#so even if i get my own place id feel bad taking them from where theyre comfortable

[patron-saint-of-emesis]

its like. do not miss the man at all tbh. thats fine. my cats, however.

[mylittleredgirl]

i know some of you have been pressing your faces to the glass waiting for me to see this one in particular SO i saw "the nurses" the other night and am still thinking about it!!

i love love love it when characters get pushed to a point where you can almost see their childhood selves pop out, like are they even talking about what's happening right now? or are their 12-year-old hearts just screaming?? i love that margaret's outburst is both irrational (the hostile work environment is coming from inside the house; i was yelling at my tv "baby it's your fault!!!") and so so honest.

[this turned into a bit of a character thesis, so not only is there a readmore, there will also be a reblog soon with the rest of the post because i maxed out the image limit] [edit: part ii now in the reblogs!]

this whole time, margaret has treated her subordinates with a heavy hand because she thinks it's the right and fair thing to do. the rules say this is how it works!

she maintains a high standard of excellence in brutal circumstances, but she's also reactive, moody, and unforgiving. she's often shown on the edge of losing control and authority, she inflames situations by overreacting, and the thing she punishes most egregiously is disrespect (toward frank, toward the army, toward herself). she intentionally underlines the distance between herself and the other nurses at every turn.

from season 3 "there's nothing like a nurse": [all IDs in alt]

really, everything she thinks and does comes from a place of "they're not supposed to like me," but the childish part of her that is completely unable to see her own behavior is confused and hurt because "i'm just doing my job so why don’t they like me???"

it's her job to maintain discipline, but especially here in 4077-land, she doesn't have to lead with the whip. henry was beloved because he was an overly permissive clown, which will never be her speed, but colonel potter has all the same training as she does. he's loved and respected as the Good Regular Army Guy because he leads with discernment and mutual respect.

it's easier for him. he's more experienced, he's respected and supported from above and below, and he has a calm temperament — which isn't nothing.

from season 4 "the interview":

whether she's aware of this as a problem or not, we at home can see how margaret's inability to control her emotional reactivity causes her as much grief as her inability to control other people.

if she were capable of laughing off small slights, hawkeye and trapper wouldn't have used her as a chew toy so much, and henry might have taken her real concerns more seriously if they weren't lost in the noise of daily fits, you know? she rarely started it, so i'm not blaming her for the hostile chaos circus of seasons 1-3, but i am saying she would have had a better time if she knew how to take a few deep breaths.

this description from the script, after the near-brawl in the nurses' tent in act one, is basically her character thesis statement:

and here, when she's reacting fully emotionally, the truth comes out! the reason that she won't be flexible and show compassion to the nurses isn't because of the rules, but because they're mean to her!!

that's obviously a very bad place to lead from. she has enormous institutional power over them, including controlling their freedom of movement, but she feels like all the other girls in school are hanging out together and they hate her. because they are! and they do! the fight in act one boils over when they make fun of her hair, and that sent all of them back to middle school.

and in many ways, that's where margaret's emotional maturity is stuck (which is, i think, why i find her so endearing). she can't see herself. she knows they don't like her, trust her, or want her around, but she doesn't understand how she dug this hole herself, or how to get out of it.

to add insult to jealous injury, one of the nurses (mary jo, who gets between margaret and baker to stop the fight and takes care of the others in different ways) is margaret's age, and the others look to her as their chosen leader and personal support.

and i'm sure margaret had NO IDEA this was the messy truth until she heard it come out of her mouth.

and her emotionally breaking on the "one lousy cup of coffee" in particular…

i wonder, how often does some version of that first tent scene happen? does she deliver their assignments every night? she walks in already defensive, they immediately stop laughing, and then... she either finds a reason to scold them or they ice her out until she leaves. (and they probably start laughing again as soon as she does!)

from her perspective, when she arrived for the dreaded sleepover and they turned out the lights the minute she walked in, it's like they cancelled the nightly coffee klatch just to avoid spending one social minute with her.

i also think the nurses are right when they assumed that she wouldn't have accepted an invitation to hang out with them (and might even have snapped at them for being inappropriate for asking). she doesn't cross that emotional line, even when she should — she didn't know gaynor was spiraling after losing so many patients in a row, and didn't respond compassionately when she learned.

has she ever invited them for coffee or a friendly chat? no.

...... but her circumstances have recently changed.

[reblog with the rest of it is here!]

[russellsppttemplates]

My person (Charles Leclerc)

Your brother's best friend is sure you were made for eachother

Note: english is not my first language. Most times I read a brother's best friend trope, it's usually the reader going after the boy, so I felt like doing things a little bit different (also, my brain got a bit jumbled because I was wondering about the perspective, and in the end I went with reader being Joris' twin). Also, I always feel a little bit of impostor's syndrome whenever I post these tropes for which I've read many great pieces about it, and I never know if my ones are good enough to be posted but we're going with it

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

Most people thought having a twin brother was bitter sweet because while you had to share everything since the womb, you had a brother so there came a time where you wanted to have different toys, different rooms and different styles.

Different friends, however, was never a question. Even with different interests, you and Joris often came as a duo, so both of your friend groups were pretty close.

"We're going to Charles' apartment to watch the football game, are you joining us?", Joris asked, throwing himself on your sofa and partially occupying your personal space, "Marta is going to be over and I think she's taking Chiara with her, too".

You don't remember a time where Charles wasn't in your life. Your brother knew him since they were in kindergarten and so there wasn't a memory where he wasn't involved. Which brought you to the last time you were with him, just a week before.

Charles spent the afternoon with Joris at your brother's apartment, wanting to relax and game for the rest of the day.

"It's Y/N", Charles said as he gave Joris his ringing phone, your caller ID prompting him to pick the calk up right away, "can you come and get me, please?", he heard you faintly as Joris got up straight away, listening to whatever you were telling as he put on his trainers and jacket.

"Y/N needs me to pick her up from the café - turns out her date thought she wouldn't mind going home on her own", Joris rolled his eyes, "it will be quick, you're good on your own here?", he checked with Charles, "sure", the driver assured, unpausing the game and carrying on.

Another date and another disappointment for you, Charles thought. While you weren't as close as his brother was to him, he still knew about your life as much as your other friends, and lately you had been looking for someone, your person, you claimed. Luck had yet to join your search as every date you went on seemed to go between bad and awful.

If he had the courage to come clean about his feelings, maybe things would be different. For a while, yes, you were Joris' twin sister and that was it. You were a cool girl and he didn't mind spending time with you or having your hang out with their group, but things changed when you went to university.

Maybe it was your glow up, although you never needed one to catch his eye in the first place, but year after year, you grew to exude confidence, your natural beauty enhanced as you turned into a charming, caring and kind young woman.

Since he didn't want to ruin the bond you had, he watched it all happen from the sidelines. How happy you sounded whenever you had a date later in the week, whenever a cute guy came up to you in the club and how you squealed "I think this one might be the one!" as you excused yourself and declined dinner invitations from the group for a date.

He heard the door open and then close, footsteps approaching the living room as he paused the game just in time for you to sit on the sofa, "what's up, Leclerc?", you nudged his shoulder.

"I'm good, how are you?", he quesioned, "I guess that one isn't the love of your life either?", he semi joked.

"He was certifiable, at the very least", you began as the boys chuckled, "Hey! I'm qualified to make such appreciation! He kept talking about himself and he was borderline sexist, but then he said I would be fine going home on my own? I don't know, it was a mess and I can't believe I even experienced that - I'm going to pretend it was a fever dream", you shrugged your shoulders, "I was expecting to spend the afternoon with him - thank Goodness I didn't, - and the construction work at my place is still going so I don't have anywhere to go, I'm sorry if I'm crashing your afternoon", you gulped.

"It's fine, it's nice having company other than us two playing and screaming at eachother", Charles smiled as Joris shrugged his shoulders, "you're already staying her until the building work is done", you brother offered.

"I wasn't asking you, silly; you're my twin, dealing with me it's something that comes with the job", you winked.

When it came to dinner time, the three of you decided to have take out, your brother calling the restaurant and scheduling a time for him to pick it up, "I'm going to shower", you said as you got up from the sofa, heading to the guest room you were staying in.

By the time you got out, your heard Joris shout that he was leaving while you put on some comfy clothes for the evening in. When you went to the balcony so your towels could air dry for a bit, you sat in the padded chair, looking out to the sunset.

He would come, you thought. It wasn't particularly a manifestation or a "throw it at the universe" kind of thing, but rather something to reassure yourself. You were worthy of the standards you set for yourself and there was someone out there for you, and he would come.

"Hey", Charles stepped into the balcony, coming to sit in the chair next to yours, "a cent for your thoughts?", he smiled softly, the warm yellow and orange light hitting his eyes in a glowy hue.

"Do you believe that the right person for you is out there?", you shot softly.

"I know she is", Charles gulped, "Oh, confident!", you giggled softly, "but it's nice, better than being sulky like me".

"I'm not sure how much better it is. I know she is out there, but it's a little more complicated than just going up to her and tell her that", he played with hia thumbs.

"So you're chickening out?", you quirked your eyebrow, partly teasing him but genuinely curious about it. You didn't have enough fingers to count how many girls tried to approach you and befriend you with the only goal of getting into a friendship circle that would lead them to Charles, and he could probably chat up anyone he wanted, so it was hard for you to understand how he didn't have the love of his life with him yet.

"It's not chickening out if you think it might cause some issues with your friends, I think. I'm being prudent, that's all", Charles tried, wanting to take the opportunity to try and see where you stood. Girls were usually sharper than guys, so you said many times, maybe you'd take the hint.

"If I knew who the love of my life was, I would go to him and never look back. I know it sounds silly, but I wouldn't want to be away from him a second longer, it would be quite shitty if he was in a relationship", you mused, "but if we were really meant to be together - if it was a both ways kind of thing - he would know it, right? Goodness, sound a bit like a romantic sop, don't I?", you chuckled, "but I would fight for him, for us".

Charles felt inspired before he felt a little angry. Here you here saying you would fight until you found your person when he was right there. If it really worked as a both ways thing, you'd have to know and feel the person you kept looking for was him. He broke into a full belly laugh as he stated at you. No make-up, hair sitting in its natural wave and comfy clothes, you never looked so beautiful to him.

"Would you let me fight for us, too?", he mused quietly but loud enough for you to hear, "would you want me to do that?".

Giggling at him, you could only shake your head at his words, "I know this sound silly - Joris teases me enough about it enough", you groaned as your hands covered your face.

"I'm not joking or teasing", Charles clarified, turning to face you on the chair, "All I want is for you to look at me the way you look at them", Charles stated, "whenever you talk about your dates before you go on them, you're so hopeful that that guy will be the one, you look forward to it like it will be that time, and you never looked at me that way when I constantly make efforts to hung the stars and the moon for you and stand there hoping they get to you".

His confession took you off guard. Charles just admitted he liked you, in a way with words that was more elaborate than what any of your dates had ever told you combined.

"I thought you were being nice?! Was this some sort of plan?!", you quesioned immediately. He had been around you your whole life, you surely would've noticed it, wouldn't you?

Charles chuckled in a way you found a smidge belittling, "it wasn't a plan! Y/N, I have not been planning this or doing some strategy, it just happened out of nowhere!", Charles bit back, "like you said, the person for me is out there and she's you!".

The noise from the door pulled both of you out your discussion, your brother's singalong voice announcing he was back with the food.

Dusting your sweatpants, you stepped back inside the living room, shaking off the jitters you had as your brother scrunched up his face, "is everything okay?", he asked.

"Of course, I'm just hungry and you drove like a grandpa here", you bickered back as Charles joined you at the table, "I'll get the cutlery and plates from the kitchen", you mumbled.

The dinner was eaten quietly on your side, Charles and Joris making most of the conversation as you exchanged a few looks with the Formula One driver, your twin brother seemingly obvious as he carried on as usual, "I'm going to bed", you said after helping tidy, "are you sure? We were going to watch something on TV?", Joris asked you.

"I'm getting a headache, so I'll pass, good night boys", you gave them tight lipped smile.

In the bedroom, you changed into your pyjamas and finished your night-time routine and got under the sheets, Charles' words replaying as you looked at the ceiling.

"Y/N? Are you joining us or not? Do you have any plans?", Joris insisted, "you've been weird lately", he pointed out.

