance, or consideration for the way the things he says can impact you, or anyone for that matter, but damn! Sometimes, he’s just too much of a jerk for you to handle, and Sukuna himself has no idea why your fragile human emotions sway you to be so affected by him. He doesn’t even think he’s said anything wrong the times in which you grow angry with him.
Now, Sukuna can handle your anger. Anger is good. Anger means that there is something he can react to, something he can tame or involve into your intimacies when he takes your mind off of silly arguments or subdues your attitude over what he deems to be small inconveniences. Anger is the only human emotion that he has felt himself in his many years of existence, so he knows what to expect. He understands it. He’s not, in the slightest, intimidated by it.
But what Sukuna finds he can not handle is the sound of your sniffles that resound from behind your door after you’ve just slammed it into his face. Sukuna angles his brows, pressing his ear to the door in confusion. Are you… cold? Coming down with a fever? What the hell are you sniffing your nose so much for?
Then he hears the meek gasps that intercept, the vocalization of pain that creeps into your weakened inhalations that accompany your damned sniffling. That’s when he realizes that you’re crying, and his pupils shrink slightly knowing that he has gone a little too far this time.
Hell, how is he supposed to handle you crying? He can’t fuck your sadness away like he can with your irritation. He can’t mirror your sadness, since he has no clue what the hell it’s supposed to feel like. He can’t empathize with it either, for he has no idea what he could have done to bring tears to your eyes and empathy, well, it’s not in his vocabulary to begin with. It’s pathetic, he thinks, the way you have allowed him to bother you this much…
Yet it kills him to know that he’s the reason behind your tears.
He stands there for some time, unsure of what to do. Should he get Uraume to handle this? No, that may make things worse. You may want to be alone.
He turns to leave, but something stops him. He feels an ache in his chest, pressing his hand to his bicep. What the hell? What is this feeling?
He can still hear you crying, and somehow, it sounds like it’s getting worse, louder, or perhaps that is all in his head. He can no longer tell, but that sound you’re making is the only thing occupying his mind, and it’s ruining him. It’s making his chest tighten, his brow furrow, his lips press together tightly. He should leave, but he doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to abandon you like this.
Never once in his life has Sukuna felt remorse. Not even for all the times he has made you angry in the past when you two have had arguments. He is so quick to blame your reactions to things on your feeble human emotions. He is so quick to evade responsibility, or more so, refrain from guilting himself over the things he is responsible for. He is so quick to dismiss you, but it’s always fine because he has never witnessed you grow sad over his behavior, not until now.
Sukuna turns back to your door slowly. His hand flies to grab the handle to throw the door open, but he hesitates. He’s unsure of what’s happening to him, for he’s never hesitated before in his life. This, you crying, him second guessing himself, it’s all so new and he hates it. He needs to fix this immediately.
What do you humans like when you are upset? There’s a word that’s slipping his mind, one he always hears you pester him for but turns down repeatedly. He had found the concept so irrelevant that he hadn’t even bothered to recall what it’s called.
He crosses his arms and stares ahead harshly in thought, then it comes to him. An apology! Yes, that’s what it is. But of course, you can’t expect him to verbalize such a thing. You must want something as a gift. A physical representation of his desire not to see you cry. He rushes off to locate Uraume for preparations.
About an hour later, you’re curled up on your bed and facing the wall with a blank stare. Your tears stopped a while ago, and since you hadn’t heard from Sukuna, you assumed he just didn’t care about your feelings. Like always.
“Oi,” a gruff voice through the door startles you. You jump and turn over, curling your brows in confusion at the sound of Sukuna’s voice. For a moment, you don’t believe he is speaking to you, so you wait some time to see if he will speak again. “I know you can hear me in there,” his voice sounds again, and you groan.
“Go away,” you tell him, flipping back over.
Sukuna, on the other side of the wall, clicks his tongue in agitation. “Quit your pouting and come open this door.”
“No. Until you learn how to treat me better, I don’t want to see you.”
