#so ill shut myself out

[illmetbymoonlight]

Today I received the only real birthday card I'll get. The other is from Hallmark with a coupon.

Sometime I wonder what I did wrong in life that my life ended up being so God damned pathetic...

My birthday is in a few days and instead of being a happy occasion it's just a bleak reminder of how alone I really am.

I'll officially be in my mid thirties with nothing to show for my life. No friends. No partner/significant other. No major accomplishments. Nothing. Just a family that more than occasionally treats me like garbage and a lack of a will to live. My life is just a big void.

[dorothywonderland]

BRO LITERALLY DOXXED HIMSELF TO THE CYCLOPS. he was asking to get jumped come on

[off-mozzarella]

A lil something for Whumptober day 10: blow to the head

[usagichanp]

Me when Viktor Arcane fic writers include scenes highlighting the reality of living with chronic pain/disabilities

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[doubledyke]

i know it's probably a bad idea to date someone based on a shared hyperfixation but i really wanna date someone based on a shared hyperfixation

[geddy-leesbian]

just going to be bitchy on main one last time before making myself go to bed

For real idk why the fuck I'm still bothering with my high effort location/details screenshot compilation posts when I can just make lower effort posts that get SIGNIFICANTLY more notes. Like why the fuck should I even bother to spend at least a couple hours curating screenshots for part 2 of Luis's lab details which will get a maximum of 50 notes when I could just spend like 20 minutes making a few gifs like this and get HUNDREDS of notes

[megumi-fm]

.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Honestly your tags are so fun to read every time, i'm almost more excited for them than the actual post (but not entirely because your art is SO GOOD!!!! i adore it). If you don't mind me asking, what are you studying?

i am studying psychology because i refuse to see a therapist so ill figure out whats wrong with me myself !!!!!!!

[lovesickeros]

I also feel old whenever I look at the newer sagau fics

nah cuz what happened..i was there for the birth of this au when it was a handful of people vibing and everyone knew like. everyone now its everywhere and im walking back into it like a year later and everything is on fire LIKE....damn im just old huh. ya'll evolved while i was gone. not that its a bad thing but im like ????? tryna navigate all the new au's and content + writers..

[insanekpopfan]

I don’t rlly get why autistic people are so misunderstood all the time for quite literally no reason..

[cimicherrychanga]

sigh. i miss that stranger i had the most insane game of rock paper scissors online with some 9 years ago

[snowangeled]

i;m literally so fucking done i've been trying to get a job for over a year like i've been looking nearly every day and applying everywhere i fucking can but i still haven't gotten one. i am extremely lucky to still live with my parents and not have to worry about rent or groceries but i have literally zero experience and savings i literally have 25 dollars right now and no one will hire me anf the older i get the less likely i am to find a job and im so stressed please nowhere wants me i fucking hate everything how am i ever going to be able to live on my own if i cant have any money im stressed as fuck please someone hire me

[tamagotchikgs]

sadness n agonies r getting me tonight lads it feels like theres a big knot inside me getting bigger n tighter at the same time n it hurts so much i have no idea what to do but Stand here. i can even sit im too restless im just standing and trying not to cry

[suffercerebral]

me having gone to bed at 6 am every day for the past week and generally spiraling mentally while rotting in bed waking up this morning: a 4 mile hike in the heat is a really good idea right now, and while we're at it let's start like 3 art projects

[bueris]

okay maybe I should seriously reconsider my path in life and sell my soul to marketing or journalism instead