"I'll join you, yes, just need to get my hoodie and then I'll be good to go", you scrambled out as your heart beat faster inside your chest.

Joris offered to drive to Charles' apartment, getting there when Riccardo, Marta and little Chiara were alresdy inside with Charles.

"The rest of the group couldn't come, so it's just us", Riccardo said as he noticed your expression, "what a shame, more food for us!", you smirked, sitting next to Marta and playing with the little girl on her lap, "hello, my love, hello!", you cooed in the voice you only had for babies, "look at you so grown up! You get more beautiful everytime I see you", you smiled, tickling her chin softly as she giggled loudly.

"Who did the roast potatoes last time we got together?", Joris stepped back into the living room, "I did", you stated as you grabbed one of the toys on the coffee table, ready to sit down on the floor so you and Chiara could play together.

"Don't sit down!", your brother yelled, "sorry, but you can't sit down - Charles needs help with the potatoes and he doesn't know the recipe like you do", he reasoned as you got up, trying not to show how much you didn't want to be in the same room alone with Charles. Watching football while having dinner with your group of friends was one thing, spending one on one time with Charles after what he said to you the last time was another.

"Hey", you said as you stepped into the kitchen, "Joris said you needed help, what can I do?".

Charles smiled a little, maybe at the irony of your quesion, "I don't know what seasonings to use in these", he said as he showed you the vegetable with the ones he already cut up.

"Okay, do you keep the spices in the same place?", you asked as he nodded, encouraging you to use his kitchen like it was your own.

Opening the cabinets and grabbing what you needed, you started mixing the ingredients and cutting up the ones you needed to, "can you get me the olive oil, please? I can't reach it", you asked and Charles complied, "thank you".

"Is this how this is going to be? Interacting like we haven't known eachother since we were little and like I haven't poured my heart out to you?", Charles said, arms crossed as he rested against the kitchen counter.

"I wasn't counting on you saying all of that, I was so caught off guard that I haven't been able to think about anything else in my off time!", you offered, setting the knife down on the chopping board.

"It's not like people have speeches ready and give of warnings when they're about to confess their feelings for someone... I myself wasn't expecting to do it until the words came out of my mouth", Charles gestured as if he was vomiting, "what do you expect it to be like anyway? People have to warn you they have feelings for you and ask if you want to hear it?! Is that what you want?".

"I want to feel loved, appreciated and valued. I want to be with someone that reminds me that I'm beautiful, that I'm smart and I'm wonderful. I want to share my life with someone who has no trouble with me wanting to have both career goals and family goals, I want someone who supports me as much as a support him, who is willing to do silly things because I enjoy them and who loves me for me, flaws and all", you let out in one go, "That's what I want".

Charles eyebrows climbed on his forehead, "Are you insinuating I can't give you that? Is that why we haven't spoken since that evening at Joris' place?".

"I'm saying you're my brother's best friend, and no matter how much I think you can do it - because you make me feel like that just from being my friend, imagine if we were dating -, I don't want to risk whatever we have, all of us", you gestured to the living room where the rest of the group was.

"Y/N", Charles pleaded, "you don't think I've thought about that? I didn't do it on a whim like you think I did, I've been sitting on this for quite a while, actually", he clarified, "I will respect whatever you decide, okay? But can't just sit and pretend that you don't want this thing between you and me as much as I do, because we could be so good-", he was interrupted as Marta crossed the corner and stepped inside the kitchen, "Charles, can I heat Chiara's soup on the microwave?", she asked with the small tupperware on her hands.

"Sure, here", he guided her as you resumed to seasoning the potatoes, putting them on the tray and then in the oven, "the game is about to start, hurry up!", Joris yelled.

"I'll just wash this, and that too", you took the tupperware's lid as well as the utensils you needed for the dressing.

"I need to cool it down a little, maybe in a bigger bowl", Marta said as Charles helped in getting the bowl from the cupboard as you set the utensils aside to dry, "Merci, Charles, off we go then", she said as she waited for you both to leave and go to the living room so she could follow you.

"Come here, sweet cheeks", you clapped at Chiara, taking her away from your brother's arms and putting her in the highchair so she could eat comfortably, "auntie Y/N is going to give you your delicious soup, yummy yummy", you smiled.

Charles couldn't help but take in the sight, how you made Chiara feel like she was the only person in the world as you smiled and spoke to her, finding a million and one ways to get her to eat the soup in the bowl.

The food was ready by the half-time break, so you all helped with bringing the food to the table, eating it as the team you were supporting ended up winning the game.

"She's knocked out", you pointed out to Riccardo, Chiara asleep in the little makeshift cot you made on the sofa with some pillows and blankets to make sure she was warm and secure.

"We can clean up, you guys go home and take this little princess to sleep in her own bed", Charles smiled, stroking the little girl's cheek softly as he watched her peaceful expression.

"You don't mind?", Marta wondered as the three of you nodded, helping the parents gather their daughter's belongings so they could leave, hoping she wouldn't wake up and make it harder for her to fall back asleep.

"Sweet dreams, petite fleur", you cooed as Marta cuddled Chiara into her chest, squeezing her small hand softly before they walked out of the door.

"These need to go on the dishwasher", you sorted through the plates and checked if they were safe to go on the machine as your brother help you.

"We should probably get going", Joris said, not wanting to overstay your welcome, "do you need anything else, Charles? Otherwise, me and Y/N will leave you to it", he said.

"Actually, me and Charles need to talk, if that's okay", you looked at the driver, catching him by surprise before he nodded in agreement.

Joris didn't dwell too much on it like you thought he would, "so you need me to come and pick you up or...?", he trailed before Charles saved you, "don't worry, I've got her", he stated.

When Charles accompanied your twin brother to the door, he was blunt and honest, "She's my sister, but there could be worse guys than you", Joris offered as Charles narrowed his eyes, "Oh, please, do you think I'm that blind? I've seen the way you look at her and how you always go above and beyond for her - she's just being too stubborn about it to see it, too. Still, if you ever break her heart or cause her any tears of sadness and anger, you're going to wish I didn't know so much about you", he threatened, although it didn't go as planned as they both laughed, "I trust you, there wasn't anyone I would trust like this", he sighed, "you're just lucky you have brothers, otherwise I might've taken revenge on you", he nudged his shoulder.

"I bet Lorenzo would enjoy a cuddle every now and again if you'd like", Charles giggled before he showed his seriousness again, "I just want this to work out between us, I think she's my person, you know?", he mused, realising how cliché and whipped he sounded, "I'll take care of her, you don't need to worry", he assured.

Charles closed the door and walked back to the living room where you sat down on the sofa, legs covered with one of the blankets, "I- thank you for staying back", he smiled, pointing with his eyes to the spot next to you silently asking if he could sit.

You opened the blanket so he could sit next to you and you could both keep warm, "I want to apoligise for not saying anything the last time we spoke, and for how I've handled this", you began, "I'm sorry, Charles", you said earnestly.

"Apology accepted", he nodded, "and did you just stay here to apoligise?", he quesioned.

"I- I thought we could have a date, sort of anyway", you mumbled, "and I could also tell you how I feel about you since it seems I owe you that with what you've told me", you looked into his eyes, "it wasn't that you were ever off bounds or anything like that, I never cared for those supposed rules, but it never occurred to me", you blurted and Charles quirked a brow, "shoot, that's not what I meant, ugh", you grunted as he soothingly rubbed your thigh, "what I meant is I always thought you'd never look at me that way - I'm Joris' twin - so I just took all of the affection I had for you and put it in a friendship feelings and all of the things you did for me, I thought you were just being nice because you're a nice guy", you clarified.

"Does this mean you're letting me treat you like you deserve? Because I plan on making sure you feel and know you're wonderful every single day", he smiled charmingly, confident words contrasting with his shy attempt of lacing your fingers together on his lap.

"How can you be so sure we are eachother's person?", you couldn't help but mumble, even if the butterflies in your stomach were dancing like they hadn't been in a long time, "I just know, and I'll help you see it, too", he smiled, kissing your knuckles before he pulled you to his chest, finding something to watch on the TV.

You both watched reruns of one of your favourite shows, pointing out little details you loved and talking about any topic that came to mind, and once Charles' body warmth and his touches along your arm caught up to your system and lulled you to sleep, your head finding it's spot on his chest as he smiled down at you, your beauty never ceasing to amaze him as he noticed every mole, freckle and scar on your face from up close.

Even if he didn't want to move, and that it wouldn't be the first time he slept on his sofa, he reasoned that he should at least offer you his bed. Softly stroking your cheek, he coaxed you to wake up, "I'm sorry for waking you up, but we can't sleep here", he whispered, kissing the side of your head, "you can sleep in my bed, I'll take the sofa", he offered as you stretched a little bit, removing yourself from his chest.

"If you promise you won't do any funny business, we can sleep in the same bed", you yawned.

"Of course I won't, Y/N! I would never do anything you didn't want to, I-", Charles panicked, not wanting you to think he was trying to take advantage of you.

"I'm only kidding, I know you won't", you assured, arms pulling him to stand up with you as you walked to the bedroom after turning everything off, "I trust you, Charles, completely", you smiled.

To him, it meant the world.

You felt his heart race when your hand landed on his chest, "I need a t-shirt, though, this is not comfy to sleep in", you reasoned as he looked for one on his drawers, "here, you can get ready here while I get ready in the bathroom", he smiled, kissing the top of your head before he stepped inside the ensuite.

After you swapped so you could brush your teeth, you were both undoing the bed, pulling the sheets back over you and having eachother.

"I really want to kiss you right now, but I don't want to cross any boundaries", Charles admitted as your heart raced in your chest, "I'd really like that, you can kiss me if you want", you consented.

Charles leaned to rub your nose in his before kissing your lips softly, allowing you both to revel in the feelings that had been put in labelled boxes at the back of your minds.

Parting your lips to breathe, you cupped Charles' cheek, your palm tickling from his facial hair as your thumb rubbed his skin, "I think you might be right", you mumbled, licking your lips, "about what?", he mused, "about the fact that you'll help me see it too", you smiled.

The next morning, you woke up with Charles looking at you, "Good morning, Y/N", he greeted, "See? I didn't pull any funny business", he wiggled his brows chuckling.

This was a sight you could get used to.

"Good morning", you smiled, "did you sleep well?", you wondered, pulling closer to him now that you were awake.

"I did, did you?", he asked and you nodded, cuddling closer to him and basking in the feeling of just being there.

"We are going to take this as slow as you want", Charles whispered against your forehead, leaving little kisses and pecks on your skin, "but I want you to know I'm all in".

"I'm all in, too", you whispered, "I can't promise you it will be a straight line - or that I won't spiral out every now and again because hey, it's me -, but I feel really good about this, you make me feel really good", you blushed as you kissed between his eyebrows, "having said this, not all of us have the day to do some training and sim racing, and I'm one of them. I have to go home to change and then head to the clinic", you pouted slightly.

"How about I make us some breakfast first, then I'll drop you off?", he suggested, stealing a peck from your lips, "hmm, sounds good", you hummed.

.

"Were you expecting us to be surprised?", Marta said as she and her family arrived in Charles' yacht, the three of them seeing you and Charles kissing at the table.

Throwing your head back in laughter as Charles walked up to help them inside, you shielded your eyes from the sun with your hand, "at least pretend you are", you joked.

"Oh my Goodness, I never thought you two would become a thing? Does this mean we can finally stop hearing your disgraced love life stories and Charles' complaints about who you went on a date with?", Riccardo belted out, catching the attention from a couple on the yacht next to the one you were sitting on.

"To be fair, that's how I noticed it", Marta began, "Charles didn't complain anymore about how he was alone and that the universe wasn't working on his favour", she smirked, greeting you two.

"We have been keeping it down low just to see how things would go", you blushed at getting caught and steering the conversation elsewhere once Chiara babbled at you, "Oh, baby girl, hello!", you cooed, pulling her into your arms.

"Soon enough you can get one of those, I bet your kid would be very very cute", Riccardo nudged Charles' shoulder, loving that the group now could have a few teasing moments and themes at your expense, all in good fun.

"What a warm welcome!", you heard your brother yell, a fake angry and ironic tone noticeable in his voice, "First, no one is here to greet me with a glass of something to drink or even a helping hand to step in", Joris clarified, "then I'm presented with a conversation about my sister's and my best friends sex life, which I don't want to know about by the way!!", he said as he came up to you, kissing the side of your head, "I'm happy she's happy, and that you're all happy together, but no talking about that, please!".