Treat you better? Sukuna doesn’t understand this nonsense. You live in his large estate, you’re pampered by servants, showered with gifts and homemade meals, you sleep by his side every night, and he allows you to disrespect him far more often than he should. Not to mention, he has his arms full of presents at this very moment that are preventing him from opening the door himself. How can he possibly treat you any better than he’s already treating you?
He growls lowly and closes his eyes in irritation. “If you open the door, your mood will improve.”
“I don’t want anything other than what I just said.”
Sukuna’s eye twitches. Why are you so damn difficult? “What is your-”
“Go. Away.”
Oh. Alright, then.
You sit up abruptly when Sukuna’s foot breaks in the door with a loud crash. You stare with wide eyes, the door, now off its hinge, creaking open weakly to reveal the king of curses with his arms full of several bouquets of flowers.
“What the fuck, Sukuna?!” you cry. He only stares frustratedly as he walks into the space univinted.
“This was going to go on for too long if I hadn’t done something,” he says, approaching the side of your bed.
“You can’t just- fuck! What is wrong with you?”
Okay… this is already going poorly.
This is not the reaction he had desired from you, and perhaps he should have revisited the idea of kicking in the door, but he had been growing impatient. Despite his big talk, he doesn’t like when you speak to him in such a cold way. He doesn’t like being separated from you. He doesn’t like not being able to see your face, and after all the work he has just done to collect these plants for you, he can not tolerate being turned away.
“Must you be so dramatic?” he tsks. “Do you not see what I have brought to you? Don’t you humans like these things?”
You stare at him incredulously, mouth agape. Sukuna can see the tear stains clear on your face, and his heart clenches again. God, why is that sight so abominable?
He holds his arms out, presenting the flowers to you as if you could have possibly missed them. “They are yours. Take them and be done with this.”
“Be done with what, Sukuna?” you shake your head, face scrunched.
“With your tantrum- your tears, and the sniffles. Be done with them now. Here.”
You scoff. “Do you even know why you're giving these to me?”
Sukuna raises a brow. “To cease your tantrum. As I just said.”
“I can’t with you sometimes, Sukuna. Honestly.”
“This is really the thanks that I get for bringing you these damn flowers? I thought you were supposed to like things like this. Why would you make me waste my time?”
“If you think it’s a fucking waste of time to bring me flowers, then there’s your problem right there,” you raise your voice, pointing at him accusingly. Sukuna’s face hardens. He thinks you’re getting angry again, but he can still see the sadness behind your eyes. You look almost… defeated. “And if you knew me at all, you’d know that I never cared about any of that stuff. I never cared about the flashiness or the gifts or whatever the fuck.”
Sukuna lowers his hands, letting the bouquets drop carelessly to the floor. “Now you are accusing me of not knowing you?” he seethes. “I’m not sure when you decided that it was acceptable for you to speak to me this way, but I will not tolerate it. I do nothing but dote on you, you ungrateful brat.”
“Yeah, sure, you dote on me, and then you turn around and berate me and call everything I feel stupid because you don’t care to even try to understand why some of the things you say are not okay!”
Sukuna walks closer to invade your personal space, leaning in to glare angrily at you as you do the same. This is what he knows. This is what he chooses to respond to. Not the curl in your brow, not the tremble of your lips, not the unsteadiness of your voice, but your anger. “Why should I care if all you do is whine,” he grumbles.
You clamp your mouth shut as a lump forms in your throat. Sukuna watches you unravel before him, and while he tries to keep an unmoved expression, he is internally panicking when he sees your eyes gloss over again and your nose flare.
Shit. He’s supposed to be making you feel better. How has he gone and made things worse again? Why is he incapable of understanding how to be what you want him to be?
You take in a trembling inhale as your hands clench and unclench at your sides. You don’t want him to see you cry. You don’t want him to call you weak, but you can’t help the tear that breaks past your lashes and dashes down your cheek, a physical display of your heartache.