[huellitaa]

⋅˚₊‧ ୨ feeling uncomfy in ur own skin

ok so this is something ive been struggling with for years. like i wake up some days and just feel Eugh way more than id like to. SO i decided i'd make a little guide on this! for me and for you 🩷✨

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 reasons why we could be feeling uncomfortable with ourselves and who we are

♡ having a shitty mental diet and consuming media and things that make you feel bad abt urself

♡ being in an environment where we're constantly being judged or put down, even over the most basic things

♡ hanging around negative people or negative places

♡ not giving urself enough credit for ur own achievements and accomplishments

♡ changing urself constantly for others and not having a clear sense of self to hold on to

♡ not having boundaries on how you and others treat you

♡ staying stagnant in the same place in your life and not changing (🎀🗒️also read: get comfy being uncomfy ♡)

♡ not paying enough attention to yourself and avoiding your genuine thoughts, feelings and emotions

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 1. be gentle with yourself!

pleasepleaseplease its ok to have bad days its ok to not feel great every day. treat yourself as you would someone you love. if you just aren't feeling good today, then you aren't feeling good! honour that and respect that and deal with that accordingly. even if you are uncomfortable with yourself right now or you don't like yourself right now, please try and treat yourself with care regardless, because no matter what stage you are in in your life right now you are and always will be the most important person in ur life, so TREAT URSELF LIKE IT🫶💖

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 2. inspiration, not comparison!

i know its often told not to go looking at people who are ahead of you in these times but hear me out. i think looking at and observing people you admire who are further ahead of you is very motivating to build yourself up and *become more like them* in your own way. you look up to them because of ___? what can you do to become your own version of that? thinking like this gets me more inspired to just get out of bed because i want to be more like them.

two words for this one - NO. COMPARISON. gaining inspiration from others to better yourself and comparing yourself to others are two completely different things. 🫶 (shameless self promo, but i have a post on this here! 🩷✨)

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 3. analysis: detective work chapter!

journal and think and think to urself why u might feel like this or what caused this. when did it start? has anything happened lately that may have caused this? how does it feel, in depth? what can you do to combat this? how can you make it through the day & make it so you do even better tomorrow?

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 4. channeling the mindset!

back to my point on our idols, thinking like them & thinking what they'd do in this situation helps me a lot. personally one of my idols is ada lovelace so whenever im really tired and unmotivated or insecure on my abilities or appearance or anything else i think to myself "what would she do?" and 9 times out of 10 im up at my desk in my cutest outfit hard at work. this is def one of my favourite points and something i use on the daily for like literally everything and 100% recommend 🩷✨

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 5. what would i do?

similarly, ask urself what the best version of yourself or the version of urself youre working towards would do in this situation. be your own inspiration. be ur own muse. would they stay in bed and rot all day? if the answer is no then ur up. out. immediately. ask urself what they would do. if ur feeling drained, would they take a day off to do some self care and recharge? if ur feeling sad, would they be gentle with themselves and let themselves feel sad for a little while & try to work to the root of the problem?

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 6. understanding yourself!

make a list of the things that make you the happiest and most comfortable & productive and the things that make you the unhappiest and the opposite of those things. i mentioned this in my recharge day post, but figuring out these will help you find out which negative behaviours or habits are lowering ur vibrations and making u feel like this, and help u to engage more in the things that make you happy with yourself and everything around you 💗✨

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 7. pay attention!

pay close attention to ur internal landscape and your self talk throughout the day. note down every little thing you notice, even if you think it won't be helpful; for example, do you find yourself indulging in negative talk abt urself, negative talk abt others, constantly being pessimistic and expecting the worst, indulging in judgement and criticism of urself and everyone around you, getting distracted easily, and so on.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 8. what would i do, part 2

like i mentioned earlier, you should be your own inspiration. you should be your own muse. as much as it's nice to have idols, when ur trying to change something about urself and adjust and improve ur own behaviours, you should be mainly focusing on what you want to achieve by changing said behaviours. do you know who you're working towards being? do you know how you want to feel? do you know what you are changing these things you feel into? think about whether or not the person you are now lines up with the person you want to be in all aspects of ur life. if you feel like you aren't even trying to meet these standards then of course ur gonna feel bad about urself. of course don't be too hard on urself, but keep this in mind. 💓✨

finally, remember that these things are temporary and it wont be like this forever. ur beautiful and perfect no matter what and in these times u gotta show up for yourself even more and never give up! i believe in u 🫶🩷

all my love 💗💬✨🎀

[minotaurs-my-beloved]

((i love reading your writing! Id love to see one about two vampires who just happen to be friends, taking their time teasing you until you beg them to take you. If you’re taking requests! :3))

I don't usually care much for vampires, but dear lorddd I am on my knees for this prompt. I fucking love being shared

They had been wanting to have their way with you for ages.

Every time the three of you hung out it took everything in their body to not fuck you right then and there. They talk about you when you aren't around for hours, your pretty body, how cute you look when you look up at them, that sweet smile.

Everything about you makes them want more.

It had been ages since you've been fucked and it was obvious you were begging for the both of them, but you would never admit it. Not that you needed to, they could see the wanting in your eyes, grinning when you clench your thighs together and refuse to meet their gaze.

Instead of waiting for you to act, they take it into their own hands. Starting soft with him just placing a hand high on your leg, slowly moving more to your inner thigh, so close to brushing his fingers against your crotch. Other times, she grabs your hips from behind, casually moving you where she wants you, knowing how it makes you feel when she reminds you how much stronger she is compared to you.

Over time their moves become far less subtle and soon you can't help but get wet every time you see them. Eventually, it gets too much and you beg them to take you, you need them so fucking bad and they've been so damn mean to you with all their teasing!

They laugh at you for being so needy, such a pathetic little human, but you don't care. How could you when they're both fingering you at the same time? Watching two fingers from each vampire pumping slowly into you, drenched in your cum while you sit on both of their laps. Whining and bucking against them, getting all teary-eyed when they refuse to fuck you, wanting you more desperate before they give you that.

Finally, after they make you cum on their tongues and fingers too many times for you to count they agree that you're ready. He burrows his cock deep inside your tight cunt, her strap in your ass, both watching in awe at how gorgeous you look bouncing on them, nearly drooling from the pleasure. You whine, not even being able to get yourself to cum before your legs collapse from under you. No longer being able to hold your weight, too shaky and tired from everything else.

They coo at how cute you are, such a weak little human, can't even make herself cum! Don't worry, they'll do it for you, holding you steady as they fuck up into you, digging into your g-spot each time he's fully in you. At some point, you can't take it anymore, passing out while they continue to use your body for their pleasure.

Waking up extremely sore, definitely unable to walk, but it doesn't matter, they'd very willingly carry you around<33

[the-s1lly-corner]

Taking their clothing because you miss them (Creepypasta)

two things: i promise im still working on the eyeless jack x reader fic to celebrate 1k TToTT my steam for writing the fic is just dwindling a little since its very different from my usual posts </3 but i still intend on getting it done! in fact id say its about halfway done, if you dont include proofreading and fixing stuff!! so theres definitely.. something.. i just dont have a time window for it </3 originally i was going to write this with ben/jeff/toby and make it platonic but, i realize this prompt is usually used for romance stuff so theyre gonna sit this post out, ill probably think of another group post soon to make up for it but shrugs getting into the writing i realize i wrote this prompt for some characters a while ago so im going to link those parts in their place

SLENDERMAN:

you take his tie! normally i would say his jacket, but i feel like thats such an obvious choice.. imagine you dont know how to tie it so he walks in on your fumbling with it. trying in vain to get it down... he probably thinks its a little amusing... i mean who wouldnt? kind of just watches you fiddle with it for a minute before making his presence known, likely making you jump. he would much rather you ask than take his clothing, he doesnt have much of it (though is there much need for it, anyway?) (non sexual obviously). probably teaches you how to properly do the tie. his hands absolutely consume yours

SPLENDORMAN:

just ask him and hes going to give you just about any piece of clothing he has on him! i like to think that he lets you have his hat a lot of the times. especially after he walked in on you trying it on.. sure it might be a little too big for you, what with splendor being very tall and thus having a larger head than yours... probably goes on and on about how adorable you look. i mean hes always telling you how cute or pretty you are but it hits different for him when youre wearing something of his. you dont have to ask for his clothing, hes very open to sharing! definitely gets an alternate outfit so he can match with you every now and then

MASKY:

naturally, you steal his jacket! i mean it looks so comfortable, does it not? this isnt an easy feat, by the way. since hes wearing it most of the time, so youre probably going to have to snag it when hes showering or something. quietly stares at you... he DOES think its cute but i do think he would try to get his clothing bad. another jacket similar in style to his mysteriously makes its way into your closet and its also in your size. dont ask where it came from.. he totally didnt steal it..! likely wouldnt want you to take whats his without asking or at least letting him know.. hence him getting your own jacket. wont physically rip it off of you, though, hes not that cold

PUPPETEER:

i think he loves seeing you in his clothing. he thinks you look cute.. but also... pathetic? usually lets you wear his coat or hat if you ask nicely. he already knows youre going to snatch something before you even do it but stays quiet because he thinks its pathetic/adorable, you think youre being so sly but youve already been caught. will tease you for it. a lot. its kind of his own way of getting you to do it again. genuinely thinks its one of the best things in the world. dont admit you do it because you sometimes miss him or like how he smells, its going to do ungodly things to his ego

EJ, LJ, AND HOODIE:

[rierice8]

Idk if u still write but id love for the reader to bite and drink vanitas blood while hes pinned down, panting, whimpering, gripping the sheets, getting hard asf… basically what jeanne did.

OMG DOWN BAD FOR VANITAS- and yes I do still write! Sorry I’ve been in Ireland with my marching band! That’s why I answered so late! We won some parades and it was so much fun, shout out to my roommates. I’m now back home though so I’m back to writing my requests!

But anyways ahem ahem, yes, ahem. I love this request-

Word count: 1234 words

(Not me being a little bit of a simp)

Vanitas x male vampire reader

!!Suggestive content but no smut!!

Synopsis: you were feeling jealous from earlier and craving some blood and Vanitas was taking too long to show up…

Thirsty vampire

You were tired. Rather drained, in fact. Vanitas and Noé had dragged you to another raggedy part of Paris to heal another curse bearer. It was a wild chase, they were quiet and stealthy, especially for a curse bearer. After hours of running back and forth, Vanitas finally managed to capture and cure them. Of course, the woman was rather touchy with your boyfriend after he helped her find her true name. You hated it. Noé had questioned if you were alright because you looked and felt very tense, which you were. Though at the time you had just said you were tired. You swore she’d tried to kiss Vanitas and yes, it made you jealous. It’s even an underestimation to say you were jealous, you were fuming. So clearly now that you’re home and Vanitas is off frolicking with Noé instead of being with you, you’re done. By that you ment pissed beyond belief.

You sat on your bed, waiting for him to show up. Just sitting, and waiting, and sitting, and waiting. You bit your lip hard enough to draw blood, tasting the metal of your own blood made you crave a drink.

Almost an hour and a half later, you still sat on the bed, unmoving. You’d sat through sun set and now it was dark outside, yet still, Vanitas was no where to be found. Every minute thst passed you grew more and more upset with him. First he let that curse bearer touch and flirt with him, and then he doesn’t even come back. When the door finally opened at midnight, your eyes were red.

“Oh, wow, it’s already rather late! I hope I didn’t keep you waiting on me and Noé too long,” Vanitas said with his usual catty, carefree voice.

“No, no, not long at all. It’s not as though I waited five hours in this room wondering why you didn’t tell me where you’d gone,” you spat, not even trying to hide the sarcasm in your words.

“And so? Its not like I have to tell you everything I’m doing, when and why. You’re just a jealous boyfriend,” Vanitas laughed annoyingly just to rub in the statement.

“Really? Fine then, I am a jealous boyfriend. I saw that curse bearer drooling over you after you cured her, and you just let her touch you and even try to kiss you. And you didn’t even come back and tell me that you were going off with Noé, nor did you invite me to come,” you began to rant.

“You looked tired,” he shrugged. At that comment you lost it. You grabbed him by the arm and dragged him closer to the bed. You pulled his coat off and undid his collar.

“Slow down, wait! What are you doing?” Vanitas gasped as you trailed your hot tounge over his neck and collarbone. He didn’t do anything to fight you though, so you continued. Finding the perfect place, you bit down. Your fangs penitrating the soft surface of his skin.

“Ah!” He moaned at the feeling. You sucked fervently at his neck, like a man dying of thirst. You pushed him down on the bed one hand gently resting on the back of his neck and the other holding you up. Your knee pushing at his clothed dick.

The motion in itself made Vanitas’ whole body jolt and him to let out a large moan.

“Oh mon dieu- mmmmh!” Vanitas was gasping for air at this point. His long nails were digging into your arms, though not enough that it hurt. You were too overwhelmed with the taste of his amazing blood to care either way. You kept sucking harder and even started to move your knee around.

“Ah! Mmm-mph! Stop— ah! Stop it!” Vanitas moaned into your neck but you couldn’t hear him, you were too focused on drinking from him. You could never get full of his blood, it was yours and only yours. You let your fangs slip out of him and licked up whatever excess blood came from the wound. Vanitas was sweating and panting on the bed sheets. You could feel how hard he was from this alone. He looked at you with his half lidded vibrent blue eyes as though he wanted you to continue. He was undressing you with his eyes.

“If you think that you can pull a stunt like this and then get the relif you crave then you are sorely mistaken. I drank from you for my pleasure and my pleasure only,” you said as you turned around to leave.

“Wait! So you’re just gonna leave then?! Thats not fair,” he said out of breath and in a more whiney tome than normal.

“Yes, I am going to leave. And don’t touch yourself while I’m gone or I’ll ignore you for a month,” you said coldly and walked out of the room. He ran after you and grabbed your arm. You stared back at him emotionlessly. His eyes were so hard to refuse. Vanitas kept eye contact with you before biting off one of his gloves and scratching his neck hard enough it bleed.

“You should probably clean that up, before I have to waste it,” he smirked. Who were you to reject that, it was such a hot display of disregard for his own personal safety. Not even just that, he was too desperate and it was making you feel desperate too. You lent in again and bit him in a new spot now, sucking again as hard as you wanted.

“Mmmmmf— mmf!” he tried to silence his moans with his hand. You let go of his neck and looked at him. You tore his hand from his mouth and instead intertwined your fingers.

“I want to hear everything I make you feel,” you said before gently and slowly unbuttoning his shirt, after it was on the floor, you violently and suddenly bit the other side of his collar. Vanitas’ hair was a mess, just like him. He was panting and moaning so loudly you were sure Noé could hear from the neighbouring room. Vanitas tries to do something, anything, but he fails to even move his hand an inch.

“Nghh- ah!” All that could be heard in the room was a light gulping and Vanitas’ occasional whimpers. When you’d finally decided you’d had your fill, you let go with a sigh. Vanitas was under you panting wildly. His pants had a wet spot, so clearly, he came in his pants.

“Oh? And all I did was bite you,” you laughed. He immediately knew what you were referring to and looked away, still panting.

“Oh shut up, you know you weren’t just biting me,” he said arrogantly, already back to his usual self.

All you did was laugh at his cute disselved state. Blue hair spread all across the bed, three different bite marks adorned his neck and collarbone, his shirt somewhere long forgotten. You trailed your cold hands up his abdomen and watched him shiver with anticipation.

“I can’t stay mad at you, Vanitas,” you whispered.

“Huh, why not? Too pretty, am I?” He said cockily. You laughed,

“Maybe.”

You continued to trail your hands up and down his milky skin.

“What are you doing, mon chérie,” Vanitas asked. You smiled,

“Nothing, just admiring your build,” You whispered. The night ended in a comfortable silence after that.

[seungfl0wer]

*Purple*

Seungmin x Reader (Fem)

Although this is shorter than what I normally write, I feel like this needs warnings. Also a note this scenario has been on my mind for awhile and I just needed to write it lol.

Warnings: Seungmin says some harsh things, the sex not feeling good anymore. You have to use the safe word. This has slight smut, angst and a happy ending (of course)

-🩵

Seungmin has had a bad day up and down. He hoped the party after work with his amazing girlfriend would help him relax but- of course it did not. Seeing all the men wanting to talk to you made his blood boil. He knew you would never do anything on purpose you were just so kind and outgoing. However the feeling of today made it seem more- flirtatious?

When you both got into the car seungmin gripped the steering wheel tightly. Not saying one word. You felt your heart racing not knowing why he was upset. Trying to ask him was only met with a ‘I’m fine’. Which was obvious bullshit. Walking up to the apartment as you opened the door you were met with Seungmin grabbing your arm pulling you to your room.

“You think you can just act like a slut and expect things to be fine?” He spat. He practically ripped your clothes off before taking his own off. “Seung I didn’t-“ you started to say before a strong smack to your pussy was connected. “Shut up.” He hissed. All the rage from today came flowing out and before you knew it he had you face down ass up. Face buried into the pillow your noises muffled.

“You’re such a dumb whore you know that?” He says as he’s pounding into you. “I bet if I wasn’t there you’d be sucking face with those guys” he said his words actually digging into you. The feeling of everything was honestly off a bit. It wasn’t that it didn’t feel good but it also kinda didn’t? Seungmin slapped your ass hard “Little slut probably thinking of them railing you right now huh?”

Another smack this time it was harder, it hurt and not in a good way. You felt tears forming in the corners of your eyes, however when you tried to move seungmin just pushed your face down into the bed more. You couldn’t move and then the panic started to set in. ‘Did he really think those things?’ Your chest was starting to tighten as he fucked you. There wasn’t any pleasure anymore and you started to sob.

“Crying because you’re getting punished? Such a fucking baby” he spat taking his hand to smack your ass again. The bright red marks turning a soft purple. Seungmin moved the hand that was on the back of your head to your hips as he fucked you deeper. Finally. You pulled your head up and could only muster up a small “purple.” Your body shutting down as seungmins movements began to slow. “Pur-ple” you stuttered out again. This time seungmins body froze. “Purple?” He repeated eyes going big.

This was the safe word you guys had in place at all times, even when you weren’t being rough it was there just incase. Seungmin quickly wrapped his arms around you pulling you to him. “What do need pup?” He said trying to make his voice as sweet as possible but you could hear how frantic he sounded. When you didn’t reply he titled your head up to him to look at you.

The damn holding back all your tears finally breaking as the flood poured from your eyes. Your body trembled under him as you curled up into a ball in his arms. Head finding cover in his chest where you muffled cries dared to come out. Seungmin felt his heart breaking at the state of you. “Y/n- hey m’sorry- don’t cry” he rubbed your back trying to help you calm down. As the flood started to die down you sniffled a small “do- you hate me”

Seungmin nearly lost it, biting back tears this whole time trying to be there for you. “Love, id never hate you.” He said rubbing the back of your head. “But..” you started to say feeling more tears about to fall “you think I’d really cheat on you?” You said choking those tears back.

“No! Y/n no. I know you’d never do it.. my brain was just putting bad thoughts in my mind. I didn’t mean it in any other way than dirty talk” he said pulling you into him even closer than before. “Y/n I love you with all my heart, I’m so fucking sorry I made you feel that way.” He said kissing your head softly. You nod looking up at the him, he took the opportunity to wipe the tears from your face.

“Want me to run a warm bath? We can soak together would you want that?” He coo’d. You smiled a bit nodding yes. This was always one of your favorite things just in the warm water as seungmin held on to you from behind. “Alright love let me go start the water and we can get in. Do you need anything a drink? Snack?” He asked still worried about you. You shook your head no looking at him again “just need you” you said softly wrapping your arms around him.

💙 If you’d like to read more of my stuff you can find it Here: Master List . Thank you for reading and if requests are open or you just wanna talk feel free to send me something🩵

[tokyogruel]

Tell me more about the idea that muu is lying and not actually rich please. Ive only ever seen one other person consider that before but they never elaborated + changed their mind post INMF so im really curious. Like what do you think supports it?

im so sorry this took me a few days, work tends to drain me a lot more than id like haha

but i would be more than happy to elaborate!

unfortunately a few of my claims are based off of evidence/supportive pieces that are in a discord server i no longer have access to, so please forgive me

to start off, it was pointed out to me at one point that muu goes to a more expensive private school, though there are grants and scholarships that allow those without the proper funding to attend these schools regardless of their financial status (i.e. haruhi in ouran high school host club). i believe muu is a very intelligent young girl who is capable of earning one of these scholarships easily

muu also has a recurring theme of "foreigner in a place that is new and scary to her" her being a blonde-haired light-eyed half-french, lesbian GNC-girl in a private school filled with dark-haired dark-eyed japanese straight feminine girls. muu is the kind of person who likely feels totally outcast by her peers.

as well, taking a peek at this conversation in after pain:

with a very rough translation (i am not proficient in japanese, but this is the gist of the conversation)

it should be noted that muu's friends "A-" and "Sayu" appear to be talking about muu as if she is not present in the conversation, and their tone is almost mocking. muu retorts by claiming she has plenty more, and that her lipstick (which they are likely making fun of her for it being a cheap brand, though im not sure about this detail) is just an extra she had on hand. she gets defensive, and is likely lying to protect her "rich girl who has everything" image.

i would also like to point out that muu seems to have gotten nothing in return for her lipstick- and was likely lending it to her friend with no expectation. muu acts like she isnt a giving person, but genuinely seems to be thoughtful and generous towards those she cares about. this can also be seen with muu giving haruka "hand-me-down" hair clips. its a small gesture, but haruka wears and appreciates them- they keep his uncut hair out of his eyes, and its a small piece of her that he can wear. its a thoughtful gift

and secondly... doesnt anybody else think that its weird that weve seen NOTHING about her home life? with other prisoners, we see at least two aspects of their lives, if not more. haruka with his house v. the forest. yuno in the car, on the stairs, in the brothel-room, on dates. fuuta in the tunnel, the arcade, on the basketball court. shidou in his house, hospital, greenhouse. mahiru in the forest, her house, several pictures of her on outings in TIHTBILWY. kazui in his house and the bar, on the altar. amane in her house, on the street, though MAGIC primarily takes place in her "inner world". mikoto in his home and train station. kotoko in the warehouse, a bar, on the streets etc.

muu's videos take place entirely in her school. even her inner-world with the bright white walls and floors, where herself and her peers are bugs- its still her mental depiction of school. her home life is totally void in her videos. why? sure, it may not be important to her murder- but maybe, its more important than what we see in after pain and inmf

did you know that most bullies use bullying as a way to cope with lack of control in their lives? that bullies most often face harrassment at home, and that school is their only escape from abuse? those who bully their peers often mirror their own parents' actions towards them. school is likely the only place where muu has any sense of control in her life. yes, its bad that she bullied her peers, but she is a child who has no proper outlet for the pain that she faces

(i also believe that her hourglass imagery lends to a cycle of violence- that muu was likely bullied, became the bully, and lost her status only to get bullied once more)

but im going on a tangent

unfortunately at this point i am running out of steam and good examples to lend to why i believe muu is poor (please, if anyone else has any evidence to back this up, please do add on to this post! i love to hear the community's thoughts!)

but for one last, small point. let's take a look at muu's lunch. a simple bento

this bento is very small (a side note: i am also of the opinion that muu struggles with an ED) and it consists of a few simple ingredients.

a leaf of lettuce, cherry tomatoes, rice, a small amount of sauce, a single hot dog cut in the shape of an octopus, and what appears to be a hunk of protein, like chicken

well, thats not a lot of food. certainly nothing high-quality or expensive. lets take a look at some school lunches in japan. lets search up "学校 べんと" "gakkou bento" "school bento" and look at the images

muu's lunch certainly doesnt look all that filling. it most certainly does not look bougie and expensive

edit: i would also like to note that she parallels shidou as a partner prisoner. both feature the concept of lying and upholding a good image of oneself

[eshithepetty]

LISTEN. I KNOWWW that the polls haven't even started, but I'm impatient, ok, I'm just putting this out there now cause I can't take it..... anyways - I've seen people do powerpoints as a way to campaign for their blorbos in the various polls that have been going on, so!! I thought I'd do one of my own for the @autismswagsummit ^^ as I simply can't pass on any chance to be brainrotted over this series, it seems...

ID under cut, as it's very long!

[ID: a powerpoint presentation campaigning for Mob from Mob Psycho 100. It's formatted in dark purples and pinks.