Sukuna’s crimson eyes fly to the tear, and his brows smooth out against his intent.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
You’re crying again, and it’s his fault. It’s always been his fault. What is this now that he’s feeling? Regret? Shame? Is that what is clawing at his chest and stripping him of his resolve? Making him wish to replay this entire interaction so that you do not appear before him with tears in your eyes once more? Is this what it is to fall?
You rub angrily at your eyes and huff, turning away from him and plopping back down on your bed, back facing him. You shut yourself away, close yourself off, and deprive Sukuna of your pretty face for the second time today. “Just leave me alone. You’ve made it perfectly clear that you don’t give a fuck about me or anything, for that matter.”
Sukuna’s eyes widen slightly with the deepening of his frown. That ache he has felt in his chest spreads throughout his body, serving as tension in his back, head, and shoulders. You think he doesn’t care for you? What nonsense. You’re the only being on this planet who has made a millennia of existence worth living, and you think he doesn’t care?
Sukuna can not even pin the blame onto you this time around. He can not accuse you of overreacting, nor can he evade such a thing that is so clearly his doing. He has made you feel uncared for, and while his temper may get out of hand, and his inability to fully comprehend the plagues of the human mind gets in the way, and he never tells you that he loves you, making you feel unloved is the last thing he ever meant to do.
“Hey,” he mumbles, but you do not move. You cling to yourself for comfort because you do not believe he can provide any for you. “Brat-” he starts, but rethinks. He reaches his hand out to you. “(Y/n). Enough of this.”
“I don’t want to see you right now, Sukuna. Can’t you respect at least that for once?” you croak.
His hand freezes and he lets it fall. Respect. Understanding. That is what you want from him, and he has not been giving it to you. He has not been giving you anything that you request of him emotionally, for that matter. He has been neglecting your mental needs whilst overpowering you with the physical, and it’s drawn you away from him.
He could force you to get up. He could drag you by your hair to his bedroom. He could make you look him in the eye, make you stay with him, make you stay silent about this from this point on and forever more. Sukuna has the power and the authority to do so…
But the idea is not appealing. Not in the slightest.
Sukuna wants you happy. He wants you to want to be with him willingly, and if he ignores your consent now of all times, it would be like throwing away the life he has built with you. Throwing away your desires, and Sukuna does not long for a world in which you are any more uncomfortable than you already are.
He takes a step back, looking over the flowers that he has dropped, and accepts the will of the mortal he fell in love with.
“I will be in my chambers if or whenever you wish to see me,” he says lowly, giving in. He moves to leave but stops himself once more. He never had stopped himself this much before. “...I apologize for making you cry. I will send someone to fix your door immediately.”
Sukuna is well on his way when he hears you shuffling behind him. He turns, admittedly hopeful for your reaction, and finds you peeking in confusion over your shoulder. “...What did you just say?” you whisper.
The king of curses stalls, looking directly into your eyes from across the room. He feels suddenly… weak. Vulnerable. For the first time, he has relented his power for you to take hold of, and it feels strange to say the very least. “Do you wish for me to repeat myself?”
You sit up slowly, turning around. You knuckle at your red nose, watching him suspiciously. “I do. I may have misheard you.”
He studies you for a moment until he realizes that you are being facetious. “You heard me the first time.”
“Maybe I just want you to say it again.”
Sukuna sighs heavily. “I did not intend to make you cry, nor did I intend to make you feel as though I do not care for you. That is a foolish thought, but I understand I do not convey the depth of my feelings for you the way you wish me to convey it.”
You look dumbfounded as you stare at him in silence. Sukuna clicks his tongue, unsure of how you are going to respond.
“Quit staring at me and say something, woman.”
“I just… never thought…” you trail off, swallowing harshly. “I never thought you would ever say something like that to me.”
“You will only hear me say such things when you are- when I’ve made you unhappy,” he clarifies firmly. Your nose twitches, an involuntary movement that Sukuna catches and finds entirely too adorable. Your eyes are still damp, but your breathing has evened out.