The first slide is the titlecard, differing from the main slides by having a pink holographic aura, like the ones from the show, as the background. The text says:

"#MOBSWEEP 2023

Aka why you should vote for Mob in the upcoming autistic swag summit. Please

(JK follow your own heart ^^ but for your consideration:)"

The second slide is titled: "Who is Mob, aka Kageyama Shigeo?" and below the text lists:

"Source: Mob Psycho 100, which is also where Reigen comes from;

The protagonist! Only with background character syndrome (which is why he’s named ‘Mob’ – it’s kinda like naming your protag ‘John Doe’ lol);

A 14 year old with the psychic strength to destroy the world. Which he’s not very happy about actually;

Cause really, he’s just a nice, gentle boy who simply wants to improve and impress his crush by getting swole :) Oh, and he also experiences the horrors. Btw."

On the right of this text, there are two images: One is a zoomed in screenshot of Mob, his face blank and confused, and the other is an official art of the show, depicting Mob in the center, aura glowing, with many of the show's other characters around him, with the show's title at the bottom of the image.

The third slide's title is "Ok but tell me more about the autism", and below, the text says:

"Gladly ^^

Ok, first off – symptoms:

Bad at reading social cues, detecting sarcasm, lies, etc.;

Struggles with recognizing/expressing emotions. Has what could be called psychic meltdowns;

Very honest and blunt, sometimes appearing ‘ruthless’ as a result;

Explicitly low empathy, in that he can’t feel what others are feeling;

Actually very compassionate, and follows a really strict moral code;"

There are no images in this or the next slide.

The fourth slide is a continuation of the previous, with the text being:

"Abnormal reaction to sensations, but instead of overreacting, he underreacts, rarely responding to physical touch and disturbing imagery. Has shown to be at times sensitive to loud sounds, however;

Prefers following a routine. One of his biggest conflicts with Reigen literally arise from the man often calling him out of the blue and making him suddenly adapt, which Mob finds really annoying/upsetting;

Struggles in school. Explicitly bad at math, japanese and PE (really passionate about the latter tho), which could be for a variety of reasons, autism related conditions (like dyscalculia/dyslexia/dyspraxia) being one of them;

Has felt like an outcast for most of his life. Even if he grew up in a pretty loving environment, he recognizes that he is different to others, and people sometimes treat him as such (in a /neg way);

His main arc is about overcoming trauma and… just masking (and how to stop doing it), pretty much, lol."

The fifth slide, in contrast, is mostly just images, placed upon a white background. The title for this one is "Alternatively, just look at him:"

The images, from top to down, and then left to right, are:

Three cropped subtitles out of screenshots of the show, which say:

"I'm sure I just got the wrong idea again. How embarrassing."

"He's detached from urban legends, fads, and other hot topics among people."

"You just can't lie, can you?"

The fourth is a cropped screenshot of Mob's explosion meter. Both in Japanese and English. Specifically, it says: "Progress towards Mob's explosion: 92%". Additionally, there is an annotation above this image, saying: "Literally has a meltdown meter ksfdks"

In-between these and the next column of images, there is also a transparent image of Mob, him standing stiffly, faced towards the camera, his standard, blank expression with a small smile on his face.

The next column of images goes like this:

A screenshot from the show, done in paint on glass, of various kids towering over Mob, who's standing in the middle of the image, small. Their expressions wary, from sneering, to frowning, to looking disgusted. The subtitles at the bottom say, with one part blocked out due to spoilers: "[spoilers] didn't treat me any differently even though I could use psychic powers."

Next two are cropped dialogues as well. They say:

"This version of him was created from being suppressed and locked away."

"Social skills like that are beyond you."

And on the right of the slide is one vertical image, showing one of Mob's books, with the subtitles translating the Japanese title of the book as "The Proper Way of Reading the Room". Next to this one, there is also an annotation, saying: "He has a book on learning social cues :’)" That's all for this slide.

The sixth slide is titled "Is he good rep though?" Text below is:

"Well, to answer the first thing relevant to this question… no, he’s not actually confirmed canon autistic. But c’mon.. it’s so obvious. This kid is not fucking allistic like c’monnnn

Of course, what people consider good and bad rep is gonna vary from person to person. But to explain why a lot of people see him as very positive rep:

"1) He’s the main character, so he gets the most spotlight, and the narrative is formed around his pov, in that we only see things that are relevant to Mob, and visually things are often represented in the way Mob sees them as well (take the body improvement club or Tsubomi, for example), which puts all viewers soundly in his shoes and makes him easy to relate to and sympathize with, and makes it clear how important his emotions and view of things really are;"

On the right of this are 3 images against a white background. The first one is a screenshot of the Body Improvement Club - 5 very buff and large dudes - standing against an explosively red and yellow background, with all of them enthusiastically flexing. The caption below that is "The body improvement club! ...they're supposed to be middle schoolers lol".

The next two, below the first one, are two screenshots of Tsubomi. The one on the left has her smiling, her eyes wide and bright, the background being pastel pinks and yellows. The one on the right, however, has her frowning, the background turned black, her eyes dark and disinterested. The caption below says: "Tsubomi :) And how her design subtly changes alongside Mob’s view of her".

The seventh slide is a continuation of the previous, with the text being:

"2) He’s a very well rounded character, with well thought out strengths, flaws, motives, and his overall story is very cohesive and satisfying; 3) His autistic traits are portrayed neutrally – in both where they help, and where they can cause conflict. It balances between him learning what things he would benefit to address and deal with, and what things he shouldn’t be trying to change at all, and as the whole message of the show emphasizes – he is no more or less special than anyone, no more or less of a person – he is simply human, and his autistic traits are just part of what makes him himself."

This one has images next to it as well. The first one is a screenshot of Reigen looking towards the camera (at an off-screen Mob), hand to his chin, eyebrow raised and smiling, some food crumbs still stuck to his face, as he says: "Today you happened to save some people that only you could have saved." Next to it is the annotation: "Reigen reassuring Mob about how his inability to read the room and feel empathy actually can be a huge benefit sometimes :)"

The next image below is a zoom in of Mob's face, his eyes shadowed by his hair, the scene's lighting dark, as he says: "I'm not being mocked, nor am I easily taken advantage of." The annotation next to this one says "Mob learning to recognize his emotions and assert himself better as the story goes on!"

And the last two images is a screenshotted dialogue, saying "You don't think changing yourself for someone you love is natural?" "I don't. At least, not when we're talking about [spoilers]" (The last bit is blocked out again).

The eight slide is also a continuation. The text says:

"4) He is loved. Loved by his friends, his family, his allies… even most villains come to take a liking to him. In fact, he’s something I haven’t seen many autistic characters be – he’s admired! So many characters, and even viewers of the show I’ve found, really admire him and want to be more like him. And not because he’s a perfect person, or super smart or anything, but because he sincerely tries his best. And I just really appreciate that, personally,, 5) And more than just loved, he is accepted – the whole main arc and the resolution of his story centers around that, around how important it is to feel accepted by the people around you, in all your entirety, no matter how strange or destructive you may feel yourself to be. And how you need to come to accept yourself in the same way as well. I just think that’s a really sweet in a story centering around a neurodivergent person :’)"

And the images next to it are as follows:

A screenshot of dialogue from the show, saying: "At first glance, Mob may seem unreliable, but his strength is undeniable." The annotation clarifies with: "The ‘strength’ in question, in this case, being Mob’s ability to reach out to people ^^";

A screenshot of Teru placed against a blindingly white background, him grinning widely, looking down, eyes shining, as he says: "I knew it, you really are amazing!". Next to him, there is a small caption of "Lol gayass /pos";

And a screenshot of Mob, in the bottom center of the image, small, as he is surrounded by various characters. Most of them are smiling encouragingly, with the ones closest to him, like Reigen, Ritsu, Dimple, Teru and Tsubomi, being bigger and placed in the front. A small caption at the top says: "He has so many friends and allies ueueeueueue.."

The ninth slide is titled "Additionally:" and the text lists:

"Psychic powers as a metaphor for being nd/othered, if that suits your fancy;

His design is iconic and versatile;

The boy has. Issues;;

There are many other characters in mp100 who can be read as autistic. Not a single neurotypical in this show /hj

Mob has more than just autism swag. I’ve seen people with bipolar disorder, ADHD, anxiety and those who are plural (etc.) also relate to him :)

He is simply the Boy ever"

Next to the last line is a small, low quality image of Mob smiling from the manga. The rest of the images, on the right, are:

The meme "I can be your angle....or yuour devil", with images of Mob instead - on the left, him smiling brightly and blushing, placed upon a colorful magenta background, and on the right, a panel from the manga: Mob in one of his explosion states, surrounded by fire, face shadowed, hair pushed back by his powers and waving in the air, and his eyes, wide and eerie, being the only features on his face that are visible.

On the right of these images, there is a smaller one, of Mob in another one of his explosion states (the one from episode 3, season 1 of the anime). He is facing to the side, aura surrounding him, hair pushed back by his powers and his eyes a glower. His pupils are red.

Below these, there are three images of, in order, Serizawa, Tome and Ritsu. Serizawa is sweating, nervous, Tome is sweating even more and yelling into a phone, and Ritsu is simply glaring towards the camera. The annotation pointing to them says: "A few of the other autistic blorbos in question :] (as I personally see them at least)".

And the last is a panel from the manga, of Mob sobbing, tears and drool dripping messily down his face, his hair waving in the air. His expression is somewhat blank despite the clear distress, and the text boxes next to him read: "His tears won't stop. It's an emotion he has never experienced before."

And the tenth, final slide, is formatted the same as the titlecard with the pink aura background, and says:

"Thank you if you got this far <3

Have good days everyones, and remember, the true win for autism is the fun we had along the way :]

Buh bye!! ^_^"

Around this text, there are various images of Mob. Counter clockwise, starting at the left corner:

A low quality screenshot of Mob flying in the air;

Mob, in his puppy hoodie, sweating in distress as he points at a vase;

Mob caught mid smear frame, his leg kicked high in the air as he jumps, his school bag swinging to the side, his expression comically flustered.

A panel from the manga. Mob's eyes are shadowed, chopsticks held to his face, as he stares to the side and says "Tch... Shut up and eat.";

A Mob in an alleyway from the anime, smiling, pointing and looking up and to the left (the center of the slide);

A photo of a Mob plushie tucked into bed;

A low quality screenshot of Mob, standing against a wire fence, facing forwards, his eyes appearing a bit angry due to his hair cowering them.

End ID.]

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#370

“Here we are boy, once again.  The last time we met, you ran screaming like a nellie girl.  I haven’t changed.  I’m still the sadistic asshole I was two years ago when we reconnected.  If anything, I now demand more.  I told you before that I ain’t changing who or what I am nor what I want and expect from a faggot bitch cunt toilet.  I have to ask, what’s different about you?...

“Oh, you have embraced chastity.  Well that’s a start.  You wearing the cage now?...  Let me see….  Faggot!  Do you really think I want to see it hanging out of a zipper?  Don’t be so stupid.  Get the fuck naked.  The cool spring morning doesn’t bother me.  That means it doesn’t bother you. 

“…Wait.  Stop.  Did you shave your chest?...  No, you had your hair removed.  Continue stripping….  Faggot, I have to say, I’m surprised with that.  Pleasantly surprised…  Take all your clothes and place them in the bed of the truck.  Fold them first.  Place your phone, keys, ID, and any money on top of your clothes. 

“Good Faggot.  Now, bring that pee pee in a cage to me. 

“Where’s the key?  At home?  Faggot, you are going to get beat for denying me access to my toys.  The cage is one of those cheap assed ones that slaves can pull out of.  With a yank, I got the shaft out.  And if I squeeze these balls.  Shut up!  I don’t want to hear a cunt scream this early in the morning.  You know these balls are going to be in perpetual pain from this point on.  Finish stripping and let me get my bag….

“…Hold this.  What you are holding is a proper cage for a faggot bitch.  Notice how there’s virtually no room at all for your pee pee shaft?  As small as your thing is, this cage will keep it from wanting to get hard.  Here, take this water bottle.  That’s my morning piss, nice and cold.  Before you chug it down—and yes you will—take these two pills.  One keeps you limp, and one keeps your horniness down.  I own a urologist slave in Memphis. who told me about how to administer them.  I order it to take them daily to negate its own pee pee as well.  It hasn’t had a hard-on for years.  In fact, each of my long-distance slave properties takes them.  When I return back home to Denver and you are here alone, I expect you to send me a video text of you swallowing your daily dose.  Slaves are not entitled to sexual gratification unless I say so.  That ain’t happening…. Ever.  Drink up. 

“The only time a slave is permitted to cum without permission is if it does it hands free while being beaten by me.  I’ve only seen it happen with one property.  It was from Miami.  Its pee pee was soft in the cage the entire time.  It was great.  I even kept on beating it after its climax.  Its almost lost all interest in serving me in that moment.  That’s why no cumming for any of my property.

“You are shivering.  Let’s get you some heat.  Remember this tiny bottle?  No?  I never used this on you?  For the longest time, I couldn't find it in any drug store. Recently I found it on-line. It’s called Heet, and it’s an old school pain reliever for arthritis.  Stand still.  I need to wipe this dauber along your pee pee shaft, and around the head.  Your ball sack should be covered too.  Turn around and pull your cheeks apart.  Let me see your cunt.  Nice.  And a swipe up the crack, and a double swipe along the cunt lips.  Now stand up and face me.

“Now I wait a few moments…  There it is!  What?  Does your pee pee and balls feel like a thousand hot needles are being shoved in?  Your cunt too?  You are in excruciating pain?  Well let me see.  The instructions say, ‘Do not apply to sensitive areas.’  I thought it said, ‘Do apply…’  Oops.  My bad. 

“Ha ha ha.  I’ve been using this on faggot bitches for years.  I’m surprised I hadn’t used it on you on one of my visits here.  Well I need to make up for that.  Quit fidgeting.  It’s only temporary, about three or four hours of nonstop pain.

“Focus on me.  Quit thinking of the burning sensation in your crotch.  That’s nothing compared to the hell I have in store for you this weekend.  The last time you tried to submit to me you had an issue with eating my shithole.  I have a test for you.  You fail it, I will drive off, leaving you buck naked out here at this dead-end road.  I’ll throw your car keys out of my window as I drive off. 

“It’s time for you to eat my ass.  Here, help me get out of these jeans and briefs.

“There is no act that a slave can do to accept its role as my property more than sticking its tongue into my shithole for an extended period.  If I remember, this is what made you run last time.  Don’t worry, I already had my morning dump.  Oh wow, look at my skid marks.  It’s going to be nasty for you.  The hotel I’m staying at has the worst toilet paper.  I do prefer the tongue of a faggot slave to clean me up. 

“I want to feel those hands pulling apart my cheeks, followed by the wetness from your tongue on my hole….  I’m only feeling hands.  Fag, if you balk on this, I’m out of here.  I know you hate the idea.  That’s what makes me want to do it more.  You want to be a slave to a sadistic cruel master, that means doing nasty shit.  If I don’t feel a tongue in the next…

“There you go….  No fucking retching.  You told me that you want this life as a total faggot toilet cunt slave, you accept your role and its responsibilities.  You yearn to serve me with your disgust.  Your revulsion gets me hard.  If I find out you like to do something, I lose interest in doing it.  You want to stop doing toilet duties, then love it.  You have to really mean it.  I can recognize when a faggot bitch is trying to manipulate me.  It’s obvious, and it never ends well for the cunt toilet.

“This is what, my fifth time with you?  You ever wonder why I keep coming back and giving you a try?  I mean, each time you put up limits for me.  I should just dump you.  But I don’t.  One could say it’s pity.  Another could say that it’s hard to find a cunt bitch when I come to town.  While both of those reasons contribute, no there is another reason.

“Stick your tongue in my shithole.  Clean what you can on the inside, toilet cunt.

“Do you remember your ad on Craig’s List that got me to contact you?  I do.  ‘Oversexed 23-year-old seeks dominant top to expand kinky limits.’  That was about ten years ago.  When I walked into your apartment, I encountered something I don’t encounter that often, truly.  I have said that I don’t care to piss off 99% of the population to get that 1%.  Not only did you have the demeanor, you craved to serve me.  Back then you didn’t have that much experience in anything.  You had that hunger.  You took my beatings.  You suffered with every lash.  I could tell that you wanted it to end, but you saw that I was enjoying it, and you pushed through.  With each visit, I saw your growth.  Hell, I tell you to get your hair removed last time, and you went ahead and did it,… permanently.  It took a long time to get you to this place in your head.  I’m here to take advantage of it.

“You can take a beating, but it’s the extra raunch that bothers you.  I told you that if I came back this time, that you will either make the commitment to me or that I will be done with you.  On this visit, you will become a full-fledged toilet, my toilet.  That won’t happen unto Thursday night.  You have three days to put your head in the right spot.  Normally I wouldn’t dream of telling a faggot bitch slave what I had planned, but for you, I need for it to stew in your head. 

“For the next three days, you will be my urinal, drinking every drop.  You will give me a blumpkin and be my toilet paper, just like you are doing now.  You will stay with me at my hotel, sleeping on the bathroom floor chained to the toilet.  I’m gonna beat the fuck out of you.  I may even fuck you.  The next three days is going to be hell.

“You done back there?  Pull back.  Your face is a mess.  Good keep it that way.  I want you to smell me throughout the day.  While I am planning on taking you around with me to the sites I need to hit, you will probably remain in my truck.  You did pass this test.

“Stay there kneeling on the gravel.

“Thursday night however, your suffering, your submission, your service, and your sacrifice will be tested.  If you pass, I will take ownership of you.  My urologist slave will come in from Memphis, as I want a doctor nearby.  We are going to an old friend’s ranch out of town.  He too has slaves.  He’s allowing me the privacy to take ownership of you.

“After a day of not eating, you will straddle a wooden sawhorse.  Your ankles will be secured stretched painfully apart, making the ability of pulling off of a very thick butt plug impossible.  After taking off your cage, I will drive a two-inch common nail through your dickhead into the sawhorse.  I will hit the nail on its side to bend it, to make removal quite painful.  I will hand you a plate with my dump from the day.  You will be expected to eat it all.  While that is happening, I will be using my favorite whips and belts to turn your back into hamburger.  I will only stop when the plate is licked clean.

“Help me get my pants on.  I can see the revulsion in your eyes.  Look at my dick.  I am rock hard and leaking.  You know that the next few days is going to make me horny and happy. 

“Your suffering will bring me satisfaction.  My gratification is your motivation. 

“But should that change, or should I feel you are not living up to your full potential, we can end this.  Either one.  All you have to say is you want out.  Disappointingly, I will say that I will be giving up on you.  I will pull over in the truck and let you out.  You’ll have to fend for yourself to get back home or here to your car.  You’ll be naked of course.

“Speaking of which, I’m going to pull out, leaving you and your locked car here.  I’m going to be waiting at the fork in the road, which was about a quarter mile back, or maybe it was a half mile.  I’m going to wait for about 20 minutes for you to come to me.  No, make it 30 minutes.  This is a dirt road, and you have no shoes.  During that stroll, I want you to think about what lies ahead of you.  If you decide to back out, no problem.  I’ll just pull away.  I’ll drop off your clothes, keys, phone, etc. on your front doorstep.  You still live in the same house?  Good. 

“Hey!  The sun is coming up.  That should help you to warm up.  It’s a beginning of a new day.”

[surrealistghostboy]

I’m on vacation in a big city right now, and I’ve got this fantasy I can’t get over. Me and my friend are out and we get invited to a party by some locals. We don’t know them well but we can’t say no to a genuine local city experience. Starting off the night with some pregame, my friend takes a few shots and I’m limited to two. I’m such a lightweight, really. It’s bad. Even after two shots I’m extra giggly and excited to see everyone. So pliable.

Mixed drinks in my hands and my location on, my friend and I make our way to the appartment address we were given. It’s dingy and the walls are tagged. If I wasn’t tipsy I’d turn around right away. But I want to see our hosts again! They were so nice. My friend knocks on the door and we giggle at how loud they were being. The door is opened by a shorter guy in a beanie, maybe Mexican descent. There is music pounding and a few other people there…strangely not enough for you to call it a party. The guy at the door invites us in, offering us drinks and urging us to let loose. Women in skimpy shorts and bralette tops walk around, boys and girls finding each other to make out. The ceiling is hazy with a thick layer of smoke from all the blunts being smoked.

I’m drinking and the smoke in the air makes my head feel cloudy. I’m giggling and stumbling as I dance along to the music. Eventually I stumble my way into a guy. He’s tall with long hair, nice stubble of a beard too. He coos at me and cups my chin, telling me how I should sit down. A pretty little thing like me could get hurt with the way I was dancing. He plops down on a filthy couch in the corner, pulling me to straddle his lap. I want him to light up a joint and offer it to me. I don’t smoke much but I want to seem cool. Not that he gives me much of a choice. The man presses the joint between my lips and I inhale out of shock. We pass the joint back and forth and at some point he stops taking hits. But I’m too high to notice.

I want him to take my drink and set it aside, bouncing his knee and making me whine. He’s just moving to the music, he tells me. But his knee is way too fast to be moving to the music. I want him to turn me around to face the dingy room we’re in and spread my legs. I’m so pliant and high I can’t even fight back. My skin feels like it’s on fire everywhere he touches me. I lay my head back on his shoulder as his hands begin to travel my body. All my clothes are kinda prudish, sweaters and long pants covering my body. So he pushes my sweater up over my binder in one swoop and begins to squish and knead my hips and stomach.

“Wait, that’s embarrassing-“ I’d whine.

“Oh honey it’s about to get a lot more embarrassing…” the guy mumbles into my ear. His hands move down from my hips and to my pants, shimmying them down so I’m just in my boxers. He places a large hand in between my legs and presses down into my tdick, making me rut into his hand unintentionally. “God, you’re a whore…” he’d laugh, “I ain’t even done nothing to you yet and look at you! Grinding into some strangers hand…”

Id whine and shake my head, I’m not a whore!! It’s just all the smoke and the alcohol and just the…the atmosphere and everything. It’s making me stupid. And it feels like everyone is watching me. Watching me half naked, rubbing myself into this guy’s hand. I don’t know where my friend is anymore. I have an audience now. The guy just chuckles and slips his hands down my boxers and runs a finger up my slit. “Jesus, you’re soaked…” he takes two fingers and clamps them down on my tdick. Rubbing it between his thumb and fore finger, pinching and pulling occasionally. It’s making me yelp and jerk my body around. But the guys just pulls me back down into his lap cooing at me like I’m stupid.

“Hey, hey, it’s ok baby. Just feel it, c’Mon.” His fingers are big and rough, so much different than my own. And they don’t stop. My fingers can never keep up with my need. I always give up and use a toy. But he just doesn’t stop!! Heat pools in my stomach and shoots up my spine whenever he pinches my dick. Little gasps exit my mouth in whines and “nngh”.

“Oh, fuck fuck fuck fuuuck!!” My voice cracks in a shrill way and I feel the pad of his finger move up and down, up and down. It’s so fast but I can feel each movement is a hyper intense way. It might have been the t shot I’d taken the week before. I’m so wet too, it would be so easy to just- “ah-!” I’d squeal as he’d slip two fingers inside me. “Sorry sweetheart, those just popped in. Not my fault. You’re so wet.” He’d thrust his fingers in and tap my insides quickly. “Slutty hole just sucked my fingers right in.” His fingers don’t seem sorry. They’re pumping in and out of me, my juices occasionally squirting out into his jeans. I’m mewling and shaking and my hands are tipping anything I can find purchase on. I’ve only ever fingered myself. Even then my fingers are too small to reach anything inside me. But the stranger’s fingers are so big and they reach so deep inside- fingering feels amazing! Fuck I’d never thought I could come without someone touching my dick but this could change my mind!

“Another! Please!” I wailed out reaching down to grab his hand. My own hand fails about, I can’t decide between shoving my own fingers in as well or making him force more of his thick fingers into my boy cunt. He chuckles darkly and shoves in the rest of his fingers at once.

“Careful what you wish for, baby…”

Should I continue this?