“That’s the first,” you quip.
“Enough.”
You press your lips together, glancing at the flowers Sukuna brought you. Just then, you notice that they are your favorite.
You tell yourself you knew what you were getting into when you first started dating the king of curses, but at times you forget that Sukuna is in fact a demon, and a king at that. He does not believe in any better than what he is.
“You hurt my feelings, Sukuna,” you say softly. “Don’t you get what that means? At least for me?”
“No,” he responds honestly. “But I do see now that you have different needs. And I understand that I refuse to watch you cry if there is something I can do about it.”
You try to remain angry with him. You try to keep yourself distanced, but you can not help the way that you are softening, and Sukuna notices. A hint of a smirk curves at the corner of his lips.
“Is that all I had to say to make this better?”
“Shut the hell up,” you hiss. “It wouldn’t have killed you to apologize for the hundreds of other times we’ve fought, you know.”
“You weren’t crying the other times, woman.”
“It doesn’t matter,” you roll your eyes.
Sukuna tilts his head, placing a hand on his hip. “You’re not still upset, are you?”
“Yes,” you pout, and he catches on.
“What is it you want now, to be pampered like a spoiled brat?”
He makes the suggestion as if to offend you, but the two of you both know that he is hardly making a joke. “What I want is for you to fuck off.”
A chuckle rumbles in Sukuna’s throat as he makes his way over to you. You immediately break and screech when he yanks you forward by your ankle and loops you up into his arms before sitting down on your bed and setting you in his lap.
He looks you dead in the eye and lifts a rough thumb, swiping stubbornly at your tear stains and your damp lashes. “Crybaby,” he mutters, and you swat his hand away.
“Whatever, asshole.” You push at his chest with weak contempt and he looks at you boredly.
“You’re pitiful,” he grumbles, gripping your chin securely and guiding it to him. His blood red eyes seep into yours, gazing intently. “No more tears, do you understand?”
“Then don’t make me sad.”
“I won’t,” he tells you confidently.
A smile twitches on your lips as you look over him, completely unfamiliar with this side of the king of curses. “Can you do one more thing for me, and then I’ll maybe think about forgiving you?” you bite your lip, pressing your finger to his broad shoulder.
Sukuna grunts. “More demands, huh? I suppose you know how to take advantage of a situation. What more do you want?”
You wrap your arms over his neck. “Tell me how much you care about me,” you sing.
“Did I not just do so?”
“No, I want you to spell it out. Tell me you love me.”
“I highly tolerate you.”
“Tell me you loveeee me.”
“You are the only human being I do not frown upon.”
“Sukuna.”
“Christ, woman, you’re mine. Isn’t that enough?” he grits his teeth and you snort, patting his cheek gently.
“For now.”
“Such a pest, you know that?” he mumbles, pushing in swiftly to press his lips firmly to yours in a swift peck. “Don’t ever say I don’t care for you again. It is the most false and offensive thing I have ever heard."
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fanfic#anime#jjk fandom#jjk#jjk season 2#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#sukuna ryomen#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna ryomen x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen x you#ryomen x reader#sukuna x reader fluff#sukuna x y/n#sukuna angst
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Some pictures from my 4 day/3 night fishing trip 🎣
#it was a good trip but we had the worst luck#i slipped on some mud and went ass up on the river bank day one before i even casted my rod#we found spots with decent fish on the radar but none were biting#we spent an hour at one spot until dad finally got a catfish (much to everyones anger. i didn't understand but we immediately moved on)#(dad called them the scum of the river so lots of hard feelings there)#the crab nets got one prawn and one small catfish#i got snagged and dad snapped the rod trying to fix it#dad finally hooked a barramundi on day 3 (day 2 in the boat) but it got away taking 2/3 hooks off his lure somehow (more anger)#and waiting at the ramp for my bil to get the car dad lost one final lure to a snag#but we didnt get burned!!#my hands are a bit red but compared to last time thats really bloody good#personal#mine
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