[woso-dreamzzz]

i feel like alba taking bambi is a bit extreme. hear me out! like yes ofc caring for one kid more than the other is bad!! but with the whole ale forgetting bambi at daycare it’s like what parent hasn’t forgot to pick up their kid once. like does that make sense like i feel like especially because it happend only once and she was at her job when she forgot that shouldn’t warrant alba legit taking her daughter away from her? like it just wasnt THAT big of a deal like ofc it’s not good but i think alba is reacting a bit over the top about it. idk maybe my perspective is different, but what do you think? id love to hear your opinion as the writer

I don't think you guys understand just how much I love answering these kinds of asks. Also, sorry in advance because this is going to be a lot of psych ramble but genuinely parent-child relationships and their impacts are actually so fascinating to me

So, the whole Alexia forgetting Bambi thing would be a big escalation if that was the only reason Alba had for removing Bambi from her home. It looks like the only reason but there were a lot of other things that Alba would have noticed when she got Bambi from nursery.

So, first of all, what Alexia's been doing is emotional neglect. Compared to other forms of neglect, emotional neglect is one of the harder ones to recognise because it's not as obvious as something like physical neglect.

The signs are very subtle and it's difficult to notice if you're not a child's primary caregiver.

From Bambi's perspective, she's been shoved to the side a bit since Jaume was born. She was never really close to Olga so she can cope with that in a sense (not that she should have to) but Alexia's disregard for her definitely hits hard.

It's a lot of little things built up onto each other. In Injured IV, when Alexia comes home she immediately greets Olga and Jaume but doesn't even spare Bambi a look. Bambi stays under that coffee table for quite a while in the hope that Alexia will notice she's not there and look for her but she never does.

She also mentions when Jaume isn't 'being good' then she doesn't get things like a bedtime story or cuddles at bed which is essentially her equating Jaume crying with the fact that Alexia yet again forgetting about her and that his needs trump her own.

There's also the fact that all of Bambi's individual pictures have been changed to ones of her and Jaume which leads to her thinking that she's only worth anything if her brother is attached to it. Similarly, all of the pictures she drew have been taken off the fridge in favour of a photo of Olga, Alexia and Jaume. Even when she lets Alba put her drawing up in Injured IV, she places it on the side of the fridge where it won't be seen as clearly.

Bambi also learnt how to cry quietly. When Kids are younger they can't communicate their feelings properly and crying loudly gets the attention of a caregiver so they can receive comfort. Bambi's learnt to cry quietly because she knows that no one will come to give her comfort if Jaume is also crying even though there are two adults in the house, one for each of them.

Emotional neglect really builds on a child as young as Bambi and causes effects like low self-esteem, depression and anxiety and in more extreme cases failure to thrive and Bambi, sadly, is on track for all of them.

Now, that's all from Bambi's perspective and, of course, Alba can't know all of that because she's not Bambi's primary caregiver.

She can only go off on what she can see. What she knows for sure, at first, is that Alexia and Olga have both forgotten Bambi.

That isn't what makes her take Bambi though.

She gets a notification from the Barca account saying that they're meeting their youngest teammate and it's got a picture of Alexia, Olga and Jaume so it's not like both of them were super busy and that's why they forgot Bambi.

There's also the change in routine that Bambi mentions. She used to get a new train every week and when Alba mentions that, she finds out that Bambi hasn't received a new train in weeks (more like months) which is a massive deviation from an established routine.

There's also the celebration they watch on tv with Alexia winning the Copa de la Reina and all those pictures of her with Jaume and the cup and there's no hint at all that she realises Bambi isn't there with her.

There's obviously Bambi's reaction to that too and her tearing up the picture because she doesn't think it's real (bearing in mind that it's a picture of her, Alexia, Olga and Jaume as a family).

It's clear to Alba that something is going on and Bambi isn't doing well because she's been in such a sad mood since she picked her up and then Bambi hides herself away in her room and Alba can't get the door open.

It's a pretty big emotional outburst from Bambi and quite out of character to how she had been previously.

Honestly, everything is out of character from what Alba previously knows - both Alexia and Bambi and it's enough for her to think that perhaps the two need to be separated.

The anger from Injured IV comes in because it's been hours since the final ended and Bambi hid herself away compared to when Alexia, Olga and Jaume come home.

Throughout that entire time, Bambi wasn't even a thought. Alexia didn't even realise Bambi had been left at nursery until she got home which is hours after Alba had to cancel her own plans to get Bambi.

The anger probably escalated the situation a bit more than it needed to but Alba had hours to stew and piece everything together so Bambi's removal from Alexia was warranted once she'd put it all together.

That's all from Inured IV, not onto Injured V:

So childhood emotional neglect is especially impactful the younger a child is. Bambi is around 4 and she's at that age where she's beginning to understand her own and others emotions. Having a stable caregiver to help her work through this is crucial and she doesn't have that so there's a big chance that she'll be developmentally delayed because of it.

This, of course, could lead to big impacts down the road when she goes to school and makes friends and even when she gets older and develops adult relationships.

She's already got low self-worth and is trying to be too independent at too young an age because to her, nobody wants to pay attention to her.

In Injured V, she actually flinches away from Alexia when she tries to grab her because she's now used to being ignored by her mother and having Alexia suddenly wanting her is overwhelming and strange.

It's seen in Injured V how different Bambi is in Alexia's home vs Alba's home when she's genuinely excited to show Alba the picture she made because she's still in her developmental stage and is still able to adapt and come back from this - at least in a way that will have minimal impact on her emotional development and regulation.

Of course, we also find out that Bambi at least suspects that she wasn't as planned as previously thought. She knows Jaume was definitely planned but she's slowly finding out that she wasn't so that's another hit to her confidence. She equates how Jaume is being treated to him being wanted and how she's being treated to her not being wanted.

When Eli comes and all of this comes out, it's clear that this is deep rooted stuff.

As I said previously, emotional neglect is one of the forms of neglects that's hardest to notice. Alba has no way of knowing just how long this has been going on for and just how close this is to having extremely detrimental effects to Bambi's emotional development.

The low self-esteem is already there. She's nervous at the thought of seeing Alexia, Olga and Jaume so there's some anxiety setting in too. For all Alba knows, the depression could be next and if she had left Bambi there, the potential of failure to thrive is quite high too.

So, honestly, Alba removing Bambi was probably the best way to do it. With Bambi with Alba, she would know how she was doing and even if she had left Bambi there and explained what was happening to Alexia, there was always a chance that it could regress back to the neglect again even if Alexia promised to work on it.

Honestly, the standard practice for suspected emotional neglect should be to report it to child services so Alba is actually doing Alexia a favour by not getting them involved.

But, yeah, this is really long but those are essentially the thought processes of everyone 🤷‍♀️

[grumpybunny-edith]

Gwen's Bunny HRT - Month 1 (Part 1)

I look at my reflection for what feels like the hundredth time today, waffling on how to do it. All the other girls have already gone through all this, and compared to their one-month photos, I feel... Behind. Delilah had already started growing fur in some places, and Edith already had a little bit of tail growing in. Sure, it looked a little weird without any fur on it, but... I’ve got nothing there but soreness. Is it even worth celebrating? Like, “oh yay, my ears look longer if you squint and my teeth look a little sillier”.  

I take a deep breath and dig my toes into my carpet, feeling pain flare up in them. It just started a couple days ago — maybe it would be better to wait until something came of it? Until walking on my toes didn’t hurt so bad, or even felt better than walking on my heels? 

I feel a tiny impulse at the small of my back, my spine apparently doing its best to wiggle at its base. Am I... unconsciously wagging my tail? The soreness that comes with it matches what the other girls had talked about. I smile, showing my reflection my weird teeth and the pain subsides a little. 

“Bunnies wag their tails when they’re upset,” Edith had told me once. It’s warming to feel how right she is, to feel like I actually belong, even for a second. It’s not that the other girls haven’t done a good job of making me think so; it’s just hard to see all of them so far along and then to look at myself. 

I set my phone down and stare at myself for a while. I imagine the fur suddenly sprouting up all across my body, shiny and soft. I imagine my ears getting so tall they graze the doorway. I imagine my tail, tiny and fluffy, poking out just about the hem of my sweatpants. It makes me smile and laugh at myself, and I feel a bit of pride in my teeth. They’ll look better coupled with everything else, I think. 

I hear my phone buzz, trying to avoid convincing myself it’s because my hearing has spontaneously improved. I laugh it off and check what it was. 

raeraebun: Hey girl!! Today’s one month, right?? Where’s the update??

I smile and blush instinctively. Rae and I don’t chat that much, but every time we do it lifts my whole mood. She’s also dropped by my place a couple times because she “made too many brownies and just had to make a delivery”. 

wen-kutesuli: Hey! Idk if I’m gonna do it today honestly lol 

raeraebun: Aww, why not? i mean like do whatever you want obvi but. you okay?

I sigh. I know I can probably tell her, it’ll almost definitely be fine, and she probably has something great to say. But it doesn’t make it any easier to say it. I’m almost embarrassed to still feel the way that I do even after her and Edith’s constant preaching of “loving yourself wherever you are”. 

wen-kutesuli: Yeah I’m okay lol. Just kinda 

wen-kutesuli: Wish I had more to show, I guess? 

Rae’s response comes quite literally instantly. 

raeraebun: GWENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

raeraebun: okay 

raeraebun: lemme show you something 

When Rae comes back after a couple minutes of digging, she sends me a picture of some random girl with hair like her own, followed by five closeups of a pretty standard human ear. 

raeraebun: so like

raeraebun: this was from january last year 

raeraebun: Id been on hrt for like. a month and a half to the day

raeraebun: I had taken a picture of myself every day since starting my regimen

raeraebun: and didnt see anything until that picture when FINALLY 

raeraebun: my ears had grown the tiniest little bit. 

raeraebun: I didnt stop screaming about it all day lol ashley got so sick of it 

raeraebun: and yk what happened next?

raeraebun: they stayed just like that for three more weeks LMAO

Rae has this way of making people smile and cry their eyes out at the same time. 

raeraebun: so... be nice to yourself? its not gonna happen all at once, and thats ok. every little bit is worth, like

raeraebun: I dunno 

raeraebun: a thousand parties

wen-kutesuli: That’s a lot of parties 

raeraebun: and you earn every single one of them :) 

I sit in stunned silence so pleased I don’t know what to do with myself. My body wants some kind of release, and I let it have one, laying face down and kicking my feet so quickly and so hard into the floor it probably upset the people below me. 

raeraebun: you dont have to, but we all wanna celebrate with you :D 

wen-kutesuli: Thank you 🩵 Maybe I’ll do it 

raeraebun: YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

raeraebun: GO GWENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

---

Thank you to @flightlessbirdgirl for helping me decide on Gwen's username and for letting me bounce ideas off it!

Next

[louellaby]

FORGET-ME-NOT

REPLACED!MC AU

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

W A R N I N G

May contain bad grammar, limited vocabulary, and OOC characters. Please mind that English is not my first language, and it takes a lot of courage for me to post due to my anxiety and paranoia.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

taglist: @books-and-catears @owl778 @yourlocalgrass @kaiserkisser

PROLOGUE | CHAPTER I | CHAPTER II | CHAPTER III | LOUE'S LETTER | CHAPTER IV | CHAPTER V | LOUE'S LETTER | CHAPTER VI | CHAPTER VII | CHAPTER VIII | CHAPTER IX | CHAPTER X | LOUE'S LETTER | EPILOGUE

C H A P T E R V I

「 A Chat Under the Stars 」

A beautiful night sky blessed the grand ball being held at the Demon Lord's Castle. The sky had a darker colour, mixed with purple and blue hues as if it were painted by the most skilled painter. The stars did their best to outshine the beautiful glow of the moon, illuminating the whole realm. It was certainly a wonderful sight to behold.

After the prince's and his butler's welcoming speeches, everyone was left to their own enjoyment. Chatter filled the room as everyone met up with the people they knew. But you? You stayed in place; back against the wall, and an empty glass in hand. It was previously filled with the most exquisite Demonus, but before you knew it, you already chugged it down. Not one drop remaining. You thought you would enjoy the party, maybe even get the chance to talk to your demons again, but somehow Soley was always there to take them away just before they could even notice your presence.

You previously arrived at the castle with three angels and one sorcerer, but they got swept away from you by their adoring crowd. You watched as Solomon laughed along with other sorcerers and witches. Simeon was with Luke, discussing Devildom food with the other angels who were invited, and Cassiel was nowhere on the floor to be found. The more you watched, the more lonely you felt. You already tried hard enough to catch everyone's attention, but enough was enough. To calm your aching head, you stepped outside for a while and into the quiet gardens you ventured. You were hoping to be alone, to do some thinking, but there you found Cassiel, along with Leviathan. They seemed to be in the middle of a conversation, something you didn't mean to listen to.

"I already told you multiple times, Levi. You don't need to act like that around me just because we technically aren't brothers anymore."

"A-Are you sure...? I just th-thought that you would be disappointed with me. I know it was a long time ago, but I... I did fall..."

"... Are you saying all this because you feel guilty falling with your brothers?"

"What? O-Of course not! No matter where they go, I'm always there to follow them!"

"Then stop acting all sad whenever you see me. That's not the look I want to see whenever we meet, you know. No matter what you become, Levi, you'll always be my brother. You and your brothers will always be family to me, and I'm proud of all of you."

"C-C-Cassiel...!"

"Wh-Whoa, hey, don't cry!"

A smile slowly appeared on your face as you watched the Avatar of Envy cling onto the angel in front of him. He sobbed so loudly that you couldn't hear what Cassiel was telling him, but you know that he was trying to comfort the demon. The moonlight illuminated both of them in their embrace. It was a beautiful view. Until Leviathan's D.D.D. rang, and he answered the call immediately upon seeing the ID.

"I-I'll be right there...!" With him only saying that in return, the caller hung up on him. You already had a feeling who it was, and apparently Cassiel did, too.

"Let me guess... the little princess wants you to pick up the toy she purposely dropped?"

"Cassiel... th-that's..."

"I'm sorry, Levi, don't mind me. Go on ahead and help her. I'll be staying here."

"Thanks...! I'll see you again later!"

As soon as Leviathan ran off back inside the castle, Cassiel cleared his throat and turned your way, looking at you straight in the eye. "It's quite rude to eavesdrop, you know." Despite him saying that, he had a gentle smile on his face. "Step into the light with me, MC. You'll be able to feel its warmth."

"Does the moon emit warmth?" You questioned with an innocent twinkle in your eyes, heading towards him and taking his outstretched hand. He was slightly taken aback and chuckled at your question, covering his mouth with the back of his free hand as he looked at you.

"Well, no, I don’t think so. But tonight's special, so it might? Maybe you can stay here with me long enough until we feel it. What do you say?" He was looking at you with gentle eyes. With his question, you felt like he was holding his hand out for you to take even when you were already holding it, so in return, you gave his hand a light squeeze, which he appreciated. The two of you found a place in the garden where the moon shone the brightest. Cassiel pulled out a blanket out of thin air and laid it on the grass before ushering you to sit down next to him.

"How did you do that, Cassiel?"

"Someone I know has always been fond of picnics since he was a child, so I taught myself how to conjure up objects such as this. It's quite handy for such occasions, isn't it?"

"Yeah, that's amazing!"

"Oh, it's hardly that. You're a sorcerer yourself, MC. Surely, something like this is elementary for you."

"I, well, I didn't learn something like that yet... Oh, but I can summon my pact demons whenever I want!"

Cassiel raised his eyebrow at you before slightly nodding to himself. "You mean the seven brothers, right? You must have a lot of power and influence on them to be able to summon them whenever it suits you. I'm glad that it's you who has that power over them and not..." He trailed off, eyes wandering to the lake that rested in front of you both. He watched as the water rippled with every leaf and flower petal that fell onto its surface. You already knew what he was trying to say.

It looked like Cassiel didn't like Soley. Maybe he still didn't get over the girl's first impression on everyone. But your first impression of Cassiel himself wasn't a nice one either.

"To be frank, and I mean no offence to you, Prince Diavolo, but I never wanted to attend this school. A place crawling with demons is not a pretty sight for me, but I have a duty to uphold. It is the very reason for my presence here.

Please do not misunderstand anything."

You laughed at the thought, wondering how Cassiel changed in only a few months. Whenever you saw him at school, talking with demons, he had a smile on his face. It wasn't a forced smile out of politeness, no. It was genuine. He really was enjoying himself.

"You must be wondering what changed me, mustn't you?" As if he could read your mind, Cassiel gazed at you with a slight smirk. His head rested on the back of his hand that lay on his bent knee. Your surprised face made him laugh before he sighed and turned his head back to the water, adjusting his glasses and resting his chin on his hand. "To be honest, I didn't actually change. I was just lying when I said I didn't want to attend this school. In fact, it was me who begged Michael to let me participate as an exchange student for the new school year."

"Then why did you lie on the first meeting?"

"Well, I... I was scared." You felt the angel's hand twitch as he spoke. He chuckled to himself before shaking his head. "But it turns out I had nothing to be afraid of. The brothers still treated me the same way they did before the war, so I thought that I could stop pretending and just be honest with them. I still love them as my family, even when most of the angels don't anymore."

"Did you... Did you wish you fell with them?"

Silence met both of you as the angel wandered in his thoughts. He tried to pick the right words to say, but what exactly were the right words for that question?

Yes, he wished that it was different. He wished to have followed the brothers down into the Devildom, but fear stopped him from taking that first step. And because of that fear, he kept regretting it to this very day.

"That's enough about me," he said with a shaky sigh before fidgeting with his glasses a little and taking you in his sight once again. "Tell me how you've been, MC. I'm sorry I haven't been able to spend time with you at all, but you always seemed so busy with the others."

Was he jealous? But why would he be? You two haven't even exchanged many words until tonight. You averted your gaze and tilted your head up, admiring the shine of the stars out of your reach.

"Have you..." You paused to think, trying to gather your thoughts into clear sentences. "What would you do if... if you don't feel welcome at a certain place anymore? Like, I mean, what if that place was something you love because your, uhm, family was in it?"

Was that too obvious?

As you hoped he wouldn't understand the meaning behind your words— or maybe you did, you kept staring at the night sky, which turned out to be embarrassing to keep your face visible, so instead, you hung your head low. You couldn't see Cassiel's expression, so you didn't know that he actually got your message. He stared at you, wide-eyed as he was surprised. He already saw how close Soley was getting to the brothers. He didn't like it either, but the fact that they were pushing you aside just for her? He was furious. How could they?

In the Celestial Realm, they kept receiving news about how you were making the brothers' lives better; how you were helping them see the light in that deep, dark pit they dug themselves into. So to see you in this state, arms wrapped around your legs and face buried in your knees while you tried to keep yourself from crying; Cassiel was fuming. But because you tried your best to hide your feelings, he felt like he needed to respect that. He knew you didn't deserve any of what the brothers were doing to you, so he said something that he thought might be better than the current treatment you were getting.

"Why don't you leave the Devildom?"

"MC! There you are!"

You just entered the ballroom when someone called out to you. You turned your head to the side and found Soley running your way. When she looked at what you're wearing, she paused for a moment, the clear hatred on her face showed before it disappeared within the blink of an eye. She clearly wasn't good at hiding how she felt. At least not at first.

"Soley? Do you need something?" You asked, your voice pulling her back from her thoughts, and she shook her head in response.

"I'm just looking for Cassiel. Have you seen him?"

You studied the girl's face and movements, barely processing her words as you remembered what you talked to the angel about.

"You don't like Soley, do you? You always seem upset whenever she's in the conversation."

"Ahaha, you're quite perceptive, aren’t you, MC? Well, you're right. I'm not really fond of her even when she's a human. I try my best to avoid seeing her."

"MC?"

"Oh uhh, n-no, sorry. I haven't seen him. He disappeared as soon as the ball began."

Soley looked at you in disbelief as if she knew something that you were clearly hiding. You became curious at what that look meant, but she brushed it aside and went off on her own way. Where to? Right, back to the demon brothers.

You took another glass full of Demonus, hiding yourself in the lounge that Diavolo and Barbatos prepared specially for you just in case you needed it. You plopped yourself on the soft couch and let your shoulders release the tension they built up. You let your mind wander until it reached that very question once more.

"Why don't you leave the Devildom?"

「 LOUE'S LETTER | CHAPTER VII 」

[green-alien-turdz]

any life tips for someone still in school(school tips or not)

really mfin struggling n your real smart so i figured id ask you first

Ion know if I'm the best person to be askin life advice from, but I'll do my best. Also I suck with mildly vague prompts, so I'll do my best.

-Give yourself some mfing grace. You are not perfect n you won't ever be. That's not a bad thing! You're only human. Of course, set goals for yourself n always aim for somethin greater, but holy fuck, it's okay to not meet that. At the end of the day, you fuckin tried n that's all that matters. Even if the only effort you can put into tryin one day is just showin up or even just plannin shit out, it's a step towards bein better. You don't have to meet all of these unrealistic expectations you have for yourself. You are not a robot.

-Take breaks. Legit, if you keep pushin yourself too hard, you WILL burn out n the longer you've been pushin yourself, the longer you will take to get outta that. People will spend years thinkin that they have to constantly be this machine. Eventually you'll start to stumble, get mad, push even harder n then fade out. It can happen in the blink of an eye, which is why it's SO important to take time for yourself. Make sure you're not stressin 24/7 about whatever it is you be stressin over. The world will not end bczus you needed to catch your breath.

-Appreciate what n who you are, no matter what stage in your life you're at. If you're flunking classes, you've still got greatness in ya. If you aren't that great at socializin with friends n shit rn, that doesn't mean you're a terrible person. We can't always be what we want to be, n there's nothin wrong with that. Every second you are alive, you are growin in one way or another. There's ups n downs, but that doesn't mean shit. You are gonna be way harder on yourself n think 10x worse of everything you do that just about anyone else would. n even if there is some dickhead out there who wants to talk shit non-stop about you, fuck what they think, man. If some sad mf has nothin better to do than to put others down, then their word don't mean shit. There are times in life where you won't like what you see lookin back at you n if you're ready to change, go for it, but if you need a minute, that's okay too.

-Make an effort to see the good. Whether you're really strugglin rn or if you're in a good position mentally, always take a second to just appreciate anythin that is good. It can be the smallest things! They can be stupid things, it doesn't matter. Find some sort of positive anchor to keep you as grounded as you can be. Life treatin you like shit n you feel like shit? At least I know that this show or movie I really like exists. Did you lose someone? Well at least you had them for the time that you did. So on n so forth. Sometimes you just gotta step outside n breathe, allow yourself to just realize that you're alive. It might not be great, or good, or even okay, but you're here n there are good things out there for you.

-

Okay, now some like actual life tips lol

-You are not your grades bro. Whether it be your parents expectations or your own, the way schools gradin works just doesn't always align with how a mf might work n operate. Sometimes we just mess up a bit too or don't understand a topic all too well n there's nothin wrong with that. It just seems like a big deal bcuz of how they like to measure n quantify how smart they think you are with a letter or number. You're not gonna get everythin in life, so it's complete bs that something that you maybe just needed more time on can have a shitty score slapped on it n have you made to feel dumb n shit like that.

-If you can get a job n want one, then fuckin do it. Apply everywhere. Even if it's somethin you don't think you'd be good at, trust me, you'll pick it up. The rejection can suck, but you get right back on the mf horse n apply more places. Call or go in to check in on your application (this just reminds them sometimes to fuckin look). Interviews can be nervewrackin, but for a minimum wage job, they'll legit be around 10-15 minutes (n that's stretchin it for some). When you get the job, you will probably feel like a dumbass or a child bcuz you don't know how to do shit yet- but give it a few weeks n you could do everythin with your fuckin eyes closed. They are not gonna treat you what your worth n it's gonna suck. Hours are long when you need more time for school n non existent when you need cash. If it doesn't work, that's fine too. Hopefully you can stay at jobs for at least a year, that shows commitment on resumes.

-Don't allow yourself to be walked all over. I know this kinda goes against some of what I was sayin in the work tip, but that's slightly different (but there comes a point there too where you need to put your foot down to bein treated like garbage). This world will try n chew you up n spit you out a hundred times over, but don't let stupid mfs be the ones to do it. That friend who kinda treats you like shit? Well, talk to them about it, see if they change. n if they don't, end the friendship. Yeah it sucks, especially bcuz you probably still care about them, but if you allow even one mf to treat you n your feelings like some useless or disposable thing, then others will take the same opportunity with you. It's not always that simple, trust me, I still have people in my life that have done horrific things to me which I still allow to treat me like shit- but if you can, please bring yourself to do it. You are worth so much more than how some people might treat you. Even if this isn't an issue in your life rn, there will be people along the way who will be douches n try to take advantage of you or your generosity or whatever the fuck else. Shut that shit down as fast as you can.